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#batboys x reader
Y/N, sneaking out, whispering: Yeah, I’m almost out... of course I have the good stuff... No my brother’s don’t kno- [The lights turn on] All her brothers standing like a wall in front of the door: Y/N: Dick: Age range, where, with who, at what time and what good stuff? Y/N, pouting: 12-16, at the park, with my friends, at 8pm and chocolate...
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Kon-el: can i stay with you tonight?
Jason: sure, what happened?
Kon-el: well, Tim and I got into a fight and he has been watching "how to get away with a murder" ever since.
Kon-el: I don't feel safe anymore Jay
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jason: alright timmy it's time for your 60 seconds of nerd
y/n: what?
jason: tim gets 60 seconds a day to nerd out while i pretend to be interested it's surprisingly beneficial for both of us. go tim
tim:wellifyouthinkaboutiteverythingisprovablemathematicallysoessentiallyeverythingismathbutthatmeanstheresawayto *INTENSE DEEP BREATH* computeemotionslikewearealljustbinarycodehowcrazyisthathappinessisjustzerosandoneslikeokaygetthi-
jason: TIME
tim: thanks man, see ya tmr?
jason: of course little dude <3
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gabytodd · a year ago
[yn]: alright jason, shoot your shot.
jason: *leaning against the wall, looking @ [yn]* well damn baby, i was wondering if...
jason: oh, yeah, right.
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Damia : I think Alfred mixed up out lunches. Look. [holds up a post-it note that says “I love you so much.”] Y/N: Oh, that explaines this. [holds up a post-it note that says “Please be good. For the love of God, be good.”
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anothertimdrakestan · 11 months ago
y/n: hey guys! whatcha been doing during quarentine?
steph: i became a pro gamer and i think i'm like lowkey twitch famous it's whatever
damian: i've started a small zoo
dick: i think i got... tik tok famous
jason: i adapted a new style i like the edgier look it's sexy
tim: damn i've just been drinking iced coffee and crying for three months straight but go off i guess
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Damian: [going on lunch-dates with his siblings] I have no intention of being your brother Damian: [playing video games with everyone] You’re all just stepping stones to my success Damian: [baking a cake for Y/N’s birthday] Family is a distraction Damian: [in a group hug] disgusting 
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anothertimdrakestan · a year ago
Tim: day 89 of convincing Damian that Alfred is a robot: i've got Jay and Kon with me and we've told Damian that Alfred is programmed into the house
Jason: Alfred can you open the window in my bedroom?
Alfred, in the kitchen: Yes master Jason
Conner: *opens the window then hides*
Damian: :O
Tim: Alfred can you prepare some coffee for me?
Alfred: Of course Master Tim though i must remind you caffine is not the best for your mental state at 9pm - but i shall start it right away
Jason, hiding in the cabinet: *presses the coffee button*
Damian: *confused screeches*
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woahjaybird · 10 months ago
Batfamily headcanons.
Things often said through Comm-links. 
● “Tim, you need to help me hack into the Gotham Times system. They cannot put that picture of me in their main article.” 
● “Psst, psst, Alfred! Are you hearing me? How long do you think it would take me to buy that bag of donuts and come back?” 
● “I swear to god if you bought me the Jelly-filled donut i will murder you, Todd.” 
● *Whiney* “But i don’t WANNA!” 
● “That’s not FAIR, YOU HAVE WINGS!” 
● “What are you- whaT ARE YOU EATING?!” 
● “TAG! YOU’RE IT!” 
● “The last piece of Alfred’s carrot cake is MINE! dON’T EVEN LOOK AT IT!” 
● “Was that you? Jason, was that you?! DID YOUR STOMACH JUST GRUMBLE?!” 
● “Why can’t we bring a snack to patrol? Steph brought a fucking lunchbox.”
● “Bruce that’s not FAIR, you packed Dick a granola bar and you have me celery sticks?!” 
● “How much do you wanna bet that if i jump, someone’s going to catch me?” 
● *hands Dick $20* “at this pace I’ll never get rich :(” 
● “Alfred, I’m sure you can find a way to put air conditioner in my pants.” 
● “Dick you can’t just cry on patrol...” “But that PUPPY!” 
● “Come along, Todd. We don’t need a speedster friend.” 
● “WHO ARE YOU AND WHO DO YOU WORK FOR?!” “If you don’t want the vegan brownies then I’ll eat them.” 
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Jason, tapping on the table: Dick, tapping back furiously: Tim: What’s going on? Y/N: They learned morse code so they could talk to each other secretly Jason: ..-. .-.. .- - .- ... ... Dick, slams fists on table: YOU TAKE THAT BACK!!!
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anothertimdrakestan · 11 months ago
bruce: we have to talk about patrol now, i'm not mad i just need to know what happened and why
jason, under his breath: dick do not break. we say nothing
dick, physically shaking: i- i- TIM AND DAMIAN SAID-
damian: *knocks dick out*
bruce: you can't keep knocking him out boys there could be brain damage
tim: snitches get stitches.
jason: retweet
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The batkids stanging in the subway station: Damn, we lost Damian Dick, gets on his tiptoes: Dick: I can’t see him, there’s too many people Y/N, sneezes:  Damian, bursts through the crowd, holding a box of tissues and a glass of warm water: HOLD SHIT ARE YOU ALRIGHT?!? WHAT HAPPENED?!?! 
Jason: We could’ve just left... It would’ve been so easy....
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anothertimdrakestan · 10 months ago
jason: tims in one of his moods again
dick: damn. which one this time?
duke: he has multiple?
jason: e-boy with chains, god is a woman with purple eyeliner and dresses, streetwear with baggy pants and crop tops-
dick: cottage core with butterfly clips, farm aesthetic, skater boy, anime boi-
damian: wannabe tik toker, business stonks boy, pure depression, shockingly happy, caffine overdoesed
duke: oh my gosh he has so many...
tim, rocking little pony tails and blush: rawr x3 nuzzles pounces on you uwu you so warm!
damian: god dammit add it to the list
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