#batfam big bang 2020
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a fanfic writer questionnaire that you should absolutely do
Filling out my own questionnaire :) For funsies.
THE BASICS
Name(s): Lurkinglurkerwholurks
Where do you post fic? AO3, with Tumblr crossposting
Primary/current fic writing fandom: BatFam
Secondary/past/rotating fic writing fandoms: MCU (3 fics) with secondary tags on the BatFam posts to Stranger Things, Tenet, and Queen’s Thief.
Are there fandoms you write for but don’t read, or vice versa? I don’t read any of those secondary tags. I don’t write but very selectively read Star Wars, Star Trek, and FMA. (I used to read TAZ but don’t anymore.)
THE STATS
How long have you been writing fics? Since March 2018. I posted my first fic that April.
How many have you written? 91 (holy cow)
How many have you posted (complete or incomplete)? 91. One of those is incomplete and one is in progress. I have fragments of a couple more, but not enough to even count as half fics.
What’s your word count by year? Not totally sure because my two big fics stretched across multiple years. According to AO3:
2018 - 83,394
2019 - 102,244
2020 - 164,370
2021 - 114,915
2022 - 79,981 (so far)
But with the understanding that Nature and Nurture (109,065) started in 2018 and ended in 2020 and The Return (52,589) started in 2020 and ended in 2021.
What was your first posted fic? Mother Bruce and His Baby Birds
If you write in more than one fandom, which is your most popular? BatFam. By far.
What is your most popular fic by bookmark? The Return. 2,496.
What is your most popular fic by subscription? Also The Return, lol. 1,171
What is your longest fic? Nature and Nurture. Word count listed above.
How long did it take you to write it? Published dates are from 5/3/2018, to 3/5/2020. SYMMETRY. I can’t remember how long that first chapter took me to write, though, and I had the last chapter written at least a week before I posted it.
What is your shortest fic? Choose - Lose. 699 words.
How long did it take you to write it? Less than a day. Maybe less than an hour, even. I kind of went into a writerly fugue state and banged it out.
How many series do you have? 14. That is so many.
Who’s your most commonly tagged character? Bruce Wayne (66)
What’s your most commonly tagged relationship (slash or &)? “Tim Drake & Bruce Wayne” and “Jason Todd & Bruce Wayne” are both tied at 16. I... don’t think I have any /.
What’s your most commonly used other tag? Whump (26). Thanks, Whumptober.
THE EMOTIONS
Was there a fic or writer who inspired you to start writing your own posted works? @audreycritter and @unpretty. Unpretty intrigued me with a Batman I didn’t hate. Audrey reeled me in with CEC. But also @starknjarvis27 because I wanted to surprise her.
What do you remember about writing your first posted fic? Nerves. So many nerves.
Is there a fic or fics you’re most proud of, and why? I answered that here and the full answer is way too long!
Is there a fic you would redo completely if you could? Mother Bruce. Not because I don’t like it (I do! very much!) but because it was my first fic ever. I’m a better writer now, for one, and also while I think that BatFam is a nice BatFam, it may not necessarily be my BatFam, you know?
Is there a specific detail (setting, interaction, quirk, dialogue) you stole from your own life to use in a fic? Oh gosh, so many. I steal little bits and pieces from people I know all the time, because those tend to be the things that give the fictional people I write about texture. “How did you ever think to make up ____.” Eh, if it’s a small things, odds are I didn’t. I can’t come up with an example right now, but when I do, I’ll ETA.
Is there a line in your fic that makes you smile/snicker/chuckle every time you remember it? I give most of my best lines to Jason, but Tim’s breeziness never fails to delight me. “His therapist would call that a red flag, but que sera sera, YOLO, and so forth” is a classic. Also Bruce’s flummoxed “Did you just try to batarang me… with me?”
Is there a line in your fic that makes you sad every time you remember it? lollllllllll. Well. I have 6 works tagged “I Made Myself Cry,” so. But Damian’s I’m sorry I was difficult. I’m sorry I didn’t know how to be a good son. I’m sorry I was such an awful brother. I’m sorry I made you so angry. Please don’t be sad for too long. Please don’t forget about me. still hits hard.
Are there any story ideas you’ve considered but are too nervous/intimidated to attempt? What are they? Yes. No spoilers, but one of these days I’m going to recreate a specific scene from a specific non-DC show that has stuck with me for years.
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name: lucy
pronouns: she/her
socials: @houser-of-stories on tumblr and HouserOfStories on ao3!
role: general mod
introduction: good morning everyone! (it’s going to be morning for someone somewhere) when I was introduced to the theme of this zine by the other mods I was immediately super interested, and I can’t wait to work on it with all of you!
although this’ll be my first time modding a zine, I’ve modded @batfam-big-bang with mel and shelby since 2020. the best part of bbb, aside from the amazing content, is the community - I’m really excited to see everyone talking on the discord server! one of my favourite video games is sky: children of the light because the graphics are just beautiful. I remember when I played it for the first time I was completely drawn in.
I hope you have as much fun along the way as I’ll be having, seeing what this project becomes. see you soon!
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For @anakinthetrashking‘s lovely Tim-centric fic, ‘How's The Heart?’ for @batfam-big-bang! It’s my first time joining a fandom event and I had so much fun drawing this(especially the tiny details), thank you so much for letting me have the honour of working with you!
[ID under cut]
[IMAGE ID: Tim, Cass, and Stephanie are snuggled together, leaning back against white pillows in an elaborate blanket and pillow fort. There are five small, glowing, black bat symbols hanging from the sheet behind Tim, Cass, and Steph. There are also yellow stringed lights that are hung throughout the fort. From the viewer's POV, Cass is on the right, Tim is in the middle, and Steph is on the left. All three look happy and relaxed. Steph is wearing a purple shortsleeve shirt, black yoga pants, her blonde hair is being worn down, and she has her head resting comfortably on Tim's shoulder. Her fingernails are painted purple and she is reading a magazine with two dark haired figures on the cover, one in a white and grey horizontally striped shirt and the other in a slightly darker grey-blue shirt. The magazine is titled, "HEYBABYBIRD," which is the artist's username/signature. Tim is wearing a blue-green sweater with a greenish stripe on the sleeves and chest. He has a soft smile on his face as he looks over Steph's shoulder, seemingly also reading the magazine, and he has his knees pulled up underneath a white blanket with warm grey stripes. Cass is also under this blanket and she is leaning against Tim's left shoulder with her right shoulder. Her dark, shoulder-length hair is being worn down, and she is wearing a black hoodie with yellow drawstrings and two yellow patches stitched onto the left sleeve that are in the shape of a bat symbol.
There are snacks and more magazines on top of the white and grey striped blanket. In front of Steph is an open box of Pocky with three sticks poking out. Near Tim's feet is an additional box of unopened Pocky. In front of Cass, there is an open, yellow bag of "original" "Potato" chips, and a few chips are strewn on the blanket. Also in front of Cass is an unopened package of Oreos, and two magazines overlapping each other. The bottom magazine on the right has a dark periwinkle background, a hot pink border, a white counter along the bottom, what looks like two coffee beans, and a white cup with a dark brown liquid in it. The magazine is labeled, "BEAN SOUP". The top magazine on the left, has a blue, grey, and white, tiered background with the picture of a shiny butt in black spandex. The title of the magazine is "ASS WEEKLY," but it is partially covered by the Oreos, so all we can read is, "ASS." The tagline in the bottom right corner of this magazine reads, "Top 10 Superhero butts!" END ID]
#batfam big bang 2020#tim drake#stephanie brown#cassandra cain#doodles#pls look at the magazine cover it's nightwing's ass hahahahaha
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Another piece for the @batfam-big-bang, this time with a cute lil fluffy Timkon for all of you based on the wholesome “A Non-Offensive, Tasteful, Conventional Show” by the incredible @incorrectbatfam!!
#digital art#fanart#draw#dc#dc comics#dc universe#batman#batfam#robin#red robin#timothy drake#tim drake#drake#conner kent#superboy#kon el#timkon#batfam big bang 2020
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my piece for @mininacl‘s fic surely you must know (how much i love you so) for @batfam-big-bang
[IMAGE ID: Tim Drake and Connor Kent are sitting in a booth at Batburger fast food restaurant. Connor sits at the back under a window with a flashing pink and blue Batburger neon sign, calling out Tim’s name to get his attention. Sitting across from Connor is Tim deep in thought as he stares at Kon with hearts in his eyes. Both Tim and Kon have a tray of burger and fries in front of them. Next to their booth are yellow pink and green windows themed after Zsasz, Joker and The Riddler. at the front of the room is a big green plant and a red welcome mat.]
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Illustrations for @mininacl fic surely you must know (how much i love you so) for @batfam-big-bang
Check it out on AO3 or tumblr !
TOP IMAGE ID: Tim Drake and Cassandra Cain are sitting at a table together. Cass is sitting cross-legged in the booth, wearing a dark halter and eating strawberries. Tim is to her left, watching her eat, his hands cradling a mug. Cass is wearing a dark halter top while Tim is in a loose black t-shirt and black jeans. The image is mostly in gray tones, though there is a soft orange light coming from a window behind Tim, and both Tim's mug and Cass' strawberries are a deep red. END ID
BOTTOM IMAGE ID: Tim Drake and Conner Kent are sitting together in a car. They have a blanket thrown across their laps, which is littered with multicolored glow sticks. Kon is in a dark t-shirt and leather jacket while Tim wears a button-up beneath a sweater, the collar showing from beneath. The image is mostly dark, done in gray tones, with a soft lighting coming from above where the camera would be and from the colorful glowsticks in their laps. Kon is holding three glowsticks in one hand and has two wrapped as bracelets around his other wrist, which Tim is holding. Kon is looking at Tim as Tim presses a kiss to the back of Kon's hand. END ID
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This is my second contribution to @batfam-big-bang – for @nycis‘ fic, Time Loops. The fic will be posted on their blog as well as their AO3. It’s a really neat story that features Steph as the heroine, who manages to save the entire bat family from the Cluemaster’s schemes. I had a lot of fun reading it and working on this piece!!
Image ID below the cut.
EDIT: The fic was renamed to Rewind and I didn't realize, I'm very sorry for the mix up!
[IMAGE ID: The image is set in an abstract, geometrical space. A misshapen purple alarm clock with missing hands is stretched from the top left corner to the bottom right corner. Stephanie Brown, the Spoiler, is free-falling through the scene, with her arms outstretched and her purple cape billowing behind her. Coffee is spilling from her floating eggplant mug in the bottom left corner, and a few waffles are scattered in the top right corner of the image. Steph, with determination in her blue eyes, is looking up toward the gothic mirror falling alongside her. In the mirror is her father, the Cluemaster, looking down at her with the same blue eyes, and with his hand clasped at his back. The scene is reminiscent of the rabbit hole in Alice in Wonderland. END ID.]
#batfam big bang 2020#dc#batfam#stephanie brown#spoiler#cluemaster#dick grayson#tim drake#jason todd#cassandra cain#damian wayne#bruce wayne#batman#myart#fanart
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Participated in @batfam-big-bang ; Art for the fic of @yellow-warbler: Extremity on AO3. Image descriptions under the cut.
[ID #1: The image consists of 2 characters standing in the center: on the right is joker, holding is hand in front of him, palm up, pointing to the child on the left, who is Joker Jr. aka Tim Drake. They both are smiling and are wearing te DCAU Joker suit. They look slightly at something on the left of the audience. On the top left corner of the image is a grey panel, with a bat symbol on the upper left corner, that reads: "He tortured Tim, Wally. Used everything He vould think of to break my son. and it worked... END ID]
[ID #2: This image consists of 6 panels on a white background. The first one, starting from the upper left, is a speech bubble next to a Flash symbol that reads: "Thank, J. Ah, Alfred. it smells amazing." The next three panels shows Tim, only the bottom of his face and his shoulders showing, wearing a red T-shirt: the first of the three is Tim, drawn in a 3/4 view looking to the left, getting startled by the dialogue; in the panel following, Tim starts giggling (same view); on the last one of the three, Tim is fully laughing, this time he is shown in a profile view, his mouth wide open and a few "Hahaha"'s colored green with neon purple shadows coming out of it. The fifth panel is a close-up to one of Tim's blue eye, a single tear in the corner of it, his eyebrow drawn down. It ends with a text panel reading a few "sorry"'s surrounded by the same previous "Hahaha"'s. END ID]
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For @battoad ‘s fic “Ember Island Players” which was written for this years @batfam-big-bang !! It’s the Batfam set in the atla world and they’re all together at Ember Island ;) It was so much fun working on this piece! If you’d like to check out Auri’s fic and all the other amazing works head on over to https://archiveofourown.org/collections/bbb20 !!
(IDs under the cut! Again huge thanks to @stormleviosa for writing this!!)
[IMAGE ID: Image shows 2 pictures, one smaller and one larger. The larger image shows a young man in green and yellow swimming trunks building a sand castle. It is Jason Todd. He has black hair with a white streak in the front and a slit through his right eyebrow. His tongue is poking out slightly as he concentrates. In his left hand, he holds a small spade aloft and his right is smoothing sand. He has one leg on either side of his sandcastle. Next to him is a small wooden bucket. His sand castle is elaborate with several spires and staircases and a brickwork pattern. There is a driftwood door or moat and six arched windows. Facing him is Damian Wayne, with darker skin and brown hair, wearing a dark red tunic and shorts with gold edging. He kneels next to his sandcastle, with one hand between his knees. He is grinning mischievously and pointing at Jason, fire shooting from his finger. In the foreground, next to Damian’s left leg is a small spade, identical to Jason’s. Behind him is a matching wooden bucket. Damian’s castle is less solid than Jason’s, though it still has spires and arches. There are many windows and these glow yellow, as if lit from within. In the background is a bright blue sky with wispy clouds and clear blue waves. The sand is closer to orange or yellow than white. In the bottom left corner is a dark blue signature reading @abisalli. Underneath this picture is a second, smaller, picture with a black border. It has a red background and shows the upper bodies of Jason and Damian in an anime style. Both are angry. Their eyes are missing and their mouths are white squares. They have yellow stripes radiating from their heads to indicate anger. Jason has one fist raised and Damian has his hands on his hips. Jason’s sandcastle is on fire. END ID]
#batfam big bang 2020#jason todd#Damian Wayne#red hood#robin#dc comics#atla#my art#digital art#again thanks to jess for writing this ID you are literally a lifesaver#and also thanks to auri for being so so so patient with me asdfghj#batfamily
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here is my final piece of art for @batfam-big-bang which is from the incredible @darlinglissa‘s fic “you’re under fire (i’ll cover you)” which you can check out here! i had so much fun working on this and being able to contribute to this absolutely amazing fic!
(image description under the cut)
[Image ID: Image shows a front view of three people sitting on a tan couch, with wide widows behind them and a bookshelf overflowing with books beside them. On the other side is a lamp, and in front is a coffee table with a stack of books and box of half-eaten pizza. On the right side of the couch is Jason Todd, wearing a pajama shirt with the wonder woman symbol on it and a dark jacket. He’s smiling and looking at Tim, who is in the middle. Tim is wearing a dark blue shirt and jeans with bandages poking out at the collar. He is also smiling. Steph is sitting crosslegged on the left end of the couch in purple crop top and yellow shorts. She’s caught in the middle of a laugh, and is holding a book. END ID]
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So I had the pleasure of doing some pieces for @batfam-big-bang; this one is for @the-imaginative-fox‘s lovely fic Temporary!!! Very good baby Dick Grayson and Batdad content, ten out of ten would recommend.
Stay tuned for several more Big Bang posts in the near future!!
Image description below the cut!
[IMAGE ID: The background of the image is that of a circus tent with red and yellow stripes. Curving up from the bottom of the image in a v shape is Batman's cape. Surrounding the cape is about a dozen small black silhouettes of bats which are drawn in the style of batarangs. In the top of the image two black semicircles cut through the right and left corners. The two semicircles make it so that the red and yellow stripes of the circus tent appear to be in the shape of a traditional circus tent. In the semicircle seen in the top left corner two male figures wearing black and white tuxedos are standing. The figure standing closest to the front of the image has a long black tie, while the figure standing further away has a bow tie. Both of the male figures are wearing white masks that cover their faces, and the masks have features reminiscent of an owl. In the semicircle seen in the top right corner are two female figures. The one standing closest to the front of the image has long brown hair, a dark red dress, and two grey necklaces. The figure standing further away has a purple dress and short blonde hair. Both of the female figures are wearing white masks that cover their faces, and the masks have features reminiscent of an owl. Hanging from the top center of the image is a trapeze with a brown handle. Cutting above the trapeze is the word "Temporary" written in all caps in a clean white font. Hanging from the trapeze is Robin. Robin is wearing elbow length green gloves, a yellow cape, green pixie boots, short scaley green shorts, and a red torso piece that has green sleeves and yellow accents on the collar and across the torso, with the Robin "R" in a patch on his upper right chest. He is also wearing a yellow utility belt and a black domino mask with white eye pieces. He has short but shaggy black hair, and his facial expression is solemn. END ID]
#batfam big bang 2020#dick grayson#robin#court of owls#my art#i enjoy this fic greatly#and i also enjoyed this piece greatly#i miss being on the trapeze and i will draw my feelings out
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my second participation in @batfam-big-bang !! this is for @anakinthetrashking's fic How's the Heart? !!
[IMAGE ID: Tim Drake and Bruce Wayne are kneeling. The background is a medium gray, darker beneath them like a shadow. Tim is wearing a white sweater, black leggings with a stripe, and socks; Bruce is in a loose gray t-shirt and dark gray sweatpants. Tim is slumped over, leaning against Bruce, who is holding him against his chest, one hand in his hair and the other holding Tim's hand against his chest. They both have tear tracks down their cheeks; Tim's eyes are squeezed closed while Bruce just looks at Tim, eyes sad. END ID]
#my art#fanart#dc comics#tim drake#red robin#bruce wayne#batman#batfam#batfam big bang 2020#digital art
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My first contribution for the Batfam Big Bang 2020 event! This drawing is for @xvivon‘s fic You’re Not Alone In The Dark! Please check it out, it’s awesome!!
All the other arts for this fic and contributions to this event can be found from @batfam-big-bang !!
Image ID under read more:
[IMAGE ID: Damian Wayne and Alfred Pennyworth are sitting in a lavish, red room. The walls are an ornate wallpaper with dark picture frames. We only see Alfred's arm and hand; he is wearing a black suit with white gloves. Damian sits across from him, looking down at a chessboard and cradling a steaming mug to his chest. Damian's face is very stylized, eyes wide with shock, nose small and mouth slightly open. He's in a dark green sweater, and his hair is dark and pushed upwards. In the lower left is a white signature reading "@jassus". END ID]
#Damian Wayne#Alfred Pennyworth#dc#batman#batfam#batfam big bang 2020#my art#((Everyone has made really cool creations#((I really reccomend checking them out! :D
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As my last entry to the @batfam-big-bang we have the most amazing writing piece by @transdickgraysn ! It’s been really fun working together with him, be sure to check his fanfic:
I See No Tragedy
« Dick becomes a double below-knee amputee, adapts, and thrives »
IMAGE ID: Dick Grayson reclines on a chandelier in Wayne Manor. The background shows a fire place with a fire burning, and the fireplace itself is a light red. The cieling is a darker red. Dick has dark skin, curly black hair, and blue eyes. His right eye is shut in a wink. He sits on the gold chandelier, reclining with his elbow lifted against the center of the chandelier. He is a double below-knee amputee, his legs ending about four inches below his knees. He's wearing gray athletic shorts and a black tank top. He's smiling. Along the gold of the chandelier that he sits on there are five lights. Draping down from where the chandelier is fixed to the ceiling, and gathering together beneath the gold part of the chandelier, are thousands of small white crystals. END ID
#digital art#draw#fanart#dc#dc comics#dc universe#batman#batfam#robin#dick grayson#richard grayson#nightwing#batfam big bang 2020
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Summary: Jason Todd was raised on the streets, in Gotham’s filth, but the blood that was running through his veins was everything but. Jason was the last of a line of gruesome, death stained mages, necromancers who dealt in souls and flickering images of immortality. Jason was a fifteen-year-old boy who crawled out of his grave, weeks after he died, reanimated by powers he couldn’t understand or control, and struggled to feel alive even when his father was holding onto him.
AN: I finally get to post my @batfam-big-bang fanfic! I My lovely beta readers for this wonderful project were @nycis and @queerbutstillhere while my amazing artists were @darkmagyk and @paperedking and @zannakai. Check out their stunning pieces!!!
Read on AO3
I had a night I had a day
I did one million stupid things
I said one billion foolish things
I'm not okay
If there are two emotions Jason knows well, they are fear and anger. Both had accompanied him since his earliest childhood memories. His father’s shouting had been a constant source of anger and fear. His loud voice had forced Jason to hide beneath the table, his bed, the closet, all spaces he had falsely assumed would be too small for his father to reach. With bated breath he had waited for the screeching to stop until only his mother’s soft sobs had echoed through the rooms. Those too had angered Jason. He didn’t know whether it was on her behalf, because he had hated his father so much for causing her any pain, or because that anger had been for himself, the poor child whose mother wasn’t strong enough to leave her piece of shit husband.
On the streets, anger had kept him warm at night and fear had ensured he stayed alive. He had marveled at the shiny tires of the Batmobile, but even then, deep down, he had been so incredibly angry. He was going hungry while another drove a car like that. He had ignored his fear then and stolen the tires regardless.
It had been the best decision of his life.
So now, when once again he was stuck between fear and anger, he chose to dismiss his fear and lash out instead.
“You can’t be serious!” Jason hissed, throwing up his arms.
Rage boiled beneath his skin like an active volcano. It infected his voice, his stance. He rose to his full height, making him the tallest in the room, but none of his siblings even blinked at it. They were too used to such simpleminded intimidation tactics, employed similar ones in front of villains who thought they could get the better of them.
“This is the right way,” Dick said, his voice strained with finality, a kind of authority he had no right to evoke.
He was not their leader, and he sure as hell was not their father. Dick barely understood what Jason was capable of and when he did, was too scared of it. The others didn’t see it, but Jason knew a coward when he saw one. Dick always tip-toed around Jason’s room like he expected the undead to crawl right out of it and drag him into a bloody casket. Beyond that, he also always took the patrol routes far away from Jason’s apartment complex and city district. Jason didn’t mind, he preferred it when the others kept their noses out of the Narrows and Crime Alley. His people didn’t particularly enjoy it either when the other bats and birds came around to play there as they tended to mess with the wards and ask uncomfortable questions. Jason understood too well how unsettling his presence could be and therefore knew very well that Dick had no room to make such decisions or judge Jason for them.
“The right way,” Jason repeated. “Do you even hear yourself? If everything was right, Bruce would still be here!”
Tim and Steph both winced when Jason said his name and even Dick’s face fell. They all didn’t understand it. Death was so final to them instead of just another state of being, one that Jason could reverse.
“I can bring him back,” Jason continued, desperation seeping into his voice. “Everything will be alright again. It’s all in these books. I just need your help.”
Why couldn’t his siblings just understand that he would fix it and then everything would go back to being the way it was before Darkseid had torn their lives to shreds. The Cave had become messy since Bruce’s death. It had been barely a month ago but it already showed despite best efforts. Jason had dragged all his books here to study and take notes, the constant hum of the technology as much a motivational hymn as it was a lullaby. His notes now were spread out all across the table, proudly displaying the work Dick was disregarding so very easily.
Dick only stubbornly shook his head. “No, Bruce wouldn’t want that.”
This wasn’t about what Bruce wanted, he was dead. This was simply about deciding how they were going to fix it.
“You don’t know that,” Jason countered. “It’s not like he wrote it in his will.”
Dick let out a low breath and dragged his hands through his hair as if Jason were causing him a headache. They had attended the reading of the will just hours before. Alfred had made sure they had all dressed up in proper suits the way they had for the closed casket funeral because there hadn’t been a body to recover. It would make it all more difficult to bring Bruce back without his original body to tie his soul too, but Jason was confident that he would be able to pull it off. Jason had only listened half-heartedly to the reading of the will. He knew its contents by heart, they all did. Every hero had a will set up and about ten proxies who knew every word and could recite it in case their death had been unnatural.
Alfred had been given custody over Damian while Tim had been emancipated. The Wayne fortune had been split five ways between Dick, Jason, Tim, Cass, and Damian while Steph and Barbara both got a huge stipend. It was all for nothing, Bruce would be back. Cass knew it as well, or so Jason hoped. She hadn’t even bothered to show for the funeral but had left the city the night before. Jason wished she had stayed, she would support him.
Instead, Jason had to make everyone else listen to him.
Tim was still straight up in denial and didn’t believe that Bruce was dead. His parents had died around the same time, just two years earlier. Of course, he wouldn’t be able to handle it and escape into his delusions instead. Steph, for all that she was a part of the team and family, Jason’s closest confidant out of all of them, had chosen to stay neutral while Dick protested vehemently.
Damian, meanwhile, just thought that Jason wouldn’t be able to pull it off, but that could be blamed on his superiority complex. While the kid, a perfect mix of Talia and Bruce, could imitate Bruce’s accent and body language as well as he wanted to, he still reeked of al Ghul arrogance and the Lazarus pit’s side effects. It was a foul stench, poisonous, and foreign to this world. It had hurt Bruce when Jason had told him what exactly was keeping Damian’s heart beating, but there was nothing that could be done about it. It wasn’t like anybody else besides Jason actually noticed.
“Had he wanted to, we would know,” Dick said.
“But-“
“Jason, stop.” Dick’s order, his tone couldn’t be mistaken for anything but a bark, was harsh. “Bruce is dead and he will stay dead. You will not experiment on his soul just because you think you can bring him back.”
“I don’t think so, I know so,” Jason argued. “You’re just incapable of trusting me! You still think I’m a foolish kid who is just playing around with powers he doesn’t understand!”
His voice rose with every shouted word. It had always been like this. Dick thinking that Jason was crossing too many lines, wasn’t good enough to be Robin or anything. Hell, he had accepted Tim more readily as Robin than he ever had Jason.
“Jason-“ Tim tried to speak up, but was harshly cut off by Dick.
Trust big brother to always know best.
“Because you are!” Dick shouted back. It hurt, cut into flesh like sharp knives, but at the same time it was liberating. Finally, Dick was actually speaking his mind. Honesty, so Jason had learned, was the only way to keep moving forward. They all lied, it was a part of their training, came as natural as breathing, but there was a line you had to be aware of.
“Bruce is dead and you can’t let go. Instead of helping me figure out how to keep Gotham running, you run off and bury your head in old books to find a solution to a problem that isn’t there! He’s gone. I needed you on patrol tonight and you didn’t show.”
Patrol had been just fine, Dick hadn’t needed him. Jason had kept an eye on the comms, they had done as good as they could with three men down. It hadn’t even been a busy night.
“You’re just giving up!”
“And you’re delusional!” Dick retorted.
He picked up one of the pages the closest to him. The originally white paper was covered by ink stains, diagrams smeared uncaringly all over it while Jason had been trying to figure out what exactly his ancestors had gotten up to when they tried to raise the dead.
“This is too much, Jason. You’re only setting yourself up for my failure. I let you keep researching because I thought it would help, but it’s only hurting you. You have to let go.”
“And leave?” Jason spat out. “Like you always do the moment something goes wrong with Bruce?”
Dick froze. His annoyance and misguided worry slowly twisted into dark anger. At that moment, it just felt right. Dick had ceased pretending that he was so much better than them, that he wasn’t struggling without Bruce around. Jason loathed how he sat at breakfast every day, acting as if it was all still alright and fine, smiling and lying continuously.
“I-“ Dick interrupted himself, reigning in his anger as everybody else watched him with keen eyes. “No, no, I’m not having this discussion with you. None of us are on board with your reckless endeavor, so you’re not doing it and that’s final.”
Jason turned to look at the rest of his family, but they were all averting their eyes. Of course, they would all side with Dick over him. He was older, more experienced, the first Robin out of all of them.
He wasn’t the resurrected boy who talked to ghosts and turned living beings to worthless decay with nothing more than a touch.
“I see,” Jason replied and grabbed his jacket from the chair.
Fine, it wasn’t like he needed any of them anyway. It would have been easier with more living anchors, but Batman had left his mark all over the city. Gotham was his, even the magic that buried itself so far underground that hardly anybody could see it knew who it belonged to. Jason had plenty of anchors he could use to bring Bruce back. What were five children compared to an entire city?
“Where are you going?” Tim spoke up. He had barely said a word since Jason and Dick had started fighting, but Jason supposed that it made sense given that Tim thought both of them were wrong.
“Away from here,” Jason replied. “Since Dick is so keen on running this show himself, he can do it. I’m out.”
“What?” Steph asked. “Wait! Jason, no, you have to stay!”
“What I need to do is fix this.”
Jason picked his backpack up from the ground and started stuffing his papers into it. He didn’t particularly care in which order he did it, he would have to sort through them all anyway once he was back in his apartment. He needed to toss those that were trash and copy the calculations and incantations that actually made sense and seemed like they were a good first step onto fresh sheets. Maybe he should get actual parchment. He didn’t usually work with dead writing materials, but with whatever he had on hand. His spells were powerful enough without, but he couldn’t afford any mistakes here.
Once he was finished, he threw his backpack over his shoulder and headed towards his bike, not sparing the group behind him another glance.
“Jason,” Dick started once more.
Jason just threw his hands up, dismissing him.
“Don’t worry, Richard,” he said. “It’s not like I can stay dead for long if something goes wrong. Don’t bother contacting me. I’ll come back once I’m finished.”
He couldn’t see his older brother’s reaction, but Jason would bet that he had flinched. They all hated to be reminded of Jason’s death, but it wasn’t like Jason could erase that part of him.
Jason put on his bright red helmet and turned on his bike. Then, without looking back, he drove off, disappearing into the dawn of a new day.
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