#because i dont WANT to go on this stupid thing. i feel so ashamed that i have to | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

widowmaxff · 25 days

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Hello!! I was having some bad days recently, could u make a one-shot of moms!wandanat and reader with the reader having a bad week, and then Wanda and Natasha comforts reader? If you want to, of course!

enough for you

pairings: parents!wandanat × daughter!reader

warnings: bad thoughts, self-deprecating reader, lots of crying, one agent who really needs to stfu - i think thats all!

a/n: tysm for the request my love! im so sorry for the delay in posting this one shot, my life has been very busy these last few months. and i dont think this one turns out the way u wanted it, because i already made one like your request but w mom!wanda but i hope u like it :3

HOW YOU CAN HELP PALESTINE!

You always saw yourself working for SHIELD. Being able to do missions and 'save the world' was something you always wanted to do. Having mothers who are considered super heroes was also something that made you inspired by this life, but you only saw it from the outside. How they were greeted by everyone or how it seemed so easy for them to do these hero things. But when you finally got what you wanted when you turned eighteen, it wasn't what you expected.

It was the third time in the last few days that you had messed up in a mission in which you were classified. The looks the other agents gave you at the Academy made you feel horrible. You obviously hadn't messed up the missions on purpose, you would never do that. But it seemed like all those people expected that every step you took would be right, that you would never make mistakes, and that you would be as good as your mothers. Your head hurt just thinking about it. And that thought led you to others, how ashamed you felt remembering how the other agents spoke mean words to you when, again, you messed up on the mission.

You tried to distract yourself from these types of self-sabotaging thoughts about yourself by training even harder. Punching and kicking the red cylinders using all your strength, and even after hours it still felt like you didn't feel good enough, strong enough. All you wanted was to just stop thinking for at least a few seconds, and when you heard those heavy footsteps you knew that wasn't what was going to happen. "Oh, look who's here!"

You didn't care about remembering that agent's name, but you remembered exactly her voice and face, because it was her who started the whispers about how you weren't like your mothers. How you spoiled the missions of the last few days of that week, how you will never be like them. "The daughter of the great Black Widow and the Scarlet Witch, even if it doesn't seem like it." You continue ignoring her presence there, massaging your fingers to continue punching the red bag. "Do they know how you failed this last week?"

She wasn't stupid to know how horrible your week had been, how the failed missions, the disturbances and all those other things were making you almost have panic attacks right there in front of everyone. "No." Your voice was low, because you knew that if you exerted the necessary strength to reach a greater height, the tears would fall without your permission.

"What do you think they will do when they find out how bad you are?" She starts to approach you with those boots with a high step, her head lolling to the side with a tone to tease you. A smirk on her sharp face, her gloved hands resting on her waist. All those little details made you want to scream in her face, tell her that you weren't bad, but how would you say that if you didn't even believe it yourself?

"Maybe they'll get you out of here when they see how bad you are and realize that any of the agents here are much better than you, your place as an Avenger is almost invisible.” The girl laughs, her cheeks almost covering her eyes due to the action. At some other time you would find her features extremely beautiful, but at that moment, you wanted to vomit just looking at her.

Even if you tried to be strong at that moment, like your mother Natasha, you couldn't. Your fists were clenched tightly trying to control the tears from coming out, the pain of your nails in the palms of your hands trying to distract you from that moment. And every time that Agent mentioned your mother's name, your thoughts directed you only to them, how you wanted to be in their arms right now while you feel your hair being stroked by Wanda's magical hands. You knew that if you wanted comfort from your mothers they wouldn't wait a second to give it to you, and even if you didn't want to talk about why you were feeling that way, they wouldn't force you to talk.

"Where are you going? Ruin another mission?” If it weren't for the high-pitched, irritating tone of her voice, you wouldn't have even registered those questions in your head. Your thoughts were in a totally different space from that place, just wanting your mothers affection. So when you started packing your things and totally ignoring that Agent, you knew that your body wouldn't stop until you got home.

The girl's laugh echoed throughout the room as you headed towards the exit door of the place. In films, this scene would be dramatic, as if the main character was planning some revenge in their head to end the character who keeps provoking them. But at that moment you weren't thinking about revenge, or how you would turn things around, you just thought about how your mothers affectionate touches would turn that bad week into just distant memories. How you were sure that your mother Wanda would know what to say to you and how Natasha would know what to do so that your surroundings were just comfort.

You didn't wait a second before getting on your motorcycle, which Natasha had given you as a gift for your 18th birthday, and heading towards your childhood home. Even though those bad thoughts were in your head now and could possibly distract you in the traffic on the streets, you continued on your way with your eyes soaked with tears and the horrible tightness in your chest. You tried to think of good things, like your mom Wanda would probably be baking chocolate chip cookies and your mom Natasha would just be watching, since cooking isn't one of her great talents, but that domestic situation was pretty far away for you. It seemed that any self-deprecating thought stood in the way, a great layer of ignorance about happiness.

You didn't bother to park the motorcycle correctly, just running towards the entrance porch and knocking, almost softly, on the door. You heard some sweet giggles through it, confirming that your mothers were in some domestic situation, before the door calmly opened and revealed Wanda's long red hair. Her smile opened for a few seconds when she saw it was you, their beloved daughter, but when she came across the features on your face, the reddish eyes with lakes over them, her smile soon fell apart, taking its place a worried look. “Sweetie? What happened, my love?"

She took no time in taking you into her arms, even though you didn't answer her question. Your head falls on your mother's shoulder as she wraps one of her arms around your waist and the other massages the hair spread across her chest. Your hands tightly grip the blouse stuck to Wanda's body, as if at any moment she would come off and no longer provide the comfort you needed. Natasha heard your sobs from the kitchen, and she knew they were yours, she knew and kept almost everything about you. She quickly heads towards the front door, seeing her wife's back being grabbed by you, and how your body looked like it would fall to the ground at any moment.

“Shh, it’s okay, you’re okay.” Wanda whispered in your ear with her sweet voice. Your crying was loud, as if you had kept it for several days, your mother thought. She didn't know and had no idea why you were sobbing uncontrollably and why you arrived so early that day. Normally you would be completing some report, or training, since you always said how strong you wanted to get. But at that moment, everything didn't seem strong to you.

At some point you were carried and taken towards the comfortable sofa in that house. Your thoughts were so loud that you didn't even notice when you were positioned on your mother Wanda's lap. She still kept her grip on his body and the affectionate words in your ear. “I need you to breathe for me, sweetheart. Can you do that for me?” Her breathing became heavier and slower, forcing it so that at that moment you could keep up with her. Natasha, beside you two, continued to caress your back, praising you for following Wanda so well.

You finally managed to take a deep breath after what felt like hours of crying and sobbing. Your gaze fell from your mother's eyes to your hands in your lap, you felt embarrassed. Maybe because you were 18 and sitting on your mother's lap, or because you were crying uncontrollably without being able to breathe properly, or because you failed at the only thing you wanted to do at SHIELD. “I feel like a baby.” You say in a low voice, almost making your mothers not hear, even with their proximity.

"Well, you're our baby." Natasha says making you finally let out a laugh between your lips. “Do you want to tell us why you're so sad, my love?” You didn't know if you wanted to tell them or not, the negative thoughts making you think they were going to fight you, tell you how bad you are. So, you shrug and lay your head on Wanda's shoulder again, but in a position so you could still look at your mother Natasha. “I just- I had a bad week.” You murmur, closing your eyes to feel the comfort that place brought you. “And, um… I think I should stop being an Agent.”

That took their mothers by surprise. You always said you wanted to be one of the people at SHIELD and you always trained to be one of the best at that place. “Oh, and why do you think that?” Wanda questions. Even though you didn't see her, you knew she would be looking at Natasha, as if they were talking through looks.

“I’m not good enough.” You felt Wanda's body tense beneath you. Your mothers always knew how much you felt like everyone was better than you, how hard it was to believe you were good at something. “This week I- I ruined every mission I went on,” Your mother's blouse was soaked with your tears, and now she could once again feel the salt water falling from your eyes through the fabric. “all the Agents are making fun of me because of it. They say I will never be like you.”

When you finish speaking, Wanda's grip on your body becomes even tighter, you feel Natasha's hand in your hair, stroking it as you hear her sigh deeply. “I've lost count of how many times your mother and I messed up a mission.”

“What?”

“There were several times when I blew up my teammates, for example, Uncle Tony was probably the one who received the most blasts.” Natasha says, making the three of you laugh at the words. “What about the times your mother mistook me for enemies and threw me out of buildings with her magic? We had to stop missions many, many times.” She emphasizes the word 'many', as if she were singing it.

“Remember when I joined the Avengers, Nat?” She was asking your mother, but she was talking so you could listen. “I was much older than you, Y/n/n, and I couldn't do half the things you do today at SHIELD, even with my powers.” She leaves a kiss on your head before continuing. “In every training session I did, I always ended up on the ground.” You laugh again, feeling much lighter than before.

”And you want to know something? I bet you were the one doing all the mission stuff, huh?” Natasha says. “Because if no Agent has ever made a mistake on a mission, then they aren’t real Agents.”

“Your mother is right, make mistakes is human, my love, and everyone will do it one day.” You feel your thoughts start to ease now. The tears stopped falling down your face and only lightness is in their place. Your mothers always knew what to do to make you feel good.

"You're right..." You finally admit, lifting your head from your mother's shoulder and looking at the two women in front of you, seeing nothing but affection and truths.

Wanda sits you down on the couch before getting up and ruffling your hair. "Now, don't worry your pretty head about that stuff and just think about the cookies that are going to go into your stomach in a little while that obviously weren't made by Natasha!"

"What do you mean by 'obviously’?" You laugh at that one scene, seeing Natasha's arms cross under her breasts as an indignant expression is placed on her face.

And at the end of the day you knew that you wouldn't have to worry about anything - just your mom's delicious cookies - and that you knew that your moms would never think about fighting or being upset with you. And Natasha would definitely make sure you didn't need to worry about that Agent who wouldn't leave you alone. That bitch will obviously never set foot in SHIELD again.

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mournings-stars · 13 days

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Hello I hope your requests are on and if they are can I have angsty and alittle platonic headcanons for Lucifer

Where him, Lilith and Charlie run into he's ex wife who he left because he lost feelings for her and started liking Lilith after years his ex wife has movied on from him and her personality has also changed to the point its like a new person and that she has gone from a soft Naive woman to a more independent and emotionally stronger one

Thank you ignore this if you like

hello im back to writing!!! … with a bit of an angst warning

i like to think the marriage with lucifer was a lot like adam and liliths, you were basically created to be his wife. despite having free will, you were made for a purpose, so you understood lilith. you probably talked about it with him, saying you felt for her. “if i didn’t love you, i don’t know what i’d do,” you say and he smiles before telling you he loves you too

“if you ever feel how she does, and didn’t want to be with me anymore, you could tell me,” he’d say one day, and you dont think much of it

but back then you were too passive. like him, you were full of beliefs, but you were much more credulous and naive, and that led him to find someone else to share his dreams with. he used them to help comfort her and cheer her up, even telling you about it

then one day he stops

you piece it together, though — even if you’re naïve, you’re not an idiot, and you just let him go on until he plans to give eve the fruit

“don’t do this,” you tell him and he feigns like he doesn’t know what you’re talking about — or he really doesn’t because you feel like you have to say, “you must think i’m stupid,” when you see the shocked look on his face. “i know what you’ve been doing. i know what you’re about to do. don’t.”

but even if he didn’t think you were stupid, he certainly knew you didn’t think about the world the same way the other angels did; he convinced you, no matter what you knew was right, that this was the right thing to do. everything would be okay! humans would have free will, and everything would be fine

of course, that was the last time you spoke. you weren’t exactly sure if you’d ended things on good or bad terms, but in his mind you absolutely hated him, never wanted to see his face again, and were glad he fell

so, of course, once he ran into you — in hell of all places — at a high society event with his wife and daughter, he was floored. his only reaction, logically of course, was to turn the opposite way and drag his wife over to one of the princes to introduce her to

“where’s charlie?” lilith would ask him after a moment and he already knew

you were an angel, one of the only angels to swallow their pride and come to this event when invited, so it only made sense that his daughter wandered over to you and your small group of other angels — probably only there on a formality, he thought — and of-fucking-course she was drawn to you

lilith was already going over to you before he could stop her, so he went after her

you already recognized charlie; she looked so much like him, but you didn’t turn away. instead, you bent to her level and talked with her, listening as the tiny child talked about her parents and toys, and anything she could think of while you nodded along and conversed with her about her fantastical stories as best you could

“charlie, honey, let’s not bother…” he couldn’t even bring himself to say your name, prompting you to look up and introduce yourself

you didn’t know if he never told lilith about you, or if she was just being kind, but it seemed like she didn’t know your name or who you were. she introduced herself with a smile and you easily understood why lucifer fell for her

“it’s been a while,” you say to him and he can’t help but smile, relieved that your voice didn’t hold any contempt for him

but he didn’t know whether to feel grateful or ashamed when you introduced yourself to his wife as an old friend

#hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar #hazbin hotel fanfiction #hazbin hotel headcanon #hazbin hotel heaven #lucifer morningstar x reader #lucifer hazbin hotel #hazbin lucifer #lucifer x reader

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nexusnyx · 1 year

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i dont know if you take smut requests for the celebration but if you do, can i request one with joel with a heavy breeding kink and dumbification? tysm!

i... chose the proper time to write this. it's a goodnight and i hope you like it from me. xoxo — main masterlist | fireplace celebration | 🏷️: established relationship, explicit depictions of sex, minors DNI, possessive!Joel, breeding kink, dumbification, overstimulation, soft & rough sex, creampie. once again... filth? [WC: 1.2k]

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ˗ˏˋ꒰ start carvin', darlin'꒱

When it started, it was far from this... filthy thing. It was sweet, and gentler, and calmer.

It began with soft gestures and caresses, but it slowly evolved into more, and to be frank, sometimes it still is what it was. Joel never quite changed with you as much as evolved. He opened up, showed you different depths of him, and made you realize that carving up something real was still possible, but it took effort.

At first, it's beautiful enough to resemble something heavenly.

Ethereal.

Then, you spread your desire on the table like a feast, and Joel changes how much he puts out—Joel started lying down all the cards, all the ways in which he could pull you apart before he put you back together.

It should make you feel ashamed, but it only made you smile.

Joel was so good, and so fucking earnest in his desires. It made you drunk to be looked by him, and it made you high how much he liked this. As much as you.

When he first started, Joel was nothing but a gentleman. He opened you up with his tongue first, always. Then, he gave you his fingers, one by one, until you were a squirming mess. He always took his time. Always whispered and chuckled—dirty, condescending.

It was hotter than you'd like to admit.

Then, Joel started seeing how unabashed you were getting.

His words started to follow the motion.

"Look at you, darlin'. I mean it—look in the mirror. Look at fuckin' good you look right now takin' my fingers. God... what a fuckin' sight. This is what you like, isn't it? Hearin' how much you get me hard and desperate for ya? How much I dream about spending hours inside of ya? Just feeling you hot and tight around me—you're so fuckin' tight, darlin'. Jesus, look at it. That's it. Scream my name all you want. You like when I talk to ya. Get so stupid every time."

He was right about that.

It was just too much. Never fucking enough.

You wanted Joel as much as he wanted you, you like dto believe. Sometimes, you wondered—it felt too big for something this huge to exist inside the same room as you, but then, you caught him looking at you before you looked at him, and it caught up to you. How much he stared, too.

How much he liked to be close.

It did you in, the way Joel enjoyed your proximity.

He explained why he felt so comfortable with you, once. It’d been snowing outside, and you only remembered that because you were lost in how a few snowflakes were falling right on his face as he spoke. They mingled with the foxy shiny bits in his hair and beard, and you were no longer cold. You had his jacket, his body heat pressed next to yours, his voice rich and grounding in your ear.

That’s what got you that wrecked.

He was in this for more than just a release, and even if now sometimes it could be about that, it was more often for that not to be the case.

Joel liked his hands on you. He was vocal about it. “You keep lookin’ at me like that and we’re not gonna finish this,” you heard plenty of times.

It took you very little time before you were opening up to him unashamed. Not too long before you were actively pulling you towards the room, or hooking a finger through the hoops of his pants. Joel laughed as he let himself be taken, sometimes even going as far as pretending to protest.

“I’m startin’ to think you like interruptin’ me when I’m workin’ and that’s all.”

“No. I just like seeing that concentrated look on your face.”

“Yeah? Is it familiar to you?”

“How did you know?! That’s exactly it. That—this little pinch here in your brows.”

“You just like playin’ with danger, don’t you. C’mere.”

He knew you did. He just never knew how much you’d been craving and waiting for this, too, and when you started to ask for more, to give yourself more, Joel took it all, sometimes wide eyed, sometimes whimpering just like you.

For him, his darker side came out when you lost the ability for coherent sentence. When words left your mouth, that’s when Joel started to smile. To laugh. To talk at you — something he made sure to ask beforehand, with his cheeks on fire and he southern accent making everything stupidly sexy for some goddamn reason — but talk down.

It felt liberating, to be at his mercy like that.

He cooed at your inability to speak, and spun you around like a doll at his mercy. Melted at the will of his hands and arms. “Turn around for me. Just like that—m’pretty lil’ fuck doll. You’re doing—so good. So damn good. Fuck… those lil’ whines means—feels good for you, too? Can’t even answer—me. Fuck.”

Whenever those memories crept upon you, a shiver ran from the base of your neck all the way down your spine.

Everytime he glued his front to your back and got himself positioned just right, you liked to pull Joel to lay almost all the way on top of you. His weight, his thickness inside you—sometimes utters of lost words came out of you, prayers of his name, incomplete pleas for more, or drowned on, delirious mumbles of how thick he was. Deep. S’thick. Like that. Please. Joel. Joel. So good.

Joel liked taking his time on you, and seeing how long he could drag out his own release.

He was a sadist, a masochist, and, in return, he made you suffer the consequences of being dragged to the edge, only to be pulled back once, twice, three times.

Joel shushed you, kissing all over your face when your frustrated cries ended up with you scratching along his back.

“‘s okay, darlin’. I’ll give it to you. Give it—a sec. Like this… open up for me. That’s it.” Joel liked kissing you when he was buried all the way in, kissing with his tongue and teeth nipping at your sensitive lips. He kissed until you were feeling dizzy and full. “Takin’ me all the way. Are you gonna let me… fill you up?”

“Joel.”

“Joel, Joel. Fuckin’ — love my name. On your mouth. Say it again.”

It was in more than just your mouth. You cried it for him. “Joel.”

“Hold onto me.” Joel hooked his arms underneath your knees and pulled your legs higher up around his middle, starting to slow down his pace. To slam harder into you. Not brutal—with the right hips. The right drag. You were crying with overstimulation, but he stills drags one of his hands between your bodies and presses the pad of his thumb against your swollen clit, making you scream. “Yeah. Gonna feel me twitchin’ inside of you. You’re gonna cum, aren’t you? Dumb lil’ doll always — cums. When I fuck you like this. Right? Cum for me, darlin’.”

He made you see white, a tunneled and sharp vision, and you did feel twitching inside of you. The warmth of him not only around, but in you.

“‘m not done with you.”

Joel, your mind whispered. He chuckled in your neck, as if he somehow heard it.

🏷 @sakuralikestars — @mostardentily — @thegreat-annamaria — @leiticia — @polyglot-noodle — @casssiopeiaaa — @levylovegood — @simply-sams-things — @lavenderhhze — @gracie7209 — @waywardwolfbonklight — @shadytalething — @yesimwriting — @celestialstar111 — @averysblog — @pedrostories — @fleursirvart — @sirtommyholland — @capbrie — @hawsx3 — @superflymaterial — @ashleyforeverareject — @girlofchaos — @queerponcho — @am-3-thyst — @nyotamalfoy — @my-tearsricochet — @ponyboys-sunsets — @peqchsoup

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ* . join my Fireplace celebration. * | send me mail 💌

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robiny · 3 months

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I need to vent about this - is there such thing as media literacy in lobotomy kaisen ? I see nuclear takes every day and I don’t engage with them because I know these people have their mind’s set and can’t believe anything else or their fragile view point will shatter. But how can you even argue satosugu were just friends 😭😭😭 like do you even have friends? shoko and gojo are friends, megumi and nobara were friends, geto and gojo? Im sorry but how much subtext can you overlook and how much subtext can there be for it to matter. OF COURSE gege is not going to STRAIGHT UP say they are gay lovers this is shonen and you are proving him right by arguing against it. AND ABOVE ALL ELSE the thing that truly pisses me of tremendously makes me genuinely hysteric, is people misinterpreting gojo’s last words to geto. HOW CAN YOU ARGUE WITH A STRAIGHT FACE THAT HE SAID ANYTHING BUT “I love you” HOWEEEWMEMDMSMSDN HOW, WHY WOULD THAT CONFESSION BE MUTED IF HE SAID SOME BULLSHIT LIKE UR MY BESTIE WHY like genuinely, these words weren’t hid from the audience just because, ITS A CONFESSION OF FEELINGS SO DEEP SO PROFOUND BUT SHAMEFUL AND SECRETIVE AND THEIRS FOR ONLY GETOS EARS TO HEAR AND GETOS HEART TO FEEL. WHY “LOVE IS THE MOST TWISTED CURSE” I WONDER WHAT MADE HIM THINK OF LOVE THIS WAY PROBABLY FUCKING UTAHIME NOT THE GUY WHO HIS SOUL KNOWS BETTER THAN HIS ALL FUCKING KNOWING EYES. WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOUR LOVE FOR A BEST FRIEND WHO HAS HURT YOU TWISTED ??? NO TF YOU WIULDNT YOU DONT PONDER ABOUT YOUR LOVE YOU DONT HIDE IT FOR 10 YEARS YOU DONT WANT IT BACK EVEN IF ITS THE THING THAT RUINS YOU. no but genuinely any other interpretation of the words is stupid, im sorry, it’s not just their relationship but also the scene itself. getos reaction… he was shocked, then happy, blushing because it made him ashamed but at the same time smiling because it made him so happy, wishing after pushing away gojo for years that at the very end gojo would stop loving him but he never did. literally at the brink of death, finding peace in the chaos, but facing this unconditional love, geto wished only for gojo to curse him a little so he wouldn’t suffer losing him…. best of friends everybody

#anyways 😒#stsg #I’m sorry but this makes me so sick #Can gay people have anything #why are satosugu denied their love why is their love questioned #it’s literally a core part of gojos and getos characters and people want to overlook it so bad #whateva #satosugus know what’s up so it’s doesn’t matter #but it does piss me off so much lol #it’s homophobia there I said it #just shut the fuck up if you have nothing of value to say #words that were never spoken in their youths ah yes gojo never said getos his best friend makes so much sense narratively speaking #be fucking fr #satosugu #my angels darlings I will protect you #I’m a little ashamed to be so angry but I’m doing my part #someone has to fight for the gays #gay rights

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mikajunie · 23 days

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rediscovering shame and giving yourself compassion (how to deal with shame as someone with ADHD)

this is directed towards my fellow ADHDers who have trouble with reoccuring shame while leads to hindered productivity.

signs that your productivity is hindered by shame (compiled by my own experiences):

you feel negative physical symptoms when you think about your responsibilities

you find ways to avoid the responsibilities

every time you make progress, you feel like you don't ever wanna touch it again

when you present your progress, you feel ashamed of yourself because it's not finished (on time & according to ur standards).

you feel like you are a constant failure. you never win, despite achieving good things here and there.

you are a walking ball of anxiety

you have a fear of being perceived

there's probably more, but eh those are just from my own experiences

below i will write down what y'all should remember, what you can do to help yourself, etc. this is compiled from dr k, my own journaling time, and my firsthand experience from having shame 24/7

some things u gotta remember

shame is what exists in the gap between your ideal self and where you are currently.

your ideal self doesn't have to be unrealistic, it can be yourself when you were at your peak or someone who is very similar to you.

shame brings negative thoughts, because it makes you see progress as a negative thing.

instead of being happy that u made progress, u grumble to urself and ask "why didnt i just do it sooner? im so stupid". it's a reminder of your failures, so u avoid progress altogether.

shame can become a part of you, to the point where you feel uneasy or vulnerable if you dont feel ashamed at yourself

shame doesn't do anything to ADHDers in the long run except self-loathing and hindered productivity.

what should u do?

basically self-therapy, but instead of stopping at why, i try to solve my shame one-by-one.

examine past moments where you felt a LOT of shame. this can go back to elementary. the stronger the emotions, the better. now, write them down. you're probably cringing, but that is good. feel all the cringiness running through ur veins.

why did you feel shame? why did it happen? what did you feel?

reframe your thoughts. instead of immediately running away from it, accept it and justify it. give it compassion. give it a hug. was it your 7 year old self? hug yourself. it's okay to fuck up and do silly things sometimes, and it's okay to have ADHD. it's not our fault.

remember that ADHD is a lifelong nerudivergency, you can't just push it away. coping mechanisms and tools help, but give yourself some grace when you screw up. it's our first time living anyway.

calm your body down. make sure your physical body is doing okay.

now... think of one thing you want to do but can't because of shame and do these steps carefully. think of the reasons why you might be ashamed, and reframe your thoughts.

WARNING!! TAKE IT ONE PRESENT ACTION AT A TIME. don't do this for every action you want to take, let your body slowly learn that it's okay to make progress despite the shame you feel, and you are allowed to feel compassion for yourself.

train your body to accept compassion slowly. life is tough with ADHD but it's even tougher knowing that shame will get in your way. give yourself a break, it's fine to fuck up, we all go through different things anyway. even if it's not fine, you will learn and make those mistakes a lil bit lesser in the future.

ok hope this helps.

#mika rambles #neurodivergent #neurodiversity #adhd #actuallyadhd #actually adhd #adhd tips #adhd advice #adhd problems #adhd brain #adhd things #self improvement #mental health #mental illness #advice

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dabisbratz · 11 months

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toji brainrot hours disclaimer i’m not a writer

so crybaby himbo reader who’s sorta ashamed of it, he’s this big strong muscular guy so why does he cry so easily? and i feel like toji is really observant he notices that you hold yourself back and he just wants to make you cry both because he knows you need it and seeing your face go all teary makes his cock so fucking hard

maybe the reader comes home from just a really bad day, his car wouldn’t start when he was already late for work, some new guy at work spilled coffee on his shirt, his boss chewed him out overall just a really shitty day

and as soon as you walk through the door toji sees the redness of your face, your lips are all pouty and just knows this is his chance, he purposely eggs you on to talk about your day, acting oblivious to why your so mad saying “you aren’t exactly the brightest baby maybe your boss was right to get mad at you” and seeing how your breath hitches and how you tense up as you just will yourself to not cry “you’re so pretty sweetheart and that’s about all you have going for ya” letting out a little hum as he grabs you by the chin and that does you in finally letting all your tears fall down your face shouting and throwing a tantrum after letting your emotions build up all day and toji just takes it watching and feeling his cock grow hard in his sweats and he just can’t take it anymore picking you up and throwing your body over his shoulder

while walking to your shared bedroom you stay silent but as soon as toji throws you onto the bed your back to babbling about why toji would be so mean and say you’re dumb you know your a little slow when it comes to things sometimes but your not stupid! he just stuffs his fingers in your mouth and makes a little shushing noise grinning at the little whimper you make

slowly he begins to move his fingers in and out of your mouth, pressing down on your tongue and seeing how your drool begins to pool and slip down the sides of your jaw “that was me being nice pretty” reaching his other hand down to grip at your half hard cock so big and thick anybody would drool over it but so utterly useless “you want to act like your not some dumb whore huh? i’ll have that thought fucked outta you eventually, not that you have many in there anyways” more tears begin to fall down as you stare at tojis face, all pleased and looking somewhat feral, like a predator who finally caught it’s prey after a long chase and maybe you are just his dumb pretty boy

that was so much longer and rougher that i intended it to be??? but toji just does that to me ig

YOURE NOT A WRITER !?! you absolutely should be omgie!! this.. m’in shambles ໒꒰ྀི*´﹃`* ꒱ྀིა i dont even think i can add anythin!!!

i lovelovlove that condescendin n mockin tone men use when.. yea. jus yea. n toji would be so good at it, pretendin like he feels bad n doesn’t mean it, jus to keep pushin n pushin n pushin until you break!! he definitely goes ‘i know, i know, it’s just so hard to think, isn’t it? that’s why i’m here. i can do all the thinking for the both of us.’ EEEE !!?!!! ૮꒰ ˃̵֊ ˂̵ ꒱ა ?!?? n poor crybaby himbo whinin n snifflin as he shakes his head but he’s not even sure what he’s cryin about )): jus proves toji’s points

#𐂯 ! ⊹ 𝓉𝑜𝓎𝒷𝑜𝓍 — ᵎᵎ ₊˚

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red-dead-do-over246 · 1 year

Note

I'm in love with your witings , You are really talented ♡♡ ! , and I was wondering if you could write something like How will the gang members [arthur,dutch,micah,and anyone you like] react to f!reader who wears glasses because she had a very bad eyesight? (she's very insecure about it) and its fine if you dont want to

Thank you anon!💖💖 I think I will also add Sean to this list XD

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Gang Members (Arthur, Dutch, Micah, and Sean) React to Fem!Reader Who Wears Glasses Because of Poor Eyesight

Arthur Morgan

-We all know it's hard for Arthur to express himself a lot of the time, especially when it's around a lady as pretty as yourself. When he first notices your glasses, he pretends he doesn't notice as to not make you feel weird or anything.

-But he's a piss poor actor (Hosea's working on it), so you just make a comment yourself to reel him back in.

-You explain how poor your eyesight is without them, and that you need them to see practically anything. You were insecure about it, so Arthur's hesitation was well intended. But you could also sense that Arthur was going to be awkward until you told him.

-Sometimes he overreacts and thinks you are deathly blind, which leaves you embarrassed and having to remind him that you are just fine with your glasses.

-He's a respectful man to those he likes, so you knew you had nothing to worry about when it came to him teasing you or something. Arthur still noticed your discomfort and apologized if it was his fault.

-This led you guys to having long thoughtful discussions about insecurities and what not. The two of you trusted each other, so there was no worries. Just closure.

-And if anyone dared make a comment on your glasses, Arthur would send one of his sharp insults their way to shut them up.

Dutch van der Linde

-Dutch is a master with words and charm, and he takes interest to nearly every female body in camp, you included. To be honest, Dutch didn't even notice your glasses at first. All he paid attention to was the books you were reading.

-It takes a comment from Hosea to you about your glasses (cause you trusted the olde man), to make Dutch realize that you don't only wear them when you read.

-Dutch being Dutch confronted you smoothly on the matter. He was a curious man after all and none of his other gang members seemed to wear glasses. You were shy about answering. Not only were you insecure about the whole thing, but this was also Dutch here.

-You eventually were conned into telling him, Dutch using all his pretty words into making you cave. You were ashamed that he wouldn't want you here because you couldn't basically do anything without your glasses.

-But Dutch seemed to find you more endearing, like a fragile flower.

-He doesn't bring your glasses up again, acting like they aren't even there for the sake of your self-esteem. However, you can catch him staring at some points, like you were a deer who would bolt if he dare made a move.

-But not words were ever brought up by anyone ever. He made sure of that, and he made sure to give you some books now and again to keep a smile on your face.

Micah Bell

-We all know that Micah would be an absolute asshole at first. He may be a bit "softer" on the women, but he picks out anything he sees as a weakness and attacks. Some others know about your glasses, but when they notice that he notices, they get worried.

-He practically snatches them from your face, causing you to shriek as he examines them with a squint in his eyes.

-Your sudden fear is what shocks him the most, not understanding why losing (what he considers) such a stupid trinket would cause you to panic. When you tell him that you can't see, he gives them back to you as you scramble to put them on. Of course, he makes a sly comment.

-Did he give them back to you out of pity? Fear of getting Dutch on his ass? Something else? Micah himself didn't really know. All he did know is that your eyesight was very poor, which is why you never went out on any missions.

-It takes a couple days, but he eventually works up the stomach to apologize to you. It's forced and not very convincing, but it was enough to get you to admit why you freaked out, confirming what he thought.

-It was a weird conversation to have with him because Micah never seemed like a caring type. But then, after a moment, he asked if they really worked, so you offered to have him try them on. This was the one time that you seemed to smile with him, especially when he said he was more blind with them on.

-He may tease you from time to time, raising your insecurities somewhat. But eventually, the nickname "four eyes" became something of a term of endearment. In the end, he actually offers to teach you how to shoot.

Sean Macguire

-Sean is the most endearing little bean that makes everyone smile. He is probably the only one who makes you forget about your insecurities because he is so good at making you laugh and feeling like you are special.

-But he's also someone who won't leave you alone when he becomes interested in something. So when he sees your glasses, he's glued to you.

-Sean's instincts tell him to compliment you because your a woman, but his childish curiosity tells him to ask about your glasses. So, he does both at the same time. Telling you how pretty you look with your glasses.

-Of course, this leaves you as a flustered mess, so you eventually tell him that they aren't there for show but rather you need them to see because you are practically blind without them. Sean doesn't really understand and takes the glasses from your face to look at them.

-Sensing your worry, he puts them on his own face and jokingly asks if their magic and will help him read better. His goal to make you giggle is a success, so he hands your lifeline back to you.

-Sean sees himself as the only one who gets permission to bring up your glasses, so anyone else who does (even if it's an innocent comment) get to face him and his Irish accent stating how no one else but him gets to talk to you like that.

-He's the one who makes you feel better about your glasses, and you love how much he loves to make you smile. Your insecurity is almost nonexistent around him. God bless Sean for being in your life.

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chemicallady · 7 months

Text

I LOVE YOU TO DEATH BUT I'M DROWING

Part 1; Part 2

Couple: noah sebastian x fem!reader

Content Warning: sex, bondage/shibari content, oral sex (fem receiver), male masturbation.

Taglist: @lilhobgobbler ; @aprosiacperson

Summary: you will find out that maybe you don't want to face the consequences of your decisions.

A/N: as always, I want to remark that I don't know Noah Sebastian and this is a 100% work of fiction! I'm not really good in writing smut, but i hope this is at least decent. I'm not into bondage or shibari so I took some time to read about. According to the math I did, this series should be 6 chapter long! Enjoy this chapter and be aware that my chat is always open to talk with you!

Enjoy

《 In Japan, the act of binding is part of the daily routine. Traditional clothes dont have zippers or buttons; the sacred areas of temples is outlined with ropes. The katana's handle is made with a ribbon tied and woven.》

It's surprising how talkative Noan can be when the topic is something he's into. Usually he'd rather spend his spare time during tour working on the next gig. Apparently, today he is more confortable in spending time with you.

He sits on the edge of the bed of the room he should share with Nicholas, but the bass player is nowhere to be found. And that's a good thing because you're undressing. Slowly, as he has asked you a couple of minutes early.

You have no idea of what is going on precisely, but Noah swore that it's not gonna be painful in any way.

《 Have you learnt how to do the knots by yourself?》 You ask, unbutton your jeans and taking them off, along with the tshirt you were wearing. He doesnt bother to answer and this is an habit of him that you can bearly tollerate. Without complaing - it'd useless with Noah- you sit next to him on the bed, only in your panties and bra. You obliged his request and chose something red and now you're noticing that is also the color of the ropes he is sliding in his hands. You can only bite your bottom lip and wait for something. Anything. But Noah seems to be hesitant, looking far from you. Immidiatly, you feel that something is off and the only way out is to open your mounth and say something stupid.

《 Do I have to sign a conctact now, Mr Grey, or we can be good with a word of mouth?》

He chuckles softly, like it's hard for him to keep the mask on and be that serious. 《 This is between us》 , he remarks, grabbing your hand on your left thigh. You squeeze it a bit, before inhale deeply. 《 No need to be so tense. We're going to start with something 'easy', today. If you are going to like it, we can continue.... another day with something rougher.》

《 So you're not gonna hang me to the ceiling like a chandeleer?》 , you pretend to be disappointed while you smile almost shyly to him. 《 Do you want me to fully undress ?》

《 No, it's not necessary.》

Someway, somehow, you feel a little relieved. Not the you feel ashamed in being naked in front of him after what you guys have already done. But the room is quiet, the light is on and bright and he can see you for real, now. Without a mirror in a dark room. He can actually see all of you and he seems pleased. You can feel his eyes caressing every exposed inch of your skin. All you want now is to put your hands on him and take away his clothes as well, but your guts are telling you it's not a good idea. He have never said something about what you're allowed to do and what you're not, but since you have no idea of what to do at all, he can take the full lead. Something is telling you that he likes it that way. Even during your rendezvous he was always in control, moving you like a doll while he was fucking you.

Honestly, you also like it this way.

《 Do I have to pick up a safe word?》

Noah rise up, asking you silently to do the same, taking his hand. 《 Do you believe you will need one?》 , he asks just a bit amused, while he's guiding you in the middle of the room. 《 All of this is based on trust, (y/n). If you don't feel okay with the game, we should stop before you get hurt.》

《 You told me it's safe, are you a liar in your own game??》. You don't want to stop. Not now that he is close to you. Not now that his eyes are hypnotizing you. You almost feel the hurge of being touch by these hands, by his lips....

There is nothing you've ever desired more.

《 I'm, sometimes. A liar.》 , he answers. 《 But I'm really serious now. You don't need a safe word because you can just ask me to stop anytime. It's not gonna be chaotic and I'm gonna turn into an animal. We can go slow or fast, as you feel confortable. 》 You nod, but he immediatly scrolls you. 《 I need you to tell me you got it.》

《 I got it, Noah 》 , you speak up. It's really weird the way he's taking the situatuon serious.

《 Turn around, then 》.

You oblige the first command and a rope fall on your chest, passing under your arm, around you till the tailbone. Another one follows and Noah is quick in braiding them around your collarbone. Your neck is free from any bond and it gives you a nice feeling. Noah works around you keeping the focus on your body for minutes and minutes while you try to stay still, switch the weight from one foot to the other with slow moves. Noah warned you: you must he patient. It takes time. The mirror of the closet gives you a peak of what is going on: the red ropes are now on your chest and back, down to your hips. Noah kneels to close the knots on your thighs and you can feel your arousal increase. The room is eletric now, but also quiet. It's the strangest mix of feeling you have ever experimented: the fascination of the unknow, the constriction of the ropes, the quiet atmosphere, the attention to details. The desire to be fucked to tears. You get what Noah was saying about the pleasure of waiting. It's running under your skin, the desire to be hold in his arms, the feeling of his dick thrusting in you.

But instead you get soft kisses on your lower belly, were the ropes meet the edge of your panties. You can't hold a moan, realising that your hands are still free. You thought, when you agree to all of this, that those will be the first to be tied up. Instead, you can run your fingers on his face softly. You fight the urgency of having more and gently, caress his face, while he looks up to you.

Since he's not complaining, you put your thumb on his lower lip, feeling the tip of his toungue touching your skin lightly.

《 you're so beautiful 》. It's just a whisper, but you cant keep this for yourself. Noah is perfect; every move he makes, every gazes, every touch. Everything is in harmony.

《 this is the first time you're having sex like this, right?》 He askes, bringing his lips on your inner thigh to caress it as well while you're shivering.

《 It's doesnt seem like we are having sex, now.》

《 ... No?》 You feel like you have said the wrong thing. 《 Move your bra to the side, then.》

You frown your forehaed for a second before doing as it asked. You try to pull your bra as much as possible to the side to free your nipples. Just a soft shade of pink colors your cheeks, but youre too pridefull to take a step back. Noah moves his hand on a couple of ropes, the ones who are drawing nice lines on your stomac and in a blink those are touching your nipples. The feeling of your sensible spot teased by red raw ropes makes you jolt.

Noah lowers his head again, placing a kiss on your core, still covered by your -now - soaked panties. You're waiting for a sassy comment from him about how wet You're already, but it didn't come. Noah guides a finger along the line of your fold, making you sight.

《 You cant keep your cool anymore, (y/n)?》 Here we go. You were waiting for him to say something. In an unfair move, he takes away from you any chance of a smart reply. Your panties slides to the side and his mounth is there now, where you have dreamt it to be everynight you were touching yourself thinking about Noah. In the second your back arched, you feel the ropes get tigher on your nipples, creating an addictive friction that makes you moan louder. Your hand run to cover your mouth while Noah is too concentrate in give you pleasure to ask you to be quiet. His eyes are pointed on your face, when his long fingers start to enter in you, searching for the right spot to give you as much pleasure as possible.

He was right, someway, this is a way to make sex. You can feel him all over your body, every inch that is touched by a rope is an extention of Noah's hands, lips, mind. Every knot is meticulously done to recreate a net that helps you to stay in place while he is working on you with that malicious tounge he has. In the moment he reaches you clit you can already feel the warmness of the orgasm agitate your guts. Your hands find their own place; one on his solid shoulder and the other in his hair, that you try so hard to not pull, but when it happens,just pays you back with a moan at the center of your core.

The room is filled with the scent of your sex overstimulated, the sound of your moans and his dancing togheter in the air and the wet of his mouth on you. It doesn't take so much for you to cum, the first time.

Noah decides that he won't let you go before you have reach the peak of pleasure other three times. Collapsed on the bed, you feel like all the strength was eradicated from your shaking body. Noah, on the top of you, is just touching himself. Your eyes never met since he started, but if you were able to put the shame aside, he has too. Your shaking arm lifts and with a caress on his cheek, you ask him to look you in the eyes while his hand gives himself pleasure.

And surprisingly, he oblige this request.

His dark, sharp eyes are glued to yours. Every moan and slight he realises make your legs to shake a bit harder and you feel like your body just turned in a bundle of uncovered nevers.

Your hand traces a rail on his jaw and neck, falling on his chest covered in sweat, under his tank top. Even if he is still fully dressed, with just is erection exposed, you find him perfect.

《 ( y/n) ....》

Your name sounds like music on his lips. He's close, you can tell by the way his body tenses. 《 Come on me, Noah.... 》 you whisper in return, lifting his tank top so you can touch his stomach and sides. Instinctively, you open your legs under him, feeling the ropes tighter on your thighs. And is probably this motion along with your skin red because of the friction that lead Noah to his orgasm. Warm withe stripes of pleasure fall on your belly before Noah decides to kneel between your legs, cleaning his hand on the sheets.

You cant take your eyes off his figure, while he reach his phone on the bed table. 《 can I...?》

His breath is still short while he asks you to be part of his collection. You don't reply immediately. 《 You're not going to show it to the others later, right?》

《 No. This is mine.》

《 Jesus Christ Noah》 you try to hide your face with your hand. 《 Don't say that unless you're going to fuck me, please.》

You surprise him and your cheeks are not the only one to flush. 《 Maybe next time...?》

It's realiving, the fact that in his mind there is a next time. 《Then take the picture.》

After he is done with the phone, he bends on you and for a second, a small second, you hope is for a kiss. But is not. He simply starts to free you from the ropes, caressing the bruises in case any has formed. Then he hands you a tissue to clean yourself.

The placid quiet now turned into an awkward silence.

You start to recollect your clothes, a bit annoyed by the sticky in your panties. You can now leave like nothing happen and face Noah every day with this awkward feeling among the two of you or you can try to do something to solve the problem in the beginning.

《 Noah, I was thinking...》 you say while sitting next to him, putting your shoes on. 《 its past dinner time and I'm hungry... do you wanna go somewhere and grab a bite?》

Two scenarios born in your mind: sassy!Noah telling you that he already eaten enough of you or shy!Noah not speaking at all.

That's the reason why you feel so surprised when Noah nods, replying you that Matt told him about a place 24/7 open nearby the hotel.

Like a perfect normal person.

So this lead to scenarios number 3: no attitude at all.

You're not preparare for this.

You're not prepared to face no consequences for your actions.

You're not prepared for him to be cold.

#noah sebastian #bad omens #noah sebastian imagine #noah sebastian x reader #bad omens imagine

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cupoftaae · 1 year

Note

also could you write one where tae and y/n had a small fight before a party, but they still decide to go, then y/n drinks way too much bc of the fight, and then taehyung takes care of her and they make up the next morning or smth like thatt 😊 I love your writing!🫶🏻

OOO I love me some angst, *rubs hands together*

Thank for the suggestion, and thank you for reading my writing, it means a lot to me anon <3

word count- 2.1k

warnings- alcohol consumption, body image issues, a fight and some yelling/swearing. wicked hangover and mention of vomit.

Enjoy!!

"I dont understand why you are freaking out, y/n. You look fine"

Taehyung sat on the end of your bed while you stood in the bathroom, rambling about yourself. "because, we are already late and im not really in the mood to go to this party. I hate the way I look in this dress, nothing is working out" you exhale, a tear falling down your cheek as you attempt to curl your hair.

Both of you were getting ready to go to Yoongi and his girlfriend's engagement party, something that has been in the works for months and is finally happening.

You knew you were already a half an hour late, which looks bad not only for tae, but you too, considering you and Yoongi's girlfriend, Jihyo, were friends.

"then just stay home" he shrugged, standing to go lean against the doorframe to the bathroom.

"oh yeah just that easy, let me miss my friends party" you sarcastically spoke. "bet you would like that, to go alone because you are so ashamed of me" you went on, spraying hairspray.

Taehyung ran his hands over his face. He loves you, he really does, but its impossible to convince you to see the bright side of things when you got in your head like this.

you slammed down the can of hairspray and stormed out of the bathroom, bumping into taehyung on the way out. "you are being way too dramatic right now, its not a big deal." he sternly spoke, turning his entire body to watch you rummage through your shared closet.

you stood and looked back, "oh okay" you laughed sarcastically. "you are a man, you dont have to think about yourself the way I do" you huff and walk towards the mirror.

"im tired of looking like this, I want to just be able to put something on and feel beautiful for once" you whisper while running your hands over the front of your dress.

"I think you look sexy" taehyung mindlessly shrugged, making you scoff. "God, thats all you think about, huh?" you shot back.

"What? no-"

"lately you've been incredibly invalidating of how I feel and i'm sick of it"

"How the fuck am I invalidating? Im trying to help, Y/N!!"

"no, you arent. you think you are, but you dismiss what I say, every time I fucking open my mouth Taehyung." you yell, grabbing your purse and walking to the door as your boyfriend followed.

"fine then I will just not talk" he mumbled, making you roll your eyes at his childish behavior. "Yeah, you do that. In fact, dont talk to me all night." you mutter and turn to head for the car, leaving taehyung to follow.

He didnt mean to upset you, he really didnt. He just doesnt understand what you couldnt like about yourself. Perhaps there were better ways to approach you regarding this topic, but right now, the priority was at least showing up to the party before yoongi or Jihyo gets upset.

The car ride remained silent the entire time Taehyung drove. You looked out the window and had slapped his hand away the moment he tried to reach out and squeeze your leg lovingly.

He just doesnt get it, he doesnt understand how you feel, and its not like you can talk it out with him because he always shoots back some fucking stupid line thats is supposedly trying to make you "feel better". Its getting old, and the only thing you wanted to do right now was be away from your boyfriend.

Once you both had arrived at the party, Taehyung parked the car along the curb with the other guests vehicles. You hopped out the moment the car came to a stop, practically skipping inside and leaving him in the dust. He scoffed and locked the car, getting out and walking in at his own pace.

"Y/N!" Jihyo smiled and ran over once she saw you inside her home.

You pushed through some of the guests and made your way over to your friend, hugging her affectionately. "Hi, congratulations! im sorry Im late" you pout and pull away to see her. "No worries love, is taehyung coming too?" she asks, pulling you into the kitchen.

"mhm...unfortunately" you laugh and grab a cracker off the snack plate. "unfortunately?" Jihyo smiles and nudges you. "yeah. We had a fight before we got here" you whisper to her, eyes darting to see Taehyung walk into the living room with a wide boxy smile as he greeted everyone.

"Ohhh.." she nods, understanding. "Im sorry, hun" she rubs your arm. "its ok, I just need alcohol." you joke, making her laugh as she dragged you into Yoongi's wine room, something he was immensely proud (and pretentious) of.

"I think he wont mind If we use this one" Jihyo spoke, reaching for the top bottle and bringing it back into the kitchen for the both of you.

"Taehyung!!" Yoongi cheered, walking back downstairs to see his friend standing in the living room. He hands him a bottle of beer and hugs him.

"Hyung! Congrats again, you and Jihyo have a very lovely home. Its changed so much since last July when I visited." He smiled, thanking him for the beer as they engaged in conversation. "Thank you, we renovated the kitchen and expanded it, wanna see?" he asked with excitement, tae nodded, following him.

"yeah so then I came home and he just kind of blurted it out, it was really sweet and intimate, I actually preferred it over a public proposal." you watched as your friend refilled your glass, telling you the story of how Yoongi proposed.

"ah, Jihyo thats so sweet" you put your hand over your chest, taking another sip as you lean against the counter. "I hope I get to experience that"

"taehyung is a sweet guy, i have no doubts he will pull out all the stops for you" she smiled

"hm?" taehyung mummers, walking in and hearing his name.

your eyes dart open, mad he had found you. "yoongi!" you walk over and hug him, congratulating him.

"Y/n! its nice to see you again, been way too long" he laughed and patted your back. "do you like the kitchen? he cuts, Taehyung watching as you sip on your wine.

"its lovely!!"

"indeed" taehyung adds on, stepping in front of yoongi to stand behind you.

"hes always talking about his kitchen" Jihyo giggled and walked up to her fiance, hugging him. "well yeah it was a lot of work" he shrugged and laughed

you smile as you watch them both be cute little shits, reluctantly turning when you feel your boyfriends hand tickling your lower back. "what??" you bit, making his hands raise in defense.

"youre still mad?....baby..cmon" he whined, trying to pull you into his embrace but you step back and leave the kitchen, going to have fun with the other guests in the living room.

yoongi pulls away from his soon to be wife and raises his eyebrows, full of questions. "they had a fight" jihyo giggled and patted his chest, walking out of the room as well.

"ah jihyo, wait" Taehyung runs up, whispering

"hm?" she turns

"make sure she doesnt drink too much, please?" he asked with serious eyes, making her nod. "shes a big girl, I think she will be okay but yes, ill keep an eye on her" she smiled

"thank you, shes not usually a drinker but tends to overdo it sometimes when shes angry..."he spoke, laughing a bit at the end.

Jihyo giggled, "gotcha"

he looked over at you hugging your friend and dancing slightly. you looked so beautiful and all he wanted to do was wrap you up in his arms and kiss you, but he couldn't. He needed to apologize for hurting your feelings, but there was no way you would even let him go near you to do so.

He sighed and sat down, accepting another beer as he silently ate chips.

"IM A GROWN WOMAN, I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT!!!!" you slurr-sing as you and your friend Chae sing along to karaoke after having a few drinks.

most of the guests had left, and it was nearing midnight, so the remaining party-goers were you, Taehyung, Chae, namjoon and Jungkook.

Taehyung was ready to tap out. He was exhausted, and didnt think he was going to be here this long. The only reason he still is, is well, you. He sat on the couch between yoongi and jungkook, fighting sleep as he watched you let loose with your friends.

You still hadnt talked to him for the majority of the party, but somewhere deep down he was actually glad to see you happy for the first time today.

Jihyo giggled and ran back downstairs as she watched them sing, sitting next to yoongi. He sternly looked at her, "what did she drink?" he asked, taehyung leaning over to look at jihyo as well.

She smiled and mumbled, "some wine..."

yoongi sat up "what wine?"

"your....wine..."she tried not to giggle as taehyung glared. "I told you to not let her drin-" taehyung was cut off as you ran over and sat on him.

He blushed and lightly placed his hands around you, "you ok?" he asked, "im tired" you yell, meaning to whisper but failing to do so.

"okay baby...you wanna go home? good job singing by the way"

you sat up immediately and crossed your arms. "im supposed to be mad at you" you slurred, turning to walk away but stumbling and almost falling, "be careful!" tae spoke, jumping up.

"Ill be whatever I want!" you bite back.

"i think we are gonna go, im sorry guys" tae spoke, holding you up by your arm.

"nono dont apologize please, its late and you guys stayed long enough" yoongi laughed, "yes go take care of y/n, shes gonna feel that tomorrow im sure"

Tae smiled and picked you up gently, managing to get you into the car outside without a fight.

"we are going home now ok?" he whispers as he drives safely down the street. you dont talk, rather mumble in response to everything. Once you are outside your apartment, he holds you up the stairs as he puts his key into the door.

"uehhhh" you whine and pull away, leaning off the railing and suddenly throwing up. "oh!" tae drops his key and runs over, rubbing your back and pushing your hair out of the way until you were done.

"im never drinking again" you slur and fall against him. "i know baby" he consoles, picking his key up and getting you inside to help clean you up and get into bed.

Once he managed to get you into the bathroom, he carefully put you on top of the counter as he changed you into you pajamas. you remained staring with a mean glare, making him laugh.

"what?" he smiled and put one of his old tshirts over your head and onto your body.

"Im mad at you"

"ok...we can talk about it tomorrow ok?" he sighed and washed your face with a cloth before ushering you into bed. he placed Tylenol and water on the bedside table and got close to you, beginning to talk but realizing you were already asleep.

he smiled and cuddled into you, falling asleep eventually.

The next morning, Taehyung was awoken by the sounds of you throwing up in the bathroom. He rushed out of bed to be by your side, knowing how much you hated getting sick.

"you ok, baby?" he whispers, watching you lean back against him on the bathroom floor, groaning.

"I shouldnt have drank so much"

he hums and runs his hand through your hair, kissing your head.

its silent for a moment.

"Im sorry for being such a dick yesterday, it was wrong and I should have been more understanding"

you grab his hand with yours, shaking your head. "its ok, I was also being irrational and mean. you are a good boyfriend, tae" you closed your eyes and breathed deeply, feeling lingering nausea.

"I love you" he spoke

"I love you too" you managed to smile.

"no more fighting?"

"no more fighting" you nodded.

he kissed your hand. "if we ever get into another fight just know I have you singing beyonce at the party on video, blackmail for days"

you whipped around, "no...."

"yes...."

"I will cut your dick off if you do that, watch it, kim" you glare, making him laugh. "now get out, before I puke on you"

#taehyung smut #taehyung #kim taehyung #taehyung fanfic #taehyung fluff #kim taehyung fanfic #bts fluff #bts smut #bts #bts fanfic #bts x reader #bts v #tae x reader #taehyung drabble #tae fic #tae drabble #tae fluff #tae smut #taehyung series

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meetthesillymedicmain · 7 hours

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longfic idea

So I was listening to Lana and Brooklyn Baby came on and while I was thinking about the lyrics I was like holy shit I could totally make a fic out of this!!

You can steal this idea or whatever, Im not gonna write it cause Im already writing other fics.

Boston Baby, a Medic/Scout slowburn fic about Scout, whos trying to learn guitar, goes to Medic after his wrist starts hurting. When he tells him about wanting to learn guitar, Medic is intrigued, and wants to learn along with Scout, thinking it would be a breeze to learn since he can already play the violin.

After a while of going to Medic once a week to practice, he arrives this day at an empty infirmary and snoops around, finding that Medic is a poet. Scout wonders if they could ever make music together using these, since he thought they were really thought out. Medic arrives lates, and Scout takes a few of the pages before he entered with him. They practice guitar yada yada and Scout comes out feeling great about the time they spent together

The whole thing falls apart whenever he realizes that he might like the medic, not only in denial of being gay but also ashamed because the dude is like over 2 times his age. This results in him hiding his feelings from Medic and himself, and no longer able to sit by himself without needing to occupy his head with other shit so he doesnt have to think about his feelings.

Weeks go by and theyve both progressed, now able to play a couple simple songs together, and alls cool until Scout accidentally mentions the poetry Medic does, and he gets a little angry at Scout that he's been not just stealing his shit, but also snooping around when he wasnt here. Instead of leaving peacefully that day, he's sent out by the frustrated man and left to overthink, and feel even more guilty about his growing crush on him.

He comes over next week, but not to practice. He couldn't anyway, since Medic didnt set up the infirmary this time, but he arrives and annoys Medic a little as he makes an awful attempt at apologising. Medic, despite finding the apology stupid, is at least moved knowing that Scout feels bad for what he did. They hung out there for a while, much longer than their guitar sessions lasted, and it eventually came the time for Medic to feed his birds. Upon letting them out, one of them decided to be a jerk and sit on Scouts head. When they finally got the bird off, Scout says goodbye for the night and whenever he leaves he runs his hand through his hair, picking up a feather that the bird left.

Thats sort of all I had right now. If anyone wants to write this and improvise the rest, that would be so fucking cool. I dont see enough of this pair, and I think it'd be a really sweet read.

#team fortress 2 #tf2 #fanfiction #medicscout #blunt trauma #mediscout #fanfic ideas #writing ideas #tf2 scout #tf2 medic

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decaydanceredacted · 3 months

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OKAYYY hi its me again. i j ust sent the one abt not very sexually tying up mr andrew john hurley im still thinking btu that deserved its own redacted so these r going here. after ive untied him and hes had a minute to chill he would like immediately take complete control over the situation. telling me to get on my knees and not look at him or speak without permission. that ive had my fill of admiring him and now its his turn. i didnt really think i had any power here, did i? because thatd be pathetic. theres no possible way someone as stupid as me would be able to do anything to him if he didnt let me. i even needed his help with getting him in the right position! i dont know annnything. all im really good for is worshiping him. obviously. all of this he points out. a lot. he doesnt hit me (even though im obviously aching for it. which he mentions.) he just grabs me by the hair and drags me over to the bed. or the couch. whichever is closest. he tells me im allowed to look at him now and that i have 10 minutes to get him off and if i manage it maybe he'll let me come. i do my absolute best (read: a very purposefully shitty job) to suck him off but im not properly pleasuring him, so he fists his hand in my hair and fucks my face how he wants. and i let him. because im made for it. he doesnt come, though. he holds himself off for the 10 minutes and looks at me all disappointed. im not even any good at the thing i was made for! if i cant even suck him off, whats the point of him keeping me around? i should really be ashamed. and now i dont even get to get off! what a poor thing i am. ok im not thinking abt this part as hard bcuz idrc but it feels obligatory. he bends me over on the floor and fucks me with as little prep as possible (but its okay, im practically dripping wet just from being face fucked! bcuz im a whore.) and puts basically zero thought into my pleasure, focusing on getting himself off as quick as possible. he pulls out before he comes (because i dont deserve it) and paints my back all sticky-white. i didnt realise how long this was getting but discord stopped letting me type it there bcuz its too long so im ending now. after hes cleaned me off and kissed away my tears we cuddle up in bed and fall asleep together mimimi the end

#ah #i think this qualifies as an #extra long redacted

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love-now-cry-later · 8 months

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the importance of change

"nothing lasts forever, nothing stays the same"

september 3, 2023

I'm at a point in life where everything is changing and for the first time… I'm ok with it. I just turned 18 (woo!) and for the first year since i was 12 i didn't have a breakdown on my birthday. i graduated just before that and now i'm off. in 1 month i'll be in maine for a concert with my best friend, then i'll be in GA with my mom and then i'll be back in jersey until christmas where i’ll then go to nebraska for a bit and then costa rica from january to july, and when we come back my friend Abbi will be graduating and we all will have had enough saved up to rent a house together. And My dad asked me this morning if I was scared and I've just sat here thinking. What do I feel?

i'm about to spend the next year of my life traveling and seeing the world. having opportunities, that i'm eternally grateful for, that many people don't have and my family never had. I have a chance of moving out and getting my own home and for my family, generations in one home, that's really big. I'm young and free and I'm grateful to have friends who give me opportunities that I would never have otherwise.

But It's terrifying. I'm gonna be far from home for a long time and when i'm finally back it won't be for long, but you know what's scarier? everything staying the same.

my life has gotten easier these last few months. my senior year, I graduated because I have connections with teachers and principals and people like me. my 'charisma' as Camdyn puts it. I have opportunities like Costa Rica because friends and their families like me. My life has gotten easier and I don't take that for granted. In some ways I believe the easy, go-with-the-flow, handouts and kindness that I've been receiving is an apology from the universe. An apology for having to be strong and grow up at a very young age. An apology for all that i had to deal with very young, and a reward for not letting it turn me into a person i would be ashamed of. Coming out of it a better person.

I believe that I was meant to break generational cycles. The cycles of poverty- the cycles of teen pregnancy- the cycles of throwing your life away. The cycles of dead end office jobs, janitorial positions- of deciding between a meal for you or your kids tonight. The grab the wic approved!- dirty looks in the grocery line because of the ebt card. I believe it’s gotten easier because I deserve an easier life than my mother and my father. Not that they dont deserve it either, But i can tell they’re happy that i have better, i think thats what they've always wanted for me. Even though they didn’t necessarily provide it, they're happy for me. I can tell.

My point- or the point of this ramble at least is that change is scary but you know what- that's good. Fear is good sometimes! It’s like when you first start highschool and you're scared, there's a new building and its so big and there's so many people you’ve never met and people you never will, but after a couple weeks freshman year is easy- then it’s winter break and spring break, and then- you're a sophomore. I was terrified to graduate, but I'm so grateful and happy I did. Because you know what's more scary and embarrassing than standing in front of hundreds of people that dont like you, and an ex and their new gf in a stupid cap and gown, and possibly falling on your face walking off the stage? Not doing it. Letting yourself give up and fail out of fear. The great thing about life is that you can change at any point. Anything you're unhappy with you can change, And isn't that beautiful?

The thing is that, I've really looked at my life and gotten more perspective and I need more change. “The way im living is a temper tantrum” and not in the way it was before, where i was drinking myself into oblivion for some nihilistic ‘fuck you’ to the man or god or whatver. But in the way that i’ve kept myself in a box so to be what others want me to be. I’m done with the edgy-tryhard - anti feminine hard ass-intimidating bullshit image i’ve tried to spin my whole life. I'm surrendering. Surrendering to the divine feminine, to the easy, happy, beautiful universe. I'm ready to begin the easiest, happiest era of my life. An era of receiving.

Anyway, I hope to all that read this that you will experience freedom, and happiness as we’re all entitled to. Asé

#self help #rambles #brain dump #spiritualgrowth #growth mindset #growth #journal

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penguin--person · 1 month

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16 and 24 for Kozlov

31 for nastya

The characters are more suggestions!! Be free do what you want 🤩💥

ty for the ask!! ask game

16. What kinds of people do they have arguments with in their head? everybody on the planet of earth ever 💥💥gabriela, probably? i don't think their relationship is Awesome No Worries.. so sad! but in general - people that think they know better than him, i guess .. or are just mean to him

24. Did they take a cookie from the cookie jar? What kind of cookie was it? i think this question is referencing something but im not sure what sorry .. i think he'd like cookies with fillings:) or those cookies that go with coffee

gonna put the nastya one under cut bc its big

31. When do they feel the most guilt? How do they respond to it? Wowww you give kozlov easy questions but you want nastya to DIE!!!!! as it ought to be 🫡god i have to think a lot about this one.. killing me too generally she feels guilty for being a mutant, for bad grades, for not being good enough, that kinda stuff - but even then, its not really guilt? its more like shame.

with specific actions.. tbh i don't think she feels that much guilt outside of things concerning her? when she stabs dasha, she wont feel guilty bc, in her eyes, it was self defense and dasha deserved it. no reason to feel guilty. being mean to zhenya and those 'lesser than her' is fine because shes better than them, she can do whatever she wants. this is no reason to feel guilty. in the au where she grows into a scientist, she doesnt feel guilty much then either - just ! depressed. stupid. angry at her younger self for throwing herself at the facility. ashamed. not guilty because its not her fault. its 13 year old nastya's fault.

as to how she responds to guilt - like to any other emotions she deems negative, bottle that thang up!!!!!! express it through anger and frustration at those lesser than her and suck up to those better than her for love, for forgiveness!!!! yeahhhh!!! thats how she responds externally💥💥💥internally she's just.. idk man shes a freakkkk i dont know what you want me to say ... this is kinda explored in her nastyura fic !! how she reacts there is how she reacts at her worst.. its like, it depends a lot on how shes feeling in the moment. she Will blame you most of the time. she wont always try to stab you. she wont always yell at you, she might just go "Uhhh who cares?? Lol" or just laugh at you. shes just a goofff

#ask #kozlovcore #nastyacore #i think its funny when people fall for nastyas mask .. yea shes mean and shit. but she hasnt said anything thatd get her to hell i think #also shes a kid (in like 99% of her aus) so i think she should be forgiven everything in her life ever Ok #same goes for dasha and everyone else ever to be clear #THE LGBTQ COMMUNITY FORGIVES DASHA AND NASTYA ❤️

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transenbyconfessions · 1 year

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TW for menstruation.

I've been giving more thought to all the small things that weren't obviously signs that I may be non-binary that I've felt since I was very young and consistently held. I never had the language for how I felt back then. Realising how some of what I thought and felt probably had a bit of dysphoria along with the other reasons, is comforting but also sad.

The main one for me, who was AFAB, was they ever since I was young I never wanted children. It was something I was very, very clear about. But as this was primary school it was put down as that I was just a child and all girls grow up to have babies so you'll meet a man and change your mind. I'm 39 now, I still do not want children. I know a lot of my reasons are because I simply don't want to, it would cause me some physical problems, I couldn't afford to anyway but what I didn't realise as a child because I found, and still find expressing my feelings difficult, is that the whole idea disgusts me. I'd be changing in a way that I don't want. I hated it when I started my period because even although we had been told all about that at school, I never really connected that also included me. And when they did show up, Mum got all weird about it. I didn't understand why she got so proud and at the same time, ashamed enough that she just gave me these awful pads and not told what to do with them or how to look after myself. The whole teenage female experience and growing up into a woman wasn't something I ever connected with. It was a performance because I have a certain body that is capable of certain things. As a girl, as a woman in order to be accepted you should dress a certain way, behave a certain way. I didn't hate my body but I never felt comfortable in it, not entirely.

As I joined the military, I loved the gym. I worked out, tried to gain muscle as much, as I could. But I was way more feminine because the other women were, the women's uniform trousers were so stupid and I wasn't big enough to get the much smarter men's ones. I wanted to fit in. I cut my hair short but people always mistook me for a man in a nasty mocking way. Weird as it sounds, when I deployed and a local man addressed me with none of that, I wasn't upset because what he saw was a person with short hair, my chest hidden under my baggy shirt. It always upset me when people were snide and I wasn't even trying to pretend I was a man, I was just being myself. I dont suit long hair anyway!

Workouts almost became a bit of an obsession. It wasn't just about being fit for the work but with how I looked and I guess that was a bit of dysphoria I wasn't aware of because I didn't want a typical feminine shape.

I left, returned to civilian life and because I no longer felt the need to fit in with everybody else, I slowly dressed less feminine. I still wear some things but that's because I want to. It's just being me not presenting in a way I think others will accept. I thought about how I identified and that I never really felt like male or female fit or described me. I never had a sense of what it meant to be a woman. But neither can I say the same for man. I like being free with dressing in a way I like regardless of how masculine or feminine it is. I do think about if top surgery would be a good thing for me, just family would have a problem with it. I don't know if I'd go on T, I got used to the fact that I have periods. But I have short hair and nobody mocks me for it or say snide things about it. In fact if people can't tell which I am, that makes me happy. That's sometimes the point; I don't want to be viewed as either. I use they/them pronouns. I want to change my name to a non-feminine one. Being seen and accepted as a non-binary person means the world to me.

It took me so long to understand but I finally feel like I know and feel more at home with myself simply for understanding why I felt the way I did when people probably knew bit didn't want to face that they don't have a daughter but still a loving child.

#menstruation #transgender #trans #enby #nb #nonbinary #non-binary #non binary #dysphoria #gender dysphoria #childfree #military

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