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#bodyguard fic
three-drink-amy · 2 months
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Thank you for the tags @freneticfloetry @carlos-in-glasses @cha-melodius @kiwichaeng! Also, thank you to people who have tagged me in numerous things in the last couple weeks. I haven’t been around much. I will get to all my nice asks soon and send some belated ones!
“Are you a good driver on the left side of the road?” Shaan asks, that same piercing stare on Alex. It makes him squirm a bit.
Alex wants to stare back at him, but he drops his gaze. “I…” Straightening his shoulders and picking up his head, he feigns confidence. “I’m a good, adaptable driver. I could do this.”
Henry is no help. He just laughs from the backseat.
“I’m sure you are,” Shaan says, a bit patronizing. “As it is, I don’t want tomorrow’s headline to be that the Prince of Wales was killed in a car driving on the wrong side of the road by his American security.”
“That seems like it would be bad for international relations,” Henry quips.
Alex turns around from the passenger seat to glare at him. “You’re no help.”
“Never claimed to be,” Henry replies with a winning grin.
No pressure tagging: @everwitch-magiks @welcometololaland @rmd-writes @clottedcreamfudge @indomitable-love @athousandrooms @dumbpeachjuice @walkinginland @liminalmemories21 @alrightbuckaroo @bonheur-cafe @catanisspicy
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blindmagdalena · 1 year
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I'm pretty new to the fandom so i dont know if it's been done yet— but I'm loving the thought of a reader with a target on their back x homelander who's been assigned by vought to protect them. A task he deems rather troublesome and unworth his time... at first. 👀
i LOVE the bodyguard trope!!! especially if it includes forced proximity. Homelander having to babysit you, maybe you're an important political figure being targeted by a supe threat. neither of you are happy with the arrangement, he'd MUCH rather be out actively dealing with the threat, but it's insisted he stay with you as the most crucial line of defense. he's been pissy with you all day and finally you say, "Will you get over yourself already?" and he is SHOOK. stares with wide eyes, lips parted. he scoffs at you and says, "No. I won't. I should be out there, where the action is, not babysitting some pampered political princess." "Oh, I'm the pampered princess? Please, you were just complaining they don't have Wi-Fi in the top secret bunker." Infuriated, he shouts, "Everywhere has Wi-Fi!"
it's nothing but bickering, but inevitably Homelander says something that just... makes you laugh. like, really, really laugh. full on tears in your eyes, genuine belly laughter. Homelander's ready to be offended, he's ready to seethe through his teeth, asks you what the fuck is so funny. "You are," you say, shaking your head. "Under all that bravado, you're actually... pretty damn funny. Honestly, I'm glad you're here. No one ever talks to me the way you do." and he is just. thoroughly disarmed by that, realizing the exact same thing about you. so he scoffs. he looks away. for the first time, he's quiet without sulking. just... thinking.
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wh0re-behavi0r · 1 year
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Seven Sentence Sunday
tagged by @alyxmastershipper @spotsandsocks
“When would you come here?” Someone asks and Buck flashes a smile. 
“All the time. To get out of music lessons, to spend some time with my sister, and to make friends. It was always fun to make those temporary friends at the park, wasn’t it?” This playground holds some of his favorite childhood memories. And it holds some of his most painful memories, too, like the time he broke his arm ‘cause someone dared him to jump off a swing and called him a pussy if he didn’t do it. 
The cameras go off to get some B-roll and Buck takes a seat on the swing, legs really close to the ground.  He hears a clearing of someone’s throat to the left so he tilts his head up and sees Eddie smiling, the sun lighting up his face. “Is this seat taken?” Buck shakes his head no. 
“I liked making friends at the park, too. I was a little shy before middle school, and it was easy here because everyone needed someone to play with. And I loved the swings.” 
Buck smiles fondly, hoping that when they stop in Texas he’ll get to see pictures of younger Eddie. “I did too. I was always competing with someone for who could jump off the swing at the highest point, breaking some bones, and competing again. At least, when I had time. And I always won,” he smirks.
tagging @eddiescowboy @eddiediazisascorpio @eddiediass @elvensorceress @swiftiebuckleys @stanningsky @monsterrae1 @the-likesofus @bekkachaos @trashbaget @loveyourownsmiilee @lostinabuddiehaze @eddiesbleps @ajunerose @heartbeatdiaz and anyone else who wants to do this
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scottxlogan · 3 months
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Chapters: 4/? Fandom: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Tony Stark Characters: James "Bucky" Barnes, Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Morgan Stark (Marvel Cinematic Universe), Pepper Potts, Happy Hogan Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Bodyguard Bucky Barnes, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fake Dating, Tony Stark Has PTSD, Single Parent Tony Stark, Panic Attacks, Stalker, Sexual Content, Sexual Tension, Tony Stark has a stalker, Past Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Past Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, Bucky Barnes & Steve Rogers Friendship, Emma Frost/Steve Rogers - Freeform, Swearing, Adult Content, Explicit Language, Dirty Talk, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Parent Tony Stark, Tony Stark Has Issues, Flirting, War Veteran Bucky Barnes, Mild Blood, Touch-Starved Tony Stark, Dancing, past trauma, Protective Happy Hogan
  Chapter Summary: Tony's life goes into an uproar when Morgan goes missing. Determined to figure out what happened to her, Tony returns home ready to seek out the truth behind his daughter's disappearance. What he, Bucky and Happy discover next will have lasting consequences moving forward.
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urdepressedslut · 9 months
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You’re Mine, Sunshine (masterlist) ♡
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♡ Pairing: Grumpy!Bodyguard!Bucky Barnes x Sunshine!Fem!Reader (Mob!Au Bodyguard!Au)
♡ Series Summary: Bucky gets picked by a very rich and respected man to be his daughter’s personal bodyguard. The Father warns him that it won’t be an easy job, that she is a brat and difficult to deal with. But what happens when Bucky meets you and you’re the complete opposite?
♡ Series Warnings: mentions of amputation, dark themes, violence, death/death threats, talk of parent death, fluff, angst, stalking, daddy issues, anxiety attacks/panic attacks, abuse, depression, depressive episodes, PTSD, dry humping, hints to smut, (warnings to be added as new chapters are released)
Trope ⇢ Grumpy x Sunshine ☀️
(SERIES ONGOING)
Last Updated: 9/8/23
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT | SERIES 18+
⇨ Chapter One
↳ After Pierce interviews Bucky for the job, he warns him of you. Bucky is starting to rethink his decision, but when he meets you... you're not what he expected.
⇨ Chapter Two
↳ Bucky takes you home, and later finds you in the library. You both get to know each other a little better, but Bucky is hesitant.
⇨ Chapter Three
↳ Bucky has a surprise meeting with Pierce, getting informed about your secret admire. Meanwhile, Bucky tries to keep things professional, he’s hesitant to cross the line when you need him.
⇨ Chapter Four
↳ You don’t know what to think of Bucky after he took you to bed last night. Bucky can’t continue to keep the stalking situation hidden from you. Something is found on your doorstep.
⇨ Chapter Five
↳ Getting to know each other better doesn’t go according to plan. Bucky has to comfort you and fix the mess he made. Will you forgive him?
⇨ Chapter Six
↳ Bucky receives a morning visit from Steve, with the news about what was in the box. Bucky continues to think about what he should do. Should he tell you the truth about your stalker?
⇨ Chapter Seven
↳ Bucky finds you making a mess in the kitchen, attempting to bake and offers his help. The two of you get to talking and some reveals about each other begin to come out. Will he finally tell you about your stalker?
⇨ Chapter Eight
↳ After a surprise visit from Pierce, tension arises as he threatens Bucky of his job. Pierce wants to have a talk with you and it doesn't go very well.
⇨ Chapter Nine
↳ After the events from the other day, you try and cope with the reality of what happened. The world is a lot less colorful than you remember. Bucky helps comfort you after you realize you have no one left.
⇨ Chapter Ten
↳ Someone comes knocking at your door in the morning. Bucky answers and is surprised with who he finds. Are they going to help them or hurt them?
⇨ Chapter Eleven
↳ The tension can't be ignored anymore between you and Bucky. Steve shows up and he's not alone.
⇨ Chapter Twelve
↳ Reality is hitting you as you, Bucky, Steve and his men all venture off to a secret safe house only Steve knows about. The events from the last couple of days are starting to hit you with a sickening force, leaving you weak and crippled.
⇨ Chapter Thirteen
↳ Your dreams consist of random memories of your parents, but are they really random? Despite the past days of hell—you still find it difficult to resist Bucky. You two spend a heated morning together, devouring each other while you still have these moments.
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mediocredreams · 2 months
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Just Watch Me - Pt 1
Bodyguard!Eddie Munson x Spoiled!Rich!Fem!Reader
Summary: When your father hired a guard to keep an eye on you he didn’t mean like this…
Read Part 2 here
Word Count: ~3.1k
Warnings: fluff, mild smut, masturbation (f), vibrator use, swearing, brief mention of choking, brief mention of piv 18+ MDNI
A/N: Just another little mini-series. Think The Bodyguard meets Clueless, but also it’s porn? Haaaa ;)
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Ok sure, you were a spoiled brat. But to be completely fair, it wasn’t exactly your fault.
Ever since the day you were born with a silver spoon in your mouth, your life had been like a daydream gilded in 24-carat gold.
You were your father’s little princess, and like true royalty you were never denied a single thing your heart desired. Your father liked to joke that as a baby, even your diapers had been haute couture.
Yes, maybe it was all a bit excessive. But you were his treasured only child, and to him you deserved nothing but the best.
Growing up, all of your nannies had doted on you. You had the best of everything and you seldom heard the word no. On top of that, everyone in your life constantly told you that you were the most gorgeous, precious gift to the universe.
How’s a girl supposed to stay humble when surrounded with that kind of hype?
During high school you had been the queen bee who ruled the hive. All of your girlfriends had idolized you, and every guy at school would have given his left nut to get with you.
Everything had been perfect and your life was a dream.
That was, until a few years after graduation when your parent’s sudden and unexpected divorce popped the sweet, cotton candy-scented bubble that sheltered you from reality.
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Seemingly out of blue your mother announced that she was leaving your father.
She had dropped the bomb one evening as you all ate dinner in your mansion’s exquisitely decorated dining hall. The gold bracelets at her wrist had jangled as she swirled her champagne flute dramatically, announcing her plans to move across the country with her much younger lover, Steve.
Your mother was a famous actress and had met Steve on the set of her latest movie, Mannequin 3: Dressed to Kill. According to her it had been love at first sight. You had to admit Steve was a pretty good looking guy, albeit a bit hairy for your taste. But, to each their own.
After the divorce your mother made sure to phone you occasionally and visited as often as her career and personal life allowed. To be honest, with the busy filming schedule she’d had for most of your life, you barely noticed any difference.
You’d basically been raised by nannies, and had a closer relationship with most of the in-house staff than your own mother; not that you would ever say that to her. It would have crushed her.
Your father had been understandably upset for a while after the divorce, but his tears were soon dried by Starla, aka your new stepmom. After a whirlwind courtship she and your father married almost a year to the day your mother moved out.
As much as you tried to accept your father’s new wife, there was just something about Starla that didn’t sit right with you. Possibly it was the fact that she was barely in her 30’s, and not much older than you. You couldn’t understand what someone young and beautiful like Starla saw in your boring, old father.
It didn’t take long after the wedding for Starla’s presence to start unraveling your once comfortable existence. Though she played nice in front of others, you could tell she felt threatened by the close relationship you had with your father.
One day you even overheard her telling him that there was no reason his adult daughter needed to be living in their home like some kind of freeloader. Starla had made it very clear that she wanted him to tell you to move out.
Of course your father would hear nothing of the sort, but you knew it was only a matter of time before Starla got her way and your Gucci-clad ass was kicked to the curb.
You knew you would be able to count on your father to help you find another suitable place to live, but would that place have an Olympic-sized swimming pool and 24-hour maid service? Hardly.
To keep things copacetic with Starla you carried on as best you could, always faking a smile and trying to live in relative harmony with your wicked step-mother.
But everything was no longer perfect. Life was no longer a dream.
Things were tense.
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Eventually as more time passed, Starla seemed to give up on her little campaign to have you ousted from your family home and things started to go back to normal. That was, until the fateful night when there was a break and enter at your mansion.
Thankfully no one had been home at the time of the robbery, but the thieves did manage to make away with a large amount of cash and jewels from your father’s safe.
The night of the break-in you had been planning to spend the night at home, but had been invited over to your best friend’s house for a sleepover at the last minute.
Such a lucky twist of fate.
Your father had been a wreck afterwards, torturing himself with thoughts of what might have happened to you if you had been home alone during the robbery. Surprisingly, Starla didn’t seem that shook up. She was such a trooper.
Needless to say after that night, your father became very nervous about leaving you or Starla alone in the house.
He worked erratic hours due to his international business dealings, so he decided to hire a security team to keep an eye on you at all times.
You protested that hiring a full time bodyguard was ridiculous and unnecessary, but your father wouldn’t budge. You were his precious daughter and he couldn’t bear the thought of you being in danger.
The first guy the security service sent over was named Walter, and was so old and frail that you probably could have knocked him over with a light sneeze.
Walter didn’t make you feel very protected, but you didn’t mind. You were used to doing what you wanted, when you wanted. How were you expected to date or carry on a normal social life with some old geezer following you around all day and night?
Thankfully, Walter had been more than happy to leave you to your own devices, spending most of his day nodding off in a chair with his hat pulled down over his sleepy eyes to shield them from the light.
Sadly, after only a few weeks on the job Walter had experienced a medical emergency, and the agency had needed to send over a replacement while he recovered in hospital.
Cue the newest pain in your ass.
Tall, with dark curly hair that he kept tied back off his shoulders. Tattooed and rugged in a rockabilly sort of way. He wore black doc marten boots, and you wrinkled your nose when you noticed how the thick soles left scuff marks on the polished marble floor.
He had a strong jaw, big brown eyes and plush, full lips. You couldn’t deny that the man was attractive, if you were into that sort of thing. Which you most certainly were not!
Ever since you were a young girl you had dreamed of meeting your very own Prince Charming. The perfect man with a flashy smile, illustrious career and a big fat…bank account to fund the lifestyle to which you were accustomed.
In high school you had dated Bobby Gold, captain of the football team and reigning prom king. When you met Bobby he had dazzled you with his winning smile, cool car and extremely large house in a great neighborhood.
The only problem with dating Bobby was that, despite him being perfect in almost every way, you never felt any attraction to him no matter how hard you tried to convince yourself you should.
Bobby’s kisses left you cold. His touch made you cringe. And when you finally slept with him things didn’t get any better. It wasn’t only that he couldn’t manage to make you feel good, he couldn’t make you feel anything at all.
After graduation, Bobby had given you a ring and asked you to wait for him while he went to college, but you had just laughed in his face and said no way.
You knew there had to be something better out there than a selfish guy who couldn’t manage to get you off, you just had to find him.
Since your breakup with Bobby you’d been casually dating. You had thought that with your good looks, money and popularity that it would be easy to find the perfect guy, but no such luck.
Nevertheless you didn’t let it get you down. You knew you’d find someone good enough eventually.
Certainly someone better than the miserable man who was currently standing outside the door of your room.
You sniffed with thinly veiled disgust as you noticed his leather jacket haphazardly slung over the back of the chair parked outside your bedroom door.
As you passed by you noticed he smelled faintly of cigarettes and warm, woodsy cologne. Not a scent that your delicate sensibilities were used to, but not one that was entirely unpleasant.
Regardless, you walked past him with your nose in the air, not acknowledging him, and swiftly closed your bedroom door behind you.
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Eddie had been between jobs when his friend Rick convinced him to come on board as extra security on his team. Rick had started managing a private security company after getting out of the drug running game.
Business for the most part was good, except that Hopper kept poaching Rick’s recruits as soon as he got them trained. Every two-bit hick in Hawkins who knew how to hold a gun wanted to be a hot shot cop, it seemed. At least Rick had no worry of that happening with Eddie, as the metalhead held a special sort of disdain for law enforcement.
Rick had convinced Eddie to take the gig by telling him that he had a high-powered client willing to pay through the nose for extra security around his home. And how could Eddie resist the cash when he heard that all had to do was sit around and watch some rich guy’s spoiled daughter all day? Piece of cake.
Rick was thrilled when Eddie had agreed to work with him. A lot of people in Hawkins were frightened of Eddie due to (untrue) rumors that had been spread about him in his youth. Rick knew he could use that fear to his advantage with Eddie working on his team, not to mention the fact that Eddie cut a somewhat intimidating figure. After graduating from high school, Eddie had spent the years doing some form of physical labor, and he had the physique to prove it.
Eddie may have been an outcast in high school, but now as an adult he had become something of a ladies man. Over the years he had earned himself quite the reputation amongst the female population of Hawkins.
The truth was, Eddie had never found anyone that kept his interest long enough for him to stick around for more than a quick fuck. And sometimes, even when some hot chick was blissed out, bouncing on his thick cock, all could think about was the fact that she would never have given him a second look in high school.
Eddie knew the women he slept with only wanted him now that he had a reputation for having a nice dick and skills in the sack, so he just used them back. Fair’s fair.
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As soon as Eddie arrived at your house, and got a load of you, he could tell you were going to be a real piece of work. He knew your type - spoiled rotten and thought the world revolved around you.
After you walked past him into your bedroom without acknowledging his presence, he shook his head and grinned bitterly. You were really living up to the whole pampered princess persona.
He waited a few minutes, debating whether or not he should knock and introduce himself but decided against it. He figured you’d have to come out again eventually. What he wasn’t anticipating was that your staff brought everything you needed to you in your room, completely at your beck and call.
After another hour passed with no sign of you emerging, Eddie decided he would knock on your door, introduce himself and be done with it. He knocked gently on your bedroom door, and heard you call for him to come in.
When he opened the door it was like he was punched in the face by hyperfemininity. Your room was covered from floor to ceiling in white lace, pink frills and satin sheets.
He looked over at the bed where you were sitting and slowly drank in your form. You looked fresh from the shower, wrapped in only a plush white bathrobe. He could smell the soft, floral scent of your soap lingering in the air.
You lifted your head from the magazine you were reading and surveyed him with a bored expression, before lowering your gaze back down to the glossy page.
“So you’re the new one?” you asked without looking up.
Your voice snapped Eddie out of his trance. All the pink lace and sweet smells were overpowering his senses, and the sight of you amongst it all was messing with his mind.
“Yeah, I’m Eddie”, he said extending his hand. “I thought I’d better introduce myself since I’m going to be…”
“Watching me?” you interrupted as you started to turn the pages of your magazine more aggressively. You let out a huff and rolled your eyes.
“Well that’s great, Eddie. But if you don’t mind I’m very busy.” You gestured to your magazine still not looking up. Then you waved your hand at him in a shooing motion, dismissing him from your presence.
Eddie gritted his teeth and then bit his lower lip in amused disbelief. He brought his rejected hand back down to his side, shaking his head as he turned to walk out of the room.
“Don’t forget to close the do-”, you chirped out as he slammed it shut with a loud bang.
You glared at the door as if your eyes could burn a hole through him on the other side.
Who did that guy think he was? Nobody who worked for you had ever dared slam a door on you before. You made a mental note to mention the little episode to your father.
You tried to focus on your magazine but found it hopeless, so you flung it onto the floor with a heavy sigh. The whole interaction with Eddie was really having an awful effect on your mood. Your insides were twisting with what you decided was probably annoyance. Maybe you just needed to cheer yourself up with some self care.
You pulled open your bedside drawer and bit on your lower lip as you debated which stress reliever to choose. You eventually settled on your small pink bullet vibrator, and then sat back against your plush velvet pillows to get comfortable.
When you brought the vibrator down to your underwear you were surprised to find you were already wet. As your hand brushed against the material you could feel the damp heat between your thighs. That was a bit strange, but you assumed it was just a symptom of how you had been neglecting yourself for the past few days. That had to be it.
You clicked the on button, and slipped the vibrator under your panties. As you started to feel small waves of pleasure at the rhythmic pulsations you tried to focus your thoughts on Chad, your new tennis instructor with his athletic build and bright smile. But all you could think about was Eddie.
Eddie with his dark curls, woodsy scent and deep brown eyes.
You thought about him standing at the edge of your bed in his heavy boots with you spread out beneath him. His large ring-covered fingers wrapped around your throat, as he thrust deeply into you over and over.
Before you knew it you were cumming so hard it almost shocked you. You cried out as your walls fluttered and your body practically exploded with pleasure. You hadn’t cum that hard in ages and it left you panting to catch your breath.
What the hell was that?
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Meanwhile in the hallway, Eddie had been sitting on his chair outside of your room, fuming about what a nightmare you had turned out to be.
He scoffed at the memory of how you had dismissed him from your room with a wave of your hand like he was some kind of errant pet. Unbelievable.
The house had been eerily silent all day, so when Eddie suddenly heard the low hum of a vibration coming from the other side of your door he couldn’t help but be curious. He stood up and put an ear against the door to listen.
At first it sounded like a pair of clippers or other electronic device. He wondered what kind of fancy rich-person gadget you were probably using. But then Eddie heard you let out a faint moan. And then you moaned again, only louder the second time. Eddie had been around the block enough times to know what was going on.
Holy shit.
You were getting yourself off on the other side of the door from where he had been sitting. From where he could walk in at any moment.
Eddie’s cock stiffened at the thought, and he had to adjust the crotch of his pants to relieve some of the pressure. What kind of game were you playing, anyway?
Despite himself, he couldn’t help but picture you in your room, laid out on those satin sheets with your fluffy robe pulled open and your fingers-
He rubbed a hand down his face in frustration. He couldn’t think about you that way, especially not there. You were his boss’s daughter, not to mention a huge pain in the ass. He had to get it together.
Eddie walked back to his chair and sat down, trying desperately to think of anything other than you and whatever was going on behind that door.
He stayed there until his shift ended at midnight, and in that time you never once came back outside your room.
By the time he had handed things off to the guard on night duty and left to go home to his trailer, you were already stretched out and blissfully asleep in your large, comfy bed.
That night you slept better than you had in months.
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Thank you for reading! See you in Part 2 💗 Read here
dividers by @saradika-graphics
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shelternmberone · 1 month
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day/night
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chvoswxtch · 3 months
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teach me
pairing: frank castle x fem!reader
summary: you want frank to teach you self defense, but it doesn't quite go the way you expected.
warnings: swearing, some angst, mentions of guns, explicit sexual content (minors dni)
word count: 8.3k
a/n: what better way to end this year and start the new one than with our favorite hot bodyguard. don't ask me how many times I watched that scene with him and amy. it was for science. as always, feedback is welcomed/appreciated!
[previous chapter] | [next chapter] | [series masterlist]
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“You’re being a dick.”
“Hey, you said you wanted to learn.”
“You’re still being a dick.”
“Yeah yeah, you ain’t gettin’ no sympathy from me, sweetheart. Now c’mon, try again.”
It was a good thing the cabin was isolated in the middle of the woods, because if anyone had been looking in the living room window at that very moment, they would’ve definitely called the police in horror. Frank had a gun in his right hand that was trained on you, and while he wore a neutral expression on his face, your brows were furrowed in pure annoyance and there was a faint scowl on your lips.
Letting out a huff of irritation, you kept your eyes focused on the gun in Frank’s hand, getting back into somewhat of a fighting stance again. Clenching your hands open and closed a few times, your teeth sank down into your bottom lip before you suddenly rushed forward in an endeavor to take the gun out of his hand. 
But just like he had done the past seven times you tried this, Frank easily managed to block your attempt. He grabbed your wrist in his free hand and spun you around swiftly, pulling you back firmly against his chest while a deep chuckle sounded right next to your ear.
“That was real cute.”
Letting go of you, Frank took a step back and lightly pressed at the back of your knee with the heel of his boot, sending you down to your knees below him. He decided to take it a step further and used the toe of his boot to gently shove at your ass, causing your hands to fly out to catch yourself, rendering you on all fours in front of him. Turning to narrow your eyes at him over your shoulder, the smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth let you know that was very intentional.
“You know, if you wanted me on my knees, all you had to do was ask.”
“That right?”
Grumbling a string of curses under your breath, you pushed yourself back up onto your feet and turned around to shoot a death glare in Frank’s direction. His plush lips instantly parted into a crooked grin while he looked at you, cocking his head to the side slightly while his eyes twinkled in amusement.
“Aw, what’s wrong baby, hm?”
“I already told you, you’re being a dick. You’re supposed to be teaching me-”
“Then why don’t you quit actin’ like you know everythin’ and start askin’ questions, yeah?”
“How the hell am I supposed to know what questions to ask? I asked you to teach me. Teach me means tell me what to do.”
“And when have you ever done what I told ya to?”
As you opened your mouth to protest, Frank arched one of his thick brows and shot you a pointed look, and your rebuttal quickly died on your tongue. You did have a history of ignoring his instructions completely and doing whatever you wanted anyway. With that in mind, you let out a deep exhale through your nose and crossed your arms over your chest.
“Okay, that’s…fair. But this is completely out of my area of expertise. I have no idea what I’m doing. I’ve never even held a gun until four days ago. And for the record, when it comes to something serious, I do listen to you. This is serious, and I’m listening.”
Originally when you asked Frank to teach you self defense with a gun, he was completely against it. He made the argument that with him around, you wouldn’t have to worry about that, to which you reminded him of the incident where two people tried to kill you in your own home where you had nothing to protect yourself with and no knowledge of how to in the first place. 
The two of you went back and forth about it for at least an hour. He made the case that it was a one time incident that would never happen again, and argued that nothing was ever going to happen to you in the first place anyway because he showed up to take care of it. You argued back that Frank wouldn’t be by your side twenty-four seven anymore and would eventually be assigned to someone else, possibly taking him far away for extended periods of time.
In the end, you wore him down like you usually did until he gave in and you got your way.
Frank took in the impatient and stubborn expression covering your features, the one he had become all too familiar with and grown to adore. You were a force to be reckoned with when you wanted something, just as much as he was. Even though he didn’t want you to ever have a reason to use a gun, he would rather know you were safe and could handle yourself in his absence if it came down to it. 
“Alright, alright. Wipe that pout off your face and c’mere.”
Doing your best to conceal your tiny smile of victory, you went to stand in front of Frank, but he held his large hand out to stop you and motioned for you to move back a little.
“Keep your distance, okay? You don’t wanna be too close. Now, step one.”
Frank reached out to grab your wrist and brought your hand up towards the barrel of the gun, placing his large hand on top of your own and squeezing gently to signal for you to grab onto it. Once he felt your tight grip on the barrel, he slid his hand over to grab onto your forearm and pushed against it, which caused the gun in his right hand to shift directions. It was no longer aimed at you, but pointed at the wall to your left.
“You wanna take the gun offline, yeah? Look.”
Glancing up at him briefly, you nodded to show him that you were paying attention. When he pulled your arm back in the position it was before, aiming the gun at you once again, you quickly redirected your focus back to his large hands. To reiterate what he was trying to explain to you, Frank repeated his demonstration two more times to make sure you understood.
“Offline, right? Offline, right? And push hard, as hard as you can.”
While Frank’s eyes were locked on you as he demonstrated the first step, you were studying his movements, committing every detail to memory. It seemed simple enough in theory so far. Keep your distance, grab the barrel of the gun, and push it away from yourself hard. When he let go of your arm, you let go of the gun, and you looked up to see that Frank was already watching you.
“Show me.”
Without hesitating, you swiftly reached out to grab the barrel of the gun and forcefully pushed it to the left. Frank let you redirect it to a certain point, and then pushed back to hold the gun in place. His strength was something you couldn’t combat, and as you kept pushing at the barrel, his resistance  made the gun almost wobble in your hands. 
“Attagirl. Easy, easy. Relax.”
Frank reached out with his left hand and grabbed onto your wrist, gently squeezing it to steady your hand.
“Alright, now step two, you go for that wrist, yeah? You get control. Go.”
Immediately you reached out with your right hand to wrap your fingers around Frank’s wrist to grab onto it tightly. Giving a slight shake of his head, Frank pulled your hand off of his wrist and guided it underneath his wrist instead.
“Look, underneath, yeah? Underneath. Go for the joint. Joints are weakest.”
Everything Frank was showing you seemed so simple that it filled you with a false sense of confidence. With your right hand under his right wrist, you gripped onto the barrel tightly with your left hand and took a step back as you tried to tug it away, thinking it would spring loose. Frank let out a grunt of disapproval and pulled his right arm back, easily slipping the gun out of your grasp completely and causing you to stumble forward a bit. He had a somewhat stern look on his face as he wagged the gun in your direction twice.
“Easy, bang bang. Don’t ever pull a gun towards you. You push it away.”
Letting out a huff of annoyance as your previous overzealous confidence fizzled out, you looked up at Frank as he held his left hand out towards you to signal for you to stay in place. He wasn’t teasing you anymore like he had been earlier. This wasn't Frank that had made you strawberry pancakes and caressed your legs while they sat in his lap as the two of you shared breakfast this morning. This was Frank that nearly sent your ex to the morgue instead of prison. He was back in full protective bodyguard mode.
“Listen to me. Use your legs, get underneath, and twist. Don’t pull, twist. Yeah? C’mon, show me.”
Taking a deep breath, you gave a slight nod and went over the steps in your head. Grab the barrel of the gun, shove it away from yourself, slip your other hand under the wrist joint, and twist the gun away. Your lips faintly twitched as you silently recited the steps to yourself three times for good measure. Frank didn’t make a move to rush you. He kept his eyes on you and waited patiently until you were ready to give it a try. 
Sucking in one more deep breath, your tongue darted out to wet your lips, and you sprung into action. Taking a quick step forward, you reached out to tightly grab the barrel of the gun with your left hand, and while you pushed it away to the left, you simultaneously slipped your right hand under Frank’s wrist. Twisting the barrel of the gun forcefully to the right caused Frank’s wrist to twist with it until he was forced to let go, and in that short window of weakness you were able to pull the gun out of his hand with a hard step backwards.
Glancing down at the gun in your hands, your eyes went wide with surprise and your mouth hung open as you let out an incredulous laugh. 
“Holy shit, that actually worked!”
Frank held his hands up like you had just made a touchdown, and he started to clap as a proud tooth bearing grin stretched over his lips.
“Look at that, huh? Who got a gun, huh?”
Looking up at Frank, your lips parted into a huge grin of your own while you held it up like a trophy and spoke in a proud voice.
“I have a gun.”
“Attagirl. You’re goddamn right you do. You did good, sweetheart. Real good. Feels good, yeah?”
Biting down on your bottom lip, you let out a soft laugh while admiring the gun in your hands. Well, more so admiring the fact that you were able to actually take it from Frank. The only reason you felt comfortable holding the gun right now was because Frank had shown you the clip was empty before he started demonstrating the basics earlier. 
Pointing a loaded gun at Steven had been different. You were blinded in a fit of rage, not thinking clearly, but deep down you knew there was no way you would have actually pulled the trigger. However if you had been level headed, you probably wouldn’t have taken it from Billy, even if he offered. 
“Yeah…yeah it does.”
And it did feel good. It made you feel strong…less helpless. Frank was giving you back a sense of safety and security that had been stolen from you when you were first threatened by the Defenders of Freedom. Even if you never used this lesson, and you genuinely hoped you wouldn’t have to, you felt a surge of confidence knowing that you were at least capable of protecting yourself in some capacity. 
“Okay, step three.”
A pinch of confusion settled between your brows as you looked up at Frank when he mentioned a third step, and you noticed that he wasn’t smiling anymore. A grim look had settled over his features that sent a chill of unease down your spine.
“You just took a gun off someone that wanted to use it on you. What d’you do.”
The delight of pride had disappeared from his face and was swiftly replaced by a shadow of severity that was now coveting his sharp features, and the elated grin that was on your own lips had slowly fallen from grace. It was a rhetorical question you both knew the answer to, but you hadn’t factored in a third step. It hadn’t even crossed your mind, and Frank could see that in your eyes.
“You use it on them. Don’t matter who they are, you do not hesitate. You got that?”
Looking down at the gun in your hands, the weight of it was suddenly too heavy in your palms. Step three was a reminder that step one and two weren’t just to boost your confidence in protecting yourself; they were steps to defend yourself. Swallowing thickly, you nodded your head in silent understanding.
“Good. Show me.”
Frank’s voice was quiet, barely above a whisper. It wasn’t a command, but it wasn’t a suggestion either. Placing both of your hands on the gun the way he had shown you to properly hold it, you took a deep breath, slowly raising it to aim in Frank’s direction. You weren’t sure if it was the fact that he knew the clip was empty, or that this most likely wasn’t the first time he had stared down the barrel of a gun, but he looked completely unphased. The canvas of his face was expressionless, but his eyes were what you had learned to read. Only right now, you couldn’t understand what they were trying to tell you. 
The gun trembled slightly in your grasp, as if every cell in your body knew exactly how wrong it felt to point a gun at Frank, loaded or not. The self defense lesson you wanted for a possible yet highly improbable scenario had quickly become too heavy and realistic, and you were quickly regretting even asking for it.
“Show me.”
“I’m not doing that-”
“It ain’t loaded-”
“Frank, I don’t want to-”
“What’d I say, huh? I don’t care who it is, you do not hesitate. Ever. Now, show me you understand.”
Frank’s tone was a little more forceful, but the volume of it was still even and somewhat soft. You knew there were no repercussions if you didn’t pull the trigger. He had learned early on that he couldn’t make you do anything you didn’t want to, and you trusted him enough to know that he would never try to force you. Frank never demanded anything of you, he always asked.
But you had asked for this, and he wanted you to follow through with it.
Clenching your jaw, you let out a shaky exhale through your nose, and you slowly squeezed the trigger like he had taught you to yesterday when you were out in the woods using cans as target practice. The click that sounded caused you to flinch, and it seemed to echo loudly in the living room. Frank on the other hand didn’t visibly react to it at all.
Without another word, you placed the gun down onto the coffee table a little too forcefully and headed towards the back door, wanting to put as much distance between it and yourself as possible. Frank caught your wrist before you could get too far and gently tugged you back towards himself.
“Hey-”
“I’m going for a walk.”
“No, you ain’t. You ain’t runnin’ away, you’re gonna stay here and talk to me. We ain’t doin’ that not communicatin’ shit. Why are you upset?”
“I told you I didn’t want to do that-”
“You asked me to teach you. I said no, but you kept on beggin’. What did you think this was gonna be, huh? You think you get a gun off someone, and it ends there? No. As soon as you get control and take it, you use it. No negotiatin’, no questionin’ it, you do it-”
“And what if I can’t, Frank?”
The distress in your voice made him pause and clench his jaw. He could see that you were visibly upset, and for a moment he wondered if he was being too hard on you. You said it yourself, this was not your area of expertise. It was his. Frank had years of professional training under his belt. Pulling a trigger was something he didn’t even have to think twice about. It was an automatic response. The aftermath of what followed didn’t even make him bat an eye. There were always casualties in war. 
But you weren’t a soldier, and having to actually pull the trigger on someone would be something that haunted you for the rest of your life if it came down to it.
Letting out a deep exhale through his large nose, Frank stepped forward and wrapped one of his arms around your waist to pull you into his embrace while using his other hand to slip his fingers gently into your hair to brush it back before cradling your face in his right hand.
“Listen to me. If it comes down to you, or someone else, you do whatever you gotta do to save yourself, you got that?”
The rational part of your brain knew that Frank was right. If you had taken a gun from Cavella or Walker, you would’ve had to shoot them. There’s no way they wouldn’t have missed the opportunity to kill you if they had it. But the emotional part of your brain was struggling to figure out if you could handle the consequences of taking someone’s life, justified or not. Frank could see the internal conflict in your eyes, and he lightly brushed the calloused pad of his thumb along your cheekbone as the rough timbre of his voice broke the tense silence.
“Hey, no one’s sayin’ you gotta shoot ‘em point blank, alright? I’ve seen your aim, and it ain’t all that great anyway. You’d be lucky to scare ‘em off with firin’ a terrible shot just so you could get away.”
Rolling your eyes at his comment, you let out a dry laugh. As much as you wanted to be annoyed, he was right. You were terrible. You didn’t hit a single can yesterday, even at close range. You did manage to scare the shit out of some crows in a tree though.
“You are such an ass.”
The edge of Frank’s mouth twitched up into a light smirk while giving your waist a gentle squeeze.
“And you’re cute thinkin’ you could actually do some damage. I know a blind guy that can hit targets better than you. Look, you gotta stop gettin’ upset ‘bout things that might not even happen, alright? If it ever comes down to it, remember that you’re the one controllin’ the gun, yeah? It ain’t controllin’ you. Wherever you aim, the bullet’s gonna go. You can shoot ‘em in the leg, foot, shoulder, hell shoot ‘em in the dick for all I care. That’ll keep ‘em down for a while. You just promise me you’ll pull that trigger. You get ‘em down however you want, and then you get the hell outta there. That’s all you gotta do, yeah?”
Frank dipped his head to catch your eyes, staring intently into them. Letting out a deep breath, you bit down on your bottom lip and nodded while placing your hands on Frank’s biceps. You could do that. Injuring someone just to get away was a lot more manageable for your conscience. Frank lightly grasped your jaw in his large hand, his bottom three fingers wrapping around your throat while his index finger and thumb held your jaw. He tipped your head back so that you had no choice but to look up at him.
“Lemme hear you say it.”
Staring up into his warm brown eyes, you gazed up at him silently for a moment before speaking.
“No hesitating. I promise.”
“Attagirl. C’mere.”
Frank leaned in to capture your lips in a soft and sweet kiss. Sometimes it amazed you how easily he was able to talk you down from the ledge. Frank was a man of few words, but he somehow always knew exactly which ones to say to ease whatever anxieties were weighing on your mind. And the distraction of his plush lips against yours also certainly helped.
Ever since the other night by the fireplace, every kiss between the two of you that started out soft and sweet had a way of evolving into something more passionate and insatiable. Maybe it was the months of denying your feelings for one another, or maybe there was just some magnetic pull between your souls, but whatever it was, neither of you could get enough.
Before you could even register that you were moving, Frank was lifting you up by your hips and setting you down on the dining table, his hungry kisses leaving a searing path along your jawline and down the column of your neck.
“Did good today, sweetheart. Did real goddamn good, made me so proud.”
Frank’s gravely songs of praise in your ear only further ignited the flame of desire that was burning in your lower belly. Despite the warmth of his large palm touching your bare skin as he slipped it underneath your shirt to caress your lower back, a shiver teasingly tumbled down your spine from the contact.
“I had a good teacher.”
“Nah, I think you’re just a natural, baby.”
“I thought I had terrible aim?”
“Didn’t say you were perfect. Everybody’s got their strengths and weaknesses.”
A soft laugh escaped your lips before you could stop it, and you could feel the rumble of Frank’s deep chuckle vibrating in his chest that was pressed against yours.
“Wow, you really know how to sweep a girl off her feet, Castle.”
Frank pulled back slightly to look down at you, his eyes traveling over your figure to drink in the sight of you sitting on the edge of the dining table before they slowly wandered back up to meet your gaze. He arched one of his thick brows as a smug smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth.
“Yours are currently danglin’, sweetheart.”
Before you could retort with a smartass comment of your own, Frank’s mouth was back on your neck, leaving open mouthed kisses along your sensitive skin. Feeling his tongue gliding along your collarbone and giving it a delectable love bite, you closed your eyes and let your head fall back, granting Frank all the access he wanted to your skin.
The feeling of his lips on your neck was so heavenly you almost didn’t notice that he had popped the button on your jeans and tugged down your zipper until he was lifting you up slightly with one arm around your waist and pulling the denim down your hips with his free hand. As soon as your jeans were completely off, your own hands were reaching for Frank’s belt buckle, but he grasped your wrists and halted your attempt. A soft noise of protest quickly slipped past your lips.
“Frank-”
“Shh shh shh. Spread your legs for me, baby.”
A rush of heat pooled in your cheeks at his request, but you obliged immediately. Frank leaned in to kiss you deeply, swiping his tongue along your bottom lip and nipping at it softly while his thumbs hooked into the waistband of your panties and slipped them off too slowly for your liking. The sudden contact of the crisp autumn air coming in through the open windows hitting your slicked folds had you gasping, and Frank used that to his advantage by slipping his tongue into your mouth to caress your own sensually. 
“Spread ‘em wider for me, sweetheart. C’mon.”
Frank’s deep voice was quiet, but it nestled in your ears as comfortably as it did between your thighs. He pulled you a little more towards the edge of the dining table, and when you spread your legs further for him, he sank down to his knees in front of you and let out a low groan of appreciation at the sight waiting for him. 
“Attagirl, that’s it. God, look at you. You should see how fuckin’ pretty you look right now, baby.”
His large hands gripped onto your soft thighs, kneading and squeezing your flesh with his thick fingers. Frank didn’t waste a second before diving into your cunt face first. As soon as his warm and wet tongue began to strum your clit like chords to his favorite song, your eyes nearly rolled into the back of your head. He brought your legs over his broad shoulders, burying his face so deep into your core, you weren’t sure how he was breathing.
Your hand quickly found a fistful of his slightly grown out hair that you gripped onto to steady yourself, and when you gave it an experimental tug, the vibration of his groan against your clit had your thighs trembling more than any toy you had ever gotten for yourself before.
“Fuck…Frank…”
Frank let out a loud grunt as he pulled back for just a moment to stare at your glistening pussy almost in awe, his hooded eyes briefly meeting your own for a second before focusing back on the display of your desire for him.
“Taste so good sweetheart, so fuckin’ good. You got no idea how long I’ve wanted to do this.”
He dove right back in, this time slipping his tongue inside of you to explore while using his large nose to bump against your clit repeatedly. The stimulation had your back arching off the dining table and a loud moan echoed throughout the cabin. Tugging harder at his dark roots, you pushed your hips up against his face, desperately and greedily searching for more. None of your exes had ever eaten you out like this before. Most of them didn’t even know what the fuck they were doing, and the rest gave up after a few minutes because it “took too long”, but still expected you to suck them off until your jaw ached.
But Frank…God, Frank knew what he was doing. His thick fingers were digging into the soft flesh of your thighs, following your hips wherever they went. The groans that continued to vibrate against your clit not only turned you on because of their stimulation, but because you could tell that Frank was genuinely enjoying eating your pussy. The fact that he was getting just as much pleasure out of it as you were had you on the brink of an orgasm alone. Frank had a way of making every experience feel brand new, and it made you realize just how much you had been missing out on in your previous relationships.
That familiar bubbly feeling was building up inside of you, cresting slowly like a tidal wave ready to wreak havoc on an unsuspecting beach. Your breaths were coming out in short staccato variations, and at this point you were roughy tugging at Frank’s hair with both hands while essentially fucking his face. Not that he seemed to mind at all. If anything, it just seemed to make him more feral.
“Yesyesyesyes…please-fuck, Frank…I…I…”
Frank pulled you even closer towards the edge of the dining table to where your ass was basically hanging off of it, and the jolt of his large palm smacking against your ass was the only indication you got that he understood what you were trying to tell him.
You thought you had more time, but your climax suddenly crashed into you without further warning, and your hips were stuttering as Frank continued his incessant assault on your pussy with his tongue. It seemed like he didn’t want to let a drop of your essence go to waste, and while you appreciated his enthusiasm, the way he was flicking his tongue rapidly against your overstimulated clit was riding that very thin line between pain and pleasure, and you were weakly shoving at his broad shoulders.
“Okay okay okay…Frank…fuck, please! Just…give me a second, God-”
Frank dragged his tongue up your entire pussy from your entrance to your clit one last time before granting you mercy with a low growl. While you panted heavily laying back against the dining room table, he was pressing featherlight kisses to each of your inner thighs, but due to your body feeling like a live wire, they felt like faint shocks that had your body jolting every time his wet lips met your heated skin. He chuckled deeply watching you respond to his touch.
“You alright there, sweetheart?”
Lifting your hand, you gave him a weak thumbs up, and Frank just laughed even louder in amusement at that. The sound of his laughter combined with your own blissed out post orgasm state had a lazy grin stretching over your lips. You felt his large and rough hands slipping underneath your shirt, gently caressing your bare skin and grabbing your waist while he leaned over you, kissing your lips deeply. The taste of your own sweet tang on Frank’s tongue had your head spinning, and a soft hum sounded in the back of your throat.  Even though you were still recovering from your first ever oral orgasm, the feeling of Frank’s hard cock straining against his jeans and rubbing against your inner thigh reignited your greed.
Brushing your hand slowly down his chest, you palmed him firmly through his jeans, and Frank let out a grunt while pushing himself further against your hand. He broke the kiss momentarily to nuzzle his large nose against your throat.
“If ya need a minute-”
“No. Now.”
While you unfastened his belt in record time, Frank placed his hands on the table on either side of your head and pulled back to look down at you with a soft chuckle at your impatience. He lightly cocked his head to the side, his brown eyes darkened with lust as they roamed over you shamelessly. His tongue darted out to wet his bottom lip, and a crooked smirk caressed his mouth.
“Anybody ever tell you what an impatient lil thing you are?”
A smirk of your own tugged across your lips while you slipped your hand into his jeans, stroking his thick cock through his briefs, earning a quiet grunt from Frank.
“Apart from you every day since we met? Maybe a few other people. Is my lack of patience really what you wanna talk about right now, big guy?”
The sultry tone of your voice did not go unnoticed by Frank, and in fact, it only made his cock swell even more in your welcoming hand. He slowly moved his hips back and forth as you teasingly stroked him and leaned down closer towards you, nuzzling his nose along your throat before whispering huskily into your ear.
“Got somethin’ better in mind.”
By the time Frank had carried you down the hall to the master bedroom, the two of you had left a trail of forgotten items of clothing strewn like breadcrumbs along the path from the kitchen. He let you push him back against the mattress and grabbed your hips to pull you on top of him, his lips moving in sync with your own, but when you felt the swollen head of his cock bump against your clit, you suddenly pressed your palms firmly against his chest and pulled back while breaking the kiss.
“Wait.”
Frank immediately paused, loosening his grip on your hips, his lust clouded eyes clearing a bit while searching your own and wandering over your figure for the source of the problem.
“What? What’s wrong, sweetheart?”
The concern in his rough timbre combined with the worry in his soft brown eyes made your heart melt. A gentle smile covered your lips while you reached out to delicately hold his strong jaw in your hands, and you leaned in to kiss his lips softly.
“Nothing’s wrong. I just don’t think it’s fair you get to have all the fun.”
Frank’s apprehension morphed into confusion, and a few creases nestled between his thick brows. 
“Huh?”
Letting out a soft laugh at how adorable he looked when he was confused, you decided to explain with actions instead of words. When you moved backwards off his lap to settle between his legs, Frank raised himself up on his elbows, following you with his eyes as he watched you intently. 
“What are you-holy shit.”
Frank’s jaw went slack the second you leaned in and wrapped your lips around the head of his cock, swirling your tongue around it once before beginning to take a few inches into your mouth. Placing one of your hands on his left hip, you teasingly moved your lips up his length until he was out of your mouth with a satisfying pop. Pursing your lips, you let a string of glistening saliva slowly drop onto his tip and used your free hand to spread it down the rest of his thick cock for lubrication, and after wrapping your fingers around his girth, you began to twist your wrist up and down slowly. 
You could feel how tense he was through your hold on his hip. Glancing up at him through your lashes, you noticed that he was staring directly at you, completely mesmerized, and was gripping onto the sheets so tightly you thought he might rip them. Moving your hand from his hip, you reached out to caress his hand, and he slowly loosened his grip, his knuckles no longer stark white. His plush lips were parted, and he was breathing hard, his thick brows knit in complete focus. You allowed him to slip out of your mouth for just a moment to smile softly up at Frank.
“Just relax.”
The sweet sound of your voice seemed to reach his ears, and after a few more moments of hesitation, Frank finally laid back against the mattress and let his head rest on the pillows. He moved the hand that was underneath yours to grab your wrist, turning your hand over so he could slot his fingers between yours to hold it. His other hand slowly came over to card his fingers through your hair before cradling the back of your head. Giving his hand that you were holding a light squeeze, you continued to hold eye contact with Frank while slowly sucking him off, using your hand that was around his base to work over what wouldn’t fit in your mouth.
The sound of his quiet grunts and low moans sent a thrill through you, and you wanted to know just how vocal he could get. Letting go of his hand, you placed both of your palms firmly on his hips and relaxed your jaw completely, taking his entire cock into your mouth until his tip hit the back of your throat. A guttural groan ripped from the depth of his chest and his lower abdomen instantly tensed up as he gripped onto your hair.
“Goddamn-fuck…fuck, sweetheart. Do…do that again. Please…please baby, do it again.”
Taking in a deep inhale through your nose, you prepared yourself to deepthroat Frank’s thick cock again, and this time you held him there until your eyes started to water. He let out a louder moan of your name, and that caused the throbbing between your thighs to evolve from dull to downright unbearable. You thought about sneaking your hand downwards to get a little relief, but Frank had been so unselfish when he ate you out, only focused on your pleasure, and he deserved that same treatment. 
All of a sudden, Frank roughly tugged at your hair, and that made you moan around his cock. You heard him let out a quiet fuck under his breath in response. He gave your hair another tug to get your attention, and his cock slipped from your lips as you licked them and tried to catch your breath while staring at him, noticing that he had sat up.
“C’mere.”
He didn’t give you a chance to protest before he grabbed your throat and pulled you in close to kiss you fervently. Frank’s large and rough hands grabbed your hips and pulled you onto his lap again, and you let out a soft whine against his lips when the head of his cock rubbed against your sensitive clit. 
“Frank, I didn’t get to finish-”
“As much as I’d love to come down that pretty throat, I need ya baby. Need ya now.”
Grabbing the base of his cock, Frank positioned himself perfectly with your entrance and pulled you down slowly, letting you feel every single inch of him. Your mouth hung open at the sensation, and your body instantly tensed up. You thought Frank had been deep the other night, but he was reaching an even greater depth inside of you right now if that was possible. There was a slight burn as your walls stretched to accommodate his size, but your brain barely even registered it, because Frank was slipping his tongue into your mouth and kissing you sensually as if he wanted to steal the very essence of life from your lungs. 
Once he was fully nestled deep inside of you, a high pitched cry left your mouth, and he wrapped his arm around your waist tightly.
“Shh…s’alright. Just relax for me, sweetheart.”
Wrapping your arms around his neck, you clung to Frank as he wrapped both of his strong arms around your waist and held you tightly against his chest. Both of you sat there for a moment, your foreheads pressed together as you panted. He rubbed his large calloused hand up and down your spine soothingly, his teeth grazing along your ear lobe and biting down gently to distract you from any discomfort. Slowly, the tension in your body melted, and you gave an experimental roll of your hips that had your eyes rolling into the back of your head.
“That’s it…attagirl. Take your time, sweetheart. M’right here. I got you.”
This felt right. It felt…perfect. Those three little words almost slipped out right there. Grabbing onto the back of his neck, you pulled Frank in for a passionate kiss, trying to pour every ounce of emotion you felt into it. He groaned quietly against your lips when your nails lightly scratched at the back of his head where his hair was shaved closely to his scalp. Moving your hips in slow circles, you grinded down onto Frank’s cock, and he flexed his hips upwards to match your rhythm. The other night by the fireplace had been the best experience of your life, but this…this was something you couldn’t put into words.
Placing your palms against Frank’s firm chest, you pressed lightly and he followed your silent instructions, allowing you to push him onto his back. His large hands gripped firmly onto your hips as he gazed up at you, and you kept your palms flat on his chest while slowly riding his cock. Neither of you could tear your eyes away from each other. The feeling of his warm hands leisurely moving up your bare skin made you shiver, and a soft gasp left your lips when he groped your breasts and squeezed gently. The calloused pad of his thumb gingerly brushing over your peaked nipple had you arching your back, pressing your chest further into his eager hands.
“You’re so goddamn beautiful.”
The sincerity in Frank’s vulnerable whisper nearly brought tears to your eyes. He wasn’t saying it because he thought it was what you wanted to hear, he was saying it because he felt it, and he was making you feel it too. The way he was staring up at you like you were the only thing that mattered had your heart swelling inside your ribcage like a balloon about to burst. It had been a long time since you mattered to someone, and you felt lucky it was Frank. The look in his eyes was almost too much to handle.
Letting your head fall back, you closed your eyes for a moment as you writhed on top of Frank, getting completely lost in how good it felt to be connected to him in such a raw and intimate way. One of his hands traveled up from your breast towards your throat, and he wrapped his fingers tightly around it almost entirely, forcing you to face him again. He pulled you down over him so that your forehead was pressed to his, and the two of you stared deeply into each other's eyes. 
“Frank-”
“I wanna see you. Wanna see those pretty eyes when you come for me. Can you do that for me, sweetheart?”
Being this close to him, you noticed for the first time that there were scattered flecks of honey in his deep brown eyes. They looked so warm and inviting, like two melted pools of chocolate you wanted to drown in. The eyes that could say so much with a single look. You thought you could see it…that flicker that he felt it too. You wanted to tell him so fucking badly, but you didn’t want to ruin the moment, and the way he was hitting that spongy spot inside of you that could cause supernovas to appear behind your eyelids was making it hard for you to speak at all.
Holding his face in your hand, your eyes drifted back and forth between his own as you stared down at him in complete devotion, your lips parted as you nodded your head frantically while short and breathy moans escaped you. Frank’s eyes were focused solely on you, one of his hands holding the back of your head while his other remained around your throat. It was getting harder and harder for you to keep your eyes open, but you didn’t want to miss a single second of this moment.
It was also getting harder and harder to not voice the sentiment that was overflowing from your ribcage.
“Frank…I…I-”
Frank cut off your words by capturing your lips in a heated kiss. The softness of his lips against yours, the heat of his bare skin pressed to your own, his thick fingers wrapped around your neck and tangled in your hair, his pubic bone rubbing just right against your clit…it was all too much. Breaking the kiss, you buried your face into the crook of his neck and let out a sharp cry of his name. Your nails raked harshly down his chest when your climax finally peaked, and a white hot cloud of hedonistic desire blinded your vision. 
Your entire body seized up, and you could faintly hear Frank whispering sweet nothings into your ear as he gripped your hips and repeatedly thrust up into you, fucking you through your orgasm while barreling towards his own. The sensation of that alone was enough to nearly send you free falling into another. The intensity of your orgasm had rendered you an incoherent and moaning mess. Frank dug his fingers roughly into the flesh of your hips and came with a deep grunt that nearly sounded like a growl, letting out a loud groan of your name.
The room felt like a sauna. Your face felt overheated, and your hair was stuck to your cheeks and the back of your neck with sweat. Frank had his arms wrapped tightly around your waist, hugging you against his chest. The feeling of his strong heartbeat thundering against your own chest kept you anchored to the moment while your body trembled with aftershocks. You couldn’t move, and you didn’t want to.
As soon as Frank made a move to sit up and pull out of you, a desperate and high pitched whine of protest fell from your lips while you gripped onto his shoulder and dug your nails into the muscle.
“No no no no no, please…don’t move.”
Frank instantly stilled, bringing one of his hands up to brush the sweaty hair stuck to your forehead and neck away. He pressed a lingering kiss to your forehead and gave your body a gentle squeeze in his strong arms.
“Okay, we don’t gotta move yet.”
Letting out a soft sigh of relief, you buried your face further into Frank’s neck, letting the comforting scent of his cologne calm you. He gently carded his thick fingers through your hair and kept holding you tightly to his chest while resting his head against your own.
“I just wanna stay like this for a while.”
“We can stay like this as long as you want, sweetheart.”
When you started to regain your senses, you started to wonder just how true that statement was. 
How long could you and Frank stay like this before reality came knocking?
Your home wouldn’t always be a crime scene. Eventually the two of you would have to go back to work. Now that everything had changed between the two of you, what would a new normal look like? Frank’s job required him to be with someone constantly. What happens when he gets assigned to someone else? What if it’s another woman? Even though Frank was broody and unapproachable initially, you had still found him attractive, and all the time you spent together over the past few months led you right here to this moment.
What if that happened with someone else? What if the next woman he was assigned to found him just as attractive? What if she wanted him? You and Frank hadn’t really established what this was between the two of you. Were you together? Did he want to be together? Would he still want to be together if the next woman was prettier and less stubborn and actually-
“Quit it.”
The sound of his deep voice breaking through the silence interrupted your spiraling. 
“What?”
“Whatever you’re overthinkin’ right now, let it go.”
Removing your face from the crook of Frank’s neck, you pulled back slightly to peer down at him in pure curiosity.
“How do you even-”
“I can practically hear the gears turnin’ in your head, sweetheart. You keep thinkin’ so hard, smoke’s gonna start comin’ out of your ears.”
Giving him a pointed look expressing you weren’t amused, he let out a quiet chuckle and gently brushed the calloused pad of his thumb along your cheekbone.
“C’mon, you ain’t got nothin’ to worry ‘bout right now. Just relax, yeah?”
Letting out a soft sigh, you nodded and laid your head back against Frank’s shoulder, nuzzling your nose against his neck as he hugged onto you tightly. For a while, you two laid there wrapped up in one another, and you were able to let some of your anxieties go. The afterglow of your shared euphoria was peaceful, and you could’ve even fallen asleep at that moment, but something Frank said earlier suddenly popped back into your head. 
“Hey Frank?”
“Hm?”
“Do you really know a blind guy that has a good aim with guns?”
Frank let out a quiet snicker at your question.
“He don’t use guns. He’s too…Catholic.”
That did nothing to answer your question and only fueled you with more inquiries.
“But…you said he could hit targets better than I could.”
Frank simply grunted in response. You stayed silent waiting for further explanation, but when one didn’t come, you continued your questions.
“How?”
“Hell if I know.”
Sitting up a little bit again, you stared down at Frank in complete puzzlement.
“But…he’s blind. That doesn’t make any sense.”
“No it don’t.”
“So…he’s-”
“An asshole. Go to sleep.”
Letting out a soft laugh, your eyes widened slightly as you gently smacked his chest.
“Frank!”
“What? Cause he’s blind he can’t be an asshole?”
“Well…no. But…how does he do it?”
“You’ll have to ask ‘em yourself.”
“I thought Billy was your only friend.”
Frank pulled a look of faux offense at that, his thick brows knit as he let out a puff of air through his lips.
“Ouch. I got other friends, smartass. And I never said he was one. He’s more of a pain in my ass.”
Frank gently pinched your ass which made you squeal before erupting into a fit of laughter.
“Hey!”
A huge grin split across your lips as he suddenly flipped you both over, managing to keep himself nestled inside of you while he pinned you beneath his large body. As he leaned in to kiss your lips, you brought your index finger up and pressed it against his mouth.
“I’m not done. I have more questions.”
“Course you do.”
“I wanna know who this mystery blind man is with good aim, and your other friends that you suddenly have that you’ve kept from me. While you’re at it, is there anything else you’re hiding, Castle?”
While your question was intended to be teasing, a dark look flashed across Frank’s eyes, and it made your breath hitch in your throat. He stared down at you silently for a moment, and it made you wonder just how much more there was to Frank that you hadn’t uncovered yet. As soon as you removed your finger from his lips, Frank leaned in closer, caging you in with his large hands on either side of your head. As he loomed over you, he slowly thrust his hips against your own, pulling a sharp gasp from your chest. His breath was warm against your lips while he nuzzled his large nose along your own, his rough voice coming out in a husky whisper.
“Think I liked you better when the only thing you could say was my name, sweetheart.”
tags: @thyme-in-a-bubble @day-dreaming-goddess @messymissy @itwasthereaminuteago @strawberry1042 @queenofthenoobs @wanda2themax @xcastawayherosx @avengerstower-houseplant @stevenknightmarc @ponyosmom35 @babygal-babygal @wellwwhynot @oldermenaremyreligion @combustiblemeow @tired-night-owl @fairykiss32 @danzer8705 @calkissed @fxckahs-blog @lemon-world1 @polskiperson @imperihoe @v4leoftears @harperdoodle @spideyvibez @joalslibrary @cherry-berry-ollie @sorrowfulfragmentation @kdogreads @sumo-b98 @blackhawkfanatic @gloryekaterina @whistle1whistle @starbritestarlite @callmebrooklynbabes @hallway5 @scarletfvckingwitch @bifuriouslatina @soupyspence @fireeyes-on-teller-dixon-grimes @wonwoosthetic @linguist-breakaribecca @nerdytreeflower @mrs-bellingham @smhnxdiii @s3riou2 @slavic-empress
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augentrust · 4 months
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"essek stays away post-canon because he doesn't want to endanger the nein while he's on the run" absolutely valid, but also i raise you: essek knows about the one (1) time the nein were in charge of protecting an important mage and she survived approximately one week before getting violently murdered while they were — direct quote — "havin' bacon"
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jjsbank444 · 8 months
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Protector (A Bodyguard!Rafe Cameron AU)
Hello my loves! I think this has been my most awaited fic ever? I am so overwhelmed with the number of you who have been waiting excitedly for this, from the moodboard to the teaser, thank you so much. This is my longest, most story-driven work I ever created. I adored writing this and I hope you all enjoy reading it just as much. I took heavy inspiration from the Twisted Series for this (iykyk) so some things may be pretty similar. Any feedback is much appreciated. Lots of love.
Pairing: Bodyguard!Rafe Cameron and Billionaire's daughter!reader Word Count: 14K Warnings: Swearing, mentions of stalking, mentions of violence, mentions of panic attacks. Playlist inspiration
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You anxiously bounced your leg up and down, the slight clicks of your heels matching the sound of the large grandfather clock ahead of you, the noise doing nothing to soothe your spiraling mind.
Sitting inside your father’s office wasn’t new to you, but the circumstances which you found yourself in certainly weren’t something you were familiar with. You tried to find comfort in the dark wooden room, the art on the walls that you had analysed too many times or the empty armchair behind the equally undecorated desk, but the pounding of your heart didn’t slow.
You forced your eyes shut as you mentally counted from one to ten, hoping that by the time the numbers came to a halt, your chest would stop heaving and the situation would resolve itself. Of course, you knew this was false hope.
The sound of low chatter outside the large oak door was yet another confirmation of your reality, as you seethed in a breath, eyes fixated on the door handle, awaiting the verdict of your future.
The door opened with a creak, and you looked up to find your father in his signature button-up shirt and trousers, the outfit he had on since as long as you could remember. His face appeared calm but the crease between his eyebrows was a tell-tale sign of stress as well as his lips which were strained into a smooth line.
He was followed by a man you were unfamiliar with, causing your eyes to widen in shock and anticipation. His frame was huge, much taller than your dad who was nearing his sixties, therefore ending up towering over him. His shoulders were broad and chest strong, which you could easily make out through his black blazer and white shirt. His jawline was sharp and manly, cheekbones sticking out for attention. His hair was buzzed, affirming his hard and ruthless look, a wild contrast to his piercing, ocean blue eyes which should have emitted a soothing look, instead appearing emotionless.
You swallowed hard when his eyes met yours, the lack of anything behind his gaze making you shudder and turn your attention to your father who was shuffling behind his desk and took a seat in front of you. The other man stayed standing, crossing his arm in front of him, as if to await further instructions.
“Sorry to have kept you waiting darling. I trust you had a smooth journey here?” Your father spoke as he looked over at you, sending you a reassuring smile which normally would have quieted your mind, but his words didn’t have the desired effect.
“No problem Papa, I understand you’re busy.” You nodded, carefully following his movements as he pulled out a stack of papers and a series of brown envelopes from his drawer, the sight sending a shiver down your spine as you turned your attention to your hands in your lap.
“Mr Cameron, please take a seat.” Your father spoke again, and linking a name to his face filled you with a sense of satisfaction. You watched as he pulled out the chair next to you and took a seat, slightly bumping his knee with yours, causing an unexpected surge of energy to run through you, as you quickly pulled your leg further away from him.
“Thank you for meeting me at such a short notice.” His attention now turned to Mr Cameron.
“Of course, sir.” He spoke, voice low and husky, perfectly suited to his outside demeanor.
“As you know, my daughter has been receiving threatening messages. The perpetrator is currently unknown, but my team is looking into it as we speak. However, I am having to spend a considerable amount of time travelling for business to various countries in the upcoming months.” He continued, eyes darting between the pair of you, voice serious and pressing, his words making your internal organs ache from the grim truth.
“My daughter’s safety is most important to me. Whoever is following her may be dangerous with bad intentions. It is crucial that she is protected until this individual is revealed.” He followed, attention now diverted to Mr Cameron solely who nodded in understanding and determination.
“Darling, I have hired Rafe Cameron here to be your bodyguard while I am away. He has been briefed and is tasked with looking after you 24/7. He will be taking you to your classes and staying until you are ready to be picked up. I do not want you leaving anywhere without him.” Your father spoke to you, and with each word you felt your breath growing shallower as your pulse picked up. You could feel your hands growing clammy and mind fogging over from the understanding and the weight his words carried.
“A bodyguard!? 24/7? Papa, I’m sure that’s not necessary.” You started warily, not wanting to upset your father or go against his words. The truth is, you were scared. You have been plagued by candid images of yourself, taken on someone’s camera who knew your address and found amusement in posting them to you with enclosed cryptic messages. But the idea of losing your independence completely made you feel like you were suffocating and unable to breathe.
“It absolutely is necessary, and I will not be willing to have a further discussion about this.” He shut you down with a hard gaze, leaving you to nod and divert your attention out the window. Fighting would have been no use, and the lack of sleep from the past week had left you unwilling to burn your energy unnecessarily.
“I will leave you with Mr Cameron who will explain more about the arrangements.” He nodded as he began to stand, signaling that the meeting has officially concluded. Heaps of questions were running through your mind as well as worry and caution. You had no idea what the next months would bring, and the feeling of unknown has brought a sick feeling to your stomach.
You stood up alongside Rafe, who awaited your father to open the door and give him a handshake, followed by the paperwork he had on his desk just a moment ago. You could only imagine the details these held about you, curious to find out and yet not wanting to ask.
“Y/N, just a moment?” You heard your father’s voice urging you to stay inside as he closed the door behind your new bodyguard. You looked up at him expectingly, with a little hardness behind your eyes.
“I know this is a huge ask darling. You are in senior year of college, and I know you don’t want someone to follow you around all the time. But I cannot have something happen to you.” His voice shook a little in fear, the significance of his words throwing you a little, immediately feeling guilty for disapproving of his intentions. You reached out as you gave him a hug and an understanding nod. You clutched your bag and followed out of his office, leaving you to bump into a hard chest, almost sending you stumbling backwards. You found Rafe’s hand around your wrist, steadying your uncontrolled movement as you looked up at him annoyed.
“I understand you have to be close to me Mr Cameron, but perhaps leaving a little room to breathe might be good for us both?” You questioned him with raised eyebrows as you threw your bag over your shoulder and pulled your arm from his grip, turning to strut downstairs towards your car, wanting nothing more than to be in the safe space of your home. Your sudden departure led to you missing the way his eyes twinkled following your words and the way a ghost of a smile hinted at his lips.
You looked around in confusion, trying your best to recite the parking spot you left your car in at the time of your arrival to your father’s office. You groaned in frustration as you walked up and down, cursing yourself because how can someone lose their car so easily!?
“Your car will be waiting for you at your apartment. I’m driving you home.” Came an aggravating voice from beside you, startling you out of your thoughts. Realisation hit as his words sunk in, while you turned to face him with a frown on your face.
“You know, I’m perfectly capable of driving myself.” You stated while crossing your arms to highlight your annoyance.
“I’m sure you are Miss Y/L/N, otherwise you wouldn’t have your license.” He replied smugly as he pulled a car key out of his suit pocket, opening the door to a black range rover beside you. He looked at you expectantly while you weighed your options up. Your apartment was a half an hour drive away from the city and in heels you would not be able to make a single leg of the journey comfortably. With a huff, you threw yourself into the passenger seat and without another look in his direction you waited until he closed the door behind you and walked around to the sit behind the wheel.
He reversed the car smoothly and got on the road, and while you almost questioned how he knew where you lived, you were reminded that he likely knew more about you than you did yourself. You stared out the window as the radio played in the background and you contemplated how you got in this position.
Being a billionaire’s daughter had often led to you being pinpointed in a crowd. People knew your father and labelled you as stuck up and pretentious or wanted to be your friends hoping to be sucked into the lavish lifestyle. You learned from an early stage that people can’t be trusted, keeping most of them at arms-length, only letting a few carefully chosen candidates into your heart. You struggled with dating and making friends, so the idea of someone being so obsessed with you to a point of stalking was unfamiliar and scary.
“I installed cameras and a new alarm system at your apartment before this meeting. I will show you how to access it when we get in.” He interrupted your thoughts, noting how his tone was monotone and professional, cold and reserved at the same time. His words hit you as your eyebrows drew together in sense.
“Wait, hold on. You went into my apartment without anyone telling me?” You looked at him with wide eyes as a huff left your lips.
“Clearly if you are unaware that someone gained access to your home, then we had a problem.” He confirmed, eyes hard on the road.
“That’s not really the point.” You mumbled in a whisper, but you were sure he heard you.
“That’s exactly the point.” He grumbled, sending a glance your way before returning his attention to the scene in front of his eyes.
“I will also need your class schedule. Your father had been unable to provide me with it.” He continued, earning a scoff from you.
“Do I also have to tell you when I go to the toilet?” You asked, sarcasm dripping from your words as you rolled your eyes.
“If it requires you to leave my sight, yes.” He nodded, leaving you dumbfounded and more annoyed than before if that was even possible.
“Fantastic.” You whispered to yourself as you noticed that you were pulling up to your apartment building. You jumped out the second the engine was off and made your way towards the elevator, with Rafe right behind you. You gave a friendly wave to the receptionist whom you have become accompanied with in the past year of your residency.
As soon as you arrived to the top floor, you rummaged around to find your keys, feeling a sense of relief when you found them, ready to get inside your place.
“You won’t need those. New lock.” Rafe muttered as he held out a new, silver key towards you. You paused for a second, debating whether to even question the fact that he changed your lock on his own accord, without your knowledge, but you felt too tired and overwhelmed. You snatched the key from his grasp and entered your home, sighing in relief as you tossed your purse on the nearest countertop and flopped onto your sofa, reaching to pull your heels off in a single movement, throwing them towards your shoe rack.
You leaned back, allowing your head to hit the cushion and closing your eyes for a second, in hopes of forgetting everything. Your blissful state however was interrupted by a cough from Rafe, who you realised was standing in front of you, with an expectant expression.
“You got me back home safely Mr Cameron. I’m sure you are free to go now until I need you?” You asked, the need to curl up in bed and sleep taking over you in a whirlwind.
“Of course. I will be in the spare bedroom if you need me.” He nodded as he looked at you briefly, appearing hard and emotionless, seemingly his natural state of being. Understanding washed over you as you gazed across the room to the spare bedroom, a suitcase waiting on the floor with various shirts hanging off the door hook.
“The spare bedroom? You’re staying here?” You spat out in shock and terror a headache setting in from the number of unexpected turns today has brought you.
“24/7 was the assignment Miss Y/L/N. Your father asked me to be as close as possible, in case your stalker were to try and approach you in your home. So yes, I will be staying here.” He answered crankily, although his expression stayed stoney and you almost felt compelled to see what you have to do to bring any emotion out of him.
“This is ridiculous.” You muttered to yourself, as you buried your face in your hands. “I suppose that means we’re housemates now Mr Cameron. I hope you enjoy watching trashy TV.” You joked as you sent him a teasing smile, trying your best to mask your frustration with sarcasm.
“Let me make something clear Miss Y/L/N.” His tone condescending as he took a step closer to where you sat. “I am your bodyguard, and I will protect you with my life. I am not your friend, and I am not your housemate. I will not get involved in your personal life. You just have to do as I say when it comes to security matters. That is all.” His arrogance fueled something in you, warming you from inside out as you could almost feel smoke evaporating out of you. Instead of dignifying his statement with any reaction, you plastered on a smile and stood up, ready to make your way towards your bedroom.
“Glad we had a nice talk Mr Cameron.” You nodded, smiling. “Make yourself at home.” You opened your arms as you signaled around your living room and without another word, you walked into your room, slamming the door behind you with a little too much spite while you groaned to yourself. That night you fell into bed, eyes pounding with a headache and stomach churning from the events of the day, annoyed and frustrated at the world. And although you had hoped, tomorrow you would wake up and there would be no stalker, no Rafe Cameron and no college to deal with, you shed a tear as you realized you were utterly in the deep end of it all.
Waking up the following morning, you had approximately two seconds of bliss and calm before you heard clatter coming from outside of your door, reminding you that you no longer had the apartment all to yourself. You got up with a sigh and got ready for the day, thanking yourself for prioritizing an en-suite bathroom last year during your flat hunting weeks and took a deep breath before exiting the bedroom.
You found Rafe in the kitchen, leaning against the island with his phone in one hand and a mug in the other, already dressed in his black trousers and dark, navy shirt, seemingly ready for his day.
“Morning.” You offered with a grumble, as you walked towards your coffee machine, to find it has fresh, still hot coffee in it. “Is this for me?” You asked, brows furrowed as you glanced at him.
“I made too much.” He answered diplomatically, making you hum and blush slightly, feeling stupid to have assumed he would purposely make you a drink.
“I have three classes today. I have to get going soon if you’re ready?” You glanced at your phone to check the time, seeing you have approximately fifteen minutes to get going to avoid being late.
He nodded, setting his mug on the kitchen island and waiting for you to grab your belongings to leave your home.
The journey to the college was quiet and slightly awkward, the new routine and person sat next you unfamiliar and creating a sense of unsettlement in you. You knew you would get more looks than usual in your school, with a bodyguard trailing behind you at all times. You had texted your friends in the car to let them know, their reactions full of questions, more so about his appearance than his purpose, making you internally scoff as you suppressed a grin.
“My god, he is hot.” Your friend, Bella squealed as she laid an eye on him, making you roll yours in fake annoyance.
“I wouldn’t mind him following me around.” Agreed Mia, as she gave you her usual hug as if she hadn’t seen you all but two days ago.
“These are my friends, Bella and Mia. And this is Rafe Cameron.” You did a quick introduction, the girls seemingly swooning as Rafe gave them an approving nod.
“Have you heard from them recently?” Asked Mia as the three of you made your way towards your first class of the day. In the meantime, Rafe allowed a smug smirk to play on his lips from the appreciation your friends showed, although he secretly wished the praise came from you.
“Not since last week. I tried to figure out if there is a pattern of when they show up, but nothing. Sometimes I’ll get two letters in a day, sometimes nothing for two weeks.” Your shoulders slumped in disappointment as you shook your head, frustrated that after months of torment, you still hadn’t figured out who your stalker was.
“It’s okay Y/N. Your dad’s whole team is working to find this person. And you have us. And well, I suppose Rafe might help too.” Bella bumped your shoulder with a grin on her face, making you chuckle from her reassurance.
The next weeks you fell into a routine with Rafe. While your stalker hasn’t been active, you would wake up, go to your classes and have him sit a couple of desks behind, eyeing you carefully. Then you would go home, have dinner - which no matter how many times you offered, he refused to have with you. You watched TV while he sat on the armchair to the side of you, looking at his phone instead of the screen that had your favourite films and series playing. You then went to bed when you had enough, only to hear him make some food for himself, until the light in the kitchen was turned off and the door to the spare room closed for the night.
Considering the two of you now lived under the same roof, you had not learnt much about Rafe. He kept to himself, only spoke when he was spoken to – and even then, only if he felt the need to justify anything with a verbal answer. He was grumpy and harsh and yet you were fascinated by him, wanting to learn more.
So, one morning when you woke up, you made it a mission to befriend him. A stimulating challenge is what you named it, because it had nothing to do with the fact that this awfully handsome man was by your side, each and every day. It was simply and only fascination.
You grinned at yourself in your mirror before you stepped out of your room, ready to accomplish the task you set for yourself.
“Good morning Mr Cameron.” You mused the moment you laid your eyes on him, in his more casual attire as he swapped his button down to a black t-shirt.
“Morning Miss Y/L/N.” He answered with brows raised and a flicked of confusion appearing around the creases of his eyes. So he is capable of showing emotion.
“I thought we could have a day out at the mall today? I don’t have classes and I could use a break.” You smiled innocently as you grabbed your keys and wallet, a glimmer of cheekiness playing on your face.
“Whatever you would like.” Rafe nodded, pocketing his phone and grabbing his car keys, gesturing towards the door. You happily followed, eagerly making you way down to his car and jumping into the passenger seat the second the car opens.
You could see Rafe giving you an odd look, mixed with confusion and a hint of amusement that disappeared just as quickly as it came.
“Do you like shopping?” You asked, your first attempt to break down the barriers in between the two of you as he backed out of your apartment.
“Not particularly.” He grumbled as he scrunched his nose at the thought.
“Hm. That’s a shame.” You snorted a giggle, imagining the well over six foot tall, pure muscle of a man navigating your favourite shops.
“When is your birthday?” You asked, the next question rolling off your tongue with ease. You could see Rafe glancing in your direction awkwardly before diverting his attention back to the road.
“Soon.” He said diplomatically, making you roll your eyes.
“Come on Mr Cameron. You probably already know mine alongside my blood type, how many moles I have on my body and the name of my childhood arch nemesis.” You joked, referring to the wad of papers he has been given about you. “The least you can do is tell me your birthday.” You almost itched your eyes when a hint of a smile played on his lips, before he answered your question, monotone and composed.
“November 8th.” He said simply, your eyes widening.
“Rafe, that’s next week!” You exclaimed in shock, his first name leaving your lips with such ease as if your only purpose was to repeat it over and over again. He shrugged in carelessness, while you planted the small piece of information away in your brain for a later date as you arrived at one of your favourite places to be.
“And what’s your favourite colour?” You carried on with the interrogation, earning another look in your direction from him.
“What is this?” He grumbled, not amused.
“Just trying to get to know you at least a little. Since we’re spending every day together.” You shrugged, a cheeky grin on your face.
“Well, don’t.” Rafe shut you down as you let out an exaggerated sigh of disappointment and crossed your arms, looking out the window. I’ll try again later - you thought.
A while later, you bit down on your lips to suppress a chuckle as you watched Rafe’s eyes darting between the number of clothing and shoe racks, his displeasure clear on his features. You were currently on the hunt for a few new dresses and shoes to match as you held up a few options to try on before making your way towards the dressing rooms. You had several different items of dresses that you liked the look of, but in true nature you wouldn’t be willing to decide until you saw how they hugged your curves.
“I will wait here.” Rafe stopped just outside the changing rooms, making your brows furrow.
“Actually Mr Cameron, I could use some help deciding.” You started, seeing the way his eyes widened ever so slightly at your proposition. “Please?” You added, bright, doe eyes on display, your best smile on your lips, hoping to sway him. When you heard a grunt that sounded very much like him giving up a fight, you grinned and squealed, almost skipped into a cubicle where you changed into your first option.
“What do we think?” You chirped as you leaped out of the dressing room and gave him a little twirl in your pink dress. He looked up from his phone and clenched his jaw before turning his attention back to the device.
“It looks fine.” He nodded, not sparing another look, but you didn’t miss the way his knuckles whitened from the force in which he held his phone in his grip.
“Wow, don’t shower me in compliments too much.” You joked, while walking back in and trying the rest of your options on. Each followed with a fine and a small look, while internally you wished you invited your girl friends who would actually be some use in helping you make a decision.
Trying your last dress on, a silk, black, slip on dress with a pair of silver heels, you stepped out, not expecting anything different. You were surprised to see his jaw slightly falling slack and eyes widening with his pupils dilating as he seethed in a small breath, before shutting his eyes and looking away. The reaction left you feeling hot all over as your cheeks heated and your throat felt dry, desperately licking your lips. His approval of you made you feel things that previously you could only imagine, the interaction making you want more from him, seeing how far you can push him.
“So, which one?” You croaked out, as you looked over at yourself in the large mirror.
“This one.” He nodded while you watched him look over at you up and down one more time, shifting in his seat and running his hands over his neck, the veins of his arms popping making your chest heave.
“Great.” You smiled in fake confidence, but the moment you closed the door behind you, you felt your knees buckling whilst you replayed his reaction to you, the idea of bringing an emotion out of him now feeling more of a challenge for you to not crumble under him.
Quickly, you changed back into your clothes and met Rafe outside who was now standing, and phone pocketed. You couldn’t help a small blush creeping on your cheeks as you looked at him, stepping in front of him to make your way to the register.
You visibly shifted as your cashier checked Rafe out, clearly flustered, although as you looked back you found his eyes on you as opposed to her, the proximity of him standing right behind you sending a small shiver down your spine. Kindly, you smiled at her watching as she stiffened under your gaze while calling your items through and accepting your payment. You reached for the bag she offered you, until a warm, large hand on your lower back stopped you in your tracks and you found Rafe reaching over you to take a hold of the bag.
“Thank you.” You breathed out as you looked at him and sent him a shy smile, earning nothing more than his signature nod as while he removed his hand and waited for you to leave the line and make your way out of the shop.
Your next destination was a bookstore, your most loved shop in the whole mall. It’s where you spent most of your time, the place filling a void that no purse or expensive brand could.
After sending a smile and a wave to the woman behind the counter, you started browsing through the books, picking out a few, looking over the covers while engrossed in the text at the back, holding onto a few whilst placing back others, making a mental note of those that caught your attention.
A period of time and picking out five new books later, you realized Rafe had wandered off, spotting his large, towering figure at the other end of the small shop, still in your sight as he was reading the first couple pages of a book himself. The image t of his crouched back, leaning over, lips slightly parted as his eyes fixated on the words in front of him enlightened a warmth in your chest, his soft look unusual and yet so fitting for him. You quietly walked towards him, not wanting to disturb him, your plan seemingly failing as he jumped a little after you stepped on a creaky floorboard.
“Found something you like?” Smiling, you diverted your attention to the cover, which from the front it looked like some sort of history book that you were unfamiliar with.
“It’s okay.” He hummed as he closed it and went to place it on the shelf, before you placed your hand on his, electricity running through the both of you as he stared at you in disbelief.
“Let me get it for you.” You grabbed onto the book, waiting for him to let go, but he just shook his head.
“Stop being stubborn. It’s a book. At least I can watch you do something other than stare at your phone all evening.” You grinned, as he scoffed at your accusation, finally allowing you to add his book to your pile.
“Like those mindless shows you watch are any better.” Grumbling, he reached towards you as he took the books out of your hand, now holding your shopping bags in one arm and those in the other, while you stared up at him in shock.
“My shows are very entertaining, thank you very much.” You bit back a smile, the interaction leaving you happy as he peeled back his layers slightly, feeling of accomplishment washing over you.
“Whatever you say. You ready to go?” He pointed his head towards the counter, and you nodded, following after him as you completed another purchase, excited to have been able to treat him just a little. Rafe, although would never admit it, felt beyond himself as his heartrate failed to settle, replaying the soft touch of your fingertips on his knuckles and your attentive eyes on him as he tried to convince himself that he was not gaining feelings. He was professional and you were kind, sweet and generous, but only a client regardless.
November 8th came around like lightspeed, and before you knew it, you found yourself waking up extra early as you paraded around your kitchen with several bowls and utensils scattered around the island, a large mess as you were working on Rafe’s birthday cake, while convincing yourself that you were just acting as a friendly neighbour to a man who was tasked to protect you.
You baked the batter last night, pretending to go to sleep in your room, only to re-emerge a couple of hours later once you were sure Rafe had laid his head down for the night. You were surprisingly good at remaining quiet during baking, resulting in you having a ready cake in the morning that just needed decorating.
You settled for a blue icing, with simple white swirls and patterns and a soft ‘Happy Birthday Rafe’ in the middle of the cake which you were very satisfied with once it was finished.
Shuffling rang through your apartment just as you finished, leaving you scrambling for a candle and a lighter as you planted the item in the icing, lighting it and holding it in your hands as you waited for him to appear out of his room.
He looked at you with wide eyes as a visible blush crept onto your face at his sleepy state while you noticed his top half was unclothed, only a pair of boxers covering him. His strong abs and wide legs left you breathless as you looked him over, finally settling on his shocked expression, slack jaw and slightly agape mouth. Not good, not good at all.
“What is this?” He asked, voice husky and full of morning rasp that made you swoon internally and bite down on your lips, wishing that the act could ground you and help you keep it together.
“Well, don’t make me sing for you Mr Cameron.” You joked, hoping your words could mask your flustered being. He took a step closer, carefully reading the words on the cake over and over again, until his eyes dropped to the mess behind you and finally landed on your smiley, excited expression as he swore his heart fluttered in admiration for the first time in his life.
“You baked me a cake?” He let out, confused and a little lost, his stoney appearance crumbling at your feet as his eyes sparkled, basking in your kindhearted gesture.
“Hmm, I tried my best. You know, it’s extremely hard to do anything for someone’s birthday when they are following you around constantly.” You rolled your eyes playfully, holding out the cake nearer to him.
“Make a wish and blow out the candle before the wax melts all over it, please.” A chuckle left his lips and you had to suck a breath in, the sound not something you were familiar with but god, if you didn’t wish you could hear it again. It felt like the pair of you had passed an unspoken milestone, him warming up to you enough to see him in a vulnerable state of momentary bliss.
He took another step closer until he looked down and blew out the candle, his eyes meeting yours as they were full of gratitude, making you wonder just how a man like Rafe Cameron spends his birthdays.
“Well, I’m sure you must have things planned for your birthday? Since I couldn’t get you anything else, I was planning on pinky promising you that I would not leave my apartment all day, so you could go out and have fun.” You smiled and shrugged, the offer seeming so mundane, but you hoped he could feel at least a little at ease at least on such a special day.
“That’s..” He started, brows furrowed, still in shock from the way a client of his made such an effort for him. “That’s very kind, but not necessary.” He settled on, diplomatically and not wanting to give anything away.
“I assure you Mr Cameron, it’s fine. You can track me on the cameras if you need to.” You chuckled, the soft smile that appeared on Rafe’s lips was a mixture of thankful and shy, but most of all sad and it made you feel like somehow your soul ached from the intensity of it all.
“You have plans today, don’t you?” The question left your lips more shocked than you would have liked as his face twisted into a second of pain before he gathered himself.
“No, I don’t. I’m working.” A shrug of his shoulders was his only answer, but the way they fell stiff proved his discomfort, making your heart clench.
“What about your family?” Your voice only above a whisper as you gazed at him in sadness and guilt eating you alive to have taken this day away from him without knowing.
“Y/N…” He started, your first name falling from his lips that left you open mouthed, the sound caressing you in warmth. “They’re not in the picture.” He breathed out and as much as you wanted to find out more, you knew now was not the time.
“Oh.” You sighed awkwardly, as your eyes darted around his face which you could no longer read. “Okay, well that just means you’re stuck with me today. What would you like to do?” You asked, excitement taking over you. Birthdays were something you always cherished, the feeling of celebrating someone making you feel joyous and filling you with a sense of pride.
“What would I like to do?” He repeated as if the words sounded alien to him, but you just nodded and hummed, waiting for his confirmation.
“I don’t know.” He laughed awkwardly as he scratched the back of his neck, the movement making his arm muscles jump and suddenly you felt hot and cold at the same time. The feelings you started harbouring for Rafe felt wrong but so right, making you dizzy and lost and yet yearning for more. Stop this – you cursed yourself internally.
“Okay, how about some coffee and cake to start the day while you have a think?” Placing the cake on the counter and showing a few dishes aside, you looked at him for confirmation, finding him gazing over at your figure, his stare burning a whole into you as he nodded and walked beside you, gathering the loose items and placing them in the sink over running water.
“Rafe, stop. It’s your birthday!” You protested, earning a side grin from him as he grabbed the sponge and got to work on the dishes ignoring your look of disapproval.
By the time he was done, two hot cups of coffee and two slices of cake were laid out on the breakfast bar, as Rafe walked into his room and pulled a shirt over him, much to your distaste.
It was suspected that Rafe Cameron didn’t grow up in an idyllic family and wasn’t surrounded by a bunch of loving people the way you have been. He never spoke about his family, you never heard him on the phone with anyone in particular and although he spent enough time staring at his screen, it seemed like he was either completing some sort of work or reading on it as opposed to texting.
The fact was however, that he didn’t know what he enjoyed doing on his birthday. He treated the day of celebration with awkwardness and an uncanny amount of hesitation, clearly unfamiliar with the fuss you made about him on his special day.
You encouraged him to think for himself, make decisions and lead the way and unbeknownst to you, the way you validated his emotions has been the greatest present Rafe has ever received in his life, full of gratitude towards you.
The day was spent with walks around parks, admiring the late autumn leaves and enjoying the fresh air, followed by bookstore hunts as you came to realise he used books as an escape the same way you did. Stops at coffee shops for hot chocolates and lattes while sitting in comfortable silence and people watching together.
It had filled you with a sense of relief, seeing Rafe so in his element with such peace and calm on his features and you would be lying if it didn’t make your heart skip a beat that you contributed to his visible contentment.
You were now stood next to him, a long dress hugging your body, his blazer draped over your shoulders on your way back from the restaurant you treated him to as part of his birthday celebration. He wanted to refuse, deflecting on how you had already done too much for him that day, but you took no notice of his words. The pair of you enjoyed a bottle of wine alongside fine pasta, giggling and warming up to each other, and you would be lying if you said you weren’t the happiest. Recalling the way his blue eyes danced in the candlelight, the way he asked questions about you and even told you stories about him, feeling like he was more than just someone that was being paid to spend time with you. It felt amazing.
The walk home was short, in hindsight a blessing as the air significantly cooled now that the autumn sun rays faded away. You were walking side-by-side, his hand occasionally bumping yours, sending a surge of electricity through your fingertips each time, yet you didn’t step further to avoid the contact.
“Tell me about your favourite birthday memory.” You blurted out, regretting your words instantly as his face twisted in pain and his eyes glazed over. “Sorry, that was stupid. You don’t have to.” You defended quickly with a flustered chuckle, cursing your mind.
“Probably the last birthday with my mum.” He nodded as your breath got stuck in your lungs, gazing at him in disbelief as he actually shared something so special and meaningful about himself to you. “She left us when I was 6. But she made sure to always make a huge deal out of my birthday.” He smiled at you, a sting of devastation playing behind his eyes as his words felt like they were twisting your heart, the squeeze in your chest causing physical pain.
“She was the last person to bake me a cake, before today.” He confirmed your suspicion as he sent you another meaningful stare before looking away and focusing his eyes on the steps he was taking.
“You deserve to have a huge deal made out of your birthday.” You whispered to him, the small smile that his lips curved into proving you that your words have found his ears as a slow hum left his lips, before the sound of cars and the click of your heals was the only thing that could be heard.
Your apartment building came into view, the knowing that tonight was ending filled you with a sense of dread. You knew tonight had been a big deal to the both of you, yet you were unsure what tomorrow would bring and it made you a little nauseous. You slowed down your steps, wanting to cherish the last few moments before you came to a complete halt just before you could get to the glass door that held too much uncertainty. Rafe picked up on the change in your demeanor, brows pulled into a line as he stopped beside you, a questioning look on his face.
“I know this may be overstepping, but I am grateful to have you in my life. And I know you said you don’t want to be my friend previously, but I hope you know that I am a friend to you if you ever need anything.” You admitted as his face softened, stepping closer to you until there was only a small distance between your bodies, his figure towering over you while his eyes never left yours.
“I don’t want to be your friend Y/N. I don’t want that word in your mind when you look at me.” He breathed, a finger under your chin as he tilted your face up towards him, his eyes full of conflicting emotion, want and need mixed with hesitation and sin. His eyes darted between your eyes and lips, the same way yours couldn’t find a place the settle on as he started closing in on you. You heard his erratic breathing mixing with yours, felt his heart beating against yours in the same rhythm, anticipation building with tension.
You felt his lip graze yours as you sucked in a surprised breath, and leaned in, his smooth skin against your begging to taste you as you felt his jaw clench and a shuddered breath left him, the air hitting you. Your head was spinning as your hand creeped up to his jaw, lips still not connected but he was so close and you needed him to be closer so badly.
“I..I can’t.” He mumbled, dropping his hands that were residing on your hips, the words he spoke vibrating on your lip as your eyes popped open, realizing that he will not kiss you. That you wanted him to kiss you and yet he won’t, your heart breaking for the first time.
“Right. Yeah.” You agreed, pulling away and looking up at him, his features tense, shoulders hard and strained and eyes dark and contained while yours were glossy, knowing you lost him before you even had him. Knowing that the man you had gotten to know after so much effort and time was yet again a stranger on his own accords.
The following morning acted as a confirmation of the evening’s almost events as you stared at him, ice blue orbs looking through you as if you were no longer the woman he held in his arms last night, the shadow of his lips grazing yours, replaying his words. You felt stupid for believing he wanted something, wanted you the way you yearned for him. And suddenly, the emotional distance you believed you had closed in on seemed to triple, him locking himself away so deep, you were sure you could never bring him back out.
And so, November was spent with you holding a hammer, breaking down his walls over and over again. Because you understood he was mislead his whole life. He was made to believe that people and happiness were temporary. Like he didn’t deserve permanent. But you were here, proving him wrong every step of the way until he gave up being the ice cold man, the shadow figure he taught himself to become.
He put up a fight, not trusting his instincts when it came to you. His head was scrambled with every look he gave you, every time you touched him reassuringly, every moment you shared with him was foreign. Yet you were there, showing him softness and kindness and he couldn’t help but give into you and accepting you, turning you into his lifeline, his breath of fresh air and allowing you into his heart once and for all as December approached.
Christmas came quickly and disappeared just as fast and before you knew it, the New Year was just round the corner.
The month of December was filled with hot chocolate, warm blankets, Christmas movies, fairy lights and soft innocent touches sprinkled with pining looks towards one another.
It felt like a turning point in your friendship with Rafe after the coldness in November his birthday followed. It was clear he would not break his professional promise to himself, but it was even more obvious that he felt as strongly towards you as you did for him. His place on the armchair switched to the seat beside you on the sofa, his knees grazing yours as you shared a fuzzy blanket most nights. Even after months of living together, he still hadn’t figured out the right amount of coffee to make in the mornings, always ending up with an extra cup’s worth, perfect for you to have, of course unintentionally. Lonely dinners turned to grocery shopping together, planning out your meals and taking turns behind the stove. Those mindless shows you used to watch alone were now something you followed together, on nights when you weren’t sharing about the new books you were reading beside one another. Falling asleep and waking up abruptly on the sofa together, feet dangled and your face on his chest, reveling in his scent to slipping away into your own bedrooms, hating the feel of the cold, empty beds. Catching glimpses of each other looking over lovingly, filled with admiration that made you both dizzy.
With your father being away and Rafe seemingly not having any family he would prefer to spend Christmas with – not that you didn’t encourage him to take a few days off – the two of you ended up cooking Christmas dinner together and shared a few thoughtful gifts, the holiday feeling special for the first time since you were a child. Because no matter how much it went unsaid, the two of you made each other feel loved and looked after, the way some higher power knew you equally needed it.
Your newfound domesticated routine only made your feelings grow for him, your heart aching each time his fingers grazed your arm or thigh, wanting nothing more than to touch him and have him give into you the way you knew he wanted to. While you were happy to have seen a softer side to him and got to know the person he was under the surface, you wished to learn all about who he was, completely and honestly.
But no matter how much you wished your circumstances were different, the fact was that he was your bodyguard, and you were only his client.
The thought sat in your belly bubbling while you hunched over a series of papers, trying your best to concentrate on the essays you needed to write, although the man sat across from you, engrossed in his book with a hot drink in his hand harboured most of your thoughts.
“Hey, so..” You began, drawing out your words until Rafe lifted his head, eyes meeting yours and no matter how many times he looked at you, you still felt your hands growing clammy under his sight.
“There’s this thing for New Years tomorrow night. I was hoping we could go?” Playing with your fingers, you bit down on your lips in anticipation of his words.
“Where?” He asked closing his book, attention now fully on you.
“It starts on campus, but I think we’ll end up going to a club or two after.” You shrugged in answer, slightly downplaying the scenario. In truth, you didn’t go out much. You enjoyed spending time at home and especially since your threatening messages, the number of times you went out and got drunk decreased exponentially. But you enjoyed celebrating important occasions, this being one of them.
“You can’t.” Rafe grumbled with brows drawn as he shook his head, his clear, cutthroat dismissal shocking you.
“But Rafe. It’s New Years! I’m sure even stalkers take the night off to celebrate it. I’m going.” You stated as a matter of fact, appalled at the suggestion he made. You watched as his nostrils flared and jaw tightened, his frustration showing clearly in his features. You were equally angry and not ready to back down as your body tensed and you pressed your lips into a tight, thin line.
“It’s a security hazard. Anyone could be there, it’s crowded and it’s not safe. So no, you’re not going.” Harsh words flew out his mouth as his hard gaze landed on you, arms crossed and flexed, as if to try and contain the unsettlement from bursting out of him.
“Well, you’re Mr Security. Figure it out!” You shouted, frustrated that the one thing you have been looking to attend was now tainted from his stubbornness. You looked away for a moment, hoping to gather yourself but his words drew you back into reality.
“I have just figured it out. Let me remind you of the arrangements Y/N. You are to follow my orders. I was hired to protect you, and put your best security interests first, not to be your best buddy taking you to parties and do whatever you feel like. That is not how this works.” His voice came out louder than he anticipated, words cutting through to you like shards of glass as tears threatened to spill from your lash line. You knew where he stood, but him saying it with such aggression hurt more than you could ever prepare yourself. His unwillingness to do something to make you happy, to try and compromise bothered you more than it should have, the realization of how much you wanted him to want to please you taking over you, suffocating your mind and body.
“Yes. You made that very clear Mr Cameron.” You nodded as your lips wobbled and a single tear fell on your cheek that you wiped away aggressively. Quickly, you gathered the loose bits of paper on your table and closed your laptop, not sparing a glance in Rafe’s direction while pocketing your phone as you took large strides towards your bedroom, that you slammed shut and locked, preventing him from entering.
“Y/N, please.” His voice sounded remorseful and full of regret, but your heart had already been shattered as you crawled under your duvet and buried your face in your pillow, allowing your tears to free flow in any which was they desired. You clenched at your chest as you heaved, feeling physical pain in your heart every moment you recalled his rough tone and jarring look, as if the last months you spent together were nothing special to him. You couldn’t stop thinking about all the small moments you shared, all the times you got so close to tasting his lips or feeling his heart under your palm, the mental images sending you into a frenzy as you laid there in your sorrows for hours.
You must have dozed off for a little while, your curtains remaining undrawn but the dark sky from the outside reminded you it was at least late afternoon.
A soft knock of knuckles against your door grasped your attention as you sucked a breath in, remaining quiet, not wanting him to know he had your full attention.
“Y/N, I made dinner, your favourite.” He breathed, voice unsure and careful, not wanting to say the wrong thing again as he was overthinking in his own mind, the last few hours driving him insane.
“I went out and got that chocolate cake you like too.” He continued and you felt your tummy rumble from the thought of food and your heart ache from the realization that he really did pay attention to you, but at the same time feeling sick from having to share a space with him.
“I just..” He sighed as he ran his hands through his hair and leaned his forehead against your door, cursing himself for messing up the one good thing he ever had. “I’m just really sorry. I wish I could take you.” He mumbled before pushing him away and leaving you in the darkness of your room, texting your friends to let them know that you will in fact be there tomorrow, ignoring the pang of guilt in your chest as you made your decision.
The following morning you woke up with puffy eyes and a rumbling stomach, glancing at your phone to see it was already past 11. You groaned as you forced yourself out of bed, creeping towards your door to see if you could hear any movement that would signal Rafe’s whereabouts, only being met with silence.
You slowly opened your door, as you peaked your head though and looked around, unable to see the broad shoulders that you became so accustomed to. A sigh fell from your lips as you walked towards the kitchen settling on some juice and a sandwich which you started putting together, when you heard someone croaking their throat behind you.
“Can we talk about it?” Rafe breathed out as you turned your face, finding him on the sofa, in the spot you normally occupied as he lowered his phone. His eyes were plagued by dark circles, the idea that he hadn’t slept because of your falling out comforting you while making you feel awful, knowing you have planned on crossing him later out of spite.
“I don’t want to talk to you.” You shook your head, turning your attention back to your meal, which you brought back into your bedroom with you without as much as a further word, missing the way he dropped his head in his hands, allowing his guilt to consume him completely.
Your overnight bag was packed full of the black silk dress you bought a few months ago, the matching shoes, a purse and a few makeup items as you sat on your bed, waiting for the moment when the shower turned on, signaling the all clear for you to sneak out. Luckily, Mia only lived a couple blocks away, ready for your call to leave her house to pick you up without raising any suspicion. Having lived with Rafe, you were aware of his routine, counting on the fact that he would be in the shower soon and to your luck, the water turned on just as you expected it to.
You carried out your dirty dishes with you and placed them on the counter, signaling to him that you have been out, hoping this would deter any suspicions he might gain. You were counting on the fact that you hadn’t discussed anything that he would leave you alone for the night as you could sneak back in during the early hours of the morning, without him finding out. The plan was a little shaky, but you didn’t care enough to find a solid solution, as you stepped out the front door and pulled it in with the quietest of clicks, while praising yourself.
After a quick message and walking a few doors down, your friend Mia picked you up as the two of you giggled in excitement of what the evening has in store for you.
The night was in full swing as you found yourself in a club, surrounded by people from your college and other universities, all having fun and excited to welcome in the New Year. You were a few drinks deep, dancing and swaying your body with your friends, slurping on the alcohol, enjoying the buzz it gave you. You felt on top of the world, not having done anything this fun in months and for the first time in forever, you felt as though you were free from all troubles. No stalker, no bodyguard in your tracks, no failed relationship and no broken heart. Just you, your girls and the boozy drinks.
It was nearing midnight, your excitement shooting through the roof as you watched the clock, showing you there was only three more minutes to wait. The ceiling was covered in balloons and confetti, waiting to be released on all those surrounding the dance floor the moment the countdown was up.
“I’m going to get us some shots for when the time is up!” Shouted Bella, as you and Mia nodded and waved her off, continuing to dance. That was until a shoulder bumped into you hard, swinging your bag off your shoulder and sending you stumbling, almost falling over.
“Hey!” You shouted in annoyance as you turned around, finding a man vaguely familiar to you looking shocked and almost scared.
You were ready to defend yourself, until your eyes fell on a brown envelope that he was holding in his hand, reaching towards your bag.
“Shit.” He breathed, taking a couple of steps back as the realization sunk in that you were now face to face with the man who had been sending you creepy, explicit and threatening messages to you, as well as images of yourself for the past months, keeping you inside in fear on numerous nights.
“Who are you?” You shouted, voice trembling as you created more distance between the two of you, subconsciously looking around for Rafe who was of course, not around.
“I love you Y/N! I know you don’t know me yet, but I could treat you so good. Please give me a chance.” He begged, eyes wide and hands clasped as he sunk to his knees in front of you, grabbing onto your leg, making you scream as you tried to get out of his grasp, panic setting in.
“Omg, Y/N, that’s…” Your friend started as she immediately pulled her phone out, taking a picture of the man in case he was to vanish before she dialed the police and held your hand, pulling you more into her, ready to find a security guard.
“Don’t leave!” Shouted the man as he was back on his feet, reaching for you, making you more scared and unable to breathe. You were in histerics, tears falling from your eyes uncontrollably, waiting for his burning touch to reach you, until you looked to find him being tackled onto the ground.
“Don’t you dare touch her.” You heard Rafe’s voice, a sense of relief washing over you, although your hands were still shaking and you pulled yourself closer to your friend. You watched as Rafe pummeled the guy, his nose bloody as he stood no chance against your bodyguard. A few people have turned around, pointing at the scene unfolding, giving the two of them more space as some of them cheered and clapped, while others stood and watched in shock.
“3..2..1! Happy New Year!” You heard around you, as alarms started going off, the crowd shouting in happiness as all the balloons and confetti started falling from the sky, while you stood there, mascara stained cheeks, chest heaving, ears filled with a high pitch ring, the whole world seeming to play in slow motion.
“Get her outside.” Rafe shouted at Mia and the now arriving Bella who watched in confusion and shock, while Mia grabbed the two of you and dragged you outside, not wanting to go against Rafe’s instructions.
“Y/N, talk to me please.” Your friend was pleading, but you just stood there frozen, staring into space, unable to form the words as you watched police cars pulling up and a number of men raiding the club. Moments later the guy was in handcuffs as he was carried out and pushed into a van, all the while shouting pleas at you to love him back.
Rafe emerged from the club which had too many bystanders pointing at the cars, while others too drunk to understand what’s going on continued dancing. His shirt was crumbled and his chest visibly raised and sunk much faster than you had ever seen it.
“You okay? Did he touch you?” He hurried over while he examined you, looking for any signs of injury. As he reached you, he desperately held onto you, your face between his palms, making you relax into him and shutting your eyes momentarily.
“I’m okay.” You whispered as you looked at him, another tear falling down your cheek, which he wiped away with his thumb. He looked furious, teeth clenched, veins popping in his neck but terrified at the same time, and the fact that it was from the idea of you hurt made your heart tug in your chest.
“We’re going home. Come on.” He pulled you into his side, and after a quick chat with your friends that you blocked out, he walked towards his car where he opened the door for you, waiting patiently until you were in your seat.
The drive was filled with heavy breaths from both of you and the occasional sniffle from you, laced with an unspoken tension lingering in the air.
“I mean jesus Y/N, what did you think?” Rafe broke the silence as he turned to you momentarily, eyes wide and lips pressed together, quickly returning his gaze to the road as if looking at you too long might make him lose his mind.
“How did you know I was gone?” You whispered, turning your face to Rafe while ignoring his remark, feeling too overwhelmed to argue with him.
“I wanted to give you space Y/N. But I started getting suspicious after not hearing anything from you for hours. I have a spare key to your room.” He admitted, as you nodded, no further explanation needed.
“I’m sorry.” You whispered, the words cutting something in him as he bit the inside of his cheek, his jaw clenching, but not saying anything further, the remainder of the drive fueled by silence.
It wasn’t long until you were in front of your apartment, Rafe unlocking it and flicking the light switch on, opening the door and waiting for you to walk in. The sight of colourful balloons and confetti painting the floor, two closed boxes of pizza on the side, a large projected clock that was now showing 12:52 and sparkly decoration hung up all over the living room greeted you, filling your eyes with unshed tears and your chest with an unimaginable amount of guilt, seeing the lengths he went to so you could still have a good time, while you lied to him.
“I didn’t want you to miss out. I’m not a complete monster.” Rafe stepped in behind you, closing the door and sending you a sad smile, a choked sob erupting from your throat as you buried your face in your hands, allowing your tears to freefall with such intensity it startled you both.
“Hey…” Rafe cooed, the sound of his calming voice triggering you further as he placed your bag on the sofa as walked to you, hooking an arm around your shoulders and pulling you into his chest. You let your arms fall around his neck, as he placed one hand in your hair, slowly caressing you while the other stayed on your waist, his thumb drawing patterns into your skin.
“I was so scared Rafe. And I’m so sorry for sneaking out and going against your word. It was stupid and I’m just sorry.” You sobbed and you felt him shake his head at your words as he planted a kiss into your hair, the feeling of his lips heavenly.
“Shh. It’s okay. I’m sorry too. I should have let you go and came with you.” He apologized as he lifted you up suddenly, walking to the sofa where he sat down and pulled you into his lap, his hands never leaving your body.
“You’re okay. Nothing bad can happen to you now. He’s gone, alright?” He mumbled as you nodded, feeling him reach for something until your blanket was pulled over the both of you. You clung to him for dear life while straddling him, your face buried in the crook of his neck, and you had no plans on moving.
“Deep breaths baby, yeah? Breathe for me.” He soothed, playing with a strand of your hair as he deepened his own breaths, hoping you would start copying it and so you followed his lead.
“Good job sweetheart. Now close your eyes for me. I’m not going anywhere, okay?” He continued and you nodded, scooting as close to him as you could until you were fully comfortable, allowing your eyes to flutter shut and before you knew it, you were asleep in Rafe Cameron’s arms, who couldn’t ignore the way his heart threatened to beat out of his chest with every second your body was flush against his. He needed to convince himself that you were there, safely in his arms and selfishly, he held onto you for a long while after you had dozed off, unable to let you go just yet. The scent of your shampoo filling him with sweet comfort and the soft breaths leaving your mouth reminded him that there was still good in the world, good that he so desperately wanted to deserve and make his own.
The morning light stirred you awake, the events of last night slowly hitting you as you found yourself in your bed, confused as to how you got here. You recalled the club, the shouting, Rafe’s protective arms around you and the way your eyes fell heavy while in his grip. He must have carried you to your room.
Climbing out of bed, you heard his voice talking, realizing as you opened the door that he was on the phone. He was wearing his usual attire, button-down shirt and trousers, one which you haven’t seen him in in a while as he got more comfortable in your presence, so did his uniform.
“I got to go now.” He spoke, eyes landing on you as he ended the phone call while you looked him over confused.
“Good morning. How are you feeling?” He asked attentively, his words tugging at your heart strings.
“Better, thank you. Who was that?” You asked, feeling slightly out of your comfort zone.
“That was my agent. He confirmed your stalker was Dean Willis, he went to your class in college. He was arrested and is looking at a long few years in jail with your father’s influence and generous donation. You don’t need to worry about seeing him again.” He explained and a relieved sigh fell from your lips as realization to his familiarity settled in you, feeling stupid for all the signs you must have missed. In the meantime, you knew the influence your father tended to have and although it seemed unethical, you couldn’t be more grateful for his position in this current time.
“Thank you, Rafe. For last night. I really messed up and I don’t know what I would’ve done if you weren’t there.” Your lips trembled as you ran your hand through your hair, a soft smile on his lips as he nodded at your apology.
“I’m just glad you’re safe.” He spoke as he took a step towards you, uncovering the suitcase and large bag that was covered by his frame until this moment, confusion spreading through your features.
“Rafe, what’s going on?” You pointed to his belongings, frightened as his expression read a flicker of hurt and disappointment.
“My assignment was completed Y/N. The guy is no longer a threat to you and so my contract is expired. I’m being asked to leave.” He stepped in front of you, a soft palm placed against your cheek as his thumb brushed the smooth skin.
“Wait, so that’s it? You’re leaving me? You said you wouldn’t.” You whispered, voice painful and strained, the idea of not having him in your life sending a rush of grief through you.
“I have to.” He nodded, voice equally quiet and reserved as he swallowed hard and shook his head in disappointment.
“Are you going to take another client on?” You asked with a frown, jealousy boiling in your blood at the idea of someone getting him instead of you, because truly no one was deserving enough to have him in their lives.
“I’ll be taking a little career break.” Softly, he tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear before giving you a sad smile followed by the purse of his lips and stepping away from you, the distance feeling cold and unnerving.
“Right. I guess you do deserve it.” You chuckled awkwardly, adoring the way his lips turned upwards from your words but nevertheless, your shoulders slumped and you had to look away for a moment as your sadness clearly painted your features.
“Rafe, I think I’ll miss you.” You admitted, tears clouding your vision slightly, already feeling more empty than ever and he hasn’t even stepped out of your apartment yet.
“I think I will miss you too Y/N. It was a pleasure to serve you.” He smiled as he tried to hide his obvious scowl while he turned around and grabbed his suitcase, pulling the keys to your apartment out of his pocket and placing it on the coffee table. He gave you one last glance before opening the door and stepping out of it, closing it right behind him, leaving you in the empty, cool flat. You stood there, waiting for your heart to stop aching, as a series of tears fell from your eyes, realizing that as much as you tried to get away from him when you first met him, a life without Rafe Cameron may just be a sad and lonely one.
Heartbreak was a funny emotion, especially when you were aching for someone who was never truly yours. You feel it all, the hurt, the longing, the need for their presence laced with anger and disappointment and yet you want nothing more than to turn back time and do it all again.
The next weeks you spent wallowing in your sadness, focusing on school work and inviting your friends as many nights as you could just to escape the lonely, dark pit that was your mind. So when your friends encouraged – forced – you to accompany them clubbing, you tried to convince yourself that it would help you forget about Rafe for one night, which was better than staying in for another, constantly thinking about where he may be and why he never contacted you since he left you.
You knew he had feelings for you, that much was clear. You also knew that he didn’t date his clients, hell he barely dated from what he told you. But you were no longer his client and had not been tied down by contracts and legislation. Still, he was nowhere to be seen, making you feel like a temporary part of his life and it ached.
Your first night out without Rafe lurking in the background has filled you with anxiety and anticipation, the bad kind. You felt on edge, as if someone was watching you from the shadows, waiting for any opportunity to harm you. Of course, your stalker has been arrested and life returned to its uneventful theme, but you couldn’t shake the thumping behind your ear that had been riddling you ever since leaving your apartment.
You were dancing with Mia and Bella, the girls having the best time as they twirled each other and you, with drinks in their hands. You were still only on your second, slowly sipping on it, waiting for the haze of the alcohol to calm your nerves, but it never came.
While trying your best to keep it together on the dance floor, you caught the eye of a guy, looking to be your age across the room as he looked over at your dancing form. The attention would normally make you feel desired but tonight the only man you wanted was one who was no longer in your life.
The thumping in your chest grew more as your hands became clammy and started shaking, the feeling foreign and making you slightly worry at the way your body was reacting to nothing in particular.
“I’m going to get some air.” You leaned in to your friends as you shouted, the words coming out uncertain which they seemed to pick up on too.
“You want us to go with you?” Mia answered as she stopped her movements, her eyes looking over at your visibly pale and shaken features.
“No, you guys stay. I will only be a moment.” You sent them a reassuring smile, as you started pushing your way through the large number of dancing bodies, feeling trapped and needing for escape more each second passed.
Pushing the club door open, you took a large breath in, the chilly winter air nipping at your skin with harshness, zapping at you with such intensity you felt it on your bones. But even the cool air could not stop your broken heart from racing as you squeezed your eyes shut and tried to focus on levelling your breath.
“Hi gorgeous.” Spoke a voice behind you, as a set of hands creeped their way around your waist intrusively, the voice in your throat getting caught as you froze on the spot.
“I saw you looking at me across the room. You’re the prettiest girl in this bar.” The man leaned closer and whispered in your ear while squeezing on your skin and as if someone flipped a switch, you started shaking, a sense of fight taking over you.
“Don’t touch me!” You shouted while you frantically tried to get the stranger’s hands off you, tears streaming down your face as you threw yourself all around in order to get out of his grasp and create distance between him and safety.
“Jesus. You’re crazy.” Mumbled the guy while holding his hands up in defence and walking away, but the damage has long been done.
You crouched down behind the wall, bawling as your entire being shook from fear, feeling like you were unable to breath as if someone threw you in the deepest trench of the ocean. You ran your hands through your hair, tugging on the strands, seeking comfort and calm which never came.
“Y/N? Sweetie, what’s wrong? Are you hurt?” Blurry figures stood in front of you and you couldn’t help but shake your head at the question, words not forming.
“Y/N, I need you to tell us what’s wrong.” Your friend, Mia crouched down beside you and laid a hand on your knee, which made you flinch so hard she removed her palm in an instant.
“Call Rafe.” You mumbled incoherently; your sentence followed by a slow, agonizing silence.
“What was that? Tell us again babe?” Mia followed, her voice slow and appearing to be composed, but you knew she must be freaking out over your frightened figure.
“Call Rafe. Please. I need him.” You begged, the request taking all your energy. You stayed sat there, slow tears falling from your eyes as you didn’t appear to get any better.
“She wants us to call Rafe.” Sounded a confused tone followed by a dial tone and a few broken sentences, until you leaned your head on your knee, trembling and shivering just hoping the ache and hurt would end soon.
“What happened?” You heard a familiar voice, low but apprehensive.
“We don’t know. She came outside needing air alone, but we didn’t want to leave her by herself,f so we followed and found her like this.” Explained your friend and you heard a hum until a shuffle of shoes sounded close to you.
“Y/N, baby? I’m here. I need you to look at me.” Rafe asked as he laid something around your shoulders that smelled like him, the scent of him engulfing you and immediately soothing your senses slightly, although you stayed still. That was until a couple of fingers started grazing your forehead and temple, soft and delicate as if a harder push would break you apart.
“Sweetheart, you’re scaring me.” He sounded strained, the way you looked so broken and frightened breaking his heart all over again. All he wanted was to scoop you up and take you away in his arms where he could keep you safe from all harm.
“He.. He touched me.” You choked out, voice sounding like someone else’s, but he didn’t miss your sentence as his eyes darkened and jaw clenched, the worst images plaguing his mind and fuelling his blood.
“Who touched you? Did someone hurt you?” His voice grew serious, filled with anger as he was ready to end whoever dared to lay a finger on his most important girl.
“This guy. He put his arm around me, but I didn’t like it. It wasn’t you.” You lifted your head up finally, your mascara strained, blood shot eyes meeting his furious and worried ones as he seemed to soften under your gaze. His hands moved to your cheek, holding you gently in need of grounding and knowing that you are here, in one peace, safe.
“He didn’t hurt me, I promise. It’s just all too much.” You cried as you watched him fall apart under your sad eyes, making your heart beat that little faster.
“Let’s get you home, okay? I’m here. I’ve got you.” He whispered, while noticing your gaze falling onto his lips, the gesture leaving his throat dry and breath uneven. You nodded, feeling him lean a hand under your back and another under your legs as he lifted you up, holding you close to his chest. You laid your head in the crook of his neck as your eyes closed, exhaustion taking over your being, the feeling of being near him bringing you back to your mind.
“Do you two need a lift home?” He asked, question directed to your friends who were still looking at the pair of you confused making a mental note to ask questions when you were in the right headspace once again.
“No, it’s fine. We have an uber on the way. Just take care of her, okay?” You heard as you felt Rafe nodding before he started walking to what you could assume was his car.
“You’re doing so good love. We’ll be home soon, yeah?” A soft kiss was planted to you head allowing a satisfied sigh to leave your lips as you forced a nod from your head in answer to his words. A moment later you were laid on the passenger seat of his car, him buckling the seatbelt over you and before you knew it, he was driving with a hand spread over your thigh as he traced soft patterns on your skin and your eyes began to grow heavier by the second.
The car journey seemed only monetary while you dozed off, as you found yourself in Rafe’s arm again as he fumbled with his pocket, pulling his keys out that still seemed to have a cut of your apartment on it. Once the door was open, the kicked it in with his foot and made his way towards your bedroom, laying you on the soft material of your duvet and cushions, as you started to become aware of your surroundings.
“Here she is.” He mumbled, looking over at you with a small smile and adoring twinkle in his eyes, leaving you to blush under his gaze even in your flustered state.
“Do you want me to stay over tonight, or leave you alone?” He twirled a strand of hair out of your face, while leaving him thumb on the side of your face. His warm hands a sweet contrast to the freezing cold of the outside.
“Stay, please?” You asked shyly, as you watched him nod and stand up off your bed.
“Let me know if you need anything, okay?” Rafe gazed over at you as he walked towards the bedroom door and put a hand on the doorhandle.
“Oh.” You breathed out, brows furrowed in disappointment, the sound of confusion stopping Rafe in his tracks as he turned around and waited for an explanation in silence.
“I just thought…you..” You began, words not forming the sentence you would hope for.
“Could you stay here tonight? Please?” The sound of your voice, so weak and needy filled his brain and how could he say no to you with those doe eyes and innocent sparkle you carried as he dropped his head and unbuttoned his jeans, smirking at the way your eyes started darting around your room.
He crawled in next to you, the feeling of uncertainty washing over you as you weren’t sure how to play this situation out. You settled on turning to face him, while his eyes stayed glued to the ceiling.
“I’m sorry.” You started, still trying to find your voice.
“For what, angel?” He turned his head towards you, as he shuffled closer, the proximity warming you with the want to be nearer to him, and touch his skin, feel him all over you.
“For calling you. I know we haven’t spoke since you left and you clearly didn’t want to and…” You spiralled, until you were caught off by his words.
“I’m glad you called.” He shook his head as his hand returned to his favourite place, on your face, grazing and studying your features, never wanting to forget a single freckle.
“Thank you for getting me.” You breathed out, voice no longer above a whisper as you looked over at his beautiful, heaven sent features, doing your best to get closer to him until his chest was touching yours, the sudden feeling making you gasp slightly and filling your veins with a heat so intense you thought you might burn alive.
“I will always come to get you. I will never let anything happen to you. I promise.” He whispered with meaning, while kissing your forehead, the feeling of his lips on your skin taking over your being. You looked up to see him staring at you, eyes filled with something you couldn’t quite make out, the intensity swirling behind his orbs making you feel like a mess, your brain foggy and creating a mind of its’ own.
“Because you care about past client satisfaction?” You breathed out, unable to shift your eyes from his lips which you saw curl into an amused smile, the creases making your heart thump against your chest.
“Because I’m in love with you.” Rafe confirmed, not leaving any room to overthink as he pressed his lips to yours, in the most head spinning, toe curling kiss you have ever experienced. As he pulled you closer to him, you melted against his body as a satisfied moan erupted from your throat until he broke away from you.
“I’m sorry I hadn’t come back for you after everything. I haven’t felt this way about anyone and it truly scared me. But I promise you, I will make it up to you and I’m not going anywhere.” He explained, his words washing you in love and adoration and you truly felt on top of the world.
“I love you too Rafe.” You agreed happily, for the first time feeling at ease as you connected your lips once again and you were sure you would never be able to stop kissing the man you fell for so unapologetically, over and over again until there was no turning back. Life felt complete again as you curled into his arms, feeling safe and you knew it was exactly where you were supposed to be in this moment, in every moment.
Thank you for reading. As a side note, although my request are closed, I am accepting blurb requests based on this AU, if you have any ideas/anything you would like me elaborating more on (e.g their Christmas or Rafe's birthday dinner). Love you all💗
Adding my taglist and those who I know have been waiting for this: @mvybanks @jjasen @fulla02reads @leclerc16s @maybankslover @kravitzwhore @delicaties @kikixdee @dreamingwithrafe @starkeylover @mrsmaybank13 @merc12-us @notslay-norcleor @m-indkiller @princessbl0ss0m @vivian-555 @k-n-e @dreaming-of-the-reality @inky-sun @camelliaflow3r @ifilwtmfc @illmindedyetfamiliar @bookishnerd1132 @lucky7rosie @abbybarnesstuff @fallingwallsh @bjrmaybank @bibliophilewednesday @pank0w @augustlikesdeath @jessmaybank @emmalandry @ashamedtobewhitemanswhore27 @maybanksbabe @madelynie @forevermoreharrington @runningfrom2am @softcoremaybank @h34rtsformilli @rafecameronzwhore @lovelydoveval @lail1010 @stvrligghtt @minispice-1 @ironmaiden1313 @bloody-mf-bsc @madelynie @allsmilesreally7
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carlyraejepsans · 7 months
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an overwhelming majority of the really edgy aus that base themselves on the idea of sans "snapping" seem to work under the impression that there's a proportional relationship between sans' sanity and how many people are killed, so to make things easier, they just go ham with idk 10000 genocide runs and take it for granted that he'd go insane.
when actually, this thing is a bell curve. you kill few enough people? he can continue living his life like he doesn't care about it. you kill everyone? he's finally moved to act and do the right thing to prevent the timeline from ending. I'm tellin ya, it's in the MIDDLE that the fun happens. king mettaton ending, empress undyne ending... when you kill both toriel and papyrus but let the world live on a little more broken without them? now that's where he gets nasty.
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pjs-everyday · 6 months
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“One more chapter.”
11. Royal AU // Twiyor Month @twiyorbase
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ozzgin · 16 days
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Hello!
🌟 here again! I'm here with another request for our lovely bodyguard yandere.
Have you ever seen videos of fans jumping up onto stages with kpop idols? Then get carried away by security behind stage?
I'd love to see how our lovely violent baby girl would react to not being able to react with immediate violence as a reaction given all the eyes and cameras on him. Would he be stone faced just carrying the stage crasher by the collar like a cat? Or would he be dragging him by the legs into hell?
The reactions of fans to the bodyguard would be interesting too, I could see Reader being jealous over people thirsting over bodyguard on Twitter or something lol. Or bodyguard confused on why people would say stuff like "he could snap my back like a twig and I'd say thank you" about him.
Hope you are taking care, and I have my fingers crossed to hear from you eventually
Sincerely
-🌟
Long overdue and I'm terribly sorry about that! I had the ideas for a while now, but I could never find the proper words to assemble everything. ;-;
Yandere! Bodyguard x Idol! Reader (III)
Your bodyguard has gained sudden Internet fame after dealing with a crazed fan on stage. Naturally, he couldn't care less about anyone else, but that doesn't stop you from trying to make him jealous in return. Someone will have to be the sacrificial lamb to his murderous possessiveness.
Content: female reader, obsessive behavior, violence, death, reader and yandere are both psycho
[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3]
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The screen of your phone lights up again and you only need a quick glance to know what it is. Another post about last night’s event. About your bodyguard. You sink your nails into the leather chair and look ahead towards the mirror, exchanging a smile with the hairstylist.
“Oh, it looks lovely! You always do such a great job.” You compliment the woman as you tilt your head both ways, admiring the gentle curls. Now get the fuck out already.
“I’m so glad! Is there anything else you’d like me to-”
“No, that’s all. You can go”, you respond curtly.
The stylist collects her products and waves at you, exiting the room. The phone vibrates once more with a new notification, and you promptly throw it against the door. It scatters in large chunks of scrap across the plush carpet.
The whole ordeal happened within seconds. You were performing the final song of the evening when a fan hurled himself over the security barrier and onto the stage. The people standing at the very front began screaming and some took their phones out, scrambling for a good angle to record everything.
“Please, (Y/N), I’m your biggest fan!” the man pleaded, approaching you with shaking hands.
You froze in place, observing his actions with the same indifference of watching a TV ad that goes on for too long. Before the stranger could even reach your proximity, your bodyguard effortlessly and speedily threw him over the shoulder, giving you a reassuring nod and retreating backstage. He had that smile on his face that signaled he was pissed, and your mouth hung open in realization: You wouldn’t be able to witness the massacre.
You knew that expression all too well. That man would never see the light of day again, and under normal circumstances you would be right behind your bodyguard, cheering him on and suggesting ways to further torment of whoever dared to get too close to you.
And yet, your little ritual had been interrupted. You stood there on the stage, baffled, as the other idols gathered around you with worried looks. You poor thing. That must’ve been terrifying. The audience was shouting words of support, encouraging you to continue as if nothing happened. With pursed lips, you tightened your grip around the microphone and reassured everyone of your well-being. The show had to go on, regardless of your bloodlust.
This morning, you woke up to hundreds of posts online about the incident. Or rather, the way your bodyguard dealt with it. You scrolled through photos, videos, and confessions regarding the mysterious stranger who protected you from harm.
“I need a man like that in my life!”, “I know, right? So cool!”, “Imagine how easily he’d pick you up”, “The broad shoulders! I’m in love <3”
You don’t even have time to be properly upset about it. Your schedule for the day is packed with interviews and photoshoots. You glance in the mirror one final time and exit the room. The bodyguard has been waiting for you, resting against the wall with crossed arms.
“I need a new phone”, you tell him in a casual tone.
“What happened to the previous one?” He inquires, somewhat confused by your sudden request.
“Just do it!” You snap at the large man, rushing past him without providing any window for a reaction.
Ideally, you would very much like to tell him that the sudden influx of attention irritates you beyond comprehension. Then he’d reassure you that his indifference towards everyone else has not changed whatsoever, and thus your worries are entirely unfounded; but, if you need an outlet to release all that stress, he can easily find an empty changing room and service you like he always does.
Unfortunately, there is no time for that.
The bodyguard follows your movements with raised eyebrows, perplexed. What could’ve gotten you into such a sour mood? Has someone caused you to be upset? Are you still pouting after the missed playtime? He ponders the possibilities as he searches for an assistant.
The employee is visibly startled upon hearing his deep voice calling her. She turns obediently and nods, flashing her best customer-facing smile.
“Can you get (Y/N) a new phone?” he asks plainly.
“Huh? Sure…Did she specify any preferences? What was her previous model?”
He stares in confusion.
“…Can’t you guess?” she insists.
“I’m not good with these things.” The bodyguard rummages through his pocket and pulls out an old, cracked device to prove his point. “I don’t use phones much.”
Why would he? The only time he needs a phone is when he’s apart from you, which hasn’t happened since the Christmas incident. He previously considered a more modern option, so he could stalk your social media and make sure you don’t have any perverts sliding into your messages. That proved to be unnecessary, as you frequently leave your phone unattended or involve him in the process: most of your photos posted online nowadays are actually curated by his truly.
“Oh, so you don’t know about the recent craze?” The woman chuckles and takes out her own phone, speedily tapping on the screen before presenting it to the man. “See? You’re trending!”
He scans the multitude of messages. Ah, so that’s what it was. His lips curl into a grin. To think he’d witness his spoiled idol struggle with jealousy.
“That will be it for today!” the photographer announces, gesturing with his hands and guiding his helpers with the expensive equipment.
This was it, the last photoshoot. You unscrew the cap from your water bottle and take a healthy sip from it, wiping the sweat off your forehead with your other hand. The only good part about the continuous work was that you couldn’t check more of those annoying posts drooling over your bodyguard. Remembering it is enough to increase your heartbeat. The male model you were paired with for this campaign walks in your direction.
“Say, do you have anything planned after this?” He questions smugly. “You could come back to my place.”
What a ridiculous idea, you think with a grimace. Does this asshat think he’s worthy of your company? After a second of contemplation, you’re flooded with the same disappointment you felt back on the stage, watching your fan being carried away like a mere piece of cardboard over the much larger frame of your bodyguard. You might just consider the stupid offer. Why not? It’s not fair to be the only one plagued by jealousy.
“Sure. I know a better place, though.”
Your eyes narrow in a bright smile and you lead the young man towards your backstage room. As you pass by your bodyguard, you remember to mention in a low voice: “Make sure no one disturbs us.” He doesn’t answer, merely gazes at you with an empty expression.
“Man, that guy is scary as hell”, the model remarks as he throws himself in your vanity seat. “Are you not afraid to be alone with him?”
“Not really, no”, you respond idly. “You, on the other hand…”
“Excuse me?”
Now then. To set the scene, you gingerly climb into the man’s lap and adjust your arms around his neck. What a frail little human in comparison to your bodyguard. You blush in anticipation and begin counting in your head.
“H-hey, what did you mean-”
The young man is interrupted by someone’s abrupt intrusion. Your bodyguard throws you a quick glance before turning to close the door behind him. Alright, he can’t be too excited. He must pretend he’s furious, baffled, out for the hunt. You went all the way out for him. He even checked his watch to make sure you had enough time. He can’t let his enthusiasm betray him.
You jump out of the model’s hold with a gasp.
“It’s not what you think~!” you exclaim with feigned surprise. “He started flirting with me and I…” Your words trail off and you rub your arm nervously.
The bodyguard approaches the other man with monotonous movements and grabs him by the collar.
“Wait, you can’t possibly…he’s a well-known model!”, you protest with a fake cry.
Sweet little darling. Worry not, he won’t disappoint you. He’ll put on the best show for your sake. Anything to soothe your innocent heart.
“Could be the President himself”, your bodyguard confesses with a dash of theatrics, “and I’d still break his fucking neck for touching you.” He pulls out his pocketknife and looks at you. “I’ll deal with you in a moment, Miss.”
Your knees weaken and you have to rest against the vanity table. Among the screams and pleads for mercy coming from the poor butchered model, you can only focus on one thing: the violent fucking you’re about to receive.
Your bodyguard truly knows you best.
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wh0re-behavi0r · 1 year
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WIP Wednesday
Me and @eddiediazisascorpio have started another fic!! Here's our bodyguard au partially inspired by the show The Bodyguard but also it's just another bodyguard fic
Diaz smiles wryly. “You’re going to that appointment, Mr.Buckley.”
“And if I don’t? What are you going to do about it?” Diaz can read him, he can tell that even two more people in here constantly would scare him and drain his energy. The only reason he can deal with all of the security is because most of them don’t interact with him. He doesn’t dare think about why.
"You know, maybe I should’ve hired you as my dom, so then you can really put me in my place the way you want to," Buck smiles and bats his eyes, hoping the flirting will get him to back off. He made that joke earlier, and Buck has always been one to push the envelope.
For the first time since they’ve met, Diaz sort of laughs. It’s a nice sound. “I think that me getting you to go to that appointment is good enough for now... "
Tagging @eddiecore118 @eddiediazisascorpio @eddiediass @ttimbradford @gayhoediaz @monsterrae1 @swiftiebuckleys @swiftiediaz @constructiononsunset @loveyourownsmiilee @lostinabuddiehaze @spotsandsocks @elvensorceress @rewritetheending @ajunerose @shortsighted-owl and anyone else who wants to do this!!
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moonstruckme · 24 days
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Hi!! Could you do a Bodyguard!James Potter x reader where he is guarding her during a high profile event and something happens? With a bit of angst to fluff? If you’re comfortable of course! I hope you have a wonderful day, i’m new to your page and ADORED your bodyguard james. <3
Thanks for requesting lovely <3
cw: guns, shooting
bodyguard!James x fem!reader ♡ 1k words
You shift your stance a bit and have to bite down on a whimper. 
“I’m going to have to throw these shoes out after this,” you mutter to James. “I’m pretty sure there’s blood pooling around my toes.” 
“You wanna take them off?” he murmurs back, lips barely moving as he keeps his face in a mask of businesslike impassivity. 
You sigh. “I wish.” 
“You could. Just step out of them, no one’s looking over here.” 
It’s true. Every camera in the chamber is pointed to where your mom stands on the podium, her right hand raised as she takes her oath. As much as you hate coming to these things, you can’t ignore the kernel of pride shining behind your sternum. She’s waited so long for this day, dealt with so much opposition, and now she’s finally going to be able to enact some real change. You can keep up appearances for her. 
“I’d better not risk it,” you tell James. “With my luck, the second I do—” 
You’re on the ground before you even register the sound of glass shattering. James’ grip on your shoulder is harsh, almost painful, but the noise that follows has enough adrenaline spiking your bloodstream to forget about that. The loud, rapid popping of gunfire fills the chamber. 
James’ hand moves to clasp around your elbow, but you tear away from him, headed in the opposite direction. The podium is empty. Where’s your mom? Did they get her already? Is she hurt? Did she—
You’re not fast enough to outpace James, definitely not limping around in your heels, and he gets an arm around your waist, hauling you away from the center aisle. You can’t tell where the gunfire is coming from—who has the guns?—but he pushes your head down before you can look. A low buzzing burrows into your ears. You try again to go to where you last saw your mom, but James yanks you back to his side, a cutting “Stop” hissing past his lips. Any other time, a tone like that would have you stilling like a frightened bunny, but you know he’s not the danger here. 
When you don’t listen, he lifts you off the ground. The crowd is swarming, frantic and disorganized, but James maneuvers through it expertly, running down the hall until he finds an unlocked door. The bathroom door swings open for you, and James sets you down quickly, locking it before you have a second to recover. 
You lunge for the door anyway, only for twin bands to wrap around your middle. They pin your arms to your sides and press you securely to James’ front. 
“Stop. Stop it.” His tone is as hard as his grip, dispassionate to your struggling. “You cannot fight me when you’re in danger, understand?” 
“They’re not here for me,” you plead. Your voice is scratchy with desperation. 
“No, but I am. I’m here for you.” His hold tightens, but now it’s less a restraint than a comfort. You can feel his heavy breaths tickling past your ear. “Your mom has her own detail, okay? She made it out before we did, they probably have her somewhere safe.” 
Now you can hear your breathing too. Short, stilted pants that wheeze in and out of you. You think you might be shaking. 
“That’s enough,” James says gently, starting to lower you both to the ground. Your knees give easily, relinquishing your weight to his hold until he settles you both on the tiled floor. “That’s enough, alright? Can I let you go now?” 
You’re not sure you want him to anymore, but you nod. He slips out from behind you, checking the lock on the bathroom door and then removing his gun from the holster at his hip. The sight of it makes your trembling worsen. He checks something with it while murmuring to the people on the other end of his earpiece, convoluted jargon you’ve long since ceased paying attention to. 
“She’s fine,” he says after a minute. “Your mom. They got her into an office, and now we’re all just waiting for security to clear the building before we can go.” 
You drop your head to your knees, relief like a tidal wave washing over you. You hear James’ footsteps move back toward you before his big hand lands on your head. It smooths down your hair as he squats next to you. When you glance at his gun balanced on his knee, he catches the look. 
“I have to keep this out for now,” he says, looking you in your eyes like he’s making a promise, “but the safety’s staying on unless someone tries to come in here. Okay?” 
“Yeah.” You nod, still trying to get your breathing under control. 
James strokes your head again, his touch weighty and reassuring. The noise outside of the bathroom seems to be lessening, but you’re not sure how much sound is blocked by the door. There could be shooting still happening just past it, people hurt or dying in the halls. 
“I’m sorry for fighting you so hard,” you say quietly. 
James blows out a breath. “I get it,” he admits. “In those situations, it’s natural to freak out and head toward the person you want to keep safe.” He flashes you a little smile. “I’m lucky it’s already my job to do that.” You grimace back, but his expression grows serious again when he says, “You just have to keep your head, though, you know? The whole reason you and your mom have protection is to make sure someone else is already looking out for you. You don’t need to worry about her, you just need to trust me.” 
You look at him. His body is still taut, ready for a fight if one comes to him, but his expression is gentle. It’s easy to forget it’s his job to take care of you when he seems to do it so naturally. Caring emanates from James like it’s the core component of his soul. 
“I do trust you,” you tell him. 
His mouth slants, expression unbearably fond. “I know, sweetheart. We’ll work on those instincts, okay? I get that it’s not an easy adjustment to make.” 
“Have you ever had to do that? Run away from the person you cared about the most?” 
He shakes his head. “Like I said, I’m lucky. I always get to run towards you.”
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urdepressedslut · 9 months
Text
You’re Mine, Sunshine ❝part five❞
♡ Pairing: Grumpy!Bodyguard!Bucky Barnes x Sunshine!Fem!Reader
♡ Summary: Getting to know each other better doesn’t go according to plan. Bucky has to comfort you and fix the mess he made. Will you forgive him?
♡ Warnings: self hate, mentions of parent death/family death, panic attack, heavy angst, fluff, literally sobbing i love them
Part 6
Trope ⇢ Grumpy x Sunshine | Mob!Au Bodyguard!Au
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It was almost becoming a mantra, reminding himself daily that he needed to keep things strictly professional. He just didn’t realize how hard it would be. You were so easy to be around, it was a different change of pace with you, he felt he could actually think— slow his mind down around you.
He had tried to digest the thought many times.
I could be her friend, nothing more.
Would it be unprofessional though? He tries to think how Pierce would react to that. He feels completely and utterly confused— the devil and angel on his shoulders battling constantly.
Even then, he was already a bad friend— if that. He was keeping something from you— something extreme. He had caught himself thinking of where you could be in the house— the part of him deep down wanting to tell you. He knew he should, but he knew that’s not what Pierce wanted. If anything, Bucky didn’t want to mess anything up— or he’d never see you again. The thought shouldn’t of scared him as much as it did, but he didn’t like it.
That’s where he found himself in the bathroom of his room, staring into his own eyes through the reflection. He had showered and caught himself trying to find a nice shirt amongst his clothes— immediately he stopped. He had to take a moment to take a deep breath and remind himself how ridiculous he was being.
It had been so long since he actually cared about his appearance. But as he was scanning every line and wrinkle on his face in the mirror— he knew he was doomed. Suddenly he felt insecure, and for once it wasn’t about his arm. His mind was consumed with the thought if he was good enough. While he felt overwhelmed, because he had never worried about such a thing. Well, in awhile at least.
You had kept yourself busy in the library for most of the day, and while you looked to be buried into the books— your thoughts were of him. You couldn’t ignore the giddy feeling that his words gave you— his want to get to know you better. Maybe, just maybe— he wanted to be your friend.
Just as you were about to get up and leave to seek out Bucky, you heard the sound of the library doors opening. A smile worked its way onto your face, excited to see him— though you had just seen him not that long ago.
Heavy footsteps echoed through the space, and soon revealed a handsome looking Bucky. Your mouth hung slightly open, his appearance looking sharper than usual. He was wearing his classic black shirt, and had the black leather jacket over— along with his jeans that hugged him just right in all the areas. He wasn’t dressed all that different, so why did he look so good.
You cleared your throat and broke your stare— yes he looked good. But you shouldn’t stare.
“You look great James, I wish I would’ve put something better on.” You laughed nervously, looking down at your t-shirt and shorts— along with your different colored socks.
Bucky on the other hand, thought you looked fine. He was pretty sure you could wear pretty much anything and look good in it. He also shook off your compliment, thinking you were just being sweet like you always were.
“You look fine, (Y/n).” He assured you.
Truthfully, standing here in front of you now— Bucky wants nothing more than to go back upstairs, choosing to avoid getting to know you better. He wasn’t sure why his walls were coming down so easily, but he hated it. Oh he hated it— he hated you.
“So…” You started, walking back to your seat. Bucky followed after and took his spot from the nights before. “I know this kinda takes the fun out of this but— I had a list of questions.”
Bucky shook his head but chuckled lowly, not surprised at all.
“Of course you do.” He acknowledged, and you scratched the back of your neck nervously.
“Uh— but there are rules! I made them up of course— but there aren’t many.” You rushed out, sitting crisscrossed in your seat.
Bucky exhaled annoyed, but couldn’t really argue otherwise. This was his idea. Was it to distract you from going out? Yes. But a part of him really did want to get to know you better.
“Alright, what’s the rules?” He asked, crossing his leg over the other— leaning back in his seat.
“Okay the first one— you have to answer the question that’s asked, no matter what.” You told him, watching him raise his eyebrows.
“Easy.”
You giggled, remembering how fast the conversation ended last time because he didn’t want to answer. This would be harder than he thought— but you wouldn’t call him out on it.
“Second rule— Can’t ask dumb questions.” You told him, and he chuckled again.
“That’s the second rule?” He chuckled, and you nodded your head.
“Yup.” You confirmed, “Okay— who should go first?”
You were ready to jump right into it, while Bucky was still thinking about your rules— rethinking his decision to do this.
“Why don’t you start doll, since you apparently have a list.” He spoke sarcastically, and you couldn’t stop the heat from rising to your cheeks at the nickname.
He never called you that before, and you didn’t know what to think of it.
“Um… okay yeah,” You thought about your first question, deciding to go easy on him at first, “What’s something you like to do on your free time?”
Bucky squinted his eyes, expecting a more personal question from you. He also had to think for a second— what did he like to do? He used to have hobbies at one time, but he couldn’t recall any in the moment. He felt he was a pretty boring person. There was one thing.
“I like to read sometimes.” He answered, and you smiled at that.
“Really? You don’t seem to spend a lot of time in the library for someone who likes to read.” You joked— knowing he was rather busy with his job as a bodyguard.
“Well, if I had free time— I’d probably be here.” He pointed out, slowly melting into his seat, his muscles relaxing against the couch.
“Okay your turn.” You told him.
Bucky didn’t want to admit it, but he as well had a list of questions for you. Things he was dying to know about you.
“What do you want to do in the future?” He asked, and you looked at him with furrowed brows.
“Huh?”
“What’s your dream job— like, what do you want to do for the rest of your life? Besides read.” He added at the end, making you giggle.
You thought about your answer for a moment, smiling to yourself when you came up with one.
“I’m not sure I’ll ever stay in one spot, there’s so much I want to do. But whatever happens, I wanna volunteer places. I want to help people— help them heal, cope. I just wanna do good.” You explained happily.
Bucky was not surprised by your answer by the slightest— of course you wanted to be helpful. It only made sense with your bubbly personality. He cleared his throat, fighting down a smile.
“Your turn again.”
You nodded and took a second to think of a question again, closing your eyes in thought. An idea popped into your head and you were hesitant about it. Last time you’d brought it up— he left.
“What’s your family like?” You asked anyway, keeping your voice soft in hopes he’d feel more comfortable.
Bucky tensed immediately and just glared at you for a second. His jaw clenched, and his eyes squinted at you. He was annoyed at you pestering him with this question— he’d answer every single one but this one. He’d play dirty if you were.
“My family… isn’t around anymore.” He answered quietly, his anger lacing his words.
His tone had you swallowing nervously, and deep down you regretted asking him. You didn’t mean any harm by the question, and you immediately felt bad. Your heart hurt for him, the way he didn’t have a family.
“I— James I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t o—”
You tried to apologize but got cut off.
“My turn.” He interrupted, sitting up in his seat now. His whole body tense again, his relaxed muscles no more. “Why does your Father hate you?”
He couldn’t stop himself from letting the words out, but as soon as they passed his lips— he was ashamed of himself. His face softened immediately at your face dropping, the way your fingers started to fiddle anxiously with the hem of your shirt.
You were shocked— at a loss for words. You probably deserved his anger, but you weren’t expecting such a harsh question. You felt your chest tighten, and suddenly you weren’t in denial anymore. Everything you’d ever thought— the nights you wondered if your Father really did hate you. You pushed away with a laugh, knowing he could never. But now as someone else witnessed it, and pointed it out. It ought to be true— and you felt sick.
“Um… He’s just having a h-hard time with the passing of my…” You tried to take a deep breath, feeling your throat tighter than usual. “Hard time with my mothers passing is all.”
You repeated from the first day meeting him. Your head pounded— your ears thumping loudly. Your fingers were numb and you felt like you couldn’t swallow.
Were you having an allergic reaction to something?
You tried to take another deep breath and felt your chest stop expanding. Your eyes widened in panic for a second.
Bucky felt so shitty— he couldn’t control himself for a simple question. The fact that you had answered it anyway broke his heart. He watched as your eyes darted around, in search of help. The way he could start to hear your breathing— the way you were beginning to wheeze.
“(Y/n), you ok—”
“Excuse m-me for a s-second.” You rushed out, stumbling out of your chair and towards the library doors.
Bucky was concerned for you, standing up immediately to go follow you. He was so ashamed of himself, angry that he let himself lose control like that. He had sensitive topics that just brought up a defensive side in him. The image of your face as soon as he had said the words was burned into his brain. You didn’t deserve that— you had been nothing be sweet since you two had met.
Making it up the stairs, he started down the hallway— body tensing in alert at the sight of you sitting up against the hallway wall. He rushed forward, kneeling down to your curled up form, scanning over you for injuries.
“(Y/n), what’s wrong? Are you hurt?” He asked frantic, he noticed your hand clutching the area above your heart.
You shook your head, but seemed confused— and only panicked more when you couldn’t get the words out right away.
“I c-can’t breathe!” You wheezed out, your hand not clutching your chest— reaching out to grab onto Bucky.
You held onto him like he was your lifeline.
“I-I think I’m having a-an allergic reaction.” You panted, fisting Bucky’s sleeve in panic.
Bucky didn’t know it was possible for his heart to break anymore— but he swore he heard the cracking sound. He felt it drop to his stomach, his own throat tightening with emotions. You were having a panic attack— and it was because of him. You had no idea, and yet here you were still clinging onto him when he was the cause of it all. He was disgusted with himself.
“(Y/n)— you’re not having an allergic reaction. You’re having a panic attack.” He explained to you clearly, holding onto your shoulders, trying to bring you comfort.
You nodded in understanding, feeling lightheaded from lack of oxygen to the brain. Tears began to escape your eyes, you felt helpless— you felt like you were dying.
“James…” You whimpered, “I’m s-scared!”
Again, he felt his non existent heart break again— falling into his stomach. He felt sick watching this go down, wanting nothing more than for this all to be a nightmare.
He had experience with panic attacks and luckily knew what to do— he just couldn’t get over the fact that he caused it.
He grabbed your hand fisting his sleeve and put it above his heart. You lifted your flushed face, your bloodshot eyes watching your hand. You could feel the strong thump of his heartbeat, the feeling soothing against your palm.
“I want you to try and breathe with me, okay? I want you to match my heartbeat. You feel it?” He asked you softly, his voice gentle like honey.
You nodded your head, trying to focus on slowing your breathing— stop your chaotic mind from spiraling.
“In… and out— In… and out.” He started breathing, and you struggled to match him at first, but as your eyes met with his— you felt your heartbeat start to match his rhythm.
His eyes were comforting and warm. You felt safe in his hold— and you could already start to feel your everything relaxing.
“Good, just keep breathing with me. I’ve got you— you’re gonna be okay.” He assured you, rubbing your shoulders up and down soothingly.
You knew you’d be risking it, but you slowly moved forward— wrapping your arms around his bulky frame.
Bucky tensed up at first, a part of him knowing he should push you away— this wasn’t professional. But he knew he couldn’t— not after what he did. He relaxed, and wrapped his arms hesitantly around your back, hugging you tight against him. He could feel your quick heartbeat thumping competitively against his. He could feel your breath fanning his neck— as you rested your chin in the crook of his neck.
He hadn’t felt such affection in so long— he had missed how much he craved the protection— the security he felt being in someone’s arms.
Now, in Bucky’s hold— you felt at peace. You knew he’d never let anything happen to you. You still trusted him with your life.
“Doll,” You smiled weakly into his neck, “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t of asked you that— I’m an asshole.”
You held onto him tighter— enjoying the embrace while you had it. You were sure it would never happen again.
“It’s okay James, I’m sorry too.” You weakly replied, your body drained of energy. “Thank you, I feel a lot better now.”
He wanted to scoff. You wanted to thank him for helping you out of a mess that he caused. You had the right to scream, punch, kick him. But he knew you’d never do that— and that’s what killed him.
He didn’t know how to respond to your thanks, and stayed silent instead. Holding onto you— never intending to let go until you did first.
“I’m tired James.” You mumbled sleepily.
“I’ve got you doll.” He whispered, easily standing with you in his arms.
He slowly and carefully carried you to your room, setting you down gently onto your bed. He was having déjà vu— memories of when he first carried you to bed that one night.
He lifted the covers, tucking you in. He watched you for a second, examining your face like you were a piece of art. His eyes danced all the way from your chin— passed your lips— to your eyes. Before he could stop himself, he was reaching out to brush a loose strand of hair out of your face. You sighed and leaned into his touch, and this time— he didn’t fight the smile down. He gazed down at you warmly, genuinely smiling for the first time in awhile.
“Stay with me.” You mumbled sleepily, just as you had wanted to that one night.
Bucky took a deep breath, staring down at you with sudden tenderness. He shook his head, ridding his mind of the thought.
“Okay.” He told you, watching you give a small smile in your sleep. Snuggling your face into the pillow.
Although both of you didn’t really get to scratch off every question of each others list— you both felt more connected after today. You just wanted someone, someone constant in your life. Bucky needed more light in his life— like you.
You both needed each other more than you realized.
🤍 taglist is officially closed for this series 🤍
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