#based on my life

[rugwurm]

why did she say that

#scribbles #limbus company #ishmael #faust #based on my life

[sylviaplathenthusiast]

sirius: in an attempt to stop me from picking at the scrap on my elbow remus started taking my hand and holding it for prolonged periods of time. he thinks he’s such a genius and that it’s a win on his side

sirius: who’s gonna tell him

#marauders incorrect quotes #based on my life #at this point i just type out my thoughts and assign them to a character #sirius black #wolfstar #remus lupin #marauders #the black brothers

[whump-about-it]

Healing Isn't Linear

@whumpril Day 2: Sweat No Appetite

CW: angst, trauma recovery, trauma from recovery, set backs in recovery, disordered eating, possible eating disorder? (no body dysmorphia), referenced panic attacks, referenced nausea.

The clock on Whumpee's laptop read 8:45 p.m.. They'd been staring at it since 8:41, watching the minutes pass and trying to remember if they had adjusted the time for day light savings. Did their computer do that automatically? When did daylight's savings start anyway? Was it an hour later? Or an hour earlier?

It didn't really matter. The whole mental exercise was only a way for Whumpee to distract themselves from the fact that it was well past time that they should have eaten dinner. As well as the fact that they really should have noticed that earlier.

Whumpee had missed lunch too. And all they'd had for breakfast was half a slice of toast. Whumpee should have been hungry. They should have been starving. But they felt nothing.

It had been the same the day before. And the day before that too. In fact it had been several days since Whumpee had had any sort of appetite to speak of. They'd been able to ignore it up to this point, but the realization that things were getting bad again was beginning to sink in.

It had been a few years since Whumpee had escaped Whumper. The first year after had been rough. Their physical wounds had healed quickly, but the mental recovery was almost worse than anything Whumper had done to them.

When the initial relief of rescue had faded, fear had begun to set in. What if Whumper came back? What if Whumpee couldn't acclimate to the outside world? What if no one believed what had happened to them? The anxiety and desperation had begun to wear on Whumpee in as many physical ways as mental. They couldn't sleep. When they did they had horrible nightmares. Panic attacks were a near daily occurrence and the times between them were so fraught with anxiety that Whumpee could barely leave the house.

Everything came to a head with their appetite. The anxiety is what had started it. Even at their calmest, the tightness in Whumpee's chest was so constricting that they constantly felt on the verge of being out of breathe. Having to actually hold their breathe for any reason such as drinking or chewing felt so suffocating that Whumpee began to avoid such actions as much as possible. Soon enough, the feeling of hunger began to become synonymous with impending panic attacks, and then began to be replaced by them. Before long Whumpee had no appetite to speak of, and could only manage a few bites of food before panic would set in. Even the smell of food began to make Whumpee nauseous from the anxiety of knowing that eating it was going to make them suffer.

Even as their other symptoms began to improve, Whumpee's appetite stubbornly refused to return. They had wasted away to less than they had been when they were with Whumper. A pale, shivering, bag of bones, sinking into corners and shadows anytime food was brought up. Caretaker had had to apply some very tough love, before Whumpee eventually began to improve. Threatening to check them into impatient care if they didn't agree to getting treatment. The whole idea felt too much like being locked up again. So despite giving Caretaker the silent treatment for a month afterwards, Whumpee agreed.

It had been years since that had been an issue. Other problems would resurface occasionally. Insomnia, nightmares, panic attacks. And Caretaker was always quick to check on Whumpee's eating habits when they divulged to them that things were getting harder. But until now, Whumpee's appetite, and diet, had at least remained stabled.

It was thinking about Caretaker that finally compelled Whumpee to close their laptop and stand up. They would notice something was off soon if Whumpee didn't get a handle on the situation. The only reason they hadn't yet was because work was busy for them right now and they hadn't been over to Whumpee's house since before things started up. Their work wasn't slated to die down again anytime soon either, and Whumpee didn't want to give them anything else to worry about. So they made their way to the kitchen and pulled some leftovers out of the fridge.

You're going to be fine.

Whumpee told themselves as they watched their left overs spin lazily around the microwave.

You won't have a panic attack if you eat.

You'll still be able to breathe if you eat.

The microwave beeped its completion and Whumpee took the now steaming food out to set on the counter. They were hit with the warm, delicious smell of noodles and pasta sauce which they basked in for a split second before a wave of nausea washed over them so intense they doubled over.

Oh this isn't good.

Whumpee's chest tightened. Their throat felt like it was closing. The room began to wobble around them and their heart rate spiked.

You have to eat!

Even the thought of it made bile rise in Whumpee's throat. With one last mournful look at their dinner, Whumpee tossed it in the trash where the smell couldn't nauseate them anymore.

Maybe some crackers will do better.

#whump #whumpril2024 #no appetite #whump drabble #whumprilday2 #tw trauma recovery #tw phobia of food #tw disordered eating #tw possible eating disorder #depending on how you want to define that #based on my life

[aprettyfeverdream]

Dick*sitting minding his own business* Talia: “Richard”

Dick:

Talia: “Richard!”

Dick *turns around to see Talia holding Damian upside down by his ankles while Damian cackles*

#batfam moments inspired by my life #talia al ghul #richard grayson #dick grayson #damian wayne #damian al ghul #batfam #batfamily #Bruce Wayne/Talia Al Ghul #based on real life #based on my life #Enjoy the chaos #there’s more to come

[fritzllang]

okay it's my turn now. hyperspecific poll

#say in the tags which one as well if you vote! #based on my life #i cant tell if these are too specific or not specific enough #polls #poll #tumblr polls #my polls

[lady-rafael]

Mental health rant under neath the cut

Tw:

Idk generally bad thoughts no privacy dublde standards

I can't deal with this shit no more fucki can't deal with this shit to many double standers just cuz I was born with a vagina man to many double standers and no one irl to this shit about ngl online freinds are banger but can't shake there shoulders for emphasis lol my brothers get away with anything for having dicks idk if jts the teen age hormones menstruation or me just over reacting but I'm angry and cmat deal with this shit sobbing rn but here's no privacy in this damm house I have no rooms even tho my brothers tho can't lock no doors no ii dropped a quikt over my self put the ac on and hope I don't get a heat stroke I'm already fasting tho to the cult known as islam some Muslims are nice and shit but I don't want to be in this cult where I can't even be bisexual in peace but I prefer not be stoned to death even tho that would mean I die and I don't have to deal with this shit but fuck I can't day before I tell my family to fuck off eat ass telll them u shouldn't children amd send them a pic of my kissing a women that would be funny but goddam I can't deal with the fact my brothers and steal my shit be bifchy hurt me whatever and if I complain I get the same damm response

Brothers are just like that

Fuck the best I get is my nice aunt saying they should be nicer I can't deal with my mother's telling me weather she disciples them or not there gonna be like that mo birth giver this sis your fualt I'm a bit bitchy at times but I'm fine amd our westerners magic or some shit or are there boys women in discise no matter what I do they arnt gonna take me seriously fuck once I told my mother I tried to kill me self (it was bout something stupid lol) she went on and on about that would ruin there reputation and shit fuck amd the thing is I'm self aware his shit is wrong but fuck I'm a supposed to do about it I'm here sobbing under a quilt having a heat stroke but the thing I ain't making a single noise beacuse I masterd the art of crying silent I hold my breath then I take a breath quickly so nothing goes out fuck I wanna draw but I can't beacuse my brothers lost my coulers reasonable I still have more then enough to draw beacuse it was a big set with 2 hundred coukers but jt a gift and my maybe autistic ass can deal with so many of them missing I want my set back I want my fans sharpener and fancy eraser back I lost one couler man ONE YET THERES still so many missing my brothers call me so many names yet they go off scott free I have afew online freid s one I vent to but he made the mistake kf being born a boy and I'm a girl so no I can't talk to him fuck and I have no privacy my mom says no privacy till marriage but maybe thags my fault for being bad with technology I changed changed my accounts to my on only a matter of time till my brothers complain to mum about it but my acount was made by brother but I forgot that so I have have find out how to change that if possible amd my conversations are spied by my brothers its so unfair maybe its just a hormonsbut I can't dealcwih this shit why is everything my fault I have half mind mind cut of my breasts and vagina and did I mention I can't run bescuse my chest is developing and I lady shouldn't run and shit while my brother can go fuck of and play football I understand that thers ba dpeople who want ogle at breats and I understand I'm developing my chest a bit earlier then other but dose that mean the little child hood I have should be takes from me should I filch from my mother while my brothers don't why do I have so many more rules that others don't I can't deal with this man I can't I'm so depressed I'm not even writing poetry like usual why are my hobby cringe and weird but when my brothers do it it's different and cool my one escapism famfictions where no matter how much shit tommy goes throw he eventually gets his found family and a happy ending but why don't I!!! Its unfair I go throw dukble the hurt none the fluff my brothers constantly shit on it why are you reading GAY fanfictions when jts gen GEN only reason they think it's gay is because they can't read the tags and think the fact

Tommy innt talks to tubbo

Means tommy is violently fucking him il admit I read original smut time to time but get it right I would never read shut about real people even if it's about the characters my brothers also fuckin gread fanics one of my brother lotions to narouto fnafics the other used to write jojo fan fics prob still dose maybe but I was the only one he felt safe and comfortable enough to show what changed! Now he shots on the fact I write and read i would never think about showing him what I write he tales my things and gets no consequences I'm younger and a bit weaker so I can't even hit him if i do he hits my harder then I scolded this is so fucking unfair i just what someone who o cam show my things who I can love maybe I read to much fanfics of happy endings but lord i wish I could get a time skip to my happy ending skip my hurt I could spend this time writing my storys next chapter but gods I don't want to do anything nowadays I know the reason I want to into the sport club is so I can spend less time at my home call it escapism if you want but gods I don't know man i just don't wanna do this I wanna leave every one is my family sucks but I still love them and that's why it hurts I don't wanna do any of this I don't want to be Muslim I don't wanna be in the closet I don't want to hide hiw fuckimg feminist I am my brothers will proudly say

They hate Indians and there racist they will be say there transphobic homophobic racist sexsist abalist etc my fucking freind is a gay trans man who's autist I'm freinds with a Indian online I think women are fucking sexy I belive everyone deserves rights I don't agree with anything of them I almost wish I was worse all those bad things just so i cam fit in I get so jealous when I read fanfics of loving sibling dynamics now a days why can't I have that Why it's just so unfair I don't wanna do this I don't wanna do this gods I'm blaming this on my peiord but before I leave why the fuck is that so tabbo man why half the population dose it so why do I have to hide it man why are man's so macho when they can't handle the thought that i bleed of my vagina I can't deal with this bullshit man I can't being a women sucks i wanna kiss a girl fuck boy kisser I wanna be a girl kisser women are sexy and oh did i mention what a fucked up relationship I have with my body i once got sick as fuck and my mother said that atleast I'm losing so much weight beacuse of this like mom that's not a good thing I like the compliments I get but it's not worth being hungry and I'm still fat it's so unfair i can't deal with this shit no one fuckinb knows I'm crying bescuse I'm crying so silently when I want to scream so bad rn I'm natursly a scream Cryer but I had to master being silent gods I don't wanna live like this

Peace out yall love your self drink water

I'm gonna go kill my self/jkjk

#bad #bad mental health #i wanna kill my self jkjk #i wanna kill my family #help yall #based on my life #sad thoughts

[imwall-e]

Willow & The Winter Soldier (W&TWS) - Series Masterlist

Summary : He is a super-soldier of more than 100 year old, struggling to find a place in this new world. She is a young student of 23, struggling with life. But they know they can find comfort and help in each other.

Pairing : Bucky Barnes x OFC (Willow)

Serie Warning : fluff, angst, grief, smut, mention of PTSD and depression. More to add.

See warnings at the beginning of each chapters.

Author's note : English isn't my main language so I apologize for the mistakes. This isn't beta read. I started posted this on my Wattpad account and my Ao3 account.

PART I - NEW LOVE

Chapter 1 : The day they met

Chapter 2 : Issues

Chapter 3 : Her broken heart

Chapter 4 : Sharing his secrets

Chapter 5 : Holidays

Chapter 6 : Love is in the air

PART II - SUMMER

Chapter 7 : Doubts

PART III - STUDENT AND CEO

PART IV - GRIEVING

#coming soon #new fic #based on my life #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes fanfiction #james buchanan barnes #bucky #bucky barnes x oc #masterlist #marvel #marvel fanfic #original characters #original female character

[busyasabbey]

#Fireman Sam #Love Confessions #Fanfic #Based on my life #Emily #How I told my best friend I'm in love with her #Obvious and obliviously in love

[talyn-incorrect-quotes]

I’m just distracted by this huge ass crack.

Remus, probably

#tal incorrect quotes #remus sanders #thomas sanders #sanders sides #based on my life

[sylviaplathenthusiast]

sirius: i have way too many anxiety symptoms for someone who doesn’t give a fuck

#marauders incorrect quotes #based on my life #marauders #sirius black

[cerealdog]

What are friends for

#pearlescentmoon #geminitay #shiny duo #based on #secret life smp #but also #hermitcraft #slsmp #my art

[chloesimaginationthings]

Vanny has a FNAF game question for Michael..

#myart #chloesimagination #comic #michael afton #fnaf vanessa #fnaf vanny #fnaf #sister location #security breach #fnaf help wanted #fnaf fanart #five nights at freddy's #a very unserious comic idea that appeared in my head #Michael is just proving he’s THE GUY #must be weird for Vanny to learn about the whole Afton thing thru game development etc #and then meeting the guy it’s based off of #The pixel art was spot on to Michael carries his energy #idk how Michael feels about all the games about his life #he’s probably just past it like nothing he can do now 💀 #why not embrace his status BAHA

[lady-rafael]

Echos of my mind spill on to paper

Blood staing the words oh so somber

In between the blood stained paper lies shining tears

Poetry they call it I say madness

A single compliment makes my heart rest

I say what I can't in words

Every line made beautiful made out of my blood

Life breaks me down slowly my mind left rotting

My body breaking and creaking

I take what I can still pure and good

I spill it on paper with blood tears to

Yet never it goes cleanly my demons following throw

Poetry I call it

Image of my pain my demons drawn beautifully

My life preserved in paper

My demons will live on beyond me

I beg God for mercy

I beg my angels the pearls of my heart

Will outlive my demons

#spilled ink #based on my life #sad poetry #writeblr #sad thoughts #no im not okay #thx for calling my work beautiful #thx to dark snowy nights

[imwall-e]

W&TWS || Sharing his secrets

Summary : He is a super-soldier of more than 100 year old, struggling to find a place in this new world. She is a young student of 23, struggling with life. But they know they can find comfort and help in each other.

Pairing : Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count : 1458

Warnings : insecurities, anxiety, fluff

Series Masterlist

April 9th, 2021

The month of April had begun with the sun and warmer temperatures. Therefore, more people could be seen outside, enjoying this more than pleasant weather. And the Easter holidays were a week away. Everyone seemed really happy. However, Bucky was torn between opposite feelings.

On one hand, he was really happy that holidays were close because it would allow him to spend more time with Willow. But on the other hand, he was anxious that somebody would recognize him and tell her something. He wanted to tell her the truth about his past himself even if he feared her reaction.

A week earlier, they both agreed that he’d pick her up and they would dine together. James wanted to surprise Willow and take her to a nice and calm restaurant where they might discuss.

Having a few hours left before coming to Willow’s house, he called Steve to explain the situation and get some advice.

“You didn’t tell her about us ?” Asked the blonde, half-shocked, half-amused.

“I talked about everyone. I just didn’t tell her about the Avengers and everything. And especially not about the Winter Soldier.���

“Buck… you know that the President pardoned you. Plus, Tony and Nat did their best to erase…”

“Steve!”James interrupted him. “It doesn’t change what I did. Some people know. Some people recognise me. It is rare but it happens, and it’s the worst. I don’t want Willow to reject me, to talk to me like these people do when they realise who I am.”

“You’re James Buchanan Barnes. The Winter Soldier wasn’t you, it was Hydra, one of their creations. You didn’t have a choice.”

It broke Steve’s heart to see his best friend like that. He could see that Bucky was on the verge of tears. He knew his past will always haunt him, either on his dreams or on his everyday life. But he also knew that he found a purpose with his new enterprise. And with Willow in the Sergeant's life, Steve hoped that she would be a light in the darkness.

"We'll talk later." That's was all Bucky said before closing his laptop so violently that he broke it. Shit. He needed it for work. But at the moment, he didn't really care. He was angry. Against Steve. Against himself. Against everyone.

Crying silently on his bed, he couldn't stop the memories from taking over his mind. They led him to the day Steve asked him to train the new recruits.

A year ago Steve and Bucky were waiting in the training room. The Sergeant became more and more anxious as the minutes went by. It didn’t go unnoticed by his best friend.

“Don’t worry, it’ll be fine. I’m sure they’ll learn a lot with you. You know, you’ll also be great on missions.”

“I’m not ready to go back on the field. I’m not sure I’ll ever go back there. I want some change,” he admitted while checking his watch. “Weren’t they supposed to arrive ten minutes ago ?”

“Stay there, I’m gonna check. Maybe they didn’t receive the correct schedule.”

Steve left the room heading for the new recruits’ wing in the batiment. There were rooms for those who wanted to stay, and a shared living room with a kitchen.

Bucky was waiting, playing with his knife, but he quickly noticed that Steve was gone for longer than necessary. As he didn’t want to wait any longer, and was also worried, he decided to check if Steve was with the recruits.

It didn’t take long to find the area and Steve’s voice was getting louder as Bucky got closer. When he understood that the conversation was about him, he stopped and hid behind a wall to listen to it.

“You didn’t come to your training because Sergeant Barnes will be your instructor for today ?” Steve sounded angry and exasperated at the same time.

“Mr Rogers, you have to understand us. He’s an assassin, he…

“He was,” Steve interrupted the man who started to insult Bucky. “Hydra turned him into an assassin. They tortured him for decades. But you don’t seem to take that into consideration.”

“And you don’t seem to understand that we’re scared. It could still be a part of him, which means he could kill us at any moment. I don’t trust him and I want you to find someone else,” required a woman, followed by her colleagues.

That was enough for Bucky who didn’t want and didn’t need to hear more. He took his bike and rode for a moment. That’s when he decided to travel and start doing something new in his life. He didn’t share this with Steve first. Instead he went to Tony Stark.

The man who was also known as Iron Man forgave him for what happened. It took time but they surprisingly bonded really fast and a friendship was born. Bucky was really interested in new technology and progress in science while he was “gone”, and Tony was more than happy to help him understand. And also to talk about his own creations.

That’s how Bucky decided to start a communication enterprise. Tony helping him and also being an associate.

Present time The song All I Have To Do Is Dream by The Everly Brothers slowly woke Bucky up. He didn’t even notice he fell asleep. Then, he suddenly stood up and reached for his phone as he realised it wasn’t just any song, it was his ringtone. Willow was calling.

“Willow? Sorry, I fell asleep.”

“Okay, I was just a bit worried because you were supposed to pick me up half an hour ago and you weren’t answering. I waited and then decided to call.”

“I’m so, so sorry. I’ll be there in ten minutes. Is that okay for you? I promise I’ll make it up to you. We’ll order all the desserts they’ve got if you want.” He said that in one breather while rushing to put on his shoes and take the keys of his car.

“It’s fine, James. I’ll be waiting in front of the house. See you in a minute.”

“On my way, Sunflower!” He hung up and realised that he gave her a nickname.Thta came out so naturally. He liked that but at the same time he hoped that she hadn’t noticed it.

✪✪✪

As promised, Willow was waiting outside. Bucky parked his car and, like a gentleman, opened the door on the passenger side for her. On their way to the restaurant, he couldn’t stop apologising for letting her wait so long.

“James, I swear to you, it’s fine. It can happen to everyone,” she tried to reassure him. “You seem so tense. Are you sure everything’s alright ?”

“Yeah, sure. It’s fine. Everything’s fine. Perfect. And you’re perfect. And…”

“James ?”

“I’m sorry, it’s just that I have something very important to tell you, and it makes me so nervous.”

“Why?”

“It’s about my past and I’m scared you’re going to hate me.”

“Does it have something to do with the Avengers and the Winter Soldier ?”

“You know ?” James was getting more and more anxious. They arrived near the restaurant but none of them exited the car. Bucky couldn’t look at Willow.

“My friend Alex saw a picture of you and they love the Avenger. One of their biggest dreams is to meet them. They did so much research that I think they deserve a PhD about the subject. Then, they recognized you and explained The Winter Soldier’s story to me ; that it wasn’t really you and everything.”

“How did they find all the information?”

“I honestly don’t know, but they’re really talented for that. Anyway, I didn’t want to tell you because it had to be your choice to talk to me about that. But now that I see how anxious you are, I have to tell you.”

“So, is it the last time I see you ?” James’ eyes filled with tears, still unable to look at her.

“I hope not. James, it’s your past and from what I understand, you were brainwashed. You’re not The Winter Soldier. You’re James Buchanan Barnes, and I really like to spend time with you. The man I know is nice, cares for others and apologises a thousand times when he’s thirty minutes late.”

That made Bucky laugh and he finally looked at Willow, only to find that she was smiling at him and giving him a tissue so he could wipe off the tears from his face.

“Thank you, Willow. We should go to eat now, because I’m really hungry.”

“Same for me. I just thought you renamed me Sunflower.”

She laughed softly and that’s when he realised his feelings for her were growing stronger with every minute he spent with her.

Series Masterlist || Chapter 1 || Chapter 2 || Chapter 3 || Chapter 5 || Chapter 6

#ceo!bucky barnes #based on my life #james buchanan barnes #bucky #bucky barnes x oc #marvel fanfic #marvel #sebastianstanfan #sebastianstan #friends to lovers #soft!bucky barnes #original female character #original characters

[deadmomjokes]

PSA: tomatoes are not spicy. Tomatoes and tomato products should not be spicy. Pizza sauce isn't inherently spicy. Tomato-based pasta sauce is not spicy. Ketchup is NOT spicy.

If tomatoes are spicy, you have an allergy to tomatoes.

This announcement brought to you by my almost 29-year-old husband learning for the first time in his 2.8 decades of putting food products into his mouth that spaghetti and saucy pizza aren't spicy foods

#his amazement at our daughter eating spaghetti willingly #when apparently he's been suffering in silence over there his whole life #and i'm like ???? #and he's like ''you didn't make this spicy?'' #NO #NO I DID NOT #and he just blue screens for a minute #and i'm like YOU THINK SPAGHETTI IS SPICY??? #and he's all ''yeah that's why i prefer we don't have it very often'' #the absolute SHOCK i tell you #turns out he hates ketchup because it's spicy and he never understood why people wanted to dip fries in spicy sauce #i was like ''DUDE ketchup is supposed to be sweet and maybe a touch tangy but also cool and refreshing'' #and he's like ''SWEET?????'' #so uh yeah turns out dude's allergic to tomatoes and he just assumed everyone had a way higher spice tolerance than him #cuz he can find ''non spicy'' food too hot #and it's just all tomato based stuff and we never thought to connect the dots #mild salsa? too spicy. IT'S THE TOMATOES. #tacos? too spicy even at baby heat levels. IT'S THE TOMATOES. #prefers alfredo to marinara despite alfredo having objectively more pepper in it than marinara #he thought his spice tolerance was just so wimpy that my 'normal' was too spicy for him #so he's just been dealing with 1-3 meals a week being spicy to him our entire marriage WITHOUT SAYING A WORD #because he didn't want to offend me with his wimpy palate #IT'S THE TOMATOES #it's always been the gosh darn tomatoes

[emthimofnight]

more of my hypothetical fankid Stellar so I can push my girl dad Shadow agenda LOLLL

#my art #sonadow #sonic the hedgehog #shadow the hedgehog #shadonic #sketch #shadow #sonic #sonic art #fankid #fanchild #stellar the hedgehog #sonic prime #second sketch is based on some EXCELLENT tags on my original post #the idea that Shadow could no longer see himself as the ultimate life form after his daughter is born... so cute