#because apparently i can't handle it

[agentravensong]

ghost trick is a video game that's about these questions: "when something bad happens to you, what do you do with that trauma?" and "when you do something terrible, when you make a terrible mistake, what do you do with that guilt?". it's about fate and family and hope and truth.

but, equally, crucially, it's also propaganda for the best little doggie in the whole world

#ghost trick #ghost trick phantom detective #it's also about another very good pet but that's getting into spoilers #but yeah. spent my weekend playing this (on switch because my computer can't handle its Sick Graphics apparently) #(it was worth buying twice though) #thanks secret sleepover society and lauren the flute for streaming this #and getting me invested enough that i just had to see the rest for myself asap

[renaultmograine]

Also btw I'm still right about Vashj being a better transgender allegory than Pelagos. If you like Pelagos that's fine, but Vashj reclaiming her identity and being seen for who she is by discarding her night elven beauty and actively making the choice to do so is leagues more impactful to me than Pelagos who Woke Up A Man.

#warcraft #vashj #pelagos #reposting my apparently hottest take that people can't handle because I love evil women

[youchangedmedestiel]

What's going on on this fine Sunday here? I mean I'm enjoying my week-end quietly, scrolling over Tumblr, and I keep seeing by random posts about episode 15x18, about the confession scene of course.

And well, I feel really attacked. I was fine before I see those posts. Now not so much, thanks!

#still not normal about them #apparently #still can't handle this scene like normal people #I'll never be over it I guess #spn 15x18 #Despair #cas's love confession #and of course I reblogged some posts I saw #because why shouldn't I share the pain? #I don't want to suffer on my own #destiel #deancas #castiel #dean winchester #my random thoughts about destiel

[tearlessrain]

dfjksaghdfjg;kfda STOP SLUTSHAMING MY BOY

#she's not wrong but hey #first playthrough with mallory I missed most of the act 1 camp scenes because I didn't long rest enough #and she was fully ready to jump him #this time he's fucked astarion and attempted unsuccessfully to fuck karlach and has. whatever he's got with abdirak #and apparently she can't handle waiting in line 😔 #(Mallory lost the ability to feel shame years ago and thinks this is very funny) #tearless vs bg3

[calkestis]

.

#listen if you're living in western europe or america or canada or anywhere that's not next to the border of ukraine #and you feel the need to express opinions online about how ukraine's neighbours should handle this conflict just fucking don't #just shut the fuck up #i've seen so many dumb people - some americans some not americans #but all of them way too far away from the conflict #expressing opinions about the fact that russian drones apparently flew above romanian airspace #and how romania is stupid for not acting (as in escalating) #bitch you have no clue how real this war feels here and how real it's been ever since the first refugees arrived in our country #hell even i can't imagine how real it feels for people living 200 metres from the ukrainian border #having drones above their houses every night and knowing one slight military mistake could end their lives #i'm not saying that our authorities should do nothing which they basically are atm because they're some useless pieces of shit #but you and even i living hundreds of km away from the border can't fucking imagine what it's like to have your life on the line #so if you have an opinion just keep it for yourself cause none of us want to read it on the internet

[kitsunefyuu]

Nope not mentally ok enough for tumblr. Might delete some stuff or something.

#yoly's talks #Apparently I can't handle opinions at the moment because I'm still emotionally raw.

[slippery-minghus]

oh no. i feel like if i do not consume an entire load of bread in the very near future i will simply cease to exist.

#very uh. very worried about my finances right now #like. i'm fine. i have some savings. but i also just got to put something into my savings for the first time in a VERY long time and now #now i immediately have to take it out #and i'm getting stressed out about buying groceries #because if i dip into my savings here what about there? where is the line? #and i owe so much to taxes but i can't exactly afford getting less of my pay...... #my last paycheck was $0.66 more than my rent #my insurance is refusing to reimburse the last of my electrolysis visits from last year and like #i'm SO over the fight but that's $120. that i really actually kinda need? #and i'm starting to get that funny in the head feeling about wondering how i'm going to feed myself #i still feel so much shame about that funeral i went to years ago and my only thought during the reception after was about #how there was just so much food and i could actually eat my fill #i have leftovers for dinner tonight and it's fine but.... making a lovely vegan dish wasn't the best choice tbh #i feel like if i don't have a large helping of bread and meat i'm going to go insane #and it really REALLY doesn't help that i've apparently lost the ability to eat in the mornings #so i'm at quite a significant fuel deficit and it's stacking #but no matter how hungry i am in the morning the concept of processing solid food is just repulsive and daunting #eating a clif bar at 9am would take literally all of my spoons for the day #i was looking at protein shakes since i can handles *drinking* breakfast #but the cheapest one that meets my dietary requirements is $35 for a 12pack #and i'm uh. i'm worrying over spending $10 on produce this week #personal #and nevermind that i don't have the spoons to even GO shopping (: #(on an aside i switched back to my regular melatonin gummies last night and i Actually Slept. so hopefully that will continue and help some) #i just want to curl up in a ball on the floor and have someone gently place a roll of bread and hunk of cheese next to me in my enclosure #also it's photophobia season and i still feel like i haven't recovered from saturday #got too much sunlight and was nauseaus for half the day #my body feels so bad

[stuckhereonearth]

guess who's back in their compassion fatigue for library patrons era!!!

#HELLO IT'S ME SIGMUND FRAUD! #i've had one other Episode like this since being in libraries and it's so exhausting #and it makes me hate myself! i suddenly can't DEAL when interacting w/people who have mental illnesses that manifest in this that or the #or the other way. i stop caring about patrons' sob stories or hard days or legitimate crises or whatever else #i'm just angry all the goddamn time about being a brick wall for others' rage and sadness and issues when i'm a fucking book person who also #who also helps with technology. i cant handle my own fucking mental illnesses on any given day sometimes and absorbing others' hardships #when i'm not trained not equipped not PAID ENOUGH and having my own spirals and episodes...it is SO MUVH #i feel evil and heartless when i suddenly stop caring and am actively angry at patrons #this isn't even a carer type of work that i do! #and yet compassion fatigue in librarians is apparently super common. we're like retail workers minus patrons spending money at our #at our establishments. people are extra mean because of the tax dollars shit and the whole 'fulfilling gaps in social services' shit #losing my compassion for others a second time os fucking terrible. i don't want to he so angry and hateful. i don't wamt to be so checked #so checked out of others' suffering if the others are in front of me. it feels gross #and as ashamed as i am to say it? it weighs on me and makes me feel WORSE and so SELFISH #ann with an ie #and i am still tuned into global issues and care and am horrified #but things and people in front of me just...cease to register

[icharchivist]

laughing at people talking about the lgbt rep in gbvs and specifically avoiding talking about Belial. Like, making a list of the lgbt chara and not mentioning Belial.

We know he is toxic rep but own up to it. Belial didn’t give us the most fascinating arc of toxic devotion through death and lack of self worth to become the most beloved and incredible antagonist of the saga for u to not count him just because he’s a baddie. Who hasn’t started two apocalypses for their lover once anyway.

#mister is out there whoring himself out showing his sideballs and he's not even put on rep lists despite being a hero of fanservice #like booo where's our representation for messy bitches who can't handle a break up did you think of that #(trying to resist getting serious in the tags about how it's fine he's toxic since he's a foil to Sandalphon who's also gay and not toxic) #(like yknow when it's clearly narratively driven and not because 'eheh gay scary') #But i don't want to be serious while the other reason is just that i think Belial being toxic makes him hella fun sorry he's not boring #also apparently another fighting game from the same company that distribute gbvs has added a second trans chara to their rooster #so that's why now i see so many tweets about the lgbt rep in gbvs #but booo coward move to ignore belial com'on #ichatalks about gbf #ichasalty #also it's really funny bc it's like no mention of Belial but mentioning Vira as 'feral lesbian' #i'm so glad we moved past accusing Vira of being toxic rep but this is such a whiplash as well #also ultimately my ultimate serious take is that #the lgbt charas in granblue especially are so fleshed out as individuals that it's about them as characters #not as arbitrary 'good' or 'bad' rep #(ofc to some exceptions and esp like. mishandled stuff. but that's not the topic rn) #they have flaws because they're fleshed out #some of them have horrible flaws because this is a story with stakes as high as corrupting powers and apocalypses #and themes that escape the limits of human limitations (re: primal beasts losing it to immortality and purpose) #sometimes to allow chara to be interesting and fleshed out in depth you have to accept they won't be entierely positive rep and it's fine #it's about whenever they make the narrative interesting #GOD I SAID I DIDNT WANT TO GET SERIOUS IN THE TAGS #belial makes me think unwise don't start weird stuff in my replies thanks bye

[ayakashibackstreet]

I can't believe I got cursed and I have to pay over 100PLN to get the curse lifted smh

#guess who came back from the dermatologist #so uh #yeah it's actually psoriasis #guess I officially have two autoimmune diseases/disorders huh....... #either way that's a huge prescription I got there #by my standards anyways #apparently we'll be handling the dandruff too because apparently that's also reached the level of abnormality #but yeah the doc looked at it and went 'you got really unlucky with your genetics' #sir you don't know half of it..................... #but hey #honestly #I don't really care #I just want this to go away #the thought of maybe not having to go through the scratchy -> scratching -> in actual pain and can't sleep pipeline so often is so tempting #and so beautiful #that I might cry #he looked at my hands too #and what I thought was maybe some allergic reaction to the varnish I was using #is also psoriasis actually #so :) fun :) #he told me to keep my stress levels in check #sir I have an anxiety disorder.................. I'll try my best but it's probably not going to limit the stress to an acceptable level #anyways gotta go with the dog #and buy those meds

[adammilligan]

something about how michael was built for war and he’s lived through and won endless battles and did win the war against lucifer so long ago but the first time we actually see him lose his composure on screen is when adam asks him, very gently, if he still cares about what god thinks of him after he left him in the cage. when he gets frustrated and even snaps at one point and adam is still so kind to him anyway. something about heaven’s most terrifying weapon being rendered speechless at one string of words spoken with nothing but gentle concern. not to drag a quote into this but quite literally sometimes being offered tenderness feels like the very proof you’ve been ruined

#like he can handle war but he draws himself up defensively and can't even speak when adam confronts him with nothing but kindness #behind the gesture #and that line is still so interesting to me! because it kind of implies that michael hadn't been acting like he cared about being #the favorite anymore. which to be fair he hadn't! he ditched heaven to hang out with a human that's far from how god's favorite should act #but the new identity michael was building for himself was still shaky especially since yknow. a lot of it was developed in a cage. in hell #so it makes sense that when confronted about it he would start clinging to that old identity all over again. it's very human of him actually #and with adam's real genuine concern/confusion over it + how it's apparent that they talk to each other about everything #it makes me think that no michael didn't actually care about being the favorite anymore. even in 15x19. ESPECIALLY in 15x19 #in 15x19 especially it was a combination of a) his unstable mindset after losing his closest and only friend #b) that loss being a direct hit on the foundations of his new identity #and c) the old identity coming back up to take its place because otherwise he might've actually gone insane. he had to function SOMEHOW #and i know there's only so many ways you can defend 15x19's genuinely godawful writing. i know. and i'm a steadfast 15x19 hater #but this is perhaps one of the only ways i can EXPLAIN it #and no bringing lucifer back didn't help. one of thee pillars of his old identity shows up while his new identity is crumbling to dust in #the face of adam's death and he's falling and you don't expect him to reach out and lean on it for support? that's just what people DO #it's like taking away an addict's best coping mechanism and expecting them not to relapse if only the one time #and he was being actively encouraged to relapse was the thing! dean going 'daddy's boy' at the beginning of the ep? their plan RELYING on #michael's death at the hands of chuck? REALLY. #these tags are not the point of this post. anyway #kate rambles #michael #adam milligan #midam

[lock-my-feelings-in-a-jar]

#sweet #the sweet #sweet band #brian connolly #i'll just post MY NEW HEADER as a post because i want it on my blog somewhere in post form #also the full picture instead of zoomed #it's probably safe to say i have officially 100% fallen for this man and i don't know what to think about that #first one i've felt like this about since bruce #and it feels like it actually kind of happened the same way #because I'VE SEEN HIM BEFORE and thought NOTHING OF IT until NOW #LIKE LOOK AT HIS FACE #THE SMILE #LOOK #THAT IS SUCH A SOFT LOOK IN HIS EYES #he looks so innocent and cute and small and precious #oh god how am i going to handle two different crushes at the same time #DO I HAVE ENOUGH ENERGY TO DEAL WITH THAT?? #ONE HAS BEEN DESTROYING ME ENOUGH AS IT IS #i already feel emotionally exhausted and i can't even eat because apparently i lose my appetite every time i start to REALLY LIKE somebody #that's when i know there's no turning back #also this is the first time i developed a crush on somebody that is no longer with us and that is wreaking a whole new kind of havoc on me #WHY DID I LET THIS HAPPEN #I LITERALLY DOVE HEADFIRST INTO THIS AND NOW I'M LIKE 'HUH???? WHY DID THIS HAPPEN??' AND I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN #THIS IS HOW IT ALWAYS HAPPENS #just ignore me while i lose my mind please goodbye

[thebirdandhersong]

#i am...... thinking thoughts and trying to sort out this story so that it doesn't turn into a multichapter nightmare #for context it is about the fittes team friendships from kipps's perspective #it will get sad but it WILL be happy at the end because apparently i can't handle tragic endings anymore

[sonechkaandthedynamos]

.

#today i was in a group of students (we barely know each other) #and one of them was telling a 'funny story' about how his mother tried her best to avoid telling the rest of the family that #he has a boyfriend because they are 'very right wing' #(i live in spain. you can fill in the blanks) #and the sadness and shame behind that story flew over some people's heads #for context he is a very charismatic and charming person and a very good storyteller #but he also had some other 'funny stories' about his family basically not giving two shits about his wellbeing #and i thought that it was very obvious that he was trying to repackage and handle through humour what's basically a #profoundly lonely experience of being implicitly and explicitly rejected by your family #and another guy replied to the first story 'i would just tell them' #like no you wouldn't #and then the guy that was telling the story told him that you can't just go ahead and come out when you're financially dependent #on your family and that you can't just cut all ties with them like that because they are your family #and this guy is a very well-meaning person generally #but he just doesn't get it #so many things that i thought were obvious to straight people are apparently not #because many of them laughed at that story as if it were nothing

[probayern]

.

#i am having. a truly awful week lmao #i've really been coping with work being incredibly overwhelming by leaning really hard on my manager/becoming friends with him #and he's out through wednesday and i'm just... so close to crying #i just want to slack him and be like hello help but i can't #i am responsible for everything right now #and i'm not fucking paid for it #i'm running two programs of 20+ employees each and i can't do it #so many things are slipping through the cracks #and the people i'm like not really managing aren't ready to be independent #so i have to provide sooo much oversight #today i asked them to figure out how to split up work so that i could assign tasks with clear ownership #and they were like that's overwhelming #and i think i did a poor job of not seeming extremely overwhelmed by that #because now i've agreed to specifically message them every time i assign something bc i CANT ASSIGN IT TO A CLEAR OWNER #im just... hello ??? #how am i supposed to provide detailed oversight into their jobs and also do the manager's jobs bc 3 of them are brand new #and i'm owning all our data and apparently agreed to lead a 4 hour offsite to propose exactly what we want to track #in 3 weeks??? #and on top of that my two closest friends have been gone for 3 weeks (from life not work lol) #and i literally cannot handle not having them around right now #so much is going on and like. my other friends are great but they don't Get me in the same way #and i really need someone to look at me and See me right now #and tbh my manager and i were kinda getting there in the friendship progression #or are. literally it's 3 days i'm insane #i'm just akfjskfjskfj struggling #bella things

[rackartyg]

just submitted my class choices for the second part of autumn term and i’m nervous. what if i picked wrong. what if they have to go down my entire priority list because my grades suck and i don’t get in anywhere so they stick me in advanced calculus where i’m really not in a good place to be (maybe next year but dear lord please not right now)

#she speaks #cth adventure #i might not even have to do advanced calc at all #it depends on what master's i want to do #i'm down to two and one of them requires advanced calc but i have no idea if i'd even enjoy it #it's either 'software engineering' or 'data science & AI' and naturally the data science & AI one requires calc but i don't know if i'd #even enjoy data science because i haven't tried it #so my first choice for next study period is 'introduction to data science & AI' which apparently has a super low fail rate actually #which is always nice #and then i put down physics because we have to do one natural sciences class to graduate and that one seems the least terrible #advanced calc is at the bottom of my list not because i don't enjoy calculus but because it has a 50% fail rate and #i can't handle that right now. i can best a 50% fail rate i've done it before but never when my bad brains have been THIS bad #(and then i stuck 'advanced programming in python' in the middle bc it's particularly inspiring but it sounds nice and isn't too difficult #judging by the grade statistics) #god i'm on my third year can you believe it #also on my third year of lousy mental health. and i still haven't killed myself. go me