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#bruh she's hot step on me ma'am
hakkikun · 2 years
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SYLVIE SHERWOOD a.k.a. The Handler ✧ SPY X FAMILY EPISODE 6
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leverage-ot3 · 4 years
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notable moments from The Wedding Job
leverage 1.07
Nate: No. No, it's-it's not right. But, you know, uh, we're not detectives. And if you want to prove your husband's innocence, there are plenty of agencies I could recommend.
eliot and hardison share tired, annoyed looks and I felt that in my soul
- - - - - 
Teresa: I understand. Thank you. Where did my daughter go?
Hardison:I think she was with Parker.
(Parker is teaching the little girl how to pick locks)
Parker: Go! 
(they both begin to work on the locks, after a few seconds, the girl gets hers open)
Parker: 6 seconds! Give it up! Good job.
parker can be good with kids and it’s adorable
- - - - - 
Hardison: Just take the mob out of it.
Nate: What? Take the mob out of it?
Hardison: Hear me out. Isn't this just a breach of contract?
Eliot: These guys had a deal, right? And your boy, Ray, he lived up to his end, but Moscone didn't. And for that, there's not a court of law in this world this lady can go to.
Parker: Which is exactly the kind of case we take
the ot3 immediately jumping in to support sophie’s idea
- - - - - 
Hardison: We can't. That thing's a fortress, man. I clocked four armed guards, a Tikva security system. That thing's Israeli-Made. It's used to protect their military bases. It's unhackable. Oh, and then there's the FBI parked around the corner.
Parker: FBI? Where? (looking through camera lens)
Hardison: You see that crappy van that says "plumber"?
Sophie: Did you say "plumber"? That's their cover? Oh, that is so cute. It's like it's 1978 all over again
- - - - - 
Parker: I saw some rubber gloves. What do you do with those?
McSweeten: Oh, actually, we've just been kind of blowing them up and playing volleyball. But, uh, yeah, if we need to do any kind of investigation…
big boredom during quarantine mood
- - - - - 
eliot being proud of the one (1) thing he did on the computer 
- - - - - 
parker winked at mcsweeten that poor boy, I’d be smitten too
+
fic writers get on this, parker smells like jasmine
- - - - - 
Hardison: All you have to do is rip them on my flash drive and run.
[FBI Offices]
(Eliot closes the door)
Eliot: I don't have to type anything, right?
[Leverage Headquarters]
Hardison: No, just plug it in. It does the rest.
Eliot: All right, 'cause you know I just learned the Photoshop thing you told me.
Hardison: I-I know. Baby steps.
[FBI Offices]
Eliot: So I just plug it in.
(Eliot forces open a set of cabinet doors and they open, revealing stacks of cassette tapes. He looks at the flash drive in his hand)
[Leverage Headquarters]
Hardison: Now, audio files, they can take a little while to run, but, uh, the servers are pretty loud, so that should give you some cover.
[FBI Offices]
Eliot: It's tapes.
[Leverage Headquarters]
Hardison: Wha-hold, wait. Did y-you just say "tapes"?
Eliot: I just said "tapes"!
Hardison: Cassette tapes?
[FBI Offices]
(Eliot picks up a cassette case and taps it with the flash drive)
Eliot: Your little thing, it's not gonna work.
[Leverage Headquarters]
Hardison: But at least you ain't got to type nothing.
[FBI Offices]
Eliot: Hardison, how am I supposed to get out of the FBI offices with a boxful of surveillance tapes, huh?
[Leverage Headquarters]
Hardison: Punch somebody.
[FBI Offices]
Eliot: Oh, I’m gonna punch somebody
- - - - - 
Nate: Can you break the codes?
Hardison: The codes? The codes to the Cayman Bank and Trust, where the Cali cartel and the African dictators keep all their dirty money? The ones that Moscone changes anytime he damn well pleases? Like, it's-c-come on. Dude, are you kidding me?
Nate: You know, you're-you're very negative lately. 
Eliot: Yeah. 
Nate: And the sass, it doesn't-doesn't help.
bruh lay off hardison
- - - - - 
[audio of mob family fighting playing off of hardison’s computer]
Sophie: It's a bit like an opera, isn't it?
Eliot: You mean 'cause I want to run away
- - - - - 
Nate: Sophie. Where are we at?
Sophie: Huh? I don't know, Nate. I think you need to ask yourself that question. You called me, remember? And now we're working together every day. I don't know what you want. And to ask me that dressed like a vicar? You're a very strange man.
Nate: No, no, no. I meant where are we at with finding the money?
Sophie: Oh.
chaotic sophienate 
- - - - - 
Nate: How are we doing? How's the search?
Eliot (chopping vegetables): I haven't started yet.
Nate: Okay, you know, I haven't gotten one answer I was looking for today. What is it that you're doing? What's going on?
Eliot: I'm cutting onion, deveining shrimp, uh, pan-searing some scallops. I've got 200 people I got to feed, all right? Back off.
Nate: Okay, okay. Hmm.
Eliot: What, you think the only thing I know how to do is bust heads?
Nate: No, well, yeah.
Eliot (demonstrating): Look, hold a knife like this, cuts through an onion. Hold a knife like this, cuts through, like, eight yakuza in 4 seconds. Screams, carnage. People are like knives. Everything is in context.
Heather (enters): Okay, hors d'oeuvres.
Eliot: Yes, ma'am. Stuffed mushrooms, pine nuts, kiss of basil, some sun-dried tomatoes, and the finishing touch, lemon juice. (gives her bite)
Heather (spits it out): Does this look like a food court? Does it? I want high-End food - High-End! What are you— (walks out)
(Eliot starts to go after her with the knife, Nate stops him)
Eliot: I know.
NEVER GET BETWEEN ELIOT AND HIS FOOD
also, eliot only becoming murderous when someone insults his food? iconic
- - - - - 
Sophie (to bridesmaid): You look lovely.
Cindy: You don't think it makes me look fat?
Parker: Oh, definitely. I mean, why do you think I had to let out the waist? To make you look less skinny?
Sophie: She... she didn't mean that.
Heather: Oh, suck it up, Cindy. You'll be fine.
if someone did this to me I would c r y and that’s the truth lmfao
- - - - - 
the ot3 eating pizza and laughing as nate verbally fucks himself over with sophie lmao
- - - - - 
Hardison: Yo. No way in hell I could ever imagine getting married. I mean, it's just - It's just a piece of paper.
(Eliot, eating an apple, looks at Hardison)
Hardison: I take it you've never been married.
Eliot: No.
Hardison: Ever come close?
Eliot: No.
Hardison: What was her name?
Eliot: It was a girl I grew up with. But anyway, she married somebody else, so...
Hardison: Hot-hot damn, what did you do?
Eliot: What did I do? I liberated Croatia. (leaves)
Hardison: Oh, see, now, me, I would have just got fat and started up a comic-Book shop. That's you and me right there.
relationship foreshadowing in s1 we love to see it
- - - - - 
Hardison: Now, I know that you're in charge of the bridesmaids' dresses, but why are you wearing one?
Parker: A bridesmaid's dress is like an all-access pass at a wedding. Plus, I kind of said something, and the maid of honor cried. And Sophie said I should make it up to her. 
Hardison: By looking much, much better in the same dress? Yeah, you let me know how that goes.
Parker: Hmm, you really think I look good?
Hardison (pinning flowers on her dress): And now you're perfect
they’re BABIES your honor
- - - - - 
(of course the trashy mom wears a sparkly white dress to her daughter’s wedding) 
- - - - - 
(Eliot walks up to the rest of the team)
Eliot: What is it? I got bacon on.
Parker: The Butcher is here.
Eliot: Does he have the baby lamb chops?
Hardison: No. The butcher of Kiev.
Nate: Think he'll recognize you?
[Flashback]
(flames surrounding them, the Butcher has Eliot by the neck and is trying to cut him with a meat cleaver. Eliot is barely holding him off)
Butcher: I kill you!
[Exterior House]
Eliot: Yeah, I think he'd remember me
I live for wacky eliot flashbacks
- - - - - 
Nate: You're staying? Sophie, Sophie, it's the Butcher of Kiev.
Hardison: Have you ever been to Kiev? The cake-maker of Kiev would whup all our ass. This is the butcher.
Sophie: Uh-Huh.
this isn’t that notable, but it’s funny
- - - - - 
parker smushed up against the glass door ,,, just imagine if anyone saw that lmao
- - - - - 
eliot using a frying pan to fight the butcher of kiev,,, iconique
- - - - - 
we need to start making a list of things that are Specifically Not Weapons™ that eliot uses as weapons:
for this episode, a frying pan, a whisk, an appetizer platter, the platter itself 
- - - - - 
Hardison (eating appetizer): This is pretty good, man.
Eliot: Thanks, man. I squeeze, like, fresh lemon juice on it.
Hardison: Cool. Cool.
(they follow Nate out of the kitchen)
eliot is so genuinely happy when someone finally appreciates his food, you can see it in his face ,,, he starts to love hardison just a little bit for that
- - - - - 
Nate: Did you clear out Moscone’s accounts?
Hardison: I left him five dollars for socks
we love the team being petty
- - - - - 
the girl immediately jumped into parker’s lap at the restaurant I’m soft
- - - - - 
soft chef eliot serving his -friends- family is everything 
- - - - - 
I understand that this was technically supposed to be the third episode, so this would have been their first meal as a family and I stan them so hard for it
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