#both in dialogue with other people (like joking at the end of cos about how the dursleys would probably be disappointed he didn't die)

[swordsmans]

a lengthy breakdown of why ch. 878 is one of the best luffy moments in the entire series (to me)

question: favorite luffy moment?

oooomg it would have to be the scene in ch. 878 immediately after pedro's death--when luffy 1) snaps the crew out of their grief because they're in danger, 2) comes up with an extremely efficient escape plan for his crew 3) comes up with an extremely efficient plan to deal with katakuri 4) snaps the crew out of their grief again 5) gets the crew to execute their escape 6) executes his own plan (+ bonus moment in 880/881 because it's technically the "end" of this scene).

this whole moment on the ship is the Captain Of The Straw Hat Pirates moment for me. hang on, i'm gonna include manga caps because i dont think ive ever talked about the way the dialogue is set up in this scene before and im stealing this opportunity lmao

like, we almost never see luffy really engage with his role as captain and leader in a traditional sense--yes, he's captain, but in most arcs he fits the "The Big Guy" role more than the leader, and often the broader captain-ish duties fall to other characters (e.g. planning and executing strategy outside of battle, mostly). like, half of the entire joke in both dressrosa and wano is that luffy doesn't plan (even though we, the readers, know that he does) and yet in WCI he not only showcases his skills as a leader but does so flawlessly.

(for context, "The Big Guy" is basically the trope of like... the most powerful person, the one you know is always going to win/solve any problem by the end of it--the character who's going to fight the biggest bad in a story and who often can't deal with "little" problems within a story because it would undermine the internal logic of a story's power-scaling. i have many thoughts on The Big Guy and i think one piece is one of the few series that does it well, along with spyxfamily re: yor... but i digress.)

so here's where i think the "moment" starts in ch. 878. for a refresher, in ch. 877 luffy+co reach the sunny, fine chopper/brook encased in candy, katakuri attacks, big mom attacks, the sunny gets stuck in candy, and then pedro sacrifices himself. at this point in time, luffy+co have been on the ship for all of a few seconds--in 877, nami is trying to set up a coup de burst and explain how it works to jinbei at the same time, luffy is holding off katakuri, but nothing is really happening. when pedro sacrifices himself no one knows what his plan is so they don't have time to incorporate it into their escape strategy (which is basically nonexistent at this point). then--wham! pedro is down, the candy breaks, and there's a split-second of decision time that luffy jumps on, which brings us to 878

everyone is shocked and grieving, their tentative set-up is completely derailed, and luffy immediately takes charge--starting with "can we fly, nami?!"

he addresses nami as the navigator/in charge of the physical ship itself a this point (+ she set up the coup de burst in 877), then addresses the crew as a whole in "let's set sail, people!!"--like, the way this is phrased sets him apart slightly as someone with the authority to speak to the group as a whole; he's getting everyone's attention. then his declaration!!! "if we waste this moment... then we throw away his sacrifice!!"

he's completely taking charge of the situation and focusing on getting the rest of the crew to safety. it is his job as captain to look out for the whole, so he doesn't waste a second--which is so incredible, because we know luffy is emotional, that's his whole thing. he's incredibly emotionally-driven and emotionally-intelligent, but during this entire scene he is being emotionally driven to protect his crew, which in turn gives time for his (often-overlooked) intelligence and pragmatism to shine.

once he has everyone's attention as a group, he goes back to addressing crew members individually--which i think is really important because that's, like, literally what you do in a crisis when you're taking charge. you get everyone on the same page, then you single people out so no one feels lost or unmoored--everyone has something to do, everyone feels included in the solution in some way.

in these two pages alone, he addresses nami, chopper, and brook individually, and then jinbei responds (so he's also participating individually). i think the fact that carrot is excluded here also kind of supports this whole thing, because carrot isn't technically a straw hat--luffy isn't her captain, even though she's under his protection at this point. here, he's ordering his crew in his capacity as a leader.

and then, of course, there's the moment:

yes, he's talking to katakuri here, but he's also on the sunny's deck screaming--and his address to the crew doesn't have a distinct "end point" from a dialogue perspective, he just gets cut off when katakuri attacks carrot. here, i think he's declaring this as much to katakuri as the straw hats themselves. i think the "end" of this whole scene in 880/881 when he reassures the crew (after holding the fucking mirror shards in his mouth--god this whole scene is just so good) that everything will be fine supports this, too, because that feels like the end of the crew address to me. but i'll get there.

now that he has the crew on track to execute their own escape (by giving them step by step orders to do so, basically), he tackles the katakuri problem. at this point, he's already figured out what to do, because he's gearing up for the elephant gun grip that he uses to pull katakuri into the mirror world, and he doesn't tell anyone else his plan because it's his responsibility as captain to take care of the crew (as opposed to just his responsibility as The Big Guy to take out the strongest enemy, which--if we were just adhering to The Big Guy trope, i think he would have shouted his plan along with everything else. basically authority [no one needs to know my plan because it's my responsibility to handle it and i know i will] vs. equality [im the strongest but we're all in this together so here's what im going to do], and he's authority.)

then we get another crew address, this time starting individually then talking to the group. they see the shadow--they realize pedro has died but perospero has survived--nami is seconds from absolutely spiraling again (just look at that panel of her, oh my god). further proof that luffy is the most emotionally intelligent character in the entire series, luffy immediately redirects everyone's attention a second time, focusing them away from their grief again and onto their own escape again.

since this is, like, a second wave of grief/horror, he starts with the individual address--snapping everyone out of it directly because a whole-crew address might not cut it and he needs to include carrot, here.

then mid-address, he grabs brulee and starts executing his katakuri takedown plan. his focus here is entirely on keeping his crew safe in the most efficient way possible, and in two pages we get: assessing the situation (grief 2) -> solving the immediate problem (the escape plan starts to derail, everyone needs to snap back out of it) -> solving the next problem (katakuri) -> inspiring them to carry on because he's about to leave.

(seriously. i cannot overstate how great the brulee grab mid-dialogue is in the broader context of this scene. seriously.)

(also, the way the group -> individual -> individual -> group address works in this whole scene feels like such a beautiful closed dialogue loop... even on a structural level it's designed to have the biggest possible impact. love u oda.)

then, of course, we have the culmination of this whole thing--the mirror smash. with ruthless efficiency, he not only isolates the biggest immediate threat (katakuri) but also the character who poses the biggest danger to the crew's escape--brulee. all three of them have been completely separated from his crew, and now he can both keep an eye on brulee and the mirrors (which is most of 880/881), the "intelligence" part of the plan, and confront katakuri directly, the "battle" part of the plan.

also, the decision to isolate katakuri works both ways here--he's not only protecting the crew from katakuri as an enemy, but he's also protecting the crew from their fight. we see in subsequent chapters that the katakuri fight absolutely decimates the mirror world. if they were to face off anywhere near the sunny, people would get hurt. if katakuri were to escape, not only could he harm the crew but luffy would have to give chase and bring the fight back to katakuri, wherever he ends up (attacking the crew). i fully believe the decision to isolate brulee shows that he's aware of this--their fight has to stay in the mirror world, because the only way he'll win is by operating at full power and his full power is destructive.

also--this moment is just really cool, okay? it's so, so cool.

honorable mention to the rest of this "scene" as it's continued in the next few chapters, specifically the way this whole thing culminates--luffy holding the last mirror shards in his mouth to make sure he can communicate his final reassurances to the crew without the risk of those shards falling into enemy hands.

to me, this is as solidly and completely an "i'm the captain of this ship!" moment as the declaration itself, and every time i think about it for more than 0.2 seconds i start to go crazy. but. it it technically a different "moment" (and is also extremely self-explanatory) so i won't go into it here.

also, side note because this didn't fit anywhere--i think this scene not only stands on its own as one of luffy's most badass moments but also works as a really amazing example of his character growth--particularly compared to scenes like the usopp fight in water 7 (different scenario technically because usopp isn't an enemy, but it is one of the premier moments when he struggles with the burden of being captain).

anyway, sorry this got stupid long *jazz hands*

#one piece #luffy #op analysis #i dont know if i have any kind of tag for this stuff actually #since i almost never do anything like this outside of dms #however... this is also a perfect example of why i DONT rlly do analysis outside the dms... because it's stupid long #gyro.txt

[hello-nichya-here]

Concerning Friends: With Chandler being your favourite, could you explain what draws you to him? What you find interesting in his character, in his development? Love hearing your takes on..well, literally everything 🤍

Gladly!

Chandler Bing Appreciation

Humor

The first thing that comes to my mind when I think of Chandler is "He's the funniest of the cast", and considering the competition he had, that's a pretty big accomplishment. I'm a sucker for sarcastic jokes, and Chandler was the king of it. I always liked how he could think of hilarious replies to literally everything everyone said so fast, and his way of delivering the jokes was so specific to him that even the show itself poked fun at it.

And I loved how, just like he was quick to make jokes at everyone else's expense, he also did it to himself, which showed both that he could take a joke AND that he was very insecure. To quote one of my favorite exchanges between him and Rachel (that I totally don't relate to on a spiritual level)

R: You should never be allowed to talk to people! C: I'm sure you're right, but why?!

Him being Joey's best friend also created a lot of naturally funny moments because Joey was way more confident, and far dumber, than Chandler, so one of them is always being the butt of a joke just by being next to the other.

I promise this whole thing won't be just quotes, but nothing better exemplifies what I mean quite like this bit of dialogue when they're discussing possibly having a threesome with a girl, and flipping a coin to decide on which end each will be:

J: What's heads and what's tails? C: If you don't know that, then I don't wanna do this with you.

But my absolute favorite thing about the jokes written for Chandler was that they often poked fun at the show itself, like him responding to Monica giving him a key to her appartment with "Door hasn't been locked in five years, but okay", or making fun of typical Ross and Rachel drama, or just point out how completely absurd some of the situations they got into was, like when Ross was murdering everyone's ears while playing bagpipes for Chandler and Monica's wedding.

M: Why is your family scottish? C: Why is your family Ross?

The guy also looked funny. I've seen one of the directors say Matthew was always aware of the camera, and it shows, because he is always doing something, even in the background, mainly funny faces to react to what the other five are doing. And that led to lots of improv on his part, and you can actually see some of the other actors breaking character in the background because they couldn't hold back the laughter.

His physical comedy was great, and nothing puts a smile on my face quite like seeing Chandler make a joke just a little bity funnier by jumping up when reacting to stuff, or doing a little dance out of the blue - or even better, reacting to stuff that was not supposed to happen. One of my favorite exemples of it in the whole show is him and Rachel (a criminally underused comedic duo of the show) in her office, with him trying to convince her to uncuff him after he hooked up with her boss, and Matthew's face just breaks me every single time I see it.

Combine his habit of playing off of EVERYTHING with the improvs both from him and co-stars, and you have little moments like this one in which Ross gets a call from his second (ex) wife and Matthew just reacts to David's improv on instinct, then doesn't know what to do next:

Seriously: could he be more iconic?

Trauma, Insecurities & Awkwardness

For all of his hilarity, Chandler also had quite a lot of emotional baggage that he often either refused to deal with or didn't know how to deal with.

His parents were a disaster, with the dad cheating, the mom hooking up with one of his friends when he was already very uncomfortable with how much he (and everyone) knew about her sex-life and sexual fantasies - to the point that Chandler legitimately thought it was normal for kids to have seen orgies - and, more importantly, he was told about ALL the drama of their messy divorce, and even at his wedding they were at each other's throats.

He went through a lot as a child and naturally that affected how he acted as an adult, making him a messy, flawed, sympathetic character. It was easy not to judge him too much for things like his deeply dysfunctional on-again off-again relationship with Janice, or the moments of immaturity/anxiety in his romance with Monica - especially because he did make progress and grew a lot.

But the dude was also a mess in other (deeply relatable) ways. He flew to Yemen to avoid telling his ex he didn't want to get back together. He lied to said ex about still having feelings for her/wanting to have an affair so she wouldn't show up at his wedding/move to the house next to his. He lied about not being able to come home and was actually gonna let Joey think Monica was cheating, just to not have to tell his best friend that he wanted to spend the night with his wife instead of hanging out. This man let a co-worker call him by the wrong name for months, got in the way of him getting a promotion, then helped the dude trash his office - all to avoid going through the awkwardness of correcting him.

There's a reason he said stuff like "What must it be like not to be crippled by fear and self-loathing?"

A Caring Friend

Even though Chandler didn't think very highly of himself, another thing that made him a personal favorite for me is that he clearly had a very kind, loving side.

He invited both of his parents to his wedding even after all the shit they pulled. His goodbye to Rachel at the end of the show broke my heart in a million little pieces because he was just so sweet to her. He and Joey were so close they were practically a couple, and when he fell for his girlfriend and kissed her, he not only confessed, he was willing to not go after her because he wanted to prove to Joey he'd never betray him again. There's also a "Joey room" in the house he and Monica bought at the end of the show.

Even though his romance with Janice was a mess, he was a really good boyfriend to her when she was leaving her husband for him - and then he stepped aside when Janice realized she still had feelings for the guy, so her kid would not grow up with two dysfunctional parents like he did.

Those moments made the character feel far more real and, once again, made it a lot easier for me to still feel a lot of sympathy for him even when he was in the wrong.

But come on. If we're REALLY gonna talk about Chandler's sweet, caring, understanding, mature side, we gotta talk about the person that brought it out the most.

Chandler & Monica

Mondler, Mondler, Mondler. The best couple on the show without a shadow of a doubt, and possibly one of the best sitcom couples in history. And it was the dynamic that allowed Chandler to develop as a character and let the qualities he already had be front and center in many episodes.

Before the writers even considered pairing them up, we already Chandler offer to be her boyfriend/husband and father of her kids later in life if she doesn't find someone. Monica is offended the first time because why wouldn't she have found someone by then, and in the second time she just laughs because, come on, they're friends, JUST friends????? It'd neeeeever happen.

Both are played for laughs (though Monica does let him try to win her over the second time), but they already highlight some very important things:

1 - Chandler cares so much about Monica that just saying "I'm sure you'll find someone eventually" isn't enough. He has to assure her that even if nothing goes according to plan, she'll still have someone to grow old with.

2 - As early as season one, Chandler already liked and trusted Monica enough that he was not at all hesitant to suggest "Hey, maybe you and I could get together in the future and even have kids." I remind you that at that point in the story Chandler had never so much as let one of his girlfriends have a drawer with their things in his home due to his fear of commitment, and he had assumed EVERY COUPLE broke up after their first fight because pretty much none of his previous relationships survived it (except Janice, but that was more of a "They DID break up, they just got back together later" kind of deal).

And that last point is really made it so easy for audiences to get attached to their romance - which was originally only going to last a couple of episodes! They were already super comfortable with each other and were clearly compatible, which allowed their relationship to progress without the need for the neverending drama, Ross and Rachel style.

Monica was neurotic, had a serious case of OCD, could be very bossy, often needed things done ONE way and one way only - which meant Chandler always knew where he stood with her. If something was wrong, she'd tell him. If she said she was happy and loved him, he could believe her more easily because she simply could not fake it when something was bothering her.

Much like Chandler, her family life was not at all ideal (due to her parents pretty openly liking Ross more than her) and she had tons of self-esteem issues (again, because of her parents and because she used to be overweight) - but she also take a joke, or at the very least, make fun of people right back. I think Chandler related to that.

And, more importantly, their friend group had not imploded after Ross and Rachel's relationship ended very badly, twice. So Chandler just knew that, even if he and Monica didn't work out, it wouldn't be the end of the world, or of their friendship.

It made perfect sense that lots of his typical paranoia didn't affect him as much during their relationship, because by that point he just knew that Monica would always be part of his life.

But the writers also didn't make the mistake of dropping his insecurities, anxiety and even immaturity completely. They came back every now then, sometimes for jokes, other times in a more serious way.

He can't bring himself to full on say that he wants them to be exclusive right away, got way too cocky about being the best sex she ever had and thus made her mad, assumed they'd break up after the first fight, nearly gave himself a heart-attack when he accidentally said "I love you", proposed to her because he wanted them to be on good terms after a fight but didn't know how to fix things without her guiding him, pretended to storm out in Vegas with an empty bag because he just wanted to be dramatic after a fight, and he almost didn't show up at their wedding.

The fact that the writers allowed to still have flaws, took the time to have him overcome said flaws and without being judgemental of him, like Monica was wasting her time with a total loser, is one of the reasons why his character development worked so well, and why I'll defend even the worst seasons of the show.

More importantly, despite the fact Monica is the one with the more experience on how to actually have a relationship, they also let Chandler be the one be the mature one every now and again, and talk sense into her when she's being unreasonable (like when she wanted to spend ALL the money he had saved for their future on their wedding alone).

I also really like how they have HIM taking the lead in some major events for their relationship, showing not just that he cares, but that he really is growing as a character and becoming more comfortable with being an equal in the relationship, instead of just needing Monica to guide/push him or just agreeing whenever she wants to takes things to the next level.

He is the one that decides they're still in "London time", the one to first say "I love you" (twice), the one to propose in Vegas and then start the conversation about whether they should really get married once they both think it over and are afraid they're rushing into it, the one to decide it's time for them to move in together, the one to propose for real (only took the writers five fucking tries to realize "Damn, maybe they SHOULD get married"), and while Monica says she wants a baby, she does it as a joke and it's Chandler who then brings up the subject seriously.

That last one also brings us one of the sweetest, saddest moments in the entire show. Them discovering they can't have kids, and Chandler making that whole speech to the mother of the baby they want to adopt that, when the time comes, he'll figure out how to be a dad, but Monica is already a mother - without a baby.

It just showed how much he loved her and how great of a partner he was, and it was FAR from being the one time in which they remain an loveable, interesting couple to watch post-marriage (seriously, it's crazy how Friends was THE show to get both a dramatic mess of a couple that can never reconciliate until the finale AND a stable couple that is just allowed to be happy together).

Chandler getting a look at what his life would be like if Monica left him when his boss is dragging him into his mid-life crisis. Monica being all excited to show him her new boots AND allow to actually guess what's changed about her look instead of doing the obligatory sitcom thing of "Wife gets mad at the husband for petty shit", and then Chandler carrying her on his back because said boots hurt her feet (then saying the other pair she wants to buy will cost her one husband, which always cracks me up). Chandler having to move to Tulsa because of his job, them missing each other like crazy, Chandler remaining faithful when another woman makes a move on him and quitting his job because he just wants to be with his wife, who is then super supportive of him when he's unsure of what to do in his professional life from then on - which of course, leads to this great joke.

M: I want you to have a job that you love, not statistical analysis and data reconfiguration. C: I quit and you learn what I do?

(And in case anyone is wondering, yes, I had to google what his job was because I forgot too)

They're simply an incredible couple that I would gladly watch doing the dishes together, and their relationship being so well-written was one of the best things that could have happened to Chandler's characterization because the show deconstructed and evolved it without betraying the core of who Chandler Bing was.

Also their romance led to the iconic episode of everyone finding out and messing with each other about it, and thus the scene of him and Phoebe trying to "seduce each other." I want to find the genius who wrote that scene in particular and send them a thank you card because it was the best thing in the whole world and I'll cherish it forever.

Matthew Perry, The Absolute Legend

Naturally, I have to end this post by remembering the guy that brought this amazing character to life.

Like I said before, he was always aware of the camera and making sure even the smallest reaction was funny for the audience. Like the other main actors, his charisma made good scenes great, and bad/mediocre scenes enjoyable - and whenever the script gave him something truly excellent to work with, he'd do it perfectly and make it all the more special.

He also stopped the writers from commiting THE biggest mistake they could have ever made: In the season 5 finale, after discovering Monica had lunch with her ex, he was supposed to cheat on her in Vegas, basically copying the Ross and Rachel break up drama of season 3. The actor asked them to change the script because he felt it would make everyone hate his character, sparing the audience of more unecessary drama and giving us the super cute almost-wedding in Vegas, that they chicken out of like two dorks, and then leads to them moving in together.

Matthew Perry was gave this role everything he had, even while going through really dark times, and in doing so he made millions of fans happy all over the world - and he'll be dearly missed.

#asks #chandler bing #mondler #chandler x monica #matthew perry

[rongzhi]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers!

tagged by @extraordinarilyextreme 🕺🏻

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 86… wow! 61 of them are from the past 3 years (2020-2023) and then the other 25 span from (2011-2019) (would not recommend)

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 827,446!

3. What fandoms do you write for? Right now I’m writing mainly for Oz and 成化十四年 (if you count a very slooooow moving WIP). Other fandoms: X-Men comics, Hamlet, Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead, HxH, Need for Speed, Avengers, 狂飙, TWD, and Nikita (lol). I have also written for a couple fandoms that I left behind in my ffnet days/orphaned works for on ao3.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

We Who Have The Souls (part 3 of a series) - HxH - Hisoka/Illumi Zoldyck (681 kudos)

The Horror Not To Be Surveyed (part 1 of a series) - HxH - Hisoka/Illumi Zoldyck (660 kudos）

Amethyst Remembrance (part 2 of a series) - HxH - Illumi Zoldyck & Killua Zoldyck (483 kudos)

Suppositions - The Walking Dead - Daryl Dixon/Glenn (444 kudos)

Ash is Purest White - 成化十四年 - Ding Rong/Wang Zhi (179 kudos)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Once I actually started participating in fandom, I realised that this was something people strive to do, so I try to respond more now as well. Previously I did not respond to comments because I didn’t like how Ao3 counts author comments in the number of comments/reviews a fic had. I used to want to know exactly how many other people commented on my fic, probably because I got so few comments lol, and then it was just a habit not to reply. I try harder to reply now because I also like it when authors reply to my comments :)

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? LOL major character death fic, When Tomorrow Comes, EASILY. I legit cried while cooking when I was making dinner during the time that I was writing this. The masochism was real but the sadism was realer (making the group chat reap what they sowed lol)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Hm! I have a couple that are rather fluffy but I would say the harder the rain, honey, the sweeter the sun (yeah yeah... hozier lyric title. sue me). They get married~

8. Do you get hate on fics? I tend to write small ships and rarepairs, so I think that’s sort of impossible tbh. I did get flamed a couple of times on ffnet back in those days, but... the joke was on the ppl flaming me, probably. You were expecting greatness from a 12 year old.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I write really cringe explicit scenes (not on purpose... that’s just how they turn out imo) but I've nver written pwp or anything.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? We shan’t speak of it and you’ll never find it, either.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I know of… again, I don’t really write stuff that gets on anyone’s radar, I don’t think.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes! I have had 5 fics translated into Russian and one translated into Chinese! <3

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? The crossover that shall not be named.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship? I know my url is literally rongzhi but believe me when I say I don't have one lol

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? (puts head in my hands) I don’t want to way I won’t finish things but I have multiple rongzhi wips still on the back burner (I’m committed to finishing at least ONE of them for sure)… Ugh, but of the fics I've already started posting, I doubt I’ll ever finish The Nineteenth Year of Chenghua or after the autumn breeze. Sadly, I was a little too ambitious about starting both multi-chapter fics. I’m more broken up about the former though, because it is EXACTLY my cup of tea… as a reader! Lol. I don't know... Maybe... I have bits and pieces written but 🙄

16. What are your writing strengths? I wanna say uhhhh dialogue?? According to trusted sources (much screaming and cursing), I have also been known to write some pretty devastating angst!

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Description for sure… Plot… sometimes, if there is one… Probably not the best…

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? I'll write other languages into the dialogue of a fic if it's in character/appropriate. I don't see any issue in that—only issue is for ME... if I don't speak the language, I have to research how to make it not sound too machine translated, because I know how silly that will come across to native/fluent speakers if they read it. Even for my cfandom fics, there are some words like honorifics that I just romanise because I don't like to translate them to whatever the eng subs say.

19. First fandom you wrote for? I wrote Harry Potter fanfic in third grade before I knew what fanfic was, I guess. And then I wrote Harry Potter x Twilight fanfic in middle school once I did ... No, I do not come from noble beginnings... No, the HPxTwi crossovers are not the one that shall not be named. I also wrote a lot of X-men (comics) fanfic before I knew what fic was!

20. Favorite fic you've written? HMMM… Kind of partial to Bolt From The Blue (Is it bc Susu has gassed me up about it so much? Who can say?) (jk, I am very proud of that one and I did enjoy write it a lot!). More recently, I really like writing In the Blink of an Eye, just because it was in 2nd person which I haven’t written since my Homestuck days (you’ll never find those fics either). It was just fun to write!

tagging: @eatprayworm @annadream @merelyafigment @tocadoguara @qinzai @catholicjigglypuff @inrainprose and anyone else who wants to do this! Consider yourself tagged!

#text #long post #and for anyone wondering i have actually NOT been at home these past couple of days... hence no douyin translations! #the old laptop i took with me is just too fucking tiny for me to bother trying to subtitle shit on 😅

[wetcatspellcaster]

very kindly tagged by @cursedhaglette, thank you for giving me a chance to talk about my writing :)

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

11! :)

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

lmfao. 985,659. That's nearly ten thesises (theses?) in the time of my PhD programme, so I'm going to just go quickly walk into the sea.

3) What fandoms do you write for?

the majority of my fic is for videogames with love interests and OC potential (BG3, Dragon Age) but I did briefly fall prey to the darklina disease, which I have to admit to here in order to answer some of the other questions

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1- Pieces Still Stuck in Your Teeth (bg3)

2- Party Favours (bg3)

3- A Bleeding Heart (bg3)

4- The Stars Don't Shine, They Burn (shadow and bone)

5- An Honest Lie (bg3)

5) Do you respond to comments?

as best as I can, I typically clear out a previous chapter just before I post something new (so that's one way to monitor or predict my posting activity lmfao)

6) What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Lmao. Sunblindness (shadow and bone) which takes an 'eye for an eye' approach to an amnesia AU. I actually wanted to end on a major character death but my pal's response was "jesus Emma, this is something people read for fun" so I watered it down :')))))

7) What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Party Favours currently!! Happier endings incoming, IMO.

8) Do you get hate on fics?

yes, occasionally, I'm still in single digits thankfully. i always find it so funny bc nobody is more critical of my fic than me. you think you can hurt me? babygirl, we're in the 5th dimension of insults in my brain, your surface level comment barely touches the sides.

9) Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

nope! call me the Astarion!spawn ending, the way I fade-to-black :')))))

10) Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I crossovered Stardust and Shadow and Bone, but it was not a straight crossover it was more a chewed up, swallowed, and digested version of both premises. I similarly wrote a Wintersmith/Shadow and Bone crossover that I never posted bc the sickness left me.

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

lol. lmfao, even. :)))))

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have had requests made of me and given permission for that to happen, but I do not know if it was ever posted!

13) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

no, it's not for me unfortunately, I was that horrible kid in group projects who just wished she could work alone :')))))))))))

14) What’s your all time favorite ship?

honestly there are many but the two that are indelibly written on my soul are Howl/Sophie and Spike/Buffy like the simple bitch I am.

In terms of things I've written? zevran/surana, hands down.

15) What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Anything I post I will eventually finish, out of social anxiety alone. At the moment I'm worried about the stuff sitting unposted in gdocs.

16) What are your writing strengths?

hahahahahahaha i don't fucking know i think i can make character voices distinct so you can usually tell which POV I'm writing from once the perspectives are established?

I have been complimented on my dialogue.

I think I'm usually brave enough to take a risky decision, even if it doesn't pay off. These decisions also land more than they used to so it's a skill I've built with time and one I am proud of.

My jokes don't seem to just be for me anymore, I like it when other people say I made them laugh.

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

If there's something that can be said straightforwardly in a sentence, you know I'll say it in three paragraphs instead. I wouldn't be surprised if people think I'm a purple-prosed motherfucker.

Smut and lack thereof

the repeat of 'conversation, stage direction, eye contact, expression, repeat' is not a weakness but it is something I become intermittently self conscious of.

18) Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I am a fan of it and I appreciate it when its done well (pour one out for Naomi Novik's fic/writing where the language work is cringingly poor), but not something I can personally do. Admirer in others, of the skills I lack.

19) First fandom you wrote for?

*dabs* Dragon Age, the OG. It was the pandemic, and I didn't want to replay Wicked Eyes Wicked Hearts bc I hate timed sections, so I wrote a fic instead.

20) Favorite fic you’ve written?

I feel bad writing this on the blog that's currently 99% BG3, but The Stars Don't Shine They Burn. It was my first time plotting something that diverged greatly from source material, and I was going through some stuff at the time that I can feel viscerally when I return to it and read the words. It is a work of personalised comfort. There's one scene in it that still gets me, every single time.

I don't know, it's funny to see Pieces get attention and I'm very, very proud of Pieces, but some of what I'm thinking through in that was in its proto-form in the other fic, which is finished and I'm really proud of it... so let's see if anything comes along to bop it off the top spot once I have a critical distance and am not in the writing trenches lol.

Tagging wise, I actually want to do an open call on this one!! this was a really pleasant exercise, so anyone seeing this who wants to talk about their writing or celebrate their achievements can take this as my personal invitation :)

scared? do it anyway x

#tags #tag games #my writing #personal tag

[abstractredd]

AO3 Twenty Questions

1. how many works do you have on ao3? 17 wowzers

2. what’s your total ao3 word count? 269,878. (but honestly that’s not super updated because oMaM is like… twice as long as what i have published on there lol. this also doesn’t include my older fics from Fanfiction.net and Wattpad which would easily give me another 150k)

3. what fandoms do you write for? mainly elder scrolls at the moment

4. what are your top five fics by kudos? (oh lord the bnha fics SHAKSJD)

5. do you respond to comments? i try to, always! i don’t think there’s many i haven’t responded to and if i haven’t it’s usually because it’s a friend of mine and i’ve already messaged them here or on discord LOL

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending not any of them really?? i’m a Happily Ever After kinda person. i mean i have one fic that’s a scene rewrite from Your Lie in April but it doesn’t actually change the canon outcome of the show which if you’ve seen it you’ll know it’s pretty “angsty” but i feel like that doesn’t count because i didn’t write that yknow

7. what’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? as previously established i’m a big fan of HEAs. literally all of them lol. although bad habit certainly has a pretty cheesy ending

8. do you get hate on fics? i have but that was way before my ao3 days. i honestly can’t recall if any of my ao3 fics have gotten hate? people are pretty chill on there in my experience. Fanfiction.net is a whole other animal though

9. do you write smut? if so what kind? oh absolutely. i’m a sexually active adult and i tend to both read and write about sexually active adults so i feel like there’s really no surprise there

10. do you write crossovers? what’s the craziest one you’ve written? i have before but i’m not really a fan of them now, reading or writing. i wrote a superwholock fic in like, 2016, and that’s about it hahaha

11. have you ever had a fic stolen? no? is that a thing that happens?

12. have you ever had a fic translated? not on ao3 but one of my fics got translated to Italian by a fan on Wattpad once that was pretty cool

13. have you ever co-written a fic? yessir! me and my sibling in hadlof @plutoprophecy / @midnightfangz wrote one together: here

14. what’s your all time favorite ship? my OTP you mean. cmon let’s call it what it is. it’s patrochilles btw

15. what’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Go to Bed Dumbass. i stated writing it when i wasn’t in a good place mentally and i can’t even look back on it without getting bad memories. also i just had no idea where i was going with the plot. and i’m not in the bnha fandom anymore lol. i hate having unfinished fics on my page and have literally gone back to update years-old fics before but not this one.

16. what are your writing strengths? i like to think my prose is complicated enough to sound professional but not so over the top that my writing isn’t easily digestible. i feel like i can write dialogue pretty well too

17. what are your writing weaknesses? i feel like i have a problem with repeating myself lol. like i use the same conjunctions a lot. and i struggle with action/fight sequences but i feel like i’m getting better at those the more i write them (i didn’t write them at all really until i started writing TES fics)

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? i mean. i feel like this is so situational. if the dialogue is crucial to the plot and it’s going to be a chore to make the average reader look up what it is? i don’t really care for it. but if it’s something off handed that doesn’t really change the plot or is more of a funny joke that a reader can get by either A) happening to speak the language or B) going out of their way to look it up and in that situation it’s more of a fun little bonus and not needed for them to understand the story beat that it’s a part of.

19. first fandom you wrote for? one piece. in 2013. lol

20. favorite fic you’ve written? i really really like somewhere the light won’t reach us. it’s a character study of a TES oc so it’s honestly closer to an original work than it is a fanfiction but i think it turned out really nice. i also think liebesfreud is a really good story and i'm in the process of making it into an original novel (with different character names obv)

not tagging anyone cuz im lazy but if you wanna do this go for it weeee

#redd writes #shutupberri #writeblr #ao3 author

[sinni-ok-sessi]

Fic writer interview

Tagged by @bitterflames, thank you!

How many works do you have on AO3? 21, a number that surprises me every time by being both more and fewer than I think it should be

What’s your total AO3 word count? 186, 378 (again, feels like this is both way too many words and also not as many as it ought to be)

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Moonlight as My Guide (The Untamed) The Naming of Small Things (The Untamed) Continuing Professional Development (The Magnus Archives) Noli me tangere (The Magnus Archives) Spin Me Right Round (The Untamed)

Nothing suprising here, given the ridiculous size of those two fandoms, but I am always charmed by the love CPD gets, given it's mostly me making jokes about a librarianship conference I went to once

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Aaaagh, I wish I did? I'm bad at thinking of things to say! I think I do better at responding in small fandoms where I know/know of most of the commenters and 'thank you for being on this small liferaft with me' feels like an appropriate sentiment

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? I don't really do angst-angst, but The Winding Roads They Led Me Here is probably the most obviously not-a-happy-ending thing I've written?

What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending? I am surveying my corpus and learning that wow, I write a not inconsiderable number of things about learning to live when you don't really want to? Shan't be analysing that too closely, tyvm, but I do remain pleased with the way And Green the Ground Below and Breathe In For Luck came out. For sheer straightforward glee at the ending, it's gotta be never knew a part of you / you didn't set in ink

Do you write crossovers? No, I imagine crossovers at great length and then make no moves towards writing anything down (see: the sprawling Nirvana in Fire/Vorkosigan series Entity that gets passed around between me and several friends, which consists entirely of one of us going 'hey have you thought about if X met Y?' and then yelling about that for several hours straight)

Have you ever received hate on a fic? lol, only from the one person who told me 'toxic xiyao' was ruining MaMG, which is very funny to me because that's kind of the point in that fic

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? yeahhhh but I find it very difficult. A long, hard process, in fact. As for 'what kind', uh, mutually obsessive D/s dynamics pretty much covers it, I think

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge

Have you ever had a fic translated? Yeah! Someone on Wattpad was translating MaMG into Spanish, though idk how far they got

Have you ever co-written a fic before? No because I am very secretive about showing people my writing until it's 'presentable' and I think that would kill me

What’s your all-time favorite ship? [Douglas Richardson voice] Sir is fickle and changeable [/Douglas Richardson voice], but I think the ship I have spent longest actively contemplating is proooobably MCS/Jingyan?

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? All of themmmmmmm. (No, I would really like to do more with the Langya Hall prequel fic, but I think it's currently beyond my confidence as a writer so...)

What are your writing strengths? Fraught conversations and minute observations of body language, my beloved

What are your writing weaknesses? Plot? I don't know her. Pacing? A distant acquaintance at best

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? I doubt I ever would, because I'm not confident in the spoken forms of any language I quote-unquote 'know', and I also find the 'multilingual character uses non-English endearments for their beloved' trope to be...a little painful, but I'm not averse to the idea on principle, though I suspect it requires more skill than people generally think to pull it off well

What was the first fandom you wrote for? hhhhh fucking. Sherlock Holmes (ACD stories), I think. Maybe the Psmith books by PG Wodehouse? I think it's for the best that the fic I wrote as a teen is marooned somewhere on LJ

What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to? I'm not going to do it, because it involves way too much compartmentalising not to set off my RPF squick, but god those sad boat men from The Terror are compelling and would bring me nicely back into my wheelhouse of repressed Victorians and also the Navy (I think I never actually finished writing anything for the Hornblower fandom back in the day, but my god it was not for lack of trying)

What’s your favorite fic you’ve written? usually my most recent fic tbh (in this case, Make A Mercy Out of Me, which is, uh, unrepentant Disguiser smut and therefore of interest to like. three people worldwide, but that's fine)

tagging: @tallangrycockatiel, @goingsparebutwithprecision and anyone else who's interested and hasn't already been tagged

#tag games #writing about writing

[lynne-monstr]

Fic author interview! I was tagged by the fantastic @glorious-spoon. thanks, this was so fun!!

No-pressure tagging: @afincf-tirwer @shadaras @undead-robins @tka-trashfire @hils79, @nyelung, @vampirenaomi, @prince-of-elsinore

How many works do you have on AO3?

As of yesterday, 202!

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

678,560 words. which i have mixed feelings about because. i'm proud i've managed to write so much but at the same time, i've been at this for over 10 years i wish the number was higher for all that time.

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Things Best Kept Between Three People (Leverage, Eliot/Parker/Hardison) - 1,389 kudos

Escalation of Commitment - (Leverage, Eliot/Parker/Hardison) - 1,360 kudos

I say goodbye but mean hello - (Leverage, Eliot/Parker/Hardison) - 1,283 kudos

This is the Place Where I Sit - (Leverage, Eliot/Parker/Hardison) - 1,006 kudos

In Possession Of - (Leverage/Supernatural crossover) - 715 kudos

looking at these fics, it's very obvious that another way of asking this question is: "what's the most popular ship you've written." though i am very amused that an actual crossover made the top 5, considering how deeply those have fallen out of favor in the past twenty years.

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try my best! some years i am better at it than other. but even if i'm in a low energy moment, i appreciate every single comment <3

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

The leverage theme continues, apparently.

Just One Last Time (Leverage with Highlander elements. Eliot is immortal. Parker and Hardison are not).

I'm not usually a sad ending person but every one in a while I indulge.

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

Basically all of them lol. But I guess I'll say that ghost story fic because it got really sad before the happy ending.

This is not a ghost story (The King's Avatar, yuhuang, magical realism)

7. Do you write crossovers?

Yes! They are my original fandom love and such a wonderful self-indulgence. I should try to write more of them in 2024.

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not on a fic, but I got plenty for my silly ramblings back in the shadowhunters fandom, sadly.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes! yay smut. I prefer mine with some kind of kink in order to hold my interest. (not that i don't enjoy non-kinky smut but when i do i tend to enjoy it for the emotional payoff rather than the sex itself)

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I am aware of.

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! How cool is that!? Love fandom translators and the amazing work they do <3

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No. I don't think co-writing is a thing that I would enjoy. Trying to merge my writing style with someone else sounds stressful and also i think i might be too much of a control freak for that kind of collab.

13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Whatever my ship of the moment is!

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

I'm pleased that all my big recent wips have been finished! I've been working on a little "troubling rain is cursed" fic for a couple years now. it's only a few thousand words long so not sure it qualifies for wip status, but i would like to finish it so I can post it!

15. What are your writing strengths?

I think characterization and silly jokes.

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

Description. Despite my efforts I will never be one of those beautiful prose writers.

I think of my style as very "what you see is what you get" and I consider that to be both a strength and a weakness.

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

It's a hard no almost 100% of the time. And something I will likely use the back-button on.

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

My first posted fic was hetalia (germancest) and I had such a wonderful time in that fandom!

19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?

Still really want to try and wrangle my onmyoji ot3 ficlet thing.

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written

That question is cheating! But I'll go with my de-aged ywz fic because I never thought I could write a story over 10k words and I'm still very proud that I managed something nearly 70k!

Means of Transportation (The King's Avatar, yuhuang, de-aged ywz)

#meme things #oh no it's me #what a fun thing to think about. yay writing!

[sappho-of-space]

20 Questions Writer Meme:

I was nominated by the lovely @ashilrak to participate in this. Answering the these questions was a fun- a little walk down memory lane and a reminder of how much I've grown.

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

47!

2. What's your total ao3 word count?

189419

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Mostly Percy Jackson at the moment! I've written snippets for The Magnus Archives and Danny Phantom. I've also contemplated writing for Marvel for a while.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

1. A God in Chains (3151)

2. At the Armrest of a God (3149)

3. we both have bad taste in men, but at least we have each other (2073)

4. cookies aren't the only hot thing here (1713)

5. you and i until eternity (1705)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Complicated answer. I did in the past until I dealt with some harrassment/negativity with a previous fandom. It scared me away from interacting with any that I didn't really know on my own fics. I've found a lovely new community, so I'm trying to respond to comments more to show everyone how much I appreciate them.

6. What's the fic you wrote that has the angstiest ending?

I actually had to skim a few of my fics to remember their endings, lol. My answer is probably:

another flower in a garden of tragedies

Or

Of New Blood and Old Hyacinths

7. What's the fic you wrote that has the happiest ending?

I've written a lot of fluff with happy endings, so I'll just answer this with the fic with my favorite ending.

"we both have bad taste in men, but at least we have each other" is a win for the lesbians and was just so much fun to write. I've gotten a lot of requests for a continuation of it, and I've had some ideas, but nothing enough to put to paper.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Lmao, yes. I've orphaned about 7 fics from a previous fandom because of the toxicity of the fandom (My Hero Academia). It was everything from demanding updates to trying to 'cancel' me for no reason but because they didn't like how I portrayed a character. On my most recent fics, there hasn't been much overtly negative- just jokes/comments that don't land well. Overall, I'm happy with my new community.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes, lmao. I write hedonistic shit that would make even the most stone cold nun blush. Looking through my fics makes me realize I really enjoy temple/altar defilement.

10. Do you write crossovers?

None yet, but I'm not opposed! I enjoy reading them when they tick all of my boxes, but I will admit, I can be pretty picky.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

None that I know of, but I wouldn't be surprised.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! Just one. I thought it was very sweet and adored the fact that someone liked my writing enough to spend time translating it.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Just one, but I'm very open to doing more! I've written in a rouns robin, but I think I would prefer doing a full co-write with one or two other authors.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Very hard, but probably spideypool. I've had a Spider-Man fixation for about half my life, and I simply love Deadpool. Besides spideypool, probably perpollo or jonmartin.

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but don't think you ever will?

I don't think I have one? I have 4 wips currently. One has an ending well in sight. Another has 15k words already, and I refuse to let all that go to waste.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Descriptions and pacing! I've been told a few times that people enjoy reading my au's because I don't infodump all at once, I make the gathering of information feel natural and comfortable. I personally love my visual metaphors.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Time management. I'm generally very busy and get easily distracted. Getting myself to sit down and actually write is a pain.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I try to write around using another language if I don't know a native speaker who could help me. Writing in German would be no problem for me (I studied it in college), but I would shy away from anything else.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Attack on Titan (I was in 8th grade, lol). I published it on Wattpad, and it did fairly well before I deleted it.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

This is almost impossible to answer, but I loved writing "And Spring Will Come Again." It was for a fic exchange that I pinch hitted for. I went a bit overboard with the nature imagery and metaohors, but I had fun researching folklore + mythology. Anything that requires research is very fun to me.

I, sappho-of-space, hereby nominate @celestialepiphany .

#text #tagging game #fanfic #my writing #perpollo #percy jackson #this was a lot of fun

[spacevixenmusic]

Unfairly Maligned Games, Vol. 1

Games I loved that got low scores, review bombed, or have some other weird negative stigma attached to them that I think is unfairly earned.

NOTE: I don't believe in giving games a number score or a letter grade. Maybe I'm just bad at criticism or very easy to please, whatever.

Battleborn [2016]

One of my personal favorite games of all time, Battleborn was advertised as a hero-based PVP shooter with MOBA mechanics that unfortunately came out right alongside one of the biggest games of the PVP shooter genre ever released (Overwatch). Thanks to this poor timing, Battleborn - along with several other similar but different games - was doomed to failure, choked to death by Blizzard's infinite marketing resources and predatory Free Play Weekends that just mysteriously happened to occur on the same weekends as its "competitors" major updates, DLC releases, promo events, etc. Battleborn is no longer available to play ANYWHERE as of January 2021; so few people played it after it was review bombed as "the game your mom bought you when you asked for Ovewatch for xmas" (yes Blizz fans used that fucking Simpsons meme TO DEATH, it's their one joke they have about Battleborn) that the game's servers had to be shuttered so the money could be funneled into Gearbox's much bigger cash cow release at the time, Borderlands 3.

Sour grapes aside, Battleborn was in many ways the game that many people actually wish Overwatch was now. In addition to the PVP game, Battleborn had a co-op campaign mode - complete with a story, cutscenes, and unique character dialogue depending on who you brought to each mission - which could be played for character XP (ability tree unlocks), random gear loot (for use in either campaign mode or PVP), and character cosmetics. The 30 playable characters were wildly varied in terms of design and gameplay, and yes I have to point it out every time, Battleborn had both "cute tiny animal in a mech suit" and playable black women BEFORE Overwatch did. The game also featured a very impressive and highly slept-on visual aesthetic that felt like every Saturday Morning Cartoon I ever grew up with from the 80s/90s, featuring a wild blend of 3D and 2D animation that all the other hero PVP games WISH they could have matched.

And damn, dude. If you like Lore in your video games, there was a TON of material written for this one. And I'm not just talking about supplemental media like a comic or a wiki or an interview about cut content or whatever. I mean there was a metric FUCK TON of additional world-building material right there in the game. Each character came with a set of challenges you could complete which would give you the usual XP and money, but also unlocked a fun little tidbit of Lore about the universe. These came in the form of short stories, recorded conversations, email logs, forum posts, shipping manifests, and even fully voiced segments explaining details about each character, who they were, why they were fighting this war, and some fun little ways of explaining how their weapons or abilities worked. For example, Reyna holds her laser pistol on its side, gangster-style, because she wanted to use a very specific gun model, had its internal parts stripped out so she could use an ammo clip of a much stronger caliber than that model was supposed to be capable of, but in order for the chamber to reload correctly, the gun had to sit a bit cockeyed. And that fun little nugget is just sitting there, right in the game, for you to discover! It's fucking cool as hell!

Now I know you're itching to make a joke about there only being like 15 people who even played the game. Yes, I've seen the Active Player Steam charts meme. It's true, Battleborn had a very small, but also very dedicated, community. Despite that, there were so few people playing that we all ended up making friends with each other pretty quickly. It was one of the friendliest PVP communities I'd ever been a part of. We knew there weren't many people online, so we created an environment that felt comfortable for players new and veteran alike. Many of us are still friends today, outside of the game. Because there were so few people online, we also got to play regularly with Gearbox devs and game writers, and even one of the voice actors responsible for at least three of the game's characters (plus a few NPCs!). We organized and hosted our own events, got official backing from the devs for Double XP weekends, held art jams and hashtag celebrations. Hell, I even used my love of this game to jumpstart my serious foray into music by making an entire album of songs for its characters (complete with a bunch of commissioned fan art from the community)!

(art by Leaddybum)

So yeah. Rest in peace, Battleborn. You were ahead of your time and the hate and harassment you got from The Gamers was completely undeserved. I will always keep hope alive that you'll come back to us some day. Maybe as a sequel, maybe in a new format. There was so much more left to explore in that universe.

May our battle never end.

#unfairly maligned games #battleborn #ask me about this game motherfucker #TALK TO ME ABOUT THIS GAME #I dare you to come at me cause I will preach my love of this game forever and a day #also it's 2023 and OVERWATCH STILL SUCKS SHIT #FUCK YOU BLIZZARD

[mangatxt]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by @creativenicocorner; thanks nico!!

tagging @kreauxlighe @tomezeme @mosshook @carriecmoney and anyone else who wants to do this. no pressure!

answers under the cut

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

23

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

489k. i want that half-million by year's end.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

currently, i only write mp100 fics. my ao3 has some older fics from hq!! and a couple other fandoms I used to write for.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

i'm not gonna list them out because they're all older stuff i'm less enthusiastic about recommending now. the top four are daisuga (hq!!) fics I wrote in college, and the fifth is an inukoko fic I wrote before tokrev ended.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to keep up with them. It means a lot to me when people take time out of their day to send me their thoughts, and I've made a lot of friends from it! But I get overwhelmed and behind on it sometimes, and then I'm like... I probably shouldn't respond to this until I post a new chapter. oops.

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

hands down, weekly consultation (mp100, gen, mcd).

second place goes to the one for the road (tr, kokoinu), which ends in a breakup.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

most of my fics have happy endings.

the parachute candidate (mp100, serirei) has a pretty happy ending. so do halo effect (mp100, serirei) and phototropic (mp100, gen).

but i think the happiest ending is probably the twelfth annual rising sun spiritual union holiday decoration contest (mp100, serirei), because reigen wins money instead of more time with roshuuto.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

i've been super lucky to have overwhelmingly positive reception to my fics. i didn't love all the foot commentary on that one tokrev fic, but it is what it is.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

i do. very serious smut only, like dick hanahaki and schrödinger's office smut and slow-motion trainwreck sex column

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

i wrote a short haikyuu!! x fullmetal alchemist fic for daisuga week a long time ago. that's probably the craziest one.

in medias res (mp100, gen) is the little match girl isekai, so that probably counts too. reigen literally crosses over.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not to my knowledge

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

a few offers, but i'm not sure if they were completed

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

i have been responsible for the prose output of all of my fics, but i've had a lot of help for various plots. for example, i feel that half the blame credit for bringing flora obscura into being should go to @crownorclover

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

serirei (mp100). it has two characters i adore individually, a setting with so much canonical room for shenanigans, and a lot of open-endedness to the development of the relationship that makes it fun to speculate over.

i'm still partial to kokoinu (tokrev) too. both kokoinu and serirei have that bodyguard/loyalty trope to them and are often written within a greater found family. it's good stuff.

i also like the inherent appalling messiness of reishuuto but it's not that serious

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

that novelist!hawks fic i started once. rip.

16. What are your writing strengths?

i like an off-the-wall premise, and i am incredibly committed to the bit.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

i tend to overwrite things. need to work on brevity.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

for the manga series i write for, i try to write in scanlation/fansub language for the most part. that's how i interacted with them originally, so that's how the character voices sound in my head. not everything in one language has a 1:1 translation into another.

mp100 has a lot of cultural/wordplay jokes that don't translate well into english. i have a lot of wordplay in my fics to match the tone, but i've only managed to make a wordplay joke that translates both ways once. so much respect for translators who figure out how to make that work on a regular basis.

i try to do as much research as possible to get things right, but i know i'll make mistakes. for that reason, i really appreciate people who beta read for me, who put together writing resources and other research materials, or who are kind enough to leave constructive feedback.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

pokémon.

i can't find it anymore but at one point, my 12-year-old ass wrote a fic where gym leader chuck's wife is like "chuck you spend all your time with the waterfall. i want a divorce." laksjdlkasj

i'd totally write it again.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

the parachute candidate.

(i think i'll like sage advice a lot more when i finish it)

#ani.txt #fic updates #tag game #writing #thanks again for the tag nico - i am also definitely not procrastinating on nano

[ravnloft]

writer interview

tagged @bardic-inspo (*´▽`*) thank u my friend these are so fun

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

3 lol. eventually i'll post more. probably. maybe

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

100,989 (not counting the original "draft" of wicked turns because a lot of that got reused in the current version)

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

girl (gender neutral) i don't even have 5 fics total... top kudos though is wicked turns :')

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

yes!!!! comments are so nice and they let me know i am not posting into a void and that other people are actually interested in what i'm writing!!!! if you have ever left a comment on anything i wrote you have such a special place in my heart and you make me so happy!!!!!!!

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

haven't finished it yet but it's going to be drowning lessons :)

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

also have not finished it but everyone in how to win friends will come out SO happy and well-adjusted. it's at a good little stopping point for now and i might skip into act 2 for the next chapter/s... idk it doesn't really have a plot it's just me giving myself like. writer aftercare from the stuff in drowning lessons or wicked turns fjgdfjjfdgj

7. Do you write crossovers?

not anymore but if you know the ancient piri lore of when i did tumblr rp......... the harley quinn/norman bates "it started out as a joke and now we're really invested" ship still makes me go insane from time to time...... i have a type and it is unhinged men who fall for somehow even more unhinged women

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

nah

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yes. the kind where i get wine drunk or have an edible and then scream into my hands after typing each word because i hate writing smut but damn if it ain't relevant to the storyline

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

no but i HAVE had my peebles art stolen/reposted on at least one site

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

if you count tumblr rp as co-writing fic, then yes

13. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

ough. waugh. how can i choose between my beautiful children

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

yeah so i have. the loose outline of a peebs fic. and it has been rolling around in my brain for years and years and years. but in order to truly do it justice i feel like it would be a full-on multi-issue comic series and the last time i tried making a graphic novel-style work (shoutout to princess huntress, your worldbuilding lives on but i'll never finish you) i got maybe 8/100+ pages done and then spiraled into art burnout for like 4 years

15. What are your writing strengths?

i like to think i am good at writing horror and gore teehee <3

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

sex scenes...... i don't like writing it, i don't like publishing it, i am ehhhh about reading it, but again, damn if it ain't relevant to the storyline

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

don't trust google translate. just use <> or whatever if you don't know the language.

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

batman (stares wistfully out the window for 10 hours)

19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?

i REALLY want to write a skyrim long-ish fic. i have so many thoughts on it. there would be two LDBs (amma and sigg). both of them are cursed by daedra but in wildly different directions

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

wicked turns :)

#piri.txt

[mutxnts]

20 fic questions

tagged by @oodlyenough to do this!! thank you <33

1. how many works do you have on Ao3?

i have 22 works posted!

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

42,292 words! that actually really surprises me bc all of the things i write are one shots, and they aren't particularly long. i thought this number would be farrrrrr lower

3. what fandoms do you write for?

currently only ace attorney!

4. what are your top five fics by kudos?

a cold night in ikea (xmen) good old days (ace attorney) lost (xmen) sunsets over genosha (xmen) hot, sticky, sweet (ace attorney)

5. do you respond to comments?

yes!!!! i always make a point to respond :) i don’t really get that many comments on my fics so i always want to show some appreciation for the people that do take time to write something!!

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i guess lost? but the thing is i don't really like to write pure angst. most of the angst i write has a happy ending so by definition, that's probably the only fic i've written that has an angsty ending

7. what’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

hmm see this is difficult when most of my fics have a happy ending and i think it's a little subjective which one is the happiest. but maybe sweet, sweet bliss since it's basically just pure fluff?

8. do you get hate on fics?

thankfully not, although i did get a slightly weird comment a couple months ago that i THINK was trying to jokingly tease me about how the characters were being ooc bc phoenix never gave edgeworth a blowjob in the games. and then they ended the comment with “but good job writing a story.” the problem is i did not know the person and so it did not really feel like much of a joke and it just. idk it felt very weird so i ended up deleting it

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

i only recently started posting smut. i still feel a little awkward about it bc both times it’s been pwp, and with that it’s just like. yeah here’s two guys fucking. that’s it. but maybe that’s just the ace in me talking and feeling kinda weird about it gjsjfjdjfjdf

10. do you write crossovers? what’s the craziest one you’ve written?

normally no i do not, but i started talking about which pokemon some of the ace attorney characters would have with a friend. and from there we started talking about so many headcanons that i started writing something for that universe bc i was inspired, but i honestly haven't touched it in a few months bc i got distracted writing other things lol

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i’m aware of, so hopefully never!

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

yes!!!! again this goes back to my fics i wrote as a kid (so back when i was still on wattpad), but a few people translated my fics into other languages. the only one i can remember specifically was it was translated into turkish, but i remember there being other ones as well

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

i have not! and i think that’s just bc i write roleplays with people instead

14. what’s your all time favorite ship?

either cherik or narumitsu <3

15. what’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

probably the one i ended up posting anyway since i feel like i'll never come back to it skdfjgjsdfgkj

16. what are your writing strengths?

i think i’m a pretty concise writer, since i write how i think most people would speak. if that makes sense? my answer in the next question kinda gets into that, but i think i’m just not really someone who goes super artistic with my writing

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

i think i’m not the best at writing prose. like, i’m not great with using very flowery, poetic kinda language or vocabulary. i struggle with that a lot. also, i can’t really write long fics, or even multi chapter fics. i just do not have the energy or motivation to do either one lol so that’s why all my fics are one shots

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i try to do it as little as possible bc i only know english, so i have to turn to google translate. and even then i try to stick to only pet names and other terms of endearment, so it’s not like i’m even really writing full sentences or anything in another language

19. first fandom you wrote for?

percy jackson!

20. favorite fic you’ve written?

honestly it's so hard to choose but maybe blinding lights! i'm pretty sure it was the most excited i've ever been to write a fic, but i also recall really enjoying the setting of a cold night in ikea and being able to write that :) that one was the first time i had written fan fic since i was in high school, and it made me fall in love with writing again

tagging @japanifornication @sevenyeargap @ivy-saurs and anyone else that wants to do this! though no worries if you don't want to :)

#ash writes #fic meme

[squid-ink-symphony]

Why YOU should vote for Shiver!

I know, i know. You are probably already decided on Frye or Big Man for this Splatfest. I don't blame you. All the members of Deep Cut are deeply loveable and would all make equally useless leaders. But i'm going to try and convince any of you that might be on the fence. And of course this is just for fun. I wish the best of luck to all three teams! I love all members of Deep Cut near equally and if this were a popularity contest i would be STRUGGLING. But luckily we have a concrete question to answer here!

Reason One:

She already sort of is the leader? She opens and closes the Anarchy Splatcast, is the one to announce Splatfests, and seems to be the one setting the tone for most of their broadcasts. So in a way you could argue she is already naturally fulfilling the role of a leader in Deep Cut. She serves as a stable(ish) point that both Big Man and Frye can bounce off of for conversations and jokes. In story mode you could argue Frye is more of a leader, but when it comes to the Splatcast Shiver is leading. So, the fact that Shiver DOESN'T step in and try to be in the spotlight and lets Frye take the lead shows that she knows how to let others be in charge when they are better suited to be.

Reason Two:

She has the least cons when it comes to her being in charge. This is a bit of a personal preference, but to me she seems like she has the least flaws when it comes to specifically leadership qualities. (She is still.... quite flawed...) Let's face it. Big Man is too much of a softie to be a leader. He would be VERY easily swayed by others. This is evident in his dialogue during his story mode rematch. "Ayy... (Still not a big fan of fighting, but...) Aaay! (The other two will yell at me if I run away!)" <direct quote from him. He is already easily pushed around by both Shiver and Frye. Figuratively AND literally when you take this line into account: “Ay? (Is that why you elbowed me aside when we were in line for ice cream?)” So he wouldn't even really be a leader in the end, more like a figurehead. Frye or Shiver could easily get him to do anything they wanted. Do i think they would seriously force him to do something he absolutely doesn't want to? No. But it wouldn't be that hard to convince him. He likes making people happy. As for Fyre? She's very indecisive. It's shown time and time again when she debates what splatfest team to pick, often changing her mind multiple times. She is also very spontaneous and likes to change plans up quickly. This can be helpful, but i think it would just end up with Deep Cut not having a concrete plan and instead bouncing around from project to project.

Reason 3:

inkipedia lowkey agrees with me. Ok, ok, ok. I know this is a stupid point. But all of this is quite silly already. But check out this quote from the wiki:

"Still, she appears to be the most mature member of Deep Cut, often remaining pragmatic, and composed, opposite of Frye and Big Man who tend to be more bold than Shiver. This maturity makes her a sort of leader of Deep Cut, in charge of opening and closing every Anarchy Splatcast and announcing important events like Splatfest themes and game updates."

See! At least the fans in charge of the wiki agree with me!

Reason 4:

She is the most mature. I know this is directly from the inkipedia quote above. But roll with me here. She is the most level headed and rational member of the trio. (which, admittedly, isn't saying much) But this means she can make good decisions and won't lead Deep Cut into too much trouble.

Reason 5:

It would be funny. A LOT of people are getting genuinely upset and toxic/rude about Shiver winning 4 splatfests. You know what would be funny? Making mean people even madder.

In conclusion... None of them are great choices. They do truy work better as co hosts instead of having one lead the other two. But when it comes down to it, Shiver is pretty much already leading Deep Cut. So having it be official wouldn't change their dynamic that much in the end.

Besides, we all know who should be the real leader of Deep Cut.... MARIE! I mean she is their boss.... right?

#splatoon #splatoon 3 #shiver vs frye vs big man #splatfest #shiver #frye #deep cut splatoon #big man splatoon

[frostbite-the-bat]

random thoughts (GETS LONG) but I've never developed what Mac Opsys and Frost would think of each other, considering that Frost was originally built by Brian (There was a 0.5 second of them not going after his neck)

They canonically (Like, our Frostbite Cogs Only canon) break reality and chill outside the game's bounds, like the game mechanics like that are canon for them which is also how HR got yeeted out (Being non canon breaking reality all that shit sadly I haven't read that dialogue in a bit + wasn't there for it) (Was asleep or at school)

And just that Mac like... Hacks and monitors stuff and is like The Tech Of The Toons

Like he absolutely knows Frost (and Spam by extension) are actually Cogs and he's probably even seen them being built and psobably has access to some of the files that were used to make them from Brian's computers

So Frost would absolutely be reported and be a known threat (They both are and aren't. They do legit harm and no good but also most of the time they're all bark no bite, it depends who you are) but for the sake of the funnies Frost does have Some Sort Of Plot Armor

But also, aside from me playing the game, in lore Frost basically never interacts with Toon Resistance stuff and the tasks and such anymore - they chill with their Toon friends and the Cogs and sort of just cause havoc as they do - they just do whatever they want really

Again at first they were scared, but realizing some Cogs know they're a Cog who was built to look like a Toon and don't attack them on sight for it - like they've got people behind their back and they sorta abuse that ajfjty

They stopped caring about hiding how they're a Cog and now to follow my current progress in the game just go raid the bosses for fun (though standing more on the side when going to a VP fight) and managers for a hang out or just... Argument or fight or whatever whenever I fight those. Otherwise they just stick with the Cogs and just... They're very very careless and everyone knows they're a Cog

Hell they LOVE attention and absolutely have a good bit of an ego and appearing on a whole show PROUDLY and SCARING TOONS PROUDLY literally ON PURPOSE making themselves known as like. A feared trickster just to boost their ego and confidence more

They're a little mother fucker but in a fun way because a lot of the times their attempts at Being Cool Or Menacing just Fucking Fail but they don't acknowledge it because That's Not Swag To Do.

So like clearly everyone knows but nobody has done anything yet shfhfjfj. I still gotta think if I ever do a more serious story with them or just... More concepts like that (still Toony silly tho) if they get affected by this more because they're just causing havoc with no restraint aside from them just. Failing often they're too overconfident and brash to be careful and just fuck things up goofily is what keeps them at bay

Though that isn't all there is to them - they still care about people and do know Rarely when to cool it down though even then they may joke (And possibly take it too far? One thing to know with Frost is to rarely take them seriously at a time like that, and just understand the sentiment they mean deep down) And often what they do they see as funny and one way they like making others around them happy is... Just by being an entertainer basically. Hell they're a co-host on a show

Basically Frost Is A Weirdo and THEY'RE VERY FUN and shouldn't be taken too seriously because them not being noticed by Toons is a big plot hole though I imagine some Toons just. Know. But they're just like. Okay they blow up buildings for fun and chase people and bite them (no serious injuries) but this is funny to watch. But also Toons do care about each other so they may to try and stop Frost sometime

I think the being gang piled on would just make them run off like OH THIS ISN'T THE END OF IT ALL... I'LL GET YOU. I'LL COME BACK. OHHHH and like go complain at sellbot hq and that's it (Though also many Toons are Scared because Frost Does Want People To Be Scared It's Funny For Them. BUT there's brave Toons out there!)

Another thing to be developed more is the family dynamic - it's very personal comfort based even if I do like thinking about the depth Cathal and Allan have and my thoughts about it... Some projection and oh GOD THAT OLD COMIC I NEVER FINISHED (glad I didn't some of my thoughts changed) but this stuff is a bit just... Disconnected from canon reality where things are a bit more idealized for funsies - like. Let's be honest Allan probably wouldn't adopt a toon cog his employee built because they're friends with his son and are helping him through his mental health and motivation issues. It'd take waayyy more time than it did in the story and no actual adoption would probably happen but then again there was never an actual adoption it was just. Being accepted into the family progressively. But like yeah still frost and spam don't even work normally for COGS INC - like they both work FOR employees of Cogs INC. LOOKS AT FROST'S GOOFY LIST OF JOBS

(Their main thing is working with High Roller as a show co-host plus some stage set up stuff and all that - Spam helps with it backstage. For Pace they do some of his paperwork Pace Place desk when they want to, but really they only took the job because their club leader is dating Graham + the club HQ is there. They also keep their closet of belongings there. They basically never actually do work there. Graham keeps them there because of Molly and because the two are highly competitive and wanna keep one upping each other in things. For Cosmo they work only so they don't have to pay off their massive tab. What they do is just go around and intimidate people into paying Cosmo. They call it being a hit man but all they do is just scare someone.)

So like?? It's again the fact that no matter what Frost is an absolute outlier. They look like a Toon, but have Cog insides. They're too toony for most Cogs, but too Coggy and mean for Toons. And that's honestly their whole character? They don't like rules and they like breaking them and doing whatever they want. That how they came to be - made to follow orders but they got corrupted and do the opposite. (Also one of the reasons why HR likes them, I imagine she's quite fascinated by Toons. He doesn't also like predictability and the more out there and fun and risky a thing is the more he likes it.

Frostbite at first glance is a Toon, and an extra wacky, loud and impulsive one at that - then you see it's a Cog and wonder how a Cog is just... This way. In a way them looking like a Toon and the show bringing both Toons and Cogs together is like. Almost symbolic. Of what? Who knows. Anyways HR saw Frost and thought 'I need to know more about whatever that is'.)

It's not a perfect story and again it cannot be taken too seriously and there's a lot of issues even I have with it but seeing as this is for fun and several things are there for comfort or just self indulgence it's just fine as it is like why bother with all detailed stuff when my result is just to goof off and have fun with scenarios with my friends? I can go into more serious detail whenever I decide to write something more serious, y'know ?

(Also side note ain't no way Allan accepting HIGH ROLLER into the extended family 😭😭😭😭😭) (Though Allan is the friendliest boss and HR is Marketable As Hell) (Chris can I borrow your employee 😭😭😭)

OK but again BACK TO WHERE WE STARTED. I need to see Mac Opsys and Frost dynamic someday there's a potential to be funny because on one hand Mac wants to stop stuff like this from happening he wants good for Toontown but also MUTUAL BRIAN BEEF

(Random thought, Frost always boasts about having many enemies but it's usually random on Le off Cogs and a few of the mgrs. Bostly Ben and Brian and like. Robert. In reality they're either friendly or neutral with most Cogs. They may be neutral but the other party doesn't like them as much, like with Thomas. Though a lot of these friendships are... Shallow and undeveloped and just there because they ARE a self insert and I'd like to be friends with certain characters. But no way in hell they'd get along with Misty oh my god they'd scare her probably. But also Frost isn't dumb and can see people who are distressed and as stated before they do tend to be calmer around like, Cathal and such.)

Anyways I love this freak random thoughts over I gotta go to bed

#Guzma's oc rambles #Frostbite

[stuckwith-harry]

“And under here, Hedwig”—Harry pulled open a door under the stairs—“is where I used to sleep; You never knew me then—Blimey, it’s small, I’d forgotten.... ”

#hpedit #harry potter #hjp #hp #dh #cw abuse for the following tags #so i've been thinking a lot lately about harry and the way he looks at / remembers his childhood #because i read somewhere that abused kids who've never known anything else don't necessarily realise just how bad their situation is #at least not while they're in it; (and that it serves as a coping mechanism then and afterwards - if it's not that bad; it can't hurt me) #and we've had these talks inside the fandom too; how matter-of-factly harry talks about the abuse he's suffered #both in dialogue with other people (like joking at the end of cos about how the dursleys would probably be disappointed he didn't die) #but also with the actual descriptions of things as they're happening; there's something almost /comical/ about the way #he describes things as a narrator; it's got this weird nonchalant ''so ya that happened'' vibe #and harry never had an actual confrontation with the dursleys #he never got to call them out and actually tell them ''what you did to me was beyond fucked up and this shit isn't okay'' #like; there wasn't this one incident where harry realises - let alone verbalises - ''i'm literally being abused'' #it happens yeah #and especially for older readers (by which in this case i mean everyone who's not a literal kid) #it's so obviously abuse #but it's never discussed in the books #hermione and ron notice the dursleys' behaviour is fucked up #but again #we don't get the confrontation that i think harry deserved #(actually that was one of the few things i liked about cursed child; it sort of talked about it; briefly; even if not well) #and that just leaves me wondering how that affects him as an adult #and how he /thinks/ about it #i've been developing some things in my post-war nicheverse recently where he gets confronted by that #mostly via ron - and then ginny and hermione - talking to him about it #and sort of comes to realise ''everything they did actually really fucking hurt me and it /still/ hurts because it's really really not okay #''

[wizkiddx]

hiii!!! omg please please pleasee do a part two of 3 hearts broken cus it fucking slaps miss girl

part 2 to 3 broken hearts!!! ive been so 🥺 at all the lovely comments+interest pt 1 had so thanku all !

summary: serious serious angst again will tom somehow get it back (unlike looking cos boy is a fool)

warnings: again lots of swearing (im British sorry not sorry) / wayyyy too much tea / slating Dom abit (obvs fictional but idk if I like the guy sorry his opinions are :/) / commitment issues

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

read part 1 here!!!!

That was three days ago now. Three days since you'd spoken to your boyfrien- well, Tom. It wasn't evident what the situation was.

The typical British weather brought with it the most ironic pathetic fallacy you could ever see. The clouds were dark and glooming, firing angry pellets of rain out as hard as they could. When you had pulled up on the roadside, it had just been a light drizzle but synchronised with your anxiety levels rising - so did the rain. When you finally opened up the car door, you threw your hoodie open with a sigh before running up the pathway to the front door.

It was the same burgundy red that you knew so well, but this time instead of just letting yourself in - you stood in the rain used the brass knocker thing twice. To be honest, you were hoping that no one was home - but in that house, it was pretty unlikely. After 30 seconds of getting drenched in the downpour, you were about to let yourself in with the spare key before the door swung open.

"Oh! Er Y/n?"

"Yeh um hi." You had to shout a bit over the sound of what must now be classified as a storm.

"Toms not-"

"I know. Can I come in?" As awkward and stunted as this conversation was, if you didn't get out of the rain asap you would literally end up drowned.

“Oh er yeh-yeh yeh come in.”

Harry stammered as he held the door open, gesturing for you to enter into the tiled hallway. Gratefully, you followed, throwing your sopping wet hood back down and wiping your feet on the floor.

"Sorry for just showing up, but I left some scripts here. My management are on my arse to read them and-"

"And you waited till Tom left for mum and dads?" The fluffy-haired boy has caught you red-handed; there was no defence, so you didn't even try.

Because yes, you knew on a Friday afternoon when Tom was home he would always, like clockwork, go to his parents just to kick back and watch gogglebox with both of them. It was only natural then that you chose Friday afternoon to come and pick up your stuff.

"I've been waiting in my car for half an hour till I saw him leave." Harry half laughed at that, still the two of you standing opposite each other in the hallway. "Um, do you… do you hate me Harry?"

Clearly, he hadn't quite been expecting your question going by the way his eyes almost bugged out his head.

"No, I-I, of course, I don't… look, I'm home alone so you fancy a cuppa?" Not being able to help the small chuckle, you nodded appreciatively, following Harry through the house.

"Your answer to everything is tea."

Harry had prepared the two mugs in silence as you sat at the table waiting patiently - if nervously too. You didn't miss how Harry had still used your favourite mug, having had to dig through the cupboard to find the weird square-shaped thing. Once done, he rounded the kitchen island and placed it in front of you, which you instantly cradled in two hands - for the hope of warming you up.

"You cold?" Obviously, it was pretty evident that sitting in your rain-soaked hoodie was not cosy at all. "Hang on a sec."

The boy sprung up again, returning moments later with a hoodie in hand, one he offered out to you with a little smile. The issue was that him and Tom shared clothes, so the hoodie he was kindly offering to you also had been worn by Tom before. Which made it hurt a little bit to wear. It was better than sitting soaked through though.

"How have you been then?"

"Not the best, to be honest, but uh… how about you?"

"Being with Tom while he's fighting with you? Oh, it's a barrel of laughs. You might've escaped it, but I haven't." He was trying to lighten the mood, and you appreciated it, offering him a half-smile that didn't really meet your eyes.

"Yeh sorry about that."

"Don't apologise; it doesn't sound like it's your fault Y/n."

That surprised you. Tom, especially when he was in moods like he was when you argued, wasn't one to admit when he was wrong. It was usually how the world was against him and how he was so hard done by. Accepting responsibility was something he hadn't said to you yet - but at least, small steps.

"He say that?"

"Pretty much… doesn't seem like he's angry at you, but-but he's still angry."

"At the world?" You rolled your eyes; this seemed to be the same old Tom through and through. Still immature. Still not with the right mindset.

"At himself." Harry countered, slightly entertained, when he saw the flash of surprise in your face as he sipped his drink. "And me… if I dare to so much as breathe this week."

This time you properly laughed, and Harry joined in too before the room fell back to silence - except the noise of the rain hitting the garden patio slats. You swirled the tea round in your mug, feeling the brunette's eyes on you. He'd always been your fake little brother too, since you'd met the Hollands way back 3 and a half years ago. Tom and yourself were barely adults, which meant the twins were still proper children. Harry had always been the one that understood you. Hollands, by nature, loved humans - loved to talk, to chat, to gossip. But sometimes, doing all that socialising got too much for you, as it did for Harry. He was the only one that seemed to understand social exhaustion. So when those moments had hit, you'd kept each other company in silence.

He got you, sometimes in ways your own boyfriend didn't.

"You know why he got so worked up, right?" You shook your head, looking up curiously. "Dad got under his skin on his birthday zoom thing."

Ah, now that did seem to coincide with the start of Tom's more petulant phase. To be fair, Tom had been asking to move in together for near enough a year now - but it was only in the past month it seemed to be the only thing you'd talk about and obviously only three days since the flight back. Dom's birthday barely a week ago, whilst you and Tom were both filming - except Tom had managed to get a day off where you hadn't. So you hadn't heard this conversation.

"What'd he say?"

"Was talking about how he and mum were settling down at Toms age, joked about how you rejected him, said maybe you were holding out for something better."

"Something better?" Harry sighed, leaning forward onto his elbows.

"He'd seen an article just off a trashy tabloid… it named you Hollywood's golden girl or something, said you could have the pick of any person on the planet…"

Of all the people in the world, why is Tom affected by shit journalism? He knows how much bullshit people write. He knows how it's all made up, exaggerated nonsense. And what he should know, completely and totally, is how much you love him. And if he didn't, was that your fault? Had you done something wrong, something to make him doubt you?

Harry seemed to notice the internal dialogue going on in your head, adding to the point. "It wasn't the article though, it was the fact dad said it."

Hmmm.

You and Dom got on; it wasn't like you hated the possible future father in law or whatever. Just…. you had very different outlooks. As much as Tom prided himself on how' grounded his family keeps him' -to you at least, they aren't entirely at sea level either. They'd never really had any particular struggles in life. They were the definition of middle class, and that's about it. They lived in a posh suburb of London, had all their family still around. It was the perfect family.

And whilst you were in no illusions about how privileged your life was now. It hadn't always been. You'd never had the 'nuclear' family. Instead, only your dad and a string of dodgy and fleeting stepmothers while struggling to make ends meet. So you were just always wary of Dom, of his opinions that so often his boys took for gospel. They always seemed pretty sheltered and close-minded.

And yet, Tom was a grown man.

"I get that, I just… Tom should know that we know more about our relationship than his dad. I mean,… have I done something wrong? Made him think I'm not in this for the long haul?"

"No nonono Y/n he's just… well he's an idiot, isn't he? I don't think he properly understands why you're cautious about moving and everything. He's just an idio- "

Harry was cut off for lightly insulting his brother by the sound of the front door opening, both of your heads swivelling towards the source. You then met Harry's eyes in a panic, to which he replied relatively simply.

"Just talk to each other. For my sake." You would've argued if it weren't for the fact you were so focused on Tom's shuffling around in the entrance hallway - back early from his parents.

"Baz? Where you at? I thought I saw Y/n's car and-"

"Kitchen!!!" Before Tom could say anything else, possibly landing himself in more trouble, Harry interrupted as his chair screeched while standing up. And then Tom was just there. Standing in the doorway, his arms dropping limply to his side as he noticed you. Everything about that moment seemed to freeze, when you locked eyes with him for the first time in three days. It didn't go unnoticed, the way his Adams apple bobbed, the way his eyes widen. The boy looked plain and simply terrified.

It was Harry who broke the silence, after giving you a stern look that said 'stay'. The younger Holland boy walked up to Tom and spoke.

"Try actually talking and actually listening about your problems with each other." And then he was gone, down the hallway and up the stairs.

For a few moments, Tom stayed absolutely stationary, now staring at where Harry had been when speaking to the both of you (but mainly Tom). Long enough to put your sense of unease at an all-time high, ready to make a break for it.

"If you don't want to talk, then I can leav-"

"NO!" Apparently snapping out of it, Tom exclaimed loud enough to make you flinch from your seat. "Sorry! I-I just… I wasn't expecting to… you know, to see you."

"Yeh I just uh- just came to pick up some scripts… Harry cornered me with a tea, though; otherwise, I'd be…."

"Baz thinks the whole world could be fixed with tea."

"that's what I said!" You instinctively responded, forgetting the fact you're supposed to be mad at him, and just for a second falling back into your normal flow.

Tom didn't even try to hide his grin in response, until you quickly corrected your face- then he did too. Turning around to put the kettle on for himself. Because right now, he needed to fix his whole world, and he needed all the help he could get. For a period, the only noise was the sound of the kettle boiling, then the teaspoon clinking against the mug as he stirred - until he padded over, taking the seat across from you.

"So."

"So."

"It's been a while," Tom stated the bloody obvious.

"You never called."

"Didn't think you'd want me to."

You thought that the early signs weren't all that auspicious. His ability to read a situation once again failing.

"I wanted you to say something."

"Say what?"

"What do you think Tom?" He replied to the sarcastic tone by sucking in a sharp breath, holding it for a second, before slowly exhaling. As if trying to compose himself, take time to think of a response - a mature move for him.

"Well, I think you want me to say sorry? For being so moody and not waiting for you and for upsetting those kids. And thanks too, for covering for me?"

You just hummed. Waiting for him to continue. Because yes, you did deserve all those things. But you also deserved more. An apology for, oh I don't know, saying he didn't think you loved him? It was a wait that never ended, he had nothing more to add.

"Going by your face, I take it I missed something?"

The bloody cheek of it.

"Theres nothing else? Nothing else at all? …" You gave him that chance, the opportunity but all he could respond with was a shake of his head. "You thought I was fine about you saying that I don't love you?" You hadn't intended on raising your voice, but really you hadn't realised you did till after the fact. To blinded by rage at his ignorance.

"You want to talk about this now?"

"When else Tom?" You sighed, realising he perhaps wasn't ready for this conversation. Maybe he needed more time to think things through, have sense talked into him by various wiser family members. Or maybe, he never would be. That was the worst-case scenario. But also… you're most likely prediction.

He shuffled in his seat, clearing his voice but not saying anything. Not a peep.

"I have spent three years of my life with you. I've had countless nights of too little sleep because that was the only time you could facetime. I've exposed my relationship to the world and people's opinions because you didn't want to hide. All I've done is love you. How could you even say that?" There might've been tears in your eyes, yet you were determined to keep them at bay. You needed to have this out, one way or another, to be clear and cohesive and logical. No time to cry.

"Y/n I know that, I…" He sighed, instinctively reaching for your hand, but you were quicker to pull it away. There was hurt in his eyes, but so there should be. "It just sometimes feels like that's it for you. That yeh you love me but you just want to standstill. That this is as much as it'll ever be."

Your emotions were suddenly uncontainable. Your voice croaked as you whispered, "Have I done something wrong?"

"No love, nonono if that's how you feel then that's okay. But it's something I'm not… shit this is hard." He took a pause to take a sip of his drink, your glazed eyes never leaving his. "I don't think I can stand still anymore. And yeh I was pissy and childish the other day because my dad got under my skin about the whole moving in thing… But these past few days, it just has got me thinking. Because I love you, so much."

This time when he reached out to grab your hand, you actually leaned into it yourself. Not because you were giving in, but because this hurt. This hurt so fucking much that you needed something to ground you, or else god knows. Because the way he was speaking, it sounded so finite.

"I love you too."

"I do know, which is…is why this is so hard." At the very least, Tom had conceded that.

The conversation ceased to silence yet again. The room felt so cold; even Tom/Harry's hoodie was doing nothing to keep you from the endless empty cold that seemed to be coming from within.

"When I re-registered my health card last month, and I made you my emergency contact on it. I-I made you my next of kin on everything actually. I didn't think about it twice. And-and this-"You pulled your phone out of your back pocket, immediately pulling up the app onto the open page. "This is my Pinterest board for our baby's nursery theme. I know-" You paused, to quickly wipe your cheeks clear of the tear tracks that may or may not have been there. "I know it's probably a long way away, but I just love the Scandinavian theme." You laughed at yourself, suddenly embarrassed at your blabbering and quickly pulled up a different app. "And this… this was from the other week when I was helping Y/bf/n start her vows." Hands trembling as you turned the phone around for Tom to see again. "She was finding it really tricky so she said, what would you say to Tom on your wedding, so-so I made this list." You only dared to look at him when you were sure he'd be reading through that note.

It was bizarre because he looked… well, he looked happy. Here you were feeling traumatised, showing things that you'd barely even deeped how committed they were - and he was pleased? Feeling the fire burn once again inside of your chest, you quickly swiped the phone away and back into your pocket. Only then did he look up, eyes widening - presumably at quite how psychotic you looked.

"So don't you dare say that I don't want a future with you."

You said it with such force, there was a pause. Tom letting those words sink deep into his brain. The way his expression flickered minutely gave you hope. You thought he got it. You thought he really understood now.

"But why don't you want to move in then?"

There it was again. He knew why. But he didn't get it. And, probably, he never would.

You were about to crash completely. So you ran. As fast as your legs could carry you, not even aware of your chair crashing to the floor in your wake. You ran out of that house and away from him. Away from who you had thought was the love of your life.

?give tom a final chance w one last part?

feedback is always v v appreciated <3

tom taglist : @lovehollandy12 @hollandlover19 @thefernandasantana @hunnybunimdun @hallecarey1@cedricdiggorysimpp @msmimimerton @hollandfanficlove @pandaxnienke @crossyourpeter @thegirlwiththeimpala @tom-softie @sunwardsss @spiitfiiires @radcloudenthusiast @ladykxxx08

people i think might be interestd in this (sorry if not just let me know and i'll remove the tag!!!): @obiwanownsmyass @wildxwidow @parkersvogue @coffeewithoutcaffeine @tomhollandlol @thefallenbibliophilequote @clumsymandu @hiraethenthusiast @mannien @abrielleholland @evermorehabit @niallberry @greatpizzascissorstaco @runawayolives @annathesillyfriend @letsgotothemoonlight @lovelybarnes

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