the story of us
summary: Five times Kate Sheffield and Anthony Bridgeton were just friends and one time they were more.
chapter 1: if one thing had been different, would everything be different?
Kate Sheffield and Anthony Bridgerton meet at Oxford University.
They’re both studying law and business, and they’re in the same college of the many in their university. They have nearly identical schedules, which usually resulted in heated debates in most of their lectures. They’re partnered up for seminars for their first semester, which means an hour a week the two of them and a tutor spend an hour discussing readings, essays and of course, arguing further.
Oddly enough, after a month of arguing and bickering, they sort of become best friends.
They lived in the same accommodation, a co-ed accommodation which Kate had thought was scandalous at first, but it ends up being amazing. They form a friend group in their course, and they all live together. It's sort of perfect, really. Kate had had friends in school, but she had never had a friendship group like this or a best friend like Anthony. For the first time, she felt like she truly belonged.
They still argued constantly, much to the amusement of their friends, but they also knew each other’s coffee orders and why he’s scared of bees and she’s scared of thunderstorms.
He’s the first boy-friend Kate has ever had, and she’s definitely his first platonic girl-friend as he seems to sleep with the rest of them.
They’re completely different, yet they understand each other. He’s a Bridgerton, an Oxford legacy with an actual title, and she’s a Sheffield from a small town in Somerset on a scholarship to Oxford. He went to Eton, she went to her local secondary school.
They spend their first year at university either in the library, in their rooms or drunk in a club or pub. Always together.
“So, you and Anthony,” Her friend, Anna, commented as they walked to class one chilly December day. Anthony was up ahead with some of the lads, the group of them laughing loudly and occasionally shoving each other. Kate had decided a while ago she would never fully understand the male species.
“Yes?” Kate asked, turning to raise an eyebrow at Anna. She knew what Anna was implying, it wasn’t the first time she had been asked about it and it was only December.
“You’re quite close,” She commented further, grinning at Kate as she opened up the Law building’s door.
“We’re good friends,” Kate shrugged, feeling her cheeks heat up. “That’s all.”
“The way he looks as you doesn’t seem that friendly to me,” said Anna, nudging Kate with her hip. Anna had long blonde hair, pale skin and a wide smile. She was also very petite. Kate was the opposite.
Kate was tall, around 5’10, which people oddly liked to to remind her about a lot. As if she wasn't aware of it. She was lucky she had never suffered from acne, bar the occasional stress spots, so her skin was clear and smooth. She had long, dark thick hair. It never stayed straight and was always knotted, so she usually just let it lie down her back. She had met the girls Anthony typically went for and she didn’t fit the picture.
Kate had long accepted that and wouldn't entertain the idea any further.
“He doesn’t look at me like anything,” Kate rolled her eyes, feeling her throat closing up slightly as they walked into their lecture hall and took a seat in the middle. “He saw me puke my guts out last week, so it’s fair to say he’s not looking at me like anything.”
She had gotten far too drunk on a night out last Thursday and she could still feel her hangover. It had been a particularly stressful day with a bad grade on an essay and a harsh feedback session from a tutor. She had embarrassingly burst into tears when Anthony had stopped by her room to go to dinner, and he held her as she cried and called their tutor a twat.
He then suggested they all go out. She had apparently danced on top of tables, attempted to take most of her clothes off (and was stopped from doing so) and then passed out. Anthony had carried her home. Not that she remembered anything, most of the night was a blur.
She was never drinking tequila again.
“He was the one holding your hair back,” Anna gave her a pointed look, raising her eyebrows. “I’m just saying, I think you two would be good together. Kate and Anthony has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?
Before Kate could object, she felt someone appear sit down beside them. “Hey,” A voice appeared beside them and Kate nearly jumped, looking at Anthony. He was wearing a grey jumper and jeans, his nose red from the cold outside. “What are you talking about?”
“What we’re wearing to the Law ball,” Anna replied swiftly, and Kate let out a sigh of relief that her friend had stopped talking. The Law Ball was being held next weekend, just before the term ended for Christmas and all assignments were over.
“Oh,” Anthony said, taking out his laptop and logging into it. “Well, Kate, you should wear something that’s hard to get out of. I don’t think the law society will take kindly to one of its members stripping in the middle of the dancefloor.”
“Fuck off.” She elbowed him as Anna burst out laughing, and Anthony grins at her. She can’t help but laugh too even if she’s mortified.
After Christmas, when they’re back at university and exams are over, he teaches her how to drive. Mary, her step-mother and the only mother she’s ever had, never learned, and everything had been within walking distance back home. She had never had the chance to learn. She had got the train to university when she’d moved, and you walked everywhere. Anthony always had his car with him as he went home a lot to see his siblings and mother.
When he finds out she can’t drive, he insists on teaching her. “I’ve taught two of my siblings. Including Colin. If I can teach Colin, I can teach anyone.”
They’re about ten minutes into it before they start arguing.
Kate had never thought driving could be so stressful.
“I am clutching!” She shrieked, pushing the pedal forward as her ankles began to ache.
“Fuck me-brake, Kate!”
“Stop shouting at me!”
She pulls up the handbrake so hard she’s surprised she didn’t break it, and gets out of the car and refuses to get back in. They had gone to a retail park with a largely empty parking lot to practice in. He eventually convinces her to get back in the car, after apologizing numerous times, and he’s a lot nicer as she gets behind the wheel again.
Her birthday is in March, and he gets her driving lessons. They’re ridiculously expensive, and she initially refuses to accept them for a week. They argue about it, money has never been an object to him and it’s something she’s never had much of, so their perspectives are different.
She eventually accepts them and thanks him, after he insists for the twentieth time he didn’t mean it in any way other than to help her and so he would never have to teach her. She really wanted to be able to drive, to be able to afford a car eventually and drive home to Mary and Edwina more. She did warn him if he ever spent more than 20 pounds on her again, she’d murder him.
It’s the start of May when she passes her test, and he’s waiting for her outside the centre. He twirls her around as she runs towards him, shouting she’d passed, and they get McDonalds to celebrate. She thanks him for everything, and he shrugs it off because he’s Anthony. They do celebrate with their friends in the pub later that evening, and she gets very drunk, but their McDonalds that afternoon will hold a special place in her heart.
She’s beginning to think he always will, too.
Her dad’s memorial service is on a Sunday in June. It had been five years since he died, five years of missing him and him missing everything. Her graduating school, her getting into university, her first day at university. Kate planned to get the train back home for the day and get the last one back this evening. She had two exams on Friday and Saturday so she couldn’t have gone home earlier, and she couldn’t miss any of her tutorials or lectures tomorrow. A part of her was relieved, she didn’t want to stay at home. It was too sad and university was a good distraction.
It was far too early to be awake on a Sunday, it was 7am, but she had to be home before twelve for the service and the train was two hours.
Her phone buzzed, and she glanced at the whatsapp messages that appeared on her screen.
Anthony: i’m outside
Kate raised an eyebrow at the text, grabbing her bag and heading downstairs, outside their accommodation. She walked out onto the road, eventually spotting him. “Anthony?”
“Hey,” He said, smiling at her. He was leaning against his car, his hands in his pockets. “We better hit the road. We’ll need to stop at a Starbucks drive through as well, I need caffeine.”
Kate stared at him, unsure of what to say or what was going on. He had been the person she had mentioned it to out of their friends, that she wouldn’t be around on Sunday. “What do you mean? I’m going to my dad’s service.”
“I know Kate,” He said softly, opening the passenger side door for her. “I figured I’d drive you. I don’t want you to be alone, so I thought I’d come. I know how hard today can be, so,” He shuffled his feet awkwardly, clearly very uncomfortable. “If it’s okay, that is. If you don’t want me to come, I can go.”
She stared at him. “Oh Anthony,” She half sobbed, completely breaking down and throwing herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck. It was probably the nicest thing someone had ever done for her. She hadn’t realized how much she had needed someone until she saw him in front of her. She squeezed him tightly, pushing the tears back that were brewing under her eyelids. “Thank you.”
She hadn’t had to ask, he was just there. That was Anthony Bridgerton.
“It’s okay,” He murmured, squeezing her back before she removed herself off him, half sniffling. Anthony had never handled emotional women well. “Let’s go? You have music privileges but if I hear one one direction song, they’re gone.”
“As if you don’t already know the lyrics and like them,” Kate teased, climbing into the car and putting on her seatbelt.
“I have three younger sisters,” He grumbled, flicking a glance at the rearview mirror as he pulled out onto the road. “Of course I know the lyrics.”
It’s a long and hard day, but she feels better when Mary, her stepmother, her mum, opens their front door and hugs her. Edwina squeals as she runs towards Kate, hugging her tightly.
“Hey guys,” Kate said, smiling as she stepped aside and gestured awkwardly to Anthony. “This is my friend from university, Anthony.”
“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Anthony said, oddly formal as he extended his hand. “I’m so sorry for your loss.”
“Thank you. It’s a pleasure to meet you too,” Mary said, smiling at Anthony as she gestured to them to come inside. “Come in! We can have some tea and biscuits before we head off.” She shot Kate an amused smile behind Anthony’s back, who was being lead into the kitchen by a chattering Edwina.
Kate ignored Mary, because she knew that look and there was no look needed. There was nothing going on between her and Anthony.
The memorial is long, and quite sad. Anthony puts his arm around Kate at one point, when she can’t hold her tears, silently streaming down her cheeks. There’s a small lunch at the local pub afterwards, which Kate spends mostly talking to old friends of her fathers and familiar faces she hadn’t seen since she had left for university.
Kate takes Anthony on a walk down the pier, where she spent most of her childhood hanging out with her friends. “I had my first kiss there,” She pointed at the edge of the pier where there were a few steps that led to the sea. “I had my first drink there as well. I remember how disgusted I was about how disgusting beer was. All that hype for it to taste like piss.”
Anthony snorted, licking his lips as he tried to keep up with his melting ice cream. His face was a mess, a few sprinkles at the edge of his ice cream stained mouth. “Very romantic. So this is where the Kate Sheffield came to be?”
“It is indeed. Here,” She chuckled, stopping in her tracks as she reached up to wipe his white stained mouth softly. “You’re very messy.”
He was staring at her as she wiped his mouth, and her brain had only caught up with her actions a few moments later. She was touching his face, her hand on his cheek as she wiped his mouth.
His perfectly, slightly rose tinted lips.
“Oh my god! Kate!” Her old school friend, Ophelia Nixon, who had gone to university in Nottingham screeched as she ran up to Kate and hugged her. Kate introduced Anthony and they made polite conversation before Kate said they better head back as they had a long drive ahead of them.
The moment between her and Anthony had come and gone as quickly as it had happened. Neither of them acknowledged it.
Kate shook her head, thinking she was being ridiculous. There wasn’t a moment, of course there wasn’t.
“I like him,” Mary said later that evening, hugging Kate at the doorstep as her and Anthony were about to leave. Anthony had already said goodbye, and he was waiting in the car to give the Sheffields a private moment.
“I like him too,” Kate said, giving her mother a pointed look. “As a friend.”
“Of course dear,” Mary brushed Kate’s thick hair out of her eyes, winning at her. “It was lovely to see you, darling. Safe drive home. I love you a lot.”
“I love you too,” She hugged Mary one last time, before moving to hug her sister.
“I hate when you go,” Edwina murmured, wrapping her arms around her sister tightly. “You should bring back boys more. Especially ones who look like that.”
“What?” Her sister replied innocently, but she was smirking. “He definitely likes you.”
“I love you,” Kate said pointedly, ending the conversation as she pulled away from her sister. “I’ll call you both later.”
“Love you,” Edwina was laughing, waving in her and Anthony’s direction. “Bye Anthony!”
Anthony looked up and waved as Kate groaned, turning to give her a sister a murderous glare as she climbed into the car.
“You okay?” Anthony asked as Kate waved at her mother and sister’s fading figures as they drove off.
“Yeah,” She said, that feeling of sadness still aching slightly in the pit of her stomach. The years passed, and it got slightly easier, but it would always hurt. She smiled at him. “Thank you for today.”
“Of course,” said Anthony, returning her smile before focusing back on the road as they sat in a comfortable silence. Kate felt herself dozing off, the events of the day catching up on her, but as she fell asleep thinking about how much her dad would have liked Anthony.
Siena Rosso comes into the picture at the start of their second year. Kate doesn’t understand their relationship, if it even is a relationship, and deep down she knows she doesn’t want to understand. She prefers to not think about it, prefers to not think about that gut wrenching feeling in the pit of her stomach when she sees them together.
Besides, Siena is nice. She’s studying drama in the year below them. She’s witty, gorgeous, has no problem putting Anthony in his place and Kate understands why he likes her. She’s absolutely nothing like Kate.
Kate had never had much experience with boys, something she had long come to terms with in school and was once aware of again in university. It did happen, she had more opportunities in university-it just didn't happen a lot. Boys didn’t seem to gravitate towards her and she never got asked out on dates. It just wasn’t something that happened to her.
Edwina had even gotten a boyfriend long before Kate had.
She’s at a party one night in October, and Anthony isn’t there. Kate had been trying to make more of an effort with people outside of their friendship group and particularly people who weren’t Anthony. He had a life outside of her, and she would have one outside of him. She was invited by Poppy, a girl she had met in one of her history electives.
She gets paired up with Simon Basset for beer pong at the pre-drinks, and they were getting on very well. She didn’t know him at all, she only knew of him from Anthony. They had gone to Eton together, but Kate hadn’t met him until tonight. Anthony had been good friends with him for years, but hadn’t thought to introduce Kate or invite her whenever him and Simon met up.
“I’m Simon,” He introduced himself as grinned at her. “I really don’t like losing at beer pong.”
“Good thing I don’t lose,” Kate replied swiftly, smirking right back at him.
They walk to the club together and he gives her a piggyback when she complains her feet hurt. She puts up an instagram story of Simon and her winning beer pong and another of them smiling at the camera.
She ignores Anthony’s reply to her story, and she drinks more.
When she's on her third drink, Kate decides her and Simon were flirting. They were definitely flirting.
“What course did you say you were in again?” Simon shouts over the music, his hands lingering on her waist.
“Law,” Kate shouts back at him, leaning up slightly to speak in his ear.
“Ah! Do you know Anthony Bridgerton?”
"Yeah!" Kate tries to contain the grin that forms on her face the minute he's mentioned. "He's one of my best mates."
“Wait,” said Simon, the grin on his face completely disappearing. “You’re Kate?”
“Yeah,” She said, raising an eyebrow slightly at Simon's fallen face. “Has he mentioned me?”
“I can’t do it, I’m sorry,” Kate looks confused and Simon sighs, shaking his head. “I can’t do it to Anthony.”
“What? Can’t do what?” said Kate, raising an eyebrow. “Oh! No, no. We’re just friends!”
“I still can’t,” Simon insisted, actually taking a step back from her. Did Eton breed these boys to be so dramatic? “Believe me, I want to, but I can’t. Bro-code.”
“That’s ridiculous. Wait, did he say something to you?” Kate asked, raising an inquisitive eyebrow at him and feeling quite infuriated. Why couldn’t he do that to Anthony? Kate was his friend, not his sister. Not that it made a difference but to boys it clearly did. Kate didn’t know what category it fell into.
Simon just winked at her, “I better go before I do something I’ll regret but really won’t regret. I’ll see you around Kate,” Simon then literally ran away from Kate, and Kate was left standing there, gobsmacked.
“What just happened?” Poppy asked, walking up to Kate and following her gaze towards the back of Simon’s head, fading into the crowd.
Kate sighed, taking a long gulp of her vodka and cranberry. “I have absolutely no idea.”
The following day, Kate was feeling rather sorry for herself as she sat in the common room of their accommodation. She was incredibly hungover, exhausted and had sat through two lectures back to back that morning. She was meeting Anthony for lunch before she went to sleep for the rest of the day.
Anthony strode into the common room, a frown on his face as he sat down opposite her. "Were you with Simon Basset last night?”
“Wha?” Kate mumbled, her hangover pounding against her temple. “Hello to you too. Oh, yeah.” She would have rather forgotten about him, the guy who had rejected her in the middle of the club.
“And?” Anthony pressed, staring at Kate rather disgruntled.
Kate sat up, rather confused at his attitude. She was more than familiar with Anthony's moodiness, but this was slightly bizarre. He looked pissed. “And what?”
“Kate,” Anthony snapped, looking oddly serious as he pulled out his sandwich. “What do you think? Did you get with him?”
She didn’t care for his tone and she glared at him as she lifted her head. She ignored his question. “Did you say something to Simon Basset about me?”
Anthony gaped at her, his mouth hanging open with his half chewed lunch. “What?”
“Ew, shut your mouth you animal,” She scolded, making a face at him. “He mentioned you last night.”
Anthony put his sandwich down, looking at her seriously. “Did you get with him?”
Kate felt her cheeks heat up, forcing herself to look at him and scowl. “That’s none of your business!”
He was not pleased in the slightest. His tone was cold with a hint of irritation, lower than usual. “Kate.”
He leaned forward as he spoke, “Seriously, Kate.”
“Not that it has anything to do with you, but no, we didn’t!” She exclaimed, not understanding why he was acting quite hostile and why he was acting that question. They weren’t the type of friends to talk about who they got with, and Kate wasn’t really that type of person anyway. She was easily mortified. “He wouldn’t because of you. Something about some misogynistic bro-code.”
Anthony let out what looked like a sigh of relief, but she wasn’t sure. She knew that she would never truly understand men, and this was another example of why she shouldn’t ever bother trying.
“What did you say to him?” Kate asked, frowning at him, now happily munching away at his sandwich. She felt ridiculous asking, but she was confused and annoyed. “Did you tell him not get with me? You better not have Anthony Bridgerton. I will murder you.”’
“I didn’t tell him anything! Jesus, Kate. It’s Bro-Code. You don’t get with sisters, girlfriends, ex-girlfriends or girls who are best friends of your friends. There’s some lines you don’t cross,” He shrugged. “It would be like me getting with Edwina.”
“Okay, I’m eating my lunch and I'm extremely hangover,” She gagged, shuddering at the thought. “That is not the same. That code is ridiculous. Women aren't possessions you can ban your friends from getting with simply because they mean something to you.”
“It would be like you getting with Benedict!” The coloured veins in his neck were sticking out and she could see his frustration. “It’s wrong and immoral.”
“Again, eating my lunch. Benedict is a child so that’s another disgusting example I won't be entertaining. You're being absolutely ridiculous,” She shook her head, “I can still get with whoever I want. I don’t need your permission or some stupid code dictating that.”
“I never said you did,” He retorted, wiping his mouth with a napkin. “Besides, Basset is my friend and all, but he’s bad news. He flies through girls. He’s not relationship material.”
“That’s sort of the pot calling the kettle black, though, isn’t it? Siena is still with you.” She felt like she had gone too far, but she was too angry to care. Siena was a sensitive topic, an unspoken topic, but she did it anyway. “I know what I can handle.”
“Do you, though?” His tone wasn’t angry, it was cold. She had struck a nerve. He looked at her with a blank expression and Kate felt like he was looking right through her. “It’s not like you know what you’re talking about. You’re not exactly experienced, are you?”
Kate stared at him, speechless, as if her ability to speak had been slapped out of her. She felt the heat rush behind her eyes and the tears that were quickly following, but in that moment she’d rather die than cry in front of him.
She just grabbed her bag and walked off, ignoring his calls behind her.
They don’t speak for three days, which frankly, sucks. It's their first big fight in the two years they've known each other. They bickered constantly but they never actually fought. It was awful. They still had to see each other, at lectures and around the university, but she sits at the back and as far away from him as possible. He had tried to speak to her and pretend like nothing had happened the following day, but she had just walked past him.
He had really hurt her feelings. Her lack of experience was a sensitive topic, and he knew that, everyone knew that and he had still thrown it back in her face.
It’s a Wednesday night and she’s in her room, writing an essay about corporate law. She had said no to going to the pub with her friends, she wasn’t in the mood. She was trying to focus on her lectures but her mind kept revolving back to Anthony bloody Bridgerton.
“Kate, I know you’re in there. I can see the light,” Anthony’s voice was loud and clear through her door. “Please talk to me. I’m really sorry about what I said. I didn’t mean it. I was an asshole.”
She didn’t say anything, twirling her pen around with her fingers. Her breath had caught in her throat as she heard his voice, she hadn’t expected him to be there. She figured he had gone to the pub, or was out with Siena.
“I hate not talking to you. I miss you. Please? I brought you those cookies you like. And those fizzy bears,” His voice was pleading, and she knew he meant it. “I’m so sorry. Please.”
She opened the door after a few seconds, staring at him, and then at the goods in his hands. Her willpower had long expired and he sounded so sad, so desperate. He sounded like she felt. “White chocolate chip?”
“Of course,” He said, standing up straight and handing her the food. “I’m so sorry, Kate. Can I-?"
“Come in,” She murmured, walking in and collapsing on her bed. She pulled her legs up, making room for him on the bed. She opened the fizzy bears, offering them to him first.
He hesitated as he looked at her, biting his lip. “We’re okay?”
She nodded, “We’re okay. I am sorry about what I said too, you know. About the pot calling the kettle black comment. You were still a bigger asshole, but I’m sorry.”
“I deserved it. You’re not wrong and I wasn’t exactly nice, was I?” She snorted, and he laughed. “I really did mean it from a good place. I don’t want anyone to mess you around like that.”
“I know, but I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself,” She replied, licking the sugar off her lips. “You need to take that toxic masculinity down a notch, Bridgerton.”
“I know, I know what I said was wrong. It took me longer than I'd like to admit, but I understand that now,” He replied, his voice soft and she felt guilty for being mean to him. He didn’t look great, he looked tired and the skin under his eyes was darker than usual. “I am sorry. Please don’t ever ignore me again. I’d rather get my wisdom teeth out again than go through that.”
“Well, don’t be an asshole and we won’t have any problems, will we?” said Kate, smiling sweetly at him as she opened up the cookies, feeling the white chocolate melt in her mouth. It tasted glorious.
“Whatever or who you want to do, I will support it. I promise,” He looked slightly in pain as he spoke. “I really am sorry.”
“I know,” She nudged him with her foot. “We’re friends again, relax.”
He looked relieved but slightly uneasy. “Is this one of those friendship moments where we should hug?”
She snorted, rolling her eyes. Affection was not something that came natural to Anthony Bridgerton but it was adorable when he tried. “Hard pass.”
They spent the rest of the evening in her dorm, chatting about everything and anything. It had only been three days of not speaking, and she had missed him more than she should have. She had missed him a dangerous amount, and it seemed like he had missed her too.
Kate shook her head, pushing those thoughts to the back of her mind as she focused on Anthony’s story about some trouble his younger brother Colin had gotten into in Eton yesterday. Ever since his father died, Colin had been acting more and more reckless. Anthony didn’t know what to do with him and his mother just coddled Colin.
Their second year is a blur of exams, parties, clubbing, more exams, assignments as winter turns to spring and spring to summer. It’s over before it feels like it has started, and Kate can’t believe it.
Anthony’s on and off relationship ends as well, when Sienna decides to study abroad in Paris for her second year and leaves at the start of the summer. Kate doesn’t let herself think about why she feels lighter, but she still brings him McDonalds and beer when he texts them they broke up. His room is pretty much packed up, unlike Kate, Anthony is very organized. Their second year was officially over and they were leaving tomorrow. Kate hadn’t even packed, but she knew he’d help in the morning.
He doesn’t talk about his feelings, obviously, because he’s Anthony. They watch New Girl instead, on his laptop, eating crisps and drinking coke, until he shocks her and talks.
“She said I was lost,” He murmured, playing with his pocket watch. It was something he always did. “That I didn’t know what I wanted and she couldn’t keep waiting for me to figure it out. I wasn’t fair to her.”
“Oh,” said Kate, gulping slightly. Kate was just above Anthony on how to deal with feelings and general emotion, and that bar was set pretty low anyway. “I think, sometimes, some of us just take longer to figure out what we want. She must know she wants and she’s not wrong for going after it, even if it means leaving other people behind.”
“That doesn’t mean she’s right about you though,” She continued, trying to phrase her words delicately. “You’ve been through a lot, Anthony. It’s okay if you need more time to figure things out. We’re still young. No one meets the person they’re meant to be with when they’re 20 years old.”
“My parents met when they were 18,” He retorted, raising a pointed eyebrow. Anthony’s parents had been madly in love since they were teenagers and they had had Anthony quite young.
“Okay, well, they’re the exception then, not the rule,” She nudged him with her elbow lightly. “I know we’re not the feeling sort, but everything is going to be okay. It hurts because she mattered, and that’s a good thing. It’s better than not feeling anything at all. And eventually it will hurt less and less, and I’ll be here until it doesn’t.”
“Thanks, Kate,” murmured Anthony, looking uncomfortable but he still nudged her back which is probably the most affectionate exchange they’ve ever had between them. “Thank god you’re you. I couldn’t handle a friend who asks me how I’m feeling all the time.”
Kate snorted, rolling her eyes. The word rang in her head, a friend, but that’s what she was. That’s what he was to her. Her best friend, really. Then why did it sting when he said it? “I mean this is the nicest way possible, you need to see a therapist.”
He smacked her with a pillow, and she kicked him in the ribs, and that was the last they spoke of Siena and anything remotely to do with feelings.
Kate ignored the mixture of guilt and relief in her chest to see the back of Siena. She didn't question why it was there.
Kate had been away for most of the summer after their second year of university, traveling abroad with Edwina and Mary. It had been a trip Mary had saved up for for years and it was finally happening. They went interrailing around Europe, from Prague to Paris, staying in hostels and traveling by train.
It was the longest Kate and Anthony had ever been apart since they had met, and it was strange. They spoke on facetime most days, well, Kate spoke and Anthony listened as she spoke about her travels around Europe with her mum and sister. She sent him the picture of her holding the eiffel tower, a picture of her at the colosseum and sunset at a beach in Mykonos.
Not that Kate would ever admit it to another living soul, as much as Edwina had teased her relentlessly about it, she had missed him a lot. She had come to the realization that Anthony was her best friend. Her first, true best friend. He was someone she had always wanted to have in a friend, one that was depicted in movies and television shows-she had had good friends before university, but no one was like Anthony. She didn’t have to be anyone but herself around him.
She was thrilled when he had asked her to spend the last month of the summer with Anthony at his house in Kent. She loved Mary and Edwina but Somerset was boring and she needed to get away.
Kate felt strange.
She had this uncomfortable, nauseous feeling in the pit of her stomach for most of the train ride on her way to Kent. Their flight had arrived in England yesterday morning and once they had driven home, Kate was gone the next morning. She had barely slept last night but she wasn’t sure if it was out of excitement or anxiety at the thought of seeing Anthony again.
She had changed her outfit three times before setting on a violet sundress with a daisy print.
It was just Anthony, Kate.
That was the problem.
It was Anthony.
The train finally pulled in at her station, snapping Kate out of her complicated thoughts and she dragged her suitcase off the baggage railing, glancing around. It was an old station, all she could see in the distance was fields and trees. It was just before noon and all the station had was a man behind the information desk and a small corner shop.
She walked out to the front of the station, half wheeling and half dragging her semi-functioning suitcase behind her as she glanced around the car park. Kate pulled out her phone, pressing the call button on Anthony’s contact.
Kate turned around to see Anthony Bridgerton grinning at her, a pair of black sunglasses covering his eyes. He looked so relaxed, in a simple white t-shirt and blue shorts, suitable for a warm English August in Kent.
It made her feel warm inside.
“Hey there, stranger,” Kate said, her cheeks beginning to ache as her grin matched his own.
She didn’t know who moved first, but when Anthony’s tanned arms wrapped around her, essentially lifting her off the ground and her arms wrapped around his neck, there was one thing Kate knew for certain.
It was the best hug of her entire life.
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Stay With Me || jjk
➥Pairing: best friend!jungkook/reader, husband!jungkook/reader
➥Summary: Being married to Jungkook was everything you’d wished for and more. There wasn’t a problem the two of you couldn’t tackle together, and building this life with the person you loved most was all you could ask for. But when a ghost from your past returns and threatens to pull you two apart in whatever way they can, will things still be the same?
➥Genre: established relationship, heavy angst (I’m so sorry), smut, fluff, hurt/comfort
➥Words: ~14.2k (more of a one shot than a drabble I know, oops)
Before you continue there are darker themes explored in this drabble; please read at your own risk. Appropriate warnings are listed below.
➥Content Warnings: POV switches, feelings of anxiety from being in danger, jungkook is protective (and for good reason), we see a pissed off hoseok, (tw: harassment, violence, implied/attempted kidnapping, reader gets injured), yoongi & jimin to the rescue (bless them), jungkook is pissed off (again for good reason), jungkook cries, reader also cries, jungkook has feelings of insecurity and not being good enough, they have ✨very emotional sex✨ up against a wall, cursing (fuck is said a lot), slight hair pulling, fingering (very brief), jungkook has a big dick, unprotected sex (safe sex is great sex), dirty talk, rough sex, cumming inside, aftercare, jungkook is actually the sweetest, reader and jk are so in love with each other it hurts, also jk saying ‘only for you’ is a thing i started and can’t stop now oops except there’s a twist this time around
A/N: hello! This is part of my Only for You (OFY) Drabble series, but it can be read as a stand-alone! However, I would highly recommend reading OFY beforehand so as to better understand the relationships between these characters since there’s a lot of history behind everything that will make more sense. (I also mentioned this in the post for OFY but for those who haven’t read it, the Kun in the story isn’t referring to any other irl person specifically, it was just a name I chose to make the initial story easier to write.)
The POV switches between the reader and a few of the characters, but this will always be indicated by the name in the switch being bolded (i.e. you or Jungkook will be in bold, etc.).
I always do this but thank you to @dntaewithluv for keeping me sane during the writing process and giving me feedback as well as the motivation to continue when I feel discouraged, I love you so much 💜
I’ve written a few other drabbles and will list them below, along with a general timeline:
Use My Best Colors For Your Portrait - ~6 months after OFY
When I Dream Of You - ~1 year after OFY
This fic takes place a few months after the dream drabble. I welcome feedback, so if you ever want to talk to me about my writing, please do! I hope that if you read this, you enjoy it~
taglist: @inlovewiththemoonn @diorkookie @swee3tcreature @sugaslittlekookies @moonchild1 @bangtanhome
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Visiting Jungkook at the bar during his shifts had become one of your favorite pastimes over the last few years. And not just because you got to see him, but also because it gave you a chance to get closer to some of his - and now your - friends as well.
Take tonight for example: you stopped by on your way home from work, and everything happened like it usually did. Jungkook’s smile was typically the first thing to greet you when you walked through the door before he and Jimin got into a playful bickering match about bar duties.
You parked yourself in your usual stool at the bar and watched the scene before you unfold - Jimin tossing one of the bar towels to Jungkook, who caught it with ease, all the while mumbling ‘less distraction and more action, Kook.’ Jungkook slung the towel over his shoulder before making a big show out of walking over to you.
“Hey pretty lady, what can I get for you tonight?” Jungkook’s voice was dripping with charm and it made you giggle. He leaned across the bar, resting his forearms on the wood. Even when he was just standing here in a plain black t-shirt with his dark hair curling in front of his eyes you still thought he was the most ethereal person you’d ever seen.
You hummed. “Hmm, I think I’ll have just a water, thanks.” Jungkook was already moving to fix your beverage before you even finished. “Do you always greet people like this,” you teased him as he sat the glass down in front of you.
He was wiping his hands on the towel still perched on his shoulder. “Nah, I only save it for the special ones. I am a married man, after all.”
You giggled again and he reached further across the bar to give you a quick kiss before being interrupted by Jimin again.
“You two are adorable, I love that, but I really could use some help over here, Kook!”
Jungkook playfully rolled his eyes before he excused himself to tend to his actual job. You just sat and observed while you drank, looking at him with loving eyes. He was really in his element here and it showed. All his customers were always happy patrons because he treated them all well.
Yeah, everything was playing out as it normally did on nights like these.
What you weren’t expecting, however, was for that to change.
On your way to find Yoongi so you could stop by and chat with him before heading home, you passed by a booth where a few rowdy men were seated. You tried to slip past them and pay them no mind-
-until one of them caught you by the wrist.
You froze. You wondered if maybe this was someone you knew and had possibly offended by not saying hello, but one look at the table let you know you’d never seen these 3 men before in your life.
“Hey, where you off to in a rush, baby?” The pet name made your skin crawl and you wanted nothing more than to just slink away and pretend like this never happened. But it was happening, the man’s tight grip on your wrist a reminder of that.
One of the other booth members spoke up. “Yeah, why not have a seat with us and talk for a bit? You look like you’re in need of some company.”
You shook your head and tried to muster a small smile so you could turn them down easy. You’d read and heard way too often about moments like these that could turn out badly if you acted a certain way.
“No thank you, I was just on my way out,” you hoped that would be the end of it, but the man holding your wrist wasn’t having it. He jerked you down to where you were seated right beside him in the empty space of the booth, making you whimper in pain when you hit the seat hard. His other friends laughed boisterously at your distress.
You situated yourself and looked up to see if you could spot someone, anyone around that you knew. You were unfortunately at the back corner of the bar, since Yoongi’s office was around here.
You tried to get up and make a break for it, but the man pulled you down again. “C’mon sweetheart, we don’t wanna hurt you. We just wanna talk, that’s all.”
Before you could respond, another voice cut through.
“Hands off,” the voice was low and stern, making all heads at the booth turn. When you looked up you saw Hoseok standing above you, arms crossed and looking pissed.
“Hoseok,” you breathed out, grateful that he was working the floor tonight and had stopped by before the situation escalated.
Hoseok didn’t say another word as his eyes drifted down to you quickly before glaring at the man still holding on to you.
“Lighten up, man, we’re just trying to have some fun-”
“I saw the whole thing and she’s clearly not wanting to engage in your idea of ‘fun’ so again: hands off.” Hoseok’s fingers flexed around his forearm, and apparently that was all the warning they needed.
The man let go of you and shoved you away from him, almost making you fall to the ground if Hoseok hadn’t steadied you. He wrapped an arm around you before calling out.
“Joon, Jin, need a hand here!”
Within seconds, the bodyguards of the establishment - also friends of yours - were at the table, looking as intimidating as ever. The 3 men still seated were starting to look a lot less pleased about the ordeal.
“I think these 3 have had it for the night,” Hoseok stated, starting to walk the both of you away so your friends could work their magic. You looked back at them one last time, just barely catching their interaction, which consisted of Seokjin promptly putting one of the men in his place when he tried to throw a punch.
When Hoseok had you seated in an empty booth at the other end of the bar, he knelt down beside you.
“Hey. You ok?” His voice had lost all its frightening timbre, now laced with nothing but concern. You didn’t realize you were still a little shaky until you noticed yourself trembling. You nodded, the best answer you could give right now.
Hoseok patted your knee before he stood up. “Stay here, I’m going to go get Kook-”
You reached out lightning fast to grab onto his sleeve before you pleaded “Don’t.”
Hoseok’s brows furrowed in confusion. “What, why not?”
“I don’t- I don’t want him to worry.” You were telling the truth; Jungkook had been on edge lately, and things were finally starting to get somewhat back to normal. If you didn’t have to add to that worry, you didn’t want to.
Hoseok’s frown deepened. “Y/N-”
“There you are!”
That voice that always managed to make your heart flutter only made you panic more in this instance. Jungkook was walking over to your booth quickly with a huge smile on his face, waving to the two of you. Hoseok moved out of the way so Jungkook could see you more, and you tried your best to smile back.
“Hey, I’ve been looking all over for you,” Jungkook addressed you as he pushed his hair out of his face. “I thought you went to go talk to Yoongi, but he said he hadn’t seen you yet.”
“Yeah, I was just on my way, but I ran into Hoseok-”
“Y/N,” Hoseok warned. Jungkook’s smile turned into one of confusion.
“What’s going on,” Jungkook was quick to ask before you could respond. It was then that he fully noticed how you were seated, somewhat curled into yourself.
“You need to tell him,” Hoseok’s eyes were burning into yours, and Jungkook felt a small pit of unease settle in his stomach. He knelt down beside you, similar to how Hoseok had done moments prior.
“Angel, hey, talk to me. What’s this about?” Jungkook took one of your hands in his and shook it slightly before placing a kiss on the back of it.
“It’s nothing, really-”
“Some guy put his hands on her.” Hoseok clearly was over you beating around the bush.
“What,” Jungkook’s tone was slipping into one you didn’t recognize and for good reason: he sounded furious. His hand tightened around yours.
Hoseok nodded, Jungkook’s attention on him now. “Yeah, I’m glad I noticed. Saw some dude grab her wrist and pull her down into the booth with them.”
Jungkook was up on his feet, hand disappearing from yours.
“What the fuck, where did they go,” he started to walk off but Hoseok held him back.
“Joon and Jin already took care of it, don’t worry. But I still just thought you should know.” Hoseok patted Jungkook on the shoulder and you watched as his body, still visibly tense, relaxed somewhat.
“I gotta get back to work, you can take a little time though, yeah?” Hoseok started walking off after giving you one last look, almost as if he was saying sorry but you knew he did the right thing.
Jungkook took a deep breath before finally looking back at you, his face softening instantly. He slid into the seat across from you, placing his palms on the table as he looked down.
“Are you ok, at least,” his voice was low, but you could still hear it just over the faint tunes of the jukebox.
“Define fine,” he scoffed. It was clear the two of you wouldn’t get anywhere like this, so you did the only thing you could think to do: you reached out and took both his hands in yours.
Jungkook looked up then through the curtain of tresses still falling into his eyes. He sighed.
“Sorry, baby, I know I shouldn’t be acting like this. It’s just- with everything we’ve been through with him I can’t help but worry about stuff like this.”
You understood completely because you were in the same boat.
Both of you had recently been experiencing less than pleasant encounters with your ex-fiancé, Kun, who for some reason decided he had a vendetta against the two of you. A vendetta that only got worse when you both made it clear you wanted nothing to do with him ever again.
The past week had been pretty quiet, but neither of you could shake the awful feeling that Kun wasn’t gone for good. And tonight’s fiasco did nothing to help that.
“Well it’s over now and I’m ok and I didn’t get hurt so let’s try not to focus on it, yeah?” You squeezed his hands for emphasis and he sighed. The last thing you wanted was for Jungkook to be worried the rest of his shift, and he still had a few hours left.
“Yeah, I’ll try. I’m just so glad Hoseok was around...are you still wanting to talk to Yoongi?”
You nodded, happy to see Jungkook had relaxed some more from when he first sat across from you.
“I’ll take you to his office, then.” Jungkook got up, pulling you with him since his hands were still in yours. When you both were standing, he wrapped his arms around your waist to pull you into a hug.
He looked down at you before placing a soft kiss on your forehead. “Also I hate to ask but do you mind staying until I get done with my shift? I’m not too keen on the idea of you going home alone now with everything-“
You giggled and caressed his cheek. “Of course, Koo. I’ll come sit at the bar when I get done talking to Yoongi.”
Jungkook brushed his nose against yours. “Thank you.”
“Anything for you,” you responded before you reached up to place a gentle kiss on his lips. His hold around you tightened, and he deepened the kiss for only a moment before pulling back.
“Fuck, I forgot I’m at work, I need to be careful when you’re around.” He carded a hand through his hair before shaking his head to let it fall back into place.
You laughed at his flustered nature, feeling a bit flustered yourself at the fact that even now you still had such an effect on each other. “Well we are back here in a dark corner where not many people are around,” you teased.
Jungkook smirked before tickling your sides, making you laugh louder as you squirmed to get away.
“Don’t tempt me. I’d rather not get fired for public indecency if I can help it.”
“Fine, fine, I guess just take me to see Yoongi then,” you pretended to pout and were rewarded with a chuckle. He led you to the back now where Yoongi’s office was at, his hand wrapped around yours while he scanned the bar the whole way there.
When the two of you reached the familiar door, Jungkook gave your hand one last squeeze and kissed your cheek.
“I’ve gotta get back to the bar, just come chill up there when you’re done, yeah?” His eyebrows were slightly furrowed like he was still worried, but your gentle smile helped smooth them out.
“Of course. I’ll see you soon.”
You knocked on the door and after hearing Yoongi’s muffled greeting you opened it to walk through, not sparing another glance at Jungkook.
“Y/N! I was wondering when you might be stopping by.” Yoongi smiled brightly at you, always making you feel welcome no matter the circumstance. You took a seat in your usual spot across from his desk where he was currently reclining in his chair.
“Hey, Yoon. How are things?” It’d been a little while since the two of you had properly caught up since things had been so chaotic lately.
Yoongi shrugged. “Can’t complain. Business is good and we’ve been pulling in more regulars. I’d like to say it’s thanks to Jungkook but don’t tell him I told you that. Kid has a big enough head as it is.”
You couldn’t help the proud grin that stretched across your face. Jungkook had been working hard to help turn the bar into a more welcoming environment and increased his work hours to also assist with some building upgrades Yoongi had been wanting to install for years. Their business had increased exponentially as a result, so you knew Yoongi meant it when he said he had Jungkook to thank.
“I’ll be sure to keep it our little secret,” you brought your hand up to mimic a ‘shh’ expression and Yoongi chuckled.
“Perfect.” He leaned forward then, an elbow resting on his desk and his head supported by his palm. “So tell me: how’s married life?”
“It’s everything I could ever want and more. I can’t say much has changed except the whole ‘legally being bound together’ thing, since we still act the same. It’s just…nice. Really, really nice.” Your gaze drifted down to your wedding ring, and as it was with every other time you saw it, you could feel something akin to butterflies fluttering inside your stomach.
Yoongi gave you his trademark lopsided grin. “Glad to hear it. You know, I was always rooting for you two from the start.”
You feigned annoyance, playfully rolling your eyes. “I know, I know, you only tell me every chance you get.” Yoongi never took a liking to your ex-fiancé and had always favored Jungkook, this much you knew. Even before Kun turned into the person he was now, Yoongi never cared for him. And he made sure it was known.
“Have you thought about when you’re going to pop the question?” You decided to switch gears and put him on the spot, giggling at the way he seemed flustered.
“Well I uh, I’ve thought about it I just- it’s hard to figure out the right time, you know? And is she even ready for that, I can’t tell-”
“Min Yoongi, you stop that right now. She is so in love with you that I bet she’s ready for you to ask any day now, just so she can say yes like she’s been wanting to for so long now.” You had spent enough time around Yoongi and his long-term partner to know that the two were head-over-heels for each other, nearly rivaling you and Jungkook in how easy it was to tell.
Yoongi grinned. “You think so, huh?”
“No doubt in my mind. In fact-” you were cut off by the feeling of your phone vibrating in your pocket. You hastily took it out, not sure who could be calling at this hour.
It dawned on you then that you had been expecting a new client to call, and the number on your screen was one you didn’t recognize so you figured it could be them. Your boss had heavily expressed the importance of this client and their business venture they were offering, so without giving it another thought you hopped out of your chair.
“Sorry Yoon, I need to take this real quick. Do you mind if I step out the back door? It shouldn’t take too long.” You were already heading to leave his office, trying to catch the call before it stopped ringing, barely missing his soft “Go ahead.”
You bolted through the back door of the establishment, out into the dimly lit parking lot. As soon as you heard the door shut, you swiftly answered the call.
“Hello, this is Y/N speaking, may I ask who’s calling?” You gave your usual greeting for work related or other conversations when you didn’t recognize the number. The silence that you were met with on the other end made a chill run down your spine.
You froze altogether when the other voice spoke.
“Hasn’t anyone ever told you not to answer calls from numbers you don’t know?”
You felt your lower lip tremble. “K-Kun?”
A dark chuckle from the other end of the line. “Missed me, sweetheart?”
‘Just hang up,’ your brain was screaming at you, but you were holding your phone in an iron-tight grip, knuckles taut.
“Leave me alone and never contact me again,” you were finally able to respond, moving your arm to bring your phone down to hang up.
Your phone hit the ground before you got the chance.
Someone had come up behind you and pulled both arms behind your back, a hand coming around to muffle the scream you let out.
“Shhh,” someone whispered beside your ear. “You don’t want to make this harder for yourself, hm?”
That voice, why did you recognize that voice?
The person started dragging you off into one of the darker corners of the parking lot, ignoring your futile attempts to kick and writhe out of their grasp. You continued screaming into their palm but to no avail.
When you reached where they wanted you to be, they let you go and pushed you down onto the ground, causing your back to hit the wall and briefly knock the breath out of you. Before you could pick yourself back up, 2 other shadowy figures blocked your path. There was just enough light for you to finally make out the faces of the 3 people standing over you.
They were the same ones from earlier in the bar, the ones who had harassed you and yanked you down into their booth.
“What do you want,” you sobbed out into the night air. You were too terrified to try screaming again, afraid of what they might do. Especially now that you were across the lot, away from your phone and any chance of contacting someone else. Not to mention the fact that it was loud inside the bar, so screaming wouldn’t do you many favors anyway.
And if someone walked by, nothing would look out of the ordinary since it was just dark enough where you were to obscure the vision of anyone looking from the outside.
Before any of them could answer you, there was another sound you heard faintly in the distance: footsteps.
“Hel-,” you started to cry out, but as if they knew what you were planning, one of the men dropped down and covered your mouth again, now letting you see who was approaching behind them. Your eyes widened in terror as you took in the newcomer’s sinister grin.
You watched as Kun nodded to the other 2 men and they moved aside, while the third one still keeping your mouth covered moved slightly out of the way. Kun knelt down and moved his hand, replacing it with his own before you could scream again.
“Well well, fancy seeing you here.” Kun reached out and caressed your check with the back of his other hand, making you let out a strangled whimper as you tried to move back and away from him. He shook his head at your action and grabbed onto one of your arms now instead, pulling you and himself up in a swift motion.
His grip around your arm was painful, making you wince. Kun either didn’t notice or didn’t care. One look into his eyes was enough to see that the man you’d spent many years of your life with was completely gone with no trace left whatsoever. You didn’t know this person standing in front of you now.
And you didn’t ever want to.
“Now, I’m gonna move my hand, and you’re not gonna scream. Got it? Because if you do,” he moved forward to where his face was inches away from yours now. “I promise this will be so much worse for you. And you know I always keep my promises, don’t you?”
Kun was laughing before you could react at all, knowing good and well he’d broken several promises during your time together. He must have taken your silence as compliance because you could feel his hand relaxing around your face.
“Good girl,” the words made you shudder repulsively, wanting nothing more than for this to be just a terrible figment of your imagination and for you to be back inside at the bar waiting on Jungkook.
Jungkook. The thought of him caused a lump to form in your throat. You had no idea what Kun had planned for you, and that caused your heart to constrict as the vision of Jungkook smiling lovingly at you flashed through your mind.
You squeezed your eyes shut and felt a tear roll down your cheek. You opened them again once you felt Kun’s hand disappear.
“Ah, so you can take direction well. I guess Jungkook’s trained you somewhat since you’re his bitch now-”
“What do you want,” you asked through gritted teeth. The last thing you wanted to hear come from this man’s mouth was the name of your beloved. You didn’t want him brought up at all, the less this was focused on Jungkook the better.
But, since it was Kun, that obviously didn’t happen.
Kun laughed again, a loud, ugly sound. “What do I want? The same thing I’ve always wanted. Isn’t it obvious?”
The 3 men were crowded around both of you now, and it dawned on you then that they were blocking any means of escape for you. That didn’t bode well for you and you knew it, but you held your ground. You didn’t want to give Kun any more of the upper hand than he already had.
Kun finally dropped his other hand from your arm in favor of now caging you in against the wall. You were trapped even more now, but you just stared back at him, trying your best to look unfazed. Kun dipped his head down and you held your breath.
“What I want,” you could feel him barely hovering over your lips and the feeling made your skin crawl, “is for Jungkook to pay.”
“Pay for what,” you couldn’t help your annoyed tone. Kun’s obsession with Jungkook and ‘coming out on top’ – whatever that even meant, you weren’t entirely sure – had gotten old and you were beyond sick of it. “He owes you nothing, we owe you nothing.”
Kun hummed and shook his head, his nose almost brushing against yours, but you turned your head and let it graze against your cheek.
”I don’t think you get to decide that, not in the position you’re in, anyway. You see, I’m tired of seeing Jungkook get literally everything handed to him without trying-”
“Jungkook has worked hard for everything he has, something you wouldn’t know about,” you spat back. Kun was right, you were certainly in no position to be talking back right now, but you wouldn’t stand idly by while he slandered Jungkook just because he felt like it. “You’ve always been jealous of him-”
“Shut up, shut up!” Kun snarled, all but yelling in your face before he grabbed you by the jaw. You grimaced from the pain of it, a sound something like a scream starting but dying in your throat.
“You fucking infuriate me sometimes, you know that? I can’t believe I wasted so many years with you.” His grip around your jaw tightened as he finished talking, making it almost too hard for you to respond.
“Likewise,” you managed to get out, not being able to help the sob you let out when he squeezed more.
“Doesn’t matter.” Kun’s face stretched into that evil, Cheshire-like grin and for the first time that night you felt genuinely horrified about what his true intentions might be. “I’m not concerned with you or how you feel.”
Kun finally let go of your jaw and you let out the breath you didn’t realize you had been holding in. He grabbed one of your wrists and tugged you closer, knocking you off balance and unfortunately causing you to brace yourself against his chest.
He hugged you to him and whispered in your ear: “What I do care about is seeing Jungkook’s reaction when his precious wife is suddenly nowhere to be found.”
That kicked you into fight or flight mode, eyes widening and mouth opening to scream as you flailed your hands around. Your flailing did little to help you because Kun was already dragging you alongside him away from the wall, still holding you close.
“Let me go, you psycho!” you screamed, only causing him to turn you around and put a hand over your mouth again while his other arm held you firm against his torso.
“One of you bring the car around,” Kun ordered, and you saw one of the men dashing away. As you were pulled further away from the bar, your vision was clouded with a film of tears and your muffled sobs were hidden behind Kun’s hand. You were no match for his strength, and he proved it because he was literally dragging you across the concrete despite you being so uncooperative. Gentle raindrops had just started falling from the sky, further impairing your vision.
It was then that you heard a pained grunt followed by a thud coming from a little further away, in the direction the other man had ran off to. You tried to focus your eyes to see what was happening when the next sound that graced your ears was fast footsteps as they pounded against the pavement.
“Get your fucking hands off of her!”
A familiar voice made you cry out with joy and fight harder against Kun.
“Yoongi,” you cried out, still muffled but enough to draw his attention to your face now. He was running toward Kun fast, and when he saw the position you were in, he sped up, determined to free you by any means necessary.
You briefly worried about the other men behind him, until you saw that another was already knocked down and someone else – you thought it might be Jimin – was currently fighting with the third man. While your attention was on them, you didn’t register Kun tossing you aside until it was too late.
You slipped on the now wet pavement and fell down, barely able to brace yourself for the impact in time. Your earlier vision of Jungkook smiling was the last thing to flash through your mind before your head hit the ground.
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Yoongi glanced at his watch for the second time. It’d been about 10 minutes since you stepped outside to take your phone call, and he figured it had to have been important if you were still outside.
As he was wondering whether or not to call you himself to see if everything was alright, Jimin stuck his head inside the office, peeking around the door. “Hey boss, is Y/N around?”
Yoongi sat up straight. “Yeah, she stepped outside to take a call but it’s been a few minutes. Why?”
Jimin’s face blanched. “She went alone?”
“Yeah... Jimin’s what’s going on?”
Jimin took a deep breath. “It’s probably nothing, but earlier there were some guys that straight up harassed her. They were thrown out but-“
Yoongi held a hand up. “Wait. Pause. Someone harassed her? Why is this the first I’m hearing about it?”
Jimin had stepped fully into the room now, rubbing at the back of his neck as he looked at the ground. “Well it wasn’t that long ago, so maybe nobody had the chance yet.”
Yoongi’s brows furrowed. “Does Jungkook know?”
Jimin nodded. “Yeah, he’s the one who asked me to come check on her without being too obvious about it. I think the whole thing has him spooked.”
Yoongi didn’t like the feeling that was slowly creeping up on him. He dialed your number and put the receiver to his ear, hoping to hear a busy signal on the other end.
When he was met with a series of rings, his heart started beating faster. He was up and out of his chair fully by the time he heard your voicemail greeting.
“Fuck,” he mumbled out loud to no one in particular. He was jogging over to the back door, a confused Jimin following close behind.
“Not now, Jimin.” He picked up his pace, feeling his chest tighten as he approached the door. He was hoping that when he opened it you would be on the other side, because maybe you just lost track of time and your phone was on silent.
Wishful thinking helps in times of peril, right?
Yoongi pushed the door open quickly, letting it bang against the side of the bar. You were nowhere in sight, his eyes frantically searching through the lot for a trace of you.
What he was met with, though, was instead the sight of 3 - maybe 4? - dark figures across the lot, huddled in a suspicious way. His heart dropped to his stomach.
He started running, not knowing what would meet him when he did, but not caring either. As he approached, one of the figures tried to block him. He took them down easily with a single punch, making them groan in pain as their body connected with the ground. Yoongi never stopped running for even a moment.
His heart wrenched when his vision finally adjusted enough to the darkness outside and he could see you and exactly who was holding you.
“Get your fucking hands off of her!” He shouted as he continued running, getting ready to barrel into Kun at any moment.
Hearing your faint cry of his name only made him go faster when his eyes landed on your horrified face.
It was raining now but Yoongi wouldn’t let that stop him from saving you. What he didn’t anticipate was for Kun to throw you in the opposite direction, making him conflicted about who to go after now. He settled for pursuing Kun still, finally reaching him and grabbing him by the shirt.
“What the actual fuck is your problem,” Yoongi yelled in Kun’s face. Kun brought his hands up to try and tear Yoongi’s away, but they wouldn’t budge.
Kun stopped trying to fight back and smiled at Yoongi, making a fresh wave of disgust cascade over him. When Kun spoke, his voice had a calm edge to it. “I’ll just keep coming back, no matter how many times you and those idiots in there,” he jerked his head in the direction of the bar, “try to keep me away.”
Yoongi quickly spun Kun around and forced him to the ground, keeping his hands behind his back and not giving him a way to escape. “Jimin, call the cops,” he called over his shoulder before leaning closer to Kun’s face. “We may not be able to keep you away, but they certainly can with all the dirt we have on you.”
Kun chuckled slightly before grimacing when Yoongi twisted his arm further. “You know,” he huffed out, “Y/N was pretty off balance when I threw her earlier.”
Yoongi stilled. He realized that Kun was trying to distract him by making him worry about you, and unfortunately for Yoongi it was working. Especially when his eyes fell on your unmoving figure several feet away, lying on your side.
“Shit,” he jumped up and ran over to you, completely abandoning Kun, beyond caring at that point. He knelt down and turned you over. He swallowed when he saw the way your arm landed limply on the ground beside him. He embraced your upper body within his arms, shaking you a little.
“Y/N, hey, wake up,” he begged. He could feel that you were still breathing, but it was very evident your fall had knocked you out. And Yoongi knew there was no telling what happened before he even got to you, so he had no clue how injured you might actually be.
He heard footsteps approaching from behind him, splashing against the puddles that were starting to form in the parking lot. He didn’t have to look up to know it was Jimin, since the other man was calling out his name before he got there.
“Yoongi, I called them, they said – wait where did he go?” Jimin was standing over Yoongi now, looking from one area of the parking lot to the other, but Kun was nowhere in sight. “Did you let him leave?”
Yoongi’s silence prompted Jimin to finally look down and his mouth dropped open as he himself dropped to kneel next to Yoongi.
“Holy shit, what happened,” Jimin reached out to gingerly touch your arm, frown deepening when he got no response from you.
“She probably hit her head when that bastard threw her earlier. She’s just knocked out, I think,” Yoongi’s voice was lined with unbridled anger. “Go see if you can find Jin since he’s the closest thing we have to a medic right now. And get Kook.”
Jimin nodded and without another word took off toward the bar. Yoongi couldn’t fathom how Jungkook would react but he knew it wouldn’t be good. As he waited, he held you closer, trying to shield you from the rain.
⊱──────── ✬ ✬ ✬ ────────⊰
Jungkook’s fingers were drumming against the bar absentmindedly as he listened to one of his regular patrons drone on about their week as they usually did on nights like tonight. He was genuinely trying to focus on what they were saying, truly he was, but his mind had been so muddled ever since the incident earlier that he found it hard to think about anything else.
Which is exactly why he had asked Jimin to casually check in on you and Yoongi.
It’d been a few minutes and Jimin still wasn’t back; Jungkook hoped that they were all 3 chatting and Jimin was just taking his time. He did want him to be inconspicuous about it, after all.
His patron finally excused themselves to go to the restroom, and Jungkook offered them a soft smile. For a second, he allowed himself to take a deep breath and try to push any lingering negative thoughts out of his mind so he could make it through the rest of his shift.
Jungkook should’ve known better than to hope for a moment’s peace.
He heard Jimin before he saw him, colliding with the other end of the bar. Jungkook cautiously started walking over to him, trying to ignore the heavy feeling that settled over his body like a suffocating blanket.
“Kook,” Jimin panted, “we need you. Now.”
The expression on Jimin’s face and the urgency of his voice made Jungkook’s blood run cold. He wasted no time in leaving the bar as he followed Jimin, nearly running him over when Jimin stopped once they were outside. As his sight adjusted to the drizzling rain, he saw something that made him run as fast as he could before eventually falling to his knees, panic seizing his heart.
“No. No no no no no,” Jungkook was chanting over and over as he stared at you, huddled against Yoongi as he held you close. Your eyes were closed and you weren’t moving.
Jungkook’s hands were shaking, and he could feel his lips quivering. Yoongi stared at Jungkook somberly before gentle passing you over to him.
He immediately drew you to him, burying your face in his chest while he cradled the back of your head with his palm.
The rain started pouring down harder now and he knew it was pelting against his back, cold and wet enough to chill him to the bone. But Jungkook felt nothing. There was nothing but numbness as he continued to rock you gently in his arms and placed a kiss on the top of your head.
“Hey angel, I’m here,” his voice was unsteady. “It’s me, baby, I’ve got you. You’re gonna be ok,” his arm that was wrapped around your back tightened its hold on you and he placed his head in the crook of your neck. You still didn’t rouse, no matter what he tried, and his shoulders started to shake.
“Kook-” Yoongi had to talk loud to be heard over the sudden downpour. “We need to get her inside.” He tried reaching out to touch Jungkook’s arm but Jungkook flinched away, embracing you even tighter now as if he was trying to protect you from anything and everything.
He just wanted to protect you. And the fact that he had failed was currently eating him alive with regret.
Yoongi sighed but tried again. “Jungkook,” he said it softer this time but still loud enough, “let’s take her inside. You don’t want her to get sick.”
At the mention of your well-being potentially suffering further damage, Jungkook started to somewhat come back to his senses. He held you tight and stood up with a little help from Yoongi, making sure to keep you as close to his chest as possible so you wouldn’t get soaked and because right now, he needed you near.
When the 3 of you were inside, Yoongi ushered you all into his office since there was a small couch in there were you could lie down. Jungkook placed you as gently as possible on the couch, feeling his heart break piece by piece every second you remained unmoving. The only thing that could offer him solace was the faint rise and fall of your chest as you breathed.
He dropped to sit on the floor beside the couch, holding one of your hands in his while he used his other one to brush some of your wet hair out of your face. He leaned his forehead against the arm of the couch and inhaled shakily.
Yoongi was leaning against his desk with his arms crossed, looking at the two of you. Jungkook appreciated Yoongi for giving him time to try and calm down before talking again.
“What happened,” Jungkook managed to croak after a minute or so had passed.
Yoongi took a deep breath. “Kun was here.”
Jungkook whipped his head around fast, his hair splaying water droplets on the couch. His eyes were glazed over with unshed tears, and Yoongi had never seen him look so angry.
He’d never seen Jungkook look so hurt.
“Kun did this to her,” Jungkook asked, tone low and dark, but it came out more as a statement because he already knew. He could tell by the angered inflection in Yoongi’s voice when he mentioned Kun.
Yoongi nodded. “Unfortunately. When I first made it outside, he was holding onto her, dragging her away-”
“Dragging her where,” his hand that was holding yours involuntarily squeezed harder.
Yoongi shrugged, shaking his head. “I don’t know, it looked like he was trying to take her to a car…”
Jungkook didn’t miss the way he trailed off. He waited for Yoongi to collect his thoughts.
“Jungkook, I- I think he may have been trying to abduct her.”
Jungkook felt like the room had suddenly tilted. The idea of that – God, the idea of anything remotely close to that – made him feel violently ill.
He looked at your face then, noticing how it wasn’t scrunched up in pain; you actually looked quite peaceful despite the circumstances, almost like you were simply in a deep slumber. He tried hard to swallow around the ever-growing lump that was still forming in his throat when he brushed his fingertips along the length of your arm.
You were here, physically here. He could see you and he could touch you. Yoongi had saved you in time before you had been whisked away to who knows where. The fact that Kun had even dared to try to take you away… the possibility of you being gone and Jungkook not knowing where you had been taken to or if he’d ever see you again-
It made Jungkook see red.
This isn’t the life he wanted for you. He never wanted you to have to look over your shoulder in fear at the idea of someone following you, like you’d been doing the last several weeks. He never ever wanted you to get hurt, especially in such a way as this.
He could feel anger flowing through his veins, seeping into his bones and consuming him, with the only thing able to ground him right now being the feeling of your soft hand enveloped by his own.
Yoongi was saying more but Jungkook couldn’t make it out over his own voice screaming at him inside his head. His mind was waging a war with itself, questioning so many things-
Was he really the best person for you?
Was there someone out there who could protect you, who could keep you safe in ways he couldn’t?
Would loving you be enough if he could never fully promise you peace?
“Jungkook,” Yoongi’s stern voice cut through the thick fog of his mind and Jungkook shook his head to try clear it completely. He focused his attention on his friend that was now staring at him, sporting a frown on his face full of concern.
“Did you hear anything I just said?”
Jungkook gulped. “Honestly? No.”
Yoongi’s frown intensified. “Kook-”
“Don’t, just- please repeat it. Please.”
Yoongi sighed, closing his eyes for a moment before he continued. “I was saying that Kun threw her to the ground and that’s how she hit her head.”
Jungkook’s unoccupied hand balled into a fist and he clenched his jaw. Yoongi could see him tense up but continued speaking.
“I asked Jimin to fetch Jin seeing as he’s had more medical training than any of us and I figured it’d be better than waiting on an ambulance.”
He had barely gotten the last word out before there was hurried knocking on the door. Yoongi walked over to the door quickly to open it, and Jin rushed in without a moment’s hesitation.
“Sorry it took so long, I needed to get supplies.” He made his way to the couch, crouching down in front of it next to Jungkook. He placed the bag he was carrying down onto the ground beside him as he started sifting through it to find other things he needed. Jungkook watched Jin without really seeing him, flinching a little when he felt a hand on his shoulder.
“Kook,” Yoongi said softly as Jungkook looked up at him. “We need to let Jin look at her. C’mon,” he patted his shoulder before walking away, and Jungkook knew Yoongi expected him to follow him.
Jungkook also knew Yoongi was right, and he needed to let Jin get to work. He hated the thought of leaving you, but he knew he wasn’t going far. In fact, he wasn’t even going to leave the room, and if he was encouraged to, well-
There wasn’t anything anyone could do to make him leave that room short of physically removing him themselves. And with how wound up Jungkook was about this entire situation, that wouldn’t be an easy feat by any means.
Thankfully, Yoongi didn’t ask him to leave, opting instead to offer him his office chair. Jungkook graciously accepted the offer and sat down, briefly observing how Jin carefully examined you from across the room before he placed his head in his hands.
⊱──────── ✬ ✬ ✬ ────────⊰
Some time passed before Jungkook felt like he could properly breathe again. And he was only feeling like that now because you had finally started to stir.
As soon as the faintest noise was heard from you, Jungkook was out of his seat and in front of the couch again.
You groaned as you rubbed your eyes, trying to adjust to the light by blinking a few times. After doing this, you tilted your head to the side and your eyes landed on Jungkook. He inhaled sharply, feeling like he might break apart when you gave him the sweetest smile.
“Koo,” you breathed out softly as your hand reached up to caress his cheek. He vaguely heard Jin telling Yoongi something about you still having decent control over your motor skills being a good sign, but right now all his focus was on you specifically.
Well, he was also focusing on not having a breakdown, but you were most important.
His hand came up to cover yours that was still on his face and for the first time in what felt like ages, his lips curved upward into a smile.
“Hey, angel,” he responded. “How are you feeling?”
Your eyebrows furrowed. “Well, my head hurts but otherwise I’m fine? A little sore, though-”
“That’s probably from your fall earlier,” Jin interrupted, pulling your attention back to him. You looked at him, bewildered.
“I fell? When did I fall?”
Yoongi and Jungkook shared a look then, and Jungkook would be lying if he said you not remembering what happened didn’t worry him.
It worried him a lot, actually.
Jin hummed. “We can talk about it later. I need to examine you now though, ok? Make sure you don’t have any signs of a concussion or something else.”
The scared look on your face made Jungkook’s chest tighten.
“O-ok, yeah, sure. Do whatever you need to,” you said as you tried to sit up straight, Jungkook and Jin both helping to steady you as you did.
It didn’t take long for Jin to conduct his examination. While he was checking you over, Yoongi relayed the events from earlier to you and Jungkook observed as the look in your eyes switched from one of confusion to one of horror the more Yoongi went on.
“I-I remember now. Right before you came out there, Kun told me-” you trailed off, speaking to Yoongi but looking over at Jungkook now. His heart started beating painfully when you paused.
“What did he tell you, baby?”
You inhaled unevenly, the sight tearing Jungkook up even more on the inside. “He told me that he wanted to see your reaction when I was nowhere to be found.”
This time, he swore his heart stopped.
So Kun had not only planned to take you away, but he wanted to make sure you couldn’t be found?
Jungkook made a promise to himself then and there that if he ever saw Kun again, he’d-
Your pleading tone made Jungkook’s eyes snap back up to your face. You were trying to give him a small smile, but he could still see the fear lying behind your eyes.
“It’s going to be ok,” you attempted to reassure him. “Don’t worry.”
Jungkook had no idea how you could sit here an expect him not to worry but he didn’t want to fight you on it. You’d both had enough excitement for one night so all he did was nod and hope that would suffice for now.
His mind was starting to race again with the same kind of thoughts he had earlier, plaguing him with questions he didn’t know the answers to.
Frankly, he didn’t even know if he wanted the answers either.
Jin stood up from where he was seated on the floor, straightening himself up and stretching his long limbs. “She’s going to be fine. Just keep an eye on her for the next few days, but I don’t see anything to be alarmed about. If anything changes, you can call me but also if you’re more comfortable going to a hospital, that’s fine too. I won’t be offended.”
Jungkook smiled at his eldest friend. “Thank you, Jin. Seriously, thank you.”
Jin nodded, offering a warm smile to you before exiting the room.
Yoongi walked over to the couch and ruffled your hair. Jungkook watched the exchange with fondness, seeing two of the people he cared about most in the world also caring for each other.
“I’m so glad you’re ok,” Yoongi said, sounding utterly tired. You thanked him again for what he had done, and Jungkook left the two of you alone momentarily so he could check on Jimin and Hoseok at the bar. They entertained him for all of maybe 5 seconds before shooing him away, assuring him that they could handle things and that he should just take you home and be with you right now.
Jungkook thought nothing sounded better.
When he made it back to Yoongi’s office, he saw that you were now sitting on the armrest of the couch. Yoongi must have helped you get up from the couch, seeing as he was standing beside you, and Jungkook strode over to take his place now with an arm around your waist. Yoongi didn’t say anything about him leaving other than to wish you both a goodnight and that he would talk to Jungkook later.
Jungkook helped you walk to the car, not letting you go for even a fraction of a second, despite your teasing him about being able to walk on your own. Be that as it may, he still wouldn’t let go, because the truth of the matter was he was just too scared to.
It wasn’t until you were both in the car riding home that Jungkook let those negative thoughts devour him once more.
And this time, they were almost impossible to shake away.
⊱──────── ✬ ✬ ✬ ────────⊰
When both of you finally arrived home, Jungkook opened the door and surveyed the room before letting you go inside. You knew his paranoia was at an all-time high right now and frankly you couldn’t blame him; you were still really unsettled, too.
But you were more of the mindset that it’s in the past now and there’s nothing anyone can do about it. You never liked to dwell too long on things and Jungkook was becoming better about that as well.
You weren’t sure if it’d be that easy this time, though.
He’d barely said a word to you the whole ride home, and even now as you were both standing by the front door while he locked it, he was still eerily quiet. Once it was sufficiently locked enough by Jungkook’s standards, he gave you one last look before he started walking down the hallway. You frowned and followed him.
“Baby? Talk to me.” It looked like he was trying to go to the kitchen, but it was still dark in the house since he’d barely turned on any of the lights, so you weren’t sure. Still no answer.
“Jungkook.” You called out sternly this time and just barely spotted him as he disappeared into the kitchen. When he heard you walk in, he finally spoke.
“You should eat something, what do you want?”
His voice broke your heart.
“I’m not hungry-”
“You can go lay down, Jin said you didn’t have a concussion so it should be fine. I can bring some food up for you.” He was leaning against the counter in front of the sink, his back turned to you and his head hanging somewhat.
He sounded not at all like himself, and it scared you. Not in the way that you were scared of him, but you were scared because you didn’t know what to do.
Talking was obviously getting you nowhere, so you instead walked up to him and wrapped your arms around him from behind, placing your cheek against his back. He flinched.
“Baby, please,” his voice sounded like it was breaking so you just held him tighter, hoping he could feel your love from the way you embraced him as if you never wanted to let him go.
“Koo, I need you to talk to me. I need to know what’s wrong-”
“What’s wrong is me,” he gritted out, tone louder than before and it made you jump. He then released himself from your arms and tried to walk away.
“Jungkook, wait,” you scrambled to go after him, catching him before he could disappear into another room, this time turning him around to face you. He was leaning against the wall and didn’t try to move past you anymore, but he avoided your gaze.
“Koo, look at me,” you stressed, ducking down to peek up at him. He finally raised his head so you could look into his eyes at a normal level. You noticed the tears in the corner of his eyes, and it nearly made you start crying yourself.
Jungkook never hid his vulnerability from you, he never hid anything from you. But even so, it was still a rare sight to see him cry.
“Why do you want to be around me right now,” he questioned, voice wavering and you recognized the sound. He was trying to hold himself back from crying.
“Koo, what do you mean, why wouldn’t I want to be around you? I love you-”
“I couldn’t protect you,” his voice rose in pitch, not to talk over you but because he was just so upset. “I couldn’t save you, I wasn’t around to help you- God, baby, you got fucking attacked and I wasn’t there.”
He was trembling and you tried to steady him by placing your hands on his shoulders. Tears were flowing freely down his cheeks now, and they were bound to start pooling in your own eyes any second.
“None of that is your fault,” you emphasized your words by squeezing his shoulders. “Ok? No one could have predicted what that psycho was gonna do, not you, not me, not Yoongi, nobody.”
“For fuck’s sake, he almost kidnapped you-”
“But he didn’t and I’m here.” You brushed his cheek to wipe some of the tears away and he choked back a sob. “I’m here, with you, and that’s what matters.”
“I could have lost you,” he said it just above a whisper as you moved to brush the tears away from his other cheek.
You blinked back your own tears. “You didn’t lose me.”
“But I could have. We have no idea what the fuck he’s capable of and just- every time I think about what might have happened if no one got to you in time, I start to lose my mind.”
You wrapped your arms around his neck and reached up on your tip-toes to place a gentle kiss on his lips, heart lurching when he actually kissed you back and his hands found purchase on your waist as they usually did.
“You didn’t lose me. You have me. All of me. I’m right here,” you kissed him once more. “And I’m not going anywhere.”
Jungkook let out a sob as he pulled you closer, nearly crushing you with his embrace. You ran your hand through his hair to try and soothe him when he leaned his forehead on your shoulder.
“I was so fucking scared,” he said against your skin. “So terrified. I love you so much,” a tender kiss was placed on the side of your neck now, and you could feel his lips still trembling.
“I love you,” your response prompted another small sob from him, “I love you more than anyone or anything else in this world and I’ll show you that everyday for the rest of my life, as long as you let me.”
“Baby-” Jungkook’s voice cracked with so much raw emotion and you couldn’t help yourself anymore. You were determined to show him your conviction behind your statement, so with your hand still buried in his hair, you pulled him down to your level once more as you crashed your lips together.
You’d never felt anything quite like the emotions that coursed through you every single time you kissed Jungkook. It didn’t matter if it was the cute good morning kisses upon waking up, the silly, laughter-filled ones that happened in the midst of playing around, or the intense ones bursting with passion that always led to something more. Each one was different and better than the last, and it was like a language between you both filled with unspoken words that demonstrated exactly what you felt.
This was one of the many ways the two of your expressed your devotion to one another, through an action as simple as kissing yet the feelings it always evoked inside of you were anything but. And even during times like tonight when you’d both endured something extremely emotional, you could still find comfort in each other through these gestures.
When you finally broke apart, you were both panting breathlessly, and Jungkook rested his forehead against yours.
“Sorry, baby,” Jungkook breathed, voice somewhat raspy. His fingers had started gripping your waist harder during the exchange, but you felt them start to loosen.
That was most definitely something you didn’t want, so you placed your hands on the sides of his face and looked him in the eyes.
“Koo,” you spoke softly, cautiously, as if you were testing the waters. “Can I give you all of me?”
His eyes sparkled with the realization of what you were implying, and for a moment you wondered if he would reject you. And if he did, that would be completely fine with you because his comfort mattered most of all to you right now, as it always did. Tonight had been a lot to deal with and you weren’t sure what mindset he would be in about this sort of thing-
That thought remained unfinished in your mind as Jungkook captured your lips again and all other rational thought went out the window. All you could focus on now was how Jungkook’s body felt melded up against yours, how his mouth was exploring yours like he’d done so many times before, how his fingers dug into your skin like he was afraid to let you go.
You jumped up and Jungkook wrapped your legs around his waist, never breaking the kiss while he turned you around so that your back was against the wall. You heard a low groan come from him as you intensified the kiss before he pulled away.
“Angel, are you sure about this?” He was holding you up with help from the wall, hands placed on your thighs just underneath your ass. Your hand was playing with the hair at the nape of his neck since you knew how much he loved that. “The last thing I want to do is hurt you-”
“Koo, I’m fine. I feel fine and I’m not in pain. I promise. I want this. I want you,” you gave him another searing kiss that you felt yourself melting into. “But only if you want it too.”
Jungkook’s next kiss knocked the breath out of you and he swallowed the surprised whimper you let out. “Of course, baby. I always want you.”
His words never failed to make you feel warm all over, with love and adoration as well as arousal. Right now, you were feeling all of these things as he situated your legs around his waist in a more comfortable position.
“Do you want to do this here,” he panted as his eyes met yours again. You could tell he was getting worked up just having you like this here against the wall, so you wasted no time answering him.
“Yes Koo, please,” you urged him to continue. “Wanna feel you close. Don’t wanna wait.”
“Fuck, I mean, I could take us upstairs-” his words ended with a grunt as you drew him closer by wrapping your legs tighter around him, making him grind against you. His head dipped down to rest against your shoulder as he let out shallow breaths, his fingers threatening to make indentations in your skin.
In a somewhat frenzied manner, Jungkook put you back down on your feet so the both of you could remove your clothes, too impatient to take everything off and only getting rid of what was necessary. When both of your lower halves were bare, he secured you around his waist once more, his length rapidly hardening against your now naked thigh.
You reached in between the two of you to wrap your hand around him, and the feeling was enough to have him inhaling sharply before he kissed you with a newfound urgency. You could tell by the way he was moaning against your mouth that your teasing caresses were working and within no time he was ready. You let out a stuttered moan when Jungkook’s long fingers disappeared inside of you so he could make sure you were stretched enough.
When he deemed you prepped enough – and when you started rocking against his fingers with impatient whimpers – he withdrew so he could line himself up with you. Your already soaked folds were threatening to pull him in, and it was almost too much for him to handle in his heightened emotional state.
He pushed in slowly, inch by inch, as he always did. The stretch made you lean your head back against the wall, his soft curses only spurring you on even more. On other nights you might would try to coax him to be a little rougher because you knew you could take it, but tonight you weren’t in a rush for anything, and neither was he. Tonight was about you two being together as one, relishing the way you shared this connection with each other and conveying it through this intimate act.
Both of you sighed in pleasure when Jungkook bottomed out, finally experiencing that complete closeness the two of you craved more than anything else right now. His hands gripped your ass firmly to start moving you up and down his length in slow, steady strokes. He didn’t want to take things fast or go hard tonight – he just wanted to enjoy this feeling, having you so close and yet still wanting to pull you impossibly closer.
The feeling of your warmth around him mixed with the tousling of your hands in his hair was driving him crazy. Every touch from you, no matter how small, always ignited something within him that he couldn’t explain. He was so unapologetically, wholeheartedly in love with you.
And he’d just come so close to losing you.
Pain twisted his heart as he stared at you, watching your face scrunch up in the most beautiful way. Your head was tilted back with your eyes crinkled shut while his name was falling from your lips in hushed whispers. Each thrust was pushing you further up the wall before he would bring you back down again, and your arms wound themselves around his neck to help anchor yourself further.
You looked ethereal, and Jungkook was trying so hard to focus on you and not the negative thoughts that were once again settling uncomfortably in his mind. His body was fighting itself on whether he should succumb to the pleasure he was feeling or if he should submit to the dark cloud blanketing his mind.
His change in demeanor didn’t go unnoticed by you.
Jungkook continued to move inside of you, keeping a consistent pace, but something wasn’t right. He was looking at you, but he wasn’t looking at you. He had a pained expression on his face, and that’s what kicked your own worry into gear.
“Koo, baby, hey what’s wrong?” You held his face in both of your hands and watched as he crumbled underneath your touch. He had slid his hands up to rest against your back now in an attempt to embrace you further, hands trapped in between you and the wall.
You almost started panicking when you saw the tears start to brim in his eyes again.
“I just-” he choked on a cry and your heart wrenched at the sound, “I can’t stop thinking about it.” He was still moving but his pace had slowed down to a near stop.
“Thinking about what?” You weren’t sure you wanted to know but you needed him to talk to you.
“Thinking about losing you, I can’t-”
His hands reached up higher to grasp onto your shirt you were still wearing, clenching the fabric in his fists as he dragged it down. You could feel the collar of the front of your shirt tightening around you while he hid his head in the crook of your neck and started to shake. You wrapped your arms around him as tightly as you could and ran a hand through his hair, trying to soothe him.
“Please stay,” he whispered, almost too quiet for you to hear. “Please stay with me.”
“I love you so much, I don’t want to lose you,” more sobs wracked through his body. He had otherwise stilled inside of you but made no effort to move away. “I can’t lose you, I-”
“Baby, look at me.”
Jungkook slowly brought his head up to face you, the sight making you want to break down yourself. He looked so defeated, so broken, and his eyes were shining with tears he didn’t bother hiding anymore.
You cradled his face in your hands, rubbing your thumbs across his cheekbones before they travelled to trace along the curves of his jawline.
You placed a gentle kiss on his forehead, listening as he tried to control his erratic breathing. “I won’t leave you.”
A soft kiss on his lips. “I’ll never leave you.”
You brushed his hair back from his face, and his eyes captivated you as they swirled with so much intense emotion.
“I promised you forever, and I intend to keep it. Nothing, and no one, is going to keep me from you. I love you too much to let that happen,” you granted him a sweet smile and brushed your thumb across his lower lip that had started to quiver. He sniffled as you continued.
“Do you remember our wedding vows?”
Jungkook swallowed as he nodded, seeming a little calmer now.
Your smile widened, and your own set of fresh tears had gathered in the corners of your eyes, ready to spill. “Remember how I told I would give you all of me? That I would give you the best of me?”
He nodded again, and your heart soared at the tiny smile he presented you with.
“I promised you those things. So, no matter what happens, I’ll never leave you. And with everything life throws as us from here on out, we’ll make it through together.”
His smile was widening into the familiar, bunny-like grin you knew and loved dearly. Your Jungkook was coming back to you, and it was almost like you could see the dark fog that had surrounded him evaporating before your very eyes.
“I love you, Jeon Jungkook.” You leaned up to tenderly press your lips to his once more, smiling into the kiss as he let out a content sigh. “You’re my person. My forever. Please always remember that.”
You had swept a long lock of hair back from his face as you finished your words, and while you were distracted with that, Jungkook stared at you like you hung the moon and all the stars.
Your declarations of love stirred something inside of him and it dawned on him then that he was still inside of you. This was made more evident when you shifted in his embrace, probably to make yourself more comfortable since you were still against the wall, but it caused your walls to clench around him.
He closed his eyes and groaned, the sound causing arousal to radiate throughout your body. The two of you clearly must have forgotten the position you were in but that was no longer the case when you felt him twitch inside of you.
“Fuck,” he moaned at the sight of you when he opened his eyes again, his hands letting go of your shirt in favor of settling on your waist. Your cheeks were still flushed, with drying tear stains running down them. You were panting softly and Jungkook’s heart felt like it might burst with all the love he had for you.
“I love you,” he declared while he brushed his nose with yours. “And I honestly cannot believe I forgot I was fucking you, like how does that even happen.”
You giggled, kissing the tip of his nose before you drew back to rest contentedly against the wall. “I’m not sure, but do you perhaps want to finish what we started?”
You moved your hips as best you could at your current angle, and it pushed his cock further inside you, making you both moan at the action. He captured one of your hands in his and brought it up to place a kiss on your knuckles.
“Will you still let me give you all of me,” you reiterated your phrase from earlier in the night before all of this started. Jungkook’s eyes had darkened now with lust and he gave you a sly smile.
“Always, baby,” was his response. “Question now though,” he leaned down to let his lips ghost along your neck, making you shiver, “is can you take all of me?”
You tugged on his hair for him to look up at you, making him hiss in the process. You gave him your best challenging stare, and hoped it was convincing.
“Always,” you copied him, “I can easily take anything you give me.”
Jungkook arched an eyebrow and you felt his length twitch at your words. “Is that so?
You barely had time to nod before he was pinning your hand that he was holding on the wall beside your head, his other one gripping your waist hard enough now you knew it would leave a mark.
He pulled out almost all the way before he thrusted back into you hard, making you whine embarrassingly loud. He chuckled dark and low then, squeezing your hand as he intertwined your fingers.
“Too much for you, angel?” Jungkook knew he couldn’t keep this up forever and that he’d eventually crack himself, but he never missed an opportunity to tease you like this. “Thought you said you could take everything I give you.”
You nodded vigorously, not an easy feat with your head leaning against the wall. “I can, I can take it,” you breathed out, clenching around him to try and persuade him to move again. He stuttered out a low moan, determined to not lose his composure just yet.
“Yeah? You sure? Does that mean you want more?” He was shallowly moving inside of you at a torturously slow pace, the drag of his cock against your walls pulling a loud noise of desperation from your throat.
“Please,” you begged, not even caring how desperate you sounded. You just wanted to feel him, all of him, and your core throbbed at the thought of him finally relenting and fucking you how you wanted. “Please give it to me. Please give me more.”
“Fuck, baby, I love hearing you beg for me,” Jungkook moaned, readjusting his grip on your hip. “Gonna give you exactly what you want.”
He hungrily kissed you for a few moments, sinking further into you before he pulled back, panting as he placed his forehead against yours, eyes closed.
“Angel?” His voice was low and just the tone alone made you clench.
He opened his eyes and smiled. “You might wanna hold on tight.”
You just had enough time to wrap your unoccupied arm around his back before he started pounding into you like his life depended on it. He slammed into you repeatedly, making you scream out his name over and over again whenever he’d hit that bundle of nerves inside of you. You gripped his shirt to have something to ground yourself with, and your eyes rolled back as he increased his pace.
Jungkook was grunting into your skin, teeth grazing against your neck. “You feel so fucking good, always so tight and perfect for me, my perfect angel.” He squeezed your hand hard enough that his knuckles were taut, but it didn’t hurt you. If anything, it turned you on more because he was finally letting go, caring more about just being in the moment with you than potentially hurting you.
And you knew he still did care about that, he always would; he was Jungkook, after all. But time and time again you had pleaded with him to stop handling you like you would break under the slightest amount of pressure. This was the first time he did without hesitation or working himself up to it.
And you fucking loved it.
In fact, it was overwhelming enough to the point where you knew you weren’t going to last long at all with the way he was drilling into you. All the emotions the two of you had endured tonight mixed with the passionate entanglement you found yourself wrapped up in now, it was no surprise that you were hurtling toward your undoing at a very fast pace.
“Koo, baby, oh my God-” you finally found your voice again, running your nails down his back, hard enough that if he hadn’t been still wearing his shirt, you’re sure it would have left scratch marks.
“Fuck, angel, can feel you around me, always so good for me,” his tongue darted out past his lips before he captured your bottom one between his teeth and tugged on it gently. “Always my good girl.”
His words made you spasm around him, and he moaned loudly at the feeling, eyes fluttering shut. His damp hair was falling into his face so you brushed it back, gasping at the sight of him.
You’d seen Jungkook like this many times before, but this time? This time was different.
A few curls were still framing his face but he had his head tilted back and his lips parted as the most amazing sounds escaped from them. His brows were furrowed and he looked almost pained, but in a completely different way than he had earlier that night.
Your heart ached at the memory, but you didn’t have long to think about it before he pulled you more flush against his chest, now opting to grab your ass with both hands so he could move you up and down his cock with his strength alone.
“Holy shit,” he breathed out, “I love you so much, angel, just wanna stay with you like this forever.” He was speeding up again and with the new angle, your body felt like it was on fire. You couldn’t even make a noise as the stimulation kept hitting you in wave after wave.
“You said earlier,” Jungkook continued, a little breathless now but never letting up on his powerful thrusts, “that I was – fuck – that I was your person.”
You nodded, still not really able to say anything or make any sound because your orgasm was approaching fast and you didn’t want it to happen so soon. Not until you knew he was there with you.
“Did you mean it,” he asked, hooded eyes trying to search yours. You kissed him with all the strength you could muster, swallowing down his moans as your walls clenched around him.
“Of course I did. I meant everything I said earlier.” A high-pitched moan tore itself from your throat when his hips snapped into you harder at your words.
“Fuck, it always does something to me when you say things like that,” he was losing his composure now, you could tell it by the way he sounded.
His admission made you chuckle fondly. “You know, you said something similar the first time we were together.”
Jungkook opened his eyes to stare at you and grinned at the memory. “Yeah, I did. Meant it then and I mean it now too.”
“I’m glad I still have that kind of effect on you,” you responded, breaking off to moan loudly at a harsher thrust. Jungkook’s grip on you tightened, and he increased his pace, finally pulling you over the edge.
“You do, holy shit, you really do. I hope I can say the same- fuck,” Jungkook knew you were close with the way your walls kept spasming around him every few seconds. “Gonna cum for me, baby?”
You nodded and whined, holding onto his shirt for dear life while he rocked you through the first stages of your euphoric bliss. He was panting right by your ear now, the sounds making your eyes roll back.
“Go on, cum for me then. Fucking love when you cum all over my cock,” Jungkook’s filthy words had you moaning out his name. “My beautiful angel,” he continued, pulling down the collar of your shirt slightly so he could place a kiss on your collarbone. “Always so pretty for me.”
“Fuck, I’m close, Koo, want you there with me,” you opened your eyes in time to see him pulling his lip between his teeth.
“I’m right there, baby, let go for me,” he reached in between the two of you and barely brushed your clit before your sudden orgasm made you clench so hard around him that he had to throw his head back and let out a guttural moan.
“Angel, fuuuuck, I’m right there, I’m-” you crashed your lips against his and swallowed down every loud noise he made, feeling his lips tremble against yours as his hips stuttered when he filled you up with his release.
He broke apart from you with a gasp, leaning his head back and letting out a strained “holy fuck” before he looked at you again. He slowed down now, thrusting a few more times before he stilled completely, breathing hard.
He moved you away from the wall, and you thought he might put you down but instead he tightened your legs more securely around him and walked the two of you over to the nearest bathroom to shower, his lips never leaving yours the whole way there.
Thank fuck Jungkook had such great muscle memory and knew where he was going because you definitely couldn’t have pulled that off.
He stayed inside you until he was able to put you in the shower, helping you discard the rest of your clothes before he did the same and joined you. It was your usual ritual and preferred form of aftercare since the water from the shower soothed any sore muscles and it helped you get clean in the process. Not to mention it was another way for you to be close to Jungkook, him only reiterating that truth now and he pulled your back against his chest so he could massage shampoo into your hair.
“Love you,” he whispered softly, placing a kiss on your temple since you leaned your head back at the feeling of his touch. He treated you so delicately now, the complete opposite of how he was just fucking you up against the wall. You loved moments like this just as much, always receptive to everything Jungkook did, every touch that flittered across your skin.
“I love you,” was your response as you turned around to wrap your arms around his neck and pulled him into a chaste kiss. He smiled into it, his fingertips brushing against the skin right above your waist.
After your shower, Jungkook carried you upstairs, ignoring your attempts at getting him to put you down because as you told him repeatedly your legs worked just fine and you could walk by yourself. His response?
“Don’t care, still wanna carry you.”
All you could do then was huff, pulling a laugh from the man you loved so much, the sound always beautiful and able to make your heart skip a beat.
When you were both snuggled into bed, you found it hard to sleep. There were still things you two needed to discuss, but you didn’t have the energy – and not really the want – right now to bring them up.
However, Jungkook did.
“Hey,” he was running his hand through your hair as you were laying your head on his shoulder. You hummed in response.
“I’m sorry,” he started, and before you could interrupt he quickly went on. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there to protect you, but I’m also sorry about how I acted earlier.”
“Koo, it’s fine-”
“Please don’t,” his eyes were pleading and you let him continue.
“It’s not fine, it’s- I get in my head sometimes and it can be hard to come back from that. You’re always able to bring me back, but tonight…fuck, it was bad.” There was a frown on his face now and you tried to make it disappear by placing a kiss on his cheek.
“I kept thinking about how maybe I’m not the best for you-”
You couldn’t help interrupting this time. “Jungkook, you are the best for me.”
“We don’t know that though-”
“I don’t have to, because I know in my heart that you’ll do whatever it takes to make sure we have the best life together, the same as I’ll do for you.” You brushed a curl out of his face before you continued, “Only for you.”
He cracked a smile. “That’s my line.”
You shrugged, giggling when Jungkook began trying to poke your sides. “Regardless though, I don’t want you feeling that way. You’re enough, Jungkook, you’re more than enough.”
His smile widened. “Really?”
“Really.” You thought about it for a second. “What can I do to convince you?”
He raised an eyebrow, eyes full of mischief. “Well, I can think of a way…” he said in a suggestive tone, making you roll your eyes before you turned away from him. His laughter fell on your ears and you couldn’t help the smile that broke out on your face.
“Hey, c’mon, you know I’m just kidding,” he turned you to face him again, running his hand up and down your side now.
“No you’re not,” you snorted.
He pretended to think about it for a moment. “Ok, you’re right- but I know you’re too tired so I’m half kidding? Sorta?”
It was your turn to laugh then, huddling closer to him as you wrapped your arms around his neck and placed a kiss on his throat.
His hands found their way into your hair again, and he continued to run them through the strands long enough that you almost fell asleep until he spoke up again.
“We need to do something about him, though.”
The way he said ‘him’ let you know exactly who he was talking about.
You nodded, sliding your head up to lay in the crook of his neck. “We will. But that’s a problem for another day. Right now,” you yawned, “we need sleep.”
He chuckled and kissed the top of your head. “Get some sleep, angel. I’ll stay up a little bit to make sure you’re ok. Jin said it was a good idea for tonight, anyway.”
You were already nuzzling deeper into his embrace, barely registering his words. “Mm-hmm,” came your sluggish response. “Goodnight, Koo.”
“Night, baby,” was his last response you heard before slumber took over, the feeling of his strong arms around you more comforting than anything else you’d ever known.
Jungkook stayed awake for a few hours, listening to your soft snoring and observing you as you slept peacefully. There was a gentle ache tugging at his heart as he remembered everything that you’d been through that night, but when you unconsciously snuggled closer, he felt the ache dissipate.
He made a promise to himself that whatever happened in the future, he would be there for you. He would keep you as safe as he could, and love you with everything he had.
After all, you were his person, just as he was yours, and he hoped that’s how it would stay.
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