#bro y'all dont know how much this man means to me..

[dolliestfairy]

𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑛𝑔𝑒𝑟'𝑠 𝑏𝑎𝑏𝑦 𝅄ֹ ׅ♡ ೀ ʚĭɞ ‌ིᨴּ ˒˒۪

(Crazy) Yandere [Nerd] Boy x Soft!Chubby!Fem!Reader ༢𓏲๋ ⊹ ֢

𔓘 Tw : Kidnapping, Extreme Noncon (y'all are strangers bro), Rushed Fanfic, Mentions Of Blood, Virginity-Take, Extreme Somnophilia, Stalking, Extreme Obsession, Impregnate, A little of Bondage, Seriously dude you're fucking with a crazy nerd boy who is a freaking stranger to you like y'all didnt know each other but this madman is really know you to the soul from all his stalking and stuff. this fanfic is quite the Dead Dove Do Not Eat. Chubby reader fics with no skintone of reader mentioned.

𔓘 A/N : y'all.. this are f***king insane bro.. like this is kinda disturbing imo as a writer of this and also a lot of suffocating. Read at your own risk. me myself actually like the extreme yandere fics but this is still the prefix of it. stay safe while reading this because again; y'all are a stranger!! if a dark content yandere isnt your cup of tea then i highly recommend you to spend your shit at other blogs!! ty.

W/C : 6,4K for Stranger Fucking 💀

Currently thinking abt nerdy men who looks like they would shit in their pants when someone raised their voice at them, but the truth is; he's really really quite the strong. he's a nerdy man who arent shy at all (or maybe just a little) and he's simply just dont like to be bothered by anyone else. he's also a nerdy man who told himself countless time to just focus on studying and studying, and at the first moment; he actually manage to do it within his daily life, well until he met you.

You; plump, soft looking girl with chubby cheeks and doe eyes. you dont even know how much you affect him didnt you? arent you just dumb? walking there and then with such a tiny skirt that almost showed up your plump ass cheeks. walking down in the hallway with such dress that hugged all of your curves together perfectly. oh if only you find out how every night he would spend his time in his bedroom alone while his hand thrust his own cock up and down, thinking about you. he would be drown in his thoughts about how you would find out all his dark fantasy about you. but.. he do realize he shouldnt be doing this actually, no really, he should just be studying, but the soft laugh and those.. those whimpers terror you gave him just drove him to his edge.

And the fact that he masturbate about you when you both are clearly still stranger - is fucking crazy. he mostly had heard of how'd you talk, whimper and moan (wait.. how did.. he know?) and stuff like that while your own self being completely un guard around him. he swear to his thumbs he hated you for making him felt like this, i mean how could you?? a plump girl just trying to get into her daily life as normal as usual can make some nerd dude mad in love with her without her being aware at all?! he cant do this.. he cant do this anymore..!

And he really cant do it anymore. as he go to your apartement at midnight after finding out where you live. peeking through the window to what you were doing only to find you dressing in a short pastel rainbow dress lingerie with big bows placed in the back of your hair, dancing to some songs.. and oh my god he cant even explain how much he want to ripped those colorful dress lingerie off your body. he has no doubt at all that you have the most beautiful body he would ever sees in his entire life.

As he drown himself in his own thoughts until he heard a telephone ring -- it was your friend! your male friend! as you picked the phone up, talking with your friends, while he sees with his own eyes about the way you laugh softly at what-god-knows your friend was muttering to you. he doesnt and he would rather bury himself alive than admitting about the fact that he was really, really, envy and jealous. as he harshly breath at you, while all his body is literally focus with you. his eyes seeing you from head-to-toe, his ears listening carefully about the conversation you're having as his mouth try to resist to open it again because well um -- he is quite the drooling over there. that was it until you start to walk towards the front door where he was outside!!

As he sees you carefully, while hiding himself in the corner, and focused on the door handle you're about to open. until........

Until he quickly enough to put his arms and placed it onto your mouth, shuting you up until you passed out and bring you to your new home his home. as he open the bondage he placed at your mouth, and pinch your chubby cheeks until he sees your whimpering again. thats it! thats the thing that always drove him mad everydsy everynight. thinking about you whimper at whatever he was doing was like a holy candle for him. he then stood himself up, looking at your half unconscious body, and then start to strip you... to naked.

As he softly ripped all the dress lingerie you weared, and after he got the look at your boobs, he slowly put his hands up at where your nipples on, and start playing with it. while his eyes focused on your face, waiting the reaction he have been wait. and until then... you are moaning. honestly he have been thinking that he was in a dream that time. i mean -- he do have seen you moan by the way he always check on you secretly.. but he never except his own self to be the only one who could capable enough to hear your soft moan. as he sped up the phase of his hands playing your nipple, while his own other hand strat to undress himself.

And until he and your own finally completely naked. and... oh god to be damned. he swear he always sees you at some kind of whore while your other friend sees you just as an innocent normal girl, and he always have no doubt about his feelings That you have such an erotic body and at the end.. he was actually right. you do have a very very.. pleaseable body. as he placed his hands into your half unconscious body, lowering it until his hands touch your private part -- your pussy. he slowly but surely put his 3 long fingers in to play with you, and to be surprised or.. shocked even, that you are so so fucking damn tight! he even sure that your pussy is one of the most tightest thing he'd ever placed his hands on, as he quickly sped-ing up his pace at playing your pussy, watching you moan and whimper become one, he cant believe what he saw. you're literally still half unconscious! but yet you somehow still manage to bring out the sound he would die for with! at this rate he doesnt know if he wants to wake you up or just let you still be half unconscious so when you wake up, you're gonna have a some extra surprised with your naked body that has been covered with his cums. as he thinking about it while he placed his (quite big) cock at your pussy. trying to rip those tight wall of your pussy off. thats what he was trying to do until your pussy start showing a little drop of blood out of it.

Oh.. he get it.. yeah he actually get it. You're a Virgin arent you? oh.. such sweet cheeks.. well too bad yoi're going to give all of your innocents left as his own hands and dicks. the body of someone you dont even know at all. he actually felt (just a little) bit of guilt. but who cares anyway? you're literally still half unconscious! as he said it to himself while he tried his possible to pound your ass up at your fat pussy. going in and up in every corner. at first it was slowly, but then he start to change the position into a mating press just so the cums and the blood are still there. as he quickly but surely speeding his pace up like a mad man. at this rate he was at the edge of doesnt gave a fuck about the fact that you're still half unconscious but then he's also at the edge of shock and unbelief because of how you are still not waking up at his pounding.

And all of those pounding ends when his cock start to dried out with how your fat pussy suck all his cums and sperma in. pulling his cock out of your pussy only to see the view of the inside of your pussy, being drown with his cums. as his hands hold your body up just so all the cums he had restored isnt goung to spill. and until then he slowly put his hands down, letting your body down into the mating press position, watching your pussy spilling all of his cums like a fucking waterfall. (his cum waterfall) and then he placed his palm hands at your cheeks softly, while quietly muttering about how he would take care of you, and keeping you safe and that you wouldnt need to be scared of him (even after all his done to you) as he placed his other hand at your undressed belly, and then stroke it with such gentleness because he knew that right now, right at the almost-morning time, that you're going to be swellen with thousands - thousands of his sperm, and at the end of the month, he would see you placed your own hands at your bellies who at that time was full with his kid. oh how he cant wait... he just hope that you wouldnt be freaked out about the fact that you just found yourself in a unrecognizeable place with a literal fucking stranger who is now has placed a baby inside of you. yes, a baby -- his baby.

TSUKISHIMA KEI, ITOSHI RIN, MEGUMI, Itachi, Shikamaru, Nanami, Neji, Tobirama, Deku, KUNIMI, Muichiro, SEMI EITA, Konoha Akinori, Venti, XIAO, AL-HAITAM, Akaashi, KOZUME KENMA, & hatake kakashi.

did i forgeting anyone? insert ur fav!

Dolliestfairy's © Works. Do Not Repost My Creation at Any Platfroms Without My Permission.

#chubby reader #plus size reader #anime x chubby reader #haikyuu dark content #haikyuu x chubby reader #jujutsu kaisen x chubby reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #naruto smut #naruto x reader #itachi x reader #itachi smut #tw.dark content #tw.yandere #tw.pregnancy #tw.virginity #tsukishima x reader #tsukishima kei x chubby reader #tsukishima kei smut #rin itoshi x reader #yandere blue lock #blue lock x chubby reader #genshin impact smut #yandere genshin #genshin x reader #genshin smut #kakashi x reader #kakashi smut #kenma smut #kenma x reader #al haitam x reader

[ynbabe]

Party all night- Lance Stroll x Partygirl! Reader

Am I perhaps obsessed with this vibe? Yes, will I maybe turn this into a series for all the drivers? idk yall tell me 🫣

as always comments and requests are always welcome!!

People don't always like Lance but they definitely don't like his party girl girlfriend.

f1behindts

liked by 21,023 users

f1behindts Lance Stroll was seen with his girlfriend in the clubs of London before the start of the 2024 season

view all 11004 comments

username She’s so prettyyyyyy

username right??? How’d mans pull that???

Username she’s only with him for his money I mean why else?

Username IS HE SMOKING

Username why is he in f1 again? Obviously he doesn’t care about putting the hours in and now he’s smoking? Like give the seat to a driver that deserves it rather than daddy’s boy over here

Babeitsy/nl/n

babeitsy/nl/n london how you have my heart ❤️

yourbsf1 Why'd we let you choose the club??

babeitsy/nl/n cause i know the best spots 🤭 yourbsf2 you literally ran off with ur bf 5 sec in yourbsf3 exactly BOOOO lancestroll sorry guys but she loves me more 🤷‍♂️

username bro how is he with someone like her...

username shes literally making him smoke doesn't she know how bad that is for F1 drivers?

babeitsy/nl/n girl he had a lollipop in his mouth 😭 I love my vroom vroom man very much yourbsf1 idk why yall think we can make this man do shit. he's soooo stubborn

lancestroll ❤️

babeitsy/nl/n miss you alr mwuah

babeitsy/nl/n

babeitsy/nl/n me and @/yourbsf1 with @/fernandoalofficial

babeitsy/nl/n finally met the man the myth the legend, thanks babe!!

lancestroll could not get her to stop giggling, this old man stole my girlfriend fernandoalofficial it was good to meet you, your a lucky man lancito

yourbsf1 came in uniform for this moment 🫡

username why is she sticking to him?? lance break up with her man, shes a 304

username girl he's not gonna pick you, why dont you let that girl live

username the fact that Lance thinks that his girlfriend would leave him for alonso says a lot about her ewwww

lancestroll

lancestroll to the best girlfriend, I'll love you even when you drag me to clubs at 3 at night and your friends keep stealing my coffee. I don't care what others say you're the love of my life.

babeitsy/nl/n aww baby i love you 🥹

lancestroll love you too babe

yourbsf2 the call-out was unnecessary but I'll allow it cause this is sweet

username he really said fuck yall i love my girl

username the way y'all were dogging on her, now what??

hope yall liked this!! requests are always open!!

#f1 #formula 1 #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 smau #lance stroll x reader #lance stroll #fernando alonso

[newestq]

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎ p1h jealous headcannon, requested

ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆ lowercase intended, send in your requests

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

୨ yoon keeho, ୧

ꕥ ignores you 'cause oh boy don't know how to cope.

ꕥ you try to get his attention, but he doesn't even bat and eyelash towards you.

ꕥ he's trying to distract himself but finding anything to do in the kitchen.

ꕥ "fine, be that way. i'm going hang out with intak.

ꕥ "yeah, bet you'd rather hang out with him, huh?"

ꕥ you're both kind of shocked at what he said.

ꕥ "what's your problem?"

ꕥ "what's my problem? you've been attached to intak's hip all day!"

ꕥ "i played a video game with him and that made you jealous?"

ꕥ "i'm not jealous!"

ꕥ jiung eventually joins the conversation, and you both make fun of him as he tries to prove his point.

୨ choi taeyang, ୧ (gender specific.)

ꕥ classic "jealous? me? no."

ꕥ but oh yes he's jealous.

ꕥ he doesn't think it's fair that as a girl barista, guys should be able to order from you.

ꕥ call him toxic and he might agree.

ꕥ rolls his eyes every time a guy walks up to the counter.

ꕥ it's genuinely so bad.

ꕥ you've kind of noticed his sour mood, so on your break, you walk over to him.

ꕥ "what's up?"

ꕥ "what's up? so i'm your bro now?"

ꕥ "my what?"

ꕥ "nah, it's fine man. go with your other boyfriends."

ꕥ you find him humorous.

ꕥ "see you tonight, babe."

ꕥ "nope! you won't see me! i'm leaving you!"

ꕥ yeah, y'all watched frozen while eating chocolate covered strawberries.

ꕥ he ain't leaving you that easy lmao

୨ choi jiung, ୧

ꕥ the type to feel guilty that he feels jealous.

ꕥ he doesn't mean to, and he immediately apologizes.

ꕥ "baby, i'm sorry. i promise i'm not overprotective."

ꕥ "literally wtf are you talking about?"

ꕥ "when you laughed at taeyang's joke, i got so mad. idek why."

ꕥ "his jokes are funnier than yours."

ꕥ "you know im not sorry anymore."

ꕥ you give him more and more reasons to not feel guilty.

୨ hwang intak, ୧

ꕥ clingy.

ꕥ will literally not let you go/leave his sight.

ꕥ not even to use the bathroom.

ꕥ best believe mf is sitting on the sink, scrolling through his phone.

ꕥ "intak. i know you're not happy because that girl flirted with me, but can i please shit in peace."

ꕥ "no. what if she finds you and takes you from me."

ꕥ "intak please let me use the bathroom alone. we're at home."

ꕥ "she might've followed us. i won't look. see."

ꕥ he faces away from you and scrolls through tik tok.

ꕥ you kind of wish he'd be the type to ignore you 💀

୨ haku shota, ୧

ꕥ doesnt really get jealous.

ꕥ he trusts you, and you trust him, so thats enough.

ꕥ and he doesn't really think anyone is cool enough to catch your attention.

ꕥ i mean, what other minecraft pro do you know?

ꕥ what other awesome freestyle dancer do you know?

ꕥ who do you know that loves fries as much as you??

ꕥ exactly.

ꕥ you wish he would get jealous.

ꕥ "someone just asked me for my phone number."

ꕥ "y/n, you signed up for updates for the store. of course the cashier needed your number."

ꕥ "shota please get jealous once."

୨ kim jongseob, ୧

ꕥ wouldnt even realize he's jealous

ꕥ he'd just have this strong feeling towards you and he'd just accept it.

ꕥ like wouldnt even know whats going on.

ꕥ he's probably go to the members freaking out.

ꕥ "idk why i feel this way, like just thinking abt them hanging out with their best friend makes me upset. why!! thats their best friend, i dont have a say on who they can or cannot hang out with, but my god does it piss me off when they do."

ꕥ "seobie, that my friend is jealousy."

ꕥ "jealousy? how do you know?"

ꕥ "cause i feel it every time jiung gets center."

ꕥ "intak..."

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

i wrote this at 10:18pm....

#kpop #p1harmony #p1h #p1h keeho #p1h theo #p1h jiung #p1h intak #p1h soul #p1h jongseob #p1h fluff #p1harmony fanfic #p1h headcannons #piwon #newestq

[whysojiminimnida]

so let's out jhope as bisexual?? your insider info is just as bad as the stalkers bts have. totally inappropriate. but you're just a small tumblr blog why should it matter? it 100% does. there is something wrong with you. it's not your place to be giving this info to anyone unless you are an attention seeker. Dont read your blog right if you don't like it?? shame on you really. it's nobody's place to out anyone elses sexuality EVER.

Oh my Lord, Frances. Calm DOWN. I mean the man literally did this back in July in front of how many people? Are you even aware of Equal Sign?

I can't win with some of y'all and yet here you are to school me regardless. Which I would appreciate had I not my own Korean gay couple to explain things, had I not been intimately involved with the unstr8 community since before your birth most likely, had I not lost friends to AIDS when that was still a thing. And since I'm feeling generous I'mma school your sensitive ass right back so since you're here just have several seats and pay attention. SCHOOL IS IN SESSION.

"Somebody I know says he is openly bisexual" is EXACTLY THE SAME THING AS "someone I know says he's straight" WITH ONE DIFFERENCE. That difference is negligible in much of the world but in some places I will readily agree that it's not. Korea is one of those places. That's a dude on that bed, btw. In case you were unclear about the message.

We all knew Hobi was bi back then. You did too, don't lie because your white horse got a cramp. Give the crusade a lil rest and let's ride right along. See, in Korea it is one thing to BE part of the alphabet mafia. It is another thing entirely to SAY it. Out loud. And you are correct that in those exact words, Hobi has never verbatim-ly said it. But honestly, you're coming off with a lot of internalized biphobia or a serious denial issue if you can't extrapolate the message from the above imagery alone, much less his lyrics. To his own music. Which he released publicly and has performed in front of, what, a hundred thousand people or so? Live? Plus it's right there on Hulu and Youtube if you're concerned about his level of visibility. Of course he also did this:

And I don't know about you but for me it's a little harder to ignore the specificity of the color arrangement of those gloves in light of his performance. But see here's the thing, he's never really hidden his bisexuality from us. Very much like other unstr8 BTS members, he has openly chosen to use inclusive pronouns in his music. He has worn many, many items - far too many to list here - in support of inclusivity, knowing well that some, even most people would see support as personal identification. He has smilingly played the court jester knowing that some people would ignore him, some would validate him, and some would use him to virtue-signal as a cover for their own dis-ease.

To ignore that is to ignore the totality of Jung Hoseok as a person and is far more disrespectful, in my own admittedly tiny corner of the internet. You do you, if it makes you feel better. I just can't magine any straight man filming entire videos in a Gucci pride flag sweater without a certain amount of personal input.

Not to point out the obvious but also, would a straight guy really voluntarily share a room with Park Jimin for YEARS?

On PURPOSE?

I mean we all know Jungkook was literally sleeping with Jimin in that bed on the left, we have the receipts and admissions, ain't nobody honestly and truly confused at this point. Again, it's a matter of degrees of difference, but in Hobi's case it's a pretty big degree. Being a single bi dude who also DOES IN FACT like and date women is a very far cry, Korean-militarily-speaking, from being a committed gay couple. It's not even in the same realm, honestly, and that whole military question is a hot mess I'm not going to deal with here. But I knew you were thinking about it so I thought I'd mention it.

Irene ain't care, bro. She's out there hitting the rainbow and fire emojis every damn time he posts. And if you need to take a deep breath and have another look at why you're so bothered that people around Hobi don't hide who he is, maybe go on and do that. Because his friends know him better than we do, okay. And they love him, as do (hopefully) we all. I do. And if I thought for one instant that my saying he is openly bi would hurt him, I would never. I run a "Jeon-Parks are gay/fucking/married in all but name" blog, for heaven's sake. I really don't think anyone expects me to be saying anything other than the blatantly obvious. If that suuuuuper hurts your feelings and makes you angry, please feel free to locate your nearest J-Hope "Under The Rainbow" photo and use it to vacate the premises.

There it is!

I did not out this man. He outs himself without my help.

#there's always a hobi #bisexual king #i'd say thanks anon but i'm getting salty #so i appreciate your input kinda but that's as far as i go

[international-sunrise]

god its me again, with lookism spoilers below the cut

the way everyone gathered with their respective rescues like they're a stray cat or this month's grocery shop is just way too funny y'all but the way jinsung arrived with johan in tow and was immediately like "dude why does it looks like hyungseok was trying to rescue jaeyeol and not the other way around????? why is he knock knock knocking on heavens door???????? what the fuck did you do to him???????????" and hyungseok was like "i promise you there's a very good reason for this :D" smiley emoji and all and jinsung is just "don't????? change the subject????? you almost killed him?????????????" just left me cackling for five minutes straight thanks jinsung i knew i could trust you

jihan walking in carrying jibeom and hudson in a carrier after alexander was deadass carrying both jake and samuel is peak comedy. the devil works hard and alexander works harder. if you're an a/c unit i'm your fan. number one samuel stan can't compare can't compete we aint shit compared to alexander.

also it's funny for me to think that while hyungseok was beating the shit out of everyone, himself included, everyone else was like trying to think about how to transport the rescues. jihan being the bright patootie he is brought a bed, work smarter not harder. alexander decided to brute-force it. jinsung used the bro-style-carry. vasco is now carrying lil hyungseok like he's a cat he just rescued out of a fire. these guys all share one single braincell and its bouncing like that old dvd logo. i hope that reference lands somewhere.

now what's important here.

i think this chapter pretty much confirmed that nº1 is, in fact, made up of parts and scraps of other generation kings. i mean this is pretty obvious but i guess it'll be confirmed in a couple more episodes and we'll have to be like -pretends to be shocked-, i think it will be more impressive if nº1 is not, as a matter of fact, made up of parts and scraps from the 0 gen and is instead made up of several random people and then enhanced by drugs. why do i say this? well usually the first is not the best, specially with experiments, and i really dont think they would have wanted to waste precious parts in order to make something that wouldn't work, so it could be very possible that nº1 is actually the first working prototype of what the workers first affiliate was trying to replicate.

and what were they trying to replicate you ask?

why, hyungseok's fake body, of course.

my working theory is as follows:

i think it's very likely that nº1 is an experiment that is being made behind charles back, by the workers first affiliate, because back in the day he somehow found a way, alongside jinyoung, to recreate the perfect super-soldier, and went around playing the world's worst puzzle and stealing pieces from others with the help of james lee, and now won't rely that information to workers so that they can get mass produced. however it seems like eugene doesn't know about the two bodies, or at least hasn't found a way to confirm it (maybe, hear me out, maybe if ptj hadn't killed jiho off! the shrimp the felony commiter the only one crazy enough to come up with that possibility! then eugene would already know and this plot would be so much far ahead!), therefore it remains as a possibility that he heard about some kind of super-soldier project and tried to find out who was behind it because super-soldiers are very high on the list of what evil little dudes do on their free time, and that's how he stumbled upon jinyoung.

jinyoung however, probably wasn't the entire brain behind the operation. that's why nº1 looks... that way. it's very possible that the other half of the operation was... hear me out: hyungseok's dad, who was supposedly killed by jinyoung.

i dont really think that it was james lee, because he's supposed to be the figthing genius, the one-man-army, the one going to the hardware store to collect the parts and pieces of their little fucked up science fair experiment that might or might not violate the geneva convention (is the geneva convention a thing in the ptj-verse i dont think it is...). i also don't think it was charles, because while he's behind the interconnected webs, that's kinda not in the same ballpark as human experimentation, that's like management vs the kitchen, have you seen management inside the kitchen like actually working? no, that's my point. gapryong was too busy trying to become the president in order to also be trying to bring back prometheus 2: electric boogaloo. which leaves us jinyoung, a farmacologist, and hyungseok's dad, occupation unknown but with ties to jinyoung, and was apparently killed by him as well.

even if jinyoung didn't actively murder him, you know what mom park said? he died sick. who in lookism would have the very specific knowledge to prescribe drugs that would worsen someone's condition instead of making it better, and also be in a position of trust in order to make it work, thus killing hyungseok's dad while making it seem like he simply fell ill?

oh yeah its coming all together.

i also find it extremely funny that, in a way, hyungseok did manage to both unite and dismantle the four major crews. all of the groups are dismantled, inactive, on the run or were absorbed by workers, and now three of the original crew leaders alongside samuel as a representative form a temporary alliance. "not even the four major crews-" bitch sit down didn't you read the big deal arc and the hostel arc, the power of trauma compels you -gets blasted-

also johan being like "ew cant believe i gotta fight alongside you people" kid you've been working with Jake for months now what on earth are you talking about did you also get your memory temporarily erased by the drugs. will anyone else forget about some important part of the plot-- put your hand down jake.

what you thought i wouldnt mention the emotional whiplash it gave me to have hyungseok suddenly remembering the friend he just beat up. JAEYEOL IT'S ME YA BOY bitch you left him about to board the first train without stopovers to the left of christ's throne a foot on the gutter and the other on the grave, wipe out those damn tears and get his ass outta there stop crying it's not the time stop kissing in the foreground

#lookism spoilers #lookism theory #lookism 471

[aviradasa]

I got you 🖤 to make this authentic I smoked a fat ass blunt just for you anyways I did the characters you requested plus a few extra and I decided to do small HC/ drabbles cause I have to many imagines atm 🤣 anyways also I added nuada from hellboy 2 cause he's pookie all the way @horny4bj-blog

Characters included:

Hellboy (2004)

Prince nuada ( hellboy 2, 2008)

Daryl (Alexandria timeline)

Sam (supernatural)

Dean (supernatural)

Castiel (supernatural

Lucifer (supernatural)

Let's get startedddd

Different characters react to you stoned/couch-logged

Hellboy:

Honestly was not surprised when he walked into him room one day to it smelling entirely of weed. Honestly he was mostly impressed because not only did it smell. But when the door opened all that came out was smoke.

Like damn.

When he went to venture further he was also not surprised when he saw you sprawled out on the couch with like 6 cats laying on you.

You didnt register him calling your name until he threw a candybar at your face

This is pretty much how it went

“Hey???” “…” “Hellooo??” “…” “Hey!” “Ow fuck what do you want.” you say as you open the candy bar and take a bite

Honestly he doesn't really care but he expects you to share you weed with him. If you don't he will lowkey just take it without asking and deal with you later. (no he won't pay you back hes always magically broke when you ask him to 😒)

As for you being on the couch he tells you to move over. If you don't he moves you himself.

He finds it funny to mess with you when you get to the point when you think everything is in slow motion And your basically not registering anything the way your supposed to

Like one time yall played Uno. And you were at the point you couldn't even read the cards and you were slumped over leaning on the back of the couch like a corpse thinkin the number 6 was the funniest shit on earth

And what did he do.convinced you to give him your cards so he could read them to you.in your state you agreed. That prick (this is based off a true story i have a lot of these adafia if you see this. Fuck you I should have one that game 🖕)

Yeah naw i dont have much for him he's just an asshole who also smokes so he don't really care yall end up watching a lot of movies though.

Nuada:

Now he's interesting with this idea lmao

He's confused as fuck cause he don't really do shit that could alter his mind, he want to stay sharp and ready for anything (boring fuckaaaa)

He at first acts like a disappointed mother

“ now why would you go and do this to yourself knowing what we have to do.” “because I'm a whole ass adult and it makes it more fun.” “that's besides the point (name)” part of a real argument yall had at one point

Yeah like don't get me wrong he doesn't hate weed he just thinks it makes you act dumb

He's lowkey right though

But anyways back to the prompt. When he walks in and your just spaces out in your bed he just shakes his head and goes to do what he needs to do.

If you are logged somewhere is his way this man with nudge/kick you with his foot until you move and if you don't he will just use his foot to roll you out of the way.

He acts like he doesn't care and to be frank he doesn't have the energy to put into caring about something so dumb so he leaves you alone.

But then there was the one time that he accidentally ate an edible.

He took that shit like a champ though and was able to function decently, but for the most part he was just chillin just silently staring off into space

He says he would never do that again. But you decide not to say anything when you notice some of your edibles missing.

Bro thinks he's slick 🤣🤣

Sam:

Ok gonna be honest his brother is dean. Need I say more

He knows what to do he pulls up with the munchies and some red box movie

If your slumped on the couch this man will sit on the floor

Y'all can talk for hours even if he is sober

Or you pass out from him typing on the computer cause I mean that sound is just relaxing.

Honestly don't have much for him he's just a chill guy

Dean:

He don't walk in

He's slumped with you on the other side of the couch

He eats all the damn munchies

He refuses to watch anything besides old Scooby doo reruns.

(he has a crush on the hex girls)

He's literally just a grown up child when he's high (not much different then normal)

Yall are laughing high people

The jokes are hilarious

Cass

He walks in and sees you on the couch looking half dead and he's confused

Like really confused

“Are you ok?” “huh?” are you ok??” “HUH??” “nevermind.”

He doesn't know what to do so he does nothing 😭😭

If you ask he will get you snacks

He's kinda hard to talk to so if you are laughing its at him not knowing anything

(these are getting short cause of my beautiful bong so its not my fault blame daisy that's my bongs name.)

Lucifer:

Ok let be honest here

He's lucifer he's hilarious

If you wanna feel like your gonna suffocate from laughing then he's your guy

He doesn't even try to be funny he just says out of pocket shit.

All the time

I haven't seen much of his character yet but he's already a favorite

I don't think he would light up with you unless you peer pressure him

Yes you have to peer pressurethe damn devil to smoke the devils lettuce with you.

If yall do he just spaces in and out while your on your phone on that couch unmoving

But during this spacing in and out he just says weird shit

I dare you to show him the dark crystal afterwords tho just trust me.

Daryl:

This man could not give less of a fuck

He's used to seeing people on all sorts of shit so some weed don't scare him

He just goes about his day

He will sit and chat with you

He's a horrible high sitter tho

If you get to high he's your worst nightmare

Will throw fake spiders and shit at you knowing your on that couch to see you jump

He's lowkey funny tho 🤣

He might smoke with you once in awhile

It's rare tho he's more of a drinker

Anyways that's all for today hope you enjoyed dis shitz

Edit: sorry I sounded like a fuckin idiot here also sorry I forgot Crowley and carol 😭😭 I wrote for nuada took a break forgot it was nuada and gaslit myself into thinking I wrote for Crowley 🤣🤣

didnt mean to but its really late and I'm to lazy to write for them rn so I hope you enjoy what I got down please forgive me🖤🖤 also sorry nuadas there you didnt ask for him I was just living it up with daisy at that moment.

#hellboy #prince nuada #sam winchester #dean winchester #castiel #lucifer supernatural #daryl dixon #mary #jane #devils #lettuce #girls who smoke weed #weedlife

[marygodwin-bsd]

Rating members of the ADA based on nothing but my own vibes (I haven't seen all of season 3)

I'll post a part 2 with the port mafia and a part 3 with the guild

Dazai Osamu

8/10 for looks. 4/10 for the chuuya abuse. 6/10 for the fact everytime i hear his english voice it reminds me of hendrickson from SDS bc that is the VA. overall 7/10 character but I would not wanna be his friend in real life. follow his instagram at most.

Kunikida Doppo

Y'ALL ALREADY KNOW hotness 10/10, 6/10 for the possible terrorist backstory that would be oh so fantastic character building, 8/10 for the fact i ALSO happen to be overly obsessed with my own schedule, 4/10 for the fact someone called his hair a deceased pikachu wig and I laughed, 7/10 for the fact his english VA is Griamore from sds and that was weird for a few scenes. OVERALL 9/10 solid gold good man deserves a white picket dream (the remaining 1/10 is for the fact they couldnt help themselves with his spiky hair sticking out, so now it is effectively a mullet instead of just long hair)

Rampo Edogawa

7/10 on looks in general i have no strong opinions about his ensemble except that he looks like a lil detective and the IRL Rampo wrote "Boy Detectives Club" and i think its adorable. 8/10 for the fact his brain is awesome and the cockiness. 7/10 for the rivalry with poe because i like it but i havent seen enough of it to be super into their thing yet overall 7/10 I dont have much to say hes just a good boy

Yosano Akiko

5/10 for the design im sorry i hate that the skirt is that low she can have a long skirt but it looks way awk at the hips though that may just be because the skirt goes out instead of just downward like a maxi. the gold hair clip is good i like it. 9/10 for the way she snatched that mans hand and almost took it off, 7/10 for the scenes that make this anime look way sus to my parents (YOU KNOW WHICH ONES I MEAN!) overall 8/10 for everything except that damn skirt

Kenji Miyazawa

Team baby!! 10/10 for team baby and YES hes the team baby even though kyouka is ALSO the team baby but i'll get to that. 8/10 for being Finny from Black Butler without my issues from black butler. 7/10 for his morals on cows. 8/10 for his everything about his personality. im not rating on attractiveness bc he is fourteen >:1 idk why i wasted y'alls time explaining hes 10/10 for team baby

Kyouka Izumi

Ok she was going to be the team baby but then i reevaluated and decided no shes just ATSUSHI'S BABY. 8/10 for how adorable her jellyfish cut is. 10/10 for sad backstory. 6/10 for the fact people ship her with atsushi and the show seems to lean that way as well (I was so happy when Lucy arrived for this reason). 7/10 overall for second team baby

Atsushi Nakajima

6/10 for the fact my phone always autocorrects him to At Sushi. 7/10 for that haircut. 10/10 for awful father figure. 9/10 for the headcannon about his parents engaging in cannibalism that sounded so in-line with the show i thought it was real and not a headcannon. I'm sorry 6/10 for the fact the va uses the same voice for atsushi that he uses for Harlequin in SDS and it trips me up. 8/10 for the fact his eyes cant decide what color to be. 7/10 for the fact it feels weird to see smut with him in it because he is also, effectively, team baby.

These two

This poor guy got NERFED by his own story bro this author wasn't into all this.... sister stuff... but apparently his book character was! Gimme a minute to yak anyways designs are 7/10 pretty basic but do their job effectively and Naomi's appearance actually supports the headcannon shes not real and shes just a product of his ability which i like. The sibling... "relationship" gets 0/10 for EW but kunikida gets 10/10 for telling atsushi to ignore it but then still yelling at them after he gets 7/10 for his general personality, honestly if his devotion to his sister wasnt related to the weird incest stuff i would find it a really great plot device (being devoted to protecting and taking care of your only family left) overall naomi gets 6/10 for being okay and looking properly suited for her environment unless shes around Junchiro Junchiro gets 8/10 for having a sick matrix ability and looking basic but not boring

Fukuzawa Yukichi

GOOD OL' CAT LOVING GRANDPA HIMSELF. 3/10 for the fact he knows mori, 10/10 for how he looks after everyone. also 7/10 for the fact im realizing how kunikidas hairstyle might be because he is COPYING FUKUZAWA... anyways. I don't personally find him all that attractive but to be fair he doesn't show up a lot? 8/10 for being a badass. 9/10 because I feel sad that he didnt get to pet the kitty in Wan. Overall, 8/10

Pt 2 will go here Pt 3 will go here pt 4 is here

#bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #dazai osamu #osamu dazai #bsd dazai #dazai bsd #doppo kunikida #kunikida doppo #bsd kunikida #kunikida bsd #bsd ranpo #bsd edogawa rampo #bsd rampo #ranpo edogawa #yosano akiko #bsd yosano #bsd kenji #kenji miyazawa #kyouka izumi #kyouka bsd #bsd atsushi #atsushi nakajima #anime #tanizaki junichirou #bsd tanizaki #bsd fukuzawa #president fukuzawa

[quodekash]

ITS TIME ITS TIME ITS FINALLY TIME EPISODE 12 IS HERE AAAAAA SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT im gonna cry so hard oh my FYUHVSBFOJKWVBEB

HOLY SHIT GUYNAWA ARE GOING TO KISS GUWOREHSDGPIOVBREDB okay okay I need to actually press play on the episode frick shit shit frick

oh yeah thats right, he got shot

I genuinely forgot

I LOVE HIS GOOFY LITTLE SMILE

OH NOOO IM ALREADY ABOUT TO CRY

I JUST LOVE HIM SO MUCH

PFFFFTASDHFJSDHFAHDFH

ALSO: PIMFAHHHHH

AAAAAAAA THEYRE ALL THERE THEYRE ALL THERE GHREBDFGHBREHFDKGB

FRIENDSHIP

I LOVE THEM

GERIODFGOVRIEJDPO

guy is looking at nawaaaa

HOLY FRICK I KEEP REMEMBERING THAT THEYRE LITERALLY GONNA KISS TODAY HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT

SEE??????

man that whole thing was very confusing BUT I KNEW IT WASNT SAIFAH

wait does that mean

does that mean saifah's gonna get out of jail, but name's gonna go to jail??

noooooooo

I wanted jail boyfriends

I was so hopeful for jail boyfriends

they were the fourth element

the fourth nation of the boyfriend nations: bathroom, rooftop, jail, pool

we can't have the four nations if there's no jail boyfriends!

HERE WE GO, FINALLY, WE GET A PROPER EXPLANATION

A FLASHBACK

WE GET THE REST OF THE BLOODY SCENE

y'all please tell me im not the only one thinking this feels like a breakup scene

HONESTLY SLAY

THAT WAS ICONIC

man that's a shit screenshot BUT KONG KNOCKED THE GUN AWAY AND SHOVED THE GUY TO THE GROUND THAT WAS UNEXPECTED AND TOTALLY AWESOME

SAIFAHHHHH

KORB KHUN KRAPPPP

NO IM ALREADY SOBBING AGAIN

GUOWJEBLKGNDOUES

THEYRE REPAIRING THEIR RELATIONSHIP

ONE STEP AT A TIME

noooooo he has to be alone in jail without his jail boyfrienddddd

nooooo

naurrrr

just let them be in love in jaillll

or also like. outside of jail. outside of jail works too

oh man my brain is gonna give me so many fits for these two and I will write none of them probably

I may do dot point fics like I do with guynawa tho, who knows

IS THIS NOT THE GAYEST SHIT???

IM LAUGHING SO HARD AND IM SORRY FOR LAUGHING BUT ITS SO FUNNY TO ME

I AM ONCE AGAIN SOBBING

THEYRE REUNITED WITH THEIR FAMILY

AKA EACH OTHER BECAUSE THEYRE LITERALLY ALL THAT THEY HAVE LEFT OF THEIR FAMILY (which btw they never fully went into the backstory of why their parents are dead, unless my memory is just being a shithole and they actually did explain this at some point but I feel like I would remember if they did)

BABES

HONEYBUN

MY BOY

I- idk what to say

I just want to hug him

he needs a hug

EVERY SINGLE SCENE GIVES ME SOMETHING NEW TO CRY ABOUT

THATS ADORABLE

OH MY GOSH

I LOVE IT SO MUCH

I mean if it were me I would be mortified

but its not me (omg not me like the show) so I can appreciate it for how freaking ADORABLE it is

omg is it saifahname time

IT'S SAFIAH NAME TIME BABEYYYYY

kiss through the bars, kiss through the bars, kiss through the bars

LITERALLY EVERY SINGLE SCENE

EVERY SINGLE SCENE IT MAKES ME CRY AGAIN

BECAUSE NAME LOVES SUPERHEROES

AND- AND HE- AND- GVERIUJHSGDPOVIERBJNDGPIOVLKRENDFO

WHY DID HE HAVE TO SAY ONE OF THE MOST BITTERSWEET LINES IN THE EXISTENCE OF THE WORLD

I HATE THIS SO MUCH

PI4LKRNGPO3I4KLEBRNGIOLK4VENR

WHAT THE HELL MAN

ITS LIKE MY TEARS ARE CURRENCY OR SOMETHING BECAUSE YOU REALLY WANT ME TO CRY

I mean. sure, okay, thats fine

I love them too much to care whether their relationship is romantic or platonic

BRO, THE WAY THAT YOU LOOK AT HIM-

sorry, sorry, I know I literally just said I dont care if theyre romantic or platonic

B R O

THATS GAY AS HELL WHAT DO YOU MEAN "BEST BUDS"?????

NEXT BREAK???

AH SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT

#quodekash disregards sleep because of dangerous romance #dangerous romance #dangerous romance series #dangerous romance the series #kangsailom #sailomkang #saifahname #namesaifah #guynawa #nawaguy

[spicytrashthe1st]

Obey me boys "i beg to differ" "then beg"

Lucifer

"I beg to differ"

U fool. U absolute buffoon. He realises what his said too late. By the look on his face he already knows what ur gonna say but is still irritated when u say "then beg". Will walk away from u, is 100% done w ur shit.

"Then beg"

He says it w so much sex in his voice that u cant not be flustered. If u cant recover feel free to retreat, if Mc.exe comes back online climb into that bitches lap n whine a "please". He'll break, trust me.

Mammon

"I beg to differ"

We all love to make Mam's beg, he's just so cute when he does it. Considerin he says this in front of his bros the poor boy doesnt see it comin. So when u say "then beg" he freezes, full body blush like hes a kettle ready to boil before yeetin himself out the room. Congrats, uv broken him, better go after him before he runs into a wall.

"Then beg"

He's so smug when he says this its too cute. Like full on hands on hips bendin down to ur level smiling all the way.

Dont back down. Dont u dare back down.

Sensually grasp the sides of his face, only leave an inch between ya n say "oh great mammon, would u please". Break him.

Leviathan

"I beg to differ"

Big regrettie spaghetti as soon as he says it. He waits for ur response but it never comes so he looks up at u. Big mistake. He gulps at ur wicked grin. "Then beg" n oh boy does he.

"Then beg"

Y'all r in full fanboy discourse mode so he says it w such conviction. Naw, look at ur boy bein so confident. Take a picture, itll last longer, especially since ur gonna wipe it of in a second. Go all out. Crawl into his lap n go full anime gurl w a "Leviachan, please, please, pretty please?". Get the smellin salts, u just k.o'ed this boy.

Satan

"I beg to differ"

U respond w "then beg" without even thinkin about it. U both blink at each other like 'did that really just happen?'. Then this shithead gets that demure smile on his face n u know ur fucked. The way this man says please leaves ur entire being tingling.

"Then beg"

Smug bastard tm. U cannot visibly break his resolve, however, blush stained cheeks r still a win.

Asmodeus

"I beg to differ"

He's waitin for u to say "then beg" like a dog lookin at a nice jucy steak. Will u give in?

"Then beg"

Doesnt really expect u to beg, but that just means that u can do a sneak attack. Fluster the avatar of lust at ur own risk.

Beelzebub

"I beg to differ"

He looks confused when u ask him to beg. He does the dogo head tilt n u have to tackle hug him. Mission failed, we'll get 'em next time.

"Then beg"

Gotta be honest, i dont see him sayin this unless in jest. That bein said, he did ask.

Belphegor

"I beg to differ"

Gettin brat boy to beg is harder than tryin to get Luci to sleep at a reasonable time. Most of the time he'll scoff at u. But on a rare day he'll get all sly n rub himself against u like a cat, lookin up at u w those eyes that make u horni grip before sayin please.

"Then beg"

Never beg this man. Ur better than this.

Make this brat pay for his insolence.

Diavolo

"I beg to differ"

He doesnt know. I always see Dia as both oblivious n in the know at the same time. It shows when u ask him to beg. Like a light bulb goin off in his head he looks at u w such smolder u almost regret sayin it, almost.

Dia begs either like a dog wanting to go for a walk or a brat. He begs like a brat this time. Pound his ass, its what he deserves.

[Im changin Dia's status from baby boy to bothe brat n baby boy, it has been decided]

"Then beg"

Bratty behaviour engaged, tread carefully soldier. To defuse do so cutely, he become a fit of giggles. If u wish to escalate be prepared to back ur shit up.

Barbatos

"I beg to differ"

Homie. Brother. Senpai. Look at me.

If u ask this man to beg u r unleashing a beast that could destroy us all.

So do it anyway!

Honestly gettin this man to break his whole butler shtick is a challenge, but a challenge worth doin. Im just warnin ya that the amount of horni ur about to unleash is uhh...well itll be somthin else, lets just leave it at that.

"Then beg"

Please leave it cute.

Leave the horni outta the kitchen.

Simeon

"I beg to differ"

He knows. The fucker knows exactly what he's doin. Will act all innocent but theres that look in his eyes that screams otherwise.

[Is...is Simeon a brat? 🤔]

"Then beg"

Would u beg for this angel man?

Do u think he'll show his tru intent if u do?

Solomon

"I beg to differ"

Is this wizard boy even capable of beggin? Only one way to find out! He'll do it if he thinks it'll fluster u.

"Then beg"

Dont let him, never let him win. Cake that shit on when u say "oh my beloved king". Or flip it on its head, how dare he tell u to beg, put him in his place.

[This post has been updated to reflect my findings after makin this post]

#obey me headcanons #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #obey me solomon #obey me brain rot #obey me

[silverrstarrr]

◇Headcanons of modern AU of Eren.

Warning: weed, drugs, nsfw(this comes when he hit high-school/university)

Primary school-Middle school ‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

• Im sorry but Eren seems like the kid who was musty as hell.

• The kids around him would ask, "who's musty bro?" And then they'll sniff everyone and say its Eren. But I mean, they're only kids and they're not so big on hygiene.

• When people would accused him of being the one who's musty, he'll be so pissed off and get defensive. "what the HELL?! I'm not the one who stinks.😡"  just imagine how aggressive he sounds.

• Eren later on realizes he stinks and doesn't want to be made fun- starts putting on deodorant, yk yk.

• In middle school, he was pretty popular but he didn't know it. Despite his little anger issues at times, he's really sweet and outgoing and pleaseee don't get me started on his little smileeee. Most likely girls fell for his smile.

• Most likely he used to the term "the boys 🥶❗🤙" during middle school as well 😭 Especially when like girls wanted to hang out with him or he'll tell his mom this when she wanted him to do something.

• He really liked hanging out with Mikasa and Armin. I feel as if they would go to parks and find things, bugs, watch animals etc. Mikasa would tag along as a supervisor lmao.

OKAY TIME FOR HIGH SCHOOL EREN

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

• During his freshman year, he was not popular at all. I feel as if he stayed with Mikasa and Armin a lot- he didn't really talk to a lot of people. Cause yk, freshman new people new things but Jean and the others(I feel like Connie and sasha would be popular for being stupid asf 😭)  kinda got them popular

• Later on he gets really popular and a bunch of girls start talking to him. I feel as if he's a flirt but doesn't realize it until he sees you all flustered or smiling a lot.

• Most definitely he started smoking in his Junior year of high school.

• Eren would smoke weed, vape, hit blunts, I don't think he's the type to eat edibles a lot. But maybe there's a test, he'll pop one right before. He would do gravity bings blunts and glass bongs and he would roll his blunts himself and occasionally buy them wrapped.Most people knows he smokes. He's not the best with keeping it down-low, especially when he's smoking with Jean.

• His smoke circle? Most definitely, Jean, Connie, Reiner, Annie, and Armin. Mikasa would just be there yk.

• Eren is greedy with his weed, it depends on the person for him to share. Most likely he'll share with you ;)

• Eren most DEFINITELY flirts with you when he's high, he'll get really close to your face and would be smiling like an idiot- flattering you with compliments.

• Jean finds this annoying and would flirt with you before Eren could(just to piss him off).

• If you're a beginner, he'll purposely give you a fat ass blunt and laugh his ass while he sees you cough for 5 minutes.

• OR he'll give you an edible(that has a high dosage) and watch you complain about it not hitting. "Eren, are you sure this works? I don't rea—" bam it hits and you end up tripping up the stairs while eren is just Busting up laughing cause he's high asf too.

• Maybe you're experienced? Eren would smoke with you alllll the time. Or he'll invite you to smoke with Armin and them.

• He blows smoke in your face.

• He's the type of get horny when he smokes, so he may get touchy with you. But doesn't get any further cause, I mean PEOPLE ARE AROUND?? LOOL.

UNIVERSITY EREN.

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

• Still smokes. I forgot to mention this but I dont think Eren is that smart? Don't get me wrong, when he puts his mind to it- work hard, he can get things done and pretty well. But he doesn't get things right on the first try/time like Armin and Mikasa does. He'll need a little bit more explaining to.

• Some how got into the same university with the rest of the gang

• HE GOES TO PARTIESSS, LIKE PARTIESSS.

• He's not a light drinker but I feel as if he'll be too busy making out with girls than putting his lips on a red cup, drinking up.

• Most of the time, he'll approach you if he never seen you before. Or maybe he's seen you once or twice on campus and wants to slide in ykk.

• When you guys meet, most likely he's slightly high.

• You guys hit off automatically, he's just naturally charming and he's attractive.

• Maybe after when you guys get to know each other more, he'll ask to come over to your dorm.

• This can 1 or 2 ways, y'all just have fun or you guys make out and fuck.

• Half of the time when he comes over, he' smoking in your dorm.  Of course he asks if he cans but you allow him to.

• As I said before, when he's high- he's hella touchy and horny. So be prepare for him coming up behind you, grabbing your waist and kissing all over your neck. Leaving small hickies here and there.

• He most definitely convinced you to get LD lights.

• Eren thinks it sets the mood and plus he likes it when he smokes(most likely they're on red duhh).

• He also plays music in the back as he's smoking in your room. It's not too loud, you guys are able to hear each other talk at least. (He'll play chill RnB, or chase Atlantic, blackbear, Brent faiyaz, Travis Scott, Don Tolliver. But I see him listening to chase Atlantic mostly. )

• Depends on if you smoke or not, Eren would make out with you with smoke in his mouth. He thinks its hot and it is

• Eren would like for you to sit on his lap, (facing him or not)

• His hand slips under your shirt and start playing with your breasts. In response you start grinding against his cock, which he'll end up moaning in your ear and BOOYYY WOULD THAT GET YOU HYPED UP.

• 9/10 you'll end up topping him because he gets needy.

• When he's coming down from his high, he wants to cuddle with you or have your fingers running through his hair. He'll get bitchy if you stop.

SORRY IF THIS IS SO LONG, I LOVE THIS MAN TOO MUCH.

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

Bonus:

• You know how LD lights bring in bugs right? You'll be yelling for him to kill it and he does but what he does next?😭 he'll grab a tissue clean it up the corpse and chase you around with the dead bug.

• for me, I know my ass would run and be yelling for him to stop and most likely he'll mock you: "eren stooopp"

#eren smut #eren x reader #eren jeager x reader #eren headcanons #hobo eren #eren aot #x reader #eren yeager #eren yeager x reader #eren yeager x you #headcanon #fanfic

[zozophoenixxx]

Serotonin Booster :D 🐉

How to train your dragon edition

Here are some things I had forgotten or little details I just noticed on my rewatch, maybe even Unpopular Opinions 🤭👀

✨Race to the Edge✨

SEASON 6

I love how the twins were basically the reason Hiccup figured out that Johan was the spy

NOOO THE WAY GOTHI WENT TO TRY AND STOP STOICK FROM THROWING AWAY HER MEDICINE AND THEN GOT THROWN OFF THE CLIFF WAS SO FUNNY [ep2]

Omg that fight between Hiccup and Stoick in ep2 was crazy whenever Stoick said "I'm talking to the expert in getting duped by Trader Johan" and THEN HICCUP WAS LIKE "but I was only duped for half as long as you were. So what does that make you?"

Awww the way both Toothless and Skull-crusher were trying to get them to talk

And also Astrid being the only one that wasn't caught by the Hunters right away, she's just superior bro

I love how both of them were right - Stoick was right to not trust the merchants and Hiccup was right about Johan's plan

Toothless is actually so strong like he's not only agile and clever, I mean he just flew up to the ballista and crashed against it and destroyed it without using his Plasma Blast 😎🤩

Mala and Dagur fighting over where the Dragon Eye lenses are gonna be hidden is hilarious. Mala is so calm I love it

I got chills when Atali was like "no, Hiccup, this is my island I will defend it"

I really want to know the origin of the Wingmaidens, like where did all these women come from? How come they're still there?

I love Minden and Snotlout's relationship, the way he tried to convince her to not give up AND SHE KISSED HIM!!!

Krogan's Singetail actually cares about him

Never gonna get over Adelaide Kane voicing Mala

Also Snotlout running when the dude had the razorwhip on him LIKE HE WAS LITERALLY FLYING AND HE WAS STILL RUNNING Y'ALL HAVE TO WATCH THAT SCENE I JUST DONT KNOW HOW TO DESCRIBE IT ITS IN EP3

Generations ago Fishlegs's ancestors were dragon hunters

The Loyal Order of Ingerman - decimated the Dramillion dragons, pushing them to the brink of extinction

Grump is amazing I love him

Dramillions - have both a lava blast and a magnesium blast. Omnivores. Still being hunted.

The Hunters were founded by Ingar Ingerman

The Dramillion trying to take the manacle off his tail🥺

And when Fishlegs threw his helmet and THEN THE HAND THING 😭🥺

I love the Dramillions they're so smart they learned how to get rid of the manacles by just looking at what Meatlug and Stormfly were doing 🥺

I just realized that the twins are 19 AND I FIND THAT ABSOLUTELY CRAZY HOW CAN THEY BE THAT OLD

I really wish we knew each of their birthdays like I wanna know which one's older and which one's younger

I feel like for some reason the twins would be the oldest ones then Fishlegs then Astrid then Snotlout and lastly Hiccup. Idk I'm still iffy on this

Most Thorstons don't make it to 19

I love the twins' relationship, they love each other so much that they would rather be alone and not form part of a clan than leave each other alone and the fact that other people know this too? Plsss like the only reason Gruffnut got them back into the fake induction trials was by telling them how bad it'd be for each other to not be part of a clan.

Titanwing Zippleback HOW DO THEY KNOW ITS A TITANWING IT LOOKS THE SAME AS THE OTHER ZIPPLEBACKS

"Ughh, what's the point of winning alone? Being a Thorston means nothing without him. We are one Thorston."

I love them and also technically Ruffnut won the induction trials.

THE LAST LENSE GOSH

Love how Fishlegs cares about global warming

I'm all Snotlout, Toothless and the Triple Stryke reacting to Mala and Dagur- I'm also Mala whenever someone tickles me I'LL KILL U

UGHHH I HATE HOW SNOTLOUT MADE HICCSTRID UNCOMFY FOR HAVING A DIFFERENT RELATIONSHIP

Astrid overthinking 🥺😭

"How would you like your yak cooked?" JSHDHHA

bro I love how both Tuff and Toothless noticed the betrothal necklace

"So want to deliver some scrap metal?" Hiccup baby? Why are you so oblivious?

At least he asked her if she was alright in the armorwing's island 😩

No but if I was Astrid I'd be pissed too, the dude saw a dragon eye lens from far way and didn't notice her betrothal necklace? 🙂😤

No I can't that scene was too harsh to watch, I mean I loved to see Hiccup noticing something was wrong with Astrid but then the way Astrid compared their relationship to Mala and Dagur's and then threw him the betrothal necklace... And the way he caught it too I can't- 😭😞😖😭😓🤧

Seeing the twins trying to capture Mala was hilarious JAHDHDHHSHA

I love how when they're fighting Astrid's still there for him whenever he's expected to have all the answers. She ignored her anger and went over to him and grabbed his hand and that single thing was what gave him confidence in a moment of panic 🥺

"I'm with you"

"I know"

That final Hiccstrid scene in Mi Amore Wing was just too perfect, we have Hiccup grabbing Astrid's hand to bring her outside and talk to her, the sunset in the background, every little thing Hiccup told her about being there for her and loving her with everything he had and that he should've noticed the necklace right away AND THEN THAT KISS WAS JUST AMAZING❗️❗️❗️ it was passionate and sweet and Astrid was blushing and then Fishlegs was all uncomfortable and Mala was like "okaaayyyyy😏" and Dagur like "alrighhtttt👌🏼" ig the only thing I didn't like is that Astrid didn't say I love you back 😭 but it's ok cause yk she does I just wished she had said it.

Baby razorwhips love the water

Tuffnut named the baby razorwhip that bonded with Ruffnut, Wingnutt

Top scenes of Ruff Transition ep7

Tuffnut throwing up in Ruffnut's mouth and Ruffnut throwing up in Wingnutt's mouth just do that he could be fed- seeing the windmaiden's reactions is the best lmao

Hiccup trying to teach Ruffnut how to fly (with his dragon flight suit) and then Ruffnut losing balance but Hiccup helping her regain it BUT we still get overprotective Tuffnut jumping off of Toothless to try and help but all he did was make things worse HIS SCREAM WAS HILARIOUS nonono and the way Toothless tried to help BUT AGAIN MADE THINGS WORSE 😩😮‍💨😂

Ruffnut finally figuring out how to connect with Wingnutt and fighting the dragon hunters and saving Atali was so badass and then Atali riding Barf 😭🤩

Hiccstrid kiss count (approximately) : 6😘

The way he slightly and carefully touches her face to reassure her that he'll be fine

The Singetail's only predator is the Skrill

The Berserkers used to use metal daggers to lure Skrills into traps. The dragon is drawn to it due to its electrical properties

VIGGO JUST DID THE HAND THING THING WITH THE SKRILL WTF

If I could have any dragon it'd be in this order

Skrill - it's so badass and powerful

Nightfury - it's badass, powerful, pretty, strong and fast

Deadly Nadder - it's extremely fast and agile, has multiple attacks and the spikes

Dramillion - has multiple attacks and is very smart

Just realized that ep8 is called Triple Cross because 1st Johan crossed Viggo 2nd Viggo fake crossed Hiccup and 3rd Viggo and Hiccup crossed Johan and Kogan

That episode was basically jusr to show Viggo's arc and the way he changed for the better and learned to respect dragons

That's why the Singetails wouldn't leave in ep9 whenever they were trying tp free the Deathsong- their eggs! They're in that island.

I can't with Hiccup and Astrid sitting together just chilling but with Astrid feeling guilty and Hiccup assuring her that he was also at fault 😭

I love Narrator/Author Snotlout! The titles of the chapters of his book remind me of the ones from Pjo

Stoick and Skullcrusher acting as 1 and being worried about each other 🥺 I love their relationship

Also the way Stoick bats off the shots from the Singetails with his axe just like Astrid. They're both truly warriors

No but Toothless asking for a head scratch from Gobber bc he's worried abt both Hiccup and Stoick🥺

The way Toothless tried to make Hiccup feel better- I mean the man blamed himself for putting Stoick in "his deathbed" it was just so awful seeing Hiccup in that state and the way everyone was trying to make him feel better but it was ultimately Astrid who managed to get through to him😭

I love it when they put scenes of the movies

I love how Astrid always knows what to say without lying

Looks like it's you and me, then.

Always... was that corny or-

Probably. Nice, though.

The way Astrid is so natural at being a leader and putting everyone on their places 🤩

That lil moment they had in ep12 where he holds her face and thanks her for everything and I just love them too much 😭

I love how Spitelout is so happy when he's beating ass, this dude literally goes "I'm sure I've had more fun than this. But at the moment, I can't remember when"

Have I mentioned I love the Dramillions before? I love them way too much they're amazing and the sound they make is so 😩 I love it

The Dramillion is a distant cousin of the Changewing which means the Titanwing Dramillion shares the de-cloaking ability with its subspecies.

Stormfly's spine clone was literally so badass, my girl was surrounded and she finished every single dragon flyer with it. Badass move. Wish we had seen it more throughout the series

It really pissed me off that Hiccup had to choose between getting Tuff, Ruff and Snotlout out of that sinking ship when he could've been following Krogan. Like ofc it was the right decision but that wouldn't have happened if the twins and Snotlout didn't follow Gruff into the ship :/

I love how strong Barf and Belch are! They literally carried the a Titanwing Dramillion on their own.

That scene when they figured out that the Titanwing Dramillion is not the King of Dragons but instead the last piece of the puzzle to get to the King of Dragons

When the Wingmaidens got to the battle it was amazing

Also the way Dagur was so proud that the King of Dragons was a Berserker and how Ruff was so excited to see Wingnutt and Snotlout to see Minden🥺

THEY REALIZED THAT BBYS AREN'T AFFECTED BY THE KING OF DRAGONS BC OF THE BABY RAZORWHIPS

that last Hiccstrid Scene where Hiccup is worried about Astrid's safety- I mean his face 🥺🥺🥺 and she told him that his dad would be proud and that she's proud too and when she was about to leave he held her back and kissed her 😭😭

Ik I said this before but I simp for Astrid as a leader, she's just so natural at it

Also I love how the King of Dragons has ice powers instead of fire

WAIT SO IS THE EGG THAT HICCUP FINDS IN THE FINALE THAT THEY GIVE TO VALKA IS THAT THE KING OF DRAGONS THAT VALKA CARES FOR IN HTTYD2?!!

Valka being friends with the Wingmaidens sits absoluteky right with me

no but the way Toothless hesitated when Hiccup told him to leave him and get the egg

I love how all the dragons arrived to fight the dragon flyers, it was just so poetical to me, the dragons finally getting to fight the people that hurt them 🤩

I FINISHED IT AND NOW I'M SAD!!! I loved the end tho and I'm glad we got to see Shattermaster at Dagur's wedding, also Astrid's outfit change- we love that. And them leaving the edge is just so sad bro 😭but I love how we got to see some "insight" ig u could call it on HTTYD2 😭 also seeing Snotlout and Fishlegs's love for Ruffnut start forming was hilarious

#httyd #how to train your dragon #dob #defenders of berk #riders of berk #rob #race to the edge #rtte #hiccstrid #hiccup haddock #astrid hofferson #hiccup x astrid #fishlegs #snotlout #toothless #ruff and tuff #ruffnut #tuffnut #dagur the deranged #queen mala #Wingmaidens #Heather #Stoick #Valka #the King of Dragons

[athys-obelia]

honestly god BLESS everyone who peer pressured me into starting 'the way to protect the female lead's brother' bc jfc it is so good i might actually cry????? the plot is interesting but tbh i was mostly reading it for how well developed all the relationships were?? agriche black is a madhouse, everyone introduced is worse than the last and just fucking unhinged, i'm loving every second of it

*uhhh kinda sorta spoilers ahead but not really*

he's not a good person yes ok moving on - a puppy?? all i see is a pup. reminds me of (certain aspects of his personality yes but also literally the hair n his eyes lmfaooo) cabel + lucas in all the best ways? yes. yes.

can you honestly look me in the eye n say you didn't think Count Dracula™ when you first saw this man?? dark, messed up, has the cape + the money, for all we know he could be sleeping in coffins at night ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ major sugar daddy vibes but might fuck around n accidently kill u idk

Y'ALL SEND HELP??????? !!!!!

I DONT KNOW HOW WHAT TO THINK WHEN IT COMES TO THIS MAN - literally at first he goes "i'm only interested in cassius bc you are" to roxie so i was like hot protective eldest bro?? yes please.

but like. the way he switched up after that,,,I GOT WHIPLASH. "i like seeing u cry" headass wtf is wrong with you?? well i mean when the guy has daddy and mommy and sister issues- what i wanna say is count drac really needs to keep it in his pants but his kids are all beautiful so i GUESS it balances out?

again tho, same crisis, if he Bad then why nice arms? why pretty?

FIRST OF ALL HES SO COCKY IN FRONT OF EVERYONE ELSE BUT JUST,,,FLIPS THE SUB SWITCH W ROXIE??????

but the way mans got brother zoned so bad in the beginning 😭😭 y'all could TELL he was like pretty girl -> brother? hell naw. like yes i deadass felt his pain through the screen 😌.

did you guys also spontaneously combust when roxie showed him the poisonous flowers n he was so aggressive trying to get her away from them? or are you normal.

another major crisis: yes i simp but for which one of them??????

roxie reminds me so much of aria and oh my god that is just the most gorgeous duo there can ever be,,you have the right to your opinion butttt if your opinion isn't this one then it's wrong ✌️😙 sorry i don't make the rules

also the scene from the last pic,,i may never be able to look at kiel the same way ever again whoopsies haha

@price-is-not-right used the words 'dark and delicious' to describe this manhwa and it can't get more accurate than that?? i shit you not this art can seduce me. the plot is super cool but i am reading it for the art and the agriche and that's on that.

thank you for coming to my ted talk n have a lovely day / night folks <3

#ahem excuse me #this art actually gives me life #that and dion's thighs oop #he's really bad but also a full course meal i- #where is the justice #roxanne agriche #cassis pedelian #kassius pedelian #cassius pedelian #ooooh the old name struggle #love that #dion agriche #lucabel agriche #ahh shit my bad #jeremy agriche* #lant agriche #if my name was lant i'd wanna kill a bunch of ppl too lowkey #the way to protecc <33

[batarangsoundsdumb]

yet another ask dump yeehaw!

do you ever think that jay's mother was one of those bitch who believes in horoscope and tarots and things like that and so he believes in these things too, or it is just me projecting?

sheila haywood took one look at jason's birthchart said 'nah this won't do' and left.

Wait, but what happens when the justice league does find out that Bruce and John fucked? Lmao it sounds like it would be hilarious, really, I don’t want a justice league that doesn’t make fun of Bruce for like his entire life.

barry runs out of the meeting immediately and comes back with an entire sti testing kit. diana fully seriously wants bruce to get tested while bruce is sitting there like 'come on guys, you're being ridiculous, i already checked twice'

john is standing in the corner clearly offended while bruce is just like 'don't even say anything, constantine, you fucked a shark'

tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.

on the one hand, good for him, on the other hand, bro, how do you still have a secret identity when your superhero name is just your last name,,,,

Your fic on ao3 was GOLD PLEASE CONTINUE I loved Dinah's cameo btw ( @purple-vixen

thanks so much! i already continued but this ask is like 10 years old because i'm a notorious procrastinator (also yes! i love dinah so much aahhhhhhhhhhhh)

I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.

bruce internally: holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit holy fuck holy shit bruce externally: get out of my city, alien

AHHH ur multimedia fic is the only thing that brings me happiness anymore continue it forever pls

uhh thanks, but can't continue it forever because my attention span is that of a toddler on crack on a good day and i can't function without at least 10 things going on at the same time and music in the background

Oi, so I'm getting into dc and watching batman the animated series, and they use fruitcake a lot. Which I thought was very funny and wanted to share w you - Denilla

wait like fruitcake (food) or fruitcake (derogatory) ?

young justice 🤝 teen titans slut shaming batman

tim drake and dick grayson to their respective teams 'you guys stop it, that's my dad'

Happyhoganon: If an eighty year old Batman had fought crime in Gotham City for decades and the only threats to him and the city lately are a wheel chair bounded Penguin, your usual purse snatchers and a few con artists popping up every now and then, how well could the Dark Knight do in maintaining the peace in Gotham despite him being just somewhat fit to do that as an elderly man (which says A LOT given how old he is)

uhh he'll probably do what my grandpa does and that is ruthlessly prank them until they die of shame.

in the death in the family interactive movie there's an ending where Jason is tasked with raising Damian and he decides he's gonna raise Damian to take down the waynes and al ghuls which uh maybe isn't great BUT the idea of Jason raising Damian... PRICELESS. CHAOTIC. I just need more people to know about this :)

yes i saw that wow holy shit but jason would accidentally drop damian on his head one (1) hour in and jason just yeets him into the lazarus pit.

Headcanon: The Penguin has a really hard time fighting any of the Robins because of his avian obsession means there's always a small part of his mind that's like "Birb. Child. Protect" ( @subspacecadet )

as soon as dick becomes nightwing the penguin is like 'you know what, fuck this dude' and shoots at him.

Y'all talking about King Shark dating Constantine, let's not forget about John literally hooking up with Satan

listen there's a clear difference between monsterfucker and satanfucker in that king shark is literally a shark and satan still looks like a normal dude

Does everyone in Gotham think Batman is a teen dad?

everyone in gotham thinks batman has been around since gotham was founded, but they do think that bruce wayne is actually a teen father and dick grayson's biological dad.

why. why would you do that fancast when you know it will only hurt people

what? i loved my fancast it was really well done. i did it with good representation in mind and i really managed that with alfred pennyworth being ✨italian✨

Seeing james charles a jason gave me psychic damage how dare you i need to wash my eyes

well that's a you problem isn't it?

do you think dick grayson thirst tweets about nightwing just to annoy his family/cause problems on purpose in general?

he thinks nightwing is hot, next question.

holy jiminy cricket batman, its as cold as the good lords ass crack in here!!

i- what? this is why i don't fuck with english expressions it's way too goddamn weird

Brooooooo, your teen dad!Bruce au is soooo good. I've got brainrot.

Honestly if you ever write anymore, I'd read that shit twice. Sign me the fuck up. Good stuff, Good Stuff.

uh yeah i'm thinking about writing a fic, but i have exams coming up and i don't wanna fail because that would suck. but after i'll certainly be writing more tho

your teen dad AU is so great! bruce acting like a big brother for all of like a week before he's telling everyone about his son. what if in the AU dick meets the JL because they need to rescue him? maybe he's in trouble/kidnapped at a gala and bruce starts calling for JL. clark finds him and has to fly with dick to bring him home - that's how dick and clark meet and superman becomes dick's fave hero. he goes around the manor thinking he can fly with a red blanket draped around him like a cape.

actually- if you want a young dad! bruce fic with like that kinda stuff(just with damian) go check uhh- in for a penny by cdelphiki. it's really good and bruce is like 24/25-ish. (and dick's there!!!)

This account has solely convinced me that Tim is a trash goblin ( @hamilcat-and-magic-turtle )

because he is. that boy has slept in dumpsters on multiple occasions even if he is the son of a billionaire.

Okay but when you said victory dance I did think of the whole justice league defeating the big bad and then they all start flossing

well that's exactly what hal jordan does and that's why batman uses a gun now. no but the victory dance in my opinion is like the 'we're all in this together' dance from high school musical.

The horrors in Invincible s1 was nothing compared to the comics, I cant wait for s2

oh well okay, i mean i personally react to horror and violence by laughing awkwardly so i can't wait to be called a monster for accidentally laughing at a mass murder.

I'm currently watching Batman: The Brave and The Bold and- Bruce is just talking about Oliver like he's an old love (@nightwings-kid)

okay im going to watch that lmao that's totally and completely in character for him tho.

The invincible comic is like super gratuitous with its violence so much so I'm shocked the show was able to adapt it in a faithful way! Anyway had the show been live action it absolutely wouldn't have the same impact as it does as an animated show and I'm so glad so many people agree with me on that

also because a live action casting would've been like uhh amanda stenberg for amber, the dude- the guy from the supernatural but with a mustache for omni-man, and scarlet johanssen for debbie grayson

Debbie grayson is a milf, yes. You're welcome for the invincible propoganda, now you can questions your life. Bruce def seems like the perfect father next to Omni-man. Like they really took a rip off justice league and I was like well, now I'm attached even tho I was like hah I know who they're supposed to be. And then bam- death gore death gore gore gore sad Mark grayson just had to have daddy issues. Why does every character have daddy issues. I'm sick of the attacks

because daddy issues make a person arguably funnier, that's why i'm not even remotely funny (haha good dad flex). i liked that it was dark contextually, but not in the colouring, bc i hate when it's like 'uh yeah graphic murder and now a shot so dark you have to sit in a dark room and squint at the screen to faintly see the characters. (like dcau ugh)

About the Wayne insurance, for a moment I thought you would put the video with moans over the waves.

i mean- i could've done that, but rick rolling seemed more family friendly.

Its the first time in forever that im surpise rickrolled, i usually expect it. Congratulations (i really should know better this is tumblr)

i get rickrolled so often but i actually like the song so i dont really give a fuck

Actually, my information about Damian and John's kids is outdated because it was revealed that the old men telling the kids stories about the Supersons were actually Jon and Damian the whole time. I was blinded by my thirst for Grandpa!Bruce Wayne but I was wrong... I liked my version better, tbh (@artemisa97)

fair enough. but i'd honestly like to see damian and jon getting together, just because it's a really fun dynamic and their friendship was really cute when they were kids. (also idk maybe it would be nice to have one (1) main batfam/superfam character that's not cishet)

How am i JUST finding your blog skdskfkd you're so fucking funny and ur takes are hot

i thought u were calling me hot :( but youre not :( crime detected (but lmao thanks)

So I have depression and I swear that your memes are one of the few things that have made me laugh so thank you 💛🥺 (@katekanebadass)

aw you're welcome, and i hope you're doing okay!

The metropolis memes are so funny, I love them 💀😌

i think metropolis is also so fucking funny it deserves more attention imagine having your entire police force being upstaged by an alien from kansas and his kids

as an american i feel your complete lack of knowledge of us geography is just so sexy (platonic) ❤️

thanks so much (i also don't know any other geography, i'm not kidding, like you can tell me you're from hungary and it will just blank, there will be nothing that comes to mind)

In the DC universe they don't say "Can't have shit in Detroit" they say "Can't have shit in Gotham"

this just reminds me of that guy whose porch got stolen like the steps to his door, and i'm thinking of people living in gotham and waking up without a front door and going "can't have shit in gotham"

honestly all i know about chicago is the bean, so. what would gotham's famous sculpture be?

gigantic gargoyle statue in front of one of the police precincts because a villain thought it was a smart way to keep the police inside, but it's too heavy to move.

why tf do people go on about how batman "works alone" or how he's the "lone wolf" when he like 38290202 members in his family

bc people think it's cool that a grown man in his 30s has no friends or family instead of calling it what it is (sad)

Bruce is gotham's sugar daddy

why would say something so controversial yet so brave.

my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context

dick: gerard way are you in position, gerard way are you in position

tim: for the last fucking time, my codename is 'totally not count olaf' this week, abbafan 3000

dick: shut up my codename isn't 'abbafan 3000'

dick: it's 'abbafan number 1' and you know it

I have a feeling Tim drake is ur favourite batfamily member but okay u don't have favs if u say so ok

i mean he is, i won't deny it. but i love each and every one of the batfam just the same, i just have a weak spot for short dumbass nerds, because i'm a short dumbass nerd.

Omg i fuckin love boy meets world too fam shsjkfk

bro boy meets world was the shit!!! it was just fire and awesome and so fucking great like bro. it was so good im not even going to be accepting criticism

you know I find the whole "joker completes batman" thing a bit disgusting considering the horrendous stuff the batfamily went through because of the joker and let's not get started on the "joker has a point" thing like yeah he's this cool complex villain but he's absolutely batshit crazy

like yes! i get what you mean the joker just fucking sucks man he doesn't do shit for batman's character or the batfam he's literally just annoying as fuck. like the joker has a point' shit is so stupid. i will accept 'magneto was right' because he fucking was and i think he didn't do anything wrong, but joker? he's just like that. he's not even cool and complex he's just a weirdo with a bleach kink at this point.

ALSO YOUR RACISM POST- SO TRUE BESTIE

thanks bestie, i'm glad you agree.

in today's essay of why I think cass should become batman- I was thinking Tim would probably be the most efficient batman in many ways but I also think he wouldn't want to be batman tbh none of the batfamily members would want to be batman because they're trying to outgrow him but cass is the one who wants to represent the symbol that is batman

absofuckinglutely i will say it again and again that cass represents the batsymbol more than anyone in the batfam, in batgirl (2000) she literally didn't care about anything else than bruce's oath to not kill, she thought the batsymbol was more important than anything in gotham. she's just an excellent character because her motivation to not kill is not 'i'm scared i can't come back from it' or 'well my dad says no murder so i'll go along with it' but that she's killed somebody as a young child and she never wants to kill a human ever again and that's so fucking beautiful for a new batman like yes.

need more cass, duke and tim inclusion in gothamite memes

yes yes, a tall order of cass, duke and tim coming up in 1-14 business days

oldest to youngest batfam members cus I'm confused as shit

okay order of being taken in: dick, jason, tim, cass, damian, duke order of age: alfred, bruce, dick, cass, jason, tim, duke, damian (though cass and jason are around the same age general consensus is that cass is a little older)

I'm so confused Steph is a redhead?? like how was it that hard to get this right? the source material is literally right there and free

cw is jared, 19

do you receive anon hate? if so, how do you deal with it

uh no, i'm not remotely popular enough to get anon hate and i also don't say a lot of things that would attract anon hate, but i do send anon hate to @the-real-peter-parker because he forgot about the specialists from winx club

Wait how many languages do you speak??

uhh- 5 if you include latin, but that's a dead language and i'm really bad at it. but english, my native language, german, and french also, tho german and french not fluently.

You can mix aguaepanela with aguardiente 😈 and is tasty

okay but now i'm curious if the liquor deserves the 😈 emoji or if that's a you problem. but i googled it and it looks like something you'd take one sip of and then not remember the rest of your evening.

#i love all of you guys so much thanks for all these asks #some of these are literally from march but fuck it #the day tumblr puts dates next to anon messages is the day i close my inbox crawl into a hole and die #it's such a basic task to answer asks but i don't want to bother anyone with asks clogging up their timeline #and if i don't have a funny or good answer i'm like 'uhh okay won't answer it now then' #so this is for you #also i deleted a few asks because it gives me mental pain to see my inbox go over 50 and it's almost at 100 #i was complaining about having too many asks to the-real-peter-parker like months ago and then i had 45 asks in my inbox #now it's amassed to going over 100 twice #but no i love all of you and you're great and you're all fantastic and i lvoe you #muchos kiss kiss #kiss kiss for my kiddies lvoe you #invincible spoilers #dc #dcu #dc comics #ask #anon #bataranswers #i really wanna try aguapanela now i'm gonna see if i can find panela somewhere and review it for you babes #uh yeah that's it #muchos gracias for all your questions babes

[khaleesiofalicante]

me, nodding of to sleep: IM HERE IM HERE

did my head just loll to the side? you will never know. first of all this chapter was the most beautiful thing i have ever read. Mavid have my HEART. It's also 4 16 am so im sorry if the reactions are a little bland but this was PERFECT.

me, throughout the whole thing: mavid mavid mavid

They had kissed for the first time almost a week ago. And they had kissed again. A couple of times.

Okay fine, they had kissed a lot since then.

Not a lot a lot. But a lot.

Wait a minute. How much kissing was a lot of kissing?

this is adorable

“I heard he cried when he found out Lexi and Liv were dating,” David chuckled.

yup that's jace

“We have to pay to talk on the phone?” Max asked incredulously. “I thought it was free.”

“Of course it isn’t free, Max!” David chuckled. “We have to pay for WiFi too.”

“This is ridiculous!” Max said. “Next you will say we have to pay for electricity.”

“Um, we do have to pay for electricity,” David chuckled again.

we pay for water too

but max you didnt know-

“Don’t let them guilt trip you!” Max had chastised. “They like doing chores. Let them do it. They fight demons all day and then come home and do chores. I feel like it’s their form of therapy. They need this.”

cant relate nope

“I don’t know,” Max groaned. “My family is so dramatic.”

the lightwood-banes in one sentence

THERE ARE SO MANY FEELS MY HEART CANNOT CONTAIN

“Well, too late!” Max announced. “This date is going to be the best first date in the history of first of dates.”

In retrospect, he really shouldn’t have said that.

nah its gonna be great

“Perhaps you should just take him to the New York Library. They have, uh, books.”

yes that is what they keep in libraries

OH MY GOD THE FRIEND IS ELYASS

HERE'S MY FAVORITE DEMON Y'ALL

His parents would not be pleased if they knew Max was summoning demons for relationship advice.

But they had also encouraged Max to make friends with everyone regardless of their identity. So, technically this was their fault. They gave him very mixed messages.

well-

you know i really shouldnt have laughed at the demon attack news but for some reason i did

i blame my sleep deprivation

shit i feel sick

you know maybe i shouldve just waited till the morning...

ok but the demon attack is NOT coincidental

there is something going on

“I thought dragon demons were extinct!” Max yelled over the commotion.

well-

ANJALI

“Man, fuck the orders!” Max said in frustration.

if you get hurt ill kill you

oh it's not her

well fuck

“That was an Armani, you piece of shit!” Rafael yelled at the demon. Max almost laughed.

THE AUDACITY

It really did. Dragon demons smelled like they lived inside a boys locker room.

well that's nice to know

FUCK THEY ARE TALKING NOW???

ok what is going on

“Say the thing!!!”

“I’m not saying the damn thing, you maniac!”

“Say the thing!”

Rafael groaned and raised his hands, the alliance rune lighting up.

“I’m not just a shadowhunter,” Rafael said through gritted teeth. “I’m Magnus Bane’s son.”

LMAO THEM

“Well, demons are stupid,” Max pointed out.

“Yeah, that makes sense,” Rafael said with a mouthful of food. “You are half demon after all.”

Im so sleepy i cant even react to this

but THEM I CANT-

WHERE.IS.ALEC

Max wanted to laugh. Only David would worry about another person while being injured in the infirmary.

MUST BE PROTECTED

Max nodded; his throat still dry. He couldn’t stop staring at David. At the wound. At the blood.

Also, maybe the naked chest.

AHEM

OH MY GOD JAIME IS ALIVE

we're getting lightwood-bane fluff LET ME CRY

alec...

on one hand alec smoking is fucking hot BUT WITH THE MUNDANE DISEASES OH HELL NAH

“But it tastes so good when it’s from your plate!” Max said with a mouth full of food.

“Oh, you want my food? Here!” Rafael grinned and threw a piece of chicken at his face.

Max caught it with his mouth cause wasting food was a crime. “Thanks, bro!”

“You little s-”

HE CAUGHT IT IN HIS MOUTH

“And no fighting over chicken!” Bapak pointed out. “We can always summon some more.”

“Order,” dad corrected. “We don’t summon. We order. And then we pay.”

“How do we destroy capitalism if we have to pay for everything?” Max asked.

Max has a point y'know

“That’s rich coming from someone who is wearing an Armani jacket,” Max stuck out his tongue.

“It was a gift!” Rafael said, furiously chewing on his chicken.

“Does that mean Bapak is a capitalist?” Max asked.

LMAO

Max: What even-

Max: Can shadowhunters get high on iratzes lol

CAN THEY???

David: Mr Herondale yelled “Yes! Two out of three!”

MOOD

PLEASE RAFAEL AND MAGNUS ARE LIKE "About time"

SAME THOUGH

“David is what you get if Dad and Uncle Jace and Uncle Jem had a baby.”

STOP NO

“Oh,” Max said. “Uh, David and I…We are dating.”

Dad choked on his coffee. “Excuse me?”

Bapak chuckled next to him. “Of course you didn’t know.”

“You two are dating?” dad demanded. “Since when? Who else knows about this? Why didn’t you tell us before? Were you dating when you were in London? Magnus, did you know about this?”

“There you go!” Max yelled triumphantly. “That’s the dramatic reaction I was looking for. Thanks, dad!”

There's alec. Yup

OH MY GOD NOT THE SEX TALK

good thing i had wattpad I MEAN-

“Kissing?” dad gaped. “On the mouth???”

“Um, where else would we kiss?” Max asked incredulously.

“Well, actually,” Bapa cleared his throat. “There are many ways you can enjoy-”

IM CACKLING

And that’s how the next hour turned out to be the most painful and most embarrassing hour of his life.

Max decided he would rather get attacked by a hoard of dragon demons than sit through it any longer

“You guys know we have something called the internet, right?” Max demanded.

“Well, the internet can have mixed messages,” Bapak sniffed. “We on the other hand have real life experien-”

“Magnus!” dad looked red in the face.

“Fine,” Bapak sighed. “Now moving on to the importance of lubrication and-”

“I’m begging you to stop,” Max groaned.

THE NOISES WHICH LEFT MY MOUTH ARE NOT OK TO BE MAKING AT 3 30 AM

“I’ll have you know this conversation utterly traumatized me. I demand financial compensation.”

HE'S SO DRAMATIC

“Well,” dad said carefully. “David is…”

“French?” Max asked.

i blame my sleep deprived ass for laughing at this

next thing i know someone's being tortured and im laughing because i dont have sleep in my system

Max honey...

listen to him

i for one, dont want a repeat of pg 511 cols

oh he's finding out about the incident

that's what i call it

Max thought of all the stories he had heard then. The one of the warlock who killed people who he could bring back his dead girlfriend. The one about a nephilim mother who paired up with prince of hell to bring back her dead son.

oh yeah...

shudder

They called it The Jem effect.

AYYYYY

It was true. In fact, he used to have a crush on both Tessa and Jem. It’s how he had found he was bisexual.

very very valid. have a good day sir

AWW MAX DIDNT KNOW HE COULD BLUSH

you know it's a sign ive been watching b99 too much that i was imagining mina talking like gina...

pls send help

ALSO MINA BESTEST SDCHJDFVYDYUGFYUGFVDYVFD

“Can we not talk about my boyfriend’s sperm, please?”

im surprised my parents havent woken up by the sound i let out

BUT HEY THE DOOR'S CLOSED SO

SUGGENS MINA

“I’m hearing an inflated sense of self-importance,” he heard Ragnor call from the bathroom. “Is Magnus here?”

“Just the spawn,” Max called back.

THE SPAWN BYE-

“He is married to the Consul!” Tessa chuckled. “And one of his sons is a shadowhunter.”

“It’s still very bad for our reputation,” Ragnor grumbled. “He is too close with shadowhunters.”

“You are the headmaster of Scholomance!” Catarina said incredulously. “You teach nephilim! Even though you don’t need a job!”

“I was coerced!” Ragnor huffed. “Manipulated by the children of the angel.”

really ragnor?

The grin disappeared and Ragnor buried his face on Catarina’s shoulder. “I can’t go through this again, Cat! Not again!”

“So much for not taking up after his father, huh?” Catarina chuckled and looked at him. “That’s nice, Max. We are happy for you.”

“We are not!” Ragnor said in a muffled voice.

RAGNOR DJHDCUHUKIHDVVFDDB

OOOO MAX DIDNT KNOW ABOUT CAMILLE

a kind of endless love...

dont make me cry

“I know you are worried, love,” Tessa’s voice was a whisper. “You are worried about surviving after David. You are worried about your own heart. But you should never let that fear stop you from finding love. Because love is what sustains us immortals. It keeps us alive. When you love a mortal, you love them forever. You might not remember all the memories. The colour of their eyes or the sound of their voice. But you will remember the love. You will carry that love inside you forever. It does not make you weak or fragile. It makes you stronger. And you will forever be grateful for it.”

my eyeballs are too tired to cry

stop it

THEY SAID I LOVE YOU

I FEEL LIKE A PROUD MOM

bitch you hate children wtf-

Max laughed. “I’m going to kill dad for making us do this. God, this is so weird!”

better get it done now

HE'S DAVID'S FOREVER

dont do this to me at 4 am

“You should two should some spend time together. Get to know each other and all of that,” Max suggested with a smile. “Maybe you can bond over archery or something.”

“I’m pretty sure he would use me for target practice,” David mumbled.

“Don’t be ridiculous, David!” Max said incredulously. “My father doesn’t need target practice!”

At this point, a David and alec scene isn't a want its a NEED

“I got it all planned,” Max said – for someone who had no idea what he was going to do.

me throughout life

max Rafael isn't the one smoking-

OH MY GOD MY DAD JUST CAME TO CHECK ON ME THE WAY I SLAMMED MY LAPTOP

“Also tell him to stop smoking!” Max pointed out seriously. “It’s not good for his health! Especially with all the mundane illnesses going on.”

“I know, Max,” dad sighed heavily and blinked. “I mean, I’ll talk to him. For sure.”

Alec if anything happens to you...just know ill raise hell

“I don’t want easy,” David smiled. “I want you.”

IT'S 4 AM DUDE

AYYY THE SHANGHAI SHADOW MARKET

CELESTIAL PALACE

“Dad? The Consul? That dad?” David looked surprised and relieved all at once. “Oh my god, he doesn’t hate me!”

“Of course he doesn’t hate you!” Max chuckled. “But he did say he will put your nerd ass in the silent city if you don’t bring me home by 11.”

of course, he did

oh my god SLEEP. there is so much to do tomorrow dying...my grammar was really bad and I don't have what it takes to use Grammarly's corrections except for the ones it's already doing as type.

this chapter had my heart BURSTING!! AHHHHHHH

the talk was so important I'm so glad they took care of that. ok imma head to bed now BYEE

Eeeeeee this was a lot sfkjdfkd I hope you are okay. Get some sleep next time or I will call the police.

Thank you as always for reading, reacting and supporting 💚

#lbaf

[the-acid-pear]

I didn't want to but my last post got so long Tumblr can't load it AFSGSGAHH so this is my second post bc liveblogging this manga is part of my personality now <3

From where i left,

I love seeing Shibukawa i hate knowing how that fight will go down tho </3

JACKKKK 🥺

Oh is that literally Andre the giant?

MOTOBEEEE 💞

THAT'S RETSU?! GOD I DIDN'T RECOGNIZE HIM AT ALL I-

KUREHA IS BACK TOO NICE

Katou baby you won't last

YESSSSSSSS YES YES YES MY SON.

Yeah and uh, Katsumi whatever.

BABYYYYYYYYY BOYYYYYYYYYY

Poor Kozue on god pugoygpgu

Toba 🥺

Kozue like 😨

Chapter 186

You don't know but like 2 days passed and i actually forgot what was happening VÑVPJOYG

I just remembered that scene in the fairy odd parents movie where the crowd goes OHHH AHHH

WHAT NUT?

I don't want to simp so early in the morning but UGHHH look at him!!

Hey has Baki always been doing the yujiro stand or is this new?

Feel you Mr Andre the giant i too have been told to not use my full strength. Though I'm just 1.60, my power comes from my anger issues and my god given right to kick ass

That's one strong kick

Rip the crowd n Andre the giant

Chapter 187

I don't think that's true Baki boy

That's a big number sir

I really don't care about this fight much at all surudtidkgxkhkdgksr

Poor Kozue man

Okay no apparently all cis men on the comments did want to become the string ???? Get help /j

Chapter 188

This is prob cool if you know who these people are. I unfortunately don't.

Look of bloodlust? He looks like the average fuckboy

YESSS BABEY LET'S GOOO THE GLASSES ARE BACKKK

Me watching the anime: omg that's so random why is he wearing glasses out of nowhere lol?

Me now (my brain is bigger): WOOOOOOOOO

I'm still obsessed with Toba's size

IFYOYDITDPUGPJG

Okay i had to google who igari was bc i wasn't recognizing him, now I'm cheering on him

This is gonna be a good one, hopefully

That was murder

DOPPO POG DOPPO POG-

Chapter 189

Hehehe this title sounds promising 👀

KSJSKSHSJS BRO 🥺

I really can't tell if he's scared of confident, i HOPE he's confident like, he's my pollo afteral (i make that joke in Spanish bc idk how to do it in English 😭)

Nice feet (See? No one can accuse me of having a foot fetish because no one reads these haha!)

I'm not gonna simp for 3 lines straight but i can't just pass this without saying how much i love how Doppo looks in this arc my man looking more precious than usual 😌🥺💞

Shout-out to the ppl in the comments wishing Motobe a happy bday <33

Chapter 190

These men just LOVE breaking fingers don't they?

It was a pleasure knowing you Motobe-san

I must say Doppo first watching the fights with Katou now with his son is like, super damn sweet like this dude is just such a Dad™

Sumo is such a damn cool sport tbh, i watched like one documentary on it once and nothing else but it's just like damn

NOOOUGHHH

MOTOBE IS FUCKING DEAD.

Lshekwhwksgskd someone was mentioning how they make Motobe sound like a badass but he loses every time and someone just responded "He's 50", which is similar to the justification i tried to give myself whenever Doppo kept fucking losing but then you have mfs like Shibukawa who is 70 and is just mad powerful KSVSNSH 😔

Chapter 191

Hehe the king ☺️

THAT WAS SO RANDOM AJGSJSGEJSG i love this mf

FUCK HOW SHORT IS RETSU OMG 🥺

1.76 HE'S SO TINY HE'S SHORTED THAN DOPPO OMFG

also if y'all wonder how I'm doing my jaw is currently trembling and i think i have a fever, but it's fine, we getting to 200 today boys

I really don't care much about Katsumi but he has a very shaped face i won't lie, his eyes are very pretty too. STILL DONT CARE BOUT HIM 🙄😒

They just throwing hands these mfs ffs

Katsumi that's a bit too far don't you think?

A fuckin pussy out sort of luck i see

Chapter 192

I hate smooth Retsu sm let him keeps his face wrinkles ffs

Obsessed with these lads

ANDRE MY MAN look at him

EVERYBODY IS GETTING IN THE WAY FR SPUGPYDOTSÑD

I love how these characters say <3

Fucked up to beat up a wounded man tho NGL :/

OH FUCK HIS ELBOW NO

Chapter 193

Idk man after 180+ chapters Retsu's body doesn't look that wild to me

I know he will lose bc uh, Retsu obviously? But man i really like this Russian

Kozue that's how every match is

Hhhh 😬

He's dead.

Chapter 194

OH MY GOD HIM AGAIN?! HHH FFS!!!

VAMOOOS KATOU

Hey they aren't doing the white lips thing anymore that's sick

Motobe Latino /j

OYFPUTDPUTDPUTDPID

NO MY MAN KATOU IS NO MATCH TO YUJIRO NO ONE IS NOOO 😢

Chapter 195

Monkee

MY BOY BAKI GETTING THAT GOOD OL FLASHBACK HUH BAKI PTSD MOMENCE

YEET

Chapter 196

LSHLSHEKEBSJSHSVS IM LOSING IT

Look at the cocky mf man sjsgdhd

I must say i love the progression of Baki's personality

ANDOOOO

Chapter 197

Katsumi is deranged

My health problems are solved btw

I honestly hope Katsumi wins, for the honor of shinshinkai exclusively

Doppo looks so proud of his son 🥺

These mfs so childish ffs

...how is he that small 😭

I really don't understand any of these people

Chapter 198

I love seeing Toba just around doing shit like yeah king you go. My nostalgia enjoys his presence

Toba king i don't want to see you on a wheelchair please-

Toba baby you are going to die and horrible death and i will hate to be the witness of it

LSHSJSHSKHWKSHS ???

He's dead 😔

SHOUT-OUT TO THE FUCKING ASSHOLE WHO COMPARED TOBA TO THE TERRAFORMARS ROACHES 😭😭💀

Chapter 199

Igari right? He's dead too. I have less doubt than anyone else, Hanayama is a beast.

THEHWHSHHS 😭 WHY DOES HE HAVE TO OPEN BOTTLES LIKE THAT FFS

Different? Idk man he looks the same to me

Chapter 200

Like it's not just brawling man if anyone the size and strenght of Hanayama did anything they would win no matter what, this mf is a beast

THAT'S SO MEAN THEY WERE SUCH BESTIES OUGH MY HEART 😢💔

I'm sorry, he's gonna get WHAT? 😳

Ndhskshskhdkd obsessed

THESE MEN OMFG.... IM LOSING IT

So glad at least SOMEONE is still a bro 😒

HANAYAMA BRO??? IM BETTING ALL MY MONEY ON YOU BRO PLEASE

Obsessed he didn't even realize

THANKS HANAYAMA PHEW I WAS GETTING WORRIED FOR A SECOND THERE!

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

And that's it for tonight, adiós

#luly talks #btg #i was worried about this being super short but like 🥴 nah not at all NSHSKSHD #im gonna be honest im having fun yes but im not super into this arc its just. kinda... silly? in a way?? #i dont understand these idiots at all #shit was so simple at the very start i rlly miss those days 😔

[bisaster-energy]

I just rewatched Avengers and I'm fucking LOSING it

I forgot bro...

I forgot how annoying Steve was alsmalmdns

And dont come at me saying that I don't like him simply because I love Tony Stark (as i should!!) Because i remember being so fucking irked when I first watched this movie!! And I just remembered how mad I was when I watched it again cos I forgot like 60% of what was said and what happened tbh

And Steve. Oh my god. Listening to what he said just pissed me off a majority of the film!! Like bruh! What are you doing hon!!

I get it tho like he just woke up, the future is crazy, all his friends are dead it's insane and fucked up!! But jfc his instant dislike for Tony is weird as hell 💀

He doesn't treat anyone else with the same disdain? Like i get it bc Tony has a loud personality and not everyone has to like him ofc

But he's just so...ugh

Like Tony is on the ship next to Steve and they just bagged loki and thor is gonna show up soon. And Tony is doing his normal rambling shit and basically tries to get to know Steve?? At least that's how i saw it? But ig it pissed steve off cos he just ignored what tony said and said "fury didn't tell me he was calling you in" and he just seemed upset that tony was there? Idk if it was because he came late or cos Loki surrendered like moments after tony showed up or cos he made a joke about steve doing pilates to stay spry (lmao) but he didn't seem happy that Tony was there :/

And later Tony's labbing it up with his shiny new science bro Bruce and poking him (cos that's what he does) and obv bruce would tell Tony to cut that shit out if he really was upset by it but all he can say is "ow!!" Before steve busts into the lab like "ARE YOU CRAZY YOUTRYNAKILLUSALL?!?!? no offence doc :)" and bruce is like "ok I'm not gonna hulk out chill" and basically steve is just in there to tell tony off (I seriously wonder if he was camping outside the lab waiting for Tony to do something he didn't like because he came in RIGHT after tony poked Bruce so)

And i get why he would do that but bruh im pretty sure bruce is fine lmao plus he and tony seem to be getting along so far so idk why he thought "dear god the genius is gonna get us all killed with his reckless behavior!!" And went in to save the day lmao. Maybe I'm just being a bitch but if i were steve I'd see if there was a real problem first. And hulk is a scary concept I get it but steve literally said to Bruce that the only thing he cares about is the fact that he can find the tesseract ans yet every chance he gets he's like "careful guys we don't wanna set banner off now do we?" Like bruh if you were concerned about how much of a handle he has on hulk why didn't you just god damn say so instead of lying to this man's face 😔

What I got from the scenes between tony and bruce vs the scenes between steve in bruce is that Tony trusts that bruce could handle being on this mission while steve just...doesnt :/

So naturally Tony thinks something hinky is going on with shield and bruce fuckin agrees cos hell yeah Science Bros plus SHIELD is sus

And steve is like "don't go snooping this is why shield doesn't like you stark >:( now get back to finding that cube" and then he fucked off to literally do exactly what Tony was doing but without hacking.

Are you kidding me?? We always talk about how much of a hypocrite steve was in Ultron when he was mad at tony for keeping secrets and then keeping the Stark murder a secret but this man showed us who he was from the get go lmao

But then they find out *gasp* Tony was right! Big shocker there huh. And SHIELD is super sus and loki is like bruh y'all cant defeat me like this smh

And one of the most MIND BLOWING scenes in this film is where they're all arguing around the scepter, who's being a chaotic little bitch

Now keep in mind, the scepter was definitely influencing everyone but it didn't tell them WHAT to think or say lmao so i have to assume that to some extent they mean that shit

So I'm just supposed to be focusing on steve so sorry for going off topic but Fury turning the topic of the conversation to tony saying how he built his fortune off of weapons?? That shit was uncalled for like bruh...there was a whole movie about his character development and how he shut down his weapons bc he found out they were hurting innocents...

But anyways

Steve takes this opportunity to call tony out for being narcissistic. His evidence? I'll have to get back to you on that cos i have no fucking clue.

Here's the big argument where we get most of our good old anti-steve content tbh:

Steve says tony is nothing without the suit

Again: where is this man's evidence?? Why is he saying these mean things?? AND I KNOW IT'S COS OF THE SCEPTER BUT NO ONE ELSE WAS TALKING FOR THIS LONG OR ZEROING IN ON ONE PERSON SO STFU

He seems upset that tony actually answers his question like...you asked what i was without the suit? (The best part is that natasha did a little head nod, agreeing with tony calling himself "genius billionaire plybiy philanthropist")

says he knows guys worth ten of Tony without any of the stuff he listed

He just met Tony. They haven't even known each other a week and he's ready picking at his insecurities?? Crazy. Plus when steve says "I've seen the footage. The only person you fight for is yourself." Like ok there wasn't exactly a war for him to go and fight in but go off rogers. When was he supposed to fight for other ppl and what makes you say he didn't?? I'm so confused about the thought process here. And the footage he saw? What was it? Him saving people at the Expo? Him fighting terrorists? A sex tape of him that got leaked??

Says Tony wouldn't sacrifice for someone, wouldn't let some guy crawl over him while laying on a wire

Again how does he know that Tony WOULDN'T?? He's just saying random shit at this point and I just cant

And Tony again gives a smart remark because that's what he does plus it's funny

He said he would cut the wire, which is such a tony thing to say tbh. Like,,in Afghanistan they were like "build us weapons or die" basically and he said "I pick the third option" and got the hell outta dodge

And steve is upset by this answer as well! Another shocker. He says "always a way out" like lol why not? Why are you so pissed? What is the issue darling??

And Tony FINALLY stoops to Steve's level of throwing out insults and says "lmao like you?? Bruh your talents came from a science experiment. Your "heroism" came from a bottle you clown" (obv he didn't say it like that what I said was actually meaner tbh i just hate steve)

And the worst thing i think steve said in the entire film: "you may not be a threat but you better stop pretending to be a hero"

I was just VIBRATING with anger at this I was LIVID. Tony has so many damn insecurities and this is not helping!! Like bruh wtf is Steve doing rn!! Everyone else stopped arguing at this point and is just LOOKING at steve basically tell Tony he's nothing special for no reason besides him not liking tony for reasons unexplained

And wanna know what Tony doesnt do? Listen to him. Im actually pretty sure he told him to fight him twice and tony doesn't get the suit either time lol

And steve has NO comeback for that so he just tells tony to straight up fight him lmao

Idk why I keep forgetting that Steve likes to resolve disagreements by fighting in alleys. So he's ready to post up as if tony is some jock who just wont leave this poor dame be and tiny asthmatic Stevie is the only one willing to stop him. Steve you are HUGE now and tony is just existing next to you and you're yelling at him for it. This scene makes steve look a lot less like a hero and a lot more like the bullies he so fervently advocates against ngl

And then steve grabs tony when shit starts to hit the fan bc "you cant go alone!!" Like bruh just follow him lmao why are you stopping him (just a personal pet peeve tbh not really a big deal i just didn't like it)

And I'll say this again: IK THE SCEPTER WAS MAKING EVERYONE ANGRY AND SHIT! I GET IT! But out of that whole mass argument Steve was the only person focusing on one individual and for such a long ass time too! Tony said one thing that was on the offence instead in defence of himself that whole time and I'm crying cos how tf does the impulsive asshole have more self control than the golden boy Captain America?? I'm at a loss here folks

The way i see it, Tony and Steve don't like each other. They rub each other the wrong way. But the reason i don't like Steve is that he has contempt for Tony right off the bat with no explanation? And meanwhile Tony's whole childhood was probably riddled with Captain America. He probably saw Steve every damn day, or heard his dad talk about him in a higher regard than his own son. So he probably had this ingrained jealousy of Steve from the start and he STILL managed to be as civil as he usually is. But Steve?? I can only fucking guess.

So yeah there's my rant sorry I've been doing so many of these recently I just had a lot of time on my hands and decided to watch some Marvel and get pissed about it lol

TL;DR: after watching Avengers again I realized that Steve has always been pretty shitty so his character development wasn't exactly a drop, more like a stagnant line that no one noticed because he was pretty okay in the Captain America movies

#anti steve rogers #his emotional state is just: i dont think but when i do i hate tony stark #tony's very existence offends him #and i could go on and on about how all the lther shut he said throughout the film because he said more shit that PISSED ME OFF but i'll sto #ik how annoying i am #i just think steve couldnt come up with a valid reason for disliking tony so he made some shit up about him not being a real hero #and had to eat his words when tony flew a damn nuke into space #in reality i think tony intimidates steve bc tony thought the fight with loki was suspiciously easy #and steve was like: he wasn't that easy to fight actually #idk why he even said that like who cares man it's not that big of a deal #Tony has a reason admittedly a bad one to straight up hate captain America: ✨daddy issues✨ #but Steve has had no interactions with Tony to explain this behavior 😭 #he knew exactly what he was doing when he called stark tower ugly too #it's not like he forgot who it belonged to it's in the name he just wanted to be mean 😂 #it's not a big deal for tony to have his name on the tower like...it's on brand STARK IS THE BRAND NAME MY GUY #stark industries ringing any bells?? #god the stupidity in this room 😌