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#batman movies

Hi so I realized that superhero movies are dope and I’d like to watch all of them. I know there are both the Andrew Garfield and the Toby McGuire Spider-Man’s… and I’m planning on watching the fantastic 4 movies. (The ones with Chis Evans and also the one with Micheal B Jordan.)

But I’m wondering

Out of the Batman movies

Because there are like

A

Million

Batman movies

Which ones are good

And by good I mean interesting and not all about manpain and Being Gritty for the sake of being taken seriously by white male fans.

So yes as a lady person who doesnt want to poke the new DC Batman and Superman movies with a 6 foot stick… what Batman movies are recommendable?

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who else is excited for this new batman movie I cant wait, from the trailer I can already see that riddler is in it and so is penguin. Towards the end it looks like the jokers henchman are there so will the joker be in this? 

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I’m a simple person. All I want is a movie where emo Bruce Wayne goes to Gala’s with his band of adopted vigilante kids, Alfred teaching him how to parent and his love interest is a thief.

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           Live-action, cinematic Batman battle royale:

Michael Keaton Batman

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Originally posted by ultrakillblast

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Val Kilmer Batman

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Originally posted by dcmultiverse

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George Clooney Batman 

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Originally posted by mizworldofrandom

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Christian Bale Batman

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Originally posted by coruscant-sky

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Ben Affleck Batman 

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Originally posted by wwprice1

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Robert Pattinson Batman

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Originally posted by dcmultiverse

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I love Tim Burton’s Batman movies

No seriously, they’re way under appreciated and deserve a renaissance!

Jack Nicholson being an absolutely terrifying Joker (least I still think so)

That scene in the art museum set to KISS by Prince!

That Catwoman suit!!!

Danny DeVito biting off noses!

Tommy Lee Jones being BEYOND EXTRA! Like seriously everyone sees him as grumpy,but he was so extra as Two/face, that he was able to keep up with JIM CARREY! Speaking of…

JIM CARREY IN ALL THOSE RIDDLER OUTFITS JFC!

The women were like Bond women, but still capable! Michelle Pfeiffer, Nicole Kidman, Alicia Silverstone, UMA THURMAN!

We actually get a Robin!!!

AND A BATGIRL!!

Alfred is loved

The STYLE, the AESTHETIC!! It’s so bright and big and sparkly ALL THE TIME JUST EXTRA EXTRA EXTRANESS CONSTANTLY

GOTHAM is IMO, MAGNIFICENT I love all the shots of the city Skyline we get with all the statues.

The gadgets! THE BATMOBILE! The suits…idgaf give me Bat nipples! Least the costumes were equally sexy for all genders

I seriously could go on and on but…I’m watching the movies rn!

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Top part was where she sent me a tiktok video of how one part of her wants twilight world and the other wants Harry Potter (Cedric) world.

Get better soon Patts

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I’m sorry but was anyone ever going to tell me that Bruce once dressed up as Hawkman and completely nailed the look? Like Hoo-Boy, didn’t know I needed this in my life but now that I’ve seen it… I NEED it.

Please note that Hawkman’s wings aren’t a part of his costume but are physically attached to him.

I would also like to point out that Bruce dressing up as Hawkman took place immediately after him and Superman battled Hawkman and Shazam in the middle of a desert. So this implies either, A) Bruce ripped Hawkman’s wings off and attached them to himself (which would be savage af) OR B) Bruce had a pair of immitation Hawkman wings at home just in case he needed them (which would totally be a thing Bruce would do) AND he made Superman go fly to his cave and get them for him (which is honestly so domestic and I love it)

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I actually think about the Batman movies a lot actually and I will now rank them because I really love arbitrary lists and rankings

Honorable Mentions because I haven’t see them:

Adam West Batman Movie- I yearn to see this but not enough to actively seek it out.

The Dark Knight- yeah I know it’s allegedly the best I don’t care I have no desire to watch it ever

Actual list:

7. Batman vs Superman: Dawn of Justice- I cannot forgive this movie for being indirectly responsible for Snyder cut fans and also I’ve never seen it but it seems convoluted and I don’t like Lex in it

6. The Dark Knight Returns- this movie is so goddamn boring and if that’s not enough they whitewashed Bane. I appreciate it for showing Bane as a really intelligent guy like he is in the comics but at what cost. And I know it’s been beaten to hell but the ending is so goddamn stupid. The plot is bad the casting is bad

5. Batman Begins- this movie is so goddamn boring and if that’s not enough they whitewashed Ra’s. My memories of this come from watching it in a fugue state a year ago late at night and it didn’t make much of an impact on me.

4. Batman- it’s fine I guess. Michael Keaton is probably my favorite Batman ever and obviously the Joker is iconic but this movie had no impact on me. Points are added for the scene where Vicki and Bruce are eating at opposite ends of an absurdly large table that never fails to make me laugh.

3. Batman Forever- everyone in this movie besides Val Kilmer is giving their 120% and it’s glorious to see everyone trying to outcamp each other while the human embodiment of 😐is next to them its fascinating but I do forgive Kilmer for his crimes because he’s the only live action Bruce to look good in a turtle neck. Of course we have to pour one out for my horny queen Chase Meridian and the man who launched 1000 gay realizations Chris O'Donnell as Robin. A great movie but points off for not having Billy Dee Williams as Two Face

2. Batman Returns- I genuinely love this movie so much the soundtrack is killer and it fills me with emotions actually this entire movie fills me with emotions! I has the feel of a 5 issue arc from one of the 4 different Batman books in the 80s which I love and the casting is fantastic and it is just so good

1. Batman and Robin- Uma Thurman as Poison Ivy. The bat credit card. The gratuitous t and a shots of the titular Batman and Robin. When I was a child I was dog sitting for my neighbors and this movie was on their tv and I watched in all the way through and the fact that this memory sticks with me when I regularly forget my dads birthday means something

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