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cwritesforfun · 1 month
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The Bear: Carmen 'Carmy' Berzatto x Fem!Reader: Crush
You work at the Bear as the hostess when Sugar needs help and you're close with Carmy, Sydney, and Marcus. You like everyone else, but you're just closest with those three. Richard keeps trying to force you and Carmy to be alone together, so he annoys you right now. (YES, the plot has changed.)
Y/N = Your Name
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Your POV
You open your phone bright and early to see a text from Carmy: Call me if you get this before 5:30 or before you leave. You click the call button next to his number and wait for him to answer.
****Start of conversation Y/N - Hey Chef... what's up? Carmy - Richard said you live near me. Could you drive me to work? Y/N - Yeah, uh can you send me your address? I just finished breakfast and I just need to get my shoes on. Carmy - Yeah, okay I sent it. Y/N - You're only a 5 minute drive from me. I'll be there soon. I'll text you when I leave. Carmy - Thanks Y/N... Thanks, Chef. End of conversation****
You wait in your car for Carmy and see him exit his building. He climbs into your car and you let him buckle his seatbelt before driving off.
As you drive, Carmy says, "So... uh my car... it uh broke down yesterday. Richard doesn't have his license and he didn't want to risk driving me to work. I think he just didn't want to drive me because he drives me around all the time. He told me you lived closer to me than he did. So I called you. Thanks for ... thanks for driving me." You exclaim, "It's totally okay. I don't mind. I like getting to work early and you live very close, so this works out for us both. Do you need a ride back to your place after work too?" He answers, "Yeah if you don't mind." You reply, "No, I don't. I can drive you until you get your car fixed. It's cool. Do you want a homemade protein bar?" He answers, "Sure... I guess." You reply, "You can say no, I don't care. It's the only way I can survive working these shifts. It has peanut butter, maple syrup, protein powder, oats, and that's it. They're delicious and they fuel you until the next meal." He replies, "I'll try one, then. If you care about it this much and you made them, they have to be good." You keep driving and you hear Carmy say, "Fuck, these are good. I could eat a whole tray." You reply, "Thanks."
We park, you hand out the rest of the protein bars to the rest of the staff, and you help set up and clean the dining area once more. You then help Marcus with desserts. You used to always say that dessert was your favorite meal, but now it's tied with dinner. Pasta and garlic bread together could kill you, but you'd be okay with it because you'd die happy. Making desserts brings you so much joy because there's something so amazing about the process of picking the right amount of ingredients to decorating them before customers eat them.
Your shift starts and it's packed. It's Saturday and there are tons of people hustling in. You even fill the bar with walk-ins. Richard runs the dining room with ease and you can tell he's at home here. At a quiet moment, he slides behind the hostess stand next to you and asks, "So, how was the ride this morning?" You answer, "Carmy and I talked. He liked the protein bars I made. It was good. He thinks you had an ulterior motive for not driving him." He smirks and replies, "I did. I want one of you to cut that sexual tension and confess your feelings." You laugh and say, "He's my boss and I like this job." He replies, "We both know you're just passing time here because you love the people. You make way more at your weekday job. You could easily quit working here and date him." You reply, "I could. I don't know. I am not quitting." You hear, "What's this about quitting?" You see Carmy standing there looking between the both of you. Richard says, "I was just telling dear sweet Y/N that she could quit working here. She makes more during the week. She doesn't need to overwork herself." Carmy turns to you and asks, "Are you overworking yourself?" You answer, "No I'm not. Thanks for your concern." Carmy says, "Yeah no problem. It's time for your 15-minute break and I was wondering if you wanted to take it with me. Richard can handle it out here." You answer, "Sure, yeah. Richard can handle it." Richard says, "I hate you when you two gang up on me. Just date already and make me happy." Carmy and I both shove Richard who says, "That was scarily in sync."
Outside, you eat a donut that was messed up by Marcus and Carmy smokes by your side. Carmy exclaims, "I know you don't have to come in on weekends and you shouldn't feel obligated because Sugar asked you to. I don't want you to overwork yourself and not have time for yourself because it's important to care for yourself. I don't want you to not be okay. I just... I care about you." You reply, "I care about you too and don't want you to overwork yourself either. You work as much as me, Carmy. I don't feel obligated to work because of Sugar or anyone else. I like working at the Bear because I love the people here. I have Sunday off every week and usually I get to work from home at least 2 days a week, so the work week feels less stressful. I will let you know if I ever need a break." He nods and says, "Good good. I want you to be able to come to me if you ever need anything." You reply, "Same to you. I'm here if you ever need anything too. Speaking of, I'm making dinner for Marcus, Sydney, and I tonight after work? Do you want to come over too?" He asks, "Are you sure? I wouldn't want to mess up your plans together." You answer, "It's all good. We just eat, drink, and either play games or watch tv. It's really chill and nice." He replies, "Ok, as long as you let me help cook." I reply, "Sounds good. I could always use the help."
When you told Sydney and Marcus that Carmy was joining for dinner, they were so happy. They also want you to tell Carmy that you like him. Why does everyone want you to? chill...
Carmy gets in your car after work and says, "Sorry that you had to wait. I had to make sure things were all set for tomorrow morning." You reply, "It's okay. Do you need anything from your apartment before we go to my place? I can stop." He answers, "Yeah I do, thank you."
You drive to his apartment and wait for him in the car. He tells you that he is going to take a 5-minute shower and then he'll be down.
You drive to your apartment when Carmy gets back and park in your spot in the garage. Carmy asks, "Do you have to walk in this garage every night?" You answer, "Yeah, why?" He answers, "I just want you to be careful." You reply, "Awww you're very caring today. It's sweet." He replies, "I don't think anyone's ever said I was sweet unless it was as a joke." You reply, "Carmen Berzatto, you're genuinely one of the kindest people I know. You go out of your way and show people you care about them despite all you've been through. You always make me feel cared for and understood. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise." He replies, "Thank you." You reach over, squeeze his hand, and say, "I meant every word." He squeezes your hand back and smiles.
After getting to your apartment, you give Carmy a quick tour of the place. You have a 2-bedroom apartment with your best friend from college who is visiting her boyfriend out of town for the week. It's small, but it's yours and it's great.
You put music on your speaker then head to the kitchen. Carmy asks, "What can I do to help?" You answer, "I'm making chicken, fried rice, and stir-fry vegetables. It's essentially just chicken fried rice. I made dessert last night too that I can break out later. Do you want to help chop vegetables?" Carmy answers, "Yes Chef. It sounds like it will be a good meal, have you made it before?" You hand him vegetables and say, "Yeah it's one of my favorite things to make for people. Marcus requests it at least once a month and Sydney requested the dessert." He takes the vegetables as you set out knives on a chopping board for him to start cutting stuff. You have just enough time to start the rice when you hear the doorbell ring.
Sydney and Marcus walk in. Sydney says, "I present you with tonight's wine and beer of choice. We got dry Riseling wine and Pilsner beer to pair with our dinner. Then, we brought vodka for the dessert cocktail." You cheer and say, "I'm so excited. This'll be great." You go back to prepping the meal to see that Carmy is working fast. You should've known he'd be quick. He's a chef for a living. Sydney asks, "Y/N, do you want a glass of wine or a beer as you cook?" You answer, "Beer please." Sydney asks, "What about you, Carmy?" Carmy answers, "Yeah, I'll take a beer, sure."
Sydney and Marcus stand by talking to you and Carmy as you cook. The cooking time flies by and it's time to eat. You put the dessert in the center of the table for after dinner. You made red velvet brownies.
At the dinner table after everyone is served, Marcus exclaims, "And today, we thank the world for bringing Y/N to the Bear. Without her, I wouldn't have a dessert buddy or this chicken fried rice." You laugh and Sydney says, "I can't wait for dessert. I'm gonna need the rest to-go. Don't eat too much boys." Carmy asks, "Why aren't you a chef? This is fucking delicious." Sydney says, "Woah there Carmy. Save some compliments for the rest of us, buddy." You laugh and say, "Thank you all for the kind words. I have some already packed to-go for you, Sydney." Sydney replies, "And this is why I love you!"
Soon enough, the beer and wine are finished. And the cocktails begin... they work tomorrow, which is wild how much they're consuming. We're sitting on the couch now. Carmy is next to you and his arm has been wrapped around your shoulder for most of the night. You don't mind at all, but will he regret it? I guess it's not a kiss.
After you all watch a movie, Marcus announces to everyone he needs sleep. Carmy seems confused when Marcus pulls out a blow-up mattress and starts to inflate it. Oh, guess you forgot to tell him that they usually spend the night. You should never drink and drive, so Marcus brings an air mattress. Sydney sleeps on the couch. You make breakfast for them or have something prepped to take on-the-go for them in the morning depending on how much you drink.
You exclaim, "Carmy, uh... could you help me carry the stuff on the table into the kitchen?" Carmy nods and he helps you bring stuff to the kitchen before he asks, "Why are Marcus and Sydney getting ready for bed here?" You answer, "Right, yeah I forgot to tell you that. They spend the night if they drink a lot or if one of them isn't the designated driver. I even make them breakfast in the mornings too. I just want them to be taken care of and safe. You're welcome to stay the night too...or I can call you a cab. The only place is in my bed if you're okay sharing." He asks, "Only if it's okay with you? I don't think I would make it back to my place honestly." You answer, "It's all good. There are extra toothbrushes and stuff in the bathroom closet that you can use." He replies, "Yeah I'll go get ready for bed then. Will you be coming to bed soon?" You reply, "Yes, I just want to make sure both of them are all good before I go to sleep." He nods and walks off.
You go to make sure that Marcus and Sydney are taken care of. Sydney pulls you to her and says, "OMG! So are you and Carmy like dating or something?" You ask, "Why would you think that?" She answers, "Dude, he had his arm around you, he was positive, and he complimented you. If you're not having sex to make him happy, I'm seriously questioning his mental state." You reply, "I feel like that's rude to say. He is allowed to be happy." Marcus replies, "And you are too, you know? With or without him, we support you." You reply, "That's so sweet, Marcus. Thank you both. Now, what do you guys want for breakfast? I have stuff for burritos, pancakes, or overnight oatmeal." Sydney says, "We want burritos. I can guarantee you that is what Marcus wants." Marcus laughs and nods. You talk with them a bit more before you lay out some stuff for breakfast then head to your room. You need to shower so badly...you stink so much from work.
Carmy is staring at your bed when you walk in. You laugh and say, "The bed won't bite, Carmy. You can take either side. I sleep on the side where that book is if you don't want to take my side. I'm going to shower, but I'll be back soon. Feel free to read any of the books or look at anything. I trust you and I don't care." He nods and you go to the bathroom. You then throw on your matching set of pajamas. You leave the bathroom to see Carmy looking at your book and photo collection. You ask, "See anything you like?" Carmy answers, "Yeah actually I'm really impressed with your photos. Did you take all of them? And have you read all of these books?" You laugh, stand next to him, and answer, "I have read the top two shelves. That cart is books I need to read still. The photos are all mine, except the ones I'm in. Those were mostly taken by family members. I can always take more of the Bear if you guys ever need any promotional content." He replies, "Thanks, I might just take you up on it. Your bed is comfy by the way. I uh... I didn't know how comfortable you were with me sleeping there so I waited for you." You sit on your bed and pat the space next to you. He walks over and gently sits next to you. You say, "See, that's not so bad. And, I don't care that we're going to share this bed. I feel safe around you and I trust you. It's all good." He asks, "Why do you always compliment me? I mean, everyone at work hates me during work hours because of how much I scream and the standards I hold people to. But you... you just see the light in me." He looks so broken. It's truly sad he doesn't see what you see. You put your hand on his shoulder gently and say, "Because of what I see in you, Carmy. I see someone so kind and safe and trusting and hard-working. Yes you can scream, but we all can and that's the way of the kitchen. You do apologize when you're in the wrong and that's what counts. The standards you set are the reason that the Bear has such delicious food and has a steady influx of customers. You wanted this place to be successful and you had a dream. People just need to see what you see and once they know the standard, it's golden. So yes, I will compliment you when I want to." He puts his hand on the one on his shoulder and says, "You're so perfect... listen, I heard you all talking in the living room. If everyone thinks we're already dating, why don't we give it a try?" You answer, "Sure, when we're both free next, we can go on a date." He asks, "What would you say if I took off tomorrow and we just spent it together?" You ask, "You are going to take off tomorrow. I don't believe that for one second." He smirks and replies, "Richard and Sydney can handle it. I have a date I need to go on." You smile and say, “If you take off, I will gladly go on a date with you tomorrow. And if you don’t take off work tomorrow, I’m free after 5 every night this week and I’m off on Sundays every week.” He replies, “I’ll call Richard right now. Here we go. I’ll even put him on speaker phone so he behaves.”
You laugh.
**** Start of conversation Richard - Is something wrong, Carmy? You never call me this late. Carmy - Everything is fine. Look, I’m with Y/N right now. Richard - Define with. Are you dating her now? Why are you at her house late? Did you get laid? Give me more. Y/N - Chill, Richard. Richard - Oh hi … wow Carmy wasn’t lying that you were there. Carmy - I’m at her place, moron. Now listen, I’m taking off work tomorrow all day so I can go on a date with Y/N and spend the day with her. Richard - Holy shit you’re not coming to work! Y/N really has changed you. This is blowing my mind right now. I should’ve bought a lotto ticket tonight. Damn it. Carmy - Cousin, shut up. Tell me, can you handle tomorrow? Richard - Yes I can. The staff and I can. I know how everything runs and I will call you after closing to tell you how it goes to make you happy. Although you will probably be getting laid, so you’ll already be happy. Y/N - Please shut up. Carmy - Yeah Cousin, there is a lady present. Bye and thank you. Richard - Use protection kids. End of conversation ****
After hanging up the phone, you ask, “How does it feel? You’re going to get to sleep in and you’re going on a date tomorrow.” Carmy answers, “Honestly, I’m excited. This might be the best day of this year for me.” You laugh and lean your head on his shoulder. He cuddles close to you and says, “I wasn’t really nervous about sharing a bed with you … I was nervous about telling you my feelings and then you rejecting me or just wanting to be friends. I've been overthinking how I should tell you my feelings and when. Richard has also been pushing me about it and I knew deep down that he was right.” I laugh and say, "Don't let him hear you say that. I do have to get up to make breakfast for Sydney and Marcus in the morning, but I will go back to bed after." He says, "Wait one second, I'll be right back." He slides out from under me and walks out my room. OK?? What??
Carmy returns looking confused and weirded out. I ask, "Where did you go? You have a weird face right now." He gets in bed, opens his arms for me, and says, "They were just drunk and were happy that I asked you out. I forget how honest people are when they are drunk. It was weird. I just went to ask them if it was okay that you didn't make them breakfast because I wanted you to have sleep and to sleep in with me. I hope that's okay. I just heard you talk with Richard about how you don't want to overwork yourself and I want you to have rest for the week." I kiss him on the cheek and say, "You're so sweet. I'm not mad. I'm very glad you were looking out for me."
PART TWO
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unlikelyjapan · 8 months
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s2e4 rewatch notes
I'm a bit tired, please forgive the typos:
At the intro, we get a montage of the permits and files and drills, the sense of urgency - the furiousness of the work and notes begging Carmy for something (that was probably already set on his list in the last episode). I guess I stopped paying attention to the timelines - they're now 7 weeks out with no walls and we haven't really gotten into the meat of the series yet - meaning we don't really see Carmy flake the fuck out until 1 month from opening.
Sugar's "don't tell anyone - this is my problem" bit is so sad, watching her castigate herself for bringing another her/carmy/mikey/donna/their dad into the world. I also hate the way such a heavy moment was turned into such a "womp womp - wall fell" moment, as the situation (and Sugar) deserved a lot more gravitas.
But this is a show through the male lens. Richie feels vindicated that he "guessed it". Carmy doesn't know how to show his concern (and to be fair, she'd probably pummel him if he expressed anything in that moment), but the fact that he still lets his sister shoulder so much of the restaurants burdens alone through the rest of the series shows the level he disassociates from his family (even his only caring/loving family member) at every turn.
Marcus is such a good son - I hope in season 3 we get a (posthumous, I presume) look at who his mother was, what shaped his character, how his brother/father play a role (if any) in his current family dynamic etc.
The Chester + Marcus pairing is a magical talisman that protects the show from a deluge of male-on-male emotional evasion, jousting and toxic co-dependency. I don't care that Chester is about as believable as Claire as a character, mainline that shit into my veins.
I love that Carmy ensured that Marcus would have the identical experience he had when he staged in Copenhagen (as described in Fishes to Mikey) - this is in no way coincidental, he would have had to make plenty of arrangements/requests to Marie for things to play out that way. He wanted Marcus to see Copenhagen through the same magical lens he did, knowing Marcus needed the inspiration and a break from his own version of family strife.
The invisible cat (Coco), the looming presence of Marcus' mom on the viewers minds, and the bike scene are three great examples of things that feel foreboding (like the other shoe is going to drop on Marcus) but never actually amount to anything. Whether existential or hopeful, I like it.
"Do you know how to make Shisho Gelee?" - this is such a gentle test to see how insecure Marcus is in this environment. Passing him the recipe as he's googling was an awesome act of amnesty. It immediately brings out Marcus' curiosity in the next scenes - he's asking all the right questions and looks so joyful when Luca gives him concise answers.
The scenes played out to Otis Redding's "I've Been Loving You Too Long", starting with "You're tired - and you want to be free" playing as Marcus walks home. Temporarily free from the impending death of his mother at home after a long illness. Free from the constraints of the (up until now) low-level jobs Marcus' has held down in kitchens with minimal inspiration and nowhere to go. Free from loneliness? The next cut is Sydney interviewing staff, as if on cue.
The quenelle - the heavy-lovin' part of the song as Marcus' is immersed in his work with Luca, falling in love with the ritualization of his craft. Things in Marcus' life haven't exactly been going right, but this is a place of solace. He follows this up by calling his Mom - professing his love for his craft, as well as for her.
Sidebar: The minty snickers bar is almost a sexual release scene during the ballad. I get why so many folks were led down the road to hell that is Marcus x Luca fanfic, as weird as I think that is (no hate! do you!)
The song ends with the pastry dissection on the boat. This man found love/spiritual release in Copenhagen, just like Carmy. "Mission accomplished, I guess."
Fak saying "Dude! We're best friends, we don't tell secrets!" re: the alliance stuff. So....every dude at The Beef/Bear is his best friend, Sugar is Mommy, and Sydney (and Tina, for that matter) are ????
I feel like Fak may be the thing that continues to insulate The Beef/The Bear as a Berzatto clubhouse for wayward boys at this juncture, but I'm originally from Canada (and thus have been force-fed Matty Matheson a.k.a Fak-Light since the mid-aughts) so there's probably some bias creeping in here.
Luca started as a chef 14 years ago. If he entered the profession and competed against Carmy at the same level/experience as a high-school graduate, that makes him and Carmy in the rough age range of 29-32, adjusting for education sans A-levels in the UK. We can put away that screenrant article and die in peace now.
Mikey was "Really tight, but also really out of his fucking mind, and he wanted to open a bakery". Something something Berzatto parallels.
Luca says "I've got a younger sister, somewhere, yeah" after asking about Marcus' family. Luca's got a case of the family damage, the trouble in school, a past-tense case of the ferocious mopes - all the same watermarks as Carmy. Meanwhile, Marcus was just sharing his mothers prognosis, and speaks of his brother with no ill will (even though he doesn't appear to be in the caretaking position with his mom) - are they foreshadowing that Marcus' doesn't have the damage that makes a truly great/ritualized/masochistic chef in the long run?
Luca's may have learned more lessons in life than Carmy has (in part by being thwarted by Carmy) but the habits borne out of family evasion/searching for something else are so engrained with that backstory. Or maybe Marcus' represents the happier/new way of doing things, breaking the toxic cycle (more thoughts on this down the line).
Luca worked to keep up with Carmy after he came to a place of acceptance that he'd never be the best, and that ended up being enough for him. Maybe a blessing is that Marcus' gets to sidestep the whole toxic cycle and just absorb knowledge (from Luca, from Carmy, from Syd) - he's not in a running position, just like Tina.
But of course, we never worry about Tina - she's too self-possessed. Marcus is emotional and easily influenced, so I have a feeling his narrative could turn on a dime.
Luca says "At a certain stage, it becomes less about skill and more about being open....." In summary:
Marcus - Open, but I fear could easily become closed in the wrong environment/trauma.
Carmy - Closed, doesn't really understand how to open when not hiding behind the guise of the restaurant/Syd/emotional fabrications
Sydney - Wants open, but always closes instinctively for self-protection.
Natalie - Open, with the limited emotional tools she has at her disposal.
Richie - *learning* to open, but that's a long fucking road.
Tina - Open
"It helps to have good people around you, too" - see above. The Bear represents the inherent goodness of people, with familial history run roughshod over it.
Marcus asking "Was It worth it? The time you put in" quickly followed by Luca saying "I dunno....ask me tomorrow"
Isn't this the feeling of fecklessness that almost everyone has with their creative craft being converted to labor? There's been a lot of theories floating around that Carmy doesn't like cooking anymore/never liked cooking - could it just be the long-standing feeling of irrelevance when you've taken a deep-dive into your craft for so long that you can't see the forest (inspiration, caring for people) through the trees (red tape, skill level, trauma etc.)?
The man on the bike could also represent saving someone the way that Marcus can't save his mom - it alleviates some of the feelings of powerlessness, and the exchange of comfort in the hug a reciprocity he can no longer experience with her.
"Are you sure you want to get back on the bike?"
A bad thing happened, but the man feels compelled to keep moving - as Marcus said to Syd in S1 "just keep moving" - there are a bunch of metaphors for just proceeding with the restaurant here.
Syd is literally just being goofy and talking to Marcus like a friend when he first calls - I guess I imagined there being a little more heat/aloofness there on her behalf, but it's giving friend-zone. She wouldn't act so familiar if there was a crush, I don't feel its in her DNA....
Marcus sharing the nightmare about his mom's impending death with Sydney is huge (again, the other shoe dropping) - Sydney tries to give an empathetic response (she's not great at anything with a whiff of mortality to it, but she approaches the topic with optimism) and caps it off with a "ugghh - I miss you man" as a reassuring gesture - he's her friend and a great source of comfort.
He nods quietly, waits a beat, and says "I miss you too" - and you can tell the pregnant pause has let Syd know that there's gravity/consequences to her words. She diffuses with the freeze humor because what the hell else are you going to do once a guy tells you about his dying mom nightmare, you spurt out a casual "I miss you bro" and he responds back tenderly that he misses you too. Unenviable.
"Okay, goodnight dude" - Syd hangs up immediately. Oof. Everyone talks about Syd getting a love interest in season 3 to level the stakes with Carmy, but I want Marcus' to bag a hot expediter or something just so there's a bit of joy in his life without a crazy dramatic subplot ensuing.
The mild smile on Marcus' face is so peaceful when he masters the dessert. It's such a quiet satisfaction you can only get when you create things. What a nice way to end the episode.
Holy crap, this was far too long. If you stuck it out, thank you!
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obsessedwithdavrick · 2 years
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All of my fics are David and Patrick focused. My pseud is not obsessedwithdavrick for nothing.
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Don't want to lose because I didn't play There are a bunch of guys playing pool at the Wobbly Elm and David and Stevie have never seen them before.
A series. Starts with an E rating.
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One little drabble
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pycnanthemum · 2 months
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Covid Safer Sex Work: Harm reduction for in person workers during an ongoing pandemic
January 2024
(Introductory excerpt below, link to full Google doc below that)
"Intro 
This guide has been created by a sex worker in the UK who is angry and frustrated at the absence of clear public health information and mitigations for the ongoing Covid pandemic. I aim to provide clear and accessible information about what Covid is, how it affects us and the best tools we have to mitigate it. All the information in this guide is backed up by peer reviewed research and clinical trials. I also used a lot of the information provided at covid.tips and the John Snow Project, so thank you to the creators of those resources. If I am not sure about something, or if there is scientific debate, then I will make this clear.
As in person workers who cannot wear masks at our job, full service sex workers and strippers are some of the most at risk groups for poor outcomes from a Covid infection. The information here has been devised to help in person sex workers stay safer at work, but it is equally applicable to workers such as bar staff who also cannot mask whilst on shift. Covid is a class issue, and working class people are bearing the brunt of suffering from the pandemic; by sharing information and resources, we can help keep each other safe.
A note about masks: masks remain our best defence against infection. None of the mitigation strategies listed below are as effective high quality, well fitted masks, and all of them work best when paired with masking. This guide is written to help people to reduce the chances of infection when they are unable to wear masks at work. If you are able to mask at your job, or if you are able to mask outside of work, such as in shops and public transport, then it is important to do so. Please do not take the information included in this guide as a replacement for masking in situations where you are able to. Masks protect people around you, not just yourself. 
Sex workers are stigmatised as vectors of disease, but in reality we are usually experts at infection prevention and harm reduction when it comes to sexual health. In the 1980s, it was street based sex workers in Sydney who were advocating for condom use as a preventative measure against HIV infection, whilst brothel managers refused to allow the use of prophylactics in parlours. Sex workers and queer people have long been at the forefront of resistance to pandemics - we share safety information with one another from the ground up because we know that the state won’t protect us. Wearing masks whenever possible to protect each other from covid is an indispensable part of resisting the ongoing pandemic and creating a culture of collective care. The government has abandoned us to repeated Covid infections, but this does not absolve us of the need to take individual precautions to protect those around us."
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funkatello · 7 months
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Experience the Taste of Italy: Top Italian Restaurants in Sydney You Must Try
From the sunny coast to the snow-covered mountains in the north, Italy has a wide range of foods that food fans all over the world enjoy.
We're lucky to have a little bit of Italy right here in the city, thanks to the many Italian restaurants in Sydney that are always busy. Whether you're looking for the best pasta in Sydney or the best Italian food in Sydney, this guide will take you on a culinary journey and show you the best Italian places in the city that you have to try.
1. Funkatello: The Italian Gem
The number one spot on our list goes to Funkatello, the Italian gem. This Italian restaurant does a great job of mixing traditional recipes with a modern twist, making for an eating experience that is both traditional and unique. Here, you can eat everything from delicious osso buco to mouthwatering tiramisu. Each dish is carefully made to make your taste buds feel like they are in Italy. And, of course, their best pasta in Sydney, so anyone who loves pasta should go to Funkatello.
2. 10 William Street
Chef Francesco Ruggiero of William Street's fresh, wine-friendly meal for Bill stays true to this rule for best Italian food in sydney. This hip dive bar's hidden hit is the light and delicate farinata pancake with anchovies, mascarpone, and herbs on top. Ask the helpful staff for help with the long list of minimal intervention wines, one of the restaurant's specialties, including well-known brands like Jean-Francois Ganevat, Sami-Odi, and Paolo Bea. It is now possible to book a table ahead of time.
3. AlbertoÕs Lounge
You can have the best time with the best food here. In an alley, cozy wooden seats and a painting by artist Allie Webb that is only one color stand out. At Alberto's, the food is filling, real, and very tasty. You should order a bottle of wine to go with the restaurant's delicious homemade pasta. The linguine al nero, which is served with king prawns, tomato, and saffron butter, is a great example. How could you not like it?
4. aÕMare
On a nice weekend, there should be enough people to fill all 200 seats at a'Mare Stanley street restaurants. First, it is one of the country's best models of classic Italian luxury. The chef at Ormeggio in charge of the more unusual meals, Alessandro Pavoni, seems to be having a great time with the idea. He walks around on the soft carpet while waitresses in uniform mix pesto at each table. Along with a great list of wines, the staff is knowledgeable and fun to talk to. Big? Expensive?Sure. Special? Plus a lot more!
5. Fontana
The basic decor of the diner is broken up by a plant here and there and an abstract oil-and-pastel painting by Chanel Tobler. But what Fontana lacks in decor, it makes up for in interesting food and out-of-the-ordinary Australian and Italian wines.
Paccheri pasta, the best pasta in Sydney, is served with a kangaroo-tail ragu stewed in red wine and stock, which is similar to the cozy oxtail stew coda alla vaccinara. A special slab of ricotta is made fresh every morning and served with just olive oil. And the best part? Fontana has a fixed location, while Don Peppino's moves around.
Conclusion
When you eat the best Italian food in Sydney, you get more than just a full stomach. It's about getting to know Italy's rich history, culture, and customs right here in our beautiful city. Whether you have the best pasta in Sydney at Funkatello, check out the lively Stanley Street restaurants, or treat yourself to a fancy meal in a Darlinghurst restaurant, you're taking part in a culinary journey that goes from Sydney to the heart of Italy. And what's the best part? You can get a taste of Italy whenever you want by making an appointment.
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atlanticcanada · 11 months
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N.S. makes training, criminal record checks mandatory for late-night bouncers
Security staff at late-night bars in Nova Scotia will soon need a criminal record check and training.
The province says security staff will have to take an approved security training course by July 1 in order to work.
They will also need a criminal record check and complete a responsible beverage service course by Canada Day.
“Providing additional training for security personnel who work in the bar scene is a positive step,” Natasha Chestnut, executive director of the Restaurant Association of Nova Scotia, in a Friday news release.
“When individuals have the resources and skill sets to support them in doing their job, it is beneficial to the health and safety of customers and employees."
At least one manager or supervisor who has completed both programs and provided a criminal record check will also need to be on-site while the bar is open.
The late-night bars, known as “cabarets” receive a special liquor license and are considered “high risk” because they can stay open until 3:30 a.m.
Bars that violate the rules will be subject to punitive measures including a liquor license suspension, the province says.
The new rules will apply to the Capri Cabaret in Sydney and the following bars in Halifax:
The Dome/Level 8 Night Club & Lounge
HFX Sports Bar & Grill/The Alehouse
Toothy Moose
from CTV News - Atlantic https://ift.tt/2TWzhJM
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comedyinsydney · 1 year
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Congratulations to our 🎤 Sydney Comedy School Graduates “ Angus Boyd, Ryan Evans, Gary Richardson and Romy Palan”. Tonight it was a sold out event, we apologize to those who couldn’t get seats. The students came with the laughs ( we knew they would 😄) thanks to our Special Guest MC “ Rob Andrews” and guest comic“ Henry Zhu”. It was a great night. Thanks to the management and staff at the 3 monkeys Bar 🙈🙉🙊 for keeping the drinks and food flowing. If you missed out on seats, we’re back for our next graduation show on June 8th. Tixs already on sale. Great job everyone 👏🏽 🎤 Australia’s School of Stand Up Comedy Grad Night“ Where we showed them,how to tickle their bones 😅“ https://www.comedyintheraw.com.au 2023 Next Comedy School Course Dates: Sydney : June 4th-8th and July 16-Aug 13th. #bonkerzcomedyaustralia #standupcomedyschools #comedyclubssydneycbd #comedy #sydneycbd #comedyclubs #comedysydney #sydneygeorgestreet #comedyschoolmelbourne #laughter  #bonkerzaustralia #sydneypubs #liveperformances #comedians #comedyschooladelaide #festivals #comedyfestivals #fringefestivals #comedyschoolcanberra #openmiccomedysydney #bonkerzcomedyaustralia #standupcomedyschoolssydney #comedyclubssydneycbd #comedyschoolbrisbane (at 3 Monkeys Pub) https://www.instagram.com/p/CqaY48kvd9X/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
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viteducation · 1 year
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There are several job opportunities in the national and international market for Diploma of Hospitality Management Australia graduates
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Is the idea of being in an office for nine to five years boring? On the contrary, do you like to travel and meet new people? If the answer is yes, Hotel Management Diploma Melbourne is definitely a great career option for you. The hospitality industry is one of the most challenging and interesting industries that offers a variety of career opportunities. He manages customer service and ensures that customers get the best experience of their lives. Tourism and hotel management are two important aspects of the hospitality industry. With the rapid globalization, this industry is developing rapidly these days.
It has become a prestigious career and it is the main reason why more and more students are completing their university studies in Diploma of Hospitality Management Australia courses. Under current market conditions, Australia is a profitable destination for any hotel and restaurant chain looking for growth. There are several job opportunities in the national and international market for hotel management graduates.
Some universities offer short-term certificate courses such as Australian Hospitality Diploma Safety Standards for Food and Sanitation, Hotel Administration Analysis of Food Quantity Production and Marketing and merchandising in the hospitality industry. In these courses, the emphasis is more on practical knowledge than on theoretical knowledge, which gives students a competitive edge over others. Students gain skills in food and beverage management, sales and marketing, hospitality, eco-hospitality, hotel information technology, and advanced business studies. Wine. After completing the Melbourne Hospitality Management Diploma, they can work as a food or drink server in any restaurant or bar.
you will find several universities and institutes that offer hotel management courses at bachelor and master levels. A degree in hospitality training in Australia can be used as a steppingstone to enter the hospitality industry. Students can also pursue a postgraduate degree in hospitality which trains them in various hospitality skills required for the job.
The key role of a hotel manager is to oversee the management responsibilities of a resort, hotel, or casino. This means ensuring that the required national regulations are met and, as a result, that customers are satisfied. A satisfied customer is more likely to return if they receive excellent service, which leads to customer loyalty.
Anyone who wants to get into the Diploma of Hospitality Management Melbourne must have a passion for tourism and provide a good experience for tourists. Due to the nature of the industry, hotel management incorporates concepts from similar disciplines such as business administration, retail, and product management and provides chain management. Career opportunities in the hospitality industry are excellent and with the right education almost any hobby is suitable.
It only takes four years or less, if you fast-track a bachelor’s degree, after which you’ll be eligible for higher-paying jobs. Catering law, labour relations, catering management, security, catering management, hotel management, facilities management, marketing and sales. Those who wish to advance to management, general manager, and district hotel manager positions can further their education by earning a master’s or doctoral degree.
Career opportunities in the hospitality industry are excellent and with the Diploma of Hospitality Management Australia education is suitable
The executive hospitality recruitment is done from those elite hospitality institutions only which has got its name imprinted over the world of Diploma of Hospitality Management Sydney course with a few of their students owning many of the business firms in this field. These institutes provide those talented people to the industry. The industry is growing at a sonic speed and the better quality and huge quantity of staffs are required in this field.
But the new recruits can only learn through the process of training on first hand. So the whole unit of the new executive hospitality recruitment are provide d the training under the guidance of one or two for those super specialty staffs who are in charge f the whole industry and looks after the various hospitality training programs that are present for the trainees. After the Hospitality Training in Sydney course is over, the person can join in the firm for the further development in the career or can join some another firm, though by paying off the charges for the training or can do Diploma of hospitality management Australia course.
A quick click will help you to enrol and complete this course in virtually no time at all. The responsible service of alcohol training course will help you to learn all about staff obligations, refusal of service, alcohol impact, and harm minimization techniques. You will be able to handle calm or agitated customers in the safest possible manner with these acquired skills.
for anyone learning Hospitality in the VIT is the responsible service of hospitality training that needs to be approved by the Office of Regulatory Services. This Course will anyway take up only three and a half hours of your time and successful completion will reward you with a nationally recognized statement of attainment that is valid for three years. This course is specific only to the VIT and a short refresher course after three years will allow you to continue rising in your chosen career.
A higher level of hospitality degree like Advanced Diploma of Hospitality Australia allows you to apply for leadership positions in the industry. You can work as a reception manager, restaurant manager, department manager, concierge or event manager. These are responsible positions, which usually work in a team.
Whether you specialize in lodging, meals and drinks or managing leisure activities, prepare for a formal education, such as a hospitality degree. In official training centres you will learn how it works behind the scenes. This includes monitoring and personnel management. Instructors help students improve skills such as team leadership, problem solving and decision making, and customer service management. They are also trained in management, marketing and sales. If you specialize in food and beverages, you will get to know the basics of gastronomy. With this knowledge you can work consistently and safely all these can be covered in Advanced Hospitality Management Australia course
Part of the Advanced Diploma of Hospitality Australia course training takes place in a practical work environment. It can be a restaurant, a hotel, a cafe or a club. This gives you the opportunity to gain practical experience in your area of expertise. A hospitality degree will also improve your job search prospects. Business leaders do not want to spend time or money training employees. They prefer to select trained employees who can contribute to their business when they join.
For getting more information visit here VIT – Victorian Institute of Technology
14/123 Queen St, Melbourne VIC 3000, Australia
1300 17 17 55 (or) [email protected]
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melbournenewsvine · 1 year
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Desperate employers struggle to find workers
“We have three months of backlog work on our more complex mechanical jobs where we cannot find employees with the in-depth knowledge required to complete these jobs,” he said. Virtue said the skill shortage was exacerbated by TAFE and private colleges not preparing apprentices “for what the real life of a mechanic entails.” Xanthe Ba-Pe trainee mechanic at CMR Automotive in Marrickville.attributed to him:Flavio Branclion Master Electricians Australia’s director of advocacy and policy Jason O’Dwyer said the national electricity shortage is expected to worsen after the transition to renewables. He said: “Some employers will not allow their students to receive orders from warehouses to prevent them from being stolen by competitors.” O’Dwyer predicts a shortfall of 25,000 electricians by 2030, with electricians, solar electricians, air conditioning and refrigeration in the toughest positions to fill. loading “We’ve seen employers offer some amazing incentives, like eight days, nine days two weeks, gym memberships, haircuts, and nights with their partner, as well as referral and sign up bonuses, which range from $1,000 to $10,000,” he said. Bars and restaurants also attract workers with cash and other incentives. The Sydney Restaurant Group is offering $5,000 sign-in rewards and free wine courses for managers, waiters, bartenders, baristas, chefs and kitchen staff at venues including Ormeggio at The Spit, Aqua Dining at Milsons Point and Cafe Bondi. Australian Venue Co. offers. Ltd., which operates venues such as The Winery, Bungalow 8 and Cargo, offers paid training, a $100 pub voucher, free lunch and a gift bag for successful “casting calls” applicants in Sydney, Melbourne and Perth. loading Solotel last year began offering login bonuses of up to $1,000 and half price for food and drinks at places like the Opera Bar, Golden Sheaf Hotel and The Bank Newtown to new employees. Elliot Solomon, CEO of Solotel, said the incentive program “contributed significantly” to hiring employees. The hospitality group also introduced a minimum wage increase for eligible employees to July instead of October 1 as requested by the government. Rockpool Bar & Grill Executive Chef, Cory Costello said last year Sun Herald The restaurant was struggling to hire staff despite paying dishwashers $90 an hour on Friday and Saturday nights. loading Restaurant and Restaurant Australia CEO Belinda Clark said hospitality workers are paid “significantly above” regular bonus rates, with junior chefs attracting more than $100,000 a year. “One of my kitchen hands in Western Australia was poached by mines for $150,000 a year as well,” she said. “For baristas, it’s now normal for them to earn about $60 an hour on the weekends.” Clark said employers are offering more training to less experienced people “to make them able to work if they have not worked in the industry before.” But UFL Executive Director Dario Mojkic said hospitality remains an industry where workers are underpaid and poorly treated despite some places offering check-in bonuses and other incentives. “Hospitality employers cannot take jobs because the industry expects workers to work unrelated hours with no job security,” he said. The chief executive of the Australian Retailers Association, Paul Zahraa, said retail employers are offering login bonuses, discounts on products or pay for courses as job vacancies hit a record high of more than 46,000 in August, an increase of 14 per cent from the previous three. months. Fashion brand Nude Lucy is offering a $1,500 login bonus and $1,000 gift voucher as part of its offer to hire an area manager, while last year The Body Shop became one of the first major Australian retailers to adopt an open recruitment process and not ask for a resume. Subject or reference. “Labour shortages have been a problem for some time, even without the Christmas demand surge, as many retailers and small businesses in particular cannot trade at full capacity,” Zahra said. Source link Originally published at Melbourne News Vine
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4 Remodelling Tips for Your Office: Small Changes, Big Impact
A study by the British Council of Offices and Commission for Architecture and the Built Environment on the impact of office design on business performance notes reports of the workplace being responsible for:
●      24% of job satisfaction
●      5% of individual performance
●      11% of team performance
The same study also cites a UK call centre’s staff turnover dropping by 11% after moving to new offices, and a Sydney financial services company’s staff turnover decreasing by 14% after an office refurbishment.
Could installing Betap Vienna floor covering to your office help you accomplish something similar?
The following are minor changes you can implement in your office that can significantly impact employees’ workplace experience. At the very least, these can help improve job satisfaction and individual and team performance, as well as help reduce staff turnover.
In other words, the following measures can potentially improve employee productivity and increase staff retention.
 1.   Change to Carpet Tile Flooring
The importance of focus in an office setting cannot be overemphasised. Employees need to have a single-minded focus on their tasks to be productive. This is hard to achieve, of course, especially in a workplace full of noise and distractions. The average desk employee loses over two hours of work to distractions and interruptions every day.
Therefore, one thing you can do to enhance employee productivity is to reduce such distractions and interruptions. An excellent way to do this is to eschew the open layout for private cubicles.
Barring that, however, one minor change you can implement is to cover your old, scuffed and noisy flooring with carpet.
Wall-to-wall carpeting is the luxurious option, with its extra-plush backing that provides that gloriously soft, foot-sinking sensation. It is, however, a lot more expensive and might be less practical in high-traffic areas. Therefore, instead of wall-to-wall carpeting, why not change your old floor to carpet tiles instead?
Like the Vienna line of carpet tiles by Betap, carpet tiles are ideal in commercial spaces for the following reasons. 
Acoustic Benefits
Carpet tiles have a layered structure that helps them absorb sound. Specifically, they help deaden the sound of footsteps, structural sounds, and all other types of noises, even in high-traffic spaces. 
Design Versatility
You can configure carpet tiles in various ways to create a virtually infinite number of designs. There are solid-colored tiles and patterned tiles. You can go with the default design or shake things up a bit by combining different-colored and different-patterned tiles to create attractive bespoke layouts.
Practicality
Carpet tiles are also more practical than wall-to-wall carpets, especially for high-traffic areas. When one of the carpet tiles is worn out, you can take it out and replace it with a new one. While spot repairs are also possible with wall-to-wall carpets, spot repairing a carpet is more complicated than tile replacement.
 2.   Change to Wallpaper
 The whole ambiance of your office can change with a change in wall colour and design. A simple colour change can uplift your space and make it feel more welcoming instead of drab and lacklustre.
Yes, you can bring about the same change by having your office repainted. However, wallpaper is better if you want additional noise reduction benefits.
 Acoustic wallpaper can provide such benefits. For instance, Texdecor’s acoustical wallcoverings have a sound absorption coefficient of 0.15 to 0.3, which means they can help dampen reverberation and resonance noises that distract and cause discomfort.
The only thing better than acoustic wallpaper in office spaces is soundproofing your walls. However, this might involve ripping the drywall in your existing walls (perhaps even the ceiling) so you can fill the space with fibreglass and insulation. You can just imagine the amount of expense and work this involves.
You can also install acoustic panels instead. This is a less involved process than filling walls and ceilings with insulation material, but it is still more complicated, not to mention costlier than installing acoustic wallpaper.
 3.   Reupholster Your Furniture
Have the seats in your office seen better days? You can get them reupholstered in a different fabric. This will not only give your office a fresh look, but it will also give you the chance to improve the experience of your guests.
There are so many performance fabrics with superior abrasion resistance, lightfastness, colour fastness, and pilling resistance, among so many other wonderful traits. They will elevate the way your sofas look and feel and provide a remarkable change for your office as well.
 4.   Let In More Natural Light
If you can, ‌add more windows to your office. This will amplify the amount of natural light in your office, which will drastically improve your space. Greater exposure to daylight has been known to improve mood and morale, as well as reduce fatigue and eye strain.
If adding windows is too expensive, you can do the next best thing: change your lighting to something that approximates daylight.
 Changes for a Better Workplace
You can increase staff productivity by enrolling your employees in reskilling and upskilling programs.
However, do not neglect the work setting and how it affects how people work. There are minor changes you can implement in your office that can significantly impact people’s productivity and how they feel about their work.
AUTHOR BIO
James Prathap is the General Manager at NGC Nafees, top importers and exporters of wallpapers, flooring and fabric in the Middle East. The business also offers high-quality panoramics, coordinated fabrics, and creative stickers for residential and commercial projects.
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lastsonlost · 3 years
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Monica Young always dreamed of being a teacher despite grim school years
She claims she was bullied, sexually assaulted and ostracised as a teenager
And yet, she went on to sexually assault a 14-year-old three months into teaching
She claims boyfriend at the time was abusive and his family didn't accept her
But he says the allegations are false - and even vows to still 'be there for her'
Monica Young always dreamed of becoming a teacher despite years of classroom bullying, sexual abuse in the playground and struggling with her grades.
And yet, within three months of landing her dream role at an all-boys school in Sydney's southwest, she started to groom and sexually abuse a 'vulnerable' 14-year-old boy.
The 24-year-old was sentenced in the New South Wales District Court on Wednesday after pleading guilty to three counts of aggravated sexual intercourse with a minor.
Throughout the proceedings, the court heard details of her lonely six years of high school, beginning in grade seven when she was sexually assaulted by a peer.
There was little sympathy for the convicted child abuser as she was led to her cell on Wednesday to begin her four year and nine month sentence, but Judge Kate Traill told the court she was given an insight into the root cause of the offending.
Young struck up a relationship with the boy at the school where she was employed as his teacher, groomed him online and eventually encouraged him to have sex with her - on and off campus - on several occasions.
He was too young to give consent and has since told the court the offending ruined his life.
The boy was forced to drop out of school after his peers found out, and his relationship with his brother, parents and extended family has been strained by the proceedings.
The court heard that Young admitted to knowing the feeling. When she was aged 12 and in grade seven, a boy of a similar age sexually assaulted her by pulling her by the ponytail to his crotch area, and holding her face there.
She reported the assault and the boy was subsequently expelled from school.
But her peers, she claims, bullied her incessantly for 'being a snitch' after the assault and the court heard Young struggled to make any friends at school in the years to follow.
One of her only friends came when she was in year 12 and studying for her HSC with dreams of becoming a school teacher.
The friend was a boy two grades younger than her who repeated year 10 because he struggled academically. He sought her out and what begun as a tutoring dynamic developed into a close friendship.
Eventually the duo became involved romantically, but his traditional Lebanese, Muslim family never approved.
Young agreed to a bureaucratic conversion to Islam in an attempt to gain their trust and with that came concessions for the relationship. She was able to begin sleeping in the same room as her partner and travelling away on holidays together.
They later got engaged and Young was again on the outer with his family, the court heard.
A traditional Islamic ceremony took place, but the court heard the union is not recognised in Australian law.
Young's lawyer claims the relationship soured when her partner began cheating on her, took control of her finances, isolated her from friends and family and 'became abusive'.
He denies the allegations, telling Daily Mail Australia he has 'the utmost respect for women' and only ever treated Young the same way he would want his mother or sister to be treated in a relationship.
Despite the serious claims levelled against him, Young's ex maintains he will continue to offer her support even while behind bars - and despite the fact that she is now single.
But he won't be paying her a visit any time soon, acknowledging inmates get little time to accept visitors and that her immediate family deserve priority access to her.
The court previously heard that Young was not particularly bright, exemplified by her Higher School Certificate ATAR score of just 44.
That mark is just 14 points shy of a 'mystery mark' - a black dot which is generally issued on the testamurs of students who score 30 or below.
Most teaching degrees in Australia have a minimum ATAR acceptance ranking of about 65, but schools have been known to accept lower scores in recent years.
Young's lawyer, Margaret Cunneen SC, previously told the court she would not be considered a 'mature person' for somebody her age and struggled to develop both academically and socially.
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Read the raunchy texts Young sent her victim begging for sordid hook-ups before having sex with the boy in the school's stairwell - and even a classroom while the rest of the year nine class watched DISNEY
Young initiated contact with the boy on Snapchat, sending him a message which asked him to 'send pics' in exchange for provocative photos of herself, the NSW District Court's agreed set of facts reveal.
She would also FaceTime the year nine student as she performed sex acts on herself.
Young struck up a relationship with a boy who she taught six times a fortnight in geography, PDHPE and science when they began communicating closely because of the Covid lockdown which shut the school.
On one occasion, she messaged him asking him to hug her at school the next day, and when he didn't, she sent a follow up accusing him of 'not having the balls'.
The dare became a frequent tactic Young used to convince the boy to lure the boy into sexual liaisons.
On another occasion, she sent a message which read: 'It's dangerous if we get caught, but if you do it it'll be worth it'.
The duo exchanged messages about the sex acts they wanted to perform on each other, with Young initiated the 'sexting' on several occasions.
The most brazen of her offending occurred inside the school's classrooms, once where she messaged her victim to meet him in an English room to perform a sex act on him, and a second time where she groped the boy at the back of the classroom while the rest of the year nine class watched Disney movie, WALL-E.
During the movie, a friend of the boy even sat on the other side of him as the sex act took place.
The victim was also encouraged to lie about his whereabouts, telling his mother on one occasion he stayed back late at school to get help on an assignment, and even skipped afternoon classes to spend time with Young.
On the last day of school, the duo met on the staircase at 3.20pm to kiss goodbye, and Young performed oral sex on the 14-year-old.
She then returned to the staff room, the statement of facts read.
When she finally landed her first job at an all boys high school in Sydney's southwest, she was a new graduate specialising in PDHPE, a coveted role among teachers.
Instead, she was assigned 23 geography classes, with a smattering of science and PDHPE classes.
When she took to the stand during her sentencing hearing two weeks ago, she admitted to being overwhelmed by the workload.
Young didn't want to admit she was struggling and ask for help, so she did her best to stay one page ahead of her students by studying the textbooks and teachers' notes each night before class.
Within three weeks, the Covid pandemic closed the schools and Young, along with all of her students, was forced online.
It was during this time that the line between student and teacher was 'criminally blurred', and after years of struggling to bond with people her own age, Young claims she befriended her victim.
But there was no 'friendship'. The boy admitted in a victim impact statement supplied to the court that he never expected Young could hurt him and that he learned to trust her.
To him, she was the 'cool' teacher.
She sought him out on Snapchat and the relationship progressed from there. At one point, there was a group chat between Young, the victim and his friend, the court heard.
They had sex on multiple occasions between June 24 and July 6 2020, including at least twice on the school's grounds and once in her car at a local park.
On one occasion, she messaged him asking him to hug her at school the next day, and when he didn't, she sent a follow up accusing him of 'not having the balls'.
The dare became a frequent tactic Young used to convince the boy to lure the boy into sexual liaisons.
Teenage sexual abuse victim reveals how his life was 'ruined'
In a victim impact statement read to the court, the boy described how his relationship with his brother, parents, only friend and cousin deteriorated when they found out about his relationship with Young.
The boy said he 'feels like a failure who let his entire family down' and has only recently realised the extent of the abuse.
'He says the offender has ruined his dreams… ruined his school and his relationship with his family and friends and trust in others and ruined his life,' Judge Traill said.
The court heard the boy constantly hears his parents bicker and blame each other for not noticing the abuse sooner.
His brother 'hates him for embarrassing him in front of his friends at school' and the victim says he can no longer go on family holidays due to a strained relationship with extended family.
The victim never returned to the school he once loved because all of his peers were aware of the court case, and he is now enrolled at TAFE, despite once having aspirations of becoming a physiotherapist.
'He struggles to smile about anything anymore,' the court heard.
On another occasion, she sent a message which read: 'It's dangerous if we get caught, but if you do it it'll be worth it'.
The duo exchanged messages about the sex acts they wanted to perform on each other, with Young initiated the 'sexting' on several occasions.
The most brazen of her offending occurred inside the school's classrooms, once where she messaged her victim to meet him in an English room to perform a sex act on him, and a second time where she groped the boy at the back of the classroom while the rest of the year nine class watched Disney movie, WALL-E.
During the movie, a friend of the boy even sat on the other side of him as the sex act took place.
On the last day of school, the duo met on the staircase at 3.20pm to kiss goodbye, and Young performed oral sex on the 14-year-old.
At the beginning of her sentencing hearing, she tearfully told the court: 'I just never imagined I'd be one of those people… I've never been in trouble with the law. I hope he and his family can forgive me.
'I was foolish.'
She wrote an apologetic letter to the victim and his family in which she said she regrets letting the relationship progress and understands that both her victim and his family will carry the trauma of the offence 'for the rest of their lives'.
'I knew it was wrong, I knew my actions were inappropriate but I couldn't let myself believe it,' she said. 'He trusted me and I abused that trust.'
On Wednesday, the court agreed.
Judge Kate Traill described her offending as a 'violation of trust' before delivering her sentence. Young will be eligible for parole on October 31st, 2023.
'[You] exploited his vulnerability and manipulated him,' Judge Traill said.
Young was ultimately sentenced to four years and nine months' custody, but with time served she will be eligible for parole in a little more than two years.
She will never be employed as a teacher again, and Judge Traill acknowledged she would need to be reintegrated into the community and her life post-sentence.
'But for these very serious offences she is a very impressive young lady… she was in a very bad relationship and made very bad decisions,' Judge Traill said.
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kenrik · 3 years
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someone’s so excited to share this... 👀👀
gotta write it first though. urgh, writing is like watching a movie. it’s so addictive. omg 👀
at the rate i’m narrating the story, it’ll be a long oneshot.  👀 👀
always had this image of Gojo AU as a sushi chef. urgh!! for the longest time. an image of GoUta in his sushi bar.  👀 👀 👀 never had enough feels to write until now.  👀 👀 omg i’m so excited to see how this story unfolds.  👀 👀
-
No title yet.
Modern AU. Gojo is a sushi chef who runs his own sushi bar. Utahime is a new customer.
Since Gojo was a child, he knew he could do anything should he wish it. He had all the tools he needed to succeed in life after all. He had the looks, the money and the brains.
At the age of twenty-five, he's done basically everything he set his mind to.
Go backpacking around Europe? Check.
Graduate first in his year? Check.
Win the love of the most beautiful woman he'll ever set his eyes on? Check.
He could do anything. He could do it all.
So, when some idiot in a bar started laughing at him, telling him he's done nothing much really; that he's just done what was expected from someone like him - he's got the degree, he's landed that dream job, he's slept with the most gorgeous women - so what?
Have you ever tried skilled labor? Have you ever accomplished a quiet, humble job?
You haven't!
You're just full of it. The moron laughed.
Yeah? What stupid job are you yapping on about? He'd sneer and ask the inebriated man.
Farming, for instance? Growing your own crop with pride. You'll surely fail on that. You have no patience.
How about being a sushi chef? You won't even last a day training to be one. You'd combust just with washing rice alone!
You're just all talk. You're nothing great, Satoru. So, just shut up already. The shameless, drunk idiot; also his moron best friend he guessed, told him before passing out after his seventh beer.
Spitefully, Gojo left him at the bar that night. And when they meet the next day, Suguru gave him a good jab and yelled about how he woke up to an empty, dark pub; locked inside. Even the moron barkeep didn't bother waking him up and the other fools passed out in the room.  
Gojo just ignores him and tells him instead, I did it.
Huh? Suguru narrowed his eyes at him.
Starting Monday, I'm training to be a sushi chef. Gojo laughs.
And Suguru loses all the blood from his face.
WHAT?!
It's been three years since then. He's done every grit work he had to do. He didn't skip jobs. He didn't overstep his seniors. He did it the proper way. He respected his elders.
And when he invites Suguru to the opening of his very own sushi restaurant, he revels at the stunned disbelief on his friend's face.
So, you'll be a sushi chef now? You'll be a sushi chef your entire life?
Suguru narrows his eyes at him. His impulsive best friend went to school to be a economist for crying out loud. They had comfy wall street jobs. They flew back and forth from Dubai, Sydney, everywhere, in first class.
What the hell was wrong with Satoru? Why couldn't he just let even the simplest argument go?
I guess.
Gojo shrugs at Suguru. And he leaves it like that and goes out to greet the waiting line of excited customers with their phones out, buzzing about this hot new sushi bar and its hot young chef from the Gojo family.
His small sushi bar was filled with people that day. There were students, salarymen and women, influencers and a giant tuna fresh from the market displayed up center on the counter.
And as Gojo served his guests, as he and his staff tended to the happy, waiting crowd; he laughs and thinks of how Suguru was wrong.
He didn't become a sushi chef just to prove him he could.
He became one because he wanted to be a sushi chef.
He didn't disrespect their professors and his family elders just to mess with them.
He openly called them out because they were backward-thinking imbeciles.
And he didn't get a degree in economics to land a comfy wall street job.
He got a degree in economics to understand how the market worked, how the economy worked, how everything came together.
He didn't do what he did just because he could.
He was genuinely interested to learn and understand the passion of the people around him. He understood he was young. He understood what seniority meant. And in the world of making sushi, the hierarchy made sense to him.
So, he worked. He bowed his head down. And now, he was a sushi chef.
-
will share more/update this as i write. 
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girlactionfigure · 3 years
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She was alone when she died on February 7, 1965. She was 50 years old.
Before the incident happened, she had been a successful businesswoman. But after the incident, in which she suffered physical injury, humiliation, and injustice, the personal and professional repercussions were just too much. Her marriage ended, she had to close her business and move out of the city, then out of the country. 
And, even after her death, just this past October 2020, a sign at the cemetery giving directions to her head stone was vandalized with  “highly offensive racial slurs”, according to the Halifax Police.
What did she do “wrong”?
Like Rosa Parks, she refused to give up her seat . . . but at a movie theatre.
At a movie theatre in New Glasgow, Nova Scotia, a white ticket-seller told her “I’m not permitted to sell downstairs tickets to you people.” Desmond then refused to move to the segregated section of the movie theatre for black patrons.
She was dragged out of the theatre by police, arrested, thrown in jail for 12 hours and fined. 
She is called “Canada’s Rosa Parks,” although the theatre incident occurred nine years before Parks refused to give up her seat on a city bus to a white passenger in the United States.
Her name is Viola Desmond, now a civil rights icon in Canada, who confronted the racism that Black Nova Scotians routinely faced and  brought nationwide attention to the African Nova Scotian community��s struggle for equal rights. 
This is part of an ongoing series on the Peace Page for Black History Month.
“Viola Desmond was born in 1914, the daughter of a middle-class mixed-race family in Halifax,” according to Parcs Canada. “When Desmond graduated from high school she worked as a teacher in Black schools, one of very few employment avenues open to her. Black women in Nova Scotia were restricted from going to beauty salons and studying beauty culture (hair-styling, cosmetics, or wig making), so Desmond attended schools in Montréal and New York. When she obtained her diplomas she opened a salon and eventually a beauty school beside her [husband]’s barbershop in Halifax. As an entrepreneur, she achieved financial independence and became a role model to African-Canadian women through the success of her enterprises, which included skin and hair care products for Black women that had previously been unavailable to Nova Scotians.
“In November of 1946, Viola Desmond was travelling on business from Halifax to Sydney, Nova Scotia, when car trouble obliged her to stop overnight in New Glasgow. She attended a local movie theatre where she encountered segregated seating rules.”
“To be a black entrepreneur was ground-breaking,” Henderson Paris, a  New Glasgow town councillor and founder of the Run Against Racism, said in 2015.
“She was building her business and through this – this incident unfolded. Being the strong woman she was – she wasn’t standing for it. It was not right, and something needed to be done.”
Desmond was no stranger to systemic racism, according to Amanda Coletta of the Washington Post. When she left her teaching job to launch a career as a beautician, Desmond was forced to travel out of the province for training because beauty schools in Nova Scotia barred black people from enrolling.
“Canada had no Jim Crow-like laws, but it did have policies that enforced segregation,” said Constance Backhouse, a law professor at the University of Ottawa who has written extensively on Desmond.
The policies were “just as bad as Jim Crow,” Backhouse said, but they were written in a way that “masked” their racist intent.
Desmond was unaware that the Roseland Theatre was segregated, according to the Canadian Museum for Human Rights.
“The segregated movie theatre relegated black patrons to the balcony at the time, while floor seating was reserved for whites,” according to Global News Canada. 
“Desmond was shortsighted and needed a better view, and tried to buy a floor seat, but was refused because she was black. She then bought a balcony seat (which was one cent cheaper) but sat in the floor area – until theatre staff called the police and had her dragged out,” according to The Globe and Mail.
She “was charged with tax evasion for failing to pay 1 cent — the price difference between the floor and balcony seats,” wrote the Washington Post. “Despite the theater’s refusal to sell her the more expensive floor seat, she was convicted and fined $26.”
Let us emphasize that again:
“She was charged and convicted of tax evasion – over a single penny,” wrote The Globe and Mail. “She did not have a lawyer at trial – she was never informed she was entitled to one.” 
“Her arrest and conviction on spurious charges . . . concealed racial discrimination behind the arrest,” according to Parcs Canada.
“Protests from Nova Scotia’s black community and an appeal to the provincial Supreme Court proved fruitless,” according to The Globe and Mail.
“Now a symbol of the struggle for equal rights, Viola Desmond’s defiance in the face of injustice became a rallying cry for Black Nova Scotians and Canadians determined to end racial discrimination,” according to Parcs Canada.
Desmond’s defiance spurred a broader fight for racial equality that helped end segregation in the province,” wrote Coletta.
She died in 1965 without any acknowledgment of racial discrimination in her case, according to The Globe and Mail.
“It would take 63 years for Nova Scotia to issue Desmond . . . a posthumous apology and pardon,” according to Global News Canada.
“In 2010, Nova Scotia gave her a free pardon – and the black lieutenant-governor signed it into law. “Here I am, 64 years later – a black woman giving freedom to another black woman,” Mayann Francis recalled in a 2014 profile about the pardon, which called Ms. Desmond’s case a miscarriage of justice and said she should never have been charged. “I believe she has to know that she is now free.”
Desmond’s story went largely untold for a half-century, but in recent years she has been featured on a stamp, and her name graces a Halifax harbour ferry.
“More than 53 years after her death, Desmond [also] became the first black person and the first woman other than a royal to appear on the front of a regularly circulating Canadian bank note, replacing Sir John A. Macdonald, Canada’s first prime minister, as the face of the new vertically oriented $10 bill,” according to the Washington Post.
“She was an everyday person... this tiny little woman, it’s such an example of strength and determination and education and dignity, respect that was this whole little woman,” Desmond’s sister, Wanda Robson told the Cape Breton Post ahead of the first Nova Scotia Heritage Day in 2015, which honoured Desmond. Robson is the author of “Sister to Courage: Stories from the World of Viola Desmond, Canada’s Rosa Parks.”
“She laid the foundation in regards to justice and how black people were being treated in Nova Scotia. Even though it happened in New Glasgow, similar incidents were happening all over the province,” said Crystal States, an educator with the Black Educators Association and the representative for the African Nova Scotian North Central Network told The News in 2015.
“It was a breakthrough in social justice that had predated the civil rights movement in the (United) States,” States said ahead of the first Nova Scotia Heritage Day, which honored Desmond.
"At the end of the day, we're all just human beings," her sister Wanda Robson said. "We're just people. There are people with different colours, different skin shades, different hair, but at the end of the day, as I said, we are just people."
Update: 
This past week, Novia Scotia issued a check to refund Desmond’s family in a symbolic gesture after 11th grade student Varishini Deochand wrote to Nova Scotia Premier Stephen McNeil asking that the province repay the court costs handed to Viola Desmond.
The court costs of $26 would amount to an estimated $368.29 by today's standards, but the province has since increased the award amount to $1,000, which was given to Desmond's only surviving family member, Wanda Robson, who chose to donate the money to a one-time scholarship at her alma mater, Cape Breton University.
"I strongly hold that one should not pay a fine for a crime they did not commit," Deochand said during a virtual ceremony. 
"While we may not be able to travel back in time to right our wrongs, we can show that we care in the most sincerest of ways."
~ jsr
The Jon S. Randal Peace Page
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boggirlsummer · 3 years
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Wet Hot American Summer
August 18 Zoey and I thought we fixed the leak in my tent but we were wrong. I spent the early morning inching away from a puddle that finally pushed me out around 8 am - time to get up anyway. Too rainy to cook or make coffee and I left camp aimlessly. I could barely see anything through the smoke and clouds which threw a wrench in my non-plan to drive around and take photos out the car window. Grand Tetons and Montana and Wyoming were up there on my teenage bucket list (lmao, dream big!), mostly for the landscapes and western vibes and maybe a few cathartic renditions of Wide Open Spaces. I just hiked all summer so I feel like I earned a few days of all-american automobile tourism.
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Cozy
Decision fatigue is a ball buster on solo trips (and in life) and sometimes I refuse to change course even when it’s clear that a plan isn’t going to work out. I drove around Tetons alternately listening to the directions and making random navigational decisions, so Google kept yelling at me to make a u-turn. Eventually I got annoyed with both of us and stopped for snacks at the general store. I’ve been making my way through all the kettle chip flavors and so far honey dijon is the best and korean bbq is the worst.
Drove straight through to Yellowstone hoping the storm would let up, but by the time I got there it was 50 degrees with rain expected all afternoon. I thought it would be SUMMER once I left the Bay Area, so all my sweaters and warm jackets are in vacuum sealed bags that I don’t have the space in my car to open. I wasn’t loving the idea of being wet and cold in Yellowstone all night so I talked the campground lady into refunding my site reservation and headed for Big Sky, Montana.
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I felt bad leaving without seeing any of the Yellowstone sights so I stopped at Old Faithful on my way out. I knew laughably little about what I was looking at and when a bunch of people started gathering I thought to myself, is this thing gonna explode or something?? And ya turns out that’s the entire point, it shoots a bunch of water and steam into the air every few minutes. I bought a cup of coffee and watched halfheartedly. The only other attraction I know about is the rainbow glory hole and there was so much traffic to park in the lot I said screw it and went on to Montana.
No LTE between Yellowstone and Big Sky and I was without a place to sleep - luckily my sister was available to do some emergency concierge work for me. I eventually found a nice campground near town but the obscene number of bear country warning signs freaked me out. I backtracked to Big Sky to buy a $50 can of bear spray, what a rip. Feeling beat today so I made it up to myself with a bowl of chicken curry ramen and a Sapporo. It was no nugget curry, but it did the job ☺️
Reading the bear spray instructions before bed - you’re supposed to use it once a charging bear is two to three seconds from reaching you. Wtf. I can’t do anything in two seconds. Finished Year of the Monkey at last. Almost fell asleep with a candy wrapper in my pocket, instant death. Also I got my period and I’m worried this is going to attract the bears.
August 19 I broke my own rule. I drove to Bozeman this morning and had a chicken fried steak at the Western Cafe, “The Last Best Cafe.” I had a nice chat with two old guys at the bar, initiated by ME! We talked about my trip so far and books (I was reading Walden Two and one of the guys had Woman in the Window with him, and we agreed that both authors are pretty nuts). Good time all around and then one of them secretly bought my breakfast 🥰 I’ve only ever had creepy men buy me drinks at bars so free CFS with no strings attached was a revelation. My smile lit up the cold dark streets of Bozeman.
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Too early for hostel check-in so I killed some time hanging out in a coffee shop and wandering around Main Street. When I’m alone in a new city I usually get on the apps, it’s fun to hang out with a real LOCAL and have an AUTHENTIC experience. I did this on my first night in Sydney last year and my date won $7,000 at a bar raffle he’d been going to every week for three years and then bought us a night’s worth of top shelf shots, bad coke, and dumplings. Obviously I was his good luck charm so I should’ve gotten a cut of that $$$ but whatever… Eventually we went back to his depressing loft outside of the city. It was barely furnished and full of his shitty art and luckily he didn’t have any condoms so I was able to decline sex without feeling guilty (I had condoms of course but didn’t disclose). He tried to fuck me again around 4 am and I was so confused I thought he must have found a condom while I was briefly sleeping. He had not. I snuck out at 6 am and caught the bus back to the city. Not the most restful night but nice to get away from the hostel for a little while. But ya I updated my Hinge location to Bozeman and got hella conservative men swiping on me 🥴 My profile isn’t anything crazy but I don’t think I’m giving off Megyn Kelly vibes. Are they playing some sort of sexual bingo? Are they out to stealth me? Seems sus.
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If you are a man on Hinge with a naked photo on your profile I WILL screenshot it and I WILL make a collage of my collection once I have enough material and I WILL sell it as a NFT and I WILL make $0 cuz y’all are freaks. This is the tamest one I’ve got, text me if you want a photo of a naked man covering his junk with a pineapple.
Ooooieee hostel is grungy and subterranean and not the kinda place you want to spend many conscious hours in. I took myself to the movies to escape - another thing I really missed last year. I saw The Night House, which I would describe as an architectural horror? I’ve been thinking about architecture a lot lately, this cool site Zoey sent me has some interesting interviews and stuff. In the movies I ate an entire bag of sour gummy worms and a box of junior mints.
Had a freaky bookstore experience earlier today, not the first time this summer. I originally wrote a longgg paragraph about synchronicity here but I got self conscious and started wondering if hearing other people’s stories about synchronicity is like listening to them talk about their dreams. I personally love talking about dreams (call me and tell me about your crazy dreams!!) but things definitely get lost in translation and sometimes they’re straight boring (like when my old coworkers and I used to dream in Excel, fucckkk). So I get why people find it annoying and here at Bog Girl Summer we can’t afford to alienate any of our readers. All I will say is that I walked into a bookstore today with synchronicity very much on my mind, went to the psychology section to buy a baby Jung text, and there saw a literal sign that said “Staff Pick, Introductory Jung: Synchronicity.” So yes, I bought it. Don’t forget y’all - I have a psychology degree so please don’t come after me about confirmation bias and all that lol. It’s very possible that in this summer of upheaval I’m desperate for some kinda sign that I’m on the right path. Let me have this one 😘
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I also bought this postcard which spoke to me because most days I feel like I’m trying to drink out of a firehose
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evie568 · 3 years
Text
Work in progress
♫ ♪ Spotify playlist : Ella changed the Name — Previously named : Cut ; by eviewivi
Date of creation : December 2017 — 3h6m
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Let’s start from the beginning.
— —
· Who am I?
My name is Evie.
It was not my given name. I chose it myself. I always wanted a long name, like “Isabella” or “Elisabeth”, but I was given Eve. So I decided to add another letter to it to make it longer (age 4/5).
Some of my diplomas say “Evie”, and others say “Eve”. My passport says “Eve” whereas my social insurance card says “Evie”.
It’s a bit of a mess.
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— —
I was born in 1995, in London and moved to the South of France with my family (age 8).
My parents are both English (although they enjoy saying they’re French since they have duel nationality now). I have 2 older sisters and 1 older brother.
At the age of 8, I remember that I could count up to 30 in French and say “Bonjour”. That was about it. I was put in a French school straight away and it was scary at first.
— —
Learning to speak French came naturally as I was young. The grammar was a little harder, and I still have difficulty with it today.
I actually have difficulty in English too. I often make mistakes.
Being born in one country and moving to another can sometimes be confusing.
“Are you French?” Not really…
“English?” Neither…
“So what are you?” Good question.
You often get asked the same questions.
“Do you think in English or French?”
“Do you dream in English or French?”
“Do you prefer England or France?”
I don’t mind it though, they find it interesting.
— —
· What happed?
This is a difficult question. I’m not too sure as I am still discovering things everyday.
I am not writing this, cured from my mental illness. I am writing this, still going through tough times, trying to get better everyday.
I am writing this as a sort of therapy, to help myself and maybe others.
To understand myself better, for family and friends to understand me better and maybe for people to relate to.
Writing has never been my strong point but whether you are good at it or not, I do find it helps. You get to express yourself freely, like dancing, or painting or creating music… any form of art really.
— —
So back to the question : what happened?
In 2018, I was diagnosed with a mental illness I had never heard of before in my life : Borderline Personality Disorder.
— —
· How did this all start?
After finishing a Sound Engineering course back in 2015 (Montpellier, FR), I went back home to my parents house to look for a job in the music industry.
It was very hard to find a job with no work experience at all. It was a catch 22 situation : I needed a job to gain experience but couldn’t get a job without any prior experience.
I would end up playing The Sims everyday in my one piece pajamas. Drinking Desperados in the evening while dreaming of moving to Sydney.
My parents quickly noticed I was not being very productive, and gave me a speech.
I would often check Facebook and see my best friend at the time, having the time of her life as an Au Pair in London.
I was jealous.
— —
In October 2015, I took a plane to London to become an Au Pair.
I was an Au Pair for about 2 years in London, and it was so much fun.
I made friends with other Au Pairs from all over the world that were so lovely. We would go out to bars, concerts, parks, museums, festivals and so much more.
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— —
Then I met Julien.
This part is difficult to write about as it is still very painful and I have forgotten a lot.
My therapist told me it’s hard to remember what hurt you so much. I find that to be true in this situation, but I’ll try my best.
— —
I’ve never had a boyfriend in my life. And I was 22 years old.
My brother created an online profile for me on a website called OKCupid. He told me that it wasn’t just for dating, but you could also make friends.
I met Julien on OKCupid. His username was “JulienB26” (his last name started with a B and he was 26… I know, very creative…). Mine was “BurnTogether” (the name of a music album I was OBSESSED with at the time)
He was not my type at all, but sent me the sweetest, most personal message I had ever received, so I thought “why not?”
We met in a rock bar in Camden Town called The Worlds End, and it was fun. We got on straight away and it was my best first date ever.
Long story short we ended up dating.
After only about a month, I left my Au Pair family and moved in with him in Notting Hill. He met my family and I met his.
My parents adored him! He seemed so perfect. He was cultured, dressed nicely, polite, had a good job, a nice and tidy apartment…
He wasn’t that perfect though.
— —
He smoked a lot of weed, was addicted to online video games and extremely jealous.
I remember one time when I was typing to my friend at the time, he snatched my phone out of my hands to see what I was writing. It was quite aggressive and I did not like it at all.
— —
My Au Pair friend Pri invited me one day to spend time with her and our new Au Pair friend to go out to pubs near London Bridge.
I refused, as Julien didn’t want me to go. He didn’t like Pri.
We (Julien and I) went to the rock bar we first met at instead. It was not fun. We didn’t have much left in common.
I felt the relationship slowly dying and there was a lot about him I did not like anymore. But breaking up with him was not an option.
I got drunk. I often drank. I liked it so much and would drink too much, too often.
The following day I saw about 5 to 10 messages from my friend Pri.
There was a terrorist attack that very same night at London Bridge.
She managed to escape but unfortunately our Au Pair friend, did not.
— —
Pri asked me to spend the day with her, the day we found out that our friend had passed away and, of course, I went.
We drank wine together and cried.
She didn’t want to spend the night alone and asked me if I could stay with her.
I agreed and asked Julien if it was okay with him. But it was not.
It was a problem for him and he refused.
I left.
— —
Julien had been acting strange for a couple of days.
I didn’t really know what to do and didn’t want to be egocentric and assume it was because of me, but I did.
Maybe he was thinking about his father who passed away?
I didn’t know, and he wasn’t telling me anything.
— —
One day, as I came home from babysitting, and had enough. I needed to know what was wrong.
He put down his joint, told his online friends on Discord that he needed to leave and turned around from his computer to face me.
— —
This part is very hard to remember.
He told me I didn’t deserve his love as he couldn’t love me to the fullest.
He wasn’t sure whether or not he wanted to end things and needed some time to think.
Our age difference was a problem for him. He thought we were in two different phases of our life.
— —
I didn’t sleep that night.
I watched Netflix and cried until I saw the sun rise.
The next following days were difficult. It was the same pattern everyday.
I woke up sad, left for work angry, came back confused and went to sleep sad.
I didn’t deserve this.
No one deserves being with someone who isn’t sure they love them and needs time to think.
So I decided to leave.
I took a train to Paris and never came back.
— —
My brother who studied art in Paris, decided to spend a year of his education in Bergen, Norway. So he had an un-used flat in Paris for a year.
I asked my parents if I could stay in the flat while looking for a job in Paris.
They agreed.
— —
I felt fresh, like a new chapter of my life was starting. I didn’t know anyone (besides my brothers friends, Julie and Yolo).
I bought healthy, organic, vegan food and bought a membership to a gym that I would go to everyday for an hour.
Things were looking good. I felt positive.
— —
I quickly found a part-time job as a receptionist for a company involved in cryptocurrency.
It was so much fun.
I loved saying hello to all the staff that walked passed my desk in the morning.
My life was good, and it got even better.
— —
I went to the company’s seminar in a grand chateau outside of Paris.
One evening, we had special places to sit for dinner. It was a way of mixing all different employees from different services to connect.
I was sat at a table with one of the Vice Presidents of the company.
He was very kind and asked me what I do outside of work and what I would like to do in the future.
I had a couple of Desperados and told him that I originally wanted to join a company in the music industry and work my way up, but since working for the company, I had fallen in love with the it and would actually like to work my way up in this company.
This was not a sneaky plan or anything. I’m not that smart.
Fortunately though, the President of the company heard my tipsy conversation and called me over.
He asked me if what I said was true. I was astonished he knew my name!
— —
About two weeks after the seminar, the Vice President of Sales approached me asking if we could have a chat.
He had heard from the President that I wanted to join the company and offered me a position in the Sales department.
I had no experience whatsoever in sales, but accepted with great pleasure.
— —
My personal life on the other hand was not going so well.
I was drinking a lot and started cutting myself with broken glass as a punishment for drinking.
But I didn’t tell anyone or do anything about it as I felt in control of the situation.
I was on OKCupid again but comparing every profile to Julien.
In the spring of whatever year it was (2018 maybe?), I went back to London to see Julien as he had some of my belongings to give back to me.
We talked and walked in Hyde Park for about two hours. I wore his favorite dress.
I told him about my amazing new job and friends I had made. I was subtly bragging about my life. I wanted him to regret letting me go. And he did. He cried so much and felt very regretful. I felt happy even though I was suffering inside.
Towards the end of the walk he told me he was seeing someone new.
I did not expect that. I was shocked.
— —
I remember taking the underground back, and crying like I have never cried before while listening to Taylor Swift.
I felt that something inside of me had changed. Something bad.
— —
After returning back to Paris things got worse. I was drinking more and cutting deeper and more often.
Julien was still texting me at the time and I was not responding as I wanted to cut the cord with him.
He didn’t understand why and I remember telling him that I had never felt this bad in my life. I had never hated myself so much and needed space.
He told me that I needed to seek professional help.
I said goodbye and blocked him.
— —
On the day of Gay Pride 2018 in Paris.
I was drinking alone.
I didn’t eat anything that day and drank a bottle of white wine alone in my flat.
I remember grabbing a glass and smashing it on the floor, collecting the sharpest piece of glass I could find and cutting and cutting and cutting.
My friend Yolo came over and saw the pieces if glass all over the kitchen floor and saw me on the floor crying and bleeding.
She called an Uber and took me to a psychiatric hospital.
I was so desperate for help that I would have gone anywhere she took me.
We had to stop the Uber half way there so I could throw up and then continue on our route.
— —
Once there I remember talking to a professional, crying, about suicidal thoughts I had.
I remember doing a lot of research at the time and discovered a website.
It had all the information I was looking for on it.
I spent a night at the hospital Saint Anne to sober up.
The following day, they let me go.
— —
Even though things were bad, I still felt 100% in control of the situation.
I would self harm and drink almost daily.
I continued doing research about suicide and the sharpest object known to man.
One day I decided to order a pack of scalpels off of Amazon. They arrived quickly.
I was so eager to try them but had to go to work that day. So I just did a small cut on my arm and wow.
I didn’t press hard at all but bled. It was so satisfying at the time.
— —
On my friend Julie’s birthday I remember coming home from work, going to the closest shop to my flat and buying two 50cl cans of Desperados. I could tell the cashier was judging me, but I did not care much.
I put on a stand up comedy show on Netflix and proceeded to drink the beer.
Then I remembered the scalpels in my bedside draw.
I had promised myself not to self-harm anymore before the summer holidays as I would be around my family in t-shirts and shorts.
But I wanted to so badly. So I did.
I said to myself that it would be just one cut on my thigh. But it had to be satisfying enough.
So I cut my thigh.
— —
I forgot that it was a scalpel and in my mind it was just a piece of broken glass.
Big mistake.
I cut too deep.
I remember seeing the white fat through the cut in my thigh.
It didn’t hurt though.
Then the blood started to flow. There was so much.
I tried to close the cut with my hands, but blood got everywhere.
I panicked.
I didn’t want to disturbed Julie on her birthday so I phoned her boyfriend (who was also my work colleague).
He calmed me down and phoned the emergencies who arrived very quickly.
— —
I went to the hospital and had to have ten stitches in my thigh.
They also made me speak to a therapist there who told me I could go home.
So I went home.
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— —
I was seeing a psychiatrist for a while (since the Gay Pride event)
That told me after the 10 stitches incident that I was depressed.
I still remember the feeling of her telling me I was depressed. I was shocked and didn’t want to believe her.
I had everything under control!
She suggested I take antidepressants and I accepted. Paroxetine 10mg
— —
I worked for the company for about a year.
It was amazing.
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I traveled to Berlin and London. I also attended a “Blockchain Cruise” from Barcelona to Monaco to Ibiza.
I could bring whomever I wanted from the company.
I chose Jacques.
He seemed nice.
— —
On the cruise, there was a party going on and of course, we both attended it. I was a little bit tipsy and kissed a guy on the dance floor.
I remember seeing Jacques really angry and went over to talk to him.
We were talking near the main bar on the boat.
He seemed very drunk.
He tried to kiss me but I pushed him away.
He tried again and I had to push harder.
Someone felt the need to intervene and asked me if I needed help.
I told them that everything was okay and walked Jacques back to the room.
— —
After the trip I wanted to forget that side I saw of Jacques.
So I did.
I wanted to be his friend and he wanted to be mine.
— —
One evening we were having drinks with work colleagues in a whiskey bar.
I asked Jacques, as a friend, if he wanted to spend the night at my flat.
I felt very lonely and was a bit tipsy.
I didn’t want anything to happen between us, but I understand now how he thought differently.
— —
As we were going to bed, he tried again, like on the cruise to kiss me.
I pushed him away but he was stronger.
He then proceeded to take my pajama trousers off.
I pulled them back up. He pulled them back down.
I remember his fingers inside of me. I tried pushing him off of me but he grabbed my wrists.
He then, finally, saw that I was not happy.
So thankfully, he stopped.
I pulled my trousers back up and stayed in a foetus position until I fell asleep.
— —
The next morning we walked to work together.
I didn’t feel right. Something about that night felt wrong.
I phoned Julie and told her what had happened. She was in Greece at the time.
I sent an email to my boss telling him that I didn’t feel well and asking him if I could have the day off.
He accepted and I left with my friend Yolo who met me at work.
— —
We had a lovely day. We went to the cinema, went and got massages, and later on that evening, we were at a café and my friend Julie appeared out of nowhere!
She had taken an early plane back from Greece to come and see me.
I was so happy to see her!
— —
The next week, at the end of the day at work, round 7pm, my boss asked if he could talk to me.
He told me that the President of the company had heard that I slept with a married colleague.
This has never happened and I has shocked and embarrassed.
I told him this information was not true and he believed me.
He told me to tell him if anything ever happens between me and a colleague.
I felt the need to tell him that Jacques took advantage to me. And I did.
My voice was shacking. He was angry.
After our chat, I left and went home.
— —
I don’t remember this part very well but I remember going to see my therapist very drunk with a bottle in my hand to my appointment.
She called the emergencies and they took me to a psychiatric hospital, La Maison Blanche.
— —
It was very strange at first seeing all different kinds of patients, with all different mental illnesses.
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(the person is drinking water from a puddle, not praying)
— —
I stayed for about 15 days there and made some friends.
It wasn’t as bad as it first seemed.
— —
My siblings were aware of what was going on with me. But once again, I still felt under control of what was happening.
They didn’t think so, and they were right to think that.
One day I ran away of the hospital and drank cans of beer in the side walk.
That is when my siblings decided to tell my parents what was going on.
After going back inside the hospital, one of the nurses told me that my mother was on her way to see me, she took a 4h train to come.
She had no idea what was going on before. It must have been a terrible shock for her.
I felt so scared and embarrassed for her to see me in this blue outfit they had given me but they refused to give me back my clothes.
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— —
It was extremely difficult to balance my work and personal mental health.
I was coming to terms with my depression and accepting that I was, in fact, never in control of anything that was happening to me.
— —
After leaving the hospital, I went back to work.
It was very awkward at first.
The President of the company asked to speak with me about my long absence.
I didn’t want to go into details, so I just mentioned that I was at the hospital without saying why, or what kind of hospital…
Later that same day, someone from human resources also asked to speak to me.
She was asking is everything was okay and I told her what my therapist had told me to say, that I had a really sore throat.
Now looking back at it, I know that she knew exactly where I was. In a psychiatric hospital.
The papers the hospital were giving to my company to cover my absence, had the address on them.
So she knew…
— —
One day, my boss got fired out of the blue. He was such an amazing person and work colleague. He didn’t deserve this.
Later that month, my other Sales colleague, also got fired.
Cryptocurrency was not doing as well as it was before, and the company was slowly dying.
I was next to get fired.
It was the day before my birthday.
I remember my new, less cool boss, asked me to have a word with him and a person from HR.
I honestly thought at the time that I was getting a raise. Lol.
The conversation was very awkward, it lasted about 15 minutes. I don’t remember much of what was said.
They told me to leave straight away and not mention to anyone that I got fired.
I told my friend/colleague on Slack before leaving the building.
He was worried he was next to get fired.
So I sent him a brief message saying “turns out you were right about the Sales team getting fired. I have to leave now. Please don’t tell anyone.”
I left and went home.
— —
As I got home I lay on the sofa staring into oblivion.
I wanted to cry. I said to myself that this is a situation most people would cry.
But it was so hard to shed a tear.
I felt numb.
— —
I phoned my mother and told her what had happened. She was worried I would do something bad.
I invited my friend, Alienor, that I made from the hospital over, and we drank beer and took cocaine.
My father phoned me.
He could hear by my voice that I had drank.
My parents contacted Yolo to come pick me up and take me back to the hospital by Uber.
I felt obliged to go with her, so I went and Alienor left.
I only stayed one night or maybe two. I don’t really remember.
— —
I continued living in Paris for a couple of months, without a job.
I would drink everyday. Cans of Heineken beer.
I would wake up and drink straight away, while watching BoJack Horseman.
Then I would fall asleep around 6pm.
Everyday was the same pattern. Beer and BoJack.
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— —
I had stopped self harming, as I had promised myself since the 10 stitches to never start again. But suicide was still a big subject in my mind.
The website I had discovered, has the most common methods of suicide in order of success rate. And hanging myself seemed like an okay technique.
I wanted to test it out without actually killing myself.
I know it sounds weird.
I wanted to try and see if it was doable without actually doing it all the way.
——
I took the cotton belt off from my work trousers. I thought to myself that I wouldn’t need it anymore, as I don’t have a job anymore.
I tied a knot around my clothes hanger in my wardrobe, and tied the other side around my neck.
Then, I very gently bent my legs (as I could touch the floor).
The next thing I remember is waking up with the belt around my neck, in my wardrobe.
Saliva was all over my mouth. Snot was dripping from my nose.
It scared me.
I couldn’t undo the tight knot around my neck so cut it off with a pair of kitchen scissors.
I threw the belt in the bin and laid in my bed in a state of shock.
I phoned a friend at the time, and told him what just happened to me.
He came over and we talked about it.
— —
I liked him, he promised not to tell anyone and let me drink.
Yolo and Julie where more worried and protective. They would judge how much I would drink, and I didn’t really like that.
— —
One day, a colleague/friend of mine was organizing a small party at his house with about 8 people.
Julie, her boyfriend, Yolo and I all went along with other ex-work colleagues.
I got drunk quickly. And when I drank, I would talk too much.
I told a friend/ex-work colleague that I tried to hang myself the other day just to try it out but ended up fainting.
— —
Later that evening, I went home to my flat and fell asleep.
Around 3 in the morning, my door bell rang.
I didn’t know who it was, but opened the door all tired.
It was Julie, Yolo and another friend.
They were really worried about me.
What I had said at that party has gotten out, and everyone knew about it.
They told me I needed to go back to the hospital.
So I did the very next morning.
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— —
I went back to The Maison Blanche, and stayed there for 12 nights.
One of the male nurses saw me and asked why I was back, again.
I told him what had happened and he was very nice. He gave me advice and listened to me.
He mentioned that we should go out for drinks once I get out of the hospital. I agreed and gave him my number.
— —
We texted that night, while I was in my hospital bed.
Our text messages were very flirtatious.
The next following days we had sexual relations in my hospital room, and in the storage room.
— —
Once I left La Maison Blanche, I invited Alienor over to drink and take cocaine.
And I told her about my romantic affair I had at the hospital.
She didn’t seem surprised. She told me that another female patient had sexual relations with a nurse there too, and she wondered if it was the same nurse. So did I.
We sent a message to the girl in question and asked her to describe the male nurse she had relations with.
It was him. Paul. And she was 17.
— —
This suddenly felt wrong and I had to tell someone. So I told my mother about Paul and also Jacques.
She was really angry. More so about Paul the nurse than Jacques. But I felt the opposite.
I didn’t feel taken advantage of by Paul. But Jaques really hurt me.
My mother wanted me to report both of them to the police, so I did.
— —
My parents didn’t trust me living alone in such a big city so far away. I needed help.
In May 2019 I want to Rehab for alcohol and cocaine addiction.
I spent one month there. It was much nicer than the hospital. They had a ping-ping table, a chess set and many more activities.
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I spent a month in Rehab and it was really nice to be away from alcohol.
Alcohol affected me in bad ways.
I would say so many things I regret. I would hurt myself and make bad decisions.
I drank so much that when I didn’t, I would uncontrollably shake and feel faintish.
Rehab made me want to stop forever.
— —
My mother would visit me often and it was lovely to see her. She was very supportive.
After leaving Rehab, it was time for me to leave Paris forever and move back in with my parents down South of France.
I needed to not be alone. I needed help.
— —
I moved back into my old bedroom with my vinyls and The White Stripes posters. It was comforting.
I was now taking more medication : Paroxetine (20mg) and Abilify (5mg).
And it was making me feel better.
My mother wanted me to see one of the best therapists in France.
So I started seeing a new psychiatrist in Bordeaux, FR (1h away by train) every two weeks.
At first we did not get along.
I wanted him to help me forget about my ex, but he explained that it was not possible to forget the past, you must accept it as part of you, like a scar.
He wanted me start writing about my feelings in a journal. I was not good at it and did not enjoy it. But I did it anyway.
— —
A few months later, I was starting to feel much better and stronger.
My therapist was really helping me, and so was my family.
I decided it was time to find a job near my parents house.
In October 2019, I found a job as an Exhibition Assistant for a company in events.
I was saving up to move to Sydney, Australia. To start a new life far away. To a place I’ve always wanted to go to.
I’ve never been to Australia but didn’t care.
— —
Working for this company was not fun, and a lot of pressure. They wanted to me make a minimum of 200 phone calls a day. And I hated being on the phone.
I told my therapist about my job being very pressurizing and he told me to quite and move to Sydney sooner.
That sounded like a great plan! I was so happy about this decision.
I went home and bought myself a Working Holiday Visa.
— —
My psychiatrist decided it was time to stop my medication as I was doing really well.
So I stopped them gradually.
The withdraw effects were a nightmare.
I was sweating, felt nauseous, had diarrhea, felt extremely emotional…
But that only lasted for about 2 weeks.
I was so happy that I wasn’t taking any medication anymore!
I felt on top of the world.
— —
For New Years Eve, I decided to go see my old friends from when I was doing my Sound Engineering course.
I told them about what had happened to me, and I could see it made them sad. They told me that I was such a happy person before. That I didn’t deserve this.
I told them I was fine now and that it was in the past.
I didn’t drink on NYE and they respected that. But I felt odd. I felt numb for some reason. They loved me so much and expressed it. But I didn’t seem to feel the same way. I used to. But not anymore. I didn’t feel love for anyone and that worried me. I felt like a ghost.
— —
My mother picked me up and could tell that I was different.
I went to work the following day and did not feel well at all.
I could feel it all coming back. I was so scared and ashamed of relapsing. But I knew I was.
I told my boss that I wasn’t feeling well and she let me go home.
I got back home and told my parents : I think I’m depressed again…
— —
I saw my therapist again and every session he would read what I wrote.
This was the last time I wrote in my diary.
He closed my black book and called my mother in.
He told me I needed to go back to a psychiatric hospital.
— —
My parents drove me back home from Bordeaux after that session and we packed a suitcase and went to the nearest psychiatric hospital. La Candelie in Agen.
I remember hearing my therapist on the phone to the hospital telling them I have Borderline Personality Disorder. I had no idea what that was.
— —
I arrived at La Candelie and spent 7 weeks there.
I was not in a good state of mind.
I tried hanging myself multiple times there in the shower but couldn’t let go of all of my weight by bending my legs. I just couldn’t.
I cut myself often and managed to bring in Vodka.
It was a mess.
— —
They put me in the isolation room for one night.
The isolation room was horrific.
They gave me paper pajamas that would rip with the slightest movement.
The door was locked and I had a bucket to pee in.
I was not allowed a pillow or a blanket. It was so cold and my pajamas were ripped everywhere.
The next morning, I saw a psychiatrist from the hospital and told him that I was fine and just being dramatic. I did not want to go back there.
— —
After 7 long weeks I was finally allowed out.
It was a long time.
I was now on even more medication : Paroxetine, Abilify, Tercian, Alprazolam and Mirtazapine.
I felt so numb. Better, but numb.
Australia was not an option anymore. Not for a while anyway.
— —
Once I left the hospital, I was obliged to have a nurse come to my parents house every morning and evening to make sure that I take all my medication properly.
I also had to go a psychological-medical center once a week.
I got tired of explaining what happened when, where and why. It was hard to remember. So I decided to write all the bullet points down on a piece of paper.
— —
· Where am I now?
Today is the 13th of May 2021. I still suffer from my mental illness even though I wish it was all in the past.
I’m currently taking Mirtazapine, Abilify and Alprazolam and only see a nurse once a week to restock on medication.
My therapist appointments have been elongated to once a month.
I haven’t self harmed in about a year.
I do however still have episodes with suicidal thoughts, but they are less severe.
My therapist from Paris once told me that you will have ups and downs, but with time the ups will be less up and the downs less down.
It’s starting to make sense now.
I currently live in a small city called Agen (30m drive from my parents house) with my boyfriend Yann. He’s the best.
We met through an old friend of mine that I reconnected with last year.
I still don’t have many friends where I live, as they are all over the place (Montpellier, London and Paris)
— —
My mother took an online course about Borderline Personality Disorder, which I really appreciate. I feel like maybe she understands a part of me more.
— —
Julie left Paris and moved to Montpellier to become a Yoga instructor. She and her boyfriend are still together, building their new life in the South of France.
— —
Yolo is still in Paris, she recently got a job as a video editor for a cool company. She’s doing great.
— —
Pri is still in London, not as an Au Pair anymore but as a chef by day, and an Art Salon organizer by night. She’s always been very productive and I admire that.
— —
Alienor unfortunately is back in the hospital in Paris, La Maison Blanche, as she tried to commit suicide by jumping off of a bridge above train rails. She lost both of her legs and one arm, but thankfully survived.
— —
The criminal cases concerning Jacques and Paul the nurse, are still going on. It’s been a very long process but I hope it ends soon.
— —
I don’t have any news at all regarding Julien and do not plan on having any.
— —
· Why am I writing this?
Like I wrote at the beginning of this, longer than expected text, about my mental health, I am writing this for me, my family and friends and hopefully others who may relate to it and seek help if they need it.
I often mentioned that I felt under control of the situation, but I was wrong. So maybe someone reading this might make the decision to seek help.
I have no words to describe how thankful I am to the people who helped me.
This is not a suicide note, it’s the opposite. It’s a “life” note.
A note to remind me that some days can be nice and happy, but others can be very, very hard. But you must go on. You must keep on fighting. It might seem like an endless battle but it gets better.
Sometimes that’s hard to see. But I see it now.
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f1united · 4 years
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ceo luke/calum part 3
Summary: You are Luke’s PA and have a thing for his rival Calum after meeting him in a bar one night but you don’t know who he is
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"Yeah I suppose" you replied, giving him a faint smile.
"You suppose?" he questioned, his eyes looked curious.
"Yeah it was a long day but not too bad. I don't just drink alone after a bad day, I was here with friends"
"Yeah I saw you, couldn't help but notice you, you're gorgeous" he smiled back at you and you looked at his cute cheeks perk up. You blushed slightly at the comment, not knowing what to say. You turned your head back to the bar. "What is it?" he asked as you smiled stupidly to yourself before turning back to face him.
"Nothing, I've just never been complemented nicely at a bar before" you chuckled.
"Oh come on you definitely have"
"No I promise, guys are usually strange at bars"
"Well I can promise you I'm not strange" He laughed. "Do you fancy a drink? I'm Calum by the way"
"How could I decline that offer Calum?" you smirked as the bar tender made his way over to you.
"What can I get you guys?" This time it was a different guy. A lot younger than the one before, maybe in his twenties. You looked up at Calum and he motioned for you to go first.
After receiving your drinks you began to look for a table. Being unsuccessful inside, you made your way outside. The summer breeze was fresh but not too cold, it was the type of weather you loved. You found an empty bench a little further away from the entrance and sat down. Calum joined you, sitting on the same side as you. He was close enough that his scent was still strong and you couldn't help but breathe it in. As Calum sat down he pulled a packet of cigarettes from his front pocket and went to light one up.
"You don't mind do you?" He asked. You shook your head and gave him a little smile.
"Go for it" you gestured. "I'm Y/N by the way" you gave him another little smile as he lit up his cig and inhaled it.
"Lovely to meet you" he sent a wink your way as he blow smoke in the opposite direction.
"So, who were you here with?" You wondered. You hadn't noticed Calum until he had approached you. You weren't surprised as your table had been tucked away and you'd been so focused on catching up with your friends that you hadn't even looked around.
"I had a meeting over this side of town today. I don't live far, a little closer to Sydney. Just with some of the guys from work" he inhaled his cigarette once again.
"Ahhh what do you do?" you asked
"I have my own business" He didn't seem smug about his answer. That surprised you slightly. If anyone was to ask that question to Luke their answer would've been delivered with a smirk on his lips.
"You any good?"
"I mean you could maybe go a little better than good" he laughed. God why was he so cute.
"Oh really?" you smirked
"What do you do?" He asked
"I'm a personal assistant" he nodded his head at your reply.
"I've had some personal assistants, none of them were very good. Except the one I have now. He's a guy called Benny."
"Well I can assure you that I'm amazing at my job" you laughed slightly although it was true, you did know what you were doing when it came to work.
The conversation continued to flow for the next hour or so before Calum started to notice tiredness take its toll on you. Taking the last gulp of your drink, you pushed your glass across the table and gave him a little smile.
"Well I've had a lovely evening Calum" you found yourself smiley stupidly. What was coming over you. These things never usually happened to you.
"Do you mind if I take you home?" he placed his glass next to yours. "Just so I know you're safe" He gave you a concerning look.
"I live just over there" you nodded towards the tall apartment building down the road. He pushed himself up off the bench and stepped over the seat, holding a hand out for you to hold while you did the same. You gladly accepted.
"I'll walk you home then" he smiled, getting a firmer grip on your hand by intertwining you fingers as you began to walk into the direction of your building. You'd only just met this guy, yet you were strolling down the seat hand in hand on the way to your apartment. What was happening?
Once you reached the front of your apartment complex his grip loosened and you stood facing him. Looking into his eyes you noticed the beautiful shades of brown that you never even knew existed. You'd never really had someone politely ask to speak with you in a bar before and then nicely walk you home. You didn't really know what to say and Calum began to smile at your awkwardness.
"So this has been fun, maybe we should do it again sometime?" your voice didn't sound convincing as you trailed off at the end and turned your nose up at how cringey that had sounded. Calum just let out a laugh.
"Never done that before have you" He took your hands in his. "Of course we can, I had a great time. Maybe I could take your number though?" He grabbed his phone from his pocket and handed it to you. You quickly typed in your number and gave it back. He gave you a tight hug. Ah that smell of cologne, fresh linen and now a touch of cigarettes. He kissed you on the top of your head before releasing you.
"Night Calum" you smiled before walking through the glass doors and towards the lifts.
"Night gorgeous" He called back, he now had his hand in his pockets watching you press the button on the wall and step out of his sight.
He sighed slightly, trying to take in everything that had happened in the last few hours. How crazy was it that he had just met a beautiful girl that he could easily chat to and have a laugh with. He turned around and made his way back to the pub to reunite with the rest of his friends he had left inside.
"Not staying the night at hers then Cal?" One shouted at him as he walked back through the doors. The bar staff were clearing up and starting to move everyone out. He grabbed his jacket off the back of one of the chairs and pulled it on.
"You know I'm not like that" he frowned slightly at the remark.
"She was pretty though Cal"
"Very" Calum agreed as he waved to a taxi driving past. "Very pretty indeed". And with that, he hopped into the back of a taxi, and spent the rest of the night lying in bed wondering if it was too soon to send you a text.
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who wants a part 4?
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