#because I think I just have to leave everything alone for a while to improve my mental health

[uglyducklingofthe2000s]

Millionaires Boys Club - LN

Summary: Lando is reminded that something can't be bought no matter how many millions he has in his bank account. Money doesn't fix a broken heart.

ex!reader

No part 2 requests please

If there was a point in his life that Lando knew he'd fucked up. It was when y/n broke up with him.

The slow head shake, stepping back away from him as if she was scared he'd hurt her, red puffy eyes that looks raw, her wobbling voice telling him to just leave her alone.

He knew he could get her bad but that moment truly made him realise the type of power and trust she'd placed in him but he'd broken it. But now he's going to fix it.

So he did what any many with millions in the bank does.

He was going to win her back with gifts. Everything he could think of and she could ever dream of.

Or so he thought.

"I don't know who you thought you were dating but I'm beginning to think you don't know your ex girlfriend at all." Max sighs as he opens his boot to reveal every single gift Lando had sent y/n still wrapped and untouched.

Even flowers that were wilted and dying had been left in their original packaging. It didn't look like any of the notes were opened and read.

"I don't get it. What the hell do I have to do?" Lando groans dropping his head back. "She's being so difficult. I just spend god knows how much on all this stuff."

"You ever thought maybe she doesn't want her ex buying her back?" Max questions making him look at his friend. "I'm just saying mate. You've spend all this money on her but clearly you not buying her stuff wasn't the problem."

Lando had been very elusive about what triggered the break up. He'd seemed to keep the details vague just saying it he didn't understand what had happened really.

"You tried talking to someone who has you blocked?" Lando grumbles when Max suggests he just try calling her. He'd tried.

"Then maybe it's time to give up and let her go mate, you can't force her to forgive you for whatever you're not telling my you did." Max states earning a huff. "Maybe figure out what you did that landed you single again and then try again if you're not going to give up."

-

Y/n sighs as she steps outside with her sisters dog and immediately Lando jumps out his car like a crazed stalker and practically throws himself at her.

"Jesus Christ." Y/n gasps stumbling away while her sisters dog excitedly jumps up at Lando. "Worst guard dog ever."

"I could get you a better one if you think you need it."

"For god sake-when is it going to compute Lando? Money is not going to fix this." Y/n frowns and it becomes all too apparent within seconds that Lando has made something snap.

More tears appear. She's hurting, which is why she has been hiding out at her sisters in hopes of Lando being too scared of her sister's fiancé who is very protective over his future sister-in-law to come see her. Clearly that plan backfired.

Being vulnerable isn't something Lando is familiar with. But he knows he's at a loss of what he's meant to do here.

"Y/n, I-"

"Lando, I can't do this. Not now. I need-You need give me space and time and just...let me think." Y/n states swallowing thickly. "And stop buying things because it's not going to win me back. I don't want you to buy me things all the time. You broke my heart, Lando. Money didn't break it, so it's not going to fix it."

Lando is somewhat stunned by her words.

It's not as if he parents raised him to believe that money is the end all and be all. But he does think it's pretty important in general, he definitely feels better after buying something. Hell, when y/n walked out he bought himself a new Lando Rover to improve his mood.

Though now he's thinking about it, it didn't really do anything to perk him up or distract him from his newly single status.

Lando watches y/n walk off before hearing the door open and close.

"You know...she's not upset because you're here." Y/s/n states as she walks over to the F1 driver. "She's upset because she wants you here...but she wants you to understand what you did."

Lando looks at y/n's sister with a sigh before she sends him a sympathetic smile and rubs his arm bicep gently.

"You'll figure out how to fix this, but buying her stuff...she doesn't want you for you money."

"Thanks y/s/n." Lando mumbles not adding that as the days go on. He's beginning to doubt that he has that ability.

-

Lando sighs as he inserts the new SIM card into his phone. He had to get a new one purely so he could call y/n. Grovelling might be easier if he didn't have the start of the F1 calendar in full swing.

"Hello?" Y/n answers leaving Lando clinging to just that word as some comfort that she's at least ok. "Hello?"

"Hi, y/n." Lando greets hoping the line isn't about to go dead.

"Lando...how's testing going?" Y/n asks softly seeming to try and keep the conversation light.

"It could be better. You should be here." Lando states earning a sigh immediately. "Y/n...I know I fucked up and I know I don't deserve you. I-I know that I didn't care about the stuff that was important to you and I should-I do now. I care and I want you to be here with me. Always."

"How am I supposed to know that you mean any of this?" Y/n mumbles the swallowing thickly. "I don't want to be with you and things to go back to how they were...you got annoyed at me for being upset that you cancelled our anniversary plans."

Their two year anniversary.

Y/n had spent weeks planning it around all the F1 and McLaren stuff, along with making sure Lando could go on all his winter break trips with no interruption. She'd planned something just for them and Lando cancelled because he wanted to do something for Quadrant.

Usually she'd be ok with that, but they both know it was something the Quadrant team could've handled without him being there. He made the choice to throw all her effort away and then didn't understand when she got upset.

It wasn't even about the fact it was the only celebration of the milestone. It was the fact he knew she'd gone to such lengths so they could celebrate it and he didn't care.

"I'm sorry, y/n. You deserve better than me, but I'm too selfish to really let you go and find better." Lando states then sighing. "I'm also going to do better than I had been doing. I promise you."

Y/n is quiet on the other side for a bit amping up his nerves. He knows that he is sort of winning her over because she'd have hung up or told him that this was a waste of time.

"Would you hate me if I pay for you to fly over here?"

"Yeah, I'll let you pay." Y/n laughs then clearing her throat.

"I'm going to rearrange all the anniversary celebrations too." Lando declares making her laugh. "What?"

"Lando, you are an amazing man with a lot of abilities but arranging celebrations like that isn't not your forte."

"Give me a chance. A man trying to redeem himself shouldn't be doubted."

-

Lando insisted on picking y/n up from the airport and he finds himself in complete awe of seeing her again.

"Come here baby." Lando grins making her drop her bags and run towards him. A perfect airport scene from a movie if there ever was one.

He catches her, lifting her body up as she wraps her legs around his waist as they catch each other in a kiss that is so long await that neither realised how badly they needed it.

"Slap me next time. Slap me and knock sense into me next time I'm stupid enough to fuck up so badly that you have to leave me." Lando states making her lean back away from him for a moment. "Serious, just slap me."

"Ok. I will." Y/n smiles with a nod before she slowly drops her legs from the man's waist but he keeps hold of her waist. "I missed you...a lot."

"I missed you to. And...I never want to fuck up that colossally again." Lando promises before kissing her gently. "I'm sorry I ever did to begin with. I was being a dick."

"You won't find me arguing with you there." Y/n smiles before she shifts back going to pick up her bags that she'd dropped only for him to tsk and pick them up for her. "Oh sorry, I forgot you have to do everything for me now."

"Everything and maybe a little more, till you tell me we might finally be even."

Taglist: @namgification @hiireadstuff @jsjcue @geniusalpaca @itsjustkhaos

#f1 #fanfic #formula 1 #lando norris x reader #lando norris #lando norris imagine #ln4 x reader #lando norris x y/n #lando x reader #lando #norris #lando norris mclaren #lando norris one shot #lando norris fluff #lando norris angst #lando norris x you #lando norris fanfic #lando norris imagines #ln4 #ln4 angst #ln4 imagine #ln4 fic #ln4 fluff #mclaren #mclaren f1 #mclaren formula 1 #mclaren racing #ln4 one shot #ln4 x you #ln4 x y/n

[elliezato]

❀˙⋆Summer With You⋆˙❀

Pairing: Ellie x Reader

-Modern au!

Summary: You and your friends decide to rent out a cabin on the beach over the summer. This was your last summer before leaving for college, so you wanted to make it memorable. This summer was going to be perfect. You spent your days in the water, taking In the moments in the sun with your friends.

It didn't take long for you to realize your feelings for your best friend Ellie.

The way her wet hair drips down her shoulders as she gets out of the water. The way her fingers strum the guitar as you gather around the fire. The way the stars light her eyes during late night swims. The way her smile grows when she’s with her girlfriend… It's all too much.

Will these feelings ruin your friendship and the whole summer? What will happen when it's time to leave Ellie behind for college?

Word Count: 4.4k

⋆˚✿˖°

a/n: Im back!! I've been in the summer mood recently and I just need to be laying out by the lake rn. I recently read "SYNS" by carmellie and was inspired to make this! I've really been wanting to write a slow burn, angst fic so I hope this turns out good.

I will probably split this story into a few parts depending on how long I want this to be.

This will be my first real fic because honestly I've only written smut in the past and I'm not sure if I like writing stuff like that. I might add a little bit of it every now and then in my stories but it's not something I want to continue to write.

Anyway, I'm super exited for this story! Please give me ideas for future chapters! I love to hear feedback on how to improve or what you guys like.

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Packing your bag was the only thing you weren't looking forward to doing on this trip. You always over packed and struggled to fit everything in your bags. Clothes and shoes were thrown all over your room as you pick out what you should pack. This trip is going to be 2 months long so you need enough clothes to last through the summer but not too much that your car will be over flowing.

"Eww, do not bring that" Dina says in disgust as you hold up an old one piece bathing suit from freshmen year.

You knew she was right, but you didn't have many options when It came to bathing suits. You packed it anyway, along with some other suits from the previous summer. The sun shined through your window, lighting up the room. It was almost noon and you needed to leave soon. The drive to the cabin would take the majority of the day so there wasn't much time to waste.

Dina helped you load your car with your bags. There wasn't a lot of room in the trunk but you two made it work. You slam the truck shut, making sure it wouldn't pop open from all the clothes. Your parents hug you goodbye in your drive way as you and Dina get ready to leave.

You get into your car and put the top of your convertible down. The breeze felt nice in your hair as you drove off. Music plays as you sing your heart out. This was going to be a good trip, you could feel it. Dina pulls out her digital camera and snaps a pic of you driving as your hair blows in the wind. Your sun glasses reflect the trees lining the road.

It's been a long time since you've been on a nice trip. Let alone with all your friends. Nerves start to build as you get closer to the cabin. Ellie and Jesse were supposed to meet you there. Recently it's been awkward with Ellie. Usually you two could talk for hours and spend every second together but things have been different.

⋆˚✿˖°

You noticed this sudden shift in your friendship during one of your sleepovers a few months ago. Ellie was sitting on the floor of your bedroom while you were getting ready for bed. She starts going on a rant about this girl she's been thinking about asking out. You don't know what happened but in that moment you felt this strange rage fill in your heart.

Ellie has always been open about girls she finds attractive but she's never made any moves. The thought of your best friend dating another girl upset you for some reason. You've never felt this before and decided to just let it go.

"She so pretty y/n! Like I really think I'm going to make my move" Ellie scrolls on her phone as she talks to you.

You look into the mirror while washing the rest of the soap off your face. "Go for it Els, you could probably pull anyone"

"Yeah, I know" Ellie says sarcastically, now putting down her phone.

She walks over to you and meets your gaze in the reflection on the bathroom mirror. Your eyes revert down to the counter. For some reason you felt your body tremble as she got closer. You couldn't understand why you were acting like this. You've known Ellie your whole life and never saw her as anything other than your best friend.

She picks up her toothbrush and you leave the bathroom. You lay in bed waiting for Ellie to finish in the bathroom. She noticed the sudden change in your demeanor. After a few minutes your friend turns off the lights and lays nexts to you in bed.

"You ok?" Ellie turns to look at you. Her hand rubs up and down your arm.

"Yeah, Im just tired" You lied. You were wide awake but the thoughts of Ellie swarmed your mind.

Things have been like this ever since then. Every time you guys hung out, you two always end up in awkward situations. You hated the fact that things felt like this. You almost convinced yourself that maybe your friendship isn't as strong and it use to be. Maybe you two are drifing apart. You prayed that this wasn't the case but it was the only logical way to explain the distance between you two.

⋆˚✿˖°

"Can we pull over? I have to pee and Im starving" Dina throws her head back into the seat.

"Yeah, I need to get gas anyway" You pull into a gas station and Dina runs in as you follow shortly behind her.

The area was very unfamiliar. There wasn't many people around. You walk inside the convince store and pick out a few snacks and your friend finishes up in the bathroom. You look over to pick out what you want and see a package of watermelon sour patch kids. These were Ellie's favorite. You guys use to walk to the gas station when you were younger and eat these on the curb in the summer heat.

You pick up two bags, one for yourself and one to give Ellie when you see her later tonight. Dina grabs her snacks and you pay. You quickly fill up your tank and get back onto the road. You put the top of your conferable back up now that it's getting darker and the air is cooling down.

The rest of the drive was quiet. Dina slept as you listed to music softly. Superache by Conan filled the car as your mind thought about Ellie. She was all you could think about for the rest of the drive. You were excited to see her, hoping she felt the same.

A few hours later you pull into the driveway of the cabin. You looked at the familiar car already in front of you.

"It looks like they're already here" You nudge Dina, trying to wake her.

You text the group chat, letting your friends know you arrived. As you get out of the car to help unload all your bags you hear your name being called out from a small distance. You look up and see Ellie and Jesse walking towards you to greet you and help with the bags.

"Y/N!! You guys took long enough." Ellie pulls you into a tight hug and then turns to Dina to welcome her.

Your eyes were glued to Ellie. She was dressed in a pair of jorts that ended a few inches above her knees. Her shirt displayed the album cover of her favorite band she took you to see last semester. She wore her old converse that probably need to be replaced sometime soon.

You guys walk into the cabin with all the bags. It was beautiful. Trees surround the land and fireflies lit up every now and then around the house. You could see a glimpse of the ocean from the front. You walk into the cabin and place your bags onto the floor.

"You guys have to see the view!" Ellie grabs your wrist to bring you to the backyard.

Dina and Jesse followed as Ellie opened the backdoor for everyone. As she opened the door you were met with the view of the beach in the distance. Lanterns lit the path leading down to a fire pit. Lights were strung across the yard, lighting up every inch. You closed your eyes and listened to the waves crashing in the distance and the bugs humming from the trees.

"Holy shit. This is insane!" Your eyes light up thinking about all the memories that are about to be made here.

"Lets go down to the beach!" Jesse says as he's already sprinting down to the sand.

"I'll be there in a minute, Im going to change into a bathing suit." You begin to walk back inside until you feel a tug on your arm.

"Come onnnn!" Ellie drags you down to the beach with everyone else.

There wasn't anyone on the beach. It was more of a reserved area for residents only. You kick off your shoes as you stumble down to the water. You watch as your friends run into the waves laughing and taking in the moment. Ellie looks over at you from the water smiling, motioning you to come in. You roll your eyes and walk into the water. It was oddly warm. You cringe at the fact you're still dressed in your clothes from the drive here.

You suddenly gasp as you feel yourself getting pushed into the water. "Hey!" You sit as waves crash over you.

Ellie looks down at you and laughs but it doesn't last long before Jesse pushes her in. "What the fuck!"

You're now laughing at the sight of her drenched in the water. She grabs your hand and helps you up as you two are now dripping wet. You look up and notice how bright the stars are here. Back home you can barely see the stars. The city isn't the best place for star gazing. You can feel your body start to shiver.

The wet cloths that cling to your body get colder by each second. Ellie notices and pulls you close. "Lets go back up and change"

You take your bag of clothes and bring it it your room. Your eyes widen when you realize the room you were sharing with Ellie only has one bed. You don't understand why you're in shock. You've shared a bed with Ellie many times in your life but for some reason you felt weird about it.

"Nice right?" She says as she walks past you into the room.

The room was nice. It was open and had big windows looking out to the ocean. You place your bags down next to the bed and pull out a pair of pjs. You feel her eyes on you as you walk to the bathroom to shower and change for the night.

You take your time getting unready. Turing on the shower as you slip out of your wet clothes. The water is hot and feels nice against your shivering skin. Fingers run through your scalp as you wash out the salty water, tasting it on your lips as it washes over your face.

You dry off your body and put on fresh clothes. You throw your wet hair up into a towel as you wash your face. As you exit the bathroom you notice Ellie is no longer in the room. You walk downstairs to the kitchen to see all your friends sitting at the island laughing.

"Were ordered pizza, I hope that's fine" Dina says smiling, then returning to her conversation

"Im literally starving, I could fuck up some pizza right now" You say as you sit and join them at the island.

"I think Cat is going to join us for a week. She's supposed to be here next Saturday" Ellie looks at you waiting for a reaction.

You immediately feel a frown forming on your face. You hated Cat. You hated how she practically stole Ellie from you, and now she's coming on your trip!? Ever since Ellie made her move on Cat they've been inseparable. She never referred to Cat as her girlfriend but you knew it was coming. The way Ellie looks at her. It hurts. You figured it was just because she doesn't spend all her time with you anymore. Maybe you're just jealous that Ellie's time is being taken up by someone else.

You were looking forward to spending time with Ellie on this trip and now she's inventing Cat? You felt your heart drop at the thought of Ellie spending the next week with her.

"That's exciting" You say as you force a smile but it's clear your upset.

Suddenly there's a knock at the door. "That's probably the pizza" Jesse gets up and walks to the front door.

You make your way over to the living room with a box of pizza in your hands. You place the box down on the coffee table next to the other boxes. Ellie hands you a glass of water as she takes a seat next to you on the couch.

"What movie are we watching?" You feel Ellie's body shift next to you as she grabs the remote to scroll through the options.

"Want to rewatch Bottoms? I don't think Dina or Jesse have seen it yet."

"YES!" She searches up the movie and hits rent without any hesitation.

⋆˚✿˖°

The night was nice. You rested your head on Ellies shoulder as you watch the movie. The boxes of pizza are practically empty except for the left over crust from Ellie that she refuses to eat. The movie was almost over and you could feel your eyes getting tired. You've already seen this move a million times so you decided to go ahead and go to bed.

"Where are you going" Ellie looks up at you as you remove yourself from her arms.

"Im going to head up to bed. Im tired from driving all day. I'll see you guys in the morning" You smile and say goodnight to Jesse and Dina.

"Okay, goodnight! I'll be up there right when the movie ends." She gives you a soft smile in return.

The bed was comfortable. It was easy to get settled in as you wait for Ellie's presence. Your eyes close as you wait for her. You could feel yourself drifting off until you hear the sound of the door opening. Your body turns towards the door and you open your eyes to see Ellie walking into the room.

"Sorry, did I wake you up" She quietly closes the door.

"No, I was still up." You watch as she pulls out her toothbrush from her bag and walks to the bathroom.

She eventually joins you in bed. Her body was close. You could feel her settling into the mattress. The widow was slightly open, allowing the sound of the waves crashing to fill the room. The fan kept the room at a cool temperature as you pull the covers higher up your body.

"Do you like Cat" Ellie breaks the silence and turns to face you in the bed waiting for a response.

Her face was close. You could feel her gentle breath on your cheeks as she waited for you to answer. You knew you couldn't tell her the truth. She's your best friend. There's no reason for you dislike Cat, but you did, but you couldn't tell her that.

"Yeah. Why?" Your response was cold and blunt.

"You just always change the subject when I bring her up or you just seem to always get upset." She frowns. "I just really want you to like her because I think I'm going to make things official with her."

You almost was to cry when you hear those words come out of her mouth. Your heart aches. You knew this was coming but you prayed it wouldn't happen. You wished things would fall through between them. You hated that you felt this way. You wanted Ellie to be happy. You really did but you've been letting your emotions get in the way.

"Do whatever you want Ellie" You turn to face the opposite way. You didn't mean for your response to come out as harsh as it did, but it was too late.

"This is exactly what I was talking about. I don't understand why you're being like this" Her voice is harsh. "Ever since I told you about Cat you've been so distant. I don't know why you're being like this but clearly you need space."

You feel her get up from the bed. "Where are you going?" You sit up and look at her.

"Giving you space. You obviously are upset with me and I don't know why." She gets up and leaves the room.

You lay back down on your back as the tears that formed in your eyes begin to fall down your cheeks. Her words stung but she was right. You feel bad for being so short with Ellie, she doesn't deserve it. Your whole life you and Ellie have been so close. You told each other everything. The reason your friendship is changing was because of you.

After tossing and turning in the empty bed for a while you look over at your bag and see the candy you bought for Ellie but forgot to give her. You decide to get up and find her, still feeling bad about earlier. The room was dark and hard to navigate but you found the door. You walk downstairs to see Ellie laying on the couch. She's wrapped up in a small blanket, sleeping softly. You sit on the edge of the couch and look at her with a feeling of guilt settling in your stomach.

"y/n?" She slowly opens her eyes and looks at you.

"Im sorry Els." You look at her with damp eyes. "Im sorry I've been so distant and I'm sorry for being rude." You wipe your tears trying to gain composer.

Ellie sits up and wraps her arms around you, bringing you close to her body. She wipes your tears as she holds you. "Stop crying. Im not mad at you, Im just confused."

"I know and Im sorry" You rest your head on her chest.

You eventually lay down on the couch with her. There isn't too much room but you make it work. Your bodies press against each other as you close your eyes. Her arms are wrapped around your waist, still trying to calm you down. You quickly fall asleep, feeling that your friendship is returning to what it once was.

⋆˚✿˖°

You wake up alone on the couch, hearing chatter from the kitchen. Sitting up and looking over you see your friends making breakfast. The air smells of salt and pancakes.

"Look who's finally up" Jesse says teasingly as he flips a pancake.

"You hungry?" Ellie asks as she holds up a plate of food she had already prepared for you.

You get up from the couch and sit at the table. The kitchen had huge windows that had the perfect view on the backyard and the beach. The cabin was so pretty during the day. The sunlight lit up the whole house. You look up as you see Ellie placing a plate in front of you. She sits down and joins you for breakfast.

"Do you have any plans in mind for today" She looks up at you as she takes a bite of pineapple.

"I really want to explore this area and go to the beach." You smile at her as you spread the butter on your pancakes.

You put on your bathing suit and then some shorts over as a coverup. The weather was hot but not humid. There was nice breeze outside. There were a bunch of beach bikes on the side of the cabin for guest so you and your friends decided to explore on them.

Wind blew through your hair as you rode down the dirt paths from the cabin to the nearest sidewalk. Music played through Ellie's speakers as you rode. You eventually came across a small beach town with restaurants and shops. There were people walking through with friends and family enjoying the start of summer break.

You tied your bikes to a post and decided to walk around. "This place is so cute!" You take out you phone to take some pictures.

Dina points out a small local coffee shop and starts walking towards it. You guys enter the shop and order coffees to start your morning. Ellie wasn't a huge coffee person so she got a refresher.

"Els you need to try this!" You hand her your drink waiting for her to take a sip.

"No thanks. I really don't like coffee" She pushes your drink away.

"Seriously Ellie, its so good, you have to try it" You push your cup back into her hands.

She hands you her drink so you can try it as she takes a sip of your coffee. "This is disgusting!" She cringes as the taste of coffee lingers in her mouth.

She takes her drink back and washes out the bitter taste of coffee from her mouth. The coffee wasn't even strong, it was mostly washed out with a sugary creamer. You laugh watching Ellie's reaction to the coffee and took it back from her hands.

The town was small so it didn't take long to explore it. You guys planned on trying every restaurant here over the summer. The breeze from the ocean felt nice. The air smelt of salt and coffee.

You and your friends got back onto your bikes and rode down to the beach. The weather was starting to get warmer as noon approached. You set you bike up again the beach entrance and step onto the sand. You take off your shoes and toss them into your bag and walk down to the water. Ellie follows shortly behind and sits down on the towel that Dina places on the warm sand.

You join Ellie on the towel as Dina and Jesse head towards the water. "Im sorry about last night, I was just tired. I don't even remember why I was upset." You say looking at Ellie as she takes a sip of her drink.

"Y/n, it's really ok, I'm not mad. I just want us to go back to how we use to be" She admits as she meets your gaze.

"Me too" You smile and rest your head on her shoulder as you watch your friends splashing each other in the waves.

⋆˚✿˖°

The first week was perfect. You spent your days at the beach and cooking out in the backyard of the cabin. Jesse and Ellie set up hammocks in the back, so you guys could star gaze and talk until the sun starts to rise. Things were going better than you imagined. Your relationship with Ellie was better than ever. You two did everyone together.

"Cats going to be here in a few minutes!" Ellie impatiently checks her phone waiting for Cat's arrival text.

You sit at the island finishing your breakfast. The windows were open, allowing the fresh air to calm you down. You've been dreading this since Ellie first brought up the fact that Cat was even visiting. The thought of Ellie spending all her time with Cat made you sick. You didn't want to lash out again so you kept your feelings to yourself.

A ding from Ellie's phone interrupted your conversation followed by a loud knock at the door. "She's here!" Ellie jumped from her seat and walked over to the front door.

Cat stood at the entrance with her bag. She was dressed in shorts and a tank top with an opened button down on top. You took in the image of Ellie's face lighting up as she looked Cat up and down. You watched as she pulled her into a tight hug. Ellie leaded her into the kitchen with everyone else.

"Hi guys! Thanks for letting me stay for a few days" She smiles and then looks at you.

You return the smile but its obvious you're annoyed. Cat takes the hint and turns back too Ellie. They walk upstairs so she could put up her bags.

Dina looks over at you with a frown. "You ok y/n?"

"Yeah... why?" You look at her with a confused and saddened expression.

Dina caught on to your feelings for Ellie a long time ago. You've never admitted to them because honestly you never thought of Ellie in that way. At least not until recently. It's all been so confusing.

"She's only going to be here for five days, it'll go by fast" Dina tries to reassure you but it just makes things worse.

"I know, I think we'll have fun. And Ellie's happy" You try to convince your friends you're ok, and maybe you're trying to convince yourself too.

Ellie returns downstairs with Cats hand in hers. The sight makes you want to cry but you suck in your feelings and try to avoid them. You knew these next few days would be hard. Not only did you have to watch your best friend fall in love with someone else but you had to get rid of any feelings you have for her.

You didn't even know you liked her but it makes sense now. It's all coming together. Why did you feel this way? You've known Ellie all your life. Why are you just now realizing these feelings? The way she makes you feel when her fingers are running through your hair. The way she holds you close at night. The way she immediately drops everything when you need her.

Your thoughts shatter in your mind when you see Cats lips against Ellie's. You can't help but sit and stare. Ellie never told you they were official yet. Why didn't she tell you?

Your emotions took over and you left. You didn't know where you were going but your keys were in your hand and you were already half way to you car.

"Y/n!? Where are you going?" Ellie follows you as you walk out the door. Cat standing behind. She stands at the door frame as she watches you pull out of the drive way.

The air was much needed. You drove down the roads of the beach. tears building up in your eyes. You had hopes that this drive would distract you but the only thing on your mind was Ellie. Why did you let your feelings get the best of you again. She clearly doesn't like you. She has Cat.

You find yourself sitting in a cafe looking out at the beach. The thoughts Ellie holding you floods your mind. You hate yourself for feeling like this. What would she think if she knew about how you felt? Would this ruin everything between you two? Would your friendship be over for good?

You immediately snap out of your thoughts as you look down and notice a text from Ellie.

⋆˚✿˖°

a/n: Thank you for reading!! Im already working on the next chapter. I hope my writing gets stronger as I write more because I feel like this could be more detailed:( Please, please, pleaseeee give me feedback! I love hearing others opinions! Im excited to continue this story because honestly I have no idea where the plot is going to go yet. The next chapters should be longer as they come out. Im not expecting this to be too long but let me know what you guys want for the future chapters!<3

#ellie the last of us #ellie williams #ellie tlou #the last of us #tlou #ellie williams tlou #tlou2 #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x you #wlw #sapphic #slow burn #angst #ellie williams fanfic #tlou fanfiction #ellie williams x female reader

[ofswordsandpens]

what do you think could’ve been done better regarding camp half-blood besides spending more time there/pacing? i’d love to hear your thoughts!

!! okay I know you're specifically asking for things that could have been done better beyond spending more time at CHB, but straight up that one issue is really the crux of everything. -- The time we spend at CHB before the quest in the show is half the time we do in the book. (And for a different frame of reference, the book is aprox. 40% over by the time the trio is leaving camp borders.)

And since the show runners halved the pre-quest chb runtime, as a result we lose quite a bit of content that helped to establish context, tone, foreshadowing, character dynamics etc.

Because we have to prioritize Percy and Luke's relationship in the show, it forces the rest of the relationships that were established in CHB in the book into the background, (or simply makes them none existent):

We have pretty much only ever been told verbally about Luke and Annabeth's bond by this point (episode 5). They have a two second interaction at camp that's not particularly noteworthy and that's that. Imo that's not particularly compelling story telling lol. We'll likely (hopefully) get something from episodes 6-8, but I maintain we still should've gotten something more substantial between Luke and Annabeth at camp. I've said before, at bare minimum the show should have had Luke see them off at Thalia's tree like he did in the book.

I've mentioned this before but Annabeth and Percy's dynamic had a much greater establishment in chb in the book because she's the one that's his guide at camp and she actively seeks him out more. In the show, we have to give this role to Luke and while I can give this change between book to screen more leeway because, yes, we have the entire quest to build Percy and Annabeth's dynamic, I still didn't like that it pretty much forced Annabeth into the periphery in the show. As a result, it made her seem a lot more distant and aloof than she ever was in the book. (Shoutout to Leah's armor strap improv, she's doing more for Annabeth than the show runners are).

2. We don't really get see the effects of Percy being claimed as Big Three Kid at camp:

Yeah, Percy moves into the new cabin in the show but then almost immediately after he's off on his quest. Meanwhile in the book, Percy's claimed as a big three kid... and then we see how it ostracizes him.

He misses being in the Hermes' cabin. Campers avoid him. He sleeps and eats alone now. He has to have solo lessons with Luke because the others are scared. He's miserable! And none of those experiences were translated to screen.

Again, they told us that big three kids are taboo, but have not shown that impact.

Like the difference in reaction during the claiming scene between the book and the show pretty much sums up this discrepancy.

3. General loss of foreshadowing and tone:

Because we don't get as much Annabeth, we lose how in the book, she had been aware that something was wrong with the gods and surmised that something was stolen long before the quest. She shared this with Percy. It was a great showcase of her intelligence. It helped set the tone that something was wrong before the quest even stared. And all of it just, didn't really make the cut.

The hellhound attack also didn't make it and its just another loss of foreshadowing. Luke was straight up trying to kill this kid from day one. Percy was not safe even at camp. Things weren't okay ever.

The weather! Yes the boundary keeps the weather mild at camp but in the book Percy remarks on the huge storms that surround them at one point. Before he leaves there's a storm so bad approaching that the campers are nervous. Even before he got to CHB there were "inexplicable" storms all the time. I wish this had been maintained in the show even beyond the camp. The gods, Zeus, they aren't happy.

Also, I tried rewatching the episodes to find this convo but I couldn't so please let me know if it's there somewhere but I don't think Luke conveyed anywhere in the show that his quest "messed things up" for anyone? Like, sure, they could include this at the end, but I think it's more impactful when we see more hints of his bitterness early on.

4. Minor Nitpicks + More things I miss:

Annabeth should have gotten soaked by Percy's Supreme Lord Bathroom moment like she did in the book. Percy had flooded the entire bathroom and she wasn't speared. In fact, Percy was the only person who wasn't wet.

The self-filling goblets in the book + the blue Coke moment.

I wish the show had Percy like, white knuckling his minotaur horn refusing to let it go. In the book he saw it as the last souvenir of his mother, refused to let anyone else hold, and was afraid it would be taken.

Rip Argus :(

#oh I've been waiting for this one TURN IT UP!! #pjo show crit #edit: I said foreground instead of background nobody say anything :(

[girlgenius1111]

we don't have to talk about it

part 2 of cool about it because you're all depressed

warnings: heavy descriptions of depression + depressive thoughts. self harm. maybe we'll make reader go to therapy in the next installment.

also i didn't proofread this purely so i can read it before bed and feel all warm and fuzzy inside

Alexia made a conscious effort to be more attentive to your mood, noticing highs and lows. You still struggled to let her in, and tell her when you weren't doing well, but it was improving. Mostly because of how persistent she was.

Alexia knowing, and just being there, was so helpful. It had been so long since you'd really struggled, and things were going well in your life, generally, so it caught you off guard when things started to worsen.

It was a few months after Alexia really learned about the depths of you mental health struggles, and both of you were incredibly busy. So busy, in fact, that neither of you really noticed that you weren't doing well. You chalked up your low energy to exhaustion from the season, and stress, and Alexia didn't think to question it.

It only hit you, what was really going on, when the Alexia left on national duty, and you remained in Barcelona. While England had been eliminated from the Nations League, you still had friendlies to play, but you'd picked up a minor concussion, and stayed behind, not wanting to risk anything for a friendly.

10 days without Alexia was not something you were looking forward too, and 10 days without Alexia, while you couldn't practice, sounded pretty awful. Maybe this is what caused your slump, or maybe it was some combination of the concussion and being alone with nothing to do. Or maybe, it was just something that happened.

You liked to think you had the depression beat, completely managed. Trying to find a cause to attribute your low mood too was your way of convincing yourself that you were fine. Normally it worked.

A few days after Alexia left, you realized what was going on. You had returned from dropping her at the airport, immediately falling asleep on the couch. You normally didn't nap, only when you weren't feeling right, so when you woke up a few hours later, you were already suspicious. This suspicion only remained over the next couple days, growing with each irritating symptom.

Leaving the house was an ordeal. You tried to get out everyday, you really did, but everything made your head hurt, and it was so much easier to stay in. And you were so, so, tired. Exhaustion that settled in your bones, that didn't fade even marginally, no matter how much you slept. You found yourself stressing over simple things, like what to reply to Alexia's good morning text, or what to eat for lunch. You made excuses for why you couldn't spend time with your teammates that had also remained in Barcelona, because none of them were Alexia, and Alexia was all you wanted.

You just didn't feel right. All you wanted to do was lay down and do nothing. Something within you ached, and you couldn't get rid of it. And with the ache, came insecurity. All the progress you'd made, letting Alexia see this part of you, vanished as soon as things got a little harder than normal. You had a lot of time to think, and think you did. About how sure you were that Alexia really didn't wan't to deal with this, with you like this.

Part of you wanted her, desperately, and the other part wouldn't allow it. It was so confusing, like all your emotions were contradicting each other. As a result, you pulled back a little. Answering her texts with shorter responses, making excuses about why you couldn't call. You told yourself that it was because you wanted her to focus on the games she was playing. Really, it was because you knew the minute she talked to you for more than 5 minutes, she'd know something wasn't right.

You were used to the decent into feeling worthless when you were depressed. It had never quite been this bad before; the regular feelings seemed to combine with the immense guilt you felt. Guilt for not letting Alexia in, and for letting her in too much. For not being strong enough to go 10 days without her, just 10 days, without completely collapsing. The guilt made you feel worse, until it was almost unbearable. Until it was unbearable. That was around day 7.

Day 9 was when you did the thing you promised yourself that you would never do again. You couldn't help it, really. Everything in your brain was screaming at you that you weren't good, weren't trying hard enough, weren't good enough at anything.

In hindsight, maybe trying to get rid of guilt by doing something that had, historically, made you feel incredibly guilty, was not the best plan. With each cut, the guilt weighing on you grew, until it stopped. Until there was nothing, you felt nothing, except the sharp sting on your thigh. You finally had a moment of peace, but it didn't last long.

Because, fuck, Alexia was going to be home tomorrow. Perfect, sweet Alexia, who took herself so seriously, and who blamed herself whenever anything went wrong.

You didn't cry, you didn't think you could, but you wanted to. As you disinfected and bandaged your thigh, you wished that you would feel the sting of tears in your eyes, but none came. Tears would have been a sign that you were coming out of this, whatever was happening to you.

You went to bed that night, not setting an alarm because you didn't need to get Alexia from the airport until the afternoon. You drifted off, buried on her side of the bed, wearing only her clothes, clinging to her pillow desperately. Every movement you made stung your leg, and you were reminded of what you'd done to yourself. You couldn't remember the last time it had been this bad, this heavy, this incapacitating. Your last thoughts before you fell asleep was how the hell you were going to keep this from Alexia.

-----

Alexia wasn't really sure what was going on. You'd seemed fine when she left, concussed and tired, but fine. As the days passed, she noticed you pull away. It was a busy break, and she had meetings on top of training and games. Her little free time was spent worrying, wondering if you were mad at her. It was the only thing she could think of, because you'd been so good about telling her when you weren't feeling right.

Her worry had grown so much that her friends got tired of how distracted she was, and told her to just fly back early if she was so concerned.

She only landed a few hours earlier, in the morning, getting an uber to your guys' apartment. Alexia was sure she'd find you mad at her, about something, and was prepared to do anything to fix it. What she wasn't expecting was to find you sitting on the couch, wrapped in one of her blankets, staring at the door as she walked in as if she'd caught you cheating on her or something.

"Ale?" you wondered, "I- I was gonna get you from the airport. Later. What are you doing here?"

Something wasn't right. You weren't mad, which she would've preferred to the empty look on your face. Normally when you guys reunited, even after only a couple days apart, you greeted her with a hug, and kisses. You were sitting, frozen, on the couch though.

"I came earlier, I missed you," she said, watching carefully as she spoke. "Can I have a hug, amor?"

At that, you seemed to realize that Alexia really was here, right in front of you, and you launched yourself off the couch, around the coffee table, and into her arms.

"Oof- hola mi bebé," she said, catching you in her arms with a huff. You clung to her, desperately, and she returned the embrace, as you buried your face in her chest. She was startled to feel that you were trembling slightly in her embrace. She tightened her arms around you, pressing a kiss to your head, before pulling away, and cradling your face with her hands.

"What's wrong? You're shaking."

"Just a long week. I missed you." You replied, but you wouldn't meet her eyes.

"Okay... if you say so. I need to shower. Want to join me?" She asked, hoping to distract you from whatever was wrong. She was well versed in how to get you to talk, and distracting you until she could catch you off guard was one sure way.

Alexia watched as your face brightened slightly, and you opened your mouth to say yes. Suddenly though, a look of panic crossed your face, your mouth snapped shut, and you shook your head.

"No, I... No I don't feel like showering." You told her shakily. You winced internally, realizing you probably could have come up with a better excuse than that. You couldn't shower with her though, couldn't let her see you. See what you'd done. She'd been with you through a lot, but never this. Never with something this bad.

Alexia was looking at you, very carefully. As different explanations for why you wouldn't want to shower with her flew through her head, an explanation that covered how panicked you had been when you said no, she settled on a clear answer. One that made her heart sink, and one that explained your odd behavior the past 10 days.

You knew you were caught, the look on her face told you that she'd put it together. She softened, looking at you so gently, it made you want to collapse into her arms.

"Mi amor-" She started, but you interrupted.

"I have to go. I have an errand to run, I need to go," You said, because you couldn't deal with this. You just couldn't. You tried to head for the door, but Alexia's grip on you was strong, one hand holding your wrist, the other wrapping around your waist, pulling you into her.

"No, bebé, I need you to stay here," she cooed into your ear and you shook your head frantically.

"No, Ale, please, I need to go," you said, struggling against her, and she felt tears pooling in her eyes at the desperation with which you spoke. Alexia didn't respond, simply kissing your cheek a few times until she felt you go limp in her arms, abandoning your fight.

Alexia picked you up easily, cradling you in her arms, and made her way to your bedroom. As she walked in, she noticed that your side of the bed was untouched. On her pillow, one of her sweatshirts was crumpled there, as if you'd been holding it as you slept. She didn't understand why you hadn't called her. You'd clearly needed her, desperately, but you'd suffered in silence. She set you down on the edge of the bed, and you stared at the floor.

Kneeling in between your legs, she looked up at you. "Y/n, what happened?" She asked carefully.

"I don't know. It just got so out of control and I didn't know what else to do." You replied, still refusing to meet her eyes. She wanted to shout that you could have called her, could have asked her for help. That wouldn't do anything, though, so she just nodded.

"Come shower with me, please. Then we can just hangout until you're ready to talk," she said, and you knew there was no other option. You nodded, and she stood, tilting your chin up to press a sweet kiss to your lips. "I love you." She told you, figuring that you might need to hear it.

"I love you too." you replied, giving her a weak smile.

Alexia took your hand, and led you into the bathroom. She turned the shower on, setting it to the exact temperature you would have, and your heart clenched at the small gesture. She turned back to you, and you felt your lip start to tremble, knowing what you needed to do.

"Mi niña bonita, it's going to be okay, I promise." She said, noticing the tears in your eyes. She gently tugged your top and bra off, trailing kisses down your chest and stomach as she kneeled in front of you. There was nothing sexual about the actions, she was simply trying to bring you any comfort she could. She rested her hands on the waistband of the sweatpants you had on, looking up at you, waiting for you to be ready.

"Are you mad?" you asked, squeezing your eyes shut.

"No. I'm not mad, I could never be mad. Not for this," she promised, and you opened your eyes, looking down at her. She was looking up at you, green eyes wide with such sincerity, you nodded, giving her the go ahead.

Alexia tugged your pants and underwear down together, carefully lifting the waistband over the bandage on your thigh. She worked to keep her face neutral, which was hard. The brown bandage covered up so much of your thigh, all of your old scars were covered by it. She bit her lip, trying to withhold her emotions for now. You needed her, which she was reminded when she looked back up at you, to see you staring at the ceiling.

"Amor, can I take this off?" she asked. Now that she knew you had clearly properly cared for the cuts, she didn't need to take the bandage off, and she wouldn't make you. She wanted to see, though, see how bad it was. She had to know, if she was going to be able to help. One cut was a lot different than ten.

You looked back down at her, taking a second before answering. everything in you was telling you to say no, but hiding things hadn't been working so well. It was what got you on the bathroom floor with a razor blade yesterday, and now, with your girlfriend kneeled at your feet, thumbs rubbing gentle circles into the skin of your thigh.

"I'll do it," you told her, taking a deep breath. You reached your hands down from where they held tight to the counter, ignoring the way they shook. You tugged on the bandage, not bothering to be gentle as you peeled it off. You wouldn't look, you couldn't. You heard Alexia's intake of breath at the sight, and you felt a tear drop from your face. You felt something featherlight touch the partially healed cuts, and you looked down on instinct. Alexia was placing a light kiss on every cut, and you couldn't hold back anymore.

Letting out a sob, you cried harder than you had in a long time. "I'm sorry, Ale, I'm so sorry. I'm so fucking sorry." Alexia was up in a flash, cradling you against her as you cried. Her hands rubbed up and down your bare back as she spoke quietly in your ear.

"It's okay, you don't need to be sorry, mi amor. I love you. It's all going to be okay. Estoy aquí, no voy a ninguna. Te tengo, para siempre," she murmured.

She got you to stop crying, if only slightly, and pulled you into the shower, after taking her own clothes off. It was a blur, you knew she washed your hair, and you knew she was talking to you the whole time, but suddenly, you were sitting on the bed again, and she was carefully wrapping up your thigh.

"Feel okay?" she asked, once she'd secured the bandage on. You told her it did and she sent you a soft smile, before pulling clothes on you both. Alexia gave you your favorite sweatshirt of hers, an old Barca crewneck, and herself pulled on one of yours, a grey, ripped and faded hoodie, that she swore was the softest thing you owned.

Carefully, she brushed your hair out, tying it back in a loose braid, knowing you hated when your wet hair got your shirt all wet. She brushed through her own hair quickly, not daring to leave your side. It was silent as she did so. You were truly astounded with the level of care with which she was treating you. It made you feel like the thoughts that had been swirling around your brain for days might be wrong.

Alexia made the bed, then, knowing you preferred to lay on top of the covers with a blanket during the day, before laying down, and opening her arms for you to join her. You crawled up the bed, settling down with your back to her chest, lacing your fingers with hers, and pulling her arms to wrap around your body.

It was calming, feeling the rise and fall of your girlfriend's chest under you, feeling her chin rest lightly on the top of your head. Alexia wasn't sure what to say, where to start. She had so many questions. Luckily, it had seemed you'd found your voice, as you spoke.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you it was bad again," you rasped, throat somewhat raw from crying.

"Why didn't you?" she questioned.

"It wasn't on purpose at first. And then suddenly it was so bad and I didn't want you to know. I was worried it would be too much. I felt so guilty, like I was letting you down by not calling, but like I couldn't burden you with it."

Alexia hummed in response, thinking carefully about her next words. "Bebé, did you really think I'd be mad at you?"

"Yeah. When I get like this, I just. Convince myself that I'm not good enough for you, and I'm so scared that if I mess up, you'll leave."

"I'm not leaving. Ever. No matter what," she promised. "Can you tell me why? What were you thinking that made you do that to yourself?" You took a deep breath at her words, and you felt her arms tighten around you, just slightly.

"I felt like a bad person. I couldn't even make it 10 days without you, I was such a mess. I couldn't feel anything, but this insane guilt, all I could hear was my brain telling me that I'm not good. I just needed it to stop." It was the most you'd ever told anyone. You felt Alexia deserved an actual explanation, and you trusted her. You really did, even though sometimes it seemed like you didn't. It was you that you didn't trust as much.

"Did it work?"

"For a bit. Then all I could think was that you were going to be disappointed in me." You felt her shake her head behind you.

"Never. You are good, mi niña, you are so good. You are kind, and thoughtful, and you always make me laugh. When I get to make you smile, it's better than scoring 100 goals in Camp Nou. You are the most important thing to me."

"And it makes me chest hurt, to think of you doing this, to think that your thoughts were so bad, you didn't feel like you had another choice. You always have another choice, mi amor. You can always call me when you need me. When you feel like that, and your brain isn't being very nice to you, I will remind you every time that it's wrong." she paused.

"And I don't want you to feel like you need to hide it from me if you hurt yourself. I want to know, because I love you, and I care about you, and I want you to be safe, and happy, and healthy. I'll never be mad, mi amor. I want to help, but I can only do that if you let me, if you trust me," she finished, wishing she could see your face.

"I trust you. I promise I do, I just got so scared that it would be too much this time."

"You will never be too much for me," she responded firmly.

"I promise that if this happens again, I'll tell you. I promise," you repeated, promising yourself as well. Alexia kissed the top of your head in response. You shifted on top of her, rolling onto your stomach, resting your chin on her chest to look at her. Her thumb came up to gently wipe a tear off your face.

"Thank you. I know you said you don't mind, that you aren't mad, but you don't have to be as perfect, as patient, as you are."

"You are perfect, mi niña, you'll always be perfect. My most perfect girl," she said. You couldn't find a trace of doubt in her face. You looked up at her for a few more seconds, and she looked down at you, watching as you decided whether or not to speak.

"What is it?" she asked gently, watching as you fought back tears once again.

"It's stupid," you replied, and she raised an eyebrow at you. "I was clean for 4 years, and now I'm not. I have to go back to day 1, Ale, and I don't know how." You told her, vulnerability clear on your face.

"That's not stupid, not at all. We'll do it again, together. It'll be easier this, time because I'm not letting you do any of it alone. We'll get you to 4 years again, and 5 and 6. And if you slip up, we'll deal with that too. You aren't doing this by yourself, we'll figure it out. I promise."

"How do you always know what to say?" you asked, sniffling.

She chuckled lightly, and it was the first real smile you'd seen on her face since she'd walked through the door. "Because I know you, and I know how your brain works. I know that it's telling you, all the time, that I'm going to leave. All I need to do is promise that I'm not going anywhere, because I'm not. Being here, it's the easiest thing in the world, because you are so easy to love, so easy to be with."

Alexia tucked a stray piece of hair behind your ear, looking at you with an adoring face that you couldn't help but return. The force of her love for you tended to knock you off your feet, sometimes. You only really believed it, believed her, because you knew it was how you felt about her. You saw your love for her reflected in her eyes at you, and if anything was going to get you through this, it was the knowledge that she wanted to be here. That she loved you, no matter what. You knew she'd make you love yourself again, whatever it took.

-----

try to end one of my fics without both girls going to sleep challenge. i hope everything made sense. i feel like it's really hard to describe how i feel when i'm depressed, and i don't want to make it so specific that people will have a hard time relating. anyway, if you read this and it resonated with you at all, i hope you're doing okay. And if you're not, you will be. i promise. <3 i love you all

#woso #woso imagine #woso x reader #alexia putellas x reader #alexia putellas

[keyotos]

the only exception

summary ⎯ where blade thinks there is no more hope for love, but you may be the only exception.

tags ⎯ soft blade. mentions of blade's past. reader uses his real name (yingxing) like once on accident. emotional rollercoaster. blade goes through the 5 stages of grief except its not grief it's love. blade is bad at feelings.

tana's thoughts ⎯ gave into the voices and i starting writing this.

the xianzhou is not like it used to be, yet it has not changed that much either. at least, that's what blade noticed as he stood by one of the railings at starskiff haven. he watched the starskiffs come and go as he stood there, motionless.

he had a cup of tea from the tea parlor nearby. some customers wanted him to engage in tea discourse with them because he was an "outworlder," but with one glare from him, they knew better than to press on. so now, he was alone in the dark with sunglasses on.

starskiffs seemed to improve throughout the years. his favorite snack stand was gone, one he used to visit with you. blade tried to ignore the burning sensation in the middle of his chest at the thought. but the stupid mungbean soda vending machines were still there. damn them, he thought.

blade took off his sunglasses momentarily as he rubbed his eyes. sunglasses were obviously meant to be worn in the sun, not in the dark: they were causing him eye strain. he tried to be as subtle as possible, not trying to attract any cloud knights or realm-keeping employees. his face was still on a wanted poster, after all.

"ahem."

blade turned back to find a cloud knight with a mung bean soda in their hand. his mind instantly turned to you, given that you were also a cloud knight who loved mung bean soda (unless that changed as well), but he snapped back to the current situation. he was about to be arrested. the cloud knight cornered him, spear in hand as they slightly lifted up their helmet to take a sip out of their drink.

have cloud knights gotten sloppier? why are they drinking soda when they were about to arrest someone? blade furrowed his eyebrows, but still got into a defensive position.

he was about to swing at the cloud knight until they held their hands up in surrender, "woah, dude," they slowly said, raising their hands up, "i'm not gonna arrest you," they placed their mung bean soda on the railing, and removed their hat.

and it was you. he was just thinking about you, and you appeared. the sight felt surreal. you, who he had been so close with all those years ago. you, who became his first friend on the luofu. you, who still lingered in his mind after all these years, who he thought about even when the mara was affecting him.

you've changed. though you haven't exactly aged, you look older. you look exhausted; your face didn't glow as it used to. blade thinks he is partial to blame for that. your posture is profoundly straight and no longer slouched⎯something you used to struggle with.

the wind blows through your hair, scattering some leaves around with it. your expression is neutral as you throw all your armor on the ground and dust yourself off. there is no smile adorning your face. everything feels so identical, but so different.

his stance softened, but he didn't let up. when you saw that, you only sighed in response. after kicking some stray pieces of armor to the side, you lean your back on the rail as you sipped your soda. the sound of the armor colliding together on the floor made blade cringe.

"i don't actually wear armor, by the way," you swung the drink in his vicinity, offering him a sip using a hand gesture. when he didn't respond, you took another swig. "i have my own uniform. pretty cool, isn't it?" you tilt your head down towards your outfit.

blade doesn't understand. why were you speaking to him as if you two were still friends? could you recognize him under the glasses? it has been so long, he'd be surprised if you recognized him at all.

blade tries to maintain his cover. he is silent while you raise an eyebrow inquisitively, wondering why this stranger wasn't responding to you. you're waiting for him to speak, blade notices. he doesn't say anything. you tilt your head to the side, and blade tilts his head the other way.

you sigh, "you know, not many people are out here so late," you sip out of your soda can, looking at blade while he looks at the starskiffs. you continue, "an old friend of mine used to do this. we'd go out every night and create elaborate stories about strangers, and then stare at starskiffs."

you're telling blade about himself. or, his past self anyway. there's a present ache in his heart, hearing how you speak about him. blade feels like an imposter, standing here with sunglasses on while you talk about him. you sound melancholic, like you miss him. a stupid thing for you, blade thought.

"he's gone now," you turned and leaned forward, now watching the starskiffs with blade. he gets a sense of deja vu, and the feeling sends chills all over his body. you rest your head on your arms on the rail, "i miss him though. he was a little awkward, but he was kind."

"and sometimes," you turn your head towards blade, "he was a little annoying. like he would keep hating on my soda," you hold your soda up to blade, but all he could think about was how you just called him annoying, "or he'd force me to go to bed early. coddle me. nag at me to do my laundry⎯that was very annoying. like, hello? i'm an adult, i could totally do my own laundry," you ranted as you watched the starskiffs.

"maybe you should've done your laundry earlier," he mumbled to himself. he made sure it was low enough that only he would be able to hear it. if you noticed, you didn't say anything; you were still focused on the starskiffs passing by.

blade takes the time to look at you. to study you. it felt like everything about you was so different, but you were still the same. you still chatted about anything to strangers (something he always chided you about). you still drank mung bean soda. you didn't have that growth spurt you dreamed about.

but you were quieter. ironic, because you just jabbered about the annoyances blade had caused you years ago. but you didn't give out too many details. you didn't mouth off about what tea parlor was best, or recent gossip from earlier. you kept things to yourself. blade doesn't know if he should be happy or not.

something was off. there was a wall between you now. and it felt so wrong. blade knows he isn't entitled to anything⎯not anymore, at least. but the feeling of disconnect between two people who were once rooted together physically pained him. even with everything that has happened, he did not want to see you like this.

"i hope he visits soon," you look at him with eyes that glitter among the stars. you're still hopeful; that has not changed. you speak like the sun is shining in your body, and your words are laced with warmth that eases enough for blade to let his guard down. that's when he realized that you're still glowing, and you never stopped.

but your words also bring a stabbing pain into his heart. why are you still longing for him? you should have moved on. you should have found someone better for you. someone who will not harm you at any given moment. but here you are, missing him. hoping he comes back.

"seriously? i just told you that i missed you and hoped you came back, and you say nothing??" you grimaced, looking exasperated. there's a slight crack in the wall now, but blade doesn't notice.

he had other things to concentrate on. like what you just said.

blade did not find this very amusing. his eyes widened underneath his sunglasses and he took a few steps back. after all these years, you could still find him in a crowd full of people. it was love he did not deserve, yet still begrudgingly craved.

"how did you know it was me?" was all blade could utter. he was too alarmed to ask any other questions, or press on your story. or to ask more about you.

you glower and huff, "so he does speak," you cross your arms over the railing as you turn to make eye contact with your past ally.

"how did you know?" blade snarled. he didn't intend for his words to come out as harsh as they did, and the moment they left his mouth, he wanted to shove the words back in and eat them. he had forgotten how you made him feel like an idiot sometimes just by doing absolutely nothing.

your eyes widen and your eyebrows slightly jump up; blade wishes he could erase that expression from his head permanently. however, instead of reacting to it, your composure remains calm. it unsettles blade; he has never seen you so calm before. when you two were young, you got into arguments with those who barely picked a fight with you. you were straightforward and aggressive: blade shouldn't have admired that about you, but nevertheless, he did.

you're less temperamental, and blade doesn't know if he likes it or not. he was worried. after a lifetime of emptiness and recklessness, blade worries. he worries about you: your life, your job, your wellbeing. he worries if you got promoted or not, or if you're living happily.

do you have a partner? blade tries to ignore the flames surrounding his heart as he thinks about your love life.

"oh please. after all the years we've spent together, you'd think i wouldn't be able to spot you in a crowd?" you let out a dry and curt laugh, "just because your hair got darker and you changed your outfit, does not mean you are unrecognizable."

"not to me, anyway," you quietly add, turning your gaze away from him and back to the starskiffs. there's an overwhelming feeling that was welling up in blade's body. it wasn't mara, because it felt more peaceful. but the urge was still strong. he wanted to grab your chin and turn you back towards him; he wanted you to look at him again and explain. to tell him about everything. he doesn't care about the topic, but he will listen no matter what.

blade feels foolish. how could one conversation (if you could even call this a conversation) make him feel so lovestruck? every single feeling for you⎯that he thought he had discarded a long time ago⎯reappeared out of thin air. it all came rushing back at him: your personality, your terrible jokes, and every single thing he grew to love about you. blade tried so hard to dismiss those feelings in the past century, and in the midst of a few minutes, all his past work crumbled.

when blade doesn't say anything, you take a sip out of your drink. the silence is tense; it is opposed to the once comfortable silences you two shared while watching starskiffs. blade thinks that, in another life, nothing would have changed: he would not have become mara-struck, and you two would watch starskiffs fly for hours on end.

but everything has changed now. and there's no going back to fix it. blade will shove down every morsel of affection he feels for you again. and this time, they won't come back up. starting tonight.

you give him a small smile, "so, wanna tell me what you've been up to?"

he will shove down every morsel of affection. starting tomorrow night. another crack in the wall between the both of you.

the feeling of wanting to capture someone's smile is maddening. you drive him crazy, and you make him more insane than mara ever could. all of this because of one smile? blade pictures your small smile once again. it's incomparable to your true smile, though. one where you're showing all your teeth and your eyes crinkle with such bemusement it drives him amuck.

once he pictures your toothy smile, he sinks deeper into the talons of endearment.

"aren't you supposed to arrest me?" he deflects, trying to stem away from his previous lovesick thoughts. maybe, if you arrest him now, he could flee from the luofu forever. maybe then, he'd have a reason to avoid you for life.

you make a 'pfft' noise with your mouth, and the sound is familiar and stupid. it has no reason to make his heart flutter the way it just did.

"if i wanted to arrest you, then you'd be in the hall of karma ages ago," you boast, "luckily for you though, i'm on a break."

"didn't know cloud knights slacked off now," blade rolls his eyes under his sunglasses. he thinks that if he's rude enough towards you, then you'd get the message that he's changed, and you would leave. he's not the same person he was before. if he didn't deserve you back then, he most definitely did not deserve you now.

"well, i'm not a cloud knight anymore," you step closer to him, "i'm a lieutenant."

so you got promoted. blade deeply tries to ignore how his breaths get more shallow after the mention of your promotion.

instead of congratulating you, blade instead replies with, "so you're the same rank as that kid that follows the general around?"

your face falls, and dread swarms throughout his body, spreading through every vein and artery and organ. every regret blade has does not compare with whatever he just said. blade finds that, whenever he thinks about regret, your face has always remained through his sea of remorse. you are the one thing he regrets in many different ways.

blade regrets meeting you. he regrets indulging in your offers for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. he regrets spending his nights with you. he regrets every time his heart leapt multiple beats whenever you were near. he regrets letting his guard down around you, because even now⎯whenever he is with you⎯he feels incredibly relaxed, despite not having to see you in centuries.

he regrets you. he regrets not being able to say goodbye to you. he regrets leaving you with so many qualms. he regrets not being able to see you change. he regrets the fact that he never got to confess to you. he regrets the fact that he still loves you, because why else would he be feeling this way?

the idiot keeps his mouth shut, even though he wants to apologize. "i didn't mean it," he wanted to say, "i'm sure you are very capable now. you stand up more straighter and you look more put together. not that you didn't look put together before. well, actually you didn't, but that's not the point."

it occured to blade that he was rambling about you in his mind. he was describing you in his mind. he was going crazy. nobody else notices these things about you. but blade physically could not tear his eyes away from you. the more he stared, the more he noticed more: such as the way your shoulders were more upright, your breathing was slow and even, and you surprisingly didn't look like you wanted to kill him. the you from centuries ago would have thrown him off the ledge.

you sigh, pressing your fingers to the bridge of your nose, "i see you've met yanqing."

blade says nothing, which simply prompts you to keep talking. a tiny slither of comfort enter's blade's body: it was refreshing to see that after years, some things will never change.

"he's jing yuan's retainer," blade internally (and bitterly) revels in the fact that you don't use any formalities with jing yuan anymore, "he can be a bit... much. but it makes sense. he's only a kid, you know? i like him," you move your soda can to the side to make room for your arms. you're leaning on the railing again, and you were not looking at blade anymore. it should not scatter uneasiness around his nerves.

he wants to share an anecdote of his own. blade yearns for connection with you for just once more. when he is around you, there's an ache in his heart. it was always there; past and present. he thought it would be subtle, like a symptom of a short-term illness. but soon he realized, the symptom he shrugged off was a manifestation of something bigger. and blade never truly recognized how long his sickness would last. because here he is right now, sick as a dog in your presence.

if wanting to fuel your everlasting fire was a sickness, blade decided that he would be diagnosed as terminal.

blade tsks at your statement. you are not impressed; your face looking slack and skeptical. there have been many times where he has been on the receiving end of that look, yet he feels the air swirl all around in his stomach every time you look at him that way. he also tries to slow his heart rate down: there should be no reason why he should be elated at the fact that you're looking at him.

"don't give me that," you cross your arms, "he reminds me of you," you pause, letting the silence overtake the both of you. there are so many unsaid things that the silence feels full, yet still too quiet. you know that the past is a sensitive topic for blade (and you as well, but you choose to dwell on that another night).

"back when we were kids, anyway," you quickly add on.

blade scoffs. scoffs. he does not see himself in yanqing, and he also does not know how you came up to that conclusion. it was ridiculous and strange. blade had to fight a scowl off his face: yanqing and him were nothing alike. if anything, the child was the spitting image of the general.

at least time hasn't changed your terrible analogies.

"terrible?" you point a finger at him, nearing his sunglasses. oh. he said that out loud. "i'll have you know, my analogies are great!"

"you compared me to yanqing, who resembles jing yuan the most," blade shifts his head to the side as he crosses his arms. your finger made his glasses shift down slightly. he could see you a lot better now without the dark obstructing his view, and he internally curses at the wanted posters for being the (indirect) reason he has to wear the glasses.

you let out a sound of disbelief, which resembled blade's scoff and your huff from earlier, "first of all, i was describing temperament. second, terrible?!?"

"if you were describing temperament, then that child would be your twin," he says, trying to fight off the feeling of his lips turning up. this feels familiar. it feels homely, almost. the world melts away when he is around you. every person, place, worry: disintegrated away by your warmth. did you know that? how do you do that? how do you make all the problems in the world disappear so easily?

you let out a breathy laugh, turning away from blade one more time. except, this time, you turn back, a grin evident on your face. it's dark in starskiff haven at the moment, but blade is sure that he just saw the sun in your smile. out of his peripheral vision, he looks to see if anyone else has noticed. have they noticed the light coming from you? how do they notice notice it?

the world continues to move, but with you, it seems that everything is perfectly still.

"i'll have you know, i worked on that whole temperament thing," you held up a hand to his face, "i'm chill now."

"oh really?" blade skeptically raises an eyebrow. you can see it through the crack in his facade left by the sunglasses. you can see his eyes a little bit more clearer.

"oh yeah," you drag out, taking a long sip of your soda. you turn on your back and spread your arms across the railings, mimicking a tired soldier, "i'm chill."

and this feels so normal, like if it was a typical night on the luofu. you and him spending time together once again. everything fell back into place so easily, as if the events of all those years ago never happened. why was it so easy?

various emotions coarse through his body, each feeling worse than the last. he can't stay. he can't live. he knows that the longer he stays here with you, the harder leaving you gets. but things have changed, even if you have not. you probably couldn't even love him the same either, logistically speaking. there were too many obstacles standing between the both of you: loving him was impossible.

he still does not understand why you still speak to him.

greeted by his silence, you choose to continue the conversation further, "this soda really helped," you slide the drink over to him again, "it's been a few years. you should try it again."

"a few years, huh?" blade eyes the drink. biggest understatement of the year.

"yeah," you eye him. your eyes are telling him to say something. blade, in all of his fearlessness, is scared. he has not been scared in a long time. the feelings of fear rushing back into him leave him stranded to his own devices, and he has no clue how to react. he used to turn to you for these things, but now, you are the reason for his fear.

you step closer to him. you are close enough that your shoulders are now touching. when you speak, blade tries to control the agitation growing in the pit of his stomach. destructive thoughts impede and pervase through his mind.

"they hate you."

"things will never be the same."

"whatever you had once, it has all gone down the drain now."

"please try the mung bean soda."

what?

blade snapped out of his head to see you holding up your drink right next to his face. he leaned his head backwards as he was met with your pleading eyes.

you took him out of his trance like it was nothing. you didn't have abilities like kafka did, yet you were able to take him out of his spiral using only six words. how was it that everything surrounding you became so easy?

"i'm not drinking that," blade says with a stern voice. he hopes that his glasses hide the panic that was once apparent in his eyes.

"c'mon," you begged, "just one sip⎯"

"why are you even doing this?" blade irritatedly snapped.

you raise an eyebrow and pretend to not know what he was talking about, "because i want you to try new things...?"

"you know what i mean."

you set down the soda can again and let out a long sigh. you run your hands through your hair, and blade thinks this is it. this is the moment where you snap back like you usually would. this is the part where you tell him that he should leave. he's too difficult, too hard to love.

"did you think i was lying back when i said i missed you?" your entire face softened. there was no light-heartened smirk or grin. you look sad. there are no other words to describe how else you look except sad. blade could not think of any other words. all he could focus on was you.

"i wasn't lying," you say, sounding more desperate than before, "i miss you so much, yin⎯blade." your tone turns sharp when you say his name now. this is it, blade tells himself, this is the part where you leave.

"you matter to me," you eunicate, "i still believe in you. i don't care about the past; i'm not letting it hold me back. which, i know is probably wrong on some level, but i don't care. because i miss you a lot."

"it's not even the fact that i miss us from before," you're rambling now. blade does not have the heart to stop you, "but i just miss you. blade or yingxing, i couldn't care less. i miss our late night talks, so when i saw you here tonight, i jumped at the opportunity to talk to you," you threw your hands up in the air, and then ran another hand through your hair, "and when we spoke⎯even with everything that happened⎯everything felt so easy while talking to you. and everything was okay. and i just wanted that so badly," your voice trailed off. blade swore he could hear it crack a little.

you had felt the same way he did. blade does not know if he was just consumed by an overwhelming sense of air flowing through his chest, or feeling something drop in his chest after you said what you said.

"sorry," you had nothing to apologize for, "i just word-dumped on you," you were using another one of your weird terms again, "i just wanted to let you know that i've always missed you. i've missed everything about you. and i don't want to let you go."

i still love you.

you don't say that. you finish your tangent with a long sigh and another swig of your soda can. it's almost empty. mentally, you feel like that soda can right now. you just dumped years worth of feelings on blade, and he responds with silence.

this is it, you think, this is where he leaves.

but he doesn't. he brings you closer. blade grabs your wrist before you can put the drink back down, and he brings the can to his lips. he faces the fact that he just put his lips where yours were. for a brief second, he imagines that he was pressing his lips onto yours⎯not the soda can.

blade takes back everything he said earlier. he does not regret you whatsoever. he yearns for you. he needs you to function. he wants you: all the time.

he does not regret meeting you. he is not a believer of gods, but he wants to praise whichever higher power that allowed your fate to intertwine with his. he does not regret spending every moment of his time with you; those have been some of the happiest memories in his life.

most of all, he does not regret loving you, because who would regret the warmth of an everlasting flame?

love has been something blade has lived without for many years. but it all comes back so effortlessly with you. and now he realizes why: he loves you like air fans flames. he will keep on giving into your love, so long as you are still there. it doesn't matter when or where: it just matters if you are there.

"i thought you didn't like mung bean soda," you look at his ear rather than his face, not ready for rejection.

"you wanted me to try something new, didn't you?" blade only looked at you, wrist still in hand. he ponders how he was ever scared of your love.

“i didn’t think you would try it so soon,” you pathetically laughed.

“sooner than you’d think,” he quietly mumbled, only so the two of you could hear it. his fingers were grasping the top of your hands as he still held onto your wrist.

“look,” you place the drink down, slinking your hand out of blade’s hold, “i know you’re probably going to be gone soon. that’s fine. couldn’t really expect you to stay because of your… you know. job,” you awkwardly explain, tucking your hands behind your back.

“but,” you sounded more optimistic, and it seemed as though the street lights all lit up, “you know that friend i was telling you about? the annoying one?” blade rolls his eyes, you only laugh at his reaction, “i hope that he visits more often.”

hope. you hope for him to come back. you hope for more. blade hopes for more too. he wants more, actually. craves it.

but he plays hard to get, “well, if you keep calling your friend ‘annoying’ i doubt he’ll visit as often as you’d like,” and he smirks. you have to bite your lip, hard, to restrain your giddy smile.

“well, i was just telling it as it is,” and it’s easy again. and you want this as much as blade does. and this is hope. this is hope that, even after everything, you’re still here and love is still alive. the wall is broken so easily.

“mhm, okay.”

“yup!”

“i’ll see if i can sort something out,” blade tells you, taking another drink of your soda. he’s emptied at this point. he’s only taking the “drink” so he could try to hide his (growing) blush from you.

“i thought you ‘weren’t going to visit’ as often,” you pouted, rolling your eyes.

“well, i never said that. i said your friend was going to do that. just giving you some advice, that’s all,” he teased. you felt your heart swell up: everything was going to be fine.

“your advice is shit.”

“you’re shit.”

yeah. everything will be okay.

if this looks familiar it’s bc this is an expanded ver of the xianzhou men hcs i did like a week ago. this was from blades part and i liked it sm i wrote more. wish i could have done the end a little bit more justice but i am TIREDDDD it was 4:30 in the morning.

but if u made it all the way down here i hope u enjoyed!! i put my tanussy in this and i wrote for like 5 hrs so pls enjoy LMAO

#tana writes (∗´ ᨔ `∗) #honkai star rail #honkai star rail x reader #hsr #hsr x reader #blade x reader #blade x you #blade x y/n #this was supposed to be longer but it’s 4:30 in the morning and i’m done #like my brain is fried and i cant do this anymore 😭 #the ending was rushed asl but yk other than that i didn’t hate this

[justporo]

Astarion owns property in my head at this point. Can I request for Astarion and Tav where they finally settle down after everything with the Absolute is over and has finally calmed down, and Tav immediately gets extremely sick. Nothing deadly, but still severe. After all the stress from the tadpoles and fighting for their lives, Tav's body kinda just gives out. I'd imagine Astarion would be at a complete loss at taking care of someone, let alone someone that sick lol probably gets scared they're dying too

Oh, Anon, I feel you. It's not that he lives in my head rentfree, no! He owns the building and makes ME pay the rent by now...

This request resonates a lot with me, today, because I'm frankly barely holding on atm, my stomach's acting up and I can't wait for the finishline for this week... so I too could actually use some Astarion taking care of me - although if that might help? Let's see! (Spoilers ahead)

This is pure ridiculous fluff btw. And thank you for the sweet request!

Pairing: Astarion / GN!Tav (You) Wordcount: 1,5k

Strawberry Sugar High

You hadn't left the bed for the better part of a week and you felt you had contracted most every kind of ailment that one could suffer from under this sun. You felt shaky and dizzy. Your limbs hurt and felt weak. Your stomach was in a weird limbo of feeling strange and barely allowing you to keep anything down. Radiating heatwaves making your whole body sweat came and switched places with icy chills so even the coziest of blankets couldn't stop you from shivering. You were down bad - and Astarion almost scaled the walls not knowing what to do with you or how to take care of you.

"My sweet, I brought you...", Astarion started to announce cheerfully as he opened the door to your bedroom with a bowl and a steaming mug in his hands. Then he saw how you had hogged every possible piece of fabric in your giant joint bed and had wrapped yourself in it. At the sight of it, Astarion's shoulders slumped visibly and with it his procured goods - which almost caused scorching hot tea to splash on the floor.

“…some fruit and tea”, he finished audibly distraught and walked over to sit somewhat next to where you had rolled up into a mess of sheets and blankets and were silently shivering. He carefully placed down mug and bowl on the nightstand before he turned to the pile that you had become.

“I really thought you were getting better, my love!” The sad and suffering puppy eyes he made at you almost made you think he was the one to be worried about.

“Y-you say t-that every-ytime you le-leave the room and co-ome back, A-Astarion”, you replied through shattering teeth which sadly took the edge off of your snide remark.

“I know, love. Because every time I hope you might would have started to feel better. But you’ve been like this for almost a week and yet no improvement in sight. You have me worried sick!”, he dramatically explained.

The shivers temporarily left your body to allow you to give Astarion a death stare – the audacity of this man. “I am so terribly sorry that I dare put you through th-this. Now please h-hand me the t-tea!”, you sarcastically replied and worked your hands out of the mountain of blankets to stretch them out towards the nightstand where the vampire had placed the mug.

Astarion handed you the mug. “Careful, it’s scorching ho…”, he said while you grabbed it from him and placed your palms around the hot ceramic and sighed at the bliss of warmth.

Astarion stared at you as if you had turned into an ox.

You took in the smell of the fresh brew and sighed again – pine needles, mint, chamomile, and a hint of lavender. You took a sip slowly because it was actually really hot and closed your eyes for a second. The hot drink temporarily made you feel better.

“You really got the right mixture down now, Astarion, thank you!”, you said as you opened your eyes again and smiled broadly at the vampire who had swung his legs onto the bed and crossed them by the ankles – bare feet sticking out of the pant legs – to sit beside you. At your compliment his face lit up, his eyes filling with sincere joy.

“Well, I’m happy to hear I am proficient at taking care of you, my sweet sick darling”, he said and raised one of his eyebrows in arrogant manner. “Well, let’s not forget the time when you didn’t strain the pine needles or when you tried to make mushroom soup and created bile”, you replied to his cocky demeanour and then took another sip of tea. The shivers were really calming down now.

Astarion’s mouth became a straight line. “Well, I am sorry, but it’s been over two hundred years since I last had to know my way around a kitchen – you’d be surprised how easily forgotten mundane things are”, he pouted but stretched out his arm to rub circles on your back – or what he thought must be your back under the thick padding of fabric.

You were fairly certain, Astarion had never really known his way around a kitchen, but you really didn’t want to rub it in since he was actually trying so hard to take care of you. And he had really been worried sick about you since it seemed he had also forgotten how much impact even a rather harmless sickness could have on a mortal body.

“Feeling better now?”, Astarion asked while he kept rubbing your back. This time there wasn’t a hint of sarcasm or arrogance in his tone, just a sincere, caring question.

“I am. Thank you, my heart”, you answered and turned a bit to him to give him another smile. “I guess after everything that happened my body was just in dire need of a break – and now forced me to take it. I guess in a few days I’ll be merrily dallying around again”, you spoke as you looked at Astarion but then spied past him to where you had seen something of interest in the bowl he had brought.

“I’m happy to hear that, my sweet, because I don’t know…”, the vampire replied with a smile then furrowed his brows as he saw your focus shift past him and you leaned to look behind him. He made to lean with you. “My beautiful eyes are up here, my love”, he murmured playfully.

But you craned your neck now to see what it was he had brought you – broad shoulders and handsome face be damned. “Gods, are those strawberries?” “Indeed, sweetheart.”

Your mouth opened and you stared at Astarion in anticipation: “Where did you get them? Those are not in season for a few more months! I love strawberries, they’re my favourite fruit, no, food!” Your eyes gleamed at the vampire who replied with a smug grin: “I know, darling. I am actually a good listener in case you hadn’t noticed yet.”

You stretched to give him a kiss which almost resulted in you falling over and spilling all of the remaining tea. Your heart filled with an incredible amount of joy – not only because there were strawberries to be had, but because you felt so seen by your soulmate. You smiled at Astarion. “Indeed, you are”, you happily cheered him. He smiled back just as warmly.

“I got them from a place where they magically empower the crops. It did almost cost me an arm and the rest of my dignity though, but here we are”, he explained jokingly to which you raised an inquisitive eyebrow at him.

“Feed me!”, you then demanded excitedly when he didn’t spill any more details. To which the vampire grinned even more broadly, showing his sharp fangs in the process. “Oh love, I am more than happy to indulge you in this pleasant reversal of roles”, he crooned and turned around to grab the bowl of fruit while you kept sipping on your herbal tea.

He grabbed one of the deep red fruits and slowly lifted it to your already excitedly opened mouth. You were almost salivating, as Astarion offered you the berry, holding it elegantly in his long, slender fingers. The fruit almost touched your lips, but then, at the last possible moment: the vampire flicked it in his own mouth with his thumb.

Your mouth stayed open but now in a desperate expression while Astarion chewed. His facial expression became confused then pleasantly surprised, not even looking at you for a moment. “Oh dear, these are actually rather good. I had almost also forgotten how good these taste. I haven’t eaten a strawberry in forever.” He gave a quick high-pitched laugh while still looking a bit confused. This certainly had awoken a memory he had probably thought lost forever. But still – weren’t these for you?

“Excuse me, my tragic darling vampire, I really love you rediscovering your love for these mortal pleasures known as fruit, but weren’t these meant to soothe my sufferings?”, you said and pouted at Astarion. He readily replied by finally offering you one – for real this time, while he smirked at you and stole another one for himself.

As you bit down the taste just about exploded in your mouth. They were perfectly delicious and sweet. You sighed blissfully and let your head fall back with closed eyes. You were definitely feeling better by the minute.

“So good! Thank you so much for getting them – I feel so much better already!”, you said to Astarion and shimmied over to him to first lean past him and put the mug on the nightstand and then hugging him – arms extending from your ball of blankets.

Astarion pressed a kiss to the crown of your head. “You’re welcome, my love. Now – share the rest?” “Only if you promise to get more tomorrow!”

The pale elf threw his head back and laughed. “If that is what it takes to nurse you back to health, I am more than happy to oblige, sweetheart”, he promised with a chuckle before he gave you another of the sweet berries and then popped another strawberry in his own mouth.

Author's note: Okay cool, where do I get strawberries now? Hope you enjoyed!

#astarion #astarion x tav #baldurs gate #baldurs gate 3 #baldur's gate 3 #baldur's gate iii #astarion x reader #astarion x mc #baldurs gate astarion #astarion x oc #astarion x you #fanfic #fanfiction #astarion ancunin #bg3 spoilers #strawberries #drabble #one shot #request

[rayven81194]

WOOO RANDOM DEATH FAMILY HEADCANONS

Lmao sorry pissa and death family nation for being somewhat inactive, take these headcanons that probably don’t align with canon as compensation

THIS IS ABOUT THE CHARACTERS NOT CONTENT CREATORS BTW

Not a single person in the Death Family is warm to touch and can often be cold before bed, their houses and nests are always somehow really warm and blanket full

Missa and Phil built a small shelf in the kitchen in the house at old spawn, Missa and Chayanne have filled it with cookbooks

Tallulah knows how to make perfume and because Missa has been away for a while, Tallulah has been making perfumes for him for when he gets back

Adding onto the last one, there have been lots of ‘failed attempts’, ie Tallulah was being nit picky with the scents and trying to figure out exactly what he likes

Missa will like anything and everything given to him, so long as it’s made with love

Phil, on the other hand, will like everything and anything given to him even if it’s given with hate, because he assumes the other has a connection to it (assumes they might just like things like he does)

When Missa first left on the old spawn Phil used to make small dinners for him that wouldn’t go bad for a while just in case Missa came back when he came back

Overtime, they would get more complex and put in the fridge with a note left for him

Every single meal, regardless of what it is, will have toast cut in the shape of Phil’s had with avocado making the green stripes, and another toast cut like a skull with blueberries for the details

Chayanne used to stress bake when his parents were gone, and that improved his skills in cooking really quickly

Tallulah walks extremely quietly, Chayanne picked this up and it scares Phil every time

Despite his parents vibes and all that, Chayanne refuses to wear black sweaters specifically, shirts are on thin ice and black k shorts or pants are a coin flip, this is because he doesn’t like flour showing on them when he doesn’t want to use an apron

Tallulah used to pick at her nails when nervous, but started picking at flowers instead and now her nails hurt if she scratches you

It doesn’t matter who you are, if you become apart of the Death Family, the first thing you’re taught is how to paint your nails

When Phil doesn’t have a bookmark with him and when his wings had healed enough, he would pluck a feather out and use it as a bookmark

Either Phil or Missa doggy ears pages in a book and genuinely can’t tell who, I just think one of them does even if they have a bookmark available

There are a shit ton of keychains on Phil’s bag, you give him one, it could be of anything (besides anything fed related), it’s going on that bag

Phil sometimes wishes he could proper speak bird, I guess, this is only so he could also flirt with and compliment Missa in another language like he does

Chayanne has crocs

When Tallulah cut her hair, she asked for a photo of Missa and mimicked his hairstyle

Whenever Missa is awake/goes to sleep with Phil, the eggs silently rejoice because those two hug each other extremely closely when they sleep

Despite Missa being gone for the longest time, when Phil didn’t come back on Mexican Independence Day, he developed a fear of him leaving him, like physically being far away when he didn’t know where he is and if he was okay, he understands now what Phil feels when he’s gone

Missa, because he’s the tallest between a bird man and children, will pick them up and spin them, even if only for a bit lmao he’s not strong

Adding onto that one, whenever Phil is too excited or stress or just overwhelmed with any emotions, Missa spins him around to help and it works for some reason

Phil started to spin himself in circles when overwhelmed and when Missa was gone

After the birdhouse and when Phil was physically alone, he used to sit by a crafting table with rocks and ores and make little figures of Chayanne, Tallulah and Missa, they weren’t the best and didn’t the proportions weren’t amazing, but he spent weeks on each one and added little faces with a marker

He left the Chayanne and Tallulah statues on their respective beds, with Missa beside the flower pot, hoping they would be replaced with the real people when he woke up

They never were, but Phil put them in the window upstairs once the eggs were back

When the eggs first went missing, Phil took out some cookbooks, and every single meal that looked frequently used/visited was made, and always left out for Missa

If they weren’t eaten, Phil would eat half of it for his dinner the next day, the other half in a fridge

He actually made Missa a fridge to put all these meal in and painted it to suit his vibes

The trash cans used to always filled with sticky notes because everyday, Phil would write ‘Dinner for you’ with a silly little doodle on it for Missa if he returned while sleeping

Tallulah writes in cursive

When Missa was gone, Phil used to write his name like Misƨa (second s is backwards) and make the tops each s look like half a heart, so it made a heart in his name

Missa picked up on this and always wrote Philza instead of Phil so he could put a heart with the z and a

Im bad at explaining so this is what I mean by their names:

#if u can’t read my horrid writing #the bottom part says #“yes they do the heats in the i’s” #this was a lot longer than I thought it would be #and like half of theses I thought of while eepy lmao #anyways take this offering pissa nation #qsmp #qsmp philza #q!philza #qsmp missa #q!missa #pissa #pissa nation #q!pissa #qsmp death duo #death duo #q!death duo #(just cus these can be taken platonically lmao) #qsmp death family #death family #qsmp chayanne #chayanne #chayanne the egg #tallulah #qsmp tallulah #tallulah the egg #qsmp headcanons #if u see spelling errors #no u don’t #shhh

[hellcat8908]

Love Me For Me Cassian x Female Reader

Warnings: Language, Angst, Minor Injury

You had been avoiding Cassian ever since the mating bond snapped a few weeks ago. It was clear that it had only snapped for you, though. You had tried to avoid him by volunteering for extra missions and training with Azriel instead. You were training on the balance beam Azriel had helped you build, wanting to improve your balance during combat. Azriel stood watching and offering corrections while you practiced jumping and lunging strikes. You were feeling more confident in your body and had noticed a difference overall since you started using the beam. You seemed more agile, and your strength seemed to improve.

As you were practicing a jump, Cassian came storming over, "What do you think you're doing?!" He shouted, distracting you and causing you to twist your ankle as you tried to land. The twisting of your ankle threw off your balance and sent you crashing to the ground. Azriel and Cassian were quick to get to your side. "Are you okay y/n?" Azriel asks as Cassian calls for Rhys to get Madja and bring her to the house of wind. Your eyes looked dazed as you tried to focus on Azriel. "I-I'm ok, just sore." You say trying to get up but feeling dizzy. "Stay there, Madja will be here soon." Cassian says. You ignore him, "I'm fine. You're making a big deal about nothing."

In a matter of moments, Rhys and Madja arrive. Madja instantly starts to examine you as she asks what happened. "She hurt her ankle and fell off the balance beam." Cassian says. "Tell her why she fell off the balance beam." Azriel says, annoyed. "You do realize I can speak for myself, right?" You say annoyed at both of them. "Y/n, tell us what happened, please." Rhys says, trying to ease the tension. "I was training on the balance beam when Cassian came out of nowhere and yelled, "What do you think you're doing?! Which caused me to become distracted, and I twisted my ankle, causing me to fall." You answer.

"Well, your ankle is more than twisted. I'm afraid it's broken." Madja says. "Great, so now I'm out a couple of days, thanks, Cassian!" You say angrily. "Well, if you hadn't been avoiding me, this wouldn't have happened!" Cassian says. "Or you could've not yelled at me. That's an option." You say. "Both of you stop!" Rhys says, getting tired of your bickering. Madja sets your ankle and tells you to take it easy for a couple of days to let it fully heal. "Come on, I'll help you inside." Azriel says. "No, I will. We still have things to discuss." Cassian says as he picks you up. "I don't need to be carried." You grumble, secretly loving being in his arms. "Shut up and let me take care of you." He says arrogantly.

He easily carries you into the house and to your room. He gently lays you on the bed before grabbing some pillows and elevating your ankle. He makes sure you're comfortable before he pulls up a chair and sits beside your bed, "Now will you tell me why you're avoiding me?" You fidget with your nails, "I'm not avoiding you, I've been busy." You say. "Come on, you and I both know you're avoiding me, and I want to know what I did to make you." He says. "Nothing, Cass," you say as you lay back and stare at the ceiling. His fingers gently draw your gaze to him, "Clearly I did something because you'll barely look at me." "Cass, please." You say barely above a whisper.

"Was I that mean to you and didn't even realize it?" He says, sounding hurt. "I can't, Cassian. I can't handle the thought of you only being with me because something says you should. I can't handle not being good enough for you to love me on my own. I can't handle knowing you'll never look at me the way you look at Nesta. Everything you say and do will be tainted, and I can't handle it." You admit as tears pool in your eyes. "You're my mate?" He says, realizing what you're saying. "Please leave," you say as you turn away from him, "I want to be alone."

Cassian sits in shock as he feels the bond snap, tying him to you. He reluctantly gets up and leaves your room. You silently cry as you lay facing the wall. To most finding your mate was everything, but to you, it was a curse. You hated the idea of fate deciding who you should be with. You had nothing against Cassian. You did love him. You'd grown to love him over the years. To watch him pining over Nesta had brought you back to reality. You realized he would never be yours, and you accepted it. Seems like fate had other plans, though. You didn't want his love because the bond compelled him to love you. You wanted him to love you on his own free will. Eventually, you cried yourself to sleep.

The next day, you refused to see anyone. The house is keeping your door firmly locked for you. Occasionally, a fresh glass of water and some fruit or yogurt would appear on your nightstand. You always made sure to thank the house. Later that day, you decided to attempt a shower. You managed to make your way into the shower. You were glad to scrub the grime from training the day before away. Once you were ready to get out, you slipped and fell. You tried to get up, but your injured ankle hurt too badly. You sat crumpled on the floor as you called out for Azriel.

You waited a few moments in silence before trying again. Your bedroom door unlocked as footsteps approached. A knock came at the bathroom door, "are you alright?" Cassian asked. You let out a groan, "Where's Azriel?" Cassian rolls his eyes, "He's in Illyria with Rhys, Feyre is taking care of Nyx, and Mor is still visiting the summer court with Amren. You're stuck with me, princess." He says. "Fine, come in." You answer. A moment later, the door opens. "I fell." You state obviously. He grabs a towel for you to cover up with, "I can see that. Why were you in the shower?" You roll your eyes, "the acoustics are so great in here I thought I'd sing naked karaoke." You answer sarcastically.

"Ok, smartass, I get it." He says before bending down to pick you up. He sits you on the vanity, "Where are your clothes?" "I was going to change in my room." You answer. "Stay here and dry off, I'll grab your clothes." He says. You work on drying off before he comes back with shorts and an oversized shirt. He bunches up the shirt and slips it over your head before grabbing the shorts and working them up your legs. "Can you lift up so I can get these on you?" He asks as he reaches your thighs. You lift up the best you can as he slides your shorts up. "Now back to bed." He says sternly before carrying you back.

After making sure you're comfortable, he turns to leave. "Hey, Cass," you say, stopping him in his tracks, "thank you." You say sheepishly. "No problem, princess." He says with a certain sadness before leaving you alone. You lay there staring at the ceiling, day turns into night and brings a soft knock to your door. "Come in." You call. The door slowly opens, revealing Rhys. You're a little sad it isn't Cassian but quickly hide it. "Heard you fell, are you alright?" He asks as he enters. "I'm fine, just being clumsy." You say with an empty laugh. "Do you want to talk about it?" He asks as he sits on the edge of your bed.

"Do I have a choice?" You ask. "Well, you can participate in the conversation, or you can listen to me monologue...and you know how much I love to monologue." He says with a grin, making you roll your eyes. "You should really give Cass a chance." You let out an annoyed sigh, "Rhys, I want someone to love me for me and not because some stupid bond tells them to." You say. "I understand and respect that, I think you'll find that given the chance, Cass does love you for you. You're both too stubborn to realize it."How can I be certain now that the bond is in place?" You ask.

"Give him a chance to show that he's loved you all along, let go of your worries and just listen and observe." Rhys says. "If I do this and it doesn't work out, you'll leave me alone about it?" You ask. "As long as you give him an honest chance." He says. "Fine." You reluctantly agree. "But I decide when, I don't want to be trapped in this bed." You say. "Fair enough." He says with a smirk as you roll your eyes. He excuses himself, leaving you to rest. A few days pass with various people checking in on you, including Cassian.

Cassian knocks on your door before entering with Madja. "Please give me good news." You beg the healer as she checks your ankle. "You're good to resume your normal life. Just ease back into training and don't overdo it." She tells you with a smile. "Thank the mother!" You say excitedly as yku move to stand and walk around. "How does it feel?" Madja asks. "Good as new." You say. "Just don't go overboard." She says before excusing herself. You turn your attention to Cassian, "ice cream?" You ask with a grin. "Yeah, what flavor do you want?" He asks. "No, Cassian. Do you want to go with me and get ice cream?" You ask. "Are you asking me out?" He teases. "Don't make me regret this." You say.

You were happy to sit outside with Cassian eating ice cream. It was a mich needed change of scenery. He managed to keep the conversation light as you two enjoyed the ice cream. After you finished, he asked if you felt up for a walk. You accepted as he led you to a nearby park. "How have you been?" You ask after a few moments of silence. "Alright, better now that you're ok." He says quietly. "Cass, be honest." You say nudging him. "You don't want the honest answer." He says, staring off ahead of you.

"I always want the honest answer, and if you want me to accept being your mate, you won't lie to me." You say. "Like you lied to me for weeks about being mates and avoiding me?" He says with a raised brow. "I didn't lie. I just didn't tell you." You answer. "Same thing." He says. "I'm not alright. These last few days have been miserable. I wanted nothing more than to take care of you, but you didn't want me to." He says as you keep walking. "Cassian, I want you to love me for me and not because the bond tells you to." You say trying to explain your reasoning. "I do love you for you, I have for years, but I didn't think you'd ever love me." He says.

"That was why I started pursuing Nesta." He states. "All the times I took care of you over the years when you were sick or injured, the gifts you always said were perfect for Solstice. Everything kind I've done over the years was out of love for you. The bond hasn't made me love you. it's only amplified the feeling." He declares. "Cassian, I had no idea, I don't know what to say." You tell him. "Let's get you home. You've had enough for one day." He says using your ankle as an excuse. You let him take you home where you go back to your room. You stayed there the rest of the night, thinking about what Cassian said and reflecting over the last few years.

You remember all the little things he's done for you. How he always was the first one to offer you any sort of comfort. How he always took care of you when you were injured, no matter how small. He was always your person, but you only looked at it as him being a good friend. You noticed the subtle flush of his cheeks when you complimented him. The way his eyes would linger when you trained on hot days wearing shorts and tank tops. He was always the first one to notice when you were struggling mentally. It was always him, and you'd been blind until now.

The next morning, you decided you needed to tell Cassian how you felt. You made your way to his room and knocked. There was no answer, so you pushed the door open, revealing an empty room. You ran outside to check the training area. Cassian wasn't around to be found. His end of the bond was dark, shielded from you. You mentally reached out to Rhys asking where Cassian was. He told you he had left for a mission and would be gone for a few days. You thanked him for telling you before you put your shields back up. You made your way back into the house, but instead of going to your room, you make your way to his.

You grab one of his shirts from the closet and change into it before climbing in his bed. Losing yourself in the scent of him that lingers on his blankets. You stay there until you fall asleep. You continue to stay in Cassian's room and wear his shirts until he comes home. You checked the bond each day, but he never opened his end. You left your end open in case he changed his mind or needed you. For the few days he was gone, it was silent and dark.

You were curled up in his bed sleeping when he opened the door and stepped in. He was startled to find you in his room, let alone in his bed. He had gone to Illyria to get away for a few days and check on the camps. He stripped down to his boxer briefs and climbed into bed beside you, causing you to stir. "It's just me. Go back to sleep." He says softly. You settle back in, and he smiles at how cute you look. He wonders how long you've been in his room until he notices his blankets smell more like you than him. As he starts to drift off, you turn over and lay your head on his chest. He carefully wraps his arm around you, pulling you closer, "Sweet dreams, princess." He says gently.

You wake up with a start feeling a hard body against you. You look over and see Cassian still sleeping. You start looking him over for any injuries and find none. You can't help but notice how peaceful he looks while he sleeps. "I can feel you staring," he says sleepily, "go back to bed, it's too early." You can't help but smile, "Fine, i'll just ask Azriel to train with me since my mate is too tired." You tease. Cassian opens his eyes, "did you just say what I think you said?" You nod, "unless you're rejecting -" He cuts you off by pressing his lips against yours in a searing kiss, Breaking it moments later, "I would never reject you."

#acotar #sarah j maas #batboys #acotar fanfic #acotar angst #cassian x reader #cassian acotar #cassian #acotar fic

[kjhbsies]

Love Strum

HELP PALESTINE • donation links • ways to help • why you should not buy/support TLOU2 remaster

PART I : PART III

Rockstar Ellie Williams x fem!reader

Synopsis: After a series of arguments and misunderstanding, Ellie finds herself on a mission to win you back. Determined to prove her sincerity, Ellie starts working on improving herself.

However, as you and Ellie gain trust and potential liking for each other, your charming schoolmate enters the scene, inciting jealousy inside her.

wordcount: 3, 808

It’s been a week since the incident happened.

And yes, the internet broke in hell as the videos of Ellie started circulating. However, it was not what Jesse thought it would be.

Rather, Ellie and the band became viral as her different fangirls and fans club became obsessed with how she protected the guy who molested you. And how they found Ellie getting angry and possessive over you, somewhat, hot.

Ellie and the guy he beat up settled everything, much to Jesse’s luck. But after that, the band is taking a two-week break just to make the incident die down. Tonight is its end, thus, they are going to play again tonight.

But what was Ellie doing right now? Laying on the couch in her fancy penthouse while taking a swig of alcohol. To be honest, she has a lot in her mind right now. She could be writing everything in her notebook so she can compose a song dedicated to you. But Ellie doesn’t have the energy to lift her body because of her guilt.

A part of her brain wanted to find and apologize to you. Ellie knows that you don't deserve it. No one does. But something inside her doesn’t want to accept that she likes you. That she’s head over heels for you.

Ellie knows she fears commitment and attachment, which is why she only wants to hook up with different girls, not wanting to have someone fall in love with her. I mean, she doesn’t really see herself being in a relationship with them, so why would she engage in it?

But you.

Oh, you make her really confused.

Jordan walked in. Both of her hands are tucked in the pockets of her oversized hoodie. She sat in front of Ellie before sliding a piece of paper on the coffee table.

Ellie’s brows are knitted. “What’s that?” She asked before taking a piece of cigarette and a lighter.

“Her name, address, personal information… whatever the hell you need.” Jordan shrugged before leaning at the couch.

That night, after leaving you and Ellie alone backstage, Jordan managed to find out your bestfriends in the middle of the crowd. They were talking to some bouncers, rambling and asking where you went and what happened to you. Jordan managed to pull the two in a quiet corner, answering their questions. In return, Jordan asked for your name and personal information as they badly wanted to apologize to you personally.

“Who?” Ellie asked, despite knowing who she was talking about. She picked up the piece of paper and stared at it. Her jaw tightened as she read your name. After all those years of her trying to unmask that mysterious fan girl, she now knows you. But at what cost?

“Stop fucking around. You know who I’m talking about.”

Ellie lit up her cigarette before putting the paper down the table once again. “What should I do about it?” She asked stubbornly.

Jordan stared at her, dumbfounded. “You’ve said some hurtful things to her, Ellie. You should fucking apologize, dude!”

Her eyes shut down before blowing a puff of smoke. “That’s the thing… I don’t fucking know how.”

“I know this is some ironic thing to say but dude… grow some fucking balls. I know you think that she’s just nothing but your fan girl, but that doesn’t give you the opportunity to be a fucking asshole to her. You might think that she’s gonna come back running to you just because you are her fucking idol but what happens if she didn’t?” Jordan breathed. “I saw her that night, dude. She’s fucking crying while running out the bar. I don’t know what happened, but it looked like you didn’t care at all-”

“I fucking care, dude! That’s the problem because I don’t want to.” Ellie said, angrily. “I just want to be able to live carelessly, bed different girls at night, have flings then and there but it’s like her existence forbids me from doing that. I don’t know what she’s done to me, but ever since I saw her at the shitty bar at our gig in April three years ago-”

Jordan’s eyes widened. “Three years ago?!”

Ellie nodded while taking another puff and drink. “This is all fucked up, right? I think I’m fucking losing my mind.”

“Why didn’t I notice that you’re in love ever since.”

“I never said anything about being in love.” Ellie shook her head.

“It is love, dude. What do you want me to call it? A fucking miracle?”

“M-maybe!” She shrugged.

Jordan stood up. “You’re insane. Come on, I’m taking you to her place.”

“Right now?” Ellie panics, her eyes turning wide. “Nah, dude, we have a gig.” She backs out.

“It’s only 2:00 PM, stop over-reacting.”

And with that, Jordan started to pull Ellie by her wrist with so much force just because she kept pulling back. And because Ellie is much stronger than her, this made it harder than it is. However, because of the liquor Ellie was drinking earlier, she lost the battle. She figured out that it’s better to apologize to you personally. Ellie is now mustering all of her courage to face you. She figured she could do it. She is Ellie Williams.

She could not do it.

Ellie feels like she’s going to puke, literally. Her feet and hands are getting cold with every step she is taking. She bought a bouquet of roses on the way to this cafe, which apparently, is right outside of your apartment. How did Jordan make you agree to meet up with them? Ellie did not know. She figured out that after your argument, you wouldn’t want to show up near her. And maybe it’s for the better because Ellie is an asshole. She deserved it.

Ellie spotted you sitting on the corner of the cafe, you were immersed in a novel you’re reading while wearing headphones in your head. The sunlight shone perfectly at your figure that Ellie couldn’t stop staring at you.

You looked up at the two figures standing in front of you and you gently removed the headphones in your head, stopping the music in your phone, and sighed. Now, if it was a normal day and the argument between you and Ellie happened, you would’ve been ecstatic. You would’ve been giddy in your seat and most probably, you’re jumping in pure happiness.

But right now, looking at them, especially the girl that you thought you’ve been in love with the whole time, isn’t just the same.

“You two should talk, okay? I’ll be right there.” Jordan pointed at the seat near the two of you.

You nodded and put on a tight-lipped smile. Ellie slowly sat in front of you.

“She said you wanted to talk.” You started.

Ellie scrunched up her nose, as nervousness started to make its way onto her nerves. She couldn’t stop fidgeting and playing with her rings and the flowers. You sounded so sweet and gentle, contrasting her dark and cold voice.

You are so pure and Ellie is just not…

“Yeah. I wanted to apologize.” Ellie said, placing the bouquet of flowers at the table which you just blankly stared at. “I didn’t know w-what flowers you wanted so…” She stammered. Shit, shit, shit. “It’s fine.” Despite everything, your heart still jumped at her small effort.

Ellie looked at you. “I’m sorry.” She finally said, making you stare at her back. “It’s been two weeks and I can’t stop thinking about what I said.”

“Good.” You nodded.

Ellie sighed. “I didn’t mean everything. Saying those mean things about you was such a low move. A-and if you won’t forgive me, I’ll understand.”

“I forgive you.”

She looked at you. “Really?”

“Yeah…” You shrugged. “I just… got disappointed that night.”

Ellie’s heart dropped.

“You know, for three years, I embarrassingly liked you. At first, I did want your attention. I mean- who doesn’t, right? You were my… everything.” You gulped, a lump started forming in your throat. “But as I grew older, I am content to just stare and like you from afar. I always dreamt of what it would be like to be near you but that night, when I finally talked to you, it didn’t go as I expected. So, yeah, guess you can say that I was disappointed.”

“I’m sorry.” Ellie’s gaze dropped.

“It’s fine. Really. I accept your apology.”

“Do you still like me?” Ellie blurted out without thinking.

Both of your brows rose up as you were taken aback by her question. But after a few seconds, you smiled at her sadly. “I don’t know.”

I don’t know.

I don’t know…

I… don’t… know…

Those three words never left Ellie’s mind ever since they left the cafe. It’s been two days, and she’s still thinking about it since, and she didn’t know what impact you have on her until you’ve said those words.

She really couldn’t believe that she’s getting all worked up over this.

“Tough crowd?” Alex asked before throwing a cold can of sparkling water at Ellie.

“Nah, they’re great.” She shook her head before opening it.

Alex looked at her skeptically. “Then why’d you look like you’re spacing out the whole time?”

Ellie’s brows are now knitted. “Am I?”

“Yeah, dude, what happened? Jordan told me about y/n. What did you two talk about? Spill.” She said before sitting on one of the stools backstage.

“Nothing, man. I just apologized. “

“And…?” Her brows rose up.

Ellie looked her dead in the eye, not wanting to give in and talk. But a small part of her wanted to ask for help. Besides, it’s what Alex is good at. Who would Ellie want to talk to and ask for a piece of advice? Then with someone who is in a healthy relationship of three years.

Ellie sighed before sitting on the stool beside her. She clicked her tongue before talking. Still somewhat unsure, but… “She was this girl I’ve always seen in our gigs or concerts for three years.”

“Yeah, I know, you always ask for her name.”

“And I never got it.” Ellie rolled her eyes. Alex nodded. “I don’t know, man, I just got overprotective of her that night, and then got drunk, and said some shitty things to her.”

“You know, I never understood that part.”

“Fair enough. I just reacted so badly when I saw her in front of me. But mainly, I was pissed because she has this… magnetic energy that I just couldn’t forget. And I never understood why because she’s… she’s just…” Ellie sighed, not wanting to finish it.

Alex nodded repeatedly, understanding the whole situation.

“So you can’t accept the fact that you fell in love with your fan-girl and not the other way around? And so your pride couldn’t take it all in because you’re you?” Ellie nodded.

“So you’re afraid of feeling like a fucking loser. Maybe you should ask her what she felt. Pretty sure you two could talk it all out.”

“I did.”

“And what did she say?” Alex stared at Ellie.

“She said ‘I don’t know.’”

“Oh.”

Ellie nodded again.

“And what did you feel?”

“Like a fucking loser.”

“Oh…”

The two of them sat in silence for five minutes before Alex clapped her hands and went in front of Ellie.

“So here’s what you’re gonna do.”

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Three days after you and Ellie talked and you were still thinking about how unreal everything was for the past few weeks.

In that short amount of time, you got into a huge mess in a bar, unexpectedly argued with your long-time idol and crush, and now she actually went to see you in a cafe? I mean, what the hell? And now, you just got a text from her which you are debating what to say as she’s asking if you are free to go into a private bar.

Ellie: Don’t worry about the transpo, I will send someone to get you.

Ellie: Consider this as compensation for my shitty behavior. Will you go?

Ellie: Please?

“God, how can you say no?!” Your friend, Dina, exclaimed before dramatically falling down the bed. “At first, I don’t really get why you’re so obsessed with her for years but fuck, I saw her face to face and she’s so hot. I just thought I would combust while looking at her.”

“Jesus.” Cat said, side-eyeing her. “I think you should stand your ground and make her pay. For a girl with such a popular status and huge wealth, she probably has a huge amount of ego and you should not give in to her.”

“But she’s hot.” Dina pointed once again.

“Yeah, she is.” You and Cat said in unison.

You shut your eyes and flopped down the bed next to Dina. “This is so fucking hard.”

“Just say yes!” Dina said and Cat immediately protested. She sat in the bed. “But! But! Just hear me out! You should still act cold and make her pay!”

“And how do I do that? I almost cried when I said that I don’t know if I liked her now.”

“We’ll get you dressed.” Cat pulled you up. “And remember that you should stand your ground. You’re a pretty girl and if given the chance, I will fuck y-”

“Yup, we’re done.” You said, dismissing her.

Cat put her hands on both of your shoulders. “So, here’s what you’re going to do.”

You: Okay.

Ellie pumped her fist in the air and immediately stopped in embarrassment.

“The fuck was that?” She asked herself before typing.

Ellie: See ya.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Wearing your burgundy satin dress that Dina thought would perfectly hug your curves and compliment your skin, sleek makeup, and your hair is done perfectly, you never think you’d look this good.

The lamborghini Ellie was talking about picked you up in front of your apartment and every one stopped and stared in pure amusement. The private bar is a 30 minute drive and it is a fancy one. A jazz song is playing, making this place very romantic. Right now, you were sitting in front of Ellie, trying so hard not to stare but you just couldn’t help but look at her.

She’s wearing her formal suit and the first three buttons on her dress shirt are opened as the red tie on her neck is loose. Ellie sipped onto the wine, looking at you shamelessly.

“You look pretty.” She muttered, causing your heart to jump. Your eyes flicked at her before you smiled and Ellie can almost feel her grip on the glass becoming shaky.

“You too.” You said honestly. “Aren’t you afraid of getting caught with me?”

“Why would I?” Ellie poured wine at your glass. “Don’t worry. No one’s going to ruin this for us.”

True enough, you two had been talking for the past hour. You never really thought Ellie would redeem herself like this but you were glad that she’s taking accountability for what she’d done. Both of you learned some things from each other, and it was Ellie’s first time opening up with her personal life to a girl.

Ellie found out that you’re in your second year of college and is taking a psychology course. Ellie was so amazed and was frequently asking you about different things in human behavior and you answered it with such intelligence. You were so immersed in talking passionately about what you love that it warmed Ellie’s heart.

On the other hand, Ellie said that it was her dream to study science. She wanted to be an astronomer when she was young but it shifted when she became popular. Though, she would still like to study about it.

When it was time to go home, Ellie personally offered to drive you in front of your apartment, while using a different car – not the one that she uses every time because of paparazzis.

And it all went like this for weeks. Ellie never stopped talking to you in text. And, whenever you’re free, you’d go to their gigs or concerts with your friends. Jesse, their manager, would get you backstage as per Ellie’s requests, and, sometimes, the whole band and your friends would go to different restaurants to hang out.

You were supposed to meet with Ellie tonight, in a small, secluded town where no one could potentially see the both of you together. It was Friday night, and you thought it would be the best time to go out and have fun after a long week full of tests, projects, and school work. Besides, you did great for all of them,and Ellie’s going to treat you for an ice cream date.

It’s been 10 minutes, and she’s still not here. You’re in a park filled with colorful lights and fun decorations, and you amuse yourself by taking pictures and updating Dina and Cat. And then, after quite some time, you stood up and went to sit in a swing, pushing it ever so lightly.

To be honest, it’s getting quite late. And Ellie still isn’t here. There were no texts or calls from her, and you were not going to ask where she is for the third time.

Sighing, you kicked a rock, but it hit someone. A familiar tall figure looked at you with a fake shocked and hurt expression. And your eyes immediately widened.

“Oh! I’m so sorry!” You stood up.

The said person laughed. “It’s fine.” She answered. “Are you okay? You seem annoyed and spacing out.”

You hesitated in answering. Part of you wanted to talk to someone, but something inside you just wanted to not say anything about it. It’s humiliating because you got stood up. And the one who’s in front of you right now is none other than Abby Anderson.

To say that she is quite famous in your university is an understatement because she is more than that. Her father is a surgeon, thus making her one of the richest girls in school. She’s a top student ever since, and she’s actually the Biology Society’s president. Many people knew her, even from different universities as she’s always competing in research.

You two are just acquaintances, only sharing a few words when you always see each other at different organization’s meetings, or events where their college and yours are going together, and when you see each other in hallways. But seeing Abby in her comfy clothes at night, just casually walking in a park, is something you'd never think you’d see as she’s always so formal.

“This is so embarrassing, so I wouldn’t say why I’m here, moping all alone.” You sighed, putting up a thin lipped smile.

Abby nodded, putting her hands on her pockets. “Okay. I won’t ask further.”

“Thank you.” “Do you want me to accompany you? Or are you going to leave now?” Abby sat in a swing beside you.

“I might hang out here for a bit. I just want to take a breather since it’s been a hell week.”

“Right.” Abby rolled her eyes while smiling. “I think I haven't got a good sleep since Monday started.”

“I can’t even remember the last time I had a decent meal.”

You two laughed.

“God, I look like an idiot right now. I’m sorry you had to see me like this.” You look at her, and you find out that she’s already staring at you.

“Stop saying that.” She said, “Whoever ditched you tonight is an idiot. I’ll never make a pretty girl like you wait for nothing.”

You didn’t ask how she knew what happened. And instead, you smiled. “Really?”

“Really.”

Your gaze fell on your lap. “Yeah, she’s kind of an idiot.”

“Well, let’s go find something to eat. I’m starving.” Abby held out her hands in front of you, and you immediately held it.

You and Abby decided to eat ramen first. She insisted that it’ll be great, since the weather is cold tonight.

“It’s my favorite ramen shop. I always go here when I’m feeling stressed.” She said while mixing the noodles carefully.

“You always go here?” You asked before taking a bite. True enough, the ramen is good, aside from this, it also came with a lot of side dishes.

She nodded. “My apartment is near here. How about you? Where do you currently live?”

“Oh, my apartment’s in the next town. It’s 30 minutes away from here but if I’m going to take a bus, which is what I’ll be doing tonight, then it'll take me an hour.” You checked your watch. “I’ll accompany you. My car is parked in here.”

You immediately shook your head. “No, I can manage, really.”

Abby hummed. “Nah, I can’t let you go on your own. Besides, it’s already 11 in the evening.”

“But-”

“No buts. Eat your ramen and then we can go get some sundaes before I take you home, okay?” She asked you and you immediately complied.

“Wait, you lived with Cat?” Abby asked when she saw the familiar street.

“Yeah, you knew her?” You asked, surprised.

“Well, yeah, she’s a cartoon editor in the uni’s publication. Back when I was still a feature writer, we were very close. We still are but not as close as before. I got really busy with being the BioSoc’s president so I kinda dropped the position there. It was a really fun experience, though.”

“You’re very smart.”

Abby smiled, stopping in front of your apartment. She looked at you, “I try not to disappoint my father so it’s kind of my job to be smart.”

“Oh.” Your gaze dropped down your lap. Your phone buzzed but you ignored who’s messaging you right now.

You and Abby got out of the car.

“I had so much fun tonight, y/n.” Abby said and you nodded.

You were about to answer when you noticed a figure behind her. Abby sensed that your gaze fell somewhere, which is why she looked back.

Your phone buzzed and you looked at it. It was text messages from Dina…

…and Ellie.

Ellie: I’m sorry, I had an emergency. You still there?

Ellie: Hellooo?

Ellie: Your friends told me that you’re probably on the way back. I’ll just meet you in your apartment.

Dina: DUDE WHERE ARE YOU?

Dina: WHO IS THAT FINE GIRL WITH YOU? THAT’S NOT ELLIE.

Dina: OHMYGOSH IS THAT ABBY?!???

Dina: I FEEL LIKE I’M WATCHING A LOVE TRIANGLE MOVIE. I’M SO TAKING A PICTURE OF THIS RN.

Ellie’s brows are knitted while looking at the unfamiliar girl who’s with you right now. Abby stared back at her with an unamused gaze, making Ellie slowly getting annoyed. She’s holding a bouquet and a box of donuts and a tub of ice cream on the other hand.

“Who’s this?” She asked coldly.

divider from: @saradika-graphics

#ellie williams fanfic #ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams x reader angst #ellie williams #ellie williams x reader

[redrose10]

Chapter 7 is here! It’s a little shorter that the previous ones. Next chapter in a few days as usual. I may not respond but I do read all the comments and messages and I appreciate them.

Yoongi X Female Reader. CEO/Arranged Marriage AU

Summary: You were selected to marry the wayward CEO/Billionaire/Heir, Min Yoongi. You went into it with an open mind and heart determined to try and make it work. Yoongi on the other hand had no intention of ever letting you in let alone allowing himself to fall in love with you. Slowly you start to associate the smell of cinnamon and vanilla with the feelings of hurt and sorrow.

Word count: 1,338

Warnings: (May get updated as chapters progress): Arranged marriage, cheating/infidelity, hints of smut (Probably won’t get very explicit but we’ll see how it goes), Sexual Assault, Brief mentions of death, Reader grew up an orphan, General Angst, Swearing

You did a lot of thinking on the bus ride home. Yoongi had tried calling you multiple times. He must’ve tried Jimin too because he also conveniently called which you decided to answer.

“Hey Y/N what’s going on? Yoongi just called me really upset. Something about you leaving and he can’t find you.”

“He lied to me. He used me. I feel stupid and gross.”

“That doesn’t seem right. Are you sur-.”

“YES JIMIN! I saw the text message.”, you said trying to lower your voice back down after receiving some glares from other passengers.

“Okay okay. Where are you now?”

“I’m on a bus. I’m gonna go pack up some clothes and then find somewhere else to stay. I’m not spending another night with him.”

“Y/N I think maybe you should give him a chance to explain. If you told me months ago that Yoongi did this I wouldn’t question it but I just don’t think this is him any more.”

You gave him nothing but silence in return.

“Alright well be safe Y/N. My doors open if you need it. Call me.”

The bus had to make several stops along the way so the ride home took longer than you would’ve liked. When you finally entered the penthouse Yoongi was already sitting at the kitchen table. When he saw you he jumped up and ran over,

“Y/N are you okay? Where did you go? Please let me explain.”

“Explain what Yoongi? How you lied to me? How you used me? How you’ve been trying to ruin my life for the last year?”

“Y/N, yes I’m the first to admit I didn’t treat you like I should’ve. I know that and I’m owning up to it. I swear on everything I didn’t sleep with her.”

“Okay Yoongi. Say I believe you, which I 100% do not, how do I know there aren’t other women? How do I know you aren’t lying to me about all of this right now? You don’t exactly have a good track record.”

“Y/N I promise you. You have to believe me.”

“Not good enough.”, you laughed.

You ran off to your room stuffing several days worth of clothes into a bag to take with you. As you were zipping it up a patch of gold at the bottom of your closet caught your eye. You smirked as you grabbed the gold wrapped box and your bag and walked out to the living room to find Yoongi.

He was sitting on the couch staring down at the ground.

“Here, Happy Anniversary.”, you said handing him the box.

He looked up at you with furrowed brows.

“Seriously take it. I already spent the money on it so you might as well have it.”

He cautiously grabbed the box from you and tore away the gold wrapping paper. He took off the lid of the black box and chuckled to himself. He held it up to you with raised eyebrows.

“Yeah I thought of the idea a while ago before things started improving between us. But then I decided that I wasn’t going to give it to you after you had actually began acting like a decent husband. I think it’s fitting now though. Don’t you agree?”

“What did you have this special ordered or something?”

“Yeah turns out that when you have money you’re able to get a lot done.”

Yoongi scoffed and set the box down on the table.

“Y/N I know I fucked up and treated you like shit. I admit that. I can’t change it or take it back and I regret it every day. But I was ready to do anything and everything to prove to you how much I’ve changed and how I was going to be better husband.”

“Yoongi, do you know how alone I’ve felt this whole time? How heartbroken I’ve been? How stupid I felt? I’ve sat here and waited for you like a dog and for what? I’m an idiot for staying so faithful to you. Maybe Mia had the right idea. Marry you and get all the perks that come with it but still get to sleep around the town. It’s what you do anyways. I think that’s what I’m gonna start doing from now on too. No more sitting around like a good little housewife waiting for my husband to return. I’m an even bigger idiot for thinking you could change. That you’re capable of loving someone because you’re not. You’ll never love anyone, not even yourself and because of that you will never truly be loved by anyone.”

You felt out of breath but lighter after you got all of that off your chest. Yoongi looked at you with tears in his eyes. The first time you’d ever seen him cry and just like that the weight was back. Maybe you had been a little too harsh but you kept telling yourself he deserved it.

Silently he walked over to the entrance way and began digging through one of his bags before pulling out a package wrapped in blue and purple paper. He walked over and handed it to you. “Here, Happy anniversary Y/N. Now go run to Jimin or Taehyung or Namjoon. Fuck every guy in Korea for all I care any more. I’ll just go back to being cold asshole Yoongi who constantly fucks other women since that’s all you’re ever going to see me as anyways. And maybe your right. Maybe I don’t deserve to be loved.” He turned and walked away wiping at the tears falling from his eyes. You started to reach out to him but ultimately decided against it choosing to just leave instead.

You took the gift and walked out of the penthouse letting the door slam shut behind you. Unwrapping the paper you found a cream colored book that was quite heavy. Flipping to the first page there was a handwritten note, “Y/N, I’m not good with speaking my mind so I figured I better write this down for you to read so I don’t ramble like an idiot. I wanted to get you something for our anniversary that money cant buy because you deserve more than jewelry or designer bags. I hope you like it. I’ve been working with a private investigator to track down anyone in your family that I could. They gave me one of the only numbers they could find. I called it and I was able to speak with your Great Aunt Ellie who had this book and after some convincing she agreed to send it to me. I know it’ll mean a lot to you and I can’t wait to see your beautiful smile as you flip the pages. Love Yoongi.”

You opened to the first page and instantly started crying. A photo album. He had went through all the work of tracking down your family to get you a photo album of yourself and your closest family members. Going through the pages you saw photos of you as a baby and of your parents. Photos of you on vacation and at Christmas time. Some on birthdays. A photo of you and your Aunt Erica sitting next to her hydrangea bush hit you particularly hard. You’d never had any photos of your family or yourself as a child until now. You stood in the hallway flipping through the pages with your sobs getting stronger as you went.

On the other side of the door Yoongi sat down on the couch staring at the box in front of him. He picked up the black bottle that looked back at him with such vengeance. He read over the words painted in silver,

‘Despicable, A one of kind fragrance for Min Yoongi’.

He took the bottle throwing it against the wall watching it shatter into hundreds of little glass shards. The liquid inside slowly descending down pooling on the floor beneath it. He ran his hands over his face as the scent of smoke and dark amber filled the air.

#bts #yoongi fanfic #yoongi x reader #yoongi angst #yoongi fic #min yoongi #yoongi x y/n #cinnamon&vanilla #arranged marriage au #bts fanfic #yoongi au #bts yoongi #bts x reader

[uglyducklingofthe2000s]

Pre Season Prep - Logan Sargeant

Summary: Logan has been getting ready for the season via all sorts of methods. But after a few weeks of not spending nearly fair amount of time with y/n, he decides to make sure she knows he loves her.

This starts a little sadder than I had intended but enjoy.

Also English!reader

Logan and y/n works well because y/n is so supportive and understanding of the demands of him being an F1 driver. After all she actually worths with a karting team and while kids at that age aren't quite thinking about their potential future that could lead them to F1. But their teams are thinking about their future in motorsports.

However, Logan has been very much focused on not being so notoriously bad. There is no new rookies and with Oscar being put down as a potential future champion. This season this is no room for error.

This focus on self-improvement has meant he's bene a little neglectful of y/n. Something he'd somewhat thought about but knowing that y/n understands and never seems upset, he didn't think that much about it. Not till he saw Alex and Lily leaving headquarters and that's when he realised y/n hasn't been around and he doesn't actually remember the last time he saw her that wasn't just kissing her goodbye or climbing into bed with her.

"James, do you think I could take tomorrow for a rest day?" Logan asks knowing that he is pushing his luck as he asks the man.

"A rest day sounds smart. You've been working hard for weeks with almost not rest. So take the day." James nods earning a relieved smile. "Why?"

"Just...think I need to spend time with y/n."

James looks at the young man for a beat, knowing that he himself sacrificed a relationship for this sport. But that doesn't mean that everyone should do the same. There is life beyond F1. All the drivers, all the members need to know and remember that.

Y/n has actually been so supportive with Logan, she's even tried to asked ways of which she could help and James has overheard her trying everything to keep her boyfriend pieced at his lowest points. James is almost certain that Logan would've dropped from F1 entirely if it wasn't for her and despite what people think, he's not ready to give up on Logan yet.

"Go get yourself home to her." James nods sending the young man on his way.

Logan doesn't waste time, quickly thanking the man before he rushes off. He's leaving earlier than he had initially planned to for the day but he won't be told twice to get home to his girlfriend.

Logan gets back to his apartment and finds y/n frowning as she looks at something on her phone in the kitchen, most likely making herself some food and that's when a thought hits Logan. She's been living life alone in his absence, waking up alone, eating alone and doing every day things just on her own.

"Hey, baby." Logan greets feeling almost nervous to see her.

Y/n clearly had been too caught up in her thoughts to have noticed his entrance (nothing to worry about there with her lack of security), she jumps hearing his voice and looks up. Now what really breaks is his heart is her whole body straightening up and a beaming smile appearing.

"Hey, what are you doing back early?" Cue the smile dropping in a panic. "Are you ok? Is something wrong?"

"I'm fine-good. I'm really good. Just I spoke to James about taking a rest day and he said that I'd been working hard so I could leave early and take the rest day tomorrow." Logan explains making her brighten again. "And I really wanted to see you. I know I've been MIA for a few weeks."

"You've been training. This is important."

"So are you." Logan states abruptly watching her swallow thickly. "You are important to me, y/n."

Y/n sucks in a quick breath then moving around with a small smile and kissing him quickly.

"Well I think there is some good use of your rest day that could give me a chance to give you some pre season prep that your trainer and the team lack in maintaining." Y/n hums making Logan hum and smile at her.

"Which would be?" Knowing it could be anything from one final cheat deal of the highest calorie meal she can possibly think of to going flying out to somewhere that isn't so weathered by winter and going to a beach to make sand castles.

"Building you a skin and hair care routine that you can upkeep when I'm not around." Y/n smiles earning a small laugh. "Oh come on you love our self care nights and you are well overdue for one. Your hair is dried out and your stubble is hiding the break out but you need an exfoliator and cleanser-and you have to promise me that if I find you an easy and simple routine, you'll stick to it when I'm not there."

"I promise." Logan nods smiling and looking at her with such a soft expression that she moves quickly to kiss him again. "What were you frowning at when I came in?"

"Oh-OH, well since I've just been cooking for myself, I've been trying to expand on my cooking skills. I was just looking at recipes for taquitos. I want to learn the like Texan-Mexican food." Y/n explains while he smiles brightly at her. "I know it goes against your strict and healthy diet but...maybe once in a blue moon and I can always eat it when you're not around. Anyway, that can wait till later. We need to give your hair some oil and revive it."

"Alright, you lead the way." Logan nods taking her hand and letting her rush with him to the bathroom.

Admittedly Logan doesn't care so much about his skin of hair. So long as his hair is cut to a style that he doesn't feel embarrassed to wear it like that. But when y/n gives him the full treatment, gently massaging his dark blonde locks with the oils that she swears by for her own hair.

"Ok hair is oiled, we'll leave it on for a couple hours. Since you're home early. I can make us something to eat while we wait." Y/n beams then pausing. "I can make quiche! I was looking at a quiche recipe and it's not the most unhealthy thing I could make for you."

"Quiche sounds good." Logan smiles with a nod.

Y/n is one of those who either wants to make something from scratch or cut every corner and make nothing that requires more effort than throwing it in the airfryer. Today she is clearly eager to make something for Logan so sits him at the island counter and asks about how the past few weeks have been going since really she hasn't had the chance.

Eventually the quiches is in the oven and Logan moves to help clean up the small mess that came from making it while he firmly places y/n to sit down for a bit.

"What have you been doing?" Logan asks making her puff out a breath.

"I guess just keeping busy. I have been hitting the gym a bit more...there's a few of the kids who kart who keep asking about you. You have more support from them than you'd think." Y/n smiles then looking at him. "We could go out and watch the practice race they're having tomorrow ahead of the junior euro championship."

"That sounds like fun. So long as we get to race a couple karts."

"Oh it's turning into that?" Y/n laughs since she can kart, though she never pursued a career in racing. It was always a hobby she enjoyed and made friends through.

"That is exactly what this is turning into. We're going to have fun and actually spend some time together." Logan smiles as he finishes cleaning up.

After the quiche is finally done, the two eat and after a brief pause to let the food settle y/n decides they need to wash Logan's hair free of oil into the sink and then talks him through which shampoo and condition to use, not pushing I'm to use a mask because she knows he'll forget but she forbids a 2-1 shampoo/conditioner.

"Ok, skincare. I want to test you. Come on, what's first?"

"Wash my face then if I'm having bad skin day I need to use that little bottle with liquid and then if I'm not I use the moisturiser." Logan recites since this is far from the first time she's tried to drill a skincare routine into his brain.

"That little bottle with liquid. It's a serum, baby."

"Serum, that's it." Logan nods acting as if the word had been on the tip of his tongue but they both know he had no memory of the right word. "Yeah, so wash, serum and moisturise."

"I've taught you well." Y/n grins practically glowing with pride. It's small but given the driver had no concept of a skincare routine before her. She can't help but feel like this is such a huge win. "I'll do it though."

Really Logan was hoping for her to do it for him, she always does one step for him and then does a step of her own skincare too.

"You're so beautiful." Logan comments as she focuses on eventually spreading the moisturiser around his face. The compliment immediately earns a flustered ramble before she clears her throat and manages to find her voice.

"I'm not even wearing make up." Y/n mutters always one to quickly shoot down any positive thing said about her. A classic Brit who can't accept a compliment if it was a life or death situation.

"You don't need to wear make up. You could have the worst break out and have got no sleep for a week and you would still look beautiful."

"See that is exactly how I know you are lying." Y/n states with a small smile as she puts moisturiser on her own skin then putting some lip mask on.

"Do I not get any?" Logan asks knowing better than to push the topic of how beautiful she really is. He'll show her and prove it to her in other ways later.

In a smooth move even by his opinion, he manages to steal a kiss and the glowing smile honestly warms him from the inside out.

"I should porbably get you a lip mask. You can't keep stealing mine directly from my lips if I'm not there."

"Can it be the same as yours?"

Y/n bites the inside of her cheek in thought for a moment before seeming to get an idea.

"If you buy me some of your aftershave, I'll buy you a lip mask."

"Agreed." Logan nods with a smile. "Even tough you're coming to more race weekends anyway."

"That's fair." Y/n smiles then moving to hug him tightly. "I love you."

"I love you too. A lot. I know you always say it's ok and you understand, but I'm going to try harder to make sure I'm not completely ignoring you when I'm focusing on F1. I still want you to be a priority alongside it all." Logan sighs watching some tears gather in her eyes a little. "And I just want you to tell me if you feel like you deserve more attention. Even if it takes me a bit of time and it's not immediate. I will always find time for you."

"Ok." Y/n whispers before he kisses her again softly. "I would say the same back but you know you are way more important than any karting job."

"I know I should argue with that. But if I try you'll tell me to shut up."

Y/n grins then sighing and standing up a little straighter as she sucks a heavy breath in.

"Shall we go cuddle?"

"Yes. Definitely."

#f1 #fanfic #formula 1 #f1 fanfiction #logan sargeant x reader #logan sargeant #logan sargeant fluff #logan sargeant one shot #logan sargeant imagine #logan sargeant x y/n #logan sargeant x you #logan sargeant fanfic #logan sargeant fic #ls2 fic #ls2 one shot #ls2 imagine #ls2 x y/n #ls2 x reader #ls2 #ls2 fanfic #ln2 fluff #ln2 x you #williams f1 #williams racing #williams #williams formula 1 #williams 2024 #f1 2024 #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic

[hoonslutt]

what do u think is the nastiest thing a member is willing to do with a partner? are they willing to do everything they have ever imagined? (legal line/members u feel comfortable writing for only of course)

Nastiest things Enha Hyung line + Sunoo would do

Heeseung + Roleplaying: So for heeseung I don’t thing he is that nasty but I feel like he would be into roleplaying. Like he would like to dress up in school outfits or like cop outfits and pretend to arrest you. He finds it so sexy when your hands are bound in the handcuffs and he is fucking you really good against the wall or window. He sometimes tries to convince you to dress up in a bunny outfit and him a deer or whatever wanting you to help him in his ‘heat’, yeah he is that nasty.

Jay + Ice play: Jay is another member that I don’t see as nasty, he isnt very big on nasty he likes passion and love when he has sex. So when he tells you to put a blindfold on and lay down you are confused, a little scared but mostly excited. While you laying down you don’t feel anything until you feel the bed dip and a cold sensation on your lips. You realize it’s jay kissing you with an ice cube in his mouth, he then goes down to your neck and eventually trails to the valley of your breasts. Swirling the ice cube around your nipples as he sucks on it you have no time to react because he is already working it down to your heat and you are really gone, the cold feeling in your hot cunt has you moaning and grabbing on anything you can find.

Jake + Food play: Ok now Jake is a freaky one I know he is so to me his thing is food play, he thinks it’s a good idea to bring in things like honey and whipped cream or even chocolate syrup. When he is about to go down on you he stops and leaves the room. You are so confused when he comes in and he had whipped cream and cherries it doesn’t make sense until he tells you to lay back. He swirls the whipped cream on your nipples and cunt then puts a cherry on each nipple and one on your heat. You don’t know what to feel until his tongue attaches to your nipple and he’s flicking and swirling his tongue around the bud. He then runs his tongue down the middle of your stomach until he reaches your cunt and then he starts licking and sucking and it just feels so good and you don’t ever want him to stop.

Sunghoon + Spiting: I don’t know if you would count this as nasty bug to me it does, it started when you made the wrong move to ignore him and be more flirty with his friends. You knew it wasn’t a good idea but you also knew that if you got him mad then he would fuck you rough and that’s what you liked so you did make him mad. So here he is fucking you with one of your legs on hi shoulder and he has his hand around your neck telling you to ‘Open up’ and he lets a thing of spit drop onto your tongue ‘Swallow it’ and you do you swallow his spit. You can’t even think in this moment as when he did that he was thrusting so fast and hard you could barely open your eyes let alone think it was nasty, you don’t think you’ve ever cummed so hard before.

Sunoo + mirror sex: Ok so I know this isn’t as nasty but to me sunoo is just like jay and heeseung, he isn’t very big in nasty yet but he could get there. But you had wanted to spice up your sex life and you saw in an article that putting a mirror in front of your bed was one of the best ways to improve your sex life. Of course you didn’t say anything to him but when you forgot to close the tab the article was on sunoo couldn’t help but look at what you were reading. And when you had a delivery of a mirror he didn’t want to say anything he was surprised and a little excited that you were actually going to do it, so it wasn’t a surprise that the mirror was placed right in front of the bed and that you wanted to have sex that night in fact he had a plan up his sleeve too, you thought he would let you ride him but he flipped you on your stomach and made you face the mirror leaning down before slipping in again ‘You don’t think I knew what you were doing?’ Thrusting into you and spanking your ass hair in one hand you couldn’t keep your head up you were in too much pleasure sunoo pulled your hair to lift your head ‘C’mon baby you wanted this so I want you to watch how good I fuck you’

Ouu okay this is a good one okay so in my mind these are some of the nastiest things that enha is willing to do! But feel free to say differently!! Sorry if this isn’t that good and sorry for taking a long time to get this out! But hope you like it feedback is always appreciated love ya!💕💕

#lav! thoughts #lav! talks #lav! anon💕 #lav! asks #lav!s 🍓 #enhypen hard hours #enhypen hard thoughts #enhypen smut #sunghoon smut #jay smut #heeseung smut #jake sim smut #sunoo smut #enha hard thoughts #enha hard hours #enha smut #park sunghoon smut #heeseung hard hours #park jongseong smut #jake sim hard thoughts #sunoo hard hours

[cursedconstellation]

I just had the absolutely diabolical thought-

After Cas died the last time, Dean just shut down. He wouldn't let Sam speak of him, he wouldn't let himself think of him, if he saw a man in a familiar trenchcoat, he'd just turn away. Any of Cas' belongings made it to an old shoe-box, stashed away so well it could only gather dust, intentionally forgotten. As far as Dean Winchester was concerned, Cas might have not existed at all.

Sam, of course, wouldn't leave it alone. Every once in a while he'd mention the angel fleetingly, only to be ignored. He tried being forward, cornering Dean and begging him to at least acknowledge a part of their life was missing. He tried being careful and gentle in his approach, trying to spot a hint of vulnerability in Dean, that momentary, blink-and-you-miss-it look in his eye when he'd hear his name. He tried to be casual, off-handedly say something to catch him off guard.

"Oh, I think this was Cas' favourite mug," off to the shoebox it went.

"Cas really liked this song," and coincidentally, he'd never hear it again.

"Cas would've loved that," and whatever 'that' was would never be mentioned again.

No matter what he said, as soon as Cas' name was uttered, Dean suddenly could not hear it. Even when it was left unspoken, as soon as it became clear who 'he' that Sam incessantly talked about was, it fell on deaf ears.

Months went by, and Sam would not give up, he'd never give up. However his attempts would become more sparse and he'd go weeks without even trying to say anything alluding to Cas. In fact, at a certain point, although he could not remember exactly when, he actively avoided the topic, just as Dean did. Some days he was too tired to confront the reality of his brother being severely unwell, and played into it, just to give himself a couple of days of false normalcy. Because Dean was 'fine'. He said so every time Sam dared to ask. So, some days Sam allowed everything to be just 'fine'.

It was one of those streaks, then. They'd have breakfast together and make a small talk, about anything and everything - as long as Cas wasn't mentioned. Dean would make a bad joke, and Sam would roll his eyes. They fell back into decades long routine, only occasionally broken by Sam, who would always end up coming back to the topic of the angel. He'd always try and catch Dean off-guard, even though he knew the outcome by heart by then. Dean would simply look away, the same, dark look over his eyes, and while he'd stand still, the same as before Sam said anything, he seemed miles away.

That day Sam didn't plan on saying anything. In fact, he himself forgot about it, caught in Dean's denial. It was truly easier that way, to just take Dean at face value, to ignore the fact everything he said, did, or perhaps even thought was a facade. The day itself wasn't remarkable in any way, either. It was as if the entire world adjusted to ignore the fact Cas ever existed in it.

They had their usual banter over breakfast, only to split up after finishing - Sam hid away with his laptop in hands, Dean would leave to work on Baby. In fact he worked on her so much, Sam wasn't sure there was anything left to improve. He never doubted that was in fact what Dean was doing, as he'd always hear banging and scraping of metal even through the walls. It was like that then, too. There was clanking, and music, and occasional roars of the engine. Yet-

At one point it stopped.

Sam only noticed it after a couple of minutes - the music still played, echoing through the bunker, but there was no other sound accompanying it. There was no delicate vibrations from tools being tossed onto the floor.

Perhaps it was his hunter instincts kicking in, or perhaps simple paranoia, but there was something unsettling about that silence.

Sam carefully put his computer away and followed the music up the stairs, listening in closely for any sound of distress, or even any sound at all, but Led Zeppelin blaring from the speaker drowned everything out. Once he reached the garage and the music barely sounded like any melody at all, with mild annoyance, he turned it off, for a moment relishing in the sudden silence.

Except- he heard heavy breathing, as if someone was gasping for air despite being locked in a place deprived of oxygen. It was loud, it was panicked, it was-

It was Dean. Dean, sitting with his back against the wall, knees pulled to his chest, tears streaming down his pale, clammy face. Before Sam could even move, Dean looked up at him, eyes wide and glistening, and he looked so terrified and helpless, for a moment it felt like he was just a scared kid, who saw something in the darkest corner of his room.

Between heavy, disorganised breaths, he managed to pant out,

"My ears keep ringing, and it sounds just like him."

#destiel #fanfiction #supernatural #spn #dean winchester #castiel #spn finale #im sorry #or youre welcome #depending on whether youre a masochist like yours truly #*casually drops the first fanfic adjacent post publically. be cool. stay cool. its fine.* #i dont know if its the greatest thing i ever wrote or absolute shit #art is subjective ig #i know this ship has sinked and drowned everyone in it but if i had to think about it so do you

[xjulixred45x]

Platonic Yandere Satoru Gojo x Demaryius! Reader

This is the Request of @nunezs-stuff hope You like it sweetie!

Genre: Headcanons

Reader: male

Warnings: PLATONIC YANDERE BEHAVIOR, CLINGYNESS, ABUSE OF POWER, MANIPULATION , UNHEALTY MINDSET, Satoru is Jelous of the children of reader, BLACKMAID, treats of violence, Mainly located in the Star Plasma Arc. Satoru is a Brat. I think is done.

okay, something basic that must be learned from Platonic Yandere Gojo IN THIS CIRCUMSTANCE is that although he was loved by his family, I would not say that he was completely genuine.

Satoru always felt entitled to MANY THINGS precisely because he was born so strong and everyone (including his family) followed that game.

Being loved like that felt like something written into his life. so to speak.

This is kind of where Geto's question comes in. Would his family have loved him so much if he had not been born with six eyes? Or did he depend on that to be so loved by people?

In general, Satoru doesn't know GENUINE AND PURE affection very well.

Satoru does not understand what NORMAL love is, so he wants it desperately as it is something he cannot obtain through "conventional" methods such as money or favors, no, it is something SELFLESS that he really does not distinguish.

IT FRUSTRATES him.

But he manages to reach adolescence without that feeling, he spends much of his greatest losses and TRAUMA alone (Riko, Touji almost killing him, Geto leaving him) and he doesn't have what others would have in that situation, there is no comforting hug or someone who tell him that everything "is going to be okay."

No. he is alone.

But that's when he knows you.

You are a sorcerer who has managed to stay quite long (not Tengen level, but you are quite good at what you do).

You have developed many powerful abilities, but at the same time you have also been able to see many things in the world that you have wanted to improve or change for the better.

Thanks to this, over the years you adopted many boys and girls around the world while you learned powerful techniques that made you unstoppable.

These children got everything from you, a roof, food, training, LOVE. They were indebted to you, so they followed your teachings.

They even brought even more children for you to take care of.

You were satisfied with your life.

but the higher-ups of the world of Jujustu felt threatened by you and your techniques.

It didn't help that your children were just as threatening and, unlike you, had no problem using more violent methods to defend themselves or your honor.

For this reason, Satoru was in charge of trying to find you and take you to the higher ups with the purpose of executing you.

Satoru from the beginning found this very unfair for you, because you weren't really hurting anyone, so he just thought of giving you a lecture not to use these skills in such a public way, for your own good.

He may even have found you through your children in the beginning.

and in a way, that's when he started to feel...strange, about you.

because your children spoke of you as a loving, friendly, but authoritative figure, someone too good to be true for Satoru.

But he thought your kids were just exaggerating how good you were.

But he realized it wasn't when he met you.

he met you when you were away from your family, and even if you knew what he was coming to do, you weren't angry or upset in the slightest.

You received it where you were staying and Satoru felt...strange again.

You treated him with too much familiarity. Satoru wanted to believe it was just because you wanted to blackmail him, but no.

You were just being yourself.

Satoru wanted to know better the context of WHY you were doing what you were doing (in case you were really dangerous) but he only got a more valid reason for wanting to protect you.

That's how it started, the seed was planted and it grew like a FUCKING oak tree.

You and Satoru were spending time together when he was supposedly "looking for you" and you wanted to meet him yourself.

You were one of the few people who looked through the image of Satoru Gojo and saw something REAL.

an injured boy

It reminded you of many of your children.

But when he referred to his "old friends" with an undertone of sadness, you could see that he had lost people he loved.

so you gave him a shoulder to cry on. a hug.

It was something so BASIC that the boy had NOT EVEN had access to it at his worst. It made you sad.

For you, it was lend a hand to a hurt child who NEEDED it. Like the times you make it before.

but for Satoru, IT WAS EVERYTHING.

WAS THIS? Was this what they were missing? Did it feel THIS GOOD? having someone who sincerely cares about you...

It was EVERYTHING he needed to obsess over you as a parental figure.

Satoru felt like he was FINALLY getting what he was missing all this time.

That's why it became worrying almost immediately. because Satoru became like a clingy teenager towards you.

You didn't think it was anything worrying at first, since the two of you had had quite an emotional moment and young people tend to be more affectionate after that.

You even saw it as something positive, that he was opening up to you.

but it escalated pretty quickly.

because eventually you had to return to your Clan, to your children.

Satoru insisted on accompanying you, and even if you say no, he will invite himself and go to where you live with your children.

warning sign number one!

NOW, even with all the time you spend together, I don't think you talked about your children for a mere matter of safety.

so when you get home with Satoru, keep looking closely, and find all these boys, children, even adults, calling you dad, wanting your affection, and seeing how you look at them with love...

it disgusts him.

not because of you...but because he feels a burning rush of jealousy.

and when your children notice it, he doesn't miss the opportunity to get angry with them.

when your children attack him believing him to be an intruder, even with how well trained they are, Satoru manages to beat EVERY SINGLE one of them.

Even those who didn't want to fight...

Even when you told him to stop...that he was hurting them...

when Satoru finished with all of them. He only left you one "option" (because you had no say in the situation now): do what he wanted and no one would get hurt. You wouldn't want YOUR NEW SON to be ANGRY with you, right?

If we go more advanced in time, Satoru at the beginning was much less manageable with his jealousy of your affection.

He would like to do "typical" parent-child activities, like go play together, go out, learn something together, help him choose some type of clothes, etc.

as if he wanted to relive his childhood and adolescence.

That is, without ANY comebakcs or anything similar.

He would threaten you with physical harm, breaking your legs so I could take you in a wheelchair :) (he doesn't mean it seriously but it's to make you afraid of the idea of rebelling)

He would constantly throw tantrums to get his way, threaten to hurt your children or worse, threaten to turn them over to the higher ups.

A moment that left a mark on you was on one occasion, when you were still very depressed because of all this adjustment, and so deep in your head that you answered Satoru badly.

He literally grabbed you by the hair, pulled you back so you were close and said:

"Listen, old man, I have no problem sending one of your children to the higher ups in your place and watching them execute them, so you better start cooperating or I'll have to MAKE YOU"

only to then COMPLETELY CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE and discuss with yourself what you would like to eat that night.

Trying to escape is difficult when they have your children hostage. You already know that even if you don't fulfill their fantasy well enough they could have them executed, so it's not a good idea to know what they would do in an escape scenario...

When certain events in the anime occur, he is much more mature and gentle with you AND with your children, he may even develop his own yandere tendencies about them (whether romantic or also platonic) which honestly only scares you more.

In general, at this stage of his life, his obsession with you is based more on his desire to have even some normality.

but he purposely ignores that YOU ARE NOT NORMAL and you never plan to be.

so it's an Infinite loop where Satoru tries to win your affection.

be strong.

Shares, reglogs, and comments are very welcome!

#headcanons #male reader #jjk #jjk x reader #jjk x y/n #jujutsu kaisen #jujustu kaisen #jujutsu no kaisen #yandere platonic #platonic gojo #yandere #yandere satoru gojo x reader #yandere gojo x reader #yandere gojo satoru #gojo satoru x reader #satoru gojo #gojou satoru x reader #yandere gojo #jjk satoru #gojo satoru #jujutsu kaisen gojo #jjk gojo

[merakiui]

I still can't get over the love catting of boyfriend floyd ask I sent a while ago >~<!!! The thought of floyd staring longingly at you from across the campus, him having a visceral hatred of riddle for stealing you. I bet he originally wanted to get with riddle bc she was interesting to him buy now that's the furthest thing that he could ever want now. I wants her dead. He thinks abt killing her when he's home alone at his now partyless apartment, the thinks abt how he wants her blood on his hands when he sees her hand in hand with you when walking around, he especially wants her dead when he watches her fuck you in on her bed through her window >_<.

What does goldfishie have that he doesn't? He has money, looks connections and is fun. He has everything to ensure you have a good life. Yeah he cheated on you a few times but he spent a year repenting for his past transgressions ans is now ready and so willing to be your perfect loving boyfriend please. If he could go back in time he'd never would have fucked those other guppies if he knew it would end with you leaving him for goldfishie

- Lily anon

Omg yes,,,, orz and Floyd knows he has to be careful not to get caught because then Riddle, annoyingly clever as always, could get him in trouble for stalking. >:/ she's probably waiting for him to slip up or do something that will get him into legal trouble. While Floyd may want her dead, Riddle fondly hopes for the day in which Floyd can be out of your life for good. Aaaaaa she's so crazy and obsessed. But at the end of the day, it's her you fall into bed with. She understands you're still reeling from your previous relationship and so she can be patient. Whether best friends or more, it's okay so long as you're here with her.

You agree to hang out with Floyd because he's been begging you for another chance. And if not romance, you can try to stay on friendly terms. You're not sure what you feel for Floyd, but a meal is a meal. Riddle tags along, terribly coy and dressed up as if this is a date for her and you. Floyd hates it. He tries to drive her away by being annoying, but she persists. Most of the meal is spent with them exchanging cutting barbs, Floyd's sour glare evenly matched with Riddle's pleasant simper. Oh, she's so proud of herself. So happy. And the way she holds your arm, the way she looks at you, the way she dabs at your mouth with her napkin when you have chocolate smeared on your lips from dessert.......... it's annoying.

Floyd just doesn't get it. What do you see in her? Sure, she's your friend, but Floyd was your boyfriend. Floyd was more than a friend. He can't do anything to change the past, but he'll do better. He'll improve. He loves you, truly, and he's not sure what his past self was thinking. He has to prove this to you, otherwise he fears Goldfishie may end up having you all to herself. >_<

#twisted chit chat #lily anon #riddle kissing you on the cheek after the 'date' and giving floyd the most smug smirk when you aren't looking #oooooo she is so gloating!!!!!!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for bad-mouthing my boyfriend’s toxic family?

(🐈‍⬛ For me to recognize my post later)

I (20f) have a boyfriend (21m) who is physically disabled and still currently living at home with his parents for a while as he tries to scrape his savings together to move in with me. This wouldn’t be an issue, if his parents weren’t immensely transphobic (he’s trans) and outright abusive towards him. Despite having an official doctor’s diagnosis for ALL of his issues, both mental and physical, they just?? Like to pretend that he’s completely able-bodied, and that he’s making up his issues “for attention” (<- something that they’ve actually said to him)

My bf isn’t ready to leave the house just yet because he doesn’t want to feel like a burden and wants to be able to support himself without my help, despite my constant offering and support, but this ofc just means that he’s STAYING in that house, and it’s clear that it effects him really negatively. He’s improved a lot since I’ve met him in high school, but him being in that house is just. Awful for his health, his self esteem, literally everything. I guess I understand his reasonings for not leaving (he’s on his parents’ health insurance, his dad’s a vet so he gets a ton of money off his college bill, he’s got a little sister at home that he doesn’t want to leave alone, etc etc), but at the same time, I fucking HATE his parents, more than I’ve ever hated anyone in my life. He’s such an amazing guy, but I’ve seen him reduced to panic attacks just on their words alone, and it’s awful and I hate them.

I’m also very vocal with this hate. I tell him all the time. Whenever he vents to me, or mentions something awful that his parents have/had done in passing, or tries to excuse their behavior, I will tell him point-blank that I hate his parents and that he needs to leave. He gets incredibly upset whenever I say stuff like that, however, and has asked me multiple times to quit it, but it’s just so hard to see him loving them so fiercely when they literally only give him the bare minimum in return.

The reason for this post at all is because I started going off on a tangent about two days ago when he managed to escape (he has to ask for permission every time he wants to go out) to my place to destress and have a small date night, and I specifically asked him how his parents had been treating him recently because he’d been pretty quiet about it. He got really quiet and eventually told me that they keep adding really weird stuff to do for his household responsibilities (ex: dusting the UNDERSIDE of tables??) and that they’re now threatening to take away the things he loves (his phone, his books, his DOOR) if he doesn’t keep up with the new workload, which is especially hard because, again, he’s DISABLED. Well this pissed me off, because they’ve done shit like that in the past and it never ends well for him, and I started talking about how much his parents suck and how I wish he would just leave, and he got really quiet and just said “I think I’m just gonna leave now” and just. Left

In the aftermath, I feel awful about it. We’ve texted a few times since then, and he says that he’s okay and that it was fine, and how he just needs to get over it, but it’s very clear that he’s still upset by it and just trying not to make it a big issue. I know that he hates it when I badmouth his parents, but I genuinely do not know any other way to get it into his head that he needs to leave as soon as possible, if only to save his own health. I love him so so much, we’ve been together since high school, we would die for each other, and we’ve been through so much that not very many couples have had to go through, especially not at our age. I sincerely just want the best for him, and this feels like I could open the topic again and try to make him SEE, but I’m just worried that I might have upset him this time in a way that he might not be able to get over.

Sorry for this getting so long, I just feel very strongly about it and I want to know if I’m the AH here and should lay off, or keep trying to make him see that he just needs to get out as soon as possible. So tumblr, AITA?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole