#being woman

[ladamaglam]

Ma tu cosa cerchi, ma tu, perché mi cerchi?

Cerco la Donna con cui potermi allontanare dal mondo, spegnere il cellulare, stare bene, staccare la testa, ridere, bere del buon vino, chiacchierare di tutto in totale assenza del giudizio...

Cerco la Donna con cui per una sera essere un Uomo Libero e potermi dimenticare di tutto domani....

Domani poi, è come se nulla fosse accaduto, nella mente nessun pensiero, nessun timore, è rimasto tutto lì dove lo abbiamo lasciato, dove sono state rinfrancate le anime, distanti dal mondo, distanti dalle maschere, nudi nel vero senso della parola.... anche se con gli indumenti completamente abbottonati addosso...

Perché nudo veramente, cara Dama, lo posso essere solo con una Donna come te.

#ladamaglam #mature lady #lady boss #donna #being woman #complicity #complicità #40anni

[soundwavefucker69]

bastille has done more for the queer community by just making all of their love songs about "you" instead of specifying a gender than taylor swift has in all of her discography. thanks for coming to my ted talk.

#shrooms is talking #anti taylor swift #i can't believe y'all got mad at this woman for being straight #of course she's fucking straight #gods bless #stop trying to turn her into a queer icon #she's never gonna be a queer icon

[emotinalsupportturtle]

David Tennant being a lifelong Doctor Who fan who was inspired by the show to act, becoming the Doctor and Ncuti Gatwa who watched David Tennant and was inspired to act, playing the Doctor opposite David’s Doctor is the most beautiful thing

#This is a fanboy moment of immense proportions #Also they are both so silly it’s perfect #Dw spoilers #Doctor who #david tennant #ncuti gatwa #10th doctor #14th doctor #15th doctor #I’m just thinking of “I saw a regeneration scene on tv aged 3 and decided to be an actor” tennant #And ‘I watched David Tennant”s hamlet before drama school and realized that’s what an actor should be and what I should aspire to” ncuti #And that hug is so wholesome #it’s really come full circle #Also we can’t forget Mel for being the no 1 hype woman there

[inkskinned]

what is with men being mad any time a woman raises her voice where did that even come from. someone posted a video of a small electrical explosion, and the top comment was of course the woman screams. the second comment is women try not to scream challenge, level impossible. i had to go back and watch the video again. there is, somewhat fainty, a little gasp emitted off-camera, more of a yelp than a scream. it is mostly lost in the crack of the explosion. afterwards, you hear her voice, shaken, say, are you okay?

i am helping one of my friends train her voice pitch lower, because she wants to be taken seriously at work. she and i do each other's nails and talk about gender roles; and how - due to our appearance - neither of us have ever been able to be "hysterical" in public. we both appear young and sweet and feminine. she is cisgender, and cannot use her natural voice in her profession because people keep saying she appears to be "vapid". we both try to figure out if our purposeful voice lowering is technically sexist. is it promoting something when you are a victim to it?

a storm almost sends a pole through a car window. in the dashcam, you can hear the woman passenger say her partner's name twice, crying out in alarm. she sounds terrified. in the comments, she is lambasted for her lack of calm. how is that even fucking helping?

in high school, i taught myself to have a lower voice. i had been recorded when i was genuinely (and righteously) upset; and i hated how my voice sounded on the phone speakers when it was played back. i was defending my mom, and my voice cracked with emotion. it meant i was no longer winning the argument: i was just shrieking about it.

girls meet each other after a long summer and let out a little joyful scream. this usually stops around 12-14, because people will not tolerate this display of affection (as it has the effect of being passingly annoying). something about the fact that little girls can't ever even be annoying. we are trained to examine each part of our lives (even joy) for anything that could make us upsetting and disgusting. they act like teenage girls are breaking into houses and shrieking you awake at 3 in the morning. speaking as a public school educator: trust me, it's not that bad, you can just roll your eyes and move on. it does not compare to the ways boys end up being annoying: slurs in graffiti, purposefully mocking your body, following you after you said no. you know, just boy things.

there's another video of a man who is not allowed to yell in the house, so he snaps his fingers when he's excited about soccer. the comments are full of angry men, talking about how their brother is unfairly caged. let him express himself and this is terrible to do to someone. eventually the couple has to address it in a second video: they are married with a newborn baby. he was trying not to wake the infant up. there is no comment on the fact women are not allowed to yell indoors. or the fact that it could have been really alarming or triggering for his wife. sometimes i wonder if straight men even like women, if they even enjoy being in relationships with them.

for the longest time, i hated roller coasters because it always felt inappropriate and uncomfortable for me to scream. one of my friends called me on it, said it was unusual i'm so unwilling. i had to go to my therapist about it. i don't like to scream because i was not raised in a safe situation, and raising my voice would have brought unsafe attention towards me. even when i am supposed to scream, it feels shameful, guilty. i was not treated kindly, so i lack a basic form of self-protection. this is not a natural response. it is not good that in a situation of high adrenaline - i shut up about it.

something very bad is happening, i think. in between all the beauty standards and the stuff i've already discussed - this one feels new and cruel in a way i can't quite express. yes, it's scary and silencing. but there's something about how direct it is - that so many men agree with the sentiment that women should never yell, even in an emergency - it feels different.

is the word shriek gendered automatically? how about shrill or screech? in self defense class, one of the first things they tell you is to yell, as loud and as shrilly as you can. they say it will feel rude. most women will not do this. you need to practice overcoming the social pressure and just scream.

most women do not cry out, even when it's bad. we do not report it. we walk faster. we do not make a scene. what would be the point of doing anything else? no matter what we do, we don't get taken seriously. it is a joke to them. an instagram caption punchline. we have to present ourselves as silent, beautiful, captivating - "valuable."

a woman is outside watching her kids when someone throws a firecracker at them. she screams and runs towards her children. in the comments, grown men flock together in the thousands: god. women are so annoying.

#warm up #writeblr #this one has bothered me for a bit #any time a woman does something even passingly annoying we treat it like a fucking crime #hey man. women are allowed to be annoying. everyone forever is allowed to be passingly annoying #as long as they aren't hurting anyone/thing #like u wanna know something? i find it super annoying that men don't wear seatbelts #why arent there thousands of comments on driving videos thats just like : men try not to die in a car crash challenge #''this briefly annoyed me''. okay??????? AND????????????????? go get ur self a cookie and calm down about it #ur not entitled to control other ppl's experiences and emotions just so u can maintain ur own peace #if being briefly annoyed ruins ur whole day! you! need! therapy!!!! #men try not to become immediately angry about nothing challenge: level impossible #ps author is nonbinary. we didn't even get into the gender presentation thing #the fact men think it's SEXY that my voice is on the lower end....

[hemipenal-system]

taking the moment to archive my entire blog tonight! trans people i recommend y'all do too. you know. just in case.

#photomatt fuckery #love being a trans woman on the “queerest site on the internet” that can't even handle a sfw transition timeline #if there's one post of mine that y'all should blow up btw it's this one #trans woman #transgender #trans #transfem #transgirl #queer #tumblr #tumblr staff

[thatdykepunkslut]

Taylors wift is just elon musk for horse girls and gays who are afraid of faggots

#punkblogging #if any of y'all call me a fucking misogynist for this #I literally almost exclusively listen to women fronted bands it's not because she's a woman #I even listen to pop sometimes!!! (I mean not radio pop but still) #she is just fucking lame as a human being and she's an awful songwriter and an industry plant in the exact same ways as musk #I could say this about most men in the music industry as well but no one is out here fucking worshipping... idek I literally #do not know enough men fronted bands to put together an example

[wis-art]

lesbian, trans and proud

ko-fi

#lucy #wiki #lesbian #trans #my art #queer #lgbt #hi #art #i felt like drawing lesbians #kissing #and being fat #i love lesbians #both of the characters are trans #i love women #and i love being a woman

[csuitebitches]

Traits I’ve Noticed in Confident People 

Disciplined - if a target is set, it is achieved 

Speaking - Can speak multiple languages. Can express thoughts clearly even if vocabulary is limited. The listener understands their point. 

Strong extroversion socially - can approach and talk to new people with ease, but also make them feel comfortable. Good at following up, asking questions and inserting little stories about themselves without exposing too much 

Strong general knowledge / industry knowledge. They know what they’re talking about 

Hard to please but not arrogant about it. They won’t readily accept a fact or opinion, even if the majority agrees - they’ll debate with it, think over it, play the devil’s advocate

Good posture

Strong set of principles and self control. There’s no shame in wanting to say, help someone, choose not to drink socially, buy a coffee for a poor person on the street; they don’t hesitate to do good deeds 

Hygienic. Clean, groomed, well dressed, well maintained. 

Observant and proactive at the same time. Can pick up on body language relatively easily - can sense discomfort or unease in someone and do something about it. 

Have a strong sense of self identity. Can be opinionated but open to challenges. 

#c suite #powerful woman #strong women #ceo aesthetic #personal growth #that girl #productivity #getting your life together #balance #Confidence #confident traits #how to be confident #How to be yourself #being social #socialising #stand out #glow up

[pandadrake]

Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021) Post-Credits Scene (Colorized)

Been wanting to draw a thing including that cursed MCU Peter photo for a while.

Tumblr ate the image in my last post so here it is again.

#I can't stop laughing at the cartoon man being pissed off at literal human being Tom Holland #miguel was building meter on that “beefing with teenagers" thing for about a year #my art #across the spiderverse #miguel o'hara #atsv fanart #atsv miguel #spider man #spider man 2099 #atsv #spider man no way home #no way home #spider woman #jessica drew #atsv jessica #peter b parker #atsv peter b parker #spiderman #marvel cinematic universe #mcu spider man #a spell that affects ‘everyone who knows peter parker is spider man’ is a problem if that description applies to 100% of your members #Miguel really regretting everyone in the society being on a first name basis

[i-just-like-commenting]

Text: decoupling pregnancy from femininity means accurate and more inclusive language and treatment, but it also allows cis women to refuse motherhood without refusing womanhood, which is great for feminism and terrifying for misogyny.

--THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS. As a sterile cis woman who doesn’t want to have children anyway I feel this is every ounce of my being. “Define woman” types tend to do so in a way that excludes me too, so I got to stand with my trans sisters.

#trans rights #inclusive language #pregnancy capability =/= woman #i know as a 38-year old I mess up on trans stuff and i am okay with being told when i do #but know that it's a mess up not me hating you i am way past that

[plutonicbees]

I've been totally fixated on the fact that gwen stays with hobie when she's not on spider-team missions so here's some fun notes

gwen says that hobie lets her crash in his universe- not "house" or "place" or "apartment", because hobie is homeless

she wears his chucks (how is she fitting into his shoes?) which is funny because hobie's original spider-punk costume included him wearing chucks, but in the movie he only wears boots

in the comics, the gwen stacy of earth-138 was, in hobie's words, "the greatest artist of [their] generation" who died a punk-rock legend, and hobie was/is a big fan of hers. gwen thinks his universe is cool and thinks it's extra cool that she's famous there, so his universe is probably something of a comfort place for her

gwen is apparently in his band (possibly his friend group which he calls the spider-band despite the fact that they're not actually a band and the others are not spideys), though gwen once rejected hobie's proposal of making an album together because his singing voice is awful (still, this was after they saved the world by playing punk rock together)

also, it's interesting to read "coming out as a superhero" as a queer allegory and it works in this situation as it parallels queer kids being kicked out of their homophobic homes and staying with friends in the aftermath

anyways. support the gwen and hobie besties agenda <3

#i'm so obsessed with them #still advocating for hobie brown being more of a loser in the next movie #he was only cool in front of miles but he's a loser (affectionate) fr #hobie brown #spider punk #gwen stacy #spider woman #spider gwen #ghost spider #marvel comics #marvel #into the spider verse #across the spiderverse #atsv #itsv #sony spiderverse #spiderverse #atsv spoilers #across the spider verse spoilers #spider man #btw thank u to sam for exchanging atsv thoughts w me :>

[jakeperalta]

the taylor swift ai porn issue is such a bleak reminder of how inescapable the horrors of misogyny are. like obviously there's the talk of sort of "celebrity problems" like treatment by the tabloids etc, but beyond that there's just the constant heinous shit that women seemingly cannot escape no matter what. it doesn't matter that she (as well as other female celebrities) is extremely rich and famous and successful and has basically as much privilege and power as it is possible for any person to have, ultimately that's still not enough to escape the revenge porn and sexual assault and stalking and harassment. like there is literally no level of power a woman can have that puts her out of reach of all the men who hate women and want to control and humiliate and subjugate us in any way they can.

#with the obvious addition that if you do not hold these privileges of being rich/white/able bodied/straight/cis etc etc then it's even worse #(which is why even someone who hates taylor with their entire being should still root for her in situations like this. #because if someone with all of her power and resources and privilege can't fight something like this then what kind of hope is there for #any other random woman or girl who faces the same thing.) #talking

[writeitinsharpie]

i have a thought about pjo that i can't quite articulate but it goes along the lines of:

athena gave annabeth as a gift to frederick because she liked his search for knowledge. in athena's eyes, any action of annabeth's reflects herself, which is why annabeth 'embarrassing' her had such strong consequences

poseidon fell in love with impertinent, stubborn sally jackson. percy wasn't a gift to her - he is a cumulation of all of her stubborn, steadfast love.

why wouldn't poseidon still love and aid percy when all of percy's insolence is why he loved sally in the first place?

#percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #sharpie says shit #pjo series #pjo tv show #annabeth chase #poseidon #athena #sally jackson #frederick chase #idk if i said it right #but basically #athena sees her children as boons she has given to the world #poseidon sees percy as a reflection of the woman he loved enough to break a vow for #annabeth sassing the gods is an embarrassment #percy sassing the gods is him being the Son of Sally Jackson #idk i just have a lot of feelings

[captainjonnitkessler]

Things I wish women were learning from true crime podcasts: how to spot early warning signs of abusive relationships, how to escape abusive relationships, how easily domestic violence can escalate to murder, how incredibly unlikely it is to be the victim of a crime done by a complete random stranger as opposed to friends and family

What women are learning from true crime podcasts: I am in CONSTANT danger and every day I survive without being murdered by a serial killer is a miracle. I should react to everyone I meet with distrust and paranoia and live my life as if I am in mortal peril and if anyone suggests that might not be healthy then they just don't understand what it is to Be A Woman In Today's Society

#I'm about to get heavily downvoted on reddit lmao #for suggesting that it is in fact irrational to look under your car every time you approach it #bc you think someone might be lying under it waiting to slash your ankles #like cmon. that was an old urban legend when i read it on snopes 20 years ago #anyway i can't stand the like. culture of fear among certain women #and the way it's presented as being an inherent part of womanhood that EVERY woman performs

[inkskinned]

okay if you're really cool about things, i can be honest with you. before you read further, decide if you're a girl's girl. if you're cool and actually cool or like not cool.

men don't talk in my book because i was fuckken tired of the way they're the center of every fucking story. i was tired of how every story takes a moment to let them talk. men can shut up for literally one fucking book.

unfortunately not everyone is cool. professionally what i usually say is i didn't want to add violence to the world. the only men in my book are abusers, so they don't get to talk. they don't get to take up space. they ruined my life, they don't get to have their words echo anymore.

because like, yeah! you find practically any story about a person surviving trauma and... there's a man at the center. men are often rescuing us from these things. a "good man" is always standing around, being a good man, proving to the victim that good men are the real men. that her experience was unique rather than universal.

the redacted text has not been taken well by all of my early readers. there is this weird, crouching growl that keeps occurring with men-of-a-certain-age. why don't we hear his side of the story?

when i sat down to write everything that happened to me, i couldn't look at the frank brutality of my abuser's words on a page and think to myself: i actually let him speak like that. i had to redact his words from the manuscript. i then left it redacted. no victim is going to read this book and hear the person who hurt them. it is a book for the victims to speak. abusers shut up challenge, forever. for eternity.

my father once told me, chuckling, i should just have a page of redaction where i let the man just finally talk. it is funny to joke about how we should make a whole page in my book about a man that hurt me. this was not the only time someone commented - it feels like you're hiding things. how do i know you're actually a victim if he doesn't get to speak?

there are books where women aren't even present. i even genuinely like some of those books. like, who doesn't like the hobbit?

i keep running into people defending this imaginary man. the default narrative is so true to some people that they will defend any man, just by virtue of the assumption - "if he's acting like that, you had to push him." certain people need definitive proof that you didn't accidentally make your partner into an abuser. they need to decide if you deserved it, because they want to be able to judge you.

which makes sense, i guess, from a hind brain perspective. if you can figure out "why" someone was cruel, you can protect yourself against it. if you defend the bully, the bully might side with you. i don't really know their explanation for feeling this about a character in a book. trust me, i wrote the guy. he is not going to protect you.

i guess i just - there was a time in my life where i desperately wanted anyone to defend me. where i could have really used someone saying holy shit are you okay instead of what did you say to make him act like that to you.

instead, over dinner, a friend-of-a-friend i just met is pouring herself wine. i heard you wrote a book, she says. she gives me the kind of chilly smile i associate with knives. i heard it's unfair to men.

#the author is nonbinary. don't get fucking weird. #btw if ur a woman and u do this u go to advanced special hell. like if u defend ab*sers at all #u dont get to pretend ur protected from being misogynistic. ur not. we all have internal work. #writeblr #i can't write lately wtf

[mountainmagpie]

Every friend group should include:

#I left out some categories because of possible spoilers #as of season 1 #this could age poorly with season 2 #but that is fine as long as we get a season 2 #and listen #I love Akemi #the thin ice is her sanity #I thought about her being the meaner lesbian #but that woman knows what she likes and she gets it #Ringo is the best of them #blue eye samurai netflix #mizu blue eye samurai #blue eye samurai #mizu #ringo blue eye samurai #blue eye samurai taigen #Akemi blue eye samurai #Akemi #Ringo #taigen