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dumb-teambucciarati-headcanons · 10 months

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Got any headcanons about team Bucciarati and their relationships/thoughts on the members of La Squadra? :eyes:

Yes!!! I love this ask! This is gonna take place in my everyone lives au, that most of my headcanons take place in. SPOILER WARNING btw

this one is kind of long.

-firstly, Trish hates them all and for good reason.

-secondly, Bruno has an issue with their morals when it comes to selling drugs. Because drugs are like, his least favorite thing. They call him no drugs Bruno.

-Thirdly, they all adore Sorbet and Gelato!

FORMAGGIO:

- Giorno gets along with formaggio alright, he thinks he is a piece of shit though. But he finds his shrinking stand to be very interesting and they have combined their powers together before to make a tiny jungle.

-Narancia and Mista are best buddies with Formaggio, and they cause chaos all the time. Narancia and Formaggio have a little rivalry going on though because of their fight, but they’re pals because they are all dumbasses.

-Fugo hates him because when Fugo gets upset about something, Formaggio will activate his stand to make him small so his yelling is higher pitched.

-Abbacchio doesn’t like when Formaggio is around because he makes the loud ones even louder. He has a special pair of noose cancelling headphones for when he visits.

-Bruno doesn’t really talk to or like Formaggio.

ILLUSO:

-Giorno respects him for the fight they had and the determination he showed. Hates his guts though.

-Illuso can’t forgive Giorno, Fugo, or Abbacchio for causing him to go through so much pain. He doesn’t know if he blames Giorno or Fugo more for getting infected so bad with Purple haze. Those three don’t really like Illuso that much, Giorno is the only one that at least respects him out of the trio.

-Bruno thinks his stand is neat because he likes other dimension stands.

-Trish thinks his hair is ugly.

PESCI and PROSCIUTTO:

-Prosciutto likes Narancia because he reminds him a little bit of a braver Pesci. Pesci doesn’t like Narancia because he is jealous of him/thinks his big bro likes him more (which isn’t true). Narancia won’t forget how prosciutto made him look like a rotten grape.

-Mista likes Prosciutto because he shot him three times in the head, if it had been four times his ghost would hate him. He thinks Pesci looks like a pineapple.

-Abbacchio thinks Prosciutto is wonderful because he was the cause of “the best nap of his life” when he was in the turtle on the train. Like sure it almost cost him his life, but to be able to sleep like that again.

-Bruno doesn’t think Pesci is anything like Narancia, but can see where prosciutto is coming from. Bruno didn’t like Pesci at first, and is often irritated with him. But he does have a soft spot for him now.

MELONE:

-I think they all hate Melone to be honest.

GHIACCO: (or however you spell his name)

-Fugo and him talk about their anger issues and pet peeves, and Fugo gives him advice about how to control your anger better. They surprisingly get along alright, but if they are both upset at each other it is bad.

-Mista likes to irritate him. Narancia irritates him, but not on purpose.

-He and Giorno and Fugo went ice skating one time, he made the ice rink. It was summer. People were confused.

RISOTTO:

-Abbacchio doesn’t like him, there can be only one best dressed goth in town.

-Bruno respects him and likes how he cares about his team. Risotto likes Bruno, but what is up with that haircut? When his team complains to him about something he will say “well at least you aren’t working for a guy with an ugly haircut like bucciarati” and someone from his team responds with “yeah, but we get the ugly hat …”.

-Risotto likes Narancia because of how he “let him” use his stand that one time. Narancia thinks Risotto has a better outfit than Abbacchio, but he won’t say it.

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ask-sorlato · 1 month

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Hello People!!

Been thinking about starting one of these for awhile and I finally found the courage so I'm starting an ask blog/fresh blog all together! Been wanting to for ages and I've also been inspired from my other favourite jjba ask blogs out here so I decided to join!

Anyways, without further ado, here are some rules and possible notes about this blog

As there isn't much canon of Sorbet and Gelato in the show like at all, this will be primarily headcanon based (I'll list some at the bottom)

I will accept some nsfw/spicy given that they are not too extreme (they are gay Italians, some spiciness is to be expected after all)

If I don't answer an ask straight away or at all, it's because I'm either busy with college stuff, burnt out, or the less likely option is that I may be uncomfortable with the ask (rule above this one)

No hate, otherwise Sorbet will set Gelato on you

Be nice pleaseee

Extra note before the Headcanons is that this will be set post-events of golden wind in an au where the La Squadra live and so do Sorbet and Gelato (I will further elaborate in the Headcanons)

And here are my Headcanons for them!

Sorbet is 33 and Gelato is 32

Sorbet can cook and Gelato is banished from the kitchen unless under TIGHT supervision

Gelato used to be in the army

Sorbet is really good with guns

Gelato is really good with knives

They are married (ofc)

Instead of dying, they managed to escape Cioccolata and Secco after having been captured on a complete whim, though not completely unscathed (they were both traumatised+left with a few scars)

Gelato is an unhinged, feral little-

Sorbet is the rational half of their dynamic

After Don Giorno defeated the boss and took over, they settled down (still kept in contact with La Squadra though, they are familia after all)

Speaking of which, they treat them all like their children with a few exceptions (I.e. Risotto, Prosciutto)

Sorbet is 6'0" and Gelato is 5'8"

These Headcanons will be updated with time. Anyways, hope you all enjoy! (:

(mod- @bustingitdownautismstyle)

#jojo no kimyou na bouken #jjba #jjba part 5 #jojos bizzare adventure fanart #jjba sorbet #jjba gelato #sorlato #la squadra #la squadra di esecuzione #sorbet #gelato #sorbet and gelato #new ask blog #ask blog #yippee

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squadrah · 9 months

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So you had two asks about La Squadra being toddlers, but what about them being old/older men? Maybe in their 40-50's or as senile old people. And my mind ain't exactly wondering there, but what do you think they'd be like as dilfs?

I managed to find an old post where I was asked what they would be like as old man: here it is! You also reminded me that I had once written about them as parents in general, and I could have sworn I published it, but I ended up finding it at last in my drafts, so I'll make sure to queue it after publishing this ask!

That just leaves the question at the end, ehe... I will try to do these from the perspective of a young adult, probably a friend of their child(ren), while they themselves are in their forties and fifties.

Risotto: His sheer size and deep voice are already enough to set the butterflies aflutter, so the way he wears sleeveless shirts and dirty overalls at home is almost too much. He is best observed in the garage where he enjoys quietly working with power tools, and nobody can look at his work table without imagining him sweeping off the clutter to make room for them instead...

Formaggio: He ages so gracefully he looks like he could still be in his thirties, but the way he cracks open a cold one while giving clever responses and showing at least basic knowledge of just about any topic introduced hints at decades of experience in a variety of areas. Whenever he playfully manhandles his spouse in the kitchen, guests cannot help but chug their own cold beverages in vain.

Prosciutto: Never seen without his signature dress shirts and crisp trousers, and when he's around, the temperature always drops enough that all unnecessarily noise and frolic dies down. Most agree they would not want to live with him as their father, the bar is just too high in that respect, but nobody would mind him in a hotel chair with a bourbon in his hand and ordering them to get to work...

Pesci: At first he seems nothing special, especially because he's not much respected by his children, but as soon as he easily lifts something that he ought to struggle with at his size, and tells you how much he think it weighs by touch, the magic begins, and those who have gone on fishing trips with him on the weekend and watched him reel in that big bass are now smitten for life.

Ghiaccio: Whenever you meet him, he's either preparing to go for a run or has just returned from it all sweaty and glistening, and no real decrease of stamina to show for it. Going to the gym with him is a rite of passage; he will explain every machine and challenge you to various feats of endurance. Spotting is obligatory, and many hit the showers afterwards in greater frustration than they began.

Melone: That one anon ask of "your dad looks gnc af" sums him up perfectly, he is so impeccably and unabashedly A Look and An Icon that all his various issues are easily buried in a tidal wave of gender envy and lust. His children are so confident and well-educated when it comes to sex that their friends can only imagine what a wealth of experience could be gained from the fountain head.

Illuso: He always lets his luscious long hair down at home, physically and metaphorically, and exudes such minor soap opera antagonist vibes that his heckling his children and spouse come off as almost entertaining, a good example of how much people forgive to a pretty face and a nice tall figure. He's not above teasing his guests either, and you will either hate him for it or want to kiss him.

Sorbet: He's not conventionally attractive and seems to love his plants more than his children, but he has a certain Addams Family aesthetic about him that carries his dry wit and odd ways perfectly, especially when he's trimming his bonsai or is outside gardening in the shade in special gloves and up to his neck in dirt. You are welcome to indulge his obscure opera obsession, but watch out.

Gelato: That one extremely friendly dad that claps you on the shoulder and shoves a drink into your hand as soon as (and even before) you hit drinking age, and is always two seconds away from hugging you and kissing you on both cheeks in a fit of camaraderie and general mirth. Watching him grill sausages and cook in a big outdoor cauldron permanently changes your brain chemistry.

#jjba #la squadra #risotto nero #formaggio #prosciutto #pesci #ghiaccio #melone #illuso #sorbet #gelato #squadrah headcanons #squadrah original #this is probably my first day of feeling clear headed enough to answer asks again!#we'll see how it goes!

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dolce-tenebra-toscana · 3 months

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BUONGIORNO/BUONA SERA.

Ho una richiesta ma questa è serie (non come tu sai quale HAAHAHAH)

Chi tra la squadra preferisce il cioccolato al latte, cioccolato fondente, cioccolato bianco, cioccolato extrafondente etc?

Amoooo, nel mentre che faccio pulizia nell'askbox ti rispondo 💜💜👀👀

( tvb and to all you lovelies i now accept anonymous asks )

La Squadra's fave chocolate type 🍫🍫

Risotto ✂️: extra dark chocolate, and as our beloved capo would say " Amaro come la vita " ( as bitter as life )

Prosciutto 🍖 : cioccolato di modica; as a proud sicilian he can't but be fond of the traditional chocolate they make in Modica! A decadent delicacy...just like him~

Formaggio 🧀: milk chocolate; this man has the taste buds of a child when it comes to sweets, so give him some ovetti kinder and he is happy lol 🤣

Illuso 🔎: cioccolato gianduia; not really into chocolate but if it's balanced with the toasty aroma of hazelnuts. His palate is as picky as him, and will bully you for your own preferences ( sto str*nzo )

Melone 🍈: chilli chocolate; more than the taste he likes the sensation it leaves on it's tongue ( lil weirdo) and of course he uses this type of chocolate to seduce his next target, watch out ladies cause purple boy here likes it spicy~

Ghiaccio 🧊: doesn't like chocolate; sorry but our favourite vicentino is very picky and selective so chocolate doesn't even have a spot in his top 20 foods 😅 he will give it to you if he happen to have some, just cause then you'll have to return the favor

Pesci 🐟: white chocolate; pesci could literally eat sugar straight out of the jar and still say is too bitter 😅 but because of this he is the only one that enjoy the marvelous, delicious, amazing white chocolate like the literate fella he is 😌

( whoever says the contrary, LIARS )

#la squadra #la squadra headcanons #risotto #prosciutto #formaggio #melone #illuso #pesci #ghiaccio #i am team pesci in this #white chocolate supremacy #answered ask

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icerisotto · 10 days

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Hi do you think you could write about la squadra and a new teammate who’s quiet and reserved majority of the time but one day they catch them laughing their asses off at one of formaggios really bad stupid jokes?

‹ honestly, i've imagined two scenarios this request: la squadra under diavolo's reign and la squadra under giorno's reign.

‹ it may look inaccurate regarding the gw timeline, but i'm using my headcanon timeline (which can be seen here) in which sorbet and gelato actually died in mid-2000.

‹ with that being said, double scenario!

⌦ warnings: gender-neutral character, mentions of death, mentions of depression, referenced violence, non-canon information, canon events.

➢ scenario one (diavolo).

☆ sorbet and gelato's death impacted the group in every single way it could. it blew their confidence, ruined their already-strained relationship with the boss, and brought shame to their name.

★ as a way to make sure they weren't trying to plot against him again, diavolo assigned a newbie to the team to halt any attempt of betrayal weeks later. a young, reserved and quiet person, enough to unnerve any traitor.

☆ it worked, as la squadra felt too uncomfortable around the newbie to make any other move. some of them even theorized that the newbie was sent to supervise them. naturally, their discomfort turned into hatred very quickly.

★ prosciutto deliberately hated the newbie because of their mysterious personality, even though he tried to keep his cool to preserve his image as the second-in-command. he'd never talk to them aside from missions, and would constantly use training or punishments to take his anger and frustrations on the newcomer.

☆ ghiaccio also openly hated the newbie and believed them to be a spy of the boss. he wasn't afraid of beating the shit out of the newbie if they ever cross his path or boundaries (something extremely easy to do, considering his mood swings). as a fellow, ghiaccio hardly acknowledged the presence of the stranger.

★ pesci is a gentle guy but loyal to his brother. when he realized prosciutto despised the newbie, he automatically avoided being seen talking to them. it didn't mean he was rude or cold like the others: he was willing to welcome the newbie instead of distrusting them over something they had no say in, giving them knitted gifts and food behind the others' backs.

☆ illuso knew how it felt to be hated by his teammates, especially because of his rough start in la squadra. he still decided to ignore the newbie's presence, much like ghiaccio but without the violence part. he simply distrusted them and refused to be friends with them, sometimes walking out of the room or into the mirror world whenever the newbie showed up.

★ risotto welcomed the newbie normally but lacked warmth due to his friends' deaths. he couldn't embrace the newbie as a true part of the team and only stepped up for them in extreme cases. in general, the capo kept his distance from the newbie and barely talked to them outside their working hours.

☆ formaggio was the closest friend of sorbet and gelato, almost a third party of their couple. he was miserable once the lovers died to the point he almost died of depression. a newbie wasn't what he wanted, not in the slightest. at first, he was hesitant and even resented the newcomer, but he soon overcame his grief and returned to his normal self. he's the only one to treat the newbie like a friend.

★ melone was neutral. while he also was very close to sorbet and gelato, he knew it'd be stupid to lash out at someone who was a mere pawn of diavolo's wicked plans. he was skilled enough to detect any malice in someone, so his suspicions died down after a few months. of course, he still kept his distance just for the sake of his friends' feelings.

☆ la squadra started changing their minds after a year went by without any incident. the newbie proved to be a strong-minded person, not giving up or cracking even though they went through many incidents and violent outbursts caused by the team.

★ some of them regretted their behaviors, some didn't. however, they all agreed the newbie wasn't trying to betray the team nor represented any risks, thus being worthy of their trust and decent treatment.

☆ the newbie was always accompanied by formaggio ever since their arrival as he was the only welcoming member of the team. they were extreme opposites: while the newbie barely talked, formaggio kept the mood bright.

★ during a celebration among passione members, everyone gathered at the bar as formaggio told them one of his silly, overused jokes. at that point, 2/3 of the team was drunk.

☆ formaggio's joke was interrupted by a cackle. everyone was surprised to hear the newbie's laughter for the first time, as they always looked neutral 24/7. some of them could recall hearing a similar sound at midnight when walking down the hallways, but who could think the newbie was responsible for that?

★ formaggio bragged about making the newbie show their soft side, happy to be the one to achieve this. pesci and melone laughed, illuso sneered, while prosciutto and ghiaccio were visibly surprised (although they pretended to not care). risotto remained stoic with a hint of a smile, secretly enjoying seeing his friends bonding.

☆ it still took them a lot of time to accept the newbie completely, but they were embraced after a long period. even though la squadra still felt hesitant around the newcomer, the display of humanity eased their minds. finally, they were ready to move on and let go of their grudges.

➢ scenario two (giorno).

☆ la squadra was livid once diavolo died. having a teenager controlling the mafia was concerning at first, but giorno's management deeply pleased them. they got raises and territories, all they ever asked for.

★ however, after cutting their main income (drugs), passione struggled to keep their balance. as a new alternative, giorno split the drug division and sent their members to other teams. that's how la squadra gets a newbie after so long.

☆ at first, prosciutto didn't appreciate the new member. he was stressed enough with five idiots under his belt, so another one was hell. however, he felt less grumpy once he came to realize the newbie was reserved and silent, something he appreciated. generally, he made small talk always related to work.

★ ghiaccio hated the idea since the beginning and vocalized his dissatisfaction very often. again, he'd throw hands if he ever felt disrespected or cornered. he still kept his distance once he realized the newbie was nothing like the others. they looked annoying in his eyes.

☆ pesci felt excited by the arrival of a new friend, that is until they met. serious people scared him, so he started avoiding the newbie much like he did with risotto, illuso, and ghiaccio in the past. prosciutto and risotto's serious face was enough for him, he didn't need anyone else scaring him (even if not on purpose). it took him a while to get used to their personality.

★ illuso didn't care much. he felt a little pissed about the disruption of their team dynamic at first but quickly overcame it once the newbie proved to be a decent asset instead of a crybaby or loser. in general, he didn't initiate any dialogue and felt relieved the newbie was reserved.

☆ risotto was secretly happy about the newbie's personality. from the hardheaded (illuso and prosciutto) to the silly (formaggio), weird (melone), coward (pesci), and violent (ghiaccio) members, every entry on the team was probation to the capo. he almost knelt and thanked god once he met the newbie, appreciating their reserved behavior. in general, the capo treated them like he'd treat the others.

★ once formaggio met the newbie, his new goal was to make them crack. he wanted to be friends with them and share nice moments. it became a full goal of his, and he'd spend 100% of his time chasing the newcomer everywhere they went while trying to squeeze a single smile out of them.

☆ melone, much like formaggio, became intrigued with the newbie's cold facade. he and personal space were enemies. he wanted to decode every inch of the newcomer's personality, often asking them personal questions to no avail. he cherished every nugget of information he got.

★ by the second or third month, everyone got used to the newbie's presence. some of them still felt hesitant around them but had some respect. pesci, melone and formaggio were the ones who actively befriended the newbie, even though they were stiff and quiet.

☆ somehow, the newbie accepted an invitation to play poker with la squadra after formaggio begged on his knees for them to join the game. even prosciutto got forced to participate by risotto.

★ a few empty bottles later, the game got serious and the bets started. melone had lost a bet and had to remove his shirt, revealing a so-then-hidden tattoo. it looked botched and silly. as formaggio made a nasty joke about it, the newbie snorted.

☆ all eyes were on them, as everyone felt genuinely surprised to see the newbie laughing so hard over such a silly joke. it was the first time they ever saw their teeth. tears of joy slid down their face, mostly because of how intoxicated they were.

★ even though they agreed not to make the newbie feel ashamed about that incident nor comment on it later, la squadra felt more comfortable about befriending them after realizing they only needed a little hand to be likable.

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tenthgrove · 2 years

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Can I bonk La Squadra? Like, use a squeaky toy hammer to bonk their heads?

-🥲

Risotto: “Well, I should be immune, you cannot reach my height.”

*Ghiaccio and Gelato, resident short kings, look around nervously*

#ask la squadra #🥲 anon

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berylcups · 21 days

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What type of music do you think la squadra members are into?

Also what type are you into!

What’s La Squadras Favorite Music?

Oh good question! This one definitely made me think! Thinking about their lives outside of their work makes you wonder…

CW: weed? And Melone just being Melone

Risotto

Music genre: Definitely metal this poor guy is a walking stereotype I stg 😭

Bands: Opeth, Dream Theater, and a classic-Rob Zombie

Where/what do they do while listening to music?-

He’s usually listening to his favorite songs in his office doing paperwork. Rarely if he’s in a good mood you can hear him lowly hum to the melody 🥺

Formaggio

Music genre: stoner rock - I’m not familiar with this genre but Formaggio would be! I HC him hard as someone who’s super chill and wants to relax with some psychedelic music.

Bands: Grateful Dead, Black Sabbath, Fu Manchu