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#be good this year
liquidstar · 6 months
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If my mom sees a significant amount of blood she gets lightheaded, and has fainted on some occasions. Once it happened when we were kids, I wasn't there to witness it but I heard the story from my dad. Basically my brothers, around 7 or 8 at the time, were playing outside while my mom was making their lunch, and she accidentally cut her finger. It wasn't anything serious, but it drew a fair bit of blood and she passed out. My dad saw this and rushed over, but he didn't really know what to do so he just sort of started slapping her to wake her up (not recommended, but he had no idea and panicked)
At that exact moment my brothers both came in from playing, and all they saw was our mom unconscious on the floor and our dad slapping her. So, like, without even saying a word to each other they both just INSTANTLY start whaling on him, like, full blown attack mode to defend our mom. Which obviously didn't help the situation, but she did wake up and everything was fine.
Now our dad says that he's actually really glad they attacked him over what they thought was going on, because it means he raised good boys. And I still think that's true, they're very good boys.
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pangur-and-grim · 4 months
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I'm turning 30 this month, and for some reason have become suddenly interested in material possessions. like what if,,,,,,,,my couch was nice. what if my sheets were nice. is this what happens to you??
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daincrediblegg · 5 months
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OK THIS IS NOT A FUCKING DRILL EVERYONE FUCKING REPEAT AFTER ME. THIS IS WHAT YOU WILL DO WHEN YOU WATCH MUPPET CHRISTMAS CAROL THIS YEAR:
You will navigate to the page on disney plus (and it has to be here. Unless someone has actually uploaded the REAL movie anywhere else you cannot get it elsewhere)
BUT YOU WILL NOT HIT PLAY. You won’t do it. Because it’s NOT THE REAL VERSION OF THE FILM AND DISNEY IS FUCKING LYING TO YOU AS IT ALWAYS DOES
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You will scroll down HERE. To EXTRAS instead. You MUST GO HERE. This is non -negotiable
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THEN YOU WILL SCROLL DOWN TO THE BOTTOM OF THE EXTRAS AND YOU WILL THEN HIT PLAY ON THIS BAD BOY: THE FULL LENGTH VERSION
And you will watch it. And you will thank me for having been so blind and led astray by that stupid fucking mouse. You’re welcome.
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cozylittleartblog · 2 months
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cant tell you how bad it feels to constantly tell other artists to come to tumblr, because its the last good website that isn't fucked up by spoonfeeding algorithms and AI bullshit and isn't based around meaningless likes
just to watch that all fall apart in the last year or so and especially the last two weeks
there's nowhere good to go anymore for artists.
edit - a lot of people are saying the tags are important so actually, you'll look at my tags.
#please dont delete your accounts because of the AI crap. your art deserves more than being lost like that #if you have a good PC please glaze or nightshade it. if you dont or it doesnt work with your style (like mine) please start watermarking #use a plain-ish font. make it your username. if people can't google what your watermark says and find ur account its not a good watermark #it needs to be central in the image - NOT on the canvas edges - and put it in multiple places if you are compelled #please dont stop posting your art because of this shit. we just have to hope regulations will come slamming down on these shitheads#in the next year or two and you want to have accounts to come back to. the world Needs real art #if we all leave that just makes more room for these scam artists to fill in with their soulless recycled garbage #improvise adapt overcome. it sucks but it is what it is for the moment. safeguard yourself as best you can without making #years of art from thousands of artists lost media. the digital world and art is too temporary to hastily click a Delete button out of spite
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hansoeii · 9 months
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we go just right.
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theharlotofferelden · 8 months
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Genuinely loved the experience of being at camp for the first time and seeing all the companions with their tits out like they're all gonna go clubbin or some shit
Then there’s Gale
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Who's just. So utterly swagless that his clothes smell like dusty old books. My man doesn't give a fuck about the drip he's getting his ass ready for bed
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ciderbird · 3 months
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academic bias is so funny because you’ll be reading about the same historical event and one person is like “Despite the troubles that befell his homeland and near constant criticism of the court King Blorbo remained strong in the face of adversity” and the other one is like “after letting his people carry the brunt of his cringefail decisions Blorbo the Shitface refused to listen to any reason and continued to be a warmongering piece of shit. Also he was ugly.”
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fanghusband · 4 months
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may your 2024 be vampiric and homoerotic
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greenthena · 4 months
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2023 Bucket
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This is a bucket. Anything you don't want to take with you into 2024, feel free to drop it in the bucket. I will be burning the contents (with Hellfire) at exactly 11:59pm on New Year's Eve.
You don't have to type anything, at all. Just reblog the bucket and your intentions will be known by the universe. Or the bucket. Or whatever you like.
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softichill · 11 months
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I think abt this tiktok all the time
[ID: A captioned Tiktok by @nextdreadpirate. A comment in the middle of the screen says, "Always tip the maid" as a skinny white man trots into the middle of the screen. He's wearing a frilly maid's dress and cap and holding a notebook and pen. The comment disappears as he says, "Hi! Welcome to the maid cafe where we're-" He turns to the right, does the nya hand gesture with each hand, then kicks up a heel, showing off a black pump. "-cuter than kittens!" He finishes, then drops the pose and turns back to face the camera, shuffling a bit closer and leaning in as he talks. "I'm the diversity hire, Bryson. Are you here for the gamer discount?"
A door opens in the background, and Bryson stands up and turns to the left, holding out a warning hand. "Okay, I can explain," he says to people offscreen, starting to laugh. Someone laughingly says, "Oh my god," and another person starts laughing as the video ends. End ID]
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a-flickering-soul · 10 months
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OTC BIRTH CONTROL APPROVED BY THE FDA
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hattersarts · 8 months
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im already at the south downs cottage guys, catch up
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ato-dato · 8 months
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One mans barber can be another mans nemesis.
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threeheartts · 9 months
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me lately once again
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marinecanary · 21 days
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Kristen "the greatest cleric of our age" Chilis Applebees
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panthermouthh · 4 months
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“Accursed creator! Why did you form a monster so hideous that even you turned from me in disgust?”
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