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#bruce wayne has had enough
turboloverjudas69 · 2 years
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Dick and Jason dressed as pirates on a platform with wheels interrupting Wayne Enterprise board meeting Steph pushes the platform and playing pirates of the Caribbean theme as they perform a sword duel, they roll around the table and exit through the door as Bruce has a deadpan look and keeps whispering “those are my grown children” “let them bond” and immediately after they leave goes back to the meeting as if nothing happened. Music can be heard in the corridor as they invade more meetings. Tim almost kills them.
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Jason, texting : *Sends a voice message* Bruce, texting back: I’m a little busy, is it urgent? Jason: No, don’t worry, just listen later. *Later* Bruce: *Presses play* Jason's voice message: THERE’S A FIRE-
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currant-owo · 9 months
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Awkward meetings
Pretty much the same things happen as in canon, but Danny almost constantly bumps into Ra's in his time travel (where dc and dp can exist together or as separate/parallel alternate universes). After an indeterminate number of meetings, the contents of which I won't reveal, both came to an unspoken agreement to ignore each other no matter what.
Remarkably, the order of encounters for Ra's and Danny is chronologically confusing, as is their timeline relative to each other. How strong. No one knows at what segment of their meetings the other is. It's so damn confusing that Ra's and Danny keep logs of meetings, in a futile attempt to sort this shit out one day without potentially destabilizing the current time stream, the Flash's bullshit is more than enough, thanks.
And out of a desire to avoid all this headache, they most often just walk by and report their subjective meeting number. On rare occasions, they warn each other about how their next meeting might go, or simply ask the other to remind them of something.
Their awkward meetings/attempts to avoid prolonged interaction will look quite funny from the outside.
It seemed that the League always had its own "Cryptid". At truly random intervals (day, week, month, years), the same child quickly appeared in front of the Demon Head and just as quickly disappeared. Most often they exchanged some numbers, less often he uttered some phrases. Neither of them will even look at the other, eager to leave as soon as possible (the longer they are around, the higher the chance that something unpleasant will happen, strange, but together they often attract any kind of trouble from an earthquake to level threats end of the world).
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arrowmaker15 · 4 months
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(Father's Day, pt 4)
Bruce: Damian... Please tell me this isn't what I think this is.
Damian: I do not play games, Father.
Bruce:
Bruce: Why did you get me a birdcage with five Robins, the actual birds, in it?
Damian: You collect Robins. And you insist on all of them living here. Hence, one birdcage.
Bruce:
Bruce, muttering: I should've stopped at Jason...
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martyrbat · 24 days
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the funniest (tragic) thing is multiple times and in different canons bruce HAS tried healthier coping methods and life choices than being 'just' batman. he journals and its stolen and hes blackmailed with it and alfred is put at risk because of it. he skips patrol for a date and people are killed. hes goes to therapists and they either try to kill him or end up getting killed, leading bruce to blame himself and not attempt it again. he rests while being sick and wakes up exhausted and in pain and feeling guilty because he thinks of how many aren't waking up because of his need to sleep.
but when hes paranoid, hes more likely to benefit for it. from contingency plans to obsessive training to get through a fight or a dangerous situation. from excessive research to solve crimes and help people to pushing his body constantly because his weakness can be what gets someone killed. hes keeping people of at arms length the best he can lest they hurt him and what hes fighting for or end up being killed because tragedy follows him like a hungry dog waiting for its next meal.
sure, his obsessiveness blows up in his face sometimes. hes scolded for it, people feel betrayed from it, hes isolate because of it. but if people get away, dont they usually end up better? he'll rather care from afar and know theyre safe but hate him then chance them being killed or used as a weapon because he wasn't prepared.
hes caught always feeling selfish for his love, something thats always fueled him and his choices, because he knows what it brings. hes caught feeling guilty in his attempts of normality and wanting a real life because then who will take care of gotham and who is he to say his happiness is worth more than the strangers on the street lives? hes always punished if he attempts happiness and hes punished when he attempts to always be prepared—the only difference is the later usually doesn't have as many people being killed. so without fail, every single time, bruce is going to sacrifice his own life and his own happiness so others can have it instead. and usually, its the 'right' choice, all other options leading to something terrible.
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hamandeggbun · 8 months
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kicking off fanart here with a silly little poster i made!
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symbolicbluecurtains · 6 months
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"I've got soul but I'm not a soldier"
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bluegarners · 6 months
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pushing my bruce wayne has gray eyes agenda
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weewoow-20706030 · 1 year
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Look kudos to Alfred for everything he has done but especially for dealing with Bruce's teenage angst.
Teenage Bruce *bent over his desk in the dead of night scribbling away in a notebook*: then I will become the night and destroy anyone who stands in my way. They will all suffer at my hand and regret even thinking a bad thought about me >:(
Alfred who went up to make sure Bruce had gone to bed:....
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br-uwu-cewayne · 2 years
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I believe in Bitchy Old Queen Alfred supremacy.
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Okay so these three (1 2 3)posts gave me a fix idea that hopefully I’ll write (my wip list is long okay).
Okay so what if when Thomas and Martha Wayne were killed the trauma it caused Bruce created a darkness in his soul and it broke off almost and it turned into his shadow, maybe it stayed dormant for a while maybe it didn’t. But it’s a dark part of him (although it does have it’s own light/kindness, dark doesn’t mean evil). It can take it’s own form rather than being just his shadow, and it can let him turn into a part of it which is what happens when he’s Batman, that’s what batblob really is. People from other cities like Metropolis and Central etc don’t understand why Gothamites call Batman a creature or a cryptid. I mean he’s just a vigilante. But gothamite know that there’s something not entirely human about him.
I drew on so many posts I’ve read with this
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asexualbert · 1 year
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Posting this now because I don't know exactly how to start the next bit and I feel like this sits pretty nicely ("nice" being a loose term) on its own for a while.
So, thanks @nerfherdingteleporter for that lovely list of questions, I WILL answer them all, even if not all with full stories but "How did Jason and Tim get caught?" caught my eye
So let's start there :)
He was sore and achy everywhere which... Was a significant improvement over the last time he could recall. He'd been...
———
Jason woke up slowly, clawing through the foggy, muddled feeling in his mind.
Oh.
Oh...
Jason's next breath came out shaking as flashes of memory came back to him.
His mother's face as he was dragged away
The beating
Hitting his head as he was tossed to the ground
The beating
The stabbing fluorescent lights above him, piercing into his aching head
The beating
That horrible laughter, never ending throughout the endless, constant,
Beating.
It must have lasted hours, days, even. He'd lost track. All he knew was that it hurt.
It had hurt so much.
It should have killed him. It may have if it hadn't been for the- for his horrible sense of drama.
Jason whimpered quietly as more pieces began to slot together in his exhausted mind.
The clock. The big, red, glowing, digital countdown.
Bomb.
He'd been conscious. Maybe miraculously.
Maybe unfortunately.
It had hurt so much, dragging himself across the concrete, fighting his broken body to reach the door.
But he'd made it. He must have.
He couldn't remember picking the lock or pulling himself out and away from that nightmare building but, he must have.
The next thing he remembered was collapsing on hard pavement. Outside. Away. Free.
And then also... A vehicle. Coming towards him.
Bruce.
It must have been Bruce, there was no other option that made sense. After all, who else would be all the way out by an abandoned warehouse on the outskirts of Gotham at ass-o'clock in the morning but his dad, looking for him.
Jason relaxed as everything started to make sense. Bruce had come. He'd found him. Saved him.
He hadn't been able to bring him home yet, he reasoned, as the sterile white room around him started to process.
They'd had to go to a hospital then. That made sense.
The distant aches in place of horrible pain made sense too. He must be on a lot of pain killers. It wasn't his preference, generally he'd rather not take any drugs at all. But Bruce wouldn't let anyone do anything bad to him.
So as he drifted back off to sleep, he figured that everything must be alright.
He was safe.
-–—–-
Bruce stared, unfeeling, at the results. It was... Impossible. There had to be something else, some other proof that...
But there wasn't.
They'd spent nearly 14 hours searching, all hands on deck, and all signs had pointed towards that god awful warehouse.
That godawful pile of rubble now.
The DNA match wasn't perfect. Less than fifty percent, but they couldn't have expected much more with his... With the body so ruined.
He didn't want to believe it. Wished and hoped desperately that there was any other way but... All the evidence was there. There was no one else in that wearhouse when the bomb went. And besides, he'd had so little biological family. The body simply couldn't BE anyone else.
There was no other option anymore. They had to stop looking.
He... Jason. His baby was dead.
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Jason: *Texting* Hey, can you pick me up I’m drunk. Jason: Oh you don't have to anymore. I'm home now. Bruce: Yes, I'm aware of that after dropping you off at home
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*starts dancing*
I hate where I live and I want to puke; I am infantilized inspiration porn, baby!
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martyrbat · 3 months
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the silent night of the batman — batman #219
(ID in alt!)
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partywithponies · 8 months
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I feel like enough time has passed since Steven Universe ending to say this: inventing your own alter ego and then launching a war against yourself is an iconic move actually. It's like if Batman and Bruce Wayne had public beef except if entire armies were involved. She really Did That. She said "go big or go home" and then went so big that no-one could ever go home, and then changed the fate of the entire galaxy by faking her own death. She slutted it up bisexually and broke countless hearts along the way. Iconic move after iconic move. Non-stop slaying. A queen an icon a legend. No-one does it like her.
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