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#bc i thought this video was funny as shit
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one of my favorite things about zedaph is that on a server full of people that find strange and oft-overlooked minecraft mechanics or rare events and then see just how far they can push them in the name of spectacle or efficiency or world-breaking, zed is over here finding these mechanics in order to do the weirdest things he can think of in as entertaining a manner as possible
like i 100% have faith in zedaph's theoretical ability to be just as efficient or spectacular or world-breaking. if he wanted to do that stuff, i trust that he absolutely could. but thats so far from being his priority. instead, hes going to spend around a week of irl time focused entirely on eventually having the good luck to spawn in something insanely rare so that he can convert it into something even rarer, the result of which being something that 99% of the server reacts with complete and utter shock that it even exists in the first place, just because its zany and funny and he wanted to. and i love that
#zedaph#hermitcraft#genuinely i adore the clucky few project im not even done watching the episode and i had to pause and make this post#i saw impulses video first and went ''that HAS to be some sort of datapack or something-''#only to immediately go ''no. no it cant be. because this is zed#and its practically a trademark of his to push the limits of the game as far as possible in the direction least expected#not for the purpose of efficiency or spectacle or intimidation or whatever like some players who push limits#but purely for the purpose of making something so funny you cant help but laugh at whats going on#and maybe being a bit impressed that he ever thought of it in the first place''#at which point i went ''holy shit. since its zed doing this. somehow he ACTUALLY got a villager on a chicken. with no cheats. thats INSANE'#i was relieved when i checked my subscriptions to see what the next video i had to watch was and saw he would be next in line#bc if i had to sit through 19 other hermits videos before i could watch his and find out what the fuck he was doing i would have been so sa#sidenote but i feel like a zed video where he interacts with this many other people all in the same video is so rare#idk i didnt watch season 9 and i know he started collabing a lot more w/ other hermits then#so maybe its not nearly as rare these days#but like the last one that *i* saw where he interacted with this many people at once was towards the end of season 8#when all the people he experimented on earlier in the season came back to experiment on him#and like i would like zeds videos with or without the collabs. but its a lot of fun to see him interact with people#so its very cool to me when he does it with a lot of people all in the same video
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simikae · 2 years
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old sketch dump... woahhhh those files sure have somniums
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jamietwat · 6 months
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I feel like in some alternate universe where Jamie didn't come out at the press conference he just starts doing more and more signals that are less and less subtle to signal he's queer. Like he's wearing rainbow headbands. His nails are bi pride colors constantly. He exclusively uses a water bottle that says "IM GAY" during his morning sessions with Roy, hoping the paps will comment on it. Like he's out now but if ppl aren't gonna acknowledge it he's gonna be even more of a visual eyesore until they do.
Oh, for sure. Like he's already got his rainbow headband and bi colours headband and he's definitely still wearing them and he's still gonna be obvious about it on social media and in general so people can't ignore it
I can also 100% see him walking around in an "I put the bi in bitch" hat. I tried to put a picture but tumblr said fuck you and blocked the image for no reason so I guess no picture it is
He also makes a queer gc with Keeley and Colin and Trent just to send them those stupid intentionally cringy cursed meme pride shirts and try to talk them into getting the ones he sends for them because he thinks it's funny (and what he sends gets increasingly stupid and unlikely for them to actually wear the more they refuse). He expects Trent to be the first to refuse but instead Trent's the one that's just like sure to the first one and ends up getting it and wearing it one day to Jamie's great delight
(Roy is initially spared from this chaos when he's not out to the team yet so Jamie leaves him out of the gc even though everyone there has already figured him out but Jamie makes up for lost time being extra chaotic and annoying and intentionally pushing his luck once the team all knows)
Jamie's also gonna be an absolute menace about people claiming Keeley cheated on him and then even when they're both like we're literally both dating her shut the fuck up insisting they're just covering their asses or acting like poor them both getting roped along when they're both perfectly happy. Roy's gonna be involved in that though even though he's usually private about his personal shit but people are shitting on Keeley so theyr'e double power pulling receipts and making people look stupid, posting things with passive aggressive captions and things that are just flat out aggressive, and posting dumb jokes
Jamie's twitter and instagram are going to be primarily for fighting and passive aggressively establishing that theyr'e telling the truth while his tiktok has a video about that and then is just stupid jokes that also make their dynamic all that more obvious and publicly establishing that him and Roy are friends and don't hate each other (even as behind the scenes it becomes very different very soon after he starts this) and Roy gets dragged into this more willingly than Jamie's usual just making a tiktok around him and including him however he wants while Roy just glares at him
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so has anyone checked rusty quill's youtube lately
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astrxealis · 1 year
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arknights character design >>>
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omg i just noticed that. i have 21 hours in hollow knight. this is DEFINITELY exposing me at Bad At The Game Like Holy Shit I Am So Bad BUT. its ok. bc a lot of those 21 hours were spent being new to any sort of challenging game bc the hardest thing ive done is probably play minecraft like im Not A Gamer SO IM PROUD OF MY 21 HOURS. anyways i got my shade gonna go to peaks now ^-^
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starlightselfships · 1 year
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(warning for the video: kinda loud yelling, censored swear word)
Uh. Excuse you. @hoppinkiss and I are RIGHT here /j
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snekdood · 2 months
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i think some ppl dont understand the difference between being full on consciously bigoted + going out of your way to harass a minority and someone who heard phrases from their friends and family while not actually holding any ill will towards whichever minority
#i was both best friends with a black girl in middle school and also had my sister showing me racist videos and stereotypes#did it make me say things that i totally shouldnt have and didnt know i shouldnt say? for fucking sure- regardless i still never personally#saw her as bad or less than or anything at all. it probably helped that my childhood friend was filipino bc i was already exposed to#different people. its like the whole words vs actions thing. ppl would say words to me and i would parrot them thinking i was being#funny like my brother or sister but ultimately i never saw anyone as different than me and never really treated anyone differently either#i was a child who didnt understand the weight or meaning of things i parroted and trusted those around me to know better#since i was literally a fuckin' child. thats kinda what they do. and no one ever really countered me if i did something wrong?#there was one time in like 2nd grade where i had just come from a really christiany catholicy school to a different better cooler school#that was less oppressive and DIDNT require me to participate in church shit and wear a uniform-#and i was still not very exposed to black people at that time yet#so when i was in second grade there was a black kid (different person from my friend in middle school) and we were sitting at a table#and i was just kinda making an observation like 'you're black!' not a negative thing just like 'oh! i understand what this is! i know what#this is ive heard of ppl like this before and maybe met one or two black ppl previously!' lmao and then i followed it up with 'like martin#luther king!' bc he was probably one of the only black ppl i knew about and i literally learned about him when i visited the school for#the first time to try it out in first grade and then apparently everyone thought i was being super offensive??????????????????#??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????#i dont really remember the details and my gma remembers an entirely different thing so idek whats the truth but thats how i remember it#going down. i wasnt trying to be rude or offensive i was just like 'oh you're this! like this person ive heard of! neat :)!' and apparently#it got interpreted as a really bad thing that i said and idk. that was probably one of the weirder experiences i had growing up#like maybe its not always fun to be known for the minority you are bc of a famous person whos of the same minority...?? idk#i still to this day dont know what i said wrong really. i just wasnt exposed to very many black ppl#i knew of like one black girl once at a gymnastics thing i did sometimes and we were friends and i was a tiny tiny child all of this#happening way before 2nd grade and all i remember is her dad and my dad talking and me going to her fancy house to swim in her pool#once. and then i stopped doing gymnastics for whatever reason. so i wasnt exactly super exposed to black ppl frequently.#esp since the christianty-catholicy school was full of rich white kids. and so was my neighborhood at the time.#so i wasnt trying to be mean or offensive to this guy in 2nd grade but it got interpreted that way and then everyone treated me different#bc ig they thought i was a certain way bc the teachers were overreacting a bit. i have no idea. i really just think that one white#girl just liked to bully me and didnt actually have a good reason why and im tired of trying to humor ppl thinking its bc i was a bigot 😒#like i wouldnt be surprisedif nowadays that how she tries to justify it but NONE of what she ever did was calling me out or anything#it was ALLLLL treating me different for being 'weird' in her eyes. but i digress.
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People write some weird fucking shit
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querenciasturniolo · 8 months
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This is such a random concept but can you write something to do with the triplets finding out you’re a fan of there’s (which is shocking cuz you’re a well known singer) and you guys finally meet up for a car video and Chris, who’s usually really talkative, gets really quiet and nervous and Matt and Nick catch on to why and they end up teasing him…
favorite ⮕ c.s.
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word count: 2.7k
warnings: swearing, teasing, she/her pronouns
summary: the triplets invite you to to do a video with them after a viral video at your last concert on tour, and teasing ensues when chris is awfully quiet for once
a/n: this one is a little longer, but only because i am awful at transitions and find way too much detail important. this was SO fun to write, i hope i did it justice 💓
{i am NOT calling fangirls losers, at all. i am a fangirl and a loser, but that doesn’t mean everyone is. i wrote y/n saying she was a loser bc i thought it was funny, carry on}
everything written is completely fictional. the people i write for are written with characteristics and mannerisms that i made for them, this is in no way depicting what would actually happen in real life.
part one || part two
“You have stated multiple times before that you’re a fan of many people, whether they’re artists or creators of some sort. Any you’d like to mention?”
“The Sturniolo triplets, easy. They’re content creators; they make these car videos and they’re absolutely hilarious. I found them on Tiktok about a year ago, and I’ve been watching them ever since.”
A single answer to a question had your fans going absolutely ballistic.
It was your fault, of course, but you didn’t think they would act like this. In every one of your posts, more comments than not were about the triplets. You found it more funny than anything, knowing that your fans were just excited that you enjoyed the same things they did.
At the closing show of your tour, you had just finished your last song, and you looked out at the crowd one last time to realize that this wasn’t going to go away. A single sign in the crowd had you laughing and shaking your head.
DO A VIDEO WITH THE TRIPLETS
You pointed at the sign as you walked back to leave the stage. “The ball is in their court, now.” You said, the crowd going ballistic as you finally stepped off of the stage.
After that, it seemed radio silent for a while, but you had no idea what was going on behind the scenes. It had been only a few weeks since that show, and you were just hanging out at your apartment, one of your best friends sitting across from you on the couch.
“Y/n, have you seen this?”
You looked up from your phone and glanced at her screen, a video of your last concert playing. The sign was shown before it was turned around and the camera was on you. You saw you grin and laugh at the sign and point, saying what you said before. The moment you finished, you heard the fan scream and other screams around her completely fucking with the speaker.
“I mean, I remember that happening, but I haven’t seen the video, why?” You asked, handing her phone back to her. She raised her eyebrows and kept her phone screen facing you.
“It’s viral.”
Your eyes immediately went to the likes, and you were shocked to see there were over four million. “Holy shit.” You mumbled, your phone vibrating in your hand. You looked down, your jaw dropping when you saw the DM before you. “Holy shit!”
nicolassturniolo: hey! would you want to be in a car video??
You stared at the screen, completely speechless as you looked between the DM and your friend. “What the fuck do I say?” You asked, finally opening the message. She laughed from across from you and you couldn’t help but stare at her, completely bewildered.
“Say yes? It’s a pretty simple answer.” She said. You nodded your head and answered Nick quickly, asking him when they wanted to meet up. “How are you fangirling right now?”
You looked up again and frowned. “Because I’m a loser, obviously.” You said, your friend laughing and shaking her head as she dropped back down on her side of the couch.
You and Nick messaged back and forth, you finding out the details of the video and where they wanted to meet up. You decided tonight would be best for both of your schedules, and you were chomping at the bit to get ready and get there. You’d never done anything casual like this, only professional interviews and somewhat press-related conversations. You had no idea what was going to happen in this video, except for the general idea of it being a Q&A between the four of you.
Driving to the meetup spot had your entire body on high alert, excited to meet the triplets, but also terrified to do so. You were a fangirl at heart, but you refused to show it. You pulled into the parking lot, looking around for the van.
The moment you saw it, you took a deep breath and pulled up next to it, frowning and looking around at the desolate parking lot. Before you could even fully get out of the car, Nick was opening the back door of the van and waving at you. You grinned and shut your door, locking your car out of habit and heading towards the van.
“Hey, it’s so nice to finally meet you!” Nick said, stepping out of the van and giving you a hug.
You chuckled and pulled away, shrugging your shoulders. “You too! I’m not gonna lie, I was nervous as hell on the drive over.” You said, following Nick’s lead and climbing into the van after him, awkwardly climbing over him. You looked at Matt and Chris, your smile wide as you nodded in acknowledgement. “Hey.”
“Why were you nervous?” Matt asked, your cheeks heating up as you shrugged your shoulders.
“I’m a big fan, and extremely awkward, if you couldn’t tell.” You said, the three of them laughing and adjusting themselves to face you.
“It’s totally fine, you should have seen Nick before you pulled up.” Chris said, Nick’s jaw dropping to the floor as you looked over at him with a similar expression. The conversation mellowed out shortly after that, your nerves dissipating as you got more comfortable.
“Okay, so here’s our idea.” Nick started, your eyes meeting his immediately. “You hide behind Chris’ seat while we introduce the video, and when we say we have a special guest, you pop up and introduce yourself.” He finished. You nodded your head, fighting your smile as you wedged yourself between Chris’ seat and the seat you were sitting in on the floor.
“Matt, go check the camera.” Nick said. You covered your mouth to avoid laughing at the ensuing argument.
“Nick, why do you never check the fucking camera, this is ridiculous.” Matt grumbled, climbing out of the car to check it. Nick looked down at you, raising his eyebrows and shaking his head. You snorted, and waited patiently for Matt to get back into the car.
“Alright. Today, we’re doing a Q&A, but we have a little surprise for everyone.” Chris said. He adjusted in his seat, you only knowing this because the movement pushed you into the other seat harshly. You couldn’t help but groan at the pressure of the seat against your side, smacking your hand over your mouth as Nick threw his head back and laughed.
“We have a special guest, if you couldn’t tell by Chris breaking her ribs. Come on out, reveal yourself.” Nick said. You shoved yourself out from behind the seat, your hand pressed against your side as the four of you laughed. “So, a video went viral of Y/n at one of her concerts challenging us to get her in a video.”
You scoffed and looked at Nick. “It wasn’t a challenge at all. Someone in the crowd had a sign that said I needed to be in a car video, and all I said was that the ball was in your court.” You defended playfully, Nick holding his hands up in mock defense. “I didn’t realize how insane that interview would go. I said I was a fan, and all of a sudden everyone was tagging me in your posts and telling me I needed to be in a video.” You said, shrugging your shoulders.
“Alright, introduce yourself to the video, and tell them if you have anything coming up, if you want.” You looked at Matt after he spoke, realization dawning on you as you nodded and finally looked at the camera.
“Oh, right. I’m Y/n. I just announced my new single Changes that comes out in a few days, go listen if you want.” You said, looking between the three of them to make sure that was alright. Chris chuckled and nodded, facing the camera and pulling his phone from his pocket.
“So, this Q&A is different for a few reasons. One; we have a special guest, which you already know. And two; we decided to ask her some questions, and she’s going to ask some questions that she has for us. We will be answering some fan questions as well, since we only came up with a handful of questions.” Chris said, Nick gesturing for him to speed up.
The video progressed with the four of you rapid fire asking questions about your careers and other random things, occasionally debating when someone said something the others thought was outrageous.
“How long have you been a fan of ours?” Chris asked. You met his eyes and felt your face heat up before you looked away quickly and shrugged.
“I saw a clip of one of your videos on Tiktok about a year ago, and looked that specific video up. It was the one where Nick’s yelling about a staff, I believe.” You said, Nick sighing and shaking his head.
Chris chuckled and nodded his head. “Nick yelling seems to be a common theme in people looking us up, so that makes sense.”
“When did you become a fan of mine?” You asked, Nick nearly dropping his drink as he put it into the cupholder. You laughed and braced yourself as Nick held up his hands.
“I found your first album by accident a few months after it came out, and I blasted it on repeat for weeks after that. I may have forced Matt and Chris to listen to it, but they fucked with it heavy, no matter what they say.” Matt rolled his eyes with a smile and grabbed his phone, scrolling through the questions.
“It’s not my type of music, but it definitely isn’t bad. The lyrics were definitely my favorite part, you’ve got a way with words.” Chris said, Matt nodding and meeting your eyes as well.
You blushed and smiled awkwardly. “Thank you, that means a lot. I always try to tell a story with my songs, so I’m glad that my lyrics show that.” Jesus, you couldn’t take a compliment to save your life.
A few more questions were asked and answered before Matt spoke up.
“This is a fan question; who’s your celebrity crush?” Matt read, dropping his phone into his lap and looking back at you. You looked up and thought for a moment before shrugging.
“I guess the easy answer is Ryan Gosling, or something, but I’m not exactly sure—oh! I take that back, Harry Styles for sure. I’d love to do a song with him, it’s been one of my dreams since I started making music.” You rambled, the three of them humming and nodding their heads. “What about you guys?”
Matt spoke first, his answer completely outrageous and out there. Nick refused to answer, and that’s when all three of you realized that Chris was silent. You looked at him, his eyes focused on the center console.
“Chris?” You asked. He looked up then, which is when you noticed his pink cheeks.
He shook his head. “I don’t want to answer this question, let's move on.” He said, turning to face forward again. You frowned and looked between Matt and Nick, who were staring at Chris confused.
“Why are you acting so weird—oh.” Nick said, the confusion on his face morphing into a sly smirk. “I see.” He said, looking at Matt. It took Matt a little longer to get there, but soon he was grinning and shoving Chris’ arm.
“Come on, Chris. Just say it.” He teased, your eyebrows furrowed as you looked between all of them.
“I have no idea what the fuck is happening, but alright.” You said, turning your attention to Chris. He shook his head and looked over at Matt.
“I’m not saying it, just move on.” He said, an amused smile on his lips.
“Why? Is it because she’s in the car?” Nick asked. Your face heated up immediately, your eyes meeting Chris’ shocked gaze. Matt smacked his hand over his mouth to cover up the laugh that nearly knocked him forward.
“Nick, cut that out.”
Nick’s laughter rang through the van as he fell backwards in his seat and shook his head, Chris’ embarrassed chuckle pushing past his lips as he looked at you one more time.
“You could have denied it!” Matt finally said, all four of you completely losing it and doubling over. You’d never laughed so hard in your life, and you were glad you agreed to do this.
Chris sat up and wiped at his eyes, the remnants of his laughter still showing on his face as he shook his head. “I could have denied it, but I’m not a liar.” He said, avoiding your eyes completely as he took a sip of his Pepsi. “So yeah, my celebrity crush is Y/n, sue me.”
Your mouth went dry, not expecting him to say it out loud so bluntly.
“Okay! Next question!” Nick said, pulling his phone out of his pocket. You shook your head and smiled as you waited for his question. He dropped his phone in his lap, a mischievous smile on his face as he gestured to you. “Who’s your favorite triplet?”
You groaned and threw your head back, looking forward again to see all three pairs of eyes glued to you intently. You blinked and looked between them, shaking your head when seeing their goofy smiles.
“I plead the fifth, absolutely not.” You said, all of them laughing and shaking their heads.
“Oh, come on! Just say it!” Matt said, resting his head on his hand and widening his eyes at you.
“No feelings will be hurt, just tell us.” Nick said, your eyes meeting his as you shook your head.
“It’s me, guys. It’s official.” Chris said, your head whipping in his direction. Your face felt like it was on fire as the silence continued and he held your gaze. Nick was the first to lose it, grabbing your arm as he dropped forward and laughed uncontrollably.
“What is with you two?! Just deny it or something!” He said, Matt and Chris joining in and covering their faces with their hands. You sighed and shook your head.
“I’m not a liar, either. Let’s move on.” You said, picking up your phone and going through your notes app.
“Favorite song, not just by me, any song in general.” You said, the conversation changing immediately. When everyone was done filming, you said your goodbyes and stepped out of the car. You weren’t expecting them all to jump out of the car as well.
“Do you mind taking a picture with us for our photo dump? It’s totally cool if not.” Nick asked.
“Oh! For sure, could I get a picture for my Instagram too?” They nodded, and you took a few pictures, some were serious and others were ridiculous. You each exchanged numbers, sending over the pictures that were taken on each of your phones. When the pictures were done and the four of you were just laughing at all of the photos, you looked at each of them. “I had a lot of fun! Thank you for having me.” You said, pulling Nick into a hug.
“Oh, of course! You should come hang out with us sometime, whenever you’re free.” He said as he pulled away. You nodded and accepted the hug from Matt, biting the inside of your cheek as your eyes met Chris’ after you pulled away.
He hesitated but shrugged his shoulders and held out his arms. You chuckled and walked towards him, wrapping your arms around him in a tight hug. Your heart was racing as you pulled away and smiled at him, hoping he didn’t notice the burning in your cheeks.
“Again, it was so nice to meet you. Text me if you ever want to make plans, okay?” You said, the three of them nodding and waving as you got into your car.
The drive back to your apartment was long, your exhaustion finally hitting you as you checked the dash and saw it was three in the morning. God, you were going to be exhausted at your meetings tomorrow. You finally pulled into the parking garage and got out of your car, locking the door as your phone vibrated in your pocket. It wasn’t until you laid in your bed and plugged in your phone that you checked the notification, your heart pounding as you read the text, a shocked laugh leaving your lips.
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kunikuma · 1 year
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babe, im toxic during comp games to everyone except  ✧you✧
relationship: gamer!kuni x gn!reader
synopsis: kuni’s just a little mad because childe sucks at competitive video games and he just needs a quick breather ♡ warnings: swearing, but it’s only in the beginning bc kuni is tilted af lmao, childe’s name name a/n: god i love gamer kuni. he’s just an all round lil shit, but is just a big softie for his special person. streamer kuni next? this could have been smut so fast omfg ///
update: i tried writing smut for streamer!kuni -> personal cheerleader
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“How are you this fucking bad?”
“Holy fuck, he was STANDING RIGHT THERE-”
“Ajax, I mean this with every inch, ounce, and molecule in my body. You are god awful-”
Your boyfriend’s rage broke the silence in your shared apartment. Moments like these are frequent; when you were busy scrolling on your phone and snuggling on his cat themed bean bag near him and his PC, Kunikuzushi was frequently slamming his hand on the table and mashing his keyboard because Ajax died again-
“-actually good at this game. Unlike you, I don’t play characters in competitive I know I’m shit at-”
In the corner of your eye, you notice his hand slip from the table, fumbling in the air as if he was looking for something. His hand clumsily lands on your head and you blinked, tilting your head at him, wordlessly asking, ‘do you need something?’. Kunikuzushi doesn’t pay you mind, just ruffling your hair little too roughly for your liking.
You grumbled at the fact he was messing up your hair, but you continued to scroll anyways. He notes your sound of displeasure and lifts his hand off your head, but his hand continues to hover. The gremlin next to you in his chair with his cat ears headset finally turns his head to face you. He rests his chin on his palm as he gives a loud, exhale. He squints as he gives you a pointed look. His other hand travels to his head, running his hand through his bangs, ruffling up his own hair. Your boyfriend looks disheveled and a little pissed, but boy, he always looked cute. Especially when the cat ears are lit up blue-
“I thought you said Ajax was good at this game.” Kunikuzushi says plainly, his right brow quirked up. “I’m pretty sure my mom is better at this game...”
“Well, he looked like he was pulling his weight when he was showing off to me the other day.” You mutter, sitting up in the bean bag. The faux leather fabric makes the iconic fart-like noise and your boyfriend grimaces when everyone in his call starts howling, “yo, did Scara just rip hella ass-”. He quickly slams his finger on the ‘mute’ and ‘deafen’ keys.
He purses his lips and gives a small sigh, but his eyes soften at you. His hand mindlessly wanders back onto the top of your head. His shoulders slacken as the seconds pass, tension evaporating the longer his fingers dance and fiddle with your hair.
“Don’t you want to play?” You ask softly, your eyes drifting to the profile pictures of his friends sitting in the game’s lobby. You lean into his touch a little more. Normally, you’re also seated a few feet away from Kunikuzushi, playing whatever game had your attention for the night. But tonight, you felt like just chilling by his side. “…or are you getting too tilted for tonight?” You ask with a small grin.
He hums, pushing a strand of hair behind your ear. “Oh, I’m absolutely seething right now. I just need a breather, so let me have my moment with you.” He pauses and gives you a haughty look. “So, oblige me.”
You crinkle your nose. Some hair fell on your face from his stress relieving tousling, but he quickly moves it away from your face. “Honestly, Kuni? You’re so toxic while you play.” You laugh and gaze at him. “I’ve honestly never seen you like that. It’s kinda funny, but I’m glad you don’t talk to me like that when we play together.”
He smirks a little and presses back into his seat, clasping his hands together, finally ending his head scratches and petting. “Well, I’m definitely not the nicest person, but I don’t want to rude to you. You’re special.” Before you could awe at his cute words, he immediately ruins the moment. “You’re not as good as me, but you’re miles better than Ajax,” he explains as a mischievous glint sparkles in his eye, “…so, I hide my toxicity from you and let it out on him.”
You roll yours eyes and sink back into the bean bag, but the corners of your mouth curl up anyways. ‘Little shit’, you thought to yourself.
He pouts a little when he notices you’re out of reach, but he takes that as a sign to end his break. Kuni straightens up in his seat and lets out a quiet huff, unmuting and undeafening his audio. Immediately, the muffled sounds of all of your mutual friends echo through his headset and Kuni audibly groans and tells everyone to shut up and start the queue. The light atmosphere the two of you built instantly dissipated, but that had little affect on the small smile on your face and Kuni’s temporarily relaxed posture.
Kuni tilts his head down at you once last time as the loading screen popped up. Once your eyes meet, he quickly waves “hi” and mouths an “I love you” .
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i know for sure kuni has been chat banned in like all games... my lil terms of service disobeyer uwu. i wrote this after getting tilted. god i couldve written smut. smut done ope ©kunikuma
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favcharacterpoll · 6 months
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ROUND 6 MATCH 3: CECIL VS. C!WILBUR
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Cecil Palmer from Welcome to Night Vale faces c!Wilbur from the dsmp. @10piecechickenmcnugget get over here sage
Cecil Propaganda:
"Cecil is not only the Tumblr sexyman, he is the first gay protagonist of a podcast that most of us have ever heard. From the very first episode he was unashamedly queer and no one has ever called him out or given him shit for being gay. He is a gay Jewish fashion disaster who is the mouthpiece for an incredibly bizarre town and plays the whole “this horrifying thing is completely normal”thing so well. If Cecil wasn’t there, I think a lot of people wouldn’t have felt so accepted for just being who they were. Cecil is an inspiration and the queer podcast rep we all deserved as we were growing."
"he’s gay. he’s a dilf. he’s ageless. he has been since there’s was nothing and he’s still here after the world ended. he can summon music. his mother is a oracle his father is a tree. his cat is a man who got cursed and also has wings a stinger and poison??? he thinks a tutu and crocs is formal wear and has talked to god and she said ‘I love you. I’m sorry’. he’s definitely guilty of manslaughter from negligence"
"this is the website Night Vale built!"
c!Wilbur Propaganda:
"Accurate depiction of mental health and spiral, handled delicately and deliberately, every piece of his story was thought and planned and in the end he went home to Utah. Thank you lord."
"Please don’t let the name dream smp effect how you feel about this submission, this character is completely unrelated to dream and I’m pretty sure the person who played him has nothing to do with dream anymore. This man single handedly got me through a horrible patch filled with extreme paranoia by also being extremely paranoid. Genuinely really helped me feel seen and I coped a lot by getting invested in this character. I almost cried when he died :("
"He’s so fucking stupid. I could infodump for hours this man transed my gender. Everything has gone wrong in his life. He’s the definition of a bisexual disaster."
"I didn’t fail 10th grade math bc I was thinking about c!wilbur for him to lose round one"
"I mean look at him!! his Minecraft skin is adorable!!!"
"if you people vote for cwilbur i'll draw him in a bikini."
"A VOTE FOR C!WILBUR IS A VOTE FOR GIRLBOYS EVERYWHERE"
"i should not have underestimated minecraft fans they came together"
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"Season 1 changed me. I didn’t know minecraft videos could have good acting, dramatic plots, etc. Wilbur was one of the best there. His plot was so interesting with the L’Manburg and the unfinished symphony arcs. He was funny, dramatic, sad… I fondly remember my dsmp days (though I only saw up to like part of Tommy’s exile)"
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astrxealis · 1 year
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man i’m kinda exhausted tbh. maybe. maybe. i sleep
also fun fact i think it is hilarious that. w/o context. i will say i screamed this birthday more than any other bday b4
#⋯ ꒰ა starry thoughts ໒꒱ *·˚#haha. hahaha. No#anyways more rambles bcs i just REMEMBERED. holy shit#okay i will explain in tags now. the context#I WATCHED TRAIN TO BUSAN FOR THE FIRST TIME!!! watching scary movie on bday yeah haha#it is funny that the lil girl has a bday in the movie... and it was my bday when we were watching... LMFAO#speaking of which bayo3 and arknights anime and the new gbf event w kou uncap is here now. i will do that asap#i've barely checked any bday greetings from games save for a bit from lyria so far and those from marius ... >___<#anyways yeah i watched scary movie w friends this night. hilarious. i even teared up. and got so angry at those guys. they deserved that#<33 ^^ BUT YEAH this is the bday i've screamed the most. my throat hurts tbh. also the cake earlier was pretty sweet#but uh fun to play around w. yeah. yeah. GJHSDBJHG YEAH i kinda play w my food <//3 it is fun okay. also it's not too messy#just lil weird designs and uhh stuff. like splitting the cake layers and lune adding uhh the cake onto the icing of the cake (??) yeah??#yeah tho WHEEEEE !!! o man right... i was surprised to see who first greeted me hbd tbh. from my class#vv nice of them tho gdsbgjhsbd i wasn't expecting it from her tho. ALSO HOLY SHIT I NEED TO WATCH THE TXT VIDEOS#they preformed here in the ph on my bday and they are my favs. i love them#also i shld check out my favs like social media accts from games and kpop and see what are posts on my bday LMFAO#THE LIGHTS FUCKING WENT OFF WE HAD A VERY QUICK BROWNOUT HOOOOOLY SHIT#o man i was kinda scared to check some of my other discord servers bcs i forget them bcs i have. a lot of stuff and all#so only really focus on the ones i have energy for but I DIDNT HAVE TO WORRY MUCH ... SOBS ......... i am happy#I FORGOT THIS WAS HERE. oh my god#i stop ramlbing and now talk irl
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More creepypasta headcannons!
+the women this time! Also these aren’t sexual, but there will be references to drinking, drugs and sex
And in most of these I am ignoring what is actually cannon so I’m sorry, I just like thinking more on the wholesome side of this fandom.
Also, I understand that Sally is like not at all like her OG story, but this is how I like to interpret her so please don’t hate!
Jeff the killer
Age: 22
Wine Problems: got citric acid rubbed into his healing mouth scar by EJ and Ben. (He splattered paint all over Ben’s gaming system Bc he wouldn’t give him free weed. EJ joined because of the “Tear-alliance”)
Head-cannons
“erm actually ☝🏻”
-He buys a lot of flip phones to prank the pastas. Specifically Ben, Jane and Hoodie. Tbh kind of a big bully. Also definitely steals slenders money.
-Lactose intolerant
-eats hot Cheetos like an mf
-he’s oddly spiritual??? But in a scared way, he thinks the gods are coming for him just cause 🤷🏻‍♂️
-he thinks he’s slick whenever he steals Slenders money, but slender knows.
-one time for a TikTok, he tried getting one of the pastas to do the candy man dance with him but no one wanted to join him except for Hoodie Bc he felt bad 😭
-every normal person thinks his TikTok is a devoted cosplayer, but he’s not.
-he’s actually really depressed about Liu, but he never rlly addressed it with himself. He just ignores it and him Bc he doesn’t know how to react.
Jane the Killer
Age: 23
Wine Problems: Sally accidentally got shoved by Jeff during a quarrel and now she has to get Sally to stop crying before Slender comes back from meeting his brothers.
Head-cannons
-makes so many funny faces to herself and actively talks to herself in front of people (and mid convo too)
-you will catch her pacing down the main hallway with headphones in when she’s angry.
-AWFUL BAKER idk HOW she just can’t bake. It always burns.
-her natural hair is shoulder length, black and curly.
-Her wife is a normal person (granted immunity from slender), her name is Lillian.
-Toby was the ring bearer for the wedding, Sally and Lazari (when she was young) were the flower girls. Lillian’s brother walked her down the isle, Toby walked Jane down the isle afterwards. Jeff at the reception gave a surprisingly good speech about Jane and their marriage… but then he got destructive drunk and had to be carried out Frank Gallagher style.
-she has a separate house and identity that she uses away from the mansion to be normal with her life and be the adult she couldn’t be.
-she’s never rlly at her other house tho.
-she loves having deep scientific talks with people to see their ideas and to read them better.
-she’s a really good person to talk to about passion projects Bc she’ll engage in your thoughts and use her knowledge to help you with whatever your stuck on or thinking of. She also hypes too.
-her and Kate are like the main watchers/caretakers of new pastas to make them feel comfortable.
-she is actively the only pasta who has seen Slenders human form.
Ben drowned
Age: 19
Wine Problems: Jeff and sally creating a doll out of Ben’s hair. The hair from his shower drain. Then them harassing him with it, trapping him in the livingroom TV.
Head-cannons
-The house dealer
-Everyone is trying to get all up in his business
-it takes him 20 minutes every morning doing his hair and skin routine.
-his favorite video game is RDR2
-chronic Jacksepticeye fanboy. Has attempted to see him on tour awhile back ago.
-his room is clean, but so weird. Like he has Minecraft posters and odd shit like that. He also has those LED lights on his walls and a really fucking expensive gaming setup.
-does not punch his walls.
-he has a pet tarantula named Bea.
-he chronically enjoys Pepsi. It’s kind of gross. Also he is HUGE on snacks, like he has a mini fridge.
-also to be allowed in his room you have to cashapp him 5$ if you’re in their for longer than 15 minutes for “wasting his time”
-he listens to a lot of French music and video game soundtrack to fall asleep.
-he LOVES Skyrim.
-he knows a lot abt tech since he’s a video game ghost/glitch, but it’s not his only personality.
Clockwork
Age: 20
Wine problems: recently started hearing voices after accidentally eating one of the special brownies in the kitchen. She’s in the corner in the living room having a bad trip. Lazari is behind her comforting her. (Clockwork currently doesn’t think she’s real)
Head-cannons
-asexual and aerosexual. They just are rarely attracted to people.
-LOVES low-rise jeans
-she’s like hella sarcastic and definitely has disorders (undiagnosed)
-for the most part she’s pretty quiet, speaks more with her hands than her mouth.
-tall af, like 5’11.
-whenever she gets a migraine you might as well shoot her since she has the clock in her eye 😭
-her favorite movie series is SAW. She has actively built some of the prototypes like the reverse bear trap.
-she collects animal teeth and bones.
-her room gives very much teenage dirtbag.
-after awhile she starts hating people she hangs around Bc she’s bad at setting boundaries. That’s one of the reasons she broke up with Toby.
-very passionate about politics and her assignments.
-she has a cat named Bubble, she’s a Siamese cat and she surprisingly cuddly. Bubble hates everyone but clockwork and sometimes she sits on Clockworks shoulder.
Ticci Toby
Age: 22
Wine problems: he was out getting groceries for the pastas and then a group of 13 yr olds started harassing him (he bought one of those lobsters in the water) until he went to his car.
Head-cannons
-buys the house groceries once a week.
-genuinely careless. Like he is so straight faced tbh. Unless you’re really funny and he’s seriously caught of guard.
-eats so much chocolate it’s insane. LOVES hot chocolate.
-his stutter does get better, but it’s still pretty present.
-he does not like Jeff. At all.
-sometimes he can be such an accidental dickhead. He does not know timing like at all.
-you will see him awake at 5AM eating salad.
-he love’s Hollywood undead almost an unreasonable amount. Borderline stalkery.
-excellent organizer and party planner, typically helps Kate with designing shit.
-he doesn’t really know how to feel about the pastas, he just rlly like Jane though. She reminds him of everything he’s lost.
-he loves to draw birds and birdwatching.
-he only kills his assignments.
Judge Angels
Age: 25
Wine problems: she spilled a glass of milk on smile dog and is currently hiding in her room until he goes away. Also got caught gatekeeping by Lazari.
Head-cannons
-can’t handle certain writing styles. Like she hates commas and all capitalized letters. They just grind her gears.
-her favorite food is mangos.
-tbh shopping addict. She’s always buying small trinkets and organizing boxes. On her way to becoming a horder. (Not really but kinda)
-probably one of the funniest pastas (if you unlock her first)
-sometimes she’ll randomly turn to a southern accent but she doesn’t realize it.
-easily cringable. She’s either giggling, lost or just staring. It’s kind of funny tho.
-She’s so bad at scheduling. She makes plans on plans and forgets other plans and it’s highly irritating. Almost every pasta gets annoyed at her for this.
-she makes a mean French toast.
-her closet consists of the same outfits repeated and she lacks confidence. She doesn’t gain much until she became friends with the girls of the mansion and they started introducing her to different feminine/masculine styles. She now comfortably represents androgynously.
-she has dimple piercings.
Puppeteer
Age: unknown
Wine Problems: the clown-posse (LJ, Jason and Candypop) are all on his ass because the past week all of them have seen him steal something of theirs at least once. LJ lost 5 items, Jason lost 2 and Candypop lost 3.
Head-cannons
-mischievous fucker.
- ‘swiper no swiping’ my ass.
-he’s seen the entirety of paw patrol and kind of loves the show?? It’s just so stupid, he loves making fun of it.
-has literally 0 sympathy and will laugh at your misfortune to your face.
-he can eat anything spicy without feeling it. Sour candy tho? You might as well shoot him.
-can’t handle his alcohol.
-calls the mansion his trap house.
-has a bit where he calls the pastas his whores since him and slender have similar powers.
-He’s not that much of a dick though, he won’t attempt to control someone unless they sign a contract.
-hates looking into mirrors, they make him depressed.
-has phases of sleeping 24/7 and staying up for days on end.
-don’t bother him when he’s snug as a bug in a rug, he will kill you if you interrupt him.
-he LOVES a good soft blanket. No matter where you will catch him with a cute blankie, as long as it’s soft. His favorite blanket is from Liu during their secret Santa Christmas celebration. It’s a navy blue blanket with white tiny flecks representing stars.
-sometimes he thinks really deep and looks at the sky at night, but he doesn’t understand much since he’s the personification of self-deletion. He has trouble understanding emotion and how he feels sometimes so he lashes out.
-sometimes he takes it bad when he thinks about how the pastas think he’s an asshole bc he wants to be seen as more than that but he never really shows that.
-British 😏
Nurse Ann
Age: 25
Wine problems: she woke up with both of her legs missing, someone (she doesn’t know who), stole her needle and thread. She can’t attach her legs until then, so far she’s been in her wheelchair. No luck.
Head-cannons
-her eyes are completely black.
-her favorite hobby is cleaning and sewing. Both of them just calm her down whenever she’s feeling jittery or anxious. For Christmas she sees a bunch of sweaters for the pastas.
-when she was 13 she worked at a local restaurant as a waitress.
-her legs come off if her stitches come undone. Sometimes the Pastas will purposely cut the thread as a joke. (It’s all in good fun tho, shes okay with it).
-plus sized
-can speak Spanish and French! She was one of those hella smart girls in class.
-she plays a lot of LoveNikki.
-she was a theater kid in highschool. Her school did sweeny Todd and she played Mrs Lovett.
-her and eyeless Jack are geniuses of the mansion. Ppl tried setting them up, but neither of them felt the vibe. They’re good acquaintances tho.
-Slender doesn’t send her out on much assignments since she’s normally so busy with the pastas injuries. The only reason why EJ goes out as much as he does is to get food— that he insists he can do by himself.
Bloody Painter
Age: 24
Wine problems: fell asleep while painting. His clothes is ruined and so is his painting. In his hella sassy feels rn. Totally sulking. Abt to drown himself in the shower.
Head-cannons
-snarky bitch.
-he LOVES white chocolate macadamia cookies.
-“wtf”
-he can’t HANDLE it whenever someone is watching what he’s doing or questioning his method of doing things. It makes a certain spring in his head snap.
-I’m ngl I think he’s always super tired. Probably cause he’s besties with puppeteer. Like this man is eepy, he’s a cute sleeper tho.
-he’s silent but scary. You will NEVER hear him coming. He could be behind you waiting and you genuinely would not notice until you’re dead.
-I feel like he spends a lot of time in his room painting, but whenever he gets an art block he might as well cry. He genuinely doesn’t know what to do when he can’t paint. His three options are; crying, reading or eating.
-Jeff is always joking around with him, but he doesn’t really play along with it… even tho he tries to get closer to a lot of the pastas. Jeff just isn’t one he’s interested being nice too.
-he watched miraculous ladybug once and almost cried.
Rouge
Age: 25
Wine problems: she accidentally ripped her pants and not in the cute way. Also her worn down converse she’s had since she was 15 finally wore out and broke down.
Head-cannons
-she’s not that messy, but for the aesthetic she can be. She’s not afraid of getting dirty.
-she has a dream journal that she writes in every morning Bc it helps her lucid dream. She only likes lucid dreaming Bc she feels in control, though this has accidentally lead to sleep paralysis.
-she’s super sensitive to the cold.
-she’s really good friends with clockwork.
-she’s honestly a creative genius. She loves literature and art and performance. Though sometimes she gets completely lost in her work.
-constantly in a state of escapism.
-she kind of reminds me of Charlie from Perks of Being a Wallflower. That’s probably her favorite movie too.
-she loves hanging around the girls of the mansion, they make her feel at home. Like she’s sm more comfortable around them than others. Sometimes when a new pasta arrives and they throw an honoring ceremony, the girl pastas will all get ready together in Slenders room! (His room is the biggest and he’s cooking all the food with the boys)
Masky
Age: 25
Wine problems: ran out of storage on his phone, now he has to delete the many photos and videos of him pranking Toby in his sleep.
Head-cannons
-he’s not as much as a dickhead as he seems, like he’s actually pretty chill and he has simple boundaries.
-he’s more of a loner if anything, the one person he like actually talks to tho is Toby and hoodie. Hoodie as an acquaintance and Toby as a little brother.
-sometimes he can get a little crazy, but that’s expected.
-he’s the easiest pasta to scare, this mf is JUMPY.
-he is a chronic shitposter.
-he loves self care tho. Like he’s always showering or getting shower stuff. He has like a collection of shower stuff.
-he used to have his ears pierced as a rebellion against his parents as a teen, but they closed. Sometimes he wishes he could get them repeirced.
-he’s like the type of guy who takes bubble baths a lot Bc he’s stressed all the time. Like he’s ALWAYS irritated abt something.
-you know he’d run a Walmart deli like his bitch.
-regardless, he takes his job too seriously and sometimes slender gets a lil concerned abt him Bc he literally gets crazy sometimes.
-rated T for ‘Too hard to work with’
Laughing Jill
Age: unknown
Wine problems: choked on a piece of hair and the next person that talks to her is getting the belt. Also couldn’t answer a simple math equation in a debate with hoodie so now everyone is calling her a bimbo.
Head-cannons
-she makes SO MANY TIKTOK VIDEOS, almost TikTok famous (she doesn’t show her or anyone’s face on cam)
-almost started a mukbang account.
-her and Jack came from the same Angel hence their name and design.
-she cried when watching the fnaf movie.
-she wears some odd earrings and she actually adds some color in her wardrobe too, unlike Jack.
-she is really into evanescence.
-has an aggressive southern accent (like Millie from Helluva Boss)
-southern lass girlboss sass idk
-she absolutely HATES water, like swimming is her biggest nightmare. She hates the ocean and ocean animals. They just creep her out.
-she’s not really close with anyone but she yaps sm. The one who tolerate it the most is probably Kate, Ben and Bloody painter.
-she’s been in a mosh pit a couple times and the first time someone threw a PB&J sandwich on her. She almost cried.
Hoodie
Age: 26
Wine problems: trying to keep control of the house. Put away the brownies, constantly cleaning. Is forced to give up once Jeff throws ice cream at the ceiling.
Head-cannons
-no matter where, he only wears converse.
-tbh think he watches some anime.
-I feel like if he ever was rapping he’d be really good at it.
-with assignments he’s one of the most efficient out of the mansion, some people don’t like him cause of it.
-he stays out of most peoples way, sometimes he’ll help Nurse Ann clean tho. He probably reads often with Sally too.
-he’s a loyal confidant to all no matter what and he’s relatively judgment free.
-he has an aggressive model walk, might as well call him Adriana Lima.
-him and Toby are like the only pastas with bad facial hair and sometimes in the morning they shave together 😭
-he cringes so hard knowing that there’s a whole fandom that he’s one of the stars in, like he thinks it’s a bit odd.
-ever since toby got high and went anonymous online, creating a fandom revolving around their house and friends. Things have been a bit wary between the two.
Sally
Age: physically 8, mentally 215
Wine problems: got accidentally shoved by Jeff (sobbing). Missing slender, also is tired of the bull going on in the house. Mf is abt to yell.
Head-cannons
-she totally gets annoyed at the pastas Bc they all treat her like she’s her physical age. Like I feel like this is something that genuinely pisses her off.
-even tho she is 215, she’s very childish, like she loves Disney and animated movies.
-She doesn’t really play with dolls but she has a collection of them in her room.
-She sometimes goes to school for fun to lurk out other possible pastas with bad home lives. (They wouldn’t get assignments until theyre 18 at least)
-she’s very easily disgusted by visuals or concepts. She can’t watch Wallace and grament without wanting to die.
-she was the one that started the idea of sending assignments for the pastas, Slender agreed Bc she’s basically the daughter he always wanted. (She’s also the one who suggested they make it like a business scheme to attract those meant to be apart of the pastas so they don’t have to scout ppl out.)
-she is very strong politically and she is very open with what she has to say.
-very creative and smart, she reads often on multiple different subjects. She can speak Russian, ASL, French, Spanish and she knows Morse code. She’s trying to learn piano or violin too. She’s essentially a prodigy.
-she’s teaching some of the other pastas different languages, specifically Kate and Rouge who want to learn Morse code.
-specific requests with assignments are ran By Sally before she goes to slender with them.
Laughing Jack
Age: unknown
Wine problems: losing his final straw with puppeteer. Is about to pour hot sauce in his eyes. Eagerly awaiting dinner and sleep. Genuinely one of the only times in his life he’s ever been exhausted.
Head-cannons
-he cries after sex, no matter what.
-he thinks EJ shouldn’t be called Jack when he came first as the first Jack, but everyone calls him LJ.
-very British.
-he compliments Bloody Painters art whenever he sees it.
-Jeff is always making jokes abt how old he is and it pisses him off. (He got asked if dinosaurs really had feathers.)
-for awhile on YouTube he did ASMR without showing his face.
-he doesn’t know how to drive at all and he has a horse collection of dolls. It’s kinda weird but the pastas think it’s bc he people used to ride carriages so that’s what Jack is most used to seeing. They’re not wrong.
-he doesn’t really like music, it’s so loud for his sensitive earbuds.
-he can genuinely hear everything.
-the only movie he cried at was the Freddy Mercury movie.
Lazari
Age: 16, appears however she wants to.
Wine problems: grounded for stealing a cat, can’t go to the mansion so she’s angsty and listening to old Evanescence. Also lookin a lot like Ramona Flowers rn (blue hair version)
Head-cannons
-she eats a LOT of icecream sandwiches.
-she reads a lot of comics, her favorite comic character is Raven (Rachel Roth) Bc she relates to her backstory a lot.
-before she knew her dad, she had a creepypasta fan account. Zalgo forced her to delete it.
-when Unus Annus ended she didn’t leave her room for a week. She was a MESS
-she influenced Candypop hella when getting into the Scott Pilgrim vibe and dying hair. She was his biggest supporter.
-she reads a LOT. She used to love Twilight too.
-she was a huge Percy Jackson nerd. She wants to play Thalia in a live action series.
-if you didn’t notice she’s rlly into pop culture.
-her and Sally remain best friends Bc Lazari is the only one who gets that Sally isn’t actually 8 years old despite her looking that way.
-I’m ngl her assignments from zalgo are mostly women.
-she is a very sassy young lady. Like she says some of the most out of pocket shit and it’s so funny. The pastas have witness Lazari telling Zalgo off and it’s so silly.
Jason The Toymaker
Age: unknown
Wine problems: the last person he killed is being a nuisance and wreaking havoc in his office. Also got his spell book destroyed, so Slender ordered another one for him.
Head-cannons
-he takes hella fashion inspo from the labyrinth.
-he REFUSES to smell bad or to live bad. Like he likes his stuff at the highest quality. It’s kind of silly.
-all of his clothes is made from spider silk.
-he watches a lot of plays and musicals, genuinely loves orchestras and stuff like that.
-his nails are super sharp and he kinda hates it Bc he can’t do anything with his hands and Jeff edited him to have pink nails saying Periodt 😭 and it became a huge meme in the groupchat.
-tbh he’s kind of an oracle, like he can tell what someone’s future is going to be like. He doesn’t do it on purpose but he’s somehow always right.
-this comes in tie with his assignments. He mostly deletes preteens and teens Bc he can see their future. He’s necessary for deleting future aggressors. He deletes more than his assignments tho.
-sometimes he gets emotional when watching Disney movies Bc he thinks of found family as the creepypastas.
-ice age makes him sob so hard. Don’t tell anyone tho, he’s embarrassed.
Zero
Age: 25
Wine problems: her scarf got stolen and her cat, Maple is hiding behind the TV Ben was previously trapped in.
Head-cannons
-she is very out of the loop. Slenderman had to seriously correct her spirit once she joined. She was way too much for him and the Pastas to handle. Now it’s like a venom situation where Alice and Zero take turns with Alice’s body.
-she has a very distinct style.
-for awhile her and LJ were kind of into each other, but she got the ick once and never looked back.
-she has very random violent outbursts that are hard to deal with. Slender has a detector on her to keep an eye. She’s probably the most defiant creepypasta.
-Jeff and her hooked up once and were in a very toxic relationship that lasted 2 months. Now they ignore each other and act like they don’t exist.
-she is highly into herself. Totally has a smexy twitter account.
-for as long as she’s been with the pastas, she has grown to care for them, though she doesn’t really show that at all. She doesn’t take it personally or care how they feel about that.
Homicidal Liu
Age: 24
Wine problems: accidentally got caught up in teenage drama while bird watching at the nearest park. He’s trying to find a way to back away from the group of teens without drawling their attention. It isn’t working.
Head-cannons
-he doesn’t remember Jeff or his family.
-if you give him orange chicken he’s gonna flip a chair and rip open his shirt.
-he’s able to stomach anything but he will totally critique your food, he does not care.
-his voice is really quiet and sultry.
-he doesn’t really understand or comprehend the spirituality involving Slenderman and other pastas, but he’s put off by it.
-*NSYNC fanboy.
-his favorite movie is probably house of 1000 corpses.
-his scarf was a birthday gift from Jeff from way back when.
-Liu only kills his assignments and no one else. He doesn’t really think about what he does, like he’s confused and very out of it. Though he gets along nicely with the other pastas, he’s respected by everyone there.
-Liu genuinely eats so much food but he doesn’t mean to. Like he loves eating. He’s definitely the kitchen cutie.
-he gets carsick hella bad.
Nina the Killer
Age: 20
Wine problems: couldn’t find her stockings and slender logged her out of the hulu account as punishment for throwing a meatball at the wall during dinner yesterday.
Head-cannons
-bisexual
-her favorite movie is definitely corpse bride, she is Emily, Emily is her.
-honestly she’s kind of a popular loner in the mansion. Like she’s friends with everyone, but she spends time alone a lot.
-definitely class clown material tho.
-she doesn’t crush on Jeff anymore 😭 she’s still demented like that tho.
-one of the only other pastas that kill outside of her assignments from slender. She kills whoever slender and Sally tell her too, but after that she grows obsessive over kind strangers and ends up killing some of them too Bc she can’t handle it.
-she isn’t allowed out often, most of her assignments are required at night to lessen her obsessiveness.
-she doesn’t really obsess over the pastas in the mansion since she’s already used to them. Jeff got lucky with her Bc once he started reciprocating feelings she lost interest 😭
-if she really wanted to, she could literally do anything within 10 minutes. Like she is FAST and hella energetic and such a diva.
CandyPop
Age: unknown
Wine Problems: keeps getting his antiques stolen by Puppeteer. Killed someone with asthma and they hit their inhaler just to blow the smoke out in his face. Mf was flabbergasted.
Head-cannon
-no one knows how he came to be, not even slender 😭 Candypop himself doesn’t even know.
-overtime his purple and blue colors started switching up.
-he says he’s exactly like Ramona flowers. Scott pilgrim vs the world is his favorite movie. Ramona is his favorite character.
-he’s a straight up asshole in a Sheldon Cooper type of way.
-everytime he’s drunk, everyone leaves the house Bc of how annoying and clingy he is.
-DO NOT tell this man your secrets. Everyone will know right as soon as you say “don’t tell anyone I did this, but…”
-he cannot drive, do not trust him in the drivers or passengers seat. Somehow he will fuck it up.
-he’s BESTIES with Clockwork.
-one time he dyed his hair green and it actually looked so terrible on him but EVERYONE was hyping him up, it was so bad.
-he loves going to Denny’s at nighttime Bc he feels special for how he looks. Or Walmart. He LOVES Walmart.
Kate the chaser
Age: 26
Wine Problem: currently trying to calm the chaos before Slender and Toby get home. Also accidentally ate a special brownie while on her antidepressants after downing 3 shots of vodka (don’t do this yall). Straight up tripping balls rn.
Head-cannon
-Fiona Gallagher coded.
-dresses up as a pirate every Halloween and she’s definitely the one who makes all the Christmas cookies.
-she always decorates the house for holidays.
-since she’s Jewish, she also has a Hanukkah setup too for the other Jewish ppl there.
-definitely vegetarian.
-probably the most fit and strong pasta next to Jeff and the supernatural ones (E: LJ, EJ, Candypop, Jason)
-she’s one of the originals.
-she had a short fling with Laughing Jill. They’re like an on and off power couple tbh.
-she bought a vibrator off of wish one time and Jeff opened her package Bc he thought it had his name on it. (Jeff had an odd bruise on his nose afterwards)
-she cuts her own hair and as a joke puts it on Ben’s pillow so that he’ll think someone dyed his hair. Cracks her up everytime istg.
-she drinks coffee like it’s nobodies BUSINESS.
Eyeless Jack
Age: 25
Wine problem: Has to help Ben torture Jeff. Also got lost in the woods for two hours looking for his next target, Toby found him and picked him up once he got back from the grocery store.
Head-cannon
-is normally the last person to find out drama or news.
-has almost walked in on so many creepypastas in the bathroom. The only reason he stops is because he can see the heat light.
-sometimes can’t tell if he’s just hallucinating Bc of how his vision works.
-if you take a picture with flash, his eyes will glow like a cats.
-buys clothes in incorrect sizes all the time. Toby has to go pants shopping for him often.
-the only time he can see normally is with his human disguise on.
-he’s definitely Greek, like his mom was definitely from Greece and his dad American. He can speak Greek and Spanish Bc of highschool. English is his second language.
-he used to get made fun of for the black tar on his mask looking like tears until Ben came along and they started the tear alliance. (They’d defend each other whenever one got teased)
-I feel like whenever he’s hungry he gets increasingly more deranged. So sometimes if he’s too depressed to get his own kidneys, someone else will have to get some for him ASAP.
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lovevalley45 · 2 years
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ok so i had to go back to the insta live olivia swann jumped on today bc i got the notification for it like five minutes before my session n was kinda paying attention while i was getting ready. but i had to walk away n i heard (or thought i heard) was the words ‘foreplay’ and ‘behrad’ n was like what the Hell
so ye that plagued me for my entire session and had to go back to verify what i heard (it was “she’d flay him in a kinky way” which sure is a phrase) but it was worth going back to hear that she had like. notes for every episode abt astra n brought up the pros n cons she made for behrad around like ‘this is gus’ and it is very funny to think of astra like in her room making a pros n cons list in her journal like hm interesting
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punksocks · 10 months
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My Opinions on the Moon Signs
(Btw I’m going to reply soon, sorry life and work has been very busy this June ;0)
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Aries moon- The definition of passionate. They can be outgoing and a lot of fun. Definitely super charismatic people. Determinators (more than Aries sun sometimes imo), they’re going to get what they want done. They also really hate not being listened to or treated as the leaders in the room. When they’re mad they get passive aggressive asf and so pissy. Every Aries moon I’ve known has basically refused to be personable while they’re upset. No matter if they were older or younger than me (my grandfather was an Aries moon). They’re loud when they’re happy and loud then distressingly quiet when they’re upset. They stay mad until they decide not to be mad anymore. Then they’ll never talk about it again and be so jovial you could never guess they were upset 2 minutes ago. Good time friends and great at entertaining a crowd though.
Taurus moon- I’m biased bc my partner has this and I love them :0. Softies. They’re grounded and caring, like no one will help soothe you more than a Taurus moon. They’re really giving but it depends what they feel resource rich in. Like if they have a lot of control over their time they’ll spend days on you. But if they grew up during constant instability and financial stress they have a hard time being flexible with giving money or moving house or things like that. They’ll come around if you can show them that they can keep their physical safety. In fact, I think it’s easiest to change a Taurus moon’s mind out of all the fixed moons (in my experience).Also, They really like it when you call them on their shit and shoot straight with them. Also food, they love good food. Any tactile good time really. They’ll make you feel special if you give them affection.
Gemini moon- I don’t have a ton of experience here. Chatty but keep more to themselves than Gemini suns. Only shows you certain parts of themselves, they always have a lot on their minds. The poster child overthinkers of the zodiac (and virgo moons too ofc). Funny tho, always a sense of humor and philosophy about just about every situation.
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Cancer moon- Sweethearts. Exalted placement for a reason. Really good at sensing problems/insecurities and putting words to them. They can catch crushes easily. They need to get as much validation as they give. Like a lot. That’s one of their emotional love languages. Can be comforting or very manipulative it depends on how developed they are. One of the most creative people I ever met was a cancer moon, they were super talented and recieved a lot of praise for their great work. A sweetheart that had a lot of creative hobbies and was close to their family. Daydreamed quite a bit, but no more than any other water sign placement.
Leo moon- They don’t need to be the center of attention as often as people think, but they do need to be listened to. It means a lot to them. Can be really aggressive as kids for a period of time then they grow into themselves and can be pretty chill. Maybe a bit too chill about things they aren’t passionate about. They light up when they’re excited though. Also, they can be super competitive, like they can get in their feelings about losing at something they’re trying to show off in. (Like a video game or team sport or what have you)
Virgo moon- Very thoughtful and insightful people. They’re able to pick through and see little imperfections in people that others can not. Whether they use those powers for good or evil is truly up to them. (I have had many friends use this power for good and a relative or two use this power for evil). Everyone I’ve met with this placement has been so seriously beautiful and so aesthetically put together, idk how they do it. Doesn’t love to be called on their shit lol, you must be gentle with criticism unless you know them very very well. But they have a lot that’s on their mind and a bit they’re insecure about so you may accidentally start beef by saying something. But super perceptive people, a delight to gossip with (mercurial moons love to bond over gossip) and they have great ideas. If you have a problem to solve or analyze they’ll often have a set of solutions.
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Libra moon- don’t know a ton of them. Not super well anyway. They can be very intelligent and understand a lot about the things they like. And they bluff/charm their way through everything else. Most likely to act differently around different people to try to be the person they think whoever they’re talking to will like.
Scorpio moon- usually very goth/dark style, or they’re drawn to it. Usually just radiate intensity. But also more detached from more situations than I expect every time? They have had a lot of emotional hardships growing up and so they kind of expect to get hurt again by those they’re close to. It’s like a callous for them. If they let you in you’re very special. The developed ones are such sweethearts. Knew a manipulative one that was underdeveloped and crazy tho ngl. Like that person seemed violent and like they wanted to burn the world to feel warm. So either very sweet and stand-offish or just destructive asl.
Sagittarius moon- not my cleanest set of experiences ngl. If you’re like having a good time with one then they’re funny and can be the life of the party. Can also not know how to be emotionally supportive, but will attempt it. But my mom was my bad experience and there was a lot of explosive anger at little things mixed with being immature about others emotions. Throwing a book across the room because she didn’t understand what her (post grad) homework was or coming home angry and yelling after a bad day of work without so much as saying hi. And a lot of being mad at me and other kids for not being instantly emotionally soothed yknow? Like if I needed to sit in silence and process that would tick her off and set off a chain reaction. Explosive anger. Also forcing themselves to laugh loudly after an argument to feel better (Aries moon grandfather did this too I don’t get it). This is mainly underdeveloped energy though. I had a friend with this moon placement and they had a hard time processing their emotions and would usually breakdown for a moment then get back up again. Also people with this placement tend to get most romantically interested in unavailable people imo.
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Capricorn moon- me! And a lot of people I connected with briefly and deeply. Having terrible mothers and bonding over it lol. High standards for others even higher standards for themselves. Seems emotionally distant but will break down and cry when they feel safe and are probably alone. And they have a playlist for feeling sad I bet. You either are someone that they tell when they cry or you never know. Has to work out of seeing emotions they were shamed for as a sign of weakness. Gifts are their love language and if they can’t find the words to tell you how they feel about you they will often buy you something you mentioned you always wanted or something you needed off hand. Sentimental types, trouble right expressing it. Will talk to you about everything if they like you and nothing if they don’t. Capricorn placement most likely to go into isolation mode to really consider their relationships and place in life. Might grow suddenly distant if they feel neglected or betrayed. Underdeveloped ones are removed from their emotions in a dangerous way and in denial about all the healing they need to do.
Aquarius moon- also another set of messy personal experiences. Can come up with really out of the box solutions. Seem to either be revolutionary or very very conservative. Like most of the Aquarius moons I’ve known have been men so grain of salt but they would be the ones to most constantly say “a good woman does x” or “if you have that attitude you won’t get married” or throw shade on “girly” hobbies. You can’t change their mind. Even if you present evidence or a sound argument, hardest to get through to of all the fixed signs imo. Sometimes they’ll come back having changed their own mind. Maybe they googled whatever you said and started to believe you. But they’re not going to say you changed their mind. It’s something that they have to believe they made themselves come around on. They often have an independent sense of right and wrong. Sometimes very intelligent, sometimes just bluffing their way through it. Always will respond to opinions though. Can be really funny people, sometimes on accident. Allergic to routine and desk jobs. Usually… detached. Like if they care about you, they’re going to express it in an abstract or private way. Can be hard to tell if they care at all in my personal experiences ngl. My dad is an underdeveloped Aquarius moon and he’d often tell me to swallow my emotions and repress them and go with the way things were. (I don’t talk to my parents anymore lol, they’re narcissistic people)
Pisces moon- I’ve only known a few personally. Sometimes really surprisingly basic. Sometimes they’re just made of magic and they see the world in a whole different way. Emotionally in-tuned with people around them. If their environment is misanthropic then they’re more likely to be. If their environment is upbeat then they’re more likely to be. Most likely to grow up to be like their family/peers but assume they’re not imo. Sentimental with the folks they’re close to.
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