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mercurydancer · 2 years

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An Unexpected Chance Pt. 14

On Love and Sunshine

Savage took in his little brother curled up on the rock with his back pressed against Healer Tiq’s and found his hearts were warm.

He remembered what Tiq had said about not liking touch…he remembered that the rock that Tiq was sharing was his favorite. He also recognized the word ‘hatchling.’ Nightbrother hearing was acute, sharp enough to pick up the mumbled word. Savage knew in that instant that Maul was loved here. That Maul had been taken care of and he felt that weight on his shoulders, compressing his chest begin to ease.

They had been trying. They may not have always been right or known what to do with Maul, did not know that they could and would be welcomed to take him to a communal bath for instance, but they had done what they could. They had shared what they could, even if that was just a flat rock beneath a sunlamp. Even if it was just sharing space, and the barest of touches.

Maul was loved.

Savage was grateful. He could also sense the way Maul gradually drifted off into sleep, the way Tiq’s soothing aura settled around them like a balm.

The longer they soaked, the longer they were in the room it made everything hazy.

He finished washing Agen’s hair, the Zabrak rinsing it completely before taking a smaller towel and wrapping his hair in it.

“Thank you, Savage,” Agen smiled, “is there anything I can assist you with?”

Savage took in the question before smiling, “Can you tell me what Maul was like?”

“Oh,” Agen said, and there was such delight in his face, Savage very aware of Feral’s own interest, the way he perked up slightly. “Maul was…Fire.” Savage tilted his head slightly and Agen laughed. “Gosh, it’s hard to explain…” he leaned back against the side of the pool, frowning. “He was just so much. He gave so much, and he loved so much, and he did so much. He came in our Temple as a Sith Lord, and he sparked, his aura sparked, flicks of flame of power…all of him was heat and that came out in so many different ways.”

“He was always amazing with the younglings,” Eeth said. “Ahsoka met him when she was five and he…saved them. He used…” Eeth paused, “you have to understand that there is one thing about Maul that you need to know before you see the Holocrons that he left and that is the fact that Maul is one of the most proficient and absolutely deadly hand-to-hand combatants the Jedi have ever seen.”

“We had a traitor in our walls,” Agen said softly, “a traitor that decided that he was going to destroy our younglings, sacrifice them to the man who had been Maul’s Master, a man that we all believe to be dead… And if it was not for Maul he would have succeeded. His name was Pong Krell. He…had two saberstaffs. You are familiar with a lightsaber, yes?”

“Yes,” Feral said, “those are…dangerous weapons…”

“A saberstaff is worse,” Agen said.

“They have two blades on either end,” Eeth said, indicating, “and Pong Krell was a Besalisk who naturally have four arms. He used two saberstaffs, had four arms, not including the use of his legs and the ability to use the Force, and Maul…who was unarmed…challenged him.”

“That’s insane,” Feral whispered.

“You say that,” Eeth said, pointing at him.

“But he won,” Agen stressed. “It cost him…it cost him dearly for a while. Krell managed to cut Maul open from here to here,” he indicated, drawing a line across his belly just over his navel. “Maul…and I cannot stress this enough, Maul not only killed Krell, he killed him by first strangling him with Maul’s own intestines, and then taking Krell’s saberstaff which he had bled, and cutting him in half through the heart.”

“Holy SHIT!”

“You said that Maul was twenty-six now?” Agen asked.

“Yes…?” Savage said, and his voice was hesitant, worried…

“He was seventeen when he did this,” Agen said, tilting his chin up, “and that’s so much worse and yet more impressive than it was when I thought he was eighteen…”

“By the Light,” Eeth breathed, “he would have been sixteen when he was on Naboo.”

“He might have been an early seventeen?” Agen offered.

“I don’t want to think about it, my soul hurts,” Eeth said, waving a hand. “The point is, your brother killed a being that was three times as big as he was, had twice as many arms, and had twice as many weapons as he did because Maul had himself and the Force. And he destroyed him.”

“Maul bled two Kyber crystals at once,” Agen said, his words hissed, “I know this might not seem like much, but in order to do that you have to have so much hate, so much pain… But what was amazing about those crystals is the fact that they do not hurt.”

“Kybers when you bleed them are…bled, they hurt, you have to pour enough hate and pain into them that it corrupts them…these…they roared, they screamed, but they were filled with such a desire to protect, such a desire to get Krell to stop, to save the younglings that were within the crèche… They are warm. They feel like Maul. They are the strangest things, but they are also beautiful. Your brother was an utter powerhouse of ability and I…” Eeth paused, “I cannot overstate just how powerful he actually was.”

“Once he created a saberstaff…” Agen paused, “we will show you your brother’s weapons. I believe it will give you an idea of… You are Force sensitive, correct?”

“Yes,” Feral said nodding slowly, sounding about as dazed as Savage felt.

“He…” Savage paused, “his own intestines?”

“Oh yes,” Eeth said, “we have the fight recorded. We will absolutely allow you to watch it.”

“How is he still…?” Savage could not say it, horror and so much…

“Alive?” Agen laughed quietly, “well that’s easy, you see, Maul said it himself: he was always just too angry to die.”

The laughter that burst out of Feral was something that Savage could not help falling into himself, the statement so startling in the wake of everything else.

“You would be proud of your brother,” Eeth said, and his voice was certain, but there was so much warmth in it. “I am certain you are already, but you do not know even half of what he has done.”

“He called the Jedi on our bullshit more than once,” Agen laughed. “There is so much that he has done for us. He is…” he paused, “he was always family.”

“He is,” Savage said softly, “he is your family still.”

“If…if you would like,” Feral added, his voice so quiet. “We always raised our children communally and if…if you…?”

“We would be honored,” Eeth said softly, “but that of course just means that you are both now my little cousins as well.”

“Truly?” Savage asked, narrowing his eyes at the Iridonian before him. “How are you so certain that we are the younger?”

“Unless you are over one-hundred and eighteen years old I rather think I have you beat,” Eeth said with a raised eyebrow.

Savage did a spit-take without anything in his mouth.

Eeth laughed. Eeth laughed so hard he bent over double and had to get Agen’s help to keep from completely dunking himself in the water. Agen held him, also laughing, before with narrowed eyes, looking to Savage, “You said you were twelve when Maul was handed to you?”

“Yes,” Savage mumbled, staring at him in something like horror.

“Then I believe I would have you beat, too,” Agen grinned, “I’m forty-five.”

“Oh,” Savage said, feeling tension bleed from him, “I thought you were going to say you were something like one-hundred and ten. I would not have been able to handle that.”

Agen and Eeth both lost it, until from the rock, a very distinct hissing shush was heard, and the Iridonians put their hands over one another’s mouth, trying to hold back the laughter, tears in their eyes. Savage turned to see Tiq glaring at them from a single eye, the other still closed. “He’s still sleeping,” Tiq said, petting a hand softly across Maul’s small head. Savage could feel that soft reassurance, the gentle calm spreading from the Rodian, and he found himself asking softly,

“How old are you?”

“Sixty-two,” Tiq answered brightly, smiling.

“I need to lie down,” Feral mumbled briefly, flopping onto the side of the pool, which started a brief bit-down laugh from everyone. Savage lay next to him.

They were in tears.

Finally, Savage managed to get ahold of himself, sitting up slightly.

“How old are you, Savage?” Agen asked.

“I claimed thirty-eight for him,” Feral said, putting a hand on the heart of his hearts.

“Is that common for Nightbrothers?” Agen asked.

“The oldest count the years that the young are with them,” Savage said, “and the youngest choose a year for the old. I was younger than my peers when I was given twins, and the youngest knows how long the older can bear before them.” Savage smiled.

“Twelve years before Maul and I were given to him,” Feral said. “In order to keep Savage from being too lonely.” Feral paused. “Though we…we were both deprived of a brother. Of a half.”

“Twenty-six years is a long time,” Agen said.

“It is as long as I have been alive,” Feral said, softly. “It is more than you can imagine being able to be here like this.”

“It is,” Agen agreed softly. “And I am sorry for it.”

“But you are here now little cousins,” Eeth said, and the words were as much balm to Savage’s soul as anything else that had been said, the soft claim of kin, of family…

“Thank you,” Savage whispered.

They relaxed quietly, lounging or swimming through the water, Feral content to lay stretched along it and dangle his fingers in it periodically, the steam rising from it wonderful. It was good and the longer they lounged together the more relaxed Savage felt, the tension bleeding out of him. He could trust these men, Savage knew. He knew that they would not have hurt his brother. He believed Maul when he said that he had never been hurt by them…but…

But…

“Why…” Savage broke the silence softly, looking to his brother to see that he seemed to be fully asleep, and then looked back at them, “why is Maul covered in scars?” he asked. “Why was he able to stand against this Krell? Why wasn’t he armed?”

There was a pause, before quietly, “The questions have the same answer,” Agen said. “They all begin and end with Maul’s Master.”

“Maul…” Eeth paused. “I knew Maul from the beginning…I was one of the first to talk with him, but you have to understand… Maul did not start out as a friend. Maul was a foe.”

“His Master…fashioned Maul into a weapon,” Agen said softly. “He beat him, tortured him. Fed Maul on a steady diet of hate and pain and fear to the point where hate and pain and fear were all Maul knew.”

“Maul was…” Eeth paused, “trained as an Assassin. Maul was not a Jedi. He was not taken into our Temple until he…until he was defeated by Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan on Naboo and brought back.” Eeth was quiet for a moment, “Maul is a Sith, and Sith have long been considered to be the enemy of the Jedi, Maul was taught to be our enemy.”

Savage was quiet a pit slowly opening in his belly. “All he knew…was hate…and pain…and fear…?”

“His Master…” Eeth was quiet, “Maul would say ‘I do not understand’ constantly. But what he did not understand was often why would we want to help him, why would we care, why would we do this to help others, why would we love him? He did not understand…so much…”

“He did not understand affection,” Tiq’s voice drifted over towards them, the Rodian shifting on the rock, his voice so soft, so hurt. “I would try and let him feel it, feed it to him, and he asked me…he held a modicum of the feeling up to me and asked me to identify what it was. He had never experienced it enough to name it. There was so much that we talked about, so much that we worked together on. Maul was so hurt and so broken… He was one of the most difficult patients I have ever had… He wanted so much, he needed so much…and I do not think that we were entirely enough.” Tiq looked at them then, his gaze so soft, so thoughtful. “Maul needs someone that loves him enough to burn the world down in order to save him. He needs someone to put him first no matter what. We are Jedi, we cannot and will not. It is not in our training, and it is not in our natures, and he knows this. He knows that we would have to let him go. It is antithesis to his Sith training and similarly something that I believe has been a source of anguish since it was realized.” He paused, “I am pleased that he has brothers. I am pleased that he has those that will love him unconditionally.”

“Thank you,” Savage said softly, “for doing what you could for him. Thank you for teaching him about affection…about care…”

“Tiq taught him much more than that,” Eeth said, smiling.

“We all did,” Tiq countered, rolling over to better face them, his eyes much more lucid than Savage had yet seen them. It was clear that Tiq was finally warm, his blood up and remaining lethargy gone. Savage was glad. He smiled at Savage and Feral. “Hello,” he said, “I do not remember all that much initially, forgive me any confusion, or questions if you do not mind.”

“Oh, no issue at all,” Feral said, sitting up properly to smile at him. “You have done nothing to cause the need for forgiveness. Biology is what biology is.”

“Thank you,” Tiq smiled, “it is good to meet you a bit more now that my mind is clearer.”

“It is the same, Healer,” Savage said, dipping his head, “though you were pleasant enough company before.

“That is a relief,” Tiq grinned, he paused and then frowned, “did I really punch someone in the face?”

“Only someone who deserves it,” Eeth laughed.

“I did rather suppose so considering we were in here,” Tiq said, and Savage smiled, and then turned his attention to Maul that was still pressed against his side. Tiq followed his gaze and gave a soft sound. “He is sleeping,” he smiled. “Should I wake him up? Do we wish to stay here for much longer, or should we go for breakfast?”

“I believe we can go for breakfast, Healer, now that you are up for it,” Agen grinned.

“Agreed,” Feral laughed, “I am very hungry.”

Savage nodded, moving to stand up and finding…the slightest wobble. He had a moment where he really took stock of his state and found… Savage had initially thought that he was feeling the soft security and warmth from the Jedi here, the idea that they were spreading feelings of safety in order to reassure them, but now he rather thought… Savage looked to Feral who had that particularly relaxed look that he usually only got…

But that did not make sense? There was no reason, nothing to suggest… What would have even caused…?

Tiq gently began nudging Maul softly, “Hey, little Mauler,” he said softly, “it’s time to get up. We have to go get food.”

Maul snuffled quietly, mumbling, and then opened his eyes slowly, and the look of such…

Oh.

Maul pushed himself upright slowly, wobbling, his eyes half-lidded.

“Maul?” Tiq asked softly, concern in his voice, and Savage could feel the general brush against Maul, could see…

“’Lo,” Maul said softly, “s’goin’ on?”

“Maul, are you feeling alright?” Tiq asked, straightening, and shifting so he could look at Maul closer.

“Feelin’ funny…” he answered, frowning, looking up at Tiq, “everythin’ spinny?”

“How are you feeling?” Tiq asked, looking to Savage, to Feral, even as he brought a hand to Maul’s forehead, reaching out with the Force.

“Um…” Feral paused, “a…a little…I’d almost call it tipsy now that I think of it.”

“I had not noticed until I stood up,” Savage said, “there is…but what could cause that? Is there something in this room?”

“We have similar enough physiology if it affects you it should affect us,” Agen denied, “at least if it was a drug or a gas…and I noticed neither. I have felt no danger.”

“I do not feel danger either,” Savage noted quietly, “but I do not understand…”

Tiq was in the middle of carefully bundling Maul up in a towel, hushing him as he moved him.

“We used the same soaps,” Agen said softly, “you did not notice it before?”

“What could it possibly be?” Eeth asked softly.

“It seems to me that Maul got the worst of it,” Tiq noted, “but the only…” Tiq paused, and then looked towards the sunlamp. “None of you are used to a yellow sun…”

“Would sunlight cause this?” Feral blinked.

“You are used to a red sun, you have…” Tiq paused, “if your bodies are developed to handle a red sun, and they are, then a yellow sun could theoretically…” he paused. “Agen, shift the spectrum!”

Agen got out of the water and headed towards a control panel that Savage only now noticed on the wall, hidden behind foliage to try and keep the illusion of being within a sunlit grove as real as possible. Agen pulled it open and began mumbling as he worked at the controls, and Savage watched as the lights finally dimmed and shifted until the lights above them were as red as the sky that Savage had grown up in, red as a sky in Dathomir.

Savage took in Feral as he would usually see him, the familiar red hue playing across gold eyes, looking to Eeth and Agen who seemed suddenly strange in a way they had not before.

Neither of them belonged upon the surface of Dathomir. Neither of them belonged under this sun.

And then Eeth made a brief sound, a bright laugh, “Tiq, you look absolutely horrifying.”

Savage turned to the Rodian, balancing a towel-covered Maul on his hip, his red eyes distinctly bloody in hue, and then Maul looked up, and Savage felt his heart stop.

His brother was made for Dathomir, and it was something that Savage had known, but seeing his skin in the red light of Dathomir, seeing the way he blended in, the black of his tattoos scattering his silhouette, forming him to something other…

Maul was not on Dathomir.

Maul was free.

They were all free.

Tiq had never in his life expected for this to happen.

Now that it had he didn’t initially understand why he had not thought of it being possible. Tiq had known that Maul came from a planet with a red sun, and similarly he knew that Maul would sometimes get a bit…looser when sitting in direct sunlight for long periods… But Tiq had never suspected that it was because his physiology was reacting to it.

The only times that Maul had remained in the sun for long periods had been when he was comfortable, when they had time to spare, and he had been with good friends. It had made sense that he would be less guarded, would in fact relax enough to settle down around his friends, but this… This was more than that, this was almost…

Tiq was not sure how much he liked the prospect that Tiq had had more than one conversation that entered into the deeply personal with Maul while he had been in direct sunlight for a while. Tiq as a rule did not tend to discuss personal matters when his patients were in altered states of mind. There were caveats of course, but the idea that Maul had been potentially leaning towards tipsy was not something that Tiq was very pleased about.

However…Maul had always continued to discuss whatever he brought up, even after it had faded, and Maul contained enough of his faculties to tell him when he was not interested in discussing something, and the combination made him think that perhaps it was not as truly severe a breach as he feared.

Ultimately, Tiq knew better now, and he would keep it in mind for next time, he would also make sure to discuss it…if…if he ever did get an opportunity to discuss it with the Maul that had been his patient for five years. If he had the opportunity he would apologize. As it was…Tiq was now rather focused on the small body curled up against him, the soft, “I feel funny,” he said softly, Tiq giving a low click in sympathy.

“I know, little one,” he said softly, “it’s alright, you’re perfectly safe. We will take care of you.”

Maul shifted back in his arms, staring up at his eyes for a moment and then smiled at him, a lopsided, but warm and ultimately the most trusting look that Tiq had ever had given to him. “I know,” he said, “you always take care of me, Tiq, I love you.”

Tiq felt a bit as though all of the air had been sucked out of his lungs, staring down into the face of a boy who smiled up at him, and then turned immediately to his brothers, reaching out with his hands. Tiq immediately walked towards them, shushing Maul’s quiet rumbles of discontent, laughter intertwining with tears that were pooling in his eyes. Feral took Maul in his arms, still wrapped in that towel, pulling him close, “I love you,” Maul said, “I love you!”

“I love you, too,” Feral said, “I love you so much…”

“I love you!” Maul called to Savage, reaching out his hand to him, Savage gripping hold of it, “I love you,” he said to Agen, “I love you,” he said to Eeth, “I love Plo. I love Plo, can I…can I call him? Can I tell him? I want to tell him.”

“Later, little one, later,” Tiq said, “he’s still sleeping, he will. He will want to hear later though.”

“Can I tell Mace? Please, please?”

“Let’s get dressed first, okay? We can…we can contact him, and…maybe we can go for breakfast at the Temple?”

“Want to see Dex,” Maul frowned. “Love him, too.”

“We were thinking of going there for breakfast,” Tiq hummed, frowning. “I still think we technically could. We will probably hit that dead zone if we go now,” he said, looking at the chronometer. “Basking took enough time, I believe.”

“Breakfast!” Maul called out, leaning back to the point Feral had to stoop to catch him, roaring with laughter, even as Maul called out, “FOOD!”

“Alright, alright,” Eeth laughed. “Let’s all get dressed and go.”

“Oh, yes, we are very naked…that is not good for diners,” Maul stated very grandly, nodding.

Tiq nearly snorted up a lung.

The rest just howled.

They trooped into the changing room, Tiq pulling his robes on over his body, checking the insulator layer very carefully before pulling his over-tunic on. He hummed in contentment, turning his attention to Feral and Savage who were helping a very distracted Maul into his own robes, the little boy decidedly squirmy. He was finally dressed and was very insistent in helping Savage and Feral with their own clothing. They let him help with their shoes and straightening out their collars, his little face scrunched in concentration, and when they were finished Savage scooped him up gently, working on not going too fast to overwhelm him. It was probably a good idea seeing as how Maul made a soft, “Oh, weird, spinny…” comment, and Tiq was grateful that Maul had nothing in his stomach to throw up.

Maul should be able to settle on the shuttle over to Dex’, which would make the little one able to actually eat.

“Shall we call Mace?” Eeth asked, reaching for his comm.

“YES!” Maul called out, immediately reaching out towards him, his eyes narrowed. “Call Mace! I want breakfast with Mace!” He paused, “pleeee~ase!”

“Alright, alright,” Eeth laughed, “I’ll call him, hold on.”

Eeth called him, receiving a soft, “Eeth,” as Mace answered, taking them in. “Hel-”

“I LOVE YOU!” Maul called out, and Mace stilled, blinking, before looking to Maul. “I love you,” he said again, “come to breakfast! Dex, please!”

“I…” Mace said so softly, “love you, too, but…?”

“Get to Dex’s Diner,” Eeth said, quietly laughing, “we will explain there.”

“I will be there,” Mace said, and his voice was still so choked, so startled…

“Don’t worry, he’s quite safe,” Tiq said.

“I’m safe!” Maul called out, leaning over into view of the comm again, “they’re taking care of me, I’m okay!”

Mace laughed quietly, “I would never doubt it,” he said. “Would you like me to try and wake up Plo?”

“PLO!” Maul called out.

“Maul is very insistent on telling him that he loves him, too,” Eeth said.

“LOVE HIM!”

“But he can sleep because he absolutely needs it, and that is a good way to express our love and care for someone, too,” Eeth finished.

“Oooooooooooh,” Maul paused, “let him sleep! I love him!”

“Okay,” Mace answered, laughing, “I…I’ll meet you at Dex’s,” Mace said. “We will tell Plo when we see him.”

“Thank you, love you,” Maul sing-songed, and Eeth hung up the comm.

“Well,” Savage laughed, “shall we go get breakfast?”

“FOOD!”

They double-checked that everyone had all of their belongings and were properly dressed, Feral still holding Maul on his hip, responding to Maul’s happy… It was babbling, Tiq realized, listening, the happiest babbling that he had ever heard from Maul, so close…

Tiq was reminded in that moment of Ahsoka, of her as a child talking to Maul, of a million questions all at once.

Tiq listened to Maul talk to Feral and Savage about the water, about the sun, about how he was learning from himself, discussing the weirdness of Jedi, about how he thought the Dark was better – meant to be a whisper but absolutely misjudged in the poor boy’s very addled state. Tiq laughed.

It was true that Maul was clearly suffering from something close to intoxication, but there was also no doubt that the words and the sentiment came from within Maul’s hearts, and more importantly when he was surrounded and loved. It was a lowering of inhabitations, not an erasing of them, and similarly Tiq had a feeling like it might be something that he had wanted to say for a long time.

The relief that was pouring off of the small boy was nearly as intoxicating as the warmth that he poured out, the utter love he tried to push towards them.

There was no lie there, and similarly there was no shame.

Tiq was grateful.

He would talk to him afterwards when Maul was more coherent, but for now…for now it was good to just listen to Maul babble.

Joric was having a good night.

He’d been getting good tips and good conversation, he’d been able to see and fly his absolutely favorite Jedi, and most importantly he had seen three Nightbrothers. Three Nightbrothers that included one of the most adorable kittens he had ever seen.

It was damn good to see them off the planet, good to see that they were free, and they had made it to safety. Joric knew that there was no place that would treat them better – evidenced too, by the way Tiq had immediately hauled-off and punched that fucker in the face. Joric had hooted louder than the rest of them he was sure, but the man had deserved it. Definitely going on the list of unwelcome visitors.

Ultimately though Joric had been circling the platform a bit more than he usually was…looking for…

Joric saw them, immediately hovering over them at a far enough distance that they wouldn’t be hit by the repulsors and thought really hard at them.

Joric was immediately delighted when all six of them looked up towards him, his usual three immediately recognizing him and pointing towards him, Joric gleefully touching down on the parking platform waiting for them.

Joric loved Force-Sensitives, always good at following his unvoiced-requests.

Joric watched as the usual crew walked towards his speeder, the hopefully new crew walking with them, kitten perched on Feral’s hip. As they approached Joric noticed that Maul seemed extra chatty and found himself grinning.

It was good that the little one had the chance to come out of his shell, Joric thought, and there was definitely no better place than at a spa with your loved ones to lead to that little push. Joric was happy for the little guy.

They walked up to the side of the speeder, Joric opening the side for them and letting them all climb in.

“To Coco Town, please,” Tiq said, leaning forward between the seats, “we would like to go to Dex’s Diner.”

“You got it, pal~,” Joric called out, grinning at him as the doors slammed shut and he took off. “Good to see you more coherent, bud,” Joric laughed.

“Good to be more coherent,” Tiq laughed, “you may turn your heat down now if you would like.”

“Appreciate that,” Joric called back, and lowered the heat to more of a happy medium in temperature. It was always good to make sure that his Rodian guests were comfortable before he headed out in case something happened. “Heard you caused quite a show,” Joric teased, looking into the rearview, watching as Tiq rolled his entire head in the most pronounced, utterly unimpressed way possible. Joric was not the only one that laughed.

“Speaking of, speaking of,” Agen called out, his voice pitched for stern but belied by the grin that kept pulling at the corner of his mouth. “We have to talk about your angry outbursts, Tiq,” his voice was trembling over the words, laughter in it, and Tiq huffed. “You need to learn to let things go. Your attachments are dangerous.”

Tiq rolled his head in a way that was even less impressed than the first time, and Joric was howling. “I have already let things go, Agen,” Tiq retorted, “you will even find that I don’t even remember it~”

“That’s unfortunate because it was a damn good punch,” Agen said, clasping Tiq’s hand in his own. Oh, that did it.

“But…” Eeth started, working his way through the laughter that had filled his cab, delighted and warm. “But you still have…you have too many attachments.”

“Name one,” Tiq retorted.

“Your favorite rock.”

“You will pry Debbie from my cold, frozen fingers,” Tiq stated very primly, tilting his chin up. “Quite literally, if you try and split my attachment to her, really.”

Joric was only saved from careening into the next lane by the feeling of the Force gripping hold of his steering wheel, Tiq’s expression in the rearview smug enough that he damn well knew exactly who had hold of it as Joric laughed harder than he had in years.

“Debbie?” Agen squeaked.

“Indeed, my Delightful Excellent Boulder Building Incredible Endurance by making it easy for me to properly lay in the sun and get fully heated.”

“TIQ!” Eeth shrieked, “Tiq, that is the worst acronym I have ever heard in my entire life.”

“It would be,” Tiq answered, “I literally just came up with it.”

Joric was in tears. Joric could no longer see the lane, trusting in Tiq to guide them as he held onto the wheel with the Force, tears flowing down his face, the whole of them just absolutely losing their minds. Joric could not breathe, and when he finally managed to put his hands on the wheel, he was still gasping for breath, but still so utterly delighted.

“Tiq,” Joric gasped, “Tiq, you blasted Rodian, you’re going to get us killed.”

“I’m not the one that let go of the wheel,” Tiq retorted. “What are we paying you for?”

“Please,” Joric said, reaching out, “have mercy, I’m but a poor cabbie!”

“Mercy granted,” Tiq laughed. “I’ll stop now.”

“Force be praised,” Joric said, and began taking them towards Dex’s Diner at a decent clip to keep Tiq from saying anything worse. Prevention was the best way to stop death of this sort.

“Tiq, Tiq,” Maul’s little voice called out, and Tiq made an inquiring hum.

“What is it, little Mauler?”

Damn cutest thing that Joric had ever heard…

“Why Debbie? Who…who is Debbie?”

“I don’t know any Debbies,” Tiq answered shaking his head.

“DON’T START THAT AGAIN,” Joric called out, and there was an immediate burst of laughter from Tiq, which started the rest in on it.

“In all honesty I don’t know anyone that is named Debbie,” Tiq said, “it was genuinely the first name that appeared in my head, and I went for it. Though I don’t know that it was the best I could come up with…unless…oh, basking boulder… Delightfully Excellent Basking Boulder Is Exceptional… I could have gone with that; it would have made more sense.”

“If you had said that I would have crashed,” Joric said simply and there was an immediate crack up.

“So, you didn’t actually name the rock Debbie?”

“Not before today,” Tiq chirped, “but I like it I think I’ll keep it.”

Joric saw the Diner, immediately swinging in for a proper landing. “You lot need to get out of my cab before I have a collision,” he said, laughing, “you all have a wonderful breakfast, yeah? I’m off for the rest of the night, but you’ll get another one soon.”

“Thank you, Joric,” Tiq said pleasantly as they finally came to a halt.

“Yeah, yeah, you crazy Rodian, get outta here.”

They laughed and exited, thank you’s given by all.

Maul tripped a bit climbing out, immediately caught in the arms of Savage, who laughed, scooping him up in the air high, and then squishing him close, pressing a few kisses to his cheeks, Maul shrieking in a combination of delight and surprise, pushing him away with laughter.

Joric was grinning the entire way back to turn his cab in. It was a good night.

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mercurydancer · 2 years

Text

An Unexpected Chance pt 17

Ghosts

Savage had learned several things about his Brother in the ensuing weeks of working with the Holocron. The first was that while that Holocron of Maul was a hard teacher – and he was, expecting results that seemed nearly unattainable in those first few days –he was also patient. He worked with them again and again to attain those results that had seemed so out of their depth, and often filtered through with enough explanation and demonstration that Savage no longer viewed the feats that Maul expected them to perform with anything but excitement.

Savage would achieve them, they were not insurmountable, he was capable…

And this led to the second thing – Maul was gentle.

It was an odd sort of thing to realize, particularly given the nature of what Maul was teaching, and even the man himself, but there was a gentleness to it.

A gentleness to the teaching of pain.

But it was not a pain that was inflicted.

Savage had started thinking of the Holocron as Teacher, and it was much easier as Maul, his brother, took and helped focus Savage’s pain, helped him understand how to gather it.

And that was the moment when Savage looked at his younger brother, and a further understanding grew – because in those moments Savage could see how much Maul hurt.

Savage could see, could feel what felt like a bottomless well of pain lapping at his soul whenever Maul guided him, as well as something else, a burning deep resolve that was so bright it was almost blinding. Savage wondered idly what his brother would be like. His brother in flesh and in spirit standing before him, the one that was not rescued, who had grown up with this…

Feral had wept.

Savage had held him, and even as he held him he mourned… Savage mourned his brother, mourned what had happened to him, the devastating question of what had happened to him…

Maul would not speak of it.

Savage had tried to ask, tried to understand, had offered his hands and his arms and someone to hold him, but his brother refused.

It hurt in his chest to know that Maul did not want to talk to him… But there was someone who did, and indeed had.

Healer Tiq had been…good.

Savage had not understood precisely what a Mind Healer was for, even with the explanation, until he had sat before him and the Rodian had softly and gently started unspooling the tangled-up weight within Savage’s heart that Savage had not even realized was there. He had lived with it for so long it had merely become a part of his being. And that brought Savage to what Tiq had told him…

All Maul had known was pain.

Savage had not known what that meant until that moment holding Maul’s hands, feeling the gate that opened up in his little brother…

Savage was not a stranger to pain. Savage was not a stranger to training, or to slavery. He had grown up in it, with others under the same bondage, in the same…

Maul did not act like a regular Zabrak.

There were some small…some things that he had difficulty with.

Even as Tiq helped him unspool his hearts, Savage found another tightening within him, staring at a small boy, who…

“Was my brother alone?”

The question was soft, whispered out, staring at Tiq who blinked.

Tiq hesitated for a moment and then, quietly, “there is only so much that I can…tell you,” he said finally.

Savage nodded, it was one of the first things that they had discussed before they had started this, before Feral had asked if he could come and Tiq had told them about the fact that they could do it separate or together. They had eventually decided to go with separate, with the promise that all of the things they talked about with Tiq could be talked about together. It had been driven deep that the two of them could absolutely speak to each other once they felt comfortable, and similarly that if they did not want to discuss something with each other that Tiq would not be the one that told them.

Savage had not wanted his brother to know about the Choosing. Savage had not wanted his brother to know about…

Tiq had listened.

Tiq had listened to his brother.

Tiq had listened to both of his brothers, and the knowledge that all of those conversations, all of those secrets lived in that reptilian head.

Savage was both thankful and hurting.

Savage also remembered the way Tiq had spoken about how his brother had not recognized affection. Maul had confessed to having asked for them to tell something, as sometimes it was too difficult, too much…

Savage closed his eyes.

“I know you cannot tell me much,” Savage said softly. “I know that…I know that if my brother…if he does come back… I would not want you to betray that trust. But I want…I want to know…was my brother always alone?”

“Not…always,” Tiq said.

“…No,” Savage said softly, “he wouldn’t be, would he, he had his Master…but…” Savage rubbed his face. “His Master is dead?”

“We…believe so,” Tiq said.

“You are…uncertain?”

Tiq paused for a moment.

“There is a certain simplicity in the way that he died that I do not, and have never liked,” Tiq said. “There is a fact that Maul was a loose end to a man who…I do not believe ever liked loose ends. Particularly when he was within the hands of the Jedi who…we treated him with kindness, Savage, and he was so parched for it…” Tiq shook his head. “Leaving Maul with the ability to identify him would be beyond risky it would be insanity. The fact that he stripped Maul’s memories of him leaves him a constant unknown, but…” Tiq was quiet for a moment, “I have a feeling…that Maul’s Master takes great risks. He sent Maul out when he was sixteen. Maul is highly skilled and very dangerous, and had killed Masters before, but there is an inherent risk. This…puts some of his other attempts into perspective, including the potential that he was trying to make us bring Maul into the heart of the Temple under the assumption that Maul would remain loyal. I do not believe that when he attacked the Prisons he was looking to harm Maul, which suggests that something else was the goal, and putting Maul in our Temple where he could be a knife in the dark…” Tiq shrugged.

“However…and this is something that I believe needs to be noted – once we shot his ship down, once he died the Force became clearer than it has in years. We have…visions more, the connection is greater. There was one hiccup that also could be connected towards him, but it was one your brother solved, and we never found any evidence that it was caused by something outside of the Temple, and we looked long.” Tiq frowned, “on one hand he is a Sith, and a Sith that is good at hiding, that twisted your brother inside out. On the other hand…” Tiq was quiet for a moment, “in a way we won’t know. Maul was…and this is record, you could find this if you looked, but Maul’s memories were torn from him by his Master before he blew up half the prison block as mentioned. I do not believe Maul got lucky…”

“No,” Savage agreed quietly, “Maul does not seem the sort that has luck to spare.”

Tiq gave a quiet huff of a laugh that did not seem as amused as it was almost rueful. “I wish he had more luck,” Tiq said softly. “But…he is impossibly stubborn, resourceful to a fault, and he is usually more than capable of taking care of himself. Not to mention he comes up with things that I have never seen or heard of. Savage, he is at most six years old right now???” Savage felt the grin spread over his face, taking in the way Tiq leaned forward, the absolute bafflement in the Rodian’s eyes bright. “Think about this, think about this, he finds a Holocron that is not only a product of Sith Alchemy, but Nightsister Magick and he figures out how to use it. He has never touched Nightsister Magicks, he has never stepped foot on Dathomir since he was taken as an infant and he still figures it out…” Savage laughed quietly, smiling as Tiq spread his hands out, “and then! To top it off it not only makes him six years old, but it also frees all of his Brothers. You are here, Savage, and you and your brothers are all safe. Maul is the most inventive individuals I know, and he is stubborn. He does not need luck.”

“No,” Savage agreed with a smile. “He does not.”

“But,” Tiq said leaning close with a grin, “some extra luck from his brothers wouldn’t be amiss either.”

“It would not be,” Savage agreed his smile widening. “Thank you Healer…” he paused. “I am grateful that he found you. I understand that you cannot tell me all that has happened…and I wonder sometimes how hard that must be. You know Maul’s secrets in the same way that you know all the people that have given you their trust and their voices. Thank you for honoring that. I do not know if you find it a burden…but I hope dearly that it is one you carry well.”

Tiq fell silent for a moment, taking that in, before the grin gentled, soft and warm. “Thank you,” Tiq said. “If…if we discover that there is no hope…if there is nothing we can do, and he is beyond saving…beyond coming back… I will tell you more about him, Savage. But I do not believe it is impossible, and I know that they are words Maul would rather gift himself. Thank you for your patience.”

Savage bowed low and was almost immediately treated to Tiq bowing as well, the Rodian grinning at him.

“Did…you have anything else you wished to discuss?” Tiq asked when they had risen, tilting his head in question.

Savage paused for a moment, thinking of all that he knew, all that had been said… Savage thought of secrets kept and a trust that was kept even when all else had shifted… Savage took a breath and laced his fingers together, before looking up to Tiq. “Yes,” he said finally. “I…I would like you to keep from discussing this with Feral, but… I want to speak about the Choosing.”

Tiq took in the request for a moment, his expression very still and then he laced his own fingers and tilted his head in a gesture that… Savage felt his hearts leap in his chest at the recognition of an invitation, of an offer… And he leaned forward, pressing his horns to Tiq’s forehead, and Tiq quietly, gently, “Your secrets are kept always, and I shall not speak of what you want to keep quiet, but remember that you can always speak to your brother. Nothing said here needs to be secret unless you wish it to be. Now please. Talk to me of what you wish.”

Savage did.

Feral watched quietly from his place lodged in the rafters as Maul finally came out of the hall that led to the crèche, taking in the way Maul stood, the stiffness to his form. There was something else, too, something about the way his shoulders were held tight to his body, the way his fists clenched…

Maul was angry, and Feral watched as Yaddle - a female Jedi that Feral knew was one of the heads of the crèche – took a step out of the hallway to watch Maul closely for a moment, and then make a comm. She had to stay with the other children, but there was apparently no reason she could not call for backup.

Maul kept walking down the hall, Feral following, wondering who…

And then he spotted Obi-Wan Kenobi. The Jedi was walking down the hall, a casual air about him that, if Feral was not aware of the fact that he had likely been called to help, would make him appear as though he happened to be strolling that way. Obi-Wan looked to Maul, his face blooming into a gentle smile.

“Hello there,” Obi-Wan called out cheerfully, Maul looking up at him sharply. “How are you, then?”

Maul paused for a moment, but his expression hadn’t cleared, his mouth pulling down at the corners. Feral could see the way his shoulders had loosened, though, not much, but they had, and he tilted his chin up a bit more, instinctively minimizing the threat of his horns. Maul was not mad at Obi-Wan, and indeed seemed to like him, but he was still angry.

Obi-Wan took in that softening, too, Feral could see, had relaxed himself as well, and the knowledge that the human knew the tells was…nice. “Hmm,” Obi-Wan hummed, “tooka cat got your tongue?” he asked, ducking down.

“What is all this, then?” another voice, and Feral knew this one as Qui-Gon, coming down the hall. “A youngling out of the crèche?” he asked softly, also crouching down.

Maul’s expression closed, and Feral had to wonder whether or not Qui-Gon knew what had happened, whether he had been aware that Maul was in the crèche. Obi-Wan, though, rolled his eyes, “he doesn’t need to be in the crèche, does he?” he asked, looking to Maul. “You don’t want to go back in there, do you?” he asked. Maul shook his head. “There you go, Master, you see? He doesn’t want to go back, and really he shouldn’t have to. Not when he could spend some time with us. It’s been a while since we’ve talked, hasn’t it, do you want some…lunch?” And as he said it there was a mischievous grin on his face, one that Maul was narrowing his eyes at, something in his face slowly sliding towards recognition.

“I definitely am quite hungry,” Qui-Gon noted softly, nodding.

“Oh, I definitely agree,” Obi-Wan said, smiling, “hungry enough that I could eat just about anything, even…”

Maul’s expression broke for one moment to something like delight and realization, taking a step back, only to be caught by Obi-Wan’s arms, bringing him high in the air, a “YOU!” being called aloud, even as he pulled Maul’s tunic back just enough to blow a massive raspberry on his stomach. Feral was delighted, and immediately amused at Maul’s loud cry of amusement, the shriek of laughter that he could not help. Maul then shook his head, holding his hands out towards Obi-Wan in a way to push him back.

“No, no,” he said, “please put me down, Obi-Wan,” he said, and Obi-Wan immediately did so, gently helping to straighten out Maul’s tunic, hook one of his temple horns gently.

“I’m sorry, little Mauler, I should have asked first, do you forgive me?”

“Yes,” Maul said, nodding, and his expression was closing again, his fists once again forming.

“Hmm,” Qui-Gon said softly, “are you sure you forgive him? That was awfully rude, was it not? Someone should have taught you better manners,” he said blithely, raising his eyebrows at Obi-Wan. This must be some sort of inside joke, Feral thought, because Maul’s face broke into a brief grin, even as Obi-Wan rolled his eyes heavily.

But then Maul shook his head, putting his hands to his chest, “please,” he said, “I know what you’re doing. I know you’re trying to make me feel better but…but I don’t want to feel better right now. I want…I want to be angry. Can I be angry?”

“Of course,” Qui-Gon’s voice was low and soothing and both Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon sat down. “I am sorry, little one, I should have asked whether or not you wished to remain angry. Will you tell me why you are angry? Perhaps I shall be angry with you. It is sometimes better to be angry with someone than alone.”

Maul took that in for a moment, and then looked back…he looked back towards the crèche and his expression did something funny. For a moment it looked like his expression tightened to something like grief, and then firmed, and softly, “I don’t…I don’t want to talk where they might hear.”

“You don’t…want them to know you dislike them?” Obi-Wan offered softly.

Maul shook his head, “I don’t…I don’t want them to think that I’m mad at them. It’s not their fault,” he said, and it was such… It was such a grown-up thing to say. One of those things that made Feral’s hearts twist because there was a maturity and an understanding behind it that hurt. It should not be there yet…not yet…

“I see,” Obi-Wan said gently. “Well, shall we go down the hall, further?”

“There is a room that used to be a banquet hall,” Qui-Gon said, “it is quite old now, and rarely used, but it would be a good place to talk.”

Maul took that in before nodding, following the two of them as they walked. Feral stalked them, keeping his presence masked, his hunter’s reflexes honed… And then he was aware of Savage, Savage who was coming from the other direction.

Feral blinked his presence towards Savage immediately, catching his attention, watching as his brother recognized where he was and what he was doing and also leapt to the rafters. They both followed Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan into the banquet hall, sliding in after Maul, still Masking.

The hall was so big and so beautiful, even in the dust, that Feral almost lost his hold on his presence, but then he shut it down, taking in the carvings that depicted the stars.

It was the first time in a while that he had looked at them, even carved as they were.

“Now,” Qui-Gon said, having picked up his brother around the waist when he held his arms up, placing him on a table so he was closer to eye level and not having to look up as high, and stepped back a pace, Obi-Wan joining him. “What are you angry about?”

Maul was quiet for a moment, seeming to gather everything up and then he looked up at them. “I’m angry…” he paused, trailing off as though suddenly aware of what he was going to say.

“Maul?” Qui-Gon questioned softly. “What is it?”

Maul hesitated and then in the face of their quiet curiosity, the complete lack of judgement, Maul’s entire face crumpled. “I’m angry at me,” he breathed softly and Feral’s heart lurched.

“Well, if that’s the case I don’t know that I’ll be joining you in your anger,” Qui-Gon said softly.

Maul ducked his head and continued, almost doggedly, the words in a breathless rush, “but I know I shouldn’t be, and I don’t want to be. It’s my…it’s my Master’s fault, and I know it is, I know it is! But he’s…” Maul’s voice cracked, frustration and something like despair there, “he’s not here, and I can’t…be angry at him…” he wiped his eyes. “I can’t do anything about the anger towards him, he’s too…even if he wasn’t dead he is too strong for me, and he’d just hurt me… But it’s his fault, I know it is, and he did it to me, and I can’t…” He swallowed, “I don’t understand the younglings,” he said, “I know they’re my age and you all want me to be friends, but they don’t want to be friends with me. They don’t like me. They think I’m…” his voice broke then, and he gave a frustrated sound, rubbing at his face again.

“It’s alright, Maul,” Obi-Wan’s voice was soft, “you can cry, no one is going to hurt you for it. You might even find you feel better.”

“But I don’t want to,” Maul said, voice stubborn. “I don’t want to give him the satisfaction.”

“You can give the satisfaction to yourself,” Qui-Gon countered gently.

Maul blinked, surprise in his expression, and Feral watched as his face finally crumpled, and Maul began to weep.

For a moment Feral felt the urge to swoop in, to pick up his brother, to hold him tight, recognizing the feel in Savage, but Qui-Gon gave a quiet sound, ducking down to be better at eye-level and quietly, “do you want me to hold you?”

Maul took in the question between sobs, before finally holding his arms out. Qui-Gon immediately scooping him up, holding him tight and pressing a hand to his back, rubbing it up and down gently.

“That’s it,” Qui-Gon said softly, “that’s it, just let it out.”

Obi-Wan patted Maul’s back gently, the two of them offering soothing words as Maul finally sobbed everything out, and then finally, his voice a little burst of fury, “It’s not fair!” his voice cracked. “It’s not fair, they think I’m weird and I’m…” he hiccupped, “they’re scar~ed of me! I don’t…I don’t pla~y like they do, and I can’t, and I…I almost hit Juun, I almost hit her, she just wanted to get my attention, and she touch~ed my shoul~der when I didn’t see her and I almost hit her!” Maul wailed, rubbing his eyes, “they told them not to touch me, but they forget, they’re little, they don’t remember. And I…” he collapsed against Qui-Gon, burying his little face in his shoulder, horns sweeping above, “I don’t want to hurt them…I don’t wanna… They’re so loud and I don’t understand them, and I can’t tell what they’re gonna do, and they… It’s not fair…”

“Shh, shh,” Qui-Gon shushed him, rubbing his hand up and down his back. “It’s alright. It’s alright…I will talk to…” he sighed, “I am so sorry, Maul. Did you tell Yaddle you felt this way? Did you tell Mace?”

“No,” Maul managed softly, “I know…I know why they wanted me to go, that I should…that they’re my own age and I should…play with people my own age, but…” he swallowed, and even that made Qui-Gon close his eyes.

“Listen,” Obi-Wan said softly, “now that we know that you feel this way, now that we know that there is something wrong, let’s take some steps to fix it, okay?” Obi-Wan took a breath, looking to his Master briefly, his brows pinched. “Ahsoka is older than you, as is Anakin, but you have fun with them, don’t you? They are ones that do not make you uncomfortable?”

Maul nodded, looking up at Obi-Wan over Qui-Gon’s shoulder.

“Perhaps we can put you with some of the older kids. You are right that we wanted you to spend some time with kids your own age,” Qui-Gon said, “it is good for your development, but this has clearly not been good for you at all.” Qui-Gon sighed. “I do wish…that we had known about the problem earlier.”

“It was not as bad before,” Maul breathed softly, “but…” he paused, “it’s been getting worse, and…and I think they’re just…getting used to me…and I just…”

“Shh,” Qui-Gon said softly, “do you remember what Tiq says?”

“Trauma sticks,” Maul said softly, “and I have a lot of trauma.” The words were serious but there was a slight bit of a smile curling at his mouth, though it was weak.

“You do,” and the smile that was on Obi-Wan’s face was broader. “Listen,” he said, “other people might get used to things faster than you can, but that’s not a bad thing. We’ll just work together on making it so your nerves aren’t getting absolutely pummeled. It’s not right that something that’s supposed to help you just winds up hurting you. We’ll help, Maul, it’ll be alright.”

Maul reached out to Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon laughing and shifting the small boy over to take hold of Obi-Wan’s neck, Obi-Wan pulling him into a tight hug.

“Thank you,” Maul breathed and Obi-Wan’s expression briefly tightened.

“Of course,” he said, “you’re under our care, ours’ and your brothers’, we’re going to do our best. We might not always get it right, but we are going to try.”

Maul nodded against his neck.

“Now, come on,” Obi-Wan said, “maybe we can find Feral, and Savage and we can all go to lunch. Try the refectory this time, yeah?”

“Okay,” Maul breathed softly.

“Do you mind if I stay here for a moment,” Maul asked.

“Not at all,” Obi-Wan said, putting him down. “Do you want to meet us down there? See if you can find Savage and Feral?”

“Yes, please,” Maul said.

“Do you have your map?” Qui-Gon asked, and Maul immediately held out the little device. “Good,” he said, and hooked Maul’s horns gently between his fingers, giving him a brief little shake. “Take some time to compose yourself. There’s no shame in any of it, little Mauler.”

“Thank you,” Maul breathed one last time, and the two of them left. Maul wiped his face, and then finally looked up at Savage and Feral, his focus unwavering. “You’re sneaking,” he said, and there was something like…discomfort on his face, something almost like fear. “Am…did I do something wrong?” he breathed.

Feral was on the ground before he could help himself, Savage on his heels. “No,” Feral said immediately. “Not at all,” he said.

“You are allowed to cry,” Savage said, kneeling down before him. “And you are right, we were sneaking.”

“It was my doing,” Feral said. “I have been watching…I did not enter the actual crèche, Yaddle keeps a very tight ship…” he paused. “It is alright,” he said softly, sitting next to Savage. “Your Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan were both right.”

“And so was Tiq,” Savage said, his low voice serious. “It is nothing to be ashamed of…”

“Many…” Feral worked his mouth, thinking of what to say. “Many of our Brothers often struggled with such a thing,” he said finally. “I…have struggled with it.”

“As have I,” Savage said. “There is no shame. You did not hit that girl, even when you were afraid you were able to keep from lashing out. You are alright.”

Maul took that in, his lip stiff, and softly, “it’s alright to cry,” Feral said, gentle, and Maul nodded, the tears slipping. “May I hug you?” he asked, following the example Qui-Gon had given, Maul nodding and holding his arms out. Feral took Maul into his embrace, Savage also holding him, the both of them holding their brother that Feral… Feral sometimes still could not believe it.

He could not believe that he was here. He could not believe that he was safe, that the Sisters had been pushed back, and the reason for that… The reason for that was in his arms.

Feral smiled, locking his horns with Maul’s, feeling the way Maul’s nose pressed to his cheek. He was so small.

“It’s alright,” Feral said. “You are alright, brother. You are alright, Maul. Thank you for not outing us to the Jedi.”

Maul gave a surprised laugh, pulling back and wiping his face. “I wanted to see why you were hiding,” Maul said.

“I wanted to check on you,” Feral smiled. “I knew you were with the other kids and…” he paused, “I like working with younglings,” he said finally. “I was curious to see where the Jedi take care of theirs.”

“Would you want to work with them?” Maul asked, “you could probably ask Yaddle, I think she’d welcome help.”

Feral froze for a moment, thinking of asking… “I do not…”

“Trauma sticks,” Maul said softly, taking his hand in his own, squeezing. “It’s okay.”

“It does,” Feral smiled at him, squeezing back. “Thank you.”

“Do you both want lunch?”

“Yes,” Feral and Savage both agreed and Maul smiled.

“Come on,” he said, and led the way out.

Savage was following Maul to the Senate, Feral alongside him.

They were accompanying a small party of Jedi Councilors who were going to be meeting with the Chancellor. Apparently some sort of meeting that they did periodically to keep the Republic updated. Savage did not fully understand what this meant or even what it was for precisely, why the Republic needed to know about Jedi Business, but Maul was excited for it provided the perfect opportunity to introduce Feral and Savage to – as he put it – his best friend.

A female that had once been the Queen of Naboo and now worked as a Senator for the planet…Padmé Amidala.

Savage was uncertain, but the sincerity of Maul’s statement, the way he spoke of her… Savage hoped.

Savage had already met more women than he had in his entire lifetime and every one…every one Savage had felt that spark of fear, that moment of worry…and all had been kind. They kept their distance, spoke to him respectfully, were genuinely interested in what he had to say and nothing like what Savage had experienced.

The grief in his hearts was always strong in those moments…all of the things that they were denied, all of the pain that they had caused to their own people. And Savage still did not understand that.

Savage knew the stories, he knew…he knew the Legends… But why should they still be punished for that? Why should they still be paying the price for so long ago when they could be living alongside their women, when they could be in a partnership?

But there was no point now.

Not now when they were finally out… If they had contract from a Sister, if they too spoke of peace, then it was something that they may discuss, but if they did not… Savage was free. His Brothers were free.

He would take none of them back unless they remained so.

Savage’s thoughts were interrupted by a brief call from a bright clear voice, his attention immediately turning up to see a human woman. As he had often started doing, Savage immediately began taking in her physical appearance – the flush to her skin, the brown of her hair pulled in a high and intricate bun that was caged in some sort of metal, the deep blue of her sweeping garments that seemed to both hide and highlight her form – all things that were different to the Sisters, all things that would never be seen amongst them… And then he was drawn to Maul, who had lowered his center of gravity, shifting to his toes, tapping… The woman that he had to assume was Padmé lowered her own center, her eyes narrowed, the look on her face full of concentration.

And then she beamed, and brought her arms out wide.

Maul bolted.

Padmé braced herself lower, and when Maul leapt she caught him, swinging him back behind her and then bringing him up in the air above her, Maul giggling brightly as she spun down and around, the dress she was wearing apparently less constricting than it looked. She laughed aloud as she held him, finally bringing him up to tap his horns against the caged bun. Maul had yet to stop laughing.

Savage had initially feared that his brother had been some form of consort, now he found that he wasn’t entirely certain that would have been a bad thing.

But Maul had assured him that she had always simply been his best friend.

Savage watched and he thought he might believe it.

“Padmé,” Maul said then, “Padmé come, you have to meet my brothers!”

“Your brothers?” she repeated, and then Savage watched as brown eyes - large and warm in a way that he had never seen – focused right on him and his brother. “Oh!” she called out, and Savage watched as those eyes seemed to not only grow in warmth, but squinted in a wide smile, her expression nothing but the most amazing… She walked towards them then, and Savage held so still, aware of Feral beside him, the way he took a step closer.

To Savage’s shock, Padmé seemed to catch that, her expression gentling, and she stopped a good bit out of their personal space, that smile still there, still warm, still towards them.

“Hello,” she said, “my name is Padmé Amidala.”

“Savage Opress,” Savage introduced.

“Feral,” his brother said.

Padmé’s smile widened, but there was no comment about the names being strange, or even anything about how it seemed to be a theme, she merely bowed low… And Savage did not know how to take that, what to…

“It is very good to meet you,” she said. “Maul has always been a very dear and trusted friend and it is…” she paused. “I am so sorry…that it took us so long to free you. I am a Senator of the Republic and if you have anything that you think will help your brothers, will help you acclimate to being in the wider Galaxy, please talk to me about it. We will be able to hook you up with all sorts of resources, I am certain. And on a more…a great deal more personal note… I would be honored if we, too, could be friends. Would you wish to be friends with me?”

And the question buzzed in Savage’s ears and in his mind.

Would you wish to be friends with me.

Not we shall be friends, not a declaration or a statement or an order…a request.

She had asked.

She had offered help.

The warmth that swelled in Savage’s chest was… “Please,” he said, just as Feral said,

“Yes.”

Padmé beamed.

“Down, please,” Maul said and Padmé immediately put him down, that bright smile turning towards him. Maul took her hand then and dragged her over towards Savage and Feral, Padmé laughing the entire way. Savage thought that he could like her a good deal…

“Hello, Padmé,” Mace’s voice was warm, and Savage turned to look at the other man. The Jedi was smiling along with the other Councilor’s, fondness in their gazes. “Do you think we could leave them with you for a while as we meet with the Chancellor, provided no one has any objections?” Mace looked at Feral and Savage while the question was asked, and with a smile, “if you would like one of us to remain we do not all have to make a report.”

Savage and Feral looked at each other, before turning their attention to Maul and Padmé.

Padmé smiled, her expression warm and open. “I will not be offended either way,” she said.

“We will stay with Padmé,” Savage said after exchanging a look with Feral, catching the relief in his brother’s own eyes. It was all to give them freedom. Savage would have never believed…

“Good this is,” Yoda said, his voice full of warmth, and he tapped Savage’s foot with his stick. “With you we shall stay until the Chancellor has come.”

“Who is the Chancellor?” Feral asked. “We…understand that they are some sort of figurehead?”

“Yes,” Padmé said, nodding, “he is an elected representative of the Senate, our governing body. He helps mediate conversations and has the power to turn new bills into laws.”

“It is not quite like a Mother then,” Savage said with a frown. “They are not elected.”

“How is a Mother chosen?” Padmé asked.

There was a pause, Feral and Savage both falling quiet, and Savage found himself looking to Maul…

“Well,” came a voice, unfamiliar, but somehow…somehow…

Savage looked up, and slowly turned, and found his gaze frozen on the man that stood there, surrounded by what had to be aides, by guards…

But Savage could not tear his eyes away from the man standing there.

A man that he had seen before.

The hitching panicked gasps at his elbow drew his gaze once again down to his brother. To his brother that had been stolen.

To Maul.

Maul stared at the man standing there, his eyes wide and wild, nostrils flared, his ears pinned close to his head as his hands rose in something like a ward. Terror.

Pure and overwhelming terror…

“You said he was dead,” the words were whispered, broken, desperate, and Savage turned.

And stared into the eyes of the man who had stolen his brother.

And watched as the Chancellor stared at Maul with a shock that could not be hidden.

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mercurydancer · 2 years

Text

An Unexpected Chance Pt 4

Warnings for Past Child Abuse! But please enjoy more Smaul~

Healer Tiq walked on the other side of Mace, speaking quietly to him, watching Maul out of the corner of his very large eyes as he consistently snuck small glances towards him. When Mace had called Tiq to request that he be there for Maul’s check-up Tiq had agreed, though he believed very strongly in giving the little one space until Maul was able to grow more familiar with him. The opportunity to directly talk to him finally arose as Mace mentioned taking Maul for a tour around the Temple later, Tiq taking the opportunity Mace offered to level his gaze at Maul with a great deal more focus, smiling.

“How are you liking the Temple?” Tiq asked softly, “from what you have seen, what do you think?”

“It’s very big!” Maul said, “It’s also very…open. You have so many windows.” He paused, seemingly realizing the excited way he had been speaking and his mouth twisted slightly.

“It is very big!” Tiq said, smiling. “We also have a great deal of windows; they are very good for reptiles like me.”

“Oh, yes!” Maul said, looking up at him, “do you bask?”

“I do,” Tiq smiled.

“That always sounded so nice…” Maul said softly. “What is it like?”

“Well, I always find it quite refreshing and invigorating,” Tiq said. “You do know that I am cold blooded, yes?”

“Yes,” Maul said, “you do not thermoregulate and so you need help through outside means.”

“That is correct,” Tiq smiled, “my robes for instance are actually made of a much thicker material than others, while still allowing for my skin to breathe. It wouldn’t do to smother my skin. I don’t sweat but I do produce more pheromones and they do not smell all that good to those that are not other Rodians.” Tiq gave Maul a very small wink, watching as his little face frowned slightly. “But that’s why we use perfumes or suppressors.” He shrugged, “I don’t like the idea of suppressors, personally.”

“I don’t either,” Mace said, looking at him out of the corner of his eye, Maul nodding his head very solemnly.

“You smell nice,” Maul said.

Tiq smiled at him warmly, “Thank you,” he said. “Knowing your nose that is rather high praise. Regardless, basking is very…invigorating. Depending on how long I have been without it, or how cold my blood gets I can get severely lethargic. It is a very uncomfortable feeling.”

“Lethargic is tired?” Maul asked softly.

“Yes, with the added image of being very difficult to move,” Tiq answered. “So, I will remain in either a sun lamp, or in the sun itself for a few hours and then pop up right as rain. It is very nice, though sometimes it is frustrating. There’s nothing quite like sunning yourself after working on a problem for a few hours to realize that you were apparently getting very sleepy and could not think straight to begin with.”

“That does sound frustrating,” Maul said frowning. “How long does it take usually?”

“That depends,” Tiq said, “I’m usually quite careful to not allow myself to get too lethargic. I will take breaks throughout the day to sun myself, but if there is a crisis or I am kept away from it I will usually put another layer on to trap the heat and use whatever methods I can to keep warm. I have used my lightsaber at one particular juncture.”

“Oh, you have a lightsaber?” Maul asked.

“I do!” Tiq smiled.

“Yes…” Maul said then, looking away, “of course you would, you use them like the Sith…”

“Your Master has a ‘saber, does he not?” Mace asked.

“He does,” Maul agreed, “he let me use it once. It was…heavier than I thought it would be. But the lack of counterweight was the weirdest thing about it. Neither of yours are red, right?”

“That is correct,” Mace said, “mine is purple.”

“Mine is green,” Tiq smiled. “We cannot all be fancy like the great Mace Windu.”

“Hush, Tiq,” Mace said, grinning at him.

“Purple is an unusual color?” Maul asked.

“It is,” Mace agreed. “Usually, greens or blues are the most common,” he said, “though we also have yellow, though it is rare that new Kybers are found that are yellow.” Mace winked at Maul then, “Yours was yellow.”

“Was it?” Maul breathed.

“Yes,” Mace smiled.

“And thus, you made a very distinct team,” Tiq grinned.

“Do I still have that lightsaber?” Maul asked.

“I do not know,” Mace said. “I was able to find your ship and I have sent to bring it back to the temple, but I have not looked for that saber or through your ship. You were using a weapon I have never seen before when you were in the Temple.”

“Truly?” Tiq asked. “What was it?”

“A pike,” Mace answered, and Tiq found interest flooding him. “Made of Beskar.”

“Beskar?” Tiq repeated, the word almost gasped out, “how in the Force did…?”

“I do not know,” Mace said, “but I have it in my rooms.”

“Is a pike unusual?” Maul asked, looking up at them.

“It is unusual if only because it is difficult to find a material that can block another lightsaber without being cut,” Mace answered. “Beskar is one of those rare materials, but…there have been many mistakes with the Mandalorians over the years, and their Beskar is one of their closely guarded secrets. The idea of a Force User being granted such a thing is…nearly unheard of.”

“But…” Maul frowned, “I was given some?”

“Yes,” Mace said, “and from what I can tell it was either forged for you or with your specifications. It is a beautiful weapon.”

“I had seen it,” Maul breathed softly, “but I had not wanted to hold it for long. The Kyber…knew me…but I could not hold it and it was…so strange. I knew that I was not how I was supposed to be.” Maul looked at his hands for a moment, the child suddenly so solemn, so quiet. “Why am I worthy of Beskar?”

“I suppose we shall learn,” Tiq said softly, finding a slight grimace pulling at his mouth. Worthy was one of those words…

“Can I see the pike again?” Maul asked.

“Certainly,” Mace agreed, “we’ll finish with Healer Che and then we can retire back to our rooms.”

“Our rooms?” Maul repeated softly.

“Of course,” Mace said, his voice gentle, “yours is with mine. Tiq is also right across the hall.”

“And if you need anything do not hesitate,” Tiq said with a smile.

Maul took that in for a moment and then looked to him, “what were you to me?” he asked. “Mace was my Teacher…but I am unfamiliar with Jedi constructs. Do I have more than one Teacher?”

“Oh, that’s a good question,” Tiq said. “You see, Maul, Jedi frequently work together to train and take care of our younglings.”

“When one chooses a Padawan they are primarily responsible for that Padawan – they make sure they are taken care of, all of their basic needs, their training… but we also partner with other Masters to teach them. As for Healer Tiq…”

“I was your Healer,” Tiq said softly, looking at him. “In particular, I helped you with your Mind. I am a Mind Healer, which is why we are going to Healer Che for your medical checkup.”

Maul took that in for a long moment and then softly, “What does a Mind Healer do?”

“A great deal of things,” Tiq said softly, “you see…I help with traumatic moments, with depression, with false thoughts and the lies that we tell ourselves. When I was your Healer I worked with you to put some of your Hate away. I helped you learn how to wield it better, and I helped you learn that you were not filth…and you were not nothing. And Maul…” Tiq looked at Maul who was staring up at him with the widest of eyes, the most shocked of faces, “you should not use a word like ‘worthy’ to suggest why you should not have Beskar or whether you should. It is a guarded resource, and it is true that you must have done something to earn it…but it is not something inherent. You are more than what your Master told you that you were…even when he did not give you a name.”

Maul stared up at him, the three of them having frozen in the middle of the hall, his eyes so wide, so…

“I do not understand,” he breathed softly.

Tiq felt the soft smile curl his lips, his eyes squinting with it as he slowly lowered himself to be at Maul’s level, reaching out a hand. “If you will let me,” Tiq said softly, “I will help you understand.”

Maul stared at him for a long moment before finally, slowly reaching out and taking Tiq’s hand. “You’d be my Mind Healer again?” he asked just as softly.

“I would,” Tiq said, “and we will work on all of this together.”

Maul took that in for a very long moment, before finally nodding, and giving him the slightest of smiles. “Thank you,” he said, “what do I have to do?”

“We will talk about it more later,” Tiq said, “for now let’s get your checkup finished. You cannot take care of the mind if you do not also take care of the body! They are very closely linked after all.”

Mace smiled at Tiq when they started walking once again, giving him the firmest of nods, one that Tiq returned.

If nothing else…if nothing else…this was something that Tiq could help with. It was something that they could do.

Tiq was looking forward to it.

Healer Vokara Che rose with the sun.

As the Chief Healer she was responsible for overseeing those that were within her halls, working tangentially with the Mind Healers and therefore partnering periodically with Healer Tiq as their Chief. Over the years they had found that they were actually a better team than she had initially expected, the Mind Healers coming up with great suggestions for boredom alleviation on the extremely low end of the spectrum, and working very well with those that suffered from extreme trauma or guilt or suffering on the extremely awful end of the spectrum.

Lord Maul had been on both sides, not only suffering from prolonged boredom due to an inability to move, but also a terribly debilitating injury that had taken him several months to heal from.

Lord Maul had been her patient off and on throughout his career as a Sith Lord, and then a Jedi Padawan. She had never known the pleasure of having him as a Knight, for which she could never decide if she was grateful or full of regret. Maul as a Padawan had managed to get into more scrapes than she would have believed possible, only beat out by Anakin Skywalker on technicality and living with them longer. The idea of him operating on his own and what Lord Maul would have gotten into had been an ongoing joke.

One that they had never seen the punchline of.

Maul had left the Jedi and Vokara had heard word of him only in rumors and whispers, but she knew that wherever he was and whatever he was doing… Vokara rather thought that Mace Windu had reason to be proud of his Lineage.

Now…Maul was back within the Jedi, but it was in a form that no one had ever known him to be. Vokara promised herself that she would be prepared for anything. She had been the one to do all of the scans the first time, had worked to prepare diets, helped to discover and relieve chronic pains, get him functional again and again and again… Vokara knew what Maul was coming from.

This, at least, was what she told herself.

The first sight of him was almost another matter entirely.

Maul walked into her Med Bay with his hand held within Mace Windu’s, smaller and more unbelievably adorable than she had ever imagined would be possible.

But her gaze was sharp, and she knew what she was seeing, could recognize the signs of starvation, the faintest raised edges of scar tissue disappearing into his collar. He turned wide eyes to hers and Vokara took all of her urges to coo and breathed them steadily out. She approached sedately, Maul looking first at Mace and then at Healer Tiq who was also with them, and then back to her when neither of them gave any sign of her being a threat.

It made something in her heart squeeze.

Healer Che lowered herself into a bow, Maul hesitating before dipping his head in a nod of recognition. She smiled at him. “Hello, Maul,” she said softly, knowing that the boy before her had not been made into a Lord. “I am Healer Vokara Che. I will be the one that is giving you your checkup today.”

“Hello, Healer,” Maul said with a slight dip of his head. “What is a checkup?”

“A checkup is where I take a list of your vitals, like how tall you are, how much you weigh, your heart rate, and your vision among other things. We use this to create a plan for you to help you grow into a happy and healthy adult.”

Maul took that in for a moment. “How invasive is it?”

…

Vokara Che did not like that question.

“I use scanners mostly,” she said, “you will stand before them or lay on a bed that scans you,” she smiled. “Sometimes if there is something wrong I may want a closer look, but we will talk about it before that happens. But tell me, what sort of tests are you used to?”

Maul was quiet for a long time. “Not many,” he said finally, “and most of them have been done by a droid.”

“Your Master has never given you a checkup?” Vokara asked carefully.

Maul shook his head, “but he did give me my tattoos.”

Vokara’s chin tilted ever so slightly up.

“So, he did,” she said, “and they are lovely.”

Maul blinked, before ducking his head slightly, shyly, and Vokara had to, once again, fight not to coo…

Vokara hesitated, “I understand that they were given to you recently, yes?”

“Yes,” Maul nodded, “or…they were to me. I understand that it would not be recent to you.”

“That is correct,” Vokara nodded, “were they given within the last week?”

“The last few days,” Maul inclined his head.

“I would like to see them more completely,” Vokara finally said. “I would like to see that they are healing well and there is no evidence of scarring.”

Maul looked up at her with wide eyes, “Is that…something that I had a problem with before?”

Vokara’s mouth twisted slightly, “when you were within my halls before you did speak of pain and discomfort as your tattoos healed…and I do think that it might be because you were unable to keep them properly cleaned. I would like to take a look in order to make sure there is no trace of infection. I will also be providing you with something to use to…not alleviate the pain of them, but certainly keep them clean.”

Maul was quiet for a moment. “Okay,” he agreed softly. “Do you have to see everywhere?”

“No,” Vokara said gently, “he mentioned his back – including the back of his head, his feet, and his hands, and I would like to examine these locations specifically.”

Maul took that in and then slowly nodded. “Very well,” he agreed. “I do not mind.” He paused then, looking up at her for a moment and then, his voice a hissing whisper, “my feet itch.”

Vokara felt her heart briefly pang. “Alright, come on, we will look at those first.”

Maul followed her to a scan bed, climbing up as she indicated, pulling his boots off and sitting there on the edge, watching her very patiently, his hands laced just so in his lap. It was a very nonthreatening gesture, something she wondered was deliberately taught, but her attention was soon brought to his little feet and gracious…

Tiny.

Vokara sat in the examination chair next to the bed, vaguely aware of Tiq and Mace taking a seat a distance away, but her attention soon turned entirely to the small feet before her, their soles tattooed black with the toes ringed around the equally black little claws, and then lifted them up to take in the pads and felt a grimace want to pull at her mouth, but she bit it back. The pads were very dry, and she could see places where they were at the edge of cracking. All of the ink and the trauma done to them had made them very inflamed it seemed, and she immediately stood up, going to find one of her creams for tattoo care.

“Nightbrothers are not the only ones that are given tattoos as a right of passage,” Vokara called over her shoulder as she hunted in the assigned cabinet. “As such I keep a very broad selection of tattoo care, including…” she pulled out the tattoo moisturizer cream, a balm that was laced with bacta to help promote better healing. “This,” she said, holding it up so Maul could see it. “I am going to give this to you, and you are going to rub it on every single tattoo that you have. I am going to massage it into your feet first so you can feel the proper technique for it, and then I wish for you to apply it to the back of your legs to your knees so I can watch and make sure you do it correctly.”

Maul inclined his head, watching her very seriously as she dabbed a generous portion upon her first two fingers, before carefully pressing it into the heel of the pad on his right foot. Maul jerked, his eyes very wide at the feel of it for a moment, before he slowly relaxed. Maul watched her carefully as she rubbed her fingers around the edges of the pad, all the way to the center of the foot, and then against the arch that did not have padding, and then carefully rubbed it around all of the black that ringed his toes.

This was then repeated with his other foot and then she held out the cream to him. Maul carefully dabbed a little bit of the cream and began rubbing it into the line that went up from his heel to the back of his calf, and would eventually pool behind his knee.

Vokara praised his technique quietly, smiling, and then indicated that he should rub the excess into his hands. Maul did so, before smiling at her.

“Let me see the back of your head now,” she said, “and I will rub it in. I need for you to moisturize a few times a day – whenever you notice that your tattoos are very dry and very itchy. If you over-moisturize it can create a very unpleasant scab, so only do this when it is itchy – and Maul, I do mean this, you do not have to let it become unbearable before you alleviate it. That is not good for you either.”

Maul nodded his head very solemnly and Vokara turned her attention to Mace. “There are going to be some spots that you cannot reach,” she said to Maul, Mace also looking at the small Nightbrother, “and in these places I would request that you ask Mace Windu to help you, if you are comfortable with it.”

Maul took that in for a moment and then gave a very firm nod. “I would be comfortable.”

Vokara smiled at him, touched briefly by the courage behind the statement, by the way his little chin lifted to both bare his throat and to meet her eyes fully. There was truth in every part of that statement.

“Very good,” she said with a nod, “now can you take your tunic off so I can look at your back, too?”

Maul nodded his head and pulled it off, Vokara taking in the tattoos that ran along the little back and seeing the spots where it was dry and itchy. “I’m going to rub this cream on your back, alright? You have a few spots where it needs attention. I’m going to call Mace over so he can watch what I am doing, and he can help you better.”

“Okay,” Maul said with a nod. Vokara called Mace over, taking the tattoo cream and showing him how much to get before carefully rubbing it into the little boy’s skin. Maul leaned forward slightly so she could get better access and oh…she could tell how much good it was doing the little boy just from the onset…the soft purr that was rising up from him…

Vokara closed her eyes for a moment, her fingers very aware of the scars underneath her hands, even as she was desperately glad for the sound of his purr and the way that he relaxed, before carefully working it around his neck and his shoulders, and finally giving a nod. “There,” she said, “much better. Is there anywhere else you feel it a good deal?”

“My ears,” Maul said softly, looking up at her shyly out of the corner of his eye and Vokara gave a soft sound.

“We need to avoid the ear canal as much as possible,” she said, “it could cause an ear infection and that’s the last thing we need. But just for reference.” She dipped her fingers in the cream once again before Maul tilted his head so she could carefully run it around the delicately pointed shell of his ear, and then slowly down to rub it into the lobe and carefully rubbed the back of it and up into his scalp. Maul looked like he was close to falling asleep, that little purr working like a motor.

It was a much healthier sound than the adult Maul had ever managed to make, though it was still rougher than the other Zabraks she had attended. When she was finished with that ear she handed the cream to Maul and he carefully worked it into his other ear, and then rubbed it over his face, arms, and chest.

“Thank you,” he said softly, looking up at her shyly and Vokara smiled, knowing in her heart that this boy was going to be the death of her.

“You are very welcome,” she said softly. “Now I need you to lie back so we can take your scans. I am going to have Mace Windu take a blood sample later so we can get an idea of your vitamin deficiencies, and what we need to do for diet.”

Maul nodded slowly before lying back on the bed.

Vokara moved to the side, starting up the sequence and knowing in her bones that what she was about to see was going to devastate her.

Vokara breathed it out, input her codes and the parameters and activated the scanner.

Vokara told herself she was prepared.

Vokara was wrong.

Maul when she had first scanned him as an eighteen-year-old had been covered in old wounds and the evidence of old breaks rested within his every bone.

Maul now was covered in old wounds and the evidence of old breaks rested within his bones.

One of them was a recently healed break she realized, one that had been reset – and recently reset at that. Vokara would have to keep a close eye on that.

There was so much evidence of hurt.

She saved the scans to his files, making a special tab for the Maul that was a child. The bed was also able to scan his height and his weight and both… Vokara grimaced.

He was so small…

Vokara took a quick eye-check, Maul grimacing at the bright light pointed into his eye as she checked first one and then the other for pupil dilation, before finally checking his ears. By the Force his little pointed ears… Checking his throat and teeth was the last bit that required her to be in this close to his personal space, talking him through it as she worked.

She worked very carefully to check his blood pressure, the bed having provided a good pulse check as he lay against it prone… Ultimately, they would need to work on his diet, he needed some special care. But first… “When did you break your arm?” Vokara asked finally as she was making the last of her notes.

Maul was quiet for a moment, before looking over at her. “It was rebroken recently,” he said, “because it was reset. It healed wrong the first time, so it was crooked.”

“Why did it heal wrong, kitten?” Vokara asked.

“My Master threw me onto the surface of Mustafar,” Maul answered, his gaze perfectly level, giving a slight shrug of his shoulders. “They didn’t set the break and I didn’t get a chance to set it because I didn’t have anything to set it with… I had to get back to my Master.”

Vokara was trembling. It was a very fine tremor, something that she was certain was not visible to the boy that was still watching her quietly. “He threw you onto Mustafar?”

“Yes,” Maul said. “I had to find my way back…to that place,” he frowned, something in the curve of his mouth.

“That must have been scary,” Vokara said softly.

Maul shook his head. “I had…wanted to go onto Mustafar,” he said. “Deenine told me that I would die, that I couldn’t breathe, and it would kill me…but I had always wanted…to go outside. I could see it through my window…when I…when I had a window…” Maul paused, looking at Mace for a moment, “it wasn’t anything as nice as the window in…our room…” he said the words as though he still wasn’t sure that they were real, as though…as though… “I could see out of the big window in our room fully,” he said, “I had to jump to see out of the old one.”

“Did you ever see anything out of it?” Vokara asked.

“I…” he paused, “I had thought…at the beginning that it was a boy…another boy that was out…and then I realized it was me. But there were…there were…” Maul trailed off, and his eyes were so…his face slowly crumpling and softly, brokenly, “I just wanted to see if they would help me… I didn’t want…I didn’t want to hurt them,” Maul’s voice cracked, his eyes so wide and so devastated and…

“Hurt who, kitten?” Vokara asked softly.

“They were…they were miners,” he breathed, “they had masks that protected them and gear that kept their feet from burning and they…they could breathe and…I just wanted to ask for help! I just wanted to ask for help and they hurt me! They hurt me and I couldn’t get them to stop, and I fought back and…” Maul’s hands went over his face, and he was so still and so… Tiq came forward then, Vokara taking a slight step back, so…

“Maul,” Tiq said very softly, and Maul peeked over his hands, and his eyes were so wet, so wet… “Maul, listen to me,” he said softly, “I have some questions for you, and I want you to answer them as honestly as possible. Just yes or no, or shake your head or nod, okay kitten, shake or nod.”

Maul nodded.

“Did you want to hurt them?”

�� Maul shook his head.

“Did you try to get them to stop without violence?”

Maul nodded.

“Did they attack you first?”

Maul nodded.

“Did you fight back when you had no other choice?”

Maul nodded.

“Did you kill them?”

Maul choked, his eyes flooding, and a desperate terrified sound hitched in his chest.

Tiq opened his arms wide, Maul stared at them for just a moment, stared at him, and then pitched himself into his arms with all the force of a tiny missile, Tiq’s eyes widening in slight surprise before immediately adjusting, pulling him tight and pulling him close. “It’s alright,” Tiq whispered, “it’s alright. You didn’t have a choice, they didn’t give you a choice, it’s alright…”

“They stopped moving, they were…they were still, and they bled and I…” Maul shuddered, his voice cracking, “I didn’t want to, I didn’t want to, I didn’t I didn’t I didn’tIdidn’tIdidn’tIdidn’t…”

“Shh, shh,” Tiq breathed, “it’s alright, it’s alright, I know, I know.” Tiq took a breath.

“I didn’t know it would be like that,” Maul breathed so softly, “I didn’t know… I watched and I stared, and Master said…that they weren’t…they weren’t worth anything, and that they were weak and pathetic because they weren’t…they weren’t like us, and I…” his breath hitched, “I did well.” Maul’s voice cracked, “I don’t want to do well. I don’t want to… I saw it in the Force, I watched them vanish, they were just gone and I…” Maul shuddered in his arms, and finally fell into sobs. Tiq held him tighter, shifting properly to sit him in his lap and just hold him, hushing.

“I have you,” Tiq breathed softly, “Maul listen,” he said, his voice soft, low, “we can’t bring them back…” Maul’s sobs hitched, “but they have gone on to join the Force. And listen, kitten, listen…there was nothing you could do. They gave you no choice. They gave you no choice, and for as terrible as it was you are not to blame. You acted just as you should have, you defended yourself…and I am so sorry it ended like that. I am so sorry that you had to watch that. It’s not right and it is not fair that you should have to. Your Master was wrong when he said they were weak and pathetic because they weren’t like you – but they were also wrong when they tried to kill a child. If you had done nothing they could have killed you…and this, too, would have been terrible. Killing in self-defense is not just necessary it is understood and defended. There are laws to protect the people like you that have been forced to do it. It is something that you are going to live with, Maul, it is something that will weigh upon you…but I want you to know that it needed to be done and you hold no blame. You hold no blame.”

Maul buried closer, shivering with his tears, Tiq looking towards Vokara and Mace, tilting his head towards them. Vokara and Mace both approached, lowering themselves down to press a hand to the little one’s back. His breath hitched in his throat, looking over his shoulder to see the two of them there.

“Tiq is right,” Mace said softly, “you hold no blame.”

Maul shuddered, his eyes wide and wet, and finally wept, huge tears falling down his face, a high wail leaving him, and they hushed him and comforted him, Tiq pulling out his handkerchief and carefully dabbing at tears.

Vokara was not surprised to see how Maul finally tired himself out, his head lulling forward against Tiq’s shoulder. Tiq carefully bundled him close, hushing, and finally, quietly, Maul fell into soft even breaths. They had a moment where they sat there, quietly processing their own grief, before Tiq smiled at them.

It was a rough smile, lopsided almost, before softly, “I have wanted to tell this little boy that it was alright for years,” he said quietly. “I have wanted to hold him in my arms and tell him that he was not to blame…for so long…” Tiq fell silent for a moment, looking down at the small bundle he held. “Thank you for coming and for speaking. It is good to have outside confirmation. It is good to remind him.” Tiq looked at them. “I think we can safely put him to bed for a nap, I think.”

Mace nodded, “Carry him,” he said softly and Tiq smiled, carefully easing himself up. Vokara told Mace that she had the results she needed and gave him the chip for the blood sample with instructions to make sure that it was taken after a period of fasting. “I will,” Mace said with a nod. “Would after he wakes up be fine?”

“Six hours at the least, Mace,” Vokara said softly. “Nightbrothers have a quick metabolism and I don’t want that boy to be kept hungry deliberately. After he wakes tomorrow should be fine.”

“I will make sure to take it,” Mace said with a nod. “Thank you Healer.”

“Thank you both,” Vokara said with a bow. “All told, Maul is as healthy as can be expected. The only thing that needs to be watched at the moment is his weight and his diet and to watch that break. Has he talked about pain in his horns yet?”

“Yes,” Mace said.

“Definitely talk to Eeth and Agen, but…” Vokara walked to one of her cupboards grabbing various balms for pain relief and bringing them back. “These will take the edge off.”

“Thank you,” Mace said, taking the balm for his horns and the one for his tattoos.

“Keep those tattoos clean,” Vokara added, and handed him another soap, Mace smiling at her roughly, before they carefully said their goodbyes and left.

Maul was still fast asleep against Tiq’s shoulder.

#star wars #star wars fanfic #maul #darth maul #healer tiq #mace windu #vokara che #maul is very tiny #and he also has a lot of tattoos #wrath of darth maul references #kid fic #an unexpected chance #twin sons

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