#at this point im just in a huge amount of pain and i dont know if its getting better or worse

[zerolynx716]

kisematsu makes me sooooo emo

yk when in the kaijo vs touou match (dont talk about the kasamatsu crying scene after that okay my heart has broken over it enough times) kise couldnt get up from the court floor because his legs were exhausted from copying aomine ,,, and kasamatsu walked to him and kise looked up at him and said “senpai… im so sorry…” and kasamatsu just picked him up, draped his arm over his shoulder to help him up and said “you did well, kise”

it hurts so much more cuz i get what theyre going thru. the euphoria from winning any sports game is unmatched but that means the misery when you lose is equally unmatched. its so bad

not being able to get up from the court, walking with a limp, looking up at your senior and feeling this huge pang of guilt that you couldnt win for them. its terrible

kise wanted to win FOR kasamatsu. he didnt want him to go through that feeling of loss. but the team lost anyway and he felt horrible because for so long the responsibility of the team winning has been on his shoulders. he was always expected to bring the team to victory and he is legit USED TO BEING HUMILIATED for it if he doesnt. he admits that to a fault he doesnt know how to pace himself. he doesnt know when too much is too much and he overexerts himself on a regular basis

but kasamatsu was ALWAYS there to help him. to tell him that if kise ever needed help making a decision w/ training he could go to kasamatsu. that kise didn’t need to bear the burden of success anymore

im never gonna stfu about this bro the ONLY reason kise developed and improved as much as he did is BECAUSE of kasamatsu. kasamatsu saw what teiko did to him the amount of pain kise didnt know he was bearing and he pulled out all the stops to make sure that kise would get better

he took kise to basketball matches with him. he took his junior OVER his classmates that are more experienced and would have had better insights but no. he did it so he could have more time with kise and si that kise could learn more about the game too. to teach him new things and new team strategies that he couldnt learn at teiko because THEY WERENT A TEAM

kasamatsu is one hell of a leader an amazing friend. he is exactly what a leader should be. hes passionate and motivating, he never EVER gives up. he has amazing mental fortitude and he is always open to teaching people new things especially to kise. he knew that kise was being disrespectful because that was all he knew how to do. kise didnt know what it was like to not be at the center of attention and not better than everyone and not singled out because of his talent. kasamatsu didnt let that go unnoticed. he put his foot down but he didnt do it aggressively. he was rational and respectful. he used all the right words

he knew there was something in kise. sure he was a great player but he had the potential to be a better PERSON. and kasamatsu wasnt gonna give up on him just because kise had a rough start

for so many years kise was alone. he never rlly had anyone close to him or anyone that wanted to help him. in that scene where he was in the floor and unable to get up? the animators made it a point to emphasize that he was ALONE. but a few seconds later, there was someones hand outreached. kasamatsu looked at him. helped him up. patted his head. praised him, comforted him

kise wasn’t alone anymore. he had someone that cared about him. an entire TEAM that cared about him

auauhyfhudhsh6(a ahhahwjjak im so insane about them im so sorry this will happen again

#anime #knb #kuroko no basket #kise ryouta #kasamatsu yukio #kise x kasamatsu

[hyunjinspark]

hiii !! i wanted to leave my comments on chap 17 a few days ago but im so stressed w my life i didnt have time to sit down and digest this chapter properly lolz but either way im here now! And my feelings changed .

i think i've mentioned in my last ask that i couldnt get mad at hyunjin. well now i can 😭😭 i think the way you narrated yns feelings really hit home for me - realizing she was currently living her dream life and not being able to feel anything besides pain really got to me. even though hyunjin doesnt realize the amount of hurt he caused, he still managed to ruin (at least for a while) something that is such a huge deal in her life. i do kinda feel sorry for hyunjin too, he seem so clueless about the damage he causes, but its really hard reading how empty yn feels when there are so many good things happening in her life

im so incredibly proud of yn for standing up for herself!!! she really matured a lot, and i think she's starting to respect herself and stand her ground more. i wonder whats gonna happen when she reaches her breaking point w hyunjin tbh.. i hope she does, though. he needs to realize how neglectful hes been w her

also, i really dont know my opinion on jeonghan yet. im not his biggest fan, but i don't really dislike him either. i do think hes maybe a bit to eager to make out w yn at any opportunity he has, but i cant blame him for that LMAO i just dont trust him yet. i hope he doesnt do anything weird.. he's definitely on my watch 👁️

and i think this might be a really hot take, but i dont know how i feel about kairi and bang chan... things could go SO wrong and when it comes to u writing angst.. im really worried ab where this is gonna lead us 😭 honestly idek how i want things to go for them.. ofc i would love if they got back together, but that doesn't really seem possible. u keep getting me hooked on this story jade omg 😭 i srsly have NO idea how this is gonna go and im honestly kinda worried ab finding out..

and also i hope nothing happens between yn and hyunjin in the next chapter🥲 unless they have a srs conversation and hyunjin apologizes.. honestly idek what he could do to make it up to yn at this point. but still, im always rooting for them. and i trust hyunjin's feelings towards yn. and i trust ur ability to turn really tragic storylines into really pretty love stories

but yea ! hoping and praying my good sister yn will not fold in chap 18 🫡 i love her i just want her to be happy and appreciated :((

alsoo right where you left me is my favorite taylor song ever 🥲🥲 the title alone made me flinch before i even started reading the chapter lmao

anywayyysss !! hope u have a lovely lovely day, pretty! im always rooting for u!

🩸

its been a while ! im surprised your feelings changed but that makes sense, yn’s really struggling and hyunjin probably has no clue how much :/ its frustrating, and her breaking point is imminent tbh !!

i think a lot of people share your opinion on jeonghan 👀 it could go either way,,,,and same for kairi and chan 💔

anyway, i love reading your thoughts !! thanks for sending them in. ☺️

#star lost with you #🩸 anon

[woolywoofs]

I wanted to post a little update. And ask for a little help, again (paypal posted below, please dont feel pressured! you and your needs come first always).

Moppa and I are still grieving Skvetta, but we are managing now. She can be left alone now without panicking and she no longer searched for her in the yard.

I had my tonsils taken out last friday, on my birthday lol. Surgery itself went well, but beforehand did not. My IV infiltrated and all of the meds to calm me down and put me to sleep just went into my soft tissue. It was extremely painful and I started to have a panic attack on the table because of it + the oxygen mask makes me feel like im suffocating (i know it doesnt make sense haha). All hands on deck after that and I had 3 people on me at once sticking me trying to get IVs in me but my veins just kept breaking. It was actual hell and felt like forever.

Recovery has been a hot mess honestly. The first 3 days were fine and since then its been reaaal bad. The ear, throat and tongue pain is unreal. I am drugged out of my mind because pain/stress is a huge seizure trigger for me, but at this point it is not really working. I did have 1 bad seizure, to a point where i had broken capillaries in my face. But thankfully it didnt create any issues with my surgery recovery. Im hoping things will start improving soon.

Generally my epilepsy has fucked up a lot. My short term memory is messed up and I have lost some skill sets after the bad seizures. I have been re-learning how to draw and paint! It is a very tedious process but i really feel like im making progress.

My autoimmune disease has been lowkey out of control and I saw my rheumo and I am going back on a low dose chemo drug. It really did help last time, it just made me so sick. But we will be looking into every option to control my nausea etc! So im trying to be hopeful. Ill start once im completely healed from my tonsillectomy, since the meds make you more likely to get infections and slows healing.

My uterus has also been absolutely fucked, once again. We were really hoping that removing the mass, scraping my uterus and putting the IUD would stop the bleeding, and it did, for 6 months. But im having issues again and I saw a specialist and we decided that the only option left for me is a hysterectomy. There is a year long wait though. This wasnt exactly on my list of things to do at 27.. but i suppose it is what it is.

Now for some good. Moppa is healthy and happy. She was attacked by a dog in september and got a bad gash but shes completely healed! She loves the fenced yard. We have been working on nosework stuff when im feeling okay enough for it! She is honestly such a light in the dark and I love her.

I get to renew my lease next year so i dont have to worry about housing!! Rent will be increasing bc inflation but im okay with swapping some meals with ramen to make things work, when I cant make extra money. I have been learning how to quilt!! My grandma does it a lot and i asked her to teach me so I am working on a project with her.

While things are generally a hot mess right now, i am mostly okay. And i feel like thats a big improvement for me, im not sure I would have handled all this a year ago. And im proud of myself.

With everything going on, I have obviously been unable to do commissions, or taking in dogsitting clients or anything i typically do to make money. If anyone is able to help, it is really appreciated. *This is my PayPal*, im afraid its my only way to receive anything. *any* amount helps. I really hope this is the last time i ever have to ask for anything. I feel like things are going to turn around now that we have solid plans to help with my health issues. The hope is that once my uterus is out and the low dose chemo has gotten my overall pain under control, that my epilepsy will chill out. It seems to be easily triggered via pain and hormones.

Thanks to anyone who had the patience to read this thing. I just havent posted an update in so long that there was a lot to say 😅 i am going to start being more active on here as ai really miss it. I will include the 2 art pieces I managed to make and finish. It took forever to figure everything out but im proud of myself. Quality may be a little destroyed bc tumblr likes to do that... i really hope i can offer commissions again soon. I might choose a person or two at random that donates and do a ghost commission like below for them? I can at least try. But youd have to message me on here after donating so i know who you are, i think i can attempt dog, cat or rabbit. But i cant promise anything.

I talked forever, im so sorry lol. Here is the paypal again because its definitely lost up there in the babble

Just to end this.. Has anyone here had a tonsillectomy as an adult and can tell me at what point it got better?

#personal babble #lord sorry for going off forever #my art

[arttrampbelle]

Cw: vent

Vent time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mk11 doesn't have plotholes

IT HAVE PLOT CHASMS. PLOT ABYSSES.

Plots so huge,so confusing,so stupid. It makes the old sub zero mythologies,and special forces side games look like decent plots.

The only thing good about it is the og actor is back as shang but even then it's still painful.

9,story is garbage. But the gameplay is amazing.

10,gameplay is out of this world. Story is mid,horrible for some characters but solid main big boss. Online i heard is better than 11. But i hate online competitive gameplay. It kinda sucks the fun away. And not worth it. Plus the amount of guest characters because they killed half the roster. It's ridiculous. And unnecessary. So yeah.

11. *breathes in*. 11. Again they knew the story was crap,half baked. So they made a whole ass expansion to a lukewarm story nobody cared for. To retcon a retcon THEY MADE. And guess what? It's that "we are gonna take everything you love about this series and take a huge fat shit on it. For profit" if you like shang tsung,you may love 11. But even then it feels off. But again thats the best they can do. And you damn well we ain't gonna have this again. If there ever will be a 12. Because at this point im not so sure. And honestly i don't care if they dont make a 12.

It would be a shame. But honestly I'd rather take a non canon ACTUALLY GOOD MK GAME. no bullshit. No fillers. No guest characters. No micro transactions. Just a good ol fashioned mk game. Pick a character,pick an arena,and fight. No complicated over explained story. Simple and to the point. Let the audience and players make a story. Or at least,bring back the spirit of mk. Bring back the ACTUAL CHOOSE YOUR DESTINY part in mk,with more than 2 choices. More than "good" vs "evil" actually have real constructive morally grey areas. Like it's not that hard.

Like get better writers. Fr.

Wattpad has better writers than you NRS.

WATTPAD!

You had 30yrs to get it right. 30!

Almost as old as i am.

Fr. No excuses. You are a decent,multibillion company. Or at very least a professional one. Your servers should be always up to date. You should have things actually in a row. The basics at least.

Like there is no excuses on being sloppy.

This isn't just about mk. This is also from a business perspective.

If you know your story isnt solid. Get better writers. Or tell your writers to stop relying on dumb tropes. And have actual creativity.

You can make things modern without pandering.

You can have nods to nostalgia without pandering too.

Subtle is better.

Cheeky one liners you cant rely on.

If the motives aren't solid. Then things fall apart.

Like they knew that if they dont bring back shang tsung as a big bad boss. It would suck.

Because how can they top corrupt form shinnok. Let's be honest....that was badass.

Nothing was ever really changed. And its a waste of time.

We get nothing but absolute perfection from tagawa's performance. But other then him. Mk11 is weak af.

So again. You like cary hiroyuki tagawa? Good. You're in luck. You like shang tsung? He's the man of the hour.

If you like anything else,anybody else,NRS said fuck you.

Which sucks. Because as a shang tsimp. It pisses me off that that's all they relied on.

And they can't pull that shit again. Because people will know. They already probably do.

They rely on cheap gimmicks,to prey on non mk fans,new fans who haven't touched mk in their whole ass existence and are just getting into it,and y'all fall for it. Because people seem to have short attention spans and need their gatcha fix no matter how poor quality.

Like im sorry. Even if you are new. Have better standards in storytelling. This is a professional company. They shouldn't be worse then us fans telling fart jokes in a fanfic about silly fighting game characters in colorful jammies.

Im just saying.

Im done venting now.

#mortal kombat #vent #cw vent #mk discourse

[zephyr-crest]

so i binge watched the entirety of The Owl House (S1&2) in just under 3 days and here’s how it went

so lets do a brief overview of me before watching owl house. originally i saw art work and small clips here and there. thought that the style and animation was cool, a show i’d prolly like. and then i saw art of bellos and i thought “..maybe i should watch this”. i wont lie, i thought bellos was kinda hot, he had sort of a loki vibe to him. anyway, i spoke with a friend of mine and he told be about The Owl House. so i figured “why not” and started binge watching it all. but that’s when it went down.. i got invested. i got attached to the characters and i needed to watch more. so i did! (this is where i use my discord messages to show my journey with the show, i’m leaving out minor discussions). !!!!!! INCLUDES SPOILERS !!!!!!!!!

so here you can kinda see what characters are catching my eye. edric, alador, warden wrath, king. and small details that i randomly think about like the eda and lilith lip thingy. the show at this point is very charming and the characters have won the majority of my heart, i’m loving this show. ohhh past me, you were not ready for the heartbreak and trauma buddy. 

originally i wasn’t a fan of amity, but she grew on me a lot over the episodes and you can see my slight thought process here

i thought that the relationship felt a bit rushed in my opinion but it might just be the pacing for the show, which i’m fine with. anyways moving on

this is where the pain started kicking in. i wasn’t prepared for the show to do that at all. the amount of times i gasped, paused the episode and walked away.. i thought it wasn’t gonna be more painful but OH MAN was i wrong

so uh, i may have liked bellos’ character a bit.. heh.. ahem, the fight between luz and lillith was amazing. always loved magic fights. and that wraps up season 1. it was really good, the show hit the ground running if you will. the animation team and effects, pls i love you guys so much. onward to season 2!!

you can sorta see that now i’m starting to ramble more in this group dm ^^. anyways, representation!!!!! we love to see it. now is the time where i started using screencaps to ramble with

hunter is just so good, we must protect that mans he’s gone through so much. we need to protect so many of them omg my heart

heh my rambles often go into whatever thought i have at the moment, but this is where the huge ending comes up (until season 3 that is). also edric?? sweetheart. he’s just a dork and i love that.

watching principle bump and the students fight alongside to absolutely destroy the guards was honestly such a treat. i loved it and i want more of it. also principle bump’s got some moves. not to mention the friendship development with gus and hunter!!! not mentioned here is the whole gus struggling with his mind and the illusion cast on the whole school. and fake willow is there and hunter is like “that’s not the captain”, THAT moment was SUCH a moment and i love hunter for that.

at this point in time i have 3 episodes left. i’ve cried over many episodes. but these last 3 made me just bawl my eyes out, especially the season finale King’s Tide.

i adored seeing more of steve, he’s such a goofball and honestly??? love him so much. i want more steve content, steve my beloved. i’d hang out with him, who else would??

and there it is folks. season 2 complete and my heart in shambles. take a look at luz when she tries to open the shack door a few times and have that distant look in her eyes. thats how i feel. i dont know what the creators are gonna do for season 3 but man, im glad they’re taking a hiatus so that i can recover from it. i’ll protect them lot from anything man. i hope eda and them lot are ok T^T

#the owl house #owl house #toh spoilers #the owl house spoilers #toh #toh season 2 #emperor belos #phillip wittebane #toh phillip wittebane #disney #the owl house belos #the owl house luz #the owl house amity #the owl house king #the owl house alador #the owl house eda #the owl house hooty #the owl house hunter #the owl house willow #the owl house gus #golden guard #lgbt #lgbtqia #the owl house the collector #emperors coven #steve owl house #coven scout #owl house steve #steve the owl house #steve toh

[hanabeeri]

id like to rewrite my last entry. last night i was not doing very well, ich wollte nämlich wieder in meinem eigenen zimmer nach zwei wochen schlafen, davor schlief ich im wohnzimmer (und letzte nacht übrigens auch).

i've gotten quite used to the amount of space i have on the sofa compared to my narrow bed, which is why i decided to pull out the frame and place my mattresses next to each other. als ich das aber tat lag auf der unteren matratze der größte silberfisch den ich je in meinem zimmer sah. und zu dem zeitpunkt war noch alles in ordnung, ich nahm den staubsauger, hab das vieh entfernt und ging noch einmal über die gesamte matratze. dann wollte ich den lacken wechseln, aber als ich die matratze anhob floh ein weiterer riesiger silberfisch unter meine bettpfosten. at that point i was still fine. no big deal, i got out the vacuum cleaner again and tried to reach it. but in that moment i saw a third huge silverfish right next to my hand, and i screamed and thats when the phobia started to kick in. normalerweise habe ich meine phobie vor ihnen ganz gut unter kontrolle, aber bei dem ausmaß konnte ich nicht mehr. und nachdem ich einen vierten silberfisch in der ersatzbettwäsche sah überkam mich seit langem eine angst attacke; ich fing an panisch zu weinen, unregelmäßig zu atmen und zu zittern.

needless to say, i did not sleep in my bedroom yesterday night.

i dont even know how to rephrase what happened with my friend. i just dont understand why he behaved that way. if he simply wants my reassurance he can kindly put that wish elsewhere. i am not a parrot that will tell him the same thing over and over again. and when i couldn't keep it in anymore and started throwing my own emotional distress on him he didnt even flinch. he didnt care. he just asked if we could talk about his problems. and i felt so bad and ashamed i agreed but he started pulling his jokes and shenanigans instead. and when i apologized to him for pulling that stunt earlier; for emotionally dumping on him he simply laughed it off and said it didnt matter because his worries are bigger than mine anyway? im sorry for my word choice, but how mentally deranged do you have to be, how socially unaware and deaf to say to a person that your pain is bigger than the pain of another, as if its a competition? i could have said the same thing to him, i could have been mean but i wasn't. i just went to sleep.

and i was so stupid. i trusted him so much that i even asked him to join a party that i will host with a friend. ich werde ihm einfach nicht mehr antworten. und wenn der zeitpunkt dann so weit ist und er nach der location fragen wird, werde ich ihn ebenfalls ignorieren. soll er doch mal fühlen, wie es so ist nicht ernst genommen zu werden.

on a lighter note i will see my parents today after two weeks! i thought that they would have come home yesterday, but i messed up the dates.

so uh, the small parking lot next to the train station got locked for whatever reason. and i had to illegally drive on some streets i wasn't supposed to be on and now im standing on a parking lot for impaired people. if the police will tell me to go away i will simply start crying.

#20220917

[dnalkaline]

ugh nobody actually has to read this i just feel like i need to type all my thoughts out somewhere or i'll explode.

I know like 9-12k$ isn't like impossible to get but it feels so daunting and i know barely anyone will reblog or donate to my GFM if i made one (as always happens for my medical shit. even for my pets) so idk what the fuck do even do about this. I'm trying not to be cynical about it but that's just been the running theme since. literally my entire life. i don't even know why i bother anymore

Honestly i have no hope for my future if that shit grows back and leaves me in the same amount of pain as someone going through labor multiple times a year AGAIN i think i will actually kill myself for real. im sick of this shit.

like this isn't even a dysphoria thing it's something that could ACTUALLY kill me through blood clots and nobody in my life IRL even fucking cares. My mom has enough money to just pay for a hysterectomy out of pocket for me without it being a huge deal to her and she just fucking won't and just keeps telling me to harass my insurance about it despite this being months of back-and-forth and i can already feel my endo symptoms growing back.

My insurance flat-out told me they'll only approve it if it keeps growing back and i have to go through surgery to remove it multiple times. This isn't even counting the fact I also have CYSTS that need to be removed because they're also causing pain and my insurance just... won't fucking approve it

The symptoms are already coming back after my most recent surgery and I'm still having periods despite the fact I'm POST-MENOPAUSE.

I don't understand why people keep preventing me from committing suicide just to not actually help me with the reasons why I keep trying to kill myself. it feels cruel. People say to reach out or whatever and then go radio silent. it feels so performative. I don't even mean that i expect my friends to give me money because i know everyone has problems but it feels like i keep being ignored and people make a point to not even reblog my help posts. It's always like the same 3 people getting in touch.

at this rate i hope i die. everyone keeps telling me it'll get better and i just have to go on but my entire life is me getting out of the frying pan and into the fire. Therapy hasn't been helping anymore because all the depression isn't like trauma shit it's just the poverty and the fact life keeps actively trying to get me killed by any means necessary all the time. I'm exhausted.

I'm tired of being the sick friend that's treated like the elephant in the room just because i can't fucking do anything and every inch of my life is just another walking trigger warning to people. I've become self conscious about needing to walk with mobility aids now because I feel like it's just another reminder of my fragility and inevitable demise to people.

I just don't fucking get it. i metaphorically break my back all the time to help other people with their shit but i barely get anything in return (except from the same few ppl i mentioned earlier and i am very grateful you guys are real friends). like. am i doing something wrong. am i just an unlikable person. i know people think i'm scary which i try to offset by being nice but i don't know if it's working.

I'm only alive right now because all of the fucking demon pacts and other spirit work i do causing me to avoid stuff and get more opportunities and I feel stupid about it because that's not even stuff that most people believe in and can't even be proven to be real.

i dont even know where im going with this im tired and i want to give up. fuck life. i actively despise life most of the time. I guess I just have to keep clinging to my blorbos i dont fucking know. whatveer.

#suicide mention tw #null rambles

[my-fool]

Just collecting my thoughts... nothing scary but vague allusions to sexual trauma and ptsd symptoms

For 3 nearly 4 years ive been working hard to destigmatise sex in my mind and reduce the panic and fear that immediately flooded and immobilised me whenever sex was mentioned especially in relation to myself.

I made a looot of progress, reducing physical symptoms. Now, when im aroused, I no longer have intense physical pain in my pelvis, and arousal doesn't make me feel *as* intensely nauseous (it does sometimes, but I no longer start retching).

Actually sidebar that is so strange because I used to assume that was normal because I thought it was just overwhelming stimulation made everyone nauseous but other overwhelming stimulation (bright lights/noises) don't usually make me nauseous unless I'm already having a migraine so it's not even true for me?? Let alone everyone else? What kind of world would we live in if sexual arousal made everyone feel like they had food poisoning lmao

I still get vaginismus so intensely that it gives me very sore pelvic muscles sometimes if I dont conscious relax every minute or so. But vaginismus is so common that it could be coincidental anyway. Even if it isn't, the only way to solve it would be dilaters and any kind of vaginal penetration would be a Not Under Any Circumstances for me.

Anyway we've moved from sex awful to sex neutral... but the idea of having sex with someone willingly seems like such a daunting prospect. I find it so hard to imagine being that kind of person.

It makes me sad because I don't think I'll ever have a relaxed or natural attitude towards sex. Even if, in a couple years, I move the needle towards having a more-positive-than-negative attitude to sex, in order to actually sleep with a partner the level of trust would have to be on par with marriage worthy material.

And that's *if* I don't prematurely sabotage the relationship beforehand. A two years ago I turned down a girl I actually kinda liked, just because I knew I had such a huge amount of baggage surrounding sex (and they were sexually active) that I was petrified of getting to that point and being unable to meet them there. I couldn't trust myself to be able to communicate with them or act in a logical, reasonable manner because sex hits the Random Painful button in my brain and I act like a dog with a sparking shock collar.

Maybe someday.

Because my trauma happened so young, I never got to develop normally, so I've never had a simple relationship to sex. I don't know sex outside of a cold type of observation of the most painful parts of myself.

Most people seem to like sex so I'm open to someday liking it too. But I think a lot of peace comes from accepting that that might never happen, and getting to the point where the thought of sex no longer hurts me is more important than pushing myself to conform into a shape that society accepts.

Anyway, I lied. I don't like sex. Eat this rotating hamburger instead

#logged #csa mention #complex ptsd

[goremet-chef]

im too big of a coward to play normal on my own i cannottttt do it my role is vital and i cant play it alone!!! my role is resident paranoid and by god i play it well 😁😁 my friend is very. LOUD, they only use the fuckin chainsaw to cut down trees. EFFECTIVE YES, BUT LOUD!!!!! so i need to stand back and watch very very closely to see if anything comes for us. IM SCARED TO BE SNUCK UP ON AGAIN so now im just. my paranoia has tripled in that game and hey! i havent gotten snuck up on since! so id say its technically a win (ramble)

thats something thats different with sons of the forest, yesterday i was alone for like. an decent amount of time when we played and i didnt feel hardly scared at all. GRANTED, it wasnt mutant spawning time yet but even in the forest im scared day 1 to day 100 baby. no, it was relaxing even. SOTF is just. rgRGgrrg

because the forest is an older game its less? i mean sons of the forest is just better like better graphics, better ai, etc etc etc which is great, its a more fulfilling experience in a sense? the game is fucking gorgeous!! the cannibal ai is really interesting, the animals are better ETC like idk to me its just more tranquil and im relaxed more often then not

WITH THE FOREST THOUGH? existential dread all the way through. the beginning week is fairly easy, we usually have some kind of base by then ofc, but after that week passes? im not the man i used to be 💀 i get quieter because i need to listen for mutants, im CONSTANTLY looking around. ive learned that if i see one, i need to be super clear about it (unlike my bestie who literally just saw girl mutant behind me and booked it 😁) im a lot quieter about being startled in that game until something starts chasing me MAINLY so i dont accidentally scare my bestie cuz like.

the forest entire ATMOSPHERE is a little desolate, like i love this game, but god i feel. ITS LIKE YR JUST WAITING TILL SOMETHING GETS YOU IT FEELS REALLY AWFUL SKFJSF for me it honestly has similar vibes to squirrel stapler???? not good KSFJS

anyways no it kills me the amount of chest pain and shaky hands the forest has given me, youd think i just faced god bro

nope! good ol johnny boy and armsy pretty much exclusively? IDK WHY THAT IS.. virginia isnt very loud so i have a hard time hearing her but i tend to see her way before she gets close, and shes not super hard to fight for me? lure her to the water and have her charge into it 🙄 easy peasy. cowman a little harder, they are sporadic and they turn on a dime which is not good! theyre huge. but the charge into the water thing can work on them too. me and my friend need to kill one of those actually, we have all the other mutant heads on our wall except that one 😔

armsy cant really be lured like that? everything about armsy is just. my nightmare. huge, loud, fast. not cool!! we can kill them fairly easily but even still like. IM STILL SCARED EVEN IF I KNOW THERES BIGGER THREATS its so personal between us bro

also i heard if you use the???? rage thing the ANGER BALL you can attract like. a group of SIX MUTANTS, fuck all that noise. i want the peace ball actually thatd be so dope

overall its just. horrible to be honest, and specifically like I CANT HANDLE LIVING ANYWHERE ELSE THAN WHERE WE ALWAYS LIVE (which is where markiplier made his base in the more recent forest playthru 💀) cuz its fairly open?? AND EVEN WHEN ITS OPEN IM STILL SCARED

imagine the fear when we have to go deeper into the forest for any reason 😀

unimaginable, downright painful i know this game has taken years off my life at this point. ITS JSUT SO AWFUL MANN because now that the trees are thicker, you've taken one of my vital senses away which is sight! i am now afraid and have to rely on my ears alone! (cicerocore tbh)

its. SICKENNING I HATE IT SO MUCH RGRGAGR even though i know im strong and i fuck up those cannibals like no tomorrow, even the mutants we dont struggle that much with (besides maybe the blue variants) its still SCARYYY no i hate it. my friend always makes me go with her like okay time to loot cloth from the village cmon bestie lets go :]]

. okay. like I WANNA BE THERE WITH HER BUT no i do not, i just. theyre CARELESS my MC instincts kick in cuz theyre careless in minecraft to and im like. constantly jumping forward in dark caves to kill whatever is in front of us so it wont kill her and leave me alone KSJFS so its like that but worse! i need to listen for both our sakes its exhausting 💀💀 and most of the time there is some kind of mutant in the forest, like only ONCE WE WENT and there was no mutant at the village

ironically despite that run through being flawless, no cannibals no mutants, i was still completely petrified like there was, it was so. NOTHING GOOD EVER HAPPENS IN THE FOREST its just waiting for when something inevitably jumps out at you. but nothing did and ive never felt more uncomfortable in my lifee it was horrible. that one time was directly after we were dealing with girl mutant too, awful vibes the forest like

THATS THE EASIEST WAY TO SUM IT UP, the forest gives absolutely RANCID vibes truly terrible. sons of the forest is pretty and relaxing at times and just nice and the forest?? no its horrific its just terrible awful energy, i love it. this game is gonna kill me but i love it!!

[skyeateyourdonuts]

hiii

i ranted about a thing and im reranting here bc there sucked

uh smth womanhood uh right yes okay i am particularly urked about this thing in adulthood and i think also womanhood that is the duplicity of trying to prove competence and trying to make up for lack of competence

for instance the areas these seem to happen are ones around ppl in my life who, while i feel wholly safe admitting my incompetence and confusion, also never expect me to know anything thus. i understand that it can be confusing to decipher then what would be my strengths but if u Know me and ive become comfortable enough to admit incompetence it is bc im trusting u not to steamroll me and to listen to me and understand that i am also a human who does know Some Fucking Things

the other instance, making up for lack of competence, is just trying to survive when i believe theres a lot sitting on my shoulders. i worry that the trust being placed on me has not taken into account that i will mess up or that i may know the exact same amount as them and still expected to do more than my abilities allow.

its hard to feel like ive earned this trust in my competence and ability when in that other instance its constantly being challenged. its hard to feel secure in my decisions in both instances and also to shift between them, as they often feel like two different worlds where the chance at being confronted for malfeasance seems ever present, like its an unknown sea creature hunting me down but only till im too exhausted to swim.

the connection i make to womanhood in this sense is that i see this reflection in other women. a huge aspect of feminism is believing that women are capable of making their own decisions and when women are robbed of that, its painful and ive seen it and experienced it. theres nothing wrong with asking why someone did something but taking the chance to make that decisions away or simply making it for them does not treat them as a person.

another connection that could be made is simply age and experience. older people or more experienced people i think tend to wanna show off what they know or what theyve learned by making these decisions for someone else, maybe showing them smth theyve never known, but isnt it better that they learn it themselves?? its different if its smth that person doesnt mind not making a decision about in comparison to things that may affect their life or expand their Own abilities. u could show off, yes, but isnt it better that they learn on their own?

at this point, i dont think im all that knowledgeable and i dont think im all that experienced. i think i wanna be good and i wanna be smart and try it all, but it is incredibly hard climbing theough the sludge of uncertainty that comes from these experiences. theyre not harrowing or traumatic, i think, but still uncomfortable and repeated times really do feel like sinking into quicksand. but i got it lmao i got a good role model im good i got this anyways bye :3

#im judt ranting dont pay too much attention #twt is dying id rather rant here #oh god im so sorry guys theyre no longer contained in tags #😭😭😭😭😭 #i promise ill spoiler line them #gata #hehe

[inpainbutvibing]

being chronically ill be like: this is the worst pain ive ever experienced, no wait THIS is the worst pain ive ever experienced, no wait THIS is the worst pain ive ever experienced, no wait

#at this point im just in a huge amount of pain and i dont know if its getting better or worse #chronic headaches #chronic illness #chronic migraine #occipital neuralgia #chronic pain #spoonie #text post

[d3athwish]

-

#january has been one of the hardest months of my life so far in terms of like the painful side of actively trying to get better #everyday is harder than the last to not relapse. and im trying really hard to stay clean but is there even really a point #im a little less than 2 months clean which isnt even a long time so if i relapsed its not like a huge amount of progress would be gone yk #i dont even remember why i relapsed the last time. i had been 3 months clean which is the longest ive gone #idk man i wish i never started self harming in the first place #but it took my mind off suicide for a while so i guess i cant regret it too much which sounds weird but idk it just be that way #but yeah staying clean has never been this hard before and i KNOW im gonna give in eventually so why the fuck not just do it now #i think it would be easier if i had someone actively telling me they were proud of me for staying clean. it would make me wanna stay clean #but only 2 people know abt my sh and the only one i talk to about it SOMETIMES just begs me not to do it again #which like. okay thanks for the good intentions but youre not fucking helping #sorry for unloading all of this but a bitch is just rlly goin through it these days #tw self harm

[kyovtani]

𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 – 𝐤𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐢 𝐤𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐮 (𝟐)

— pairing: Kyoutani Kentarou x female Reader

— genre: smut, angst, little bit of fluff to keep the balance; tattoo artist!kyoutani, inexperienced!reader, strangers to lovers!AU, SLOW BURN

— word count: 9.6k

— warnings: swearing, mentions of infidelity and violence, as well as the consumption of drugs and alcohol; smut: corruption kink, degradation and dumbification, dacryphilia, praising, spitting, (soft) dom!kyou, oral (m. receiving), fingering, dry humping, unprotected sex (dont do that kids), impreg kink, iwaoi say hi-

— (A/N: and here’s part two! thank you SO much for all the love you sent my way after i published the first part. ngl i was a little nervous bc i thought it was boring and not interesting at all but you guys easily pushed me out of that hole so thank you for everything. i love and appreciate you with my whole heart. all the love, zade xx)

[ part one ]

— summary: after fucking up, you make it your mission to get him back..(im so bad at this pls just- okay.)

"He's not picking up, Hana", you say, another soft cry falling from your lips before you bury your face in your pillow.

“Once in my fucking life a guy treats me good and the way I've always wanted to be treated and I had to fuck it up. Why the fuck am I like this, Hana? Why can I not enjoy one fucking good thing in my fucking mediocre life", the profanities keep coming just like the tears and the amount of frustration and anger rushing through your veins is nowhere near normal anymore.

"Calm down, love", Hana sighs and makes you sit up so she can look into your tear stained face as she tries her best to make sure her words actually find their way to your pain clouded mind, "at this point you shouldn't worry too much because you do know Kyoutani, don't you? He does lose his temper a lot, so give him the time he needs and then you'll show up at his doorstep, suck his cock and make up with him, yeah?", she explains calmly.

"If this hurts you so much, why the fuck did you even say he's just a friend, Y/N? I really don't understand", Hana mumbles and lets out another sigh, her hands caressing yours softly, managing to calm you down a little bit.

“You're right, I should just– give him some time and things will eventually fall into place", you reply after crying a little more and with an encouraging smile your best friend nods at you before she suggests a movie marathon to which you happily agree.

At least something to distract you from all the demons inside your head.

After changing into your pj's and doing your night time routine, you plop down onto the couch next to your bestie again, her eyes focused on the phone in her hand and knowing she's probably either sexting or inviting her new boyfriend has you shrugging at her lack of attention as you start looking for a good movie to begin the night with.

However, just when you're about to read the description of some kind of french rom-com, Hana puts her phone back into her lap and starts staring at you with her pretty eyes widened in shock.

"What's wrong?", you ask and turn to look at her, reaching for her hands but before you even get the chance to touch her, Hana unlocks her phone and holds it up for you to watch someone's instagram story.

The video begins with loud music, a crowd full of young college students whose faces definitely are familiar.

Everyone in the video is dancing, making out, smoking and just chatting in a random living room and every now and then there's someone yelling in the back – a typical college party.

However, just as the video is about to end, the camera shifts to a tall male leaning against the wall, obviously standing really close to the person who's filming and it takes you a full blown thirty seconds to realize who said male is.

Kyoutani Kentarou.

You stare at the phone for another minute, your throat dry and your head empty as a thick veil of tears slowly starts blurring your sight before you finally decide to pay attention to the username.

"He can't be fucking serious", you hiss, fisting the blanket beneath you, the urge to punch something or someone becoming unbearable, "what the fuck is he doing at a random college party with – Sora?"

"Y/N, don't–", "Whose party is that?", you interrupt your best friend, not giving a single fuck about her attempts to calm you down; not anymore. Hana gulps harshly and strictly avoids your gaze as she mumbles a name and you roll your eyes, asking her to speak up with an annoyed sigh.

"It's one of Yuuji’s frat parties", and as soon as your best friend says the name of your ex-boyfriend, a cold shiver of disgust runs down your spine and you can feel yourself getting lightheaded from all the emotions rushing through your overwhelmed body.

"Don't follow me if you're going to stop me from leaving, Hana", you say and stand up before quickly disappearing inside your room.

You have no idea how you manage to get dressed, your outfit consisting of a pair of jeans and a hoodie you can't even remember buying and you don't even wanna think about what your hair and face look like when you end up leaving the house with your keys and your phone.

After driving this route for over two years on an almost daily basis, it takes you less than ten minutes to arrive in front of the huge house your ex-boyfriend lives in.

The memories start finding their way back into your head way too fast, taking away your breath and numbing your whole body because even if you didn’t love Yuuji anymore, the bitter feeling of betrayal still manages to hit you in just the right way.

It takes you a lot of willpower to actually approach the house and eventually get in. And after being in between the crowds of drunk, stinky college students, you remember why you hate college parties so much.

"I – Wow”, a familiar voice manages to break through the loud music, your instant reaction just an annoyed eye roll, “you were the last person I expected to see at one of our frat parties", Yuuji says and comes to stand in front of you.

His blonde hair messily falling into his handsome face and from the way his whole face seems to be covered in the deepest shade of red – including his eyes – you know that he's probably higher than the stars and you can't help but sigh.

"I'm not here to party, Yuuji", you hiss, feeling the anger crawl up your spine again the longer you look at your ex, "my boyfriend is here and I have to talk to him."

"So you and that tattooed guy are actually a thing? Didn't think so since he, you know – showed up with another girl", Terushima mumbles and pulls out a cigarette from his pocket, a mischievous smile on his lips.

"Oh, shut the fuck up, Yuuji", you spit back and roll your eyes, taking in the way the pretty boy arches his brows up in pure shock at your rather new attitude, "go and get high or whatever you do to feel proud of yourself", are the last words you say to him before you walk away, your heart thrumming inside your throat.

Your eyes roam the huge crowd, desperately searching for the only face you wanna look at right now and you try to remember where they were standing in the video Sora had posted only to realize that you can't remember.

After all you only watched the video once, your whole attention laying on Kyoutani. And after almost fifteen minutes, you find yourself slowly giving up.

Maybe this was just not meant to happen or maybe Kyoutani has left already.

He probably left with Sora- something you can’t and won’t ever blame him for.

After all she's literally one of the prettiest and hottest girls you have ever seen – anyone who rejects her would be out of their mind (or not attracted to girls which isn't the case when it comes to Kyoutani).

You give it another ten minutes of desperately looking around before you let out a deep sigh which gets lost in the loudness and thick air of the party before you finally start making your way back to the front door.

You quickly walk back to your car, trying your best to ignore everyone around you, especially all the drunk guys who are currently about to get into a verbal fight over something totally random and the last thing you want to experience those threats becoming reality.

At some point you're scared they might even include you which is probably why you end up literally sprinting and even though you always park so far away from frat houses just because you've heard way too many stories of people getting their cars stolen during parties, but right now you just wished you would have listened to your gut feeling and parked in front of the fraternity like every normal person.

However, to your life long luck, you spot a tall figure standing a little too close to your vehicle just as you’re about to unlock it. You slow down your movements almost instantly upon seeing the stranger, yet your eyes still try to figure out if it's someone you know despite the darkness surrounding the two of you.

He has probably spotted you by now, after all you're still panting like crazy from speed walking down to where your car is and it takes you a full minute to realize how loud you're actually being.

"Y/N", the male suddenly says, his deep voice sending shivers down your spine and even though it could have been everyone, it sounds a tad bit too familiar to your ears which is probably why you end up approaching him slowly.

"It's me, Kyoutani", he adds and at the same moment the words leave his lips, you finally recognize his pretty features which seem extra beautiful underneath the bright moonlight.

And then realization hits you.

"How did you know–", "Hana called me and asked if I could make sure you got home even if I didn't want to talk to you. So, here I am. Get in the car so I can tell her I did my part of the job", he interrupts you quickly, obviously not having the intention to interact with you and the way his usually so tender-filled eyes and calming voice are nothing but ice-cold has a thick veil of tears blurring your sight.

Never ever did you think about the moment, where Kyoutani puts the cold mask on he loved to hide behind when he had first looked at you all those weeks ago.

And the longer he avoids your gaze, the heavier the burden on your chest becomes.

"I'm sorry, Tani", you whisper, your voice breaking at the end, easily giving away how much his cold demeanor has gotten to you.

“Of course you're not just a friend to me and I d-don't know why I introduced you like that, everything happened so quickly and I – panicked. It's not an excuse and does not justify my behavior but I just wanted you to know that you've always been more than just a friend to me", you continue, managing to keep talking upon realizing that Kyoutani won't interrupt you and the way he even listens to you with his eyes looking everywhere but yours is absolutely enough for you.

"What am I to you then, Y/N? Am I the guy you're casually fucking? Your booty call? Am I your second choice? Like what the fuck do you expect me to say? I know we never put a label to – this", he starts pointing at you and then himself, "but you knew I was serious about it, about you. So, I just don't understand why you would even think about considering me a friend. I told you that I am not one for that friends with benefits kinda shit and you agreed yet you did this and now I can't help but be convinced you just used me to get that Yuuji fucker.”

Kyoutani is angry and he doesn't even try to hide it as he spits out those words, the ones he’s probably been dying to say out loud for the past few days and you know he has every right to actually be mad at you, his words still hit you in a way you didn't expect them to.

"I'd never do that to you, Kentarou; I'd never use you like that, please believe me", you say quickly, a little surprised you're even able to form proper sentences.

“You m-mean so much to me and I just don't know how to put it into words. My heart hurt so much when I watched you type your number into Sora's phone but the demons in my head, they just kept talking over my heart and – I'm just really sorry, Kyou, I really am", you sigh and after realizing that he's not going to look at you, you finally manage to shift your gaze away from his pretty face.

"Go home, Y/N. It's been a long day for both of us and I think some more distance will help me get my mind straight", Kyoutani replies after a long, torturous beat of silence lingering in the cold air and even if it wasn’t the reply you had hoped to hear, you're glad he's at least not completely ending it.

"Okay b-but at least let me drive you home?", you ask softly, wiping away the few tears which had managed to escape and when you look up at the beautiful faced male in front of you, his eyes meet you for the first time since what feels like forever and you feel yourself melting away.

"I don't think that's a good idea, pretty girl", Kyoutani sighs, the soft pet name sending your mind into the sweetest haze of comfort just like that, "it's only been a few days but I am craving your touch and I just know I'm going to lose it and fuck you against the next best surface if we get into that car together, so I have to decline this offer", he adds and takes another step back, his lips stretching into a tiny smile and you can’t deny how much his words have you gotten you worked up, but you have no choice but to nod.

"Have a good night, baby", Kyoutani sighs and deep down you're hoping for a kiss, after all it's been way too long since you got to feel close to him but instead, he just lifts his hand up and starts waving at you and just as he is about to turn around, you find yourself reaching for his wrist. The fear and despair inside of you making you a little too brave for your personal liking but you know you can't just let him walk away like that.

"Please, Tani- Kyoutani", you whisper and let out a soft sigh of relief when he turns around to face you again, "I won't try anything, I just want to spend a little bit more time with you."

Kyoutani takes a deep breath, his dark eyes roaming your face and wandering down your body and even though it feels like he's literally devouring you alive, you enjoy his burning gazes regardless, a hidden part inside of you even craving them.

A solid minute passes by before he lets out a sigh and gives you a nod, his plump lips pressed into a thin line.

It takes you another deep breath and a couple of seconds to actually calm yourself down from the rollercoaster of emotions you've been through within the time span of an hour and as you sit there in your car, inhaling the cold air of the night, your mind starts replaying everything that went down, starting from the day you met Kyoutani, to your first and most recent kiss, as well as the encounter with Sora and your deep anger towards Yuuji.

The drive to Kyoutani's apartment passes by in a blur, way too fast for your liking and you can't help but pout when you pull up in front of the huge building, knowing very well that this will be the last interaction with the handsome tattoo artist for the upcoming few days and you can already feel tears pricking at the corners of your eyes.

He's been awfully quiet, not like you actually said anything but Kyoutani's silence was intense, boring into your soul and actually suffocating you to a point where the urge to just jump out of the car became overwhelming.

You know he's probably going through everything just like you, yet the feeling that his thoughts are more on the negative side just won't leave you alone and you hate the way your assumptions are being confirmed as soon as Kyoutani turns to look at you.

"I – love you, Y/N", he suddenly says, his voice soft and calm, yet still deep and the way it's filled with tenderness and the sweetest bit of longing makes the effect of those magical words even heavier.

Your lips part in shock, your head having a difficult time actually processing his confession and you can feel your whole body going into a standby mode.

"But you're not good for me."

You remember the way your heart broke into thousands of pieces when you found out the alleged love of your life was cheating on you without even batting an eye.

The pain was so intense and heavy, you didn't know how to deal with it and at some point you were convinced that your heart had stopped beating for a solid minute. It was bad, left you speechless and threw you into a hole of darkness you barely managed to escape from, yet still leaving you grateful for the experience.

You thought your first heartbreak would be able to prepare you for what's to come in the future, but what you went through as soon as those words had fallen past Kyoutani’s lips, can't be compared to anything you've ever felt before.

Your heart starts clenching as his words keep replaying inside of your head and your throat so is going absolutely dry from your desperate attempts to gasp for air as the feeling of being suffocated comes back.

Everything around you seems to disappear, your eyes still focused on Kyoutani's intense gaze as the feeling of emptiness starts filling up your whole body.

You easily lose track of time, your heart beat so slow and heavy and when the wave of reality crashes you yet again, an almost inaudible sob falls past your lips.

"B-But...", you can't get yourself to speak, the words getting stuck in your throat and soft cries the only thing filling the inside of your car.

And yet, there are so many things you want to tell him, so many things rushing through your mind at the highest speed, almost impossible to grasp them and actually put them into proper sentences.

"You have too much control over me. I lost myself trying to fit into the picture of a lover you need and deserve. But – I am not who I used to be anymore”, Kyoutani explains, nervously rubbing the sides of his pierced node with his thumb as he avoids looking in your direction at all costs.

“I am scared of losing what's obviously not mine. You make me feel weak and vulnerable and I just can't deal with it. You've become the center of my world, and I can't control how much it affects me. How much you affect me and – I hate it", he continued, his voice is still incredibly calm, yet a bittersweet tone of fear coating every single one of his words.

"B-But...", yet again, the whole of your vocabulary seems vanished, not one word to say as the knot in your throat tightens even further.

"I'm sorry, Y/N. I thought I could do it but – I am not meant to love and you deserve to be loved in the most special way possible”, he takes another quick break, letting out a sigh of exhaustion, “and that's why I'm letting you go. Please, don't hate me. Take care and – goodbye, my love.”

Those are his last words before he presses his lips against your forehead, making your head spin like crazy because of the contrast of his heartbreaking words and his soft kiss.

Kyoutani leaves without saying another word. He doesn't even look back once as he walks away and enters the apartment building, while you can't stop staring at the door with hot tears streaming down your cheeks and loud sobs filling the suffocating air surrounding you.

There you are, yet again.

Your eyes staring into the dark night as your body tries to cope with the intensity of pain you've thought you had overcome.

The constant breaking of your heart starts numbing every part of your body and you slowly start losing yourself in this certain kind of darkness.

Seconds turn into minutes and without even realizing, a whole hour has gone by with you staring into nothing.

Your mind plays games with you as it keeps replaying his words, his behavior, his kiss and the feeling of slowly but certainly going insane as you get out of the car a little too fast.

You tumble back, the sudden coldness hitting you right in the face and the mental as well as physical exhaustion has your body trembling.

And then it hits you.

The wave of anger, wrath, frustration and hatred literally wakes you up, pulls you back into reality and ends up taking over you completely.

Your eyes find the huge apartment building Kyoutani lives in, staring at it as if you could set it on fire and you know what you're about to do is a bad idea but your body acts before your mind can even get the chance to intervene.

And that's how you find yourself almost brutality slamming your fist against Kyoutani's door, your heart hammering against your rib cage way too fast for it to be still physically healthy and ten thousand different thoughts rushing through your chaotic mind.

"What the fuck is going – Y/N", Kyoutani looks at you with his pretty eyes slightly widened in shock, his lips parting as he struggles to keep his eyes on you and a disgusting feeling of shame and embarrassment starts filling you up.

You know this is pathetic, you are aware of how stupid you look standing in front of him like this but you just can't get yourself to actually care about it.

"Y/N, please don't-", "No, I listened to what you had to say and now I'm going to talk and you're going to listen to me. Before that I am not going anywhere because I deserve this", you cut him off, hands balled into fists as you try to stay calm but the more you think about his words in the car, the angrier you get.

"I–", Kyoutani sighs, his eyes nervously roaming your face and upon noticing the way you seem to shiver from the cold and your lack of clothing, he lets his conscience get the best of him, "alright, come in then.”

You follow him inside, the familiar scent of vanilla and Kyoutani's favorite febreeze scent filling your nose and you hate the way how comfortable you are.

After all you've been spending quite some time in this apartment; visiting him after your classes so he could bury his face between your legs and then offer you some homemade food, followed by a good old ghibli movie and lots of cuddles has become some kind of routine.

Oh, how you hate him for ruining all of those memories.

"Do you want something to drink? You're probably freezing", he offers, his voice filled with concern and you know he is right and you'd definitely give everything for a cup of tea and maybe some water, you still shove all of your body’s basic needs into the very back of your head and try to regain your composure.

"I – you – we", you take a deep breath, your mind struggling to put all of those racing thoughts into some kind of order, yet failing miserably.

But there's so much you want to say to him; so many things you want him to hear and now that you are actually standing in front of him, your body betrays you.

"You're a fucking coward, Kyoutani Kentarou", is the first thing you finally manage to let out, "and I hate you for leaving me like this. I fucking hate you.”

Deep down, you hate yourself for saying those words; the choice of words and the incredible heaviness they come with are usually not your way of expressing yourself yet you're not regretting them.

You don't know how this night is going to end, maybe this will be the last time you get to see Kyoutani or he'll eventually fuck you into oblivion and you finally end up together; but nevertheless you want your words to hurt him; you want them to wake him up just like his did to you.

"How dare you confess your love to me and tell me I basically ruined your life in the same breath when you're the one who's fucking all of this – us up. Yes, I’ve made a mistake and I've been regretting my choice of words for the past four days, even came to the point where I accepted your distance and decided to let go because I know how much my words hurt you. But us ending like this? Definitely not going to happen", Kyoutani stares at you with his pretty eyes focusing you attentively, barely blinking, not moving at all; he’s just listening to you.

"I just – don't understand how you can be this oblivious."

"Oblivious? Oblivious to what?", he asks, his voice a little deeper and raspier, sending goosebumps straight dow your spine as if your body needed to remind you the effect he has on you.

"Oblivious to everything. This is what love does to people, Kentarou. Of course you're going to feel weak and vulnerable because of me - because of the one you love. After all the point of being loved and loving someone else is showing those vulnerabilities and weakness to the person you trust the most because you know, or at least you hope, they won't take advantage of it.”

You take a deep breath, your mind slowing down as you ease yourself into his calming embrace and subconsciously losing yourself in the comfort it comes with.

“I'm yours. I've been yours since the very first day and we both know this, that's why you are so scared of losing me. And that's why my words hurt you so much”, you can tell that he’s already processing your words as much as he can; his habit of scratching the back of his head giving him away easily.

"You said you've lost yourself trying to fit into this picture of someone who I deserve but – you are the one who created that picture in the first place. Just because my first boyfriend was an alleged goody two shoes doesn't mean that you have to be like that too. Fuck that", you hiss, the thought of Kyoutani changing even the slightest bit about himself sending jolts of anger through your veins, "I don't care if you dropped out of college or that you have tattoos and piercings and bleach blonde hair. None of that matters to me because it's you, your kind heart and your pure soul I fell in love with.”

And suddenly - you can feel the burden on your shoulders disappear when those certain words leave your lips and the second Kyoutani raises his eyebrows in slight surprise before he locks eyes with you again has another breath of fresh air run through your suffocated lungs.

"Yes, I'm in love with you, Kyoutani Kentarou. Believe it or not, but for me, you're perfect just like this, with all your tiny habits and every single tattoo. There's nothing I'd change about you and I'm genuinely, truly sorry if I ever made you feel like you needed to change for me. You're a great guy and I guess that's why I ran back here after sitting in that car, crying for an hour because I couldn't stop thinking about the way you confessed your love to me”, you feel the thick veil of tears appear before they manage to block your sight, making the pretty face in front of you turn into bourry little pixels as your emotions overwhelm you.

“And yes, you are meant to be loved; maybe not meant to be loved by me but you deserve to be loved, do you hear me?"

You go up to him, closing some of the distance between the two of you before your finger darts out and poke his strong chest, trying to ease the tension after letting go of all those thoughts, "you deserve to love and to be loved because you're a good person. And I just – wanted to thank you for letting me into your life. Meeting you, getting to know the beautiful person you are has been one of the best things that has happened to me and I will cherish these memories forever."

And with those words you take a deep breath, let out another sigh, goving away your acceptance of defeat before you lift your head and prepare yourself to say your last goodbye no matter how painful it is.

"Take care, Kyoutani Kentarou and thank you, for everything", the words fall past your lips in the form of a whisper solely because you're too scared to break if you raised your volume just slightly.

You turn around and feel the first tear find its way down your cheek before you even get to walk away.

And just as you wrap your fingers around the doorknob, the sound of rushed footsteps approaching you makes you halt your movements.

"D-Don't go", Kyoutani suddenly says, his voice breaking when he comes to stand behind you, so close you can actually feel the warmth he's radiating, "I need you...so bad", he whispers into your ear, pressing his forehead against the back of your neck and it's like everything that happened tonight becomes irrelevant.

You turn around, not expecting Kyoutani to push you against the door with his whole body, yet still embracing him as much as you can.

With a soft sob, you start inhaling his unique scent, grazing his soft skin with your fingers and letting the warmth blossom inside of your chest after feeling his rapid heartbeat beneath your palm.

"Don't leave me, please", he cries, the tears running down his flushed cheeks despite his desperate attempts of holding back, "let's do this whole love thing.”

You stand there for what feels like an eternity, just hugging each other, taking in each other's presence and calming down from everything that has happened in such a short time. You finally calm down completely, Kyoutani's soft touches and tiny kisses give you the last bit of energy you needed and for the first time in almost three months, there's not one demon in your head trying to make you overthink something.

Because this feels perfect; there's literally no other word to describe the feeling of holding Kyoutani Kentarou and being held by him.

But nevertheless, you've been on a constant adrenaline rush for the past four hours and the exhaustion has been killing you, making you grow tired a lot faster than usual.

"What about moving this to your room, hm? I'd rather fall asleep with you in your bed than against the door; especially because I know the boys are out and will be coming home soon", you say softly, lifting Kyoutani's head from the crook of your neck and looking at him.

He sighs and gives you a soft kiss, giving you a nod in response before he gets himself to let go of you; his warmth leaving with him and it's almost disgusting how you literally crave his presence.

After Kyoutani makes you drink two glasses of water to avoid the dehydration of your body, he hands you one of his thick hoodies and leaves you to get ready in his bathroom.

You come back to the sight of him sitting against the headboard of his king sized bed, his oversized shirt revealing the perfect amount of collarbones and you enjoy the sight of his pretty skin and the dark lines covering most of it as well as the way his sweats hug his strong thighs in the best way possible.

And as you watch his eyes lazily roam your body, a hot jolt of arousal finds its way through your veins and right to your cunt.

"Don't look at me like that, sweet girl", Kyoutani suddenly groans and cocks his head to the side, his tongue poking out to wet his lips before he gulps harshly; his eyes never once leaving yours.

"B-But Tani...", you reply, approaching him with tiny steps become you come to stand right next to his tall figure, feeling yourself growing needier because of the way your body is craving his touch now more than ever.

“Baby…”, he replies and gulps harshly, knowing your body better than yourself after weeks of getting to know you in a way nobody has ever before.

"Please, Tani...please, fuck me. I need to feel you inside of me. I've been waiting for so long...", you plead, your fingers coming to graze his pretty lips as memories of all the times he had turned you into a crying mess with those lips.

Kyoutani is just as affected by the change in tension as you, the slight bulge in his grey sweatpants as well as the hunger burning in his eyes giving him away.

"You're such a pretty angel girl, aren’t you?", he whispers and sits up, pulling you closer to make you stand in between his legs as he starts caressing your hot cheeks with his fingers.

“Yet you're saying all those naughty things”, Kentarou chuckles deeply, “imagine how people would react if they knew what a cockhungry little slut you actually are", upon hearing those degrading names, your cunt starts clenching around nothing and a high pitched whimper escaped your throat.

"For you...", you whisper, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth the second Kyoutani starts placing open mouthed kisses on your neck.

Your fingers dig into his shoulders, pulling the material of his shirt a little too tightly.

"Of course, baby, you're mine after all and this sweet cunt", the sudden feeling of his palm pressing against the damped fabric of your panties has you gasping for air, "belongs to me, and me only", Kyoutani grunts, pulling the skin of your neck between his lips before he starts sucking gently as well as slowly moving his fingers against the lacey fabric between your legs.

"Yes, it's yours", you reply, after several weeks of being intimate with Kyoutani you've learned one thing and that's how much he loves hearing you say all those dirty and lewd things, "please fuck me."

"Patience, my love, patience. I am going to fuck you", Kentarou replies calmly and suddenly pushes you away, his hands disappearing from your body and when your lid flutter open because of the lack of touch, he shoots you one of his cocky smirks, "but let's not forget the whole friend situation, hm? What about you make it up to me before I fuck you like the little whore you are?"

His words have excitement rush through your blood, your head literally spinning just from the thought of finally getting to be on the giving end after weeks of him playing the selfless lover.

You nod eagerly, anticipation sparkling in your eyes as you watch him palm himself over his sweats before you get on your knees and wait for him to let go of his now fully erect cock.

However, the more seconds pass by like this, the more nervous you become because for some reason you suddenly remember that you've basically never sucked dick before.

Your head shoots up with slight panic written all over your face and of course Kyoutani notices your change in demeanor right away.

"What's wrong, angel?", he asks you and stops the movements of his hands.

"I don't know how to do it, Tani", you whisper, knowing there's no point in being shy about it, after all he happens to be the guy you've experienced your most firsts with.

"It's okay, baby, I'm going to help you”, Kyoutani replies and actually loses his composure for a second, “fuck baby, don't look at me like this when I'm literally about to fuck your throat", he hisses, throwing his head back as he grunts and his hips desperately bucking into the air.

Kyoutani takes another deep breath before he finally pushes his hand underneath the waistband of his sweats and with your eyes focused on his movements, you watch him pull out his hard length, a soft hiss falling past his plump lips when the coldness of the room grazes the slightly wet tip of his cock.

You gulp harshly, his impressive size in girth as well as length has your pussy throbbing like crazy, yet you can't help but wonder how the hell he's going to fit inside of you.

“Don't worry, baby, I know you're going to take all of my cock like the good girl you are", Kyoutani says after observing your facial expressions for some time.

"Give me your hand", he asks you softly, his voice still raspy and incredibly hoarse yet still soothing and you appreciate his attempts to calm himself down so you won't feel too nervous. With your heart slamming against your rib cage, you lift your hand up and are slightly overwhelmed at the sudden feeling of Kyoutani's warm spit pooling inside your palm. Without adding anything, he straightens himself and motions you to stroke his hard cock.

Not once do you stop looking at him as you wrap your fingers around the base of his impressive length and slowly start jerking him off.

Kyoutani cocks his head to the side, his bottom lip pulled in between his teeth and his eyes constantly fluttering close.

"Start with the tip, angel- just wrap your lips around it and start sucking, but be careful with your teeth, yeah baby?", he grunts, his hips thrusting into your fist every time the pace of your strokes slows down.

You give him yet another nod before look up at him one more time and do as he says.

The feeling of his cock between your lips is – different.

It feels like it's not supposed to be there, yet the salty taste of his precum coating your tongue has you sighing softly. Your tongue darts out, giving his tip a tiny kitten lick before you go back to sucking on it eagerly.

And while you seem to enjoy it a lot, Kyoutani is going absolutely crazy. You can see the way he's tensing his body as his grip in the bed sheets tightens and the vein on his neck pops out.

"F-Fuck, baby, just like that", he praises you "now try to take more of it in a-and use your hand for the rest", Kyoutani's voice is shaky, his eyes are nervously roaming your swollen lips and the string of spit connecting them to the tip of his cock.

Without giving it another thought, you take a deep breath and take more of him, trying your best to not graze his sensitive cock with your teeth and despite your initial struggle, you still enjoy the feeling of his cock on your tongue.

You subconsciously wrap your fingers around the part of his cock which you can't fit inside your mouth and suddenly it's like your body knows exactly what to do.

Kyoutani's moans grow louder and the soft thrusts of his hips become a little less controlled. You look up at him every now and then, trying your best to keep the steady rhythm as you bop your head.

And then he suddenly thrusts his length all the way to the back of your throat, your gag reflex just about to go off when he pulls back which is the moment you take notice of the tears streaming down your cheeks.

You give him a soft smile before going back to wrapping your lips around his tip, but you don't get very far.

Kyoutani pulls you back, his grip on the back of your neck not firm enough to hurt you.

"I promise I'm going to fuck your throat properly and even cum in your mouth the next time we do this but right now I just can't stop thinking about that tight cunt of yours", he says, helping you get up and almost instantly pulling you onto his lap; his wet cock rubbing against your panty covered core as Kyoutani pulls you in for a kiss.

It's sloppy and rushed, the way his tongue grazes over yours before he pulls it between his lips and starts sucking at it. Your hips start moving against his cock, your sensitive pussy craving some kind of friction as the arousal has your head spinning like crazy.

You start moaning and whimpering into his mouth when Kyoutani’s hips start meeting your desperate movements, applying the perfect amount of pressure onto your needy clit.

You feel the knot in the pit of your stomach tightening, the clenching of your cunt becoming worse the more you hump Kyoutani's cock like a woman starved.

But nothing prepares you for the feeling of one of his large digits entering you. Your hole start clenching around his finger Kyoutani pushes another one in, both digits buried inside of your little cunt.

"Such a good girl for me, aren't you, baby? I'm going to finger you nice and slow so you're ready for my cock. Now come on, my love; show me what a good whore you are and ride my fingers", Kyoutani encourages you, his hot breath fanning against the sensitive skin behind your ear and without missing a beat, your hips meet the skillful thrusts of his fingers.

Kyoutani continues to whisper naughty things into your ear, his other hand eventually wrapping around your throat as he makes sure you look into his eyes when you stumble over the edge.

Your high hits you hard and fast, the intensity knocking the breath out of your lungs and leaving you gasping for it; something you should be used to by now yet still can't believe is even possible.

He pushes you off of his lap softly, helps you get rid of his shirt as well as your ruined panties before he makes you lay down in the middle of his bed; eyes locking with yours when he also starts undressing.

"My pretty girl", Kyoutani sighs, his hand caressing the soft skin of your thighs, spanking you every now and then just because he's absolutely obsessed with the way your whole body tenses whenever his hand meets your skin.

“Look at me", he orders and almost instantly your head shoots up to meet his gaze, the sight of his naked body distracting you a lot more than you expected but after all this is the first time you get to see the rest of his tattoos; the ones you usually only get a tiny glimpse of depending on his outfit choice.

Kyoutani spreads your legs apart, his eyes never leaving yours even when he starts jerking off again and you can't hold back the soft whimpers and begs leaving your lips.

But also something about his flushed cheeks and swollen lips as well as his messy hair falling into his face has you incredibly turned on.

"We've never talked about this before but are you on the pill, baby?", he asks, pushing one of his thumbs into his mouth before he brings it down to your clit and starts rubbing soft circles into it, making you arch your back off of the mattress as you bury your face in the pillow to keep your noises down.

"N-No", you whisper, a deep sigh coming from Kyoutani and even though you know you shouldn’t do it, you stop him from bending over to the drawer of his nightstand, making him look at you in confusion.

“But I still want you to raw me, please...", you add and gulp harshly when his whole body seems to go into some kind of haze once the words leaveyour lips.

Kyoutani looks at you, his eyes darkening even more as he pulls his bottom lip between his teeth and lets out a loud moan of your name.

"I can't just raw you, baby", he presses through gritted teeth, his mask slowly falling apart the more you rub yourself against his cock, "you've never had sex without a condom and my pull out game is weak, even weaker when it comes to you because fuck – the thought of filling you up with my cum sounds so fucking good", Kyou groans when you scoot up a little, taking his length into your hand before you line him up with your entrance.

"B-But what if you get pregnant, sweet girl?", he sighs and tries to pull away, making you wrap your arms around his neck as you look into his pretty eyes.

"That will just show everyone around us how well you've fucked me", you whisper and elicit another deep moan from him, his whole body shaking slightly as he tries to hold himself back from just pounding into you.

"Such a cockhungry whore", he hisses and – finally – starts pushing his fat cock into your tiny cunt, the slight stretch making you both gasp for air.

“If that's what you want, then that’s what you get, you little slut. I'm going to fucking raw you and fill you up with all of my cum, make you my cumslut", Kyoutani grunts, pulling your bottom lip between his teeth before he harshly grabs your face and looks into your eyes as he buries more of himself inside of you.

"F-Fuck, you're big", you whimper, throwing your head back and trying your very best to stop clenching around his cock.

“We're almost there, baby- you got this, s-stop clenching", Kyoutani grunts against your parted lips. Without a warning, Kyoutani pushes the rest of his huge cock inside of you, bottoming out completely.

“F-Fuck...you’re so– tight”, Kentarou grunts, his fingers digging into the flesh of your hips as he buries his face in the crook of your neck, “it’s like you’ve never been fucked before.”

“S-So good...so fucking good, nngh-”, your little whimpers and whines are slurred, barely coherent as the feeling of being filled to the brim pushes you into a haze of pleasure.

You feel the pulsation of his cock against your spongy walls, his hands nervously roaming your body and groping one of your tits, as he obviously tries to calm himself down.

And then he finally starts moving.

A deep, guttural moan leaves the both of you when he pulls himself out of your tight hole, dragging his huge cock along the walls of your little cunt in the most delicious way possible before he almost brutally shoves himself back in again.

“Mhm, just like that, you little brat”, he grunts, sitting up on his knees as he pushes your legs further apart, his eyes focusing the way his fat cock stretches your hole just how he’s been imagining it all this time, “coming up to me and talking about having your little cunt rawed like some cumhungry little whore.”

You start nodding almost instantly at his words, your brain barely recognizing them, the only thing you can focus on being the way the tip of his cock grazes the entrance to your womb with every harsh, brutal thrust of his hips.

His thrusts find a steady rhythm, hard and so, so deep.

“Open your mouth”, Kyoutani grunts, a single drop of sweat finding its way down the center of his tattooed chest, the sight making you whimper and whine for him even louder as you part your lips as soon as you process his words.

“You know what? I’d rather have you say it”, he suddenly hisses, pulling his cock out of your spasming cunt before he presses your legs together and shoves himself back inside of you with one skilled thrust of his hips.

You have no idea at what point you start crying but by the time Kyoutani's moans and grunts start picking up their pace, you're a sobbing mess.

“S-Say wh-what?”, you sob, hiding your tear and spit stained face behind your hands, not daring to look up at him.

“I want you to ask for my spit and beg for my cum”, Kentarou’s voice grows raspier, the dominance seething through every single one of his words makes it so easy for you to fall even further into the hole of absolute submission, “and stop hiding yourself, angel girl..I wanna watch the way I’m fucking your brains out.”

A row of loud, high pitched whines and a combination of sobs and moans are the only thing you manage to respond with, your brain clouded with the feeling of his thick cock dragging along the spongy walls of your cunt.

And before you can even comprehend his next movement, you hear the loud sound of skin meeting skin followed by the delicious feeling of a sting sending jolts of pain through your body, something you’ve come to love after so many hours with the tattoo artist.

“I told you to ask and beg for it, angel girl..you’re making me wait”, Kentarou spits, never once halting the movements of his hips as he watches the way you start sobbing even more, your cunt spasming around his cock after his painful spank.

“Please...f-fuck, please spit in my mouth and my face and on my cunt- want it all”, you start brabbling, another row of incohrent begs following right afterwars as your hips sloppily meet his harsh thrusts, “I want you to stuff me full of your cum, too- please, Daddy, wanna be your little c-cumdumpster.”

“There you go..”, Kyoutani’s plump lips stretch into a big smile as his cock throbs at the sound of that one forbidden little word he’s come to love even more after hearing it from you only a handful of times.

He didn’t hesitate to tell you about how much it turns him on around two weeks after the two fo you had started dating and even though he never really expected you to use it, he was secretely hoping for you to overcome your shyness.

You had used it only twice before when the pleasure had gotten too much for your brain to handle and Kyoutani knew you’d stop holding yourself back as soon as you got a taste of his cock.

“What did you just call me, pretty girl?”, he cooes, giggling softly at the way you whimper and cry even harder, knowing oh so well what he wants to hear.

And for the first time you just can’t get yourself to argue with the little voice in the back of your head; the feeling of his cock stretching your tiny cunt making it so, so easy to just let go of all those doubts and worries.

“Please, Daddy”, you reply and look into his eyes, groping your own tits as you arch your back to feel him even deeper inside of you, “n-need your cum inside of me...please- want everyone to know who I belong to.”

You don’t really expect it, yet your pussy almost instantly start clenching around his cock when kyoutani harshly grabs your face, making you part your lips before he spits into your mouth.

The loud, lewd sound of it rings in your ears in the best way possible and acting like a literal aphrodisiac in combination with the delicious taste of his saliva coating the hot muscle of your tongue.

You hum softly before you swallow it all, a gentle sob escaing your lips before you look up at him again.

"Now go on, angel girl”, he growls, pushing his hand in between your legs to rub circles into your hardened clit, “I want you to cum for me. Be a good little dumpster for your Daddy and show me what only I can do to you.”

You can barely process his words, the lewdness just fueling the fire in the pit of your stomach as you lose yourself in the feeling of your upcoming high. But you still start nodding, cringing at the feeling your saliva dripping down your jawline.

And with one last thrust, you feel your high crashing down onto you with such heaviness, you're left absolutely breathless.

Your whole body is trembling as the waves of your orgasm hit you, a row of incoherent words leaving your lips before you stop trying and just start crying for your precious Daddy.

"That's my baby”, is the first thing your brain manages to process again, everything still a blurry mess and when you look at Kyou, you realize you’re still cumming.

Your cunt is almost painfully spasming around his big cock, your juices dripping down the sides of his length as he helps you ride out your orgasm.

“You’re such a good, good girl for Daddy, aren’t you? I'm so proud of you", Kyoutani praises you, his thrust a little sloppier than before and from the way he's digging his fingers into the skin of your waist, you can only assume that he's also quiet close, "you're also going to take all of Daddy’s cum, right, baby? We gotta make sure I fill you up nicely..."

You take a deep breath, your slightly overstimulated cunt sending shivers down your spine as your eyes focus on Kyoutani's parted lips.

"Please, Daddy...need you to fill me up with your cum", you encourage him and when you slowly push two of your fingers into his mouth, knowing how much he loves to suck on them no matter what situation you’re both in, you finally get to see his whole face crunch up in pleasure.

His body tenses up as his grip on your waist becomes firmer before he starts cumming inside of you with a deep, raspy moan; coating the walls in several shades of white with three thick spurts of his cum.

Kyoutani buries his face in the crook of your neck as he slowly calms down, loud breathing and rushed gasps for air the only thing to fill the inside of his empty room.

"I love you so much", he whispers and gives you a soft kiss, his cock still firmly buried inside of your sensitive cunt before he shoots you a soft smile; looking almost boyish with his glossy eyes and flushed cheeks.

"I love you, too, D-Daddy”, you whisper, gulping harshly as the words leave your lips, feeling yourself grow even smaller underneath his strong yet comforting gaze, “thank you for giving us a chance", you add and pull him into for another kiss.

"Kyoutani Kentarou, your favorite group of walking disappointments is back and better than ev - oh", Iwaizumi Hajime, Kyoutani's High School best friend, fellow tattoo aritst and roommate suddenly yells and almost brutally slams open the door, startling you to the last bone in your body.

Kyoutani is quick to cover you up with his body, his hand reaching for one of the blankets on the floor as he grunts in annoyance.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't know–", "What is it, Iwa-Chan? Is he jerking off again? Kyoutani Kentarou you little piece of shit, just go and fuck that–", just like Iwaizumi, Oikawa – who also happens to be his best friend, felow tattoo artist and roommate – comes to stand in the doorway, bumping into his best friend before he finally spots the two of you.

"You're naked", he points out, closing his eyes almost instantly after realizing what he has just come to witness and despite the disgusting feeling of wanting to disappear and never come back again, you can't help but giggle at their shocked and slightly disgusted faces.

Kyoutani takes a deep breath and pulls out of you, still making sure to hide you behind his body before he hands you the blanket and lets his eyes shift to the door, looking at his best friends in pure disbelief.

"Kawa stop fucking staring and – can you two please fuck off?", he yells, pulling the boys back to reality and the way both of them shift to look at you only to blush from their necks to their ears has you chuckling softly.

This type of situation is nothing you’re not used to – unfortunately.

"Uhm – of course! Oh, my fucking God! So sorry, Kyou", Iwaizumi stutters and wraps his fingers around the doorknob, avoiding your eyes as much as he can before he pushes Oikawa away and then closes the door with another row of apologies.

Kyoutani just looks at you apologetically as he shakes his head and face palms himself, making the both of you burst into loud laughter.

And after taking a shower together and actually eating some late dinner with the boys, you fall asleep with Kyoutani's arms tightly wrapped around your waist, his face buried inside the crook of your neck and one last love confession.

And when those sweet words fall past his lips yet again, you realize – you're finally home.

[ banner source ]

#haikyuu smut #hq!! smut #kyoutani smut #kyoutani kentarou smut #hq smut #haikyuu!! smut #haikyuu x female reader #hq!! x female reader #kyoutani x female reader

[renaisaibaam]

interview

zhongli / female reader smut fic

degrading, dirty talking

idk how to tag lol

vvvv vulgar i am ashamed

"fuck, zhongli—" you moaned pathetically as you felt his cock slide into you in a slow, gentle pace that absolutely drived you insane, your breath shallow yet heavy, with your back pressed against the cold, wooden surface of your shared apartment's dining table. your boyfriend had just come home from a job hunt, and was expecting a call from one of the places he had visited, so to pass some time, he had decided to have his dinner almost immediately upon his arrival, his dinner being you, in the table instead of the bedroom, and with how im using this analogy to describe him just eating you out for his meal, its rather appropriate to have it in the dining room in this context.

his hands were underneath your thighs that were dripping with hot sweat, keeping them hoisted up as his hips moved slowly and steadily, whines leaving your lips from the fucking tease he was being. a scowl crosses his face, and he bends down to sink his teeth on the soft flesh of the underside of your thigh, not caring when you let out a pained yelp. he knew you liked the pain, anyways.

"arent you being a greedy little slut right now? do you want me to ruin you that bad?" he pulls out of your dripping cunt until only the tip of his cock is in, and without any warning, slams it back in until he's ball deep inside you, your back arching when you feel his cock hit the deepest parts of you. your hands move up to claw on his toned, almost rock hard arms, leaving red marks in your wake as tears filled the corner of your eyes from the pleasure of the sudden movement that he kept repeating without giving you time to even catch your own breath.

"didn't i teach you how to fucking wait? just how deprived are you from cock, when you've just had it last night?" he growls into your skin before rutting into your cunt in a rough pace, the unanticipated action making you scream his name in ecstacy. you were already in cloud nine by this point- zhongli filled you up so good; so well to where you wouldnt even think of anything else but him and his cock. he messed you up in the best ways possible, and you knew you could never go back once you had a taste of him.

you could hear the belt around his pants clinking to the pace of his thrusts inside you, and the cold metal slamming against the back of your thigh added to the many sensations you were feeling, considering he didnt even bother taking off his own clothes except for his coat and blazer while he stripped you off of everything, with the exception of his favorite sweater that you had worn, seeing how much of his scent lingered in the cozy, soft fabric of it. he loved seeing you in his clothes, but the hem of the sweater, however, was already up to your neck to expose your chest that had been bouncing to the rhythm of his hips. the cold air made your nipples hard, but you barely cared.

he bends down, cups your right breast with one hand, and swirls his tongue flat around your hardened bud, his other hand keeping your legs up in place. your hands that were adorned with sweater paws reached up to stroke his hair, and he looked up with a smile, moving towards you to lock your lips together in a heated kiss that held an overflowing amount of passion for each other. well, it was like that until a sudden ring of someone's phone interrupted your kiss with zhongli.

he pulls away with a string of saliva connecting you and him, and he grabs the ringing phone from his pocket, checking the number and immediately answering it, not pulling away from you as he spoke.

"hello?" he asks with his usual deep and calming voice, as if he hadn't been fucking you into oblivion just a few seconds ago. he puts the phone on loud speaker, and listens to the caller's voice closely.

"hi! this is from the wangsheng funeral parlor. do you mind if we conduct the interview over the phone so you dont have to come over? we're pretty busy at the moment with the influx of interviews." what a cockblock, you thought. just as you were about to pull away, zhongli stands up straight and grabs your hips with one hand, keeping you in place as he turned off the loud speaker and held the phone to his ear, speaking in the most professional voice that shook your core when it reached your ears.

"sure, i dont mind. lets proceed immediately."

you looked up at him with a face expecting him to release you, as he was slowly pulling away until he was out, but you let out a loud yelp when he suddenly slams back in to stuff you full of his cock, the rhythm of his thrusts still steady and deep despite the talking he was doing over the phone.

you couldnt believe it. zhongli was fucking you in the dining table as he had his motherfucking job interview. what would happen if this shit went wrong? you clawed at his arms to grab his attention and make him stop, but he just stared down at you, and was silent for what felt like eternity, before he gave a hard slap to the side of your exposed thigh, his thrusts only getting faster each time you resisted.

you were trying your best not to let out any sounds, but the way his cock was hitting on the spots that made you feel the best was sending you to euphoria. he made you feel so good almost without effort, and this situation in general just turned you on. what if the person on the phone could hear the sounds you made? what if they could hear just how much sounds your cunt was making from how much it had been dripping for him, and only him?

you could have sworn you had came twice or even more, and yet his interview hasnt ended despite you already meeting your release multiple times. and even when you did, he didnt stop for one bit. he had no plans to, anyways. as he spoke about what might be best for the company as an answer to the question, he leans down to mark the skin around your collarbone with a bite, sucking it as if he were to excrete something sweet if he did it hard enough.

you feel something different yet familiar bubbling up your abdomen, and you knew you were about to reach your orgasm again, and since you couldnt take any more of it, you mouth to zhongli to stop, or at least slow down, desperation in your expression. his bright eyes, which seemed to darken, stared down on you as still fucking spoke with annoyance dripping in his voice as he answers, "i think we can negotiate my salary based on my skills and the value i bring to the company."

this was enough to tell you that the interviewer asked a stupid question, and that he was pissed about it, yet remained cool headed despite it. and to take the frustration out, he places the phone between his ear and shoulder, grabs your legs and hoists you up even higher than what you were usually used to, and plunges his cock even deeper into you to the point where you can see his tip poking out from your stomach, the new and foreign feeling making you clench around his cock to which he lets out a low, and deep grunt at.

with only a look towards you as your single warning, he slams down into your tight cunt, the sudden pleasure coursing through your veins in a rush that leaves you feeling lightheaded. you cover your mouth with your hands and scream through the fabric of his sweater, feeling yourself reach your high and release for who knows how many times you did ever since the damned call, your hands shaking from the immense sensation and pleasure zhongli had brought you tonight.

all that had happened, and yet he didnt even fucking stop.

you were an overstimulated mess, and as a last resort, you whine loudly to try and grab his attention for who knows how many times, wanting this to be over already. you couldnt stand holding back your voice, and you knew itd do more harm if they had heard you. but zhongli wasnt having any of it.

he places you back down on the table with him still inside you, grabs his phone with his left hand to hold it up to his ear, and uses his right hand to wrap it around your throat, squeezing the sides in a way he knows you love so much. you gasp when you feel his huge, rough hand around you, and as if that wasnt enough, his hips slam back into you, driving you into a quiet, drooling mess. your eyes rolled back, and amidst the silence, your body shook violently to try and get him off of you, your hole unable to handle any more of the overstimulation he drove you into.

you feel your mind going blank and hazy from the emotions and feelings you had been experiencing. the fear of being caught, the excitement of trying not to get caught, the pleasure of his cock filling you up to the brim, the overstimulation and high of your recent orgasm, and the lack of oxygen is throwing you into an overwhelmed state, and yet here you were, living for it.

your hips shake, and you squirt into his cock, feeling your own release dripping down your legs as you made a mess on the floor and on zhongli's skin. you feel your legs give in and drop to his sides, looking up at him as he continued speaking as if you werent even there. but even if he was acting that way, his lust filled eyes stared at you hungrily, his tongue swiping his lips in a manner that you'd think was purposely trying to rile you up.

"okay, i understand. i'll come in tomorrow, so please take care of me." and with that, he ends the call, and growls lowly, placing the phone beside you. he lifts up your legs, and leans in until your face is just centimeters away from you, a low growl emitting fron him as he spoke.

"just how much did you cum in under 20 minutes? did you enjoy it knowing we could get caught?" his hips rocks itself into you deeply, and stays in that position, your hips shaking. you could feel him fill you up to where your abdomen felt full of him and only him, and you looked up at him, whining at his words.

"fucking whore. you even made a mess on me. did it feel that good, doll?" he opens his mouth and crashes his lips on to yours, quickly moving down to bite the skin around the side of your throat where his hands once were, leaving marks on both sides. he moves up to whisper on your ear, his voice making you tremble as you felt his hot breath whispering such dirty words that you knew he was going to fulfill. guess you were staying at home tomorrow.

"ill make sure you cum all over my cock more tonight, so be a good girl and take me in well. are we clear?"

#genshin impact #genshin impact zhongli #genshin impact smut #zhongli x reader

[matchamabs]

I know you didn’t ask for it but- BOTW MONSTERS: RANKED BY HOW HOT THEY ARE,,,,

i do fuck all in the days lemme tell ya

ill admit i havent done EVERY enemy but like. i do enjoy making these posts so who knows, i might actually rank everything sooner or later 🤷‍♀️

,,,,, and if u want a specific ranking of botw/aoc stuff lmk 👀

ahh the ol reliable. the classic bokoblin. he is just a little lad! unfortunately they’re genuinely kind of ugly??? and the idk the singular horn in the middle aint a good look. i see cute comics abt these guys being domestic and thats adorable but also giving them so much leeway bc they’re really Not that cute. not sure what the loincloth is hiding and im not sure i wanna know anyway. 3/10 really kind of. not good. 

slightly bigger loincloth only means slightly bigger things to hide :( i rlly hate these guys noses and whatever the fuck toenails they have why do they have toenails?????? s’bad. the thing is tho they have the proportions of a potentially attractive gerudo which is probably what takes the edge off the general vibes of... u know... being an abomination. its also only JUST occured to me as im writing that these guys r just evolved bokoblins so. glow up i guess. 6/10 what that tongue do

ok bypassing whatever the fuck rule 34 has done to these guys, i actually dig them. i find the huge fat ones way cuter than the lil bug eyed ones. in their case theres rlly no, like... hotness about them. its just cute. i think they’re cute. any monster that is cute and also doubles up as a bed gets my vote 7/10 get urself a fella as flexible as these guys 

u know what, im gonna say it, these guys r actually kinda hot. proportions arent super bad, the face aint bad and generally they have good vibes. aside from, u know, when they’re tryna shank u. id say one of the most bearable monsters to have to look at. 8/10 im not a scalie

??????????? idk what to say. u could tie these little shits to like swingball poles and beat them with rackets thatd b good. aside from that these guys have like no redeeming qualities. they’re a pain in the ass and not in a good way. 3/10 cute but like. is it worth it?

i mean,,,,,,,, someones probably into it. i dont like these guys for a lot of reason and surprisingly the thing that gets me is the fucking hair why does it have that hair its like he-man just went straight over the top with an electric razor its not a good look!!! stop trying to make it work! it wont! and again with the loincloth??? im not into it. the only thing i like abt these guys is the lil waistcoats. they have some amount of decency (but the implications it makes are Not Good). uh. 2/10. barely.

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

,,,,,9/10. but if you see a lynel up close like that chances are you died about half a minute ago

again. ??? i dont rlly like. i mean. im digging the top heavy proportions? its got the same body type as kass so like. 4/10. bit plain around the features but what can u do. i dont understand how but the igneo taluses are like. sexier 

UGHGHHH I FUCKING HATE THESE THINGS okay okay okay like these motherfuckers lure u in by being quite cute and dancin around and then u get a look at their faces and its like fucking JESUS and its even WORSE when you see under their cloak and they have no necks????? and like????? they do that gay little fucking dance that pisses me off???? they’re wearing hoods that give the ILLUSION that they have necks and im im fumin ok i HATE it i hate it i have been betrayed and i will NEVER FORGET ABOUT IT UGHGHGHG I HATE THESE CUNTS -10000000000000000000000000000000000/10 die

hhhhh i just dont like em. theyre too annoying to be cute now. and whats gonna happen if i squeeze one? is like. water gonna come out? r they just gonna deflate? 4/10 tentacles are not hyrules forte it seems ://

trust kohga to send the twinks out on the front line. seriously. they’re not bad tho? kinda small and underwhelming :((( tho i give extra points for the good crazy laugh we love a good manic cackle 6/10 they dont really count as monsters but ah well where else am i gonna put em

now THATS what im talkin about babeyyyyy we love the muscles,,,,, the posture,,, the stride,,, we love it when u fuck up stealth and a torrential downpour of these motherfuckers come down to beat ur ass,,,,, 9/10 its raining men 😎

u know. u dont rlly like. get a good view of these guys when ur balls deep in a battle with them, but the more i get like closer looks at them the more i go ???? like idk. everything about them looks backwards and wrong. but as far as backwards and wrong goes its not a bad look and the boss theme is a banger so 4/10 maybe dont jump on my ass every time i step one foot onto the desert :/

i just. i dont dig it. idk why. aside from the fact they’re a monumental pain in my ass, and now everytime i hear a beep even slightly resembling a guardian i shit my pants, but. idk??? as far as robots go its not like. terrible. they’re like the milfs of robots. the milves, if u will. a rilf. except i wouldnt. so its more like riwlf. but even that leaves too much up to interpretation so im just gonna call em a cunt and go. 4/10 leg game strong

here we are,,, the big boys,,,, waterblight isnt too bad i will admit, but the spear hand is both annoying and mildly inconvenient. its got a rlly big chest but rlly thin arms?? also not sure how i feel abt the strap on beard but oh well its not like ganons got taste. 5/10 kind of average for a blight i think

a hefty motherfucker. a chunk of a lad. big large. the fact this is like one of the easiest blights makes it more forgiveable to me but like whatever its got going on with the 80s hair needs 2 be sorted out. i like its moves but it doesnt hang upside down like waterblight :((( 5/10 calm down kate bush

ok who doesnt like gun arms. and a gun back. this things like fuckin megatron. the whole face plate thing doesnt look bad either. honestly its kind of a look? but its dickheadery in aoc makes me wanna set shit on fire so :// 6/10 hot but will not leave u alone 😔

ok this one is by FAR the sexiest of all the blights. i just cant explain it. i like guys with bad posture. i had an easy time beating it but apparently its given other people a lot of grief and that makes it 10x more sexy to me lmaooo. also it can clone itself which is like. thats a win. 8/10 ganon spilt all the sexy juice into this one

ok i didnt realise how many arms this motherfucker has and the whole hairline behind the ears thing is not a great look. especially w the beard. in fact the longer i look at it the less sexy it becomes tbh. 3/10 they tried to make arachnophobia sexy and it didnt work

10/10 i will be taking questions in my inbox but i wont be taking constructive criticism and you cant make me 

#botw #breath of the wild #aoc #age of calamity #calamity ganon #ganon #loz #legend of zelda #hyrule warriors age of calamity #hyrule warriors aoc #windblight #thunderblight #waterblight #fireblight #yiga #i ran out of ppl to rank and then i went wait-- #;)

[nyan-koii]

Hashira ft. Sabito as genshin impact players

aunotes : Bad grammar ahead! I didnt proofread it so be aware of brain damage. plus i initially wrote it at the 1.6 update

PART 1 : T.Muichiro, R.Kyojuro, K.Shinobu, S.Sanemi, U.Tengen 

Muichiro : he probably would be uninterested at first. He's more to first person shooting game or anything other than this concept of farming or investing. So that's why when he saw yuichirou banging his fist on his desk, trying to get his fav character, he would simply just watch

"Fck this game, i've had enough,"

"But you havent finish your wishing things yet,"

Stares. "How about you give it a try mui. You might get the character i want,"

"You sure about that? You might get angry at me," "better than nothing. Now go go, get em you donkey,"

His first ten pulls on the game brings out a light we all want to see

"Eh is tha-" "AAAA A FUCKING 5 STAR FCK FCKFCK,"

Apparently, it was one of the luckiest wish yuichiro had ever seen so far

"OHMYFUCK, you GOT A GODDAMN KLEE, QIQI AND SUCROSE WTFF???"

"I think i get your fav character?"

"Yeahh!! More than that to be honest. I want klee but you brought me two more person," sniffles and cries "you're really lucky mui. You should try and play the game,"

"It's probably the system. I doubt im that lucky tho,"

Nah, he really is lucky. Apparently he wished for his friends and got what they all really wanted for so long

"Thank you for getting me the aquila favonia, muichiro,"

"It's nothing really. I just simply press the button. It might be the system that's giving you the thing you want when i wish,"

"But still, even if i were to wish, i can get really scared and paranoid over it,"

"That's bad. You shouldnt invest yourself that much in the game tanjiro. It's just a game,"

"Ehehehe, i guess so. But you're really good at it muichiro! If you download it, we can play together :D!"

!!!!

It took the word "play together" to get muichiro down on his knee for that game. Usually the idea of playing with your friends is not that interesting. So when tanjiro said that, you bet he's going to play it

Type of player

Extremely lucky it's not even real. He got a five star on the beginner's banner

Fast farming. He probably will complete all the quest and become an endgame player within one month

"I just wanted to play with tanjiro..." bashfully

He's really good with whatever he's doing. Attack combo, dodging, elemental reaction and all sorts of stuff. If he invest more of his time on artifacts, he would probably even one shot it!!

He's very lucky. Very

Kyojuro : he wouldnt even know the existence of this game. Well, he took a glimpse of it one day and boom, heart stolen. Maybe it was the fiery burning passion in bennett that made him play the game.

'oh wow!! What a determined young boy! Even though he has a very bad luck he still keep pushing forward! Amazing!!'

'I want to be like him'

Kyojuro's the type of player to read and pay attention to every single lore of his fav character. Bennett, oh my how he wish he could've had bennett in his team. Every wishes he made would make him a c6 bennett main if only barbara wont stop coming home

"I really like you barbara but i dont want you!! Thank you for the c6 though!! I promise to use you in the future but just-" he prepares to wish

"not NOW!!" Clicks

The highest con of bennett he had ever gotten is probably c1. One day the paimon's bargain shop offered bennett as their monthly character. Kyojuro had never been so excited over a game before. He usually perks up over academics and not this kind of thing. But it's bennett, the character he admires the most.

Unfortunately he couldnt get it due to low currency. He had never feel so sad in his life.

"I shall not give up. Dont worry, i will be a c6 bennett main!!!"

He will be a c6 bennett haver!!

Type of player :

Carefully reads every stories and listens to their lines attentively. He finds it amazing how the company spent their everything on this game. It amazes him. From the stories, lores and lines, he truly appreciates it.

Balance his team pretty well. He mains bennett so he doesnt need that much of a healer in his team.

Enjoys bennett's hangout very much!! He tried to not get him killed by the dungeon's trap but ended up having to sacrifice him which ultimately ends the route. He had never felt so down and guilty before.

Not much of a damage dealer. He prefers to play it in normal mode and doesnt care that much about one shotting monster.

He feeds his character three meals a day!! If only there's a sleep option, he would be sending bennett to sleep first before the rest.

Everyone loves his teapot

Shinobu : found the game while she's scrolling through the app store out of boredom. Initially she played it on her phone but due to the fps and a really bad ping, so bad that douma wouldnt find her interesting anymore, she finally downloaded the game on her pc where things has starting to get real

"Ara, shinobu chan, it's lunch time already. Come downstairs please,"

"Sis give me five more minutes, JUST FIVE PLEASE I NEED TO KICK CHILDE's ASS,"

"he's not going anywhere sweetie,"

"yEAHH BUT MY BP IS,"

'Bp?'

"DIE DIE DIE!!" Aggresive clicking intensifies

"Shinobu chan dont hurt the keyboard that much!!"

She got lucky on the beginner's banner too and pulled a 5 star along with bennett and noelle. Who's the 5 star? Diluc Ragnvindr in all of his glory. Shinobu benched him sadly. She prefers sword over any other weapon

"I mean he's cool i guess but i just really dont get that 'WOAHHH COOL' vibe from him you know?"

"then give your diluc to me! I really want him so bad shinobu chan!"

Deep sighs "yeah sure. You can have my c2 diluc mitsuri..."

Loses 50/50 to diluc everytime everyone would think she either is lucky or cursed by the amount of that man greeting him on the screen. She still bench him though, sadly

"Im begging you, give me jEANN THE GRANDMASTER I NEED HEALER iN MY PARTY TO DO ABYSS

Type of player :

Suffers a lot in the abyss because she just want the primos which is a valid reason to do because that's the only thing that keeps her going

She's a sword character main. She'll properly build every character as either support or dps. The support would be kaeya and bennett, and her main dps ayaka

Ayaka main btw

Honestly at some point she wanted to quit the game because of how tiring it is but then inazuma came out

Fragile resin = 0

Resin = 160/160 happens once in a blue moon

"i should probably control myself with the amount of resin i've used,"

"But i cant,"

Hates domain but always can be seen playing in there

Only coops if mitsuri is there

"So that someone can calm me down,"

"That's not a really good reason shinobu chan,"

Sanemi : dude probably know the game through obanai. He watched the latter play and finds it interesting on how high the numbers he dealt. He loves challenges so a game like genshin impact would probably satisfy his need.

"Obanai, are you hearing this shit?"

"What is it sanemi, im busy doing this event,"

"That loser giyuu is also playing the game,"

"Oh yeah i know,"

"YOU KNOW? WHY YOU DIDNT TELL ME??"

"i just know right after you told me,"

"...."

Sanemi's a meta but a mediocre one. He's meta but he doesnt show it that much. Probably buys welkin once in every three months or when he really needs it same goes with battle pass too. Honestly, he really just use his money when he really needs something

"Donno if my allowance can buy me a welkin so i'll probably skip,"

"But the next banner is zhongli's,"

"....."

"Ah fuck it," buys

My man cant dodge after he got zhongli. Its very painful because he used to studies the enemies movement in the early game so that he can utilizes it on the team but zhongli's shield is so tank he forgot that dodging exists

"Im gonna kill you and you and you hhahaahhaah just you wait im gonna shred all of yo- oh shit zhongli's shield. puT IT BACK PUT IT BACK ON,"

That one event where zhongli's shield plays an important role in the domain? Yeah, he felt like a god at that time. Even got his c2 on his rerun. Sanemi just really like zhongli because it kinda reminds him of himejima. Calm and wise and strong too. He looks up on that kind of person

"Zhongli sama, im in debt for all of your hard work protecting my team," bows and wipes tears

Type of player :

Spends a little money on the game to get what he wants

Zhongli main

Is that one player that has hoards of food but doesnt even use it

"Why need healer when you have zhongli's shield,"

Compare to kyojuro, he doesnt even touch the teapot because he finds it ridiculous and bothersome to create and design everything in it

Loves one shotting bosses and compares it to giyuu. He ask for advices from obanai regarding team build supports and stuffs

Doesnt do character's story quest. The key is full every single time. He unlocks it but leaves the quest like that.

"Ah shit, i accidentally activate the quest,"

His friend list only has obanai in it. Whenever people sent him friend request, he wouldnt hesitate, more like wouldnt care to accept it

They either have to coop in obanai's world or his world and after that, unfriend immediately

Says thank you after coop because he has manners and then completely disappears

"Zhongli main forever,"

Tengen : played since 1.0 this madlad has been staying loyal to the game ever since. Quite huge amount of money he spend on this game to be honest but he never gets broke by it. You can see his regular donation to the game by purchasing welkin and battle pass and some genesis crystal too. He's loaded with money, he didnt know what to do with it.

Uzui also plays honkai impact and guns girl Z so when he saw the unknown god at the intro , he was not surprised.

"Oh we have to pick between the siblings? Cool cool co- oh hi kiana,"

"Thats so herrscher of void hahahahah,"

Although he is a loyal fan to MihoYo games, he lost his composure when he saw the 1st genshin anniversary reward because what was that. Imagine getting billions of money and they give us this? Tengen cant believe this shit

"Oh god wtf was that reward, i have to draw to get a welkin and some primos?? aND I ALSO HAVE TO BE LUCKY? WHAT-"

"WHERE'S MY FREE MONA,"

In need of mona. He needs mona so bad he literally spent his money on standard banner to get mona but always ends up with qiqi. Not that he's complaining but he just wants the astrologist to complete the support team

"GOD QIQI YOU AGAIN? WTF WFF WTF-" converts genesis crystal to primigems

"Tengen, you should control yourself!"

"SHUT UP KYOJURO, IM GONNA WASTE MY MONEY TILL I GET HER,"

"yeah but my f2p ass is hurting with how many bennett cons you got," droops

Tengen sees potential in every character. Everyone has their weakness and strength so when kokomi comes out, he diss her at first but then realize maybe its a new way for a character. Adds the uniqueness if he may say so.

"Meh i dont care honestly. You guys should pull whoever you find nice or beautiful. Like me ;)"

"Who do you main uzui?"

"Beidou,"

Type of player

Spoils the storylines, lores, leaks A LOT THE REST HAVE TO BLOCK HIM ON SOCIAL MEDIA

Speed runs the game and has become an endgame player ever since but he still does his daily commission and helps people with domains and stuffs

R5 every battle pass weapon

Fights azhdaha for fun and to test out his characters rather than ruin guards and stuff

Mona wanter

Puts traveller as the pfp and doesnt display any showcase of his characters and namecards. You can only see his achievements and spiral abyss ( 12-3 ). Says its for fun and mystery

Throws a lot of pickup lines and roleplays a lot. Spams your chatbox messages with stickers and censored stuffs

Probably steals your ores and exotic things like violetgrass, qingxin and silk flowers

Screams in the chatbox whenever he saw Mona until Kyojuro had to calm him down

Changes signature every single time and sometimes put spoilers in it

In every survey he would complain "MihoYo where the fuck is my Mona,"

Doesnt heals his characters

#demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer hashira #kny hashira #tokitō muichirō #shinazugawa sanemi #shinobu kochou #uzui tengen #rengoku kyojuro #kamado tanjiro #kochou kanae #iguro obanai #demon slayer headcanons #kimetsu no yaiba headcanons #hashira headcanons