#bandit/ace

[kiruuuuu]

Kiru's Advent Calendar, Day 23🏆

The day is here - finally, the Great Rainbow Bake Off actually takes place! Read all about who won and why :) This whole series was really fun to write and I hope everyone enjoyed it as much as I did 💕 (Rating T, chaos/fluff, ~3.8k words)

.

The outpour of support is overwhelming. IQ helped her source and install a few more ovens in Rainbow’s canteen, multiple people provided identical utensils, appliances and other kitchen needs, and both Mozzie and Echo volunteered for the camera work. Even Mute got involved and set up a livestream and a large screen in the lounge so absolutely everyone can follow the competition without getting in the way. Identifying the two judges was easy and Twitch herself is content in merely commenting on the proceedings and making sure everyone gets their time to shine. As host, it’s her duty to introduce the contestants as well as set an appropriate mood, and if the complete silence in the lounge next door is anything to go by, the pastries she provided for the audience are doing the trick.

After explaining the format a little and welcoming everyone, she turns to face the orderly queue of bakers with Sledge at the helm.

“I’m confident”, he replies to her question of how he feels about today. “It’s been a while since I worked this hard on anything, and I’m already proud of what I’ve accomplished so far. As long as I don’t accidentally break anything, I should be good.”

Once he’s moved out of the frame and to his workstation, Kapkan takes his place, facing the camera stoically. “I am going to win”, he states and immediately leaves.

“Against popular demand, I will not reprise my brownies from Rainbow’s first Christmas party. I do value my pay check too much.” Bandit grins at the instant uproar from the lounge and good-naturedly flips everyone off.

Finally, Dokkaebi appears, already wearing her apron, her hair neatly pulled back. “I’m just here to prove that Asians can bake”, she says as if anyone had ever questioned that fact.

Huh. Twitch turns to the other end of the room where Ace is busy listening to a seemingly endless anecdote by the second judge. Addressing Dokkaebi, she asks: “Did he -”

A nod, followed by a smile that’s a little too bright. “Sure did! That’s why I prepared a special surprise, just for him. To show him what I’m capable of.”

Fair enough, Twitch is intrigued. After everyone has taken position, she motions her judges over and addresses the four contestants who display varying levels of excitement (ranging from manic by Dokkaebi to deadpan by Kapkan). “Welcome to your first and only challenge today here at the first Great Rainbow Bake Off. These are your judges, Håvard and Adriano, and they would like -”

“Wait.” Sledge seems confused. “Why are you a judge, Adrianito?”

Twitch has never before witnessed Maestro being at a loss for words. He squirms uncomfortably next to her, starting a few sentences yet unable to follow through, and after a few seconds, Sledge is overcome by a sudden realisation.

“You can bake!”, he accuses with the same gravitas a widow would the murderer of her husband. “You lied to me.”

“I had to, cioccolatino, you would have used me to cheat.”

“Maybe we can postpone this conversation until -” Her attempt at defusing the situation is interrupted by the righteous fury of a Scotsman wronged.

“I trusted you. I felt for you. And as I stood there, filled with the despair of a man doomed to fail, as I laid my soul bare in our kitchen, all this time you could’ve fixed it? Was all my blood, sweat and tears just a game to you? I saw how well you slept, your conscience clean, did my plight mean nothing to you?”

Sledge’s emotion-laden roar easily triumphs over Maestro’s weak excuses. “I can’t be accused of favouritism, amore mio, I didn’t want -”

“After this, nobody will ever think of you as anything but impartial, well done, you have made it abundantly clear where your priorities lie and it’s not with your talentless, pitiful husband.”

“Please listen to me -”

“And Jesus wept!”

By now, Bandit looks like he’s going to crack a rib from suppressed laughter any minute. Neither Kapkan nor Dokkaebi seem particularly impressed, and there’s obvious panic lining Ace’s features as he looks back and forth between the arguing couple like it’s a tennis match. Twitch is pretty sure Sledge would be winning if it was, and also absolutely certain the Scotsman has spent entirely too much time with the Martello family and their dramatic streak. “Perhaps it’s better -”

“I will be baking today, but you know what? I am not doing it for you anymore.”

Sledge’s crossed arms indicate his side of the conversation to be over, and though Maestro must be dying a thousand deaths inside, he pulls himself together and lifts his chin defiantly. “Very well. I look forward to the results.”

“Get a room”, Dokkaebi comments and earns two genuinely frightening glares.

“In any case”, Twitch continues as if nothing happened at all, “the, uh, judges would, um, like you to make sixteen identical cookies. They don’t need to be Christmas-themed, although it doesn’t hurt your chances, and they should be baked well, taste amazing, and have just the right consistency. You have one and a half hours – on your marks, get set, bake!”

And it’s wonderful to watch them just burst into activity, getting out mixing bowls and scales, sort their ingredients, check their recipes. Like a bunch of well-oiled machines who form something greater than the sum of its parts.

“Should we make the rounds? Check on everyone?”, Twitch suggests to her two judges. Maestro’s expression gives nothing away as he nods, so she leans over to him to whisper: “Do you need a quick cry? Or are you alright?”

“I’m perfectly fine”, he assures her and she chooses to ignore his quivering lip.

As it so happens, Sledge is the first one they approach. “So, Seamus – what are you baking for us today?”

“Shortbread with a side of betrayal”, he replies evenly and when Maestro immediately starts defending himself again, Twitch and Ace exchange a brief look before sidestepping to Kapkan’s workbench instead, dragging Mozzie with them so the other two men can argue in peace.

“So, um, Maxim, what kind of cookies are you making?”

“Pryaniki”, comes the curt answer.

“What are they?”

“Delicious.”

“I mean… what are they made of?”

“Flour. And honey.”

“Just flour and honey?”

“Some other stuff, too.”

“Okay. Great talk. Thanks and good luck!” Twitch and Ace just shrug at each other, unsure of what they’re going to be eating later, and then move on to Bandit who’s currently watching his stand mixer beat some air into what looks like egg whites.

“Hi”, he greets them cheerfully, straightaway putting Twitch on edge.

“These are egg whites, right?”, she inquires with a healthy amount of scepticism.

“Yep.”

“… just egg whites.”

“Sure are.”

“Nothing else.”

“Of course not.”

He continues beaming at her with possibly fake innocence as the noise level rises in the other room, the other operators no doubt speculating as to the actual composition of the stiffening mass. “He wouldn’t be so crass”, Ace dismisses Twitch’s suspicion, earning muffled laughter from their audience. His expression slowly shifts from unconcerned to vague dread at that reaction. “… right?”

“Can you tell us a bit about your cookies?”, she intentionally shifts the focus away from what might become a meringue, provided Bandit isn’t lying, which is a 50-50 chance. She’ll take it.

“I could, but I don’t want to”, is his enigmatic reply. “It’ll be a surprise.”

Twitch’s alarm bells are going off and yet she forces a smile. “Well, we’re… looking forward to it. Did you practice a lot?”

“Made them once. I’ll be fine.”

As they make their way over to Dokkaebi, Ace addresses her in a conspiratorial whisper: “If that’s a meringue he’s making, he’ll mess it up for sure. You need to bake it long enough but not too long, it needs to be beaten to stiff peaks and I doubt he knows what that looks like, and if he’s folding anything in, he’s likely to knock all the air out of it if he’s not careful. It’s ambitious and I don’t believe he’ll pull it off.”

Though Twitch had much the same thoughts, her inherent optimism refuses to accept Ace’s assessment at face value. She still believes in Bandit, even if he’s prone to sabotage competitions like this one. “Will you be impressed if he gets it right?”

“Yeah, I’ll give him a handshake if he does.”

“How about you snog him if he does!”, Smoke calls from the other side of the room.

Is he even supposed to be in here?

Ace rolls his eyes. “Sure. I have so little faith in him that I accept that.”

The Brit manages to exchange an encouraging thumbs up as well as a wide grin with Bandit before he’s thrown out into the lounge and if she’s honest, Twitch is quietly rooting for Bandit now.

“I actually have a little surprise as well”, Dokkaebi informs them once the attention is on her. “I’m making two kinds of cookies, one is macadamia chocolate chip and the other a very special treat for Ace.”

Interesting. “What makes them so special?”

“Glad you ask.” Thusly prompted, Dokkaebi pulls out a small jar of what looks like to be a light brown paste. “This is an ingredient you don’t find in normal cuisines here, that’s why I really wanted to use it. My second set of cookies will be baked with it, and it’s made specifically for you.”

“I’m intrigued.” Ace eyes the mystery ingredient with a frown. “What’s it called?”

“Gae-sae-kki.” And with a lovely smile, Dokkaebi simply gets on with it.

The next hour and a half is a flurry of events Twitch can’t even summarise succinctly. Sledge and Maestro finally manage to make up after half the time is over, meaning Sledge is scrambling for the rest of the time, running around in a panic until Dokkaebi offers her help which he gladly accepts. Bandit is done early and starts harassing the other bakers, first and foremost Kapkan who eventually challenges him to a blindfolded game of tag – meaning Bandit spends fifteen minutes crashing into things and yelling for Kapkan to disclose his location whereas Kapkan took the blindfold off immediately and went back to icing his pryaniki without a care in the world.

At least one oven malfunctions, Dokkaebi burns her butter and makes everyone cough their lungs out (even next door), Echo nearly commits suicide by Kapkan when he stumbles and almost knocks his finished cookies off the counter, Maestro recounts various stories at least one of which features a bog mummy (it’s not entirely clear with the other two) and Mute features audience-made memes in a corner of the livestream, allowing them to vote on them to keep engagement up.

And then, finally, Twitch gets to announce: “Your time is up! Please stop fiddling with your cookies. Well done, everyone!”

The lounge erupts into loud applause after which they do another short round of interviews while the four contestants clean up their stations. There’s a tension palpable in the air, now that the stress is over: they feel it, it’s getting serious. The judging is about to begin. All eyes are directed to the front, to the small table placed before Maestro and Ace.

Twitch savours the silence a bit longer, relishes the attention for just a moment. She knows how hard they worked during the past week (most of them anyway, she’s not convinced Bandit has worked a day in his life), knows they finally got a taste of what it means to spend hours in the kitchen producing delicious goods to share with others, knows they’re all trying to win. This is partly why she stepped down from judging herself: she’d declare all of them winners, no doubt. She couldn’t pick a favourite.

“Grace, would you like to bring your cookies to the front?”, she eventually prompts, to which Dokkaebi just nods.

Her first batch is beautiful, slightly browned on the outside, a good balance of macadamia nuts and chocolate chips, not too flat but also not too dense either. They’re uniform, all of them the same size and colour. Twitch can tell both judges are impressed. While they’re chewing, she grabs one and tries it herself – and wow.

Okay.

Forget about all that not being able to pick a favourite, this is the best chocolate chip cookie she’s ever eaten. The browned butter gives it a light roast aroma, the brown sugar emphasising this darkish sweetness, and the macadamia nuts lift the taste back up, brighten it a little. It’s delicious. She needs this recipe.

“Amazing”, says Ace, utterly flabbergasted. “These are perfect. I have absolutely nothing negative to say.”

“What a flavour. What a flavour! You have created a miracle, my dear, this is a feast for the senses, utterly divine, if I could choose my last meal on earth right now, it would be this. Never before -”

And while Maestro waxes poetically into the nearest camera, Dokkaebi points to the second, smaller batch she’s presenting. “These are just for you, Ace. I hope you like them.”

The Norwegian eagerly shoves one of the unassuming-looking biscuits into his mouth, likely expecting similar excellence. The longer he chews, the more confused his expression becomes until it flips over into thinly-veiled disgust. With difficulty, he swallows everything and is left grimacing wildly. “An… acquired taste. I’m sure it tastes different to you, but -”

“Oh, I’d never eat this”, she objects, remaining unfailingly pleasant.

Ace blinks at her. “Didn’t you use something traditionally Korean? Or something like that? What was that stuff you showed us?”

“That was just pureed dog food. Merry Christmas!” With that, she grabs the tray with the chocolate chip cookies and walks out the door, only to be greeted with roaring approval in the lounge, the noise deafening for the brief moment before she closes the door behind her.

“I think you deserved that”, Twitch mutters in Ace’s direction, the man staring down at the dog food biscuits in horror and seemingly contemplating his life choices.

“- a poem in baked form”, Maestro finishes his verbose speech and turns back to the two of them. “On to the next one?”

.

They take a short break while Ace brushes his teeth and drinks about a litre of water just to get the taste out of his mouth, and Bandit admits he’s not so sure about wanting to kiss him anymore. Twitch fills Maestro in about what he missed and the Italian laughs so loudly he causes a brief feedback loop and even Mute takes the time to dash into the lounge just to congratulate Dokkaebi.

Twitch does feel a little bad for Ace, all things considered, but he takes it in stride despite his slightly paler face than usual.

“Let’s continue then. Dom, do you want to present your cookies next?”

“Sure.” When he puts his tray down, Twitch instantly knows he won’t need a mistletoe this year. She’s not sure what kind of cookies they are, but she knows a good meringue when she sees one – next to no cracks, shiny on the outside, and when she picks one up, it’s wonderfully light without being sticky.

“They look good”, Ace admits reluctantly.

“Made them especially for you.”

“Forgive me if I’m hesitant to eat them, but the last time I heard that…”

Twitch snorts and is the first to try them. It’s crunchy, lovely and sweet with a hint of almond – probably ground almonds folded into the mixture. And yeah, it’s nice, but… nothing groundbreaking. There’s no twist on it, no personal note she can discern, and it’s certainly no reason to stare motionlessly into space and look like the world just stopped turning. Concerned, she nudges Ace. “You alright?”

He shakes himself out of his stupor and stares at Bandit who’s displaying his trademark smug grin, the one he wears whenever he’s inordinately pleased with himself. “Where did you get this recipe?”

“Remind you of something?” Bandit is positively beaming. “Well, Siv sends her regards. These are her vepsebol.”

Twitch is worried Ace’s eyes are going to fall out of his skull any second now. “You – you talked to my mum?!”

“Yeah, no biggie. She’s absolutely charming. I asked her what your favourite cookie was when you were a kid, and she was kind enough to help me bake it.” No wonder Bandit is exuding self-satisfaction. His grin is contagious and Twitch finds herself smiling along with it. “I told you I was taking this seriously.”

Ace is speechless, for the second time now.

“They are quite good”, Maestro agrees and Twitch considers taking the tray back just so he doesn’t eat them all.

And something happens just then, something shifts in Ace’s expression as he realises the man notorious for playing pranks on everyone, the man said to care about nobody but himself, the very man who’d normally torpedo a happening like this went to the lengths of finding out something this personal about him just so he could present him with cookies from his childhood. No sarcasm, no backhand.

“Do you need a cry?”, she asks him quietly.

“I’m fine”, he replies, a little choked up. “Let’s, let’s just keep going.”

Still radiating smugness, Bandit goes back to his workstation to make space for Sledge.

What looks like plain shortbread turns out to be flavoured with lemon zest and ginger, a delicious combination they all compliment, much to his pride, and Twitch is glad to see the couple back to their usual harmony when Maestro holds yet another speech about how it’s the journey that counts and not the destination, and that he’s so proud of how far Sledge has come.

The implication isn’t lost on her, though. The shortbread is fine, but a little unimpressive.

Kapkan is the only one left and from one peek, Twitch can tell his offering is something else. He’s baked the pryaniki into small slabs and decorated them to perfection, adorned them with simple yet elegant Christmas designs like baubles, stars, a Santa hat and even a delicately feathered fir branch. The royal icing is piped with precision, framing each cookie with a cute ribbon and flooded with white so the colours he’s employed stand out more.

“These look exquisite”, Ace speaks what they’re all thinking. “They’re properly set, and underneath they’re all the same colour.”

Twitch lets out a content hum when the taste spreads on her tongue, a rich, satisfying, warm flavour – there’s all kinds of Christmas-y spices involved and the honey brings it all together. This is exactly the kind of cookie she wants to eat throughout December when it’s cold and wet outside and she needs a little pick-me-up.

The two judges concur with her mental assessment, expressing their enthusiasm vocally to an entirely impassive face, and suddenly it’s time to retreat and choose a winner.

While Maestro and Ace withdraw to a corner of the room to compare the participants’ creations, Twitch joins the four bakers (Dokkaebi begrudgingly returned for the award ceremony) to congratulate them on a job well done.

“I’m just happy with what I made”, Sledge summarises his experience with a sincere nod. “I’ve never spent that much time in the kitchen before and I doubt I’ll do it again, but it was fun.”

Dokkaebi agrees. “Yeah, I’ve already found twenty new recipes I wanna try out. No dog food, though.”

“If they give you the win, I’ll strip for you”, Bandit promises (threatens?) her. “They can’t. You probably made the best cookies, but you bet people will try to feed Ace the most disgusting shit if he lets you get away with that.”

“Do you mean yourself by ‘people’?”, she grins.

“By the way, were you actually trying to win?”, Twitch wants to know from Bandit, who gives her an enigmatic shrug.

“Well. I won’t win the competition I don’t think, but I’ve won something else.” He catches Ace’s gaze across the room and winks at him, earning no discernible reaction. Though Twitch thinks she sees Ace’s cheeks darken a little. Then, something else occurs to her.

“Are you not worried, Maxim?”

The Russian frowns at her question. “Of course not. With Grace disqualified, I’m going to win.”

“But aren’t you worried about the implications?” He’s still not understanding. “You’re known as a fearless hunter. You crush cans with your forehead and open bottles with your eye socket. You have a reputation, you know. Don’t you think being crowned best amateur baker in Rainbow because of your delicate decorations will… undermine that? A little?”

Finally, realisation sets in and Kapkan’s eyes widen. “Oh. Oh no.”

Just then, Maestro and Ace step back into the limelight, carrying a trophy and trying their best to look professional. “It was a difficult decision and I’d like to preface this by saying you’ve all done really well, except for Grace, who can go eat a dick.”

“Fuck off!”, Dokkaebi yells back, chipper. Nobody is paying much attention to an increasingly frantic Kapkan.

“But now we can crown the first victor of the Great Rainbow Bake Off! And the winner is -”

“No! Don’t say it!”

“- Maxim!”

“No!”

“Come over here and accept your trophy.”

Sledge manages to grab the man before he can escape and together with Maestro, they wrestle him in front of the camera, ignoring his cries for help and attempts to break free – Dokkaebi shoves the small trophy into Kapkan’s hands while Echo snaps a few pictures, just in case, and Twitch is somehow not at all surprised this ended in chaos.

To ensure at least their audience experiences a satisfying conclusion, she pulls Mozzie off to the side and smiles into the camera. “I suppose that’s it, thank you all for joining us, it’s been a joy to -”

“Actually, can you stand over here?” Mozzie is focused on something in the distance, motioning for her to step a little to the right and gives her a thumbs up once he’s happy with her position.

“Uh, like I said, it’s been great and I hope we can do this again sometime.” Mozzie is still not looking at her. Without turning, she asks: “Let me guess, Dom and Håvard are making out behind me?”

The cheeky grin is all she needs to know.

“Sounds like a few Christmas miracles happened today. Happy holidays everyone, bye!” And as she waves, Mute lets her know he’s cut the livestream.

That’s it then, the event is over. And as Twitch surveys the room, all the bright smiles and easy laughs, the people trickling in from the next room eager to deliver supportive messages to their favourite participant, hands grabbing cookies and breaking them in half to share them, she affirms that yes. Yes, she’d love to do this again.

#rainbow six siege #fanfic #great rainbow bake off #grbo #kac #twitch #ace #maestro #sledge #kapkan #bandit #dokkaebi #bandit/ace #this took SO LONG to write now I'm really behind ahhh #maestro really rubbed off on sledge #AND JESUS WEPT

[monocub]

happy belated birthday ace !! they let him be their captain for the day :)

#one piece #one piece fanart #one piece fan art #op #monkey d. luffy #straw hat luffy #portgas d ace #fire fist ace #revolutionary sabo #sabo the revolutionary #flame emperor sabo #dadan #curly dadan #asl brothers #asl trio #op art #my art #monocuboodles #you cant tell me these gremlins wouldnt have stolen things from the mountain bandits #they are pirates after all #ace you are so loved hehe #happy birthday ace #the first drawing of the year and its asl #and my brainrot is still going strong LETS GOOOO

[greyskyflowers]

The idea of Ace and Luffy being wild, feral things makes my own heart happy.

Honestly though, I picture them having a lot in common with animals.

Strong teeth, strong bones, tough skin, quick reflexes. The instincts that come from growing up wild.

An ability eat lot of things that other people maybe wouldn't or can't. Meat that's a little more rare than advisable and snapping bones to get to the marrow inside.

They walk quiet, soundless when they want to be, using shadows and blind spots to become basically invisible. They don't do it often because they both have terrible attention spans but they can sit still and silent for long periods of time if needed, waiting like predators for their prey.

Staring, the way animals stare and wait for the other one to back down, making themselves look bigger and baring teeth. They snarl and snap their teeth, flexing their hands like claws when they're not making fists, a low grumble in their chests that sounds like a odd growl.

How it's instinct to cover the throat and belly of themselves and their crews, vulnerable spots that must be protected.

Ace being one of the shorter of the Whitebeard crew, so he does that thing where he eases himself in front of the others to cover their throats and bellies. Curling his lip back to show teeth and keeping eye contact with anyone stupid enough to try.

Licking their wounds, literally.

I imagine them being incredible trackers, able to use their senses a little more than the average person. Ears a little sharper, scents being considered, eyes taking in all the little details. Maybe they're not aware of it, but I like to think they take it all in deeper than they possibly realize.

A sense for something wrong, like how some animals can pick up on the energy people give off, possible sicknesses, coming storms, being watched, etc.

Sleeping all tangled together, the way animals sleep together for safety and warmth in cooler times. Luffy and Ace are big cuddlers.

Not necessarily in the normal cuddle ways either, they like to either be sprawled out on top or covered by someone. They're either being protected or they're protecting.

Head butts and cheek rubs when happy. That extra emphasis on crew, like packs and herds. Crew.

A lot of touching. Playing with someone's hair or nuzzling into their neck or side, a lack of boundaries because animals don't have shame or concerns like that.

And everyone who regularly interacts with Ace or Luffy wants to know how two feral cats got trapped in human bodies.

Am I always down for poly crews? Yes

Platonic or otherwise? Yes

Do I think everyone is a little in love with Luffy? Yes

Do I think everyone is a little in love with Ace? Yes

The crews love their wild ones and spoil them rotten when they can and know how to.

And since this is already AU let's just roll with it.

♠️ Ace ♠️

Ace just despises Teach right off the bat. As soon as the ink has settled in his skin and he's got a claim on him that he's never had before, he's completely standoffish with Teach. No matter how much the others tell him that's his brother now and assure him, he's all teeth and fire when Teach is around.

The man makes the fine hairs on the back of his neck rise and the instincts pacing at the back of his mind spit out a hiss.

Threatthreatthreat

His teeth grind together in anger, muscles tense under his skin, and it's a vicious thing in his chest he hasn't felt so strongly since Sabo and Luffy were his.

It causes some tension. People torn between supporting Teach, who's been their own for awhile, or supporting Ace, who has a good sense for this type of thing and is so welcoming to everyone else. They don't know how Ace can be so sweet and well loved by everyone but does a complete 180 with Teach.

It's instincts that have gotten Ace this far in life though and one night, it's only those instinct that save Thatch.

Ace darting out of the shadows and landing like the wrath of a god in front of Thatch, the knife that would have gone into the man's back instead finds a home in Ace's shoulder.

A rumbling growl that gets louder and nastier as the seconds tick by, blood running down a bare chest before flames lick up a wound that only found flesh because letting it pass meant the possibility of it hitting someone else. Sharp teeth shining in the growing glow of the fire and the ends of his hair burning like the edge of paper.

The flames don't burn Thatch when the older turns around. His flames would never burn crew.

Thatch wraps an arm around his waist like he's going to pull him away, but it just stays there, heavy around him. Ace takes a moment to find comfort in the warm and very alive presence pressed up behind him, bigger than him and Thatch's own protective fury catching fire.

Marco is less restrained in his fury. As are most of the others when they rush to investigate. The only reasons it's not quick is because they want it to hurt.

Ace is a coiled threat the whole time, body tense but staying where he is because the original threat was to Thatch and he hasn't quite lowered his hackles from that yet. Still on his toes and ready to spring forward at a moments notice.

He gives a small warning growl to Marco when he gets close, who looks at him in both worry and fond exasperation.

The blood from the blade is black where it burned against his skin and the flesh is unmarked, but it doesn't stop everyone from fluttering nervously around him.

♠️

Ace is attractive, arguably pretty in a way most pirates aren't. Although this young generation is changing that quickly, have you seen some of these rookies?

He draws attention easily, everyone drawn in by his charming personality or freckled cheeks.

He's a flirt but he doesn't often let other people actually touch him. Leaning away from eager fingers or gracefully dodging arms, excusing himself when he feels to cornered. He doesn't want the feel of strangers on his skin, he just wants the crew. And Luffy of course, his heart giving a lonely pang for his brother.

Sometimes people don't get the hint though, and sometimes they do and they don't care.

Drugs don't effect Ace like they would someone who wasn't a devil fruit user but they still make him dizzy and weak before he burns through it.

It only takes once, outside a bar with someone's hands on his skin when they didn't belong there, on his lower stomach and the other up by his neck. He doesn't even get a chance to try to shake off the drug enough to do anything before the man is gone.

Familiar hands, Marco, running over his skin quick and firm like it could wipe away the foreign touch before he processed it was there. Like if he replaced the unknown touch with his own quick enough it will wipe away the lingering disgust and discomfort of the stranger.

The whole time he keeps Ace hidden between his larger body and the wall behind them. Ace's heart aches almost as much as his head with how thoughtful it was. How safe and grounding it was.

The only arms he lets grab him, the only hands that he presses in to, are crew.

♠️

Ace has a habit of sneaking into everyone's bed, they don't talk about how they all know it's on the nights where he can't sleep or has nightmares. He burrows between them and the mattress, until he's under them enough to feel covered, safe and protected.

Ace isn't a small guy but he's lean, always had a hard time bulking up with his metabolism being so high and his natural build. He feels small with them, especially the commanders like Jozu and Vista who completely cover him. Even Thatch and Marco are decently larger than him though, Izo and Haruta being the exceptions but they're large in everything that they are.

They all welcome him. He's warm and sweet, plus it's nice to know he's sleeping somewhere safe instead of falling asleep in strange places through the day.

Marco is usually his favorite though because he doesn't pretend to be asleep. He just props himself up enough so Ace can wiggle under him before settling back down, his chest to Ace's back.

Some nights when the pressure is too much and he's restless in a way that feels like it's deep in his bones, he paces the ship. He's coiled and tight, usually not sleeping for a few days before it catches up to him and he slinks away somewhere dark and hidden to finally rest.

Usually one of the other commanders can coax him into resting, all of them getting the hang of how to best help their wild, little one.

♠️

The crew getting used to Ace just crawling into their laps and making himself at home. He is also fond of appearing just long enough to rub his face into someone's neck or against their cheek before taking off again.

♠️

Ace sneaking off to literally lick his wounds in peace when he gets hurt, especially when he was still finding his place. Someone always having to go track him down because he stays curled away like an injured animal until he feels better if they don't.

Licking at his arm one time when he manages to get caught with seastone, blood staining his teeth and tongue rust colored. Marco trying to grab him and in full lecture mode as Ace tries to dig out the lingering seastone with his teeth.

♠️

An extra one to hurt just a little ♥️

Ace is wild. Already a problem before you factor in his devil fruit and raw power. He's got a reputation of biting, taking off fingers and catching throats between sharp teeth.

It seems like someone did their research though because the muzzle they wrangle him into has seastone. Everyone has finally caught on to the fact that he doesn't need his flames to bite.

It's a sharp, nasty thing. Probably thrown together quick in a desperate attempt to get him under control. The straps dig into his skin hard enough to draw blood and Ace can already picture Marco talking about infections.

It hurts and goes from a deep, dull discomfort to a sharp, active pain. The muzzle settles into his skin and rub the skin raw where it doesn't outright cut into it. He's been captured for a few days, the wounds clotting and trying to heal only to be ripped back open when moving a certain way.

It was only a matter of time until they came for him and when the guards start getting fidgety he wishes he could show his teeth in a grin. Everyone knows what happens to those stupid enough to mess with the Whitebeard pirates.

He always knew they'd find him, even when the guards whispered in his ear cruel taunts about being forgotten. Unloved.

His heart still goes heavy with affection when he hears the first sounds of death coming for his captors.

#one piece #portgas d. ace #luffy #marco the phoenix #whitebeard crew #marace #marcoace #izo one piece #haruta one piece #thatch one piece #diamond jozu #speed jiru #one piece vista #whitebeard pirates #ace x everyone tbh #*old lady voice* back in my day you got dropped off to be raised by some bandits and grew up wild as hell in a forest #op #setting sail with greyskyflowers

[dark-dimare]

Imagine seven year old Luffy seeing some baby animals (maybe wolves?) play-biting out of affection and deciding to do the same. So he goes up to Ace and just gently *nom*.

Ace is confused, cause what? He asks, and Luffy just says that he saw someone else do that to their siblings. Ace, not realizing that Luffy saw baby /animals/ play-bite their sibling, and runs with it. After all, Luffy has the most experience with kids their age between the two of them. (Sabo’ as experiences don’t count to them because “Nobles are weird”)

So the two (or three if it happens before Sabo’s accident) just start biting each other as a way of showing affection. No big deal, just average wild child stuff, only it continues once they’ve set out and gathered crew.

I imagine Ace ended up gathering the Spades in a similar manner to Luffy, one by one kind of way but no more than two at a time. By the time the next Spade joined, the previous one was not only accustomed to but joined in with affectionate biting. It wasn’t much, or often, but still present enough.

Ace doesn’t even realize that it’s not a normal thing until after he joins Whitebeard, when he affectionately bites Thatch for bringing him food. A whole shenanigan-esque scene happens where they try to explain to Ace that No, humans do not tend to bite each other in affection outside of lovers in intimate situations. Once it finally sinks in, all he can say is “Oh no, my brother’s poor crew.”

Luffy doesn’t hesitate to affectionately bite his nakama, and they just take it as part of him, just like how he’s rubber. It mainly becomes a thing when the other Straw Hats start doing it as well.

Zoro, I imagine, would be the first, and would first do it to Sanji. Like, he just woke up from a nap, and sees Sanji handing him a bottle of booze. So, as thanks, he instinctively gives Sanji a gentle nip on his wrist as he takes the bottle. Sanji is so shook he doesn’t even start a fight over it, and just numbly walks over to the girl(s). “You know how Luffy keeps biting us?” “Yeah, he’s like a damn mosquito, only he doesn’t draw blood.” “Zoro just bit me. Like how Luffy does.” “…What?”

From there, it spreads. Gentle nips as thanks, worried noms for those injured, soft bites as just general “I’m glad you’re here”. Every one of the Straw Hats bite each other. (I imagine Brook has a bone in particular that he lets them nom on because he’s so tall, and they don’t want to upset him by making him feel like a chew toy, and it just has various teeth marks simply because of how many times they’ve gently bit him. He’s very thankful for it, because on nights when he can’t sleep because he’s suddenly thrown mentally back into isolation, he can feel their marks on his bone and remember that he will never be alone as long as they live.)

The Whitebeards are thrown through a loop if/when they meet a small crew captained by their Second Division Commander’s precious baby brother, and finds that a l l of them have the same way of showing affection, and none of them brought up how weird it is.

(If Sabo was still around when Luffy came to this conclusion, I imagine it’d gotten stuck in Sabo’s instincts to nom with affection. Koala is the first -and only for a long time- person he bites, and she doesn’t question it because “maybe it’s an amnesia thing? Like him not even knowing his name?”, and doesn’t even bring it up. The others only find out once Hack gets bitten for delivering a tired and hungry Sabo a snack after training. “You know I’m not food, right?” “Yeah?” “So then why did you bite me?” “I bite Koala all the time?” “I thought it was an amnesia thing, is it not?” “No, it’s not even really a human thing, with some very age-specific exceptions.” “Huh. Normally, I just feel like biting, so I bite. Normally, it’s a ‘I’m glad you’re here’ or ‘hello/goodbye’ bite. That was a ‘thank you’.” “…all right.”)

#one piece #asl trio #portgas d ace #monkey d luffy #sabo #op whitebeard pirates #op straw hat pirates #straw hat pirates #Sabo is somehow more feral then the Revolutionaries thought #it started off with brothers #chewing on brothers #and now it’s evolved #the Spades chewed on each other #specifically because of Ace #who trusted Luffy #because he was raised by bandits in the mountains #Luffy literally saw baby animals chew on each other #and said Neat #inspired by my neurodivergent need to chew on things #and puppies #i temporarily had some and they would try to eat each other’s ears while playing #the one we kept still occasionally does it to his mama when they play #also technically inspired by dannyphantomexe #and his short video about neurodivergent affection #the straw hats are lucky no one’s shed blood yet #you know Luffy’s got a killer jaw strength #and Zoro literally holds and uses an entire sword in his mouth #he’s got jaw strength for days #then there’s Franky #who’s entire skull is practically mecha at this point

[therealslimshady]

Luffy's life pre-bandits is insane to me. Here's the timeline as we currently have it:

Luffy's born, leaves his dad early enough he has absolutely no memories of him

Luffy gets raised(?) by garp, some highlights including getting tossed in a ravine, getting attached to balloons and floating away, and getting left in the jungle for an undisclosed amount of time

Luffy turns six

Luffy meets shanks yayyyy

Shanks stays on or near the island for about a year, and one can only assume that Garp is off island during this time given he can get away with it

If garp's off island where the hell is luffy living

Is he homeless??

did garp toss him on the island and tell him to have fun??

The whole luffy almost gets murdered by bandits situation happens

garp takes luffy into the jungle to get raised by bandits

Absolutely insane. No wonder Luffy is like this

#and this is not even getting into the being raised by bandits thing #Or Luffy telling ace that being alone is the worst thing ever #One piece #monkey d. luffy #monkey d garp #Shanks #red hair shanks

[everywebkin]

Can you do my buddy my friend my everything, the raccoon?

(One of the first ones I ever got, I named her Wanda :})

brilliant bandit, released september 2011

link to regular raccoon

#hope u dont mind i used your ask to post the ace raccoon :) #i checked your profile and saw the ace flag! so since i already drew the regular raccoon i thought it would be appropriate #brilliant bandit #webkinz brilliant bandit #Procyonid #raccoon #webkinz art #traditional art #webkinz #virtual pet #webcore #ace pride #asexual pride #pride month #2011

[moonelnone]

(flea anon i shall be jumping in sometimes bc im rotating ur art in my brain)

my narcolepsy leads me to having hallucinations and its always horrifying shit so do you think ace also gets those maybe imagining sabo and coupled with the inteusive thoughts he just is having Terrible time (hes just like me fr,,,,,)

Im glad you're rotating my art, it's loves to be rotated 🙏 Ace would definitely have hallucinations, maybe groggily waking up at night in the tree house to see Sabo at the door way, but when he does a double take it's just a tree branch that accidentally got caught in the open entrance.... And yeah, alongside intrusive thoughts he'd just be having a bad time even if Luffy is there because the thoughts are harmless, wanting to hurt him would occasionally occur. Maybe to add on the pile of reason why he reached out to Makino to help him be a better brother and learn to be kinder Also sorry about the Narcolepsy anon, fight through those hallucinations well 👊 😔

#tokumei answered #I wanna... talk about Sabo's intrusive thoughts too hm hm..... #but I dont really know how to word it out like- It was Ace and Sabo. Two children with emotionally pent up rage that their ideal #way of spending time is fighting stealing and crime. Because it was their way of feeling free to do whatever they want #Ace being raised by bandits and learning through their actions. and Sabo with his shitty ass family building pent up rage in him #Ace got to mature and learn mostly to stay away from intrusive thoughts caused by his emotional instability and Sabo... Well- he did #mature too. But y'know he grew up fighting in the revolutionaries #his intrusive thoughts may have been enabled but be directed at the government and rich asshole (or anyone he doesn't like) #so we got one brother who learned to suppress those intrusive thoughts (Ace) and one brother who got those thoughts be enabled (Sabo) #I think you should note that in the jp dub Sabo is kind of a meanie sometimes when he's not talking to Luffy

[smokedetected]

R6S Duolingo and language learning HCs

Stupid fluff/crack hcs for some of the r6s operators, inspired by a recent heated discussion in our research group about everyone’s Duolingo habits (lol).

Warnings/notes: none (unless you’re severely traumatized by the Duolingo owl, though if that’s the case, it’s probably already too late anyways) Slight romance and/or suggestiveness in some.

Sorted alphabetically under the cut—I wrote for everyone that popped into my mind at the time.

Ace: Will totally take the initial placement test for Norwegian, just for that cheap and easy XP-boost that will catapult him to the top of the leaderboard and allow him to flex his high score in front of the others. (Everyone knows what’s going on, but let’s let him have this.) Will be extra motivated should you decide to get the app as well and absolutely swoon over you should you decide to take up Norwegian (he still won’t take it well should you outcompete him on the leaderboard, though, so keep that in mind).

Bandit: Doesn’t really care for the app per se, but is more than happy to help expand your knowledge of German swear words and street slang should you decide to take it up, whether you want it or not. If you’re serious about learning the language, he will do his best to help you in earnest and make an effort to include you in the German banter between the GSG9 member (be careful, though, as he will absolutely take the opportunity to feed you wrong and/or offensive words every now and then so he can have a laugh when you cheerfully insult any of the other German operators, thinking you were merely throwing out some German slang). Will be more encouraged than ever to give you German pet names. He would also take the opportunity to introduce you to his favorite German bands and songs (just stay wary of the meaning of some of the lyrics you will inevitably pick up).

Blitz: This is his home turf—Elias doesn’t need to be convinced to download the app, he already has it (and every other language learning app out there) ready to go on his phone. He finds the questions and problems in Duolingo too easy to really challenge him, but he’ll use it to refresh his memory on grammar and vocabulary during breaks or look into the more exotic languages they offer just for fun. Gets very excited if you are interested in languages, too, and all the more so if the language you want to learn happens to be German! He will send you all kinds of materials and resources to help you study, from news articles to memes. When he sees you practicing using the app, he will come up to you and give you a kiss whenever you get an exercise right.

Doc: Gustave always encourages the people around him to try new things and stay flexible, physically and mentally, so he welcomes it when you introduce him to the app. Other operators might complain about the persistent reminders sent by the app, but Doc actually appreciates them—without them, he would quickly forget about the app again as he’s always caught up with work late into the night. Should you decide to learn French, he will gladly practice with you whenever you have a moment of time throughout the day, remaining patient and encouraging even as you torment him with the exhilarating questions about his name and profession that come with the early stages of learning a new language.

Dokkaebi: Will get super competitive and try to get as many of the other Rainbow members as possible into Duolingo as well. They don’t all have to learn the same language, but there will be an internal competition about who earns the most points every week. Will probably act casually about it, but then log into the app again at the last minute before the leaderboard closes, while her fellow operators are either already asleep or focused on something else and absolutely obliterate them and their scores. If you tell her that you want to learn Korean, she might be a bit surprised at first, but will quickly find it endearing when it becomes apparent that you’re serious about it. She loves it when you text her in Korean whenever you learned something new and will in turn send you Korean proverbs and other tidbits you might fight interesting.

Glaz: Not a huge fan of the app (maybe because he doesn’t think the interface is visually appealing?). Would maybe use it to gain a basic understanding of the language of a country he’s sent to on a mission + any themed lessons that catch his eye. If your native language isn’t English or Russian, he would use the app to check out the basics while he’s away from you, though he would much rather get the explanations directly from you. If you inform him that you’re trying to learn Russian, his heart will melt and he will shower you with sweet words of praise and encouragement to make you feel comfortable enough to speak to him in his native language. Will also buy you a premium subscription when you aren’t looking to make learning even more fun for you.

IQ: Monika is smart and a quick learner - you know it, I know it, it’s literally implied in her codename. Quickly uninstalls the app again because she finds the exercises too easy and doesn’t want to bother wasting time on having to unlock the few lessons she’d actually be interested in. If you or another operator were the ones getting her into the app, however, she’d keep it around just so she can keep doing the weekly challenges with you—she finds it cute when you get all competitive about it and it makes her happy that you want to participate in them with her. Her first reaction to you telling her that you want to learn German would be a blunt “Why?,” as she thinks you might get more use out of other languages. Tell her that you’re doing it for her and she becomes incredibly flustered (all the more so should you decide to call her by one or more German pet name(s)), yet happy at the same time.

Jäger: Marius quickly incorporated the app into his daily routine, usually getting his daily session in during breakfast or dinner. Will regularly remind his GSG9 colleagues to use the app by sharing his milestones to their group chat (*screenshot of perfect 2-week-streak* “Und bei euch so? 😏” (”what about you guys? 😏”) Will be very giddy should you decide to learn German—he’s very eager to practice with you and will constantly point out how certain things are called in German as well as give you additional info and expressions. He’ll probably get ahead of himself and it will be nearly impossible to remember everything he’s telling you, but he doesn’t expect you to and is glad to repeat it.

Kapkan: Hates it. Thinks the interface looks stupid, the sample conversations pointless, and was just about ready to ask Sledge to borrow his hammer to smash his phone and computer because he accidentally consented to receive all the reminders and push notifications and it’s driving him insane. If you’re using the app to learn a language and feel like its helping you, however, he is willing to put up with the eye sore that is the Duolingo owl and the noise pollution coming from the app, just for you (particularly if the language you are trying to learn is Russian—his adoration for your efforts outweighs any negative feelings he may have). If your native language is something different from Russian or English, he would make an effort to learn at least the basics in it when things start to get serious. While he’s a diligent student, he becomes surprisingly shy and easily flustered when attempting to speak to you in your native language, so stay patient and give him lots of encouragement.

Montagne: As his perceived lack of proficiency in foreign languages when compared to some of the other Rainbow operators is something that’s been bothering him on and off for some time, he was very happy and receptive when you introduced him to the app. He uses it to quietly practice by himself during moments of downtime as he goes about his day. I feel like he’d be the type of person to have a 500+ day streak that makes you go “damn! :0″ when you see it on their profile for the first time. Is over the moon when you reveal to him that you’ve been trying to learn some French for him and have nothing but praise for even your most awkward attempts at speaking to him in French. Naturally, he will want to repay the favor and take up your language in return, but it will take some verbal encouragement from you before he overcomes his shyness to actually talk to you in your native language.

Mute: would never resort to cheap exploits like raking in a massive number of points by acing the placement test in his native language (as others are rumored to have done), but would quickly figure out the little tricks, bonuses, and power-ups that allow him to continuously earn the highest score possible while learning. Finds the exercises too easy and doesn’t like how you have to unlock certain topics through progression, rather than being able to freely choose what you’re interested in learning right from the beginning. If your native language isn’t English, he will look for other better resources on it on his own. Even if English isn’t your first language, he doesn’t really see any concrete need for you to improve but will respect your desire to do so by providing you with recommendations for English books and movies, as well as the offer of discussing them with him once you’re done with them.

Smoke: While the gamification aspect does hold some appeal in his eyes, he doesn’t really feel the need to follow the path given by the app—he’s convinced that if you want to learn a new language, it should ideally come naturally to you by actively engaging with source materials in it (read: chemical safety data sheets, scientific papers, and online shitposts). Should his daughter discover her love for Duolingo-based language learning, however, you bet he would download and use the app, if only to keep her happy and connect with her (he would, however, be equally happy if you were to compete with her in the challenges in his stead—in fact, he would only adore you more for doing so). If your native language isn’t English, the first thing he would ask you to teach him are swearwords, if nothing else, so he can annoy his fellow operators even more effectively. If things get serious between the two of you, however, he will be more than eager to learn other things as well from you.

Tachanka: Would use the app to learn a few bits in your language as an icebreaker and to surprise you & show you how much he cares about you. Flirty and straightforward as he is, he would then quickly graduate to asking you for some one-on-one conversation training sessions, offering to teach you basic Russian (or flirting/swearwords, depending on how you roll). Should you decide to learn Russian, he will be all over you whenever you use your newly acquired, meager language skills on him — he will be incredibly happy and proud of you. In fact, he might get a little too excited and unintentionally embarrass you a little by boasting about your “skills” to his fellow Spetsnaz members, putting you on the spot when they subsequently demand a first-hand demonstration. He’s quick to pick up on the naughtiest, most suggestive expressions in your native language and will make good use of them behind closed doors with absolutely zero shame, causing your blood to flow to your face (as well as other places) whenever he does so.

Thatcher: Was most definitely pressured into getting the app by someone else on his team and only begrudgingly agreed to use it under the condition that that person would also set everything up for him. He will quickly get annoyed by it and delete it after Duo keeps counting typos he didn’t bother to correct as mistakes, subsequently providing you with ample opportunity to expand your vocabulary of British swearing. If English isn’t your native language, he would try to learn some phrases from your first language for you. He’s very serious about it and somehow selects rather lyrical source materials for this endeavor—on occasion he sounds like an old-timey gentleman plucked straight from a romance novel, causing a blush to appear on your cheeks every time he talks to you like that.

Thermite: Another one who would probably see Duolingo as a kind of dating app with extra steps. Would repeatedly come to you under the pretense of asking you how certain features of the app work, etc., just so he has an excuse to stay close to you. If you’re in an established relationship, he will ask you for a kiss for every exercise he gets right whenever he’s actually using it to practice. Will make an effort to remember the most random sample phrases to repeat them back to his fellow operators in their native language and think he’s hilarious for doing so. If you’re the type of person that gets discouraged whenever you accidentally miss a day, causing your streak to break (the type of person he is), he will briefly log into your account and do a quick and easy exercise just to keep your streak going when he sees you haven’t logged into the app after you’ve already gone to bed. Will also really work with the random, basic phrases he’s learned in your language so far to impress you or at least make you laugh.

___________

thank you for reading! <3  these were very fun to do! If you are missing a specific operator, I didn’t spontaneously have a scenario of them pop into my mind, but you are free to request them.

Next post (in a few days) will be less shitpost-y (I hope, lol)~!

#r6s #rainbow 6 siege #rainbow six siege #rainbow 6 #rainbow 6 hcs #rainbow 6 x reader #rainbow 6 headcanons #r6s ace #r6s bandit #r6s blitz #r6s doc #r6s dokkaebi #r6s glaz #r6s iq #r6s jäger #r6s jager #r6s kapkan #r6s montagne #r6s mute #r6s smoke #r6s tachanka #r6s thatcher #r6s thermite

[ohmyfairies]

I firmly believe in genderqueer!Ace solely because there is no way this feral jungle child understands gender in any way but women are in charge (Dadan and Makino) and men are awful (Garp, Sabo’s dad, Ace’s dad and Bluejam)

#he was raised in a jungle by bandits #for a given value of ‘rasied’ they fed him until he was like 8 and that was it #did Dadan love him?? yes of course #was she in any way a competent parent?? hhahahaahaaaa fuck no #yeah I firmly believe he had the weirdest idea of gender until he met sabo #and given sabo was raised with strict gender roles it just made ace even weirder #ace comes off as really normal compared to Luffy until you realise Luffy was raised by makino and is just dumb #and ace was raised by tigers and bandits but is very smart #key watches anime #one piece #portgas d ace

[kiruuuuu]

Siegemas 2022, Day 7🌟

and also: Kiru's Advent Calendar, Day 25🎅

Hiya all, the last day of my advent calendar is also my contribution to @dualrainbow's annual Siegemas event - make sure you follow them so you don't miss anything!! Thank you so much to all the participants as well as the tireless mods 💖 My prompt was: 'Sitting by the fire ⎯ “This is nice, being here with you.”' and, as is tradition, features Bandit/Ace. This time, it's a meet-cute! (Rating M/E, all the best things: emotional hurt/comfort, fluff, kinda explicit, ~8.9k words)

.

Ace is fired exactly two weeks before Christmas.

Not his own fault, nobody ever raised concerns about his work ethic, competence or interpersonal skills, but times are tough and the economy not what it once was… and he loses interest halfway through the buzzword-laden speech coming from a faceless man in a suit with whom he’s never interacted before while his boss avoids all eye contact and squirms in his seat when Ace takes to simply staring at him, impassive.

He knows why he’s being let go and his boss knows he knows. Politics, he’d probably call it, and Ace: nepotism. It was obvious his structured approach did not sit well with his supervisor, just as obvious as his favouritism towards one of Ace’s previous colleagues, the same person who’s going to be promoted into his job.

It’s odd, he’d have expected it to feel much worse, for his stomach to drop or his chest to constrict, yet instead he’s overcome with a relief that worries him in its intensity. He’s free, that’s what it feels like to him, finally free of this soul-sucking, spirit-crushing place. Before, he feared having to work through Christmas Eve, of not being able to allocate any time for his family or even just himself during the holidays.

Now? Now he’s got more than enough time for everything he never planned, for all the things he’s been wanting to do without allowing himself to think it. There’s no guilt over postponed projects anymore. He can just go and do them.

Once he’s back home, the reality of what happened sets in and effortlessly quashes all positivity and hope he developed as a defensive mechanism, for the alternative would’ve been crushing despair which isn’t particularly constructive. His dismissal did not come out of nowhere, he can’t claim it did, and yet nobody around him thought a step this drastic was even an option. What he’s left with is a tired numbness, as if he slept too long or spent too much time in the presence of someone he doesn’t like: he’s drained, empty, devoid of all motivation to concern himself with his own future. Sure, he got a severance package – they wouldn’t have dared otherwise – but he’s going to have to apply to other places now, new soul-sucking, spirit-crushing companies who play the same games with the same kind of people who favour questionably competent yes-men.

Ace stands in the middle of his small apartment, in the middle of the huge complex, in the middle of a large city, and wonders what it would’ve been like if he’d stayed home.

He knows the answer to that one. His parents are wonderful, he adores his family, but he would’ve suffocated in the little town with uncertain future.

Is this better? Being spread so thin he barely feels human anymore? He’s not sure. At least here, the restaurants have vegetarian options, he can watch plays if he wants to, he doesn’t need a car. All his younger siblings flew the coop, earlier than even he did, so either he set a precedent and they all curse him for promising something their new homes can’t deliver, or it’s simply not possible for ambitious, curious young people to sit still.

He misses travelling. He wonders whether he should book a last-minute flight sometime the next days.

They actually fired me, he types to Bastien. You got some time to talk?

A cry for help. It doesn’t feel particularly good to beg for attention, at least not this kind – in groups, Ace easily draws the focus, makes it seem natural, centres everyone on himself and makes them think it was their idea. Hardly anyone can resist him in person if he aims for it and yet, tragically, the one man who’s capable of escaping his charm is the very one for whom his heart yearns. It’s been so long the overwhelming pull has faded to a dull pulse, his thoughts freed of the endless spirals into which they were forced when the infatuation was freshest, and still he finds himself crawling by his feet, asking for bits of scrap, a kind word, a text back.

No response. Not yet, he’s probably at work himself, Ace might have to wait for the lunch break.

The whole affair this morning left an unpleasant taste in his mouth and sticks to him like grime, prompting him to toss his clothes aside in the bathroom for a shower but a glance into the mirror stops him. The person looking back at him is a ghost, empty eyes, face devoid of any expression. Right then, he can’t remember the last time he laughed.

Before he steps into the shower, he compulsively checks his phone but as expected, Bastien hasn’t messaged him back, hasn’t even opened the chat.

God, he’s desperate.

After he’s allowed the lukewarm water to drum on his scalp for a while without moving, he hears the doorbell go off. Frowning, he turns the water off and listens for a second or two, then hears it again, a muffled bzzt next door, not his own – the walls are thin enough that he’s watched several films along with his neighbours without wanting to, let alone witnessed all kinds of other activities. The water returns and he grabs the expensive shower gel, the one bit of luxury he allows himself, ignoring the evermore insistent buzzing from one flat over.

Except it doesn’t stop. And right as he starts rinsing himself off, the arrhythmic noise turns into one obnoxious, continuous buzz that is apparently going to go on forever. He’s already irritated and this takes the cake; infuriated, he snatches the nearest towel, doesn’t bother drying himself and instead wraps it around his hips as he stomps to the apartment door, yanks it open and steps out. “Mate”, he calls angrily, “she’s not fucking home!”

The curse slipped out before he’s processed the sight before him, and in retrospect, he feels a tad guilty. A massive, misshapen package blocks most of the narrow hallway but the source of the unending buzzing is a man, clad in the team colours of whichever delivery company he belongs to, leaning his forehead against the wall and pressing on the doorbell with his body. When he finally straightens up and interrupts the horrible soundscape, Ace notices the courier looks about as tired as he himself feels.

Wordlessly, the two of them stare at each other, him dripping all over his welcome mat, the bloke clearly trying to assess the situation and decide what to do.

“Can I -”, he starts, just as Ace says: “I should -”

They fall silent again, this time with an air of amusement that illustrates the ridiculousness of the scene. Instead of awkward, it’s funny somehow and so there’s a bit of cheek in the delivery man’s voice when he asks: “Could I leave this package with you, once you’ve put some clothes on?”

“Yeah”, Ace agrees and almost grins when he catches wandering eyes. You’re not subtle, my dude, he mentally admonishes the stranger, not suppressing the pang of pride he feels when his toned chest seems to draw this gaze like a magnet. “Both of that sounds like a good idea. I’ll be right back.”

He leaves the door open, which he normally wouldn’t, but the obvious interest he’s spotted makes him cocky. The bathroom door he shuts, just in case, and quickly towels himself dry before throwing on a t-shirt that might be a little too tight and his favourite sweatpants. Grey, of course; if there’s an opportunity to show off a little more, he’ll gladly take it.

When he re-emerges, the delivery guy (and Ace takes a moment to peer at his name tag: Dom, apparently, which somehow makes this even funnier) has pushed the bulky box in front of his apartment door and again checks him out. The attention leaves his skin prickling in a good kind, like a heartfelt compliment by a stranger. Which he supposes this is, essentially.

“We’ll have to tilt it”, Dom drags him back to the here and now, indicating the package taller than him. Taller than the door, in fact, its base wider than the top and if Ace didn’t know any better, he’d assume his neighbour ordered a two-and-a-half metre penis sculpture. It’s very big. Carefully, they slide it further into the corridor and lean it forwards, only to realise it won’t fit like this either.

“Sideways?”, Ace suggests and while they manage to get the top third into his flat this way, it catches an edge and refuses to move any further. “Whatever piece of furniture they ordered, it’s not gonna fit in their flat anyway. What is this, a bloody fence?”

Dom, originally treating the package entrusted to him with the utmost care, stops worrying about its integrity somewhere between the third and their eighth attempt of shoving it into Ace’s apartment, eventually kicking it to get it to the right position, and he might’ve given up earlier if Ace hadn’t found it so goddamn funny.

“Maybe we need some lube, ease the slide”, he wheezes and gets a rare grin in return. He had the choice of letting frustration take over, of allowing all the negativity stored up erupt and pour out, engulfing this package representing consumer culture in its purest form and possibly also washing up against poor Dom who deserves none of it, or deciding the whole scene is hilarious enough to run out of air laughing. He went with the latter option and is loving every second.

“Last attempt”, Dom announces, visibly done with this stupid misshapen box, and suddenly, after they’ve tipped it over completely and laid it on its side, they manage to push it all the way in. Probably not a good sign.

Ace looks at the large bottom of the package now blocking most of his apartment door and frowns in disapproval. “Let me just check something.” And just for the hell of it, he climbs over after it turns out that shimmying alongside is not an option, and finds his suspicion verified once he’s inside. “I mean… I’ve always wanted another wall that blocks entry to all the other rooms.”

Dom snorts and crosses his arms on top of the box, rests his chin on them and takes a moment to just breathe. “Man, it’s all the way in there, isn’t it.”

“Yeah. I could cuddle with it at night if I wanted to.” Ace indicates the open door to his bedroom which has also been invaded by cardboard. Both of them silently drink in the comically large object taking up most of the space in the flat, savouring the ridiculousness of it all. “As much as I’m in favour of avant-garde decorations, I don’t think this is it.”

The other man nods solemnly. “Yep. And you know what just occurred to me? If it’s this difficult to get this monster anywhere, there’s no way anyone would steal it. We’ll just put it back and your neighbour can deal with it when they come home.”

Ace huffs in amusement. “Can you just do that?”

“Oh absolutely not, I’d get fired if they found out. But I’m already like thirteen deliveries behind and stopped giving a shit. You ready to play Tetris again?”

His disregard for rules hits Ace straight in his suddenly rebellious mood and so he agrees eagerly. Together, they turn the blasted thing on its side about five times before they accept they’ll just have to go ahead and pray, and it’s an added bonus that he can watch the muscles in Dom’s tattooed arms stand out as he does most of the heavy lifting. He’s easy on the eyes overall, a rugged charm to which Ace is weak, allowing him to forget this morning’s events completely.

It takes them a laughable amount of time to get the package back to where it was before and only a small part is owed to Ace actively sabotaging the manoeuvring because it’s both amusing and also so he can spend some more time in Dom’s presence. They end up panting, exhausted, and smiling at each other.

“Thanks for the help.” Dom himself must realise he sounds like he’s about to shake Ace’s hand in a totally straight way, so he adds a cheeky: “Never enjoyed getting my package stuck more than today.”

Ace can’t help it, he bursts out into laughter at the corny remark and decides then and there that they’re not done with each other just yet. He motions towards his own door. “Want a coffee? That’s all I can offer you though.”

The understanding nod makes it obvious Dom gets the implication. “Sure. I’m already late, might as well take a break after that ordeal.”

.

A little while later, they’re seated in Ace’s tiny kitchen, warming their hands on nondescript mugs as they speculate about the contents of the mystery box. Dom is surprisingly good company, easygoing and witty, just the right kind of flirty without being overbearing. Ace has no lack of suitors yet he rarely entertains them: his heart is somewhere else and therefore his mind, and purely physical pleasure doesn’t manage to scratch the itch. Plus it usually leaves him emptier than before, dissatisfied with himself, wondering whether it really was worth it.

But Dom? He just seems fun to be around. And oddly enough, he doesn’t look out of place in Ace’s flat.

“Aren’t you worried about your job?”, Ace eventually asks, sipping on his cappuccino.

“I would, if it was decent.” Dom’s shrug is heartening, like an affirmation: it’s fine to switch off emotionally if your work treats you badly. He might have exactly the things to say Ace needs to hear right now. “Only been doing this for a few months and if I’m honest, I’m close to quitting anyway. For a while, it was fun, most customers are nice and it’s interesting to get a glimpse into how different kinds of people live, but the conditions are pretty bad. And now, with Christmas coming up, everyone just seems stressed.”

Yeah, Ace can attest to that. Whenever he goes shopping, he’s surrounded by a sea of harried faces, crying children, overwhelmed parents. It’s almost a relief he won’t have to buy any presents last-minute, if only it didn’t mean he won’t get to see his family for the third Christmas in a row.

“What do you do?”

He pulls a face. “Nothing. I was let go today.”

“Oh shit. How’s that for a Christmas present. You got something else lined up?”

There’s something reassuring about Dom’s response, with how much he takes it for granted that people lose their jobs and find something else, switch careers. It’s not the end of the world, it’s no sign of personal failure, it doesn’t devalue him to be fired. He just has to dust himself off and keep going. “Not yet. But I’ve got some money saved up, so there’s no rush.”

“Nice. Take your time then and choose carefully, or you’ll end up like me.” A good-natured grin. “Hopping from shitshow to shitshow.”

“That bad?”

“You know, it’s fine. Not the jobs, they’re all garbage fires, but it’s never boring. I just need something to pay the bills and I’m good.”

Ace tilts his head and scrutinises the man before him, the soft-edged motifs on his arms indicating they’re at least a decade old, the multitude of piercings in his ear, the well-built physique. He must work out to look like that, and the quiet determination in his eyes speaks of discipline. “You sure there’s nothing you really want to do?”

The hesitation betrays him. He looks down at his black coffee, swirls it around and takes a sip before he shrugs again. “I guess. I’ve been good with electronics, I like tinkering. Would be nice to do it for a living.”

“Have you tried?”

More silence. Ace appreciates he’s not fed any platitudes, empty phrases to distract from the topic, instead Dom seems to mull over his words in earnest. “I probably should”, he admits after more seconds have passed. “How about you? Any dreams left unfulfilled?”

Oh. Maybe he shouldn’t have prodded, not when he himself is guilty of the same sin. “Always wanted to be an EMT. Never had the balls to go for it.”

“No time like the present.” Dom grins at him, a magnetic, bewitching kinda thing. “How about we make a promise? We both vow to send out some applications this year, just to see whether it’d go anywhere. No harm in applying, right?”

Ace considers the proposal. He could lie and agree in the hopes of improving a stranger’s life while continuing down the coward’s path and keep working in the same field just because it’s safe and he knows what to expect. He could also just flat out refuse. But somehow, in that moment, he finds it easier to make an agreement with this random delivery man than talk about his dreams with his family and friends. They’ve been supportive, never pushy, and yet he found it impossible to disclose his deepest desires to them, nigh impossible to admit he’s been going down the wrong path for most of his life now. Dom simply cannot judge him, knows nothing of his story, merely tickled his actual dream job out of him and now offers the vaguest support. And it’s enough. Somehow, it ends up being enough.

“Yeah. Alright.” He nods more emphatically the more he thinks about it, already formulating paragraphs in his head, working out a timeline of when to apply and where. “Yeah. Let’s promise. No harm in applying.”

And Dom beams. “It’s a deal then.”

It is.

.

They drag it out, neither of them ready to admit that Dom should’ve left half an hour ago, but it’s obvious they’re enjoying each other’s company. Ace provides him with some toast and another coffee, discussing their living situations, their love life (and Dom really toes the line between socially acceptable and too forward here), anything and everything. It turns out he’s been single and not looking for a while now, deeming relationships too much of a hassle (though there’s some bitterness there with which Ace very much sympathises), Ace in turn mentions the woes of falling for the straight best friend to which Dom grimaces a little too sincerely (they’ve all been there, every single one of them), and the longer Ace interacts him with, the more he considers just dragging him to bed. He looks like he could hold him down with no trouble, jokes around like someone who’s an expert at endless teasing, and Ace wouldn’t mind wrapping himself around that strong body.

Still. The aftermath is unlikely to be pleasant.

Eventually, Dom reacts to the time displayed on his phone with badly-concealed panic, so Ace decides to throw him out for his own good. He bats Dom’s hands away as he moves to tidy up after himself (so unexpectedly polite it’s adorable), and then they’re suddenly back by Ace’s apartment door, hovering uncertainly.

“Thanks”, he says and tries not to let emotion colour his voice too much, “I needed this.”

“Yeah, me too.”

Neither of them moves to open the door, they just face each other.

“Good luck with the rest of your deliveries.”

“I doubt any of them are gonna be as nice as this one.”

They smile and Ace’s heart is beating in his throat. He has to do something, at least just a little, or he’ll kick himself for sure. It’s been so long since he experienced this kind of chemistry within the first few minutes. “If you want -”, he starts and Dom talks at exactly the same time: “I don’t mean to -”

It’s dumb. They both know it’s the uncomplicated thing to just say goodbye, and yet Ace hears himself say: “Just kiss me.”

And Dom does so, without missing a beat, just leans forward and captures Ace’s lips with his own, and it feels like a fucking electric shock with how instantly he’s hit with deafening arousal. His arms wrap around Dom’s torso and pull him close while his tongue coaxes out its counterpart, both of them moaning desperately into this kiss, and Ace thinks this is bad this is really bad why did I think this was a good idea because it isn’t, and at the same time the rest of his body assures him it’s the best idea he’s had in a long time.

Dom crowds him against the nearest wall, making space for himself between Ace’s legs that are by now threatening to give in, and as Ace’s hands land on a beautifully-shaped arse they can’t help but squeeze, Ace gasps out, slightly frantic: “Just a kiss. Just a kiss.”

He could slap himself because Dom immediately stops sucking on his lower lip to bury his head in the nape of his neck, breathing him in and visibly holding himself back. “You’re so fucking hot”, he whispers and Ace’s toes curl at the way the words brush over his skin. He smells amazing, feels even better in his arms.

It’s so, so difficult not to act on it, not to go wild and suck him off right then and there – he’s hard, Ace feels it against his own erection. But he can’t. He doesn’t want to, knows what the end result will be. So he looks to the ceiling, composes himself, and eventually responds: “You too, and I wish you weren’t, because I’ll have to let you go and I’ll hate myself for it.”

A quiet chuckle lets him know that the moment is passing, that they’re getting over it. Their blood reduces from a boil to a simmer, their hearts quiet down. Once they’re breathing normally again, Dom presses their lips together once more and they exchange a few lazy kisses that lack the desperate urgency from a minute ago yet are full of warmth and appreciation. His embrace is tight and reassuring, his kisses sweet, the way he looks at Ace intoxicating. Good thing he was just about to leave.

And if the mood hadn’t died fully as of yet, Dom’s next sheepish question does the trick: “What’s your name, by the way?”

Ace just laughs before separating from him.

.

Once Dom really is gone, Ace is left buzzing, a latent energy humming underneath his skin. He’s overtaken by an addicting motivation, an unusual optimism, a grim determination. He will uphold his promise and somehow the fact that neither of them asked for each other’s number, that they didn’t agree to meet up again, that it’s possible they will never see each other again strengthens his resolve. Oddly, he feels as if Dom’s continued interest in him would’ve devalued their agreement – it might have to do with the fact that he’s witnessed people doing all kinds of things just to impress him or get into his pants, to which Dom would not have said no either, and yet his support felt sincere.

He decides he’ll do some research first, update his CV, lay the foundation for a successful application process, and then edge himself into oblivion while thinking of Dom. Make use of the adrenaline high while it’s still ongoing.

Almost as an afterthought, he checks his phone and indeed finds a reply from Bastien: prob not right now but later, anything serious?

Ace realises his encounter with Dom has done more for his mental health than hours of spending time with his best friend, decides not to analyse this fact too closely, and writes back: actually it’s fine, don’t worry. We still on for Christmas?

Yeah man, won’t let the gf interfere with that.

Good. He nods to himself, puts the phone away and opens up his laptop while trying to ignore the insistent pulsing in his crotch.

.

~*~

.

Ace has gone all out.

Not having to slog through each day knowing his efforts will go unappreciated has done wonders for his psyche, surprisingly – he expected to feel worthless, useless, lost without his daily routine but it turns out he can simply develop new structures that works for him. He makes sure he dresses each day regardless of whether he’s going out or not, he tries to cook instead of getting takeaway, he revived regular contact with his family and was touched over the supportive and encouraging messages he received after he had the courage to share his future career with them.

Maintaining himself is more effort than he thought and so he doesn’t get around to cleaning his flat properly or revisiting old projects and hobbies, but he’s sure it’ll come to him soon. Filling all the hours in a day is a struggle as well and more often than not he ends up in bed, watching some series or films instead of being productive, and it takes him a week to accept that this is fine, he doesn’t need to beat himself up over it. He manages. Whenever doubt creeps in, he reminds himself of the future ahead of him, of the prospect of fulfilling his dream. Finally. He knows he’ll succeed, he always does, and imagining himself in a healthier, happier place does wonders to motivate him.

And now, for Christmas, he made use of all his spare time and prepared a feast worthy for the gods. Preparing all his ingredients started yesterday, with him roasting and caramelising nuts, mixing his chocolate mousse so it has time to set, thawing the duck breast. He spent all morning in the kitchen, delighted at how easy it was to get out of bed because of it, and poured all his love into each dish. There’s still that small voice in the back of his mind, the one who simply refuses to die, who whispers to him: if you give him your all, he’ll realise your worth. No way any of Bastien’s many girlfriends has ever provided him with such an exquisite meal and since Ace’s friendship alone doesn’t seem to be enough, maybe it helps to view him as housewife material on top.

Their ‘tradition’ started two years ago, after Ace mentioned his family was scattered all around the globe and unable to meet up for Christmas meaning he’d have to spend it alone, and recently-dumped Bastien suggested they meet up, get drunk and watch terrible films together. Ace took it as a throwaway comment but his friend was serious, resulting in them doing exactly what Bastien said and having a whale of a time. The following year, they reprised their meet-up much to Bastien’s current girlfriend’s displeasure (though she didn’t last long anyway), and this year, Ace is going for something else entirely.

Before, they’d eat something cheap bought at a questionable food stall, the only one still open for miles, drink cheap booze and pass out once they’ve had enough. Today, Ace will surprise him with a fancy four-course feast he half prepared because it involves a few dishes he’s always wanted to make but never got around to and half to show how much Bastien means to him.

There’s also a red envelope sitting under the small plastic tree he put up in the corner of the living room, and its contents are as terrifying as they are exciting. Ace really did go all out, they don’t tend to gift each other presents. Especially not ones of this magnitude.

He’s just waiting for Bastien to turn up, most of the food is prepared to a point where it can be finished within a few minutes or simply needs to go in the oven or be heated on the stove – he’s mixed the dressing but not assembled the salad, cut the potatoes but hasn’t turned on the hob. The productivity did wonders for his mood, he’s turned up his music and danced along to it, sang where applicable, otherwise just imitated the melody. His phone buzzes, probably his sister elaborating on her convoluted Christmas plans, and then he reads a few scattered words and his world falls apart.

Ace sits down, puts the playlist on pause, phone in hand, and takes a deep breath. The salad dressing has a beautiful colour, the raspberry vinegar awarding it a deep red. He likely prepared too much food for two, let alone for one.

He promises himself he won’t cry over this.

Sorry man, the gf threw a tantrum when I told her I’d stay at yours and she’s been a bitch all day so I said I’d visit her family just so she calms down. I’d rather not spend the day with harpies but looks like I got no choice. Next year we’re definitely back on!

Another deep breath. The wooden surface of the table is cool against his forehead. He has no idea how long Bastien’s already been with his current significant other, wonders whether he’s even met her family yet though it sounds like he has, and he also notes how there’s no alternative date mentioned. Bastien could’ve suggested tomorrow as a sign of goodwill. Bastien could’ve cancelled earlier to ensure Ace doesn’t prepare anything in advance.

The arsehole could’ve shown a little empathy.

He’s fine. It’s fine.

It doesn’t matter.

Now he has a killer dinner all to himself and can voice chat with his parents later and the mulled wine actually doesn’t smell so bad. Tastes even better. He made it himself, warmed up some expensive red wine and added a variety of spices tickling his tongue – it goes really well with every course he selected. Planned out, shopped for, prepared, put so much thought into.

Fuck.

Fucking bastard.

He paces through the flat, throws another glance at the envelope and has to take a big gulp when he realises all the ramifications, when he realises how utterly stupid that bloody voice of his is, the one whispering all sorts of delusional crap like of course he’s going to say yes, he has absolutely no societal obligations, sure he’ll agree. No he won’t. He’ll look at Ace, bewildered, weirded out, and decline politely. And then he’ll text back even less than before. Tell a few friends about it, how odd it is, and they’ll put two and two together for him when they ask ‘wait the gay one?’ and he’ll understand and be awkward around Ace for the rest of his life.

His doorbell goes off and nearly has him drop his wine. Bastien, his heart suddenly knows, he just sent the text as a prank only to turn up a few minutes later with a thoughtful gift and his adorable lopsided smirk. Ace hurries to the door, yanks it open and is confronted with none other than Santa Claus.

“Ho ho ho”, says Santa, deep voice exaggerated, “you’ve been a naughty boy, haven’t you?”

Ace blinks at him, too aghast to reply. He’s about to tell Santa to shove it, he’s lost all Christmas spirit, when he faintly recognises the voice, the demeanour, the physique. “Are you -”

It’s him. Not Bastien, but possibly the second best person. Santa sets down his bag of presents and pulls the white bushy beard down to reveal a shorter, dirty blonde one, offering a hopeful grin. “Hi. I hope I’m not interrupting anything.”

I wish you were. Wordlessly, Ace downs the rest of the spiced liquor and tries not to think about why he’s so overwhelmingly relieved to have Dom turn up on his doorstep unannounced. His aura has changed, the air surrounding him charged with meaning as well as uncertainty – he’s expecting something, that much is obvious, but he’s also ready to be turned away. Ace doesn’t doubt for a second Dom would accept it if he refused. He’s more handsome than he remembered (as far as he can tell with the Santa costume), softer too. More inviting. He looks warm. “The hell are you doing?”, Ace wants to know, indicating his entirety and implying this is about the clothes and not… why he’s here.

Dom’s grin widens. “Got fired from the delivery job. Now I’m working as Santa. Not sure what’s unclear about that.”

This explains nothing. Ace examines him, knowing full well he’s got to fell a decision while in an emotionally vulnerable state – not that it’s Dom’s fault for turning up right now, he couldn’t know and still doesn’t. If it was anyone else, Ace would send them away to grieve in peace and wallow in self-pity.

Still, he kinda wants to brag about scoring a few interviews. And yeah, he could leave it at that, exchange some news, converse civilly, and then send him back home. But there’s the fact that a pretty large part of him wants something to happen. Even now, with the silly costume, he feels invariably drawn to this man.

“If this is an awkward time, I can come back later or not at all, that’s -” Dom snaps his mouth shut the second Ace steps aside to let him in, and though he probably didn’t mean to, his excitement briefly flashes on his face. It’s cute how thrilled he is, even cuter when Ace imagines him working up the courage to come here and open himself up to a pretty hurtful rejection, imagines him jogging up the stairs while thinking about what to say, imagines him fixing his costume before ringing the doorbell.

He closes the door and suddenly there’s this stranger in his home whom Ace wants to kiss until they can’t breathe anymore.

“Been a while since I last sat on Santa’s lap.” He can’t help himself, he has to reference the costume.

Another blinding smile. The clothes are too big and hiding his muscles as well as the tattoos, which is a shame, but he doesn’t look half bad. “Good thing I brought a sack full of gifts.”

“Terrible.” Ace shakes his head. “Why did I even let you in?”

“Because Santa comes but once a year?”

He rolls his eyes, amused despite the horrendous puns. As he enters the kitchen to put his glass away, he hears heavy footsteps following him and so he asks without turning: “Want some mulled wine?”

“I don’t need any alcohol, I’m drunk on you already.”

And good fucking god, that one gets him. Stabs him right in the heart, makes his knees goes weak despite how cheesy it is, because it’s been a hot decade since anyone said anything comparable to him. Unlike the ones before, this one is delivered with a quieter, more sincere tone of voice, and when he turns, Dom is standing really quite close. “Even worse”, he whispers and barely finishes the last syllable before Dom’s tongue is in his mouth. His hips snap forward and a hand lands on his backside as he groans into the kiss; instinctively, he slings his arms around the other man, wraps his legs around him as well and allows him to carry him to the bedroom as if he weighed nothing.

They land on the large bed, rolling back and forth as they fight for dominance, though when Ace has finally managed to undo the top of the Santa costume, he requests a brief timeout. As he thought, Dom’s chest is a sight to behold, ink adorning smooth skin, a trail of hairs leading down from his navel, and his eyes widen as he notices the dark metal peeking out from red cloth. His nipples are pierced. This really is a joyous day.

“Please tell me you got one down here as well”, he mutters after playing with one of the black rings, his fingers moving to cover the prominent bulge between Dom’s legs.

Dom’s smirk is encouraging. “I guess it’s Merry Christmas to you then.” He laughs at Ace’s wondrous expression, laughs even more when he immediately scrambles to undo the ridiculously large belt, and then he’s not laughing anymore.

The whole affair is over so fast Ace barely gets to enjoy it: he can’t remember the last time he was this turned on, cock twitching and wet by the time Dom gets to suck on it, and he’s loose and open and ready in a fraction of the time he usually requires. There’s just something about Dom that wakes a feral need inside him, reduces him to grunts and moans and teeth and nails, causes him to experience everything in troubling intensity. Every touch feels like fire on his skin, every thrust making him lose his grip on reality even more, and every noise from Dom’s throat pushes him a little more towards insanity.

He needs this man and once Dom is inside him, Ace is drowning in pleasure, not caring about volume or restraint at all, biting into his pillow and unconcerned about ripping it while he’s pounded into the mattress. It’s the purest form of ecstasy he’s ever felt, bliss coursing through his blood as he gives himself up entirely. And Dom is a force of nature, taking what’s his and then some, worshipping his body and letting out all that pent-up tension Ace releases as well, the two of them moving in unison towards a common goal, towards their climax.

Ace comes first, burying his face in the duvet and trembling his way through an absolutely mind-blowing orgasm, his dick jumping in his grip as it releases thick spurts of come, and Dom joins him soon after, growling in pleasure and gripping his hips so tight he’s probably bruising them. They ride it out and Ace relishes the aftershocks, the brief tugs on his muscles as he comes down from his high, as his breathing evens out, as his heartbeat slows.

And though Dom stays by his side for a minute or two to cuddle and stroke over his body, he eventually gets up to throw the condom away, wash his face, stretch his limbs a little. It’s the time Ace always uses to feel cold and lonely as well as wonder when the guilty conscience will set in – not if, but when. He knows how it goes, knows himself too well to persuade himself it won’t happen this time, that Dom is nicer than the others, that they’ll stay in touch. He knows how it goes.

“Mind if I smoke?”, his visitor asks, sitting on the bed by his feet and raking his gaze up and down Ace’s body.

His response comes out sharper than intended: “Don’t care if you burn.”

Dom reacts with a smile, unexpectedly, and takes the hint, misses out on his cigarette in favour of a compliment. “That felt really good.”

It did. It felt amazing. Ace doesn’t know whether he should show him the door now or make some small talk first. He’s uncomfortable, wants to dress without having to move around naked in front of Dom – it feels like he overshared, somehow. Showed too much.

“Want to open some presents?”

His brows draw together. “What?”

“Oh, this one needs a little bit of backstory. Alright.” Dom moves up on the bed, sits cross-legged next to him and settles in with an expression indicative of a good yarn, entirely unselfconscious as if he wasn’t even aware of his nakedness. “I wanted to get some extra cash over the holidays and figured I could play Santa for some families who need one – you know, there are those posh ones who want to make sure their little brats have a really special Christmas so they can go to school and brag about how they met Santa and all. You know what I’m talking about, right?”

Ace nods, propping his head up on his arm. This sounds like it’s going to be good.

“So I go all out, even call the parents yesterday to ask them a little about their kid, whether they’re doing well in school and behaving and all that, you know, gathering ammunition. If the kid’s a dick, I get to talk some sense into them, so I wanted to make sure they were fine. I had the dad on the phone, but his wife was prattling on in the background, making all kinds of plans it sounds like, involving him and constantly interrupting with questions. Sure thing, they’re probably busy over the holidays. He’s always like ‘Cynthia, give me a minute’ and ‘Cynthia, not now’, and ‘Cynthia, let’s talk about this later’. Fair enough.”

Ace raises a brow.

“Struck me as pretty entitled, kind of a bellend, you know the type, but not enough I’d cancel the gig. So I turn up today, turns out they’re having a dinner party with their childless friends and decided to subject them to a visit by Father Christmas just so their little princess is entertained. Huge mansion, expensive car, everyone sipping champagne – I’m amazed I was let in through the front door and not the servant’s entrance. They take me aside and give me all the stuff they’d gotten for their daughter so I can shower her in presents. The wife’s off again to entertain their guests and the dad condescends to talk to me a little. I mention my fee in passing and could instantly tell we were gonna have a problem.”

This part sounds familiar. Ace nods encouragingly, wholly invested in the story by now.

“He says he owes me nothing. He got the presents after all, if I needed a little bit of money for the clothes I’d get a tip but it apparently looked like a bathrobe to him so worth next to nothing, and I was already there, so I might as well get on with it. Charming, right? He’d decided on his own that I wasn’t worth a penny, don’t need to tell you how he talked to me, you can imagine.”

He can, yes.

“So I agree. Smile and tell him sure. Sure, I’ll do it for free. I love taking time on the holidays to play Santa for a spoiled little hellspawn – not in those words, of course – and then I go in and surprise the kid with the whole shebang. She’s amazed, fawning over Santa, telling her mum to come look, with one of the guests going ‘oh Ruth, every year you outdo yourself’ or something like that.”

Ace’s eyes widen, just like Dom’s grin.

“And yeah. I turn to the dad and, in my most innocent voice, I ask: isn’t your wife called Cynthia? Or did I mishear on the phone yesterday?”

“Oh shit.”

“I’m telling you, his expression was worth the wasted time and effort.”

“Did they…”

“Apparently, Cynthia is the babysitter and a distant relative of the wife’s, or at least that’s what it sounded like during the following argument. They remembered me at some point and threw me out, but let me tell you, those dinner guests will have to choose a side in the future.” Dom shrugs. “So yeah – I got to keep the presents, they didn’t demand them back. Wanna go through them?”

Ace blinks at the suggestion, trying to gauge whether he should feel gleeful or horrified at Dom’s dismissive attitude. They aren’t rightfully his, not really, but on the other hand… who even cares? Curiosity gets the better of him, and so he eventually nods. “Yeah. Alright.”

“Can I borrow some pants first? I’m afraid the only clothes I have are Santa’s, and while I appreciate the irony…”

They get up and dress together, Ace purposefully providing a sleeveless shirt for Dom and lying through his teeth about having run out of t-shirts (and the sceptical, knowing look he receives likely is the retribution for his own when he opened the door half-naked and Dom ogled him, it basically screams you are not subtle). While Dom helps himself to some wine, he puts on the fireplace DVD someone bought him as a joke, mentally laughing at them because it’s finally getting some use, and then they settle on the bed again to open their presents.

Well. To open some presents.

The first is wrapped in bright pink paper and immediately has Dom excited about its contents once he realises what it is. “This is expensive make-up”, he says, pouring its contents out on the bed.

“How old was the girl again?”

“Man, who cares about harmful gender stereotyping, you need to see how awesome I look with eyeliner.”

Ace bursts out laughing, merely fuelling Dom’s resolve. “Show me, then. I’ll open the next one.” He’s revealed three worryingly realistic plastic babies (he can’t remember them doing things like vomiting or sweating when he was younger) by the time Dom returns from the bathroom, the corners of his eyes darker and sharpened without looking overdone, and Ace nods in approval. “Not bad.”

“Now imagine me like this in all leather and on a bike.”

“Dude, I already slept with you, there’s no need to convince me any further.”

Dom snorts, accepting his reply as valid, and the two of them go back to judging gifts. There’s a junior edition of Trivial Pursuit in there, to their awe and horror, and they quickly start asking each other questions in between unwrapping increasingly girly presents.

“Which member of One Direction left the band in 2015?”, Ace reads while trying to hold still so Dom can properly line up the temporary unicorn tattoo on his belly.

No hesitation in Dom’s answer: “Ozzy Osbourne. Hey, stop laughing or it’ll come out crooked!” He tries to pin Ace down, the touches ticklish and making him giggle even more, and when he accidentally knees Dom in the ribs, his overdramatic wheezing has them both laughing.

“Oh!” Ace sits up suddenly. “I made food. Lots of it. Want to stay for dinner?”

Dom would very much like to stay for dinner. He even helps with the preparations, lets Ace rant at length about how well each course complements the others, compliments the wine together with each dish and is overall the perfect dinner guest. All while wearing that damn eyeliner. They eat their desserts on the bed again, surrounded by glitter and purple plastic, taking their time with the rich chocolate mousse while Dom recounts a story from one of his many previous jobs involving a life-sized cardboard cut-out of Will Smith and way too much Vaseline.

.

“Did you actually look for something electronics-related?”, Ace wants to know later during a rare lull in conversation, Dom stretched out on the bed like a comfortable cat and Ace perched next to him. What he really means is: did you keep our promise?

“Yeah. Of course. Haven’t heard anything back yet, but I did send out a few applications. I’ll just keep at it until I find something.”

There’s nothing but sincerity in his voice and Ace doesn’t doubt for a second that he’s telling the truth. After everything he’s seen today, Dom is authentic if sometimes snarky, thoughtful without realising, appreciative. “That’s great. I’m glad to hear it.”

Dom awards him a warm smile. “Thanks. How about you?”

“Pretty much the same”, he says, nodding. “I got a few interviews but not sure yet whether I’d accept if they wanted me.”

“Congrats, getting interviews is good. But know your worth. If it’s not where you wanna be, move on. You’ll find something else.”

Somehow, they both kept their end of the deal, undertook the endeavour of trying to improve their lives together yet separate from each other. And somehow, this doesn’t surprise him. They’re one step closer to where they want to be.

Overcome by sudden emotion, Ace crawls over and snuggles up to him, drapes himself half over the welcoming body and nuzzles his cheek. Warm arms pull him closer, card through his hair, pet his side. The fake fire crackles on the large screen opposite them. “This is nice, being here with you”, he mutters into Dom’s beard and the mental image of how it would’ve been if Bastien had come over today instead finds no space in his thoughts, is unable to take hold. All he knows is that Bastien is his friend and will never be anything more, no matter what. And he needs to accept it.

“You know”, Dom starts, interrupts himself and seems to pour over his words for a while during which he fidgets restlessly. “I’m really attracted to you, I think that’s obvious. But that’s not the only reason I came back here. I just really wanted to let you know that I didn’t break the promise, as dumb as it sounds. I wanted to share my progress with you. Somehow, that felt really important.”

Ace’s lips stretch into a smile. “I actually thought the same when I opened the door earlier. Just a, I don’t know, ‘I want him to be proud of me’.”

“Yeah, like that.”

The physical contact feels lovely, reassuring and safe. Belatedly, Ace realises how easily Dom pulled him away from the void into which he was threatening to fall earlier, avoiding all post-coital shame and embarrassment by glossing over it, engaging Ace with something else. He probably noticed the mood shift and refused to accept it.

Idly, his fingertips push Dom’s shirt up, stroke over his navel, brush against the ridges of his abs. The reaction is instant, he notices shallower breath, increased heart rate, no more fidgeting. His fingers travel higher, flip a metal ring back and forth, lightly stroke over a nipple. “Dom”, he says quietly, earning a questioning hum. “Do you want to fuck me again?”

The embrace tightens, possibly involuntarily. Very satisfying. Dom takes a beat to compose himself, then asks: “It’s the eyeliner, isn’t it?”

Ace pinches his nipple, prompting an interesting choked moan, and can’t help but smile. “Can we take our time though?”

.

They take their time for the second round. It’s slow, deliberate, almost tidal with how it ebbs and flows, gradually growing at a snail’s pace. Clothes are removed one by one, skin caressed, they don’t stop making out for half an hour during which Ace identifies most of Dom’s erogenous zones (and the other way round, he discovers soon). When they become one, they gaze into each other’s eyes, every sensation mirrored in their expression and it’s so intimate it hurts.

Communication is key, they take turns whispering filth and sweet nothings, disclosing their preferences, encouraging each other. Dom finds his sweet spot quickly and milks it until actual tears form in the corners of Ace’s eyes from the stimulation, and when Ace begs him to come inside, Dom obliges. They fall off the edge together, shuddering and moaning, moving in sync, their bodies pressed against each other in unbearable heat.

Again, there’s no awkwardness. Dom suggests a shower and Ace invites him to come along, he nearly falls asleep when the other man massages shampoo into his scalp, and when they’re back in bed, Dom spoons him without asking. There’s no question of whether he spends the night, both of them just assume he does.

Shrouded in darkness, Ace grows bold and speaks of something he wanted to bury deep in his memories so he’d forget and not be overcome by hot shame every time he remembered it. He was prepared to erase it from existence as best as possible, burn the envelope, even deny the plan, but now there might be an alternative.

“I did something dumb”, he states, to which Dom immediately holds him tighter in support. “I bought a trip. Round trip, three weeks, leaving the day after tomorrow. Hotels included, lots of sightseeing, some hiking. Some downtime, too.”

“That doesn’t sound dumb to me.”

“I bought two tickets.” Dom is suddenly very still. “I was gonna invite my friend along. You know, the -”

“Yeah. I know.”

“At this point, I don’t even want to go with him anymore, it wouldn’t have been fun. But I can’t refund it.” He waits, lets the implications sink in, allows Dom the chance to interject. He doesn’t. “Do you want to go with me instead?”

Dom takes a second to think it over. “Am I going because you genuinely want me there, or am I going because you don’t want it to go to waste? Because I’ll be honest, I’m very much fine with either option, I’d just like to know what’s up.”

A fair request, except that Ace has no answer. He feels extraordinarily comfortable in Dom’s presence, enjoyed himself today, is fiercely grateful for him saving the day instead of having to spend it alone in misery. He doesn’t think Dom is a rebound, he’s too unique for that.

“How about you sleep on it, I’ll leave you my number tomorrow, and if you still want me to come with you, you text me.”

That… actually sounds perfect. It allows Ace to make an informed decision, and the fact alone that Dom made a suggestion like this emphasises why he invited him in the first place. “You know, you’re different to most men that I’ve dated so far.”

“What, more hesitant?”

He snorts. “No. More reasonable.”

“That’s a little sad, but I’ll take it.” A beat. “Wait, are you saying -”

“Good night”, Ace interrupts him quickly, sparking a quiet chuckle. “And Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas. I’ll leave some more presents in you tomorrow if you want.”

And Ace takes that to be yet another promise.

#rainbow six siege #fanfic #oneshot #bandit/ace #ace #golden boy #bandit #this one lived rent free in my head for at least two years #FINALLY I got around to writing it #somehow I wrote almost all of it in one day and had a family dinner in between #I'm so so tired but also very proud of myself

[montygatorguy]

vacation sim appreciation post because i adore this game

i miss vacation bot she’s the best

#vacation simulator #job simulator #job bot #gig bot #efficiency bot #bandit bot #theyre so silly #i wrote fanfiction about them once #vacation bots an ace lesbian and efficiency bot is a mankisser #it’s the color pallets #vacation bot

[aparticularbandit]

Hina: I. have never fallen in love. I don't know what falling in love feels like. Which means I'm not a woman. Which makes me incapable of falling in love. Which makes me not a woman. Makoto, be my pretend boyfriend!

me: ACTUAL AROMANTIC AOI ASAHINA?????

#musings #bandit liveblogs #bandit liveblogs danganronpa #aoi asahina #danganronpa #hina: i just have to wait for jason statham! #me: ...so probably not ace WHATEVER STILL THINK SHE'S ARO or aro-spec

[bipherpol]

fun fact: i have an entire hoard of various unrelated fics that involve at least one member of cp9 related in some way to another character

#i think my favorite is the one where p much all of cp9 gets found as kids for some reason #by either rocinante or garp. roci's just like 'law have siblings' #while eight different kids are all just like 'what the fuck' #garp of course grabs all of them and drags them off to dawn and is just like 'luffy ace have more siblings' #(dadan and the bandits are not prepared for this) #(makino is very tempted to borrow one of the boys' pipes and whack garp with it) #meanwhile the cp9 kids are all just like 'um' #'you're my kids now!' 'i am literally like sixteen' says jabra #'is it considered turning traitor if we were kidnapped by a vice admiral and told we didn't have a choice' #i have at least one (1) fic where kalifa knows nami at least #and if you think i don't have a fic where i take kaku and forcibly adopt him as banchina's nephew and usopp's cousin you are wrong #listen i live for adopted siblings and chosen siblings and forcefully chosen siblings #so like. #also let's be real if garp dropped cp9 off at the bandits luffy would forcefully adopt all of them in a heartbeat #ace and sabo from off to the side: just give in now. we tried to kill him for like a monthstraight and he still liked us #anyway i have so many ridiculous fic concepts #and about 300k of various paulie/lucci fics hiding on my hard drive

[bumblebeeappletree]

Okay but a young Makino one day following Garp up the mountain out of curiosity and sees him talking with Curly Dadan. And then a little Ace comes up to her. He is adopted by Makino instantly, and Garp can’t stop her.

#one piece #fic ideas #makino #monkey d. garp #curly dadan #portgas d. ace #Makino sees young Ace and goes: mine #then comes along baby Luffy to Fusha and she goes: mine #then finally Ace brings back his friend Sabo and she goes: mine #of course the trio lives part time up the mountain with the bandits #but the rest of the time they live with her #and considering how young Makino is Dadan finds herself taking care of MAKINO too #Dadan: Garp stop springing brats on me #Garp: Makino and Sabo were outside of my control #Garp: and don’t call Makino a brat! #Dadan: Makino is the only one I use the word brat affectionately #Garp: then continue

[liviavanrouge]

Meeting Everyone pt 2

Riddle: *Sputters, staring at Nikki shocked*

Livia: *Looks at Riddle worriedly* Riddle....

Trey: Hah....I know he'd still react in some way...

Cater: Oh how cute! Hello, hello, it's Uncle Cay!

Nikki: *Leaps into Deuce's arms, passing everyone else up* UNCLE DEUCE!

Deuce: E-EH??!

Ace: *Glares at Deuce* Hey, how come she likes him more than us!

Trey: That was unexpected, thought she was going to Cater...

Cater: *Sighs* My feelings that hurt...

Bandit: I'm usually a child magnet..this is weird

Denzel: Not surprised she passed me up, my face scares kids...

Scribble: Very, very, scary, scary!

Denzel: *Swings his fist at Scribble, missing when the jackrabbit beastman dodged*

Hattie: Poor Denzie~

Maria: *Giggles but sighs* I'm her aunt...I feel sad that she passed me up

Nikki: *Beams, her arms around Deuces neck* I LOVE UNCA DEUCE!

Riddle: What exactly do you love about Uncle Deuce?

Trey: Yes, whats your favorite thing

Nikki: Unca Deuce gives me cheek kisses and head pats, he baked me chocolate cookies once!

Trey and Denzel: *Smirks, looking quite cheeky and smug* Kisses?

Riddle: *Grins* Deuce mind if you make me some cookies?

Deuce: *Laughs nervously, knowing this was gonna go on for a while*

Hattie: Deucey, I want a check kiss~

Scribble: Me too, me too!

Maria: *Smiles smugly* Deuce, mind if I receive a head pat~

Ace: Deucey, I want cookies too

Bandit: I want head pats too!

Livia: *Laughs, watching a flustered Deuce get surrounded by the others* Oh poor Deuce!

#twst deuce #deuce spade #deuce twst #twst riddle #riddle rosehearts #riddle twst #ace trappola #twst ace #ace twst #twst trey #trey clover #trey twst #twst cater #cater diamond #cater twst #twst denzel #denzel jabberwocky #twst bandit #bandit bandersnatch #twst maria #maria hoppers #hattie hatter #twst hattie #twst scribble #twst livia #twst oc #disney twst

[mt10lt20]

Ace Combat Zero - Crack sketch of a WTF dream ft. Cipher, Pixy and Joshua Bristow aka Wizard 1 aka why Larry shouldn’t let his ex and ex-ex meet, on the ground or in the air...

On second thoughts, having them meet on the ground is better as a frying-pan bonk is preferable to having Joshua’s F16XL blow up again. No idea why Cipher had a frying pan XD but the Demon Lord is one of many surprises.

#ace combat #ace combat zero #Cipher #Pixy #Wizard 1 #joshua bristow #Ciphixy #ex Pixy and JB #One would think that AC dreams involve shooting down bandits #but i got a few seconds of THIS instead #Joshua is just nervous around Cipher he forgot his Osean #and he really thinks Cipher is bananas #If Cipher didnt have a frying pan this would have been a bitchslap #super sketchy so things are off plz dont look too hard #XD #shippy stuff