Bad Batch Fluff
Prompt chosen by my wife @icedcoffee101
TW: arguing/bickering, a few dark implications here and there, ms. tano not leaving the jedi order, Ahsoka saving the day
Word count: 2163
Prompt/Inso: #4 from my list: Fun times with a lightsaber
QUICK NOTE: BSL stands for Basic Sign Language, and yes I made it up
“Why exactly are we giving our debriefings on Coruscant?” Crosshair asked, the question directed beside him at Hunter who was fiddling with a datapad. Something about booking landing zones?
“The Jedi want to meet us in person apparently,” Tech, who was bringing the Havoc out of hyperspace, answered instead.
“Haven’t we met them already?”
“It’s statistically impossible for us to meet-”
“I didn’t ask what was statistically impossible,” he sat forward in his seat. “I asked why we’re debriefing on Coruscant.”
“They ask squads to report to Coruscant whenever they feel it’s necessary,” Echo said from the co-pilot's chair.
“That must waste a lot of time,” Wrecker piped in from behind them all.
“The jedi just love to control everything,” Cross mumbled and sat back up, crossing his arms.
“I doubt you’d get away saying that around them.”
“Well then it’s a good thing we haven’t landed yet.”
“Will you ever stop being so condescending to authority?” Echo turned to face him.
“Guys,” Hunter interjected. “Enough.”
Echo rolled his eyes and turned back to help Tech land the ship.
“We have better things to do than meet the people who send us to die every day,” Cross wryly concluded. He got up and went to open the hatch. The bright Coruscant sun blinded him for a few seconds as he stepped out onto the tarmac, the rest of the batch following closely.
They lined up and stood at attention for the general approaching from the Jedi temple.
“At ease Clone Force 99, welcome to Coruscant,” Jedi General Plo Koon greeted them. “I assume you know why you’ve been called here.”
“Yes, general,” Hunter answered.
“There will be an evaluation of the mission's report and of course an extensive debrief...” Plo Koon went on about how the day would shape out for the batch and what was expected of them, Hunter nodding at every word beside him while the rest of the batch followed in their path.
“You’d think they’d be more efficient,” Crosshair mumbled to himself.
“Trust me, CT-9904, this is the most efficient and effective system for assessing clone squads,” Plo Koon turned to look at a flustered Crosshair.
He nodded and muttered an apology.
“Just through here, it won’t take an obscene amount of time I’m sure,” the general gestured to a doorway as they climbed the staircase of the temple.
“‘It won’t take an obscene amount of time’ he says. ‘This is the most efficient and effective system’ he says,” Crosshair complained on the way back to the Havoc.
The bustling city around the temple went on as the sun was crawling towards the horizon, casting a wave of deep orange over the little part of Coruscant. The clones walked wearily back to their ship, completely exhausted from the assessment and debriefing. The helmets under their arms were close to falling out of their grips as every step took more energy out of them.
“It could’ve been worse,” Wrecker tried to reason.
“Worse? What could’ve been worse than that!”
“Being court marshalled, decommissioned, reconditioned-” Echo started rhyming out, counting on his left hand.
“You know what I mean!” He threw his free arm in the hair.
Echo smirked. His favourite game was messing with Crosshair, it was just so easy, it was always an effortless achievement.
Tech was lagging behind the others, too busy sorting through his notes from the assessment on his datapad to contribute to whatever Echo and Cross were arguing about. Though, he wasn’t so tuned out that he missed the small cylinder his foot kicked. The metal tube made a small jostling sound as it rolled a couple feet away from Tech. He’d studied them enough to know what it was on sight. A lightsaber.
Not uncommon on temple grounds, but very uncommon just lying on the tarmac. Such a crucial part of the Jedi religion would never be left without its user nearby. He looked left, looked right, nothing but perfectly lined up ships on either side. No jedi to claim it, no general there to see him maybe...
He quickly picked it up and stuffed it in his satchel. What could happen? A Jedi would need to make another one, boohoo. They’ve made them for thousands of years, their stash wouldn’t deplete. The religion would survive, the temple would still stand, the war would go on. Who cares if he gets to study a lightsaber up close? He was becoming as giddy as a cadet. Who ever got to study a lightsaber other than their creators and the wielders?
As soon as they were in hyperspace, he whipped it out and started examining the intricate designs and mechanisms. Tech had fiddled with it for a solid couple of hours, trying to open up the hilt, before Wrecker noticed Tech had been weirdly quiet during their hyperspace trip.
“What is that?” He asked, pointing to it for emphasis.
Everyone turned to look at where Wrecker was pointing. Tech slowly raised his gaze from the small tool in his hand that was previously trying to pry open the hilt. His feet were on the seat, his eyes level with his knees and various small tools were balanced on them.
They stared at him, at first, with fear for their own skins. Then it turned to frustration. They all knew Tech wasn’t one to let go of something he wanted to study, but this definitely crossed a line.
“Tech,” Hunter said slowly, like he was coaxing a clanker into submission.
Tech sprang from his seat and darted down the Havoc, the rest of the Batch quickly following.
He spun around and the green blade ignited from the hilt in his hand. Everyone jumped back immediately, hands held up in surrender. Tech practically threw it away from him in surprise. The polished dark metal hilt clattered to the ground and the green plasma retracted, leaving the crew in an adrenaline-filled silence.
Then all hell broke loose.
“What the absolute fuck were you thinking!” Echo yelled, not so much a question.
“It was just lying there!”
“You can’t just go around taking lightsabers whenever you damn well please!”
“But no one was using it-”
“We were at a Jedi fucking temple, Tech!” Echo threw his arms in the air.
“I’m sure he didn’t mean anything by it,” Wrecker tried reasoning.
“Really! He didn’t mean anything by it! Stealing a fucking lightsaber isn’t nothing!” Echo was fuming angry. “We could get in so much trouble, do you understand that!”
“Enough Echo, we all know how serious this is,” Hunter interjected.
“I don’t think you do!” He took a step towards Hunter, his fist shaking.
“Echo, they’ll know it’s a misunderstanding, it isn’t like they’re going to execute us,” he tried lightening the tension, but it seemed to only make it worse.
Echo looked at all of them with a dark look on his face. “You’re all lucky I have strings I can pull.”
“And what are those, exactly?” Crosshair smugly asked.
“I know people, and most of them own me favours.”
Echo dug through his belt of pouches to retrieve a single commlink.
“Oh yeah, we’re all saved,” Cross mumbled, walking back up the aisle to the cockpit, conveniently where the lightsaber was sitting.
“Rex, we have a problem,” he spoke into the comm, leaning against one of the bunks.
A few tension-filled seconds passed.
“Oh no, do I want to hear this?” Rex’s staticky voice filled the silence.
“Probably not, is Commander Tano with you?”
“Uh, yeah, hold on.”
The comm went silent for longer, everyone growing restless.
“Great plan, your reg Captain ditched you,” Cross said from the isle, no one noticing him examining the polished dark metal hilt.
“Echo? What’s up, what happened?” Ahsoka’s calm voice floated through the comm.
“You remember that place with the thing that one time and the promise you made?” Echo’s lips twitched up in amusement.
“Oh god, don’t remind me,” she groaned. “What do you need? How can I help?”
He gave Tech an irritated look. “Well, we accidentally stole a lightsaber-”
“Accidentally? How do you accidentally steal a lightsaber?”
“It’s a long story. Can you maybe just... I don’t know, work the force in our favour?”
She sighed fondly. “Who do I need to talk to?”
“I like her,” Wrecker tried to whisper.
Echo glared at him. “General Plo Koon.”
“I’ll holo him right now- oh wait, oh shit,” the crew heard Ahsoka ignite one of her lightsabers and deflect a couple blaster bolts. She shouted orders to Rex and the other clones who sounded like they were taking heavy fire.
“Slight inconvenience, I’ll have to holo him later. This won’t take long,” she shouted over the intense fire. “I’ll talk to you later Echo.”
The comm went silent and Echo looked worried sick.
“She’ll be fine, she’s a jedi. They don’t need anyone else’s help,” Crosshair bit out as he looked for the ignition button on the lightsaber.
“I guess- wait, Cross, what are you-”
The green sabre shot out, startling everyone except Crosshair who looked pleased with himself.
He spun it around in his right hand, getting used to the weight. “These are pretty cool.”
Hunter rolled his eyes. “Quit it Crosshair, they aren’t toys.”
“Oh, I beg to differ,” he tried to spin it in front of him, doing a terrible imitation of the jedi.
As soon as he tried to switch the blade to his left hand, the plasma sliced through the thin aiming plate attached to his shoulder. The thin plastoid plate clattered to the ground and everyone burst out laughing while Crosshair looked absolutely heartbroken, his gaze never leaving the sliced armour.
He pushed the button on the hilt and the blade retracted. The thick tension evaporated and everyone walked up the aisle to the cockpit, patting Cross on the shoulder and chuckling to themselves.
“Switching course back to Coruscant then?” Tech asked, amusement still edged in his voice.
Hunter took his seat behind Tech. “Let’s just hope Commander Tano keeps her promise."
“We are incredibly sorry for the inconvenience, it won’t ever happen again,” Hunter practically followed Plo Koon out the temple and into the gardens like a sad puppy. The Batch held in their chuckles at his behaviour, all of them purely relieved Ahsoka holoed him in time.
“There’s no inconvenience, Sargeant. The padawan who owns this sabre learned a valuable lesson.”
The group walked around a cement corner to see a little twi'lek sobbing, holding her face in her hands as another padawan had an arm around her shoulders.
Her head shot up and ran to the group, seeing her hilt in Plo’s hand.
“You know not to leave this lying around,” the general knelt on the cement.
She nodded profusely, stray tears dripping down her cheeks.
“You’ve learned your lesson, Sapher?”
She nodded again. The general offered her the blade and she snatched it up, overlooking it with a keen eye. Tech felt a little bad for the scratches he made in the metal while trying to pry it open.
The kid must’ve put 2 and 2 together to figure out the clones decked out in red and black armour were the ones who returned it. She started moving her hands and arms around in precise movements, trying to convey her thanks.
“Uh, Tech, do you know what she’s doing?” Hunter whispered.
“You don’t understand BSL?” Tech rolled his eyes. “You wouldn’t survive a day without me. She says she’s eternally grateful and she’ll always be indebted to us in the simplest terms, she’s using quite advanced phrases I doubt you’d understand.”
The girl looked very pleased with herself at his compliment and signed something back to Tech. They conversed for a few seconds more before she handed him a small circular piece of matte metal. He signed a goodbye and she ran back to her friend to tell her all about her new allies.
“We best be going then,” Hunter said to Plo Koon. They bid their thank yous and goodbyes and soon enough, they were finally en route to their next mission without any detours.
“What was that disk she gave you?” Echo asked.
“A holo. For once, I think we have an ally amidst the jedi ranks.”
“A holo that small? Impossible.”
Tech smiled slightly. “Very limited production, I’ve only heard about them from comm chatter.”
“How touching,” Cross sarcastically added, fiddling with a toothpick between his lips.
“You’re just sour cause you don’t have a levelling plate anymore,” Echo chuckled, turning his attention back to the controls.
“We’ll find someone to get it fixed,” Hunter cut in, not wanting another argument to break out.
“Fates forbid you don’t have the best sniper in the GAR watching your back.”
“From today's events, I’m not so sure I want you watching my back at all,” Echo jokingly mumbled.
Cross stood up. “Why you little-”
Hunter blew a fuse. “Enough already!”
A/N: This took so much fuc-fricking time to write!! I thought it was gonna be maybe 500, maybe 700 words, but I ended up with a 2000 word fic. Life just does that to you ig.
ANYWAYS, I hope y'all liked it, I loved writing that little Rex and Ahsoka cameo. I do want to note that this is after they rescued Echo from the Techno Union, but it's many months before the events of the Seige of Mandalore. It's also kinda a fix-it fic?? I wanted to bring ahsoka in and I was just so excited to do so that I forgot she wasn't part of the order during this time... WHOOPS
(Don't forget to drink some water right now and go eat a snack, you deserve it so much bestie ❤️❤️)
18 notes · View notes