#bones bloopers live in my head rent free | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

2rocksandastoner · 8 months

Text

WHAT YOUR GO-TO MARIO PARTY CHARACTER SAYS ABOUT YOU:

Mario: You’ve never played video games and you don’t really know who else to choose. If that’s not the case, then wtf is wrong with you

Luigi: You recognize that Luigi is #1 and that he deserves better. You’re pretty cool

Peach: You’re a 5 year old girl who’s only playing because your mom forced your siblings to let you in, you’re a female twitch streamer that probably sucks at the game but you still have a really good setup and view count, you’re a trans girl looking for euphoria, or you’re a roseboy

Daisy: You recognize who the superior princess is (if this is the case you probably hate Peach), OR someone took Peach before you could get to her and now you’re salty

Yoshi: You’re cool, probably have quite the appetite, and like how cute and carefree he is. You would die for Yoshi. You may also really like Kirby

Birdo: Trans rights, nice

Wario: You watch Family Guy unironically and like offending people for fun. You’d call someone a snowflake no matter what, even if they cried after you stabbed them. You’re a scumbag cis teen boy who’s totally about to cheat, especially if playing with little siblings/cousins. You need to touch grass urgently, but even more so if you’re an adult. You also think racism/bigotry in general is inherently funny. It’s not and you’re probably a walking red flag. How do you sleep at night

Waluigi: You’re jacked and get so many bitches. You’re a god at the game. Your friends adore you, you have an enormous dick if applicable, and you’ll get into a great university but will never get into Smash. Or you’re just in it for the meme and this is your entire sense of humour and it’s annoying 😐 Either way, you may be kind of a loser, but the font of loser may vary. You may also cheat at the game every so often but you’re not the salty type like Wario

Toad: You’re really annoying. Like, it’s your whole personality. You do have potential as a person unlike most people who play Wario, but this is still becoming a problem in your day to day life. Please seek help buckeroo, it gets better.

Toadette: You’re either a little girl or a grown man. If you’re neither of those, you’re cute, do you want my number?

Koopa: You’re scrawny and quiet. You also may not have much of a personality. You may also be a bit of a simp. Do you wanna pick another character?

Dry Bones: You’re scrawny and quiet but also kinda hot. Want my number? Also you may be alt/emo and have fringey hair and you probably don’t have the best diet but who am I to judge

Goomba: …did you hit that one on accident? If not, have you been doing okay mate? If I were to take a wild guess, you just need a blorbo in your life and happen to have questionable taste. Idk man but you’re difficult to read and I don’t like it

Hammer Bro: You’re a teen boy (likely cis) who wants to stand out from those who play Koopa (though you’re not much of a simp). You may also be kind of a dick like those who play Wario (though you have plenty of potential to grow and change as you get older), and you fight your friends with sticks for fun. You also may have had a nerf or sonic phase, and may also like metalworking, cars, or other stereotypical cis male stuff. You would probably call me a slur.

Boo: See Dry Bones, but you may not be scrawny. You’re a bit spooky, quiet, and intimidating at first but really really cool. You don’t smile a whole lot but you’re chill. You dye your hair a lot. Want my number?

Blooper: what

Kamek/Magikoopa: You’re probably a mage in any RPG game. Speaking of which you’re probably a nerd and probably not very into Mario Party. I’d still probably have a short lived crush on you. Keep your nerdy lil head up, fren

Shy Guy: You’re a shy guy yourself, or the feminized version of Shy Guy lives in your head rent free and also you’re trans. Regardless you’re kinda quiet, and you’re cool but either don’t see it, or you know it and (this may or may not be related) you’re kinda quiet (if related, it’s likely because that’s how some cool kids do it. Whatever floats your goat, man.) You’re chill/laid back

Spike: You just wanna be cool like the older cousins you’re playing with because they’re your favourites and you never get to see them, but you’re loud/talk too much and might be kind of annoying. Don’t worry, we know you’re trying your best. Keep smiling, friend :)

Monty Mole: You like to remain somewhat anonymous and blend in with the crowd. Everyone you play Mario Party with questions you, but you understand Monty. Monty probably understands you too in a way

Pom Pom: I have your social security number. Wtf is wrong with you? Where did your life go wrong? You’re certainly not okay in the membrane (as Lily would say). Stop

Bowser: Hey Daddy, I ain’t nobody’s butler but what kind of sandwich do you want me to make you? Pls take my number, there’s a chance you’re a red flag but the green flags who play Bowser are good enough to risk it all for 😍

Bowser Jr: You’re me. You also really like the Koopalings and wish you could play as them. Bowser Jr is your little blorbo and you love him to death. You’re cool. If that’s not the case, you’re the little sibling or cousin that nobody wants to play with because you’re a sore loser and a brat (and you know it and take pride in pissing everyone off) but everyone has to put up with you bc your parents/relatives/etc said they have to. If you’re an adult and fall within the latter category, you’re horrible to smoke with and you tend to get no bitches (I get bitches and run a stoner podcast loved by the rocks and our lovely listeners, it does get better mate) (link in pinned post to both the podcast itself and the trailer if you wanna listen to something stupid, we really appreciate your support!! <33)

Rosalina: You’re not as cool as you wish you were (at least not in your eyes), but your taste in women (if applicable) is pretty good. You want to be like Rosalina irl. Out of the main 3 Mario Girls, if Rosalina is your favourite, Daisy is likely your second favourite

Donkey Kong: You would rather play as Funky Kong, which is a red flag in itself, or you have big dick energy and are either jacked or <5’3”. Also, 🎶 D.K… Donkey, Kong… 🎶

Diddy Kong: You’re like the Toad players but think you’re special. You will either grow up to be homophobic just like your father, or you’re a trans preteen. You like arson and jetpacks, and you have may have trouble growing facial hair if applicable

Something feels missing here but I tend to be able to read people really well, lmk if you guys want one with every Mario Kart character :3

Bonus, Koopa Kid: damn youre old

3 notes · View notes