#been weirdly productive lately

[izzy-b-hands]

So...idk on this one tbh. My best explanation is: I watched the Lighthouse, Annihilation, and got extremely stoned tonight.

As a result, we have the crew of the Revenge wrecked on a small island with a seemingly malfunctioning lighthouse considering it has no light going out. Some looting occurs, talk of repairs occurs, some frotting between Ed and Stede occurs, then things get a little creepy and gross and sci-fi-ish and weird, but in an unsettling A24 movie kinda way.

Please note the TWs below because I leaned harder than usual into the psychological horror and violent pirate life in bits of this, so those are fairly well described and I don't want anyone to get taken by surprise in reading. Like... I'm struggling to describe but you know how art housey A24 type movies handle topics like the ones below, and it isn't always grossly graphic but feels unsettling regardless? That's the vibe in this fic that applies heavily to the TWs.

TW: body horror, graphic descriptions of violence, death, sex/NSFW

---

"If this wasn't terrible, the irony would be funny."

The Revenge was not wholly destroyed, but she wasn't going anywhere else without major repairs. Wet rocks glittered through the holes they'd punched in her hull, illuminated by what little moonlight struck them.

The only light for miles, including the lighthouse that should have saved them.

Stede nodded, and let himself lean against Ed. "It is ironic. It could be funny. But look at her, Ed..."

She was the ship he'd dreamed up and drew designs for himself, that he'd hoped would outlive him and might carry another pirate crew someday. Sure, with repairs she would sail again. But she'd never be the same, and he'd worry even more about her now.

Ed hugged him close. "I know. She'll bounce back once she's bandaged and cleaned up though. No sense standing around staring though. We'll go into that lighthouse, rest until sun up, maim the lighthouse keeper for letting their light lapse and fucking up our ship, and then maybe breakfast before we start repairs."

The crew had already started exploring the lighthouse and her outbuildings: a small empty cabin a few yards away, a shed, and the uncertain remnants of something else, of which only a few half buried bricks remained in the mire and muck.

"All empty," Olu said as they approached the door to the lighthouse itself. "If anyone was here it was ages ago."

"You can't just abandon a lighthouse," Ed scoffed. "Completely defeats the point of it to have it sitting here in the dark. Literally, you would need another lighthouse to warn of the not lit up first lighthouse, and that's just fucking weird."

"Be that as it may, there is no one here except us," Olu said. "Check yourselves! Plenty to loot anyway: some books, clothes, blankets, knick knacks. Don't think anyone else is coming back for them, so we may as well."

True to his words, the lighthouse and the small quarters she housed were cluttered even after the crew's initial looting.

"Unsettling here, isn't it?" Stede asked as they perused the dusty books crammed into too full shelves.

"Dunno, a little?" Ed replied, handing a slim volume to Stede. "But we also wrecked here in the middle of the night, and anywhere you wreck at night feels creepy. Come morning it'll be another boring empty island with a negligent keeper we need to hunt down.

"You're really upset about that, aren't you?"

"Absolutely; they could have gotten us killed! And what for? We don't even know, because there's not so much as a sign of them. Probably hiding somewhere, the first smart decision they've made," Ed growled. "If they're really smart, then they'll keep hiding until we leave."

Stede sighed, and opened up the book Ed had handed him. "Oh! Handwritten poetry, that's lovely. Wonder if the keeper wrote this, bet he did. Probably not much else to do out here."

He tucked it under his arm, instead of placing it on the pile of new books they would be taking with them. It didn't feel quite right, to toss it aside.

Back outside, Izzy and Olu were going over repair plans with the rest of the crew, now worn out of searching the small island for treasures she didn't contain.

"I'm so proud of them," Stede murmured as they walked past. "They don't even need us; they've got things under control! I love it."

"All the better for us," Ed agreed. "Could go fuck in that cabin."

"Why? Not that I'm against the idea, but it doesn't seem all that structurally stable."

The wooden boards of the cabin creaked and groaned in the wind, as if in agreement with Stede's assessment.

Ed shrugged. "Just to say we did. Check it off the list of odd places we can say we fucked."

"Wouldn't be a bad one," Stede nodded. "But what about one cooler?"

He pointed to the top of the lighthouse. "Probably not many people can say they fucked in the lantern room of a seemingly abandoned lighthouse, hm?"

Ed grinned. "You're right; that is cooler. Let's go."

The crew paid them no mind as they dashed by again, this time giggling and kissing until they got to the staircase of the lighthouse.

There, it simply wasn't possible to keep that up: the stairs took one's breath, and were too tight to walk up them side by side.

"Yeah, we're only doing this once," Ed sighed raggedly as they made their way into the dark lantern room. "Fuck stairs."

"Can't complain too much, that's good cardio," Stede said, but his legs cramped as he sat down on the cold floor, tossing the poetry book aside nearby. "Ed?"

Ed groaned as he made his way to the floor by Stede. "Yeah?"

"Should be a lens up here, right? Or something to make a light, some source for that..."

Ed followed his gaze to the empty center of the room. "Huh."

"Right? That's odd, isn't it? Can't be a lighthouse without a light source."

"Usually how that goes."

They peered for another moment into the empty air, as if a lens would suddenly pop out of nowhere, and the light would blind them. Beyond the smeared and dusty glass, the clouds had covered the moon again.

"Maybe we should try and fit everyone up here," Ed said after another moment. "Once we're done, of course. But until light, until we can get repairs started..."

"You feel it," Stede said. "Something is off here, aside from this being arguably the worst lighthouse in existence. Like being watched."

"We're horny, tired, and worked up over the wreck," Ed said. "It's probably just that. But still, I'd rather we keep the crew together, and not outside for the rest of the night."

It was lazily erotic, comfortable even in unfamiliar surroundings. Ed's lips found his, a hand at the back of his head even as they adjusted to lay on the floor, Ed already grinding against him-

The eyes dangled. From red, pink, and white tissue, like ribbons holding up an ornament. They stared, unseeing, grey blue.

"Ed."

Ed's eyes were closed. "I don't know if we want to get undressed for this. Too fucking cold up here for it."

"Ed," Stede tried again.

The keeper, for it had to be the keeper, surely, was pasted to the ceiling. Seemingly by their own mashed flesh, exposing white bone.

"But then again, we'll warm each other up," Ed giggled as his eyes fluttered open. "I promise I'll keep going with the rest in a moment, feels too good to stop for now."

His hips hadn't stopped moving, in a constant search for as much friction as possible between them.

Stede made eye contact past Ed, with the keeper. "I'm fine even if this is all we do. We'll make a mess of our trousers, but we can run back to the ship for new ones."

His heart had already been beating fast due to Ed in his lap, but it sped up more now.

Ed leaned down to kiss and bite gently at his neck, moaning with every new point of contact.

"Serves them right," Stede said as his hands continued their usual wandering, past Ed's open jacket under the edge of his shirt, to trace his nails over Ed's bare skin until they both shivered. "Having to know we're defiling their lighthouse."

"What?" Ed giggled.

"What I meant about watching, being watched," Stede continued, though he realized he wasn't making nearly as much sense as he wanted to be. He was harshly distracted, between his cock throbbing and the obscene and animal need to keep eye contact with the keeper. He'd never felt anything like it before, even during his and Ed's wildest nights prior.

"I want them to see us. To watch us do this and raid their home and do with it all what we will. They very nearly killed us," Stede kept on, verbally and with his teasing of Ed, hands moving to run over the tight warm leather covering Ed's ass. "And we could do so much worse to them than this if we wanted."

"Tell me what you'll do with them," Ed murmured, his breath warm on Stede's neck. "When we find them, wherever they are on this fucking rock."

Stede gave himself a moment of less control, his hips rutted up against Ed and he knew if any of the crew had come inside the lighthouse, then they had probably sussed out what they were doing from the echoing sounds.

He let himself blink, but each time he expected he'd open his eyes to find the keeper was blinking too.

"I'd tie them to that chair we found downstairs," Stede began.

"The one with the nice carvings or the ugly ones?"

"Ugly one, because we're taking the nice-looking one with us," Stede replied. "And drag them up here with you. Start by telling them exactly how they nearly killed us all, and ask them what on earth would possess them to leave any ships, pirate or not, to be dashed on the rocks with no light here."

Ed hummed happily. "Will I finally get to see you put a dagger through a man's eye?"

"You will, and I want your hands on me when I do it. I want them to see it isn't just revenge we're getting out of this."

"Slut," Ed teased, then winced. "Sorry, knee."

"Here, you slip beside me, like that," Stede instructed softly as he helped Ed move. "There, leg up over mine, you can grind on my thigh there-"

They wiggled about for another moment, readjusting until Ed could successfully stretch out his bad knee, grind against Stede's thigh, and tease Stede's cock by hand through his silk trousers.

"Where were we?" Stede asked as he relaxed into Ed's touch. Thus far, Ed hadn't looked up to see the keeper. He couldn't decide if he wanted Ed to see them or not.

"You've just shoved your dagger into one of their eyes," Ed said lovingly. "I'm behind you, cock pressed against your ass, hands wandering. Listening to them scream."

"Perfect. After that, we play it by ear. If we want to keep toying with them, we do. Can take turns with daggers and swords and if we can find one, a snail fork," Stede smirked. "Or we can tease them another way. Ask if they wouldn't like to join us for the night, to relieve some of the loneliness that must come with the job. Aren't they starving for even the slightest touch?"

"Fuck," Ed was barely audible.

Above them, the keeper stared down. It felt like a challenge, and Stede kept his gaze locked with the keeper's.

"But they won't get that touch. Not from us. They can try and get themselves off watching us, but that's it. You're all mine; I'm all yours, and I want them to want it so badly for themselves it aches."

"Stede-"

"I know," Stede gasped and pulled Ed in for a deep kiss. "Do you want to see them?"

He broke the kiss, and Ed's head turned up enough to see.

"What the fu-" Ed groaned and thrust hard against Stede, words slipping away as he came.

Stede worked hard to keep his eyes open as much as possible when he followed a moment later, with Ed still moaning and whimpering into his neck.

--

They lay side by side on the floor, naked, clothes stripped off and abandoned after being used to clean up some.

"How long do you think they've been up there?" Ed pondered out loud.

Stede shrugged. "Probably no way to know for sure. Especially considering something or someone other than themselves put them up there."

They shivered simultaneously, half from the cold and half from the thought.

"We need to go back down, get new clothes, and get the crew up here," Ed sighed. "Shall we?"

Stede nodded, and they slowly gathered themselves up: clothes folded up and draped over arms, the poetry book in one of Stede's hands.

Outside, it was still pitch black. And the crew was nowhere to be seen.

"Think they went back onboard?" Stede asked as he peered into the night. "We told them that probably wasn't safe and not to do that!"

"No," Ed said softly. "Look."

They were gathered in a bunch at the empty cabin. From around them, a bright white light shone out of it.

"Oh," Stede said. "That's...maybe we would be safer to all go back onboard. Should we? I think we should. Let's get the crew-Everyone! Let's go! Back to the ship, quickly!"

But no one moved, and it wasn't clear if they couldn't, wouldn't, or were too afraid to.

"Alright, that's enough of this," Stede sighed and handed his clothes and the book to Ed. "You keep an eye on these, and I'll wrangle in the team."

Said team didn't so much flinch when he walked by them to the door of the cabin. He met their eyes and could confirm now fear was very much involved. Even for Izzy and Buttons, who he'd expected would have broken free of any panic by now.

The light should have been hot, or seemed it should have been. Instead it was icy, painfully cold.

"We're all hallucinating," Stede said, and found he could suddenly hear the light as well, and had to shout to be heard over it: a high pitched grating whine that made one's teeth ache. "There's a term for group hallucinations, but I can't recall it now! Anyway, we need to get back to the ship!"

He heard Ed run up behind him and felt him pulling him by the arm back away from the cabin. Once at a safe distance, he watched Ed do the same with each crew member. Long hair whipped by the angry forceful gales, leather trousers only half done up and sitting loosely on his hips.

He smelt the burning wood of the cabin, but it didn't register as acrid or painful to breathe in. It glowed from the light, silver blue and dancing, arcing from beam to beam.

Beside him, the poetry book lay open to the latest entry:

What would it be

To be the last living thing on the beach

Of the last beach

The last grains of sand the last shell

Sharp and shattered underfoot

I have seen her glory there

Bright and shrill and beautiful

Like bloody terror

How beautiful

I will howl for the sirens

To lift me on their voices to her embrace

And our rocks will be awash in the blood

Of gouged feet from shattered shells

On the last grains of sand

On the last beach

#text post #ofmd fic #now i have some french fries i need to eat because otherwise im gonna be consumed by thoughts of taika as Ed in my lap a la this fic #and that's probably not the most productive line of thought to pursue rn lmaooo #blackbonnet #also my thanks to anyone who gives this a go #even if u only read a sentence and are like nah no thanks i still really appreciate the view #I've been weirdly nervous to share fic for the fandom lately so even just knowing ppl might give it a half go makes me happy

[hyewka]

i seriously need some sub soob🫢

like imagine him squirming and whining because you ONLY kissed his red tip thats leaking precum ehishsisidjdd im going insaneeee

warnings; sub!soobin obvi, sort of pervy, best friends who fuck each other (fwb), puppy pet name, big dick soob, slapping ?? balls??, gets a boner from cleavage, soobin is extra sensitive down there and cums a lot

When Soobin invited you over to his dorm, you don’t exactly expect to have nothing but your phone to turn to as he simultaneously gets worked up over some video game he’s playing and ignores you all around. You should’ve guessed this was going to happen, but you’re bitter about it anyway.

Is it a crime to have thought that he was implying something else by inviting you over?

“I’m bored.” you whine for the umpteenth time, your thumb with no thought scrolling through your feed of posts you’ve already liked and reposted.

When he doesn’t even spare a glance, you scoff and resort to a kick at his back—which to your credit, gets him to adjust his headset and look back to you.

“Yeah?” he mouths, not having heard you before.

You can’t help but think he looked cute today, his pinkish lips and the hair over his eyes making him look even more of a puppy, but before you could even get a word out, his eyes suddenly widen at the faint yell you could hear from his headset, immedietley turning around has he aggresively spams buttons on his controller in panic.

“Holy shit dude, get off my ass I looked away for one—”

You groan into his pillow, making sure to make it as dramatic as possible, proceeding to sulk right after. This was not a productive use of your time. Fifty entire minutes of laying on his bed as he plays a video game. The switch out of your sport bra for a push up right before you came over really is doing nothing for you right now.

When you hear a string of curses spilling out of his mouth, you look over your shoulder curiously and see that his screen was in spectator mode. “You lost?”

He groans, taking off his headset completely, his mic muted. “Mhm, got killed. What’s up though?”

You take note of the screaming now louder from his headphones. Probably at him for getting eliminated. You don’t let him be though, exhaling dramatically looking back to your phone, “What’s up is your bestest, number one, most treasured, hottest friend is horny, sexually frustrated, and bored out of their mind.”

Soobin chokes on practically nothing at the casual mention of you being horny. It’s dumb, like he’s a middle school boy with no experience.

He really was not used to the ‘thing’ between you guys, like, at all. The stolen kisses (which is to be noted very quickly turn into full blown makeout sessions) when no one’s looking, the occasional need to send pics of his hard on to you, slight panic and regret settling in when he sees the ‘read’ receipt with no sign of a response for an entire five minutes (are you not in the mood? did you hate it? will you stop what you guys have going on?), or even the late night calls when you decide to facetime him instead of responding to his blurry nudes through text, and then…well, phone sex seemed to be a normal standard of your friendship. Weirdly enough.

Even if by now you’ve fucked him well over a few times that a mere mention of feeling horny shouldn’t have gotten him as flustered as it just did. But it’s so sudden, the shift from being friends who strongly, and vehemently denied of the secretly dating rumors to…secretly fucking.

“Oh yeah?” comes out a lot more in a loser way than he intended because he basically chokes it out. He’s never been nervous around you, save for the beginning of your friendship.

You’re very much aware of how unjusted Soobin is to the sudden change in your dynamic. Even you think it’s odd that the person you end up texting when you get…needy is Soobin.

Soobin was never the guy you’d think of starting anything even remotely sexual with.

You’ve known him since the years of being taller than him, and you’ve come to learn about his many deep faults along with gross habits you would never let fly under the radar if from someone else, so for him to be the exact type of man you’ve been seeking lately in bed is, well, surprising.

He seems to be the only person who can satisfy you nowadays. But you try not to show it too much, basking much more in how easily he gets flustered. It’s adorable.

“Yeah,” you sigh, shifting position from your stomach to your back and after much contemplation, deciding to take the chance of sitting up straight, “Did you really invite me over to watch you game? You know I don’t play video games.”

You don’t miss the way his eyes trail down, for sure because your chest was in full view now, his tongue prodding out just a tiny bit to wet his lips, almost like out of instinct. That dog. You show a bit of cleavage and he’s already drooling.

To be fair, it is the exact reaction you were fishing out of him. So you’re definitely not complaining.

You end up stifling a laugh, to which he immediately catches like he’s been trained to know your laughs on cue, breaking him out of his daze—an awkward coughing fit delayed a few seconds after to distract from the fact that he thinks he might’ve been caught, blush quickly warming his cheeks. “You think they’re silly, yeah, I know.

“But they’re—they’re not!” he splutters out, “I thought if you watched me play with Beo—”

“Were you just staring at my tits?” you cut him off with half the ability to not just start laughing. It’s worth seeing Soobin’s eyes widen like a cartoon character.

“No!” he says immediately— the crack of his voice doing nothing to help you keep a straight face. See? Adorable.

Then he huffs out a scoff like he’s surprised you’d ever accuse of him of such scandalous behavior. “Just because we fuck doesn’t mean I want to do you every second of the day. I respect you.”

It’s like a game of your cocked brow calling bullshit (more on the fucking thing than respecting you) and him staring back just as intensely as if he truly was not just ogling at your chest. Okay then, fair enough. You’ll get him to break. And admit to it.

“So if I did this…” you unbutton one of the two buttons of your crop top, and your eyes intently watch the way he struggles to not watch your every movement, still keeping his eyes on your face.

Stubborn. You can work with that. He won’t last long.

You drag the unbuttoning of the second one, and when it finally pops out, it’s a full view of your cleavage, cool air of the A.C being the cause of the goosebumps appearing.

And you’re right. He doesn’t last long. Barely even five seconds.

“My eyes are up here idiot.”

He doesn’t even try to hide the blushing anymore, once again licking his lips. You can see the bob of his adam apple when he finally meets your eyes. “Can I see your tits?” he says—the shame of asking is something that overtime became a numbing feeling, because with each time you casually lift your shirt at his request, the easier it gets to push down the feeling of being a pervert.

You break into a wide grin at how easy and straightforward he was—a passing thought of hoping he’s not like, like this for every living thing with fatty tissue on their chest. It’s not jealousy, god no, but it’s better if this was only between you two… for safety reasons?

You pretend to ponder on it but he should know by now that the enjoyment you get out of teasing him is way greater than any feeling.

You decide on what you’ll say, an evil smirk making way. “Am I just a pair of breasts Soobin? Just for you to ogle at? I thought you respected me.”

He shuts his eyes, whining at seeing that his words were very quick to bite him in the ass. “Please. You know I’ll be good.” he whispers the last few words and that has an affect on you. Big one.

Because he isn’t lying. Soobin’s very obedient. And god, you love it. So much.

But you don’t show that, you never do—letting him chase after something for once. Maybe if he gets a little more desperate, you’d think about a quick flash. “You have plenty of my nudes saved, can’t you jerk off to those? Y’know, like you usually do.”

Is it fair to make a jab at the occasional, every so often muffled voice messages in response to even just a slightly revealing picture that you’re asking him the opinion of, where you could hear his unstable breathing and the wet sounds of his pre cum covered shaft? Probably not, especially when you also get off of pics he’d unknowingly send to be the most delicious, mouth watering photo you’ve seen yet.

Soobin, on the other hand, is like, sure he’d go insane. Ever since he was allowed to look at you in the not-only-friends way, he took up every chance you dangled in front of him like a dog with a bone. Showing a little bit of your cleavage? His mind’s running to images. Just thinking of kissing and sucking until your tits go sore makes him so shamelessly a pervert. Seeing the head of his cock disappear between your tits when you took it upon yourself that one day of giving him a taste of what a titty fuck was like—god, it’s forever embedded into his memory.

He still sulks over the fact that you didn’t let him take a video.

Suddenly his well fitted sweats have easily become the most suffocating piece of clothing, his bulge shy of peaking through the fabric and making an obvious imprint. He tries to not look like a sore desperate loser, to look just a tiny bit cooler, but you make it so hard that he’s willing to get on his knees. Like seriously.

You’re back on your phone, looking to be disinterested which makes him bite the insides of his cheeks—already overthinking. Were you mad that he asked to see?

He tentatively puts a hand on your ankle, gauging at least some sort of reaction. You give him that—a glance. “Sorry if like, um— I didn’t invite you just for games obviously— well, okay not ‘obviously’ but I, uh, also don’t think you’re like, a floating pair of…breasts or something.” You cock a brow, really curious of where this Soobin ramble of the day would go.

“You’re my bestest friend—is that corny to say? Shit, well, you are and I think you’re smart, and obviously really funny, and bright and so pretty, like, really pretty and I mean—”

“Soobin where the fuck are you?”

You both look at the headset next to him on the bed, the yelling loud enough to transcend the reason the product was made anyway. He looks back to you and you could tell he intends on finishing his monologue. “And I mean—” he starts again before cursing under his breath at the second time he gets cut off.

“Fucking cuck, are you ignoring us?”

He groans at the stupid item, as if it just ruined a critical moment. Then he looks back at you apologetically. God, he hopes you don’t leave. “Um, well I have to keep playing they’d kill me if—” he panics a little trying to explain but you’re on another train of thought entirely, thinking that this was perfect timing.

“It’s okay, keep playing!” You say, practically gleaming.

His facial expression is a mix of skeptical confusion and desperation. But instead of questioning your enthusiasm, he bites down on his lip for a second. “You—you won’t leave, right? Don’t leave. Please.”

You shake your head, mouthing an ‘I won’t’ and finally, he lets out a breath of relief he didn’t know he was holding in.

He doesn’t know why he’s so desperate for you to stay. It’s not like you don’t see each other, like every day of the week or even call each other when you somehow don’t. But regardless he wants you to stay, and he doesn’t mind coming off desperate for once.

The situation at hand is too obviously right in your face.

His ramble that was cut off short by who you made out to be none other than Beomgyu, and then Heeseung was…kind of sweet.

No, it was sweet. He thinks you’re really pretty? Not just pretty but really pretty. And smart? And funny? He’s so cute holy shit you could just reach out to pinch his rosy cheeks. But you didn’t and you probably won’t. Because something else caught your attention.

His bulge.

It was too…out there for you to not subtly look down every few filler word Soobin mumbled. You’re not sure what got him to pop a full blown boner. The teasing? You only said a few sentences and showed modest reveal of your boobs. But nevertheless, you try really hard to bite away a smile because holy shit, he really is easy.

And it fucking turns you on. More than it should. And more than it would if it was any other person.

If you felt horny before, you were basically drenched when getting a glimpse of his wide eyes at seeing you on the carpet, on your knees as you’re face to face with his crotch. He seems to freeze for a second before he quickly works to get his headset off, trying to abandon the game completely.

“No.” you say sternly, grabbing his dick through his sweats, “Keep playing.”

He mouths a big ‘what’, nearly whisper shouting, his eyes bulging out. You simply shrug, feeling all too smug, and start to palm him over the fabric. He lets out a sigh of pleasure, shutting his eyes.

“Dude, why the hell are you not moving? Fuck’s wrong with Soobin today?” You hear someone yell.

“If you stop, I stop.” You mouth slowly, and he seems to catch it, hands shaking as he reluctantly picks his controller up again.

“You’re evil.”

To that, you give him a smile, not really denying it. Because maybe you were, knowing how sensitive he is.

You hope Soobin’s mic is as shitty as you’ve heard Hueningkai complain a multitude of times, because if not, he’ll have a very hard time on call with his friends from now on. Or maybe not. Maybe it’s a bragging point to have a girl suck you off while playing video games.

You imagine it’d still be a bit awkward anyway.

“How come you’re so big?” you whisper, more to yourself than him, but he catches it, and still reacts, bucking his hips to your touch, groaning. You click your tongue, pushing him down with one hand, as a warning.

“Don’t move. Don’t take your hands off the controller. And don’t make a sound.” It doesn’t take him long before he nods, obediently fixating his eyes on the tv screen.

You coo at how hard he narrows his eyes, thumbs working its action—but you want him to break. Maybe you really are evil.

And maybe he already was breaking.

He spreads his legs more and more, before lifting his ass off the mattress, already impatiently needy.

“Touch me.” he whispers, only for you to hear.

You raise a brow, huffing out a laugh as you decide that maybe you should stop playing around and pull his sweats down to his ankles. You don’t waste a second to.

When you take in the state of his cock, your mouth could water just at how pretty it looks. You’ve seen it well over a dozen times—over pics, over facetime, in real life, but you’re never not in awe each time. His slit was already bubbling precum, the thickness of his dick eye widening— It’s not like you have small hands either, and yet you still can’t fully wrap your hand around him. You don’t think you’ll ever get used to his size.

And god his tip was swollen red you’re sure if you just so briefly touched it he’d spasm and jizz all over your face. So you’re gentle. Or at least, you make an attempt.

Promptly grabbing his dick again, you could feel him grow heavier when you let it sit on your hand for a second. Soobin sighs into his mic, no doubt briefly catching the attention of his friends.

“Soobin, you’re dripping.” you comment, eyes following the trail of cum running down his length to your hand. It’s more in amusement, how he’s basically on the verge of an orgasm without much from you.

You could tell he’s using his last bits of patience to not just outright fuck into your fist, and it fascinates you. You start slowly dragging your hand on his shaft, made easier to navigate with his ridiculous amount of pre cum working as lube.

You watch as he adjusts his position subtly a few times, knowing that he’s trying to keep from slipping out any whines, pursing his lips. But his eyes betray him, they looked distant—not focused. “How many kills?” you ask.

“Zero.”

You furrow your brows, pouting as you still your hands. “I’ll speed up with each kill. You have to win for me puppy or I’ll get sad.”

Soobin doesn’t know exactly how he’d aim let alone manage a kill with the way you grip the base of his cock, but he knows that despite the sincerety of your words, he doesn’t like to think that you’d get sad. He so badly wants to make you proud in some way, happy with that glint in your eyes.

So, he gets a kill.

You hear the comments from his friends, passing compliments and you smile, slowly working your hand. “Got a kill.” he says under his breath, trying his hardest to not fall into the urge of shutting his eyes. Because god, you were good.

“Yeah? For me? Get another one puppy.”

A new fire ignites in his chest as he spams buttons, yearning to hear a praise slip from your lips. The way he knits his eyebrows in concentration and had his tongue peeking out was so adorable you almost lose control. Almost.

His breathing picks up as he says, “Another one.”

You get the confirmation he’s saying the truth by his friends again and you start moving your hand unfathomably fast as a reward, your hand getting sticky. “Gooood boy, getting all the kills.”

The sudden speed gets to Soobin, faltering his streak as he holds back choked up groans, head quickly becoming light. “Too much, too much.” he whispers, soft moans slipping through his breathing. You catch the way his hands loosen its grip on the controller and you smirk.

He’s way too easy to break.

“Too much? Should I stop?”

He shakes his head again, this time more frantic. You could make out the sparkly tears threatening to spill—you’re all too familiar with this. “Please don’t.”

“Then what? What do you want me to do?” you ask slowly, wet sounds of your hand working at his dick so dirty.

“Mouth,” he sighs, not controlling the way his hips buck into your hands despite your disapproval. “Want you to put it in your mouth.”

You almost laugh—your mouth? Last time, he barely lasted a second. You’re not doing that. But you’ll tease him about it regardless.

“Put what in my mouth?”

He doesn’t waste a breath. “Cock. My cock.”

You’re not even sure if he muted his mic by now, but the way he says it in that needy, desperate broken voice is so sinful you’re surprised you haven’t jumped his bones. Too bad you won’t give him what he wants—or at least not completely.

You rub your thumb over the head of his dick, dribbles of pre-cum still messily spurting from his slit. He’s not paying attention to the game—no, his eyes were focused entirely on you. You would scold him, but you’re entirely too aroused by the way his mouth basically waters in anticipation.

You maintain eye contact when you dip your head down slowly, an experimental kitten lick on his tip and he immediately thrusts his hip, dick slipping past your lips. You pull back, expecting that exact reaction—and he whimpers. Whimpers.

It’s not hard to pick up on the screaming from his headset, his friends clearly pissed off that hes been in the same spot for well over a minute now, becoming an easy kill to enemies on the other team. “Puppy, how come you’re losing? I thought you were doing well.”

Before he could respond, you tighten your grip on his shaft, and he groans, trying to bite down the noise—maybe he didn’t mute it after all. It’s almost animalistic how he chases your hand.

But you’re not as forgiving now—misbehaving boys get punished. You lick the underside of his dick, dragging the flatness of it up to his head, saltiness of his pre-cum overpowering your tastebuds before pulling back to see Soobin has basically abandoned the game, head thrown back as both his hands grip the sheets under him, letting out broken pitched moans.

You smile, knowing you gave him the impression that you’d put him in your mouth. No, you’re here to have your fun. He peeks through an eye at feeling you do nothing more, and the moment he does, you slap—hard. Maybe a tad bit harder than you intended.

Your aim was his nutsack, balls full of cum you could see he was holding from the week you’ve challenged him to not jerk off, and god—the way his eyes fly open, jaw slacking as his legs spasm, letting out a sound you’ve never heard a man make— you wonder why you haven’t done this sooner.

“You didn’t get off like I told you to right? Good puppy.” He nods frantically, his vision fogging.

He looks so broken, tears streaming down his cheeks faster than you could even take notice of. If his friends didn’t hear him before, they definitely heard him now. He’s a hiccuping mess, nose running when you decide to give him a little more, swirling your tongue around his tip, warm in your mouth— then you pull back before he loses control and starts fucking your mouth.

“Puppy can’t talk? Your friends know how much of a whore you are now…isn’t that embarrassing?” you coo, your hand still jerking him off. “What would they say knowing you’re my little mutt, obeying each and every word like a dog in heat?”

The words are getting to him. He tried to keep quiet for the sake of his pride— anyone knowing how desperate he gets for you is a hit to his ego, it’s embarrassing the amount of things he’d do just for a chance of eating you out, but this spurs him on— having you degrade him, telling him what exactly he is to you. Your obeying dog.

You could see his lips quivering, and notice the tensing of his body. Quickly, you part your hair to the side, take him in your mouth all the way, trying to relax your throat as to not gag when your nose finally presses against his abdomen—but of course you do, it’s hard not to with how thick he is. It doesn’t take a milisecond before you feel his load spilling down your throat, his big hands moving to hold the back of your head, orgasm crashing down like waves of the pacific came over him.

You stay there for a few more seconds, feeling yourself get lightheaded with how much he manages to cum, and even when you pull away with a need to take a deep breath, you see that his dick was still spurting little bits. “Holy shit.” you say under your breath, slightly coughing as you wipe away at the semen that managed to dribble down your chin.

Soobin had a lot stored.

Soobin falls backwards on the bed, chest heaving up and down, trying to catch his breath, some of his hair plastered to his forehead and his temple. There’s a lot of thoughts spinning in his head. And he doesn’t exactly know how to label them. Lazily, he takes his headset off, throwing it to god knows where.

“Hey. Question.”

“Yeah?”

“Do you fuck other people?”

You perk up at the question, the randomness making you stay silent for a bit until you shrug. “No, not really.”

Soobin sighs. He doesn’t know why. Was it relief? Maybe. Probably.

“Do you?” you ask it almost timidly, unknowingly playing with the threads of your ripped jeans. Thank god to Soobin because he answers quickly, not allowing for any space of anxiousness.

“No. Only you.”

You slowly nod, pursing your lips. “Cool.”

“Yeah, very cool,” then his brows furrow at a thought popping up in his head, “Wait, do you like,”

You raise your brows. “Do I what?”

“Like, you know, suck off other guys?”

You scoff, he’s so ridiculous. You don’t even get to see his reaction to your answers, as you’re sitting on the floor and his back is on the mattress. “No Soobin, I don’t suck off other guys. Well, not as of recently. You’re the only one I’ve been doing this with.”

“Oh, o-okay.” You snort at the cute stutter.

Too bad you don’t catch the small ‘good’ he says under his breath.

note: when i checked the word count I was so shocked we’re keeping that a secret 😭 appreciate any feedback!

#txt smut #soobin smut #sub!soobin #sub!idol #txt hard hours #txt hard thoughts #soobin hard thoughts #soobin hard hours

[littlecornerinbrooklyn]

me, someone who fully knows they have summer seasonal affective disorder: why has June been such a tough month for me?

#mental health is such a trip #because knowing you have something and then understanding your actions through that lense as they're happening #rather than just retroactively takes like time and practice?? #sounds fake but okay #todays been so weirdly tough on my anxiety and then i was like...oh I'm just exhausted because my nervous system has been at a TEN #for weeeeeks without me really realizing it because you know what i stick to morning routines like glue and if I'm productive on paper #that means everythings alright doesn't it? #oh it doesnt? #the whole time?? #anyway! #that first lense should be spelled lens #too late to change it whatever

[sirfrogsworth]

When I got to this photo in Katrina's collection of vintage family imagery, I was pretty stumped as to how to approach it.

There is a major problem when you zoom in to 100%.

The paper it was developed on has little micro bumps. When it was scanned, the light from the scanner caused a highlight on one side of the bump and a shadow on the other. This causes a pattern which is nearly impossible to eliminate using traditional techniques.

The easiest way to fix this is actually quite clever. You scan it once, then turn it upside down and scan it again. The second pass reverses the side the highlight and shadow appear on, so you can combine the images in Photoshop and blend them together, essentially canceling out the bumps. It's weirdly analogous to noise canceling headphones.

But I don't have access to the physical copy of this image.

So... now what?

Enter Fast Fourier Transform or FFT.

This is a filter that uses extra fancy math to recognize patterns in the image and eliminate them. There is a pretty good filter for Photoshop, but it does not work easily with newer Macs with Apple Silicon. I really did not want to figure that out, and I also was too tired to go downstairs to my PC. However, I learned that a Photoshop competitor, Affinity Photo, has this filter built in. So, I downloaded a trial copy and started the process of trying to figure out how to fix this image.

It was amazingly simple. It brings up these star patterns and you just paint black circles over every one but the center. It literally felt like magic. (Full screen with sound recommended)

So once I did this process I ended up with this...

The paper still had a rough texture but it was much easier to work with using traditional techniques. I started with a black and white conversion and meticulously went through the photo zapping scratches and flaws and balancing tones and sharpening facial features. All of my photo restoration tricks were needed.

I eventually landed here...

I then thought maybe I should match the sepia tone of the original print, so I got to here...

I think the black and white looks nicer in this instance, but I always like having options and this is the most faithful representation of how the photo originally looked.

But there is something else I have been playing around with lately. Photoshop has these experimental neural filters that use cloud processing to do various tricky enhancements. Most of them are in beta and they can be very quirky. But they have a colorizer that tries to detect people and things and adds color to them. Not every black and white photo is a good candidate. I have found these professional portrait photos work decently, but the filter is very hit-and-miss. And there are tools within the filter to help you make a miss more of a hit, but often I have to accept the photo isn't going to work.

But I decided to give it a shot with this one and surprisingly, the colorizer got me most of the way there.

I can work with that.

The one thing it does well is skin. Manually painting color onto skin is tricky and requires more skill and knowledge of traditional painting techniques than I have. But if a filter can do that part for me, I can do the rest.

So after my touchups, I got the image to here.

All I have left to do is my standard color enhancements to make them a little less ghostly and a little more human.

And I present to you where I started and the finished product. I encourage you to flip back and forth.

I'm not sure how, but I was able to go from an image I thought was impossible to edit to a beautiful colorized memory for my best friend's mom. I cannot wait to show her.

#long post #photography #photo restoration

[lottiestudying]

13.11.2023—productive morning but still sleeping weirdly. i just cannot make it past 6pm

also a day late but happy 5 years to this account 🥹 been a fun journey 🌸🤍🌿

#studyblr #studyspo #study notes #study motivation #bullet journal #study blog #athenastudying #stationery #studying #study #heybeliada #heysayjump #hey colossus #heycazz #heychemblr #heycoral #deskspo #study space #study spaces #desk set up #desk #roomspo #tumblr room #productivity #college #college dorm #plants #indie #heydija #heysucculent

[tenpintsof-sundrop]

I really really hate to be that person - especially because I know a lot of people are under the impression that fanfic authors are greedy and we should be grateful for any comments we get, even if those comments are full of unauthorized concrit, even if they're kind of rude, even if they're weirdly self-shaming (sometimes insinuating that people should feel bad over reading the dark or smutty content in the fics or that we should feel bad for writing it in the first place even though you're also reading it??).

But like, lately, I have been getting so many comments along the lines of "this fic should be longer!!" "I wish this was a series!!" "please turn this into a series!" "I would read endless sequels of this!!!" - today someone literally commented on one of my fics saying that it was a war crime that the fic was 30k instead of being 'a whole series'. And I totally understand the mindset that if something is good, you want more of it. If you enjoy something, you want more of it. But these comments are definitely not as flattering as people think they are.

When reading those comments - it doesn't always come off as a compliment. Most of my fics range from 5k to 30k on average, and they are usually oneshots or oneshots that I have split into multiple parts in order to be more readable - most of my longer, ongoing series are abandoned because I didn't have the steam to maintain them. (Most people don't know at all how hard it is to write a good, coherent, well-plotted 100k fic and actually keep up with it.) After I post the fic I have written later this week, I will have written over 400k this year alone, with my entire AO3 having over one million words split between 79 different fics.

So often, having people look at my fics and having their only comment be to 'write more' - feels like an insult. Because I do write more. I have written more. I write consistently. (It just sucks that people have almost nothing to say about what I have already written.)

Having people look at my fics - usually very long fics - and go "hey, this would be better if it was longer!!" or "hey, that was good, but the only productive thing I have to say about it is: make it longer" - it always feels very discouraging.

It doesn't make me want to rush to write more of that fic. In fact, most of the time, I actively avoid working on sequels to fics where the only comments are 'more please' because I know the only thing people will say about the sequel is 'when are you gonna make more?' - and oftentimes, I don't intend to make more.

I have said this in another post, but the ending to my fics are always intentional. I don't write fics with the mindset of turning them into a 100 part series. I write fics with the mindset of making them like a film or a short TV series - telling a capsule of a story with a very intentional beginning, middle, and end. And if I write a sequel, it's because I feel there is more to be told - but I will also cap off that sequel with a very intentional ending.

(Also, don't get me started on the complex of - if fics don't have the classic 'happy ending' people feel like every single thread needs to be resolved until it gets to a more classic happy ending, when I love writing intentional melancholic and thoughtful endings.)

Also - in general, I feel like people don't understand how much work goes into a fic. It might take you about 2 hours to read a fic that's 30k (and a lot of people who are avid readers probably read faster than that, reading it in an hour or less) - but concepting that fic, writing that fic, and meticulously editing that fic so that it can be readable and pleasant for people takes upwards of 20 hours of work. I would say realistically, upwards of 30 hours. And those are just working hours - hours sitting at the computer actively working. That doesn't include the time spent in between workshopping the ideas in my head while I am doing other mundane tasks in life.

It's very, very easy to consume a 30k oneshot in one sitting and then hold out your plate and go "more please!!" without putting any thought into how much work went into the original fic.

All of this just to say - please think about these things next time you are commenting on a fic (or even closing a fic without commenting at all), or doing something stupid like generating a fic with AI - which steals from everyday hard working fanfic writers. Fanfiction is hard work - it's a labour of love, and it shouldn't be about blind consumerism where you finish one and then rapidly start looking for the next one. You should appreciate each one like a good, hand pulled taffy instead of gobbling them all down like cheap candy mass made by factory machines.

Yeah - I think that's it.

-your local over worked (but still passionate) fanfic writer

#uuugh #either nobody will see this or everyone will and they will complain about it #sundrop speaks #dick grayson x reader #jason todd x reader #ellie williams x reader #spencer reid x reader #abby anderson x reader #mike schmidt x reader #fanfiction #fandom #vanessa shelly x reader #gar logan x reader

[oracle-of-dream]

Your Admirer

Minors DNI

Summary: Recently, you've been receiving gifts left at the door of your apartment. From a secret admirer. You're too busy trying to guess who's gotten a small crush to notice how mad he is for you, and there's no telling how far he'll go to get to you.

Warnings: Stalking, Manipulation, Use of Aphrodisiacs, Unprotected Sex, Stomach Bulge, Breeding, Mention of Pregnancy, Daddy Kink, Size Kink

Wordcount: 4.4k

You woke up with the sunlight peeking from behind your curtain as the wind coming in from the window blew them open. Slowly, you managed to find the strength to roll out of bed and shut the window. You don’t remember opening the window, but it was weirdly hot while you slept so you figured that you must’ve gotten up in the middle of the night to open it. You swiped your phone off the charger and walked into your bathroom to brush your teeth and wash your face off. After wiping your face, you checked the time. The clock said 9:30 am. It was another workday, so you needed to get moving before you were late. You only worked every other day, so you were able to spend most days at home. But Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays you had to come into the office to check in with your boss for the projects for the week to get finished on time. You put on your outfit for the day. Another perk of the job was the lack of strict work uniforms. You put on dark denim jeans, a sleeveless white shirt, with moon earrings, and a YXL chain to go around your waist. You couldn’t afford YXL products on your salary, but it was just another gift you’d gotten from someone who’s been leaving you gifts at work. 

    The gifts would get delivered a bunch of different ways, so you were never able to find out who was the one sending them. First, it was flowers delivered to the office, then your favorite snacks and the most recent was the YXL chain. Each gift came with a handwritten letter, which you kept. You thought it was sweet that someone was so interested in you to try and get your attention in some way, but you wanted to find out who it was. None of your coworkers were your type, but it had to be someone there who knew which floor you worked on, right?

    Your alarm to head out went off, snapping you out of your thoughts. 

    You rushed out the door of your apartment to catch the bus to take you further downtown. The bus was always a little early, so you managed to get the timing to arrive just when it did so you could get the perfect seat. You set your bag down in the seat next to you, waiting for your friend to get there. But he always was one of the last people to get on the bus, so you scrolled through TikTok while waiting for him.

“Hey Y/n, good morning!”

 You heard his voice, which made you look up from your phone. “Soobin! Good morning!” 

You met Soobin a little after you moved into this part of town a few months ago. He was nice to you, so the two of you got pretty close easily. Soobin was wearing a black and white flannel, a black undershirt, blue jeans, and black glasses. His hair was messy like he was rushing to get to the bus.

“Running to catch the bus again?” 

“Yeah, I woke up late again,” Soobin laughed. He sat down next to you, holding your bag for you as he messed with his hair. That’s when he clocked your new chain belt. “Whoa! I didn’t know you had money like YXL, why don’t you take a limo to work?”

You punched his arm playfully as he teased you. “I didn’t buy it! It was him again.”

Soobin rubbed his arm where you punched him. “So you don’t know who this guy is?”

You shook your head.

“Are you sure it’s someone from your job?”

“Well, of course. Only my coworkers know which floor of my job I work in. You need a keycard to get up to the 5th floor where our offices are. None of the other businesses use our floor, the only other people I could think of are like… janitors.”

Soobin chuckled. “Hey, maybe he IS a janitor! Don’t break his heart.”

“Well, if a janitor can afford YXL gifts for his crush. Then I think I at least owe him dinner.”

“Dinner?” Soobin’s eyes widened. “I didn’t think you’d be okay dating a janitor.”

“A rich janitor!? Why not? I don’t mind being a house-husband. I’ll cook and clean at home like the perfect spouse.”

Soobin laughed even harder. “I think you’d be pretty sure in a little maid costume, waiting for your husband to come home.”

The two of you cracked a few more jokes before the stop where you needed to get off arrived. The both of you stepped off the bus and parted ways. Soobin worked at a cafe a few blocks down from your office building, but he always insisted on walking with you before walking in the opposite direction to his job.

“Okay, Soobie, I’ll see you around lunch.” You waved as you walked into the building.

Soobin waved back, waiting until you were in the building before heading back the way he came.

Work was just a bunch of boring service meetings, going over goals for the next few weeks. But you couldn’t focus as you kept staring at the clock. It was always a little before your lunch break at 12:30 pm that someone would come by and drop off the gifts from your admirer. You nearly fell out of your chair when you saw the parcel delivery man walking into the 5th floor. 

You stopped him as he got to the door of your offices.

“Hi there! Anything for me today?” You asked politely.

The man looked through the boxes he had, “No, sorry. I don’t see anything.”

Your shoulders dropped at the thought that you didn’t get another gift. Maybe you’re admirer found someone else they’re interested in… But at least you could go on lunch break.

You thanked the delivery man and went back to your desk to collect your things before leaving. You looked in your desk drawer at the letters you’d received from him. You looked at each, comparing them. The color of the card was your favorite color and it smelled sweet like roses. On a whim, you took them with you as you left your office. You left the building and walked a few blocks to get to Soobin’s cafe. 

Soobin winked at you as you walked in. “Hi, Welcome in!”

You smiled at him as you found an empty table. You set your things down and looked at the cards again. The handwriting all looked the same, even like it was written with the same pen. 

Soobin came over to you with a plate a sandwich and a warm cup of tea. “The usual for ya.”

“You know me so well…” You put the card down and took a bite of your sandwich.

“Well. You get the same thing every time you come here.” Soobin stuck his tongue out at you.

You didn’t notice as you were reading the card again. “Of course, I do because you’re the one who recommended it to me. And it turned out so good!”

“What’s this?”

“One of the cards he left me. The one that came with the flowers.”

The cards were nearly written, clean, and smelled good. Sometimes at work, you catch yourself wanting to just smell the card again. You didn’t know the scent, but it was something that made your body warm and fuzzy.

Dear Y/n,

The sweet flower that I’ve watched from afar. I hope this comes to you as warmly as you did into my life. I fell for you the moment I saw you and when you speak, I can only hear a symphony of your voice. My thoughts about you are truly impure, but as a man of honor and respect, I hope that earn your affection in your heart, mind, and body with my gift. And expect more from me.

Your new admirer.

Soobin read it. “I didn’t know that you were into this kind of stuff.”

You shrugged. “I don’t know if I am, but I know that I don’t hate it. It’s really sweet! But I also want to be able to see the person and know about them, instead of them just knowing about me.”

“You want them to show themself?”

You nodded. “Of course! How am I supposed to know if I like them back?”

“What if it's someone you’re not expecting? You said it’s a coworker, so what if it’s someone you’re close with as friends?” Soobin’s voice was soft and deep, with his face spelling concern.

You pat him on the shoulder. “Why do you look so worried? I’m sure it’ll be fine. I’m open to meeting people, even if it's someone I know. Because it seems like we’ve spoken to each other at least once according to this. I just want to give him an honest chance. And…”

“And?”

You shift nervously in your seat. “I’m kinda interested in this whole, impure thoughts thing. It’s kinda hot…”

Your last sentence hung in the air between the two of you. It somehow felt like the whole room got a little quieter.

You struggled to find your words. “That was a little…” 

“Out of pocket? Yeah. But, it's cool, I’m glad you’re into this guy. He’s lucky. So tell me how it goes if you get the chance to meet him.”

You nodded. “Yeah totally! I’d call you asap.”

“I don’t have your number…”

You cocked your head to the side. “How did that happen?” You reached into your bag, but couldn’t find your phone. “I think I left my phone at work, let me borrow yours, and I’ll give you my number.”

“I can’t, it’s not one me.” Soobin pulled out a napkin and pen from his apron and scribbled his number neatly on the napkin. “Here’s my number, you can text me when you get back to the office.”

You took the napkin and carefully tucked it away in your bag.

You finished your food as Soobin went back to work, he occasionally would stop near you to chat for a bit before going back to his job. After finishing, you left a tip in the jar since Soobin never let you pay for your meals. Then you headed back to the office.

You finished the rest of your workday and while packing your bag to head home you remembered Soobin’s number. You put the napkin on your desk while you looked for your phone, which somehow ended up in the drawer where you kept the other cards. You put the cards on your desk and added Soobin’s number to your phone. Naming him Soobie on your phone, you shoot him a text to give him your number.

“Yo, Soobie, I got the number. I’ll be over to pick you up real soon.”

You packed everything else on your desk and tossed it in your bag to hurry out the door to get the Soobin’s cafe before the bus started to get there. 

You walked into the cafe to see a different barista working. He smiled at you as you walked up to his counter.

“What can I get for you?”

“Oh, I’m not here for food–I’m looking for Soobin.”

The barista nodded in understanding. “He said he had to be somewhere, so he left early today. A little after 1ish.”

You pulled out your phone to text him, “Hey, is everything alright? You’re not at work, so I’m just going to head home. Let me know if you need anything.”

You thanked the barista and walked about out the door, heading to the bus stop. It felt strange to go home alone again, like how it had been when you had first moved into town. Like you were alone but somehow someone was always looking at you. Even when you couldn’t see anyone looking, you could just feel the eyes watching you… But when Soobin started going with you, the feeling would be gone. His presence was nice to have around and protected you from whoever was out there…

You ride the bus back home, alone and in silence. The feeling makes your skin itch a little. You tried to distract yourself from the feeling by reading the letters again. Your head was foggy, your hands were damp, your body felt warm, and you realized your heart was racing. You somehow popped an awkward boner that you had to use your bag to hide. You got off at your stop, the bag still covering your bulge as you walked quickly to your apartment building. 

When you got to the door, there was a small bag at your doorstep. You looked around before picking it up. It smelled like roses and candy. It was a gift from him? But how did he know where you lived?

You looked around with a little bit of panic as you put in your door pin code and unlocked the door. You slipped inside quickly and locked the door behind you. You were home but didn't feel safe. Your mind was racing at the thought of someone following you home, the worst possible scenarios playing in your head. The sound of you getting a text broke your train of thought.

It was a text from Soobin! 

Soobie: Hey, sorry y/n! I had to take care of some stuff, did you get home alright?

y/n: Soobin!! This is crazy, and I’m freaking out! The admirer guy left a gift outside of my apartment!

Soobie: That’s crazy! Did you see anyone near your house?

y/n: No, I didn’t see anyone. But I think I’m gonna lose it. And my head isn’t right.

Soobie: Is there something I can do?

Soobie: Do you need someone?

y/n: I think I do… Can you come over?

Soobie: Yeah, of course. I’ll bring some medicine for your head too.”

y/n: Thanks Bin, I’ll send you address.

After a few minutes, there was a knock at the door. You looked at the peephole to make sure it was him before letting Soobin in the door. You hugged him as soon as the door was locked behind him.

“Jeez, y/n. I didn’t think you’d get spooked so easily.” Soobin hugged you gently.

“It’s just weird!”

“Did this gift come with a letter?” 

You nodded.

“You haven’t read it?”

You shook your head. “I’ve been too scared.”

Soobin patted your head. “That’s okay, let’s give you that medicine I brought.” Soobin gave you two blue pills and walked into the kitchen. He pulled a glass from the cabinet and filled it with water from your filter in the fridge.

You sat on the couch while he was in the kitchen, filling your glass of water. The letters were scattered on the coffee table in front of you with the unopened one waiting patiently for you. 

“Soobin.”

“Yea?”

“I think I wanna open it since you’re here now.”

“Let’s give you this medicine first…”

You waited for Soobin to come back with water and he brought a coaster with him for the water to sit on the coffee table. You swallowed the pills and a big gulp of water. 

“How much for pills?”

“Don’t worry about it, I was going to buy them anyway.”

You nodded. “O-Oh okay.” 

Soobin sat next to you on the couch, letting his body lean into yours. “You sure you wanna open it now? Or do you wanna wait?”

“I’m gonna do it now.” You snatched the bag off the table and looked inside the gift bag. It was a pack of King-size condoms!? And a letter. You tossed the condoms away and read the letter.

Dear y/n,

I know I’ve probably given you quite the scare with this gift, but I want you to know how much you mean to me and I wanted to know how you feel about me. I know I can never enter your home by forcing my way in, as I’d never forgive myself either. I knew that I’d only be okay being intimate with you, in your home, if you invited me over. I hope you understand me…

Your Admirer.

You could hear your heart in your ears. “Soobin…”

“Yeah?”

“You’ll be honest with me, yeah?”

“Always.”

“How did you know where I kept my coasters in my house?”

Soobin didn’t answer…

“Soobin!”

“I…” Soobin started but couldn’t find the right words. “Please understand me–” Soobin moved toward you, but you flinched away from him.

“Are you my admirer!?”

“I am,” Soobin said without blinking. His eyes were full and his expression was one you couldn’t understand. “Please try to get why I did all this. You said you’d give me a chance anyway, so please let me have this.”

“How long have you been following me?”

“Please don’t–”

“Answer me!”

Soobin sighed. “About two months. I’ve been in love with you since I first saw you but I couldn’t find a good way to tell you. But when you started taking the bus, we ended up talking and getting close. I tried to give you hints. I wanted things to be different…” Soobin leaned in to kiss you, his hand slipping to the back of your neck to keep you from running. 

As your lips met, you could smell Soobin. Roses and sweet candy, just like the cards. You pushed away from him, but his grip on your next was like metal with his other hand snaking around your waist. He finally let you go so he could breathe.

Your body was warm, and you were so hard it was impossible to hide it. 

“The medicine’s working now too. It’s faster than I thought…” Soobin muttered.

You felt like you’d been slapped. “Did you drug me?”

“Yeah, I did, baby. But it was just to get you in the mood, I’ll take care of everything else. I’ll take care of you, baby.” Soobin pulled you in for another kiss, catching your mouth open just a crack to force his tongue into your mouth. 

You tried to fight the feeling, but your brain was starting to numb out and you felt yourself giving into the kiss, pulling Soobin into you as you laid back on the couch. Your hand moved to his cheek, continuing the make-out session. You were in charge, exploring the dark-haired boy’s mouth as the kiss started getting wetter. You broke the kiss, the two of your foreheads rutting against each other. 

“This isn’t right, you tricked me.”

“Only cuz I love you. Please, just let go. Let me do the rest…” Soobin moved his hips, rutting into your crotch to show you he was as hard as you were. Soobin moved to your jaw, kissing down your neck as his hands started to slip your shirt off. 

You started sobbing as Soobin started to explore your torso.

“Shh baby, there’s no reason to cry. I know you love me, just as much as I love you. I can feel it right here,” Soobin said as he started to suck one of your nipples. You squirmed and shook at how good it felt. “See? You like this!”

“Soobin.” 

“Yes, love?”

“It’s my first time…”

Soobin stopped in his tracks. “Really? You’re a virgin?”

You nodded slowly, tears running down your face. “I do like you, but this isn’t how I wanted things. This isn’t right.”

Soobin moved back up to your face, cupping it with both his hands. “I’m so sorry baby. I wasn’t considerate, was I?” Soobin kissed the tears on your face, tasting their saltiness. “I’m sorry, baby. I really am, can you forgive me? Daddy’s really sorry.”

You cried more, your body shaking like a leaf in his hands.

“Daddy promises he’ll take care of you. Forever, and whatever you want, you can have. Just promise to be my baby. I promise I’ll never do something like this again…”

You covered your face, wiping your face. 

“No, no, let me see you. Please, baby. Let me look in your eyes to show you how much I mean it.”

Soobin lifts you up, sitting you on his lap and holding you close to him. His large hands take yours and he looks deep into your eyes. “I’m sorry Daddy used tricks to get you, baby. If you forgive me, I’ll make you feel so good. I’ll buy you anything. And I’ll make sure I take care of you, always. Doesn’t that sound nice?”

You didn’t know if it was the pills or Soobin’s look, but your heart melted at his eyes looking into yours. Your crying slowed to hiccuping and sobbing.

“There you are.” Soobin hugged you tighter. “I’ll do it right this time. Do you want to continue, baby?”

You couldn’t fight it. The way “baby” rolled off his lips did something to you. You gave in and nodded slowly. “Please, keep going…”

Soobin’s smile was bright and kind. He stripped off his shirt, and pulled you more onto his pelvis, letting you feel his cock under you. “You’re body is doing this to me. Do you feel it?” Soobin slowly shifted his hips up into you, making sure to poke you with his dick.

You nodded.

“Daddy’s gonna put that in you.”

You shivered at his words.

“Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you…” Soobin laid you on your stomach and slid your pants off you. 

You heard a box opening and some clothes shuffling. You get impatient and turn over onto your back to see Soobin naked, you looked down to see his intimidating cock. The tip was swollen and red, begging to enter you while precum was leaking down the veins of it. Soobin was holding the box of condoms with one of them in his mouth.

“Am I making you wait too long, baby?” He looked down. “Don’t be scared, I’ll be easy with you.” Soobin brought out lube from his bag and coats his cock. “I’m guessing you’re not prepared, but I think I can handle that easily.” Soobin started coating two of his long fingers.

You took the bottle from him. “I can do it myself.” You sat up, but Soobin held you down.

“Nope. I’m taking care of you, so no extra work from you.” He smiled evilly before kissing you again. While distracted he slipped his fingers in together.

Your eyes rolled in your skull. “Holy–” 

“See? Isn’t it better when I do it?” Soobin swirled and stretched you with speed and ease, making you squirm under him while he held you down. But Soobin smiled more when you suddenly screamed in pleasure, telling him he found what he was looking for. “Say it.” 

You looked at him with confusion. “Say what.”

“Call me, Daddy, baby. I just wanna hear you say it.” Soobin hit the spot again.

“Oh, god. Please, again.”

“Again, what?” Soobin started thrusting his fingers but avoided hitting your spot again.

“Please Daddy, I–” As soon as the word left your lips, Soobin took his fingers out and put his tip at your hole.

“Oh, I’ll hit it again and again. So hold on.”

You wrap your arms around his neck and brace for him, trying to stay as loose as possible for him. And even with Soobin’s masterful prep, he was still stretching your walls. Soobin’s scent filled your lungs as he started to push into you, holding your body to his. The sweat made your bodies stick together. Your face streamed more tears and your eyes started to get hazy as Soobin kissed you through the pain.

“I know you can do it. Come one, for Daddy.” Soobin whispered in your ears as he kept pushing deeper. 

Soobin hit your spot and you came on the spot. “Please s-stop! Please! Don’t move anymore…”

Soobin froze, trying his best. His groans of restraint as his cock is almost in you completely. “You’re so tight–and somehow still squeezing more…” Soobin was looking into your eyes, waiting for you to let him move again. He could’ve cum from the sensation right there, but he wanted it all. He needed it. He tried to move a little deeper, but you hissed in complaint.

“Please! Don’t do anything, I need to… calm down.” You almost mewled as you were drooling from the sensations. 

Soobin was biting his lip, trying to keep himself in control, but seeing you like this was difficult. Surely you could take him, all the way? Even though it was your first time… He was sure he could make it fit.

You were taking deep breaths, slow ones. But suddenly flinched when Soobin flexed his dick. “Just… do it.”

“What was that?” Soobin, struggling to hold back, said playfully.

“You can fuck me, just do it…” You had your eyes shut, trying to focus again.

“You gotta say it right.”

You peeled one eye open to look at him. You could tell he was trying to hold it together too. So you pushed yourself deeper using the couch for leverage. You were slow… you needed him to do it. You couldn’t even make it an extra inch before you couldn’t go any further…

“Daddy… please fuck me…” You said in defeat.

Soobin’s brain snapped at “Daddy”, as he lifted one of your legs. “Try not to wake the neighbors,” Soobin said before pushing in the rest of his length. 

Your head flew back with your eyes wide open. You had used toys before, but nothing touched so deeply as Soobin did. You looked at your stomach and saw a slight bulge in your stomach. You watched as the bulge moved and pulsed as Soobin started slowly moving, fucking slow but deep. It was enough to make you scream like a lunatic. 

By the end of it, you knew you had come at least two more times before you heard Soobin whisper. “Oh, it’s cumming.”

You could feel Soobin’s hot cum shooting into you. Soobin broke the condom and was pouring cum directly into you. Pump after pump.

“Oh please, get pregnant for me. Be my housewife forever. Our little babies will be so cute.” Soobin moved as he fucked you through his orgasm.

If you could, you definitely would’ve been pregnant…

You don’t remember much after Soobin finished. You passed out from exhaustion shortly after. But you woke up the next morning in bed with new pajamas and Soobin sleeping next to you.

#oracle of dreams #soobin x male reader #soobin x reader #soobin smut #choi soobin #txt x reader #txt fanfic #txt smut #kpop x male reader #kpop x male reader smut

[aihoshiino]

chapter 133 thoughts!

Right off the bat, I'm really glad to see OnK looping back around to address something that was largely left hanging from the first half of the movie arc - the idea that Ruby simply lacks the acting chops to properly portray Ai in the movie. This was hammered in to such a degree that I actually had a theory back before shooting started that Ruby was going to end up backing out of playing Ai and that Kana, Akane or even Frill would end up taking her place. Obviously it's not that I want Ruby to fail here or that she doesn't deserve a big W after everything she's been through but it felt really weird for the story to correctly make the point that Ruby's acting was going to make or break this movie and then not properly bring that point home. So I'm glad to see we're actually digging into it this chapter.

That said, it does feel a little... abrupt, I guess? Or rather, I totally understand Ruby cracking under the pressure and having a bit of a meltdown off the back of Nino's words last chapter - that obviously cut really deep - but suddenly jumping back to this idea that Ruby is Just Not Getting Ai after we hadn't touched on that since filming started and we've had no indication it's still an ongoing issue is weird. Especially since Mengo has literally just been flat out drawing Ai any time she's portraying her on panel lol. Maybe holding off on showing her with the double hoshigan would've been a better choice in conveying that...

Again, I guess it just comes back to what I've been saying lately about the movie arc feeling really weirdly structured. Things feel kind of jumbled, or necessarily out of order persay but the way arcs, emotional beats and development is happening in fits and spurts gives everything this stuttering rhythm where all the major beats feel like they're landing in really strange places.

All that aside... man, poor Ruby. We haven't really gotten as good a look into her head as I would've liked during the movie's production but the amount of pressure she feels must be immense. Strawberry Productions have put all their money into this movie and Ruby is telling the story of one of the people she loves more than anyone else in the world. It's no wonder she's in tears by the end of it.

The story also addresses something I'm really glad to see on the page - Kana acknowledging that Ai was the way she was largely because of her negative experiences. I've had a bit of unease lately with the idea of OnK portraying Ai as an aspirational figure or that Ruby 'becoming' or 'surpassing' Ai is a positive step for her. Ai of B-Komachi existed because Hoshino Ai experienced such an abnormally cruel life that was so utterly lacking in warmth or love that she had to make up a perfect version of herself just to feel like she had permission to be alive. It's not that Ruby has never experienced hardship - god knows she has - but she simply does not have experience with the exact nature of the despair, the loneliness and the self hate that Ai struggled with her entire life. Without opening herself up to that, she might never be able to fully understand Ai.

Kana's description of Nino is also really fascinating and it lines up with how I personally was reading her off the back of that chapter combined with the foundation laid by 45510. Her feelings for Ai are a life-altering obsession that has ripped down the boundary between 'love' and 'hate'. It's both at the same time which is an emotional state you can probably conclude is not going to lead someone to grieve in a healthy or productive way.

<3 nino is such a gay little freak i love her so much

Ruby and Kana's talk in general in this chapter is sooooo fucking good, dudes. It's hard not to want to go over it line by line lol but it's the kind of talk I've wanted them to have for a really long time. Their earnest concern for each other and their attempts to reach out and protect the other as clumsily as they end up doing it are so sweet and it makes the end of this chapter such a gut punch... but we'll get there.

I will say it's uh incredibly fucking bizarre to see Akane sorted in alongside the people Ruby considers her family??? Like, I get that Ruby had the whole 'can I call you oneechan' thing with her back while she and Aqua were dating but they've never been portrayed as being that close or really on friendly terms at all after the Private arc. Not only that, but this is specifically in a context where Ruby is talking about how the movie is going to help her family, who are still stuck in their grief over Ai's death move forward - so why the fuck is Akane there?? Akane has no personal relationship to Ai! She was not remotely affected by her death! I can only assume this was some kind of art mistake because I otherwise have absolutely no fucking clue what this is supposed to mean. EDIT: Taking a closer look at the art, I'm pretty certain this is in fact an art mistake and that's Ruby accidentally given Akane's hair screening: her eyes are dark and she seems to have Ruby's hoshigan. Mystery solved!

Ruby's face as she cries looks sooooooo much like Miyako's expression as she cried back in 125. I even noticed then how much she looked like both Ai and Ruby in that moment and it was so sad and lovely to see that similarity mirrored in Ruby. Miyako is their mom!!! Ai and Ruby are her daughters!!!

And finally... Kana just lets it all out.

Honestly, seeing Kana finally express all this stuff was so cathartic. She didn't want to be in B-Komachi to start with, she was bullied into being the center and then watched Ruby absolutely leave her in the dirt. Knowing what we do about Kana's own history of abandonment and her absolute terror at the prospect of being left behind and made irrelevant, it would be naive to assume she didn't feel some jealousy or bitterness in the wake of Ruby's meteoric rise to fame. She's only human, after all and I can't help but wonder if this is one of the 'cracks' left in black hoshigan Ruby's wake that Aqua ominously alluded to a while back.

Even as she pours out all this bile, though - Kana is still, in a twisted way, doing this out of pure love for Ruby. As she herself puts it, she is at risk of permanently destroying their relationship here even though Ruby is her closest and dearest friend. But that's why she feels she had to do it. Like always, Kana sacrifices herself, desecrates herself and throws herself under the bus to support the people she loves and to play the coordinator - to ensure her costars can give the best possible performance. Arima Kana? Don't worry about her. She's fine off in the shadows by herself, right?

I also can't help but wonder if Kana is doing this at least in part for herself, too. We saw that she, too, was struck deeply and unsettled by Nino's words last week and by how deeply Nino was poisoned by her hate and feelings of inferiority towards Ai. Maybe this is Kana's way of trying to purge herself of those feelings so she can look her inner Nino in the eye and confidently say "I am not like you".

No break next week...!

#oshi no ko #onk spoilers #oshi no posting

[bullshits-smut]

Been watching welcome to the ballroom lately and it's really made me think about how... Kinda shit anime criticism is in general?

This show got dunked on pretty hard for its animation aesthetic of having the characters weirdly distort and contort themselves during dance sequences to look like something Peter Chung would draw rather then typical anime characters.

And like, they do. They look fuckin weird dancing. And it rules.

Like people acted like this was some fuck up of production when it came out or just like bad decisions instead of a really dope way to portray dancing? Cause like, I love dancing. I cry at good dancing, but dancing is fucking weird. And like competitive dancing especially. People look fuckin weird when they're doing it.

And animation at its core should exaggerate on that. And in welcome to the ballroom they do. People become distorted to the point they can stop reading as people and start reading as shapes. They embody the dance more then a person ever can. They become these beautiful swirling blurs of shape and colour rather then two people dancing and it's amazing. The dance becomes rather then an act of two people it's like an abstract force that exists in its own right.

I fucking adore this show.

And it's absolutely gorgeous.

#welcome to the ballroom #ballroom e youkoso #animation #sakuga

[popculturebuffet]

So Let's Talk About Warner Bros Discovery Burning Down HBO Max for the Insurance Money

Okay real quick for those of you who don't know who I am: I"m Jake, I review animation on this fair blog sometimes on comission (which is open by the way) , and mostly just because I want to. I love all kinds of stuff from comics, to comic strips, to movies, and review all kinds in turns. I"m telling you this so you have full and proper context as to why Warner Bros Discovery's latests actions have been HELL on my anxiety. While this week has been a hard one for reasons that aren't your buisness, Warner just made it so much worse so rather than do three reviews this week, i'm doing two and this piece, outlying why I"m so nettled, why I no longer feel any security for anything warner has going , in production or otherwise, and why WBD sucks dirty ass in thunderstorms.

Let's begin with what's going on for those in the back who haven't heard: Last week Warner Bros Discovery made the earthshatteringly dumb decision to cancel their 40 million dollar Batgirl film, and not release it in any way shape or form as a tax write off as well as announcing they were canceling several other dc projects with the Arrowverse finally being taken out back and shot with the Flash getting canceled and given a smal lseason to wrap up (and Superman and Lois likewise detatching from said universe for it's own saftey), and just about every DC Project now in fear of being cut, paticuarlly the tv shows. The Flash MOVIE is weirdly exempt from this despite starring known human dumpster fire whose progressively spiraling Erza Miller. Granted they ARE getting help, so it might help, but it still feels odd to not drop THAT movie but drop one by people who have done absoltuely nothing wrong and is almost finished. And by odd I mean...

So yeah a 40 billion dollar diverse, great looking film is in limbo, any dc film that hasn't started shooting is in the firing range. While I do feel the DCEU badly needed an actual structure instead of just doing whatever movie without any real plan. But

Is somehow worse than no strategy. But there does seem to be SOME method to the madness here.. unfortunatley said method, as most perfectly put by my surrogate tv dad John Oliver "It seems like your trying to burn down my platform for the insurance money"

That does seem to be WBD's plan: Liquidate as much as possible, put as much of it as a tax writeoff as you can, and to hell with what comes next. There's no building going on here, just madly selling anything they can to make money. Which admitely I have done, I once had to sell off my entire 3ds collectoin to get buy, but i'm a 30 year old man with the body of an orangutan, not a BILLION dollar company that should know better. Even if Discovery is new at running this type of company, they seem more concerned with making as much money as possible and don't care if they actually surivive as a platform, if works of art surivive, or for anything other than getting a huge kickback.

And that brings me to today, the worst news in recent animation history. And keep in mind that history includes: 1. Disney cancelling the critically aclaimed and briliant owl house because it was too gay and trying to pretend that's not why they did it 2. Netflix's Childrens Content slowly collapsing into the sea with one or two exceptions. 3. Sex Monster John Lassiter somehow getting another job and a new movie AppleTV+ feels comfortable promoting. 4. The passing of Betty White, Ed Asner and Gilbert Gottfried

But yes HBO Max decided to delist a TON of his content. While ti hasn't happened yet and the backlash, and a recent blow to their stock due to this bullshit as a rare instance of corprate greed biting them, MIGHT stop it, it might be too late. The shows being chopped include Close Enough, a show they had just canceled a week ago and now decided no one can enjoy and that was not only one fo the platforms lead shows, but it's only adult animated comedy that didn't make people throw things at it on sight, Infinity Train, a show people were already mad was screwed out of more than four seasons, Ok KO Let's Be HEroes, one of the best cartoons of the 2010s, Mao Mao Heroes of Pure Heart which was stuck in cancelation limbo, and victor and Valentino, which I have not watched but is JUST going through season 3 as we speak. None of it makes sense, none of it is right and all of it is clearly a ploy to mak ea tax writeoff. And while previous managment had done this, there was a simliar incident iwth greats such as megas xlr and sym boinoic titan, never before has a company made material not only unavablaibe but so nakedly tried to claim something as a loss. I'm HOPING this bs dosen't fly in court, as none of these shows really are the net loss they thinkt hey are, paticuarlly close enough and infinity train, so none of this should add up, but i'm not holding my breath.

I'm also not holding my rage. I belivie in works being avaliable to people. Good or bad, as long as their not harmful , they should be out there and avaliable. Things should be preserved. And making it so several shows are just outright unwatchable, JUST so you can make money is one of the most greedy, discpiable, hateful and agonizing acts i've seen in some time. OK KO thankfully escapes thanks to being on hulu, but that may not be forever and they may try this shit with other platforms. For once most of these shows being on netflix in other countries is a lifesaver. And yes you can still find the stuff that's being taken on the internet, piracy can be bad but it can also be a way to preserve stuff, but I should be able to have a legal and fine means of watching Close Enough. I shoudln't hav eto scour for a show just because you want money. I'm still subscribed to hbo max as it's not me who does and it still has enough content.. but if they keep doing this scorched earth nonsense, it's going to leave them with nothing to sell and nothing to buy and no one to buy into thei rshit. and i'm hoping they learn their lesson and ease back before it's too late and one of the best platforms in the streaming wars is gone.

For now though all I can do is wait and hope like hell more things I care about don't die a cruel greedy death.

#warner bros discovery #hbo max #close enough #infinity train #i'm pissed now

[glassprism]

Maybe a weirdly specific question, but has there ever been a Phantom who has apologized to Christine? For example: instead of repeating “I love you.” At the end of the Final Lair, he says “I’m sorry.”

Yep! Scott Davies, a former standby Phantom in the West End for quite a while (from late 2009 all the way to when the production shut down in 2020), started saying "I'm sorry" to Christine around 2015 or so. I talk about it and give a link in this ask!

#GP gets asks #anonymous #Scott Davies as the Phantom was amazing

[renaiswriting]

Shadows of Desire (part 10)

Pairing: Yoon Jeonghan/Reader

Summary:

You always thought the only romance you would experiment with in your life was the one between pages under the flames at midnight. That was until you found him, because the feel of his fangs digging into your neck was more than addictive.

Word count: +5.4k words

Warnings: Mentions of death, mentions of blood.

If you want to be tagged, please fill out the tag list form.

Author's note: shout-out to my Shadows of Desire playlist because it really helped me find inspiration to write this part lol

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"Are we running out of garlic again— Hey! Wow, why are you so jumpy?"

 

You looked in and shook at Luke as he lifted the mess you had made without missing the swearing coming from his mouth.

 

You apologized, but your shoulders were still tense.

 

"I don't know," you replied, noticing that Luke was still expecting an answer. "I just had a bad dream, I guess."

 

The memories and the well-lived sensations came back to your mind once again, and the ghost of a person you thought you knew made an appearance in your mind.

 

"You've been locked in your room way too much lately," Luke clicked his tongue, and I don't think it's doing you any favors. Maybe you should go outside for a while. Why don't you go and pick some blueberries? Mark told me there are barely any left. God knows when we will have some jam if we don't use it now."

 

"I don't know..." Luke frowned, sitting down on your bed and looking at your current state.

 

"Why not? It was never an issue before. Want me to go with you?"

 

"You hate going there." You shook your head. "I'll think about it, alright?" You offered, but your poor attempt to fool Luke was in vain.

 

"I'll go and get Mark if you want to go with someone; maybe that friend of yours could tag alone as well?"

You froze on your spot.

 

Your heartbeat quickly started picking up, and your hands suddenly felt way too cold.

 

"No."

 

Luke looked at you weirdly.

 

"I don't want to see him."

 

"What happened?" Luke asked. "Did he do something?"

 

You stared at Luke.

 

What could you answer to that question?

 

You were still pretty confused yourself.

 

Technically, it was a bad dream.

 

Like the one you had years ago where you stole Susan's sheep and made a meal with them.

 

It wasn't real.

 

But the feeling was so real that it did make you feel like you were the most horrible monster ever.

 

And even though you could still tell it was a dream, you weren't so sure this time.

 

It had felt so real.

 

You could remember every single thing that had happened in front of your eyes.

 

Every single thing

 

And that made your head feel dizzy.

 

The lines that differentiated between what was real and what was a product of your mind were blurry.

 

"No." You finally spoke. "I just think it would be for the best for me to stay away from him. At least just for some time."

 

"Keep him from taking you the wrong way." Luke nodded. "Why don't you go and have tea with Susan? A woman can only be truly understood by another woman."

 

"Yeah, maybe." You nodded, and Luke thankfully took it. That was the best he would get anyway.

"Mark is going tonight." Luke informed me, cleaning his throat, not knowing where to look. You wanted to laugh; he was usually really awkward whenever he tried to comfort you.

 

"I'll bake a pie then." You promised. Your words had the effect you were expecting, taking some of the worry off Luke's face.

 

"If you want to." He shrugged, but there was a pleasing smile on his face. You could tell he was already looking forward to the dessert. "We're running out of fruits, though." He mentioned it on his way out of your room. "You might want to go and buy some before it's too late."

You wanted to slap yourself.

 

Of fucking course you were running out of fruits; you have been eating them every day as if it were your last meal.

 

And not just fruits.

 

You have been doing everything as if it were your last.

You weren't sure if it was because you have always loved fruits and the eating part helped you calm down from all your nervousness and anxiety or if your body was genuinely making you devour everything that was in front of you because there was a thin chance of it being your last.

"Luke I don't want to go alone." You cried, jumping from your bed to rush towards the front door where Luke was standing, putting his biggest jacket over his shoulders.

 

"I'm sorry, but I cannot go with you. I still own them some money; if I go there, they will not let me live." Luke replied, taking his favorite hat from the chair.

 

"Are you going to Mark's?" You asked hopefully.

 

"Yeah, but only to bring back my beer. I bought a lot in the bar last night, and I was so drunk that he fooled me into giving it to him. He's not going to be back until it's dinner time."

"Can't you really not go on your own?" Luke sighed frustratedly, trying to free himself from your hold on his arm.

"I will try." You mumbled, the pout in your face not really doing anything to make Luke change his mind.

 

"It will only take ten minutes." He reassured you, "Are you sure you want to go in your pajamas?"

It was dark.

Not peach-dark.

But dark nonetheless.

The sky was slowly turning from pink to purple, dark blue, and finally black.

And the birds making sudden noises were making your heart beat as if you were in a race.

You hated the way you had the urge to turn your head with every step you took.

 

You saw a girl walking in front of you, and that somewhat made you feel safer.

 

At least you weren't completely alone.

 

You forced yourself to take a deep breath and stop walking.

Breathe, you reminded yourself.

And for the next ten minutes, as you wandered deeper into the darkness of the tall trees that covered what was left of the light, you kicked at a rock you had found on the ground.

Somehow, it helped.

It was not a person.

Or an animal.

But you felt somewhat accompanied.

Less lonely.

Oh, Jiji, you lamented that the poor thing was probably still in a lot of pain from the snakebite she had come up with earlier that morning.

That's what she gets for wandering around at night, you thought, shaking your head.

Luke had made you swear that you would let Jiji sleep outside one night because every morning he woke up with the living room full of the remains of Jiji's needs.

The poor dog had almost no outlet to do any of her business at night.

But you couldn't help it; you were afraid something bad would happen to her.

This time it was a snake bite, but next time it might be a bite from a...

No.

Nothing like that

Stop it.

But obviously, it was easier said than done.

All those memories, all those sensations... Your heart was still aching against your chest, beating so fast whenever you caught yourself wandering around that nightmare.

It was like your lungs suddenly had trouble holding in air because no matter how much you tried to breathe, the air was never enough.

It was difficult to correctly classify all the emotions you experienced when you couldn't help but think about them.

Were those images simply a figment of your mind, a twisted fantasy that your subconscious was trying to prove?

You had never experienced anything similar; all your dreams, no matter how beautiful or terrifying they had been, were always a blur.

When you woke up, you could remember, on a good day, at least a quarter of what you had actually dreamed.

If anyone asked you, there were only a handful of dreams that you could actually remember, and even these had not been as sharp as those of that night.

Jeonghan... You had come to consider him a friend.

 

He had earned a soft spot in your heart.

 

You felt like a stupid young girl.

 

Had it all been a game to him?

 

What was it?

 

All this time, all the shared moments? All the nights you'd asked him to stay with you while you were falling asleep, so vulnerable, you'd left it up to him to do whatever he wanted.

 

You swallowed the saliva that had accumulated in you dryly; the knot in your stomach didn't seem to go away.

 

Your fists clenched, and you kicked the rock as hard as you could in the direction of the nearest tree.

 

Maybe all those times Luke and Mike teased you, telling you that you weren't ready for the real world, they were right.

Walking in the direction where the poor rock that had accompanied you up to that moment had fallen, you let yourself fall beside it.

 

You drew your legs up to your chest, allowing your elbows to jab against your knees.

 

Your hands covered your face as a frustrated sigh escaped through your fingers.

 

You hated it. The way your heart was still beating fast as, with your free hands, you pulled the dagger out of your back that Jeonghan had plunged into you

 

You had trusted him so much.

 

Maybe his friend sensed it.

 

Maybe he hadn't been the true villain you had believed him to be.

The nausea suddenly became more noticeable as the realization formed in your mind.

 

His friends.

 

Fuck.

 

They were probably part of it.

 

Monsters.

 

All of them.

 

The ones who hated you

 

The ones who didn't want Jeonghan to hang out with you

 

Those who didn't even want to see you a kilometer closer to Jeonghan.

Alarm bells began to ring in your brain, and your body was, once again, at the beginning of a crisis.

 

Even with the big gulps of air you were trying to inhale, the feeling that you were suffocating didn't stop.

The palms of your hands made contact with the ground, with different branches, sharp rocks, and wet grass tearing at your skin on contact.

 

Your eyes were wide open like two saucers, and tears were starting to fall down your cheeks without your permission.

 

Were you about to die?

 

You had never had such a near-death experience, but you were sure you were half a foot away from passing to the other side.

 

The memory of that dream popped into your mind, almost as if mockingly asking you, "Are you sure you were never about to die before?"

 

A cold hand landed on the center of your back; his body invaded the ground, glued to yours, while with his other hand he tried to move his face to the ground.

 

You screamed.

 

Or so you thought, because you felt a heartbreaking burning sensation in your throat.

 

Your hands moved quickly from the floor, where they had been supporting your weight, to try to fight whoever was there.

 

But now that your body was still leaning on the ground without your hands to help distribute the weight, you lost your balance, making you shut your eyes, ready for the impact of your face hitting the ground.

Your heart skipped a beat when the words careful hit your ear.

 

Jeonghan was holding you close to his chest.

 

Your hearing was trying to sharpen as much as possible so you could catch a hint of a heartbeat.

 

But all you could hear was your own heart thudding against your ear.

"Shhh." Jeonghan spoke low, his voice entering your ears like a spell. "Breathe," he instructed. "Take five deep breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth. Can you do that? Can you do that for me?"

"You... You came to—you're going to kill me." You replied, your voice almost impossible to understand because of your gasping breath. Your eyes wouldn't stop leaking tears, your eyes were red and puffy, and your nose was running.

"Breathe." Jeonghan replied, trying to bring your altered mind back to his simple instructions. "Copy the way I'm breathing."

His cold hands were holding you as close to him as possible without actually hurting you.

But instead of calming you, his presence was having the opposite effect.

You started kicking and slapping his arms and hands away from you.

The slapping on his hands shocked him enough to let you go, and as soon as you were out of his hold, you moved as far from him as possible without standing up.

 

His eyes were on your face, studying your every move. Both of his hands were raised, facing you, so you could see his movements.

 

"(Y/n). Please breathe; you're going to hyperventilate." He sat down in a much more comfortable position, but that slight change in posture was enough to send you into panic mode once again. "I won't move, alright? Look at me. I'm here. I won't move closer." He stated this, even moving a few centimeters back.

 

"You're going to hurt me; you came here to finish what you attempted to start, god knows when." You shook your head in disbelief. Your words were slowly becoming more understanding as you were starting to accept your fate. "Did you invite them? Are they around?"

 

"Them? Who are you talking about? It's just me. Jeonghan." He replied, looking confused enough. His right hand was where his heart, if he were still a human and alive, should be beating.

"Your friends." You replied. Your eyes were still red, and old tears were still on your cheeks. Your eyes were looking at him, but they were emotionless. All the previous crying had somehow drained you of any other feeling.

 

This was it. You thought. There's no going back now. There's not a single chance to get away with this, not alive at least.

 

I hope I taste awful. The thought came to your mind, and a wave of angriness started to build inside of you. I hope they all get poison from my blood. I hope they remember me for being the worst they have ever tasted.

 

"I'm not with them." Jeonghan replied, looking defeated. His eyes traveled from your face to the ground, and a frown was visibly on his forehead. It felt out of place. His face didn't match those expressions.

"So you came here to have me all to yourself?" you laughed. The lack of grace in your laughter was more than evident.

 

"No." Jeonghan replied, backing away a few steps as if the very question was physically hurting him. As if your words were daggers stabbing him. "I'm not going to hurt you."

 

"But you tried to."

 

"(Y/n)..." Jeonghan stood up, walking five steps closer to you.

 

"You did. Back off. Now. I don't want you near me."

"I'm not here to hurt you; I'm here to protect you. I want to talk with you." Jeonghan replied, his voice sounding like a plea.

 

"And if I say no, then what will happen? Will you play with my mind, with my memories, the way you have been doing all this time?" You replied angrily. "I don't know what games you're playing, but I'm out. I won't take part in it any longer."

"You played with my memories; do you have any idea of how fuck up that is? Do you even know how fucked up it is to wake up not sure of what's real and what's not?" You added. "No, you have no idea." You replied to yourself before Jeonghan even got a chance to reply.

 

"I didn't mean for you to get this scared of me."

 

"Well, it's a little bit too late for that."

"I only ever meant to protect you. I swear. I never tried to hurt you."

"Shut up. I don't want to listen to you. I don't want to see you. Just go and leave me alone. You and all the others that are just like you."

Jeonghan frowned once again. "It just doesn't make sense. I don't understand what could have possibly happened for you to get so—what did you see?"

 

"And now you're going to play dumb?" You were sick of it. I'm sick of the situation and of Jeonghan. You stood up, starting once again on your way to the place where you should already be.

 

You wondered if Luke was already back.

 

Did he realize you were not home yet?

 

"(Y/n)! Wait." Jeonghan ran to walk next to you. "Please, I think there's something wrong."

 

"Besides what you did?" You asked sarcastically.

 

Jeonghan holds you by your wrist, making it impossible for you to escape from his grip.

"Don't touch me." You spoke with a much braver voice than you really felt.

In reality, you wished for nothing else but for Jeonghan to tell you it had been just a bad dream.

A nightmare.

"You were lying down. In the ground. There was blood. Lots of blood. I tried to help you, but you stood up and tried to kill me." Your eyes naturally moved to his half-open mouth, his shinny teeth, and his sharp fangs, which only now were a little bit too sharp for them to be considered... Normal.

His eyebrows drew so close together that they almost seemed to form a unibrow. If there had been any more color in his face at that moment, it would have been gone.

 

The cold night breeze did nothing to stop the shivers and shivering that ran through your body. Your feet and hands were already frozen, and you didn't need to see your reflection to know that both your cheeks and nose were red.

The breeze blowing through the dampness that had left such a cry helped keep you grounded in reality.

 

What Jeonghan had already done, you had no way to change.

 

As much as you wanted to beg and wish it were otherwise, what was done was done.

 

"No, that's not—those are not the memories that I hide from you; that doesn't—listen. That's not what happened that night; it wasn't me that did that. It was someone else." Jeonghan spoke quickly, his words barely making sense as he started a new sentence before finishing the one he started before. You could almost physically feel the way his brain was working overtime in such a short time.

"That night I was hunting near your house. When I heard a scream. Your scream. I don't usually get involved, especially when I know it's another one of ours—another vampire, hunting. But this area is usually my clan's. We try not to hunt humans, so our diet is mostly animal. Sheep, in my preference. So I was alarmed. When I got to where I heard that scream, I saw you with another vampire. A vampire who unfortunately seems to be more involved in your life than you think. The only memories of that night I erased were of myself when I started fighting that vampire."

"Am I supposed to believe you?" you asked incredulously. But the truth was, you didn't know what to believe anymore. "I'm sure about the people in my life. And not one, not one person in that small circle, would be able to hurt me."

"(Y/n), I need you to trust me on this one. Please. I really think you're in danger right now. I don't know what to do—maybe Seungcheol might know; he's the oldest of my clan." Jeonghan started thinking out loud, talking to himself while holding your wrist tightly while he started walking deep into the woods, making you follow him clumsily behind.

Your heels dug into the ground as best you could, trying with all your might to avoid being dragged to wherever Jeonghan was trying to take you.

His hand was gripping your wrist so tightly that his fingers were already beginning to mark your skin.

"I'm not going anywhere with you; let go of me!"

Jeonghan turned, glaring at you. "I regret to inform you that on this occasion you don't have much of a choice. You are in danger."

You began to struggle again to get him to let go, but a wave of peace and tranquility washed over you, making your brain feel funny and a little dizzy.

You didn't quite remember why you had been so upset.

What had happened?

You smiled.

You had no idea.

"Better?" Jeonghan asked you again, this time holding you more gently. You nodded, still a little confused but unable to help the oeaueueueque chuckle that escaped your lips. Jeonghan smiled back, switching hands to hold your wrist with his left hand and your back with his right. "I'm glad. Now we'll go to my place; I need to check that everything is okay before I return you home, okay?"

"Okay."

Slowly that dizzy, tingling feeling in your head began to disappear. It was like you had a cloud in front of your eyes, and with each step, you could see more clearly.

Jeonghan was walking briskly, but he seemed to remember that you needed to move slower, especially with so much darkness.

"Where—?"

"We're almost there." Jeonghan replied gently, but his gaze was on the ground, still too busy with his own thoughts.

You didn't try to fight your way out.

It was in vain.

You couldn't even see the ground; there was no way to escape and run away from there without being discovered.

You walked in silence for about another five minutes. Five minutes that made you think about every single possibility, every possible scenario

Five minutes in which Jeonghan was constantly turning backwards and sideways, sharpening his ears to their maximum capabilities

Five minutes to say goodbye.

Jeonghan had told you he didn't plan to hurt you.

But they were on their way to the house he shared with those who hated you so much.

You closed your eyes, talking to your mother for a few moments.

When your eyes opened again, you found yourself in front of two lanterns and a large black gate, which protected a huge house that looked like something out of those old stories you loved to read.

Both the gate and the house at the back of the road were black. Some lights were on, and you could have sworn you saw two shadows moving behind the white curtains of one of the second-floor windows.

If you weren't so terrified, you would have found it very pretty.

It was like a castle.

Jeonghan opened the gate, letting you walk first before closing it again behind himself.

"They won't hurt you." Jeonghan mentioned noticing your tense shoulders. You didn't bother to reply at all, giving him the cold shoulder instead.

The door opened, and a strong smell of lavender invaded your senses.

It did kind of help to calm your nervousness and anxiety a little bit.

The floor was made of a shiny material that made the colors white and black shine as if they were made of glass.

They felt nice on your now-barefoot feet.

There was some really low music coming from one of the rooms.

And at the end of the hall, there were big, pretty intimidating stairs.

One man, with fair skin and ash blonde hair, walked down from the second floor, his shoulders bouncing up and down with each step he took.

He walked so relaxed that you really wanted him to make you believe he meant no harm.

"Hey." He greeted you as he walked past both of you, entering another room from the first floor.

"Have you seen Seungcheol?" Jeonghan asked him, his hand pushing you softly from your back towards the room the guy had just entered.

He shook his head, pouring himself a red drink in a glass. Your stomach suddenly felt sick once you realized what he was drinking.

Blood.

He took a bug-glup of it, sighing happily once the blood hit the back of his throat.

"I haven't seen him for the whole night." He spoke again, his teeth now looking quite red as well.

"I'm just waking up anyway; maybe ask Wonwoo?"

"Thanks, Vernon." Jeonghan replied, grabbing himself by the wrist and entering a spacious living room.

The place was huge. There were multiple armchairs. They were all white, and their cushions were red.

In the center of the room, there was a black piano and many paintings on the walls.

Your eyes instinctively moved to the large library that took up an entire wall.

Wonwoo, as you guessed, was a tall, slender young man with big shoulders and a small waist.

His hair was black, and his eyes were perusing the words of a book that must be at least a thousand pages long.

His eyes reminded you very much of the eyes of a cat.

"What do you need?" He spoke. His voice was deep and clear.

"Have you seen Seungcheol?" Jeonghan asked again.

"No. He probably went to the village. As far as I know, he had some business to take care of there." His eyes didn't move from his book, but the next question did take you by surprise. "What is she doing here?"

"Please, let me know when Seungcheol's back." Jeonghan replied instead, taking you to one of the rooms upstairs.

The bedroom was small—bigger than yours but way smaller than the two other rooms you have been to in that house. It had a big bed that could easily fit three people comfortably, maybe even four.

There were some plants here and there, but most of them were already too dry to bring back to life, and a big closet

There was nothing really personal there.

Nothing that screamed Jeonghan

So it did make you second-guess if that was actually his room.

"You can take a seat." Jeonghan offered, pointing at the small sofa under the window.

"I'm alright." You replied.

"It might take a while before he comes back; I really suggest you take a seat." He repeated himself. "Are you hungry? I can go downstairs and make you something to eat."

"No, I would rather go back home."

"Look, I know you're mad at me. I know that. I understand that. But I really did all that for your own good. There are things that you can never know happened—things that your brain removed for your own good. And if it were in my power—if it were up to me—I'd be telling you by now. All of them. In great detail. But I can't. Not without knowing how dangerous it is. So please trust me. I'm asking a lot, I know. But please let me do some research. Let me find out what's within my reach before I start talking and put us both in danger."

You remained silent but sat down on the couch, as Jeonghan had indicated.

Jeonghan breathed a sigh of relief, taking off the coat he had been wearing and putting it away in the closet.

"Would you like a sandwich? I'm sorry that's the best I can offer you, but as you must have discovered, our diet isn't the most diverse on the planet." Jeonghan offered with a small smile.

"Okay." You accepted, and your stomach was seconds away from starting to growl hungrily. "But not too big; my brother had promised me to cook dinner tonight."

It was an obvious hint you had thrown at him, and Jeonghan seemed to pick up on it just as quickly.

"I'll try to get everything done quickly so you don't have to miss your dinner." Jeonghan promised. "But I'm not sure how late Seungcheol will be."

You nodded, allowing Jeonghan to go and bring you something from the kitchen.

You could hear some noises here and there, but you purposely ignored them and distracted yourself with the view of the outside you had from Jeonghan's room.

The moon looked very beautiful that night.

"Thank you." You thanked Jeonghan, accepting the plate he was handing you. His cold fingers brushed against your fingers accidentally, and you wanted to think.

"I hope it tastes good."

"It does," you replied, taking a second bite.

Jeonghan watched you eat with a smile on his face. He seemed too happy with the outcome of his sandwich.

"You're not going to eat?"

"I can't." Jeonghan shook his head. "Anything other than...you know, it goes bad for my stomach."

"What if you eat human food, then?" you asked curiously.

"I throw up." Jeonghan replied calmly. "It's involuntary; I like to smell food." He added. "It reminds me of when I could eat it. But no matter how many times I try to eat it, it tastes bad to me."

"And how do you know when you have to...?"

Jeonghan chuckled softly. "I can sense when I need to hunt." He replied. "You can feel it in the back of my throat—the need to drink blood. My body gets cold."

Your eyes widened, remembering how Jeonghan's body temperature felt compared to yours.

"Don't worry, I'm not on the verge of having to go hunting yet or drink blood. My hands are the first to get cold."

"So you can't drink that until you feel it in your throat?" You tried to ask for help to calm your own erratic heart.

"Oh, no. I can drink whenever I want."

"Then why not drinking now? Don't you have blood downstairs?"

"Yes." Jeonghan took a deep breath, his eyes moving to yours. "But I don't want to scare you any more than you already are."

"I'm more terrified to know that you're in the same room as me with the slightest feeling of hunger." You confessed to him.

 

Jeonghan looked at you for a few seconds, contemplating your words and his options.

 

"Would you feel more comfortable with me drinking here or in the kitchen?"

 

"Here." You replied confidently. "I need to know if it's just as scary as in my dream."

 

You needed to start being able to distinguish what was true and what wasn't.

 

For your own sake.

 

Jeonghan nodded. "Very well, then."

 

He came back to the room with a bottle that, fortunately, made it impossible to see what it had in its interior.

 

He took one last look at you. "Are you sure you want to see this?" He asked.

 

"Yeah."

 

He nodded, taking a deep breath before his lips met the bottle. As the liquid started filling his mouth, his shoulders started being so tense, his eyes shut tight, and his forehead frowned as he took more and more of the blood.

His breath became more erratic, sounding as if he were fighting to fill his lungs with air.

 

He opened his eyes; they were full of red. His pupils were so dilated that you couldn't see where they started or where they ended.

 

A shiver ran through your body, not knowing what to make of his gaze on you.

 

It frightened you.

 

But it intrigued you.

 

You were unable to break eye contact.

 

With shaky legs, you stood up, walking closer to where he was.

He followed your every move, and as you got closer, the sound of the blood traveling down his throat became louder.

 

Your hands slowly approached the bottle, holding it on your own.

 

Jeonghan's eyes opened wide, but he freed the bottle from his own hand, letting you do whatever you wanted to do.

 

You held it intact for a few minutes until it was fully empty.

 

You sit down next to him, taking a quick look at the bottle and at his red lips.

 

"What does it taste like?" You asked him, trying to fill the awkward silence that had fallen on you both.

 

"Like chocolate." He joked. His eyes were still fully dilated. He looked drunk with blood. "Less sweet, though. Since it isn't fresh blood."

You nodded, looking away.

"So?" Jeonghan asked after some minutes, and you looked at him confused. "Was it like in your dream?"

"Oh," you replied, "no. I don't know. It wasn't really from a bottle there."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"Alright." He added, looking everywhere but you.

"Can you try it?" You asked him at the same time he was saying, "I should better bring that downstairs."

"What?" He asked, alarmed.

"Can you try it?" You repeated yourself, bringing your arm closer to him and uncovering your skin from the fabric that was covering it.

"No." He shook his head. Looking seriously at you. "Why would I ever do that?"

"I need it." You looked at him straight in the eyes. "I don't know what's real and what's not, and this is the only way. You were the one in the dream; I need to see if it is like that."

"You almost had a panic attack today when you saw me; do you think this is really the best idea? What if it is like your dream? How could that be of any help? I need you to trust me and understand that it wasn't me."

"Please."

"No."

"Just for one second." You tried again. "Please."

"Maybe another day. It was definitely a lot for a single day."

#seventeen #seventeen fanfic #seventeen fanfics #seventeen fic #svt au #seventeen au #seventeen imagines #svt fanfic #svt reacts #seventeen x y/n #seventeen x oc #seventeen x you #seventeen x reader #svt x y/n #svt x oc #svt x reader #svt x you #jeonghan fanfiction #jeonghan fluff #jeonghan fic #yoon jeonghan #jeonghan #jeonghan x y/n #jeonghan x you #jeonghan x oc #jeonghan x reader #jeonghan series #jeonghan scenarios #jeonghan au #seventeen fluff

[idkanametoputhere]

Lost Story

type: angst (slight comfort if you squint really hard)

pronouns: they/them

character: Vil Schoenheit × actor!reader

tw: death(²), reader is not yuu/the prefect, ghosts, mentions of shutting yourself away, the plot makes only SLIGHT sense (but idc), self-neglect, shitty news report

masterlist<3

two years..

it had been two years since vil schoenheit had died in a tragic accident while pursuing his passion, acting. it was an accident, really. a prop that was misplaced and not handled properly. a giant prop that ended up falling on him, delivering a fatal blow on his head, ending both his life and the production of the movie

everyone was devastated. his family, friends, schoolmates, fans, coworkers. especially that one coworker, another one in the acting buisness. another one who had been cursed by the bright, blinding stage lights of fame and the acting industry

they had worked with vil on so many projects, including his final one, the one that was left unfinished. an unfinished symphony. what was meant to be a movie of pure love and joy ended up as a story of grief and sadness

and in said grief, the young actor buried themself in work. they were busy, working in project after project, while avoiding the public eye unless it was for a premiere of a project they acted in. the dark veil of grief was too much for them to handle

and that is how they had ended up in a local theater, late at night, practicing their script. it was a small theater in their hometown, and the owners trusted them enough to give them a key of the theater so they could practice to their heart's content

and practice they did. they practiced until their eyes were burning with exhaustion, the lines on their script were getting blurry, and their voice was strained from repeating the same lines over and over

it was time for them to leave. they packed their backpack, gathered their script and phone, put on their jacket and started walking

until they heard it

"y/n"

a quiet whisper and an ice cold breath on their neck. a voice they had fought so hard not to forget, but they could recognize it amongst a sea of voices. it was him..

"vil?"

they asked and turned around. and there he was. the tall boy was in front of them. his blonde and purple hair neatly tied on a ponytail, wearing the same costume he wore on that final project and a soft smile decorating his face

shock could not begin to explain the emotion they were feeling. vil was there. vil was in front of them. vil, who had been hit in front of their very eyes, who they had visited in the hospital countless times, and on whose grave they had cried entire rivers of tears, was in front of them

"how..? I don't get it.." they whispered, staring at his ghastly form with wide eyes. "it doesn't matter. but I'm here, I'll stay here until the sunrise" replied the boy, a creepy cold breeze filling the room at the sound of his weirdly echo-y voice

"no, I'm just tired...I'm tired. I'm tired, or I'm going insane" they say with a nervous chuckle and look at him "you're dead, you can't be here" they continue, their voice sounding as if they're hanging onto their own words to prove that they haven't gone mental

instead of replying to them, ge embraced them, in an attempt to prove that he was there. the hug felt weird from their perspective. it was like hugging..cotton candy, or a bunch of strings. it was like hugging something that was there, but also wasn't

the two stayed in that hug for a while, clinging to eachother as if the other would disappear, maybe because they could..

it felt weird, so weird that they stopped questioning if that was reality or a trick of their mind. but they liked it. and so they made conversation with him, laughing and smiling, just like they did when he was alive. but time was passing, father chronos wasn't gonna wait for anyone, not even two hurt actors

and as sunrise was closer and closer, an..absurd question fell from the boy's lips

"may I have this dance, my lady"

he said with an air of confidence. it was a line he had told them many times before, not because of a liking to dancing, but because of a liking to practicing a certain scene

you see, the fatal final project of his, was a love story between two royals. two royals who were bound by the bond of a marriage arranged by their parents. but the two slowly fell in love, and the dance scene that the two actors loved was the moment that the two characters were confident that they were in love

so the two actors danced. they danced, and danced. they danced out the emotions of the two characters, and the emotions of their own selves, who were forced into separation, in contrast to the two characters they were playing. they danced until the young actor was exhausted, and the two ended up sitting in a corner of the stage

"you're gonna leave now..aren't you?" asked the actor that was physically alive, but their heart felt as if it wasn't beating, it had lost their passion. "yes..when the sun rises I'll disappear" answered vil, a melancholic tone decorating his voice. the other sighed, and rested their head on their semi-solid shoulder

"can we just stay like this for a while?"

"yeah"

and so they drifted off to sleep

.

.

"and now on to Erika, with a report about a recent tragedy that happened in the film industry"

"thank you Lionel. A true tragedy has hit the film industry, as the famous actor y/n l/n was found dead yesterday morning. according to the reports, the actor was found dead in a theater in their hometown, in which they used to practice. the doctors examination proves that the death was a result of a complication of l/n's health issues, as well as negligence of their own self.

after a brief interview with the actor's family and manager, all of them revealed that the negligence might have been a result of their grief over the famous actor vil schoenheit, who died two years ago and with whom l/n appeared to be very close with

now, Lionel, what makes this case truely mysterious and creepy even, is the camera footage from the theater. although the audio seems to be distorted, it's clear that l/n's is talking with someone, but they are alone in the theater. this goes on for hours until something even weirder happens

l/n stands up and starts performing a dance that many have recognized as a scene from the scrapped project that killed Schoenheit. it's even weirder that, without using magic, they pull of some steps that are impossible to do without a partner

whatever the case, this is a real tragedy. our hearts go out to the family and friends of l/n. may their soul rest in peace. back to you lionel"

and so the tale ends. a tale of unspoken love, separation, and reunion for all eternity..

a/n: OKAY MANY THINGS TO SAY. 1) I wrote this based off a scenario I made with a c.ai bot 2) IM BACK??? 3) my new phone's here AAAAAA 4) another fic with vil that includes dancing 5)I did this on c.ai 2 days ago, and I was expecting my period so I was emotional and almost made myself cry by writing it. now I'm on my period, so if I have ro suffer, all of you have to as well

#phantom's writing #disney twisted wonderland #twst #disney twst #twisted wonderland #twst disney #twst fic #twst angst #vil shoenheit x reader #twst vil schoenheit #twst vil #vil schoenheit #twisted wonderland pomefiore #pomefiore #twst fanfiction #twst fanfic #vil schoenheit angst #angst #twst drabble #twst third years #twst writing #twst wonderland #twst pomefiore #i just love angst #night raven college #i love this #actor au #gn reader #they/them #they dead

[viridiave]

A little love post to HORROR JRPGs

Content Warning:

So I'm gonna be talking a lot about some pre-Undertale era RPG Maker Horror games, and this post is gonna contain both spoilers and the discussion of the following:

Blood and Gore

Psychological horror

Child abuse

Sexual assault

Suicide

Violence

Fictional minors being put into very messed up situations, because that's just the kinds of games these are

Other upsetting themes

Hetalia (because I can imagine that all of us have very complex feelings about this fucking franchise. It existing feels like it needs a warning)

This post is a nostalgia trip and exists purely because uh. I have literally no one else to talk to about these games, and please just click away if any of the above makes you uncomfortable in any way. Some of this stuff can't exactly be handwaved as just being products of their time.

I'll draw smthn real quick later just to make up for it I promise

I'm like days late to Halloween but I just wanted to write this after getting a bout of nostalgia lmao

I absolutely fucking love Horror JRPGs - the freeware ones, even though I haven't touched one in a LONG time. I'm talking about the pre-Undertale era freeware games by the way, and in the first place I don't think I can consider Undertale a horror game but that's a topic for another day. OneShot also doesn't count aksjak OneShot gives me existential dread and a nonzero amount of guilt sure, but never terror

But let's dial that back a bit.

To begin with. 'Vir, you're a fucking coward, you run upstairs when you see that someone on TV has a gun. You can't stand watching horror movies. How the FUCK did this happen'

Weirdly, you can thank Hetalia for that. Specifically, the freeware Hetalia fangames that used to circulate on DeviantArt - that shit led me down this rabbit hole. And I guess it made sense, most Hetalia fangames are a coin toss between a horror game and a fantasy JRPG with countries getting isekai'd. I also played the fuck out of those.

For a bit of background, I love video games, but neither me nor my family ever really had that much spending power to buy game consoles, so my selection was pretty limited. Before I turned 18, I remember that we owned a GameBoy, a GameBoy Advance, a PSP, and one of those Fun-Sized Nintendo consoles with built-in games. We never bought cartridges either. I got my first DS from my dad on my birthday when I turned 18, and that's all the consoles that my family has ever owned. Still kinda jealous of my friends who have Switches, but eh - one day.

I just played a lot of Harvest Moon growing up, that's been my object of interest in my elementary days. The most of a horror game that I've been exposed to was watching my friends play Five Nights At Freddy's back in 5th grade.

Then high school happened, and I got new friends and shit - and was introduced to both more conventional horror games and Hetalia. Which is. A really weird combination when I think about it now, but everyone who was alive and kicking around in the early 2010's would know what HetaOni is, and you can see how that slope led to me playing freeware horror games. I'll always be grateful to these games, seeing as I never had easy access to mainstream experiences growing up.

I think I played HetaOni exactly once, on my first laptop. I played most Hetalia fangames exactly once, but they all just stayed on my old hard drive. None of them really had anything interesting going on gameplay-wise, I mean it's RPGMaker and these were people who just really wanted to make Hetalia fangames, but I remember some of them just sticking with me. I'd play them while I was away on trips to my grandmother's house, then watch let's plays on YouTube when I wasn't otherwise occupied with schoolwork. Really when I say Let's Plays I only mean KyoKoon64's - and that's how I was actually introduced to horror JRPGs.

CLOÉ'S REQUIEM

There's been a couple of times where they played some of the more recognizable horror JRPGs on their channel, but the first one I REALLY saw a playthrough on was one called Cloé's Requiem. I don't know what exactly it was about this specific game that stuck with me, and at the time I didn't know that this had like. More warnings than you would usually find on a horror JRPG. Calling it now, please look up said warnings before you try ANYTHING with this game - I can't promise quality and nuance, but I can promise great moments. Those moments stuck with me to this day, SOMEHOW, even after encountering games with better story and gameplay experiences… it's about a cursed 12 year-old boy trying to free a cursed 13 year-old girl, never getting a shot at the normal life he wanted and playing the violin because he can't do much else.

I think this game changed my life. Not in like, any grand manner mind you - but I feel like it's the game that best represented this time of my life as a weird high school outsider who obsesses over games that nobody's ever heard about. I was introduced to a lot of things through this game, it's just this whole volley of firsts that I wouldn't trade for anything else. Baby's first horror game, first jumpscare I ever consented to, first taste of games containing disturbing themes of sexual assault and gore, first trips to Pixiv and NicoNicoDouga - just all the fucking firsts. I wouldn't call it a great game, but it IS important to me.

When I think about it now, it's a game about curses. Michel D'Alembert is a talented violinist at 12, and his alcoholic father milks the shit out of this talent because they're not exactly what you would call well-off. His twin brother Pierre is a pianist, is nowhere near as talented as his brother, and hides his misery over this situation under a big-little brother façade. Cloé Ardennes is a pianist too, she's wealthy, talented, and still plays with her stuffed animals. She is cursed with an insane father who rapes her, and a mother who hates her. Charlotte is a young maid with nothing and tries her best, only to be killed because she happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. Unsurprisingly things fall apart for everybody very quickly.

Pierre's frustrations with his spoiled, lazy brother boiled over, and he curses Michel out in a heated moment. This drives Michel to murder their Charlotte by accident, and she becomes his curse - he runs out of the house, kills cats, and finds himself in the dilapidated mansion that Cloé inhabits. Cloé by this point is already dead, and so is her dad, her parents, and the maids. Cloé's father may be her curse but she is the curse of this mansion, and it transforms into something hostile until Michel comes along and saves her from the shadow of her father. Michel plays her a requiem, and resolves to go home to confront his crimes - and back to Pierre, who regrets everything he's done. Watching the sun rise with a disappearing Cloé in the True Ending will likely be the last peaceful moment he will ever have in his life.

That's like. Not everything that happens in this game, but this post is already so goddamn long and I still have a lot of other stuff I want to talk about. But the gist of it to me nowadays is that these children are cursed with loveless lives and the whims of the adults that have power over them. In the end, their lives are all ruined. Cloé and Charlotte are dead, and we have no idea what becomes of Michel and Pierre when word gets out that Michel killed a maid and assaulted several others in the house in a fit of emotional instability. In every other ending, Michel is killed and Cloé remains an evil spirit, so really this is the best that anyone ever gets out of this experience.

I remember watching a playthrough of Con Amore on YouTube, but I understood none of it because it was in Japanese, and the game itself was untranslated at the time. It follows the cats Noir and Blanc and basically serves as an addendum to the base game - honestly it made me feel sorry for Charlotte, who was nowhere near as psychotic as Michel thought she was. There's also light novels, but international shipping is expensive and I don't know Japanese so. I'll just never figure out what happens to everyone after the game ends I guess

One of these days, I'll buy the remake on Steam - which exists, and I can't say I recommend it if everything I just listed bothers you in any way. But I can't shake the attachment I feel towards this game no matter how many years it's been, nor how uncomfortable its themes are, so you know - maybe one day. I'll go back to it.

IB

So - following that, I got pretty curious about the other games in this genre of freeware horror. Ib is the one that everyone knows the best, both Markiplier and Pewdiepie played it so you KNOW it gets press, but even in Japan this game was a hell of a hit. To me, it's a simple game that I can finish in an hour, but man what an hour it can be.

If you were to play this game right now after seeing how much press it gets (which I think you should, it's on the Switch now! Go get it!), you MIGHT be a little disappointed. It's nowhere near as gory or disturbing as Cloe's Requiem for one and you know - a bunch of blood and guts and ghosts on the walls does not a good horror game make, but make your choices accordingly. Nah - instead this game's staying power lies in its atmosphere. Like how many games can you say take place inside of an art gallery where most of the pieces try to fucking murder you? I mean there's probably a lot, but something about Ib's almost ambient sense of dread and exploration just kind of sticks in people's brains. Everything's a little scarier when the shapes are so close to being discernable but aren't, and I guess that's the appeal and horror behind Guertena's gallery.

Ib herself is a mute protagonist, pretty typical, but she's also NINE, and the game will let you know that no matter how unfazed she gets or how precocious she can be, she is a child all the same - and children break very easily. I personally love how the game barely has to say anything about how shaken she actually is about her situation, because it will show you how - she has nightmares that you can't escape, she sees herself getting hanged, Garry will need to shake her out of her shock when she sees a picture of her parents in the gallery that should not exist. She loses all of her will to live when she loses Garry to insanity. And speaking of Garry…

There's one standout room in this game and it's the Doll Room. 10/10 would NOT recommend it to anyone who suffers from anxiety because WOW I did not think the RPG Maker 2000 engine could ever have been capable of that. Nobody blames Garry if this room fucks him up. I mean come on the dude has to literally rip open the stomachs of dolls to find a paint ball. Those sound effects make it sound like the dolls are made of skin and flesh and all the while the giant fucking doll is creeping out of the goddamn painting while some of the most anxiety-inducing background noise is playing -

Yeah no I don't know why I ever said you'd be disappointed by this game. Or maybe you still would, this is a low-res game made in 2012. But my god does it TRY to scare you in the best ways it can.

One of the best moments in this game I think is the one where Mary and Ib are alone together, and the conversation gets increasingly unhinged with Mary asking Ib questions non-stop with no background noise other than their steps. At this point, they're separated from Garry, and they're trying to find a way back to each other. Garry meanwhile is slowly piecing together the truth about Mary and how dangerous it is for Ib to remain alone with her, all the while still trying to figure out how to get back to both of them.

The section after that is in the Sketchbook which honestly? The vibes of this place are impeccable. Somehow it's fitting that one of the tensest areas in a game about a fine arts gallery is the place made entirely out of childlike scribbles.

Overall, I'd say the experience is well worth an hour or two - I'd recommend it happily over Cloé's Requiem, if only so you can have a taste of what Horror JRPGs were like before Omori came along. Yes I know that Omori isn't Japanese but it's very much in the same vein as these games.

OTHER GAMES

Those were the safe two that planted my feet firmly into the Horror JRPG fandom, but there's a lot of other titles out there, so let's go - lightning round!

Ao Oni is the ubiquitous one, like chances are you've at least HEARD of it in passing at some point in your life. Like this shit made it to the big screen in Japan, that's how much of a deal it was. I've never played the original myself, but it's partly because its formula of stuck in a mansion with a horror that chases you around is present in pretty much every Horror JRPG after its release in 2007. If you want some classic fun with the big blue demon though then you can't go wrong with the freeware version.

Mad Father and The Witch's House are part of what I like to call the Big 3 of JRPGs starring preteen girls experiencing the Horrors™, mostly because back in the mid-2010's I couldn't go three posts without seeing them all together. Mad Father is the only other one of said Big 3 that I've touched, because I was too coward to touch The Witch's House and Ellen's whole deal remains a mystery to me to this day. I think Mad Father got a remake a couple of years ago, so you can check that out if you want, but keep in mind that these two games in particular might not stoke the same kind of magical staying power that Ib somehow retained years after its release, and I know those two rely on jumpscares a lot more than Ib does.

I'll eat my fedora right here by the way, because one of my cardinal sins of being a Horror JRPG fan is that I've never played Yume Nikki. As far as these freeware games go, this is probably one of the more avant-garde ones - it's artsy, atmospheric, and a game best experienced by getting lost in the strange environments it provides. Out of every game on this post, this is the one I'd describe as the most Earthbound-esque, with its horror lying mostly in the surrealist ambience of just… wandering around in Madotsuki's mind. The end is just as quiet as the beginning, but is no less chilling to watch happen. Then you fuck around a little bit on Youtube and you find out what's actually going on, and uh - yeah that checks out, cosmic horror sounds par for the course at this point.

Yume Nikki and OFF are two of the games I think of when I hear about Horror JRPGs being talked about alongside Undertale - and nope, I haven't played OFF either. That's my other Horror JRPG sin. I was a picky teenager, but I've grown now and wow I need to find a time to play these games in peace. OFF actually isn't even Japanese, it was developed by Mortis Ghost and released in French back in 2008, making both pretty old and already pretty weird in the library. The reason I bring up OFF is because it's one of the older examples I know of that also incorporate Earthbound's precision 4th-wall breaks, and that it's a game about judgment and interrogates the player (more you than the Batter you play as, serving more as a vehicle that the game uses to ask questions through) about the choices they make in the game. OneShot is probably the one game in this genre of indie RPG that I know so far that employs this metaphysical idea of the player existing in the game in any kind of charitable fashion (aside from again, Earthbound and to some extent Mother 3), so between it, OFF, and Undertale they're what I'd refer to as the Interface Screw-RPG Trio.

Some other titles that I like are between the same devs, even some that I haven't really played to completion. Cloé's Requiem for example was made by Buriki Clock, and they've made other titles like Fantasy Maiden's Off Hideout and Trauma Traum - the latter I can't play because it doesn't have an English translation rip. Miwashiba is another dev which I think people who have a taste for light lolita goth-pastel colors would like, because my god the character designs in both Alice Mare and LiEat are peak. Don't even get me started on the fashion of 1BitHeart because everything in that game has such an impeccable aesthetic. I think I saw something at one point about 1BitHeart that like. Might count as a shared joke between Xenoblade fans, but I'd be hard-pressed to give context because again… packed schedule, who dis?

Just to talk about Alice Mare a little more, I've actually played this one - it sports a heavily storybook-inspired cast with some unique tastes on the tales. Most of my actual experiences with Alice Mare were from the English Light Novel, which I do still have! I really recommend it to people who have a couple of hours to spare on some light, relatively bloodless horror. Most of these games have Light Novels, come to think of it - hell Ib even has whole audio dramas, one of which was fanmade in English, and from what I remember of it the voice acting for Mary was PEAK.

One last dev I want to talk about is Segawa. I've saved them for last because their brand of horror is reserved mainly for one game, but their other games Farethere City and Tower of Hanoi are no slouches either. I don't know much about Tower of Hanoi (or if it even has an English translation right now), but Farethere City is a pretty cute experience as far as pseudo-horror games go from what I've heard, which is probably good for us because their other standout game is anything but cute.

END ROLL

Ah, End Roll. The last of the Horror JRPGs I've played before school kicked me even harder in the shins and I had barely any time for it. Out of all the games I mentioned on this list, this is the one with the most staying power in my brain - and also the one that influenced me the most.

So, I don't talk a lot about my original works. Nobody asks, so I don't overshare. But some of the prevalent overarching themes of my personal mythos are those of guilt, self-love, and the burdens of love. All of these themes were lifted directly from End Roll - which is to say, End Roll actually only deals in guilt, my brain just ran buckwild with trying to wrap itself around the logistics behind InfoRuss. One of my main protagonists, Rosso, is a dead-ringer expy of Russell - the same goes for Blanco with the Informant. One of the only ways I can describe Rosso and Blanco's relationship is 'selfcest as a metaphor for the painful coexistence of self-love and self-loathing', and how this relationship reached this point was largely thanks to the Informant and his role in Russell's dream.

I don't really know why I've come to associate the idea of self-love with guilt, because that's like. Not what the game is trying to do. The game's express purpose is to tell you the story of a boy who comes to love his victims and self-destructs under the crushing guilt that he carries from killing them. By some weird hand, I've fixated on the Informant and his determination in seeing that mission of the game through - AND his secret boss fight. Actually, I should. Go ahead and describe the build-up to his secret boss fight

You can only access it if you've purchased the optional villa, and if I recall correctly you can only fight him on the last day of the dream. The locked shed next to the villa is revealed to be a library of some kind called the Graveyard of Books and like - sure enough, there's books of every kind just torn apart and scattered about everywhere. The reason for all of this is because of the Informant's jealousy. He is created specifically so he can provide Russell with the necessary information to complete the Happy Dream Experiment, and in this regard he thinks Russell doesn't need anyone other source of information than him. So he does away with the useless other books, except for the strategy guides because that's the only kind of book Russell likes - and thus, the only kind of book that the Informant likes. Notes are scattered in the hallway leading up into his boss room, with the last one sticking out in my mind to this day:

'He thinks he's the most important thing to you.'

Which. I don't know why that line is so important to me. Whether it be because it awakened something weird in me, or because I myself was dealing with my self-loathing in a VERY complicated manner at the time, that line has gone on to dictate the way that I write about my characters even to this day.

It's such a visceral depiction of self-inflicted brutality. Russell Seager is a 14 year-old serial killer who grew up loveless and abused, and has no shortage of things that make every waking moment of his life fucked up. He killed people - some who just happened to be wherever he was at the time, some willingly by his hand - could not feel guilt about any of it, and when he lost Yumi to his drunken father while his nymphomaniac mother watched he snapped and killed both his tormentors. He then turned himself in to the police, a teen on death row. Happy Dream is him discovering guilt through dream versions of the people he killed. Happy Dream is what allows him to manifest the newfound emotions he felt through interacting with the kinds of people that his victims COULD have been. The world he creates morphs into the self-inflicted hell that is his guilt.

Russell has no happy ending, his guilt won't allow him that. Everything around him becomes a reminder of the lives he's destroyed, and how much of a living hell his own life was. Through feeling happiness and love from these fabricated visages of the people he killed, he learned guilt. It's such a weird exercise in sympathy, knowing that you're playing as this remorseless kid going through rehabilitation through extreme means. It either doesn't work, and he's deemed a failure - or it does, and he commits suicide either by confessing his crimes to one of his victims and stabbing himself to death with a syringe, or he stays in the deteriorating dream, never to wake up again.

At some point it honestly just turns into misery porn, if you look at it from a certain angle - this game is set on having Russell die no matter what. I couldn't tell you what EXACTLY it is about this experience was so impactful that it would go on to influence the way I want to spend my life - that is, I want to make games exploring these kinds of themes. Guilt. Sins. If loveless lives can be redeemed and made better. By the time the last day in the game rolls around, it's just a matter of giving Russell closure over his miserable life and choosing for him what his last freedom is going to be.

I think one of the reasons I like thinking about the Informant with regards to Russell is the scene that happens if you choose to go through with the first True Ending. Russell never really much liked the Informant, and the feeling is mutual. Russell is cold to him, and the Informant takes every opportunity he can to rub all of Russell's sins in his face - and that's his job, he represents the fundamental, uncomfortable truths of Happy Dream. If Russell chooses not to leave the dream, he is resigned to its destruction and waits for the inevitable along with the other denizens of Nameless Town. But if Russell chooses to get out of the dream, the Informant returns to Russell in tears, happy that he can finally be back to being a part of him - to this game, it's the ultimate acceptance. Russell then goes on to confess his crimes and the reality of the dream to one of the citizens, and he wakes up when they kill him in tearful retribution by his request.

He grabs the syringe next to his bed, and stabs himself to death, unable to handle the guilt. That's how the game always ends for me. The Informant succeeded, Happy Dream succeeded - and Russell chose to die as person who could finally feel remorse.

It's a regretful story with themes that really shouldn't be replicated in any fashion in real life, but somehow I found it fascinating in the way it explores the facets of the self. It makes me want to ask more questions and explore that angle of self-reflection to the furthest extremes that I can conceivably reach, and I guess that's one of the many reasons why I respect it so much.

SO… WHAT NOW.

Nah, that's kind of it. Like, OF COURSE this isn't all I have to say about the games that I mentioned, but wow this post is so long and I was just pining for the days of a couple of years ago. These games were present for the most transformative years of my life, and uh - whether or not that was actually a good thing remains to be seen, but I'll always be grateful for their presence in the void that I call my gaming experiences.

Horror JRPGs will always have a special place in my heart for how they tell their stories. Nowadays, I've developed more of a taste for fantastical RPGs that prefer to hide their horror in the margins of the narrative, fridging the terror for when the player wants to step back a bit and think about the implications of certain events in the greater world. Undertale, OneShot, and the Octopath Traveler games all tick that box for me - and all of those games are ones I hold dear. Like I'll probably ramble about OneShot some other day, because that's the other game that really changed my life in a way I felt like I can never come back from - but there's just a lot of special things to be said about these neat little self-contained, 6-hour freeware games. For now I'll close this long-ass post out. Happy late Halloween I guess - the M&Ms in our fridge have never tasted better.

#rpg maker horror #rpg maker #horror rpg #ib rpg #cloe's requiem #end roll rpg #ao oni #mad father #the witch's house #OFF rpg #yume nikki #alice mare #farethere city #cw horror #seriously please read the content warnings

[keep-it-krispy]

LMK Ride Or Die AU

The AU is (relatively) parallel to cannon up to a point.

Sun Wukong (60), World famous Dancer and musician, wants to retire. He holds a battle of the bands style contest in Megapolis (his hometown), in which the winner will receive his Lucky golden Microphone (staff equivalent), and the opportunity to become his apprentice.

Mac (Macaque) is a bass player/beatboxer/break-dancer who turns out to be Sun wukong's twin brother, the black sheep of the family.

MK (21), a college freshman that works part time at his adopted father's noodle shop “Pigsy’s noodles” [his name is Paul, (42)], and a music prodigy with the uncanny ability to learn any instrument in under an hour, thinks it would be neat to enter the contest with his friend Mei [(22, Popular Twitch streamer and music buff, Heiress of the dragon family (Old Money)], who has been wanting to start a band since forever.

They convince Tang [(38, Paul’s Husband, accomplished Scholar and teacher at Malin’s college)] to be their manager, and recruit Sandy [(43, Ex con, Lyricist/poet, and lifetime friend of Paul] to write their songs. Calls themselves “the Monkie Kids”.

Red Kingston [(23), Red Son] A robotics genius trying to break into the music industry to spite his parents; Penelope Kingston [(48), princess iron fan, retired actress] and Bruce Kingston [(52), Demon Bull King, founder of Bullcorp [Apple equivalent Tech company]] decides to compete; seeing it as an opportunity to kickstart his career.

Other notable competitors are Jin and Yin (20) [Soundcloud rappers and Classmates of MK], and Malin Meister [(19), Nonbinary Social media influencer, rising Independent Artist/performer, and child of the late Laura Demona (58, Lady Bone Demon alternate, once an Actress and bitter Rival to Sun Wukong)].

The Monkie kids win, and MK gets chosen as Wikongs’s successor.

Red acts as the main antagonist, until new competition in the form of Spider Queen (22, Melissa bitsy) and her lackeys show up and threaten to throw the rest of them into obscurity, forcing them to work together to take her down.

For the main group, the majority of the plot goes much the same way as the cannon story; The crew learns the ins and outs of music production, how to operate in the music industry, improve their skills, compete to get gigs, become closer as a group;

But things get shaken up for Malin and Milton [(21), The not mayor alternate. Son of a corrupt politician/ Businessman who’s always overseas, trust fund kid. Plays right hand man/platonic life partner to Malin. He loves their 5D chess like approach to navigating life, and relies on their devastating smarts, weirdly accurate prediction skills, and artistic talent to get by] a week or so after Wukong’s contest.

Malin finishes editing their latest video, and decides to get something to eat as they wait for it to upload. They leave their office and go downstairs to see Milton standing, dazed and confused, in their Livingroom.

At least, they thought he was Milton. Until the actual Milton knocks at their door.

[”Oh, you don’t need to worry about me. I’m fine.” Milton smiles. Malin is about to respond, when they feel a faint buzz in their pocket.

They look away from him to check their phone, face twisting in mild worry ”Are you certain you're okay, Milt? You never come over unannounced, and you've been acting pretty weird since you got here. something has to be wro-….” the words die in their throat as they unlock the device, confusion blossoming forth, as the text {”I'm outside.”} **was displayed on the screen, Clearly sent from Milton's phone number. Their blood ran cold, looking back at the man they had previously believed to be their friend, and seeing no phone in his hand.

It was strange, Malin hadn't noticed before. He looked exactly like Milton, from his head to his toes. He had the same voice, the same verbal ticks and gestural mannerisms; even his clothes resembled something they had seen on their friend before.

His eyes, though. Pure white, with no Irises or pupils, emanating a soft light they had previously mistook for the sun shining weirdly through the window. It was in that moment Malin realized that he hadn't blinked even once. during the whole conversation he had just sat there, not blinking or breathing. For a whole hour.

They looked at the front door, a sick feeling rising in their stomach as they made their way over. “Milton” made no move to stop them, just leaning back on the couch and crossing his legs with that familiar disarming smile. Malin gripped their self control with hands of iron composure, gulped, and opened the door.

…

……

……….

That was not Milton.]

They throw open the door, grab the real Milton and bolt, thoughts flashing between a reasonable “strange man broke into my house” to a maybe not as unreasonable as previously thought “Shape-shifters that want to steal our skin”

Of course, the mayor has unspeakable Eldritch power, so it's no chore for him to chase them both all over town and heard them into Milton’s manor. Once safely locked inside, cornered and terrified, The mayor explains to them that he’s from an alternate universe, answers their questions, assures them that he's not going to hurt them, basically waiting for them to stop panicking.

When the both of them calm down enough to make sense, he demands asks if he can stay with one of them until he can “find a way back to his universe”. he Just needs to rest here for a while “And then I’ll be out of your hair.” The threat behind his words Is crystal clear, and while Milton is sick with unease, Malin is confident in their ability to Handle This.

Milton takes Malin aside to discuss this with them

[”……. You have a plan, right?” “Milton, I appreciate your faith in me. But I'm not a miracle worker.” “Mal- come on. there has to be a way out of this.” “A wise man once said: Sometimes the way out isn't over, or around; but straight through.” “….I don't like this..” “If you're scared, he can stay at my house-” “No way.” “Then the only way out is..” Milton sighs, Malin pants him on the shoulder “We can rotate, I take him every other week.” “Mal I… I don't feel comfortable leaving you alone with this guy-”

“Every other week?” The Mayor interrupts from his spot on the other side of the room “That sounds like a great idea! That way, I can spend an equal amount of time with the both of you..”

They both take a moment to look at the man, standing well out of normal hearing range. Disquiet displayed on One, and determination emanating from the other “… Are you sure?” “Are you doubting my abilities?” “No- I'm worrying about your safety.” “I thought that was my job?” “Malin.” “I'll be fine, Milt. Just trust me.” Milton takes a breath “….. Always.]

And that was that. For the rest of the season the Mayor just kinda hangs out, helping around when he feels like it, advising them when they need it, being creepy when he thinks its funny, learning about their world. Malin’s just wondering when he'll get around to killing them.

Malin and Milton, go on to do their villain thing, plotting the downfall of “The Monkie Kids”.

A month before the main story, Malin discovered something that tied Sun Wukong to the death of their mother (its a long story), and has been waiting for an opportunity to do something about it ever since they found out.

Participating in his contest was a bust, so they move on to Constructing a plan around the annual Lunar New Year Music Deathmatch Tournament, Which Malin is certain The Monkie Kids will be participating in.

They plan to orchestrate a scenario that will allow them to confront Sun Wukong at the event; the result of said confrontation either being closure, or a domino effect that will defame Sun Wukong, destroy the main crew’s friendship, careers, and everything they’ve built; All the while boosting their own fame in one go.

Destiny, Fate, and inevitability is gonna be a big theme in this AU. In cannon, The Lady Bone Demon used the spider queen and her failure to kickstart her own conquest. This conquest causing the entire series to focus on her downfall.

And much of the same was supposed to happen in this alternate universe. Maybe not step for step and word for word, but the ultimate goal was congruent.

Spider queen’s crew would come back for vengeance. Malin would “assist” her, maneuvering her into a position that would briefly look like victory, a position that would place Sun Wukong within Malin's reach. Malin would confront him, and he would tell them that “Laura got herself killed.”

Outside events would prevent him from elaborating (he didn’t do it), and Malin would take that as a confession. In the wake of The Monkie Kids victory, The unfairness of it all would drive Malin to do everything in their power to take “The Monkie Kids” down, Ultimately resulting in their own defamation, abandonment, and eventual destruction.

But the introduction of the mayor had changed things.

Weirdly enough, the Mayor wasn't very secretive. Milton and Malin Didn't exactly know what they expected from an ancient, eldritch, space warping, gravity defying, scary as hell demon guy claiming to be an alternate universe version of one of them, but “being an open book” was absolutely not it.

He answered all of their questions, shared events that happened in his universe readily, and was more than happy to divulge information Malin couldn't even pry out of their own mother (when she was alive). Perhaps it was because nothing either of them could do would ever hurt him, Perhaps it was because he knew the both of them were too terrified of him to Inquire something that warranted more than a surface level explanation, perhaps he just didn't care, but the end result was the same.

One day before the Lunar New Year Music Deathmatch Tournament, Malin was standing in their living room, Watching the front of their house through the window. All of the arrangements had been made, the stage was set, And the show was ready to begin. All they were waiting for was a phone call from Milton, confirming that the last of the loose ends had been tied up.

The Mayor watched as well; He had been watching this whole time. This human was an interesting kind of dull. The way their eyes diligently snapped across every room showed their constant awareness of their surroundings. The intentional nature of their word and action, from the tiniest of gestures to the loudest of voices, spoke of iron self control. The extensive charts, lists, notes, and written observations on every being they have, are, and/or will ever meet demonstrates their borderline obsession with manipulation and control; however, the location in which they kept these documents exposes either simple civilian ineptitude, or a total lack of care for who might walk in and see it

[Opening the door, he was greeted with quite the spectacle. An entire room filled with documents and poster boards and conspiracy charts on every individual he had seen them interacting with, they even had one on him!

The war room isn't much of a surprise. It was true that Malin didn't look like the plotting and scheming type, but extensive interaction with them would at least clue one into their acute awareness of other people and their lives. In his eyes, it was a show of social competency; he was a little impressed with their attention to detail. But, Really? Above ground?? Just out in the open??? not even a lock on the door????).]

Malin was most like his lady, their mother, in the way that they approached the world. How they took it, struggling and fighting, into their merciless hands and gently shooshed it until it came to heel. They hungered for it’s salvation, and destruction in equal measure.

They would make a fine replacement.

It was in this moment that the Mayor decided to reveal to Malin what had happened to his version of her mother, Explaining every event, beginning to end, in full detail and leaving out nothing.

When Malin hears about their alternate mother’s plans, actions, and her subsequent downfall; and draws the parallels between those events and events in their life; They realize that they are very close to setting off a series of events that just might spell their own downfall… They stop, and they think.

Mayor expects his words to cause them to turn to him for help (trying to lure them into accepting his Eldritch power, warlock style) but is surprised when Malin instead calls Milton to cancel their dastardly plot.

[They get this… feeling in their chest. Like a chime ringing deep within their soul, and come to a decision. The phone rings for a moment, once again, and then three times. Milton’s voice filters through the speaker.

{”The arrangements have been made, we wait for your confirmation”}

“There has been a change of plans. Cancel the envoy, I’ll compete myself.”

The other end is quiet for a moment, Malin hears his silent confusion clear as day. One might worry for a seed of doubt using this moment to take root and sprout, but Malin knows better. At the end of the day, their friend beholds their word for gospel. It seems that this instance is no different.

{”Okay, Milton out.”}

The line goes dead, and Malin pulls the phone from their ear to look at the dark screen. They’re usually grateful for such a loyal and obedient ally; but they worry for him, sometimes.

”I’ve no reason to worry, you’re usually right about everything…”

they sigh, oh Milton..

Malin turns to face The Mayor, face set in concentration as a new plot began to blossom in their mind “I will not bend to the wheel of fate, nor will I fall as my mother has. As any version of her has. There is another way, There always is.”

Oh? A mote of anticipation rises alongside his surprise, the Mayor feels a familiar smile creep onto his face “Then what will you do?”

Malin looks back out the window, watching as Mk and his friend once again cut through their neighborhood; completely unaware of the jaws of death that always loomed nearby.

They turned back to him, looking over their shoulder as the light of a new idea shone through the crumbling cracks of the old one “I’m going to make some new friends.”

#lego monkie kid au #lmk au #lmk mk #lego monkie kid #lmk #lmk mei #lmk mayor #lmk sun wukong #sun wukong #This idea just kind of possessed me #so #here you go i guess #LMK : Ride or Die

[juicycoutureheaux]

Hey yall! It’s been a minute since I posted on Tumblr! I just want to let you know my series: When it’s over is alive and well on Ao3. I stopped posting chapter updates on here because I felt like I was clogging up the tags.

This prompt was inspired by an AI chat prompt weirdly enough. (So if you’re reading this and you made the chat please message me so I can tag u bb!)

Anyway here’s a product of me being sleep deprived and literally just being mushy in general. I seriously wrote this last night before I went to bed and it hasn’t been edited. I may go back and edit, I just figured releasing this fic into the wild wasn’t the worst thing I could do.

This is a fluffy kind of OOC fic for Chris Redfield. I hope y’all enjoy

“Late night feeling”

A Chris Redfield x reader fic

Tags: fluff, migraines mentions of death, intimate but platonic relationships, younger woman X older man dynamic

You were resting after a rough deployment. You had made it back to the BSAA barracks and returned to your small room that had just enough space for your twin size bed, a desk and some shelving.

You had made the space work to the best of your advantage; free housing meant you had to get creative but you managed to make your small room as welcoming as possible.

The other soldiers were used to the barebones when it came to accommodations, and usually you didn’t mind when you were out on deployment, but when you were stateside you made sure to have all the comforts you could fit in the tiny room.

Pretty soon, you were popular in your unit for having just about anything. Did somebody have a headache from the dry air? You had a humidifier. Somebody needed some extra toiletries but didn't want to leave the building? You always had spare supplies. Cold medicine? You had it.

Pretty soon you were known as “mom” despite being on the younger side. It made you proud, because your position was technically as a medic, and it meant more to you that you could care for your teams stateside as well.

You were studying the popcorn ceiling in the small room for the 50th time, trying to get yourself to get to sleep when you heard a knock on your door.

You opened it thinking it was another soldier needing something small, but were shocked to instead see Chris Redfield, Captain of multiple elite task forces and founder of the BSAA.

You didn’t know whether to salute or curtsy, you were so close to falling asleep and were delirious

He smiled at your obvious discomfort. “I heard from the guys earlier you were the one to see if I needed anything.”

You looked at him wide eyed, still shocked that he came to your room late at night. He must really need something bad.

“Y-yeah, I’m sort of the barracks *mom* of sorts.” You giggled nervously. “What can I get you?”

Chris sighed. “Do you have anything for migraines?”

You looked at Chris, thoughtfully.

“I have a couple of solutions, how long have you had symptoms?”

Chris looks at you, you can tell what he’s going to tell you he’s embarrassed about. “…4 hours.”

You looked at him in horror. You knew Redfield was hardcore, but you had some migraines yourself before, if he was seeking your help, it must have been pretty intense.

Without thinking, you mentally switched into caretaker mode.

You quickly pulled the covers on your bed, and pulled out a foam wedge you had underneath your bed that you used to get comfortable for reading or watching tv.

Chris couldn’t help but grimace through his pain.

“Are you used to having late night visitors Y/L/N?” He looked at the foam wedge. “What the hell is that for?”

You snapped your head back at him. “What are you insinuating?” Genuinely curious, did he think you were going to treat his migraines by fucking him?

Chris grimaced again. “I hear you younger girls are into some wild things these days, but I didn’t expect it from you.” He put his hands up defensively. “More power to you though.”

You laughed from your belly. “Captain with all due respect, I think you’re seriously confused on what this is for.” You placed the wedge close to the foot of the bed. “Plus, if that’s how you think we’re gonna fix your migraine, you’re seriously confused on what my job here is.” You smiled at him.

You had only worked with Chris a couple of times. He wasn’t a stranger to you by any means, but you definitely weren’t friends either.

He was your superior and you respected him. The first time the two of you had met, you were a new recruit trying to make it onto the field.

You had passed every cognitive test the BSAA had to offer, but your physical skills were shit to say the least. You were athletic, you were great when it came to stamina, but when it came to hand to hand combat and firearms, you hesitated.

You remember the disappointed look your supervisor gave you when review time came. You were extremely gifted when it came to observations and patching men up, but you were a liability on the field.

“Get used to seeing the inside of the clinic, sweetheart.” You remembered him saying to you.

You remember going to the gun range, it was late in the afternoon and you thought no one was there. You were crying while missing the target completely. You knew you looked insane, but damn you felt so good.

“Why the hell can’t I just do this one simple thing?” You remember saying out loud to yourself. “The stupid boys back home could do this shit, but I doubt they could suture up flesh, and I can’t deploy because of this one thing!” You said louder emptying the clip into the target.

You pressed the button that brought the target to you. You looked at it helplessly; the bullets holes were all over the place. You crumpled the paper furiously into your hands.

“That's one way to neutralize a target,” you heard a warm baritone behind you say.

You turned around to see Chris Redfield with his own gear, ready to begin his own practice.

You saluted him. “Captain Redfield, Sir.”

He saluted you back. “At ease soldier, you don’t have to be so formal, no one else is here.”

“Y-yes sir.”

He walked closer to you, clearly in his element.

“I heard news on your performance review, Y/L/N. That’s brutal.” He said, trying to sound comforting.

Your lip quivered, you were angry and disappointed in yourself. You wanted to angry-cry, but not in front of one of the founders of the BSAA. He probably already thought you were weak, crying would just exacerbate the issue.

“It was.” You said looking down.

He looked at you sympathetically, and put his arm on your shoulder. “You have an incredible brain though.” He said, trying to lighten the mood. “We were really pulling for you this time, we need more personalities like you on the field.”

You looked up at him. “Really?”

Chris smiled at you. “I definitely don’t picture you in spec ops anytime soon, but we definitely could use you in damage control.”

You returned his smile.

“But you also understand why we can’t send you out there unprepared, you could be ambushed anytime.”

“I understand.” A heavy tear fell from your left eye and you immediately wiped it away, in fears of Chris noticing.

He looked at you sympathetically, “It’s normal, not being able to just want to shoot a living thing.”

“But why is it so easy for everyone else? I just can’t do it!” You said, frustrated.

“I think it’s because you’re overthinking it.” He shifts on his feet. “Think of it this way, if someone was going to hurt someone you cared about, even slightly, wouldn’t you not hesitate to take them down?”

You honestly had never thought about it before. You really were thinking of BOWS like victims, but if it were between you and your fellow soldiers getting out alive you wouldn’t hesitate.

Chris saw the gears in your brain working. “I knew it.”

“Knew what?”

“You think of them like they’re normal people, and they definitely may have been at one time.” He sighed, running his hand through his hair. “But you can’t think of them like that, it’ll get you killed, rookie.”

“Yessir,”’

“You know,” he said, picking up his duffle bag with his arsenal of personal weapons. “I actually have free time this evening, can I show you a couple of things?”

You looked up at him, shocked he would even want to spend one of his rare free moments with a dumbass like you.

“Are you sure? I know you’re always busy, are you sure you want to spend it mentoring my ass?”

“I don’t have anything else better to do, plus I see potential in you, rookie.” He motioned for you to follow him to the lane you were at before he came in.

He positioned himself behind you to perfect your form, gently touching your biceps and arms. He had a strong, but gentle grip on you. You tried not to turn into a teenage girl at his touch, but you seriously hadn’t got any action in a long time.

Chris, remained professional as always; if he noticed that you were crushing on him in the moment he didn’t acknowledge it, he just focused on the task at hand.

The afternoon turned into late in the evening, but you were finally comfortable with shooting your gun.

“Look at you, that was maybe 3 hours of proper training?” Chris looked at your work. “Looks like you’ll be out in the field in no time.”

Chris’ kindness stayed with you, and you were able to get into a lower ranking team, but a team nonetheless. You were finally able to help on the ground.

Now, Chris was looking to you for help and you couldn’t disappoint him.

“I’m going to have you sit down on my bed, okay? I promise I’m not gonna try anything funny with you okay?” You joked with him. Trying to lighten the mood.

“Honestly Y/L/N, I’m in so much pain, I’m willing to try anything.” He said sitting down.

“Good.”

You instructed him to lay down, putting the wedge underneath his calves, elevating his feet. You then grabbed a thick towel from one of your drawers and rolled it up. You gently placed the towel under his neck and made sure to keep his head supported with a pillow.

Chris grunted.

You looked down at him worried. “Are you okay?”

“Oh yeah,” he breathed out. “This is the best I’ve felt in a while.

“Good!” You chirped. “Where’s your pain radiating from?” You asked, getting up to turn on the humidifier. You knew from your own experience warm steam always helped, especially since it was December and seemed to worsen migraines.

“It feels like it’s behind my eyes, but it really does feel like it’s all over.”

“Is that normal for your migraines?” You asked putting hand sanitizer on. You had an idea of what you were going to do, but you wanted to make sure.

“Recently, yeah. I sustained a pretty bad neck and head Injury a couple years ago and they worsened from there.” He said, closing his eyes. His voice lowered like he was starting to get some relief.

“Are you okay with me touching you, Captain?” You said hesitantly.

“Of course, Doc.”

You smiled. “Not a doctor, but I think I can help.”

You began massaging the base of his neck, gently pulling his head to realign his spine. You were going at it for a couple of minutes before you heard him groan.

You stopped for a moment. “Still okay?”

“Better than okay. Can you keep going?” He asked sheepishly.

You were thankful he had his eyes closed, because his tone made you blush.

You began to let your hands move to his temples massaging the tense muscles in his face.

“You really carry a lot of stress,” you said trying to make his facial muscles relax manually.

“I guess 20 years of fighting monsters will do that to you.” He said bluntly.

“I’m sorry Captain-“ you stammered.

“Y/N drop the captain shit, it’s Chris. Please call me Chris when we’re alone.” It almost sounded like a plea.

“Yessir.”

He smiled, lightening the mood again. “I bet they ate you alive in boot camp.”

You smiled. “They did, but I survived.” You giggled.

You began to work your fingers over his sinuses, being sure to gently, but firmly relieve the tension in his face. Your fingers gently caressed a couple of mostly healed scars over his handsome face.

“I heard you got to see some action in the desert, Y/L/N.”

You sighed. It was a sensitive topic for you right now, but you didn’t want to offend Chris. “Yeah, I had to shoot my first aggressor.”

“You sound upset.”

“It was just,” You sighed heavily, trying to push the image of the infected soldier from your memory.

“We don’t have to talk about it.” Chris said, opening your eyes to meet your gaze. Before that moment you hadn’t realized how intimate this interaction was with him. His head was in your lap on a pillow, supported by your crossed legs.

“I knew him.” You said quietly.

“I heard he was one of our guys,” Chris said, his tone tinged with a slight sadness.

“He always was so shy and he was so into his routine it was funny. The other members would always clown on him.” You were reminiscing about your comrade.

“I always keep snacks in my room, and one day he broke his routine to see if I had anything. I was so happy that he asked me for something, that I kept buying the same snack so he would keep coming to me, I just wanted him to feel like I had his back.” You started to sniffle, feeling a burning sensation in your sinuses.

“I don’t know what happened he came back from

recon fine, I had just patched him up; then he turned.” You couldn’t help but tremble, Chris felt this and sat up.

You were slightly surprised by his sudden actions, he turned to face you.

He held your shoulders. “I need you to promise me that you’re not going to let this destroy your life Y/N. Remember what I said, it was either you or him.”

“But why did it have to be him?” You let your emotions go. You began to cry, you were wiping your own tears when Chris wrapped his arms around you. It immediately took you off guard.

He just held you, the warmth of his body radiating onto yours, you no longer felt so cold and lonely. He slowly let go of the embrace.

“I’m sorry.” You whispered.

“Don’t apologize, that’s a lot to have on your heart.” Chris looked at you more seriously this time. “Have they done your mental evaluation yet? You guys didn’t get back that long ago.”

You let out a sigh. “Honestly, after all that work to get me in this unit, I think I’m about to fail and be released because of a psych evaluation.”

Chris looked at you sympathetically.

“I guess it wasn’t meant to be, I really am just not cut out for this am I?” You pulled your knees to your chest.

He placed a warm hand on your leg.

“You’re doing just fine, the first kill is always the worst, but it doesn’t get easier. You just get tougher.”

You instinctively put your hand over his and squeezed. “I can’t imagine what you’ve seen, what keeps you going?”

Chris rubbed his hand over his face, his migraine had disappeared finally. “I wanted to stop getting close to others, I wanted to shut down, stop caring about people.”

You rubbed his arm and felt him shiver.

“But, that wasn’t who I am. I’d never stop caring, it was the reason I joined the Air Force and the RPD. It just led me…here.” He trailed off.

“We can’t control what happens to us, is what you’re saying, right Chris?”

He smiled. “Exactly. We can control how it affects us. You’re a sweet girl Y/N, I couldn’t stand to watch this line of work harden you.”

You blushed at the sweet girl comment.

“Well I guess then you’ll be happy that I’m thinking of going to TerraSave.” You said, nervous of how he was going to react.

Instead of looking at you with disgust like you had anticipated, he was excited.

“TerraSave? Really? I’m close with a major player over there, maybe I can tell her you’re interested.”

Your heart sank at the mention of a woman he was close with, you knew you never had a chance with him, but you liked to indulge in the healthy fantasy every once in a while.

“That would be great.” You said sheepishly.

“She’s my sister in case you’re wondering.” He winked at you.

You were embarrassed that your face gave it away that you were jealous.

He then boldly lifted your chin with his hand. “If you end up working for TerraSave, there won’t be any rules against taking you out on a date either.”

“Chris, really?” You laughed. You were in shock.

“I like a woman who doesn’t know when to stop,” he winked at you.

“You’re disgusting.” You playfully hit his shoulder.

He feigned defensiveness. “Hey, I was talking about not giving up on reaching a goal, I don’t know where your mind went to.”

You felt your self melt, he was so dreamy, exactly like you imagined. “I never thought I’d see this side of you, Chris. It’s nice.”

He cupped your face with his hand and you instinctively leaned into his palm.

“It helps when I’m with someone who’s able to bring it out of me” he said, stroking your face with his thumb.

You felt equally relaxed with him too, so relaxed that you let out a yawn.

Chris only chuckled. “I guess it is late, huh?” He said gently pulling his hand away.

You whined at the sensation.

“Don’t get bratty on me now,” he laughed.

You put your head into your hands. “How’s your head?”

“Much better,” he sat up straighter. “Crazy what a few moments of relaxing can do.”

You smiled at him, “Feel free to come to my room anytime.”

#chris redfield #resident evil fanfiction #chris redfield x reader #resident evil #fanfiction #resident evil fluff #ooc