The Deep End
Summary: A character study of Actor and his mindset shortly before Who Killed Markiplier
Warnings: suicide, suicidal ideation, drowning
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The actor stepped out of the manor's back door and onto the patio. He squinted in the afternoon sunlight, grimacing as he blocked it out with a hand. He looked back into the doorway before rolling his eyes and walking towards the pool.
Benjamin had suggested he get some sun. It would be autumn soon, he said, he should enjoy the warm weather while it lasts. He was pretty sure Ben was just trying to get him out of the house long enough to clean the mess he made last night - he turned out the contents of three cabinets and desk looking for a bottle of bourbon he swore he left in the study.
Mark didn't usually let his butler tell him what to do, but he decided to humor him just this once.
He stood at the edge of the pool, simply staring down at the tranquil water. It was beautiful, the way the summer sun reflected off the mosiac at the bottom of the pool. He wasn't dressed for it, wearing only a robe and pajama pants, but he was considering going for a swim. It'd been a long time since he'd gone swimming.
It'd been a long time since he'd done anything he used to enjoy.
Painful memories flooded his mind, but just as quickly came an idea. He'd felt the sting of a knife before, many, many times. He'd tasted bitter poison mixed with his wine. He'd thrown himself from the stairs twice, once with a rope tied around his neck. But he'd never drowned before, and he certainly hadn't tried dying outside of the house. Would he even come back if he died out here?
Would it even matter if he didn't?
Either way, it would be an interesting experiment. He wasn't sure when those previous attempts became experiments, but he could ponder the difference later.
His mind was made up now.
He jumped into the deep end. In a moment, he was submerged in cold water, his robe pooling around him. He simply floated there savoring the feeling of weightlessness, until his body began to spasm.
He forced it to be still. This was always the hardest part. The body's first instinct is to save itself, to swim to the surface and cough out the water filling its lungs. Such a human response, for something like him.
He stayed under until his lungs burned, and his vision turned black.
When he opened his eyes again, everything was still black. No, not black. Nothing. An endless expanse of nothingness. He was familiar with this. This was the place he returned to every time he died.
He still felt cold and weightless. He held up his hands, now lined with a deep crimson light. He tilted his head and smirked, speaking to himself in a voice that seemed to echo for miles. "Fascinating."
He suddenly felt a tug at his back. A wave of fear rushed through him. Although he felt at home in this place, more than he ever had in the manor, he was still fearful of what lurked in the dark. Yet another human instinct he needed to force out.
He turned around slowly, but saw nothing. He relaxed, but then came another tug, and he was pulled from the darkness.
He suddenly fell onto hard stone and began involuntarily hacking up water. Sensation returned to him all at once. He shivered in the cold air, soaking wet fabric clinging uncomfortably to his legs. His eyes stung from chemicals and bright sunlight. He blinked the water from his eyes and looked up at the figure standing over him.
It was the groundskeeper, that old man who'd tended to the property since he was a child. He just stood there, Mark's robe balled up in one hand. He looked down at him with pity in his eyes.
Mark took a shuddering breath before snatching the robe from his hand. "Don't you have some roses to be pruning somewhere?" he spat, shooing him off with his free hand. He awkwardly held the soaked robe over his chest, hoping the groundskeeper hadn't noticed his countless, damning scars.
The old man didn't say anything in response. He simply turned and walked off. Mark could see him shaking his head.
He scowled, forcing himself to his shaky feet and storming back into the house. He was too angry to consider what he learned from his experiement. He needed a drink.
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My cousin works for apple, so she A) refused to let me keep my android when I moved in and B) helped me get an Ipad + Procreate from the goodness of her heart. And now my art's already like 75% better than when I just had a wacom pad and GIMP
And then Tyler reposted that stream and I got inspireeeed
I want to do Benjamin justice in my next fan game, I already have plans for how he'll be involved in the first case. I'll mostly be posting art like this on my Ko-fi (which should be FREE to look at) but I can't not post this one here, I'm just too hyped
Happy WKM anniversary ^_^
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