Some people put their whole hearts into trying to make Mollymauk a Glee character when he is, at his core, somewhere between a washed up magician selling fake silk sheets on daytime television and a line cook in an ankle-length fur coat who you meet at a drag show, who feeds your dog filet mignon and then ghosts you halfway through your third date.
I have been crying everyday for 60 days since you left. Days have passed. But the pain is still here. Will time really heal this? I wish that I could erase our memories together. No matter what I do, from the moment I wake up and up to the time I'll go to sleep. It will still be you popping in my head and barging into my dreams.
It's painful, dreading and unbearable knowing that what we had is already long gone. You were already gone even before you left me. I have ignored the signs. I knew, deep down, that you were leaving me anytime soon.
No matter how much we prepare for the pain that's coming, we are never actually prepared for it.
He lays in my bed in the early morning, my heart embellished with despair. I know in my mind that we cannot be together, but I inch closer and closer to him anyway. His hand settled onto my stomach in the night and his breath pushes warm air onto my neck. I miss him. His hips are up against mine and I know that the only reason I’m here is through his desperation for a bodily connection and not for love. We drank and laughed, I almost cried, he confessed false love and called me pet names and he held me like I was a dog. His bitch. I followed him around like an animal and all I can do is lay awake in regret. He won’t be up for hours. I want to pretend that this is love, so I do. I push my hips closer to his and tug on his arm to wrap him closer around me. If I could, I’d give him one last kiss. I know we won’t speak in his rise, only to part goodbye, good riddance, our time together has adjourned. We won’t admit it but know it, I am not his, and he is not mine, but I once was.
don't hook up with your exes...
writing prompt 11/16/23; i wonder if he misses me too. (he called me two weeks ago after months of no contact to tell me he still loved me)