#been so moody today

[existing-is-bothersome]

sometimes you gotta let it out. The hair and the feelings.

@koffeeaddiction I used you style as a reference because I don’t trust myself to draw in my own rn. I hope you don’t mind.

#lego monkie kid #lmk #fanart #lmk fanart #redson monkie kid #lmk red son #redson #red son #monkie kid red son #he deserves a hug #he deserves a break #they’ve all been through hell #I was being moody so I drew this #Not my art style Ik but I can’t trust myself with that right now #My brain isn’t being very nice to me today #Mako’s blog #Mako’s art

[dumb-doll-lips]

Considering how like most of my work experience has been IT support related, it feels pretty ridiculous how much I struggled getting my wifi to work again after accidentally turning of the surge protector thing it’s plugged into.

Partly bc I don’t see to know how the surge protectors little switch works, that was confusing. And it’s like a google wifi thing, all through an app. Was getting really confused bc it get finding a device and I’m like idk what it means and would try to add add it. Took me prolly way too long to figure out it’s something a neighbor has. My wifi thingy wasn’t showing up at all. I was trying to look up help and everything was just like factory reset it. But like I already did that and then couldn’t find it to try it again. I have no idea what I did that finally got the app to find it again and from there it was okay. But like it just feels very wow how walking through people stuff like this over the phone has literally been something I’ve been paid for. And I was getting close to crying I was so frustrated. Def made me feel soo dumb.

#personal #dumb things #also like I’ve been a little moody lately so that prolly didn’t help w the almost crying thing #been a weird week and I’ve been grumpy w family thinfs today ans yesterday #also some day I’ll catch up on messages and such

[modernmaenad]

my fucking body deciding its time for my period on the first day of pride month when im also scheduled for a double shift at work is just fucking rude tbh

#like excuse me?? #but at least i have a better understanding of why ive been so fucking moody today #heres hoping i can make it through tomorrow without straight up murdering someone #shhh julie

[spaceradars]

it’s sooooooo hot i hate it here i can’t study like this

#istg i have to have a study break every 15 minutes because i can’t stand the heat !!!!! #and i usually don’t feel the heat that much and it’s been hotter than today but idk #im just moody so it doesn’t help

[queerstudiesnatural]

derealisation kicking my ass lately. been feeling like i've been living three days in one and at least two of them were dreams. what if i went to sleep at 9:30pm to shut my mind up

#ok last moody post of the day i swear #btw i talked about supernatural in therapy today #i've never really been embarrassed to talk about my spn obsession or fanfiction/the poetry collection but i was today #she was asking about my screen time and i said i spend a lot of time on my phone but only on one specific app #and she didn't know what tumblr was so i explained what i do on here and one thing led to another #ended up telling her i wrote a book of poems about my favourite fictional characters from a dark fantasy show

[xythlia]

I say im gonna finish a wip :3 then sit here & go insane on my phone for 4 hours

#i also have insane brain fog & moodiness rn bc the company i get my mail order birth control from #closed w only like 10 hours of notice i woke up to an email saying hey we're closing effective today #like damn thats super unhelpful bc now i have to start all over again #& it was time for my refill so really unlucky I'll probs be ywo weeks w/out birth control which can't wait to see how nuts that makes me #considering ive been taking it since i was 13 #𓏲 ࣪₊ 📎\ rambles

[ramudamemura]

obsessed with how fp doesnt care about how they all have so many secrets bc they know none of them can change how they feel about each other

#and i mean it’s also a mutual respect thing yknow like they won’t pressure each other #i just love how it’s not ‘i’ll still love you no matter what’ it’s more like ‘i love you that’s it’ like ik i’m not explaining myself but. #fling posse #OK IDK ik this is nothing new like this is just how they are but it’s making me v sappy today #i think i’m just extra emotional #bc for one i’m supposed to get my period soon which always makes me Moody #and for two my brother just left for a two week camping trip in an area with barely any cell service #and we’ve never been apart for more than like. idk three days??? and idk what to do with myself #so i’m channeling my emotions and sappy feelings into fp rn bc i’d rather be sappy over them than over someone who i don’t get to see for t #two weeks yknow

[sergeant-angua]

i want you all to know that when you’re nice to me i cry but like in a good way. i want to bake everyone cookies

#BEEN A LIL MOODY TODAY BUT ALSO HAD PEOPLE SAYING NICE THINGS SO!!

[skellizo]

I need food but I am also way too lazy it's way too warm and I hate driving so I guess I am just gonna starve and hope my mom buys some bread on her way home

#I feel like a moody teenager #Could be that the medication I take does have side effects regarding my emotional stability #Todays not my day folks #I have been crying at every minor inconvinience and annoyance so that's also great

[furryfantasies]

debating if i should wake up or just go back to sleep

#miniz rambles #kinda moody #vent #i was trying to draw yesterday and never got any alone time #i highly doubt today will be any different #every single time i sleep and wake up with the intent to have alone time for hours #my family start to wake up and at that point i can kiss any semblance of peace and quiet gone #i dont feel comfortable drawing around most people and yes ive tried to work up the courage i cant do it #all i do is play video games and getting not else done #id probably feel less depressed if i could change it up a bit every once and a while #but i cant cuz of social anxiety i fucking hate it #anyway i feel like going back to bed so that i can finally be left alone for once #but sleeping all day isnt healthy and would probably make me feel even worse #but also i cannot stand being around my family sometimes im so sick of being reminded of my triggers and dont have the heart to tell them #every single day its a battle to fight off thoughts about my ex #and i thought i healed already its been a year #he'd probably tell me to grow up and get over it like he did when he broke up with me #anyway ill shut up now ill probably wake up anyway out of autopilot or whatever or my siblings bug me

[laomelettedufromage]

So apparently when you graduate college, you get to unlock a whole new sleuth of issues depending on what you do or happens after

#hiiiiii making tumblr my diary again<3333 #today is another bad day which I was afraid we were heading here #I think a lot of it is I just got less sleep #and it always seems to get worse on the weekends when everyone is like out partying and doing stuff yknow #anyways I used to be a very independent person who was good at keeping myself from being lonely and bored #but now I’m struggling very hard with both of those things which just feels so DUMB #but while there’s some things I can do to kinda help alleviate the boredom #there’s really nothing I can do for the loneliness at the moment which kinda sucks #and also the loneliness is definitely new #like it isn’t but me identifying it as loneliness is new #I think originally I was chalking it up to jealousy and boredom #and those two emotions are definitely still there #but I don’t think I’m giving loneliness enough credit😅 #which sucks because I’m not technically ALONE… ever #it’s just my coworker doesn’t really fill the hole yknow?? and then I also feel bad for him for that #even though I know that’s not my guilt to take on #but I know I’ve been very moody IM MOODY RIGHT NOW and it’s hard to keep that contained and so some of it gets taken out on him #which feels bad because he doesn’t deserve it AT ALL #and also I really do want to leave a good impression on these people😔 #idk man maybe after I eat I’ll like walk around or something #call one of my roommates #and then maybe start work on sewing my Jean jacket or somethin #it’s going to be a long month and my brain seems determined to make it suck😅 #personal

[simplysummers]

.

#tw sui attempt #this is about to get real ranty and I’ll probably end up deleting this later but I’m really upset #so yesterday my stepdad and i got into an argument because he yelled at me on the stairs because he playfully went to push by me and I #replied completely neutrally with ‘I’m sorry I’m not really in the mood can I get by?’ #he proceeded to shove me and scream about how moody I always am and how I’m the one bringing animosity into the household. he has a habit #this. i got very upset to a point where my older brother had to calm me down outside. he ended up going out and I calmed down #my stepdad has an awful habit of being very rude to people including me both my brothers and even my mom #and I’ve finally snapped. I’m not putting up with it anymore #he is one of the key reasons for my extreme self criticism and I’m not dealing with it now #I’m almost 19 years old. i will not be spoken to like this. #and so today he’s come into my room demanding an apology from me. and I very calmly explained that while I wasn’t going to ruin my moms #birthday (which is on Friday) that we would not be on speaking terms before and after the event until he can admit how he’s treating me is #out of order. he constantly deflects whenever he does something wrong and he can never swallow his pride and apologise #there was an incident in November where he told me it was my fault my mother had anxiety and if she got worse he would blame it on me #because I was ‘crazy’. that same day I left my house and headed straight for our overpass because I couldn’t handle the guilt #i was talked out of it by my bio dad who I called on the phone. he picked me up and held me close and my eyes are welling with tears just #thinking about it. it was a terrifying experience as a suicide survivor from last February #am I out of order for this? wanting respect from the man who has been in my life since I was 3. who is married to my mom who I love with my #whole heart? i keep claiming to not be perfect. I’m my own worst critic and yet he parades himself as the victim because I’m finally #standing up to him #and Idk where to go from here

[messybouquetoflilies]

i'm exhausted

#today felt so shitty for no reason #i feel so insecure #and i really don't know why #i've been doing so good lately #idk i guess some days are just shit #i hate that it makes me feel extra lonely though #like why is it all i want to run to someone.. tell them all my tiny problems.. and cry a little in their arms #that feels so obnoxious #i get so needy and i feel overbearing #i wanna be good & low maintenance but i just can't #hhhhhh and now i'm just rambling #but this is my public diary damnit #i will do what i please #i wanna feel cared for and appreciated #somedayyyy #and dw im fine #just moody

[pears-trinkets]

.

#the whole vet situation gives me such trauma whiplash im too busy with that that i havent really given myself a chance to process today #all i can think about is how painful eating must be for mischa #i noticed she slowed down a bit and wouldnt eat kibble or hard snacks but i thought it might be one single tooth ache idk #i actually thought she was doing better because she slowed down because she has been gulping down food way too fast since the shelter #the last time she had tooth problems like 2-3 years ago i asked a friend to come with me to the vet and she said omg yes of course #and then she resumed texting me normal stuff throughout the day of the appointment and only after i didnt reply the whole day she noticed #like 10 hours too late she was like OH SHIT HAHA!! and this is literally what happens every time when i ask someone to be there for me #when i make myself really vulnerable and ask for help and say that i cant do something alone they let me down #while knowing that i have no one else #i asked my mom to come to the vet once and she literally only talked about herself the whole time distracting me #and then she was like haha yeah lets just drop off the cat at home and go get some lunch hihi!!!! #she never remembers vet appointments even when we just talked about them and loves making fun of me for being stressed and tense #like OH NO WONDER YOU WERE MOODY like im on my period or something #i texted a friend about mischas health issues and me losing my job and she hasnt replied since january and doesnt really talk to me anymore #so i guess that friendship is done too #ill have to go there on thursday alone and overdraft my account and wait until the evening and care for mischa all alone #i cant even talk with someone about this because no one understands or judges my emotions and no one cares anyway #and then ill have to go back to work where everyone knows that i will be gone soon and will pester me about it #they all think of me as a temporary intern anyway and ask WHEN WILL YOU GO FIND A REAL JOB while they make me do theirs #everything and everyone at that job is so horrible and so many people leave and they never learn #a colleague i helped teaching everything suddenly turned on me &my other colleague & made our lives miserable while badmouthing us viciously #and everyone in the office chose her over us and let her get away with it while she screamed at us and behaved like a child #its so ironic how i stayed because i needed money to live and now when i go i will have 0 because of the surgery #i mean its worth it but like #what the fuck is life and what will it fucking be next month

[gongedtornado]

.

#im so fucking hungry im moody im irritated im in pain im almost 100% certain im about to start that time of the month and all i wanna do is- #eat and go to sleep or maybe go out and do things but noooo #im so understimulated and hrbrggrr #its too warm in here i wanna blow up #everything is irritating the piss out of me rhhghghrh #im sure a good meal will resolve it all but >:( #uuuughhhh #and its my first weekend in a while where i actually have sunday off and i wanted to do things with my family and ive just been stuck in a #car for awhile and im getting agitated as all fuck #im probably just hungry or hormonal as all fuck. or maybe its the fact i forgot to take my meds last night but rgghrrghhggr #BARK BARK BARK BARK #/neg #kazzy complains #yeah no im just stupidly moody today.