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#ben solo

Cover images by Lilithsaur!

Fandom: Star Wars Sequel Triology

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Graphic Depictions of Violence

Relationships: Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren

Characters: Rey, Ben Solo | Kylo Ren

Tags: Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Fix-It, Post-Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, non-EU compliant, I’ve taken story elements from EVERYWHERE (Tumblr included) to make this story work, Eventual smut WITH feelings, All tags from here on out are spoilers, Ben Solo lives!, Sort of…, Minor Poe Dameron/Finn, Misunderstandings, MacGuffins, Lightsaber Battles, Angst and Feels, Eventual Happy Ending, Secret Sith machinations, Redeemed Ben Solo

Chapter 5

In a vast, dank cavern hidden deep beneath the surface of a long forgotten moon, the scattered remaining voices of the Sith bickered relentlessly. Their arguments cutting in and out, their holos flickering, so far out was the moon, so deep was the cavern. Only one figure paced the floor, their dark robes swirling the mist as they turned and turned.

This was what the mighty Sith were reduced to, petty power grabs and inane infighting. No wonder they hadn’t been able to reach the Master, no wonder she had been able to throw them aside, weak as they were.

The sight of them now was pathetic. A handful of distrustful figures, huddled in the shadows. No longer the unseen puppeteers, they were but a paltry imitation, pulling at unattached strings.

Four holos in total. Each was obscured, their locations and voices altered for fear of discovery or betrayal.

The Republic offered substantial rewards for any information on or capture of the Sith. They even offered amnesty to any Sith who gave themselves over. A few of their number had taken it up. Others were killed before they could do so.


And yet despite all their setbacks, the losses and the trechery, they still gathered because there was yet one string attached.

The heir of Palpatine.

Chapter 1 🌗 Chapter 2 🌗 Chapter 3 🌗 Chapter 4 🌗 Chapter 5

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I see us in black and white

The bookstore was hot and humid. Ben saw a sign in the store window saying that their air conditioning was broken, but he didn’t mind. He was used to the heat.

Ben knew exactly what book he was looking for and headed straight back to the Classics section that the store highlighted. He had frequented this store since he was a young child and could definitely walk through the shelves blindfolded and find what he needed.

Ben saw the book that he needed as he turned the corner around a bookshelf. What he did not expect, however, was the small woman who was grabbing for that exact book.

I wrote a Reylo one-shot based on Black and White by Niall Horan! Check it out here.

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Post TROS idea….Rey, Finn and Poe travel the galaxy doing this and that. Whenever they come across something Sith that tempts Rey to the dark side Kylo Ren shows up. The boys the first time freak out because Rey had said he was dead but they can see him clearly. Rey on the other hand can feel in the force that it isn’t Ben, it’s a figment as the bond doesn’t breathe into her at all. She fights the figment off easily each time feeling stronger in the force each time. She grows confident in being balanced as it gives her knowledge of the dark side but gives her strength against falling to the temptation.

Sometimes they come across an old Jedi temple and that is when Rey breaks down as Ben shows instead. She can’t fight him and breaks in tears whenever this version shows up. The boys have to drag her away and each time she prays that the bond will sing again but as time goes on her Hope lessons and she begins to wonder where her bondmate is because he hasn’t lived up to his final words.

Finally years later when they are at neither a Sith or Jedi location when Rey is at her home shopping for groceries when she sees him. Working his way through the crowd. Finn and Poe are not with her for once and she’s worried she’s started hallucinating him but she feels him for once. Like he’s really there and then suddenly he’s right in front of her, his eyes showing more than she’s ever seen before.

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Also it’s just like ? he wears all black 👁👄👁 u r my man.

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I swear to god I don’t even get that DRUNK but when I start thinking of Ben Solo my brain goes “lmao drunkness increasing” and I’m like hold the heckity heck UP! 🆙 it’s like I literally get more loopy because I’m like this man really walks around in the Star Wars universe with lips like that HOLD ON that’s not allowed Karen that’s not allowed and then I’m like,,,, well you know what? I deserve it.kiss me u fool those LIPS honey

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We set so much criteria for redemptions and I’ve seen arguments that Ben’s redemption was only “middling” because he wasn’t redeemed sooner, etc., but I think this negates the fact that Ben’s been being redeemed since TFA. His redemption was not complete till mid-TROS, but he’s been stepping back into the light since the encounter with Han on the bridge. It’s slow and painful and laborious and step by step undoing each shadow and struggling toward the light because he wants to do good, he wants to love people (he’s literally in love with a girl whose name means light). From the very moment of his worst sin he’s catapulted onto the path of redemption because even as he kills Han, he experiences grace. Han touches his hand to his son’s cheek and it’s an “I love you” and “I forgive you” all in one, and Ben doesn’t get to live thinking he just IS this way and it’s inevitable and he couldn’t have made another choice. He has to live with the knowledge that even now he can come home and do good if he wants to. Even now he really can go back to the light. Han Solo saves his son by letting him do the worst possible thing to him and showing him no. Even now I love you and you can go home.

Ben is being harried by redemption. He’s running from it because it makes him hope and that hurts, because no one ever made him believe it really IS possible. (Even Luke Skywalker himself thought he was too far gone.) Killing Han is his way of getting rid of his own hope. But Han won’t let it work that way.

So we get a Ben who is a wreck. Because his hope that he can go back is also knowledge that he has a choice to make. And step by little baby step he starts to make it, even while he remains stuck in his belief that he never can join the good (because Han forgave him, but Ben has to accept that forgiveness.) He follows Snoke’s orders (but he has compassion on the girl, and tries to give her something she needs—help with her power). He attacks the Resistance ship (but he cannot commit the same sin again, the sin every fiber of him regrets; he refuses to fire on his mother). The girl hates him, because yes, he is a monster (but he knows what it’s like to be in her position, scared and alone with no one to help, so he tries to help her anyways, and when she comes to him scared and broken he sits, and listens, and cries, and tells her (his enemy), “you’re not alone.”)

Every bit of this, every gesture he makes in love, every right choice in place of a wrong one, is a small repentance, an inch closer to the light. Yes, I am a monster. (But I will do right. I will love. I will help.) (Yes I am a monster, but I don’t want to be.) 

And with every act he grows more human. He loses his mask. He’s uncovered. He’s got tears in his eyes. He’s a person and his name is Ben. Rey carries on Han’s task—bring him home. But he does need help.

Because here’s the thing: we are always saying such and such a character has to “redeem themselves” But that’s not how it works. We don’t redeem ourselves. We always need help. And Ben is taking those steps; he wants it; but he hasn’t been shown fully that it’s possible. So he doesn’t believe he can get out yet. He’s stuck in his despair. He needs Leia and Rey (the light) to tell him they want him back. He needs to let himself fully believe what Han showed him. He apologizes, even if that could never cover what he means when he finally chokes out “Dad.” And Han assures him, I know. I know you love me. I know you regret all this every day. You’re my son. Now go do what you do best—love, hope, light the way. 

All Ben needed to know was he was loved and that changed everything. 

(We love because He first loved us). 

Ben’s mortal sin was despair. But he stepped step by step back into the light and finally got out of the dark by choosing to hope and accept forgiveness. He regained his humanity because of it. He loved. There is no further way he could have been redeemed. 

We do not ever “deserve” redemption—that’s the point of getting redeemed. It means you’ve done something to not deserve stuff. We do not redeem ourselves—we must know we are loved in order to love. We do not redeem ourselves by making up for our sins (we can’t pay back all we owe (that’s why we have the cross), but we are sorry and repent and do penance; we do what we can to restore the good and sin no more.) Ben was fully and beautifully and realistically redeemed, and his arc spanned 3 movies of learning to be human again. He was being redeemed all along. 

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We don’t talk about this scene enough, he has so much anger inside of him in this scene, you can see him literally trembling. But aside from anger, he has so much sadness that Adam Driver portrays so fucking beautifully. At this point in the movie, he’s killed his father already, and now he just killed Snoke, his master, that has been with him inside his head ever since he was just a little kid, who he went to right after Luke tried to kill him, who manipulated him into thinking that he wasn’t strong enough but showed enough kindness to Kylo that made him stay and give everything over to the dark side. And it was all for Rey, he killed his master to protect Rey, who then left him after he offered her the entire galaxy. And to fucking ADD to that pain, he’s holding his fathers (iconic) dice in his hands, you can tell he feels regret. And in this specific scene, the force has connected him to her again for the last time in this movie, they’re looking at each other and he can’t do or say anything other than stare. And ALSO in that second gif is him telling Rey Luke Skywalker was dead. They both felt it in the force and he knew how much he meant to her, with all of this going on HE STILL tries to comfort her, he looks so SINCERE too. God what a fucking actor.

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