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astrojulia · 11 months

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Tarot Cards as Professions

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Major Arcanas:

The Fool: Work with abroad, connections with imports, language teacher, multinationals, entrepreneur, intern, college student, art major.

The Magician: Entrepreneur, job that needs skill with the hands (acupuncture, hairdresser, artisan), actor, salesperson, influencer.

The High Priestess: Education, especially children, nutrition, psychology, cook, housewife, food engineering, toy factory, fortuneteller, spiritual advisor, librarian.

The Empress: Management, business administration, foreign trade, secretariat, translation, decoration, stay-at-home mom, model, cook, farmer.

The Emperor: Business administration, work related to areas of technological innovation, the military or sportsmen, CEO, tycoon.

The Hierophant: Philanthropic areas, ONGs, religious work, social work, diplomacy, and a degree, journalism, writer, editor, priest, spiritual guru, politician.

The Lovers: Sales area in any sector, tourism, theater, advertising, the arts in general, porn star, stripper, masseuse.

The Chariot: Activities related to transport, cars, the latest technology, chauffeur, mechanic, athlete.

Strength: Aesthetics, physical education and various body therapies, medicine, zoologist.

The Hermit: Teacher, writer, doctor, antique dealer, restorer, librarian, gardener.

Wheel of Fortune: Financial market, exchange offices, casinos, lottery houses, stock exchanges, and areas related to public relations, hospitality, game show host.

Justice: Public jobs, won through competitions, politics, police, with government positions, in the diplomatic area, law, insurance company worker.

The Hanged Man: Nurse, auditor, inspector, porter, secretariat, general assistants, yoga instructor, prison guard, philanthropist.

Death: Doctor, farmer, geologist, business administrator, gardener, accountant, assassin, death row executioner, surgeon.

Temperance: Working with liquids in general or with what is transported in liquid form such as alcoholic beverages, medicines, juices. chemist, chef, food critic, regional or even international traffic.

The Devil: Does not limit the individual to a professional wing, so he can also go to extremes for the desire he has, such as landlord, drug lord, sex trafficker.

The Tower: Social assistance, humanitarian aid, medicine, firefighter, police officer, construction worker.

The Star: Music, painting, sculpture, poetry, cinema, makeup artist, dressmaker, beautician, agent, promoter, sound artist, astronomer, harpist, dealer, meteorologist.

The Moon: Oceanographers, sailors, fishermen, owners of bars and restaurants or nightclubs, artists in general, medium, hypnotist, psychiatrist.

The Sun: Motivational speaker, entertainer, comedian, social relationships, work with the public, artist in general, member of society.

Judgment: Work done at home, connection with the law, lawyer, judge, work with disabled or people excluded from society, social assistance, board member, executive producer, director.

The World: Pharmacist, massage therapist, scientist, teacher, community leader, religious leader or priest, fashion designer, makeup artist, interior decorator.

Wands:

Creative industries such as advertising, marketing, and graphic design.

Entrepreneurship and starting your own business.

Athletics, sports coaching, or physical training.

Outdoor jobs like park ranger or tour guide.

Event planning or organizing.

Firefighters or rescue workers.

Ace of Wands: Entrepreneur, startup founder, motivational speaker, fitness coach, personal trainer.

Two of Wands: Business strategist, project manager, travel agent, international consultant, import/export specialist.

Three of Wands: Sales representative, marketing manager, e-commerce entrepreneur, market researcher, international trade coordinator.

Four of Wands: Event planner, wedding coordinator, party organizer, festival manager, hospitality industry professional.

Five of Wands: Conflict resolution specialist, mediator, lawyer, debate coach, competitive sports coach.

Six of Wands: Public relations manager, spokesperson, social media influencer, motivational speaker, winning athlete.

Seven of Wands: Defense attorney, human rights activist, political campaigner, advocate, civil liberties lawyer.

Eight of Wands: Courier, delivery driver, airline pilot, travel blogger, expedition guide.

Nine of Wands: Security guard, bodyguard, soldier, endurance athlete, self-defense instructor.

Ten of Wands: Overworked entrepreneur, project manager, event organizer, professional organizer, heavy equipment operator.

Page of Wands: Assistant in a creative field, aspiring artist, intern in a startup, social media coordinator, apprentice.

Knight of Wands: Travel journalist, adventure tour guide, professional athlete, race car driver, stunt performer.

Queen of Wands: CEO, business owner, charismatic leader, life coach, influential speaker.

King of Wands: Executive manager, entrepreneur, leadership coach, consultant, director of a creative agency.

Cups:

Counseling, therapy, or social work.

Hospitality industry, including restaurant management and bartending.

Wedding planner or event coordinator.

Artistic fields like poetry, writing, or acting.

Healing professions such as nursing or holistic therapy.

Psychologist or counselor specializing in emotions and relationships.

Ace of Cups: Therapist, counselor, social worker, holistic healer, emotional support specialist.

Two of Cups: Marriage counselor, matchmaker, relationship coach, wedding planner, love psychic.

Three of Cups: Event organizer, party planner, celebratory event coordinator, community organizer.

Four of Cups: Meditation teacher, mindfulness coach, spiritual counselor, psychologist, therapist.

Five of Cups: Grief counselor, trauma therapist, hospice worker, emotional healing practitioner, bereavement support.

Six of Cups: Child psychologist, teacher, daycare worker, children's book author, pediatric nurse.

Seven of Cups: Creative writer, fantasy novelist, imaginative artist, dream analyst, visionary.

Eight of Cups: Travel blogger, adventure seeker, spiritual pilgrim, explorer, wanderlust photographer.

Nine of Cups: Life coach, happiness consultant, gratitude coach, self-help author, wellness retreat organizer.

Ten of Cups: Family therapist, marriage and family counselor, foster care advocate, wedding planner, family mediator.

Page of Cups: Creative writer, artist in training, intuitive healer, aspiring therapist, dream interpreter.

Knight of Cups: Actor, romantic poet, musician, art therapist, love and relationship coach.

Queen of Cups: Psychic reader, intuitive healer, counselor, compassionate caregiver, therapist.

King of Cups: Therapist, counselor, intuitive mentor, emotional intelligence trainer, psychologist.

Swords:

Legal professions like lawyers, judges, or law enforcement officers.

Journalists, reporters, or investigators.

IT specialists, computer programmers, or hackers.

Teachers or professors specializing in critical thinking or philosophy.

Military or defense-related careers.

Strategic planners or analysts.

Ace of Swords: Lawyer, judge, legal consultant, investigative journalist, strategic planner.

Two of Swords: Mediator, conflict resolution specialist, negotiator, diplomat, relationship counselor.

Three of Swords: Divorce lawyer, grief counselor, trauma therapist, emotional healer, heart surgeon.

Four of Swords: Rest and relaxation specialist, meditation teacher, spiritual retreat organizer, yoga instructor.

Five of Swords: Military strategist, competitive sports coach, lawyer specializing in litigation, debate coach.

Six of Swords: Travel agent, relocation consultant, therapist specializing in transitions, boat captain.

Seven of Swords: Private investigator, spy, intelligence analyst, cybersecurity expert, undercover agent.

Eight of Swords: Social justice lawyer, human rights advocate, disability rights activist, therapist specializing in limiting beliefs.

Nine of Swords: Insomnia specialist, anxiety therapist, nightmare counselor, sleep coach, mental health counselor.

Ten of Swords: Surgeon, coroner, forensic scientist, mortician, grief counselor.

Page of Swords: Researcher, journalist, fact-checker, apprentice in a legal field, investigative reporter.

Knight of Swords: Military officer, police officer, attorney, competitive fencer, conflict resolution specialist.

Queen of Swords: Judge, lawyer, critic, journalist, literary agent.

King of Swords: Judge, attorney, CEO, strategist, military general.

Pentacles:

Financial advisors or investment bankers.

Real estate agents or property developers.

Agriculture, farming, or gardening.

Architects, builders, or construction workers.

Conservationists or environmentalists.

Accountants or bookkeepers.

Ace of Pentacles: Financial advisor, investment banker, wealth manager, entrepreneur, luxury goods retailer.

Two of Pentacles: Financial analyst, accountant, bookkeeper, event planner, stock trader.

Three of Pentacles: Architect, contractor, project manager, teamwork facilitator, craftsman.

Four of Pentacles: Wealth manager, investor, financial planner, asset protection specialist, treasurer.

Five of Pentacles: Social worker, philanthropist, charity organizer, financial counselor, volunteer.

Six of Pentacles: Philanthropist, humanitarian worker, non-profit manager, social worker, charitable fundraiser.

Seven of Pentacles: Gardener, farmer, agricultural consultant, sustainability expert, botanist.

Eight of Pentacles: Craftsperson, artisan, apprentice, skilled tradesperson, technical trainer.

Nine of Pentacles: Luxury brand manager, independent business owner, successful entrepreneur, vineyard owner, art collector.

Ten of Pentacles: Real estate developer, property investor, family business owner, generational wealth manager, financial advisor.

Page of Pentacles: Intern, student, apprentice in a practical field, aspiring entrepreneur, entry-level employee.

Knight of Pentacles: Accountant, financial planner, farmer, skilled tradesperson, meticulous worker.

Queen of Pentacles: CEO, business owner, property developer, hospitality industry entrepreneur, financial advisor.

King of Pentacles: CEO, business mogul, successful investor, high-level executive, financial consultant.

(CC) AstroJulia Some Rights Reserved

#tarot #tarot tips #tarot meanings #divination #cards #witch #witchcraft #witchblr #astroblr #career #astrojulia #all about tarot #tarot witch #major arcana #minor arcana #tarot and career

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songsofnoble · 3 months

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i would like to promote matt dahan's radio-musical series, pulp musicals bc it is SORELY underappreciated. it features james tolbert, mariah rose faith, curt mega w other starkid members making guest appearances (kim whalen and jaime lynn beatty are featured in the second episode) and is based on a real lide event where a struggling new york newspaper began claiming their was proof of intelligent life and a civilization on the moon.

in the musical, the stratford twins, rose and samuel, are behind the plot, using famous astronomer john herschel's name within the lie to add more credibility, claiming the information comes from his journals. chaos ensues as everyone believes the lie and they end up digging themselves further into the mess as the newspaper samuel works for keeps wanting more stories from john herschel's journals leading to betrayals and ppl who they never expected to discover their lie discover it. and that's just in episode 1!

the songs and lyrics and music in general is gorgeous highly recommend.

#only learned about this when mariah posted a clip from i think episode three (which i haven't checked out yet) and it seemed intriguing #curt and mariah play love interests btw and they're actually rlly cute #pulp musicals #matt dahan #mariah rose faith #james tolbert #curt mega #kim whalen #jaime lyn beatty #you're better thinking of the episodes like seasons imo #i rlly think pulp musicals would work quite well as a book series or a tv show honestly

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renthari-from-telvanni · 5 months

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[ Memories ]

„ Ordinary people keep a journal. Sotha Sil decided to store his memories as star-data in an artificial astronomical matrix keyed to his philosophical musings on the structure of the Aurbis. Of course. ”

— Almalexia

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mindblowingscience · 1 month

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An international piece of research, led by the Instituto de Astrofísica de Canarias (IAC) has found clues to the nature of some of the brightest and hottest stars in our universe, called blue supergiants. Although these stars are commonly observed, their origin has been an old puzzle that has been debated for several decades. By simulating novel stellar models and analyzing a large data sample in the Large Magellanic Cloud, IAC researchers have found strong evidence that most blue supergiants may have formed from the merger of two stars bound in a binary system. The study is published in The Astrophysical Journal Letters.

#Science #Space #Astronomy #Physics #Astrophysics #Stars

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mysticstronomy · 2 months

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WHAT MAKES A BLACK HOLE GROW NEW STARS FROM??

Blog#382

Saturday, March 9th, 2024.

Welcome back,

When they are active, supermassive black holes play a crucial role in the way galaxies evolve. Until now, growth was thought to be triggered by the violent collision of two galaxies followed by their merger, however new research led by the University of Bath suggests galaxy mergers alone are not enough to fuel a black hole -- a reservoir of cold gas at the centre the host galaxy is needed too.

The new study, published this week in the journal Monthly Notices of the Royal Astronomical Society is believed to be the first to use machine learning to classify galaxy mergers with the specific aim of exploring the relationship between galaxy mergers, supermassive black-hole accretion and star formation. Until now, mergers were classified (often incorrectly) through human observation alone.

"When humans look for galaxy mergers, they don't always know what they are looking at and they use a lot of intuition to decide if a merger has happened," said Mathilda Avirett-Mackenzie, PhD student in the Department of Physics at the University of Bath and first author on the research paper. The study was a collaboration between partners from BiD4BEST (Big Data Applications for Black Hole Evolution Studies), whose Innovative Training Network provides doctorial training in the formation of supermassive black holes.

She added: "By training a machine to classify mergers, you get a much more truthful reading of what galaxies are actually doing."

Supermassive black holes are found in the centre of all massive galaxies (to give a sense of scale, the Milky Way, with around 200 billion stars, is only a medium-sized galaxy). These supersized black holes typically weigh between millions and billions of times the mass of our sun.

Through most of their lives, these black holes are quiescent, sitting quietly while matter orbits around them, and having little impact on the galaxy as a whole. But for brief phases in their lives (brief only on an astronomical scale, and most likely lasting millions to hundreds of millions of years), they use gravitation forces to draw large amounts of gas towards them (an event known as accretion), resulting in a bright disk that can outshine the entire galaxy.

It's these short phases of activity that are most important for galaxy evolution, as the massive amounts of energy released through accretion can impact how stars form in galaxies. For good reason then, establishing what causes a galaxy to move between its two states -- quiescent and star-forming -- is one of the greatest challenges in astrophysics.

"Determining the role of supermassive black holes in galaxy evolution is crucial in our studies of the universe," said Ms Avirett-Mackenzie.

Originally published www.sciencedaily.com

COMING UP!!

(Wednesday, March 13th, 2024)

"WHAT IS BEYOND THE EDGE OF THE SOLAR SYSTEM??"

#astronomy #outer space #alternate universe #astrophysics #universe #spacecraft #white universe #space #parallel universe #astrophotography

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typhlonectes · 21 days

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James Webb telescope confirms there is something seriously wrong with our understanding of the universe

Depending on where we look, the universe is expanding at different rates. Now, scientists using the James Webb and Hubble space telescopes have confirmed that the observation is not down to a measurement error.

Astronomers have used the James Webb and Hubble space telescopes to confirm one of the most troubling conundrums in all of physics — that the universe appears to be expanding at bafflingly different speeds depending on where we look. This problem, known as the Hubble Tension, has the potential to alter or even upend cosmology altogether. In 2019, measurements by the Hubble Space Telescope confirmed the puzzle was real; in 2023, even more precise measurements from the James Webb Space Telescope (JWST) cemented the discrepancy. Now, a triple-check by both telescopes working together appears to have put the possibility of any measurement error to bed for good. The study, published February 6 in the Astrophysical Journal Letters, suggests that there may be something seriously wrong with our understanding of the universe...

Read more: James Webb telescope confirms there is something seriously wrong with our understanding of the universe | Live Science

#space #space science #astronomy #physics #cosmology #science

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mumms-the-word · 24 days

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Shadow Curse Events Pt. 3

The first 40 days

Hello, friends, and welcome to the third and final installment of this little series about the Shadow Curse in BG3. Part 1 talked about Ketheric's descent into Sharran worship and how he built his Dark Justiciar army. Part 2 detailed the events of the war between the Harpers/druids and Ketheric's army, a bloodbath that culminated in Ketheric's supposed death and a high-cost victory for the Harpers and druids.

With Ketheric's dying breath, he utters a curse and the shadow curse takes full effect within hours. That's what this post is about. There are two journals that give us a day-by-day breakdown of the shadows as they roll outward from town, Olam's Journal and Oliver's Diary. Using these (plus other materials, naturally), I wanted to construct a kind of timeline for the first 40 days of the shadow curse as it slowly took over the landscape.

Quick cw: some descriptions of madness and implied sexual trauma from one note left behind by a Reithwin citizen

As always, long post ahead, under the cut!

———

Dear Diary, Day 1: Nothing ever happens in this town. I'm ready to go to the Gate. If Mother won't let me, I'll run away myself. She says my lungs are too weak for the smoke. But how am I living at all, when all I do is milk the rothe? [mumms' note: I imagine this diary entry by Oliver was written before the battle, but during the siege. I can't imagine him writing "nothing ever happens" when a battle is actively taking place.]

Let me set the stage. It is the third day of the battle between the Harper-druid army and Ketheric Thorm. The Harpers have already tried to surrender, only to be denied by Ketheric, who joins the battle himself. The death tolls are astronomical and the citizens of Reithwin are either cowering and trying to survive the battle that rages outside their doors or fighting as part of a volunteer force. The tides have turned in the Harpers' and druids' favor as reinforcements for Dark Justiciars inexplicably stop coming (thanks to the mason's infernal deal). At last, some lucky Harper or druid strikes the blow that finally fells Ketheric Thorm. Ketheric uses his last breath to utter a curse on the land, the actual words lost to time, and dies. Together with other Harpers and druids, Jaheira assists in dragging Ketheric's body from the battlefield and sealing it inside the Grand Mausoleum. But the damage has already been done.

It's day one of the shadow curse.

Day 2 of Darkness I stood calm as Ketheric uttered his final curse and then withered. As my fellow Harpers dragged his putrid corpse from the battlefield, I allowed myself to feel relief, even solace. A wrong had been righted, an evil thwarted. Victory had come - but I had yet to know its true cost. The darkness shrouded the land like a vast cloak. It began as a chill, as if the Claw of Winter had gripped us. Within hours, every breath was a dagger piercing my throat. I hungered for air like a wolf hungers for meat - yet I could still get my fill, thanks to my armour. Would that the men and women of Reithwin had been so well-equipped. One by one they fell, only to rise as shadows of themselves, intent on extinguishing all light, and all life. The shadows hang less heavy in this place. It still takes some effort to fill my lungs, but better to expend effort than to unite with darkness. My traps should keep me safe - or at least, safe enough.

Olam, an aasimar Harper who eventually fell victim to the shadow curse as he was trying to find ways to reverse it, is our best record for the first day. According to him, the first sign of the curse was a chill, as cold as the Claw of Winter, a reference to the winter month of Alturiak.

Months in Faerûn have two names, a sort of "official" name and a common name. The second month of the year, Alturiak, is commonly known as the Claw of Winter, a month of deep cold that sets in after Midwinter (the day right before Alturiak 1). Given that Ketheric's speech to his troops suggests they're preparing to face winter, and the fact that Thisobald's notes tell us that Ketheric was poisoned by the Harpers in Elient, the month that contains the Autumn Equinox, it's safe to suggest that the battle happened in late autumn. A sudden chill as cold as deep winter would be very alarming, especially accompanied by an unnatural darkness.

So, first comes the cold, so piercing and uncomfortable it makes it hard to breathe. Then comes the shadows, a darkness that settles over the town and begins to spread. If you're in armor, if you've trained your body to withstand magical and physical attacks, if you're resistant to any kind of damage, if you're one of the miraculous soldiers who hasn't been horribly wounded and weakened, you have half a chance to survive the initial shadows.

The untrained citizens of Reithwin don't have even that half-chance.

One by one they fall to the shadows. One by one they rise again as twisted, changed, ravenous undead, "intent to extinguish all light, all life." We've seen what the curse does ourselves to Harpers like Yonas, or to other living creatures like the hyena or the goblin near the mountain pass entrance. The Harpers and druids who believe that they can put battle behind them at last are now faced with a new enemy—the undead, shadow-cursed husks of innocent (and perhaps not so innocent) citizens.

Image: An armored arm covered by black and green shadow magic reaching out.

Not just citizens, either. The shadows soon claim Harpers and druids too. The shadows do not discriminate.

Halsin: Even in defeat, though, Ketheric turned to Shar. Not long after we sealed him away in his tomb, the shadow curse took hold. No one had seen the likes of it before. No one knew how to react…Then it started to claim all those within its reach. Those who had survived the battles now fell to the shadows - became part of the shadows. And worst of all…I lost contact with Thaniel. I wanted to try and find him, but we couldn’t stay. We would have all succumbed. When the Archdruid of the Grove - my predecessor - was seized by the curse, I had to lead the survivors to safety. That was my first day as Archdruid. An inauspicious beginning.

The Harpers and druids no doubt scatter, scrambling for light, caught flat-footed in a fight against the undead they must now kill, some of whom might even be their own allies, their own friends, and a darkness they can scarcely understand. As more and more people fall, more and more corpses reanimate. There's no use fighting. Their only real choice is to run.

Halsin, among the survivors, desperately tries to gather together druid survivors and rescue the wounded from the curse, going so far as to carry some on his back, according to unique dialogue with Jaheira. As they attempt to flee, the former Archdruid falls, seized by the shadows. Halsin is forced to leave him behind to ensure the survival of the other druids.

Halsin: It is an honour to see you again, High Harper. Jaheira: No need for titles. You may call me Jaheira, so long as you are content to be known as Halsin. And the honour is mine. Your stewardship of the Emerald Grove has made for something of a story among the circles. The apprentice who survived the shadow curse, and carried his masters home on his back. Who was raised their master in turn, and searches still for a way to save what was lost. [mumm's note: Halsin says he never met Jaheira, but this could be him being polite, or him referencing that he has seen Jaheira before, they've just never spoken or officially met.]

At the same time, he's lost contact with Thaniel. The spirit of the land has been pulled into the Shadowfell somehow by the onset of the curse as it spreads outward and begins to take over the landscape. Perhaps the Shadowfell claims others, as well, the moment the darkness falls over them, rather than transforming them into undead shadow corpses. We know this happens to Art, after all.

But Halsin doesn't have time to think about Thaniel, unfortunately. With the Archdruid dead, it is now his responsibility to look after the wounded and surviving druids and lead them to safety.

[This is an ancient notebook, whose ink is faded and pages are starting to crumble. It's not easy, but some words can still be made out.] Ketheric is finished, but it cost us the land. Darkness has fallen, corruption is everywhere. [...] ...chased by shadows, picking us off, druids and Harpers alike. [...] ...our wounded were safe, I returned, searching for survivors... [...] ...lost, but I found his shade. I put it to rest and took his glaive... [...] ...blade infused with shadow. I have locked it away, to serve as a reminder that even victory can taste bitter.

In the launch version of the game, the glaive Sorrow belonged to the old Archdruid. (In early access, it belonged to Halsin, but that is an entirely separate post.) Halsin's old notebook reveals the lengths he went to save the wounded, becoming the Grove's leader the very hour, the very minute that the old Archdruid succumbs to the curse. He doesn't stop to fight the Archdruid's shade. He must save whoever he can.

In town, others are trying to flee the curse as well. The first couple of days, it's all the citizens can do to stay ahead of the darkness and escape the shadows before they're taken. One person attempts to send word via a raven seeking help. The raven, too, succumbs to the curse.

[This letter is written on a scrap of paper. Blood and age have made it near illegible in parts.] HELP! A darkness has rolled into Reithwin, cutting us off on all sides. We’ve sent people through, but no one can make it more than a few steps before [the words are obscured by drops of blood.] This letter is our last hope. Send help - anyone, from anywhere, I beg of you. I will renounce our Lady Loss and kiss the Moonmaiden’s feet if that’s what it takes. Just don’t let the darkness take us.

It's nearing the end of the first day. Halsin has at last seen the wounded to some kind of safety and turns back, braving the shadows again to try and find the old Archdruid. He finds his shade and kills it, taking his glaive as a reminder, since the shadow-corrupted body must be left behind. With his duty at last done, Halsin departs the shadow-cursed lands to return to the Emerald Grove with the survivors. He does not return again until a century later.

———

Day 2 of the shadow curse.

Olam the Harper manages to secure something of a safe refuge in a hidden room of the House of Healing's morgue where the shadows hang less heavily. He sets up traps to deter shades and shadow-cursed zombies.

Citizens of Reithwin who haven't fled the curse on day one and are resilient enough to survive the first day are slowly succumbing, too. Some citizens seem to willingly give themselves to the shadow curse, or are taken entirely by surprise.

A couple on the roof of the House of Healing lay together, whispering poetry to one another as the darkness falls. Another couple lays curled up in their home, perhaps trying to hide from the shadows as the darkness presses against the doors and windows. Other citizens drag their feet, trying to pack up their lives and follow after more slowly. The result is the same for all of them. Death to the shadow curse, or the shades it creates from the dead. Their skeletal remains lay untouched for decades afterward.

———

Day 5 of the shadow curse.

Olam, sequestered inside the morgue, is simply trying to survive. The curse begins spreading outward, its borders expanding toward the outer reaches of the landscape.

Day 5 of Darkness The shadows ebb and wane. A torch flame is sometimes enough to burn them away, but no light can dispel the deepest of them. I called my familiar Corvin to my side, but he could scarcely take wing. Tomorrow I search, and not just for food and drink. I might find a scroll, or an artefact, or an arcane focus that can ward off this curse. Perhaps I might even find another survivor.

Olam is hopeful, but he is very likely the sole survivor of the shadow curse within the town itself. There are, however, survivors outside the town, some of whom are still trying to flee. Others, like Oliver and his mother, are forced to stay in their home as the shadows creep closer and closer.

———

Day 7 of the shadow curse.

Before Oliver held half of Thaniel's essence, he was a young boy (possibly a tiefling) on a rothé farm on the outskirts of Reithwin. He seems to have been born with or developed a chronic illness of some kind, as his mother worries about his lungs not being able to handle the smoke of Baldur's Gate (I assume this is a passing reference to some early industrialization of the city). But by day seven of his journal, the shadows have already started to spread outward toward his home.

Day 7: Ha, a strange fog is descending over our own town. Hasn't left in days. Getting hard to breathe. Mother is eating her words, saying we should head out to the city to stay for a while until it lifts. We go at dawn.

(I personally don't think the numbered days in Olam and Oliver's journals align, where Olam's Day 5 of darkness is also Oliver's Day 5 in his diary. I think it's more likely that they're offset by 2 or 3 days, with Oliver beginning his journal 2-3 days before Olam did, so Olam's Day 4/5 would be Oliver's Day 7, and so on. But for simplicity's sake, I'm just going to use both of their dates as if they were perfectly aligned.)

———

Day 8 of the shadow curse.

Oliver and his mother try to brave the shadows to head west to Baldur's Gate, but the shadow-cursed creatures are too dangerous. They turn around and take shelter in their home once more. They spend another several days protected from the curse, somehow.

I suspect it's Thaniel's lingering presence near the house that is saving them. But they couldn't possibly know that.

———

Day 14 of the shadow curse.

Oliver and his mother have given up hope for any kind of escape. The shadows are too dangerous. It's too late to leave.

Day 14: We tried to leave, but there are creatures from beyond the grave, skulking around the outskirts of our land. It's too late.

———

Day 18 of the shadow curse.

Everything is dead or undead. Everything except Olam, Oliver, Oliver's mother, and the animals they care for...for now. The town is still, as if suspended in time, but not quiet. Things stir in the darkness.

Day 18 of Darkness It's a particular loneliness, in these shadows. Corvin shows great affection when I call him, even as he suffers. Those few minutes are at least some comfort, for us both. It is remarkably still in here, and even stiller out there. I have found a few scrolls and books near the House of Healing, as well as some scattered artefacts, but they hold nothing for me. The only answers call out from within the House itself, where I dare not enter. I hear the moans of the anguished, the shouts of the cruel. There are those who make their home in the shadows, but I am no less alone for them.

Olam's hopes are dwindling. The shadows had taken the life of everything they've touched. Many shadow-cursed undead lie dormant, waiting for something to stir them back into action. Others have been reduced to shades and towering living shadows. Still others, like those inside the House of Healing, have been transformed. In particular, it seems as though the nurses, if not Malus himself, have become twisted undead versions of their living selves, something different than the average shadow-cursed corpse.

Because, you see, being transformed into a shadow-cursed being doesn't simply mean death and undeath. Not always. It also means a descent into pure madness as you lose your entire sense of self. Some victims choose to venture more into the darkness rather than fight it.

Shadow creature transformation is like this: I am standing in a tunnel with one way leading into light and the other leading into darkness. The tunnel glistens and stinks like a tube of rancid sausage. Everything slick with slime. I've got to get out of here. I know I do. But which way? Light or dark? Not day and night. The light is coming from the face of my grandfather, who used to squeeze my knee under the dining table with his bony fingers. His wizened, grinning face is the face life wears. It has flayed off his face and is wearing it now, lantern bright, in the light at that end of the tunnel. The dark though. The dark is absolute. No faces there. No old family trouble there. No bad dreams or memories there, well, well that's decided then isn't it! Sauntering now, striding now, running into the velvety black, embraced, bones snapping, body softening, silking, feeling the change, old life left behind, new life new me let's go yippee!

(There's also weird poetry about the shadows, if you're interested.)

The shadow curse is still Shar's darkness, and the allure of the dark's embrace is still there. Victims who lose their minds to the shadow curse as they turn into shadow creatures are drawn to this twisted idea of a new life (an un-life, really). As we see with Yonas, they're eager to bring others down with them.

Harper Yonas: There you are...come...join me...

Reithwin may be dead, and it may be still, but it isn't quiet.

———

Day 21 of the shadow curse.

In the outskirts, the shadows have possessed Oliver's rothé. They too grow mad, attacking one another and dying, only for the shadows to resurrect them again.

Day 21: The rothe are all possessed, knocking down their fence, battling and bashing one another to death... Dying then fighting again. The shadows are everyone... right outside our window. I can't see more than a few strides out. [mumm's note: I think "everyone" is supposed to be "everywhere" here.]

The darkness is only getting worse.

———

Day 26 of the shadow curse.

Nearly one full month since Ketheric's death. The shadows have grown darker and darker. In Oliver's cabin, he and his mother can only see a few strides beyond their windows. In town, where Olam continues to try and search for ways to end the shadow curse, the air has darkened from grey to black and grown so thick that breathing it in is like swallowing molasses or tar.

Day 26 of Darkness I called on Corvin yet again, but I cannot bear his torment. Nor can I bear my own. Grey has turned almost to black, and the air might as well be molasses or tar, so hard as it is to choke down. 'All beings should walk free of fear', I was taught. Oh, if only were I granted such a fine fate.

This is the last entry in Olam's journal. After days of trying to break the shadow curse, experimenting with various spells to push back the darkness or dispel the magic, after days of him and his bird familiar, Corvin, being the only living things he has encountered since the onset of the curse, Olam finally succumbs to the shadows. Perhaps he chooses to end his own life, or perhaps the shadows have crept into the morgue and at last killed him. Either way, his body, tainted and ruined by necrotic magic, remains sealed in his morgue hideaway for another century.

———

Day 28 of the shadow curse.

There are only two people still living in the midst of the shadows. Oliver and his mother remain unaffected by the curse, so long as they stay within their home. Oliver has no idea why the curse does not push into their house—it certainly has no issue creeping into every other home in and around town.

But I suspect Thaniel is at work. Given that Thaniel's spirit was torn in half by the shadow curse, perhaps the part that lay behind took refuge in Oliver's home. Perhaps that half is already in Oliver himself.

But Oliver grows restless. Though the curse has yet to take them, living with it is not easy. His weak lungs can't handle the shadow-thick air, even if it does not corrupt him immediately. He begins to contemplate death.

Day 28: I'm not dead yet. But I'm going to die here, aren't I? I can hardly breathe. Why does it not get into our house? Why doesn't the curse take us already. Day 35: I can't stand this. I've been trying to write a memoir of myself but it's still no good. I'm too weak to pen fine words. I am going to die unremembered, be what may. It's getting pointless to cower in here. There is nothing we can do about this all-encroaching dark. Tomorrow, I will walk out into the fog, and I will laugh. With love, a farmhand, forever to be unknown.

———

Day 35 of the shadow curse.

Olam is dead. Everyone in town is dead. Most people in the outskirts are dead. Except for Oliver, and perhaps his mother, and even Oliver can no longer handle the loneliness and despair of the shadow curse. Oliver plans to leave the safety of his home and give in to the shadows, rather than die a much slower death as the shadows continue to creep in.

———

Day 36 of the shadow curse.

Oliver opens his door and walks out into the dark fog of the curse. Some flowers still bloom, untouched by the curse or the shadows, just outside his doorstep. The corpses of the rothé lie inert in the darkness, having died twice over days before. Oliver likely doesn't linger on either detail. It only takes a few strides for the darkness to envelop him.

It only takes moments for it to change him.

Oliver as he was in life is gone, taken by the shadow curse. But some vestige of Thaniel keeps him alive, keeps them both alive. But the shadows have already done their damage.

Oliver remains near his home as the years pass, his laughter and his games turning ever deadlier as the curse strengthens and grows.

———

Day 39 of the shadow curse.

Halsin and the other druids have long since returned to the Emerald Grove. The mantel of leadership weighs heavy on his shoulders. He has sealed away the old Archdruid's glaive, tainted as it is with shadow magic, and begins to turn his attention to leading the Grove. A task he never asked for, and doesn't feel he deserves.

Jaheira has moved on to other adventures, working independently or with other Harpers. It will be another several decades before duty calls her back into the shadow-cursed lands, back to the site where she fought to maintain balance and put an end to a corrupted Sharran general.

The town of Reithwin and the surrounding landscape is dead. Dead, but not quiet. The shadows sink into the land itself, twisting the trees, slowly cracking the very earth apart. Shadows continue to stir, corrupting everything they touch. The unlucky undead that are not granted blissful oblivion shamble among the ruins of the town, between the remains of the battle. Their actions are twisted recreations of their living days, as nurses or as patrons of the Waning Moon. Their minds are all but obliterated.

The town settles into a pattern of hungry shadows on the hunt and undead corpses shuffling mindlessly through the motions. This pattern will remain undisturbed for a century or more.

———

Day 40 of the shadow curse.

Inside the Grand Mausoleum, behind the sigil-sealed doors, the crypts of the dead are not as still and silent as they should be. Something, someone moves in the darkness.

Ketheric Thorm, pulled back into the land of the living, stands at the foot of his daughter's sarcophagus. He wants to forget. He wants the darkness to swallow him whole. But it does not.

A bloated, fleshy hand reaches out in the darkness, and Ketheric hears an all too familiar voice, deep and resonant with dark magic.

"Let us refocus our efforts, General. In here, we have everything we need to bring her back. It will only take time."

Ketheric, having lost everything, agrees.

———

Okay, so maybe Day 40 was just me guessing/wanting to get creative. I believe Ketheric probably woke up, since he's still functionally immortal thanks to Aylin, relatively soon after the shadow curse was unleashed. But because he was sealed in the mausoleum by the Harpers and druids, he must have spent the better part of a few years, maybe even a few decades, trying to gather the strength to blow open the doors and leave.

He's been defeated, and Shar has likely withdrawn her blessings on him. His only power now is his immortality (probably). We know he doesn't build an army again until a century later, when he does so under Myrkul's command. So I imagine he probably spends many decades in the mausoleum, trying to forget, or (failing that) trying to resurrect his daughter.

Forgetting evades me in this infinite darkness. Balthazar is my own source of the barest comfort - the thought that, perhaps, she might be brought back to me. If oblivion can fail, what defence have we against death? None except its mastery. Balthazar's words have never felt more promising.

Somehow Balthazar finds him. Perhaps Balthazar was sealed inside the mausoleum too. But Balthazar promises to find a way to restore the one thing Ketheric wants. Ketheric doesn't desire vengeance. Ketheric doesn't want another army. Ketheric wants Isobel. And Balthazar, a powerful necromancer, believes he can deliver.

So the experiments begin. And fail. And fail. Thisobald, Gerringothe, Malus. The Thorm family members rise again, except they're twisted, grotesque, a little mad. Not how Ketheric wants Isobel to be. But they keep trying. Until at last, nearly a century after his defeat, after a century of struggling to forget and fall into oblivion, ignored by Shar, Ketheric turns to Myrkul. He agrees to become Myrkul's Chosen and do his bidding, in exchange for the one thing he wants most.

Isobel.

Melodia would understand, if she knew my aim. She too, I believe, would have turned to Myrkul under such conditions as these. Our darling will live again. What kind of man would I be if I didn't raze the world entire for her sake?

Ketheric at last renounces Shar to pledge himself to Myrkul. And Myrkul, unlike Shar, keeps his promise. The death that began the spiral into Sharran zealotry, that led to the shadow curse itself, is finally reversed.

After more than a century of death, Isobel wakes up.

———

So ends the three-part series about the shadow curse. What a ride. I'm so fascinated by this entire act/history because it feels like diving into war history or something. So thanks for following, if you followed all three parts!! Let me know what other deep dives you want me to do!

Tags for those who wanted an update! @fingons-rad-harp @stuffforthestash @cakenpiewhyohmy

#bg3 #bg3 discourse #bg3 meta #bg3 critical #halsin #halsin silverbough #jaheira #ketheric thorm #deep dive #long post #super long post #someone tell me why this was the easiest one to write

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bringthekaos · 2 months

Note

Jayce accidentally taking Viktor's pain meds and 47 minutes later he is zoned out to the next plane of existence like ( °__°)

I can definitely see this happening, in the early days before they’ve really cemented each other’s routines and patterns. Jayce keeps some mild painkillers in the lab for his headaches (you know, the ones he gets because he stays up until 3am and drinks exclusively coffee). They’ve got a big deadline coming up, so they’ve been going going going, pretty much nonstop for several days—switching off dozing on the cot in the corner for an hour or two here and there, and then getting right back to work.

Jayce gets one of his headaches late one afternoon, and in his sleep-deprived delirium, he just blindly reaches for the bottle on the desk and pops one dry. If he were more alert, he might have noticed the unfamiliar shape, the texture which is much grainier than it should be. But as it is, he just gets back to work…

For about half an hour, when the words on the chalkboard start to double up, and his hand is so tingly he keeps dropping the chalk. He takes a step back, thinking maybe it’s just the sleep deprivation finally catching up to him, but this feels… different. He feels drunk and disoriented, and he’s definitely not going to get any work done like this. So he slurs a quick “m’gunna take a break,” and slinks over to his chair, plopping down in it with not an ounce of grace.

And within ten minutes, he’s in the fucking stratosphere.

Viktor doesn’t immediately notice, as he just kept working when Jayce said he was taking a break. But when he posits a question and receives a suspiciously cat-like sound in return, he spins around and finds Jayce poured over his chair like a being of far fewer bones.

And it hits him—his eyes dart to Jayce’s desk, where Viktor realizes he accidentally set down his bottle of painkillers when last he took them.

First he lets loose the equivalent of George Carlin’s seven dirty words you can’t say on television in his native tongue, then he gets to work—he fetches Jayce a glass of water and forces him to sit up and drink at least half of it. He wets a washrag and runs it over Jayce’s forehead and the back of his neck. And after an astronomical amount of struggle, he gets Jayce onto his feet and guides him, uncoordinated and stumbling over to the cot, apologizing profusely the whole way, even though he knows Jayce is tripping balls and likely won’t remember a thing Viktor is saying. But he still apologizes, because he feels awful—this is his fault, he set his bottle down on the wrong desk in his exhaustion.

Viktor ends up having to finish a majority of the presentation on his own, while Jayce recovers. He sleeps a little of it off, but he also spends a decent amount of time talking absolute gibberish and writing several pages of nonsense in his journal. But eventually it starts to wear off, and Jayce slowly gets back to work.

They both learn a lot from the experience—namely to be more vigilant with where they set things, and what they’re picking up. But Jayce also learns a lot about his partner—he now understands why Viktor has to take a small break about an hour after he takes his medication, why he gets sluggish and lethargic. He also realizes why Viktor typically gets a little quiet and unresponsive in that time—his brain is fighting the fog, but it can only fight one battle at a time.

So he vows to make a routine of it—taking breaks when Viktor does, giving him some peace and quiet for a few minutes as he levels out. And eventually, it’s a story they can laugh at—reminiscing on those early days when that practiced waltz around each other in the lab was more like a toddler dancing on their father’s feet. It’s also when Viktor starts teasing him about being a lightweight, and that’s a joke that survives well into their divorce era.

#arcane #jayvik #Jayce talis #arcane Jayce #arcane viktor #Viktor arcane #the ol’ drug mixup #lab safety who’s she?#asks #ace answers

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theatrum-tenebrarum · 4 months

Text

I wanted to present you with my magickal, astronomical and folkloric commonplace notebook for 2024, which is going to be 'La Soleil' bullet journal, by Notebook Therapy! ☀️🔮

I was torn between 'La Soleil' and La Luna, the one with the black cover, but ultimately decided to go with the Sun one as I already have a black journal from NT (Moonlit Spell one), and as the Sun symbol is better suited as an expression of what I am after in my life and in my spirituality. This journal has a 2024 Moon phases calendar, which is very useful. It looks very luxurious and I feel like a Master Alchemist while jotting down the things I research and the things I will be referring back to 😁

#bujo #bullet journal #journaling #journal #commonplacing #commonplace journal #commonplace book #witchy things #occultist #occultism #alchemy #folklore #folklorist #notebook therapy #magick

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citrustan · 1 year

Text

for what it's worth [1/4] (jjk)

pairing: jeon jungkook x reader

genre: angst, fluff (this comes in a bit later), light smut, college student!reader x crush!jungkook

summary: you make an awful revelation about your crush of two years.

word count: 3k

warnings: none! except for the fact that this might read a teeny tiny bit creepy to some.

note: hello, here is me trying to give you this story before i scrap it because who knows? maybe some of you might not hate it! i need to edit it a little more but that happens later :) please tell me what you think! don't be silent! even if you think it's bad, i'd really love to know about it!

1 - 2 - 3 - 4

“You know, this may sound delusional but I think he’s kind of into me,” you blush, hiding half of your blushing face behind your fingers.

“Oh?” Jia smiles at you.

“Yeah, I mean, I think so?”

“What makes you say that?” Jia tilts her head, asking out of curiosity.

“Well, during the whole ‘Antonio is homosexual’ discourse, he sided with me and he sat next to me for the third time this week--” you pause to take a sip out of your cranberry and lychee juice box, “And he drew in my journal. Roses and bunnies. There’s nothing he can’t do.”

Jia reached forward to play with your braided hair, “_____, is he, like, single?”

Anxiously biting at the paper straw that the café gave you, your response was immediate.

“I think so. Nothing on his social media indicates that he’s, you know, not single. He barely posts!” you pout. “Jungkook’s so pretty, he could easily be a model. Super photogenic.”

“Hm, that’s true.” Jia bit her lip. “But what if he was dating someone? It would change things for you,” - “I mean, yeah sure, but I still think I want to confess when I have the chance to.”

“Even if he wasn’t single? Isn’t that kind of an asshole move?” Jia snapped.

Your eyes momentarily widen at her sudden outburst. What had gotten into her?

You grimace at her. “Um, yes. I wouldn’t-” you shrug, “if he has a girlfriend, I will not try anything, of course. But he doesn’t.”

Jia gave you a pointed look, “It was just hypothetical.”

“I know.” You frown.

It’s been a while since you first set your eyes on Jeon Jungkook. But never has the thought of him having a girlfriend ever crossed your mind. He just seemed like a solo rider. It felt safe to crush on him.

The first time you laid your eyes on Jungkook was at a mutual friend’s freshman mixer. You’d like to think you hit it off but couldn’t figure out how to proceed, with your schedules overlapping. Neither of you made the effort to switch around or make it work. So, you don’t feel too bad about it. You have never really crossed paths after that before he was out in the same class as you this semester.

Most people know him as the secret weapon of the music theory and software development thingy departments. He’s easily the most beautiful man on campus and his smarts and personality somehow match up.

You’re pretty sure if this was some shitty, unoriginal, K-drama, he could be the perfect second lead who never gets the girl he wants.

Naturally, after the night of the mixer, you couldn’t help but garner a small, minuscule, almost insignificant crush on the man; which has grown astronomically since then.

You can’t seem to understand what made Jia even ask you something like that. Unless---

“Why would you ask me that out of nowhere? Have you heard otherwise?” You suddenly interrogate her, startling her. She visibly flinches.

“What? No.” You hear her scoff. “I just realised we never discussed it before, ever.”

She laughed it off while you stared at her, unconvinced.

“I told you. Hypothetical.” She reminds you after taking note of your curious and somewhat frazzled state.

Jia was usually never interested in anything you had to say about Jungkook.

Although, you’re able to catch on to some cues slowly. Jia gets annoyed when you blabber about Jungkook. It’s understandable though. You speak of him almost every single day. If Jia were to gush about someone to you the same way, you couldn’t promise you’d receive it any better than she does.

Attempting to change the subject, you offer her a bite of your red velvet pastry, “I think they’ve stopped using the off-brand cream cheese.”

She opens her mouth, waiting for you to feed her.

You spoon a proper amount of cake to icing ratio and wave it in front of her nose.

“It does smell better,” she hums with a pleased expression on her face. “But, the overly sweet cake and bitter matcha combo was charming in its own way.”

An animated, pink, heart-shaped light bulb goes off in your head.

“Do you think Jungkook would like it if I brought him matcha or another drink? It’s a… you know, a gesture. Might put me on his radar.”

So much for wanting to stop discussing him.

You stare at her, eagerly waiting for her take on your little idea.

She snickered, but you swore it could be mistaken for a scoff, “Just leave him be.”

You quiet down but internally make a note to yourself to buy two cranberry lychee juice boxes instead of one tomorrow. Boys like cranberry, right?

Recently, you’ve been finding Jia more irritable. Not just when you blab about some guy but even in general. You swore you could feel her distancing herself from you and that’s a chance you don’t want to take.

Jia isn’t the only one on the receiving end of your love-foolish chatter.

By now, you’ve most definitely discussed it with almost every friend of yours, excluding the mutual ones you share with Jungkook. Even the friends who don’t go to the same university as you know of your crush on Jungkook. Although, they’re a tad more receptive to your endless chatter than Jia.

It’s embarrassing only if you really, really think about it. But, you generally brush the humiliation off as a secondary, less important issue.

Jia and your relationship started and ended right where it began--- at university. She’s your only friend in university with whom you share most of your classes, precisely six out of nine in total.

During your first year, you decided to stick together out of convenience, sharing a fashion designing and styling major and whatnot. It’s easier to latch onto each other when you’re expected to work in a group than find someone new and socialize at this level. The competition is pretty cutthroat, you wouldn’t want to risk working alongside someone you have no chemistry with. It’s too late for experimentation.

Jia, unlike you, lives off-campus and her bus arrives almost twenty minutes before your college shuttle that goes directly from the cafe to your dorm gate. So, you accompany her to the bus station and wander off for a while.

Remembering to run a small errand, you stop at a stationary store to buy ribbons and envelopes. Just in case.

It was a fifteen-minute walk to the store and back. You swing your fluffy, white bag and trot to your favourite place within a five-mile radius of your campus.

You liked to envision your relationships. It’s most certainly not healthy but Jungkook is just oh, so dreamy, you couldn’t help it even if you tried.

You stare off into the sky, daydreaming of your non-existent relationship with him.

You would write him love notes and letters frequently and decorate them with fresh, red, or pink lipstick stain kisses, maybe a few doodles and stickers as well. And when he’d buy you flowers, you’d do your best to dry them and preserve them so that you can look back at your relationship and swoon.

Maybe he’d take you to watch plays or concerts or maybe he’s the type to win you a stuffed toy at the carnival or to dress up for a theme party. And you could save the tickets and wristbands from those events.

You can’t even bear the thought of actually being able to go to a regular college party with him, being his date, the one who gets to dance on him, hold him and kiss him--- that’d disappoint quite a lot of people, you reckon. He is well-liked. A tiny bit private too. Maybe you could be his little secret. The thought of being his secret girlfriend turns you redder than a plum. Imagining yourself being his anything makes your heart pump blood twice as hard as the normal rate.

“Hey?”

Sigh.

“_____?”

Involuntarily, you respond to your name being called, “Huh?”

“Hey, you’re holding up the line.”

Your eyes focus on the familiar-faced cashier. An embarrassed giggle escapes your lips. You quietly apologised to the customers behind you.

“Joon. Hi, sorry. Spaced out.” You blush. As if he knows what you’re thinking about, he smiles fondly, “I don’t know if it’s cute or creepy that you think of him this often.”

Furrowing your brows, “It’s innocent! I’m not, like, harassing him or sexualizing him or anything.”

Namjoon scans your ribbons and the packet of off-white envelopes, “I’m only messing with you, cloud.”

You hum knowingly. “See you in class.”

You wave him off.

'Cloud' is one of the nicknames lovingly given to you by your seniors, Namjoon and Yoongi.

Yoongi says that you think miles ahead and higher than anyone else he knows and Namjoon agrees. But, you’ve always thought it was because you’ve got your head up in the clouds most of the time. It’s like a permanent state of consciousness. It is your only indulgence. Time goes by way too fast, you’re busy all the time. The only ‘escape’ is your silly little daydreams.

While people find your crush on Jungkook cute, sometimes you can’t help but put yourself in his shoes.

You wouldn’t want someone like you crushing on you, so why would he? It’s one of the things that has stopped you from actually asking him out, or talking to him at all in the past.

Now, on the other hand, you’re nearing the end of the semester and the beginning of your winter break. Soon, you’ll have all the time in the world.

This time, you refuse to get too ahead of yourself and fantasize about your prementioned relationship. Perhaps, it’s ambitious or even egoistical to call it a premonition.

You’re on your way back to the shuttle pick up point when you notice another oddly familiar figure.

Jungkook!

You shake your nerves and walk as casually as you possibly can, to where he stood.

Secretly clearing your throat, you greet him with a shy smile, “Hi.”

When he doesn’t respond, you debate on shifting even closer, but that would be an awkward move and a serious invasion of his personal space. His dark hoodie seemed to interfere with his peripheral vision, too.

So, you tap him gently on the arm. His head swiftly faces yours, making you take a step or two back.

“Hi,” You owlishly stare at him.

Jungkook scrunches his brows, a little embarrassed that he doesn’t recognise you.

“Hey… how are you?” He recovers. “Good! A little cold.” You smile.

It smelt like snow, but you wouldn’t want to creep him out with your odd senses.

Where did he know you from? He’s positive he has seen you before.

“Right, yeah. It smells like snow,” he responds.

t that, your mouth almost drops open. That’s what you were going to say too!

Your enthusiasm shows as you explain, “It does! I thought I’d scare you if I said something like that.”

The corners of Jungkook’s eyes crinkle, complimenting the huge smile that adorned his face.

“I’m Jungkook. Or JK. What’s your name?”

Oh?

Ow, you internally clench your heart.

Your face momentarily falls deep down into the ground, but you almost instantaneously pick it right back up.

The object of your secret affection doesn’t :) even :) know :) you.

“_____.” You shyly brush your hair off your shoulder to your back, “We’re in literary theory studies with-” - “Carmichael? Right! You’re Jia’s _____.”

You falter but register what he just said to you.

Whose what now?

He nods, “I knew I saw your face before! I remember your elocution thing about Woolf. It left a mark on me!” He pats you on the shoulder. Like you would a child.

But, more importantly, Jia’s _____?

You knew the girl had godly looks and an angelic personality, but- “Hey, is everything okay? I swear I meant it in the best way possible. I didn’t have much interest in literature. But ever since that speech, I’ve been focusing more on figuring out books by myself rather than depending on what the author tries to convey. It’s fun to be rebellious.” Jungkook elaborates when he sees your eyes dim.

You fail to register his compliments for a bit. A million thoughts are racing in your mind at thousands of miles an hour.

“_____?” Jungkook slightly bends his knees to get a better look at you.

“Mhm, right. The correct term is intentional fallacy,” you mutter with a ghost of a smile. “And, thanks.”

Although Jungkook’s a little confused, he nods anyway. “Yeah! I-”

Tilting your head to the side, you blurt, “How do you know Jia?”

Jungkook stares at you.

“Sorry, I mean, I don’t know. She has never… mentioned you before?” you offer.

“Oh. Well, I’m- Jia’s my girlfriend. She has talked about you a few times. Enough to know you’re good friends,” he blushes.

“Oh!” You squeak.

You clutched the bag of accessories tighter. You’re sure your nails have made little, crescent injunctions on your palm because of how tightly you gripped the handle.

“Yeah. She didn’t tell you it was me…?” Jungkook was starting to look worried.

“Huh? No, yeah.” You nervously laugh, “I must’ve glossed over it, I mean- you know.”

You’ve never stuttered so hard in your entire twenty years of living.

“Actually, yes, I believe she did talk about you. The- uh, the candles?” You suddenly, vaguely remembered Jia talking about making candles with an ‘almost boyfriend’ friend.

Talk about quick reflexes.

Just like that, Jungkook lets out a sigh of relief, “Oh, good! You looked like you were about to start crying. Because- well, she tells me about this girl she's friends with who has some kind of a creepy, schoolgirl crush on me or something. And for a hot second, I thought that’d be you.”

You raised a brow. Way too many revelations are being made against your will. And your mind is empty. Null. Nada. Not a thought in that pretty little head of yours.

“Yeah. I know it sounds strange, turns out I don’t even know this girl.” Jungkook looked down at his phone, “The bus is later than usual.”

It’s hard to make sense of everything. Why would he suddenly assume you were the girl even though you’re Jia’s friend?

You press your lips together. “Do you think it’s creepy?”

“The- what?” He looks up from his phone, with his full attention on you.

“The girl. Who crushes on you or whatever.” You reiterate, “Do you find that creepy?”

Jungkook pauses. He tilted his head from side to side, deep in thought.

“Honestly?” He leans in closer to you and raises a brow, “Maybe a little. I mean, I don’t even know her. But, Jia does. They’re friends. Then again, maybe, creepy is an overstatement.”

You hum and stare at your feet.

Sadness and cold do not go well together. This time, actual tears threaten to slide down your cheeks. You shift your weight from one foot to another.

“Why’d you ask?” Jungkook senses a shift in mood.

“Oh, just out of curiosity.” You flash him a small smile. It didn’t reach your eyes. Jungkook slowly nods and goes back to checking his phone for updates.

Part of you wants to admit to him that it was you because suddenly, Jia’s questions from earlier that day made sense.

But then, you don’t want him to think of you as some creepy girl with a creepy crush.

You weren’t creepy.

People would’ve told you off if that were to be the case. They mostly encouraged you or at least didn’t stop you.

With the exception of Jia, of course. Even then, she wasn’t entirely vocal about it.

Is it pity or sadism?

Was everyone hiding this from you? Did everyone but you know about it?

You doubt that Sieun, a mutual friend of yours and Jia, would keep something like this from you if she knew.

But then again, you never expected Jia to turn out to be so… sneaky.

Your sadness outweighs your embarrassment.

“Are you waiting for the shuttle too?” he questions you with a raised brow.

You open your mouth for a second or two before settling on nodding.

“I don’t think the bus will get here anytime soon. It’s already snowed in on the fifth.” Jungkook turns the bright screen towards you. “We can Uber out of here before the snow sets in here. Unless you want to wait?”

“Sure,” you plainly reply.

“Is that a yes to the waiting or?” Jungkook chuckled.

“No. No more waiting. Uber’s good.” you softly spoke.

“Great, I’m on it!” He affirms.

It’s still unsettling for you to have no natural, outward reaction to indirectly being called a creep by someone you admired for so long.

Suddenly, your embarrassment skyrockets.

You can’t comprehend your emotions; you feel like you’ve been punched in the throat with a stone brick.

There are dead butterflies in your tummy--- moths. The wind feels colder, and you shudder.

You stare at the chipped nail polish on your thumb.

A warm jacket suddenly dons on your shoulders. “You need it way more than I do.” Jungkook frowns, “Are you okay?”

You abruptly turn to him, thanking him gently for his jacket, “I was just cold.”

You softly scoff, “You’re awfully kind.”

Jungkook pats you on the shoulder before he says, “Any friend of my girlfriend is a friend of mine! Plus, you’re cute.”

He’s really cheesy. Even though the single mention of Jia struck very thick, large needles in your tummy, you couldn’t help but smile at his words.

Au contraire to your expression, for the first time in a while, you’re not in the clouds but the complete opposite--- grounded, perhaps a more accurate term would be ‘devastated’. You’re absolutely, completely floored. Underground. Downright stumped. Confused. Definitely angry.

You vowed to push your emotions away for the duration of your travel with Jungkook.

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