#blarg writes things

[gryffindormischief]

noctambulate

A/N: shout out to @petalsinwoodvale (the ultimate ride or die) and @annabtg who beta'd a draft of this in record time only for me to not do anything for months :')

I hope you enjoy!

---

By the time Lily climbs aboard the Knight Bus, the sleeping berths are all claimed and she’s forced to do that awkward public transport (with the accompanying overstuffed backpack) shimmy down the aisle until she reaches an empty seat. Since she was eleven, Lily’s had enough occasions to ride that she’s fairly comfortable with the occasional jerking motions as the bus skitters across England. Luckily, the ride from Cokeworth back to London is fairly brief and once the bus reaches Diagon Alley, her flat is just two blocks away.

It was a bit annoying at first, the whole restriction on long range apparition and more importantly, apparating from even partially muggle communities. But logically, she knew that the growing magical population of age to apparate and the consequential increase in travel led to major interferences with muggle artifacts. One too many shorted out toasters, a few more fried kettles than strictly acceptable, and the muggle and magical ministries had brokered a temporary deal that involved less apparating until a longer-term solution could be dreamed up.

Aside from the inconvenience, overall Lily valued the forced exposure to other witches and wizards. It sounds silly and maybe a little sad, but if it weren’t for the trips she’s taken courtesy of the Knight Bus’s new extended route, she might not have seen another human that wasn’t barking orders at her in one way or another, for the last six months. It’s come to be a comfort to see Alfie’s friendly face as he asks whether she’s got any luggage to stow, his polite nod when she answers in the negative. 

Except for today – tonight really – she’d had a hastily packed, utterly boring, and slightly stolen canvas duffle to stow below the passenger cabin. That plus the invisible baggage of her latest, and maybe last, explosion with Petunia.

---Continue Reading on Ao3 (log in to read)---

#jily #jily au #James x lily #sirius #remus #blarg writes things #jily fic

[squirsquirrel]

I feel like this sums up how I write notes/ideas for fanfics pretty well...

If no one is going to hype me up then I'll do it myself XD

Also kinda a spoiler? But not really 'cause all you get from this is his and Smitty's relationship so have fun with that.

#Squir spiels #Yes I'm actually trying to finish this now sosbis #I've written a bit more dialogue that I'm happy with ^^ #A bit of Kryoz and a lot of Puffer #I'm excited for them all! Blarg might make a return too but idj #Idk* #I keep wanting to try new things in writing T-T I hope it works in this one

[tidepoolalgae]

okay maybe I'm writing a fic maybe I'll be posting my writing for once. maybe it'll happen.

#unfortunately despite it's shortfalls wednesday reminded me of my teen years #and it's in my brain #so I'm writing a thing. #blarg #I'm trying to put myself out there more... if I finish the first section I'm gonna try and post it #I am!! #to the void #writing adventures

[r0ttingsystem]

North here and I'm about to rant about system stuff, enjoy

I'm going through survivors guilt rn, kinda

I just read the experience of a system with an extreme persecutor and just

I don't know, thought about everything

We don't have many internal conflicts, it's peaceful

Right now I can see the people in the front room

Yellow and Tommy are gossiping about each other's crushes

Grumbot is drawing for his best friend

All our small littles are in the corner napping

Grian and Dani are to either sides of me, zoned out thinking about their partners

William and Steven are talking about school, since both of their sources are being students

Will is trying to see what other cool thing he can do with his new body, since him and commet fused into a subsystem

John is on his chair sleeping

Mary is just laying down under a whole bunch of blankets asleep

Blarg is cleaning up the headspace living room thats connected to the frontroom

Everyone else is doing their thing, drawing, talking, writing, sleeping, going in and out of their rooms

I'm just here

Trying to comprehend everything

Thing to make sense of all of this

Why are we peaceful? How can we sit here doing our thing while other systems have to deal with so much in their innerworld

Hell, our 'worst' persecutor is sleeping in a wooden chair cuddling a plushie and a music box

It doesn't help that I'm one of the only ones that can remember/care about our past

When I formed our system was a mess, everyone physically and emotionally torturing each other, we were Trying to hold ourselves together by a thread. Everything was loud everything was so god damn loud

But now it's just, quiet

Sometimes that bothers me

Why can't it be loud again I was used to be running around being one of the only ones willing to help the system

My brain is still in that mode

That I can't relax, if I do something bad will happen

But I know that nothing will happen

I know I can just lay down and take a nap for a while

I can't do my rounds? Rowan will be happy to run around headspace to check everything, he's a dog he'll be more then happy

Something going on in outerworld? Grian and Lio will take care of it

Something going on in innerworld? Again Lio could help, or if anyone needs advice they can ask dani

I know I can relax

But the thought of relaxing makes me more anxious then I can put into words

I feel like I'm the only one of a generation that has survived

The only ones from our "old system" that are still here are me, Mary and commet ,I guess will counts too cuz they share a body now, madness, misery and some more people I don't currently remember

But it doesn't bother them like it bothers me

Mary couldn't care less, commet/will too

Madness and misery don't remember much of anything really

And then there's me, it's my job to remember and to care about it, I have a whole office full of all the system information I can gather, which is most likely 1/3 of everything

And I don't understand why I'm at peace with that

Why do I like doing my job? Why does it calm me?

am I just a secret autism holder who's obsessed with information? Likely XD

Ah, that joke reminded me my job used to be a comedian, and I fucking hated that

I don't understand any of this and I'm trying to be at peace with that

But it's so hard when I'm obsessed with information to the point I beg people to let me rant to them about our system

I don't know where this was going but, thank you for listening to me

#north.txt #pst @bunnysiren plz see this #osdd system #did osdd #osdd community #osdd alter #osdd 1b #actually osdd #actually did #osddid #rant #long rant #idk what this was #it felt nice to get off my chest #osdd #traumagenic did #did alter #did system #did community #did #system rant

[starified-lizzy]

I figured I should redo my intro to my blog-

ELLO >:DDDD

Name’s Lizzy! Or Star! I really don’t give a fuck which you use!

I draw shit for FANDOMS

I write shit for FANDOMS

I got OCS whom I LOVE and ADORE.

“Can I draw fanart of your fics?” My sibling in Christ, we are married. /pos

“Can I draw fanart of your fanart(like DTIYS)?” My sibling in Christ. /pos

“Can I draw fanart of your OCs?” CHRIST. /pos

RAHHHHHH (it’s really fucking early I shouldn’t be doing this now ;-;)

Here’s a list of my socials, it is very limited because I hate the “standard” socials like Twitter and Insta and stuff like that. So it’s more like- fanfic sites, and any other blogs I own for you guys to check out >.>

My AO3

My Art Fight

My YouTube

My TikTok (basically dead at this point, I only ever like/favorite things on it, but I might start up again with my FNF au instead)

My Pinterest

My Spotify because sure

My FNF au blog

My demonpocalypse blog ([possibly] forever retired due to a severe issue in the community it was for)

Blog for food/recipes I want to try because MMMMMMMMMMM FOOOOD

Wow that’s actually not limited like I thought- hot damn I need to touch some grass.

HERES A LIST OF FANDOMS IM EITHER CURRENTLY IN, OR HAVE RETIRED FROM (Also CCs):

Retired-

DSMP (and MCYT as a whole for the most part), dude our community is in *shambles*. I’m so glad I left when I did, but at the same time O W.

ATLA. Technically I’m still in this fandom, but I only really get back into it/brainrot about it if I get a reminder, otherwise I kinda forget about it

FNAF. Same with ATLA, still technically in it, but I gotta be reminded it exists sometimes.

BATIM. Ditto

Wings of Fire. Ditto

Undertale. Ditto. Lizzy, my main persona, was actually an OC created from Undertale, who just ended up becoming her own person, and then ended up being associated with mine and my friend’s Minecraft au instead.

Onto CCs I no longer watch:

Any of the DSMP ppl, with very few exceptions

Jacksepticeye. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll still watch a video of his if it pops up and spikes my interest, but I don’t actively seek his content out anymore.

Any of the old Minecrafters. Like DanTDM, Stampy, Tiny Turtle & Little Lizard. Hell, I don’t even think any of the ones I listed even do YT at all anymore. I’ll still watch their old videos tho.

Current-

FNF. I really could give less of a fuck if y’all think it’s “bad” or “for kids (it’s not, I promise you)”. The music slaps, and quite a few mods are really well made, so eat my ass.

Day of Dragons. The dragons are cool. I don’t care about any drama in the community. I’m here for the cool fucking dragons.

The Isle. Once again, I don’t care about any drama in the community. I’m here for the cool ass dinosaurs because you can customize your own skins and they just look and sound cool (Dilo, Herarra, and Ptera are my faves)

Lethal Company. Do it for the Company.

RainWorld. Scugs and Scups. Need I say more?

Hollow Knight. Sorta falling out of this one, but until I beat the entire game (P5) I am not finished.

Minecraft. Technically in “the fandom”, but not really attached to a specific YTer or anything like that anymore. I just like the game.

CCs I still watch:

Astral Spiff. Sprog is a good gamer.

Smii7y and his friends like Grizzy, Droid, Puffer, Blarg, etc.

Jack Manifold. I only watch his You Laugh You Loose and Ghost Sighting Compilation videos. I don’t even know if he still does Minecraft anymore.

8-BitRyan. While he doesn’t swear in his videos, it’s kinda a breath of fresh air. Plus his edits are quite funny.

Markiplier. Yes. Just… yes…

IGP. His content is just interesting. The way he freaks out over shit is funny as hell. Does he do content with IcyCaress anymore? Their banter was funny, but idk if something happened, cuz I just don’t see much stuff with Icy in it anymore.

As of right now, that’s all I can think of. It’s nice to meet you!

#blog intro #introductory post #redid my intro because things changed and I wanted it to be more COLORFUL and CRAZY #artists on tumblr #fanfic writers #writers on tumblr #small youtuber #for fun

[not-alien-girl-v]

hi love ur work!!! could u write an eddie munson x reader where reader tells him she’s pregnant and he kills himself in the upside down instead of being a parent. also could y/n be secretly vecna? thanks 🤩🤩

I'm on my way to tell my boyfriend, eddie munson, that i'm pregnant. i'm so scared he will be upset, but i know he loves me, and deep down i know that he would never hate me for anything. i'm just so scared for such a big change. a baby is a huge responsibility! i hope we can make it through this endeavor!

i knock on his door.

'KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK'

he opens it and i see him, wearing his iconic hellfire t-shirt and jean jacket, hair a frizzy mess, but that was my man! i lunge forward and trap him in a hug, pee stick in hand.

"why are you so happy? especially when vecna is going around killing everyone!" eddie warns me. little does he know... hehehe.

i show him the pregnancy test in my hand. he jumps back. "EW DON'T TOUCH ME WITH IT!" he exclaims as he wipes the peepee off of his clothes.

"sorry! i'm just so happy! we're gonna have a baby!" i smile big at him but he doesn't smile back. what's wrong, i wonder.

"i-is it mine?" he asks me like a dumbass.

"of course it's yours! i'm not a slut, munson!" i poke fun at him. he still doesn't smile back.

suddenly, over a walkie talkie, a frantic voice starts talking. i think it's dustin, his weird little friend. he's already basically a father figure to those young boys in his dnd club. i don't get why he isn't happier to be a real dad!

"listen... y/n... you should probably go... don't call me... don't come by my house... we're done"

"EDDIE NOOOOOO!" i scream but it is too late. he kicks me out of his trailer, and i land hard on my ass on the cold, hard, ground.

i'm so fucked!

___

on the boat at lover's lake, above the entrance to the upside down

"so, how are things between you and y/n, eddie?" steve asks him, looking wearily down at the glowing portal below. no one knows where exactly it could magically transport them.

"she told me she was pregnant, so i dumped her ass!" steve high fives him at this.

"nice one man!" steve is happy at this.

"shut up you two! we have to jump down there to the portal! we have no idea what might happen to us, though! what are we going to do?" nancy worries like the worrying bitch she is.

"i'll go first" eddie volunteers.

"eddie no! it coul dbe dangerous!!!" robin warns like the hot bitch she is.

"girl. danger is literally my middle name!" eddie tells her sexily then jumps off the boat into the unknown. they all follow soon, hoping eddie doesn't lead them to certain death.

___

as sooon as eddie wakes up, he is face to face with y/n, his pregnant ex-girlfriend. "w-what?"

"hi eddie" she says

"this can't be real!" he says but looks around and sees the rest of the gang down there with him.

"you bet your ass it is! if you don't want to be a father, then all your friends will have to die! also blarg!! i'm vecna! i'm actually evil and stuff and you r baby will be half vecna half munson!"

"noooooooo!" eddie curses the heavens above for his terrible fate. "it's a good thing i always carry around a rope!"

eddie takes out his pocket-rope and walks to a vecna tree, which is like a regular tree but it's in vecnas house and thats scary!

he ties a noose with the rope, and gets up on a chair.

"omg eddie nooooooooo!" steve cries but it is too late, eddie has tied the rope around his neck and jumped off.

he is now dead!

"noo! how will i ever raise my baby now!"

"omg girl he's dead..." robin whispers to nancy and nancy agrees bevcause its true.

"now you all have to go! prepare to die, teens!" y/n/vecna says in her vecna voice and she does the clock thing and then robin and nancy and steve all die from the vecna curse of whatever scares them or something.

"haha!" y/n/vecna exclaims in victory!

#eddie munson #stranger things

[strawbbunnies]

*taps mic* is this thing on?

hi i'm cameron, but you can call me nico or jamie (or strawb!) pronouns: he/she/it/bun + other neos are cool too! for more info or other socials: here's my carrd!

content creators: - smii7y+ / frog house ( smii7y / kryoz / bigpuffer / blarg / pezzy / grizzy / elasticdroid ) - goons ( mcnasty / snipingsoup / thedooo / blarg ) - markiplier / ethan nestor / jacksepticeye - bigjigglypanda / fourzeroseven / wildcat - ranboo / sneegsnag / white noise / philza / slimecicle / ted nivison / schlatt

animanga (+ fave characters): - trigun ( meryl / vash ) - my hero academia ( hawks / aizawa / ochako ) - fire force ( arthur / obi / benimaru ) - bungo stray dogs ( poe / chuya / lucy ) - the promised neverland ( emma / ray ) + so many others! {check out my anilist!}

other interests: - art ( drawing / graphic design / photography ) - writing ( original stories / fanfics / poetry ) - animals ( cats / bunnies / red pandas ) - music ( bbno$ / yung gravy / glaive / bo burnham / lovejoy / etc. ) - games ( fnaf / minecraft /phasmophobia / etc. ) - media ( stranger things / don't hug me i'm scared / analog horror / horror movies / MCU / etc. )

anyway that's all for now, take care nerds <2 -nico

#nico.exe #11.17.22 #man i forgot how everything works on here lmfao #intro post #anyway #maybe you'll see me on here more idk yet #i need to clean out my old likes and reblogs LOL

[fayfictions]

Would you ever write Blarg x Dooo? I’m an absolute sucker for gang stuff but them being in a band would be great too. Your choice! Love your work

yes ofc!! i will do all goons ships mwah

~

Dooo knocked on the door. “Blarg? Can I please talk to you?”

He didn’t get a response, but he knew the man was inside; he saw the light beneath the door.

He knocked harder. “I know you’re in there. Just let me talk to you. It’ll be quick.”

Still nothing.

“If you don’t open this door, I’m letting myself in.”

With no response for the third time, Dooo opened the door.

Blarg erupted from his bathroom, pipe in hand. “You see this pipe? You’ve got two seconds before I shove it up your ass. Get out.”

“Blarg, c’mon, we can’t keep doing this-“

Blarg raised the pipe and began walking towards him.

Dooo was able to grab it when Blarg swung it down, twisting his arm behind his back.

Blarg cried out and dropped it. “Let go of me, you-“

“Let me fucking speak to you and maybe I will.”

Blarg struggled for a few more seconds. “Fine. You’ve got one minute. Then get out of my face or I’m punching you in the throat.”

Dooo let go of him.

Blarg stepped back, hissing and rubbing at his shoulder. “What do you want.” He glared at Dooo.

“I just wanted to apologize,” Dooo said.

Blarg laughed harshly. “Apologize? An apology isn’t going to fix what you fucking did, Dooo.”

“I know. But I didn’t mean to; I didn’t mean to ruin the mission, I didn’t mean to distract you, or even for that to come out in the first place.”

“And yet it did. So congrats.”

Dooo huffed, crossing his arms. “Look, it’s not my fucking fault I have feelings, okay? If I could, I’d choose to get rid of them. But I can’t. And I have to live with that. And I’ve lived with that this entire time! Do you know how long I’ve liked you? Do you? Longer than you can imagine. I’m sorry that it fucked up this mission, but I don’t want it to fuck up our friendship. So if you could quit acting like a bitch about this, I’d really appreciate it. I’m not asking for a pity fuck from you. I’m asking for my friend back.”

Blarg stood in silence, stunned at Dooo’s words. He looked away from him and sighed, almost like he felt guilty.

“When you confessed,” he began, “my heart broke. I didn’t want you to be in love with me. I didn’t want to be someone who would cause such a problem if I had died or disappeared or whatever. And we were in that situation: I could’ve died. I don’t want someone I love to bear the weight of my death.”

Dooo softened. “Matt…”

Blarg flinched at the use of his real name.

Dooo walked up to him and turned his head to face him before caressing his face. “You shouldn’t feel guilty for love. You should embrace it, work with it. Fighting it only makes things worse.”

Blarg chuckled softly. “Yeah. You know a lot about that, huh?”

Dooo smiled. “Yeah. I do. If you’re willing to work through this, than so am I.”

Blarg looked down in thought before meeting Dooo’s eyes again. “Okay,” he breathed out. “I’ll try.”

Dooo’s smile widened, and he hugged Blarg as tight as he could. Blarg hugged back with the same strength.

#angst? #fayfic #blarg x dooo

[everyeternity]

Heyo! I'm Eris, and this is my chaotic little blog. Trying to organize it so here's a little intro/tag guide.

i'm a loudly deaf disabled trans butch lesbian, and as a general rule i like talking about those things with people that ask in good faith. i'm also a musician, (amateur) photographer, artist, writer, woodworker, and general "try anything once to see if i like it" enjoyer.

I really like philosophical writing as a medium, im not the most well versed on all things but my happy little hole of existentialist optimism has been really helpful for me and i try to convey that in my writing!

on that topic, my current series/project is #communities in concrete, a feature on what communities are and can look like, but also on how the loss of the third space and the loss of community are independent phenomena with a connection only in theory, and how to solve the latter when the former feels hopeless.

Other tags of note are #its 3am somewhere which is my main shitposting tag, #the blarg for reblogs and non-oc, and #everythingeternity which is all oc.

#its 3am somewhere #communities in concrete #everythingeternity #the blarg #intro #tag guide #chaos!

[gryffindormischief]

Jily Prompt: He's definitely your son.

a/n: shorty! Will be on ao3 later 😄

—

“Where’s Harry?”

James sighs. “In his room.”

Lily lowers the heat on the stove and begins pulling dishes from the cabinet for dinner. When James moves to help, she asks, “Time out?”

“No. And he is definitely your son, in case you were wondering.”

“Twenty-three hours of labor made that fairly clear to me,” Lily chuckles as she sets the table, james close behind with silverware.

James chuckles and pours three glasses of water. “Right - harder to be confused when you birth the little sprog. Though he could’ve been mixed up at Mungo’s.”

“Have you seen his hair or eyes? Never questioned his parentage, love.”

“Could you be any more logical?”

“I sense impatience warring with endearment,” Lily says with a laugh as she puts serving dishes on the table. “I’ll bite, why do we know for sure Harry is my son?”

“He just told me to leave and gave me a pitying look and said he could finish the laundry folding himself. I waited at the door and he proceeded to sneak and refold all of his socks and pants.”

“It’s official. You’re actually incapable of properly folding laundry.”

James shakes his head. “More like it’s official that you’re mad and it’s genetic.”

#jily #blarg writes things #jily au #james x lily #harry #the potters

[squirsquirrel]

Had the weirdest dream where in the dream I dreamt about frouse and them at some party or dinner thing and Blarg and Puffer were more or less drunk and I've no idea why but "FEET FOR WINE" became a chant that even the waiters were shouting and the need to write this as a fic is a little silly

#squir spiels #btw its meant to be wine for feet but theyre drunk and ig the waiters were too??? idk dreams

[the-storytellers-seer]

Fickle Muse

What was that, Lassie? Did Lirael fall into a well? No? She fell into a vat of radioactive goo and became a superhero? None of those things? She just somehow pissed off her muse and was unable to write anything even moderately decent?

Yeah so...hiiiii. I'm still here, trying to write.

I'm stuck trying to write Sarea and Teldryn's battle through Miraak's Temple with Frea. And there's a part of me that's wants to gloss over the whole nonsense, but another part of me that doesn't because I can't gloss over all the battles just because I don't enjoy writing them. Blarg.

In other news, I'm also working on a one-shot prompt. Again, set in the same timeline as Sarea's story. This time with everyone's favorite grumpy werewolf. Wherein introvert werewolf escorts extrovert alchemist girl to Windhelm and they solve a murder together.

It's totally a one-shot...even though it feels like it might be a really short three-chapter thing...

Anyway, here's a blurb:

The Imperial girl was back. Ostensibly, he knew she arrived every Morndas a few hours after sunrise, but her presence was something of a shock to his senses every week. So much so, that Vilkas preferred to stay far away from the hall when she arrived to deliver her packages to Tilma. It wasn’t just her voice—loud and excessively bright like a pealing bell, or her wide smile that she foolishly greeted everyone with like annoyingly insistent beam of sunshine after a night of carousing. No, it was her scent. The combination of lemons and lilacs--like the girl herself--was annoying bright and tooth-rottingly sweet. He'd made the mistake of lingering over his morning meal to speak with Skjor about the previous day's dragon attack—and the woman who’d devoured the beast’s soul—when his nose filled with the cloying scent of her…mere moments before her overly loud voice rang through the hall. “Good morning, Companions!” she crowed.

A few hullos echoed back to her. Vilkas gritted his teeth and stood, with barely a nod toward Skjor as he stepped away from the bench. The entirely wrong move as her sun-bright-on-the-snow smile aimed toward him. “Good morning…um…I’m sorry I have a hard time telling you and your twin apart, are you Farkas?”

Vilkas’ felt his teeth grind together and he took a breath through his nose in a vain attempt to calm himself. She was an idiot, he decided. A migraine-inducing idiot with less sense than a rabbit. His eyes slid shut briefly as he fought against the urge to tell her so. He was not some brash youth with more anger than sense anymore. He was a man grown and fully capable of calmly distancing himself—his calming inhalations had the unintended effect of drawing in more of the scent. The sweet, clean scent bringing to mind freshly washed linens drying in the mountain air, tangling up his thoughts for the briefest of moments. It caused him to step closer, his finely tuned senses detecting the increase in her heart rate, but not the scent of fear. When his eyes slid open, he was much closer to her than he’d intended. Her small face tilted upwards at an almost comical angle given the fact that the top of her head barely came up to his sternum. Her eyes were a deep greenish brown like a mossy forest floor. They stared up at him with expectation and a surprising lack of intimidation given the way he was looming over her. “No, sorry, you’re Vilkas, aren’t you? Sheesh, that was rude of me! Have you seen Tilma I’m here to drop off the alchemy order.”

He was saved from having to answer—or even after to find his tongue at all—by the aforementioned woman. “Ah Luci! Sorry I was delayed in the kitchens!”

Just like that, the woman flitted away and Vilkas found himself able to move and think again. The opportunity was used to sneer at the ground before he hurried out into the training yards without giving into the urge to glance back.

#tes v skyrim #ao3 fanfic #writing #tesblr #writing prompt #vilkas #didja catch the Sarea easter egg?

[amdreamland]

Hello Again

Sorry for making this blog just to abandon it, I’ve just been thinking of what to do next.

I think I may (one day) post some videos/silent vlogs since that’s what I really want to do. Then possibly move them to maybe YouTube shorts or something like that. As for some other things I’m not too sure if I wanted to post any writing on either here or maybe a side blog? That or go back to Wattpad or maybe some other app or site where you can most non-fandom original writing. That is if said places exists.

Blarg! I know I’m rambling to no one but I wanted to let it all out somewhere why not a blog no one knows about? I’ll try to bring this blog to life… one day… maybe.

Until Then

♥︎A.M.

#ramblings #rambles #amwriting #writing #writeblr #personal post #personal thoughts

[thessaliaxiv]

Day 2: Postcards from Paradise

The ground outside is currently littered with the usual autumnal detritis: deciduous leaves of a dozen different earth tones, collecting on the lawn, clumped at the sides of the roads, some flat on the pavement and sidewalk.

I used to receive a postcard each December, courtesy of a friend who never failed to acknowledge the end of the year with his contribution to the mailbox. I don't have any family nor anyone else to receive end-of-year gifts from, so this was really meaningful to me. I met my online friend in 2001 on a diary writing site we both utilized. I was going through some stuff at the time and I had a lot of experiences and memories swimming in my brain that I was compelled to blarg out just as often as those things came to mind. I really needed that practice–I've always been introverted and rather an island unto myself, and it was very, very different to put thoughts to virtual paper in this blogging format, and very different indeed to see the comments of others as they read my words and shared their own in replies. It was at once a catharsis, a tool of self-awareness, and a self-indulgent activity. It was through those comments that I came to know my friend, and in turn for me to know him through his own entries.

He did even more belly-button-gazing than I did, big long entries of easily five thousand words at a time, babbling about his current life, sharing past pains and triumphs, things he wanted to work on and goals he wanted to achieve. He repeated himself often but I didn't mind, it was on his mind and he wanted to say it again.

Somewhere in there he asked me for my mailing address, as it was nearing the end of the year and he wanted to send a letter. I didn't see any harm in it and told him. I received my first postcard a couple of weeks later, featuring a print of a snow-covered mountain scene. He was as non-religious as I am, and there were no mention or symbol of specific holidays, just a nice winter landscape. He wrote about his hope that the coming year would bring good things to me, and that I should take heart in those things in the past year that had been meaningful. He apologized for his handwriting, as he had hand tremors that never did get diagnosed but made fine motor control a challenge. I liked his handwriting, shaky but quite readable capital letters.

It became a highlight of each December to receive one. Something tangible that someone thoughtfully picked out for me and took the trouble to go to the post office and send. I moved many times, and each time, he'd ask for an updated address, and each winter, I'd receive another letter to add to the stack I kept with my box of photos.

He resided in a place he called Paradise, and for him it was, a place where it snowed more than it rained, in the shadow of one of the biggest peaks in the US.  He wrote about it often. He'd often write about how he wished he knew more people in the decently sized city he resided in, how he'd hike on the warm summer days, and about how much snow there was piled against the "shoebox" studio apartment he lived in. He wrote sporatically, sometimes writing several entries in a day, sometimes not writing in his diary for weeks, occasionally not for a month or two.

I didn't think anything of it, when there came a time that he did not update his diary nor leave notes. I last saw personal note activity from him in February of that year, a comment on one of my most recent entries at the time. His last entry was dated in early March. And then all was still. Peaceful, as if his diary was holding its breath. He'd written about potentially moving to another city, to be closer to a lady friend he knew and had been romantically involved with previously.

He didn't own his own computer, but instead utilized an internet connection at the local gaming hub in the town he lived in. He didn't have a phone, only a pager. One could send texts to it and the pager would scroll the short message a few times until dismissed, or alert him that someone was trying to reach him by phone, and he'd head to a payphone and call back. So he was mostly off the grid most of the time, as far as the internet is concerned. The radio silence was routine and expected. I knew he'd write again, he always did.

Spring came and went, and with summer came news that his state's government had decided to rename that mountain peak, dismissing the old one and reinstating the identifying moniker that the aboriginal people had always called it. My friend also preferred the original name to the one the settlers had decided upon back in the day. I thought for sure that my friend would at least stop by his diary to proclaim happily, even if just a terse entry, that the mountain's rightful name had been restored. But his diary remained dormant.

That was weird, I thought to myself, but shrugged and continued on with life and all that. I thought perhaps he had succeeded in moving, and was having difficulty finding a reliable internet connection to utilize as he had previously. Perhaps he was enjoying life with his lady friend, to the exclusion of all other attention-getters. Totally fine.

Fall came along, and I didn't think of my friend often, but occasionally I would continue to stop in, to see if he'd written or interacted with anyone. I followed some of his other oft commenters back to their diaries, to see if he'd written any notes there. Not a one. Huh, I thought.

I still didn't think anything of it. I was looking forward to his postcard, though.

It was the first week of December of that year, he'd maintained radio silence since early March. It was the middle of the night, and he came to mind rather suddenly, as I realized I had yet to receive a postcard. I viewed his diary once more, noted that his most recent entry was still the one from March, and shrugged. I amused myself with other stuff, but he kept coming to mind. After sitting on that thought for an hour, I decided to search for his real life name in Google. There's a famous guy with a variation of his name, but the last name is spelled different. I didn't see anything that was my friend. I didn't expect any, as private as he was.

I sat on this thought for an hour more, and went back to Google, searching for his real life name, and adding the word "obituary". I held my breath as I hit the return key to pull up some results. I wasn't expecting any results. That famous guy had passed away within the last year and there were plenty of articles and notices and such about him. On the second page of results, there was one with the correct spelling of my friend's surname. I went ahead and clicked on it.

The writer of the obituary didn't go into any great detail about this particular person. I noted that this person had the same birthday as my friend's. Had grown up in the same state as my friend. I thought, huh, that's rather coincidental.  In the latter sentences of this obituary, they mentioned the person's online username. And I realized I was reading the death notice of my friend.  I reread the article with much more scrutiny.  "A cardiac event" was all that was mentioned as a cause. I noticed the date. Mid-March. Two weeks at most past his last diary entry.

In a blur I reread some of his latter diary entries. No mention of health difficulties, just life as usual, getting ready to move, and then moving. I couldn't see anything after that, as I bawled for two hours straight. I think it was rougher to think that I didn't know for nine months that he was gone. I'd reread the obituary later and surmise his brother had written it. His parents were both still living at the time the event had occurred. It's been seven years now, I would imagine one or both are gone now.

Winters are more difficult now. Sometimes I ask online friends if they want to exchange Yule cards or letters and such, but no one ever takes me up on it. Mail is just for flyers, advertisements, ballots, junk, and letters for others in this household.

The other day, I was staring out the window, and there was a decent gust, stirring up the loose leaves on the ground, and removing more from the trees on neighboring properties and scattering them far and wide. I suddenly thought to myself, those are my friend's postcards, right on time, just as the holiday season begins, like clockwork. I can count on them every year. I will never be without them.

Like most other things, it's just a private thought. And I recognize it's a rather depressing thought to the start of the season. But it does allow me to bring a voice to the sadness that wells up this time of year, to express it for a moment, and then get on with the good stuff that also comes, the changing season, the colder weather, the events, and the everyday little things that make me smile, like his postcards from Paradise.

#holidailies #daily writing challenge

[iceslushii]

Chapters: 12/? Fandom: Banana Bus Squad Rating: Not Rated Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: John | KryozGaming/SMii7Y Characters: Marcel | BasicallyIDoWrk, Anthony | BigJigglyPanda, Matt | BlargMyShnoople, Jonathan | H2ODelirious, Scotty | fourzer0seven, Tyler | I AM WILDCAT, John | KryozGaming, Daithi De Nogla, Chris | BigPuffer, Brian | Terroriser, SMII7Y, Evan | VanossGaming, Brock | MooSnuckel, Luke | Cartoonz Additional Tags: There are a lot of characters - Freeform, including a frog or two :), new au i have and as per usual i dont have a name for it yet, actually this fic includes at least 5 frogs? idk i havent counted, im not the best at making them in character whoops, otherwise this fic is decent enough, krii7y isnt the main focus here by the way Summary:

After finding an unusual portal while playing Minecraft, Marcel, Brian and Anthony hesitantly enter it ..and then they find out that Minecraft has become a reality for them (and eventually their friends).

also in this au, delirious uses it/its pronouns, a lot of others use he/they, puffer uses they/he and brock uses they/them

#bbs #banana bus squad #basicallyidowrk #bigpuffer #moo snuckel #h20delirious #smii7y #i am wildcat #blarg #terroriser #bigjigglypanda #fourzer0seven #slushii writes sometimes #i actually dont remember who is in this chapter and im not going through the entire thing to find out because im lazy :/ #bbs biomes au

[lordsardine]

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#*keeps dully staring at his notes* #they're valid points but a lot of the things he said were bad were like. intentional which ......... #idk man :( #i was going to go to a writer's group tomorrow night and now i dont feel like writing ^^; #but i think i will try to tackle editing it then before the meeting #today im just gonna. *gestures vaguely* draw i guess #after work. which hoo boy totally not paying attention right now #miscellaneous #see my issue is that my job is blarg. so then i put all my energy into my writing. which turns out is blarg. so then i just feel drained #the comic version was a bust and now this..........OTL #yeah it's just one agent but. ......... #i think i can implement these edits just jesus i wish he said there was a single thing he liked about it #had someone critic my one oc story too and provide like . nothing they liked and killed all motiviation for that too so #it's tough #anyway #enough rambling #just makes me mad. it feels like the people in the online writing class im in lied to my face about even liking the story #or that the narrator sounds good #*screams into hands*