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#batfamily
shyestofhearts · a day ago
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You can't convince me that Damian wouldn't insist he's everyone's favorite but the reasons get more wild and outlandish as he goes on just for the fun of it
Just
"Of course I'm Todd's favorite, we made a blood pact that one time!"
Jason, who has no recollection of ever doing such a thing (with their own blood): "it's true, we did"
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oifaaa · 21 hours ago
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It's my humble opinion that everyone should draw Star Sapphire Jason at least once
Bonus:
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incorrectbatfam · 2 days ago
Cassandra: *walks in wearing a pink shirt*
Tim: Oh my God.
Dick: Cass is wearing pink! Cass is wearing pink!
Jason: Are we sure it’s not just a white shirt that’s been bloodied in a motorcycle crash?
Duke: Or maybe it isn't her. Does she have a twin sister?
Damian: If Cain had a twin she would have eaten them in the womb.
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thestarsarecool · 2 days ago
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I’m sorry but this is so funny.
Nightwing 2021 Annual
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poseidumb · 2 days ago
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Tim and Damian trying to stick it through one of Bruce’s gala events. You can best believe that Tim tells Jason about this immediately afterwards while Damian screeches denial in the background
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codenamed-queenie · 2 days ago
Tim: *frantically trying to assemble a 3D puzzle in front of batcomputer*
Jason [walking up]: Holy phony, Batman, you're CHEATING!
Tim: Pfft, no!
Tim: *turns off the screen*
Jason [smirking]: You're looking up ways to solve that stupid puzzle that Dick and I solved but YOU DIDN'T!
Tim [abandoning any pretended nonchalance]: How'd you do it, pea brain!?
Jason: *smirks wider*
Tim [throws the puzzle to the ground]: AAAH
Tim: WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME!? Maybe Dr. Palmer's right, maybe I don't have what it takes to clone the human genome!
Tim [screaming]: *Chucks the puzzle across the Cave*
Jason: Stop! Stop that!
Tim [freezing]: ...?
Jason: After I solved the puzzle, I wanted to make sure you couldn't, so...I broke a few pieces, glued some others together...
Tim: ...
Jason: It can't be solved.
Tim: *eye twitching*
Tim [tackling Jason]: I'VE HAD NIGHTMARES OVER THAT PUZZLE!
Tim [getting Jason into a headlock]: I CRIED ABOUT IT IN THERAPY!
Jason [struggling]: Not the hair! It's gonna frizz! You fuc--
Dick [running up]: Hey!
Dick [ripping his brothers apart]: What the hell, guys? Break it up!
Tim [sulking]: Jason's not playing fair!
Dick [crossing his arms]: Yeah, well, you made him feel dumb, and he acts like it doesn't bother him, but it does.
Dick: And Jason--
Jason: *pouts*
Dick: You know better than to mess with someone so uptight! What do we always say?
Jason [deadpan]: Don't break Tim. He's our safety net.
Dick [gently smacks Jason upside the head]: Don't forget it. Now, you both need to calm down. Jason, walk it off.
Jason: *storms off*
Dick: *sighs in relief*
Dick: ...
Dick: Timmy?
Tim [still scowling]: What?
Dick: *horrified squeak* I'm turning into Bruce.
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theundeadrobinclub · 2 days ago
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all of the batfam members have 100% drank out of Damians cup of paint water. i take no criticism on this. they are all disasters. even Damian has drank out of his own cup of paint water.
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kayjayo1227 · 2 days ago
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You really gave steph the muscles in that b99 meme god bless 🙏
You mean this one?
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Hehe my girl deserve the muscles 💪🏻
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sohotthateveryonedied · 2 days ago
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something i've been thinkin about: yj!nightwing showing up on infinity island demanding his brother, but not specifying which one, and finding out that the one he wasn't trying to track down either exists or is still alive?
dick, rolling up to infinity island after losing tim at the park: hey, i'm looking for my brother? black hair, blue eyes, kind of annoying, answers to "robin"?
ra's: oh yeah i got you *brings out an amnesiac jason todd with a baby leash* here you go
dick: ...............ok thanks
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babybird-batfan · 2 days ago
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Bedazzling suit that talias wearing 😭
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batshit-birds · 2 days ago
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Bog, my they/them bestie, your headcanons always make me smile. Have any random ones you want to share? (About anything. In universe your AUs, all of it.)
i always have headcanons to share <3 my brain never shuts up <3
- Tim is a cat person full stop. Dogs are okay, but he doesn't go out of his way to pet one if he sees them. His stance on them is "they're cute but I wouldn't own one". Meanwhile he sees a cat and spends twenty minutes trying to befriend it before someone drags him away
- all animals tend to ignore/avoid/dislike Tim for literally no reason
- Damian is way more comfortable with affection / in general when he's with his friends
- on a similar vein he 100% grows up to be a hugger. The people he loves will receive affection. They have no say in the matter
- Duke and Damian share a little art studio space. Most of it is an art studio, but it has a mini library / nook area with comfy chairs and tables and all kinds of stationary for Duke's writing and poetry
- Duke writes fanfiction. He has a secret Ao3 (tho he started out on Fanfic.net and Wattpad) that he will take to his grave
- Duke has one of those Tumblr blogs that are super aesthetic where only poetry & quotes & stuff like that are posted/rb-ed
- One time Jason and Duke accidentally went to the same slam poetry session. As soon as they recognized each other they could see the light drain from the other's eyes
- Cass regularly drags Tim along to ballet classes, even though he's shit at it and has no sense of rhythm. She says she brings him so that he gets out of the house and might learn something, but really she just finds his lack of dancing talent hysterical
- Dick has a tradition of bringing each Robin to an open swing night at least once. Jason went a couple times (and has attended some on his own since coming back to Gotham), Tim went once and somehow managed to trip five people (he never went back), Steph went and got addicted (she went post-Robin & Damian was there too), and Damian goes every other weekend (usually with Steph or Dick or both)
- Dick crochets
- Damian also crochets. He learned after he watched Dick make a squishy little robin
- this has turned into me thinking about Dick and Damian bonding oh no
- nvm normal brain is back
- have I mentioned that I wholeheartedly believe Tim smokes weed? He buys expensive pipes off of Esty and finds dealers on Tinder. That one time in comics where he gave a speech about not doing weed? He was high
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incorrectbatfam · a day ago
Cullen: *watching TV*
Dick: Ah, you're watching Sailor Moon? I love that anime. The way they just–
Dick: *clenches fist*
Dick: Sail all those fricking moons.
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thestarsarecool · 2 days ago
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Bruce Wayne is canonically Jewish or at least practices Jewish cultural traditions. This has been a PSA.
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gotham-gargoyle · 2 hours ago
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Inspired by this post
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fanaticalthings · 17 hours ago
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I've always wondered how Jason would be publicly integrated back into the family without it seeming suspicious as fuck (because let's be real, legally reviving your son who turns out to not actually be dead is gonna be real hard to explain to the public)
So instead of going through all the hassle of paperwork and a cover story, what if Jason just sorta...popped back into the family without any explanation whatsoever?
But instead of explaining his reappearance, Jason just doesn't fucking say anything and acts like the once dead Wayne kid suddenly being alive isn't the biggest fucking deal in Gotham right now
and when someone tries to approach him he just looks at them wide-eyed and says in his most startled voice "...you can SEE me?"
and then the second the person takes their eyes off him he just ✨disappears✨ (because bat powers obviously) and it freaks everyone the fuck out
and when the other batkids get interviewed they just put up their best act of pretending they have no idea what anyone's talking about
Reporter: Mr. Drake, what do you have to say about the impossible return of your late brother?"
Tim: Who?
Reporter: ...
their performances range from straight up ignorance to dramatically bursting into tears whenever someone brings up the topic
Reporter: Do you have anything to say about the recent events surrounding Jason Todd?"
[Cue Dick letting out the most obnoxious wail possible and crying all over the reporter]
Reporter: Oh-I didn't mean to upse-
Dick: I just wish I was there for him more when he was alive, yknow?
Reporter: Ah, well-
Dick: And sometimes I wonder what he would've been like now...All grown up and going to college...[more fucking sobbing]
Reporter whispering under their breath: What the fuck is going on
everyone stopped asking Dick after that.
these shenanigans get so ridiculous to the point where Jason's even started standing RIGHT NEXT to his siblings whenever they're in public and they just pretend like he isn't even fucking there
it's come to the point where ghost!Jason (?) even has his own wiki page where people just talk about his weird ass appearances and the possibilities of him being a cryptid
and oh yeah this all happens during the span of one week while Bruce is (conveniently) off world
when he comes back he's just met with half of Gotham in hysterics over his dead son and theorizing if the Waynes are being haunted and he has absolutely zero clue about what the fuck is going on
he first finds out from an interviewer asking him how he feels about his ghost son and how any of this is even possible
but I imagine that Bruce's brain kinda short circuits and the only thing he's processing right now is that Jason is back in the family and he just starts tearing up like, "My son is back in the family? He loves me? 🥺"
and everyone in Gotham is like Mr. Wayne did you miss the fucking part where your DEAD son is just ALIVE again and just chilling around the city??
anyways you CANNOT tell me Jason wouldn't use this opportunity to pull the biggest prank in Gotham history like that boy LIVES for drama
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arguablysomaya · a day ago
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Bruce: And what do we say when life disappoints us?
Duke: Called it.
Jason: As the prophecy foretold...
Cass: Steph did it.
Tim: Time to fist fight a god.
Bruce:
Bruce: *sniffs* I'm so proud.
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