https://twitter.com/BrendanBlaber/status/113740298927726182
It’s starting to get to the point where I am honestly considering not apologizing for blowing up at people.
Because every single time I do, I end up finding out I should’ve been about ten times HARSHER.
‘Zero Character Interaction’
Fucking really?
Yang: (singing) Hel-looooo! I believe you two may know each other?
Blake: Aren't you... that girl that exploded?
Ruby: Uh, yeah! My name's Ruby! But you can just call me Crater... (smiles, embarrassed) Actually, you can just call me Ruby.
Blake: (back in her book) Okay.
Yang: (whispering to Ruby) What are you doing?
Ruby: (whispering back) I don't know - help me! (goes back to smiling)
Yang: So... What's your name?
Blake: (sighing as she's distracted yet again) Blake.
Yang: Well, Blake, I'm Yang, Ruby's older sister! I like your bow!
Blake: (irritated) Thanks!
Yang: It goes great with your... pajamas!
Blake: Right...
Yang: (as Ruby laughs uncomfortably) Nice night, don't you think?
Yang: What! You want some, too?!
The Ursa rears up and prepares to strike... right when a whirling noise is heard and the monster makes a befuddled noise, falling down a second later to reveal Blake Belladonna with her Gambol Shroud in the beast's back.
Yang pants in exhaustion while Blake recalls the weapon back to her hand, sheathing it on her back and smiling to the side (or the audience, if she broke the fourth wall). Yang, now purple-eyed again, speaks to her new partner over the smoking remains of the monster.
Yang: I could've taken him.
Yang: Think this is it?
In response, Blake gives Yang an incredulous look and heads down the hill, her partner following. They walk across the floor and observe the items on each pedestal, now shown to be familiar shapes.
Blake: (looking at a black king, confused) Chess pieces?
Yang: Some of them are missing. Looks like we weren't the first ones here.
Blake: Well, I guess we should pick one.
Yang: Think this is it?
In response, Blake gives Yang an incredulous look and heads down the hill, her partner following. They walk across the floor and observe the items on each pedestal, now shown to be familiar shapes.
Blake: (looking at a black king, confused) Chess pieces?
Yang: Some of them are missing. Looks like we weren't the first ones here.
Blake: Well, I guess we should pick one.
Back at the temple, Yang approaches one of the relics.
Yang: Hmmmm... (studies the golden knight, then picks it up and shows it to Blake) How about a cute little pony?
Blake: (smirking) Sure. (they walk towards each other to the center of the temple floor)
Yang: That wasn't too hard!
Blake: Well, it's not like this place is very difficult to find. (they share a smile)
Blake: (back on the ground, looking at the tree) Did your sister just fall from the sky?
Yang: I...
-
Blake: Did that girl just ride in on an Ursa?
Yang: I...
-
Blake: Did she just run all the way here with a Death Stalker on her tail?
Yang: (getting angrier until she growls and erupts in a small burst of fire, eyes flashing red) I can't take it anymore! Can everyone just chill out for two seconds before something crazy happens again?!
-
Blake: What is it?
Yang: (staring proudly at Ruby as she leaps on a boulder and motions the group onward) Nothing... (she moves on as Blake smiles in realization - possibly towards the audience - and leaves as well)
Blake: It's tougher than it looks!
Yang: (readying her Ember Celica) Then let's hit it with everything we got!
Blake: "Blake."
Yang: "Are you sure you didn't hit your head?" (Blake hits her side) "Oh, I'm Yang."
Yang: Whatcha doing?
Blake: Nothing. (Blake closes her book.) Just going over notes from last semester.
Yang catches a grape in her mouth.
Yang: Lame.
Yang: (Putting her arms up behind her head.) Alright Blake, you're up!
Blake: Oh, um, sorry, what am I doing?
Yang: You're playing as Vale, trying to conquer the Kingdoms of Remnant!
Blake: Right.
Yang: (Pumps her fist enthusiastically and points at Blake.) Yes! I love it when you're feisty!
And I’ll stop here because I’ve already proven you wrong ten times over BEFORE the Dance arc which is where things really start kicking into high gear between these two.
Ten times. Before they have their own establishing moment. THAT is how wrong you are.
‘No Dynamic’
They have the fucking dynamic of ‘brooder and bubbly persons’. This is one of the most BASIC writing techniques of all time. You’d have to be blind to not see a dynamic this obvious.
‘Are they even friends?’
Considering Yang outright talked about her issues with Raven for the first time because she was worried about Blake-
“Do you understand the concept of ‘friends’” is a better question.
‘Literally have they even spoken?’
Dunno, have you not made a complete ass of yourself?
This is IGNORING how his video is suppose to be ‘satire’ AKA a mockery of what he is doing here as well as the fact that THE SHIP ISN’T CANON.
Jello, you fail at satire because there is no irony, there is no exaggeration because you LEGITIMATELY believe this and the ridicule is on par with a rascist dumbass mocking a race of people: HE’S more of a joke than the ‘joke.’You fail at being critical because this is the same uninformed shit spewing out of everyone’s mouth.You fail at being funny because your jokes are either outdated as fuck or are just plain wrong.You accomplished NOTHING and you’re only being defended because MurderOfBirds is a nice guy.
13 notes
·
View notes