#black widow x reader
vancityfire13 · 2 days ago
When You’re Not Around
Natasha Romanoff x Reader
Word Count: 1.1K
A/N: This definitely includes Smut/Sexy stuff, some voyeurism, but also has relationship moments with Reader and Natasha :)
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It wasn’t common for you and Natasha to have missions apart. It’s one of the reasons that your relationship worked so well.
There’d always been something exciting about finding privacy, secret moments of intimacy on group missions.
Once, Natasha had made you come in the back of a quinjet, hand slipping underneath the waistband of your underwear as her face stayed nonchalant. 
That was why you’d spent the last three days missing her as much as you had. The nights had felt too empty, her fingers didn’t wander lazily up and down your front in the morning. Her lips hadn’t touched your skin in too long.
You found yourself aching for her on the third evening. The kind of emptiness between your legs that couldn’t be ignored.
You flicked through pictures of her, the few that you had saved to your phone. 
You felt yourself grow wetter as flashbacks of nights together clouded your mind. 
You came with your own fingers, but it was almost enough. 
When the ache between your thighs finally lessened, the emptiness of your bed only felt heavier.
You wondered about Natasha. 
She’d been sending you silly texts all day. You read between the lines of each innocuous observation she sent you.
Natasha was bored and missing you too. 
As you lay there, with your fingers still inside of yourself, your phone buzzed in your hand.
Natasha’s random emoji made you feel closer to her than you could have felt possible. With confidence that you never normally had, you snapped a selfie of yourself. 
Your activity was obvious from the picture.
You sent the picture back, along with a heart emoji of your own.
Natasha sent back a single word.
You smiled secretly into the dark. 
Your eyes didn’t have a chance to close before the call to action was sent to you. 
Alert in an instant, you left the base shortly after.
Together with a small team you searched through a supposedly empty warehouse, that had been tipped off as the gang’s headquarters.
Evidence of the gang’s presence was everywhere, but they had clearly been tipped off too. 
Coulson dismissed you as a new team were called in, ready to sift through the remnants left behind and piece together what they could.
You’d lost track of time in the rush of everything,  you hadn’t expected to arrive back home so quickly.
You checked the time as you unlocked the door to your house. It had only been a matter of hours since you’d last texted Natasha.
It was 3am.
You didn’t expect any lights to be on.
Instead, the whole house was bright and you entered unsurely as you tried to guess where Natasha might be.
You heard her from the hallway.
Your head swivelled to the bedroom door, slightly ajar. 
You smirked, knowing exactly what she was doing behind it. You’d caught Natasha wanking a handful of times before.
You pushed the door open slowly. Any nerves of being caught were freed by past experience. 
You knew Natasha liked being watched. 
She was sitting in the middle of the bed, legs loosely crossed. Her hair was loose, wavy in a way that meant it had just been released from intricate braids. 
You recognised it as a sign of her earlier boredom. 
Phone in one hand, Natasha’s other hand was between her legs.
She was in her bra, panties pushed to the side to make room for her fingers.
Your breath caught, and you froze in the doorway. Heat built between your thighs.
Natasha’s eyes began to close as she started mumbling to herself. 
You watch her grind against her own palm.
She placed the phone on the bed covers, as she reached to massage her breast absentmindedly, half in a haze from the building pleasure.
You watched the muscles in her legs tense as she stretched them out slowly. 
Every part of you wanted to join her, but you forced yourself to stay still. Natasha was right on the verge of coming.
You’d make her come again, you promised yourself, arms folding as you settled in to watch the best part of the show.
Natasha started moaning now. 
Her eyes reopened hazily, and you realised that she was trying to focus on her phone screen again.
You barely suppressed your own satisfied smile, you remembered exactly the angle of those photos.
Abruptly, you felt attractive in a way you’d never felt before. 
Natasha wanted you this much. 
At last, Natasha came, hard and fast.
Her fingers stayed pressed against her pussy.
Her moan cut out midway, replaced with a whimper.
You gave her a moment to catch her breath, before you took a step forward.
Natasha startled immediately at your presence.
The flush on her cheeks from the orgasm became more pronounced.
Your heart thudded with the beauty of her, lips parted in surprise.
You cleared your throat, knowing it would be raspier from your attraction. 
Someone else spoke first. 
‘God, you’re so fucking hot.’ 
The voice was tinny, it sounded small in the room. It took a moment for you to pinpoint it. For the realisation to kick you like a blow to the chest.
You stared at Natasha’s phone, now laying on the bed sheets.
Something compelled you to take another step forward, and another.
Natasha tried to snatch the phone back.
You still saw the video call.
Another woman, half naked on the screen. You caught her blurry look of confusion as Natasha hurried to end the call.
The silence that followed was the worst moment of your life.
‘Y/N.’ Natasha whispered and you heard the nervous apology in her tone. There was no other explanation, it was exactly as it seemed.
You tried to blink back tears, your hands pressed to your stomach, wondering if you were even still standing there. 
If she’d really been doing this.
‘Y/N/’ Natasha mumbled again, and she started crawling toward you on the bed.
She touched your arm and you flinched automatically.
Looking at her filled you with an uncontrolled pain. But, you couldn’t look away.
You loved her. You’d been loving her.
Tears started falling. This was over. It had never been real.
You felt stupid, as if Natasha had been laughing at you this whole time and you’d only just realised.
You’d trusted her so much.
‘Please.’ Natasha said suddenly, her own arms wrapping tightly around her chest. 
Her mouth was slightly open as the tears ran silently down her cheeks.
Her voice was too soft. As if she’d been afraid of this moment and it had finally arrived.
You rubbed at your eyes harshly, wishing you could stop crying for just a moment.
‘I thought you liked me.’ You whispered, voice breaking.
Even when you’d given her everything, Natasha didn’t want you.
Next Part
@whofan88 @lostandsearching @causeitswhatjesuswouldfreakingdo
@xxromanoffxx @b-5by5 @peggycarter-steverogers @iblameitonclint @natasha-danvers @reminiscingtonight @magicallymaximoff @mindofwesley @blackxwidowsxwife @wandaromanova @wandavixen @peabrain112 @theperfectlovestory @wellsayhelloaagin​ @owloftheshadows​ @wickedmuses​ @strangegardentaco​ @hallecarey1​ @marvels-writings​ @alexzz13​ @ic-4u​ @007giu​ @natashabelovas​ @iliketozoneout​ @chasethemoon​ @p0orbaby​ @tastetherambeau​ @rightwereyouleftme​ @wouldirunofftheworldsomeday​
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xrqkayo · 2 days ago
Natasha x reader request
They’re having an argument and Natasha is pestering R and R is just like “Shut the f-” but catches themselves and quickly changes it to “Please stop talking” but Natasha hears it anyway
Do what you will with the rest
Ends in fluff pls cause my heart cannot handle emotional damage rn
Cruel Words
Pairing: Natasha x gn!Reader
Warnings: Angst, mentions of smoking, mention of dying, mention of lung cancer.
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"Y/n, what were you doing this morning?" Natasha had been pestering all morning about where you were and it was starting to annoy you.
"Nothing, Natasha!" That was a complete lie. You had gone outside to have a smoke and had accidentally spent too much time out there. Natasha was already awake when you came back to the room which made you panic because Natasha had been very firm with the fact she didn't want you to smoke, and you currently reeked of marijuana.
"Oh, bullshit. I'll ask you this one more time, what were you doing this morning?"
You let out a groan and flopped on your bed. "I was doing nothing!"
"You are such a liar!" You could see Natasha was fighting raising her voice at you.
You knew that Natasha knew you smoked but she wanted you to admit it.
"I'm not a liar, Natasha!"
Natasha scoffed and crossed her arms, "You swore you wouldn't smoke after Bruce told you any more smoking could cause you lung cancer."
"It was one smoke, Natasha!" You admitted, raising your voice slightly.
"One smoke could kill you!"
"Can you just shut the fu-" You stopped yourself quickly, "Can you please stop talking? You're stressing me out." You didn't mean to swear at her, it just came out in the moment because she was stressing you out.
Natasha was silent for a moment.
"Excuse me?"
Dammit, she heard you. You looked over at Natasha with apologetic eyes, "I'm sorry, Natty. It just slipped out, I didn't mean to be that aggressive."
Natasha glared at you, "You do not get to swear at me after I try to look after your health!"
You sat up in the bed and looked at Natasha. "I'm seriously sorry, Natasha, you know I wouldn't swear aggressively at you on purpose."
"Y/n, I am so, so fucking scared that you're going to die because of smoking and you keep doing it!" Natasha raised her voice, clearly upset that you swore at her.
"It's hard stopping, Nat," You kept your voice neutral, not wanting to raise it after you swore at her.
"I know that! Do you not remember that I smoked? Do you not remember I was the one that gave you your first smoke, and now you're hooked and could die because of me? Do you not understand how guilty I feel?" Natasha was yelling at this point and she didn't even realise because she was so caught up in her own rage.
You absolutely hated it when Natasha yelled at you. It made you feel like shit.
"Natasha, you know you shouldn't blame yourself. I chose to keep smoking, that's on me."
"And now I'm begging you to stop, Y/n. I don't want to lose you, I can't lose you." Natasha fought back tears as she spoke. Just the thought of you dying scared her.
You noticed her tears and stood up from the bed, "Hey, you're not going to lose me, okay?" You cupped her cheek and brushed away a tear that managed to escape her eyes.
Natasha shook her head as she leaned into your touch. "I'm going to lose you if you keep smoking," She whispered softly, locking eyes with you "Please stop smoking, please."
You looked away from her and bit your lip. Quitting from smoking would be hard.
Natasha softly grabbed a hold of your face, making you look back at her. "Please just try, Y/n."
You sighed softly. Natasha is right, if you do continue smoking there is the possibility you could die and you don't want to die, not while you're dating the girl of your dreams.
"Okay, I'll try to stop." You whispered out.
Immediately, Natasha hugged you and let out a choke sobbed. "Thank you, y/n, thank you." Natasha was overwhelmed with happiness.
Natasha pulled back from the hug and put her serious face back on. "But swear at me again and it won't end well for you."
You nodded, "It won't happen again."
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plxviofiles · 2 days ago
I think I'm falling for you.
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↳ pairing: natasha romanoff x fem!reader
WARNINGS: bad writing 💀, alcohol? I think that's it, if there's anything else, lmk :)
➫ Natasha never imagined that she would find love, especially with a random girl who screamed bloody murder at 3 am when she was the one that fell onto her in the first place.
⤳ A/N: happy dying on the inside 1,003 days without Natasha :) I'm a little late since I just found out, but she is my favourite person in the world and she means so much to me <3 this fic in particular is for all the natasha lovers, there's never not a time when I wish that our best girl would just come back :(
Italics are flashbacks ! this fic is also based on this song. it'd probably be nicer to read and would make more sense if you listen to it at the same time <3
⬐ word count: 2.9K (it was like 9 words away from being 3k this is not satisfying to me at all)
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RESTLESSNESS whirled inside Natasha as she treaded back to her home after a little walk to clear her mind.
For some reason, somehow, she thought about soulmates. Love. Falling for someone. Natasha's thoughts didn't usually consist of this. Uncertaininty was pouring onto her like heavy rain.
What if she didn't find some of that life that Wanda always told her to get? What if she doesn't have the capability to fall for someone? What if that someone didn't fall for her?
Little did she know that she would meet that someone that night, and what she didn't know either, was that she was your someone as well.
You backed out of an alleyway slowly, keeping alert of your surroundings, but at the same time, already zoning out. I have the attention span of a fly, you thought.
The redhead doesn't notice you either, and fate decided to have a little fun with its two favorite victims.
"Shit!" Natasha swore when she felt someone fall directly on top of her after bumping into them. You only felt someone very...solid underneath you, and caution flooded into you.
"I'm sorry," you apologised anyway, groaning, and opening your eyes. They met green, not an ugly green, no, but the most ethereal green you've ever seen. Emerald green. Natasha's heartbeat quickened just by maintaining eye contact with you. Are you the someone I'm looking for? A fleeting thought passed by her.
Natasha's heartbeat quickened just by maintaining eye contact with you. Are you the someone I'm looking for? A fleeting thought passed by her.
"STRANGER DANGER!" you suddenly exclaimed, scaring the shit out of Natasha, and you jumped off of her, brushed yourself off, and held up your arms in defense.
"Woah, woah," Natasha stood up, her hands in front of her, keeping you at arm's length, "Calm down. I'm not going to hurt you."
"That's exactly what someone who's planning to hurt me would say," you deadpanned, your arms still held protectively in front of you.
Natasha finally noticed where she was, right in front of the Stark mansion. The richest people where she lived.
"What were you doing, coming out of this alleyway all sneaky like?" Natasha asked suspiciously, eyes narrowing.
"Depends, are you the police?" you joked, which was bad timing, because Natasha stiffened and looked like she was one second away from punching you.
"Now I'm the stranger danger, hm?" you said, grinning, "Y/n Stark, pleased to make your acquaintance," you bowed jokingly.
"S-Stark?" Natasha found herself rendered speechless, "The Tony Stark has a daughter?"
"There's a lot of things you don't know about my father," you shrugged playfully, "But I guess that's a topic for another day. Let's focus on getting you home safely, shall we?"
"There's no need," the words slipped out of Natasha's mouth, "I can take care of myself."
"Well, I am aware of that, trust me," you spoke softly, and the moonlight illuminating your features just reminded Natasha of how beautiful she thought you were, "But the thing is, you don't always have to."
"Nat, Natasha, Natalia! NatNatNatNatNat."
Natasha shook her head, ultimately breaking out of her trance, and her vision cleared when she saw your face right in front of hers. A blush spreaded throughtout her cheeks.
"Thank God you're back to me," you sighed, relieved, "I thought I lost you for a second there during my rant on why people who put milk before the cereal deserve to be in jail."
"I put milk before the cereal," Natasha's eyebrows furrowed, and you gasped, "I knew you couldn't be trusted from the moment I met you! Truly horrifying, aren't you?"
Natasha rolled her eyes at your antics that she grew to find endearing, and she caught herself staring at you again.
Snug in the old library, your bright and buoyant aura was what deeply contrasted you to your surroundings, you looked to her like someone that came out of a comic book, animated, flawless, and sporting a knockout smile.
"I still can't believe you made us drive out to this ancient library that doesn't even have computers to search for the books we want instead of just using the one on campus," Natasha grumbled, trying to come off as upset.
You didn't take the bait, instead you clapped your hands happily, "Come on, Nat, you out of all people know I love exploring! This library is so cool."
Natasha could see how happy you were, the library's so senescent and simple that she could feel herself gravitating toward every aged book, nook, and corner.
"Wait, why me out of all people?" Natasha asked suddenly, and you raised a brow.
"Is that even a question, Romanoff?" you replied, smiling kindly. The confusion on Natasha's face was evident.
"You're my best friend, no one else comes close," you said easily, then as if you said nothing at all, resuming your hunt of the book you sought to find.
Natasha nodded slowly and exhaled quietly.
Would she ever be more?
Would you ever be more to her?
"You know, you would be the type to escape parties for fresh air," you grinned at your friend.
It was about 6 months after you first met. You were incredibly well acquainted already. You briefly remember accidentally registering Natasha as your emergency contact one time. It was an accident, you think.
"Especially when it's one of your father's parties," Natasha breathed, out, "The whole city is here."
It was true. Tony threw the most extravagant parties. The room was full of people, your age and older, drinking champagne, playing party games, and it was full of chatter. As much as you considered yourself a social butterfly, even you needed time to just get away. Especially since it was New Year's Eve.
"Damn right they are," you confirmed, lifting the glass to your lips, "So, any new year's resolutions?"
"You believe in those?" Natasha snorted, the indifferent expression on her face turning into a smile, only because you were there, "Of course, you would be the type to believe in those."
"I didn't say I believed in them," you huffed indignantly, "I was just asking!"
Natasha shook her head with a smile, "Maybe...I have one."
"Are you going to make me beg for it?" you were standing right next to her now, and Natasha turned her face to meet yours.
It felt like she was breathing again, the first breath after rising out of the water that fills your lungs so desperately that you can't help but take another breath.
"Maybe," is all Natasha whispered. Natasha's lips look cold, you mused.
"Please?" you tried, with those puppy eyes she felt resembled her dog too much.
She swallowed, her throat felt tight.
"To have someone to kiss on New Year's Eve."
You stared at her, before bursting into laughter. Natasha was sure that even fireworks couldn't compare to your radiance. Soon, she joined in the laughter as well.
"Stop lying to me, Nat!" you giggled, "That's the most cliche thing I've ever heard you say! You hate cliche! You don't really believe in New Year's resolutions too, don't you?"
"God, you're slow," she teased, and you rolled your eyes, downing the rest of your champagne and sighing.
You could hear the countdown for one minute from inside the room.
"I wouldn't mind having someone to kiss on New Year's Eve, too," you mumbled, face still in your glass.
"Yeah?" Natasha leaned forward a little to try to catch the expression on your face.
30 seconds.
"Yeah," you whispered, looking into her eyes. You never felt more free than when you were with Natasha. Silence ensued. You're not sure how much you were paying attention to everything else. Natasha was enticing, entrancing, Natasha was magical.
10 seconds.
"Kiss me," you ordered gently, hands finding their way onto her neck.
"Are you sure?" she asked once more, hesitant.
You answered that connecting your lips with hers.
Natasha's lips tasted of soda, and you grinned at the thought of her refusing to drink even though you told her that you both could spend the night at your dad's, because she was your ride.
Addicting. The only word to describe you. The only word to describe her.
It was at the time that you knew you were falling in love.
There was a time where Natasha swore you felt the same way, but now she wasn't sure anymore.
After the kiss, you just laughed and winked at her, before hastily running back into the house, and thanking your father for the party.
Natasha just stood there, dumbfounded at how the kiss made her feel, and her heart constricted at your casualness. But what was she expecting really? A confession of love?
Maybe you'll change your mind.
Natasha slaps herself internally, and she focused on finding her own book. These intrusive thoughts could wait.
"You coming, Romanoff? Or are you too busy admiring my beauty?"
"I'm right behind you, weirdo."
"I told you I can do the dishes," you argued, playfully bumping into Natasha who was next to you and helping.
"Why are you so insistent? You never pass up a chance to make chores easier," Natasha teased, and you scoffed, placing a clean plate on the side, "Come on, dishes is like, the only chore I can do without getting distracted 5 seconds in."
"Good that you know," Natasha grumbled, and you splash water at her, "HEY!"
"Stop playing around and do what you're supposed to do," you mimiced the girl's words that she often said to you some days, and she glared at you.
"Out of all the things I say, that's the only thing you remember," Natasha chuckled, and you grinned.
"You practically live here," you said without thinking, "You sleep over almost everyday, you do chores, we spend literally the whole day together except when you're working."
Natasha stopped washing the cup she was holding, "Is that a problem?"
You looked at her, and she seemed almost worried, as if afraid of being too clingy. Genuinely, Natasha was the only reason you still had motivation. Having her next to you for most of the day, energised you.
"Of course, it's not," you quickly reassured her, "It's nice having you around all the time. You know I love spending time with you."
Natasha relaxed and continued, "This might sound random, but...any girl would be lucky to have you, y/n."
But I want you, you thought to yourself, remaining quiet.
Don't you see me?
I think I'm falling.
I'm falling for you.
Never in your life, would you have ever thought that you would see Natasha Romanoff dancing. She was graceful, poised, everything in between, each movement was calculated, but at the same time, smooth.
You had shown her the ballet room in your own mansion, that you had built but didn't really use.
You watched in awe and in silence.
"Going to keep staring, or are you going to join me?"
"I barely know how to dance, Nat," you said, not surprised that she knew you were there. She always seemed to have a sixth sense when it came to that.
"I'll guide you," she held out her hand. You slunk off the wall and walked towards her, eventually taking her hand.
"What about a waltz?" she asked, and you grinned, "You dance, uh, stuff other than ballet?"
"Probably anything you can think of," Natasha shrugged nonchalantly, "Like how tech was your thing as a kid and even now? That's me with dancing."
"That's amazing," you said, impressed, "You're full of surprises."
"It's one of my many, many talents," Natasha chortled.
And just like that, with Natasha's voice in your ears, one hand on your waist, and another intertwined with one of your hands, you weren't aware of how smoothly you were dancing.
"Huh," you giggled, when Natasha showed you how well you were doing, "You do make everything easier."
"Know that I feel the same way about you," she pulled you closer.
Her touch felt like fire all of a sudden. Losing yourself in her was easy.
You longed to feel her lips on yours again.
The words slipped out before you could stop yourself.
"Kiss me."
Unless the last time, Natasha didn't hesitate and wasted no time and quickly kissed you. Lips moved in tandem, and you felt lighter than before.
Natasha made everything easier. Even loving.
"Why are you all alone in your room and crying to Taylor Swift?"
Natasha's voice rung through the air and you didn't dare answer, a blanket wrapped around your figure. It was a month before you showed her the ballet room. You looked at her, she didn't look any better, disheveled hair, and a black eye.
You sat up slowly, sniffling, and pat the space on the bed next to you. Natasha reluctantly trotted over and made herself comfortable on the bed. You lay down, and so did she.
"What happened?" both asked at the same time.
You gave each other knowing looks and laughed.
"Okay, I guess we aren't ready to tell each other anything," you said softly, and Natasha nodded in agreement.
Then you just laid there, facing each other, smiles finally growing over time. Sometimes it was enough just to be near one another.
You draped part of your blanket over her, and she snuggled closer to you.
"For what it's worth, I hope the person who hurt you stubbed their toe," you spoke up.
"I hope that the person who made you cry gets soggy socks tomorrow," her lips tugged upward.
"I hope their pillow is warm on both sides."
"I hope their hot coffee gets mysteriously cold when received."
Natasha laughed at that and you stared at her fondly.
Neither knew what the other was thinking, but they were thinking the same thing.
Are you all I need?
"Remind me where we're going again?"
She scoffed in disbelief, "Do you not understand what a surprise is, Stark?"
"I know this place inside out," you confidently stated, "I wouldn't be surprised no matter where you take me."
"Oh yeah?" Natasha's smirk was more attractive than any model you've ever seen, "Wanna bet on it?"
You forced your gaze away from her and huffed, "No."
"Then shut up and enjoy the ride," Natasha joked, accelerating.
"Could you be any more careful? I'm too pretty to die," you shouted, holding onto the grab handle.
"Believe me, I know."
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"Watch your step!"
"Hard to watch my step w- OW. When I'm b- SHIT. Blindfolded! You suck as a guide."
"Aw, how sweet of you to say."
You grumbled under your breath as you stepped on a bunch of random twigs. Natasha led you to an open area where the wind soared to its greatest lengths.
“Open your eyes,” Natasha whispered into your ear, taking her hands away, and when you opened them, a gasp left your mouth.
A beautiful view of the entire city, and, contradicting what you had said earlier, a place you’ve never seen before.
“It’s breathtaking.”
Natasha’s slight smile was directed at you.
“It is.”
“I gotta hand it to you, Nat,” your hand tangled in your hair, face still awestruck, “You really know how to show a girl a good time.”
Natasha laughed deeply, “And you said you knew this city like the back of your hand.”
“I always learn something new when I’m around you.”
Natasha bit her lip, before sitting on a bench parallel to another and patting the seat in front of her, “Do you fancy sitting here, with me, maybe?”
You chuckled and followed her lead, “Of course.”
There was barely any sounds except for the both of you, and the creatures of the night, the small area free from the noises of traffic and people.
“Can I say something before I chicken out?” you suddenly asked, fingers tapping on your knees and eyes drawn to the ground. Natasha nodded slowly, a slight fear rising inside her at what your next words might contain.
“According to your heart,” you whispered, “My place is not deliberate.”
Natasha’s heartbeat was obnoxiously loud at this point, and it took everything in her to not just sprint out of there, away from you.
“I don’t want to be your friend anymore,” your voice was muffled, cheeks heavily blushing, “It’s not enough. I want more.”
Natasha’s rendered speechless again. It was the moment she was waiting for, but why was it so hard for her to speak?
You cautiously inched closer to her, placing a hand on hers. Natasha shuddered, your touch had that effect on her.
“You just…looked so alive, during the fireworks,” you smiled at her, “The lights just enhanced everything that was already enchanting about you.”
Natasha’s hand curled into yours, squeezing it tightly at your words. Tears pricked at the corner of her eyes subtly. This didn’t feel real.
“On this night, in this light,” you referenced the night you fell in love with her, New Year's Eve, “I think I’m falling. I’m falling for you.”
“Will your ever change your mind?” Natasha spoke, her voice strained.
“No,” you added, gaze softening, “I’m in love with you, my best friend, and I think I’ll always be.”
Natasha lunged forward then, throwing caution to the wind, and catching your lips with her cold ones. Her arms wrapped around your neck, and your hands snaked around her waist. She tasted like strawberries.
She broke apart, nose bumping against yours, before breathing out,
“You’re all I need.”
“On this night, in this light,” she repeated, eliciting a small laugh from you.
“I know I’ve fallen for you," you finished, your eyes crinkled with how hard you were grinning.
“I’ve fallen for you too,” Natasha said, eyes sparkling.
"What does this mean for us?" you asked, hands intertwined with hers.
"We'll take it one day at a time," Natasha reassured, "Just promise you'll be mine?"
You lifted her hand to your lips and kissed it gently,
"I promise."
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httpjupiterbby · 2 days ago
If possible could you do a mob boss Natasha Romanoff x wife reader where reader and Natasha have been trying for a child for a while and when reader finally becomes pregnant Natasha and Reader get into a small Argument about the safety of their unborn son or daughter when a assassin tries to harm reader
maybe in another lifetime || n.r
masterlist || navigation || taglist
No one has permission to repost my work anywhere, if you see it please let me know. ®
pairings: mob boss!natasha romanoff x wife!reader
warnings:18+ angst, slight smut, slight dirty talk, daddy kink, cussing, gun violence, arguments, death, murder, fighting, bombing attack *let me know if i missed any*
word count: 4613
part two
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You and Natasha have been trying for a baby for a few months using the IVF treatment but those have been unsuccessful, you would get pregnant then after a few weeks you would have a miscarriage. Your first miscarriage was the hardest, you were further along, three and half months to be exact. It took a toll on you and Natasha, she would stay out late ruining her 'business' while you stayed home and grieved the baby you were excited for. It was rough couple of months but it soon calmed down after one big fight in particular. Now you guys were trying the treatment one last time, if this one didn't work, you were gonna hold off on the treatment before trying again.
You and Natasha both sat in the exam room, you laid on on the bed, you legs up as the Doctor stood between them, injecting you. Natasha sitting down on you side, holding you hand. The doctor stand up, taking off their gloves, "Alright. all done. Now you just have to take it easy, keep taking your treatment medication and in 14 days, you'll come back, get some blood drawn and we shall see if you're pregnant or not" She tells you, cleaning up her tray. You put you legs down and sat up, "Thank you, dr. Lewis"
"Of course, i'll see you both soon" She says, smiling at you both before walking out. Natasha gets up, grabbing your hand to help you down the table. You take off the gown and start get dressed. "How are you feeling?" Natasha asked you, you finish up putting your shoes on then look at her, "Good, I'm really hoping it goes through this time"
"I'm sure it will, baby" Natasha smiles at you, "I have a good feeling about this one plus third times the charm, right?"
"You mean fourth times the charm" You laughed, Natasha shrugs, "The third one doesn't really count"
"Yeah, that's true" You nod, remembering when the doctor called saying the treatment didn't process well.
"C'mon, lovie, let's go home" Natasha grab your purse with one, grabbing your hand with the other and walks out meeting Bucky and Steve who stood outside guarding the door.
Steve starts walking in front of us while Bucky walks behind us, we walk to the back of the clinic as it was safer than going through the front, walking out the back door you see Tony standing there by the truck, he opens the door and Natasha goes in first than you and Steve, making sure you were safe in the middle.
"Go" Natasha tells the driver, doing as told, Tony starts driving back to your shared home. Natasha throws her arm around your shoulder, pulling you in her side, you look at her and smile, reaching up to hold her hand, "I can't wait to be home and get into bed"
"Good, the doctor said you need sleep and to rest in bed" Natasha says, you smirk at her, "Who said anything about sleeping" you wiggle your eyebrows and giggle.
Natasha gives you a sly smile, "Behave. The doctor also said no special activities for 48 hours"
"Well the doctor sucks" You roll your eyes, she doesn't really but you finally had Natasha home for 24 hours and you weren't able to have fun with her, sighing, you push your naughty thoughts away, looking up at her and smile, "I love you, bubs"
"I love you too, sweet girl" Natasha leans down and kisses you, you hum at the feeling, her phone than began ringing making you pull apart. "Sorry, baby" Natasha say, pecking your lips again before pulling out her phone and answering it, "Speak."
The car comes to a stop, Tony puts it in park, getting out and opening the back door. Natasha gets out, holding out her hand for you to take, you smile taking it as you get out. Bucky quickly get to the front door opening it for you both, Natasha still on the phone. You see Natasha walking to the kitchen and follow her. She leans against the counter, talking to whoever was on the phone, you smirk lightly seeing the outline of her strap, she likes to wear it causally, says it makes her feel powerful, you just think it's an easier way fuck you anywhere, and she always wears your favorite; double sided, you liked that she got pleasure out of it too, thick and eight inches for you, her side six inches and thin.
You caught her eye and give her an innocent smile, walking to her, you stop in front of her and get down on your knees unzipping her pants as you stare up at her.
Natasha watches you, eyes dark and full of lust, "Yeah, give me a second ,will you" she tells the person on the phone, pulling it away from her ear and pressing it against her shoulder, "Baby, doctor said no fun"
Smirking up at her, you pull her pants, "Doctor said no fun about filling up my pussy, she didn't say anything about my mouth. Now " You pull her boxer briefs down, the fake cock popping up in front of your face, you practically moan at the sight, your hand wrapping around it, "relax, take care of your phone call and let me have my fun, daddy"
14 days later..
It was officially 14 days since your last treatment, which means it was time to go to the Doctor's and cheek if it worked. You were going alone as you had told Natasha, your appointment was the next day. You wanted to surprise her and also not get her hopes up again.
You got up from the stool, taking your plate to the sink and lay it in there. Natasha follows behind you, doing the same. "What's your plan for today, baby?" She asked you.
You clear your throat, as you began to wash the dishes, "Um I was gonna take Bucky with me to get some groceries, maybe stop at the farmers market"
"That sounds nice" She says, unplugging her phone from the charger, "Hey, can you get me some of those lemon bars. Ugh those were so good"
You nod, rinsing the plate, "Yeah, baby"
"Cool" The mob boss walks up behind you, pressing a kiss on your cheek, "I gotta go, I'll see you later, okay?"
You turned your head to look at her and smile, "Okay, I love you"
Natasha smiles back, "I love you, my baby" She presses her lips against you, humming at the feeling of your lips, she than pulls away sadly, giving you one last peck and a small 'goodbye' before leaving.
You hurried and finished the dishes before heading upstairs to her dresses. Once dressed, you heard Bucky shout at you that he was there and quickly go downstairs, running to the front door. You sprint to the car and get in, you were a little late as you weren't expecting for Natasha to have a long breakfast. The driver speeds carefully to the clinic, parking in the back of it. Bucky gets out, letting you go in first. The doctor was already waiting for you inside. You told Bucky to stay out as you would be fine alone when ask if you wanted him to go in there with you.
You take a seat on the bed and nervously wait for the Doctor to check. Right now, she was checking your blood pressure and heart rate, a normal check up. She grabs a cart with a computer on it, dragging it by your bed, "Okay, I'm gonna need to you lay down and lift up your shirt"
You did as told, laying down and lifting up your shirt underneath your boobs. The doctor sets up her computer, grabbing a bottle hovering it over your stomach, "This is gonna be a little cold" She says, squirting the jelly on your stomach making you jump a little. She puts it down before grabbing a scanner thing, placing it on the jelly and moving it around your stomach putting light pressure on it.
It was silent for a couple of minutes making you worried as she continued to search around in your stomach. It wasn't until you saw her break out into a smile that calmed you down, She presses a few bottoms before urging the screen to you, "Congratulations, mama"
You smiles brightly as tears began to fall, staring at the screen, you see a little blob, it was your baby. The doctor takes of scan off of you, handing you a napkin to wipe the gel off of you before handing you the ultrasound photo. You take it with one hand as the other cleaned off the gel. You then sat up pulling you shirt down as you continued to stare in awe at the photo.
"Remember, take all your vitamins that you need. Take it easy" Doctor Lewis, tell you, "Now all that matters is making it after the safe line" She says.
You wipe your tears, eyes pulling away from the photo and nod, "Okay, thank you, Dr." You gave her a small smile. She smiles back giving a nod, "Of course, you can call tomorrow to start your monthly check ups" She says grabbing her clipboard, "Have a good day and congratulations again" She says before walking out.
You smile brightly, getting off the table and walking out. You couldn't wait to tell Natasha. Bucky sees the photo and smiles at you, "Congrats"
"Thank you" You grin, "C'mon, I wanna tell Natty" You say and start walking to the back door, Bucky right next to you. He opens the door for you, letting you go first before following behind you then opening the door to the tuck. You get in with him following behind, closing the door and telling the driver to go. You stare down at the ultrasound, completely in bliss looking at it.
You look up from the photo, see the truck was surrounded with people in mask, shooting at it. The windows were bulletproof so none of them were breaking. Everything was happening so fast. Bucky pushes you down on the seat, yelling in his ear com demanding for back up as the driver pulls out a gun, opening the door, Bucky shouts at him to keep it close but the driver didn't listen as he shot at the masked people before getting shot himself, he falls on the ground laying in his blood. Bucky shoots through the open door, getting a couple of guys. You had your eyes shut, your hands covering your ears as tears streamed down your face. All you wanted right now is your wife.
A few block away, Clint hears the demand, his face turning pale when he hears that Bucky was with you. Running, he goes to the room Natasha was having a meeting with the girls at, barging in, everyone looks at him as if he were crazy.
"Back up. They're getting shot at" Clint pants, Natasha stands up quickly, "Who?"
Her eyes widen, remembering that Bucky is with you today, not saying anything, Natasha runs out heading to her truck with Clint, Steve and Tony following behind her. They all quickly get in the truck, with Natasha behind the wheel and drive to your location.
The shooting then stop, Bucky still having his gun aimed at the open door. One of the masked person walks up to the door,
"Stay back!" Bucky shouts at them, beginning to shoot at the them as they continued walking to the car door, the bullets jumping off their chest as they wore a bulletproof vest. The reach by the door, they hand reaching for the button and unlocking the rest of the doors. The door next to Bucky opens and in a second he was knocked out by the mask person. You scream getting up from your seat and you pushed yourself up against the other door which soon opens almost causing you to fall out. You scream again, your chest moving up and down fast. The mask person raises their gun at you and you close your eyes waiting for the hit to happen.
"Tell Romanoff, this was her warning" The person behind the mask speaks causing you to open your eyes, the person unloads their gun, grabbing your arm making you whimper, they open up your palm and put the bullet in your hand before letting you go.
They walk back to the others then began running off. You sat there, shaking and whimper as you stare at the bullet in your hand. A black truck comes in, tries screeching as it comes to a stop. "Y/N!" Natasha yells for you as she gets off the car running to the truck. Clint and the two others ran to the truck, helping Bucky out as they saw him laying on the floor. You shakily get out of the car and see your wife, you began walking to her. Natasha stops in front of you, pulling you into her arms as you start to break down, "Shh, you're safe, baby. I got you" Her heart hurts seeing you like this. Whoever did this was gonna play for it.
"T-they killed Daniel" You whimper, Daniel was your driver, "And they hurt Bucky"
"Bucky will be fine, baby" She whispers to you, "They gave me this. They said this was a warning" You say and pull away to hand her the bullet. She takes it from your hand, examining it, she growls lightly knowing exactly who's bullet it was.
"C'mon, baby. Let's get you home" She kisses the top of your head, pulling you with her to the other truck. She guides you in and sit next to you, spotting a paper in your hand, "What's that, baby?"
"It was supposed to be a surprise" You whimper, clinging to her side as you hand her the photo. She takes it from you, examining it and smiles sadly, "Baby" She kisses your head, "Best surprise ever and I'm sorry it wasn't the way you wanted it to go"
You stay quiet, clinging to her tightly as you buried your face in her chest, all you wanted was to be home, safe in Natasha arms. "I'm so glad nothing happened to the both of you" Natasha whispers, placing her hand on your stomach. Me too, you say internally.
Tony comes, opening the driver seat and peaking over. Natasha shakes her head, not wanting to talking about it right now, "Take us home please" She says. He nods, giving a quick shout to Clint to take the other truck then getting in and heading to your shared home. "Is Bucky okay?" You asked Tony.
"Yes, he just woke up before we left. He'll be fine" He tells you, making you relax at his words. You smiles slightly feeling Natasha rub your stomach. You hated those guys for scaring the shit out of you and not letting you have your day, but all that mattered right is that you and little bean are safe.
Natasha stayed with you for the rest of the day, not wanting to leave you side ever, you couldn't even go to the bathroom alone. Though she did leave you alone for ten minutes to talk to the boys but that was about it. It got you thinking about what you thought the other day, is this the lifestyle you want to give your baby? and the answer after the shooting was no. You don't want your baby to have this lifestyle, having to always look over their shoulder or have a guard with them 24/7 because their mama's enemies might be after them. You didn't want that, especially knowing that your baby could possibly be killed, you trust Natasha's guys but they can't protect you three forever, they are getting old, some will probably leave wanting to start their own little family and than what? Have to learn to trust the new guards, not knowing if they're just a fake and is actually working with the enemy. Yeah, no. That's not what you want.
You glanced at Natasha as she finishes washing her hand, while you were cutting the vegetables for dinner, "So i've been thinking.."
"Yes?" Natasha looks at you, drying her hands with a towel.
"I think you should leave the business" You say, looking down as you continue to cut vegetables.
"What?" Natasha looks at you confused, " Why?"
You sighed, answering her "Because we're about to have a baby Nat, what do you mean 'why'?"
"What does having a baby have to do with my business?" Natasha asked making you fume with anger,
"What do they have to do with it?" You stop cutting, putting the knife down and looking at her, "Everything. I'm not gonna raise a baby i'm this lifestyle, Natalia. I don't want our kid to miss out on having a normal childhood"
"Baby, they will have a normal childhood just with measures" She tells you, trying to calm you down.
"Our child is not going to be safe. You have a lot of enemies" You point out, you couldn't believe you were arguing about this, you thought she'd be okay with leaving the business due to the fact you were having a baby.
"Nothing will happen to them"
"Natalia, I got fucking shot at this morning!" You yelled at her, "What do you have to say about that huh? I will not have my child be a target just because you choose to live this life"
"Y/n, you knew the risk when you got with me" Natasha shakes her head at you, crossing her arms.
"I know but our child doesn't need to know that! I want them to be able to go to school!" You shout, turning back to the vegetables, you began to start cutting them again.
"They will."
"No, they won't! They'd have to be homeschooled and stay home until god knows when, having to take a guard with them everywhere they go because it's not safe for them!" You stressed, wishing she'll understand and stop being stubborn.
"Well they'll be safe at least!" She declares, throwing her hands up.
"Will they? Or will they always be a target because of you" You asked, glaring at her.
"Our child will be safe because we have the best guys with us and who cares about a normal life, we sure as hell didn't have one but at least they'd be living their best life than what we had" Natasha tells you, throwing both your childhoods in your face so you can understand why it's best to stay, "I'm not leaving the business and that's final"
"Fine" You slam the knife down and start walking away, "Cook your own damn food" You sneered, going straight to your shared room, crawling into bed and sobbing. Maybe in another lifetime, your child would get to live a normal life.
Natasha sighs, letting you go, there was not point in chasing after you if you both weren't gonna agree with each other. Leaning against the counter, she looks at the bullet one of Rumlow's guys had gave you, she continues staring at it before pushing herself off the counter and walking to the living room pulling out her phone to call Yelena, needing some sister advice.
The next day, Natasha left you a note saying she had an early meeting and she'll be out late today. Usually after your fights, she would work at her office half day before heading home, wanting to give you your morning to yourself while you both calmed down than later you would both apologize and cuddle all day, making up to each other. But today Natasha didn't get that choice and she hoped that you didn't think she was ignore you. By the time she was done with her meeting’s, it was already six o'clock and she still had some paper work to do.
A knock on the door makes her look away from her computer, saying a quick 'come in' before turning back to her computer.
"Hey, boss! Yelena sent you flowers" Clint walks in with a bouquet of flowers, yellow roses to be exact, Natasha looks away from her computer again, examining them,
"Thank you, Barton" She smiles at him, "Put them on the table" She points to the small table by the door, Clint nods and puts them on the table, "I didn't know you were taking any businesses today"
Natasha leans back in her chair, twirling her pen, her lips pursed, "I didn't"
"Oh" Clint frowns at her response, "Okay, well I let you get back to work boss" He says and walks out, shutting the door behind him.
Natasha stares at the flowers then looks away, rolling her shoulders as she gets back to work.
An hour later, Natasha shuts her computer down, putting all her paperwork away. She stands, grabbing her jacket, pushing in her chair before walking to the door. Stopping by the flowers, she lightly touches them, moving them around then leans down to smell them, pulling away she glances at them and smirks. Opening the door, she walks out and shuts the door then pulls out an extra phone she had in her desk, walking away from the door, she quickly punching in the numbers, it dials then stops when the person answer, "Yelena, I need your help"
Bucky puts the last of your luggage in the back of the truck, closing the trunk, he gets in the truck sitting next to you, "Natasha is not gonna let you leave" He tells you as the car start moving, going to Natasha's work before heading to the airport.
"She has a choice and if she makes the right then we wont have to worry about her not letting me leave" You tell him, staring out the window. He sighs and does the same. You weren't gonna wait for another lifetime to give your child a normal life, they were gonna get it now, with or without Natasha. As much as you love, you can't have your child be in danger. The car parks by the front door and you get out, not giving Bucky a chance to get off with you, you stalk your way through the halls to Natasha's office, opening the door you see her behind the desk, slamming the door shut, Natasha looks up from the sound, "Baby, what's wrong?"
You cross your arms, glaring at her, "I'm leaving, Natasha"
Natasha stands up from her chair, walking around her desk to you, "What?"
"I’m leaving. I called Yelena yesterday and I told her I would be on my way with or without you" You tell her, "I'm giving you a choice. Me or this job"
"Baby, I can't just leave this business. It's not like a regular job" She says, her head still trying to wrap around what you said.
"Well than I guess you pick your job" You say and turn around, about to walk out the door.
"Y/n, that's not fair! I started this business! I fought tooth and nail for all of this shit!" She shouts, frustrated, "You can't just expect me to leave it all behind"
"When it comes to the safety of your child and me? Yes, I expect you to fucking leave it!" You shout back at her, "I can't just leave it! What about the boys, huh? What are they supposed to do?" Natasha shakes her head at you.
"Leave too. Find a job, retire. They must have enough money to retire" You roll your eyes, "I'm tired of fighting about this, Natalia. It's me or this business"
"Y/n, this business was all I had before you! I'm proud of myself for making it the way that I did! You seriously can't have me give it up!"
"Natalia. I almost fucking died!" You point out, Natasha sighs, running her hand through her hair, "I-i cane just leave it, why can't I have both?"
"Because if you have both, you might only end up with one, one day" You tell her the truth, if one enemy wasn't afraid of trying to kill you, none of them will, and you might end of dead one day.
Natasha shakes her head, eyes closing at the thought, "It's not fair"
"Life isn't fair" You say, "Make a choice, Nat. I have a plane to catch"
"I can't" Natasha voice cracks, you stare at her in disbelief, "You wouldn't thought it would be so hard to choose between your business and your wife who is carrying your unborn child"
Natasha stays silent, eyes on the floor, you shake your head at her, scoffing, "Fuck this. I love you, Natasha but screw you. I'm leaving" You turned around, hand on the door knob, about to open it until Natasha shouts.
"Wait! Baby, please! please don't leave" Natasha hurries to you, grabbing your hand as she falls on her knees, face red from the tears, "Please, baby. Don't leave me, I'll leave this shit. I'll do anything! I'm sorry, please please don't leave me"
You turned around looking down at her, as she stares up at you with teary eyes, "Please, I'm sorry. I was stupid for even thinking about what to choose. Please, my love. Don't leave me, I need you. I need both of you"
Your heart breaks at the sight and from her words, never in a million years would you ever see your brave girl on her knees, crying and begging, "Okay, I'm not leaving you"
Natasha break into a smile, standing up quickly before pulling you into her arms, "Thank you, baby. Thank you"
"Yeah, yeah" You smile and kiss her cheek, wiping it after as well as her other cheek, "C'mon, we have to get going"
"Baby, can I please have a week or two" She says causing you to frown, "I promise, I'm leaving. I just need two weeks to get everything sorted than we can go wherever you want"
"Fine. Two weeks" You say sternly, "And that's it"
"Promise. Just Two weeks" She kisses your cheek, "Let me grab my things and we can go home, okay?" She pecks your lips, moving out of your arms to walk to her desk to grab her things.
Once she has what she needs, she walks back to you, opening the door, letting you go first before walking behind you, she grabs ahold of your hand as you both walk to the back door. Bucky opens the door for you both, letting you walk out as Steve holds the door to the truck open.
Natasha goes in first and you go in after her, Bucky going in last as Steve shuts the door, getting in the front.
"Go" Natasha says, wrapping an arm around your shoulder, pulling you into her side before giving your head a kiss as you rest against her, looking out the window.
The driver nods, sending a quick message before taking off. The black SUV drives down the road, making a sharp turn.
The SUV explodes, glass exploding everywhere as well as car parts as the fire breaks through the whole car.
Afar, another SUV was parked watching the truck burn, the person behind the wheel takes their phone, putting it up to their ear just as the ringing stopped.
"It's done" is all they say before hanging up, continuing to watch the truck burn, little explosive happening making parts of the car fall off.
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epiphany-of-a-madwoman · a day ago
Meet Me in the Afterglow | Natasha Romanoff
Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Reader
Genre: Angst with Fluff at the end
Words: ~3.3K
Summary: You loved surprises, but Nat never did.
Note: To the person that requested this, I hope you like it! Please, let me know if you guys have another request for me! :)
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“What’s been up with you lately?”
Natasha’s voice pulled you from your deep thoughts. You’d been mindlessly fiddling with the chain around your neck, nervously shifting in your spot in the chair. You looked up at her, a deer in headlights.
“What do you mean?” Your voice was quiet as you tried to keep the nervous insecurity that had been gnawing at you for months. Everything had to be perfect, or she wouldn’t say yes. That was what you’d convinced yourself, the mantra repeated enough it became burnt into your bones.
“You’ve been acting strange,” she said. Her emerald eyes narrowed at you, perfectly plucked brows furrowed. Her gaze was tense and sharp, trained eyes looking for weakness. She knew something was up, of course she knew something was up. She was a trained spy, skills that would aid her on the field drilled into her head from day one. Meanwhile, you were a mediocre liar on your best days, never able to directly look someone in the eyes and comfortably mislead them. Even if the intentions weren’t malicious.
“Have I?” Your voice cracked. Your face was overcome with a wince, eyes flickering to the wall beside Natasha. Your foot began to shake, tapping against the wood floor. Only a little longer, you only needed to keep this up for a little longer. Then you would propose and everything would be perfect.
“Yeah you have.” Her voice was lethal; sharp and mistrusting. She stood from her spot across the room, chair faintly squeaking from the shift of weight. Every footstep echoed in your head as she moved towards you. It felt like a death march as she moved to you ready to strike.
“I wouldn’t know why.” A laugh left your lips, nervous and scared. You didn’t know where this conversation was heading, but you wanted it to end before it fully started.
‘Just a little longer.’
“I think you do,” Natasha said. Her words were a warning, offering you a chance to fess up to whatever you were up to. You looked at her, eyes maintaining a wide-eyed look. Your mouth was parted slightly, mind scrambling for something to say. But it was empty.
You simply shook your head, unable to properly form words. Natasha sighed, disappointment glazing over her eyes. They used to be full of so much warmth and love, but now they felt razor sharp. And you couldn’t remember when the switch had happened. Had you been so oblivious, wrapped up in your planning you didn’t notice her pulling away.
Your heart raced, anxiety tightly wrapped around your throat. You could feel it in the air, she was getting ready for a fight. That was the absolute last thing you’d ever wanted. But it seemed unavoidable, unless you showed your hand and ruined all those months of secret planning.
“I’m not stupid, Y/N,” Natasha said, rolling her eyes. She was growing more frustrated with each noncommittal answer. You poorly dodged her question, adding more fuel to her fire.
“I never said you were,” was your quiet reply. Natasha scoffed and you swallowed the lump in your throat.
“Then stop treating me like it. You’ve been weird these last months; secretive,” she said.
You leaned forward and opened your mouth, ready to defend yourself, but nothing came out. A strangled sigh was all that came out. And you leaned back into your chair, preparing for whatever was next.
“Whenever I call, you’re always busy and when I ask you what you’re doing, you never answer. You disappear at weird hours of the day and never have an explanation. And now you won’t even look me in the eye,” Natasha said.
You said nothing, opting to stare at the ground. There was a sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach. The anxiety gripped you tighter, nearly suffocating. Fingers drummed on the arm of the chair, hopeful this would all end soon.
“I’m sorry,” you finally muttered after a long pause. Natasha scoffed and turned away, moving to the other end of the room.
“Is there someone else?” The question was like a thousand tiny cuts. Your eyes shot to her form, mouth agape as you stared at her in disbelief. Did she really think so little of you, that she thought that was what was happening? She thought you were cheating.
“No! How could you even think that?” You stood from the chair, taking a step towards her. Face painted with horror, you looked directly at her, desperate for her to see the truth in your eyes.
She just shook her head.
“How could I not!?” she replied, the volume of her voice raising. It wasn’t quite a yell, yet it wasn’t the soft tone she used to always use. This felt cold and distant. She was pulling away, putting a million walls in between you and her.
“Well, I’m not! I love you Nat, I’d never do that,” you said, voice matching her volume, but more frantic. You needed her to understand that infidelity wasn’t the case here. And it never would be.
“Then fucking act like it!” she yelled. It startled you, causing you to jump back. Her face was venomous, eyes narrowed and deadly. She was tired, irritated by the dance you’d been unintentionally leading the past few months.
“I-- I’m trying!” you exclaimed. Tears started to form in your eyes, and you willed them away. Now wasn’t the time to cry.
“Bullshit. What’s been up with you lately?” she fired back with no hesitation. You took a deep breath, shutting your eyes for a moment before opening them again.
“I can’t-- I can’t tell you right now,” you said, stuttering over the words. She sighed in annoyance and rolled her eyes. “But it’s not-- it’s not that. I love you Nat, I really really do, you have to believe me.”
“Don’t say that.”
“Don’t say what?” you asked, brows furrowed in confusion.
“Don’t fucking say you love me,” she said.
“It’s true though,” you whispered. She laughed; cold and angry. It sent chills down your spine. This was a side of Natasha you’d never been exposed to. It was crippling in the worst ways.
“No, it’s manipulative. It's a way for you to try and keep me around,” she said.
You frantically shook your head and took another step forward. Natasha took one back, maintaining the distance that laid between you two.
“That’s not it at all,” you said. “And I swear, this’ll all make sense soon, just please trust me.”
She rolled her eyes once more, arms crossed over her chest as she blocked you off.
“You keep saying that as if it will magically fix everything,” she said.
“Natasha, baby, please, would you just listen--”
“I’m done hearing excuses. Either tell me the truth or get out.”
You shut your mouth and stared at her, crestfallen.
“I’m done.” Natasha shook her, and walked out of the room. “I don’t want to see you until you're ready to not lie to my face.”
Her footsteps slowly got quieter the further she walked. And then slam the bedroom door shut behind her.
You stood, frozen in place, not fully processing what had just occurred. You stared at the spot she stood in only moments ago unblinking. Slowly, you turned and looked down the hallway. For a few moments you waited, hoping she would come out of the room. Even if it was just to scowl at you.
Then you were walking, carefully opening the front door and closing it behind you. You left the apartment, walking aimlessly until you ended up in a coffee shop. You sat there. Untouched coffee in front of you. Staring off into space and hoping the ground would swallow you whole.
“Hello! I am here, entering your home!” Yelena called out, slowly entering the quiet apartment. After hearing no response she stepped all the way in, closing the door behind her. Eyes flitted across the space: empty. She furrowed her brows, eyes narrowed in concentration. It’d only been three hours since she texted you that she’d be here. Surely if you had left you would’ve let her know.
“I don’t want any accusations of breaking and entering. I announced myself,” Yelena muttered to herself. Her soft footsteps echoed as she walked further into the apartment.
“What are you doing here?” Natasha’s voice suddenly broke the silence. Yelena turned around, only mildly startled. Natasha’s eyes were narrowed, suspicion clouding her gaze. Her mouth was set in a firm, thin line, arms crossed over her chest. With rigid posture she was almost able to hide her mildly bloodshot eyes. But her cheeks were tearstained and nearly rubbed raw.
“I came to see Y/N,” Yelena said. Which was true. Yelena just conveniently left out the part where she was here to help you with the last minute proposal details.
At the answer, Natasha’s face tightened up, eyes narrowing into a sharp glare.
“I can’t believe this,” she muttered, gaze not moving from Yelena, who simply raised a brow in response. That was not the expected reaction.
“That Y/N has friends? Really, you should think higher of your girlfriend,” Yelena teased, a smirk sliding onto her face. Natasha remained unamused.
“Don’t play stupid. You know what you’re doing,” Natasha said, tone accusatory.
“Ohh kay, I feel as though I’m missing something here,” Yelena said, her tone uneasy. She looked around the apartment, hoping you would just pop up and explain what was happening. You never did. So Yelena held her hands up in defense and slowly stepped away from her sister.
“Oh?” Natasha tilted her head to the side. “Actually it was me who was missing something. You know, you were the last person I expected to do this to me,” Natasha said. With each step Yelena took back, Natasha took one forward. It was like they were doing a waltz, only with one of them completely oblivious to it.
“I’m flattered you think of me last when doing something. I just don’t know exactly what I apparently did,” Yelena said, nervous laughter bubbling from her mouth.
“But it all makes sense. The constant messaging, the phone calls, and how you two are suddenly hanging out at odd hours of the night, all alone,” Natasha said.
Her feet padded across the apartment, a hunter slowly stalking their prey. Yelena’s face twisted into confusion for a brief second. Then, it was like a lightbulb went off atop her head. Her brows raised to her hairline, eyes wide, and a shit-eating grin on her face.
“Oh I get it now!” Yelena exclaimed. She laughed, loosely pointing a finger at Natasha. “I like Y/N, but no. I would never,” she shook her head, laughing once more. “I would never ever ever ever,” Yelena continued.
Natasha was unamused. Her eyes blazed with more anger, scowl tightening even more if that was possible.
“Don’t try that. I already know everything.”
“Oh!” Yelena yelled, folding over in laughter and lightly smacking her left knee. “My dear dear Natasha. You are so stupid sometimes. It’s even better when you don’t even know how stupid you are.”
“I’m not being stupid. You’re the one having an affair with my girlfriend,” Natasha said.
Yelena laughed even louder.
“Stop laughing, I’m serious. After all that bullshit you spewed to me about being family, I should lay you out on the ground for what you’ve done.”
Yelena managed to compose herself enough to straighten her posture, remnants of a giggle she tried to choke leaving her mouth. She wiped away invisible tears from her eyes.
“I’d like to see you try. Now I am going to go somewhere else. And you are going to go and think about everything you just said. Bye bye now.” Then Yelena was gone, shutting the door behind her, echoes of her laughter lingering as it shut.
Natasha was left alone, the stew in her anger within the silence. Slowly, she turned around, heading back to the room she used to share with you. The faint patter of her footsteps on the ground was magnified in her mind. She reached the end of the hall, opening the door to the bedroom.
She sighed, a few stray tears falling from her eyes. She vigorously wiped them away, shutting the door behind her. For a brief second, it felt nice to get out some of her anger, but the satisfaction didn’t last. Then she was left with the lingering feeling of loneliness she wanted to swallow her whole. Slowly, she was turning every single shade of blue, missing the person she thought you had been.
Laying in the bed, allowing her body to sink into the mattress, she simply stared at the ceiling. With unblinking eyes and a stutter in every breath she managed to take. She was drowning, crushed under the weight you’d carelessly placed on her. And then she grew angry. Furious at the way you’d so easily dropped her heart to the ground, shattering it into millions of pieces. It wasn’t fair for you to do this. Not when she’d given you everything she’d had. And normally she was always so calm and collected when it came to her emotions. But not this time.
Impulsively, she stood from the bed and started grabbing everything that had belonged to you. She tossed it all into a pile in the center of the room. Clothes, cords, books, and anything else marked as yours was tossed. Shades of blue turned red as she became a storm. Fury flooded her veins, not showing any signs of stopping.
She reached your side of the bed, the nightstand you’d claimed as yours, her target. Aggressively, you pulled the drawer open and without pausing, grabbed a handful of items and shucked them. Various clattering noises filled the room as the items smacked against the wall. She reached in again, hand wrapped around a small pink porcelain heart. Then she screamed; loud and raw, full of the fire that burned inside her.
“Fuck you,” she exclaimed, throwing it to the ground. It shattered, hundreds of pieces of glass on the ground. She breathed in heavily, slowly exhaling it. Her heart was racing, adrenaline rushing through her veins. But a glint of light caught her attention.
She crouched to the ground to inspect the object. It was small, small glistening gemstones surrounding a larger cut of emerald. The band was golden, delicate in its make. Her breath got caught in her throat. You always did tell her you liked the way emeralds made her eyes shine. A sinking feeling settled in the pit of her stomach, hands shaking as she carefully picked up the ring. Anxiously, she swallowed the lump in her throat. On the left side of her hand, she slowly slid the ring onto her finger. A perfect fit.
It was far past midnight by the time you’d come home. Your eyes were rimmed with red, cheeks puffy, and lips swollen bright red. There was a throbbing migraine that had settled in your head, a pit in your stomach that wouldn’t leave.
Yelena had called a few hours ago, informing you of Natasha’s accusation. You couldn’t believe it. Never in a million years did you think this is what would’ve happened when you decided to broach marriage with Nat. And you couldn’t help but think maybe it just wasn’t supposed to be. The universe had a weird way of working itself out. You just didn’t want that to be the case. And you’d fight tooth and nail for Nat, even if she didn’t want you to.
Quietly, you shut the front door behind you and locked it. You turned and took a deep breath.
“I was wondering how long you’d be gone,” Natasha’s voice was sudden, piercing through the darkness of the room. She was sitting on the couch, legs propped up with a glass of wine in hand. She looked every bit nonchalant, yet you could see the outlines of where a million tears had fallen from her eyes.
You opened your mouth, a million speeches prepared in your mind. Nothing came out. Instead you walked further into the room, cautious of what would happen next. And when you reached the edge of the couch, only a few feet from Natasha, your attention was caught by the ring on the coffee table. The engagement ring you’d bought for her.
“I’m sorry,” was all you could utter.
Natasha sat up, legs falling to the floor. She moved over, patting the now empty spot beside her. Silently, you moved around the couch, taking the offered spot.
Your heart was racing, your throat as dry as the desert. It was all out now. And you weren’t sure if you were ready for her answer.
“No I am,” Natasha said, her voice quiet. It was soft, much unlike the sharpness that she used previously. It made your heart flutter with hope, eyes boring into her. “I--I never should’ve jumped to such a drastic conclusion.”
A hollow chuckle left your mouth, hand on the couch only inches away from hers. And you weren’t sure if you could touch it, take her hand in yours.
“Yeah Yelena told me about what you said,” you said, a small smile on your lips. Natasha scoffed and shook her head with a sardonic grin on her face.
“That was stupid,” she said, then turned her head towards you, eyes meeting yours. “I was stupid.”
“You weren’t--”
“Don’t even try, thank you, but I went off the deep end with those accusations,” Natasha interrupted you. She leaned forward and took her hand in yours. Your fingers interlocked with her, her thumb tracing circles on your hand.
“To be fair, I was acting pretty strange,” you said, the smile on your face widening just a fraction.
“Yeah, you never were a good liar,” faint laughter chased every word, eyes glowing in the darkness. You leaned forward, resting your forehead against hers, your lips brushing against hers.
“I don’t want to lose this with you,” Natasha said, voice quiet, cracks in every other word. You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath and inhaling the smell of her perfume.
“You’re not gonna lose me,” you said, lifting a hand to run it through her hair. Fingertips danced across her scalp, soothing to her rapid-fire mind. “Okay.”
“Okay,” she said, nodding her head.
A comfortable silence wrapped around the room. Your heart was steady, the pit in your stomach lifting. Everything was perfect, stars shining in Natasha's eyes that stared at your still face. Every breath was in sync, losing yourself in her.
“Well aren’t you gonna ask me?” Natasha said. You opened a single eye, mesmerized by the smirk on her lips and the sly glint in her eyes.
“Ask you what?”
“If I’ll marry you,” she said, finger tightening around yours, her spare hand reaching up and gently cupping your face.
“Will you marry me?” you asked.
“Hmm let me think--”
“Natasha!” you exclaimed, taking the hand that was in her hair and gently smacking her on the back of the neck. A flood of giggles left her mouth, eyes shut as little creases formed around her eyes. She was the sun, in your eyes. And if she’d ever left, you’d spend the rest of your days in darkness.
“Kidding. Of course I’ll marry you,” she said, a wide grin on her face. It was warm and bright and everything good in the world. Your face matched hers, and she was the sun, then you were the moon, guiding her through even the darkest of nights.
“Good,” you said, leaning forward and pressing a small kiss to her lips. It was warm; filling you with every shiver and tingling sensation. Her lips were like summer strawberries; sweet and soft. You’d drown yourself in her, and never notice. It could be hell on Earth but you’d be in heaven, blissfully unaware of the chaos.
Tags: @theperfectlovestory​
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titaniaerza18 · 19 hours ago
Everyone: *Playing Twister*
Bucky: Left foot Green!
Steve: *Falls* Something feels off...
Sam: *Falls*
Bucky: *Mumbling* I hope I'm calling these right
Steve: That's it! We forgot he's red & green colorblind !
Everyone: *Groans*
Sam: Right hand Blue!
Bucky: *Posed like he's breakdancing* You did this on purpose didn't you?
Wanda & Natasha: *Pinning Y/n* I'm not complaining...
Sam: I stopped spinning after the fist 5 minutes
Y/n: *Mouthing Thank you to Sam*
Sam: *Winks*
Bucky: *Glares* I'm gonna kill him
Y/n: You leave him alone he's a Saint!
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thatonebrazilian · a day ago
Y/N: So, what's your new year’s resolution?
Natasha *chuckling*: Violence
Y/N: Ha. Very funny.
Y/N: Oh no.
173 notes · View notes
wolferine · 2 days ago
Y/N: Hey, Scott, why do you have an Apple Watch on your ankle?
Natasha: Time to go home, Y/N!
208 notes · View notes
thepsychewrites · 22 hours ago
Ignite Pt. Four | N. Romanoff
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Use your words like a big girl…
Natasha Romanoff x f!Reader
Summary: You face the aftermath of the Attack on Midtown Manhattan, getting some support from Tony and Bruce while beginning to take control of your new life and all it has in store. You haven’t been cleared to start your training as an official Avenger yet, but what happens when you persuade Natasha into a round of sparring?  
> Word Count: 4.6K
> Warnings: Mentions of blood, nausea, stitches, nudity (not graphic), some deprecating thoughts, possible traumatic past event, sexual tension. Some angst and fluff and everything in-between. 
A/N: AHHHHHHHHHHH. That’s how I felt writing the last scene of this chapter. AHHHHHHHH. GUYS- this series is going to put y’all through the wringer, just you wait. I know I’m feeding you guys rn with that last part but y’all better hold on tight to your britches bc it can change so suddenly >:) Also, this part is very long with so much happening but I really needed to get things set up so I hope you guys don’t mind. Please enjoy and lmk what you guys think!! Love you silly geese. <3
Pt. One | Pt. Two | Pt. Three
The sting of antiseptic was what pulled me from the dark nothingness.
A whimper fell from my mouth as I attempted to sit up, not fully aware of my surroundings yet. 
Sitting up was a stupid idea.
I groaned at the tight throbbing that pounded at my side, feeling my body get lowered back down without much of my own doing. My head was pounding and I was suddenly nauseous. 
Bruce was beside me, his hand wrapped over a soaking white towel, splotches of red staining the edges.  
“There she is.” It was Natasha who was standing right behind me where I laid, both of her hands holding my shoulders against the padded bed. It looked like her face had been cleaned of the dirt and blood from the fight, but she was still in her tactile suit.
"Hey kid, welcome back.” Bruce called, turning to the table behind him.
I assumed I was brought inside Stark Tower to the infirmary floor, the bright, clinical lights burning my eyes and the smell of rubbing alcohol flooding my nostrils. Someone had taken my mask off, as I could feel the chilled air rubbing over my cheeks, but, like Natasha, I was still in my suit. Losing track of what Bruce was doing, I turned my attention to the redhead that was peering down at me. Her nimble fingers raked through my hair in an obvious attempt to soothe me.
Would it be bad to say it worked?
“Am I dead?” I whined, catching my breath as Bruce pulled at something buried in my skin.
Natasha’s nails traced tenderly down my temples. “Why, is this what you think heaven looks like?” She teased, a faint grin pulling at her lips. 
I could’ve said yes- with the way the fluorescent lighting hung above her it almost looked like she was glowing, a ring of white shining around her face and body, making her look near angelic. Minus the halo and wings of course, but those aren’t necessary when she looks like-
No. No. No.
Stop it.
I can’t think of her like that.
I breathed out a poor attempt at a laugh. “I don’t think they’d let a misfit like me into that prestigious place.”  
Her gaze softened, and I couldn’t quite decipher the look she gave me, but it wiped the lazy smile right from my face. I didn’t want to look away, but my attention faltered at the sound of Tony walking through the door, his voice traveling with speed through the room. 
“Did nobody care to inform me that Sparky was awake? What’s the diagnosis, doc?” 
I tracked his movements as he came closer, his eyes falling on Bruce while he laid a hand gingerly on my knee. He, too, was cleaned up and seemed rather chipper.
“Nothing too dicey. A couple of stitches, definite bruising- but that seems to be the extent of it. The shrapnel was inches from hitting a major artery line, so, you really dodged a bullet. I’d say you’ll be mostly recovered in just a few weeks. Until then, not too much physical strain.” Bruce explained, wiping his freshly washed hands on a clean rag. I looked down, noticing he had already finished the stitches and had secured a sterile gauze over them.
Tony began nodding his head, holding out a hand to help me sit up. I grabbed onto it, using it as leverage as I swung my feet from the table, letting them hang off the edge for a moment while I caught my breath. Natasha stood from her seat, grabbing a mysterious green drink from behind her and pulling it to her lips while she started for the door.
“Hey, that was for her.” Tony said rather defensively.
Natasha shrugged her shoulders. “She was out and I got thirsty. Plus, it tastes like shit, so I’m doing her a favor.” She sent a wink in my direction, slowing down as she got to the door. “You guys coming or what?”
I kept my gaze to the floor, wondering if I should just let this nagging thought I had go. I sighed, knowing that now was the best time to spill. “I actually wanted to talk to you two for a minute, if that’s okay?” I mumbled, directing my eyes to Tony and Bruce.
Natasha tilted her head, sipping down more of the green drink before moving for the elevators in the hall.
Once I knew Natasha was out of ear shot, I turned my left palm over. It was trembling hard, the sight reminding me of a newborn puppy. I wiggled my fingers, clenched it slightly, focused so hard I was sure I’d pop a blood vessel- yet nothing. Not even a measly spark or a thin plume of smoke. I found the two men staring at me, their faces riddled with concern.
I was choking up before I got any words out. “I… I um… I can’t do it, anymore. It feels like when you go to use a lighter… but your fingers too slippery and you can’t get a good grip. So- so you’re pushing down the gear… but nothing happens… and-”
“And,” Tony started, taking my nervous hand into both of his calm ones and squeezing it tightly, “it’ll come back. I know it will. It was scary out there, kid, but you held your own and you did a damn good job at doing so. It might just be exhaustion. Has it ever gone away before?”
And I swore to myself I’d never bring it up again, let alone think about it.
My mouth was dry as I spoke, the images playing in my mind like they had on many sleepless nights before. “Eight years ago. I… I lost it for a few days, but the circumstances were drastically different.” 
“How so?”
Don’t tell him.
You’re not allowed.
The side of my cheek was nearly bleeding from how hard I was biting on it. I knew the man had good intentions, I did. But I wasn’t ready to spill all of my guts quite yet. 
“They just were.” 
It was the best answer I could give.
The only answer, for that matter. 
I felt a cool stream of air flow from Tony’s nose, one of his palms laying flat against my back and helping me down from the infirmary bed. A hard buzz washed through my ankles as I landed on the floor, holding me stationary for a moment until it passed. Tony whispered something to Bruce, which I didn’t catch, before walking with me to the elevators. 
We waited as he scanned his right hand on a device attached to the wall, the elevator doors dinging open moments later. “What’s your favorite color?” He suddenly asked moving in, the volume of his voice catching me off guard. 
My eyes were glued to the rapidly changing numbers on the elevator wall. “I don’t know. A dark forest green, maybe?” The door chimed open on the sixtieth story and Tony was first to step out. I followed him through a furnished common area, past a kitchen, and down a wide, open hallway that only contained two doors on either side before it split off and continued in another direction. I could hardly keep up, but he stopped abruptly outside the first door, turning and looking at me apologetically. 
“That sucks, because I got you purple.” 
I wasn’t given much time to be confused before he opened the door, revealing a bedroom inside. It was of decent size. The floor was a creme marble with a large rug covering the center. The walls were painted a deep grey, a few paintings nailed throughout. A queen bed sat in the center of the right wall, adorned with a lavender comforter, a white throw blanket, and matching pillows. A single night stand was tucked beside it. There was a desk near the door and a hefty dresser under a mounted flatscreen tv opposite of the bed, next to it was another door. It was cozy, to say the least.
Tony stood tall next to me, wearing his heart on his sleeve as the smile on his face couldn’t be contained. I, on the other hand, had no idea what to say. 
“So, whatcha think?” He asked, obvious to my awe. 
“Is... is this... for me?” I asked turning to face him. His smile faltered as the expression I wore might have looked indifferent. 
He was quick to nod. “After today’s events and from the conversations I’ve had with Fury... I want this to be a somewhat regular thing. The seven of us- doing what we did today more often and doing it together. Doing it as a team. And what do teams do? They lookout for each other. I have the resources, so I’m offering a room to anyone who wants a place to stay, whether for forever or just temporarily. I also happen to know you’re in need of a place to stay, so... why not here?” 
My heart was swollen from the generosity. I wasn’t completely sold on the idea of the seven of us as a team of crime-fighting super freaks, but with time and persuasion, I’m sure I could come around. Plus- he was right. I had nowhere else to go. I rubbed over the edge of the fluffy rug with my boot- my version of testing the waters.
He raised a brow at my lack of words. “Okay? Is that an affirmative ‘okay’, or…?”
“Yes, I’m saying okay. Okay to whatever plan you have for this… team, and an okay to me staying.”
His smile returned, full to its former glory. “Fantastic. Your belongings are being sent over by S.H.I.E.L.D, you know the ones you left on the plane on the helicarrier- so they should be here tomorrow. In the mean time there’s extra clothes in the dresser and the on-suite bathroom is always stocked. Banner, Rogers, and Romanoff are planning on staying as well, so I’ll call you all up later so we can have a quick chat about the building and set some ground rules, sound good?” He exclaimed before holding a finger up.
“Oh, and there’s one more thing. Jarvis?” He called loud and clear, his eyes up toward the ceiling.
“Yes, sir?” An accented voice, one that was near human, yet somehow noticeably robotic, called back.
Tony chuckled, his eyes falling back to me. “That is Jarvis. My intelligent friend… and now yours. You can ask him anything and he will answer you. And when I say anything, I mean anything and everything. Isn’t that right, Jarvis?”
“Yes, Mr. Stark. It is in my programming. Nice to meet you, Y/n. I hope you find your accommodations suitable.” The humanly fluctuation in it’s voice startled me, but it certainly isn’t the weirdest thing I’ve come across today.
“Thank you, Jarvis.” I responded.
“Of course.”
Once that introduction was over with, Tony said his goodbyes.
“Get comfortable. Make yourself at home.” He said as he left the room. He popped his head back in for only a second. “Not too at home, though. Have some manners.” And with that being said he finally disappeared, the faint ding of the elevator letting me know he was long gone.
I closed the door and tossed off my boots, shedding the rest of my suit and undergarments on my way to the bathroom.
The bathroom was just as luxurious as the bedroom was, a wide sink with gorgeous dark granite countertops, a walk-in shower and a freestanding oval tub, one that could fit three people inside if necessary. I stood there admiring it in my now naked form, slowly drawing my attention to the mess in the mirror.
I looked awful. Bruises scattered along my collarbones, chest, and arms. Dirt clung to my hair and neck. Specks of dried blood were smeared all over. My shoulders were stiff and it hurt to breathe. I reeked of sweat and ash, the two scents making me cringe in disgust. I huffed, dragging tired fingers over my eyes to wipe some of the grime away. It was a chore dragging myself over to the shower, but I did it anyway- turning the knob down as far as it would go. I knew it was good to get in when the entire room was thick with steam.
Using extra caution to not irritate my stitches, I showered, using the expensive products already in here to scrub away any trace of the fight. The water was blistering and I’d be lying if I said it felt good, but it was the closest thing to normal I could offer myself in this moment. So I let it be. I let the boiling steam fill my lungs, and I let myself drown in it.
Just to feel normal.
Three weeks feels like three years when you have nothing but time on your hands.
I was getting restless, running around my room most hours of the day even though I was still supposed to be taking it easy.
The wound was nearly healed and it didn’t hurt much anymore, only if I poked at it hard or stretched my torso all weird. Yet every time I had asked to start on some part of my training, I was turned down.
Four days ago I told Tony about my past. At least- the bigger, more important parts that were crucial for him to understand if I were to be on this team. He was going on and on about ‘not keeping secrets from each other’ over dinner the night prior, and it had weighed on my mind the entire night. So, I spilled.
It was a quiet two hours on his end, letting me have the floor to get it all out. I told him about my kidnapping, about my time at T.R.I.D.E.C, about the directors, my training, and the way they treated me.
When it came to my training, I explained how it was the best thing about the whole damn place. Despite being rigorous and intense, it was an outlet for my anger. Plus- any reason to leave my fortified room was a good reason.
I even spilled about S.H.I.E.L.D and Fury’s incessant need to get me on their team the second I got out. He was oddly understanding.
But comfort wasn’t his strong suit.
And I was okay with that.
After the long life story, he sent me back up to my room with a pint of mint chocolate ice cream ‘on the house’, even though I don’t pay for shit anyway, and a promise to start my training soon.
That promise obviously didn’t mean much since I was still being coddled and told that I’m not healed enough for that kind of physical activity.
Regardless, I was still doing workouts in the comfort of my bedroom, jogging in circles for miles on end and doing push-ups until my arms would give.
I even had a good routine going on, and this morning was no different.
It was five thirty a.m when my alarm went off, my arm reaching out to silence it before it could bother someone else. Time spent in the bathroom was always the same this early:
Wash hands.
Wash face.
Brush teeth.
Comb hair.
Fix said combed hair.
Wash hands again.
Lights out.
It was quick, simple, and thorough enough for me. After that I trudged my way into the kitchen, already knowing exactly who I’d see in there this goddamn early in the morning.
“Morning Steve.” I yawned, tugging out a stool at the center island to plop on. I rested my head on my hand, watching the tall man as he went about his own schedule. At five forty five in the morning, every morning, he was in the kitchen, making his breakfast smoothie and omelette.
“Mornin’ sleepyhead, you hungry?” He asked, his arm flexing under his black t-shirt as he poked at his eggs on the skillet. He turned to me and raised a brow, awaiting an answer he already knew.
“Mhm.” I simply hummed.
A grin pulled at his lips as he turned back. “It’s a good thing I made two, then.” After another minute he turned the burner off, taking the spatula and plating the omelettes. He brought a plate to the space in front of me, handing over a fork before grabbing the salt and pepper. After sitting himself beside me, the both of us ate away at the food, a bout of small talk arising.
“Got any big plans today?” He asked, wiping at his mouth with a napkin.
I stabbed at the eggs and took another bite before answering. “Hm, not really. Although, I was going to ask you if perhaps, maybe, I could join you on your run this morning?” I swallowed hard, looking over to the super soldier with a pout on my face in hopes he’ll fall for it.
He didn’t.
Of course he didn’t.
A disappointed sigh fell from him, his eyes rolling at my desperate ones. “You know I’m not allowed, Y/n. As soon as you’re one hundred percent cleared, we’ll go together. Until then, I’m only following orders.”
I groaned. “You’re no fun. And aren’t you supposed to be like- our captain?” I poked, putting emphasis on the title. “Doesn’t that mean that you make the orders around here?”
He chuckled lowly, shoveling down more of his food. “Not medical orders. I am many things, but a doctor is not one of them. Until you’re cleared, no can do.”
I think the way I was looking at him ratted me out.
Unless the super soldier serum had some sort of mind reading capability pumped into him as a fun bonus. 
“You’ve already been running, haven’t you?” He questioned, his eyes narrowing at my smirk.
“More like jogging, but yes. Have been for the past week and a half.” I lowered my voice to a whisper at the last part.
He shook his head, taking one last bite before his plate was cleared and he finally stood. “I’d advise you to stop doing that, then. I might not have medical authority over you, but I sure as hell can bar you from training for as long as I want.”
I gasped, my hand going over my heart in faux surprise. “Watch your language, Captain.” I teased, sliding down from the stool and dropping my plate in the sink.
His head fell in annoyance. “I mean it, Y/n.”
“I know you do, Steve. That’s why I’m going to go find someone else to bug.”
We said our goodbyes and I left the kitchen, padding my feet along the tile floors until I got back to my room. Nobody else gets up as early as Steve and I, so I had some time to kill until I sought out my next victim. Throwing on a pair of black workout shorts and a roomy sweatshirt I went ahead and did my morning stretches and meditation. 
Once my limbs were nicely warmed up I grabbed my headphones, slipping them on and playing some dark noise on half volume. I sat in the center of my rug criss-cross-applesauce style and rolled my shoulders back, closing my eyes and focused on my breathing. 
Bruce was the one to suggest meditation. He said it’s the one thing that helps keep him grounded and calm after a long day. The both of us struggle similarly with our nerves and negative emotions, so I took him up on it. He went over the best way of going about it, but ultimately told me I’ll find my own way of meditating, and that no single way is the right way. 
I felt an odd weight lift from me, a static numbness washing through my arms and legs. My heart rate slowed dramatically and the dark noise from my headphones was fading out. I sat there, silent and content. 
I’ve been told many times in the past that my hearing is impeccable, some would even suggest it was in-human. But that wasn’t the case right now. 
I felt her long before I heard her. 
The woman had this essence about her I can’t quite put to words. I don’t believe words would put to justice the life that is... her. I felt her presence the moment she opened my door, her eyes landing on me- simply watching me where I sat. 
With my headphones on and my eyes still shut, I spoke. “Do you need something, Natasha?” 
I startled her. Even through the thick headphones I heard her tiny inhale. 
“Just wanted to see if you ate already.” 
She knew I had been getting up early and eating with Steve most mornings. I wasn’t going to push it, though.
Not today.
With a gentle nudge I pulled off my headphones, switching them off and folding them up. I looked at her leaning against my doorframe, remnants of sleep evident on her face. “Steve made breakfast. There might be leftovers if you want any.” 
Natasha had decided to take Tony up on his offer and stay in the tower. Her room was on the other side of the common area, although she normally wasn’t in there besides to sleep. 
The two of us had slipped into a friendship rather easily. Fighting alongside one another in a life-or-death battle against aliens really helped close that gap, and for that I was thankful. I didn’t feel the need to hide behind a facade around her. 
Not entirely, anyway. 
It seemed like she had something else she wanted to say, but instead muttered a quick, “Okay” before moving to close the door. 
“Hey,” I called, getting her attention as the door crept back open. 
“I was uh... I was wondering if maybe I could ask for a favor?” 
“And what would that be?” 
I stood, fiddling with the ends of my sweatshirt sleeves. “Would you be interested in sparring at all today? Steve said he was busy... so.” 
Her head tilted to the side in question. “Aren’t you on rest right now?” 
“Not necessarily...” 
She paused, narrowing her sage green eyes at me. “I’ll be down in the training room in fifteen- but you didn’t hear it from me.”   
Hook, line, and sinker.
I decided to be a little fashionably late, finding myself in the gym twenty minutes after Natasha had left my room. 
She was getting warmed up, taking a few last swings at a punching bag nearly double her size as I walked down to the sparring platform. I was still in my workout shorts, but had switched my sweatshirt for a t-shirt so I wouldn’t leave with sweat stains all over. 
“What a coincidence, didn’t think I’d see you here today.” She winked, wiping at her brow-bone. 
“Oh yeah- a total coincidence.” I teased, stretching out my arms a bit more as we met in the middle. 
“So, you want to start with sparring you said?”
I hummed. “I think I can handle that for today.”
Her eyes trailed over my legs. “How much training have you had in the past?”
Her gaze flicked up to meet mine, a warm smile gracing her face. “Well, I have a few rules to go over. They’re the golden rules of physical fighting and defense.” She took her stance, her hands balling into fists in front of her chest. 
“Go on.” I encouraged, mimicking her form as she sent the first swing my way. I dodged it effortlessly, ducking again as a second fist followed. It went on like this while she listed her rules, one of us swinging while the other moved expertly from it, redirecting arms and legs every which way. 
Rule Number One: Always protect the face and neck first. 
Rule Number Two: Stay sharp, don’t lose your focus. 
Rule Number Three: Stay in control of the situation. 
Rule Number Four: Don’t fall for the obvious. 
I bent into a squat as she sent a deadly kick over me, smirking as I stood back up. “How old are you again, Natasha?” I meant for the question to be innocent at first, but she wasn’t playing as dirty as I wanted her to. 
“Twenty seven.” She answered in a huff.
I chuckled, blocking her arm from my chest yet again while getting a direct hit at her side. “So- you’re about six years older. That’s six more years of life and training under your belt, yet I’m beating your ass like I’m getting payed to do so. Why is that, Natasha? Scared to rough me up a bit?”
She shook her head slowly. “You know, you’re getting real bold despite not having your powers back. If I were you, I’d be really careful of the next words to come from that mouth of yours...” She warned, blocking two hits as our arms nearly tangled together. 
It was odd seeing the similarities in our fighting styles, the both of us nearing the same level of strength. I wasn’t sure why I gained such a taunting attitude when I sparred with others, but she didn’t seem to be bothered by it.
I’d even go as far to say she... well, it almost seemed as if she enjoyed it. 
“Aww, is someone getting upset? We can stop if you’re getting worked up, I know how intimidating it can be to spar with someone who clearly has the upper ha-”
The wind was knocked out of me faster than I could blink, a pissed off Natasha now hairs away from my face as she pinned me down against the floor. Shit- her nose was practically touching mine. Her breath was warm as it danced across my face, leaving the scent of plain black coffee in its wake, the one she undoubtedly had before coming down here. It was inviting. Even as her eyes darkened into something along the lines of scary it lured me in. Not to mention the way her knee was between my legs, her hands gripping tight at my forearms to keep them on the mat. I felt her nails in my skin and I was sure they’d leave a dent or mark to look at later. 
“What was that?” She raised her brows, a coaxing tone to her low voice. 
It was as if my brain turned to mush from her stare, no coherent words making their way from my mouth. “I... I um...” 
With a tilt of her head and the formation of a mocking grin, she whispered, “Cat got your tongue? Come on, use your words like a big girl.” 
I knew Natasha was just being herself. She liked being flirty with everyone. 
But fuck.
“N- Natasha...” 
She hummed, still millimeters from my face.
“My stitches-” I huffed, peering down to where her other leg was pressing deep into my healing side. 
She moved off of me so quick had it been any other day I would’ve sworn a rogue flame came to life and burned her. “Holy shit, I’m so sorry- are you-”
In a dangerous and incredibly fluid motion I stuck my leg out and swung it under her, making her loose her balance. Natasha landed beside me on the mat with a soft thud and I knew she had been completely caught off guard. 
With both of us now on the floor I rolled my head to flash her a shit-eating grin. “Rule number four, don’t fall for the obvious. If you think they’re tricking you, they probably are. Maybe you should read up on your own rules, Nat. I don’t think they’re sticking.” 
Ignite Series Tag List: 
@fortunatelynerdylight @grrrldemolition​ @rainyprincefest @catswag22 @women-am-i-right @sieleonardo @crisprcrash​ @lolabuni @natasharomanoffswifeyyy​ @mommynat​ @dakota-moon0315​ @leticinhale1 @noob-master-69-1​ @unlady-like-12-25-36​ @lesbeanforluthor @sarcasm-in-wonderland​ @jadereadsfics​ @romanoff99​ @transbi-spidey​ @marie-yt-blog @beckylynch-alexmorgan @escapetotheeclipse​ @yelenasvest1 @wildnightuniverse​ @mrs-davidson​ @vicmc624​ @wandanatvoid​ @diaryoflife​ @pawiie​ @stephaguirre​ @lorsstar1st​ @cartergrace​ @idontknowhowtogay​​ @killme3sl0wly @moonlarson​ @salemisreallycool​​ 
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8plasma · 2 days ago
never alone
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note: i switched it up a little. reader is wanda’s daughter and dating nat. HS au.
warnings: ed fic
not tagging anyone since its a sensitive subject ‹3
. . .
everything unfolded right before natasha could even realize what was happening. at first, it was just going to the gym to tone up, which she didn’t mind at all – although she was sure to remind you that you were beautiful just the way you were.
you lost a few pounds, went down a couple of pants sizes, and that was that. for a while anyway. you were proud of yourself. for the first time in your life, you’d felt something you couldn’t quite identify, but you wanted more of it.
not just a few months later would you come to regret that train of thought. what you were battling with was no longer about losing weight. it was a need, something you couldn’t go against.
natasha watched you from afar. you were sitting in class writing down something she couldn’t decipher. your penmanship was heavy, bold with what appeared to be anger. her eyebrows furrowed and she reached into her pocket for her phone, sneaking it under her desk.
you felt a buzz in your pocket and you looked down to see that it was a text from natasha.
nat: hey, you alright?
pressing your thumbs against your screen, you sent her a quick text back.
– yeah, i’m good.
nat: your piece of paper says otherwise.
turning your head to face her, you discreetly raised your eyebrow in her direction.
nat: don’t give me that look >:(.
– hush natty, i’m trying to learn.
nat: okay fair. just let me know if you need anything alright?
– always.
she didn’t bother you the rest of the day, only sticking to her usual girlfriend self. soft touches and sneaky kisses were the way to go.
you met her in the hallways after school, your textbooks piled high below your chin.
“hey baby,” natasha greeted, hugging you from behind. she hid her grimace as her chest met your shoulder blades.
“hello there, natty. ready to go back to my place?”
she clutched her hand into yours, “when would i not be?”
“my mom’s outside in the car, lets hurry before she starts honking.” natasha nodded, but not before stopping you to lighten your load of textbooks. she took all of them from you despite your protests.
“hi miss maximoff-”
“natasha, darling, it’s just wanda. we talked about this.” your mom smiled.
“sorry, it’s a habit of respect.”
“i know. now lets go home and get you two fed.”
natasha once again noticed the downcast of your lips, a detail your mother failed to see. food was the issue, she came to a conclusion.
. . .
when you arrived home you dragged natasha up the stairs. some time together before dinner would ease some of your anxiety.
“i’m going to run to the bathroom real quick, be right back.” natasha announced, letting you settle in comfortably on your bed.
natasha had a mind of her own though. frowning, she opened your bathroom drawers to find a half-used bottle of laxatives and a measuring tape. she tried to reassure herself of your situation, but that didn’t help much when she found the set of glass scales hidden in your bathroom closet. next to it were numbers written down on a notepad. your weight, each time her eyes read down, was only getting lower.
you needed help, but there wasn’t much that natasha could do. so she did the only thing she knew was right.
go to your mother.
the redhead peeked in your room to find you studying, too lost in thought to notice or hear her creep by.
she waved towards wanda, catching her attention and putting her finger over her mouth as a signal for your mom to not announce her arrival.
“i think something’s wrong with y/n.”
wanda stopped cooking, pausing her movements and bringing the stove back to its original off setting.
“how do you mean?” she whispered.
natasha bit her lip. you’d be so upset if she told, but your health was more important than her own worries.
“natasha, it’s okay. you can tell me.” wanda reassured her.
“i think- well… i don’t know. they’ve been- i found some things- i’m sorry, i’m just nervous.” wanda put her hand on natasha’s shoulder. “what’s going on?”
“you remember how they just wanted to tone up a few months ago? and how they started going to the gym?” wanda nodded. “well- i found laxatives and a scale and a tape measure when i was going through their things. and then i found a notepad with their weight written on it. it keeps getting lower, wanda, and they keep getting thinner.”
natasha took a breath. “and i tried to reassure them that they’re beautiful and wonderful just the way they are, but i think something’s really wrong-”
“natasha, natasha, hey. i’m so glad you told me this. i’ll take care of things, okay? none of this is on you. go get them and tell them dinner’s in 15.”
“thank you, wanda.”
“i appreciate you coming to me about this.”
natasha nodded and made her way back to your room. “hey, dinner’s ready in 15. wanna help set up the table?”
“only if you give me a kiss.”
“only if you come over here,” your girlfriend challenged.
“mmmmpppphhh” you groaned, setting your schoolwork aside. you trudged over to where your girlfriend was, leaning in to kiss her lips. natasha tried to get more out of you, but you shoved her back with a smirk.
“later, romanoff. we’ve got to go help my mom.”
. . .
fifteen minutes later and you were sitting next to natasha at the table. your fork stayed flat against the wood, untouched as both your mother and girlfriend began to dig in.
“y/n? you going to eat?” wanda’s voice rang out. she gave you a look, one you couldn’t quite place, but you knew you had to do better at hiding your issue.
“yup! just admiring…”
well, that’s a stupid excuse.
“yep,” you answered, averting your eyes. all you could think about was how bad you were for even wanting the food in the first place. and how awful you’d be if you ate it.
you couldn’t let that happen.
“you know what, i’m actually feeling kind of sick. i think i’ll have to-”
“y/n? sit back down please.” your mother demanded softly, stopping you from leaving the room. you looked towards nat to find her staring at anything that wasn’t you.
“i think we need to talk, sweetheart. and judging by your face i think you already know what it’s about.”
yeah, you knew. you just didn’t want to face it.
but no one ever does.
“can nat stay?” wanda nodded, setting her plate aside.
“you’re sick.”
“not really…” you mumbled.
“you are, and you know i can’t allow you to continue.”
natasha cupped her hand in yours. “it’s okay to ask for help, there’s nothing wrong with that.”
“i don’t need help.”
“you’ve been skipping meals-”
“so what? i forget about breakfast and lunch a few times. who cares? people do that all the time!” you snapped, all of a sudden feeling suffocated by the both of them.
“it’s more than that and you know it, y/n.” wanda jumped in. you shrugged, “it’s not a big deal.”
your mother hummed, “denying yourself the nutrients your body needs to live is kind of a big deal. so what’s going on? what happened?”
“it’s okay, you can tell us.” natasha reassured, rubbing her thumb across your knuckles.
you sighed. there was no getting out of this anyway, so you might as well speak now. “i don’t know. everything just happened so fast, and now i can’t stop. it felt good at first, like i was on top of the world. but the past month and a half or so have just been awful. i feel awful all the time and it won’t stop. i just want it to stop.”
tears began to well up in your eyes and you didn’t bother trying to hide it. everything that led up to this moment began making itself known.
“hey, hey. it’s okay. we’re here now. we’re going to get you the help you need.” natasha cooed softly.
“natasha’s right. we’re both here now, and we’re not leaving you alone, sweetheart. you’re my kid, i’m not ever going to leave you.”
“i’m just tired.”
“i know you are, but you’ve got so much ahead of you. we’re going to get through this, you, me and nat.”
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natperv · 23 hours ago
fem!reader x natasha
♡ for readers who never felt like they were enough for their family. who wished they had their own black widow to save them. ♡
a/n: this is me ignoring all my unfinished drafts and writing this at 4am because i’m sad. 
summary: natasha comforts you when her first time meeting your (toxic) parents goes south
genre: fluff? angst? idk what to label it
warnings: ? parents being assholes
word count: 1.6k
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it’s happening. it’s really happening. you’re letting natasha meet your family. you feel sick to your stomach the whole drive down. you’ve been dreading this moment. since the day you met natasha, she and you have existed in your own little bubble. you didn’t want to taint her, didn’t want her near all the abuse and the torment that your childhood home held. part of you feared that she’d meet your parents, and she’d start to see you the way they did. the way you saw yourself, sometimes. you have been dating for nearly eight months, and every time nat brought it up you would push the topic aside. she didn’t really pester you, considering she was a pretty private person herself, but ever since two weeks ago, when she officially introduced you to her sister, yelena, she’s brought it up enough times for you to get the hint. you knew that was a big step for her and you wanted to show her how much you valued her, that she was willing to open up to you and show you such an important part of her life.
so, the fifth time she slyly asked about your family in the middle of an entirely unrelated conversation, you decided to just do it.
“you know what.” you’d said, a little tipsy. “what?” she’d replied, tilting her head. “do you wanna meet them?” natasha nodded, more excited than you’d seen her in weeks. the smile on her face made you instantly light up, shoving down any lingering feelings of worry for the time being. “yes, yes, i’d love to.” she’d kissed your cheek, champagne glass in hand, a beat of silence. “another round, hun?”
what’s the worse that could happen? that was the mantra you were repeating over and over in your head as the two of you parked in your parents driveway. you, in the passenger seat. you turned off the music, suddenly, but natasha was too focused on the road ahead to notice. she was squinting, eyebrows furrowed, that cute look she had on her face whenever she was focusing on something. you found yourself smiling, despite everything. the two of you sat in the car before it was time to leave. you hadn’t moved, and natasha noticed your stillness, the nervous air around you. she didn’t want to admit it, but it was rubbing off on her too. her hands gripped the steering wheel, and she drummed her fingers once or twice before you finally spoke up. 
“look,” you stared at the ceiling momentarily, “i just..” she turned to look at you, concerned. she probably thinks this has something to do with her, with you dating a woman, maybe, how are you supposed to tell her that you’re the problem? that if any one of your siblings had brought her home she’d be showered in affection and acceptance? “my family, they-” you paused, again, searching for the words, but you didn’t need them. natasha set her hand on top of yours, rubbing your knuckles with her thumb. “y/n, i don’t care what they’re like,” you close your eyes, taking her voice in, drowning everything else out, “i want to know where you came from.” she grabs your face in her other hand and caresses your cheek gently. “this is good, right?” you nod, even though it didn’t feel very good, “we’re okay.”
“you’re right. yeah,” you exhale a breath you didn’t know you were holding in. natasha isn’t them. she loves you. she won’t hurt you the way they did. “yeah.” you repeat, meeting her eyes. she smirks. “let’s go, hm?” she nods towards the building, “parents love me.” she strokes your chin before pulling away and unbuckling her seatbelt. “you have nothing to worry about.” you wished all of you could believe her.
your mother greeted the two of you at the porch. you hadn’t seen her in years, but it looked like she didn’t age at all. she was always so graceful and put together. you smiled, but her eyes glazed over you and landed on natasha instead. you almost faltered, but you brushed it off. natasha held out her hand and your mother took it, reeling over nat’s job, how they’ve heard so much about her, “your reputation precedes you,” your mother says. internally, you felt a boost of pride. it seems like being with her has at the very least given them something else to focus on. you met your father in the parlor, who seemed less impressed with nat’s career, but acted kindly regardless. 
they said very little to you. your father gave you a curt nod of acknowledgement “y/n.” was all he said. and then they gave her a tour of the house. your parents. they were flattering, friendly--pleasant, even. for a second, you almost couldn’t believe yourself. had you imagined everything they put you through? were they always so loving? did you simply let yourself get lost in the haze of your adolescent, hormonal past? until, of course, you reached your old bedroom. “oh, nat, come look,” you suddenly found yourself excited, holding her hand and leading her towards the door. your name was still badly carved into the wood with a blunt hunting knife. “this was my room!” you parents trailed behind you, “i don’t think that’s such a good idea, y/n.” your father said, impatient. you rolled your eyes and opened the door, anyways. 
what waited for you nearly broke your heart. the room was empty, no shelves full of your favorite childhood books, not the bed you stirred in every night, not your carpets or your toys or your clothes. you gaped, stunned. natasha was fairly good at hiding her emotions, but you’d learned to read her like a book by now, and she looked almost as taken aback as you. “where’s--” you turned to face them, “what happened to all my stuff?” your parents looked at each other, that face they made like oh, not this again, y/n, always causing a scene. “honey, don’t be so shocked, you haven’t been here in ages--what were we supposed to do? you weren’t planning on moving back in, were you?” your mother chuckled, moving further into the room until she was at your side. “but, my things--what--what did you sell them?” 
“sell them! well that’s just ridiculous,” she let out a stifled laugh, for a second you thought she might say they kept them, that it’s all in the basement, until your father spoke up, “we donated everything, sweetheart, and--and to a lovely organization--” he adjusted his tie as he spoke, avoiding your eyes like he always did when you were younger. “--we didn’t think you’d need any of that junk anyways, y/n, you’re not a kid anymore.” your mother nodded in agreement and you looked to meet natasha’s eyes for the first time. pity. that was the first thing you saw. you blinked away tears. years and years of mementos from your life, thrown away like garbage.
“you’re not going to cause a scene again are you?” your mother patted your shoulder then, in a way that was meant to appear comforting but only made you stiffen. “the whole family still remembers what happened last year, dear, you can’t really afford another scandal.” you brushed her off and she sighed, rolling her eyes, “she’s quite the handful, isn’t she?” she directed her sentence at natasha, like they were old friends. you felt something in you break. you didn't want to meet nat’s eyes, you didn’t want to see the expression in them. what would it be? disappointment? embarrassment? hurt? “excuse me.” you could barely manage the words, already on the verge of tears. you kept your head down as you shoved past the group, down the hallway and into the nearest restroom.
you locked the door behind you and leaned back against the wood, just like you did when you were fourteen, just like you did when you were twelve, just like you’ve been doing your entire life. you kept you lips sealed as a sob threatened to escape and you shut your eyes tightly as the tears started to fall. you felt so stupid for crying over something so ridiculous. something they didn’t even care about. only a seconds had passed before you heard a knock at the door. you had felt natasha’s presence before she announced it. her knock was unique in it’s own right. you could recognize it anywhere. it was unlike your father’s stern, curt knock, or your mother’s repetitive one. it was gentle. at least for you it was. “hey, hun.” her voice brought a wave of relief over you. “you wanna open this door?” you could hear her smirk through the wood. 
you turned to unlock it and let her in, moving to rest your arms against the sink, looking down at the drain so that you didn’t have to face her. “y/n.” she stood behind you, wrapping her arms around your back. you shook your head. “i’m sorry.. i should have never--” you sniffled, “i knew this was a bad idea.” she knelt down beside you, bringing two fingers to your chin so that you had to face her. you could smell her from here. her signature scent. “you have nothing to apologize for.” she ran her thumb along her cheek and wiped your tears as they fell. “this isn’t what i expected,” her voice was low, like she didn’t want to startle you. you started to say something, another apology, but she continued, “you are nothing like them.” at this, you let out a sob. she pulled you into a hug and you collapsed against her, your head fell to her shoulder as she stroked your back. you had become a person worthy of her love without their help, you thought. you had become a person worthy of her love without their help.
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vancityfire13 · a day ago
Could you do a part two to "when you're not around" with the aftermath maybe? The voice belonging to a teammate of theirs and y/n trying to move on but Natasha won't let her. And everywhere she turns she sees Nat or the woman the voice belongs too. If at all possible a character death*cough cough*y/ns to fully traumatize Nat bc I'ma dick and she ruined the best thing she ever had.
Hello, tada. This is not my natural genre of story. So, apologies if it's not so good. <3
Natasha Romanoff x Reader
Word Count: 1.4K
A/N: This directly follows another story called When You're Not Around.
You saw Carol a week later at the Avengers' Compound.
You weren't living with Natasha anymore. You weren't sure if that meant that she now was.
Carol watched you from across the room. Rhodey kept up his quiet conversation, but her eyes tracked you instead. Her face was stoic.
You clenched the fist that she couldn't see, willing yourself not to cry. You hurried to the elevator, forcing yourself to seem relaxed.
Carol's eyes were too perceptive. She knew exactly what she'd done.
The doors opened at last and you walked into the only other person you didn't want to meet.
Natasha touched your shoulders automatically as she tried to steady you.
'Sorry.' You muttered, slipping out of her hold as you walked around her body.
'Y/N.' Natasha murmured and you tried to ignore a flashback to the most humiliating night of your life. You hated hearing her say your name now.
You stared blankly at the space just behind her, Natasha seemed undecided as to whether she should reenter the elevator. You didn't acknowledge her until the doors had closed again. You pretended that you hadn't smelled her shampoo, that you didn't still love her.
Finally alone, you let out one long exhale. You pressed back against the hard mirrored wall. Your life felt too claustrophobic.
You found yourself thinking about her as you began your workout in the gym. Not about the way that Natasha had made you feel that night.
But, about all the moments that had come before.
You remembered another night. Coming home to find Natasha dancing alone in the living room. Her earphones trailed down her front, to the phone in her pocket.
Her grin as she caught sight of you in the doorway. The sway of her hips as she walked towards you, leading you back to her makeshift dance floor.
Time had always been better spent when you were with her.
You had a full team meeting scheduled in the afternoon. It became immediately clear that rumours had spread. Pepper squeezed your shoulder sympathetically as she walked past you.
Natasha took the seat beside you when she entered. You wondered if it was years of habit, or intentional. You started to turn in your chair, preferring to face the meeting leader.
Until you realised who it was, Carol stood up at the head of the table. She tucked her shoulder-length blonde hair behind her ear. She'd never looked so awkward before.
Someone muttered something behind you and you knew instinctively what the comment was about.
Carol's eyes flickered to you. Shock stabbed you as you caught the obvious resentment in her stare.
The room suddenly felt far too small. You scraped your chair back without warning.
Natasha touched your thigh as if to stop you.
'Fuck off.' You muttered, getting to your feet.
'Must be so embarrassed.' You heard another quiet murmur as you left the room. Tears pricked your eyes as you realised how impossible your hopes of returning to something like normalcy had been.
Your chest felt painfully tight.
Your phone buzzed in your pocket.
You ignored it, heading back to the lobby.
Natasha always knew you too well.
As the elevator doors opened, you saw her rush out of the door to the stairwell.
'Leave me alone.' You demanded quietly as she hurried towards you.
'Can't we move past this?' Natasha asked, voice close to pleading.
You stopped in your tracks, incredulous at her words.
Your arms flew in the air with frustration.
'Why the fuck do you think I'm here?' You shouted, gesturing to the building around you.
Natasha looked like she hadn't been sleeping. You tried not to wonder if Carol was around when she had nightmares.
'We're not seeing each other.' Natasha told you abruptly. 'I, we, thought it would be better for the team.'
You bit down on too many angry retorts. You hated the bitter pain of this. You hated it because you still loved her.
Natasha looked scared. She looked smaller than you remember, shoulder's hunched slightly.
Some instinct, deep inside you, kicked in and the fight left you all at once.
'Just do whatever makes you happy.' You muttered, voice dropping as the hopelessness overwhelmed you.
When you walked away again, Natasha let you leave.
It was easier you found, for you to stay silent.
Natasha and Carol had a softer kind of intimacy than you'd expected. You couldn't ignore it on missions.
Carol kissed Natasha's cheek every time they left the quinjet. Natasha wrapped her in a tight hug every time they reunited afterward.
Your dynamic with the rest of the team didn't work anymore. For too long, it had just been you and Natasha as a pair.
You didn't know your other teammates as well as you thought. Soon, they stopped trying to engage you in conversation. You understood why. The time period for pity lapsed, and you still didn't know how to smile and mean it.
Someone left a pamphlet on depression in your locker at the gym. You started feeling ice cold in your chest.
The funny part was that sometimes it helped.
Seeing Natasha happy wasn't painful.
Sometimes, it was the best part of your day.
Her smiles with Carol were just as bright as they'd been with you.
You realised, after a few months, that Natasha didn't watch you guiltily anymore.
Now, her eyes skimmed over you completely.
You tried your best to focus on the missions.
There was no one who wanted you.
But, there were often people who needed you.
Your birthday was not a day that you’d been looking forward to. You were not naive enough to think you’d enjoy it this year.
Last year, Natasha had spent a quiet day with you.
She’d surprised you in the afternoon. She'd asked you to you lie on your back on the sofa, grinning mischievously as she lay right on top of you.
Then, she’d kissed you for every year you’d been in this world.
She’d asked if you were excited for next year.
For the chance to get one more kiss.
This year, no one remembered the date. There would be no surprises. You tried to keep focused on the assigned mission instead.
Nobody spoke to you on the flight over to the ship that had been hijacked. No one even looked at you.
You found yourself walking behind Natasha and Carol across the deck of the ship. Their hands were joined. Suddenly, you noticed the flash of metal, the ring on Natasha’s finger.
The new heaviness in your bones made it hard to keep going.
Maybe that’s why it happened.
The man you were fighting landed an unexpected blow. It knocked you sideways. Before you could stand up, another was standing over you. His foot pressed down on your chest so hard that you could feel your ribs breaking.
You heard a scream that wasn't your own. You followed the sound.
It was Carol. You followed her gaze, knowing what you’d see before you saw it.
Natasha was fighting at the very edge of the ship. The railing behind her had already been destroyed. She wasn't going to win.
For the first time, you extricated yourself from your fight faster than Carol could. You sprinted across the deck, not sure if you could breathe, and not caring either way.
The man had Natasha on the ground, his gun was cocked and aimed. You didn’t hesitate, you were in his blindspot but you only had one chance.
Natasha’s eyes were the last thing you saw.
You were happy with that.
You slammed into the man, tumbling together over the side of the ship.
It was Carol who retrieved your body out of the sea.
It was Natasha who sat with you in the back of the quinjet. Curled over your lifeless frame. She was crying, but she didn’t know why.
It took her nearly a day to accept that you were dead.
It was the doctor at the hospital who commented on the date. The exactness of your age for the death certificate.
The world fell apart for Natasha then.
There were so many memories that she never thought about if she could help it.
Moments with you that never stopped being perfect, even after you’d broken up. Even after she’d ruined everything.
Sometimes, good things were easier to ignore.
Your birthday had been one of those memories.
Maybe that’s why she hadn’t thought about it. Or maybe she’d just forgotten. That was harder to stomach.
They found one present for you back at the Compound. It was small, perfectly wrapped and awaiting your return.
Pepper had remembered.
Now, Natasha had a few more perfect memories of you.
Your hands, far too cold and still wet from the water.
A depression pamphlet, found crumpled in your gym locker.
The too-bright flowers at your funeral, given by people who'd forgotten about you when you were still alive.
They were the worst moments of her life, but they were also the last ones with you.
Taglist: @whofan88 @lostandsearching @causeitswhatjesuswouldfreakingdo @xxromanoffxx @b-5by5 @peggycarter-steverogers @iblameitonclint @natasha-danvers @reminiscingtonight @magicallymaximoff @mindofwesley @blackxwidowsxwife @wandaromanova @wandavixen @peabrain112 @theperfectlovestory @wellsayhelloaagin @owloftheshadows @wickedmuses @strangegardentaco @hallecarey1 @marvels-writings @alexzz13 @ic-4u @007giu @natashabelovas @iliketozoneout @chasethemoon @p0orbaby @tastetherambeau @rightwereyouleftme @wouldirunofftheworldsomeday @whataloadof
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natswidxw · 2 days ago
The drunk chick and the subway girl
Summary: How you met Natasha
Warnings: Alcohol consumption i guess ? Fluff, very very light angst at the end but that's pretty much it.
Word count: 924
A/N: So this is just something I short I wrote beacause I had to get it out and now I kinda like it so here we go (i ended up hating it and editing most of it but anyways)! I wrote a part two that I’m probably gonna post later.
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The first time you saw Natasha was Friday of winter. You were going to your sister’s birthday party, so you took the subway, to avoid traffic. And there, while you were waiting for your train, you saw her, the most beautiful woman you had ever seen, running, in heels and party dress, from five men twice her size with a smile plastered on her face. She didn’t see you in the subway, though, she didn’t have the time. But you saw her. You met your sister and had a great night. Except that maybe you had one too many drinks and didn’t remember any of it. When you woke up you looked around the place and not recognizing your apartment or your sister’s, you put your face in your hands and let out a long sigh. In whose apartment where you and what had you done.
“You don’t remember anything about last night do you?” you looked up to see a very amused redhead standing in the doorframe.
“No, I don’t” you mumbled, feeling the most embarrassed you had ever felt, still hiding your face in your hand. This wasn’t you, you never hooked up with strangers, you never even talked to strangers and you couldn’t even remember her name.
“I’m Natasha by the way.” She informed you as if she could read your thoughts, while putting a coffee and aspirin down on the nightstand next to you.
“Thank you” you said while taking the aspiring with a sip of coffee. After a while you remembered where you had seen her before.
“Wait, you’re the girl from the subway! Yesterday! I saw you running from five men in heels!” you exclaimed, nearly choking on your coffee.
“So, you’ve said, yes, it was me” she confirmed sitting down next to you on her bed. She was only wearing an underwear and an overside shirt and you were too. You realized you didn’t remember anything about last night including how you got changed.
“Okay I’m sorry Natasha, you seem really nice but I don’t remember anything about last night once I got to the bar with my sister and her friends so how did I end up in a shirt that’s not mine, in the apartment of someone I saw in the subway once?”
“We actually met at the bar Y/n, you came to explain the subway thing, you were already a few drinks in and we started flirting, fast forward we hooked up in the bathroom and I took you back to my place, but you were way too drunk to consent, so we didn’t have sex. You kept trying to prove that you weren’t too drunk. And again, fast forward you owe me a new chair. You refused to sleep but sobered up towards the end and we had a really nice chat for quite a while. Then we went to sleep, I gave you a shirt so you could change and that’s it. I’m surprised you don’t remember the last part because you weren’t so drunk anymore.” She explained and you felt so relived, you hadn’t slept with a complete stranger, and now that she mentioned it you did remember bits of the conversation, but you did break her chair and made a fool of yourself.
“Oh god, I’m sorry, you spent all night babysitting a drunk chick that you don’t know!Thank you so much for it you really didn’t have to, I’m so sorry.” you said while hiding your head under the covers hoping it would make you disappear.
“Hey Y/N, it’s okay. You actually handled yourself pretty well considering how drunk you were and I loved talking with half sober half drunk you. I actually had a good time. You’re really funny when you’re drunk” She told you genuinely. At her words you slowly poked your head out of the covers and looked her in the eyes. She was fidgeting with the hem of her shirt and avoiding your gaze as if she was nervous. Feeling a little bit at ease that she was as nervous as you were you asked her if she’d like to go on a lunch date with you right now and she agreed.
That lunch went so well that it turned into the two of you spending the entire weekend together. And the weekend after that, and the weekend after that… until two years later, Natasha asked you to marry her, at the same train station you had seen her run away from the 5 men, on the exact same day. Some people said proposing in a train station was lame, but to you and her, it was the most perfect way to propose. If you hadn’t seen her in that subway station, you probably wouldn’t have talked to her in the bar, she wouldn’t have brought you back to her place, and you would have never dated the love of your life.
You wanted to get married in the fall and she wanted to do it in the summer, you compromised and settled for September, the leaves were starting to be yellow, but the chill hair wasn’t really settling in yet and everything felt like magic. Your whole relationship felt like magic. You were barely 21 and had just graduated college, when you met her, she was 26 and had recently moved in from Russia. You didn’t know life without her, she didn’t know life without you. So, what were you supposed to do ten years later, once the magic was gone?
Read part two here
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nataliaromanova-widow · 2 days ago
Father's Girlfriend – I
Pairings: Bruce Banner x Daughter!reader, Natasha Romanoff x Bruce Banner, Natasha Romanoff x Fem!reader.
Warnings: A little bit of angst, death, cancer.
Word count: 1.3k
Summary: Your mother had never told you who your biological father was. After her death, things start changing for you and for your father who had only come to find out about your existence now.
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Masterlist | Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV
You hadn't known where your mother wanted to get with this.
After years hiding things from you, being secretive about everything. You knew she had been sick.
She was your all but you felt lost. She was lost and you couldn't help her solely because of the fact she couldn't be helped.
She was dealing with her own battles, there was no space for you.
Something was weirder about her, she started mentioning you father one day, telling you all about him. She had never even mentioned his existence, even after you asked her to when you were a child.
She was different, eyes wide with excitement as she told you how they met; apparently he was a very shy and smart 18 year old, they had met in high school and after being paired up together for a project, things happened and he knocked her up. Cliché.
It was the first time hearing about it, you had thought all these absurd things about your father throughout the years; maybe he was some kind of rapist, a deadbeat, anything... but the way she had told you the story made it seem like he a nice young man but she was afraid and ended up leaving her hometown. You wondered if you father knew about your existence.
You had wanted to meet him, to ask him all the kinds of questions. Your mother wouldn't give you any more information, though. You were fine with that.
Weeks, months passed by, and your mother's condition only degraded, you were hopeless.
She started acting weirder and weirder, paranoid as ever.
She had to be at the hospital everyday now because of chemo, wouldn't even leave you a glance, wouldn't eat. She became skinnier. There was nothing you could do.
Bags under her eyes, paler face, weak body. She'd whisper to herself about every little thing she was going to do before she did, even the more futile.
You knew it was terminal and you couldn't take it anymore, so you started an unconscious habit: every night after she'd go to sleep, you'd hold her hand while you sobbed silently.
You were losing your mother.
It was crazy to you the way that she was gone in a period of three months after discovering her cancer. You had time to ponder through it at the funeral. You had everything and now you had nothing.
You had gotten a call one day from an unknown number after your mother's death, but you were too sad, too mad, too broken. You never picked up.
Your phone wouldn't stop ringing, and on the second try, you turned on the vibrate mode on it, mind still fresh from your mother's casket. The same number would call you everyday, but you didn't leave your bed anymore, let alone pick up the phone.
On the seventh day, it called you again one morning while you stared at the ceiling once again, you grabbed your phone in rage and threw it over the balcony, letting out a groan at the way you were being interrupted, instantly regretting it. You guess your emotions were all over the place lately.
Just a little over an hour later, still tossing in your sleep, you let out a huff as you hear a desperate knock on your door.
‘What do you want?! Who is it?’
Looking at the peephole, you find a sight you never thought you'd see standing over your doorstep, a very anxious—
‘...Robert. Bruce. Banner. Robert Bruce. I mean–' You heard the voice through the door, seemingly weak and insecure. You had known he was very different from the Hulk from the very first beginning.
Opening the door open, you reply in shock.
'Bruce Banner. You're the Bruce Banner.'
‘I tried calling you beforehand, but I don't know what happened, maybe I dialed a wrong number.’
‘No. Yeah. I... I threw my phone over the balcony. Long story.’
‘Oh, right. Can I come in?’
You knew he could feel your hesitancy the way your eyes trailed down to the floor not meeting his.
‘It's okay if we talk out here.’
‘No, I'm sorry. You can come in, it's just... the whole place is a mess.’
You leaned back so Bruce could walk inside.
He stood in the living room looking as awkward as ever. His eyes looking around at every inch of your house, even the scattered pictures of your mom all over the place.
‘I'm sorry about your mother.’ He said finally. Your hands wavering to the sofa motioning for him to sit down as you did the same.
‘Oh. Thanks, man.’ You were confused on how he knew about your mother. She never even mentioned him.
‘We were good friends back in the day. She was a wonderful, strong woman.’ He gives you a nonchalant smile as if he was reminiscing. That explains it.
‘What did you come here for?’ You had gone straight to the point. You hated small talk.
His smile dropped and he engorged.
‘Your mother, before she died, she sent me to take care of you. I...’ He stuttered in nervousness. You placed your hand on his palm for comfort. If they were friends in the past, that means your mother dying must've been hurtful to him as well, you knew he needed it, because you needed it too.
‘She told me something shocking. I need to find out if it's true.’
‘Banner, my mother was never one to lie. She's done all kinds of shit while living, but lying wasn't one of them.’ Remembering the times she loved you and protected you. You had tears threatening to fall, but you wouldn't let them.
‘I know, but I just need to know.’
‘What is it?’. You frowned waiting on him to finally speak.
‘She told me... she told me I might be your father.’
Widening your eyes in shock, you let out a scoff. Getting up from your seat. Maybe that's why she didn't want you to know who your father was.
You had to come up with a decision. Find out if he was your father and let him become a part of your life or just say no and move on. You were over 18 now, it was your decision, not his. But your mother had made your existence to him known. You could only imagine it had a reason behind it.
‘Let's find out.’
Bruce told you to pack your things then, he wanted to take you where we worked, you could only assume it was at the Avengers lab.
You only nodded. You didn't know why you trusted him so easily, might have something to do with the fact that he was an Avenger.
You grabbed all your things, even the unnecessary ones. You kept your mother's pictures on top of your clothes before closing the bag, looking at them had become an everyday thing for you.
This was going to be the most impulsive decision you'd ever make in your life. Well, right before joining your middle school band, but that's a whole other story.
You entered his car, it smelled just like him. You could feel the awkwardness radiating from him, maybe he felt it too by the way he once again started the small talk on the way to the Avengers Tower.
You let out a chuckle, telling him about stories you had from middle school. You were a goof, and he laughed at every single one of them.
‘I think you're going to like Natasha.’
‘Black Widow, right?’
‘Yes. She's my girlfriend.’
You snorted at that. He looked over at you for a second, a playful smile planted on his face.
‘What? You don't believe me?’
‘No, man. It's just... I didn't think she was into nerds.’ You joked and he gasped. Your laugh prominent at the sound. It's probably the most fun you ever had after your mother's passing.
‘I'm kidding. She seems cool and she's a badass. Plus she's hot. So... good for you.’
‘Yeah. Thanks.’ He then focused on the road with a small smile. You closed your eyes in weariness. Eyes drifting off slowly.
You felt a nudge on your shoulder, you opened your eyes, looking around.
‘Wake up, kid. We're here.’
You got out of the car, waiting for Bruce to give you the next introductions as you yawned.
‘I'll take you to you room so you can rest very soon. Tomorrow we'll deal with that whole thing we talked about.’
Your eyes never stopped looking around, finding the entrance of the tower, you're met with the sight of Bruce's girlfriend, Natasha, walking over.
You looked behind you at Bruce and when he noticed the beauty, his face beamed with happiness.
‘There you are. I imagine it all went well.’ Natasha let out, coming to hug Bruce. Turning to you right after, offering her best smile.
‘It did. This is Y/N. Y/N, this is Natasha. Natasha Romanoff.’
You didn't miss the way her eyes went up and down over your body. You imitated her smirk.
‘Nice to meet you, Natasha. Natasha Romanoff.’ You offered your hand for her to shake, a chuckle leaving her lips at the way you said her name.
‘Nice to meet you too.’
She licked her lips, then. Her gaze went quickly to your lips and then your eyes. She knew you had noticed by the way her smirk became a falsely innocent one.
You had barely met Natasha Romanoff and she was already the death of you.
@diaryoflife @tashakink @when-wolves-howl @fayhar
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natsfirecat · 4 hours ago
Hello! I was wondering if I could request a Natasha x reader fic where reader has a really hard time remembering simple things and they have always been yelled at for it. Reader forgets to do something very simple before Nat gets home from work and reader gets scared that Nat will yell at her also. This is really specific and if you’re not comfortable writing this please don’t even worry about it. :) 
Simple Snowflakes
pairing: Natasha Romanoff x reader
word count: 1.3k
warnings: panic attack, lmk if i need to add any more!
You were laying in bed, flipping through channels on the TV as you tossed a few pieces of popcorn in your mouth.
You heard your phone chime, so you paused the movie to check your texts.
It was your mother, telling you that she'd be home in 10 minutes.
Just as you were about to get back to the movie, you saw one of the texts just above it.
Don't forget to take the chicken out of the freezer!
Your heart dropped as panic filled your chest; you had completely forgotten.
You swung your legs over the bed, running through the halls as fast as you could.
When you got to the bottom of the steps, your heart was racing. Your eyes were still wide as you fan to the freezer, taking the chicken out.
"No, no, no, no," you muttered, seeing that there was still frost on it.
You checked your phone again, finally remembering when you got the text.
It was just after she left this morning, and you were watching a movie in your room. You told yourself you'd do it after you finished the movie... and that was four movies ago and you had forgotten all about it.
So now, you sat on the couch in the living room, dreading your mother's return. You fiddled with your fingers, desperately trying to shift your thoughts to something other than the frozen chicken.
You checked your phone again, seeing that she was almost here.
You grabbed a nearby pillow, pulling it to your chest and squeezing it tightly.
This wasn't going to go well.
When you heard the door opening, you sat straight up, forcing a smile.
You heard her footsteps coming from behind you, so she had to be in the kitchen now.
You kept your focus forward, trying to ignore the overwhelming anxiety building up.
"Y/N..." your mother began. "Why is the chicken still frozen?"
You whipped around, your eyes wide with guilt. She knew. You knew she knew.
"You forgot to take it out, didn't you?"
You shifted your gaze to the floor, not wanting to answer her question.
She scoffed, letting out a sarcastic laugh.
"You always forget!" She said, pacing around. "I tell you before I leave, I text you while I'm out, and yet you can't remember one simple thing!"
"I'm sorry..." you muttered at a whisper.
She scoffed again.
"If you were really sorry, you'd put more effort in."
You sighed, feeling tears building up in your eyes.
She was right, you should've remembered.
Throughout the rest of your teenage years and even leading into adulthood, your memory didn't get much better.
Now, you were dating an Avenger.
You had been with Natasha for the past six months, and you hadn't told her about your poor memory.
Although, if it wasn't for your poor memory you wouldn't be together in the first place.
You were supposed to go to a meeting that day, but you had completely forgotten. You only remembered because you got a text asking how far out you were.
So, you ran out the door, desperate to make it on time.
In fact, you were so desperate that you weren't really paying attention to where you were going.
So as you ran across the street (without even checking if you could) you ended up running right into someone else.
You let out a growl of frustration. You locked eyes with her, seeing she was just as frustrated. But once she saw the look in your eyes, her gaze softened.
"Are you okay?" She asked.
"I will be," you replied, knowing you needed to make it there on time.
So without another word, you kept walking forward.
Of course, you didn't know that wouldn't be the last time you saw Natasha. You also didn't know that those were the same green eyes you would fall in love with.
Since you hadn't told her about your consistently poor memory, you just set several reminders for most things, and hoped for the best. You didn't want her to act like your mom did with your memory. And so far, it was working.
Currently, she was on a mission and was supposed to be coming back today.
You were sitting on the couch, your legs curled up by your sides You were holding a mug filled with hot chocolate, as you snuggled beneath a blanket.
The snow fell softly, piling up outside your window as you took another sip of hot chocolate. The whipped cream was beginning to melt, making it taste even sweeter.
You smiled, leaning back against the couch as you pulled the blanket up higher.
Just as you were about to put something on, you heard the familiar sound of the front door opening.
Coming in, covered in snow, was your girlfriend.
You hopped off the couch, quickly setting your hot chocolate down on the coffee table so you could run and meet her.
As you ran into her arms, you felt the wet snow on your own skin as you leaned into her embrace.
She smiled, kissing the top of your head.
"I missed you, Natty," you mumbled against her.
"I missed you too, detka,"
She opened her eyes, still holding you against her.
You gently brought your lips to her neck, feeling the cold on her skin.
As you kept your lips there, you felt the vibrations as she spoke.
"Is that Yelena's book?" She asked, noticing the book on the table.
Your heart dropped. You didn't even remember her book was still here.
But now that Natasha pointed it out to you, it all came back.
Yelena had been wanting this book for her birthday, so Natasha got it at the bookstore. But then she found out she got the wrong book in the series, and needed to return it so she could get the right one.
She had asked you to return it while she was gone, and you had forgotten.
You pulled back from her, crossing your arms as tears came to your eyes. You sat back on the couch, holding the pillow close as panic spread throughout your body.
Natasha's eyes widened in confusion, so she sat down next to you.
She reached her arm out to your shoulder, but you flinched back.
"Detka, what's wrong?" She asked, genuinely confused.
"I forgot to return it," you said with tears in your eyes. "And now it's probably passed the date you can return it, and you're gonna yell at me 'cause I didn't remember,"
Her heart dropped when she heard the genuine fear in your voice.
"Hey," she said softly, putting her hand on your knee. She ran her thumb back and forth, attempting to comfort you. "I'm not gonna yell at you. I'm not sure why you'd even think that,"
You looked at her through your blurry vision, wiping your eyes.
"My mom always yelled at me when I forgot simple things. I've tried to get better at remembering, but sometimes I just forget,"
She brought her other hand to your own, squeezing it gently.
"It's not a big deal, love," she told you. "I'm not mad. People forget things and that's okay."
You sniffled, leaning into her side.
"I promise. I could never be mad at you for something like that,"
You let out a sigh of relief, keeping your head on her shoulder.
It was okay. With Natasha, you were okay.
taglist: @lyak12 @thewidowsghost @murderisthesolution @zombies1ayea @plasticl0ve @romanoffscottage @atlas-nex @plasticnacho @ria900 @youreatotalposer @readings-stuff @nats-dreamland @chiyongberry @xxromanoffxx @milfloverslut
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clueless-sapphic · 6 hours ago
Hey ! Hope you had great holidays !
I hope its okay for you to write this ask if not just dont do it its okay.
Um I saw a tiktok with Natasha x reader (platonic) where Nat just yell at the reader in front of her family and the team telling them how worthless they are because and all for some reason (that you can choose). Then the reader lower her head with tears in her eyes say to Nat "Your a bad friend" and there just a silence and Nat just stop breathing before the reader go away. And Nat just let a tear fall because she didnt think she was bad friend. And everyone in the room is so shocked by Nat roughless and by the reader answers because the reader never been mean to anyone whatever they say to her. You can do an happy ending or not as you want. I was in a mood for an angst so whatever end you do will be good to me.
Thanks have a good day !
You’re a bad friend
Natasha Romanoff x reader (platonic)
This is my last fic so consider it a goodbye present <3
a/n I hope your holidays were great too! I’ve actually watched the show this scene is from, it’s great :)
warnings: crying, fighting, angst with happy ending
An array of colours lay around you, creating a bright mess on your bed. Although, you didn’t seem to care as you took out more shades of thread from your box of them. You grinned in triumph when you finally found the colour you had been searching for.
You narrowed your eyes into a squint as you carefully held the thread with two fingers. Slowly, you moved until the thin, yellow strand fell through the thin slit in the needle. A relieved smile broke out on your face as you continued your embroidery on the pocket of the thin vest on your lap.
For a while, Natasha had been distressed. She would stay up really late at night pacing in her room and nervously tugging on her hair and glancing at her phone every few moments. Her snarky comments around the compound had increased, probably because of her lack of sleep. The two of you had even started spending less time together and you missed her.
Even though she wouldn’t admit it, you knew it was because she was worrying about Yelena, the blonde had seemingly disappeared over the past week. She hasn’t replied to the countless texts Natasha sent her and all of her calls went straight to voicemail.
So you decided you would do something special for Natasha to make her feel better, you had been working on it for hours on end. On each of the pockets of the vest you had embroidered cute things that reminded you of Yelena, you hoped Natasha would like it.
“What are you doing?” the voice of a certain redhead asked
Her presence sent you into a slight panic as you jerked your hand away from the piece of clothing. It was like ice cold water washed over you making your body go rigid as the deafening sound of fabric tearing resounded across the room. A rip ran along the seams of the clothing and not a small one. The feeling of impending doom sprung in your chest making it feel tight like it was closing in on you. Everything suddenly felt suffocating, like the air was curling around your throat and choking you, that would explain your inability to speak, to start apologising.
Natasha’s stare was fixed onto your trembling form and you dreaded to see the look on her face. Would she look disappointed, like you had only made the world around her crumble more? Or would she be furious, glaring at you with a raging fire in her eyes?
Slowly, you lifted your head and through your blurry vision you could see the tight clench in her jaw and the annoyance shining clear as day on her face. You had fucked up.
“What did you do?” she asked slowly, punctuating each word clearly.
“I- I was- I was trying to do something special for you”
“Of course you were” she muttered, running her hands through her hair “But you completely ruined it”
“I- I’m sorry, i didn’t mean to. I can fix it”
“You didn’t mean to, but you did because you always ruin everything, that’s just what you do” she snarled
You looked at her wide eyed, Natasha had never shouted at you before.
“All you ever do is create more problems for me. Why would you even bother?”
“Because I love you” you whispered as tears began to sting at your eyes.
Nonetheless, Natasha continued talking, paying your words no mind, like she was stuck in a trance. You were just a means for her to channel all her pent up anger and frustration into. Like a pillow she could keep punching over and over until she finally felt a sense of peace take over her body.
“I mean, you’re y/n, you never really think before you do anything and all you ever do is get in my way. How could you possibly be this worthless?”
Worthless. You’d heard the words before, but it had never stung so much because you didn’t think you would ever hear them from Natasha. From your best friend. The one who had risked her life on a mission once just to save you.
You expected Natasha to continue spitting out insults at you so you were shocked to see her snap her mouth shut and furrow her brows.
“What? Why are you looking at me like that?”
You didn’t realise you had been looking at her a certain way, all you knew was that you probably looked as discouraged as you felt.
“You’re a bad friend” you sobbed, ducking your head and wiping the tears that fell from your eyes
The words stumbled from your mouth before you could stop them. The silence in the room felt more overwhelming than the shouting as the words hung between the two of you, heavy and uncomfortable. You looked up at her to see that the annoyance on her face had faded to a look you couldn’t decipher. Regret bubbled in your stomach and you left the room unable to handle the flurry of emotions you were feeling.
Natasha watched as you walked out and shut the door quietly behind you, unable to do anything else. Her body felt stiff as your words rang in her brain on repeat. She scrunched her eyes shut as she tugged on her hair wanting the words to drown out. But all she felt was a dull throbbing in her head that only added to the headache from the repetitive chant of words in her mind.
“You’re a bad friend”
The words were like a taunt. She angrily swiped at the lone tear that trickled down her pale skin. Was she really a bad friend? Perhaps it was foolish to ask that question when she had yelled at you for 5 minutes while you sat there in silence. Recently, she had been snappier towards you and all you did was repay her with more kindness. She really had been a bad friend.
She looked down in shame, the bright flash of colours catching her eye in the process. Her eyes finally took in the sight of your room. Threads of every colour she could think of lay in a small pile on the bed and in the centre was the vest. It was the only thing she had from Yelena.
Her hands picked it up, fingers running over the gentle ridges from the embroidery. She smiled softly when she saw two beer bottles on a pocket. That night she went drinking with Yelena had been one of the best in her life. Then her eyes flickered over to the small purple flower you had sewn, those were her favourite flowers.
Tears pricked at her eyes as she looked at everything you had added to the vest, she really owed you an apology. She fell back on the bed and buried her face in her hands, hopefully you would be back soon. The quicker you did, the quicker she could make things right.
The gentle thud of your footsteps alerted Natasha to your presence and she snapped her head up. Your face was red and splotchy and her heart clenched, she hated seeing you upset. When you noticed Natasha waited for you a look of guilt washed over your features.
“I’m really sorry” you blurted
“Why are you apologising?”
“Because I ruined Yelena’s vest” you mumbled, avoiding her gaze out of shame.
The older girl moved closer so she could sit at the edge of the bed. She took your hand in hers so she could pull you down to sit next to her and her thumb rubbed gentle circles on the back of it.
“You only made it better” she murmured “I’m sorry i yelled at you”
“It’s okay”
Her eyebrows shifted downwards into a furrow as she spoke “You need to stop forgiving people so easily”
“You want me to be mad at you?” you asked with genuine confusion
“No, but you should be” she mumbled
You hugged her and she almost fell back on the bed from the force of it.
“It’s not your fault, you were just upset”
She stiffened before running her hands up and down your back.
“I don’t deserve you” she whispered
“I don’t care” you replied
She sighed before tightening the hug. Silence fell over the room, but it wasn’t overwhelming this time. It was like falling into bed after a long day of work. It was comforting.
“Do you think you could fix it, the tear in the vest?” Natasha asked tentatively
“Of course i can” you replied, snuggling further into Natasha’s hold.
tagging: @winters-witch-bitch @evilcr0ne @thebijesus @suckerfornatstits @emilyprentisslittlewhore @idkwhygregg @kassxndre happy reading <3
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romanoffscottage · 2 days ago
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evermore x natasha romanoff moodboard
request a moodboard
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kassxndre · 2 days ago
𝐓𝐨𝐨 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 (𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐞)
Natasha Romanoff x Reader
Based on the song “Trop beau” by Lomepal
ᴀ/ɴ: Yes, I already wrote something based on this song. Yes, I completely changed the story. And yes, it’s better. Good reading 💙
ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ | ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀ ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ
sᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: No such strong passion can end up in a calm and serene way. Natasha and you soon realized it when the ending of your relationship turned to be a huge chaos.
ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs: angst 😌
ᴡᴏʀᴅs ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 2,4k
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You haven’t seen such a quiet night in a long time. These last months had all been composed for Natasha and you of repeated arguments, unfounded reproaches and morbid jealousy. Your relationship had slowly deteriorated to the point where today you weren’t sure there was anything left to save. Yet tonight, between the both of you, it was calm, or you thought so.
Standing in the corner of the room, engaged in conversation with important people and your brother Tony, you kept a discreet eye on Natasha. She was a few meters away, near a patio door opening onto the terrace, trying as best she could to avoid all the boring conversations that kind of evening offered. At times, she gave you meaningful looks but you didn’t react. She knew as much as you about the current state of your relationship. However, she took more pains than you to let herself believe that things weren’t so bad. Unfortunately, the rest of the evening was going to prove her wrong, once again.
After other conversations, each more boring than the other, with investors with well-filled wallets, you were finally able to extricate yourself to get some fresh air. So you headed to the terrace without thinking that you would surely find Natasha there. It wasn’t until you slid the patio door slightly and met her somewhat annoyed gaze that you realized she was there.
“I guess it wasn’t me you came for,” Natasha said, a cigarette in her hand and her eyes once again fixed on the horizon.
You rubbed the back of your neck lightly before replying, “Actually, I needed to get some air.”
“I imagine,” Natasha breathed, “With all these important people hanging around you since the start of the evening, you must feel suffocated.”
You frowned slightly, “Are you blaming me there?”
You didn’t want it to happen again. You were tired of always having to justify yourself on the least of your acts without stopping under the pretext that such and such a thing did not please Natasha. You were tired of these incessant arguments.
“No,” Natasha replied, “It’s an observation.”
You rolled your eyes, without answering her. You didn’t want another fight. Then a heavy silence fell between you and you watched Natasha smoke cigarettes after cigarettes. Then came the first crack.
“It must be so easy for you,” Natasha sighed with a hint of malice in her voice.
You turned to her, curiously.
“You are a Stark,” Natasha clarified, “You were born with a silver spoon in your mouth. You have always had what you wanted and you will surely never lack for anything.”
You didn’t answer, instead you kept your gaze fixed on Natasha who had her back to you.
“I didn’t have that chance,” Natasha resumed, “I’m sorry for not satisfying you, for not being enough.”
This sentence had the effect of an electric shock for you. Until then you didn’t know that Natasha felt this, that she felt like she was insufficient for you. It had never been the case and you thought she knew it. In your eyes, she had always been enough and she always would be. You loved her for her, for who she was deep inside, not for anything else. Even if sometimes, love is not enough.
Natasha stubbed out her cigarette before walking back to you. Her tears flowed silently, you could still hear the voices of the people inside. Her eyes were red with tears. You felt a pang in your heart.
“We’d even hurt each other with zero words, huh?” she asked before brushing past you on her way to the patio door.
She gave you one last look and then went inside. You sighed. The evening was going to be long.
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More than an hour had passed since your conversation with Natasha and you had resumed the course of the evening as if all was well. Obviously, you knew full well that all was not well between you but you considered that the others did not have to know it. After all, it was your story, it had to stay between you. But that was without taking into account Natasha’s drunkenness and her ability to spread out your whole life in front of everyone, without embarrassment.
You were chatting with guests when Wanda grabbed you by the arm to lead you a little further. She wanted to speak quietly. Or rather, she wanted to yell at you quietly.
“You disgust me (Y/n),” swung the witch without you understanding a thing, “And then you dare to say that you assume all your mistakes? You have no shame!”
You frowned, confused, “What are you talking about Wanda?”
“What am I talking about?!” she exclaimed with a dry laugh, “Well, what you put Natasha through!”
“Be more specific.”
“She told me everything, everything! And it’s not pretty! The insults, the manipulations, the lies... She told even told me that you were a real devil with her!”
“She told you that?” you asked calmly as you already felt your blood boil with anger.
“Yeah,” Wanda confirmed, “I don’t even know why she’s staying with you.”
You looked at Wanda with eyes darkened with disappointment and anger, “I’ll tell you why she’s staying.”
Wanda cocked her head slightly to the side, waiting for your response.
“Money,” you said before walking away to end this conversation.
You were at your wit’s end. Okay, right now between Natasha and you it was not mad love but that she came to lie openly to attract sympathy and pity from people? You couldn’t tolerate it. She dared drag your name through the mud on the sole pretext that, like you, she was suffering from the decline of your relationship. That didn’t give her the right to spread such lies. This time, she had crossed a point of no return.
You were so pissed off about this story that you had to drag yourself out of the party for a moment to calm down. Of course, like a worried big brother, Tony had followed you to find out what was going on.
“(Y/n)? You’re okay?” he asked worriedly.
You took the time to take a deep breath before turning to your brother.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” you replied,“It’s just Natasha. She starts lying by telling everyone that I behaved like a real bitch with her.”
Tony seemed surprised by your words.
“Why would she do that?” he asked.
“To let off steam, quite simply. It’s to believe that this is the only way she has found not to feel a bit responsible for the chaos between us.”
Tony watched you for a long time before hugging you. Right away he knew you needed Tony the brother, not Tony the billionaire.
“Are you going to last the rest of the evening?” he asked, breaking his embrace.
“I don’t know but at this rate we are not likely to last long.”
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Of course, a few quarter of an hour later, what had to happen happened. You were leaning on the bar, ordering a drink when Natasha threw herself on you. She had no intention of attacking you, no, but she was so drunk that when she saw you she decided to throw herself on your neck. However, you were still on edge and her behavior only fueled the fire. So, tired of this whole situation, you pushed Natasha away. Apparently, she had a hard time understanding.
“What’s the matter?” the redhead asked in confusion.
“You’re asking me what’s the matter? Are you kidding or what?”
Your voice was filled with anger and your tone was dry. You weren’t meant to mince words.
“I don’t understand…”
“Oh you don’t understand? I’ll explain,” you said dryly, “I really hope your little lies have eased your conscience because believe me, we’ve come to the end with this.”
“Wait,” Natasha sighed, “What I said is not so serious. Everyone will have forgotten tomorrow.”
“Not so serious? You even compared me to Lucifer Natasha!” you replied, “Now you drink and want me? No, but you gotta be kidding me!”
Again you pushed the redhead away and then walked away with your glass in your hand so you wouldn’t have to look at her again for the night. You were mixed between love and hate. You didn’t know what to do or what to feel. Everything was too confusing tonight.
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You were sitting at a table in a secluded corner when Steve joined you.
“Can I sit?” he asked and you nodded.
You didn’t have the heart to discuss, but you knew Steve well enough to know that he didn’t come and sit at your table just to pass the time in silence.
“How are you doing?“
“Alright no,” you sighed, “We’re not going to start this topic.”
“Okay,” the blond agreed, “At least tell me what you’re thinking.”
You sighed, “I don’t know. I would like the evening to end so that I can go to sleep.”
Steve cracked a small smile, “I understand.”
You gave him a polite smile before sighing again.
“Don’t worry, it’ll work out,” the blonde said, smiling sweetly at you.
“I haven’t counted on that for a long time,” you replied.
Steve gave you a questioning look, eager to understand where you were going with that. You took a sip of your drink before setting your glass down and then turning your gaze to Steve.
“I already know what distance entails,” you explained, “Either it’s war for 10 years without a break, or I’ll break up with her and tell her...”
You paused then spoke again, as if speaking directly to Natasha, “Keep smiling, nothing matters as long as we have a second of memory left in our heads. Our two bodies could die, I have already mourned. Now get away from me…”
“Before you change your mind,” Steve interrupted you.
You stared at him for a moment before sighing and looking down at your drink. You were lost. You were angry but you were lost. Because you still loved her, despite everything.
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Two days later, you found yourself in your room with Natasha. Subject to the same emotions as the previous days but still inhabited by this same love for the redhead, you still succumbed to her charms. Yet something was different, something was broken. You have never been so close to the end. And if you would never admit that some of your own emotions frightened you, you still found yourself running away from the sad reality. Everything was too damaged to be repaired. Natasha knew that as well as you. Maybe that was why she needed comfort so much.
“Baby, hold me tight so I forget it’s chaos,” Natasha begged, “Around us it’s chaos.”
You hugged Natasha silently. Maybe for the last time. Then after a few minutes you broke your embrace.
“Look at us, fate is not ashamed, the gods are not ashamed,” you said sadly, “We tried our best but it’s never enough.”
“I messed it up,” Natasha said, lowering her head, “This year is still in the works, the feelings and the dreams we were building.”
“Don’t say that...”
She lifted her head to look at you, “Can we come back in January? I so want to start all over again.”
Her gaze went through your body like a long needle. The green of her eyes shot you like a violent laser. Your thoughts raced in seconds, leaving your mind clouded.
“There is nothing to do again,” you said softly, “We cannot save what is already dead.”
“Maybe we can change things…”
You wiped away your tears with the back of your sleeve, “The two of us in the same car, we will always rush towards death. Look at us, we hate each other so much that we make love again.”
“We love each other, it’s stronger than us.”
“Because it’s like drugs, we have enough to get high. That doesn’t mean it’s healthy or good.”
Her eyes searched you and in the glowing green you could read her silent cries for help. She looked at you with all the love she still has for you, like a confidence. The problem is, it reminded you why you love her. You relived the beginning, the first weeks and you found a hint of hope. But all is in vain.
“We could start from zero,” Natasha suggested, “And take the first plane to the other side of the world, promise ourselves the best and get through it all.”
You thought about it for a moment before coming back to reality. There is nothing left to save, you know that.
“We could but it’s crazy, you know that as well as I do,” you replied.
Thereupon, heavy tears began to flow down the cheeks of the redhead. You stifled your sobs so as not to burst into tears. At least one of you had to stay strong.
“So… It’s over?” Natasha asked, silently crying.
You nodded and more painful tears formed in the redhead’s eyes. It broke your heart. You saw her smile crack and you prayed that one day she could love again. You also prayed that you could love again.
When Natasha turned to wipe away her tears and regain control, you took a deep breath. You had to take out everything you had on your heart.
“Keep smiling, nothing is serious as long as we have a second of memory left in our mind,” you confided, “Both of our bodies could die, you know, I have already mourned.”
Natasha listened to you, her jaw clenched. Now everything was real. It was the end. The end of you. The end of this story that meant so much to him. Maybe even the end of the world too. Either way, it was the end of her world.
“Now get away from me,” you whispered, a tear hidden in your eye.
Natasha looked at you for a moment, her eyes watery, then she nodded. Your story could never have ended in calm and tenderness. Everything had always been too strong between you. The redhead started to walk away towards the door before turning to speak one last time.
“I hate you like that line that says ‘it was too good to be true’.”
This time it was truly over.
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5-puthyyy · a day ago
Crusher Series Masterlist
Series Link
Welcome! I've created a masterlist for my series following a Super-Soldier!Reader (aka Crusher) on her quest for love, redemption, and freedom. Hopefully this masterlist will make it easier to follow! I advise you start from the first instalment otherwise the second and the ones to come - that I'm planning to write, I promise - will not make sense. I'll be adding/updating it with every new instalment whenever I begin one! Everyone is welcome and I always try to respond to every comment on my AO3! If you decide to stay, enjoy the ride 😎
Natasha Romanoff x Super-Soldier!Reader
Wanda Maximoff x Super-Soldier!Reader
Love Triangle
HYDRA Captivity/Torture
Graphic Descriptions (Smut, Violence, Murder)
Heavy Angst
Instalment One - The Rushmans (Click Here For Link) - STATUS = COMPLETE
'The Rushmans' Summary
Life as a Super-Soldier hasn’t been easy to say the least; while living for over a century has its perks, overcoming the psychological torture you experienced was the hardest thing you’ve ever had to endure. That is, until you fell for Natasha Romanoff. Or Wanda Maximoff. Maybe both. Definitely both.
Your continuous pining over Natasha has you failing mission after mission, while your new-found feelings for Wanda has you questioning years of friendship. Beyond desperate for an escape, you seek out help, but Maria has other plans for you; six months of endless torture with the one woman you can’t have. Little did you know the adventures New Orleans has in store for you…
Instalment Two - Die For You (Click Here For Link) - STATUS = IN PROGRESS
'Die For You' Summary
Life as Super-Soldier hasn’t been easy to say the least. But life as Natasha Romanoff’s partner-on-the-run? It has its perks in the form of early runs, morning coffees, and nights spent with each other’s names on the other’s lips. That is, until a masked figure crashes into your car, into your life, forcing you out of your hidden home and back into heroism.
Is peace something you will ever have? Is it something you deserve? Will your moment of tranquility be just that; a fleeting, distance memory of a utopian time in your life? The choice is Natasha’s to make…will it be you, or war?
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8plasma · a day ago
warnings: talks of alcoholism and trauma
note: this is a vent fic coming from personal experience so yeah :p
+ two fics one day? crazyyy
ty moli for proofreading ‹3 no tags because it might be a sensitive topic </3
. . .
you were never fond of parties. they were always too loud, too crowded, too unpredictable – especially when there was a large amount of alcohol involved. it wasn’t so much that people were drinking, but how they began to act after drinking too much.
if it were up to you, you would’ve been locked in your room watching tv for the rest of the night, but tony harassed you all week about coming to the party until you finally agreed.
the music was loud, almost everyone was drunk, and you were far from having any kind of fun. you felt awkward, out of place. so instead of trying to socialize, you found yourself standing at the back of the room with a cup of water in your hands.
memories of your mother drunk and unstable were reeling over and over again in your mind. no matter how much you tried to focus on something else, teenage trauma began to seep through into your thought process.
all of a sudden you remembered how you were forced to be the parent instead of the child, how you had to fend for yourself a great deal of time, the selfishness of your mother every time she chose to drink instead of being sober enough to protect you.
“y/n?” natasha’s voice snapped you from your thoughts and you quickly plastered a smile on your face.
“hello nat.”
“you alright?” she asked curiously.
“yeah, of course i am. i’m at a party hosted by tony stark himself.” natasha giggled, taking a sip of her drink.
“they can be a little much at times.”
you nodded in agreement. the two of you stood in silence before you decided to leave.
“well i’m a little tired, so i’m off to bed. i’ll see you tomorrow.”
it was clear you were lying, but natasha didn’t want to push the matter. so she figured she’d wait up and keep an unknowing eye on you.
“good night y/n.”
. . .
you found yourself surrounded by the crisp new york wind on the roof of the tower. everything felt more at peace in contrast to the party. nothing was too loud, you had a nice view of the city, and you were alone. it almost allowed you to catch your breath.
“you’re going to get sick if you stay out here much longer. it’s cold and you’ve been up here for about twenty minutes now.” natasha’s voice rang through your ears. “i’m okay nat, it’s not too bad.” not a few seconds later you felt a jacket drape over your frame.
“may i sit?” you nodded and watched natasha place herself comfortably by your side. she said nothing, only taking in the new york view herself.
it was comforting, natasha was comforting. you could trust her with anything, no matter how bad it may be. she was like a warm blanket of security.
“she wasn’t bad, you know,” you began. natasha tilted her head. “who?”
“my mom.” there was a pause between your next choice of words. one natasha knew too well. you were debating, debating on whether or not you should continue sharing such a vulnerable piece of your being.
“she was never violent or anything when she was drunk. she never yelled or screamed at me. but she was clumsy, very, very clumsy…” you trailed.
“i feel like i have no reason to complain or call it traumatic because it doesn’t sound traumatic when i say it out loud. people have it so much worse, you know? so why do i feel so horrible about it? i mean, yeah, there were days, weeks, months where i had to take care of her because of how drunk she was, or because she fell and couldn’t get up. and yes, i was a kid, and i know it wasn’t normal, but it could’ve been worse.”
natasha adjusted herself to face you. she cupped your chin in her hands to look into your eyes. “you have every reason to feel the way you do. no kid should ever have to go through that. it doesn’t matter that other people have it worse than that. she was supposed to be the parent, not you. you were a child.”
“i know, but still-”
“don’t do that to yourself,” she cut you off.
you closed your eyes, leaning into her. “i just feel so stupid and normally it doesn’t affect me like this, but the party… being surrounded by so much alcohol and so many people drinking alcohol just reminded me of my mother.”
“it’s not stupid, please don’t let yourself hang onto those kinds of thoughts. besides, what made you go this time? i know you normally don’t attend these kinds of things.”
“tony wouldn’t leave me alone about it all week.”
“well that’s the last time he’ll ever do that.” natasha confirmed, adding a smile to her face as she rubbed your cheek.
“let’s go in and get you all warmed up, okay?”
you followed natasha all the way up to her room. confused, you stopped in your tracks.
“this isn’t my room?”
“take your pick, your room or my room. either way i’m not leaving you alone tonight.” your face softened before you felt a familiar warmth in your cheeks.
“your room please.”
natasha smirked as she opened her door. “any particular reason?”
“i like the way you smell.”
“oh?” she raised her eyebrow.
“sorry, i know that sounds weird-”
“no, it sounds adorable.” natasha corrected, dragging you into her room. “you can change into these, don’t worry about returning them.”
“thank you nat.”
. .
you spent the rest of the night with your head on natasha’s chest, her arms wrapped around your frame. the memories of your mother were put to rest for the remainder of the night. you chose to focus on natasha and how beautiful she looked in the moonlight.
and then you had the realization that she was your home.
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