Round 1, Side A: Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney (2001) vs Pokémon Black & White (2010)
Ace Attorney | Pokémon
Campaigns under the cut!
Campaign for Ace Attorney:
listen to maya's reminiscence theme and tell me you dont feel something. ace attorney sweep!!!!
Campaign for Pokémon:
Altered my brain chemistry permanently, the fact that the soundtrack changes between seasons?? And its interactive, with the two areas that have npcs that if you talk to they'll add a part to the music (village bridge and accumula town), and when you're running it adds a drum, and its dramatic beats hit SO hard with the sweeping orchestral music
Probably the best soundtrack of the entire franchise.
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A time for the previously-announced Anime Expo showing of the Pokemon Concierge series from Netflix!
There's a limited figure from Korea of the Pokemon having a pool party.
The full art for the Pokemon 151 Alakazam card by Mitsuhiro Arita.
And the first episode of Black and White has been added to the playlist of Japanese episodes. (It's mostly been just first episodes, so I guess we'll see the first episodes for XY, Sun and Moon, and maybe Journeys too?)
Tyranitar and Salamence Nanoblocks releasing in September.
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God.
I wish Pokemon Black and White 2 were as good as people act like they are.
Those games are not anywhere near as good as they're perceived to be, and it makes me kind of mad. And really, really sad. I wish I could have that opinion too. But I can't.
The gameplay is quite possibly the epitome of "It was probably good if you played it when it was current and lived in a big city where there could reasonably be a solid community who played it as well but there's nothing of substance there if you don't meet those specific criteria", which is. Impressive, considering that that exact phenomenon is the biggest problem with every single game in the franchise, but that's not all.
It gets heralded as one of the best stories in the franchise, which, for Black and White, I can totally see and wholeheartedly agree with. But Black and White 2? ...Really? The games with next to no actual story, that barely include the three (Four but the protagonist doesn't count because silent Pokemon protagonist) main characters of the story, and cut out arguably the most compelling Gym Leader (Lenora, the museum curator who is SINGLEHANDEDLY THE REASON THE ENTIRE CONFLICT OF BLACK AND WHITE COULD BE RESOLVED BECAUSE OF HER HISTORY KNOWLEDGE)? Those games are the best in the series, and are better than Black and White. That's the hill you're dying on. I don't know why you decided to die trying to defend a pit, but okay.
I could do a whole essay on this- and I probably will someday, since if I'm being totally honest, it's really only a matter of time before I start making video essays about my dumb opinions on video game stories that no one agrees with, but for now... this really just depresses me.
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Time to roast Pokemon Gen 5
I was really looking forward to playing Pokemon Black / White (Gen V) because everyone said it was the Pokemon gen with the best story.
Well.
The plot:
Evil Guy wants to take over the region.
Evil Guy is like "Hee hee I will trick people into releasing their Pokemon, then I'll easily take over with MY Pokemon."
Evil Guy tells everyone that keeping Pokemon in pokeballs is exploitative. He frames this in generic terms (no examples) and this is enough to make the crowd gawp and wonder aloud if Evil Guy is correct. They seem shocked by the idea the Pokemon could be exploited, to which I say . . . do these people ever watch the news? Like we have had four previous games full of pocket monster exploitation by bad guys. Anyway, Evil Guy urges everyone to release their Pokemon.
Evil Guy of course has an Evil Team. And since the Unova region is based on America, of course they are themed as . . . MEDIEVAL KNIGHTS!
But don't worry, this team also has American theming such as Seven Sages, a couple ninjas, and a late game castle which erupts out of the earth.
It's all so generic. It's too bad, because America certainly has a history full of conflicts and villains. All right, there are some topics that I wouldn't trust Pokemon writers to address with enough sensitivity (like racism), but what about "Pinkertons versus unions"? Organized crime and crooked cops? The 1920s had a rash of fake spiritualists bilking people out of their money, what about a team based on them, with Psychic type Pokemon? With a Champion based on Harry Houdini, who loved unmasking fake psychics?
But no, we get store-brand Final Fantasy bullshit.
So anyway, Evil Guy's plan relies on people believing that he means well and is trustworthy. And therefore, Evil Team starts . . . committing a wide variety of crimes! In front of witnesses! They steal pokeballs from children, they kick Pokemon, etc.
"But maybe they still have plausible deniability," you might be thinking. "Maybe people won't believe kids." Well, maybe not, but they also commit crimes in front of Gym Leaders, the most trusted and powerful people in the Unova region. Like, one of the Gym Leaders has a museum, and instead of breaking in stealthily in the night, Team Evil just goes through the front door in broad daylight and steals an item while everyone stares at them.
Let's reflect on some other shortcomings of Evil Guy's plan which, to reiterate, is to guilt people into releasing their Pokemon.
First, if a Pokemon loves its owner, why would it leave just because it was released? Why wouldn't it continue to hang around, like the wild Rockruff that lived in Professor Kukui's house in the anime?
Second, if all Pokemon WOULD rather flee into the woods than stay with their human, then the bad guy is seemingly correct.
Third, what about the asshole trainers who don't care about their Pokemon's feelings? We know they're out there, there's a Pokemon move called Frustration.
Fourth, even if Evil Guy tricked everyone into releasing their Pokemon, there is nothing to stop the populace from catching NEW Pokemon the minute Evil Guy starts using his Pokemon to bully people. Feed Evil Guy's plan to a Trubbish and throw it in the bin, because it's garbage.
On a final note, when looking at the ethics of keeping Pokemon . . . Of COURSE it would be unethical to keep a lot of them irl! Giving children Fire type Pokemon would be grossly irresponsible. Litwick feeds off human souls, you shouldn't keep one. And the Yamask--introduced in THIS GAME--are described as "the spirits of people interred in graves. Each retains memories of its former life."
Now personally I love the weirder Pokedex entries and all the Pokemon with horrifying origins. I love that Pallosand shoots the bones of its victims from its arms and that Phantump is the ghost of a child who possessed a stump. However: Gen V made a beeline for the only rake in the yard and stepped on it. Most Pokemon games sidestep Poke-catching ethics; it's understood that this is all pretend, nothing is actually being captured, and therefore the player doesn't need to worry about such things.
But characters within Black & White bring this argument to the forefront, and without having any rebuttal. This is why the Evil Guy makes generic arguments like "If you don't release your Pokemon they can't fulfill their true potential", instead of telling the crowds "Catching a Yamask means you're enslaving a human ghost" or "Hands up anyone who caught your Pokemon by burning, paralyzing, or poisoning it."
So, yeah. Pokemon Black & White has the second worst story of a mainline Pokemon game. I haven't played Black 2 or White 2, maybe they were better.
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Round 1, Side B: Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney - Justice For All (2002) vs Pokémon Black 2 & White 2 (2012)
Ace Attorney | Pokémon
Campaigns under the cut!
Campaign for Ace Attorney:
honestly out of the main trilogy this one has the best themes ever. especially all the reminiscence themes. it sounds and feels like something you'd expect for the height of a trilogy. also justice for all is underrated as a game it'd be awesome if it won jk haha Unless.
Campaign for Pokémon:
it's got all the cool jammin music of black/white 1 but more, how could you not like it?? I especially love the virbank city gym soundtrack, do you know of any other pokemon soundtrack that's had voice as an instrument?? Yeah that's right, no you haven't!!! Don't fact check that just trust me bro
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I really like the concept of battle facilities, like the Battle Frontier etc, but I hate how you have to rely on competitive teams and a crap ton of luck to complete them.
Like I’d love it if we got post-game content like that but we could just use the Pokémon we’d beat the game with, like they’re so cool and yet the majority of people have never even seen most of them.
The only one that does that is the White Tree Hollow and the Black Tower from Black 2 and White 2, it was awesome and we even got a shiny Pokémon as a reward.
We desperately need more places like this.
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