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mysoullanguage · 1 year

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#0015 your north & south nodes

aries nn/libra sn - action, confidence, selfishness

independence and self-awareness will be key topics and lessons for you in this lifetime. in your past, you may have had relationships in which you deluded yourself into thinking that you are complete when with someone else. you neglected your individuality and thereby bred a mentality that depended on others' opinions, feelings, and judgment too much, you became obsessed with compromising for others, rather than yourself. one gift of yours is that you know how to love someone and make them feel loved, according to your past life experience with partners. however, this build-up of impatience to give others love should first become redirected unto you, so that you can love yourself first before you love others. the concept of loving yourself and being your own supporter/guide may be a foreign idea, but it is the ultimate truth... once you start providing yourself with love and care, you can do so to others, but in a way that is healthy, co-dependent, or overly attached.

in your last life, you may have depended on others for what you should do/how you should feel. you feel out of balance when you don't submit to other people because, by nature, you are a people pleaser. you are ready to let people walk over you in hopes of getting their approval or respect... or simply because you don't want confrontation, or maybe because you want to be nice. not everyone is going to appreciate your kindness and, in fact, will actually use your kindness to their advantage. in this lifetime, you must establish your own identity instead of relying on what other people think of you; you must establish personal boundaries of "no", "maybe another time", "i don't like how that made me feel", etc. to build a foundation and a clear border of respect between you and others. you must, in this life, learn to take action and direct yourself instead of waiting for others. you do not live your life for others, and this is what your karma for this lifetime will teach you

you must be ready to love and nurture yourself if you want to have healthy relationships with others. if you have ever been in a relationship before, your identity may have revolved around theirs, or your identity was very wishy-washy and there was no clear sign of individuality coming from you. you may have questioned who you are numerous times and have tried discovering yourself. meditation, journalling, and personal reflection will be of great help to you, as you must be readily available to establish who you are now and what you want to be.

you must learn how to set boundaries with others and more about self-discipline. you tend to feel imbalanced when you sense something is out of order. this might demotivate you completely. however, through making routines and directing energy through things you enjoy, you will actually cultivate more success. doing things impulsively is not a bad thing but make sure you do it because there is an end goal awaiting you...

your lesson? to learn individuality and eliminate the need to depend on others. learn about yourself first, build your own identity, set routines, and create boundaries that clearly distinguish who you are and what you are ready to tolerate and not. redirect the energy you show others towards yourself and watch yourself attract people that align with your frequency.

taurus nn/scorpio sn - self-esteem, obsession, judgment

your life seems to revolve around the question of your self-worth, obsession, boundaries, and personal values. what do you really think of yourself? are you easily swayed by what others think of you? do you have a strong image of yourself? do you rely on others or are you self-reliant? much of these questions will creep when in personal relationships, as this placement is very much relationship-focused, in the sense that this placement yearns to find a second half. in your past life, your scorpio may have devoted their lives to their spouses and may have been married to people in high power. consequently, you've come to this life with the same intention/motive. scorpio yearns to connect with someone on a deeply sensual and intensely passionate level. you, inevitably, will look for someone with whom you can "vibrate" with; you look for someone who can click with you. you offer loyalty and commitment to others, but not so much for yourself...

learning to be alone will be a key lesson for you, as well as learning the value of your own perception of yourself. there is no need to rely on what others think or what your partner thinks. there is a habit of giving your all to lovers... your loyalty, honesty, but also your individuality, your self-esteem, and self-worth. there is insecurity revolving around yourself and others and you may think you're not good enough for love or not good enough in general.

another lesson for you will revolve around material comfort. in general, you will need to learn a spiritual and material balance and you will need to find comfort in knowing you can spoil yourself materially, as well as retreat to your spiritual fantasy. do not overindulge in either. in your past life, you may have hyperfocused on spiritual escape. you may have used your intense feelings of desire, love, passion, and obsession to feel the "euphoria" of spiritual love. you thought that, through the intensity of passion, lust, and obsession, you truly felt divine, rather than just human.

scorpio has a bad habit of judging and controlling others. both taurus and scorpio have an innate need to micromanage and control what they have no control over because it makes them feel powerful. the idea of powerlessness or loss scares this placement and there needs to be acceptance that not everything can go your way. the idea that you may judge others may actually come from inner insecurities and distrust in others.

your lesson? learn to establish personal boundaries, build your self-esteem, and eliminate the toxicity of obsession, control, and your insecurities. by building a home in your body, you prevent people from taking advantage of you. you no longer feel replaceable by building boundaries and saying "no" to what you don't want. there needs to be a realization that love and good sex are essential but they cannot be your main focus if you do not have a positive self-image built. the presence of a lover will only be temporary satisfaction. by having a positive self-image and self-esteem, you are confident in your worth and what you offer. the missing link between you and your body can cause much loss by you always needing to control, by you judging others, by having no security in your life and body. additionally, learn to spoil yourself to achieve the goal of a happy body, but do not over-splurge.

gemini nn/sagittarius sn - truthfulness, communication, honesty

in your past life, you may have been a loner, an outcast, or typically isolated from the rest of the world. inevitably, this may have caused you to become a nervous wreck, often having social anxiety or trouble communicating with others. in this life, you must learn to adapt to healthy communication, healthy curiosity, and listening to others. your "achilles heal" is your self-righteousness and your need to be right. others seem to not want to connect with you because you seem to always have the answers; you always seem to know the right way. you always try to tell others and show them you are right in some odd attempt to prove your intelligence and validation to them. you want to experience life and you have an insatiable thirst for knowledge but you are totally unwilling to cooperate with others and have your mental challenged. you wish to pursue the truth of life until you start meeting others and realizing your experience is different to theirs and that, really, you are not always right.

you must become open-minded to others and learn from them by listening to their experiences and opinions. in order to truly achieve the knowledge you yearn deeply for, you must accept the fact that people are different everywhere you go. there is no right or wrong way to live. you tend to do things by yourself because you think your way is the right way. this was evident in your past life too, where you usually wandered off on your own to pursue knowledge. your comfort to loneliness would've caused you immense anxiety or communication issues as you try to establish meaningful relationships with others. when you feel undermined or your intelligence tested, you seem to detach completely. you want to appear smart but being smart also requires you to make intellectual mistakes.

you may be the type to talk constantly or deliver your thoughts and messages in a way that is combative and assertive. when you feel your opinions or thoughts are invalidated, you tend to do too much to prove otherwise. you must be open to feedback from others if you want to learn how to properly communicate with others, rather than disregarding their viewpoint because your experience or point of view is different.

there is an obsession with wanting to be free or wanting to be alone, it can cause a lot of strain in your relationships. for example, relationships seem attractive to you until you have that urge to release yourself from it; you may be a superficial person that doesn't like when things get too serious. you think being alone is freedom but you, once again, put yourself in a situation where you are alone with your own company. part of being free means you have freedom of thought and individuality. even if you did feel restricted in a relationship, couldn't you communicate your issue? or do you feel as though you need to have it all figured out? are you afraid of not knowing what's wrong - why do you always need to have it all figured out when nobody else does? these are key questions for you.

you may be very hopeful, but ensure you don't overdo in your faith. "things will work out" for sure, but do not wait for the perfect moment to take action.

your lesson? learn duality and express your opinions and thoughts in a way that is reflective, reciprocating, and curious. become open-minded to the idea that not everyone has lived the same life as you. in order to truly become knowledgeable of life, there must be cooperation with others to know how life really works, because it's not the same for everyone. do not fear connections with others and do not fear commitment. do not think you are restrained by other people, but ensure you can keep your individuality while still working with others. learn to release yourself from the habits of detachment avoidance, and ignorance, and to challenge your mental through other people.

cancer nn/capricorn sn - humility, vulnerability, and intimacy

in your last life, you may have been a person of responsibility and status. capricorn sn would've indicated a cold heart who hid feelings in personal relationships. you may have been distant to others and standoff-ish. you may have the idea that everything had to be hard to be perfect or good, or that in order to be truly successful and happy, you have to work hard. micromanaging and control would've been huge issues in the past and would've inevitably caused you to become controlling and paranoid of imperfection and failure. there is a strong fear of inadequacy that you might muster achievements and material possessions to fill the void of validation within you. in your last life, you became consumed by the idea that money = happiness. you rejected the process and journey and went straight for the money. you did things to appeal strongly and successfully to others. you may have these bad habits now, too.

you must learn to drop the tough and cold act and you must learn to stop trying to control things that cannot be controlled. you do this because it's what's predictable and makes you feel safe, but it's the best way to introduce failure because your paranoia will only attract misfortune. you have the capability of being a nurturing and loving person, but your trust issues and emotional restriction causes you to act otherwise. in this life, you are not built to carry the weight of the world like you did before. you think responsibility and work is what validates you but it is your genuinity and connections with others that build strong self-esteem. learn that nobody can invalidate your feelings. cultivate a strong personality within you immune to others, and you will find yourself living a life less seriously, and more childlike.

what you want from others is to be loved and admired for who you are, but how do you achieve this when you make it so difficult? you must learn how to let others love you by risking vulnerability. not everyone is out to get you, and you must realize this. you can be a loner because you're so used to your own company, you habitually isolate yourself from other people. now, you need to communicate your feelings as they come and honor the gift of intimacy. when you let your feelings bloom freely, you then manifest and attract good connections money won't fulfill.

your lesson? to play the role of a mother rather than a father. what this means is that you must leave the energy of action and financial pursuit to embody someone much more emotional, sensitive, and motherly. this doesn't mean becoming feminine from masculine but allowing yourself the space to breathe. you have an instinct drawn to achievement but it's now your time to take on a much more cooperative role, working with others to build a solid center of feeling. you must accept you cannot control everything, nor can you take responsibility for everything. learn that life works with you, not against you.

leo nn/aquarius sn - ego, confidence, and playfulness

you may have a habit of excessive daydreaming and postponing your plans to wait for more information. this is a very humble placement that will teach you the importance of confrontation, individuality, and childishness. in this lifetime, you are dropping aloofness, fear of confrontation, and detachment. aquarius is a sign that loves to belong and make friends, so much so that aquarius blurs into other people, inevitably losing their own sense of self. there is a strong need to belong and a strong need to build a group or society of some sort but there lies the question of, if you had your perfect friends, would you become them or stay the same as you are? if this part is unhealed or recognized, you may notice that, in your friend groups or with your friends, you tend to become them, whether it be by picking up certain characteristics or opinions or hobbies/habits you normally wouldn't have. suddenly this placement causes you to depend on your friends and others for validation.

this placement will teach you about quality friends, but they will ultimately test you to see if you really are ready to be yourself, despite being in a friend group or having friends with characteristics you may find admirable. having friends close in personality to you is not a bad thing, but it gets out of hand once you start dressing like them, thinking like them, and spending excessive amounts of time together, until you forget what you're like on your own...

you may be the type to feel a passion of creativity and genius rush through you, but your thirst for knowledge often overwhelms you and shuts you down. in your past life, you may have spent much time being a helper/humanitarian to others, you seem to have lost touch with your inner child, and the happiness of life. instead, you tend to overlook your inner child's needs and take life seriously. a lesson for you will be to see life as a game rather than as something serious. there is a need to know things but an unwillingness to experience things in order to know. instead, there is the idea of "i must know everything now."

learning to manifest using your mind will be important also. you may excessively daydream and idolize scenarios, ultimately romanticizing your life. this can be a good thing if done right. if you learn to use your mind and daydreaming capabilities, you could manifest in ways done so effortlessly and perfectly. you must be ready to dive under the veil of superficiality instead of overlooking everything to gain a deep understanding of everything around you. you may wait for life to get good for you instead of making it good for yourself. you lack courage and the will to create your own destiny, and this life will teach you that you must motivate yourself and play with life to get what you want, instead of having an "it is what it is" mindset...

there is a far of commitment, whether it be on a personal or romantic level. romance is often superficial and poorly exercised as flirting, kissing, sex, or lighthearted conversations become the center point for this placement. when things start becoming serious, there is an instinctual habit to detach and run away. this can be in general too when you feel as though you need to escape or run away when things get serious for you. you detach quite easily - a habit you have learned to save your heart from getting broken.

your lesson? to learn how to experience life on a level that is fun and profound. your soul craves to experience others, but you must also experience yourself. you must trust yourself and others and learn how to dive beneath the surface. you must learn how to take responsibility and how to transform daydreaming into manifestation. learn to honor your own individuality, take courage for your own plans, and look for friends you can be yourself with, rather than to blur into...

virgo nn/pisces sn - realism, self-confidence, and service

giving up, inaction, or escapism will be of prominent lessons to you in this lifetime. in your last lifetime, you may have been the type to go with life's flow too much. you may have been the type to become easily discouraged, to drown yourself in other people, and to flow in and out of life. with pisces sn, there is the typical victim complex inherited in this lifetime also. withdrawal and oversensitivity would've caused your last life to breeding great depression, sadness, and unfairness. in this lifetime, there is a need to establish a concrete grounding in reality.

in your last life, your self-esteem may have been incredibly damaged or low, you never really found your place on earth. you waited for someone to save you rather than saving yourself; you wanted to escape life to escape responsibility and the pain of existing rather than making your problems go away yourself. you lacked routine and self-esteem so much so you deluded yourself with false dreams and daydreaming. you don't do well in competitions or in situations where you must confront someone or something. you spent considerably amounts of time being upset and a victim you never really had the chance to make life yours. you believed (or still believe) that life is against you and that everything you have been through or will go through, is a punishment for something you've done before. what you need to realize is thoughts and mindsets will become reflected in your everyday life. once you start treating sadness like an addiction, you will attract this. you may have also had a bad relationship with money. in this lifetime, you must learn that money is not an impure subject or thing, but actually a currency to exchange for your wants and needs.

being compassionate, giving, and vulnerable with others is your thing, but beware of being taken advantage of. you must learn to establish clear boundaries between yourself and others and to appreciate details rather than vagueness. don't overlook others or things by looking at the bigger picture, but be sure to analyze things or people more. it's especially important not to give everyone your time if you can't or don't want to. being a helper is in your blood but ensure you don't do it in vain or because you feel as though you want to be a savior for others. you must make your life productive and achieve something that is of material significance, rather than chasing the idyllic high of dreaming and escapism. spirituality and religion may have caused you to become obsessed with faith, but it has caused you to become detached from the material world, where you temporarily belong.

feelings of paranoia and mistrust may be relevant to you. in your last life, abuse may have been a big topic, whether it be from others or yourself. in this life, it is important you establish a clear faith that guides you through your purpose, rather than hoping for a spiritual escape. do not overindulge in suffering and do not let it become your personality. you must learn to stick to a routine or something that allows you to be present and aware. you must help others only if you are ready to balance this with helping yourself also. instead of suscepting to the chaos of life, you must learn to bring order to it. do not overindulge in feelings of betrayal, paranoia, or sadness, but learn to rationalize your feelings in a way that doesn't neglect how you truly feel. learn to prioritize work instead of aimlessly walking through life.

your lesson? to learn the importance of routine and grounding. you must focus and remain on earth, even when your head isn't. practice spirituality but don't let it consume you. don't wait for a great spiritual retreat while you are still stuck on earth. do not practice in mindless games with others and do not engage in the addiction sadness can bring. learn to take accountability for your behavior. help others, but only when you know you help yourself also. participate in things that help you build your self-confidence. learn to trust others, but do not let them take advantage of your kindness. do not look at the big picture without analyzing the fine print in any and every scenario. learn not to give up over inconveniences and learn to build a tenacious and courageous personality.

libra nn/aries sn — decision making, cooperation, friendship

in your last life, you may have been overly selfish and individualistic, you refused to know others, or at least neglected their presence or existence in your life. you were overly impulsive and let this control your life. you are unaware of partnership, or at least hesitant on it, because you want to do things your way. you think your speed is the right speed, your way is the only way, and your opinion is the only opinion that matters. you may live life on a constant high where you challenge yourself.

rage and stubbornness are key things to leave behind. in this life, you should learn to appreciate the greatness of partnership and relationships because they can actually build you up quicker than you can on your own. you may instinctually stomp down on others to get what you want but be completely oblivious of the damage you have caused until after. in this life, you must learn to balance the input of yourself and others. it's not fair for you to put down others to get what you want - you need to learn you must partake in other people's opinions too.

you must work with people who bring you lessons of empathy, sensitivity, and communication. asking for help is never a problem, especially when you do it to be better. in relationships, you may fear intimacy or commitment because you may feel your individuality is threatened and you may leave immediately. this is not a healthy mindset to have, just because your personality is being challenged. and actually, any issues you have, such as feeling restrained, are perfect opportunities for open communication with your partners or people in general. you are used to being self-sufficient and relying on yourself. this is actually a common trait in people who are narcissistic and see life as a game of survival. your need for solitude and independence will only get you so far before you realize there are more ways to make life great and productive, including working with other people.

you may be so tied up in yourself that you forget others have feelings, too. in relationships, for example, it may become difficult for you to comprehend your partner's feelings because you rarely think beyond your own brain. you need to become more selfless with people instead of always assuming you are right and that you deserve everything, while others don't. by becoming inaccessible to others you limit the connections you have in life. you try protect your identity by letting people see parts of it, rather than expressing yourself to others.

your lesson? learn duality by working with others in a way that is healthy and cooperative. your last life comprised of you fighting to be alone and independent, but it bit back by starving you off relationships and causing you to become overly self-reliant. working with others bears no threat to you. asking for help is not a bad thing. assertiveness and impulsivity are great traits to have but they should be in balance with patience and careful decision-making. humble yourself by recognizing you cannot make it through life alone without the aid of others - romantic or platonic - because your karma relies on others for help. you must learn healthy communication and learn to get along with others by becoming open-minded to their lifestyle. you can maintain your individuality while in a relationship — don't convince yourself you can't.

scorpio nn/taurus sn — self-worth, money, and partnership

your "achilles heal" in this lifetime is believing your worth is tied to money and materials. you are the type to believe that "once i have this and that, and once i have more money, i will finally be happy." all you want is money really, and you may be possessive with what you have, or secretive with your possessions. in this lifetime, you are meant to share with others, whether romantically, platonically, or in work, to foster a culture in which you become openminded on things that matter beyond just money and possessions.

in your past life, you may have had a life with rigid rules. now, you may have been born with an "it is what it is" attitude, causing you to stagnate throughout life because you believe things are supposed to go a certain way always, rather than becoming aware of other ways to achieve your goals. you are born with certain values or beliefs and in this lifetime, you will be tested on whether you are willing to let rigid beliefs go, or if you will stick with them, using them as your pillar for security, predictability, and safety. if you fail to experiment with life and acknowledge your soul needs for things like travel, meditation, and prayer, you may become stuck with living "one way", shunning your spiritual health and sticking to what is predictable. there is the habit of extreme tunnel vision and you must become aware of it.

one key lesson for you in this life is to learn partnership with others, especially in romantic relationships. you may feel tempted to do things by yourself "my way, or the hard way" but one challenge for you may be the lack of resources you find because truthfully, you are not supposed to work alone in this lifetime. you may have spent some time in your past life in solitude but you have the gift of creating and building and earning money with someone. think of them as another step towards what you want...

another lesson for you may be to release your urges to be stubborn, rigid, and fixed, and to humble yourself. you have a habit of being a "know it all" with no regard for other people's input and thereby think everything must be done your way because it is the only way. you may feel as though your life is going to be a long, hard process in which you will become enslaved to society to make money and work. your life was not meant to be difficult now, because you have already overworked yourself in your past life. instead, there needs to be a refocusing of materials and money, towards the question of your spiritual health, what makes you happy, and what you can do to improve yourself spiritually.

your lesson? learn to surrender and trust others. learn to be vulnerable with others and to let yourself love unapologetically. money is a tool for what you want but don’t let money consume you. you put too much emphasis on money and therefore let it dictate your self-esteem, your worth, and life. learn to experience joy with others. you must learn to be open minded with other people rather than sticking to a thinking pattern so rigid and stubborn. let go of control by allowing yourself more freedom in expression. try not to take everything so seriously — you live one life once, make the most of it.

sagittarius nn/gemini sn — solitude, intuition, knowledge

there is a fine line between intuition and faith and, for you, you must come in the middle of the two, as this is your karma. in your past life you may have not relied on your intuition enough or completely disregarded it while actively seeking for the "truth" of life. you may have become so engrossed in learning about others, you don't know much about yourself. you have worked with others to the point where you're not sure how to have one opinion. you second-guess too much to the point you overwhelm yourself with possibilities of what-ifs. this is how you miss out on people or events or on basic day-to-day living: by second-guessing and making assumptions that aren't there. you can't bluntly take information for what it is; you always feel there is a double meaning to it. you don't trust your intuition because it's not a tangible thing to rely on. it's a voice in your head or it's a feeling in your heart or gut — you simply can't decide.

in this life, you must learn how to be alone and how significant solitude can be for the soul. when alone, you learn to listen to your own intuition and build a rapport with it. when alone, you learn about yourself and what you like. solo-travel is perfect for this. you get along with just about anyone but you are bad for saying "no" to what you don't like. this comes from wanting to please others and always wanting to be involved, so much so that you almost never miss any opportunity in case you miss something important. you want to feel involved and mentally stimulated - when you're idle you feel lost. you may have a bad habit of gossiping or lying to get what you want. this is because you understand others so well that you tend to abuse this skill and manipulate your way out of situations, for example, or manipulate people to get what you want.

you may be the type to hop opinions as new information surfaces. you are not the type to listen to your intuition and base an opinion on personal experience, what seems right, and morals. you tend to base your opinion on the ultimate truth and to accept it for what it is; you, however, change it as new information becomes available. you are optimistic and extremely hopeful but this can be a huge weakness if you ignore your intuition for events that are harmful or negative. you tend to think everything will work out until it doesn't. this isn't a bad thing and, actually, your thoughts seem to become reaffirmed when it works out the next time.

you must accept you can only work with others so much until you must take time for yourself also. you have spent considerable time with others and must work in solitude to learn about yourself and to establish faith and a connection with your soul/intuition. you are so tied up in being accepted by others you limit your happiness to those people. you forget what it's like being alone because you engross yourself in others and their opinions, their likes, and their opinions. being social is never a bad thing but how do you maintain your own identity when you don't?

your lesson? to spend more time alone and establish a crystal clear connection with yourself. you rely on others for validation but it should ultimately come from you. you must learn to approach life in a way that is hopeful and adventurous. you must also learn not to be a people pleaser and to eliminate yourself from the shackles of gossip and lying to deceive others. you may play mind games with others or simply deceive them because you don't want to be seen or simply because that's just who you are. learn to be subjective and to have an opinion of your own, rather than settling for other people's opinions, or the "ultimate truth."

capricorn nn/cancer sn — self-control, individuality, self-respect

key attributes for you to develop in this lifetime are: self-control, self-care, looking towards the future, individuality, and goal-orientation. in this lifetime, there will be a huge lesson of contrasting emotion to logic and direction. in your last life you may have been horrible dependent on others and may have washed away your identity completely as you submerged yourself in the past of yourself and others. cancer is a highly reflective and sentimental sign, with an attraction towards nostalgia and familiarity. however, this trait may be abused when you overindulge in thinking about the past, about what you've lost, instead of looking towards the future. on the contrary, capricorn is a present and future-oriented sign with big dreams. in your last life you may have been so emotional you overwhelmed others with your demands and needs. you may have been manipulative to others. in this life you must free yourself from these bad habits, as they don't serve you anything good, and instead bring you down, and others too.

you must learn to take responsibility and more action in your life. you are overly passive or don't feel like you need to take action but even when you do need to take action, you don't. you spend too much time alone and can't seem to take charge. in this life, you will learn to take control of your life and steer it in the direction of change and success. you may be so embossed in helping others, you forget your own needs. you may have had bad family karma in which too much was demanded of you and you felt drained and overwhelmed. this is similar to how you may have been in the past — draining, demanding, and overwhelming.

you may fear rejection as a result of a low self-esteem. this stems from past life karma where you didn't receive enough love to prove that you are worthy. therefore, the only validation you could've gotten was from you and, whenever someone tells you you're not good enough, you feel as though you've been proven right: you're really not good enough, no matter how hard you try. this breeds many bad habits such as being codependent on others and constantly wanting attention or stimulation from them because it feeds your inner void. with capricorn, you must learn to protect yourself and feed yourself, rather than pulling other people in for the sole purpose of feeding your ego.

an important lesson for you will be to cherish feelings and happy times but also to let go of the past and accept it for what it is. you may be uncertain of the future, thereby staying in the realm of the past rather than acknowledging the past and the possibilities of the future. there's a strong need for attention and emotional stimulation. lack of emotional awareness and emotional security cause you to be emotionally immature, manipulative, and toxic to others.

you must learn to become secure in your own being and to recognize life has so many possibilities, it's almost infinite. you can do what you want, but until you learn to build stability and strong self-esteem inside you, the possibilities won't really satisfy you. you must drop the fear of failure by realizing rejection is merely redirection. what is meant for you will find you. you have a deep need to belong but you must firstly belong to YOURSELF before you can commit to others and start demanding from them.

your lesson? to maintain a positive, future-oriented, and present focused. acknowledge the past and reminisce, but seldom. do not indulge in the feelings of the past because the past is not going to show up in your present or future. you must learn to control your emotions and to become more goal-oriented in this lifetime. your lesson will be to detach from the toxicity of codependency and attachment and to take more responsibility in your life. do not be afraid to take risks but approach life from an adult's perspective. do not let insecurity consume you, but use insecurity to build yourself stronger.

aquarius nn/leo sn — friendship, humility, working with the collective

in this lifetime, you are learning to let go of stubbornness and pride and to create win/win situations with others by working with various people. in your last life, you may have experienced extreme amounts of fame and attention. now, you have inherited similar thinking patterns of "i deserve the world" or "i'm too special for everyone." you must practice humility and honesty. it will be your duty/responsibility to rebuild your identity after such a climb to fame.

you may have spent considerable amounts of time on your own or on personal projects you have completely lost touch with others and no longer have group awareness. what this means is that you input your opinion or will or demands in almost every scenario you're in instead of touching base with others in a way that is curious and honest. you tend to do things your way, unaware that it may not be the best way to do something. you have insane resilience and passionate ambitions but your need to control and micromanage everything causes everything to collapse on you because you didn't gamble enough. you are confident but let it get to your head. it's what we call an overdeveloped ego: you focus on yourself so much you don't know how to focus or connect with others.

a lesson for you will be to learn humility and to embrace change and rebellion when necessary. you must learn to work with others, whatever the relationship may be, and to let go of your ego. you have a lot of love and compassion to give to others but you feel as though you're too good for anyone when this is never the case. you are more than good enough; don't delude yourself into thinking you are better than everyone, and that nobody can ever be as perfect as you. this will make you undermine others because you refuse to see the positives in them because you are so tied up with your own qualities.

you constantly need attention and approval and, in this lifetime, you will learn the importance of balancing the ego and being humble. you must work with others and give back to humankind, as they were the ones who brought you your attention and grandeur in previous lifetimes. you must direct your energy towards others instead of to yourself. by constantly feeding yourself with attention, you tend to think you don't need anyone and that you can do it all by yourself. this is not true; there are many parts of you that, in actuality, are insecure.

your lesson? to work with others and learn the balance between yourself and the ego. you must acquaint yourself with the desire of friendship and to relate with them on levels that extend beyond normal conversations and superficiality. you must learn others are special too and learn they can actually contribute to your character development rather than always doing it all on your own. understand that differing points of view are just as important as yours. you may be the main character but there is a reason why side characters exist; they serve the purpose of being guides to you.

pisces nn/virgo sn — spirituality, release of control, reflection

virgo sn is a sign of anxiety, obsession, and inflexibility. virgo is an earth sign, a mutable one at that, capable of adapting to its environment, whatever the demands may be. however, this placement can cause much distress as the traits of being analyzing, honest, communicative, and critical, become twisted and turn into something so much more depressing and harmful. this placement can breed someone who is so critical of others, is a gossiper, and is passive-aggressive.

your need for order is your ultimate "achilles heal" as with order comes control and obsession and perfection. you are a perfectionist but you over-analyze details and strive for perfection in everything you do. your obsession with perfection causes you to become inflexible to things you're not familiar with. in this lifetime, you will be forced to live life with the flow, rather than through a lens of panic. excessive routines and planning won't be of much use to you because this life challenges you to think spiritually and freely. in this life, you are challenged to trust in the divine and to learn a more wishy-washy approach to life. you should trust in the universe or God more than you trust planners and routines. you may be excessively judgmental and spend a lot of time criticizing others, while never doing the same to you. why? because this is a highly insecure placement with little stability and almost no self-esteem. you project your insecurities through passive-aggressive remarks and are highly hypocritical. you try to fix others by always looking for what's wrong. this is also applicable in general life, where you need to fix something to feel some sort of satisfaction within you.

in this lifetime, you will have to learn to work with others, but in a way that is reciprocating and honest. you must forget to be right all the time. you must forget you have to know everything always. you must forget you always have the answers because you really don't. you must accept change as it comes to you instead of resisting it because once you resist it, it will come against you in strengths tenfold.

in this life, you must focus on what really feeds you spiritually and soulfully. this is a life of reflection and meditation. you must let go of the details and look at life through a lens much bigger than now. you must look at life with an open mind. this is a self-purifying placement more than anything. you may have a habit of always trying to do everything, which ultimately causes you to do nothing. you rush yourself to do everything, you don't actually end up being productive at all, despite being a very productive sign.

you may appreciate hard work so much, you revolve your life or time around it. material success isn't really of much concern to you, but if it is, it's a highly toxic way of being. in this lifetime, you will learn to let your head sit in the clouds for a bit, instead of over-rationalizing everything always. not everything is so serious all the time, is it?

your lesson? to become more vulnerable with life. virgo is a sheltered sign and rarely shows emotion. however, pisces invites you to ride on life's current and to take time to think about life and the universe on a bigger picture. you must find peace and engage in meaningful work instead of focusing on the mundane. fix the need to always needing to fix everything and needing to be right; learn to accept others and not criticize them. your critical nature comes from your horribly withered self-esteem and, without work being done on it, you will become trapped in a cycle of judgment and comparison. work on yourself and purify your self-esteem through meditation, journaling, creativity, alone time, and meaningful engagement with others.

#astro notes #astro observations #astrology

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astraltrickster · 8 months

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Since the wave of mass site migrations there is one REALLY worrisome trend I've been noticing: the number of radfem posts I've been seeing ending up on my dash, reblogged unknowingly by people who think they're just base-level feminist statements, has all but gone back to c.2014 levels. Everything seems good on a surface level, but I spot one dogwhistle, or something strikes me as being a little too absolutist, and I check into that...and sure enough, the road leads back to terf city.

So here's a quick PSA:

Please be careful with your Feminism 101 sources.

See, terfs and their close relatives KNOW we don't like them here, so they don't tend to lead with their well-known hatred of trans women. On top of that, there is a problem with a subset of radfems on this site who purport to be trans-inclusive - i.e., they openly support trans women...but DESPISE trans men (often more than they hate cis men, because of the whole "joining the enemy"/"gender traitor" myth pushed by terfs) or any nonbinary person who aligns partially with manhood or masculinity, especially if they're AMAB (they often think they can "save" - i.e., conversion-therapy - the AFAB ones).

Therefore, on a single-post level, it is very, VERY hard to tell the difference between a basic feminist statement that, yeah, patriarchy exists and that means there are lots of awful double-standards around gender where women broadly get the shorter end of the stick and these standards AFFECT every individual in a society and that's something we should work to change, and a statement that these things are absolute and inevitable, either because Biology or because those double-standards are too deeply ingrained to EVER overcome without giving up and starting over from scratch (whichever is convenient), and the only solution is hardline female wombyn-born-wombyn separatism or at LEAST excluding trans people from public life for, at best, making it too hard to tell who's ~safe~. In fact, sometimes on that single-post basis, they could potentially even be identical - though less frequently than many people thought in the heyday of "OP was a terf so I stole this post but anyway all men are walking rape threats and need to accept that any reasonable person will always hate and fear them on sight".

So what can you, random newbie, do to avoid unwittingly passing one of these messages on without turning into some kind of horrible "feminism is cancer" chud?

Well, one of the easiest ways is the Shinigami Eyes browser extension, but I personally don't like to rely on it because 1) you can't use it on every platform (sorry mobile app likers), 2) in my experience it's somewhat common for "trans-inclusive" radfems to be flagged as safe because someone saw their positivity for trans women but not their hatred for trans men, and 3) I just don't like to promote the use of browser extensions as a substitute for learning what radfem rhetoric is and why it is, in fact, anything but feminist; it is very beneficial to terfs if the ONLY thing you know of their rhetoric is "they hate trans women".

The hard but better way is to actually familiarize yourself with what to look out for. Here is an inexhaustive list:

Category 0: Tags to add to your blacklist

Your blacklist filters out posts with the blacklisted tags in the reblog you're seeing, OR in the root post. Therefore, if a radfem post that looks like it's just base-level feminism does breach containment somehow and end up on your dash through someone else, it will still get caught if it's tagged with any of these:

Terfsafe

Radblr

Radfem

Terfs/radfems do interact/do touch/please interact/please touch, etc

Category 1: Terf-ese and dogwhistles

Some of these, especially those near the top of the list, are immediate telltale signs. Others are less certain, but they should at least raise some eyebrows.

"Gender critical" - literally a synonym for terf just used to make the ideology sound more legitimate; they often claim that terf is a slur

"TIM/TIF" - "Trans-identified male/female", a way to delegitimize trans identities

"Febfem" - female-exclusive bisexual woman; a bisexual woman who rejects her attraction to men; essentially a modern term for "political lesbian" (a group which claimed that lesbianism is not a sexual orientation that some people just Have, but a political choice to reject men)

"Butch flight" - the claim that trans men are butch lesbians transitioning to escape lesbophobia and gain male privilege

"Adult human female" - this very simplified dictionary definition of "woman" is something of a rallying cry

"Let girls be tomboys/butch" - some people say this in response to old repressive gender roles in things like dress codes, or even people holding trans women to a higher standard of femininity than cis women, but if that is not explicitly the context it's very likely that this means "stop the evil plastic surgery racket from force-transing every little girl who even looks at a truck, which they're TOTALLY doing"

The inverse, while less common (terfs tend to be very open about not wanting men to be feminine in any way because of "deception" and "false security"), is also one to look out for - sometimes it's a statement against binarism and gender essentialism, sometimes it's basically an assertion of the Blanchard "feminine homosexual man vs. autogynephilic man" model of what a trans woman is

"Compulsory heterosexuality/comphet" - an aspect of heteronormativity whereby it's common, especially for younger people, to try to force themselves to experience heterosexual attraction when they don't. Useful as it may seem, the term was coined by radfems. Most people who are not terfs or other radfems who want to discuss it will discuss it under the umbrellas of heteronormativity and amatonormativity

Hogwarts houses - this is a sneaky one; far from everyone who read those books or even enjoyed them is a terf, but since JKR's full-tilt descent into fascism via the gateway of transphobia, terfs HAVE been using this as a way to seek out their own and mark themselves as safe; let this also serve as a reminder that if you are NOT a terf PLEASE REMOVE THIS FROM YOUR BIO; it WILL both draw them to you AND cause you to be immediately distrusted by anyone else, saying "I DO NOT CONDONE THE VIEWS OF JKR" will not help because terfs can and do lie about that too in communities where they have to stay crypto, at best you're granting them plausible deniability

Referring to men and women as "males" and "females"

Usernames referencing "female" reproductive anatomy - may be a good sign if they're attached to trans-positive modifiers like "boy" or "they", but a username like "divine-vagina" or "ovariesofpower" (note these are theoretical usernames, not ones I've encountered in the wild; if someone does have one of those usernames and isn't a radfem I'm deeply sorry) is probably a terf

Hatred of makeup and plastic surgery - look, no one likes the beauty industry, no one is going to dispute that beauty standards are a nightmare, but this is frequently a smokescreen for hating gender confirmation or anything that helps with the "deception" inherent to transness; be ESPECIALLY wary of anyone talking about "TikTok plastic surgeons trying to sell their services to impressionable teenage girls", this usually translates to "gender confirmation surgeons telling young transmascs that there are options for them", and remember that you either believe in bodily autonomy or you don't, there is no third option

Category 2: Ideological concepts to look out for

This is some of the beginnings of crossing the line from feminism to radfem bullshit - if the rest of the post seems cool but starts heading in these directions, don't assume it's hyperbole; get it as far away from you as possible.

Patriarchy, men-oppressing-women, is THE root system of injustice from which all others spawn. Some will acknowledge that other factors may intersect, but will still claim that they are lesser. Bringing up the long history of white women getting men of color, especially Black men, killed via weaponized fragility and false claims of sexual violence, is just a series of flukes and pointing it out to refute this notion that men vs. women outranks all other inequalities is just whataboutism.

Because patriarchy is so far-reaching, it affects every individual, and because it trumps all other axes of oppression, this means that in every interaction between any man and any woman, the man will be the one with more power.

Men, due to socialization, biology, or both, are categorically incapable of recognizing women as full people. This is not only a broad pattern, but an inevitable fact, true of every individual man, no matter how hard anyone tries to change it.

There is a singular Universal Female Experience. According to terfs, this is an external force; trans women don't have this socialization experience, therefore they can never truly know what it's like to be a woman. According to tirfs, it is internal; trans men process their experiences internally as men from birth to death and therefore have no claim to truly understand any experience of misogyny directed at them.

The experience of being a woman is, first and foremost, suffering. It is therefore to be expected that a certain subset of people would transition to try to escape it - but it's the wrong answer, and this practice of either self-destruction or betrayal must be stopped at all costs. Anyone who wants in on the miserable experience that is womanhood, on the other hand, is at best insensitively looking at a burning building and going "wow, that looks so warm!", blissfully but cruelly unaware of the misery of the situation, and at worst is lying to satisfy a fetish.

Women are categorically incapable of abusing men, because patriarchy outranks all, down to the individual level. Some may also say that this is true because of biological differences in physical strength. (Very feminist, isn't it, to say "the strongest woman is still weaker than the weakest man and nothing can ever change that"?)

There is, fundamentally, no difference between a person with some subconscious misogyny problems and an incel mass shooter; both will abuse women, and therefore both must be treated as threats.

Because the power differential between men and women is so great, a woman cannot TRULY meaningfully consent to sex with a man; all sex between a man and a woman is rape.

Because rape is such a common trauma among women, the very existence of men - or penises, for that matter, even fully clothed ones - in a space where a woman doesn't expect them is traumatic and itself tantamount to rape.

Lesbians don't just have their own unique flavor of oppression experience like any other queer subgroup; they are in fact THE most uniquely oppressed and vulnerable of all, because being a lesbian is first and foremost not about attraction to women, but rejection of men (recall the ties to political lesbianism). Some radfems will embrace contradictory labels or slightly varied personal definitions for other queer subgroups - but if you're anything but a Kinsey 6 who would never even consider making an exception, and 100% a binary woman, you CAN'T identify as a lesbian. You cannot identify as a lesbian if you wouldn't dump your partner or try to conversion-therapy "her" if "she" came out as transmasc. To a tirf, you cannot identify as a lesbian if you're on the butch-transmasc cusp, if they're willing to admit such a cusp exists in the first place. To terfs, you cannot identify as a lesbian if you would ever date a trans woman, let alone if you ever have.

Again, this is far from being an exhaustive list, but it covers most of the most common things that set off my own alarm bells. Additions are more than welcome.

Remember, the danger of letting radfem posts slide because they seem okay on the surface is twofold: one, you're directing more people to their blogs and exposing them to more people they may then target, and two, when those concepts that cross the line bleed out into your gender theory, the result is bad for you and everyone around you.

#internet culture #internet safety #serious tag #internet bullshittery warning #tumblr culture

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n3xii · 9 months

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Next phase in your friendship/social life

Hello guys! I haven't made a pac in a while because I recently started a new job, but I finally got the chance to do a reading for yall! Today's reading is about the next era in your friendship/social life. Choose an image that resonates with you and don't take the reading too seriously if it doesn't resonate!

Pile one

I think its possible that this pile may be stumbling upon a new friendship as a whole, I see a new relationship is forming on the basis of pure excitement and happiness. This friendship is new, you don't know this person or you haven't connected before, however i'm being shown that they still feel familiar to you. This is because there a deep connection where you feel like you both know one another in depth already, this friendship has so much emotional and sentimental potiential, you will feel at home with this person. On a subconcious level you already know them and will feel a burst of energy with this person in your life. I see that you both bring a sense of stability in each other's life because both or one of you struggles with their identity and knowing how to sort out the intenral choas and confusion. This friendship will bring more clarity to yall and help you deal with inner conflict, yall may help each other with this often. You will help each other sort out what's aligned with each others purpose and values as well as walking away from what's not for you.

Pile two

For this pile I'm actually seeing that there has be a loss/falling out in a friendship OR you feel that you're missing out when it comes to this area of your life. Either way, you feel stuck in this situation and no matter what you do you still feel frustrated with the lack of movement and stagnation happening in this area if life. I'm seeing you guys develop a more nurturing, compassionate relationship with yourself in place of a friendship. I'm seeing that at the nkment, you look at yourself as the glass half full, you don't feel comfortable with whi you are or even know yourself that well, because of this you're being moved in the direction of fulfilling yourself before relying on a friendship to being you that sense of connection. You're being guided to find gratitude for yourself by doing some intenral soul searching. The next phase in this area of life is focused on you trying to find confort in your own company, because I'm seeing that your mind can be very tormenting. Anxiety, insomnia, overthinking issues. Basically what I'm seeing here is that you must learn to enjoy your own company before expecting other people to, as well as you learning to nurture yourself when it comes to anxiety or overthinking

Pile three

This pile will be leaving a friendship or situation behind as it was toxic or perhaps a betrayal was happening. I'm definetly seeing a cycle in relationship coming to an end, whatever narrative or pattern of behavior that kept repeating is being cut out from your life. This new phase will be very dynamic, you may be balancing several relationships at once and attracting future lovers towards you that start as friends at first. I am seeing a message that you will be balancing out unequal/unfair friendhips in this new phase because you wont be tolerating people who expect you to play several roles at once, or peoole who dont partipate on their end of the friendship. You want a give and take, where the energy is balanced and fair instead if one-sided. You're also glowing and people want to be around you in this nee era as well, especially after detaching from something that was hurtful or toxic , your energy is becoming more magnetic and more repellant towards people who are selfish

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dragonflavoredcake · 2 years

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I don't know how many parents are on here, but

Please, I am begging you, if you think your child might be neurodivergent, tell them.

Sit them down, ask them a few questions about symptoms of whatever condition you think they might have, and listen to what they have to say.

Mull it over. See how their answers measure up to professional diagnostic criteria and the childhood experiences of other neurodivergent people.

If you see things aligning, tell your kid what's going on and take them to see a reputable professional (if they're younger) or ask them if they want to talk to a pro about getting a diagnosis (if they're older).

Please, don't try to hide their neurodivergence from them. I went through school not understanding why I had such a hard time connecting with people. I grew up with a "not like other girls" complex because I genuinely was not like them. I grew up thinking that everyone hated certain textures, that everyone found buffet lines stressful, that my social struggles were just introversion. When I had to secure my own accommodations, I told people that I occasionally had sensory overloads.

When my mother told me that she'd known for years that I probably had ADHD and autism, I was an adult, and I resented her for that decision. After the lightbulb moment faded, I demanded to know why she hadn't told me before, and she said that I hadn't been struggling.

But I had been struggling. I had assumed that my struggles were normal and I'd been bent on "fixing" myself in a way that couldn't and shouldn't be done.

Had I been given that vocabulary, I could've explained why I became so obsessed with my interests.

I could've given a better explanation than "I have sensory overloads sometimes" when I had to wear noise-canceling headphones in high school (and I probably wouldn't have gotten those accommodations if I hadn't had a reputation as a good student). I could've told my teachers that it was because I was autistic, instead of relying on a term that I learned from Spider-Man fanfiction.

I could've researched ways to work around my ADHD so I didn't drown under a mountain of late work.

If you hide your child's neurodivergence from them, you are refusing to give them the right tools to understand themselves.

#adhd #autism #actually autistic #the neurodivergent experience #neurodivergent #short essays #parenting #childcare #this has been a psa #blog psa

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gwenllian-in-the-abbey · 23 days

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"Yet you toil still in service to men. Your father, your husband, and your son. You desire not to be free but to make a window in the wall of your prison."

Episodes 9

What's your opinion on the speech?

Rhaenys' speech here is a bit silly. What woman doesn't "toil in service to men" in this world? Medieval women were not even allowed to own property or sign contracts. Part of this show's problem is that some of the writers seem to be under the impression that Westeros is undergoing a feminist movement and Alicent is "team patriarchy" while Rhaenyra is "team feminism," as if Rhaenyra's own "right" to rule doesn't derive specifically from a man, her father, granting her that right, as if that same man couldn't snatch it from her on a whim. She has to toil in service to her own father, and even if she becomes queen, she will find herself surrounded by and beholden to men who will very quickly remove their support if she does not dance to their tune, and in fact we see this in the Dance, where Rhaenyra has terrible advisors but she's not really able to remove them because she can't risk them going over to the other side. And when she does attempt to assert herself against them, this is precisely what they do.

I think many people don't understand that the idea of women as an oppressed group, with solidarity across class lines, religious lines, and ethnic lines, that is, intersectional feminism, is extremely modern. Rhaenys cannot separate herself from her class interests, she lacks even the most basic framework necessary to do so. She might see her sex as a prison, but her greater allegiance would be to the Targaryen royalty that she was born into. Breaking free from the prison of patriarchy would mean also being metaphorically exiled from her own royal privilege. When it came to the council of 101, Rhaenys did not risk alienating herself from her grandfather the king in order to assert her right to the throne, instead she put forward her son Laenor as an alternative. In her marriage with Lord Corlys, she deferred to him rather than risk her status as Lady of Driftmark. Rhaenys did not pit herself against the might of the patriarchy because it would mean pitting herself against the might of the monarchy itself.

This isn't a criticism of Rhaenys. She only did what most women in her position would have done. She did not have what Rhaenyra had, the mandate of a king who had thrown the might of the monarchy behind her cause, declaring her an exception. Viserys did not sign a decree asserting absolute primogeniture because he could not pit the monarchy against the patriarchy when the monarchy itself relied on the patriarchy to uphold it. And in our world, knowing that monarchy and patriarchy waled hand in hand, many medieval/early modern queens regnant very much avoided overly associating themselves with womenhood, instead leaning into the rhetoric that they were female in body, but male in spirit. They believed that as exceptional women, they might claim a sort of honorary male status. Think of Elizabeth I's speech to the troops at Tilbury as they prepared to face the Spanish Armada, when she said:

"I know I have the body of a weak and feeble woman; but I have the heart and stomach of a king, and of a king of England too..."

Notice how she concedes the point about her "weak and feeble" woman's body? She then goes on to say that she has the heart and stomach not of a man, but of a king, aligning herself not only with manhood, but with royalty, which is the source of her exceptional status. And this is echoed in the idea of Rhaenyra seeing herself as an exception, when Lord Corlys reminds her that if she allows women to inherit the seats of Stokeworth and Rosby, she may lose the support of lords who took her side. They were siding not with a woman because they believed in smashing the patriarchy, but rather they were siding with monarchy, believing Rhaenyra had the mandate of the old king. However that mandate could be revoked if Rhaenyra were to turn against the patriarchy and attempt to divorce it from the monarchy.

So the ironic thing is, Rhaenyra is doing very nearly the same thing Rhaenys is accusing Alicent of doing, except if womanhood is a prison, then perhaps rather than building a window in the prison, Rhaenyra has secured parole for good behavior. She could be put back into the prison at any time and is keenly aware of that. The prison of patriarchy, after all, still exists within the walled confines of feudal monarchy, and neither Rhaenys nor Rhaenyra are attempting to climb those walls.

#asks #hotd critical #rhaenys targaryen #anti rhaenyra targaryen #anti team black #but not really #team green

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cosettepontmercys · 10 days

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I truly can’t pinpoint when/what exactly changed about Taylor’s fans/fandom but the last few years (especially the midnights release) has really soured things for me and it’s honestly quite disappointing as someone who genuinely enjoys her music and thinks she’s a great artists. how did we get to the point of not even being able to voice an opinion about taylor without being crucified online. or if heaven forbid you dislike a song/album or enjoy the work of one of her exes (john mayer, the 1975, calvin harris, etc)

i’ve always been very fascinated/intrigued by the relationship between celebrities and their fans. and i think it’s really interesting to look back and think about how taylor built her fanbase by making herself as palatable/relatable/approachable as possible. like secret sessions, t party/loft 89/rep room, swiftmas, lover diaries, etc — all of which allow for fan interaction — but also relies on people getting noticed which then in turn encourages people to be as vocal? extra? whatever it is. which then feeds into the "who is a bigger / better fan" competition. i'm speaking from personal experience here, as someone who has liked her since debut — but i think a lot of this is also rooted in how much of the world hated taylor swift prior to ... i want to say folklore, really — like it was deeply uncool to like taylor swift, to be a swiftie, etc. and because a lot of that early criticism was rooted so much in misogyny, i think fans felt the need to (over the years) defend her — and i was one of those! i still am, when i feel like people are criticizing her unfairly. but i think that lends into the "taylor swift has never done anything wrong, and she's perfect and if you disagree then you're against us and you're a fake fan" mentality.

and then i think there's an element of ... not necessarily a superiority complex, but a something among fans who have met taylor. it's a genius marketing move, intentions aside. taylor's music is very personal — and taylor's marketing, and persona is very personal, in a way that other artists prior to taylor weren't, i think. relatability sells. you can see it in the way that people talk about her, and her music. which is very different from the way people talk about other artists — and obviously there isn't anyone else out there with the amount of fame/popularity as her, but you don't see the same amount of fanfiction-writing personal-life-speculating-projection onto other artists' lyrics as you do with taylor. and i think that when someone is that vulnerable with their thoughts, it makes it easy for people to think that they know them personally.

and i think that — as much as i love taylor — it's important to talk about her white woman feminism mentality. and i think that also seeps into how her fanbase interacts with her. the ginny & georgia "joke" is what comes to mind the quickest, but there are countless instances of taylor's white woman feminism — and her benefiting from it. and obviously it was in her right to call out a misogynistic comment, especially one directed at her, but not saying anything when the actress got so much hate for a line she didn't write ... made me feel a bit 🥴. it's interesting to see who taylor will choose to align herself with, i guess is all i'm saying.

i've really taken a step back from taylor — not just because the fandom is exhausting ( the amount of things i've seen about her, joe, travis, etc. is ... something! it's all projection! we do not know anything about these people other than what they choose to show us! ) but also because of her saying that she wanted to be on the right side of history and then over and over again choosing to be increasingly passive and silent. she will call herself an ally but won’t even talk about queer rights; she won’t talk about the literal genocide that’s going on. gun control, abortion rights, anything at all. it's just "go vote" but even that is incredibly passive. but she will take time to remind us to buy new variants, and to stream her music, and that her ex sucks.

i think there was a huge shift that started with folklore/evermore, just given that there weren't a lot of albums being put out during that time, the overwhelming public reception to it — a lot of people who previously didn't care for (or disliked) taylor started to like her, to give her a second chance, etc. then we get into the rerecordings era/midnights/etc., which started off with fearless and nostalgia and then became "how quickly can i put out the next thing". and bailey @placeinthisworld posted this earlier, which i fully agree with. it's about the next award, the next milestone. it's just all quantity. it's overexposure.

and then we have the joe alwyn breakup and the public response to that was also ... interesting. like i saw people crying over it, or saying that love is a lie, removing things from their playlists, acting like they were the ones who had been broken up with. which is just ... odd, given that we aren't the ones in the relationship. and now there are all these comments about being a "joe defender". and then with taylor dating travis, it feels almost like some weird american pipe dream unfulfilled fantasy for so many people — the singer and the american football player. and obviously, i want her to be happy! i don't care who she dates! but i do think the public reception about her and travis has been ... incredibly odd, and i think that the way people talk about her and travis is just ... very ... off-putting and is very rooted in some weird ... stuff. "she finally gets to be small :(((((" is such a weird thing to say. it feels like there's even more projection and self-insert-y stuff with her dating travis, which is a level i did not think was possible from her fans (and more so, the general public).

i have not felt this ... detached and impassive about a taylor release, ever, and it just makes me incredibly sad because i love her music, and am excited about the work, just not excited about the public reception, the public autopsy of her and joe's relationship, or the noise, and i know that internet spaces (and spaces in general) are what we curate, but it's also difficult when she is everywhere.

#so sorry this took so long to reply to! i was out of town!#post: answered #ts critical

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hyperions-fate · 7 months

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I hope this comes across as a genuine query, and not aggressive. You say ‘unwavering’ support, which seems oddly without finer distinction for you. But perhaps you have your reasons so let me ask, how do you personally feel about Hamas, and Hezbollah too, if you’re willing to finesse this ‘unwavering support’ you feel we all should be giving the various resistance groups, as well as terrorist organisations, against Israel? I ask because they seem entirely antithetical to what seems to be your core values, apart from the reviling Israel part of course.

Also, again if you’re willing to be questioned further (and again, in the spirit of genuine curiosity and disputation – and also forgive me asking this in anon, I’d rather you not block me: I enjoy your blog, despite feeling very uneasy, whenever you talk about Israel the way you do), I never saw your thoughts on the recent and sustained huge mass rallies of the Israeli people against the enormities of their own government, which I thought was curious: I’d’ve thought you’d’ve supported that greatly, praise where it’s due, no? Not violent enough, perhaps?

Anyway, speaking of violence, Israel and its recent hard right government now has casus belli to do what they’ve been itching to do for years: they’re about to walk right through Gaza and the West Bank with massive irresistible military retaliations, and Lebanon too, and any other Arab neighbour, should they get involved. I just, personally, reckon that’s worth thinking about before ‘celebrating’ days like today.

I appreciate the frankness, but the premise of your questions are false. Every victim of occupation and ethnic cleansing, regardless of their ideology, has a legal right to resist the states that oppress them. The reason why Hamas has any currency among Palestinians is because they are willing to fight back. Few Palestinians align with their ideology, but all, including Palestine's socialists, trade unions, and civil society, support their commitment to the resistance.

Imagine yourself in their position: you live in a besieged refugee camp; your family had their homes and communities destroyed or depopulated by Jewish militias in 1948; you are under military rule, subject to airstrikes, detention without charge, settler pogroms; you have no democratic rights, and you are essentially an unfree stranger in your own land. Finding yourself in that situation, would you simply do nothing and rely on the goodwill of feckless Israeli liberals to save you? You talk of the mass rallies against the Israeli government, but omit how every major organisation and movement involved in the protests supports the occupation and opposes the right of return. They dislike the current government merely because it is too close to the religious right, not because of its colonial policies.

The mainstream in Israeli society, regardless of political affiliation, is an uncompromising anti-Arab racism; they simply don't want to share the land as equals. Why should Palestinians and Arabs respect an apartheid state that sees them as slaves? Why is the onus on them to be meek and pure in the face of state power?

#anon

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spacelazarwolf · 9 months

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(to your knowledge) are there any genuinely trans affirming versions of ra/di/cal feminism? I've seen a few people here and there on the internet saying Their version of it is trans inclusive but I haven't had the time to do any extensive research..

imo no. ra/di/cal feminism relies on the idea that there is a Victim Group and an Oppressor Group. for traditional ra/df/ems, those groups are based on agab. "females" are victims and "males" are oppressors, and these are immutable categories. if you are female, you are and will always be a victim and nothing you can ever do will change that. if you are a male, you are and always will be an oppressor and nothing you can ever do will change that.

for neo ra/df/ems (tirfs, whatever you want to call them), those immutable categories are "man" and "woman", or sometimes "man" and "nonman." if you are a woman or "nonman", you are and will always be a victim and nothing you can ever do will change that. if you are a man, you are and always will be an oppressor and nothing you can ever do will change that. this ideology appeals to a lot of groups like trans and queer people who were afab that don't align with manhood and also to trans women and trans femmes, because those are groups who understandably have a lot of resentment toward the patriarchy for the trauma it's caused them.

but when you look at the other side of the constructed binary, you have a lot of trans and intersex people (whether that's trans men, trans people who pursue masculinizing transition, trans people who align with manhood regardless of agab, intersex people who choose to align with manhood or are forcibly aligned with manhood because of their intersex traits that are perceived as "male", or trans people who were amab that are forcibly aligned with manhood because of the way they present) who simply do not hold any societal power and are in fact profoundly oppressed under the patriarchy who are now being labeled as oppressors simply because of the way they identify or they way they're forcibly aligned. this can be particularly traumatizing for trans people like me who have a lot of deep trauma from the several decades being perceived as and treated as a woman/"female", because our trauma is usually dismissed as "misdirected" or "not as bad." this incongruence between lived experiences of oppression and perceived status as oppressor further marginalizes these groups; they continue to experience oppression in general society because of their status as "other", but are also turned away from safe spaces because of their perceived status as oppressors, and this leads to high levels of isolation, depression and anxiety, violence, and suicide.

ra/di/cal feminism also holds the idea that misogyny is the one true/most important form of oppression. it asserts that all other forms of bigotry stem from misogyny, so the priority should be to overthrow the patriarchy. which sounds like a noble goal in theory, but in practice what it really looks like is a lot of white women wanting to flip patriarchy on its head so they're the ones in charge instead of white men. and historically white women have had an integral role in maintaining white supremacy, so it's understandable why a lot of people of color, including women of color, reject ra/di/cal feminism.

this presents itself in neo ra/di/cal feminism as well when discussions surrounding gender based oppression and transphobia fail to take race into account. trans men are perceived as transitioning into an Oppressor Group, therefore they must be transitioning into an easier and more privileged life. but black and brown trans men report experiencing more violence after they transition. white trans women's voices are prioritized over trans men of color because one is seen as the Victim and the other as the Oppressor, which results in white voices and narratives being prioritized in trans discussions, and does not take into account the way white women have historically used their whiteness as a weapon against black and brown men.

so in conclusion of this mini essay, i argue that there can never be a form of ra/di/cal feminism that is truly accepting of all trans people because the mandatory binary way of thinking is incompatible with queer and trans existence, and because it is not structured to take race and ethnicity into account which makes it inaccessible to racial and ethnic minorities. intersectional feminism that challenges binaries and targets the system instead of individuals or groups of people will always be more inclusive and successful.

#ask avishai #gender studies #atm #neo rf

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my-my-my · 9 months

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modern Aizen??!! What type of dad would he be? Or husband? What type of life would he have?(job,money,hobbies,etc.)

I love modern Aizen concepts. I've thought so much about this - I have way too many ideas. I'll break this up into chunks for easier reading.

TW: none!

... as a husband:

A very career-oriented, driven man = very busy. There will be some days where you won't physically see him (because your work schedules don't align), but he will call you each day when you have free time.

He's very attentive. He can tell when you're upset, hurt or angry about something, and he'll listen.

He doesn't like nagging and passive aggressiveness. If you're upset with him, be direct! He trusts you and expects you to trust him as well.

He loves cooking with you, especially if you're curious about new recipes, or try something in a restaurant and want to recreate it at home with him.

He doesn't like leaving household chores with you - he tries to meal plan and prep with you. He's the one that offers to hire a cleaner so there's less stress for you.

When he has time off, he will spend it with you. He will plan elaborate, details days off, vacations, anniversaries, etc. - it's his way of "making up" to his intense schedule.

... as a father:

Extremely, and I mean EXTREMELY patient. He may not be all that understanding with his child, but he tries.

I think Aizen "handles" older children better than new borns and infants.

New borns and infants give Aizen a small seed of fear - this tiny, precious child is someone who inherently has to rely on Aizen. I think in this sense, Aizen's philosophy of "the weak need the strong" changes - of course his baby needs him!

Aizen will always, and I mean always, read them bedtime stories. He loves to encourage his child to read more. One of their first gifts from him (once they're old enough/develop memories) is a little bookshelf.

Library days are important! He's one of those parents who will sign up for parent-baby classes at the local library.

Aizen is definitely the "I'm not angry, just disappointed" parent. He won't shout at his child ever, but they develop an inherent respect for him.

I don't think Aizen would like the concept of private schools (inherently classist/elitist), so he's very much fine with his child going to a public school.

Summer vacations are also for travel! He would encourage his child to see the world - he doesn't want them to be ignorant of the world around them.

... his job:

I've talked about this before, but I can see Aizen in some type of medical or education-role (or both!). I often picture him as some kind of psychotherapist (requires a medical degree) at a world-renowned hospital/institute who's also an associate professor at the major university. He would be one of those people who would have the HBSc + MSc + MD + PhD lol

He would also be a graduate-level supervisor for students. But he's very selective on who he takes under his wing (i.e. Ichigo...). He would encourage his students to think critically about what he's teaching them, but also be supportive in their endeavours.

I think Aizen develops his supervisor persona because it was, unfortunately, something he didn't get to experience as a graduate student. His supervisors were very hands-off and while Aizen was an extremely competent student and fellow, I can see him wanting a mentor during that period of his life.

Aizen only sees a few patients a year, on a consultancy-basis, if he's more research-focused. But some years he does go back into the clinical practice route.

Aizen has definitely had a TEDTalk or two.

Aizen is always competing with Urahara for grants and funding lol it pisses him off.

If Aizen is on a thesis committee with Urahara, it frustrates him, but he tries to be nice and polite - often times he's ignoring Urahara in these meetings and at the time of a student's defence.

Aizen would be a notoriously difficult Comprehensive Examiner for PhD students. Again, going back to thinking critically - he expects students in his division/unit/stream to not regurgitate what they've learned, but demonstrate areas of improvement, new techniques, etc.

Aizen teaches one undergrad-level course in psychology, another one in sociology and then one last one in philosophy (at the 300 level). Many undergrad students flock to his office hours.

Overall - financially - Aizen is definitely not hurting for cash.

... his hobbies:

Reading: whether that be manuscripts, chapter proofs, fiction and non-fiction alike. I think Aizen is inherently a student for life type-of-person. He wants to know more, he has such a thirst for knowledge.

Coffee/tea-hopping: he's not one for gimmicky cafes, but Aizen's curious to try new spots for their coffee and tea selections. Even when he travels abroad, he will try local cafes and buy some beans and blends for home (if he likes it).

I think Aizen would still hold on to calligraphy - it's such a rare talent these days I find. It's an expensive hobby for sure - but one he plans and budgets for. Very, very rarely does he sell some of his prints - it's a way for him to decompress.

I think Aizen would be hesitant to introduce his child to calligraphy - he doesn't want them using his expensive inks and pens lol. I think he'd get them a "child" version of them, but he wouldn't pressure them to continue with calligraphy if it doesn't interest them.

In a similar vein, I can see Aizen enjoying playing the piano in his (very limited) spare time (he's trying to master Rachmaninoff and that unbelievably finger span). I don't see him playing the piano necessarily for the music - but rather, I think it's a test of almost all of his senses. It requires his focus, his ability to read music - translate that ability into finger movements, and be able to interpret the composers own feelings into the piece of music. I don't think he'd be able to tell you who his favourite composers were, but he would be able to tell you pieces that gave him a "challenge" (that he conquered). He would enrol his child in piano lessons.

I can see Aizen being into hiking, and maybe mountaineering. I think it gives him a sort of thrill to climb mountains (always reaching to the top).

Weirdly enough, I think he'd be into foraging as well? Foraging for edible mushrooms specifically (I guess there's something to be said with curiosity and mad scientist types).

Aizen avoids social media. He knows of it, he probably has a twitter account for his academic stuff, but that's about it. I also don't see him as a podcast listener - but he has been invited on to podcasts as a guest!

Overall, I think Aizen would have a life similar to a well-known, top-earning clinical researcher! Someone who's constantly learning, but also wants to share that knowledge to a few select students. This leads him to having a very limited home life, but he makes it up with his attentiveness and understanding. I think Aizen would be a devoted partner to a person who is as equally curious as him - someone he can also learn from.

Thanks anon for this ask! I hope this is what you had in mind.

#bleach #aizen sousuke #aizen sosuke #sosuke aizen #sousuke aizen #aizen x reader #aizen headcanon #answered #anonymous #bleach writings

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edenfenixblogs · 2 months

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Hi, I have a question and you seem like a really balanced person, so here goes: I want to join a drag king collective, and I’m so excited about it, but the king leading it has some Interesting views. It’s the kind of thing where it’s constant “fuck Zionists” and what feels like extremely performative activism (Palestinian flag in bio but no actual fundraising/peace efforts, posting misinformation/irresponsible rhetoric etc.) I’m scared that if I join it I’ll be treated different, and even more scared that my friends will think the antisemitism justified (they aren’t great at understanding what antisemitism looks like these days). Idk what to do about the fear of someone being antisemitic because I don’t want it to stop me from doing what I want, but I also know it’ll devastate me if it does happen. If you can offer any insight I’ll be very grateful.

Hi friend!

I'm really glad you reached out to me. Not because I pretend to know all the answers, but because I love that we can all rely on each other during this time.

Unfortunately, whether you sign up for this is ultimately a matter of your own personal priorities and how you are prone to handle confrontation.

Personally, if it was me, I would join. I'm not afraid of defending myself (but I very much used to be, so no shame if you're not there yet). If I wanted to explore my gender identity through performance (if indeed that is what you are doing. I've never been personally drawn to perform drag, so I cannot pretend to know exactly why one might start. But I don't think I'm out of line to assume that it involves some kind of exploration or critique of gender both personally and societally) I certainly wouldn't let antisemites be the reasons I didn't go for it.

If the Anti-Zionist jerk starts coming at you, you can simply say "OK, great. Real quick question: What's a Zionist?" And watch him squirm to say anything real or substantive other than "a Jew." He might say, "They're basically Nazis!" or "They're people who want Palestinians to suffer!" or some other confidently incorrect hyperbolic statement. If he does so, you can say, "Oh! Well, then that's definitely not what I am," and move on.

If he says something slightly more substantive, like, "They're people who think Jews should get to take land from Arabs/Palestinians in order to have a Jewish ethnostate!" You can use the same response as above. But you can also say, "Oh, weird. That's definitely not what I thought it was. Which Zionist Jews have said this, exactly? Cuz I heard it was something completely different." Remember, their goal isn't actually to educate you or help anyone or even to provide limited but factual information. The goal is to shame you into aligning with their self-righteous point of view. That is not an effective tactic when you respond with QUESTIONS instead of outright CORRECTIONS. Making people explain themselves is a great way to defang a bad faith accusation like that.

Finally, they might say, "It's someone who supports Israel." In this case, either of the above methods will work. Or you could question even further. Here's an example of a chat:

You: Supports Israel how?

Jerkface: They want Biden to use our tax dollars to fund a genocide!

You: Oh, well then I'm definitely not a Zionist.

Jerkface: No, you don't understand! It's people who think that Jews can only be safe in a settler colonial apartheid ethnostate that justified its existence by crying about the Holocaust.

You: Well then I'm still not a Zionist. I don't know why you're assuming these things about me. But people should generally cry about the Holocaust. It was really bad thing that people did to Jews. Do you not think the Holocaust is a big deal?

Jerkface: Of course I think it was a big deal. That's why we all have to condemn THIS genocide. The Jews are the Nazis now.

You: I don't know. I don't think that' show Nazism works. But I definitely don't like genocide. If liking genocide makes a Zionist, then I'm definitely not whatever you're accusing me of.

Jerkface: No! I'm just saying that Zionists don't want a ceasefire. They're trying to kill all the Palestinians.

You: I don't know what to tell you then. Because that's still not me. Of course I want Hamas and Israel to both stop bombing each other.

Jerkface: No, Palestine is JUSTIFIED in bombing Israelis because of the oppression.

You: I think its weird that you're conflating Palestinians with Hamas. Are you saying that Palestinian civilians are bombing Israel as as a protest tactic? I thought for sure that Hamas, a terrorist organization, was the group responsible for Anti-Israeli violence. Personally, I've always though that most Palestinians just want to live in peace and don't support terrorism and violence. I don't know why it would harm Palestinians to suggest that both Israel and Hamas should end this conflict diplomatically rather than with violence.

Jerkface: Right! That's why we need to tell Biden to call for a ceaseefire!

You: OK, but I still don't know if you're saying Israel should just stop firing or that Israel and Hamas should stop bombing. I definitely want everyone to stop bombing each other. But I'm not really sure why Hamas would care about what Biden says.

etc...

I call this the "Rabbi method," because when you go to a rabbi, they never really give you an answer to your question. They answer with other questions designed to get them to see their own answer.

Either Hamas is a terrorist group unfairly targeting Israeli civilians and launching bombs into civilian territories--something that is clearly bad and which makes average Palestinian civilians innocent victims (this is the truth btw) that require both Hamas and Israel too lay down their arms. OR Palestinians and Hamas are interchangeable terms and the ongoing oppression of Palestinians have driven them to violent, offensive, armed resistance--which you may or may not agree with as a revolutionary tactic (To be clear, this is NOT TRUE OF PALESTINIANS. PALESTINIANS ARE NOT TERRORISTS AND DO NOT DESERVE TO BE BOMBED). Palestine IS NOT HAMAS. Hamas is bombing Israeli civilians.

Israel is retaliating with extreme force and prejudice against a terrorist organization in a way that is devastating the lives and futures of Palestinian Civilians, who very much deserve for all sides to lay down their weapons and address their mutual grievances diplomatically and responsibly. What is occurring right now is a messy, ugly, brutal war that is killing and traumatizing all civilians in the Levant. And a one-sided ceasefire leaves the side that ceases firing dead. A ceasefire means that EVERYONE must cease firing.

Unless Jerkface has a plan for how to ensure the safety of Palestinian civilians from Hamas that also includes Israeli safety from Hamas, asking for Israelis to simply lay down all their weapons without any guarantee of safety is asking for a nation of mostly Jews to die without putting up a fight. And wanting Arab Israelis and also Jews not to die is not what Zionism means. It's not even what pro-Israel means. That's just called not being violently antisemitic, actually.

Israelis aren't mindless Zionist Nazi Monsters who get off on killing Palestinian babies. Palestinians aren't Noble Savages who have never done anything wrong as individual people and who are inherently morally superior to every single Israeli because they were born Palestinian. Both Israelis and Palestinians are complex, global micro-minorities who have both perpetrated tremendous harm to one another over the course of several decades, and neither group is going anywhere. Neither group deserves for its people to die. Neither group is only "worth helping" if western onlookers categorize them as "innocent" and "good." If someone's activism isn't geared toward respecting the inherent dignity of Palestinians and Israelis regardless of either group's history, then that person is not engaging in activism. If someone is asking you to support that cause because their chosen cause involves perfect cinnamon rolls being targeted by pure evil enemies, then they are not asking you to join them in activism. They are not even asking you to join them in a political reality. What they are asking is for you to join their toxic fandom.

And reducing this conflict down to simplistic fandom rhetoric is not going to help anyone and is frankly offensive to all Jews, Israelis, and Palestinians--all of whom deserve to be seen for the traumatized, suffering, imperfect people they are.

People don't earn support by being good. They inherently deserve support, because they are people.

All that said, maybe it's not emotionally useful for you to engage in this group. Maybe this type of conflict is too much for you. That's OK, too.

And while I would never let antisemitism take away an opportunity for me to fulfill a dream, I will say that my experience of Antisemitism during this time is 100000000% responsible for making me realize that the dreams I had before this experience need to evolve. I no longer wish to be in the town where I live. I wish to be home with my family closeby, because when the chips are down, that's who matters. The idea of moving back to my home state was unthinkable to me before October. Now? I cannot get out of here fast enough. There's nothing I want that is exclusive to my current location anymore. The community I thought I'd built for myself is gone. And while antisemitism didn't take them from me, it sure as fuck showed me that I never had it in thee first place.

If you're going to join this collective, be sure its worth the fight. And if it's not worth the fight, then look for a place that is. Exploring your gender identity freely should not come at the cost of living your ethnic and religious identities openly. Ever.

Don't trade one closet for another. You deserve more than that. We all do.

hope that helps @kit-chaos-doodle

#ask me stuff #kit-chaos-doodle #jumblr #advice #antisemitism #leftist antisemitism

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