#btsghostiebingo

[hansolmates]

jjk; off-league

summary; you decide to do a little boudoir photoshoot for yourself—a little sexy lingerie, some bunny ears, maybe even a little nudity to make you feel more body positive about yourself. that little photoshoot doesn’t end up being for yourself anymore when you accidentally send those sexy pictures to your stupidly hot, stupidly talented childhood friend who you haven’t spoken to since middle school graduation.  pairing; photographer!jk x fem!reader genre/warnings; childhood friends to lovers!au, flangst, mutual pining, feelings of insecurity and body image, suggestive language, nudity  w.c; 6.2k a/n: i was feeling a lil meh about this fic after finishing it but a month later it finally makes its debut! for @btsghostiewritersnet​ BGW Bingo Bash! today’s trope is “childhood friends to lovers” which surprisingly isn’t a favorite of mine so it was definitely a challenge to write! 

“C’mon, I need your opinion. Deadass. Don’t just say shit to make me feel better.” 

“Gimmie those nudes, baby girl,” Johnny makes an impeccable fuckboy impersonation, making you feel a little squirmy to your stomach. 

It’s an hour away from being the ass-crack’o-dawn and your impromptu pin-up photoshoot just needs the sexy-star-of-approval from your best friend. Johnny Suh is also up for reasons unmentioned, but you had a feeling his pretty boyfriend is fifty percent of the reason. 

You look at yourself in the mirror, smoothing your frame against the black bodice of the sheer teddy. The only parts that are fully concealed are the parts that don’t matter. The sheer bodice reveals your pert nipples concealed by a thin black mesh, coupled with the deep V in the sweetheart neckline, accented by a little black bow in the dive of your highlighted cleavage. The silky a-line raceways to a set of black garters hugging your thighs, barely hanging onto a pair of lace thigh-highs. 

It doesn’t leave you butt naked, but enough to make you feel confident about yourself. These pictures are for you, and Johnny. And Johnny’s boyfriend if he’s being nosy. 

You tug off the silk bunny ears from your head, flinging it somewhere in your room. The wire started to dig in your brain, giving you a major headache. 

“Sending them now,” you hang up and start compiling the pictures in a folder on Google Drive. Once that’s done you copy the shareable link, sending it to Johnny’s number. It happens all so fast, and you feel kind of giddy. As you were posing for the camera, taking your time to find all the right angles, you felt good, you felt sexy in your little get up. Channeling your inner Ariana Grande was one of your childhood dreams, your fifteen year old self would be proud. 

Five minutes pass, fifteen, and by the twenty-five minute mark you’re pissed. What’s taking Johnny so long? 

Makeup scrubbed clean and face bare, you shuffle in your duvet, far too tired to be waiting up this long. Punching in his number once more, you cry, “Hey! Why haven’t you looked at them yet?” 

“What?” your friend’s voice sounds pebbly through the line. Was Johnny sleeping? “You never sent them!” he whines tiredly. 

“No, I definitely sent them!” you pull the phone away and keep Johnny on call, ready to prove him wrong. 

But to your surprise, the last message you sent to Johnny was this afternoon. 

The most recent message is to a person named John Kook. 

You scream. 

Johnny screams back at you with an equal amount of force, “What the fuck? Did someone break in? Are you being mobbed? See, this is why I wanted to put the baby monitor in your room—” 

“Worse!” you’re well prepared for any break in, but not for this. “I sent my pics to the wrong John!” 

“Well… is he at least cute?” 

“I mean, in the fourth grade he looked pretty cute with that front tooth missing,” you find your output of frustration, your bunny plush, pulling it by the ear and hitting it against the bed. “His name isn’t even John! It was just his English name for a silly project we did in middle school. This is so embarrassing, all I can picture is a twelve-year-old Jungkook mortified from sexual harassment. I basically sent him nudes!” 

“Tasteful nudes.” 

“I’m gonna die.” 

“He’s gonna die, of happiness.” 

Jeon Jungkook was a classmate from elementary through middle school. Time and time again was he the object of your affections, from the first grade at the roller rink to the speech he made at graduation. But really, who cares? You’re old and have a job, and it’s not like you’ve communicated with any of your former classmates. 

Your horror amplifies when the Delivered receipt is changed to Read 3:41AM. 

“Fuck! Fuck me with a fuckin’ fuck nugget he saw it!” you cry, “does he still have my number? What if he deleted my contact, would that be even weirder?” 

“Girl, stop.” Johnny sighs, and you can already picture him running his thumb between his brows. “This doesn’t change anything, alright? You two don’t know each other anymore. Block his number and go to sleep.” 

Johnny leaves you alone after that, and you’re left alone to mull over the implications of sending Jeon Jungkook your nude photoshoot. 

You do block his number, knowing that waiting for a reply would drive you nuts. The one thing that you do which is possibly worse, is look him up on Instagram. 

Of course, he’s stupid hot. 

He doesn’t seem to like being on the receiving end of the camera however, in favor of his timeline being filled with romantic shots of the beach and city. In between the picturesque views and watercolor sunsets do you see glimpses of him and his current life. You can’t help but smile when you see him with his brother and parents during his college graduation, easily towering over all of them. He looks tall with fluffy cocoa hair, big pearly whites gleaming proudly at the camera. He grew up well. 

To torture yourself even more, you even look through his story. Twelve hours ago, he was at the gym lifting weights. Normally, you’d be disgusted by people trying to show off their grunt faces drenched in sweat, but of course Jungkook has to have on a silly smile and pump his fist up after he deadlifts. The sweat clinging to his shirt is also a high plus. His gorgeous display of abs has your hands fluttering over your own belly. Maybe you need to exercise more. 

Four hours ago, you see him and a pretty woman with their cheeks squished together, using the puppy filter. Of course he has a girlfriend. 

Reluctant, you open up your Google Drive and scroll through your photoshoot. Deflated, you frown at the pictures that once made you beam with pride, picking at every little detail that bothered you. You really can’t believe you sent these to Jeon Jungkook, no longer a fourth grader with one front tooth, but a man way out of your league. 

By the time you will yourself to sleep, the sun peeks from the horizon, telling you to move on. 

“Hey Gyu,” you tiptoe over to the table much too small for Mingyu’s frame. The string bean is slumped over his iPad pro, drawing intently at some chibi OCs. “Got a plot for that one?” you ask, pointing at the little pink and blue creature decorating the screen. 

Mingyu grunts in reply, obviously engrossed. It isn’t until you slide him a matcha frappe from Starbucks that he becomes intelligible, muttering a “thank you” as he blends with his pen. 

Sensing that it’s going to be awhile before you get through to him, you take your usual rounds around the front desk and lobby of the cosy photo studio. There’s pretty pictures of Mingyu’s work, along with the other employees Minghao and Hoseok. Each section of the wall features a different taste of each person’s interest. Mingyu is a divine lover of soft bed sheets and hot tea, many of his photographs and paintings featuring cafes or perfectly messy beds you’ve seen on hotel advertisements. Minghao is a tasteful artisan, splotches of color retaliating against neutral backgrounds. Finally, Hoseok manages to find balance in the people, large cityscapes telling both large and small stories.

“Alright,” Mingyu’s deep voice forces you to curl your head, where he’s sipping at his drink with haste. “What’cha here for?” 

You frown, “Don’t you remember? I told you last week I’d be stopping by to get my photos developed,” you gesture to the Pentax in your hands, an heirloom from your great-aunt. While you did take digital photos for sending them to Johnny, the ones you wanted developed were taken side-by-side with the film camera. You figured that film would give a little more authenticity to your photoshoot. 

“Shit, that’s today?” the camera falls like deadweight, slapping against your sweater as you watch Mingyu frantically look through his digital calendar. He looks at you, dejected. “How many prints?” 

“I don’t know, maybe like six. Or eight?” 

“That’s gonna take too long, I’m heading down to Hidden Grounds for a vision meeting at two.” 

“Alright, I’m free all day. What about after?”

“Nah, you came all this way. I can just let the new guy help you.” and Mingyu makes a show of cupping his hands in the direction of the open hallway, “Yah, Jeon Jungkook! Get your cute ass out here!” 

The Pentax around your neck suddenly feels like weight akin to a two-ton boulder, and you surge forward, not caring that the corner of the table is digging into your belly. “Mingyu,” you garble, and Mingyu is shell-shocked by the desperation in your eyes. “Isn’t Minghao around or something? Or I can come back another time? These photos are really personal and I don’t feel comfortable having a stranger see them.”

“What? We’re professionals, don’t belittle us.” 

“No, seriously,” you whine, you tug at the collar of his denim jacket, noses practically touching. “These pictures are different. My tits are out and my legs are spread—”

“—interrupting something?” 

You hear some shuffling, and you turn around to see Jeon Jungkook’s back, comically turned to face the entrance. 

And damn, he did have a cute ass. Nothing is going to hide the glory in those jeans, absolutely nothing. 

“Hilarious,” Mingyu drawls, and you push him away. “Forget it, Kook. She doesn’t feel comfortable letting a stranger develop her photos.” 

Sensing that it’s safe to turn around, you watch as his black bangs flutter as he faces you. You hope your body language doesn’t betray how you’re really feeling, because you are a mere mortal and you’re weak in the presence of god-like figures. 

“Oh, what a relief then,” he smiles at you, and his voice sounds like honey. If there was malice or surprise in his tone, his good-natured expression betrays it. “Because I’ve known this friend since elementary school. We go way back.” 

You ignore the burn in the back of your head, as you are positive Mingyu knows you’re hiding something. 

“Really, what a coincidence.” Mingyu replies carefully, and you feel utterly stuck between these men and their banter, locked up like cream in an Oreo cookie. 

Nothing argues against Jungkook as he easily weaves through the thick wave of awkwardness, hands reaching out to touch your camera. “Wow,” he marvels, holding the object in his hands, “my dad has one of these.” 

“A-ha,” you take a step back, only to bump into the corner of the table, again. Ouch. “It’s okay, Jungkook. I’m actually busy today so I can come when Mingyu’s free–”

“Oh, I thought you were free all day,” Mingyu drawls, looking up through his lashes as he sips languidly at his drink. 

“Don’t worry about it,” Jungkook says good-naturedly, as if Mingyu just didn’t out you. “We got a lot of catching up to do anyway, c’mon.” 

Jungkook moves to place a hand in the small of your back and that’s enough to get you to rev up. Refusing to let any contact get between the two of you, you zip ahead down the familiar hallway, turning your head to catch Mingyu grinning with all canines, shooing you with his fingers like a puppy. 

You send Mingyu a stream of “fuck yous” into his inbox for later, unwilling to settle with this curse. Busying yourself with your phone, you avoid eye contact with Jungkook until you reach the dark room. The red light turned off at the top of the doorhenge signals that the room is not in use. Jungkook makes a move to open the door and that’s when you pounce, blocking the doorway with your small body. It’s comical, really. 

Jungkook raises a brow at you, but says nothing. 

“I really can wait, Jungkook,” you steel yourself, forcing a sympathetic smile. “I’m sure your girlfriend wouldn’t like you developing my pictures—”

It’s then that his pretty cupid’s bow unfurls into a full-fledged grin. “Girlfriend... you’ve been keeping tabs on me?” 

“Fuck, well I had to!” your face is as red as the dark room’s alert light, now on because Jungkook flicked the switch and he’s between your arm to unlock the door. Your hand brushes his as you both reach the knob. “I’m really really sorry I sent those pictures. They were for Johnny—you remember Johnny Suh from English class? And I saved you in my contacts as “John Kook” so it was an honest mess up.” 

Jungkook hums, so light that the breathiness in his chords flutters your grip on the knob. He forces the door ajar, and you’re left to follow him in the dark room, cluttered with solutions and fancy equipment. 

“Thought so,” Jungkook shrugged, giving a one-over at the materials in the room, mulling over his next steps in developing your film. 

You’re still petrified at the doorway, holding your Pentax between both hands like a lifeline. Jungkook’s head lols to you, and you get a pretty view of the way his bangs brush over his forehead, Adam’s Apple bobbing. His expression is a little tired, but overall unreadable. He sighs your name, lethargic. 

“We’re already here, so might as well get this done,” he gestures to the camera in your vice grip. “Do you wanna pick the shots or do you want me to?” 

He’s already seen the digitals, what’s so different about getting a couple prints? With a slight pout you drag your feet over to him, relinquishing your camera. “I’m thinking you have a better eye for this than I do.” 

“You think right.” 

You fight the urge to roll your eyes. Cocky, but what you’ve seen on Instagram definitely justifies his sentiment. Jungkook pays no mind to you, busying his hands with the various containers in front of him, measuring the solutions for the developer, stopper, and fixer. You were always entranced by the process of developing film, especially in highschool where their photography club holed themselves in the darkroom like a secret lair. 

“Alright,” he pops open the canister, carefully laying out sections of the film in groups of four. “Want me to pick a random one for a tester?” 

You frown, “At least put some thought into it.” 

“Always,” it looks like he already decided way before he popped the question, immediately taking a negative and placing it in the carrier. 

His fingers are nimble as he takes the time to clean off the dust and any debris that could potentially ruin the image. Then he turns off the lights and begins the process. You dive around him, trying to keep your distance but still too curious to leave his side. If he’s annoyed he fails to show it, in favor of humming whatever song comes from his Echo Dot. 

You always got the solos in choir. You wanted to reminisce, but you’re too nervous to say it out loud. 

Even though it’s his job and he’s being a professional, you romanticize the experience, watching as he carefully puts the print in each liquid process. Your image blooms to life, and you feel your stomach churn as the photo develops before your eyes. 

After a final dip in the solution stopper, he places the first product in a bath of water. Even though you are mere centimeters away, you can clearly see the image of you swimming around the container. 

“Alright!” Jungkook hangs the finished picture on a pastel pink clothespin, tacking it in place. “Whaddya think?” 

Your breath catches in your throat, feeling heavy as you look at the image of you reflected in the glossy paper. You’re perched on your bed, a hand splaying between your legs as the other hand toys with the silk bunny ears. You’re leaned slightly, giving an ample view of your cleavage. However, the image of you is definitely different from being blown up in comparison to the negatives, and you squirm uncomfortably at your full display. 

“I look,” you bite your tongue, internally debating whether you like it or not. Not to spare Jungkook the theatrics you shrug, “It’s good.”  

The lack of enthusiasm seems to dissatisfy Jungkook however, as he has to take a double take and look back and forth between the image and the real thing. “What’s wrong with it, do you think Johnny’ll not like it?” 

“What?” you furrow your brows, breaking into a nervous laugh. “Johnny has a boyfriend. I just wanted his opinion. This photoshoot is for me, y’know? Just something to make me feel good about myself.” 

Jungkook’s lips morph into a little ‘o’, and you see a little bit of the child you once knew in the way he’s mulling over the situation. 

“Then can I give you my honest opinion?” Jungkook clips off the half-dried photo, holding it between you two. “Stop thinking so hard about every little thing you don’t like about yourself. If I was your boyfriend and you gifted this to me, I’d be creaming my pants. You look fucking sexy, all grown up since you cried in the fourth grade.” 

You’ve just been flung a litany of words you have no brain capacity to digest. Along with that, the immense heat you didn’t know you’ve been suppressing surges to your belly, low and simmering. Jungkook stares at you in earnest, despite his sudden gush of honesty, you don’t know what to say. There’s a dash of pink staining his cheeks, betraying the confidence he previously displayed. He stiffens when you don’t reply immediately and moves to clean his materials, his sudden bout of bold honesty quickly shrinking. 

“Y-you know,” you look down at your feet, “the only reason why I cried in the fourth grade was because you told me Santa wasn’t real.” 

Jungkook softens, tilting his head. “Sorry about that.” 

“Thanks though,” you gently reach for the photo in Jungkook’s grasp, looking at it without contempt. “But won’t your girlfriend be upset if she knew you were saying things like this about someone else?” 

He chuckles, shaking his head. “Well, if you looked through the rest of my Instagram story,” Jungkooks cards a hand through his already mussed hair, splitting the ends. “You would see that she’s not my girlfriend, but my tattoo artist.” 

For added measure, he wiggles his fingers in front of you, revealing pretty ink and silver bands across his knuckles.

“Oh,” your voice is feather light, and you’re sure you’re drooling as you stare far too long at the letters that mark his hands, curious as to what they symbolize. 

“So, as a singleton telling another singleton,” he continues, “I know it’s meaningless if you don’t believe it yourself, but I’m telling you, you’re attractive.” 

“Thanks,” you hold the picture tightly in your grasp, eyes flickering to the negatives in the room ready to be galvanized into a full-fledged picture. “Why don’t we wrap this up, huh? We can continue another time.” 

If he notices how much the paper wilts in your grasp, he doesn’t comment on it. “Are you sure? I know it takes a lot of time, but I don’t mind.” 

“I’m sure,” you force a smile, one hand on the lightswitch. “I’ll let you know when I’m ready, okay?” 

Jungkook swallows, nodding mechanically. “Okay.” 

“It was really nice seeing you, Kook.” you blurt before you could chicken out, letting the room bask in darkness a little longer so he can’t see your flustered state. “I’m not even going to downplay it, you look great.” 

You half-expect a cocky remark, or a little chest pumping from the compliment. At the sound of his nickname however, 4th grade Jeon Jungkook resurfaces and he shoves his hands in his pockets. “Like I said, so do you,” he replies easily, sending you a soft smile and opening the door for you. 

The door closes shut behind you and you exhale, patting your cheeks and willing for the chilly air to calm you down. 

When you get home that day, you shuck off all your clothes and crawl into bed. You cry out when the metal framing of your bunny ears stabs you in the back, and you fling it to some unmentionable part of the room. You reach for a bag of half-opened sour gummy worms, flipping open your MacBook to continue streaming the soft magical girl anime you’ve been hooked on these past few weeks. 

Not even Sailor Uranus can distract you; however, by the time it’s dark and you’ve run out of distractions, you finally pull the plug and unblock Jungkook from your list of contacts. 

Your phone buzzes, the incessant vibration relaying all the messages you’ve missed. 

[March 12th, 3:53AM]

You: https://drive.google.com/drive/u/1/folders/0343…

John Kook: ??? 

John Kook: you probably sent this to me by accident… sorry i clicked on it

John Kook: is it weird if i said you’ve done a massive glow up since the middle school dance?

[March 12th, 12:02 PM]

John Kook: are u mad

John Kook: you’re mad

John Kook: am i makin this weird by continuing to text you

John Kook: im making it weird. 

[March 31st, 6:24 PM]

John Kook: https://drive.google.com/drive/u/1/folders/049…

You tilt your head at the folder link, it was sent only a few hours ago. With a click, you’re enlightened to a set of digital photos. Your photos from your photoshoot, but not quite. They’ve been expertly edited, not too much to distort your looks, but only to enhance your features. A small, barely there smile creeps from your subconscious, ultimately touched by the gesture. 

John Kook: sorry if i pushed too hard today. 

Guilt overrides your nerves, prompting you to immediately press the call button on his contact. Not to your surprise, Jungkook’s light voice calls your name through the line after the second ring. 

“Don’t be sorry,” you blurt, forgoing the hellos. “It was the right amount of push, I feel better, really. If anything, I’m sorry. I blocked your number because I was scared to read your reaction.” 

You hear him sigh along the line, and you feel that breath ripple through your nerves, as if he’s right next to you. “It’s fine, I would’ve done the same thing.” 

“The pictures you just sent, they’re really beautiful. You did a good job.” 

“Thanks, I had a bit of help. I didn’t have to do much.” 

“Oh, did Mingyu come back from his meeting?” 

"No, I uh," Jungkook chuckles, and while you don't really know why, the sound is nonetheless pleasant. “It was mostly the lighting and coloring I fixed up. Didn’t need to do much since you already looked so pretty as it is.” 

You choke on your saliva. 

“You okay?”

“Y-yeah,” you cough, “just choked on a snack I was eating.” he hums in reply, and you pray he doesn’t hear your stomach fervently retort that you haven’t eaten since lunch. “So, I think I’m up for developing more of the film. When can I drop by?” 

“I’m free Saturday,” Jungkook chirps, “I have a shoot until noon but you can come anytime after that.” 

“Sounds good, I’ll be there,” you clutch the phone with both hands. “I can bring lunch. What do you like to eat?” 

“Oh, you don’t have to do that.”

“I’m already buying for Minghao,” you lie, “do you like burgers?” 

“I can’t say no to a good burger,” Jungkook’s smile feels almost palpable against the line, “do you remember our field trip to the national museum of history? We had burgers on the street!” 

“Oh, those were so good,” you moan, fuzzy memories of a middle grade field trip resurfacing to clarity, “but you ate like, ten of them!”

“I still get nightmares,” he warns, “don’t let me go to bed like this.” 

You giggle, letting your body meld further into your warm mattress. “Maybe I’ll just show up with ten burgers for you tomorrow.” 

“I’ll throw up on you, try me.” 

Minghao’s adjusting the frames on their display wall by the centimeter, and it’s pissing him off. 

“Ah, it’s off,” he mutters to himself when you walk in, indicated by the electronic bell. He turns to you briefly, pulling a leveler out of his overall pocket. “Doesn’t this look off?” 

“Uh,” you look towards Mingyu at the front desk, who is paying no mind as he continues scribbling on his iPad. You tilt your head towards your former college classmate. “It doesn’t look off from over here?” 

Tacking the leveler on one of the frames, he whines, “It’s five degrees off.” 

Mingyu puts his pen down to reach over the counter and grab the paper from your hands, steaming with the scent of fast food, “He’s been like this for hours, don’t mind him.” 

He doesn’t even ask whether the food is his, Mingyu sees grease and he claims. Reaching for an oil-wrapped parchment, he unfolds the paper to reveal a handsome burger with all the fix-ens. 

Barely satisfied, Minghao steps away from the art display. There is a sizable gap in the display, now divided between four artists instead of three. You wonder how Jungkook’s work will look amongst the other artists. 

“Cute ‘fit.” Minghao mumbles, nodding approvingly at your clothes as he digs into the bag for his own burger. 

You send a half-smile his way. If an outfit is Minghao-approved, that means you’ve gone above and beyond. At least, you tried to play it off like you didn’t try to look cute. It’s not like you’re intimidated by Jungkook, living with a major fifteen-year glow up. After all, he’s already seen more than you can imagine. 

Mingyu takes notice, eyes going south to where your white blouse meets your cleavage. You hurl a fry at his face, “Eyes up here, perv.” 

He scrunches his nose, lifting a greasy thumb to slide a manila envelope over to you. “Here’s the developed pictures. Intercepted Kook and I finished them this morning.” 

You frown, “Jungkook’s not done with his photoshoot yet?” 

“Oh, he’s been done.” Mingyu’s eyes roll back to one of the studios. “But I’m saying is, you got what you needed. So you can leave if you want,” but he grins at you, canines so sharp you feel his stare jabbing you in the proverbial neck. “Unlesssss you want to go in and say hi.” 

If he has any inkling of what’s going on in your head, it’s definitely confirmed when your face turns hot. Damn body, you’re betraying me! With a flourish you grab the fries from under Mingyu’s nose, along with whatever’s left in the fast food bag. 

Minghao’s smiling through his burger, knowing if he pulls any type of savagery his lunch would certainly be pulled from under his chin. 

“Whatever you’re thinking, drop it or the burger will be going in your ass instead of out.” You mean to sound menacing, but the Min-squared and their boisterous laughter follow you down the hallway and into the occupied studio. 

“Hey Jungkoo—wow.”

You’re sure you look like Alice, enthralled by the little wonderland she just stepped into. The set is beautiful, right out of a fairytale. It has a very old-romance vibe, like Morticia and Gomez Addams. There lay a couch made of the darkest, richest wood, with velvet red cushions covering the body. Across the floor laid hundreds of black rose petals, blanketing the floor in a sea of ebony. 

“It’s for a wedding, gothic themed.” Jungkook supplies helpfully, still fiddling with whatever he was looking on his digital camera. He’s looking utterly soft in a matching grey sweat combination, something that would easily disgust you during high school, but unfairly works with him. 

“The shoot must’ve been beautiful.” 

“It was.” 

“I uh, got this for you.” Your fingers start to sweat from clutching the bag so hard, and you place it on his work table. 

He finally looks up from his camera, giving you a wan smile. “I thought you got those for Minghao.” 

You mentally slap your cheeks, trying to ignore the way his smile made your stomach do somersaults. “He got his own. Your portion has a cookie in it, so.” 

His cute teeth unveil themselves at the mention of sweets, and you can’t help but smile back at the familiarity. 

The two of you take your time in enjoying your lunch, not meaning to stay but the very back of your mind hoping he’d like to share a meal with you. After all, Mingyu and Minghao are probably at the front relishing in your very obvious attraction. What can you say, first crushes never die. 

Between sips of your milkshake, you’ve taken to flipping through Jungkook’s portfolio. There’s a myriad of different subjects: beaches, people, the occasional squirrel. Each section of the portfolio feels like you’re being transported to a new side of Jungkook and his artistry, and you ached to know more. 

“Wow,” you point at an action shot of two girls in a dance studio, “this duo looks like Chungha and Hyoyeon.” 

He swallows his (second) burger, having the audacity to sink sheepishly in his sweater. “It is Chungha and Hyoyeon.” 

You nearly choke on your cookie. “That’s amazing.” you say breathlessly, looking closer at the image. In fact, the beautiful women photographed are famed hip-hop choreographers Chungha and Hyoyeon. You can’t imagine how good Jungkook must be to manage a photoshoot with them. 

As proud as you are of Jungkook, it reminds you that since middle school you two have lived completely different lives. You wonder if Jungkook gets these kinds of gigs all the time, hanging around with gorgeous, talented people like himself.

Jungkook says your name once, twice. He looks at you concerned, and you’re melting in his large carmine eyes. If he notices your usual overthinking, he doesn’t say anything, and gestures to the section at the end of his portfolio. “This isn’t my best work, but it’s one of my favorites.” 

There’s something familiar about this set. A playground with a busted swing set. Children riding on bikes and colorful class shirts. Ice cream melting on fists. 

Thirteen-year-old you hanging on top of your middle school’s leafless tree, clutching your baseball cap as you shade yourself from the sunset. 

“Was this the first time you took pictures?” you ask, thumbing the picture of yourself. 

“Yeah. It’s when I decided it’s what I wanted to do the rest of my life.” 

“I know we didn’t know each other that well and we’ve only recently connected but,” you give him a shy smile, “I’m really proud of what you’ve grown up to be, Jungkook.” 

He looks like you’ve hung him the moon and stars, his half-eaten burger loosening in his grasp. His lips are parted cutely, like a kitten who’s just been offered a fresh glass of milk. You cough at the sudden pause in conversation, feeling self-conscious of your impulse confession. You don’t even have it in you to be disgusted when Jungkook hastily shoves the second half of his burger down his throat, tips of his ears pink. 

Leaving him be, you press a palm to your cheek, looking at the wedding set. 

Jungkook downs half a water bottle before he speaks again. “Y’know, it would be a shame to clean up this set already. It was kind of expensive.” 

“Yeah,” you echo, standing up and kicking off your slippers. You kick your feet in the air, watching the black petals kiss across your ankles.

“I have an idea,” he wipes his hands on his sweats, “why don’t you go back home and get an outfit you really like. Lingerie, a cute outfit, whatever. Let me give you a photoshoot you’d love.” 

You look up from your petal dance, balking. “Jungkook! That’s not necessary, I told you the photos I took were okay.” 

“Yeah but, you didn’t seem entirely happy. C’mon, I got a camera and a beautiful set. Why waste it?” his hands naturally gravitate towards his charging camera, already turning it on. “I can do lighting, I know all your good angles. What’s stopping us?” 

Really, what’s stopping you? Your hands fiddle with your open flannel, the soft material comforting you as you look across the set. You try to imagine yourself, your body draped across the velvet pillows and black petals. Would it look good? Would you feel good? You think back to how you felt the first time, how scared you were when someone other than Johnny would be looking at your photos. You remember how something weird and sour contorted in your stomach when you scrolled through Jeon Jungkook’s Instagram, no longer the little boy you knew but a man who could have everything he wanted—

“Stop thinking about it.” Jungkook suddenly snaps, and you break from your reverie to catch him looking upset. It’s been awhile since you’ve seen him like that. 

“Thinking about what?”

“Thinking that you’re out of my league.”

“Excuse me?” 

“You were like this the other day too,” and he looks sad, and puts his camera down to come closer to you. “Why are you feeling this way. Is it me?” 

“Not necessarily,” you huff, hugging yourself.

“Do you not feel beautiful? Do you not like your body?” 

“No, I do.” you say to yourself, and you mean it. Even though there will inevitably be days where you may not feel one-hundred percent positive about yourself, you know at the end of the day, you love you and all its parts. “I don’t know, Jungkook. I had no problem letting Mingyu develop the photos originally, because he knew me in college and I was already sure of myself back then. But I guess when I sent them to you, I felt like I did when I was a little girl, y’know? Going through puberty, and worrying about what other people think.” 

And it’s not like Jungkook teased you or made you feel lesser of yourself. In fact, Jungkook was the student you wanted to be when you were younger. Someone sweet and caring, and unabashedly confident about himself. 

“I guess seeing you so successful and the fact that my stupid childhood crush came back from a time where I always felt low, made me feel a little insecure again.” 

Something sinks in and you feel hyper aware of how crushed Jungkook looks at your declaration. “There’s no leagues, you got that?” he says quietly, walking so close that he’s hovering over you, sneakers brushing. “I get it. I get unsure and insecure just like you. Hell, I was nervous this morning, wondering if you’d really come. We may not feel insecure over the same things, but middle school wasn’t that great for me either.” He makes a funny face, and you feel a smile twitch across your lips. “But it’s okay. Because we’re human and we grow. But now, you are successful. You’ve grown from your time growing up and you’re a wonderful, powerful person. I’m proud of you too.” 

“I know,” you mumble, leaning your forehead against his chest. His arms wrap around you in response, holding you snug.

“And for the record, I thought you were the most beautiful person in the world in fourth grade. Even though my world was pretty small back then, I can say now that what I thought back then still stands true.” 

You look up from his embrace, where he’s leaning down to press a slow, cotton soft kiss to your forehead. He backs up a little to read your face, and you give a tiny nod in response to signal it’s okay. Jungkook exhales in contentment, relaxing against your frame. 

“Thanks, Kook,” you crack a smile, feeling your insecurities slowly evaporate. You feel better, light, knowing that these negative feelings are only temporary, and you’re not alone. Being in Jungkook’s arms, an honest boy turned man you’ve known all your life, it feels almost like home. 

You two stay like this for a while. Exchanging feather-like kisses, feeling irrevocably young and hopeful. Suddenly feeling emboldened, you tug him by the strings of his hoodie to press a long, hot kiss to his lips. There’s a stutter, and you’re pretty sure Jungkook choked on his saliva at the sudden change of pace but you continue, letting Jungkook catch up and follow your lead. 

“Wow,” Jungkook pulls away and his lips are shiny and flushed. Adorable. You think 7th grade Jungkook would be rolling in his Naruto sheets if he knew you two would inevitably end up together. Conversely, 7th grade you would be squealing in your kitten plushie, proud that you managed to nab your childhood crush to live out all the fantasies you’ve imagined since the 4th grade. 

“Jungkook,” you let your flannel fall to the floor in a heap, only leaving your baby blue top in a thin ruched camisole. “I think I want to do the photoshoot. Can’t pass up these pretty petals, y’know?” 

He runs a hand through his hair, gaping. “Really?” 

“Yeah,” you press a wet kiss to his neck, “anyway you want me, baby. Full creative control. I want you to like this as much as I do, okay?” 

With the permission to hold the wheel, Jungkook’s lightheaded and spinning. His eyes rake up and down your gorgeous form, wondering how many good deeds he’s done in his past life to earn a right just as this. 

“In that case,” he presses a palm to your shoulder, pushing you to sit along the velvet cushion, “strip for me.” 

#jungkook fic #btsghostiebingo #goldenclosetnet #jungkook fluff #jungkook smut #bts fic #bts scenarios #jungkook scenarios #jungkook x reader

[jingabitch]

To Love an Empress

SUMMARY: Despite the acrimonious beginning to your relationship, Yoongi is drawn to you.

PAIRING: emperor!yoongi x empress!reader

RATING: E

WARNINGS: smut | unprotected sex (they’re husband and wife and also this is a historical au so there are no condoms but be safe okay) | references to war | yoongi’s scar is discussed | yoongi kills a man (mentioned but not explicit) | secret admirer stuff

WORD COUNT: 9.8k

A/N: My final submission for the BTS Ghostie bingo, yay! This one fills the secret admirer tile. This fic is kind of based on Henry VII and Elizabeth of York’s early relationship, and inspired by The White Princess, so if some of the dialogue and scenes are similar, that’s why. 

Shoutout to my lovely betas @knjkitten and @yoongs-jeontae for helping me beta this! Banner by @jkeuphoriadreamland​ 💕 i’ve never had a banner on a fic before this is fun hehe

Min Yoongi was a hard man, and he knew it. He’d won his throne on the battlefield, running his sword through the old king and crowning himself right there on the blood-stained grass.

You knew it too, could never forget it when you looked at your husband. The scar on his face from an injury he’d sustained during the decisive battle for his crown; the memory of how coldly he’d treated you at the beginning; the baby growing inside you as a result of Yoongi’s insistence that you demonstrate your ability to provide him with heirs before he would marry you. As if he’d had a choice, when your bloodline was the cornerstone of his legitimacy.

After all the angry words and hostility between the two of you, he knew there was no chance you would forgive him. And yet, a part of him craved it. He saw the kindness you lavished on your ladies-in-waiting, the servants, and all the children running around the palace who were sons and daughters of the nobles and the army of servants working here. Was it so wrong of him to want just a little of that for himself? You were his wife, after all.

Yoongi was a warrior. He’d trained all his life to take control of the kingdom. War was all he knew.

Which made him, unfortunately, woefully inept when it came to wooing a lady, especially one so resistant to him. He’d relied on his looks before, but now that he had the scar on his face, it seemed that even that tool was no longer at his disposal. God knows you hated it.

With no one else to turn to, he asked his eunuch what he should do. At first, the portly man just blinked at him, confused. “She’s your wife, you don’t have to persuade her to warm your bed,” he pointed out.

Yoongi grimaced. “I know that,” he grumbled. “I want her to like me.”

Sambo snorted. “Should have thought about that before you made her ‘prove her fertility’ to you.”

Sulking, Yoongi got up and stormed away from his eunuch. Obviously, he knew that, and he wished that no one else did. It wasn’t like him to force a lady like that, but tensions had been running high at the time and he hadn’t trusted a woman from the house of L/n. You must have run to your lady-in-waiting and cried to her when it was over, because Sambo had gotten quite the shelling from her the next day.

Sambo, who’d quickly grown used to the antics of his master, just hurried along beside Yoongi. “Just give her something pretty,” he advised. “Women like that.”

Yoongi stopped short. Why hadn’t he thought of that? “That’s a great idea,” he enthused. “You’re useful for once, Sambo,” he praised his eunuch.

Sambo rolled his eyes to hide his pleased smile. “You’d think a grown man would know something like that,” he jibed. “Taking love advice from someone who can’t even perform must be a new low for you.”

“Whatever.” Yoongi waved off the insult. “I’ll get her a nice hairpin,” he decided. “But don’t tell her it’s from me.” He didn’t want you throwing it out in disgust.

“She’s obviously going to know,” Sambo pointed out. “There is no man in Joseon suicidal enough to woo the empress. That’s treason.”

Frowning, Yoongi snapped, “Just do it,” before stalking back into his room with a huff and shutting the door in Sambo’s face. The eunuch really didn’t need to rain on his parade like that, even if he was probably right. Hopefully you wouldn’t immediately come to the conclusion that it was him. It wasn’t just that he was afraid you’d throw out a gift from him—he wanted to make you smile. Not because you were bound to him and might as well exhibit some fondness towards your husband, but because he was really, truly capable of making you happy.

---------------------------------

Pregnancy had been difficult for you so far. Without your mother around, you were left to go through it by yourself. At least Ling, your personal servant-turned-lady-in-waiting, was here with you. You’d been together since you were a child and she was a young teen, and she was like a sister to you.

The morning sickness was starting to fade, thankfully, but you still got nauseous sometimes, so Ling suggested that you have your breakfast in the courtyard to enjoy some fresh air and sunshine while the cleaners dusted and polished your quarters.

When you finally got back to your room after being bullied by Ling into taking a little walk – exercise was good for the baby, she insisted – there was a hairpin lying on your table, next to the novel you’d been reading. Curiously, you knelt down to pick it up.

“What’s this?” you asked Ling, who was trailing a few steps behind you.

“It’s a hairpin, milady,” she responded somewhat cluelessly.

“Yes,” you said patiently, “but why is it here? I’ve never seen this before.” Looking more closely at it, you turned it over a few times in your hand. It truly was pretty, a delicate gold phoenix carved into the end of the pin, decorated with pink flowers and milky jade balls around the base of the phoenix.

Sitting down on the other side of the table, Ling pulled your hand holding the pin closer to her so she could examine it too. “I don’t know, but it’s so pretty,” she sighed. “Maybe you have a secret admirer,” she giggled.

“Yes, the pregnant empress has a secret admirer,” you said drolly. Everything about your existence, from the gilded cage you were trapped in, to your marriage to the most powerful man in Joseon, to the heir you were carrying in you, screamed that you were taken, owned by a man. And not just any man, of course, but the one whose wife was strictly, on pain of death, off-limits.

“Well, you never know,” Ling said lightly. “Just take it for what it is,” she advised. “Someone wants to make you happy!”

“All right,” you accepted skeptically, but you couldn’t quite stop the smile from stealing across your face. After living as a political pawn for so many years because of your family and giving up everything for the man who’d killed your uncle, it did feel nice to think that there was someone out there who liked you for you.

---------------------------------

You weren’t stupid, of course. You had considered that it was your husband who’d had the pin sent to you. It made sense, after all – he was the only man in the whole of Joseon who could do something like that. It didn’t take long for you to disabuse yourself of that notion, however. Yoongi hated you, considered you the snake in his midst. Taking a L/n bride after defeating the House of L/n was the last thing he’d wanted to do, and he’d made that abundantly clear when you met. Hell, even before that, when he’d sent a platoon to your residence in the countryside to retrieve you.

Your first interaction with the new emperor had gone woefully poorly, with cruel words said on both sides.

As angry and resentful as you were about being claimed as his wife, you weren’t in any mood to be supplicant to the new emperor. When they brought you to meet him, in an admittedly charming gazebo, you knelt without bowing or greeting him, refusing to even look straight at him.

“Are you just going to sulk, then?” he drawled, and you barely resisted the urge to strangle him with your bare hands.

“We’ve done nothing right; surely you aren’t insisting that we follow tradition now?” you replied, your light tone doing little to hide your displeasure. This was all wrong, you knew. Despite Ling hovering just out of earshot keeping a watchful eye on things, you knew that your reputation was at stake simply from meeting the emperor alone before you were married.

It was unusual for you to enter the palace knowing that you were to be the empress, too. Usually the empress dowager chose her son’s bride, based on a series of tests that demonstrated her suitability for the throne. But, you knew, you were already the best candidate, purely based on your bloodlines.

Yoongi leaned forward, steepling his fingers in front of him. “Of course not,” he said, and his low, dangerous voice caused your breath to catch as you jerked your head forward to look at him properly for the first time. You couldn’t help but gasp at the long scab slicing through his eye. Catching you staring at it, he smiled bitterly.

“Are you afraid of your fiancé?” he asked.

“Of course not,” you hissed. “Just horrified that I have to lie with a disfigured monster.”

You remembered the way he’d jerked back, as if scalded. Okay, so you weren’t blameless in the current state of affairs you found yourself in, this hateful sham of a marriage that neither of you enjoyed. Still, given the acrimonious relationship you had with your husband, it seemed less than likely that he was your secret admirer.

“Poor, pitiful L/n Y/n,” he responded coldly. “Why don’t we get it over with, then?”

“What?!” you gasped, your hand flying to your mouth.

He smiled at you coldly. “I will not repeat the mistakes of previous emperors,” he informed you, and your lips pursed in displeasure, recognizing his comment for the jibe that it was – most of the previous emperors in the history of the kingdom had been your ancestors. “Having no legitimate heir is a recipe for disaster.”

Despite your best attempts to avoid giving him the satisfaction of your reaction, you couldn’t hold back the blanch. Smirking in satisfaction at having gotten back at you for the cruel insult, he continued, “We will be wed only when you are pregnant.”

Really, after all was said and done, it was no wonder that you and your husband despised each other.

Still, maybe there was a part of you that wished the pin had come from him. It wasn’t that you were in love with Yoongi or something insipid like that, it was just… you were kind of lonely here in the palace, with hardly anyone you knew around. The only person you’d been allowed to bring with you was Ling, because she’d been your servant for so long.

It would be nice to feel, just once more in your life, like you had a friend around you.

---------------------------------

As your pregnancy progressed, you grew increasingly miserable and annoyed, and your secret admirer stepped up his efforts to cheer you up. From pretty flowers on your pillow to new books when you finished your existing ones, even pretty ribbons and once, a bag of a rare tea that was supposed to alleviate morning sickness, this mysterious individual was showing you more care than your own husband.

You rarely saw Yoongi these days, since he was usually busy in the throne hall, setting the country back to rights. Being a woman, you never got to attend the morning meetings and reading of the petitions, but from what you heard, Yoongi wasn’t the most competent politician. It frustrated you to no end – you were the daughter and niece of the past two emperors, had grown up learning about politics, history and economics, and yet your role was basically being a baby incubator while your inexperienced husband was led down all sorts of rabbit holes as the ministers tried to take advantage of the situation to fatten their own coffers.

The last straw came when you heard of a proposed tax increase for the peasants, purportedly to shore up the kingdom’s defenses. You knew Minister Su, who was in charge of defense, was greedy and corrupt, but very eloquent and had many supporters among the cabinet. Overcoming your own reluctance to speak to your husband directly, you stormed into his private quarters one evening, while he was relaxing with a drink.

“Get out,” you ordered his eunuch, who was kneeling by his side.

Sambo looked over at Yoongi, who nodded at him. Once the doors slid shut behind the eunuch, you knelt in front of your husband. Since you were about six months pregnant now, it was difficult for you to maneuver, but you managed. “I need to talk to you,” you told him.

“I gathered that,” he said dryly. “Could this not wait for a more appropriate audience?”

“No,” you rejected him flatly. “I heard that you’re considering a new tax on the peasants.”

“That’s none of your business.” He leaned back slightly and crossed his arms over his chest.

“You should reject the tax proposal, Your Grace,” you said quietly.

“I said, that’s none of your business,” he thundered, slamming his fist down on the table.

You winced, but continued, undeterred. “Minister Su does not have the best interests of the kingdom in mind, Your Grace. There was a bad harvest this year, and the people will not stand for a tax now, especially when they are already so tired of conflict.”

It seemed that bringing up the civil war that had just been fought between Yoongi and your uncle was a bad idea, as he looked even more furious. He sucked in a deep breath to yell at you, but you quickly continued, cutting him off before he could start.

“Your reign is still new, Your Grace, and the people are still unsure about you. Now is the time for generosity, so that they learn to love you.”

“Why does a L/n empress care about whether the people love me? You and your family hate me; you fought a war against me,” he scoffed, leaning back on his hands in a casual pose to show just how little he cared.

Bristling indignantly, you bit back, “You raised an army against my family! You are the usurper! Make no mistake of it, sir, I advise you not because of any attachment to you, but because I care about this kingdom.”

At that, some of the fire left him. “Everyone claims to care about the kingdom, but all they really care about is themselves. Do you think I don’t know that my ministers are watching me, waiting to take advantage? That people are plotting against me as we speak?”

You rolled your eyes. “That’s what it means to be the emperor. My father had the same thing, as did my uncle – from you.” Maybe goading him wasn’t the best thing to do right now, but you were pregnant, uncomfortable and irritated.

“Then how do I know that I can trust you?” he retorted, his frustration with the current situation bleeding through his voice.

You were going to murder this man, you swore. He wouldn’t need to wait for any plot coming from outside the palace walls. How could someone be capable enough to enact a coup against the emperor, and yet so frustratingly dim when it came to politics?

“Because my wagon is tied to yours, you idiot. I am your empress now before I am a L/n woman, and this child I carry inside me is a Min child. Do you think that if your rule fails, I can just go home, and all will be well for me? I will be executed together with you, and so will our child.”

That seemed to shut him up. “I’ll think about it,” he finally allowed grudgingly.

“Thank you,” you said, bowing with your forehead pressed to the back of your palms over the floor.

After you’d left, Yoongi thought about how that was the first time you’d bowed to him. It seemed there was much he didn’t know about his wife.

---------------------------------

The next afternoon, you heard from Ling that the tax on the peasants had been rejected, and a jeweled comb was delivered to your room. This particular gift came directly from Sambo, so you knew that it was from Yoongi, and you accepted it for the apology that it was.

Two weeks later, proof of Minister Su’s corruption and embezzlement came to light, and he was sent into exile. You might have felt slightly smug about it, since you’d hated Minister Su ever since your own father was the emperor, but mostly you felt a little bad for Yoongi, having to deal with something like that so soon after coming to power.

That same night, Yoongi invited you to have dinner with him. Well, it was more like an order, because you weren’t in any position to turn down the emperor, but Ling was excited nonetheless as she got you ready, helping you into your pretty jeogori and braiding your hair into an elaborate bun.

“I’m so happy for you,” she gushed as she stood in front of you, tying the jeogori. “This could be the start of a new relationship between the two of you!”

“You know I can’t get more pregnant, right?” you asked drolly, raising a brow. In fact, you’d pretty much expected him to leave you alone for the rest of the pregnancy and only call on you once you were recovered enough to perform your conjugal duties once more.

“Oh, hush,” she giggled. “I’m sure he wants to see how you’re doing. You are carrying his heir, after all.”

“Sure, that’s me,” you muttered. “The incubator.”

“Be nice,” she admonished. “You want him to like you, so that he’ll give you more privileges. When your son becomes emperor, then you can swan around all day like the crone.” Suffice it to say, neither of you liked your mother-in-law that much.

“I know,” you sighed. “I’m just uncomfortable all the time.” Entering your third trimester of pregnancy, you were having trouble standing around and kneeling on the ground? Impossible. You’d had a table and chair moved into your room so that you could sit comfortably, but as far as you knew, Yoongi still sat on the ground for most of the day.

Ling didn’t know about your late-night meeting with the emperor a few weeks prior, but you wondered if this dinner had something to do with that.

In Yoongi’s room, something similar was happening, as Sambo fussed over his master’s robes.

“Sambo, enough,” Yoongi sighed. “I don’t have to look nice; she’s already my wife.”

Sambo scoffed. “I said the same thing to you about sending her those gifts, but you insisted then too.”

Yoongi glared at his eunuch without saying anything, mostly because he had no argument against that. He knew he shouldn’t have trusted the man; he’d done nothing but tease him about his crush since he found out.

Thankfully, your arrival cut Sambo’s fussing short – yet another thing he had to be grateful to you for, he supposed. It stung a little that his wife apparently knew more about politics than he did, but you seemed to want to help him, so there was that.

“Your Grace,” you greeted, bowing slightly.

“Good evening,” he responded. “Please, sit,” he invited, gesturing towards the table he had brought into his room just for this. He remembered how much you’d struggled with kneeling on the ground, and then getting up, the last time you’d come to visit him, and thought that this would make it easier for you.

You’d seen the table as soon as you entered the room, of course – it was kind of hard to miss, since the room was mostly empty. Accepting his offer with a gracious smile, you sat yourself down and clasped your hands together demurely in your lap. Yoongi sat across from you and nodded at the servant standing in the corner, and that was the signal for the food to start coming in.

To be honest, you’d expected to see Yoongi’s favourite dishes being served tonight, since everything at your wedding banquet had been his favourite foods, so you were pleasantly surprised to note that it was the food you’d been repeatedly requesting due to your cravings instead.

When the servants left, closing the doors after them, Yoongi spoke. “Please eat.” He gestured at the spread, and you acquiesced, picking up your chopsticks.

“Thank you for the advice,” he started.

The food you were holding with your chopsticks fell back onto your bowl of rice as your hand went limp in shock. “Wh-what?” Of all the things he could have said, that was the one you’d been expecting the least. In all honesty, you’d expected something more like admonishment for interfering – and a lack of other punishment that would serve as tacit acknowledgement that you’d been right. It was how your father had been with your mother.

To be fair, it looked like it was costing him dearly to thank you. “You were right about the tax,” he ground out.

“Oh…” You recovered quickly and nodded, graciously accepting his thanks.

“But don’t make a habit of interfering,” he continued. Right… so there was a catch, after all.

You rolled your eyes. “Of course not,” you said sarcastically. “I’m just the brainless baby incubator, after all. It’s not like I grew up here, or have any knowledge and experience of palace politics, or anything of the sort.”

“You’re a woman—” he thundered, slamming his chopsticks down on the table.

“I am your empress,” you cut him off. “You insisted on marrying me precisely because of my bloodline, so I will not be sidelined, especially when we both know you could use all the help you can get!”

“Help that I can get from my advisors,” he huffed.

“One of your ministers was literally just exiled for corruption, so I don’t know why you want to throw in your lot with them, but sure.” You rolled your eyes. “Now, if that was all, I think I can take my meal in my own quarters tonight.”

Unfortunately, your dramatic exit was foiled by how much you struggled to get out of your seat. Biting back his smile at how cute you looked with your belly, Yoongi leapt to your aid – you were, after all, still his wife and carrying his child, so it was the least he could do.

You pinned him with a glare as he got up to assist you, but were left with no choice but to accept, holding on to his proffered arm and letting him basically hoist you up. “If you need anything…” he started, looking slightly contrite.

“Don’t worry, Your Grace,” you said. “I might be ‘just a woman’ –” your tone made it clear that you were mocking him, and he had the grace to look slightly chagrined – “but I am the empress, and I am carrying the heir to Joseon, so I get everything I ask for.”

“Good, that’s good…” he looked slightly shifty now, and you couldn’t help but feel a little bad for him. He’d been acting like a bit of a dick, but to be fair, you supposed, it wasn’t like his attitude was uncommon. With Ling’s reminder ringing in your ears, you took his hand and brought it to the swell of your belly. Your child was strong and healthy, and even through the layers of your clothes Yoongi could feel the flutter of kicks.

“Wow…” he looked entranced, and you couldn’t help but smile at him. Your child had been conceived in hatred and anger, but you were determined that you would not raise him in that environment. No, he would know only love. You were sure of it.

---------------------------------

Even though the dinner hadn’t gone according to plan, it was still somewhat of a shift in your relationship with your husband. Now when your paths crossed, he smiled at you instead of just walking by stonily.

The gifts from your secret admirer continued too, which made things kind of confusing for you. On the one hand, you were trying to make this thing with your husband work, if only so that your child could grow up in a positive environment. It was difficult enough growing up in the palace, something you were keenly aware of.

And yet, the continued attention from this unknown person was starting to tug at your heartstrings. You hardly knew who it was but being shown kindness without any ulterior motive was certainly enough for you to think fondly of your secret admirer. He didn’t send gifts that often, usually once every other week or so, but each one brought a smile to your face. Sometimes it was your favourite flower, or a snack from another part of the world, or a cute trinket from the market, but all of them were equally dear to you.

The fluttering feeling that you got in your chest when you saw that he’d left you another gift was somewhat tempered by the guilt over the whole situation. Were you allowed to enjoy this attention? You looked furtively around, slightly worried that someone was going to knock the Japanese cakes out of your hand.

“You know,” Sambo said, standing next to Yoongi, who was peering at you from his hidden position behind a wall, “Some of your subjects might find it unseemly for their emperor to spend his days spying on his wife.”

“Shut up,” Yoongi grumbled, although the words had no heat to them, given how distracted he currently was. He hoped you liked the cakes.

“If you want to spend time with her, you can just ask, you know,” Sambo pointed out. “Haven’t you two been getting along better lately?”

“She still gets annoyed at me every time,” he sighed. “I don’t want to upset her, she looks miserable enough as is.”

Sambo, watching you rub the small of your back as Ling fussed over you, had to agree. At eight months pregnant, you looked fit to pop. “Well, she’ll give birth soon, and then things will be better,” he said, patting the emperor on the back. “You really need to be more discreet, though. She can tell it’s you from a mile away.”

Yoongi looked over at Sambo and scowled. “No way,” he denied.

“Really? So there are lots of men walking around decked out in the emperor’s robes, and have blonde hair, then?”

“Fine.” Yoongi sulked. “Let’s go, then.”

“You know you have a bunch of petitions to review, right?”

“I get it.”

---------------------------------

To put it mildly, labour sucked. But at the end of it, you had a beautiful little boy, handed to you wrapped in a blanket. “Wow,” you marveled at your son, stroking his cheek with your thumb as you cuddled him close. Your own dear boy. Cradling him in your arms, it hardly mattered that he was a Min, that he represented the end of your house on the throne. Your son was all that mattered now.

Looking up, you saw Yoongi hovering by the entrance to the room, looking on hesitantly, as if he wasn’t sure if he would be welcome. The idea was laughable to you – he was the emperor, there was nowhere he couldn’t go. You remembered your own father striding around as if he owned the place, because he did. No matter how fond he’d been of your mother, it had always been clear in the way he acted that he knew he was the boss. At best, she was a favoured subordinate.

You could see some of that attitude in Yoongi, and you accepted it – that was how men were, after all. But sometimes, peeking through the haughty exterior, you caught glimpses of someone kind and considerate. Someone you could grow fond of.

“Come in and meet him,” you invited.

As he came closer, he breathed, “It’s a boy?” His voice was slightly choked.

Smiling, you nodded. He knelt next to you and peered into the blanket, staring down at his son for the first time. Then he turned his head slightly to regard you. “You look beautiful,” he complimented, and you looked up, surprised. You didn’t know exactly what you looked like, but you were sure you were a mess after labour and childbirth. Your hair was a matted, sweaty mess, and you were dressed simply, in a cotton underdress.

Still, from the way he watched you holding the baby, you could have been dressed in the most beautiful of clothes and jewels.

“Do you want to hold him?” you asked, and his eyes lit up.

“Can I?” he asked. You nodded, passing the little bundle over to him.

“My son,” he said softly, leaning his head down to get closer to the baby. “Min Man-bok.” The name had been chosen by the astrologers, who said it would bring him great fortune throughout his life. You hoped it was true. This boy would grow up to be the emperor that united the warring houses of Min and L/n, and finally put an end to all the senseless violence that had stolen the lives of your brothers, and later, your uncle.

As you watched them – your husband and your son – you felt a sense of contentment like you’d never known before. In that moment, it hardly mattered that they were the emperor and the crown prince, that the weight of the kingdom rested upon your baby’s tiny shoulders. For that brief window, they could just be… yours.

---------------------------------

The birth of your son changed everything. The gifts that had once been so dear to you because they meant that someone was out there thinking of you now seemed almost uncomfortable, like unwanted attention that threatened the security of your family. You knew it was ridiculous – after all, the giver of said gifts had been quietly doing so for months, never trying to push his luck or making his identity known to you.

Still, though, as you became closer to your husband, that nagging feeling that you were doing something wrong wouldn’t leave you. Thankfully, the gifts seemed to dry up, and you wondered if your anonymous admirer was really that astute. Whoever he was, you owed him your gratitude. He’d known when to start, and, it seemed, just when to stop.

In actuality, Yoongi had just been too busy to think about sending the gifts. Having a son took up much of the time that he wasn’t already spending governing, which had also increased in the past month or so. There was so much entertaining to do, as the lords and ladies of the land came to express their fealty to the crown prince, and as Yoongi made ever more ambitious diplomatic alliances with other kingdoms now that his reign was secured with the birth of his son.

In whatever spare time he had, he was constantly hanging around you and Man-bok, fawning over his son and enjoying your company. Despite your confinement, you thwarted the rules by sitting right outside your door to get a little sun and fresh air, often holding your son while you did so. It was a beautiful sight, one he wanted to continue to drink in for the rest of his days.

It was no surprise, therefore, that his priority wasn’t sending cute gifts to you anonymously, since he was always around you. When your confinement finally ended, he threw a little two-person party, ordering the kitchen to make all of the food you’d been craving since you were pregnant that had been off-limits for you, including your old favourites. He even managed to get the cook from your country estate into the palace, to make your childhood favourite.

“Thank you for dinner,” you said at the end of it, resisting the urge to lean back on your hands to give your stomach more space.

“Thank you,” he countered. “I am forever in your debt.”

“It was my duty,” you demurred. It was the truth – you’d always known that it would be your job to bring heirs to your husband.

“Still.” There was a beat of silence as a servant rushed to fill your cups with rice wine. He lifted his cup to toast you. “You have brought new hope to this kingdom. An emperor who will unite the houses of Min and L/n.”

“I thought our marriage accomplished that,” you giggled. You might have had too much alcohol tonight, after almost a year of not having any.

“You really think so?” he breathed, looking at you like you’d hung the stars in the sky and told him they were for him.

“Yoongi…” It was the first time you’d called him by name. In your defense, the open, vulnerable way he was looking at you made it difficult to remember that he was a warrior king, despite the scar on his face that attested to his experience fighting a war. “Of course, Your Grace.” You recovered from your slip quickly, and you flushed slightly, hoping he wouldn’t remember it.

Of course, that was a doomed wish. He’d committed it to memory, the sound of your precious voice speaking his name, and in that almost fond and tender tone, too. He felt his heart squeeze in his chest, and knew he was done for.

When he left your quarters that night after dinner, he barely waited till he’d descended the steps to pump his fist in the air. That was the most successful interaction you’d had with him to date, not counting when Man-bok was born, of course, since he was pretty sure you were so exhausted you couldn’t snipe at him if you tried then.

“Your Grace!” Sambo, walking a step behind him, sounded scandalized.

---------------------------------

“So, tonight went well,” Ling prompted as she helped you get ready for bed. You sat in front of her, letting her take the pins out of your hair and sighing in relief. Your updo was often twisted so tightly it pulled on your scalp, and the giant metal pins hurt, to say the least.

“How would you know that?” you murmured, trying to keep a straight face. Ling would never let you live this down if you confessed to her just how much you enjoyed the company of your husband these days. Not after you’d screamed so loudly and for so long about how you hated him and didn’t ever want him to touch you.

In your defense, he’d really been a nightmare to live with at the beginning, cold and angry, mistrustful of your intentions. Not that he’d had any reason to trust you based on the way you’d treated him. You still cringed to think of the angry, cruel words that had been exchanged between you. You’d mocked the scar on his face from your uncle, the previous emperor, and he’d taken pleasure in describing the way he ran his sword through him in exchange. You’d laughed at his tenuous grip on the throne, and he’d—

Well. Suffice it to say, both of you had moved past that.

Ling reached over you to shift the mirror so that you could see your own face in it. “You’ve always had a shitty poker face, milady,” she explained. “You can’t hide anything from me.”

You sighed. “I knew I should have gotten different servants when I came,” you responded without any heat.

“Please, as if you have the patience to teach someone else just how you like your morning routine,” Ling scoffed, recognizing your teasing for what it was. Finally removing the last pin from your hair, she smoothed her hands over it as it tumbled down your back, then picked up the brush to comb through it.

“You’re right. I guess I’m stuck with you,” you responded, tilting the mirror slightly so you could look at Ling in it.

“Whatever. Stop trying to change the subject,” Ling ordered. “What happened tonight? You looked so happy when he left, and he could barely hold back his grin.”

You rolled your eyes. “Not that,” you said defensively. “I’m barely even recovered from giving birth; I’m hardly ready for more.”

“All right,” Ling conceded, though you could tell from her tone that she was still amused. Belatedly, you realised that your defense hadn’t been about how you felt about your husband at all. “Have a good night, milady.”

---------------------------------

Having a son changed everything. You knew, perhaps better than anyone else, save your brothers, the dangers that came with being an heir to the throne, and it worried you to pieces that his life would never be safe.

You’d told your husband before, completely unsympathetically, that this was what being the king would entail. Having people after you, coveting what was yours, always lurking in the shadows and waiting for a time to strike… the idea that your own son would be subject to the travails of being the emperor made you want to clutch him to your breast and never let him go.

Yoongi caught you in one of your moods one afternoon, sitting in the gazebo in your private gardens, leaning against a pillar as you rested your son against your thighs. You cooed at him as you played with his hands and feet, smiling as he laughed back at you, but the furrow of your brow gave you away.

“What are you thinking about?” he asked, sitting down next to you. It was rare for you two to be alone – Ling and Sambo were usually hanging around, and Man-bok’s nanny and wet nurse weren’t too far from the baby either. But you’d wanted a little time to bond with your son alone, so they were hanging out by the pond a small distance away. Ling had become friends with the nanny and nurse, and they were more than happy to have a little free time to gossip.

You picked up your infant son’s hand and used it to wave at him. “Hello, daddy,” you said in a high-pitched baby voice, and Yoongi smiled tenderly at the both of you, although you were still looking down at Man-bok and didn’t see it.

“Hello, my son,” he replied, leaning in to pick Man-bok up. You straightened his clothes a little as Yoongi stood the baby up on his lap, bouncing him a little. Yoongi was truly a remarkably involved father, especially for being the emperor.

“Yoongi, I’m worried about Man-bok,” you confessed in a small voice, looking up at your husband for the first time. Even the scar on his face now was a reminder of how difficult it was to be the emperor – Yoongi had been lucky to escape with just a disfigured face. He hadn’t even lost his vision.

“What’s wrong with him?” Yoongi asked with a frown, turning the boy slightly in his grasp to inspect him. He looked healthy enough, but you never knew with babies, really.

“Nothing,” you rushed to reassure him. “It’s just that being the crown prince is dangerous, and being the emperor is even worse.” Your voice choked up as you explained. Saying the words out loud made them more real somehow, and you almost wished you hadn’t.

“Y/n…” Yoongi looked over at you, shifting Man-bok so that he was being held more securely against him. “Is this about your uncle?” At the beginning, he’d never thought much about the fact that you were related to the previous emperors, but now the fact that he’d basically murdered your uncle in cold blood hung over his head like the sword of Damocles.

“Y/n… I’m sorry.” The words stuck in his craw, but he forced himself to say them anyway. It was a lie, but if it was what you needed to feel better…

Instead of accepting his apology, you made a rude noise. “For what?” you asked.

“For your uncle…?” Confused now, Yoongi cocked his head at you and furrowed his brow.

“Why would you need to apologize? Of course you raised an army to take the throne. It was his fault for leaving potential heirs alive.” The nonchalant way you expressed that sentiment gave him pause. He’d never taken you for someone so cavalier about violence and death. “He did the same thing to my brothers.”

The way your lips tightened as you said it clued him in to the fact that that was what was really bothering you. Of course, your brothers. The two princes that your uncle had had imprisoned and then murdered to secure his rule. When your father had died, your uncle had been declared regent since the crown prince wasn’t old enough to rule, and he’d wasted no time cementing his own authority instead.

“Y/n…” You avoided his gaze, instead reaching for Man-bok. He relinquished the boy to you and you hugged him close, needing to feel your son’s warm, healthy body pressed against you. “I promise you,” he continued, his voice full of conviction. “Nothing will ever happen to our son. Not so long as I live and breathe.” Ducking in, he pressed a tender kiss to the top of Man-bok’s head.

“Really?” The faint hope in your voice made his heart clench. In all the time he’d spent alternately admiring your kindness and cursing your stubborn, know-it-all streak, he’d never seen the vulnerability that you were showing him now. In hindsight, it was silly that he hadn’t realized this earlier, but of course you were scarred from the civil conflict that had been raging. Your family was in the thick of it all, and as much as the men and women involved were royalty, they were also your blood relatives. Really, it was a wonder you’d turned out as normal as you had.

“I swear on my life.” He’d never meant anything as much as he did now.

“Thank you, Yoongi.” Holding Man-bok with one hand, you reached for him with the other, sliding your arm along his shoulder to pull him close for a kiss. It was sweet and tender, a wonderful, perfectly fitting first kiss. His eyes fluttered shut as you drew close, wanting to savour the moment for as long as he could. Your lips were soft and you smelled like roses, just like the perfume he’d given you in secret.

---------------------------------

It was highly unusual for the emperor to share a bed with his empress. Intimacy was carefully planned based on auspicious dates, and after the deed was done, you both got dressed and went your separate ways. You knew that, and yet you slipped into his room that night, after Man-bok’s 100-day celebration.

You’d gotten mostly undressed after the banquet ended, grateful to be out of your restrictive clothing. Man-bok was sleeping, of course, with his nanny, and you’d dismissed Ling too after she helped you out of the empress robes. Dressed in just your pajamas, you pulled a warm shawl over your shoulders and left your quarters. You just had so much pent-up energy from earlier, and you needed to talk to someone about it.

“Hey,” you said softly, slipping in through the doors just as Sambo was leaving. He gave you a sideways glance, but you ignored it.

“Hey,” Yoongi greeted, smiling at you. He too was in his pajamas, already in bed, the covers pooling around his waist as he sat up. “What’s up?”

“Nothing, I just…” You swallowed, feeling a little silly now. This could have waited till tomorrow. “I guess I didn’t want the night to be over,” you confessed. It had been so much fun tonight, getting to meet and talk to everyone. Your sisters and old friends had come to the palace, and Man-bok had been so cute in his little ceremonial robes.

“I get it,” he said. “Come sit.”

You came closer, sliding the shawl off your shoulders, and knelt next to his futon. Illuminated in the soft light of the lamp nearby, the long blonde hair he’d left to tumble over his shoulders seemed to glow softly. Your own hair had been hastily put back in a bun – a lady never left her rooms with her hair down, after all. It was nowhere near as intricate as anything Ling could do for you, but it sufficed.

“Did you have a good time tonight?” he asked with a soft smile.

“You know I did,” you giggled, leaning closer.

“Yes, I saw you having a grand old time with your sisters,” he teased, fondness evident in his voice. Ever since the kiss you’d shared, your relationship had been evolving. Yoongi didn’t know if you would ever forgive him for what he’d done to your family – despite your dismissive attitude towards your uncle – but he was content with this. You letting your guard down around him, seeking him out and enjoying his company… it was more than he’d allowed himself to hope for.

“Oh, I haven’t seen them in over a year,” you enthused. “It was so nice to see them all again! Thank you for inviting them,” you said, more quietly now. “I know it wasn’t an easy decision, inviting the L/n clan tonight.” Despite everything, you knew he was still insecure about his rule.

“You’re welcome.” He smiled at you, then noticed for the first time the soft light glinting off the hairpin you were wearing, the one he’d bought for you. “Oh, you’re wearing the pin! I was right, it does look good on you,” he complimented.

“You— what?” Your voice was shaky, your eyes wide as you reached up to wrap your fingers around the pin, and Yoongi realized that he’d fucked up.

Just to be sure that it was the right one, you pulled it from your hair, causing the long locks to tumble over your shoulders. Brushing it aside impatiently, you inspected the pin. Sure enough, it was the same one that you’d received almost a year ago, and you’d never found out who sent it to you.

“It was you?” The words trembled, fragile in the darkness of the room, barely there, like a wisp of smoke.

“I… yes.” Yoongi was watching you carefully, his hands held out placatingly in front of him.

“But why?” It felt like your mind was shutting down, unable to reconcile this new information. Back when you’d gotten this pin, you could barely stand to be in the same room as your husband. You hadn’t even started being friendly until after Man-bok was born. To know that he hadn’t felt the same way, that he’d been quietly watching you, thinking of you…

“I just wanted to make you smile,” he said honestly with a half shrug.

“Yoongi…” Your voice was choked up, and he was starting to panic now, not quite sure what he’d done wrong. Even if you hadn’t welcomed his advances, he hadn’t overstepped, right? All he’d wanted to do was make you less miserable, and now he was thinking that he would have been better off leaving you alone altogether.

“Is… is that okay?” The words were hesitant, Yoongi ducking slightly to look at your face.

Sniffling, you nodded, swiping at your tears impatiently so you could look at him clearly. In the dim, flickering light, Yoongi’s face was the most beautiful, dear thing you’d ever laid eyes on. Your eyes roamed his face, seeing him as if for the first time. He was so handsome, your husband, your emperor.

“Are you disappointed? Is that why you’re crying?” Worry crinkled Yoongi’s brow. He knew he wasn’t the greatest catch. Throne aside, his hair was a strange colour and the scar running dramatically across his face marred him permanently. He was short and quiet, awkward, caustic… The insecurities came roaring to the forefront.

“No,” you denied, grabbing his hands and bringing them to your chest. You shuffled closer yet, so that your forehead rested against his. “I’m not disappointed at all. Yoongi…” you breathed, your eyes fluttering shut as you brushed your lips across his softly. “Thank you.” For caring about you even when you’d cursed him. For being by your side, even when you hadn’t known it. Just for being him.

Yoongi’s hand slipped from your grasp before reaching up to cup your face, his thumb running across your cheekbone tenderly. “You’re welcome.” He understood what you meant and responded in kind. “You give me more than you know, Y/n.”

The urge to give him more was rising within you. Holding onto his shoulders for balance, you swung one leg over his lap, so that you were straddling him. His hands went to your waist, supporting you and tugging you closer. “Y/n,” he groaned. “What do you want from me?”

Your response was unequivocal. “Everything.”

That was all the permission he needed. Yoongi’s hand travelled up from your waist to the back of your head, bringing you in for a fiery kiss. He poured all of the longing of the past months into it, his lips moving over yours with urgency. Try as you might to keep up, you couldn’t. You’d only had sex with him to conceive before, and it had always been a hasty, dispassionate affair. You didn’t know what to do with your hands or your mouth, your palms resting lightly on his shoulders. You liked this, enjoyed the way his tongue slid against yours, but your body was rigid with uncertainty.

“Y/n, are you okay?” Yoongi broke away from the torrid kiss to ask. His hand on your waist rubbed you soothingly as he leaned back to take a good look at you.

“Uh, yeah, I…” You stammered. “This isn’t like before,” you finally said. All you knew of sex was what he’d shown you before, quick thrusts with his hands holding onto your thighs while you clutched the bedsheets and tried not to let your pain and discomfort show.

It was vague, but Yoongi knew what you meant, and he flushed with shame. “I’m going to make it up to you, okay?” he said, wrapping his arms around you and turning so that you were lowered onto the futon. His forearms bracketed your body, holding his weight up as he lowered his head for another kiss. “I’m gonna make you feel so good,” he slurred against your lips, one hand reaching for the tie of your shirt.

“Yoongi,” you breathed, your hands sliding around his waist as you held on to his clothes, tugging him closer to you. You felt the hard press of his erection against your belly, and were filled with curiosity. Before, you’d never really wanted to get close to it, and he’d basically just shoved it into you with little fanfare. You’d never even gotten a good look before.

Undoing the ties to his trousers, you slid your hand in, running your fingers hesitantly along his cock.

“Fuck,” he breathed, and you jerked your hand back as if scalded.

“I’m sorry,” you started to apologize, and he backtracked immediately.

“No, no, you didn’t do anything wrong,” he reassured you, nosing at your chin before he trailed kisses down your neck. You sighed and tilted your head, giving him more room.

“Really?” you asked.

“Yes, really,” he said, sucking a little mark right over your collarbone. Emboldened now, you tried again, this time wrapping your hand softly around the shaft. His skin was soft here, and so smooth, but you could feel the steely hardness underneath.

“Ah, you’re so good,” he praised, and you started stroking him lightly, carefully.

“Allow me,” he breathed as he slid his hand down your body, groaning as he found the wetness between your legs. “So perfect for me,” he sighed as he started stroking your clit softly, watching you for your reaction.

You moaned luxuriantly, throwing your head back as your hips rocked. You’d never felt anything like this before, and if this was what sex could be, it was no wonder everyone seemed to like it so much. As you grew distracted with the pleasure suffusing your being, your hand slowed down and then stopped on his erection, but he didn’t mind. Coaxing the sighs and moans from you was more than enough for him.

“I’m going to put my finger in now,” he warned you, and your eyes opened in confusion.

“Why?” you wondered.

“I have to stretch you out, love, so you can take me easily,” he answered, leaning down to kiss you.

“You didn’t before,” you pointed out, and he grimaced.

“Please forget everything I did before,” he groaned, sounding very much like he was in pain. “None of it was right, and I want to show you how much I love you.”

“You—what?” That was new. You hadn’t expected it so soon, if ever.

“Oh, fuck.” He reared back at that and clapped his hands over his mouth in horror. “I didn’t mean to say that! Please ignore it,” he pleaded. Honestly, he wouldn’t blame you if you put your clothes back on and ran out of there right now. What an embarrassing lapse of decorum.

To his surprise, you did none of that, instead wrapping your hands around his wrists and tugging them away from his face. “Did you mean it?”

“Y/n—” he whined, his face hot.

“Yoongi, please,” you said, and the tenderness in your voice gave him courage.

“Yes,” he admitted. “But I don’t expect you to say it back! I know it’s too soon, and you might never feel that way about me, and that’s okay, really, I—”

You cut him off by tugging him close to you and kissing him. “I love you too,” you murmured softly when you separated.

“Really?” His voice was small, and you smiled as you nodded.

“Fuck, I’m going to make it all better,” he swore, his voice deepening into a growl towards the end. With a renewed sense of purpose, he pushed you back into the futon. His hands were everywhere as they stripped you of your clothing, and you felt a little exposed lying there bare for him to see. You were more than aware that your body hadn’t quite bounced back from pregnancy, and he’d never seen you completely nude anyway.

The sheer reverence reflected in his gaze did much to boost your confidence, though. “You’re so gorgeous,” he rasped, bending to tug a nipple into his mouth. You cried out, your back arching as he laved at it, his hand returning to its previous mission of getting you ready to take him. His thumb rolled over your clit gently as he slid his fingers into you, first one, then two, pumping slowly to loosen you up. The wet, lewd sound soon echoed through the room.

“Yoongi,” you breathed to get his attention, pushing his shirt over his shoulders. The tie had already come undone and the front was hanging rather uselessly by his sides, and it wasn’t difficult to remove it. Yoongi got the message, though, stripping himself off with far less fanfare than he’d done for you before coming back with a vengeance, as if the seconds he’d spent away from your body were too much to bear.

“Yoongi, c’mon,” you begged inarticulately, pulling his body down to yours by wrapping your arms and legs around him.

“Stop it,” he admonished. “I’m going to get you nice and ready for me. You have to be patient.” But you could see the way his jaw clenched.

“Yoongi, I want you to fuck me,” you whined, writhing on the mattress.

That certainly got his attention, and he looked back up at your face, seeing the expression of wild abandon painted across your features. Your eyes were shut and your mouth open as you lost yourself to the pleasure he was giving you, long hair spread across his pillow.

“You ruin me,” he accused as he withdrew his hand, using the slick coating his fingers to lube up his cock before he positioned it at your entrance. You moaned and arched, tightening your legs around him to draw him in deeper.

Before, when he’d done this, it had hurt. You’d been dry and he hadn’t put any effort into preparing you or making it a pleasurable experience for you, and you tensed up, remembering how unpleasant the experience had been before. You wanted to make him feel good, though, because he’d done the same for you, and it was that which motivated you to urge him into your body.

When he slid in, inch by glorious inch, contrary to your expectations you didn’t feel pain. No, there was a stretch, but it was intensely pleasurable, and you writhed against him. “Ah, Yoongi, it feels so good,” you gasped.

“Yeah?” he said, sucking marks into your neck. “You like that?” When he finally bottomed out, he rested his forehead against yours, panting as he tried to retain some control.

“Yes, Yoongi,” you moaned, wriggling and clenching down on him, desperate for more.

“Fuck, don’t move,” he gasped, his eyes wide as he clutched your hip. “I want to make this good for you.”

“It is good,” you insisted, ignoring his instructions.

“Y/n, you don’t even know,” he groaned, bracing himself as he started to move his hips. He was gentle at first, making sure that it didn’t hurt, but you were impatient, whining that you wanted more, and before he knew it, he was really going at it, one arm hooked around your leg to hold you open for him.

“Yoongi, yes, yes,” you exulted, thrilled. The expression on his face, his brow furrowed tightly, was endlessly exciting for you, and you loved the motion of his jaw as he clenched hard, focusing on pleasing you.

Adjusting his position, he started thrusting again, this time skidding against your g-spot with every thrust. To really seal the deal, he reached down to rub at your clit with his fingers, drinking your every sound and movement up eagerly. You raked your nails down his back as your legs tightened around him, clenching down on him hard as you came.

Faced with the sensation of your walls fluttering around him rhythmically, he couldn’t hold it together much longer, pressing his forehead into your neck as he reached his own orgasm, groaning as his hips stuttered sporadically.

When it was over, he slumped down over you, barely remembering to tilt his body at the last second so that he slid off you and onto the futon. “I love you,” he gasped, throwing one sweaty arm over your chest to drag you closer to him so he could press kisses over your face. “I love you so much.”

Smiling, you turned your head, rubbing your nose against his affectionately. “I love you too, Your Grace.” The teasing lilt in your voice as you called him that warmed his heart. Before he could say much more, however, you yawned and turned, slinging your arm around his waist. “Good night,” you murmured, burying your face in his chest.

“Good night.” He rested his hand on the back of your head. His empress, his wife. His love.

---------------------------------

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[alilbihh]

coming home | kth

pairing: taehyung x reader

summary: taehyung comes home to the two loves of his life.

words: 1.2k

genre: dad!taehyung, fluff, taehyung just loving u and his daughter a whole bunch ok

prompt: don’t touch that!

"Oh no, no, don't touch that!" You say as you gently scoop the two year old in your arms, nudging the fork away from her wildly swinging baby fist. "We don't play with our food, okay?"

For a second it looks like she's going to go on a wild rampage and flip her entire plate around, but then her eyes widen and she says something that sounds suspiciously like apple tater.

You nod, heart impossibly full, and make sure to look very serious when you say, "You're absolutely right, of course."

"Wah."

"That too."

You're feeding her spoonfuls of baby food as she watches a weird cartoon you don't recognize, with a pair of pigs dressed as dogs. It's odd, but Heejin seems very invested, not even noticing when some of her food trickles down her chin.

Then, after she's finished and you've thrown away a numerous amount of napkins, you're bouncing her lightly on your lap with some sort of musical playing in the background when she starts baby babbling nonsense. Something something muffin something something.

"You're right once again," you nod nod nod, "That note was pretty pitchy."

"Such a harsh critic," a voice says somewhere and you perk up, turn, spot Taehyung leaning against the wall with a dopey sort of smile, fond fond fond.

Then he steps inside dressed in fitted slacks and a poofy shirt tucked into tweed pants, looks so pretty you might just burst with it. He steps inside and it feels like something's clicked into place, like the world's slowly exhaling the breath it's been holding the closer he gets.

Your husband reaches out to touch first, Heejin vibrating and wiggling on your lap with a happy little shriek, and you watch as Taehyung grins and laughs and squats to kiss her forehead, her temple, the apple of her cheeks.

"Hello, my loves," he breathes, snorts when his daughter starts patting lightly at his face with her chubby little hands.

"Da." She mumbles, and your heart soars at Taehyung's easy laughter.

"Da-ddy," you say slowly and she repeats it dutifully, "That's right! That's it, you almost got it-- Taehyung, baby, are you really going to cry every time she calls you that?"

"No." Taehyung says, voice suspiciously thick.

You laugh, mutter a fond "Nerd," then pucker your lips invitingly. He grins, impossibly fond, impossibly in love, stands before dipping eagerly to press his lips to yours, all soft and slow, just the way he likes it.

Heejin babbles something, then starts taking fistfuls of Taehyung's patterned shirt. You watch as he takes a hold of her palms and presses little kisses to them, then tickles both her feet. Heejin kicks and flails, positively wriggling with giggles, her tiny body bursting with it.

You run a hand through his hair, grin when he whines, "Stop, m'hair is gross."

It is kinda gross, but you comb through the day's grime anyway, laugh when Taehyung mutters another halfhearted and drawn out "noo," before settling.

"S'why you shouldn't have come home so late," you mutter, poking at his left nostril, then tilt your head to kiss Heejin's cheek and say, "Right? Tell your dad he's being a dummy."

She gets about half of the word right and the rest is just some sounds strung together but you applaud her anyway, and she does this happy little celebratory wiggle.

Then Taehyung copies her exaggeratedly enough to make both you and Heejin laugh and it's moments like these that make you think, think of how glad you are to have kept your heart open, to have let him be so soft and gentle with it, makes you wonder why you ever thought of quieting it down.

(Think about how there are so many things worth loving, worth telling the universe about.)

And maybe you'll tell Taehyung that one day, will sit him down and tell him how endlessly grateful you are, how happy you are to wake up to this every single day. To exactly this, Heejin and Taehyung, the two loves of your life.

But maybe you don't need to, you think. Maybe he knows. Maybe there are endless ways of showing it. Maybe there are days and days ahead where you can do exactly that.

Taehyung is currently listening very attentively to the baby nonsense Heejin is spouting, just words strung together that don't form a cohesive sentence; but her speech pattern, the way she's speaking, it all makes it sound like she's really speaking. Like a tiny business lady. Like a copy and paste of Taehyung's face to hers but with chubbier cheeks.

Taehyung nods, humming accordingly, and you try to hold it in but end up letting out a breathy little laugh that earns you furrowed brows from Taehyung and the baby.

You clear your throat, "Sorry," you say before straightening. "Please, do continue."

Heejin pats your thigh, almost in forgiveness, and Taehyung does this awkward little thing where he lets go of your hand, regrets it, then reaches back for it, doesn't even think twice about it. You kiss his knuckles, hear him breathe out a sleepy sort of sigh.

Heejin, as if awaken from some sort of trance, stops speaking mid not-sentence, then abruptly falls flat on her side like a rock suddenly realizing its own weight and toppling over. Her head lands on your thigh, and you laugh and comb through her hair silently as she fights through sleep.

"We should put her to bed," You mumble without looking away. There's half a moment of stilted silence, and when you look up you catch Taehyung already looking, and he looks so so fond it melts you down to your bones and then deeper.

"M'kay," he breathes, raises a hand to caress the under of your eye, then stands up to carry his daughter to bed as soundlessly as he can.

(It's after that when you're both in bed, the day having passed and the world letting itself breathe, where it's that one time between day and night where it feels like the space of bodily silence between one big exhale and the next breath you take.

It's then, then that he reaches out to touch, reaches out to say how much he loves so so much, like it's hard to get close without saying it, without letting the words spill. Like his heart is too big and heavy for him to carry on his own.

"So beautiful," he sighs against your collarbone, repeats almost nonsensically, and you trail a hand from his neck down the dip in his back, everything gentle and warm, sticky with sleep and afternoon fog.

"Hmm," you say, a hum and a sigh all mixed into one.

"Sometimes," he starts, almost breathless, "Sometimes, I look at you and our daughter and am so overwhelmed, I don't know what to do with all of it."

It's not exactly a confession. It's not. Neither is it everything you've always wanted to say-- I love you I love you I love you, so much; I hope we can learn and age and grow together.

But it's a start. With Taehyung, everything is.

So you say, "Me too," and that's that. That’s also a start. Then when you wake up tomorrow, that will be a start, too.)

#btsghostie #btsghostiebingo #bts #bts taehyung #taehyung x reader #bts fanfiction #dad taehyung #dad bts #bts fluff #bts scenarios #bts imagines #taehyung fluff #taehyung fanfiction #bts x reader

[vantaenims]

bittersweet | yoongi

pairing: idol!yoongi x reader

genre: established relationship au | fluff, bit of angst

word count: 7.6k

warning/s: alcohol consumption.

summary: Being miles away from you, Yoongi’s starting to feel like he’s missing out in your life and he can’t help but be guilty about it hence the reason why he made it his mission to be with you as much as possible now that he’s back home.

Part of BTSGhostieBingo (idol!au prompt)

masterlist

all rights reserved © vantaenims - do not repost, translate, or claim as your own.

—

Yoongi has his hand around the steering wheel, drumming his fingers against it whilst his other arm is placed beside the window, knuckles pressed against his temple as he impatiently stared at your door for about five minutes now. Unlocking his phone, he was about to text you again until a blue bubble popped up saying ‘wait’ as a reply to his first text when he told you he’s outside already, making him wonder what’s taking you so long.

During your call last night, you mentioned to Yoongi that you’re running low on food and that you’ll be going to the grocery store tomorrow, causing him to immediately tell you that he’ll join and accompany you even though he still has a song that he needs to work on which he didn’t told you since you’re probably going to decline his offer to help if you happen to know it.

It’s a song he’s been working on ever since the tour started which is exactly three and a half months ago but he only got to finalize it last night just so he could spend the weekend with you hence the reason why he’s running low on sleep for today but it’s not like that mattered to him right now.

Given the circumstances of his idol life, the majority of the time spent in your relationship is being far away from each other that’s why he tries to make up for the lost time by being with you almost every day ever since he got back last week.

Truth be told, Yoongi never really believed Long Distance Relationships could work and as a matter of fact, he thought that this relationship would just be some sort of a fling to him, bearing in mind that it’s hard for him to enter in a fully committed relationship given his hectic life but luckily, his opinion about it changed when you two somehow managed to make it work - for about two years already and more years to come.

His thoughts were then cut off as soon as he heard a knock coming off from the window of the passenger seat, unlocking the doors once he saw that it was only you whom he'd been waiting all this time.

“Finally, what were you doing for the past ten minutes?” 

“Hello” you greeted in such a cheery voice as you always do whilst you leaned towards Yoongi to give him a kiss on the cheek.

“Did you just got out of the shower?” Yoongi chuckled as soon as he saw how the upper half of your hair is dry while the other half is still damp.

“Sorry, i just woke up when i read your text that you’re on your way” you said as you buckled yourself in your seat.

“I got out of my house at 2 p.m.” Yoongi said, looking at the time that’s displayed on his touch screen stereo, “What time did you sleep?”

“I think it was about 1:30 or 2 in the morning” 

“You’ve slept for twelve hours!?” Yoongi bewilderingly looked at you, slightly jealous at how you’ve managed to get a full sleep while he’s only running on four hours of sleep even though he willfully did that on purpose.

Of course, he wouldn’t tell you the lengths he had to go just so he could free his time for today  because knowing you, you’d probably scold him and tell him to just rest which he thinks is surprisingly the last thing he wants to do, not when time’s limited for him as he needs to leave in a few days to continue the tour.

“It’s just one of those lazy days” you said whilst yawning as you stretched your arms to fully awaken yourself.

“You haven’t eaten anything yet then?” 

“Not yet but I’m fine, I don’t really feel that hungry” you smiled, grabbing Yoongi’s free hand to intertwined them with yours when he gave you a discontented look that didn’t last for long as he return back the smile, raising your intertwined hands to kiss the back of your hand before he freed his hand to switch the gear.

Yoongi proceeded to drive towards the direction of the grocery store where the grocery is but he thought that a little detour won’t hurt, not when that detour is towards the Mcdonald’s Drive Thru.

“I’ll have the six pieces McNuggets meal and can you make the drink and fries into large, thanks.”

As soon as Yoongi got the paper bag, he then placed it on your lap as he continued to drive to exit the drive thru and onto your real destination, not even sparing you a look, making you laugh at how he’s still trying to appear so nonchalant after all these years when he does caring things like this but it’s fun to tease him when he’s acting to be one.

“Aww Yoongs, Thank you” you pinched his cheek which only caused him to scoff as he tried to remove your hand away from his face even though you could clearly see he’s trying to hide his smile as he rolled his eyes.

--

It has been a year since your relationship with Yoongi was announced to the public but you still have to be very cautious whenever you two go out in public as to not raise any unwanted attention and you were both given a set of rules that you need to abide with but there’s this one rule you always seem hard to follow - lessen any displays of affection in public as much as possible.

You put on your mask and put the hood of your jacket up once Yoongi turned off the engine as he followed you in disguising himself, wearing his black bucket hat and mask. As you got out of the car, your hand instinctively went to reach towards Yoongi’s until you realized the situation you both are in, causing you to keep your hands inside the pockets of your jacket as you walked distantly beside him. 

It was weird for you to act so secretive when you two started to date and it was way too hard when you both have to keep your meetings a secret when your relationship got official like that time when you were told that you can only eat out in public at this designated place which is an exclusive restaurant that’s owned by one of Yoongi’s trusted friends for the sake of protecting both of your privacy.

Eventually, talks about your relationship with Yoongi gradually died down after it was publicly announced as time passed by though it can’t be helped that it’ll be sometimes brought up in one of their interviews even though it’s totally unnecessary in the first place but you guessed that you just have to live and deal with it.

“What do you want for dinner?” Yoongi asked as he got one of the carts from the aisle, volunteering to push it around while you scan for food.

“Are you going to cook dinner?” you looked back at him with wide eyes, a surge of excitement crashing at the news.

Yoongi knows how big of a fan you are of his cooking and he’s certain about it because you basically bombard him with messages whenever you get a sudden craving for it or how you’ll express your disappointment whenever you buy something he would cook only for it to be compared, saying how it’ll never taste as good as his which he’s taken pride of.

“Does steak and mashed potatoes sound good?” Yoongi asked as he put the frozen sirloin into the empty cart only to see that it wasn't empty anymore as he spotted the bottle of red wine.

“I knew you’d say my favorite, that’s why i got the wine”

“You never liked the taste of wine”, Yoongi stated, remembering that time he brought a wine with him when he visited your house only for it to be only consumed by him as you can never stand anything that tastes bitter which is one of the things he first learned about you.

But there was that one instance when you got him amused when you decided that you’ll be drinking with him although it’s totally way out from what he expected. The memory is still as clear as day when he remembered you walking out of his kitchen with a wine glass on hand  that you placed on the centerpiece table of his living room.

“Are you going to have a wine?” Yoongi asked with his brows raised, settling his glass filled with wine on top of the table.

“I thought it’s not fair for you to drink alone so might as well join you” you adjusted yourself as you sat down on the carpeted floor beside Yoongi.

“You really don’t have to drink -” Yoongi didn’t get to finish his sentence when you whipped out a grape juice box behind your back, watching as you poked the covered hole with it’s straw to squeeze out the contents into the glass.

“Cheers?” you said as you swirled the liquid in the glass, making it look as if it’s the same wine he’s drinking and Yoongi can’t help but laugh at your quirky attempt. 

“A grape juice?”

“Hey, wine is also a grape juice except it’s fermented and i can never like anything that tastes bitter so what do you expect?” you reasoned out but nonetheless find the whole thing funny too.

Yoongi can only watch in delight as you get more defensive about the topic of grape juice vs wine, convincing him that both of the beverages are sourced from the same fruit, the only difference is that the other one tastes bitter whilst the other one tastes sweet.

“It’s okay baby, it’s the thought that counts” 

You stopped yourself from talking as soon as you heard the term of endearment come out of Yoongi’s mouth. It was always you who would call him ‘baby’ until now and you can’t help but blush as you try to conceal your growing smile when you remember what Jungkook told you.

“You are indeed cute when you’re drunk” you looped your arm around his as you rested your chin on his shoulder to kiss his cheek, making his smile bigger.

Yoongi clinked his glass with yours before he downed the remaining wine in one go as he try to quickly cover up the embarrassment he felt although there’s no use in hiding it anymore once he felt how warm his face feels like, not knowing if it’s the effect of the alcohol or if it’s your effect - obviously, it’s you.

--

“Can we grab a coffee first before we leave?” Yoongi asked once he felt his energy slowly depleting, the cup of coffee he had in the morning clearly out of his system now that he’s feeling a bit grumpy which is more of a reason that he needs to refuel with caffeine.

“Sure” you said as you closed the trunk of the car after you helped him load the groceries, following Yoongi to the cafe that’s right beside the grocery store.

Thankfully, there aren’t many people dining inside the cafe that’s why you’ve gotten to the counter right away as Yoongi did the work of telling your orders to the attendant whilst you scanned the cakes that are displayed as you munch on a pack of Skittles you got back in the store.

“Do you want anything else?” Yoongi asked just before he could finalize the orders.

“I’m fine, there’s no red velvet cake” you said as you managed to stand beside Yoongi, a piece of Skittles in between your fingers ready to go straight to Yoongi’s mouth until you stopped when you felt the cashier attendant’s gaze on you as if she’s trying to recall why you looked so familiar.

You’ve clearly forgotten that you’re still out in public and that your face is perfectly visible as you’ve lowered your mask to eat but it’s too late to hide your identity as you saw how her eyes widened once she recognized who you are. She definitely got starstruck once she glanced beside you where Yoongi’s standing though she remained professional and offered a smile towards the both of you which you both gladly returned with a bow of your head.

“Your orders will be ready in a while”, she said as she handed the receipt to Yoongi who let out a little chuckle as you both made your way towards the claiming area, still finding it hilarious how you quickly retrieved your hand to eat the candy instead when the attendant recognized you.

“I think i should eat this later” you muttered as you placed the mask back again on your face, sealing the pack of candy for later. 

Looking over your side, you bumped your hips against Yoongi’s when you saw his shoulders still visibly shake from laughter and how his eyes turned into little crescents from smiling. 

Yoongi went over the counter as soon as your orders were called, getting his Iced Americano while he handed to you your Caramel Macchiato, muttering a thank you to the staff as you made your way out of the shop and back to the parking lot.

“Ah finally, i could eat in peace” you said as you got inside the car, discarding your mask and taking your hood down. You reopened the pack of Skittles, pouring them over your palm as you straight out put it on your mouth and also pouring more for Yoongi but he offered his palm instead when you reached your hand out to feed it to him.

“Say ah” you said as you picked one piece of candy instead, zooming in your finger like an airplane into his mouth.

“What am i? A child?” Yoongi playfully grimaced but obeyed nonetheless as you popped them into his mouth.

“Yes you are” you chuckled, resting back in your seat as you raised your leg to tuck it under the other leg, “Why don’t we play a game and you try to guess the flavor of the skittle i’ll feed you?”

You strictly instructed Yoongi that he could not cheat and inspect the color of the candy, telling him he could only look straight ahead at the road, causing him to laugh, saying how he’s going to look straight either way as he needs to keep his attention on driving you both home safely.

“Raspberry”, Yoongi said in full certainty.

“How can you tell Raspberry apart from Wild Cherry?” you squint your eyes at him, skeptical if he cheated or he’s just really good at guessing it because you’re positive that those two flavors taste exactly the same - for you, atleast.

“Maybe my sense of taste is better than yours”

“Yeah you’ve got all the flavors right” you’re impressed to say the least as you try to feed Yoongi another piece of Wild Cherry to test him again until he gently grabbed your hand to stop you as he felt his throat itch from eating too much sweets.

“Doesn’t your throat itch from eating too much sweets?” Yoongi looked over at you, watching as you devoured the candy you were going to feed him instead and as if that isn’t sweet enough, you grabbed your caramel based beverage to sip on it which just made Yoongi cringe in distaste.

“I just really like anything that’s sweet”

“You’re going to get Diabetes at an early age” Yoongi warned as he always has but he knows that his warning will just be disregarded as you continue to satisfy your sweet cravings as you always do.

“That’s why i’m eating as much sweets as i can before i’ll not be able to”

“What kind of logic is that?” 

“You like anything that’s bitter as much as I like sweets so shut up” you shrugged as you pointed out but you totally get that he’s just looking out for you and you appreciate that.

“I atleast won’t get any chronic disease from it”, Yoongi retorted, chuckling at how silly this banter is to begin with and that reminded how adverse you two are and he’s not just talking about your taste preferences but personality wise too.

You and Yoongi are too different from each other - you’re more of an outgoing and friendly person while he is more reserved and quiet one. All his life, Yoongi thought he’d prefer someone who’s similar to him yet here he is, eating up his own thoughts as he eventually got you and he’s not saying that as a bad thing because he wouldn’t have it any other way.

Your relationship is a living testimony that opposites do attract and it’s not as bad as what everyone makes it out to be though there were still a lot of differences and barriers you both have to overcome in the beginning of the relationship which he thinks is inevitable for every relationship to work.

The reason why you two get along so well is because you complement and balance each other, like how you both are able to strengthen each other’s weaker aspects. You’re always able to get him out of his comfort zone and he could always let you be vulnerable to him, let you out of that happy facade you’re always trying to keep up.

In conclusion, you bring out the best in him and he could hope you felt that way about him too, making you two a perfect pair, not even minding a bit how cheesy that thought is to him because it’s only a matter of fact.

--

“Why are you still here?” Yoongi sets aside the sirloin he’s been seasoning, getting distracted how you’re standing so close to him as you peer over his shoulders at what he’s doing much like a curious kid.

“What should i do next?” you asked him for the second time even though Yoongi told you that he’ll just call you whenever dinner’s ready but you’re so persistent in helping him out, causing him to gave in as he told you that you can set up the table which he think is done now that you’re pestering him again.

“Lounge in the sofa, i guess” 

“But i want to help you, Yoongs” you whined, making him chuckle, “Should i peel these potatoes?”

“I’ll do it” Yoongi grabbed the potato from you as well as the bowl that’s filled with it, keeping it close to his side so that you won’t be able to touch it and help him like what you’re suggesting, keeping in mind that he’s doing all of this to make up for the times he’s away.

Guilt would always creep up on him whenever he’s far away from you because you don’t deserve to be neglected like this, dating someone who’s mostly physically absent that’s why he’s doing the most of his ability as much as he can whenever comes back home so that he could actually fulfill the duties and responsibilities of being your boyfriend.

“Let me atleast wash the dishes later then?” you frowned with a pout, causing Yoongi to shake his head at you as he sheepishly smiled.

“Fine if that’ll get you to stop” Yoongi kissed your forehead before he diverted back his attention towards the potatoes but before he could even do so, you grabbed both sides of his face as you inched towards him until he felt your warm lips on his.

Yoongi closed his eyes as he kissed you back, hands almost going towards your waist to reel you in once you kissed him fervently until he remembered how his hands are still dirty and covered with sauce and seasonings for the steak but that didn’t stop him from wanting to deepen the kiss as he slowly tilted his head to the side only for you to break the kiss.

“Right, you don’t need my help” you teased as you peck him once more and also patted his bum right before you left to disappear towards the living room.

Yoongi scoffed that you got him stunned for a moment but nonetheless busied himself as he went back in preparing the dinner that didn’t take too much time to finally get it ready now that you’re not there to bother him anymore.

Withdrawing a plate from your cabinet, Yoongi then began to place the mashed potato first whilst he set the steak beside it, dripping some sauce around it as he tried to recreate those  plating presentations that’s normally seen in high end restaurants.

Yoongi grinned as soon as he entered the dining area, catching the sight of how you set the table into some sort of a candlelit dinner that’s accompanied with pieces of nearly wilted rose petals which he suspected came from the bouquet he bought for you last week but it now surrounds the four sides of the table.

“Y/N! Dinner’s ready” Yoongi called out as he placed the plates on the table. It didn’t take less than five seconds before you emerged in the dining room with a delighted look adorning your face.

“Oh wow it smells really good” you enclosed Yoongi in a back hug as you tipped your toes to kiss him on the cheek, “Thank you, baby.”

Yoongi hummed as he pulled your chair back, guiding you to sit before he made his way to his place as the gentleman he is. Picking up the bottle of wine, uncorking it as he poured it over his glass and onto yours right after but he let the mouth of the bottle hover on the rim of your glass before letting it pour as he looked at you.

“You sure you’d like some wine?” 

“It’s fine”

“If you say so” Yoongi smirked, filling your glass up even though he knows full well that you’re only going to take a sip or two before giving it all up. Clinking both of your glasses, Yoongi watches you whilst he takes a sip of his wine only for him to chuckle after he has seen you scrunching your nose from the bitter taste. 

“It tastes better with this” Yoongi said as he cut up a portion of his steak to feed you with it. The dissatisfied look on your face now gone as the bitterness mixed with the savory taste only made the flavor stronger.

“Your brother told me he taught you how to cook one”

“Yeah, how’d you know that?” Yoongi tried to rack his brain, recalling if he had ever informed you that his brother is the one who taught him to master the art of cooking but he can’t remember telling you that, knowing how he likes to take credit in his cooking skills.

“Your mom invited me over to their house on my birthday and your brother took in charge of cooking the food. I’ve sent you pictures, remember?”

You took out your phone to went over your photo gallery, scrolling over the pictures until it landed over the series of photos you took on the day of your birthday, showing Yoongi a picture of you and Holly nicely cuddled up in the sofa, earning a warm smile from him and on the corner of the picture he spotted the bouquet of tulips he assumes is the one he arranged in advance right by the local flower shop near you, instructing them to deliver it on your doorstep with some note he had written himself.

Lastly, you showed him the selfie you’ve taken on the dining table that’s filled with a sumptuous meal along with his whole family gathering around - his mom, dad, older brother and Holly whom his brother carried in his arms to fit in the picture. 

“I’m glad you had fun” Yoongi gave you a faint smile as he felt his guilt creeping up on him once again.

It has been two months since he had dearly missed your birthday because of the tour and he felt bad for missing out on a special day like this but that’s how it’s always going to be and he hates how this is conceived to be normal in your relationship when it’s unfair, specially for you.

You must’ve noticed his mood faltering a bit as you’ve put your phone down the table, placing your hand on top of him to squeeze it, making him stop focusing on slicing over his steak as he directed his eyes at you to give you a warm smile that indicates not to worry about him.

“I think the tour must’ve been a whole lot of fun, no? How was it this time?” you said, sipping on your wine that had you still scrunching your nose though albeit less noticeable now as you get more accustomed to the taste.

“It’s still great but more than ever now that we get to see more of our fans” Yoongi beamed a smile, taking pride how their hard work and the support from their fans has taken them to where they are now like how they were able to do stadium tours around the world or how they’re able to play concerts in places they’ve never imagine which is something beyond their goal and expectations.

“I’m proud of all of you and will always be, how about we toast on that?” you raise your glass as you take a big gulp of the alcohol out of courage which is a totally bad idea as it had made you immediately regret it, coughing up the bitterness away, causing you to give up the drink all in all.

“Just grab your grape juice from the fridge” Yoongi suggested, chuckling when you stood up to go over the kitchen to do as told and guessed right that you’ll never be able to withstand the alcohol.

The dinner went on with Yoongi urging you to talk more about what you’ve been doing lately but you protested that it has been practically boring and uneventful like his which he interjected that it goes the same for him as well. Apart from performing, he spent most of his time holed up in his hotel room to produce and compose songs or sleep like you’ve never known this or how he’ll just go out to buy some music equipment he needs for his studio.

He’s pretty sure you’ve told him over the phone the story of how you’ve managed to step on a puddle that reached up to your shins on your way home from work, remembering how you’ve complained that it ruined your favorite pair of suede flats.

“Have i told you about this before?” you said, noticing how he continues to smile unfazed like he’s already familiar with this story.

“Yeah but go on” Yoongi assured you that he doesn’t mind at all if he’s heard it before. Nothing compares to all those facetimes and phone calls because this is what he truly missed - getting to talk to you in person with no distance and time difference in between you two.

Soon as you know it, the table looks almost empty now that all the food are completely gone except for Yoongi’s wine glass that’s still filled with the alcohol as he still continuously drink from it while you opted to go for dessert and eat the cookies ‘n cream ice cream flavored you’ve got in the grocery.

The conversation’s still pretty going at this point with you doing most of the talking as you relaxly laid back against the chair with your crossed legs and Yoongi would just stare at you as he rested his elbow against the table with his cheeks pressed against his palm, casually laughing or putting in a few words.

“Tired?” you asked once you noticed his half lidded eyes and how he’s blinking them ever so slowly.

“No, i’m just a bit buzzed i guess” Yoongi denied as he tried to fight off the exhaustion but you did not buy his excuse as you abandoned your pint of ice cream by placing it on the table to stand up and get the plates to put them towards the sink.

Yoongi tailed behind you as he got the pint of ice cream to put them back in the freezer and the wine glasses which you got off of his hand as soon as he was next to you.

“I got this, why don’t you go up and pick something to watch”

“I’m not tired” you laughed now that Yoongi’s cute side is starting to come out as he placed his head on your shoulders with his arms around yours whilst you opened the faucet to run down water over the kitchenwares.

“Just go and let me do this” you turned around to push him away from you with all your might though it’s useless as he stubbornly stood his ground but nonetheless let you guide him when you grabbed his hand and led him towards the end of the stairs.

Standing on the first step, Yoongi leaned down to leave a kiss on top of your head that had you giggling whilst he told you to hurry up before he ascended to leave you to do your task. You ran back to the kitchen as you cleaned up the place as quickly as possible but still making sure not to miss a spot.

You wiped your wet hands with a towel now that you’re done with the dishes which leaves you to your routine of checking every corner of the first floor - unplugging the appliances, getting your water container in the fridge, and securely double checking the locks.

As you went up and open the door to your room, you were immediately greeted with a dimly lit light setting thanks to the television and on the edge of your bed, you see Yoongi clad in a loose white shirt and gray shorts that has been kept in your closet for times he chooses to stay over in your place as he drys his hair with the towel on his hands, signifying that he had just gotten out fresh from the shower.

“What are we going to watch?” you asked as you stood in front of Yoongi to grab the towel from his hand so that you could do the work of drying his hair instead.

“What do you want? I haven’t seen anything that’s interesting yet” Yoongi grabbed your waist to set you aside so he could have a good view of the television as he clicked on the remote to scan the films but still remained his hand on your waist even though you’re not obstructing the view anymore.

“Well, you decide. I’ll join you in a second” you detach yourself from Yoongi’s hold as you go over to your closet to grab some comfortable clothes to change into. You let the damp towel dry as you hang it on your chair before you could enter your bathroom to take a quick shower.

With his hair damp and unruly, Yoongi got up to go over your vanity table where your hair comb is as he drag it along his hair until he noticed the corkboard hanging on your wall just beside the table which he has never seen before, guessing you might’ve put it up while he was away.

It was filled with polaroid pictures of the both of you but mostly of Yoongi and he looked unaware in mostly all of it as you like to candidly take pictures of him but there are also random things attached to it like movie tickets, flower petals, and other things you deemed sentimental but what catches his attention the most is the tissue with some scribbled words on it.

It was a tissue from Baskin Robbins and it has a badly drawn stick figure on it with a text bubble on the side - ‘It’ll be okay’ is what’s written on it. The smudged black ink giving away that it has been sometime ago - two years ago to be precise.

If he remembers it right, he had drawn this when he picked you up from work that time and you remained silent for the whole ride, reasoning that it’s just one of those bad days at work. 

It was also a time when you still find it hard to be vulnerable around him given how the both of you just started dating and that just gave him an idea to go to an ice cream store first on the way to your house, knowing how sweets could always lift your spirits up.

You both got settled inside the car once you got your ice cream and finally be on your way to your house which is something you’ve been dying to do ever since you got from work. Yoongi’s clearly concerned for you but you’re glad he’s not pushing you to say anything but at the same time you felt bad for being silent for the whole time, not wanting to pass the burden you’re feeling.

“Here, have some tissue with you” Yoongi handed it over to you as he got the car out of the parking area until he felt your hand on top of his.

“Thank you, Yoongi” you said with glassy eyes and he’s glad that it’s what took for you to confide in him and for you to start trusting him enough that you managed to show the weak side you’re trying to conceal from him at the start.

Yoongi removed his hand from the tissue at the sound of the bathroom door opening as you came out with a towel wrapped around your hands, dressed in one of those short sleeved top and bottom silk pajama sets he got for you back when he was in Japan.

“I didn’t know you kept this”, Yoongi said with a smile tugging on his face.

You discarded your clothes towards the hamper as you came closer to Yoongi to see that he’s pertaining about the board you’ve recently hung, making you flushed at how he’s not supposed to even see how you keep every piece of something that just reminds you of your time with Yoongi but it’s just the way you are with how those pieces serves as a token of your memory.

“Yeah, I know it’s weird” you said as you look over the board and spot the receipt from the restaurant you both have your first date, embarrassed even more as you sit on the chair to remove the towel from your head as you focus instead on keeping it dry.

“It’s not weird, baby”

Yoongi enjoys making you fluster as much as you like doing it to him too that’s why he’s taken this as an opportunity to tease you more. He took the towel from your hand as he gently blotted and squeezed it against your hair much like what you did to him awhile ago, setting aside the hair you purposely let down to cover your face to the side and place it behind your ear.

“Ow be gentle, let me do it” you complained when Yoongi yanked your hair a bit as he combed through the tangles.

“Sorry, let me just take care of you” Yoongi swatted your hand away but his sweet words got you giggling and also a blushing mess.

As soon as your hair got fully combed, you stood up as Yoongi grabbed your wrist to drag you with him on the bed. He first got himself settled as he sat down with his back pressed against your headboard whilst he pulled you in to let you sit in between his legs, encircling his arms around you as you laid the back of your head on his chest.

“I really can’t find anything fun to watch, why don’t you choose?”

Getting the remote on the nightstand, you scan through the wide variety of movies as you read the plot and watch each trailer but nothing piqued your interest much as what Yoongi told you, sighing in discontentment as you turn off the television.

“Do you want to listen to some music instead?” you suggested, looking up to see Yoongi nod in agreement. You turned on the bluetooth speaker as you paired it with your phone, searching for some songs to play until you just thought of an idea that had you stifling your laughter.

“Ah why play this one?” 

Yoongi’s proud of his recently released mixtape but you had him cringing upon hearing Daechwita play which is the least thing he’s expecting for you to choose. His mixtape just doesn’t fit the mood right now, he’s thinking you’ll be playing those mellow songs you could easily sleep and cuddle into which is something he feels like doing tonight.

“Why? It’s your song” you chuckled even though you can’t clearly see Yoongi’s reaction right now but you just know he’s scrunching his face, “Fine, i’ll change it.”

You chose another mixtape to play and that is Honne’s No Song Without You. Pressing shuffle, the track By My Side instantly played that got you smiling as you remember how you thought of Yoongi when you first heard this song. Actually, all love songs remind you of Yoongi if that isn’t cheesy enough.

Humming along to the song, you grabbed Yoongi’s hand to face his palm towards you as you set your palm against his just to compare how small your hand is compared to him. You decided to trace along the lines with your fingers as you write down the letters of the word that perfectly describes what Yoongi is to you - Home.

“Are you going to do some palm reading and tell me about my future?”

“Hmm your future’s still pretty bleak but there’s one thing that’s clear”

“And what is it?”

“I’m in it” you said that had you giggling which also caused Yoongi to do the same.

“Of course you are”, Yoongi hugged you tighter, swaying the both of you side to side as he kissed your cheek.

You twisted your body to the side so that you’ll be able to put your arms around his neck, the side of your face still remaining on his chest whilst you closed your eyes as you get even more comfortable in this position until you’ve thought of a better idea to make it more comfortable or rather relaxing for Yoongi.

“Lay down on your stomach” you commanded, sitting up straight that made Yoongi’s hold loosen around you.

“Why?”

“Let me take care of you” you repeated the words he told you, sitting yourself on the other side of the bed as you watched Yoongi plopped the side of his head on the pillow where he also kept his arms under. You then straddled his waist after he got himself settled, pressing both of your palms on his shoulder blades, massaging it gently to untie the knots.

Ever since Yoongi got back from tour, he did as much to be with you and to literally take care of you which didn’t go unnoticed - he helped you in assembling your bookshelf that you never bothered to open or how he even changed one of the bulbs from your chandelier that you didn’t notice had burnt out already. 

“Your muscles are a bit tense” you said as you dug the heel of your palm to apply more pressure to his shoulder that had Yoongi humming in pleasure, “Have you even rested properly ever since you got back?”

“I’m okay” you sighed, grabbing his shoulders as you instructed him to turn around so that he could face you but you remained to be straddling him still.

“Yoongi, you’re almost with me everyday and i know that you’re still working on some songs”

The least thing he wants right now is to make you worry about him because he’s the one that should be worrying about you when you’re always the one that’s being left behind here and no, he’s not actually worried but scared that it might literally happen with the two of you growing apart that one day you’ll wake up and suddenly feel the whole long distance thing to be overwhelming and unbearable.

“I just feel guilty for leaving you here and i also want to make the most out of the days i have left with you” Yoongi finally confessed as he sat himself up to be closer to you, hands on your waist as he drew circles on your exposed skin where your shirt rose up before his other hand made way to the side of your face to reel you in for a kiss.

Yoongi bit your lower lip, causing you to slightly open your mouth which he took as a sign for him to slid in his tongue to clash it with yours, making sure to kiss you gently and passionately as he could as he pour his raw feelings into it, wanting to savour the moment slowly rather than taking it in a rush.

The kiss was nothing but pure longing for each other - longing for all the times you’ve missed and for the time he’ll leave again which will be in three days to continue the Asian leg tour. It isn’t also a bad thing because when he comes to think of it, it’s the last part of the tour but that still isn’t an excuse to make Yoongi feel guilty again as he’ll be gone in a span of three months.

It was clear that your kiss is getting more eager as you play with the hair on the nape of his neck, pulling him in close as much as possible when you wrapped your legs around his waist whilst your other hand has made its way under his shirt, resting it above his chest where you can feel his heart that’s beating erratically.

You’re making it hard for Yoongi to take this slow reason why he detached his lips from yours, chuckling when he heard you emit a disappointed grunt but not for long when his warm lips then invaded the base of your neck, leaving a trail of wet kisses as he work his way up to your jaw, pecking the side near your ear as he whispered.

“I’ve missed you”

He was about to kiss your cheek until you pulled him in by his shoulders, snuggling your face into the crook of his neck that had him quite puzzled at the sudden action but nonetheless let you do so as the both of you stayed like that for a while - you sitting on his lap with your legs around his waist and your arms securely around his neck, head still hiding from him while he rubbed your back and gently caressed your hair.

The warmth of your bodies and gentle touches against each other are exchanged between the two of you, not minding how you’re just basking in the silence as you solely focus on enjoying each other’s presence with the music making everything seem so melodramatic and it was just one of those moments you’d call to be bittersweet.

The silence between you two was soon gone as he heard you sniffling, alarming him even more when he felt hot tears falling onto his neck. Yoongi tried to pry you away as he leaned back to get a proper look at you but that just made you tighten your arms around him, burying your face even more into his neck.

“What’s wrong?”

You shook your head, chuckling a bit to mask the reason why you’ve suddenly gotten so  upset, “It’s nothing.”

“Are you sure about that?” Yoongi asked as he laid back down the mattress, joining you with him.

“I'm sorry, it’s just that i still can’t get quite used to it” your voice was muffled but he perfectly heard you and catched on that you’re referring to him leaving so soon again. Finally, he was able to see your face as you adjusted yourself, wiping the tears as you pressed one of your hands on his chest where you rested the side of your face onto.

“You don’t have to be sorry about it” Yoongi comforted you as he gently ran his thumbs along your cheek, “I should be the one saying sorry to you.”

“Yoongs, you don’t have to be sorry about it too” you leaned in towards his touch as you rested your hand on top of his that’s cradling your face, earning Yoongi a smile. 

“I know our relationship is far from normal and it’s sometimes hard for the both of us but I just want to assure you that the distance wouldn’t keep us apart. I won’t leave you because you’re my home and my safe space, Yoongi.”

It’s a rare sight to see Yoongi get emotional but here he is tearing up at your words and how you instantly eliminate the doubts and guilt he has been carrying with himself. Yoongi chuckled as he covered his eyes with his arm, making you laugh too with tears welling up your eyes at the sight of Yoongi crying as the emotionally sensitive person you are.

Turning to the side, Yoongi set you to lay beside him as you both completely faced each other, fondly staring at you whilst he thread his fingers in your hair that had you closing your eyes. Your left hand in between you two caught his attention, fingers immediately landing on your palm as he wrote down the word you’ve written on his.

Yoongi looked up at you as soon as you enclosed your hand around his, watching how your eyes are still close but a small smile is now adorning your face. He scooted closer until  your foreheads touched, closing his eyes as well but before he could drift off to sleep, he dearly whispered the words to express the same sentiment.

“You’re my home and I'll always come back for you.”

--

A/N: The tissue with scribbled words was based on irl and it just gets me soft everytime, reason why i had to write it down hehe. Anyways, hope you like this one and if you like, you could give me feedback about it hehe.

#yoongi imagine #yoongi fluff #suga imagine #btsghostie #bangtanscenery #btsghostiebingo #suga fluff #bts imagine #bts fluff #yoongi x reader #suga x reader #bts x reader #yoongi one shot #suga one shot #bts one shot #yoongi scenarios #suga scenarios #bts scenarios #yoongi idol au #suga idol au #bts idol au #yoongi fanfic #bts fanfic #min yoongi #yoongi #min suga #suga #jeon jungkook #jungkook

[bangtiddies]

Who Stole the Cookies from the Cookie Jar?

Pairing: Platonic: kids!maknae line, featuring dad!Seokjin Genre: Fluff, a bit of crack Rating: PG Words: 1.4k Warnings: crying, poor Jimin gets hurt but it was for the cookies

Summary: Seokjin has at least ten cookies in the jar. That’s a lot of cookies. All ten fingers worth.

Note: unedited because I’m a fool. 

Written for BGW Bingo Bash with the prompt: stealing food

“So, this is what we’re going to do,” Jungkook says, with the highest amount of seriousness a five year old could hold in a gaze. “Taetae will hit Jimin--”

“Will it hurt?” Jimin asks for the umpteenth time that day.

“Don’t worry, Jiminie, I’ll give you my cookies if it hurts too much,” Taehyung says, hugging Jimin and patting his back.

Jungkook nods. “We’re doing this for the cookies, Jiminie. Jin only gives us one. It’s not enough.”

The other two boys agree, little heads nodding while Jungkook huffs with a dramatic flare. Seokjin’s cookies are to risk everything for, even if one of them might get a little hurt. But it’s okay. Seokjin has at least ten cookies in the jar. That’s a lot of cookies. All ten fingers worth.

Jimin reassured, they finally set their plan into action. Taehyung and Jimin make their way to the living area, while Jungkook hides at the top of the stairs. The bottom of the stairs are right next to the kitchen, so Jungkook can stealthily grab the cookies while Seokjin is distracted. The plan will work perfectly.

Once they reach the living room, Jimin takes a peek into the living room, making sure that Seokjin is close by. There, sitting on the couch, is Seokjin, a phone by his ear seeming like he’s deep in conversation. Jimin wonders if they could manage to steal the cookies without having to get hurt.

But, just as he turns to Taehyung to suggest a new plan, he hears a soft, “sorry Jiminie,” before a sting of pain hits his arm, just below his shoulder. Jimin’s bottom lip quivers and he tries to blink the tears away. He wants to tell Taehyung his new plan. But the tears start flowing and Taehyung had hit Jimin with such force that it hurt. He starts sobbing, and Taehyung freaks out a little. He shocked himself with the hit, not expecting it to be so harsh. There’s a pink mark on Jimin’s arm. Taehyung feels an immense amount of guilt.

“Taetae,” Jimin cries. “It’s so sore.”

Taehyung doesn’t know what to do, and before he knows it, he starts crying too. “Jiminie… I’m so sorry.”

It doesn’t take long for Seokjin to hear the crying. He sighs, letting Yoongi know that he’ll call back later before cutting his phone, and makes his way over to where the crying is coming from. He opens the door to the foyer, where Jimin and Taehyung stand with tears rolling down their cheeks.

Seokjin crouches down so he matches their height, making his voice soft to soothe the kids. “Can you tell me what happened?”

“Jin-hyung,” Jimin hiccups, running into Seokjin. Seokjin instantly wraps his arms around the six year old like it’s second nature to him. “Taetae… he… he…”

“I’m sorry!” Taehyung cries, guilt clear on his face. “I didn’t mean to…”

Words no longer decipherable, Taehyung cries loudly, little fists reaching up to rub his eyes. Seokjin gently stops Taehyung from rubbing his eyes, making sure he’s soft and approachable. Soft eyes, soft smile, a silent promise that he won’t tell him off. Seokjin needs to know the situation before he can try to diffuse the crying.

“It hurts,” Jimin whines, looking at the pink mark on his arm. Seokjin follows his gaze, finally noticing the pink on his skin. It looks like something hit him. Or someone.

“Taetae,” Seokjin says softly. “Did you hurt Jimin?”

“I didn’t mean to,” Taehyung cries a little louder, sobs turning into hiccups.

“It’s okay, Taetae, I know you didn’t mean to. I won’t tell you off,” Seokjin gives the six year old a smile, extending an arm so Taehyung can join Jimin in Seokjin’s arms. “Come here so we can kiss Jimin’s pain away.”

Taehyung nods, bringing himself into Seokjin’s arms, cuddling into Jimin and kissing the red mark. Seokjin does the same.

“Do you feel better, Jimin?”

Jimin nods, and Taehyung cries a little more, this time from relief. He hugs Jimin, and the two cry together, repeats of I’m sorry cried out.

The room quietens, the crying settling down to little sniffles. Seokjin can’t help but smile a little as he rubs their backs. Until he hears rummaging in the kitchen, and Seokjin realises that there was another small child in the house. One that has been mysteriously absent, despite his friends crying loudly by the living area. Seokjin clicks his tongue, knowing exactly what the little brat is doing in the kitchen.

Picking up Jimin and Taehyung, (and getting a few giggles from them,) Seokjin makes his way to the kitchen. There, just as Seokjin suspected, is Jungkook, hand in the cookie jar where Seokjin keeps the cookies that he bakes.

“Jungkook,” Seokjin says, voice low and threatening. The five year old brat flinches and turns slowly to face Seokjin, doe eyes wide with fear. Jimin and Taehyung are also suddenly quiet, still hanging from his arms. “What are you doing?”

Jungkook quickly take his hand out of the cookie jar, frown forming on his face, fists clenched and ready for a fight. “It’s not fair! You only give us one cookie each!”

“Do you know how much sugar is in a cookie?”

“But Jin!” Jungkook whines.

“That’s appa to you, young man,” Seokjin snaps, before realising that it may have come out a little too harsh. Jungkook’s bottom lip quivers, but he tries his best to keep strong. He’s five years old now. Five years old is a whole hand of fingers. That’s a big number.

“Jungkook,” Seokjin says, putting Jimin and Taehyung down so he can crouch to match Jungkook’s eye level. “I wouldn’t mind giving you another if you ask nicely.”

“You always say no,” Jungkook pouts. Tears start forming in his eyes, but Jungkook shakes them away. “That’s why we had to do the plan.”

Seokjin furrows his eyebrows. “The plan?”

Jimin makes a strange squeak sound, and Seokjin realises that the two crying kids have been oddly quiet since discovering Jungkook in the kitchen. He whips around to face them and when they flinch, Seokjin suspects that this ‘plan’ might have caused the crying earlier.

“Please don’t tell Jimin off!” Taehyung exclaims, confirming Seokjin’s suspicions, and standing in front of Jimin and defending him with his arms wide. “He’s a good boy. I promise!”

Seokjin tries his best not too coo at how cute Taehyung is, heart clenching as he tries to keep his face straight. “Don’t worry. I just want to know what this plan is.”

Jungkook looks down with guilt, murmuring something about how it was his idea. He looks up to Seokjin, notices that his dad isn’t looking at him, sniffles a little, but tries not to cry. He looks down at his hands and counts his age. One, two, three, four, five. Big number. He’s not little anymore. He’s strong.

“I hit Jiminie so Kookie can get the cookies,” Taehyung says, tears now starting to roll down his face, arms still out wide to protect his friend. Jimin hides behind Taehyung, eyes brimming with tears again, but looks just as guilty as the other two.

Seokjin sighs. “That’s not fair on Jimin, now is it?”

“No,” Taehyung sobs.

“I’m disappointed to hear about his,” Seokjin says, looking at the three of them. “I’m going to have to say no cookies today, do you understand?”

Taehyung and Jimin nod, tears now full on streaming down their faces. They weren’t good boys today. No cookies makes them sad, but Jimin was hurt. Hurting Jimin makes Taehyung even more sad. He gives his friend a kiss on his sore spot again, a silent apology for what happened.

Seokjin turns to Jungkook, who’s still holding his tears in. Fists clenched, he knows how guilty he is. But the cookies. He wants a cookie, even if it’s just one.

“Jungkook,” Seokjin says softly. “Do you understand?”

“I understand,” he mutters.

“Appa is sorry for raising his voice at you before,” Seokjin says, giving Jungkook a soft smile and running his hand through his son’s hair. Jungkook sniffles. But he won’t cry because he’s five and that’s a big number.

“Kookie is sorry for trying to take the cookies.”

Seokjin smiles, pulling Jungkook into a hug. “Good boy.”

The tears are too powerful for his eyes, and they start rolling down his cheeks as he cries into his dads chest. He wants to stop crying but Seokjin’s smooth rubbing on his back is so soothing that he lets all of his tears and loud sobs out.

“I’m strong,” Jungkook hiccups in between sobs.

Smile still on his face, Seokjin pats his son’s back with a soothing beat. “You’re very strong, Kookie.”

(Seokjin ends up giving the boys a cookie each. He can’t help it. He’s weak for puppy eyes and a strong boy’s tears.)

#btsghostiebingo #btsghostie #ficswithluv #btswriterscollective #bangtanarmynet #btsguild #btsbookclub #bangtanhq #magicshopnet #btswritingcafe #bangtanfairygarden #bangtanidx #bangtanscenery #bts scenario #bts scenarios #dad!jin #platonic #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #jin #jungkook #jimin #v #jeon jungkook #park jimin #kim taehyung #kim seokjin #bts crack #bts fluff #fluff

[princekoo]

dusk till dawn | kth.

pairing. taehyung x female! reader

genre/prompt. misunderstandings, marriage! au, angst

word count. 1.2k

content.  none questionable, maybe hinted cheating? but it’s a misunderstanding so not entirely

synopsis. You trusted him with your heart, but after seeing him with another, could you again?

writer’s note. written for the BTS Ghostie Writers Net’s writing bingo! It’s not based off the song of the same name but I did listen to it while writing. This is my last square in the row I chose :) Everything flowed out surprisingly quickly for this one. Like it took one hour at most, but I’m proud of it. 

    The flickering of lights showed little solace to the broken heart which you nursed. As you clutched your body, shaking with the sobs which consumed it, the broken pieces of your heart before you seemed to mock your naïveté. You’d placed the entirety of your trust on his palm only for him to close it and crush it. It’s not as though you could deny yourself of his blatant infidelity. You’d watched it happen after all. The Louboutin stilettos you’d picked for today which were once on your feet laid at the door of your shared bedroom with the one which you though was your beloved. You’d dressed up to surprise him and yet, all you’d found once you neared his office was your heart cracking. The journey home was filled with questions of superficial concern uttered by those which served your husband, but you couldn’t bring yourself to do anything but nod and send a watery fake smile. Every minute you’d spent replaying the scene you walked into caused your heart to shatter just a bit more, making it so by the time you walked numbly into the bedroom, your knees buckled and your face gave out. Your face of pretense was unable to be kept any longer than it already had been put up. No, everything was not okay.

    You weren’t meant to walk into that, that much you were aware. After all, why would it be intended for you to find your husband with his shareholder’s mouth on his? No, you hadn’t stayed long enough to watch as he pushed her forcibly away from himself and break their contract. How could you stay that long? Your weakened heart didn’t allow it. You’d read too much about this, all of your friends had gone through this, everyone had told you of the possibility of this. An affair. Your vehement refusal of the fact that your husband, sweet and lovesick Kim Taehyung, would partake in such a vile thing. He was always similar to a lost puppy when it came to you after all. He’d worked so hard to get you, it was almost laughable how it’d never popped into your mind. The biggest question in your mind as you laid on the floor of the darkened bedroom who’s only light was that of a candle was ‘what do I do now?’. A fairly simple question which would garner several answers with which you, however, did not want to partake in. As much as it devastated you, you couldn’t bring yourself to loathe him. As much as every breath with his betrayal in your mind hurt, you didn’t want to end things with him. Even if it hurt, you wanted him by your side. You wanted—no, needed— to forget what you saw. Your body and mind craved for him reassurance, his warmth. If he denied and was not truthful, you couldn’t bring yourself to care.

    The soft thumping of sock clad feet resounded, nearing the door you had shut in haste to hide yourself to the world. The soft knocking went not unnoticed, but ignored by you. It wasn’t until you felt the familiar warmth of your lover pressed to your back and his soft lips meeting your cold skin in comfort that you reacted at all. Your sobs had subsided, but as his broad frame embraced your smaller one, you’d started to let out cries of despair. He whispered simple words of comfort, attempting to subdue your audible grief. It had worked. After what seemed like a couple minutes, you’d be reduced to sniffling.

    “I know you saw. I saw you run in those... towers by the door.” You made no attempt to respond at his attempt of a joke. You didn’t know what would be acceptable in a situation like this for your well-being.

    “I’m going to be truthful, as I always am with you, my love. Please don’t doubt me, I beg you. I love you too much to let you go like this. Please... please look at me, my love.” You’d zoned into how his chest tumbled as he spoke. His words were gentle and full of genuine sencerity. You’d trusted him all these years, it’s not like you can’t bring yourself to again. Still, you’d graced him with nothing but silence. He sighed, knowing he couldn’t do anything but wait. Slowly, his words registered into your brain and just as slowly you attempted to face him from your kneeling position on the floor. He looked just like when you’d both met at the coffee shop you worked at. He would come in every morning despite having several assistants which would break their back to do anything he asked of them. Yet, he’d always make time to pick up his order every morning. He’d never pick up coffee, which you found peculiar for someone who looked like a businessman. He’d always pick something sweet paired with some pastry you offered at the location. Every day for two years he’d never failed to show up every morning until he, finally, asked you out. One could only guess the chain of events that happened before this moment. It was nothing short of sickeningly sweet and fairy-tale raquel days. This, however, was the first and biggest hurdle your relationship decided to encounter. How cruel could life be? He looked nearly the same, just a few minimal wrinkles of age here and there which would show as he did different expressions. He was still the same, however, and that hurt. How could the same Taehyung you knew all this time do such a thing to you?

    His expression was that of soft panic, his fear of losing you outshining any other emotion. You both looked at eachother for a few more seconds or minutes, maybe, before he continued.

    “i’m not going to say it was an accident.” The scattered pieces of your heart showed new cracks within them. They’d be nothing but dust by the end, you figured. You looked down at the floor.

    “I knew she was intending to kiss me. I didn’t think she’d try to, though. You have to believe me when I tell you it wasn’t something i wanted. I’ve done everything I can to keep things professional between us, but she doesn’t get tired of trying. I didn’t know she would do this. Ple—please look at me.” Could you believe him? You closed your eyes and inhaled a heavy breath, laden with your insecurities. Looking into his eyes, maybe it was wishful thinking, you saw they held the only emotion he’d retained throughout his his entire ordeal: sincerity. You could see even remorse. His brain was filled with ‘If only’ and ‘I should’ve’ thoughts. He hoped—desperately—you could believe him. He’d heard many in his position talk of this situation happening and he didn’t want the end they described to happen.

    “I know I should’ve pushed her off as soon as she neared me, but she always flirts with me and never steps over the line. I should’ve done it immediately, but I was stunned. If checking the cameras will make you happy then I’ll arrange so that you can look at the footage.” He suggested his voice softening and lifting into what sounded like a question. You took his cheeks in your warming hands and softly pecked him. You’d believe him, even if your brain screamed that he wasn’t being truthful. Even if your body didn’t want to believe the truth he spoke, you trusted him with your life.

-o-

© princegguk — all rights reserved. reposting/modifying of any medium and translations are not allowed.

#btsghostiebingo #v imagine #taehyung imagine #taehyung angst #v angst #bts imagine #bts angst #v fanfiction #taehyung fanfiction #v scenarios #taehyung scenarios #bts scenarios #taehyung x reader #marriage! au #misunderstandings #angst #short

[cinnaminsvga]

17 | badboy!hoseok

17. ❝ things you said that i wish you hadn’t❞ genre: fluff, suggestive stuff // words: 1.1K  a/n: part of the btsghostiebingo challenge!! my prompt was “stealing looks.”

“is it really that difficult to keep your mouth shut? even occasionally?” your voice is thick with exasperation despite the gentleness of your ministrations. you’ve just about finished wrapping the last of his injuries, your first-aid kit on the cusp of going empty. jung hoseok stays seated atop your bed, his gaze planted guiltily to the floor while you knelt, rubbing antiseptic on his cuts.

“would it make you feel better if i said he deserved it?” hoseok is sheepish, so unlike the rough and rugged club brawler that many people knew him as. when he’s with you, he’s just hobi. no masks, no facades to upkeep. if anyone figured out how soft he was in real life, he fears that his fierce reputation might become unsalvageable. “besides, he threw the first punch! all i did was call him a pathetic, predatory, piece of shi–“

“hobi,” you interrupt, causing him to clamp his mouth shut immediately, “the poor boy was a newbie at the ring. you were just as cocky when you first entered the bighit club, and we both know it,” you tut, slapping his abdomen where most of his bruises were. he wheezes, gently cradling his stomach as he pouts pathetically at you.

“he tried hitting on you, y/n! he was sending you these dirty looks and i will not let that little shit think he’s hot shit just because he’s 20 pounds of muscle heavier than me!”

“jungkook is also a teenager. all boys are horny and stupid at that age,” you snort, sealing his wrap bandages tight. when you sit back to appraise him, he looks more like a mummy than a human. “hell. you were just as rude when we first met. remember how you wouldn’t stop staring at my ass for the first three weeks?”

hoseok’s pout deepens, his cute dimples making an appearance for the first time that night. no one ever gets to see them except for you, because only you ever managed to make him show any emotion other than his signature cold, calculating stare. when you’re face to face with him like this, it’s hard to imagine that he’s one of the highest-ranked brawlers in the city. hell, it had taken you a few weeks to really get your head around the fact.

“yeah, but you were single at the time. he should know that you’re a taken woman.”

“hoseok,” you roll your eyes, but your traitorous heart was doing flip-flops in your chest. you hate to admit it, but seeing hoseok jealous is kind of endearing. he hardly shows his possessive side, since most of the boys at the club knew to keep their distance. after working as a bartender at the underground club for years now, none of the members have bothered you ever since you stabbed a guy in the balls when he didn’t have the intelligence to understand that no means no.

hoseok gestures for you to get up, wiggling towards the head of your bed and patting the empty space beside him. “come on! baby me for one night, okay? my fragile masculinity is on the verge of collapse,” he groans, but the soft grin on his face tells you that he’s joking. you huff, standing up but not making a move to join him.

“give me a second, infant. i wanna get out of my work clothes before i get on the bed. i smell.” you hear hoseok let out a small giggle, and it warms you from the inside out. giggly and whiney hobi is a secret only you know, and you’d bring that secret to the grave if you have to.

what’s not to like? gruff, stoic bad boy is actually a cutie in bed? you never did figure out how you had gotten so lucky with him. though you do wish he’d keep his fists to himself, at least when he’s outside the ring.

you can feel his eyes on you when you begin to undress; you’ve always loved the attention, especially when it’s from him. it’s partly why you enjoy teasing him at work, trying to bend over often, wearing tighter clothing than necessary, talking lower and slower.

you never do interact with him directly when you’re at work as you’re a professional above all else. you might be working in an underground fight club, but that didn’t mean you were going to let a relationship interfere with your work. but that didn’t stop you from teasing, enjoying the way he tries to steal looks even though you always knew when he was staring.

it just so happened that tonight, you had gotten another unplanned spectator, which caused an impromptu brawl to transpire alongside the official one happening inside the ring. and now, you had a beaten and bandaged boy on your bed, begging for cuddles and something more.

“come on, babe! you’re so mean,” hoseok whines, making grabby hands at you when you unclasp your bra. your back is turned, and you don’t give him the pleasure of seeing you when you quickly put on a nightshirt. he’s full-on glowering when you turn to face him, the ridiculous sight making you giggle uncontrollably.

“you look like a child who was denied their binky,” you say, finally joining him on the bed. he immediately wraps you in a tight embrace, smattering kisses along your neck that gets you laughing breathlessly. “hobi! stop, that tickles!”

“that’s what you get, you temptress!” his voice is muffled against your skin, but you don’t ask him to repeat himself when he starts tracing his lips lower, dragging your shirt off from your shoulder to give him more space. “even before that lil bitch boy was making eyes at you, i was making eyes at you! lil baby man wouldn’t be able to handle you even he wanted.”

“oh?” your pitch heightens, further encouraging hoseok to snake his hand up your shirt, touching and kneading you until you’re moaning softly into the dim room. “and you can handle me?”

“let me remind you tonight,” hoseok’s demeanor changes, becoming more reminiscent of the boy on the ring than the one who you had come to know and love. but you’ve already realized this a long time ago; that both sides of him are equally as enticing and easy to want. your eyes fall shut, smirking softly to yourself.

“don’t say things you don’t mean, hoseok. you’ll make me wish you hadn’t said it.”

“i don’t make promises i can’t keep, y/n. when i’m finished with you, i’ll make sure everyone will know how i well i treat you.”

#btsghostiebingo #hyunglinenetwork #networkbangtan #bts scenarios #hoseok x reader #bts x reader #bts reader insert #bts fanfiction #bts #bts imagines #bts fluff #badboy!au #jung hoseok #hoseok #j hope #hoseok scenarios #hoseok fluff #bangtan #bts fanfic #am i gonna finish this bingo challenge... who tf knows... LMAO #well at least i got one out :^) #who wouldve thought i'd ever write a badboy au LMFAO cant say its super well written... oh well

[euphoria-vmin7]

tiger flower | jjk

pairing: jeon jungkook x reader 

genre/warnings: angst, hanahaki! au, non-idol! au, heartbreak, unrequited love, swearing, a n g s t

word count: 1,830

summary: tiger flower. it’s his birth flower. it’s the flower that you can’t have. 

rating: pg-15 (swearing) 

-- a/n: so this is my first submission for the BGW BINGO BASH! i was listening to crystal snow and then i got really inspired and so this was born at 2 am :) it’s for the “hanahaki!au” square. i hope you all like this! 

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ஓ๑♡๑ஓ 

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“Dammit (Name)!” Jungkook groaned, throwing his hands up in the air with utter disbelief. “Why the fuck did you kill me?!” 

You winced and shot him a glare. “I’ve never played this before!” 

“Well I wouldn’t have let you play if I’d known you’d suck this bad,” Jungkook tossed his controller to the side as you struggled to keep fighting on your own. Sadly, your character died pretty quickly without the help of the expert gamer next to you. You turned fully to grin at his angry scowl and punched his shoulder, which of course didn’t faze him at all. Stupid muscles. 

“Oh quit being such a baby, Kook,”  you teased, leaning back to lounge against his worn out couch. “It’s just a game,” 

“A game you suck at,” he muttered, standing up and heading into his kitchen. You chuckled at his salty tone. You had probably just broken his spotless winning streak or lost him his spot on the leaderboard or something trivial like that. Well, it was trivial to you, but obviously not to him. Jungkook lumbered back into the living room, shooting you a pointed glare before plopping down next to you. He tossed you a bag of chips and grabbed the remote to fiddle with the channels on his television. You raised your legs and draped them over Jungkook’s lap, an excessive show of making yourself comfortable that earned you another glare. 

“I don’t need your sweaty feet in my face while I’m eating my precious chips, (Name),” he snapped irritably. 

“Well there are a lot of things you don't need but you get them anyway,” 

“Fuck you,”  

Despite all his complaining, Jungkook didn’t make any move to get your feet off his lap, an action that made you grin when you realized it. You watched with a sweet concealed smile as he lazily shoved chips into his mouth, not minding how much he was spilling on his old grey hoodie. You chuckled quietly. What a slob. 

Technically speaking, it had only been about three weeks since you had last seen Jungkook. You both had headed to your hometowns for break to spend the winter holidays with your families, which was basically the only time you were apart. It had only been three weeks, and yet somehow it felt like lifetimes. Maybe it was because he was so deeply ingrained into your daily life. Maybe it was the play fights that normally ended with you holding an ice pack to your shoulder. Or maybe it was the spontaneous knocks on his apartment door at two in the morning with nothing but the pajamas on your back. Or maybe it was the hushed whispers of childish secrets under fortresses made of blankets and pillows. 

Or maybe, it was just him. 

Maybe it was because you just missed seeing that annoying yet frustratingly pretty face that told you he was up to no good. Maybe it was the disarmingly handsome and boyish smile that fueled the competitive rage within you. Maybe it was how despite all his tricky smirks and winks, he still looked like he was hand carved by angels when he slept, like they had put utmost care in crafting the most perfect human in the universe. 

Maybe. 

You should’ve known better than to let these thoughts fill your head once again. You could daydream about how much you hated and loved Jeon Jungkook for hours. If only he’d actually let you do it in peace. 

His fingers twisted mercilessly into the skin of your thigh and you yelped at the sting. It was partly your fault seeing as you had made it easy for him by putting your feet right in front of him. But still how dare he?

“Are you even listening to me?” he asked, letting his fingers rest after the sharp pinch. It was your turn to glare at him and you reeled your foot back to kick his knee, not too hard but not gently either. 

“No. I don’t listen to stupid things,” 

You knew what he was thinking: That’s such an eight year old thing to say.

Well joke’s on him. If you were eight years old then so was he. 

“I was asking you...” he rolled his eyes, leaning back to stare at the TV again. “...how your break was?” 

“It was good,” you smiled a bit. “Spent time with my family. Had my dad’s food after dealing with your horrible cooking for so long,” 

Instead of the same glare you had been on the receiving end of for the better portion of the night, Jungkook rewarded your statement with a good-natured chuckle. At least he knew his cooking was subpar. You grinned. 

“How about you?” 

“Ah y’know? Same thing as you. Spent time with the family blah blah. We went on a road trip,” 

“Nice,” you sighed, still smiling as you leaned back into the couch and closed your eyes. “You came back a week earlier than I did though,” 

“Yeah that’s because you and your family took that fancy trip to Europe,” he mocked and you smirked. 

“You could at least try to pretend you aren’t jealous,” 

Jungkook scoffed out a chuckle and began surfing his channels again, letting a comfortable silence overtake the both of you. Well, of course it was comfortable. Awkwardness was not a thing when it came to you and your best friend. Keeping your eyes closed for too long almost always led you to falling asleep, and you would have gotten there this time too, if it wasn’t for the sudden yell from the boy next to you. 

“Oh fuck, wait! I forgot to tell you!” he screeched, his eyes going wide. You jumped, eyes peeling open before scowling at him and punching his bicep. 

“What the fuck, Jeon? What is it!?” 

“So while you were gone...I did it,” he grinned, sitting up straight. Immediately, you knew what it meant. As much as you wanted to pretend like you didn’t get it, you knew. The way his cheeks began to slowly bloom with color was another huge giveaway. That only happened for one thing. 

“Shut up,” your jaw dropped, lips twitching upward. “You didn’t!” 

“I did,” he said proudly. His smile was so genuine, so real, and it made you so indescribably happy. And yet it didn’t. 

“And?” you pressed, moving to sit on your knees and grabbing his arm. 

“And…” he drew out with a concealed smile. “And she said yes!” 

You cheered loudly and he laughed, his arms naturally coming to wrap around you and give you a squeeze. You giggled at the feeling, the feeling of comfort that came from being next to him, with him. 

“Aw I’m so happy for you, Kookie,” you mumbled, smiling so hard your cheeks hurt. His laugh shook his whole body as you buried your face into his sweatshirt. 

“Thanks Peanut,” he chuckled. “I was so fucking nervous you should’ve seen me,” 

The thought of your normally confident and suave best friend being all flustered brought a smile to your face. Oh, how you wished you could’ve been the one to see it. 

“Yeah that’s because you’re scared of girls,” you teased. It was a running joke amongst Jungkook’s closest friends. A joke that obviously wasn’t very true. 

“And what about you?” he laughed. “Are you not a girl?” 

“I’m not that type of girl to you,” you smiled ruefully. 

“Nah,” he grinned, his eyes shining in blissful ignorance. “You’re my special girl,” 

But not that type of special. 

Other than the smile you gave him, you didn’t respond to that. You don’t know what to say to it anymore. You stayed there for a few more minutes, shamefully enjoying Jungkook’s arms around you. You hid your weak smile from him because he’d immediately be able to catch how upset it was. How selfish could you be to take advantage of his love for you? He loves you. You’re his special girl. He said it himself. He’s not lying. 

But you’re lying to yourself when you say that it means something. It means something. But not what you want it to.

How many times had you shakily typed into the search bar: How to confess to your best friend?

How many more times would you need to type before you realized what you already knew?

Jungkook gently pushed you off of him, not in a way that was intentionally cruel and yet somehow it felt that way. He stood up and stretched, a tired groan leaving his lips as he popped a few joints. 

“I’m going to bed. Are you coming?” 

“In a few,” you smiled, the facade taking over you easily. Of course, after all this time, the practice had made you a master at hiding. He grinned at you, the boyish grin that masked the tiredness in his eyes. Tired eyes that lit up when they looked at you. But sparkled and softened when they looked at her. 

You sat there on the couch for a while, a few measly minutes that felt as though they were stretched into long hours. Thinking like this, alone, was dangerous for you. No matter how many times you’d tried to clear it, Jungkook remained, his hold on you becoming stronger as every second passed. It wouldn’t get any easier in the future. You knew this and you knew it well. 

The pain in your chest came fast and familiar. You brought your hand up to your lips to muffle the sound of your harsh cough. Pulling it away, you looked down at the petals in your palm. 

Tiger Flower. 

Poetic isn’t it? His birth flower. You smiled at your palm. With your other hand, you reached into the small bag at your feet, the bag reserved for overnight stays at Jungkook’s house. The pamphlet you pulled out was curled at the edges and crumpled in certain areas due to how much time you had spent looking through it. 

Your mom had told you about the surgery as soon as the petals started coming. Everyone was worried, because they knew what would happen if you let it go. Everyone except him of course. Poor thing, he didn’t even know. 

You stood up and walked into the bathroom to dust the petals into the trash. 

You couldn’t bring yourself to let Jungkook go. There was no pain that would be greater to you. Jungkook was real and he was the only real thing that mattered to you. You were his special girl. How could you even think of letting him go? 

Chuckling to yourself, you made the decision and felt your heart tear. 

You grasped the pamphlet in both hands and tore it in half, then quarters, then eighths, until it was nothing more than uneven shreds in your palms. With a bittersweet smile, you dusted the shreds into Jungkook’s trash can, before following him into his room, ready to build another fortress of blankets.

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#btsguild #btswriterscollective #btsbookclub #btsghostiebingo #bts x reader #jungkook x reader #jungkook angst #jungkook one shot #jeon jungkook #bts jungkook #bts #bts fanfiction #bts one shot #jeon jungkook x reader #bts angst #jungkook #bts au #jeon jeongguk #jungkook fluff

[lavenderlattaes]

the night we met. | jeon jeongguk

⇒ summary: and on a cold winter’s night just before the start of a brand new year, you meet a boy who changes your entire new year for the better. 

⇒ [ ghost! au ]

⇒ pairing: jeon jeongguk x reader

⇒ word count: 4.7k words

⇒ genre: light fluff, angst

⇒ warnings: mentions of cheating, breakup, and death

⇒ note: hello! it’s been so long since i wrote a long bts fic, huh? but i’m back again with a new one and this is one of my entries to @btsghostiewritersnet​ ‘s Bingo Bash! It falls under my ghost! au tile and i hope you guys like this! please don’t hesitate to tell me what you think. enjoy! (also this is the third time im reposting bc the tags haven’t been working for me hhh)  ＼ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ／

i.

The cold night air nips at your frozen, flushed cheeks as you hold back tears. Of all the days of the year, why did you have to end up alone and heartbroken on New Year’s Eve? Your tired, Timberland boots clad feet lead you to the park you frequented with your boyfriend before he decided to lock lips with someone else that wasn’t you. You walk past the benches and the playground and find yourself by the crystal lake that was still frozen over by the cold winter. You crouch down on your feet, your fingers reaching out to glide across the icy surface.

You sniffle softly, your mind going back to the events a few hours prior as your heart breaks. You shut your eyes tightly and let the tears fall freely, the hot tears warming up your frozen cheeks. Loud, heartbreaking sobs wrack your entire body until you can hardly breathe anymore.

Stupid, stupid, stupid. 

How could he do that to you? How could he break your heart in the most cliché way possible? How could he break his promise of a forever with you? You were stupid to think he’d actually love you for as long as you breathed the same air, for as long as you lived.

“You’re going to get sick if you keep crying out here in this cold weather.” A shy, timid voice rings out from behind you, and your sobs quiet down slowly. You immediately wipe your tears away, and sniffle again before turning around.

Your eyes lock with a pair of soft, gentle, brown, doe-like eyes the moment you turn around. A handsome boy around your age stares at you, his hands buried deep in his pockets. You break away from his glance momentarily to wipe the few tears that still manage to escape. You let out another gentle sniffle before standing up. You brush your hands against your jeans, the snow falling down your fingers and down onto the ground.

Your eyes, nose, and cheeks are all red now, and the boy purses his lips before pulling out a small handkerchief. His right hand extends out to you, offering the small piece of cloth. You look at it and back up at his face. He stares at you and you timidly reach forward, taking it. You give him a small nod and he just nods back, as you turn to the side slightly, blowing your nose into it. He lets out a chuckle at that, and you feel your cheeks heat up. 

“Thanks,” you whisper once you’re done, and you stuff the handkerchief into your pocket as you turn back to face him. 

“Why were you crying?” The boy asks and you sigh, plopping back down onto the ground. He approaches you gently, before going down on his knees to sit beside you. You glance at him to find his gaze trained on the empty, frozen lake in front of you both.

“My boyfriend cheated and broke up with me,” you answer, the words leaving a bitter taste in your mouth. 

“On New Year’s Eve?” The boy asks again and you nod, as he chuckles. You turn to look at him with a light frown.

“What’s so funny?” 

“My girlfriend broke up with me too on New Year’s Eve,” the boy tells you, and he turns to meet your gaze.

“Maybe you weren’t supposed to spend the next year together. Maybe this happened to you because you’re supposed to be with someone better than him.” He says softly, as the wind blows around you both, making you shiver lightly. The boy notices you shivering and shrugs his thick coat off, throwing it around your shoulders.

“It’s okay, I’m fine,” you try to decline but he shakes his head. “You’ve been crying, you know. You need to warm up if you don’t want to get sick.”

“Thanks,” you mutter, pulling the coat tighter around you.

“I’m Jeongguk.” The boy finally introduces himself and you manage to crack a small smile.

“I’m Y/N.”

ii.

An incessant tapping sound rings in your bedroom in the middle of the night, waking you up in the process. You groan from the annoying noise, rolling over in your sheets as you try to get yourself to get out of bed.

Tap, tap, tap.

“Y/N, open up!” you hear a familiar voice call your name, making your eyes snap open, fully awake now.

You get up and rush over to the window, your eyes meeting those same, doe-like, eyes you first met one year ago. He grins at you, the corners of his eyes crinkling up in amusement as you squint at him, your fingers reaching over to unlock the window. The cold air brushes inside the room as you let the boy in.

Jeongguk lands on his feet gracefully, barely making a sound against the hardwood floor. He glances at you with a grin as you roll your eyes at him.

“What are you doing here? It’s late,” you ask him, walking back to your bed. He climbs in with you, crossing his legs as he leans on his arms for support, facing you.

“It’s been exactly one year since we met, don’t you remember?” your best friend grins at you as your mind finally registers the date. Your eyes glance at the digital clock perched on your bedside, and the red numbers glare in the dark room. 

12:03 am, 2021-12-31.

“Happy one year of friendship…?” You suggest sheepishly, turning back to face the boy. He grins and lunges forward at you, trapping you in a bone-crushing hug. Your body falls back on the bed as Jeongguk moves his full weight on top of you, making you whine.

“You’re heavy!” You choke out from underneath him, but he only lets out his melodious laughter ring out in the quiet room.

“Oh, come on, you love me!” He giggles and you’re furiously slapping his back, trying to get him off of you.

“If I say that, will you get off of me?” you breathe out and he immediately rolls off to the side, making you gasp for air dramatically. He rolls his eyes before perching his head up on his arm. He turns to your side, grinning at you as you glare at him playfully.

“For real though,” you begin once you’ve caught your breath, “I really do love you.” You admit, the sincerity in your voice and the gentleness of your tone making the atmosphere suddenly shift. It’s silent now, and Jeongguk just stares at you, his mouth partly open.

“You made me happier. I thought I didn’t want to keep smiling after what my boyfriend did. I know he doesn’t deserve me pining over him so hopelessly but I still continued believing he would somehow tell me it was all in my head. I hoped he would chase after me that night, but he never did.” You say quietly, your eyes trained on the ceiling. It was covered in stars, not the plastic, glow-in-the-dark kind, but hand-painted stars that Jeongguk and you both painted a few months ago. Well, he did most of it while you just cheered him on, dancing around in your room to whatever was playing on his Spotify radio back then.

Jeongguk’s free hand comes up to cup your face, turning your cheek to face him. “I just wanted to see you smile. That’s all that I ever really wanted. You looked so sad when we first met. I’ve never seen anyone so sorrowful that I even felt my own heart breaking.”

Maybe it was the way he looked at you — like you were his entire world, or the way he cupped your face in his hand — like you were some delicate china doll he couldn’t bear to break, or the way he always hugged you — like he never wanted to let go, that made you realize maybe you’ve already fallen for your best friend. 

Maybe you really were supposed to break up with your boyfriend before you welcomed the new year because you were supposed to spend that new year with Jeon Jeongguk instead.

“I love you.”

The words fall past your lips and out into the silent night. It doesn’t register in your mind until Jeongguk smiles softly at you, leaning in close to kiss your forehead.

“I love you too.”

You smile up at him and he just scoots closer to you on the bed, wrapping his arms around you tightly. That night, you fall asleep in Jeongguk’s warm embrace, your breaths mingling, your hearts beating at the same slow, steady, and calm pace.

When you wake up the next day, he’s gone. It doesn’t faze you though, because he’s always snuck inside your room late at night and left before you woke up. But a small part of you hoped that he would be there when he woke up, especially since things have somehow changed between you now.

His scent still lingers in the air, and the side of your bed where he lay was still warm, the sheets slightly crinkled. A small note peaked out from underneath your phone, and you know it’s from him. The handwriting says it all.

Meet me at the lake later tonight. i love you <3

A smile makes its way onto your face, instantly boosting your mood for the rest of the day.

And just like one year ago, the cold night air nips at your frozen, flushed cheeks as this time, you try to hold back an excited smile. You take excited skips toward the park, your fingers brushing along the benches and the trees. You reach the frozen lake, your smile blooming once you recall the events from last year. You crouch down onto your knees again, your fingers drawing on the icy surface as you wait for him.

“I hope you’re not crying like last year,” Jeongguk’s playful voice rings out from behind you and you immediately turn around to face him.

“Why would I -” your smile drops from your face when you see Jeongguk’s red eyes and nose. Tears are falling down his face as the wind blows softly, making you shiver.

“Hey, are you okay?” you ask softly, walking over to him. He purses his lips, his dimples popping out as he tries to stop the tears from falling.

“I’m sorry.” The cursed words you’ve despised the most leave his lips.

“Why? Why are you sorry?” you plead, reaching forward to grasp his hands in yours.

“I can’t be with you.” Jeongguk whispers, his breath shaky as he grips onto your hands tighter.

“Why not? Why are you doing this to me now? After telling me you love me?” You’re crying now, and Jeongguk’s sobs get quieter as he slowly calms himself.

“You’re going to have to be happy without me now, okay? I’ve spent an entire year with you now, I need to go.” He explains, letting go of your hands to cup your face.

You shake your head furiously, your hands coming up to hold his wrists. The wind was blowing harshly around you, making you both shiver but it can’t possibly be colder than the ice crawling into your heart right now. 

“Don’t leave me.” You cry out, making both of your hearts break. 

Jeongguk’s thumbs wipe your tears away, before he leans in to kiss your forehead again. “I can’t stay here with you, Y/N. It would be selfish of me to stay.”

“Why? Where are you going?” You ask desperately, your eyes searching for some sort of sign that he’s just lying. But over the past year that you’ve come to know him, you’ve learned how to read him better than anyone else. You know him like the back of your hand. He never hides his emotions when he’s with you. And he’s never lied to you, not even once. 

“Somewhere far away and I’m not coming back,” he answers truthfully and you know it in the way he doesn’t stutter and in the way he holds your face gently. You close your eyes, letting more tears fall down your flushed cheeks as you feel the same biting cold from just over a year ago. Only this time, it hurts more in your heart than it does on your cheeks.

“Even when I’m gone, I’ll always be here,” he whispers, placing your hand above your heart as you feel your steady heartbeat. “I’m never going to truly leave you behind, Y/N. But I need you to be happy even without me. Can you promise me that?” he crouches down to your height, tucking a finger under your chin, prompting you to look at him.

“It’s going to be hard, but can you do it? For me?” He adds, caressing your hair gently as you give him a slow, hesitant nod that still manages to shatter your heart into a million pieces.

“That’s my angel.” He coos with a soft smile, pulling you in for a tight hug. You cry into his chest, wrapping your arms tightly around his waist as he kisses the crown of your head repeatedly. 

“Will I see you again?” you ask, pulling away as you stare up at his doe-like eyes that made you fall for him in the first place. He smiles, and leans forward to kiss you on the lips for the very first time, and the last. You kiss him back, pouring all of your love into the only kiss you ever get to share with Jeon Jeongguk.

“One day, angel. When it’s time for you to see me again.” He pulls you into a hug again, wrapping you tight in his warm embrace. For the first time that night, you don’t feel the cold. All you can feel is Jeongguk’s warmth spreading all throughout your entire body. You close your eyes, relishing in the feeling of being wrapped in his arms.

“I love you, always remember that.” Jeongguk whispers. 

And when you open your eyes, he’s gone.

You take ragged breaths, wiping away the tears hastily as the coldness starts creeping into your heart again. You turn around, hoping to find a glimpse of his retreating form or even just his shadow but you find nothing. Not even a trace of his footsteps on the snow, or his scent lingering in the air.

It was as if Jeon Jeongguk was merely a figment of your imagination.

And you cry. You cry, and you cry your eyes out until you can’t breathe, until your throat hurts from screaming, until your mouth feels dry. You drop onto your knees, the snow seeping into your jeans, soaking your skin with the icy coldness. But it still can’t compare to the ice that has now fully coated your breaking heart.

iii.

“Y/N? Y/N, can you hear me?” A masculine voice calls out in the darkness, and you squint your eyes, opening them slowly. A bright, white light greets you, and when your eyes finally adjust to the brightness, you’re staring into the eyes of a doctor.

“Hello, Y/N. I’m Doctor Kim. How are you feeling?” He asks gently, giving you a gentle reassuring smile. Doctor Kim is young, seemingly only a few years older than you, with black hair pushed back against his forehead, and full, pink lips. He seems more like an older brother than a doctor with his warm smile.

“I’m okay, I guess…” you trail off, your hands flat against the bed as you try to push yourself up to a sitting position. Doctor Kim immediately goes over to your side, helping you sit up. “What happened?” you ask, as Doctor Kim sits down beside you.

“You got into a car accident, Y/N. You were in a coma for a year.” He tells you, as your brain tries to process everything in. “You remember your name, so you most likely didn’t lose your memory. Or is there anything you don’t remember?”

You try to think. You know your full name, and your birthday. You know your parents’ names. You know where you study, what you’re taking up, and even some of the professors you hate the most. You know your friends, and the name of your pet. 

You shake your head, and Doctor Kim smiles at you. “Great. Seeing as there’s nothing wrong with you, you’re free to go. Your parents are already filling out the forms so you’ll be out by tomorrow. If ever you suddenly realize that you’re missing a piece of your memory, don’t hesitate to contact us right away. Aside from that, you’ll also have weekly check-ups with me until I’m fully assured that you’re okay.”

You give him a nod and a small smile. “I understand. Thank you, Doctor.” He gives you a curt nod before slipping out of the room quietly. You let out a long tired sigh, despite just having woken up from a coma. You lean back on the bed, your mind racing with a million thoughts.

You didn’t tell him, but you were sure you were missing something. You didn’t know what, exactly, so you decided against telling him. What would you even tell him anyway? Your gut tells you something’s missing but you don’t know what it is? That wouldn’t make sense anyway.

“Y/N! You’re awake now!” A bright, cheery voice snaps you out of your thoughts, and your eyes land on a smiling, blonde haired boy.

“Chan,” the name falls off your lips with ease, your heart warming up at the sight of your best friend. He rushes over to your side, grabbing your hand to grasp it in his. The gentleness of his hand holding yours feels familiar and you feel yourself smiling. 

“I was so scared you lost your memory and forgot about me,” Chan sighs, his eyes looking downcast. You squeeze his hand gently. 

“How could I forget the only person who always drags me to work out at the gym with him against my own will?” you tease and he lets out a loud laugh.

“I won’t drag you along with me now. At least, not until you’ve fully recovered,” he winks and you give him a playful roll of your eyes as he smiles wistfully at you.

“What is it?” you ask, tilting your head as you study his expression.

He shakes his head, pursing his lips. “Nothing. I’m just glad you remember everything.”

Chan spends a few more hours with you before he has to leave, saying he still needs to work on a few more of his songs. He gives you one last hug before leaving you alone to your thoughts once more.

Everything feels weird. Everything about Chan still feels the same. He’s still your best friend, and there’s still that familiar warmth of his hand holding yours. His laugh still sounds the same. Nothing’s different, nothing feels unfamiliar.

But why does it feel like you can feel a warm hand holding yours long after Chan’s hand lets go of it? Why does it feel like you can hear someone else’s laughter ringing in the silence long after Chan’s laughter has died down?

The next day you find yourself back at home, missing the familiar, homey scent of your surroundings. This was definitely better than the bleach and betadine trademark scent of the hospital. Your parents leave you to collect your thoughts, giving you some time and space to yourself first. 

You climb up the stairs to your room, feeling drained from the car ride back home. You had a long day, and it was past five in the afternoon. The sky was dark already, since you were still early into January and still a few months away from blooming flowers and cherry blossoms falling. You climb under your covers, smiling at how familiar it all feels.

Still, something’s crawling at the back of your mind when you turn on your side. Your hand reaches out, feeling the sheets, hoping to find some sort of answer to the nagging question you’ve had since yesterday. 

What were you missing?

Sleep eventually consumes you and your eyes shut close, momentarily putting a halt on the nonstop thinking.

You missed dinner and it’s already 12:15 am when a strong breeze blows in through your room, pushing your windows open. The strong gust of wind hits your bare skin, and the coolness wakes you up with a shiver. Your eyes glance at the clock on your bedside and as the red numbers glare at you, your eyes widen.

You remember his doe-like eyes and his giggles full of mirth. You remember the little scar on his left cheek and his plush lips. You remember his soulful voice when he sang for you and how he holds you in his arms when you dance around in your room into the late night. You remember him taking his coat off to wrap you in it the first time you met. You remember him telling you you’ll get sick if you continued crying. You remember feeling his warmth surround you during your first meeting. You remember how he holds your hands in his, how he hugs you with so much care. You remember how he picked up the broken pieces of your shattered heart that night, putting it back together little by little, piece by piece over the days, weeks, and months that you got to know him. 

You remember how he snuck into your room that night, reminding you that it’s been one year since you met at that frozen lake that holds so much sentimental value for you. You remember telling him you love him, and how he tells you he feels the exact same way. You remember falling asleep in his arms that night, you remember his soft lips against your forehead kissing you good night.

You remember how he leaves you that same day, telling you to still be happy even without him. You remember kissing him for the first and last time. You remember clutching onto his embrace, hearing him say he loves you one last time before opening your eyes and finding no trace of him anywhere.

You remember every moment, every memory, every fleeting moment you had with him. You remember how he made you feel — every time he made you laugh, every time he made you feel loved. 

You remember him. You remember Jeon Jeongguk. 

Tears start streaming down your face as you grab your phone, searching his name through your contacts. But you find nothing. Your fingers type out his number instead, memorizing it by heart, but your call goes straight to voicemail. You don’t stop there, you pull up almost every social media account you have, hoping to find any trace of him in your friends or your following list. You remember taking a thousand pictures with him, posting them all the time.

But there’s nothing about him. Your breathing gets ragged as your fingers fumble through your phone, calling your best friend. Knowing him, he’s still awake at this hour.

“Y/N? Hey, why are you still-”

“Chan? Chan, where’s Jeongguk? Did he tell you where he’s going? He never told me but maybe you know where he is?” You cut him off, tears still streaming down your face as you stutter out your inquiries.

“Jeongguk? Y/N, where are you? Are you outside? I’m going to pick you up, tell me where you are.” Chan says worriedly, and you can hear him cursing lowly under his breath and the sounds of keys jingling in the background.

“No, I’m at home. Chan, where is he? Why did he go? Why did he leave me without telling me where he’s going?” You’re sobbing into the phone now and Chan’s door shuts behind him as he sighs.

“Y/N, I need you to stay there until I get to you, okay? Wait for me.” You shake your head but remember he can’t see you.

“Chan, just tell me where he is. Please.” You’re begging now and you can feel the heartbreak rising up your throat, making you feel suffocated. You can’t breathe properly, but the next words you hear knock the breath out of your lungs.

“He’s dead, Y/N. He died saving you.”

iv.

“You were crossing the street when he saw you. He immediately ran over to push you out of the way. Your head hit the pavement, but he couldn’t get out of the way in time to save himself. He died the moment you both made it to the hospital.” Chan tells you slowly, his car coming to a stop by the park. Tears were flowing silently down your cheeks.

“But I met him, Chan. I spent an entire year with him.” you try to insist, turning over to face Chan whose eyes are glossy with tears now. 

“You were in a coma, Y/N. You didn’t know each other before the accident either. How could you have possibly met him?” Chan sighs.

“Chan, I loved him for an entire year! Was he just a figment of my imagination then?” You cry louder, your heart breaking. Chan looks up in thought with a sad sigh, before turning to face you.

“Dead people have regrets. Jeongguk must have had his own regrets and didn’t want to leave just yet. Your wandering soul met his ghost that same night. But after spending a year loving you, he has to go. Maybe all he wanted was to make you happy. And now that he’s accomplished that, his time is up.” Chan explains and you close your eyes tightly, wishing for all of this to just be a huge nightmare.

But it isn’t.

“Can I get some fresh air for a bit?” You ask and Chan leans over the console to give you a hug. He opens the door from behind you and you give him a grateful smile before heading out. Your feet lead you to the very same spot again. 

And just like the last time you were here, the lake is frozen over. Everything feels like déjà vu again. You crouch down on your knees with a sad, long sigh, your tears slowing down as they fall past your cheeks and down your chin.

You’re going to have to be happy without me now, okay?

I can’t stay here with you, Y/N.

Even when I’m gone, I’ll always be here,

I’m never going to truly leave you behind, Y/N. But I need you to be happy even without me. Can you promise me that?

It’s going to be hard, but can you do it? For me?

I love you, always remember that.

His last words ring in your ears, your hands coming up to clutch your chest as you feel your heartbeat. The wind blows softly, your hair fluttering in the wind as you wait for the usual shiver to come.

But you don’t feel it. Instead, you feel a blanket of warmth envelop you and you stop crying.

It’s barely there, but you can feel it. You can feel him. 

“Jeongguk.” You whisper softly, your breath raspy from crying so much.

“I told you you’re going to get sick if you keep crying in this weather, angel. Why do you love crying in the winter?” His gentle voice rings in your ears and you bite on your lower lip to prevent yourself from crying again. 

“I miss you.” you answer simply, and a gentle breeze blows again as you feel a soft kiss on your hair.

“I miss you too. But please be happy, okay? Don’t blame yourself. I never regret saving you that night, not even once.” He says gently as you nod rapidly. “I’ll see you soon, I’m going to wait for you. I love you, I always have, I always will.” 

You’re scared he’s going to leave again like last time without hearing you say the words back, but his warmth still surrounds you. “I love you too.”

And as the words leave your lips and form into clouds of smoke into the cold, dark night, the warmth surrounding you slowly disappears, leaving you with the familiar, stinging, cold winter air. Jeongguk always calls you angel but you realize that after all this time, he was your angel. From the moment he saved you that night, to piecing your broken heart back together, up until his last ‘I love you’, he’s been your angel.

And he always will be.

#jungkook scenarios #btsboulangerie #btsghostie #btsghostiebingo #jungkook x reader #jungkook imagines #jungkook angst #jungkook fluff #bts scenarios #bts imagines #bts x reader #nise writes

[hansolmates]

jungkook; give me five more minutes (loving you) | m

summary; jungkook’s the banker, and he’s investing in your time

pairing; bf!jungkook x fem reader

genre/warnings; idol!au, tooth rotting fluff, established relationship, very (and i mean very) lazy clit stimulation, ust

w.c; 953

a/n; today’s prompt is established relationship! the first of many fics for @btsghostiewritersnet​ BGW Bingo Bash! not so subtly inspired by the jonas brothers 5 more minutes as my kink is long cuddly mornings in bed. please enjoy and if u like it pls consider giving it a share! 

“No. No no. No no nonono—” 

Between each rejection at your prospect of starting your day, kisses blessed the bare skin on your shoulder, each “no” balmed by his slightly chapped lips. You could feel the pout in his kisses, the rumble in his morning voice tangling with his childish request. 

“Hobi is going to come back and get the water gun if we’re not out.” 

“Five more minutes.” 

His fingers skirt to the space between your tank top and shorts, easily finding their destination to your panties. You don’t bother to swat him away, you feel like your body is melting into the duvet accompanied by your boyfriend’s chest pressing you further into the mattress. His head is tucked between your neck and collarbone, cuddling you with a force so snug you wonder if you’re dating a grown man or a koala. 

You hum appreciatively when your slick lets Jungkook find his rhythm. Jungkook’s smile burns into your shoulder, murmuring happily about how weak you are for a good morning touch. 

“Five more minutes to add into a lifetime of happiness,” he mumbles into your neck. 

“Sounds like something that needs to go into your album.” 

You don’t know when the tables turned. One day, Jungkook decided to be the banker in your relationship and constantly barter time like a currency. He ensures that it’s worth it, that five, ten, forty minutes adds to the time you’re spending with the love of your life. And surely, it isn’t a waste of time if you both are happy, right? 

It used to be you, the one who wanted more more more of him. Waiting for him to finish a livestream so he can call you on his private number, or re-watching cheesy interviews where Western hosts ask for the nth time, “who’s the ____ in the group?” 

Jungkook’s now the one matching Jimin head-to-head on lateness. He lingers too long in your apartment, standing outside your doorway like a kicked puppy, even though it’s him that needs to leave (three minutes). He urges you to stay up for one more episode of the anime you’re currently binging, even though your eyes are glazed over and you can’t speak more than three words at a time (twenty-four minutes). He acts like lovestruck highschoolers when ending a call despite being miles away—”You hang up first!” but someone says, “no, you!” (7 minutes). 

You let your body wind back, grinding up against Jungkook’s basketball shorts but he holds you steady, refusing to let you move. You do manage a brief brush at his hardness, and he sighs in your ear, rubbing contented circles to reach a high you’re sure is far from reach. 

“Alright, you horny bitches.” 

Hoseok does not have the watergun today, but instead holds a clean white t-shirt and a Ziploc-packed sandwich, Nutella staining the plastic. He looks disinterested at the two of you, covered by the fluffy duvet. 

Jungkook hides his face with your hair, huffing. He’s still thumbing you, content. “Five—” 

“Hell no. You had more than five,” Hoseok shoots his stare to you, “and then some. Let’s go, you gotta eat in the car.” 

The older one leaves, but keeps the door ajar. Without any reluctance, you untack Jungkook’s hand from your panties. You take care to hold his large hand in both of yours, sitting up and observing Jungkook’s petulance like a child being scolded. 

Maintaining eye contact, you lick his thumb and pointer, smirking at the way your slick coats the digits. You’re relishing in the way his pupils dilate with hunger, knowing it’s far too late in the morning for him to get a taste of his own. He swoops you into his arms, peppering kisses to your cheeks as he cradles you. 

“I love you. I love you loveyoulove—” 

You giggle, reaching for his cheeks with both your hands to squish the soft flesh. He looks  adorable like this, just his head peeking from the thick comforter, your palms moulding his sleepy, happy face. You did wish he could offer you more time. At least for today, the banker is officially bankrupt. 

Forcing him to pucker his lips, you press some chaste pecks to his lips. “I love you more,” but you push him off the bed, using great force as you manage to shove all that muscle into a standing position. 

“That’s a goddamn lie. I love you way more.” 

“No, I love you—Jungkook stop trying to fake-fight, you need to go!” 

“Two more minutes!” you throw a pillow at him. He takes one step back. You throw your Cooky plushie at his head, bouncing off his frizzy bird’s nest and into his hands. The pink bunny smirks tauntingly at his creator. “Now that’s just mean.” he pouts, placing the plush on the floor. “We didn’t even finish what we started—” 

He’s already making his way towards you, one knee on the bed until Jimin slides in, socks helping him gain momentum as he grabs Jungkook by the ankle, throwing him off balance. “Y’all are nasty,” Jimin shakes his head before looking at you, “not so much you. I like you. Kook though? Nastiest.” 

Jungkook’s not just late today. He’s Jimin-late today. 

There’s a mini-struggle, with you slamming the door in their faces while Jungkook is grumbling with an extra slice of bread in his mouth. The flat is finally empty and you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. At ease, you make your way back to Jungkook’s room. The window is cracked open, and you see him waving frantically at you, putting the “call” symbol to his ear as Jimin shoves him in the backseat. 

As always, he manages to steal a little time. 

#goldenclosetnet #btsghostiebingo #jungkook fic #jungkook smut #jungkook fanfic #jungkook fluff #jungkook drabble #bts fic #bts smut #bts fanfic #damn i love my bed #just as much as jungoo #i love ths couple!! ! !

[breadoffoxy]

Dense Ice

Summary: You’re at the rink waiting for Namjoon to finish practice, but two Players won’t let you study in peace.

Written for the BTS Ghosite Marathon. Prompt: AUs: Sports

Drabble: 19/30

Pairing: bookworm n. Reader x Hockey Players Jungkook & Jimin

Genre: humor, fluff

Warnings: language, shy Jungkook, flirtatious Jimin, dense Reader, Hockey pushing and fighting

Word Count: 466

“Hey.”

“Hey, Jungkook.” You don’t look up at the hockey player who skates up to the edge of the rink, turning a page in your text book and effectively dashing his confidence.

That doesn’t deter Jungkook though. “Um, so,” he clears his throat, “what are you doing after this?”

“Going to get milkshakes with Namjoon and study like I do every Wednesday.” Looking up from your book, you frown and squint your eyes in confusion. “Why?”

“No reason?” Jungkook shies away before shaking his head. No! He skated over here for a reason and goddammit he was going to finally do it! “Um, I was wondering though, if maybe, you’d want to errr…”

It doesn’t help that you’re staring at him expectantly, waiting for him to get on with it.

“Iwaswonderingifyouwantedtogograbsomecoffee?” Jungkook stares at you with wide eyes, feeling every neve of his set on a flustered fire.

“…what?”

God Fucking Dammit!! Jungkook wants the world to eat him up right now. “Um, would you, if you want to…get coffee with me?” Jungkook’s voice turns small and weak at the end and he winces.

“I can’t this week because of my exams,” at Jungkook’s heartbroken expression you quickly add on, “but if you want a group coffee study session, we could do that tomorrow morning?”

Jungkook doesn’t know if he wants shame to eat him up still or to jump in the air with joy. You are incredibly dense, so really any step is almost a step in the right direction. “Y-yeah, tomorrow morning sounds great.”

“Great.”

Your smile makes all of his embarrassment worth it Jungkook decides. “What are you studying, perhaps I can-“ THUMP “oof!”

“Hey, nerds.” Jimin runs his hand through his hair and leans against the edge of the rink after checking Jungkook into the ice.

You roll your eyes and quickly bring your textbook up to hide your face when Jimin winks at you flirtatiously.

Jimin opens his mouth to say more but is interrupted by Jungkook who pushes him as soon as he recovers. The two start roughhousing on the ice in front of you while you just sigh and turn the page of your book, doing your best to shut them out.

A loud whistle screeches from the other end of the ice. An angry looking Hoseok is glaring at the two slacking players and they quickly straighten up at the sound. Their expressions look almost horrified and they quickly dash over to their angry vice-captain.

“They aren’t bothering you too much are they?”

You lower your book to see Namjoon looking at you with a sheepish expression. “Nope, Jungook just wanted to invite me on a study date.”

The hockey captain skates away with a chuckle, feeling sorry for his teammates that fell for his completely dense friend.  

#btsghostiemarathon #btsghostiebingo #BTS fanfiction #jimin fanfiction #jungkook fanfiction #jimin x reader #jungkook x reader #bts humor #bts fluff #dense ice #my writing

[alilbihh]

tomorrow (forever) | jjk

pairing: jungkook x reader

summary: it's only after two of your best friends get married that you and jungkook realize maybe marriage isn't that bad of an idea at all.

words: 2.3k

genre: established relationship!au, fluff, jungkook is just! a fool in love!!

a/n: I just love him ok!!! wanna kiss his nose!!!! and i took way too long to actually finish smth for the bingo. sdjksdgkj. ty for reading

The thing is, you predicted this marriage not too long ago. Or maybe it wasn't long ago at all.

It's one thing to be there when Hoseok and Yoongi are stupidly, densely in love with each other, with exchanging looks and lingering touches and letting them cry on your shoulder because they were in love with their best friend and didn't know what that meant.

It's another thing entirely, though, to be nursing a glass of wine offered to you in a tray and a well dressed waiter, poking at the decidedly uncomfortable dress digging into your side, watching the couples dance and the group of middle aged uncles cheer and the unwilling children skirt around their mother's dresses as they urge them to say hello.

You think you're tired but the buzzing in your ears tells you you're not. Hoseok keeps going around showing off his ring finger and Yoongi keeps kissing his knuckles and Jimin won't stop crying from even before the vows were said and it's all very dramatic and emotional and you can't stop smiling.

Jungkook's probably off somewhere to both charm and gain the favor of unsuspecting grannies, and when you strain your eyes to look sure enough, an older woman with too many rings and kind eyes is leading your boyfriend to a table of fruit slices and punch, probably saying something like eat, eat, you're too skinny, even though he probably has more muscle than actual flesh. You've seen this situation before.

The granny in question is shoving an entire cornucopia in his hands and watching expectantly, and you think you can pinpoint the moment he spots you watching him, eyes lighting up and his smile widening and this little bounce in his step he does when he's excited and can't quite hold it all in. You're so fond you don't think you can hold it all in, either.

He's hurriedly setting down the fruits and bowing respectfully at the granny before rushing towards you, first a walk then a jog then too-long strides that isn't quite considered a run and make him look so ridiculous you can't help but laugh. He's laughing when he reaches you, too.

Jungkook gently takes a hold of your hand, and you set down your glass of wine so he can take hold of the other, swings them around lightly,

"Y/n, hello, hello," he says, grins, clears his throat so he can push down some of the fondness leaking through his tone before finding that he doesn't need to and saying, "Did I tell you how beautiful you look?"

(Which is-- a ridiculous thing to say, really, because-- he's the one who drove you two here, and the first thing he said when he saw you was a mumbled wow and he's complimented you, like, three more times since then, and it's-- a lot. You just love him a lot.)

You pretend to think, hum lowly and say, "Huh, I can't recall. Might want to say it again."

Jungkook grins, never stopped, gently pulls you up, up, mumbles against your forehead, "Well, let me be the first to tell you that you look stunning."

You adjust his tie slightly, brush off his tux, grin something goofy and lopsided. "You look quite dashing yourself, mister Jeon. Very smart."

His hair is a bit disheveled, not quite as put together as it was when he first arrived, and when you squint you think there's a weird stain on his dark suit that's barely visible but still very much there that you're sure he, himself, has no idea of its origins. His eyes are a little wild and he's probably a bit tipsy. He's the prettiest man you've ever seen.

"Hmm," Jungkook hums something teasing, grins teasingly, too, "Will I look more smart if I start doing math problems here and now? Will it arouse you?"

You slap lightly at his chest as he laughs, "Shut up, nerd," you say but it doesn't come out nearly as menacing as you wanted it to. "Did you drink already?"

"Duh. Everyone did." As if on cue, Seokjin waltzes by in all his pink suited glory, hugging a wine bottle to his chest and whining to a nearby uncle about the extreme lack of kitchen utensils in the establishment. Someone should probably go control him.

"Where's Namjoon at a time like this?" You say, seconds before your eyes widen and you continue with a low, "Don't tell me he's drunk? Oh no. Drunk Namjoon is not a good Namjoon."

Jungkook winces, too, probably also recalling that one time Namjoon got drunk, barfed his guts out on a nearby tree, then started aggressively speaking spanish to it, in that order. You didn't know Namjoon knew spanish. Namjoon didn't know he knew spanish.

"It's.. not a good time." Is all Jungkook says.

You're both still standing in a corner by the bar, wrapped up and spewing nonsense to each other, and you think there's something you could say here, something to fill the silence, but this is nice, too. Like there's no need to fill it at all.

He's just started swaying you both to the music completely out of rhythm, something a bit slower than the upbeat song probably chosen by Hoseok, when the song abruptly cuts off, Taehyung tap, tap, tapping at the mic, someone that you think is the dj distantly yelling complaints.

"Alright, time for our dear friend Yoongi to throw the bouquet! Whoever's interested can line up, come, come, come!"

When you look over Jungkook's shoulder you see a very blushy, very displeased Yoongi and a very delighted Hoseok nudging him forward, the shorter man clutching at the blue and white flowers in his hands. Seokjin is cackling hysterically.

"Y/n-ah!" Jungkook gasps, swinging your arms around like a madman, "I wanna catch the bouquet!"

You snort, because of course he does, "Isn't that a lady thing?"

He scoffs, "That's dumb. Since when do I adhere to social norms." He's bouncing in place again, glancing from you to the dance floor and back, where a small group of women have gathered. You laugh.

"Go, go, I'll watch from here," You say and he sprints, and you watch with a laugh because--really, he stands out like a sore thumb, the tallest of them all, a black tux amidst a sea of colorful dresses. Yoongi's standing on a small podium, his back facing them all, preparing to throw the bouquet, and you think you can see everyone holding their breath in anticipation.

The whole situation is so immensely endearing, a small congregation of women with their hands already in the air, Jungkook doing little hops despite being able to easily see over all their heads.

You're so wrapped up in your thoughts, with the idea of what you'll do when Jungkook comes back all pouty and empty handed, that you don't really process when it happens; Jungkook springing into the air, clutching the bouquet to his chest like a lifeline.

He turns, grins victoriously, waving his newly acquired bouquet in the air, says something along the lines of look, look, Y/n-ah, look, I caught it, I caught the bouquet, but your brain just kind of-- short circuits.

Like yes, maybe it's just a bouquet, just a silly tradition for people to think they're meant to get married next, but that's exactly it. Jungkook caught the bouquet. That means he's meant to get married next.

By the time Jungkook reaches you, the thought marriage marriage marriage has kind of already wrapped itself around your head, echoing mercilessly. What if this were your wedding? Would you cry during your vows, like Jungkook most definitely will? What if you two were the ones to decorate the venue, to argue over its color scheme, to taste test wedding cakes until Jungkook tastes sweet sweet sweet. If every time you held hands you'd feel the smooth line of a ring, if you could look down at your ring finger and remember how much you love, love, love.

Jungkook's still looking at you expectantly when you come to.

"Um." You blink. "Congrats."

"See? I told you I could do it." He runs a finger over the petals, brows furrowed, mumbles a low what kind of flower is this, inspecting them seriously, completely unaware of your inner turmoil. And you feel kind of-- overwhelmed, maybe, of this boy, this beautiful boy, and wonder if maybe he feels the same way, maybe he'll want to spend forever with you, too.

Jungkook's still talking when you snap out of it, "...And then I was like, I'm gonna do it, and then hyung was like, don't do it, and then I was like, why can't I do it, and then he said something about it not being a good idea? I was honestly shocked. When do I not have good ideas."

"Preposterous." You say, just to have something to say.

"Absolutely preposterous." He nod nod nods, and you wonder when you both started swaying, the song already something softer and slower.

"I'm gonna," you breathe, "Gonna get a drink, I think."

"Oh! Me too, me too. Let's go," He takes a hold of your hand, which is-- devastating, really. Here you are, trying to escape the thought of marrying your boyfriend with your boyfriend following you. Devastating.

You trail behind as he leads you back to the bar, keeps holding your hand while he orders for you both, tilts his head and says whaddya want, baby? And it's, just. Devastating.

You feel a bit like how you did in your first date, just toeing over the line between friends and lovers, wondering what to do next. Feel a bit lost but not quite, feel comfortable where you are, but at the same time kind of want to be introduced as Jungkook's spouse. And kiss Jungkook's ring. And--

"Hey," Jungkook breathes into your ear, laughs when you jump, "What're you thinking so intently about?"

"About how to get you to never do that again." You stick your tongue out at him. He does the same.

"C'mon, c'mon, tell me," he says, giggling sporadically, shuffles his chair closer to yours. He looks like he wants to keep going but his eyes widen suddenly, something like the beginning of a bad idea in the glint in his eyes, "Hey, hey, I just had an idea."

"Yeah?" You grin, wave the bartender over when you see him with your drinks.

Except when he's about to set your drink down, Jungkook leans in close and--"Let's elope," and you, one: flail your arms, two: choke a little, and three: knock over your drink.

Jungkook's too busy laughing to both acknowledge and explain himself, so you're left to profusely apologize to the very confused bartender and aggressively wipe napkins over the counter. It's a mess.

"Jungkook!" You hiss once the bartender goes away, "You can't just-- why!"

"Because it's fun," he giggles, cheeks tinted rosy gold.

"What just happened?" A voice says suddenly overhead, and when you turn you see an equally confused Hoseok rightfully worried over what's going on at his wedding. This is probably the first time you've seen him away from Yoongi the whole night.

"Y/n just spilled her drink." Jungkook tattles immediately.

"I did not-"

"It just flew everywhere, all over the place. There was an avalanche of it. People were swimming in it, slipping in it, they're considering calling for a nationwide rationing of wine just to make up for—"

"Shut up, I hate you," he grins, and what you say is rendered ineffective when you let your boyfriend pull you close to kiss your temple.

Boyfriend. Because—you're not married. But maybe that's not the worst thing in the world, suddenly.

It's a few hours later, the venue growing more spacious, more empty, when you bring it up again-- Jungkook already beside you, tracing a nonsensical pattern over the back of your hand. You don't think he realizes what he's doing. The thought makes you so endlessly fond.

"Guk?" You mumble. He hums in question, head tilting to give you his full attention.

"Wha'sit, baby?" He drawls.

You breathe. There's some confetti stuck to his hair, and you laugh softly before plucking it out. He just grins and lets you, ducks his head before watching you through his lashes. You run a hand through his hair, then, the gel already having disintegrated into his skull or whatnot, fringe sticking to his forehead. He closes his eyes. Looks so pretty you might just burst.

You let in a breath. Let it out. Count to three. Say-- "That's where we're headed, right?"

It takes a second, then two. Jungkook opens his mouth, as if to say something, closes it. Looks around, and you think you can pinpoint when he realizes you're not talking about home, at least not in the literal sense.

He cracks a smile, lets out the softest laugh. "Oh, baby," he coos, kisses your knuckles once, twice, thrice, lets out the goofiest grin. "Of course, Y/n-ah, my baby. We're in this together, hm?"

(There's hints, later, too-- sometimes he'll be eating cereal and randomly say maybe yellow would be nice for our wedding, sometimes you'll walk past jewelry stores and he'll give you this soft little nudge of presence. Sometimes he'll stare a few seconds too long at your empty ring finger.

You wonder, wonder when he started saying when, when we get married, not if. Wonder when he started being so sure of it, this fiercely sure thing. Wonder when you started agreeing without much thought.

You're not engaged, not quite yet, but your heart kind of-- swells, when you think about it, that one day you will be, maybe not too far from now.

Tomorrow, though-- tomorrow. Right now, you're content as it is. You can figure out forever tomorrow.)

#btsghostie #btsghostiebingo #bts #bts jungkook #jungkook x reader #bts fanfiction #bts scenarios #bts imagines #bts fluff #jungkook imagines #jungkook scenarios #jungkook fluff #jungkook fanfic

[joopiterjoon]

Crutches and Crushes

Pairing: Seokjin x Reader

Genre: PG, Hospital!au, Fluff

Warnings/Tags: Chaotic-Wingman!Taehyung, Doctor!Jin, swearing, broken bones, meetcute

Wordcount: 2k

Read on Ao3

#jin x reader #seokjin fluff #hyunglinenetwork #thekimlinenet #ficswithluv #bangtanhq #btsghostiebingo #seokjin #jin #bts fluff #bts fic #seokjin drabble #jin drabble #bts drabble #seokjin x reader

[vantaenims]

anemoia | jungkook

pairing: jungkook x reader

genre: futuristic au | fluff, mystery

word count: 11.7k

warning/s: mentions of death and a bit of a make out session (oh my).

summary: It’s a well known fact that a person only dreams about people they’ve already seen in their life but how come you’re dreaming about someone you’ve never seen before, someone who is probably a person your subconscious created, and someone that continues to only exist in your dreams.

Part of BTSGhostieBingo (futuristic!au prompt)

masterlist

all rights reserved © vantaenims - do not repost, translate, or claim as your own.

--

According to a study, as much as 95% of all dreams are quickly forgotten shortly after waking.

Reverie is a helpful device where you can securely store your dreams and archive them by syncing the device through the Reverie Application. With other built-in features, you can now customize how your dream works by choosing your desired location and inputting any character you want to appear in your dream.

With Reverie, you can build your own dreams.

You slid the switch to turn on the device and a blinking blue light is now visible on it’s side though it was only for a moment as you successfully paired the device with your phone and the application. 

As usual, you registered for an account and input the required necessary information but what piqued your interest the most are the so called built-in features like the location where you can choose from various choices like beach, urban city, garden, festivals, etc. and lastly, the characters, wherein you should input a picture of a person that you like to appear in your dream.

This is the reason why you’re so keen in purchasing Reverie because it’ll be the only way you can actually see your late mother in limitless ways. You barely remember your memories with her since she passed away from Ovarian Cancer when you were only four - an age where memories can be pretty hazy.

You can only remember her through pictures and stories your father has told you so it’ll be a joy to at least watch your dreams with her in it or perhaps watch the memories you’ve invented.

Spreading the covers, you soon get in your bed as you ready yourself to sleep, clicking the Reverie app to choose your location in a garden and clicking the picture of your mother you uploaded a while ago as your character.

You placed your phone on your nightstand as soon as you finalized your dream customization, putting the Reverie device on your temple while you managed to lay down on your bed, tapping the circle device as you close your eyes until you can finally sleep and dream.

All you could see are stars in the wide vast dark sky, they’re so clear and bright since there are no clouds to cover them for tonight but you could definitely feel most the cold wind of the night enveloping you though you could feel the warmth of the person next to you - your mom.

“How are you, my dear?” you turn your head to the side to see your mom plucking some leaves around the stem of a red rose, “You’ve grown to be such a beautiful lady.”

You were suddenly hit with a surge of overwhelming emotions, thinking how the moment feels so vivid and real like it’s really taking place right now though you’re fully aware that this is only projection of your subconscious.

“You look perfect just like what dad told me” you smiled as you got the red rose from your mother’s hand, twirling it to examine it’s petals.

“How old are you now?”

“I’m turning 23 this year” you held your mother’s hand that was right by your side, squeezing it as you moved closer to rest your head on her shoulder, both laying down in the middle of the garden to stargaze.

“Ten years from now you’re gonna be the same age as me”

“Aren’t you like 52 now just like dad?” you peered up at your mom but then surprisingly, she looks too young to be in her early fifties.

“The dead doesn’t age, dear” your mom chuckled as she kissed your forehead whilst she pointed her fingers towards the sky, “We’re all up there amongst the stars where i constantly watch you from above”

“Heaven does exist?” you said like a curious child.

“I suppose so but you see that little twinkling star right there?” you nodded as you listened attentively to what more she could say, “I’m always right there.”

“Can i look at that star whenever i feel lonely?” 

Your mom warmly smiled, grabbing the rose from you as she broke the stem to make it shorter, placing it right behind your ear whilst she thread her fingers soothingly along your hair to fix it.

“You can and not just when you’re lonely but whenever you feel happy or whatever it is you feel. I’ll always be here for you, my dear.”

You woke up not too long after your mother had said that which instantly made you feel better though you felt like the dream’s too short and only happened in a span of five minutes but then time seems to be irrelevant when you’re dreaming since it’s clearly morning now and it has been seven hours since you slept.

So far, you could say that the Reverie delivered and met your expectations. The dream was lucid and felt so realistic which happens to be true to what the device promised though they have warned that the flow will not be consistently like that as it’s in the nature of our dreams to be purely irrational and weird which something the company is trying to eliminate by continuous extensive research.

You start your day ahead with a wide smile on your face, feeling exquisitely happy that you got the chance to spend time with your mother even though it’s just a dream but if it’s the only way you could get to be with your mother then that’s what matters.

--

You rung the doorbell of the veterinary clinic which is the place you’re working for as a receptionist - a job you took since you’ve gotten practically bored being unproductive halfway into your gap year so might as well apply for a job that doesn’t require much work plus you figured that it’d be fun since you’ll get to be around lovely dogs and cats all day long.

“You’re early” you smiled back at Hoseok who happens to be the veterinary doctor and the owner of the clinic, so practically he’s your boss though he’s rather much of a friend to you given how he’s just a few years older from you.

“Good morning”, you said, “Is Jimin still not here?”

Jimin is also a veterinary doctor much like Hoseok but he’s acting more of an assistant doctor in this clinic.

“He bought some pastries down the bakery” you nodded as you settled yourself inside your booth, opening the computer to check the appointments scheduled for today in the spreadsheet until you noticed Mickey - Hoseok’s Shih Tzu dog - sitting on the floor right beside your feet, staring up at you.

“Hello, Mickey”, you spoke in a little voice as you picked him up and placed him in your lap to pet him, noticing how he’s wearing a new striped shirt, “You have new clothes, hm?”

The chimes attached to the door rang as you see Jimin entering the clinic whilst he rummages around the paper bag he’s holding until he holds out what seems to be like cheese bread to you.

“I got this for you,” Jimin said as he placed the cheese bread and iced coffee on your desk, “And for you” also giving the same thing to Hoseok.

“Thank you Jimin but you don’t have to” 

“Eat up besides all the pastries in the bakery today are buy two, get one” Jimin sweetly smiled at you, leaning one of his elbows on top of your desk as he took a bite off the cheese bread. 

“What’s the schedule for today?” Hoseok asked as he joined Jimin, also leaning against your desk.

“Ms. Nam Chung Hee scheduled an annual booster shot for her two dogs at 2 p.m.” you said as you read out through your computer.

“Does she already have a record here?” 

“Yeah, I checked yesterday” you spun your chair to rack through the filing cabinet, taking out the folder with the client’s name on it as you handed it to Hoseok. 

You set down Mickey on the floor as you stood up to grab the remote of the television from your desk, turning it on and setting the channel to National Geographic for the guests to watch in the waiting area.

With nothing else to do, you sat behind the reception desk as you took out your phone to go to the Reverie app, thinking it’d be best to kill time whilst you watch your dream from last night. You plugged in your earphones to your phone, putting only one piece of it to your right ear just so you could still be aware of your surroundings.

Clicking on the video dated yesterday, you instantly saw the familiar starry night sky though you could already tell that the video quality is bad but not bad enough that you can’t make it out - it’s more of like a 144p video, it’s not like you could complain though as Reverie is said to be still up for improvement.

Despite how blurry it is, you smiled as soon as your mother’s face appeared on your screen, listening back to your conversation on how she’s the little twinkling star on the sky but then you were disrupted when you heard the door chimes, causing you to remove your earphones and placing your phone back to the desk.

“Hi, i scheduled yesterday a booster shot for my dogs”

“Ah yes, you must be Ms. Nam?” you asked as she nodded her head to confirm, thinking that she’s a few hours early from an appointment but it’s not like a problem at all considering you don’t have any clients or customers yet to attend to.

“Can I have your dog’s vaccination cards please?”

You prompted her to sit in the waiting area for a while as you wrote down the information on your records that you have detached from the folder to put it in a clipboard along with the vaccination cards, reading out the name of the two Maltese dogs - Blossom and Bubbles.

“Here are their records, I'll be calling Hoseok” you handed the clipboard towards Jimin who just got out of the bathroom right in time as you were about to call him and Hoseok.

“Dr. Park will assist you for a while” you said before you disappeared to go to Hoseok’s office, knocking your knuckles against the door before you peered your head inside to inform Hoseok that Ms. Nam had arrived for her appointment.

“Oh it’s the Powerpuff dogs, Blossom and Bubbles” Hoseok exclaimed as he read out their names in the record that Jimin handed to him, petting the dogs who are now placed in the metal table.

“Y/N, can I have one of those record sheets? There are only two lines left for me to write in here” you looked back to see that Jimin had followed you on your way back towards your desk.

“Is there a Buttercup?” you asked as you handed Jimin a blank record sheet. Jimin was confused for a moment until he catched on to what you are referring to.

“Ah no, she said she’ll save that name for when she gets another dog” Jimin smiled and raised his eyebrows at you before he went back to the room to assist Hoseok.

You sat down as you put back the folders of records you got out from the filing cabinet, unaware that you started to subconsciously hum to the song Build Me Up Buttercup by The Foundations.

--

You sat on one of the benches under the waiting shed, taking out your phone to watch again the clip of your dream but before you could even unlock your phone, the sound of the bus doors opening caught your attention. Coincidentally, it happened to be your bus hence you stood up to enter inside, choosing the seat at the far right end, continuing the video once you’ve sat yourself comfortably.

As you got yourself comfortable, you then started to watch your dream and you think you don’t mind replaying it all day long, still finding the whole thing impressive. You can’t help but feel excited for the memories and moments  you’ll build in the future with your mother, not minding a bit that it’ll be artificial.

Surprisingly, you arrived at the bus stop near your home earlier than usual, thinking that you must’ve avoided the rush hour since Hoseok decided to close the clinic twenty minutes early from it’s closing time since there are not much clients after Ms. Nam’s appointments, just the usual customers who are buying pet foods are coming to the clinic.

You managed to stop by a convenience store first to buy two pints of salted caramel ice cream for you and your dad whom you’re still living with since you promised to him that you’ll not be moving out anytime soon unless you get married that is. You were an only child so ever since your mom died, it was only you and your dad.

“Dad, I’m home” you left your shoes at the door mat, slipping on to your slippers as you directly went to the dining room upon whiffing something savory once you entered the door.

“Oh you’re right in time, i just finished preparing the smoked salmon” your dad said, placing the plates on the table. 

“It looks delicious”, you eyed the salmon which is plated and designed elegantly, making it such a fine piece of meal with the presentation alone, “and it tastes one too.”

Your dad works as an executive chef for a five star hotel in Seoul which makes you lucky since you got to taste their premium menu specialties and other delicacies for free once in a while, like tonight since he took a day off.

“Eat as much as you want, I've prepared enough. In fact, why don’t you bring some at work tomorrow and also give it to those two doctors…” your dad looked as if he’s trying hard to recall the name of your co-workers.

“Jimin and Hoseok” you laughed as you reminded him.

“Give it to Jimin and Hoseok, i’ll put it in a microwavable container so that you could heat it up”

You warmly smiled at your dad at how caring he is, placing your hand on top of your dad’s on the table, squeezing it with yours, “Thanks, Dad.”

“You know, i just remember that i’ve never seen them yet” your dad said, “They must be good looking huh? I mean a doctor ain’t a bad choice is it?”

You stopped chewing as you playfully glared at your dad, knowing where this conversation is heading. 

“Dad, it’s inappropriate if i go beyond our professional relationship” you shook your head, thinking how you dad has countlessly pestered you about getting a boyfriend since he thought that your life is pretty lonely for a 22 year old girl who chose to spent most of her time with his dad whom he’s still living with which you’re pretty content with but your dad must’ve thought the other way around.

“I just want you to be happy, that’s all” 

“Being single doesn’t equate to being lonely” you clarified, “Anyway, I am happy so don’t worry about that plus I’ll eventually find someone.”

“Well, you’re not getting any younger and it’s probably what your mom wants for you too” your dad shrugged, looking at you and then to your plate where your asparagus seems to be untouched.

“Aren’t you going to eat that?”

“You know that i don’t eat asparagus, dad” 

“It’s glazed in honey though, try it you might like it”

You picked up your fork to try the honey glazed asparagus but it still tastes wrong to you and your dad must’ve noticed when he saw you scrunch your nose in disgust, shaking your head in disapproval.

“You’re like a little child” your dad sighed as he transferred the asparagus into his plate to eat it.

Majority of your dinner was spent with your dad asking you loads of questions about Jimin and Hoseok, defending himself that he just wants to know the boys that are working with his precious girl. Defeatedly, you have no choice but to answer his questions as you both eat over the pint of ice cream you’ve bought.

After you’ve washed the dishes, you wished your dad good night even though it’s still pretty early for bedtime, heading straight away to your room to wash up and ready yourself for bed. It’s funny how you’ve never been this excited to sleep except the times when you’re sleep deprived.

As you plopped on your bed, you then grabbed your device from your nightstand to turn it on as you plug in your phone to your charger, opening the Reverie app to pair it with your phone but then a tab suddenly appeared as it got paired.

Would you like to continue your dream?

Confused, you got the manual inside your drawer to find out that you could continue your previous dream for two times only as the brain could only take so much. You declined the option to continue since you want to try first the other locations. 

Train Station is what you choose since you plan to travel around Seoul with your mom. As soon as you got to choose the location and character, you placed the device on your temple as you try to sleep.

You soon found yourself in front of the ticket vending machine, getting the cards from the machine’s dispenser.

“Let’s go” your mom said as she got on the escalator, prompting you to hurriedly catch up with her, “Hurry, the train’s about to leave.”

You run up the escalator, excusing yourself as you try to catch up with your mom who’s already standing on the platform but then the train doors had closed already as soon as you step foot onto the platform.

“It’s okay, let’s just sit and wait for the next one”, your mom said as she sat down on the bench, tapping the seat next to hers for you to sit.

“Where should we go?” you asked but you were rather met with silence.  Looking to your right, you noticed that she’s no longer sitting beside you. Furrowing your brows, your scan around the platform as you search for your mom but it’s as if she just suddenly disappeared into thin air.

The clinking sound of coins hitting against the ground has caught your attention, turning your head to the side to see an old man bending down to pick up his coins whilst one of his coins managed to roll towards your direction, only stopping as it bumped the side of your shoes.

You picked it up as you went over to the old man to give it until he smiled at you, stopping your hand that’s about to give him his coin.

“Keep the change” he chuckled as he rode the elevator, leaving you there with his ₩100 coin.

Shrugging, you then played with the coin in your hand, tossing it just to catch it mid-air to slam it at the back of your hand. You then removed your hand to reveal that it landed on tails.

You grasped the coin in your hand as you watch the train pick up its speed by the second, setting aside your hair that has made its way to your face from the gush of wind until the rumbling sounds of the train completely faded out in the distance making the station a quiet and calm place once again.

Once again, you heard the clinking sound of the coin hitting the ground, realizing that it fell off your hand at the sight of a boy at the other side of the platform who seemed to be staring straight at you. You looked at your sides to see if you were mistaken but it looks like you’re the only one standing on your side of the platform much like him.

But then he broke eye contact as he walked towards the stairs of the station, causing you to rush towards the stairs so that you’ll be able to catch him before he’s out of your sight. Thankfully, you managed to grab his arm before he could pass through the turnstile. You felt him tense a bit as you touched him, turning around to look at you with a surprised look on his face that instantly turned into confusion once you spoke.

“Jungkook” you whispered.

Suddenly, an odd blaring sound blasted throughout the station, jolting you up from reality that the sound you happened to hear came from your phone. You extend your hand towards the nightstand to grab it, snoozing the alarm.

Sitting up, you open your bleary eyes as you remove the device from your temple, staring at it for the weird dream you’ve just encountered but dreams are supposed to be weird isn’t it? But how come everyone’s faces are blurry except for your mother and that boy - Jungkook - whom you followed after.

It’s not like you’ve ever seen that face or know anyone whose name is Jungkook but you shrugged the idea off, remembering the warning in the manual that dreams don’t consistently flow smoothly since it’s in the dreams nature to be purely irrational and weird though you can’t help but wonder about the boy that suddenly appeared out of nowhere.

Who is Jungkook?

--

You found yourself sitting in the waiting lounge, watching some sort of a Moose Documentary in National Geographic Channel. The battery from the remote control ran out so it’s not like you have any choice but to watch whatever’s playing but it’s not like it’s bad at all, you just happen to learn that Mooses can dive up to six meters or twenty feet and they can hold their breath for a minute!

The door chimes rung, making you dart your attention towards the door. A young boy who looks to be thirteen came in with a Beagle Pup on his arms, stopping in front of your desk with quite a lost look upon noticing that the reception is empty with quite a worried look on his face. 

“Hi, how can i help you?” you stood up, instantly going behind your desk to assist the young boy.

“I think he’s not feeling well” the boy lightly cradles and bounces the puppy like a parent trying to calm a baby.

“Well, can you explain to me what’s wrong?”

“He’s been constantly vomiting since this morning and i think he’s getting weaker by the second” 

“Let me just call the doctor” you said, standing up to go directly to Hoseok’s office to inform him and Jimin who’s also in the room that there’s an emergency waiting for them outside.

“Do you have a record in here yet?” you asked the boy as you got behind your desk to ready the clipboard for Jimin.

“Uh I don’t know he’s actually my sister’s dog”

“Okay, what’s her name then?” you smiled, noticing how he’s panicking a bit but he sighed in relief once he saw her sister come through inside the clinic, helping her brother to give out the necessary details. 

Jimin then assisted them to go inside the room for the check up whilst you followed them to give Jimin his clipboard, giving you a chance to witness Hoseok question the siblings when the symptoms appeared while he assessed the dog’s condition. making you leave the room to go back to your desk now that your task is done.

You went back behind your desk, continuing to watch the documentary whilst you eat some sliced apples that your dad prepared for you, saying that you should start eating healthy foods rather than fast food you’ve always been eating. 

“What happened?” you asked just as Jimin got out of the room.

“The dog’s dehydrated and he needs to be put in a drip so he’ll be confined here for a while until he gets better”, Jimin explained as he placed the clipboard on top of your desk and then grabbed the fork to eat one of your sliced apples.

Soon after, the girl got out of the room as he handed you a piece of paper that happens to be a prescription and also the list of supplies needed for the dog’s in confinement that was written by Hoseok.

“Are you getting all this?” you peered up towards her just before you could write it in an official receipt to which she confirmed by nodding.

“Should i bring his dog food here?” The man asked you but Jimin beat you to it to answer him.

“Yeah, you can but you could also just buy some here, you know to save you some legwork” Jimin smiled as you purse your lips from smiling further at Jimin’s tactic of encouraging customers to buy your products.

“Sure, could you add the dog food too” she said to you, nodding as you wrote down the additional item before you ripped the receipt to give it to her and also the calling card, informing her that she could call anytime for updates about her dog.

The siblings soon leave after they’ve watched Bruno - the name of the Beagle - put on a drip with Hoseok assuring them that he’ll be treated with proper care. You then volunteered to be the one to bring the beagle his food, saying how it’s the least thing you could do to help Hoseok and Jimin.

You came into the room where the beagle is supposedly being confined inside a cage that’s large enough for him to fit as you carry the bowl filled with dog food.

“Here you go” you said once you opened the cage and placed the bowl in front of Bruno who appears to be lethargic as he did not make any move to eat the food, only looking up at you with it’s such big adorable puppy eyes.

“You’ll be better soon” you gently petted the base of his neck.

Before you could stand up and leave, you picked up the card that’s placed atop of the cage as you wrote down the time on the card which is meant for monitoring his food intake and other medications.

“I’ll get going” you said to Jimin while you grab your belongings behind your desk.

“Alright, be safe and tell your dad we enjoyed his smoked salmon”

“Sure thing” you waved as you exited the clinic, making your way down to the bus stop to finally go home.

—

Would you like to continue your dream?

You were instantly reminded of your bizzare dream last night about that boy named Jungkook who you don’t even know and also clueless as to why you followed and chased him down.

Nonetheless, you tapped the ‘No’ option since you planned a while ago that you want to have some kind of a nice dinner setting in a restaurant with both of your parents present since you’ve been wanting to have a clear memory of having your family complete. 

Laying down, you did the routine of setting up Reverie and next thing you know, you’re in one of those fancy restaurants located on the rooftop where the view of the towering skyscrapers of Seoul mixed in with the city lights. It took you awhile to register that you’re inside the five star hotel where your dad is working at. 

“What must be your dad cooking for us hm?” 

Sitting in front of you is none other than your mom who seems to be fashionably dressed well in a straight black dress paired with a dainty pearl necklace and earrings, hair perfectly styled that stops right just at her shoulders.

“Probably something delicious” 

“Isn’t it nice we get to eat here? Who knew that your dad’s perks could come in handy” your mom chuckled as she looked around the expansive room that you guessed to be one of the private rooms since you’re the only ones inside.

You looked around to examine that the two sides of the room are glass walled while it’s also well lit thanks to the big elegant chandelier hanging in the middle of the room but most of all, it’s perfectly beautiful because of the night sky view from up here.

Suddenly, the door to your right opened as a waiter who’s holding a tray came inside to place the plate filled with smoked salmon paired with honey glazed asparagus in front of you, speaking to say that it’s the main dish for tonight.

“How are you two doing?” your dad said, following suit to enter the room.

“I thought you’ll be joining us” you said once you noticed that your dad’s still wearing his uniform.

“It’s a pretty busy night, I'll try to catch up later” your dad said, “besides why don’t you first enjoy your time with Jungkook here?”

You took a glance in front of you to see that your mother has now been replaced with Jungkook whose exchanging a few words with your father as if they’ve known each other for a very long time, making you confused to decipher how your dream got weird again but mostly surprised to see Jungkook appear.

“I’ll leave you two for now, okay?” your dad left you a kiss on top of your head whilst he patted Jungkook’s back as he exited the door to go back to the kitchen thus leaving you two alone.

“I remember how you always boast about your father’s cooking skills and I must say, you’re not exaggerating even a bit” 

“See, I told you so” you said even though you’re partly confused because the you in your dreams always manages to act dominantly.

“Would you like some wine?” you peered up at the source to see that a waiter’s waiting for your confirmation before he poured some wine on both of your glasses when you sent him a nod.

“Let’s make a toast” Jungkook said as he raised his glass at you but then you were confused to say the least.

“For what? It’s not our anniversary, right?” you asked, suddenly growing anxious that you might’ve forgotten that today’s supposed to be special but you do know that your anniversary as a couple is months away.

“How could you forget this?” Jungkook asked, chuckling as he widened his eyes at you in disbelief, “It has been a year since the day we met!”

“Has it been a year already?” 

Jungkook hummed as he transferred your untouched asparagus into his plate once he devoured all of his portion but then he glanced up at you to see just as he’s about to eat a piece of your asparagus.

“What? You don’t like asparagus” Jungkook said in an unfazed manner, happily munching on his food as he hummed in delight until he remembered the untouched glass of wine.  He wiped his mouth hurriedly with the napkin to grab the wine glass.

“Cheers?” Jungkook said with his mouth still full, smiling as he placed his hand atop of yours, thumb lightly grazing against your skin.

“Cheers”

--

Adjusting yourself on your seat, you propped your elbow against the desk as you leaned your head over your hand, watching the dream from last night wherein your mom magically disappeared out of nowhere and was instead replaced with Jungkook who you assume is your ‘boyfriend’ in your dream.

You’re still unaware as to why he appeared in your dream for the second time again that’s why it prompted you to search on the internet if Reverie users have experienced the same thing as you but there was none so far.

But you know for sure that dreams are heavily influenced on what happened to you in real life thus the reason you were eating the smoked salmon dish with asparagus because of that dinner you had with your dad one day ago and also the reason why he’s your boyfriend because of that talk with your dad.

Sighing, you stand up as you leave your desk to sit beside Jimin who’s watching a movie in the waiting area.

“Do you want some?” Jimin stretched his hand that’s holding a pack of peanuts. You held out your palm to him as he poured over some nuts until it’s enough for your liking.

“Thanks” you said as you popped them into your mouth, “Jimin…”

“Hmm?” you were a bit hesitant if you should talk to Jimin about Reverie since it gained a bad image with one news outlet saying that the device’s original purpose got taken out of its context and was instead converted into something controversial - it was now being used by others to satisfy their sexual fantasies.

“What do you think about Reverie?” you shyly said.

“The dreaming device?” Jimin asked, “I don’t know much about it except that everyone uses it to dream about wild things, why?”

Well, it looks like that article broke out the internet already and it made you even more bashful to open up to Jimin that you’ve purchased the device yourself even though you know that you’re using it for another reason.

“I, um, bought it” 

Jimin peered his eyes away from the television as he looked at you with his eyebrows raised, momentarily stopping himself from munching down the peanuts.

“I mean i have it since you know, my mom died a long time ago and it’s the only way i could only see her” you defended yourself, feeling a bit embarrassed from how you talked so fast.

“Well, I thought you bought it for another reason” Jimin chuckled, “How is it?”

“It’s good, i get to see my mom anytime i want but then it started getting weird recently” you purse your lips as you contemplate if it’ll be a good idea to tell him the boy in your dream - Jungkook. 

“Go on”, Jimin said, urging you to continue.

“I was dreaming about my mom but then a boy would constantly take her place but what’s weird is that i called him ‘Jungkook’ and i don’t even know anyone who has that name”

“What does he look like then?”

“Well, he has big doe eyes, sharp nose, nice smile and i must admit, he looks quite handsome and cute at the same time” you think you’ve imprinted the image of him in your mind with the amount of times you’ve replayed the video as you try to ponder if you’ve ever seen Jungkook before but nothing came in mind.

“Sounds like he’s a sexual fantasy of yours” you threw the rest of your peanuts at Jimin as he doubled in laughter.

“But jokes aside, do you think you could vividly dream about a person you didn’t know in the first place?” you curiously asked as you waited for Jimin to calm down from his laughing fit, adjusting himself on his seat as he properly answered you.

“No? I mean, maybe those are the physical traits you like in a person and your subconscious just so happened to create this ‘Jungkook’ guy” Jimin said.

“You think so?”

“Don’t take it from me though, I’m a veterinarian not a neurologist” you shrugged, returning your attention back on the television.

After the credits rolled on the television, you went inside the room where Bruno is to give him the food and water he needs just before you leave the clinic. He seems to be getting better but it was still clear that he’s still weak at some point.

“Hello, Bruno” you pet his head, cooing as his head leaned further to your touch. 

It reminded you of that time when you would endlessly beg your dad to get a dog, reasoning out that you’re tired of having no one to play with as the only child you are and that a dog was your best bet in having a playmate or so although that did not fully convince for your dad to get you one.

That only resulted for you to ignore your dad for a few days as the brat you are until he came home with a cage where a hamster resides rather than the dog you’re wishing for but it’s enough for you to smile at your dad, thanking him for the new pet.

You mutter a goodbye to the Beagle, standing up to go towards the door when you get suddenly surprised by Hoseok when his head suddenly peeked inside the door.

“Y/N, could you help us for awhile?” Hoseok said, resting his shoulders on the door frame. 

“Are you going to put up some Christmas decorations?” you said as soon as you saw the box he’s carrying where a ‘Christmas Stuff’ is labelled on the front with a permanent marker.

“Yeah, it’ll be just quick though” Hoseok reassured you since the clinic already closed a few minutes ago.

“Alright” you grabbed the box from Hoseok, exiting the room to find Jimin already setting up the mini Christmas Tree in the waiting area. 

“How many days is it before Christmas?” you asked, standing up on a chair as you try to stick the garland against the walls.

“Uh twenty nine days” Jimin grabbed the rest of the garland as he assisted you.

“Oh really? Time must’ve passed by quickly” 

“Yeah, days are shorter during this time of the year so maybe that’s why” Hoseok shrugged as he embellished the Christmas Tree with some decorative balls.

It was spring when you started to work in the clinic which means that it has also been mostly eight or nine months since your stay. You were only supposed to work here for six months but you’ve quite enjoyed it that you managed to delay applying for a job in your field, thinking how you’re going to complete a year in the clinic before you do so.

—

Sitting on your bed, you managed to turn the television on to continue the movie you were watching last weekend whilst you slurp over the instant noodles you’ve cooked yourself as your late lunch since your dad isn’t home as he usually is this time since his work demands him to be present in days like the weekend and holidays.

That’s the great thing about Sundays, it’s the only day you could have the whole day for yourself considering you only have to work until 12 p.m. in the clinic today and you can lounge around your house just by yourself, not that you don’t like the presence of your dad but you guess you’re one of those people who prefers alone time.

You turned off the television once you felt the burning like sensation from your eyes probably because you’ve taken only four hours of sleep last night. Plopping down your head sideways on your pillow, the device came into your sight, remembering how you forgot to wear it last night from how tired you are from decorating the clinic.

The conversation you had with Jimin yesterday came flashing back when he told you that it could be a probability that Jungkook is a character made by your subconscious and Jimin’s not wrong when he told you that Jungkook might be just a reflection of what you want in a person because you could say he’s piqued your interest.

Would you like to continue your dream?

You clicked the ‘No’ option right away as you still find the whole thing quite odd though you’re quite unfazed by now. It has been a while since that first vivid dream you had with your mom so that’s why you hope Reverie won’t alter your dream though that’ll be highly unlikely.

The fireplace is the first thing you saw in your dream, Christmas decorations and picture frames filled the mantel though you can’t completely make out who the individuals in the pictures are but you’re sure it’s someone else’s house.

“What is your dream?” 

You looked sideways to see your mom sitting beside you on the sofa as she sipped something on a mug after she had said that statement, the snow outside the window catching your attention for a second before you looked back at your mom with a quite confused look.

“Like my dream in life?” your mom nodded, intently looking at you.

“I dream of having my own business someday” you said, “But i’m still not sure what kind of business it’ll be?”

“Your dad’s a chef, why don’t you hire him and build a restaurant?” your mom suggested, making you laugh at her suggestion though you think you’re going to consider it into one of your ideas.

“What about you mom?” you laid down on your mom’s lap as you looked up at her whilst she softly caressed your hair, straying out some strands of your hair that had made way into your face.

“I dreamt about having a beautiful daughter when me and your dad got married and look you’re here”

“Isn’t it sad we only get to be together for three years?” you frowned.

“Out of all the years i’ve lived, those three years are the most precious thing that happened to me and it’s because of you, my dear”

You think you must’ve shed some tears as your mom wiped the corners of your eyes with her thumb, gently smiling at you as she told you not to be sad but to be happy.

“There’s a dream I have for you but I could only do so much,” she said, staring straight ahead at something. Your eyes are about to look at where she’s looking at but she held your face gently just before you could turn your head, “Always remember to follow your dreams.”

You could tell when your dream is about to end, it’s when the scene in front of you dims slowly into the void and that’s what’s happening right now but before you could slowly succumb into consciousness, your mom squeezed your hand tightly as if to remind you one last time.

“Follow your dream.”

Tears ran down your face once you opened your eyes, noticing that your tears are what must’ve woken you up. You’ve cried for a bit, thinking how unfortunate it is that she’s gone and how you’ve greatly missed her.

After you’ve calmed, you grab the device as you stick it once again on your temple to continue your dream to ask her about the dream she has for you and also taking advantage of it now that Jungkook didn’t manage to appear.

You found yourself once again in front of the fireplace when you chose to continue your dream. It looks exactly the same when you left although you could hear some Christmas songs playing now and the space beside you where your mom should be seating is now empty.

“I have a surprise for you”

A voice said that doesn’t belong to your mom but you definitely know that it’s Jungkook who seems to be covering your eyes with both of his hands as he whispers into your ear, his breath tickling you a bit.

“What is it?”

“I’ll have to get it first” he said, “Promise me you’ll close your eyes?”

Jungkook took off his hands once you gave him a nod though you’re tempted to open your eyes to see what the surprise is, you tried your best to be obedient and soon enough, you heard his footsteps in front of you.

“Okay, you can open them now”

Jungkook’s hair is now dyed pink like cotton candy pink which caught you by surprise but that’s not what surprised you more because your eyes immediately panned towards the adorable thing he’s cradling like a baby in his arms.

“Merry Christmas!”

“Oh my god a puppy?” you said in awe as you stretched out your hand for Jungkook so that you could cradle it instead though he more of placed it on your lap, making you coo how the Beagle pup is trying to remove the red ribbon that’s loosely tied around its neck with its cute tiny paws.

“I remember when you told me that you wanted a dog ever since you were a kid” Jungkook scratched his head, sitting down beside you who seems to be so caught up with the puppy as you giggled at how playful it is. 

“Let’s call her Buttercup” Jungkook didn’t question you for the name as he instead admired how the big smile on your face made him feel so much warmth in his chest, perhaps it’s because from the sense of pride that he’s the reason behind your happiness although it’s somewhat more of the puppy who's still on your lap. 

“Your gift is much better than mine, I feel bad” you playfully frowned.

“Don’t be, what is it then?”

“It’s in my house, you’ll get to see tomorrow” you winked, thinking if he would even like yours which is a newly released game he’s been dying to play ever since it was announced plus some quirky love note on the side as the low key romantic person you are.

It never even crossed your mind to consider if Jungkook might’ve bought it already, so it’ll be really lame of you if he ever has it though you think he hasn't got it yet when you clearly remember scanning his shelf filled with his games when you came by his house. You can’t help but be worried but if that’s the case then the love note might as well work then.

“Hey, you’re already a gift to me” Jungkook tilted your chin upwards so his eyes could meet your worried ones.

“You’re so mushy” you laughed, gently tilting Jungkook’s head to the side so he can stop staring at you like that, like he’s so into you and it’s making you want to hide and shy away from his stare, “Anyways, thank you-”

“I love you”

You were dumbfounded for a while as you try to process those three words that just came out of Jungkook’s mouth. Your dad wasn’t lying when he told you the time he felt his world stopped when your mom said those words to him for the first time because fuck, this is indeed the first time Jungkook said this to you and you felt like your heart stopped beating too.

“I just wanted to tell you and y-you don’t have to say it back” Jungkook stammered, panic settling within him.

Jungkook’s the one who’s more expressive in your relationship, the one who’s more romantic and cheesier than you while you’re more of an awkward and shy one since Jungkook is your first boyfriend. Not that you don’t love him the same but you’re quite not sure how to properly show affection to him none other than through letters and notes that is.

Impulsively, you cupped Jungkook’s cheek as you leaned in further until your lips were mashed together that’s why it’s understandable that Jungkook’s not been responding to you for a while, possibly shock that you initiated to kiss him when it was always him who’s used to kissing you first. 

Jungkook then smiled as he kissed you back, taking it up a notch when he grabbed your waist towards him, making you straddle him as you put one hand on his shoulder whilst the other is on his neck where you’re gently caressing his hair, making him audibly emit a low hum against your lips, shy at how that got you so bothered.

You felt the warmth of his hands more after it had made its way under the base of your shirt, thumb gently grazing on your skin above your hip bone where he drew circling motions on it, making you emit a chuckle at how ticklish it feels yet it’s enough for you to melt more into the kiss.

Jungkook detached his lips to yours to pepper your chin with kisses instead then making his way to the side of your jaw where he left a trail of wet kisses, eyes closing from pleasure and how good it felt until you got distracted by Buttercup’s bark.

“Wait” you gently pushed Jungkook back by his shoulders so you could look at what’s bothering the puppy who seems to be running back and forth towards the edge of the sofa and practically just barking at the floor, taking a look to see that there’s nothing on the floor which left you to think of what could possibly be bothering her.

“She wants to go down but it’s too high for her” Jungkook helped you out.

You scooped Buttercup up so you could finally place her down on the floor whilst Jungkook held you in place by tightening his hold on your waist so you wouldn’t fall.

With the barking gone, you then smiled, proceeding to continue the heated kiss you shared with Jungkook but not for long as you opened your eyes in panic when you realized something that made you break the kiss once again, removing your weight on Jungkook’s lap to sit instead next to his side, making him furrowed his brows in worry at you.

“What’s wrong?”

“Your parents and your brother could walk in any minute!” you whispered at him, fearing that you might get caught making out with Jungkook in their living room and it’s not good, not when you just met his family.

Jungkook’s family lives in Busan that’s why it took so long for you to actually meet them personally. The reason you’re also here is because you and Jungkook both agreed that you’ll celebrate Christmas Eve with Jungkook’s family while he will then celebrate Christmas itself with you and your dad tomorrow. 

“Let’s go to my room then” Jungkook said as he kissed your cheek, standing up whilst he pulled  your arm to get up and follow him upstairs. You were at the end of the stairs when you heard tiny whimpers coming from the living room.

“Oh no, how could I forget?” you let go of Jungkook’s hand as you briskly walked towards the living room to pick up Buttercup, pecking her kisses and muttering apologies for forgetting and leaving her all alone in the living room.

Once you're back on his side, Jungkook pulled you in by the waist to give you a peck on the lips but he must’ve got carried away as he tried to deepen it, not that you could blame him if it’s addicting in the first place only for Buttercup to ruin the moment again as she barked, causing you two to break away.

“I’m starting to think Buttercup doesn’t like it when i kiss you, hm?” Jungkook said, cupping the Beagle’s head as he glared at her, “Shouldn't you be nice to your dad?”

You watch as Jungkook continuously played with the puppy on your arms, finding it cute that Jungkook just referred to himself as Buttercup’s dad which made him more endearingly adorable if that’s possible. 

“I love you too, Jungkook”

You’d like to believe that Jungkook felt his whole world stopped too just like what happened to you when you noticed how he’s staring at you with wide eyes and mouth agape until he placed a hand on his chest, dramatically heaving a relieved sigh.

“Thank god, I thought i’d be raising this puppy all by myself” you gently shoved Jungkook’s shoulder as he put his hand above where you hit him, face contorting in pain as if he really got hurt, making you chuckle more at his silliness.

“Just lead the way” you pushed him with your free hands when he made no move to go up at all.

“Alright, someone’s too eager” Jungkook doubled in laughter once he felt a slap against his back.

“I love you” he said, stealing a kiss right before he dashed up the stairs.

--

You joined Jimin and Hoseok in the waiting area, sighing as you stretched your neck and shoulders. The clinic was pretty busy for today and you’re glad you don’t have any clients to attend now considering the closing time will be in an hour. Mickey jumped off of Hoseok’s lap to transfer to you instead, smiling at the Santa outfit he’s sporting today.

“Why don’t we watch some news?” Hoseok took the remote from Jimin, both of you not muttering anything as you find the film showing in the television to be a bore anyway. You focused on petting Mickey instead, observing how his eyes were slowly fluttering by the second.

Well, it seems like not only three but the four of you are tired from today. Mickey was about to close his eyes until he got startled from Jimin’s quite loud voice.

“Have you ever dreamt about lottery numbers?” Jimin asked, making you confused until he told you to watch the news which is currently featuring the story of how a man won the lottery simply because of the Reverie device, stating that he won the lottery thanks to the random numbers that showed up in his dreams.

“You own a Reverie?” Hoseok asked but before you could answer, Jimin interjected to explain why you got it whilst you continue to watch the news again where they’re showing a similar story from the lottery man.

A high school student whose identity was disclosed is shown holding her nearly perfect exam paper to the camera, saying how she dreamt about the contents of the exam beforehand the test that’s why she was able to get a high score and how she intentionally omitted mistakes to not raise suspicions.

“Did something like that happen to you?” Jimin asked, shaking your head no, “Still dreaming about your mom?”

“Yeah but not that often anymore, it’s more of-”

“Jungkook?” Jimin cut you off, laughing as he saw you nod at him, “Any sexual fantasies yet?”

“No!...That’s ridiculous” you denied though it’s clear that you’re embarrassed because it was exactly three days ago since that Christmas Eve make out session with Jungkook happened. You stopped using Reverie for a while because of how that particular thing weirded you out because who even is Jungkook and why are you doing something intimate with him?

You’re scared because what if Jimin is right and Jungkook is a sexual fantasy of yours that you just strongly deny but it’s not like you completely dislike the idea of Jungkook, it’s just taken you aback how things escalated quickly. After all, there’s no harm dreaming about him.

“Well, you should tell me if ever you’ve dreamt about lottery numbers, okay?” Jimin said, winking at you.

“Why would she tell you? If I were her, I'd just enter those numbers by myself” Hoseok argued, “Plus, isn’t this just some kind of marketing ploy for the device?”

If you come to think of it, maybe Hoseok’s right. Reverie is surely just producing these kinds of stories in order to steer away from its bad reputation the internet has given them though for you, they should’ve let it be - bad marketing is still a form of marketing. It’s not like you could blame the company, they gotta do what they need to do to save its image.

How you wish that you get to have the same kind of dreams from the users they’ve interviewed but you only manage to dream about this boy who only continues to exist in your dreams instead. 

Jungkook is his name and his family lives in Busan - those are only the two things that makes him distinct from your dreams but you’re sure that it’s only your subconscious who made that up. Sometimes, your curiosity gets you to wonder things about him that’s beyond what your mind can imagine.

What if Jungkook does exist in reality?

--

“Hi, how may i help you?” you asked once you saw a woman enter the store with a dog on a leash and a little girl came following

“We’re here for the 2 p.m. appointment”

You did your usual task of retrieving the records and clipping them on a clipboard for Jimin to take. Assisting the woman to the room where Hoseok is supposedly preparing the materials and equipment needed. 

“Just sit and wait for me, okay?” the woman crouched down as she said this to the little girl until she looked back at you, “Can you please look over her for a while? Thank you”

You guided the little girl towards the waiting area as you told her that she could watch the television while she waits for her mom, leaving her to walk back to your desk once she got settled though you would still look at her from time to time.

With nothing else to do, you find yourself writing down your signature repeatedly on scratch paper until you get tired of it, resorting to writing another word or perhaps another name - Jungkook.

It has been a week since you managed to continue using Reverie again and you noticed that Jungkook is pretty much an inhabitant of your dreams by now with the amount of time he appears more in it than your mom that you started to be more accustomed with the boy and there’s no denying that you have come to let him live in your dreams.

Sometimes, you feel bad that you’re more looking forward to dreaming about Jungkook than your mom nowadays though you still hope she could appear once again. You’ve been missing the talks you have with her specially if the last talk you’ve had with her was back at Jungkook’s family house where she told you to follow your dreams.

“Hello miss” 

You stopped from writing down Jungkook’s name as you heard little grunting sounds coming in front of you. One pair of cute tiny hands came into your view, the girl clearly trying to clutch both of her fingers around the edge of your desk as she finally managed to propped her chin after successfully tiptoeing.

“Hello, what can i do for you?” you said in a rather cheery voice to match her energy.

“Can i watch some cartoons, please?” you can now only see her eyes at this point, figuring that she must’ve given up from trying to reach the desk.

“Sure” you grabbed the remote from your side as you stood up to make your way and sit towards the waiting area with the little girl. You’re just casually switching the channels as you told the little girl to tell you to stop if she finds what she wants to watch.

“Cinderella!” the little girl squealed.

“Oh would you like to watch that?” 

The little girl nodded at you, increasing the volume as you relaxed back to your chair to watch the Disney film until you notice her singing along to A Dream Is a Wish Your Heart Makes in that scene where Cinderella was assisted by the birds and mouses as she gets ready for the day.

“No matter how your heart is grieving,

If you keep on believing, 

The dream that you wish will come true”

“You must’ve watched it a lot of times, hm?” you asked once you noticed she knows the lyrics to the song all too well.

“Birds aren’t nice,” the girl said, “I thought they’re helpful.”

“What do you mean?” 

The little girl then proceeded to tell you that one time she’s too lazy to fix her bed in the morning so an idea popped in her mind once she saw the movie. Since they have a love bird in their garden, she thought it’d be a good idea to get the cage and set them free into her room, thinking that they’ll help her clean the room just like in Cinderella.

“Did your mom get angry at you?” you stifled a laugh at how cute and innocent this little girl is who then pouted and nodded at your question.

“But it was funny watching her and dad trying to catch and get them back” the girl giggled as she recalled the memory.

Not long after, the little girl’s mom came out of the room, making her way towards the desk to pay the fees.

“Thank you for watching over her”, the woman said as you gave her a polite smile.

“Goodbye Miss!” The girl cutely waved at you, waving back at her as you gush at her cuteness.

Time pretty much passed by quickly after the little girl left because next thing you know, you’re getting off at the bus stop, walking towards your house as you keep your head up to look at the clear sky, giving you a perfect view of the stars.

You then refrain from walking once you spotted the familiar star which your mom told you where she is in your dreams. Smiling at the thought even though you probably look crazy with how you look - standing at the side of the road and smiling at the sky.

“I miss you” you said under your breath, “I’ll promise to follow my dreams”

--

“Wait, I’m getting the change” you chuckled as Jungkook impatiently tugged your arm as soon as he heard that the Disney Illumination Show will start in five minutes.

Grabbing the churros from the vendor, Jungkook then started to drag you along with him towards the front of the Cinderella Castle, chuckling in the process as you can’t help how Jungkook acts like a child with how excited he is right now that he even devoured his churros as fast as possible so he could potentially focus during the show.

Thankfully, you got a pretty good spot and you’ve arrived right in time as the show is just about to begin in a minute.

The lights that are lighting up the castle are then turned off only to be back on but are now illuminated with different Disney animations, music then starts playing with the water fountain and fireworks perfectly synced to the beat, clearly understanding Jungkook’s excitement for the show as you stand and watch in awe.

Halfway to the show, you glanced beside Jungkook to see his glassy eyes, remembering how Jungkook could get so emotional and touched in things like this and next thing you know a tear rolled down on his face that you managed to wipe with your thumbs as you endearingly smile at him.

Jungkook chuckled, clearly abashed that he unknowingly cried resulting in him to pull you in towards his chest, enclosing you in a back hug where he rested his chin on your shoulder. You look sideways at him to kiss his cheek, placing your hand on his arm as you continue to watch.

“Isn’t it beautiful?” you asked.

“Do you want me to say you’re beautiful too?” Jungkook teased as he raised his eyebrows at you.

“If you say so” 

“You glow more than these fireworks” 

“You’re cheesy, I hate you” you glanced at your side to see Jungkook already staring at you.

“But you love it anyway” Jungkook smiled, leaning his head towards you to kiss you on your cheeks and then on the corner of your mouth until you moved your head a bit to the right so that you could fully kiss him.

“I could still taste the sugar” you chuckled, turning around to wipe the corner of Jungkook’s lips with the sleeves of your sweater from the sugar he possibly got from the churros.

You turned back to your previous position as you continue to watch the show and as soon as it ended, you two headed out towards the exit with Jungkook wildly swinging both of your hands that are intertwined while his other hand is holding the bag that contains the BB-8 Soda Container and two shirts that you got in the souvenir shop.

as he keeps on singing the songs that played out in the show awhile ago but he’s more particularly singing the song in the Cinderella movie.

“Did you have fun?” Jungkook asked in between the songs he kept on singing ever since the show ended, more particularly the song from Cinderella that played out in the show. 

“Yeah, it felt so magical right?” 

“Being here with you is magical enough” Jungkook raised your intertwined hands as he kissed the back of your hand, smiling as he saw you leaning your face towards his arm to hide how flustered that just made you feel.

“I hate you” you mumbled, still hiding your face in his arms.

“I know, I love you too”

Jungkook removed his hand from yours to place it instead on your shoulders to pull you more into his side, kissing the crown of your head as he continued singing the song that has managed to plague his mind.

‘Have faith in your dreams and someday,

Your rainbow will come smiling through.

No matter how your heart is grieving,

If you keep on believing,

The dream that you wish will come true.’

When you opened your eyes, you were then drifted back to reality when the ceiling of your room came into view. You then placed your hand on top of your chest as soon as you felt your heart thumping rapidly, smiling as you relive the dream that got you so giddy first thing in the morning.

But then you were pulled out from your dreamy state when you grabbed your phone, thinking you woke up right before your alarm went off but it looks like you’ve slept through it when you saw the time and Hoseok’s text, asking your whereabouts.

You threw your blanket away off of you, rushing inside your bathroom to get ready as fast as possible and next thing you know, you’re right outside of your house in just fifteen minutes, locking your door as you jog towards the bus stop which is thankfully just a few meters away from your house but then morning rush sure is hell as you notice the slow traffic flow.

As if you aren’t startled enough from being late, your phone went off to show that Hoseok’s calling you.

“Hi Y/N, where-”

“Hoseok, I woke up late, I'm sorry but I’ll be there in twenty minutes!” you said, quickly rushing towards the train station which is the best possible mode of transportation in your situation right now even though you’ll have to switch trains but it’s not like you have any choice anyway.

“Okay, just make sure you’ll make it in time for the two appointments in the next hour”

After the call ended, you quickly placed your phone in your pocket wherein you also retrieved your transportation card to scan it through the turnstile gate only for it not to open since your card’s balance is insufficient, making you even more agitated as you load your card down by the ticketing machine.

Thankfully, you passed through the gates and you’re now rushingly going up the escalator as soon as you felt the incoming rumbles of the train but then a man was blocking the walking side of the escalator.

“Excuse me” you said but the man made no move to step aside, annoying you even more until you noticed that he’s wearing earphones. The man just noticed that he’s on the wrong side of the elevator when you tapped him on the shoulder, profusely apologizing as you lightly smiled before you ran up again.

As soon as you got on the platform, the doors of the train closed as if luck wasn't by your side this morning. Sighing, you make your way to one of the seats as you feel your adrenaline rush wearing out, finally accepting that you’re late for work.

The clinking sound of coins hitting against the ground has caught your attention, turning your head to the side to see an old man bending down to pick up his coins whilst one of his coins managed to roll towards your direction, only stopping as it bumped the side of your shoes..

You picked it up as you went over to the old man to give it until he smiled at you, stopping your hand that’s about to give him his coin.

“Keep the change” he chuckled as he rode the elevator, leaving you quite puzzled all of a sudden because why does it feel like this has happened before yet it feels strangely unfamiliar at the same time perhaps could this be just a deja vu?

Until you remembered why it was so familiar to begin with. Skeptically, you tossed the coin in the air just to catch it mid-air as you slammed it at the back of your hand just to see if it’ll result into the same scene that happened before in your dreams

You don’t know why you’re so anxious to remove your hand. Perhaps you might freak out a bit if it happens to land on tails but there’s still a bit of probability that it could land on heads instead.

No, it landed on tails.

Baffled, you thought to yourself that this could be just a coincidence. You start to feel the hairs on your skin rise and your hands are starting to become clammy because you know well how the next scene will play out.

What if Jungkook is standing on the other side of the tracks?

It can’t be, Jungkook is just a figment of my subconscious, you reminded yourself.

You grasped the coin in your hand, fidgeting with it as you watch the train pick up its speed by the second, setting aside your hair that has made its way to your face from the gush of wind, anticipation building up by the second.

Waiting.

Impatiently Waiting.

The rumbling sounds of the train completely faded out in the distance making the station a quiet and calm place. Once again, you heard the clinking sound of the coin hitting the ground.

‘Follow your dreams’ is what your mom told you but is it possible for your dreams to follow you?  As inconceivable it may seem, you're directly looking at a boy you just saw in your dreams and a boy you never knew existed in reality until now.

Who would know that the conscious could meet the subconscious.

--

A/N: I guess I took the futuristic!au quite literally. I think it wasn’t futuristic enough except for the device though it somewhat looks like it’ll fit as a Black Mirror episode haha. Hope you liked this one!

Also, coffee?

#jungkook imagine #jungkook fluff #bts imagine #btsghostie #bangtanscenery #btsghostiebingo #jungkook mystery #bts mystery #bts fluff #jeon jungkook scenarios #bts scenarios #jungkook scenarios #jungkook x reader #bts x reader #jungkook one shot #bts one shot #jungkook futuristic au #bts futuristic au #jungkoon fanfic #bts fanfic #jeon jungkook #jungkook #park jimin #jimin #jung hoseok #hoseok #vantaenims

[absoluteyoongit]

in loving memory

⇢ pairing: ghost!taehyung x gender neutral!reader, jin x gender neutral!reader

⇢ genre: big angst, with a little fluff

⇢ word count: 10.1K

⇢ warnings: MCD nothing graphic tae’s just...yk a ghost, reader has depression and anxiety

⇢ summary: the love of your life was gone, he wasn’t coming back. At least in any way you could hope for.

⇢ author’s note: bueller is finally back with some angst. thanks to @youarejesting​, @rougebangtan​, and @bangtanloverboys​ for reading this and giving me words of encouragement, it means so much to me. Also thank you @purpleskies1999​ for the amazing banner, I love it.

part of btsghostiewriters bingo bash: prompt- ghost

~

Have you ever loved someone so much you ceased living for yourself but lived for them?

That was the only explanation Taehyung could imagine as to why he sat silently, watching you sleep peacefully from the corner of the room. The person he loved so dearly looked captivating even In deep sleep. His gaze, vigilant on your vulnerable form.

Your soft snores filled the otherwise silent room. Drool pooling at the base of the pillow where your mouth laid open against it. Round cheeks puffing up as your face squished against the pillow. Strands of wild hair standing in all different directions from bed head. Arms holding the body pillow in a death grip with knuckles tense. Eyelids fluttering as you dreamed—of something happy, Tae wished—nose flexing as you breathed in and out. A streak of moonlight adorned your face, highlighting the still damp tear stains that had yet to dry.

Taehyung admired you from afar, so close but the farthest away he could ever be.

He pried his eyes away from your sleeping figure for the first time since you collapsed onto the bed from exhaustion.

The usually tidy, cozy studio apartment was an abandoned disheveled mess. A mountain of dirty dishes waiting to be washed piled around the kitchen sink, worn clothes littered the ground—despite not changing your oversized sweater in the past week or so—a stockpile of takeout boxes cluttered on the ground next to the already full garbage can. Plants you had painstakingly cared for wilted. Art and pictures that once decorated the walls, taken down and placed in a corner to not be seen again. Pictures of him and you.

Taehyung’s eyes rested on the picture you found earlier, the memory which caused your emotional outburst, leaving you drained. The picture was from your second anniversary. He took you to the city’s local fair, the same place the two of you had your first date, the same place as your first kiss. Both of you just got off of a deathtrap of a ride; your hairs stuck up in different directions from being blown out, much like the bed head you sported at the moment. Your arms clung to his waist as you walked forward while he wrapped around your shoulders. The two of you possessed the biggest smiles of your life, eyes crinkled in euphoria. You looked toward the camera while his gaze was on you like it always was. That was the happiest day of his life besides the day you said yes. Your smile from that day was almost identical to the one in this picture but with the addition of joyful tears.

It was a shame he never got to see you walk down the aisle.

The smile he wore did not reach his eyes. He never would have left you if he knew you would end up in this state. It has been months since he’s been gone but you continued falling down, spiraling out of control, never trying to climb back out. He couldn’t stand it, seeing you like this. He hated it. He realized a long time ago that he could not do anything about it.

Taehyung remembered the day it happened. He woke up in a hospital, surrounded by frightening cords and monitors. Bolting from his bed, frantically searching for your room to hope you were okay, alive. Now he realized that was too easy, too straightforward. He should have known that leaving the bed without any struggle was a red flag but all he cared about was whether you were okay or not.

It wasn’t until he reached your room that the realization occurred. You were unconscious but alive, the monitor checking your heartbeat sounded off steadily. Before he could ask the attending nurse about your condition, she walked through him.

The initial shock of his death was quick. He cried over your body, inconsolable, until the moment you opened your eyes. Ever since then all he cared about was you but Why make you his unfinished business if he couldn’t do anything to ease your pain.

He sighed, there was nothing to be done, nothing he could change. He would gladly die again if it had to be him or you. Hell, he would have gotten himself killed if you died in the accident and not him. Life would not be worth it without you in it. He prayed to whatever was out there that you were stronger than he was and continued on. He would be content to watch you for eternity even if it meant watching you move on.

The thought of you meeting someone new left a bittersweet taste in his mouth. On one hand, he would do anything to see your bright smile again but on the other, he wanted to be the cause of that smile and no one else.

A soft whimper stirred him from his trance, his head snapping to you in worry. Another nightmare? Your lower lip quivered as your breaths grew more labored and heavy. The arms that already held his pillow close crushed them tighter, your eyes squeezing harder. Baby hairs stuck to your face, dampening from the sweat collecting on your skin.

On instinct, Taehyung rushed over to your side. The once heavy pads of his feet registering as nothing more than a mere whisper in the dark room. The palms of his hands steadied him as he leaned towards your shivering body, your cries now louder than low whimpers.

Taehyung’s focus was entirely spent on trying to soothe you; so singularly focused that he missed the way the bed dipped from his invisible weight or the way the blanket shifted when his foot slid across it.

He looked down at your crying features, faces inches apart, so close that if he was paying attention he would notice the ghost of his breath flutter against your eyelashes.

All he wanted was to comfort you but like the many times since he left, he was unsure about how to help. For all he knew, you could not feel his presence. You didn’t feel the way he clung to you as you sat alone in the hospital crying after hearing the news or the way he held your hand during his funeral. You never reacted to him then so why should you now?

That didn’t stop him from closing the distance between your faces, pressing a chaste kiss to your forehead. The wrinkles that settled there slowly relaxed as your cries gradually lessened into hiccups. The fierce grip on the pillow he used to use loosened, your knuckles no longer white.

The soft adoration he felt seeing you calm down dissipated and was replaced by pure shock once he realized what just happened. You reacted to him. You felt his lips, at least felt them enough to ease you back into a more peaceful slumber. He held his useless breath, the disbelief lingering on his face as he moved to touch you more. Rough calloused hands cupped your jaw, thumbs rubbing in a soothing motion. His heart stopped for the second time that night as he witnessed you lean closer into his embrace. He could not believe it. After months of losing hope he would ever connect to you again, you felt his presence, even if you responded in your sleep.

Pure excitement filled Taehyung’s veins as he gripped both sides of your face, planting fervent kisses all over. He was desperate for you to feel his love for you, desperate to let you know that he was still around and that he would never leave.

You stirred, feeling the lightest of pecks all over your face. The sensation was cold but something about these chilling phantom touches warmed your heart, they were familiar and comforting. Opening your eyes, you felt an unexplainable disappointment seeing only a streak of light from the streetlight on your ceiling.

Your heart clenched. You swore you felt a weight, felt someone, felt him, on top of you. You held back a sob, trying not to cry again. The memories of the accident and the white walls of the hospital already haunted your dreams. You didn’t need this delusion to bring forth more memories. Finally catching your breath, you sat up and eyed the clock on your nightstand. 4:52 am. You exhaled, deciding to start your day in fear of what you would see if you closed your eyes again.

Taehyung’s eyes followed you with sadness from his position on the bed. You had looked straight through him. Deep down he knew that you would never actually see him again but the longing on your face as you unknowingly stared into his eyes devastated him.

His lingering eyes trailed you as you made coffee. Taehyung was mesmerized by the way your body gracefully moved about the kitchen, the way he always did when he was alive. He longed for the touch of your soft skin, longed for your fingers as they threaded through his wavy hair. Craved the way your long legs would wrap around his waist as he pressed against a hard surface. He yearned for the silk of your lips against his. He missed the way your body fit perfectly against his.

An optimistic smile replaced the solemn one on his face, a newfound hope bubbling up in his chest. You felt him. Even if you did not see him or recognize his touch, you still felt him. There was hope that he could make you understand that he was still here, with you.

Taehyung was a determined man. If he didn’t pass on because of his love for you he was going to try with all of his might to make you feel it.

~

The city seemed more crowded than usual as you silently weaved in and out of the masses on the sidewalk. Maybe it was the fact you haven’t left your apartment since the funeral that fueled your anxiety. It’s been three months since you have come into contact with this many people; grateful that your boss allowed you to work remotely part-time while you grieved. It would have been impossible to show your face at work.

However, your vacation from work was ending soon and the very thought of witnessing pity on your coworkers’ faces when you returned made you sick. You needed some casual human interaction as preparation before heading back to the warzone; so when your friend Jin reached out, offering to take you out for lunch, you accepted. It was the little nudge you needed to start integrating back into normal life. At least, as normal as it could get.

Taking a moment to look down at your clothes, you grimaced. Stained sweatpants—from what looks like pizza or some kind of hot sauce—a huge oversized Nike sweater, and a pair of mismatched socks with sandals. You were a mess. Not only were you regretting not putting a little more effort into your outfit because of the stares you got but also because you were sweating. It wasn’t scalding out but the unblocked sun in the sky made it feel many degrees hotter than it actually was. Hopefully, Jin would take pity on you; not his actual pity but if he commented on your attire you’d probably cry.

One of your favorite cafés came into view; reading its name made your mouth dry. The anxiety building up from your journey here reached a boiling point. This was a bad idea.

You and Taehyung would come to this very café every day after your shared English class, freshman year of university. You froze, not bearing the thought of stepping inside. The window booth where the two of you would always study together was in full view. This is where you fell in love with him.

“Do you want your usual? I’m buying today.”

“You can’t say you’re buying every time we come here. How are you not broke yet?”

He shrugged, “I am smart with my money. I only spend it on things I care about.”

“You care about my coffee?”

“I care about you.”

Taehyung confessed to you here that day, he asked you on your first date here, he asked you to be his partner here. It was all too much. The pain in your chest grew, breath quickening, as you stood at the storefront. Jin was in clear view, sitting in the exact spot Taehyung would sit at. Flashes of his face replaced Jin’s as you imagined Taehyung sitting there, waiting for you. Why did you agree to meet here when Jin suggested it? Maybe he would understand if you canceled on him right now. It wasn’t unreasonable right?

Your shoulders twisted, ready to turn around and run, but something stopped you. It felt like a chilling breeze on a cold day, except it didn’t pass over you, it was isolated on your shoulder. The cold air swirled around your body, tickling you. The sensation was comforting, almost as if it was urging you forward toward the entrance of the restaurant. It reminded you of the invisible weight you felt just a week ago.

On instinct, you let the cool touch guide you inside towards your awaiting friend. As soon as Jin locked gazes with you the feeling left, strangely leaving you colder than before despite the heat outside. Jin waved you over with a gentle smile on his face. You donned a nervous one, walking over and sitting down.

Taehyung watched as you and Jin conversed through the window. He released a breath he didn’t realize he was holding. He could not believe that worked.

In all honesty, Taehyung was a nervous wreck. Sure, he was able to wake you up with his touch a few nights ago but doubt swelled in him since then. He worried that it was all a figment of his imagination, some cruel force messing with him. He refrained from attempting to touch you again because of that fear; scared that the little blossom of hope he held would wilt away. But seeing you stand frozen, in your own fear, in front of the place that carried so many memories, made him snap. He needed to have you know that you were not alone, you had people who cared. He could not let you run away from the one friend you two shared.

That’s when in desperation, Taehyung grabbed your shoulder. He barely felt the warmth of he knew your body provided but it was there. Just like the night where his kisses found your face, he felt only a fraction of the warmth he used to. It was enough for him. The weak sensation connected him to you. He craved it and desired it more than anything to feel that connection and comfort from his touch.

Taehyung felt desperate. Desperate for you to recognize he was here, that he just didn’t fade into oblivion, that his love was stronger than death.

He focused back on the reunion at hand, he would figure out his next steps later but for now, he wanted you to feel better than you did this morning. He hoped Jin could help.

Jin did help. He made you use your voice for the first time in months that did not involve crying. However, the conversation didn’t last long. As much as you needed the social interaction you were overwhelmed from the phantom presence earlier. It frightened you. It didn’t scare you in the way where you feared something bad would happen. No, it was more about the way your body reacted to it. Like the familiar affectionate touch of a friend’s hand on your shoulder, it made you feel lighter. It confused you. The thoughts scattered around your head blocked you from having any meaningful conversation with Jin. Short straight to the point responses was all you could muster.

You tried ignoring the concerned look on Jin’s face after exchanging pleasantries for the fourth time but you could tell that he wasn’t going to be quiet about it for long. Jin was always upfront and blunt, something you admire about him, but it made you nervous now.

“Y/N, are you okay?”

Jin watched you flinch as the words left his mouth. That simple question held a monstrous weight. Jin knew that. He knew that question could trigger a waterfall of pent up emotions. He was prepared though. In his opinion, the dam you had built over the past three months needed to break.

You were a dam. Someone who bottled up their feelings, preferring to deal with them alone until one day you crack. Jin wanted to be there for you when that day came. You had been alone for so long he was afraid of what would happen if you retreat into yourself again.

When he set up this rendezvous he expected you to be emotional. That’s why he picked this café; he wanted you to be vulnerable with him. What he wasn’t expecting was for you to be stuck in a stupor. Your one to two word responses did not satisfy him. He was worried even more now.

Y/N and Taehyung were some of his closest friends, so when he heard that both of you ended up in the hospital because of an accident and only one of you was recovering it was heartbreaking.

It hurt him more when you cried at the hospital and the funeral. You didn’t let anyone touch you or console you. It was the lowest he’s ever seen you and it was evident that you have not improved over the past couple of months. Jin knew that you and Taehyung had something special; the word love could not describe all the feelings the two of you had for each other. The two of you convinced him soulmates existed.

“Do you want to go home? I understand if this is too much right now,” Jin gently pressed, “I’ll still be here tomorrow if you need today.” His hand slid across the table to where your hands fisted, tenderly smoothing his thumb over your tense knuckles. Wordlessly you nodded. You began your day hopeful but now all you were was overwhelmed.

Jin's gaze lingered on you as you got up and exited the café without a goodbye. You were not ready for him today but he was determined to help you get back on your feet soon. He wouldn’t leave you like this, he couldn’t, not when you were special to him.

~

The next few weeks consisted of slow improvements.

After failing to genuinely speak to another human being you asked your boss for another two months out of the office. While she was hesitant to allow it, the desperation in your emails convinced her to say yes. Since then Jin had gradually maneuvered into your daily life.

One day he came knocking, asking if he could come in to clean. It took a short argument before you allowed him inside. You felt terrible, disgusted even, because of the state of your apartment. You couldn’t bring yourself to clean it. Jin had simply said, “You need this and I am going to do it for you because I care.”

You watched him from the bed, ashamed that even as he cruised around the apartment you couldn’t help. A weight on your shoulders prevented you. Jin did not speak another word to you that day; silently loading the washer with the clothes that scattered the floor, picking up the random trash littering your space, and washing the dishes that piled up in your kitchen.

Jin didn’t even say goodbye to you as he quietly left the apartment, taking two full trash bags out with him. When you left the bed after he left you examined his work. It wasn’t spotless but it was the cleanest it has been since the day Taehyung died. You appreciated Jin’s gesture and made a promise to him and yourself that you would try and keep it clean. Your heart felt a little lighter that day.

The next time Jin invaded your space he brought food with him. It wasn’t the same old take out that made up your diet as of late but a cozy home-cooked meal. The dish wasn’t your favorite but the action was enough for the knot in your chest to loosen and make your cheeks rosy. Every day since the café, Jin made a considerable effort to connect with you, even if all it only was a good morning and goodnight text. To say you were grateful was an understatement. The more he reached out the more you returned and soon enough you craved his presence. With him, life became easier. It almost balanced out the longing you felt from the cold caresses you felt daily since the time in front of the café.

The touches started off light, leaving you to doubt they even existed, then they got stronger and stronger each day. From the feeling of a cool hand against your neck to the sensation of fingers threading through yours. One night, when it was hard to find sleep, you swore your hair moved as if someone was playing with it. Whatever it was, it helped you fall asleep and every other night you could fall asleep.

Whatever it was only scared you at the beginning. The day you met up with Jin was overwhelming in a lot of ways and the phantom encouragement did not help. The first few times it happened since then you flinched away, only to soon relax and find comfort in the cold.

The nostalgia in the invisible force was powerful, all-consuming. Whenever you felt its presence it felt like someone wrapped you in the fluffiest blanket and sat you in front of a fireplace. You started feeling warmth in the coldest touch.

You wanted to tell Jin, you really did, but you were afraid of what he would think. You almost felt normal, that things were going to be okay. Jin was proud of you and your improvements. You tell from the way he smiled when you cooked him instead or when you willingly wandered around the city with him, no destination in mind. You were afraid that the mere mention of a ghostly caress against your cheek would bring back the worry in his eyes. You did not want to lose the admiration you could see in his eyes.

Inch by inch your life was returning to a new normal. He wasn’t with you anymore but Jin slowly filled the giant hole in your heart, along with the phantom whose touch reminded you of him. It's almost like he never left.

~

Still being in love with someone who was dead hurt a lot. Tears welled up in your eyes as you looked down at the picture taken on your second anniversary. It was almost a year since his death and you felt the need to look through the pictures you carefully tucked away in your apartment and your memory.

Furiously rubbing your eyes, too stubborn to let any tears fall, you dropped the frame on the kitchen counter. It was too painful to look at. Why did you think this was a good idea, right before the anniversary of his death? It felt like all your hard work, building up your confidence, and mending the tear in your heart, was all for nothing. You would never stop loving him. What was the point of moving on?

At that moment you felt so alone, more alone than at Taehyung’s actual funeral. Your arms circled around yourself, attempting to bring yourself some comfort. The apartment felt so cold without him.

The phantom touch you have come to crave snaked around you, resting on top of your arms. The isolated breeze whipped around making you shudder, an invisible weight laid on your shoulder. You never got used to how the cold warmed your heart. It didn’t matter anymore, especially at this moment, the touch was comforting and that’s all you needed to finally let your tears fall, the dam breaking.

Minutes passed as you cried hard in the cool embrace. Ugly sobs wracked your body leaving you weak. You would have dropped to your knees if it wasn’t for the invisible hold on your body.

Soon the familiar fire burned in your chest, coaxing you down till the cries turned into quiet hiccups, then silence. Only the sound of your occasional sniffle and beating heart filled the room. Still standing, your eyelids drooped down from exhaustion. Sleep would take over any minute now but you didn’t want the cold arms around you to leave. Deep down you knew they weren’t going away anytime soon but that didn’t stop you from fearing this would be the last time you felt this comfort.

Taehyung’s heart broke watching you cry. He knew that the closer his death date approached the more fragile you would become. That is why he had grown bolder in the ways he touched you, from kissing your eyelids while you tried to sleep to mischievously tapping you hard to give you a quick fright. He realized it was cruel the first couple times he did it but how else would he convey his silly side to you.

Holding you now like this took the most effort he’s ever had to exert; with the kisses and caresses, he didn’t have to support you. It took a lot of energy to do this but listening to your sobs die down to a whisper made it worth it. Taehyung’s eyes snapped down to your face, hearing a light snore coming out of your parted mouth. You had fallen asleep in his arms. It brought a soft smile to his face which was quickly replaced by dread. He did not know how long he could maintain this.

Your unconscious body leaned further into the cold, the familiar feeling of Taehyung’s grasp. It was cruel how much the cold felt like him but your body did not care, continuing to lean back into nothing. The soles of your feet lifted as the last of Taehyung’s energy faded. He sharply inhaled as your body fell straight through his incorporeal body.

You woke with a thud, groaning against the floor. You slowly pried your eyes open, disoriented from the fall and quick nap. Rubbing the sleep out of your eyes, you leaned against the counter from your position on the floor. You were emotionally exhausted. You let out a defeated sigh, bringing your arms around you once more. Sleep did not find you again that night as you silently gazed out the large apartment window till the sun came up.

~

The door of your apartment slammed shut, jolting you awake from your position over your now soggy cereal. You knew who it was, there was no one else in your life that was close enough to you to earn the extra key to your apartment. As soon as you gifted it to him Jin took it as an invitation to visit you unannounced at any time.

The sound of dangling keys drew your attention to Jin’s face. It was no secret that your friend was attractive, hell, he brought it up all the time. As the two of you grew closer that turned more into an inside joke. He looked at you expectantly, waiting for some kind of greeting, but your mind was solely focused on the way his white shirt exposed his prominent collarbone. That singular focus shifting to gaze at his beauty in full; broad shoulders, plump pouty lips, strong le–

“Get up! Come on, we are going out today” Jin commanded, breaking you from your shameless adoration of his body.

“What if I don’t want to go out?” you pouted but in reality, you knew you needed to get out. As the anniversary of Taehyung’s death came you became closed off. Jin didn’t blame you for being distant but he didn’t want you falling back into a downward spiral and neither did you. You depended on him a lot more than either of you cared to voice. Jin was a reassuring bright light in your life that filled the holes in your chest, almost all of them. The ghost, you have come to affectionately call it, continued comforting you in a way Jin could not. There was a unique sensation those invisible hands gave you and you wouldn’t trade it for anything right now.

Jin gave you a pointed look “I am not taking a ‘no’ for an answer. It’s supposed to be a beautiful day and you need some vitamin D– you look like a ghost.” He raised an eyebrow, daring you to argue with him. Rolling your eyes in response, you got off of the chair, not in the mood to argue because you knew he was right. Secretly, you liked being dragged out by him, you needed that little extra motivation.

“Lemme just get changed. Where are we going?”

“That’s a surprise,” Jin smirked, “Just wear something casual, and don’t worry about it.”

You grimaced. You hated surprises and uncertainty; if you could have one superpower it would be to predict the future. Jin caved a little, seeing the look on your face, “I promise you it will be a good day. Trust me.”

A kindhearted smile replaced his mischievous one, it made you trust him. He knows how much you had grieved the past couple of weeks, he would not take you anywhere that would trigger any upsetting memories.

At least that’s what you thought.

Swarms of excited children followed by tired parents, groups of teenage friends, and young couples crowded the entrance of the city’s annual Summer’s Eve fair. Eyes locked onto the giant banner, which had not changed since the first year this festival ran, making you shiver. Was it really a good idea; spending the day at the same place you and Tae had your first kiss, the same place where you and Tae celebrated your second anniversary? Did Jin not know?

“I– I don’t know about this Jin. Can we go somewhere else?” your voice wavered. You wanted to be strong but this was a line you were not sure you were ready to cross.

Jin did not want to take you anywhere else. While it may have been cruel to bring you here, right after the anniversary of Taehyung's death, he wanted to elicit a reaction out of you. Either you would break down and release needed emotions, or you would remember all the memories of him and see it's okay to enjoy life again. It didn't matter to him what reaction you would have. The fair had been one of your all-time favorite events of the year and Jin thought it could bring some of your old life back.

"It's okay y/n," Jin comforted you, giving your shoulder a quick squeeze, "We don't have to stay if you really don't want to but I think it could be..." He looked up to the sky as he searched for the right word, "...therapeutic?"

You stared at him with large eyes, the thought of bolting was tempting but the hopeful and encouraging smile on Jin’s face had you second-guessing. Jin cared for you; he has been your lifeline for the past couple of months, he would not have put you in this situation if he thought coming to the fair was not beneficial for you.

Jin understood you more than you could ever know and he had been the best thing in your life since Tae. You needed to trust him. You wanted to trust him.

Closing your eyes, you took a deep breath to ready yourself. "Okay," you exhaled, "Let's go then." Jin beamed at you and you returned a hesitant one. You trusted him, deep down you felt safe with him.

"Alright then, games and rides are on me. What do you want to do first?"

You gazed around through the crowds of people until you spotted a familiar game. A small but enthusiastic smile grew on your face, you turned and grabbed Jin's hand, "Let's go to that one first."

"Balloon darts it is, come on." Jin pulled you towards the station with your hand in his, slowly intertwining both of your fingers together. "I cannot wait to beat you."

"Please, you're the one that's going to be a sore loser, not me."

"I can't believe you actually beat me? Again!"

Jin turned to you with an exasperated expression, a water gun still in hand, and a balloon unsuccessfully popped. "How are you so good at all these games? It is unfair."

You twirled the water gun in your hand, blowing at the nozzle as if smoke was coming out, “I am just that good. I’ve got that eagle eye.” You dramatically squinted one eye to further your point.

Jin chuckled at your antics, walking alongside you with his arm resting on your shoulders. “Come on Buffalo Bill, let’s go on some rides.”

“Alright, alright,” you gazed around the fair, dodging oblivious kids and frantic parents following after them.

“I want to go on that ride.”

“Oh my god. I thought that I was going to die,” Jin huffed, holding onto your shoulders as he steadied himself. “I am never doing that again.”

You giggled at his declaration. “You were the one that suggested that ride,” you shrugged, “It’s not my fault you couldn’t handle it.” A sly grin plastered on your face seeing his exasperated one.

“I did not suggest this one— YOU dragged me onto it.” Jin’s eyes were wide open, not believing your words.

“I don’t know I think you could have stopped me if you were really that afraid.”

Jin rolled his eyes and gathered himself to take one more deep breath, “Okay y/n,” Jin grabbed your hand, “It’s my turn to pick the next ride.” His eyes set on the Ferris wheel at the back of the fair, unnoticed by you. You fell in step with him, a small genuine smile resting on your face. It has been so long since you felt this at peace. It surprised you that even at the place you cherished most with Taehyung, Jin was able to fill your heart with some happiness. Even as you thought of Taehyung throughout the day, all the thoughts were fond and nostalgic. It was a bittersweet feeling but you were not sad or mourning at the moment.

“Hey y/n? Y/N!” You shook your head, focusing on the large hand waving in front of you. “Huh? Sorry?”

Jin’s concerned face stopped in front of you, “Are you okay?”

Your eyes met his, a content smile on your face, “I actually haven’t been this at ease in a long time. Thank you, Jin.” 

The corner of his mouth pulled as he squeezed your hand, “You’re welcome.”

The two of you stood there, in the middle of the walkway, as people rushed by you. It didn’t matter that someone knocked into your shoulder, grumbling at you to move out of the way. The only thing you cared about right now was how the colorful lights of the surrounding rides and booths reflected into his eyes. It was beautiful and mesmerizing.

Jin was staring at you with equal intensity, lost in the way your eyes crinkled on the ends at you smiled at him. He could not remember the last time he saw that smile and it made him adore you more than he already did.

The two of you could have stayed in your little bubble all night if an especially rude teenager shoved you out of his way. You stumbled into Jin, breaking eye contact with him and with it the spell that you were trapped under.

“Uh– I– Sorry,” you rush out, stepping away from him and releasing his hand. 

Jin cleared his throat, “No, it’s– uhm– all good. Don’t worry about it.” He reached up, rubbing the back of his neck. He hoped you didn’t notice the extreme blush he knew he was sporting on his neck and ears. The first awkward silence that night fell between you.

“Anyway…” you tried to break the silence, “What do you want to do now?”

An uncharacteristic nervous smile appeared on Jin’s face, “I know it’s cliché or whatever but how about the Ferris wheel? We don’t have much time left before the fair shuts down for the night. Plus, I think the view of the city must be really pretty at night.” 

Without much of a second of hesitation, you were grabbing Jin’s hand again and dragging him towards the Ferris wheel. It made you nervous, like when you first realized you were at the fair, but you wanted desperately to push past it. You were here with Jin, not Taehyung. It didn’t matter if the Ferris wheel is where you and Tae shared your first kiss at the top like you were in a romantic comedy. Jin was here, not Taehyung.

The two of you remained silent; while waiting in line, while handing your tickets to the attendant, while sitting in the carriage, so close that your shoulders and knees knocked together. It was completely silent between the two of you until you reached the top. Your eyes widened as you took in the beautiful cityscape around you. The twinkling blurry lights of the surrounding buildings reminded you of the stars you longed to see in the sky. It had been hard to see the stars bright enough in the night since moving to the city and you missed them.

“Wow,” you pressed your face against the glass, “You were really not kidding were you, Jin? This is amazing. I can’t believe I haven’t seen the city like this before,” you gushed.

Jin watched as your smile lit up, his heart warmed at the sight of you so happy.

“Hey y/n? I am really proud of you.”

The softness of Jin’s voice pulled you away from the window to look back at him. Your heart clenched at the adoration you saw in his expression. You turned fully back towards him, taking his hands in your lap, silently urging him to continue. “I just want you to know that I am so proud of you. You have been through so much in the past year or so, and here you are—” he tightened his hands around yours, “getting all happy at the sight of city lights like your heart isn’t weighed down anymore. I know you’re nowhere close to being totally okay if you’ll ever be totally okay, but seeing you right now, happy, makes me so proud of you.”

You watched as Jin’s eyes glistened at his confession. Trailing your gaze back to your conjoined hands, you laced your fingers together. “Well…that’s because of you, Jin.” You brought your eyes back to his, your own tears threatening to spill. “You have helped me so much. Without you, I’d probably still be wasting away in my apartment, eating enough to barely survive.”

You hiccupped, smiling through the few tears that did escape, “You brought the life back into me. I’ll never be able to repay you. I am so grateful you are my friend.”

The two of you were so caught in your own emotions that you didn’t even notice how close you two had gotten; your thighs pressed against his, shoulders grazing each other, his warm breath fanning over your face. For the second time that night, you stared into his eyes, mesmerized by the reflecting lights in them. Before you realize it, Jin starts to lean in and so do you.

Your eyes fluttered shut, waiting for the feel of Jin’s lips on yours when what you felt was like two bricks of ice on your shoulders yanked you back.

You leaned back on your hands, eyes wide as you looked at Jin, who was staring back at you like he couldn’t believe what almost happened. You tried to control your breathing as you asked yourself: What was that?

“I– I’m sorry, y/n. I didn’t mean—” Jin cut himself off, tearing his gaze away from you, “I’m sorry.”

The ride lurched forward, propelling the carriage down, ending your time on the ride with Jin. He mumbled how he was sorry again, offering to take you back home right now. You nodded, not knowing what else you could say at that moment. You were still reeling, trying to figure out if you were crazy or not. It definitely felt as if someone grabbed you but obviously no one else was there? Right?

The two of you headed towards the exit, the crowds already thinning because of how late it was. You trailed behind Jin, not daring to fall in step next to him like earlier in the day. The car ride back was bathed in awkward silence. It had never been this uncomfortable being with Jin, even when he first came back into your life. The only words leaving his mouth was a whisper of goodnight as he left you at the front door of your apartment.

You wished you said something, anything that would bring back the ease you felt with him but you didn’t have the words. You were unable to reassure him that it wasn’t his fault because you didn’t know whose fault it was. Your mind was racing; was it the same thing as the cold breeze you always felt? It felt much more intense than you ever remember it feeling.

All you knew is that as you sat on your kitchen floor, the same position as you cried yourself asleep not too long ago, longing for someone other than Taehyung, wishing the night had ended differently.

~

Taehyung's glare could kill as he watched Jin drop you off at the apartment. Jin had blatantly flirted with you the entire day, at the same place he had done years prior. That was the final straw for him.

When he saw you two on the Ferris wheel, in his spot, leaning towards each other for a kiss, something in him broke. He lunged for you, desperate to stop the kiss before it even happened. He wasn’t thinking straight, he just needed for Jin to get away from you.

The plan worked, if you could even call it a plan, and your little date with Jin came to a crashing end. Taehyung thought it was a success but seeing you sitting there on the ground confused got him thinking again. You knew a comforting presence surrounded you, that much he could tell when you would relax under his touch, but why haven't you connected the dots that it was him? It had been over a year and the desperation he felt months prior was heating up to a boiling point.

He had hugged you, caressed and kissed your face, supported your whole body weight even. He had to do something more. Energy thrummed through his body more so than ever before in all the attempts to get you to recognize him. He felt it in his bones that it would be different tonight.

His eyes snapped to you, hearing you sigh. You willed yourself up, resigning to try and sleep today off, and talk to Jin about everything tomorrow. He deserved to know that the night ended in ruin was not his fault. You were slowly dragging your feet across the floor, heading towards the bathroom, when you felt it. A cool breeze against your neck.

You froze in your spot. Fervent cold kisses pressed against your exposed shoulder, causing you to shudder. There was the phantom touch again, it was comforting like always. It was as if it knew when you needed it. However, this time was different. Accompanying the cold pecks was a buzz of electricity, nothing that shocks you but something that lightly warms you up. You close your eyes, reveling in the touch.

Like similar times before this, you try to remember where the familiar feeling came from. The sensations on your neck slowly became less and less abstract as they start feeling more than just cold spots. The touch formed into something you knew, lips.

You gasp, eyes flying open. Your heartbeat raced as you stared through the open bathroom door at the mirror on the wall. Taehyung.

You couldn’t blink, you couldn’t move a muscle worried that he would disappear at the twitch of a finger. Taehyung, clear as day, was in the mirror attacking your neck with his lips. You shuddered and let out a quiet moan, Tae.

Taehyung immediately stopped, hearing his name. He looked up and your eyes met, the first time you saw his eyes alive since the accident. It seemed as if time stopped as you two stared at each other in the mirror. Your eyes held disbelief while he willed every single emotion he’s had since his death to shine in his gaze. He wanted you to know everything he was feeling because he doubted that he would be able to convey those emotions in words.

Your astonished façade broke, “Taehyung?” you cried out.

He immediately turned you around in his arms and slammed his lips onto yours. Your eyes had screwed shut before turning around in fear he wouldn’t be standing there with you like how you saw in the mirror. The feeling of his hands encasing your wrists felt as real as his lips as they molded against yours. The feeling was euphoric. The crackling of embers burned in the pit of your stomach and the fire grew throughout your body until the cold feeling of his lips was replaced by familiar warmth.

You could not believe this was happening. There was no way this was a dream. It– He felt too real for it to be a dream. All you could do was kiss him back with as much passion as you could muster because you wanted him to know that you still loved him, with everything you had.

The kiss was sloppy as both of you were just desperate to get enough of each other before it was too late. Taehyung let go of your wrists to rest them on the sides of your face, pulling you closer to him. Your hands move to his neck, frantic to touch him as much as you could because he was real, in front of you right now.

The initial spark, the buzz Taehyung felt earlier started to wane. He furrowed his eyebrows, he needs more time. He knew he didn’t have much time left like this, his energy was running low. With great force, he pulled away from your mouth, only to pepper kisses all over your face willing you to remember what they felt like. His body trembled as he pressed one final kiss your forehead and your lips.

And just like that, he vanished, the fire in your body out, like he was blown away with the wind. Your eyes focused straight ahead of you, willing to see him standing in front of you again. Slowly, your fingers grazed your lips. Taehyung. This whole time it was Taehyung. How could you not realize that it was him?

The comfort, the warmth of a fire during a blizzard, the bricks of ice at the fair. It all made sense. It was Taehyung. He didn’t leave you. He never left you.

With that admission hanging in the air, you finally broke down, not with tears of sorrow but tears of joy. He still loved you, you could feel it now, with every caress and every kiss. Relief and excitement ran through your veins as you stood there crying. This could change everything.

Taehyung followed your form as you collapsed onto the bed from exhaustion, not before whispering goodnight to him. He did it. He finally did it. You understood that he never left you, that he still supported and loved you. He should be ecstatic but the smile he wore didn’t reach his eyes.

He didn’t understand. He finally accomplished the goal he had been working towards for a whole year. Something didn’t settle with him and he couldn’t figure it out as he gazed at you in deep sleep. He tried to shake it off and ignore it for now. All he wanted to right now was to lay beside you and bask in your presence because even though you had a nagging feeling in the back of his head he had accomplished his goal. You knew he was around and still loved you, and that was enough for now. 

~

“I am telling you Jin– Taehyung kissed me. I know it was him. I can’t believe I didn’t realize the entire time the ghost was him. How could I have been so dense? But all I know is that Taehyung touched me, kissed me.”

Jin’s eyes widened at the sound of his best friend’s name as the two of you sat silently on a park bench. You had repeatedly called and messaged him, asking to meet up. Now he knew your excitement was about him, it was always about him. Even after over a year, he was still at the forefront of your mind. How was he supposed to compete with someone dead? Would you ever move on? Would you ever think of something more? He thought the day at the fair meant something more to you than just a friendly day out. He wanted it to mean more to you. Was the almost-kiss nothing?

Still, as you gushed over your late fiancé, he couldn’t help the somber smile that settled onto his face. You were smiling and giggling, recounting all the times Taehyung’s ghostly presence comforted you and held you. Your smile was all he really desired. So, he sat back and listened, enjoying the bright light in your eyes as you spoke about the ghost who has haunted you since his death.

“You have to–“

“I believe you,” Jin cut you off, “I haven’t seen you this excited since the day of your engagement.” His smile fell. “What are you going to do about it though? It’s not like Taehyung can actually be here for you in all the ways you need it.”

Taehyung never was the type to resort to violence but the moment your excited rambling ceased at Jin’s words he wanted to punch the shit out of him. He couldn’t follow through with it even if he actually could touch you, because Jin was right.

He wouldn’t be there for you. He wouldn’t be there to whisper sweet nothings into your ear when life got rough. He wouldn’t be there to tell you how proud he was of you when you received a promotion. He was just a ghost. A being that didn’t exist in the physical world. He loved you so much. So much so he forgot the chasm that separated the two of you.

Taehyung foolishly believed that his love could conquer death. How could it? Love stronger than death existed but not in the way in fairytales where he could be magically brought back to life with a spell or a kiss from his true love. There was nothing, no magic spell, no higher power to pray to, that would bring him back, back into your arms.

Taehyung realized at that moment he had to let you go.

It should not have been hard. He died but something kept him here. He always thought it was his love for you that kept him on Earth but maybe, maybe his purpose was to help you move on, not bring back memories and feelings you would never feel again with him.

He needed to let go of the only warmth left in his soul…for you.

Despite you and Jin sitting on a park bench, in a crowded park, in the middle of the city, it was silent. Your mind zeroing in on the words that had just come out of your friend’s mouth. Jin’s question wasn’t unreasonable, all it did was bring reality crashing back into your head. Tae was a ghost, spirit, or whatever energy he manifested. He was no longer alive, no longer a human being walking on the same physical plane as you. No matter how much love there was to try and cheat it.

You gazed into Jin’s eyes. You felt all the concern, all the worry he hid for your sake. “Jin– I–“ You huffed frustrated, casting your eyes downwards to the hands in your lap, “You’re right, you’re right. Even if it was really him there’s no point to hope. What is there to hope for anyway? He’s not going to materialize in front of me if I miss him enough.”

Your hands shot up to cover your face as you tried to hold in a sob. You missed Taehyung so much.

“Hey, hey, I didn’t say that to make you upset. I’m sorry,” Jin gently pried your hands away from your face, holding onto them, and gazed into your teary eyes, “It’s an amazing thing you know? Knowing that there is something after death and he is watching over you.” Jin brought a calloused hand towards your face, brushing away the tears that escaped.

“There is nothing wrong in still loving him, still continuing to love him. He’ll always occupy a part of your heart even as you learn to move on. It’s okay.”

Jin was so close. You could see the glisten of sweat on the bridge of his nose and the bow of his lips from the hot day, the slight furrow of his eyebrows, the flush of his cheeks, the reflection of your eyes in his.

Your heart ached, staring at him. So many familiar emotions bubbled up to the surface. Jin was there when you literally couldn’t leave the bed. Jin was there when you needed a shoulder to cry on, the only one you let see your tears since Taehyung died. Jin was there when you laughed for the first time since the accident, caused by one of his infamous dad jokes. Jin was there the first time you felt Taehyung, the coldest warmth. Jin had been there for you and he was still here listening to you cry about a boy that had been gone for almost two years now. Still here even after you rejected his advance earlier at the fair.

Your eyes flickered to his lips, then back to his eyes, and all at once you realized Jin loved you the same way Taehyung did, in all your grieving mess, he loved you. You cared for Jin too, it wasn’t as strong as love, at least not yet. You wanted to show Jin how much you cared for him.

That’s when you felt it. A cold hand guiding your lips toward his.

The kiss was chaste and quick, you afraid of crossing a line. Shyly looking up at Jin through your eyelashes, you waited for a sign, anything that said he wanted this right now. Jin’s eyes were wide, mouth slightly ajar not believing that you were the one to kiss him first.

“It’s okay,” you whispered against his lips, “I want this.”

“But– you just– you,” Jin stuttered out. He couldn’t believe that this was the same person just 10 minutes ago raving about a phantom kiss from their dead partner.

“I know,” you murmured, face still close to his as your hands rose to rest at the nape of his neck, “I know but it’s you who I want right now.” His eyes locked with yours, the intensity raising the already pounding beat of your heart. You hoped you could convey how sincere you were. It wasn’t love yet but you had intense feelings for Jin, and with Taehyung’s blessing, you wanted Jin’s lips on yours.

“Please…” you sigh, softly brushing your nose against his, desperate to close the small distances between your mouths.

That seemed to be the final push he needed before Jin connected to his lips to yours. Your eyes fluttered shut. The feeling was electric, the buzz spreading from where you two connected filling you up all the way to your toes. Jin reached up; one hand cupping your face, thumb caressing your cheekbone, the other resting on the side of your neck. You pulled him closer to you, deepening the kiss.

Jin’s soft pillowy lips worked hard against yours. The kiss was sweet and careful as if Jin was afraid he was just dreaming and you would run away at any second. Your hands traveled to the nape of his neck, playing with the hair there. The buzz settled and left an intense warm feeling, different from what you felt with Taehyung. It was as if you were swimming in the heat of the sun, while Taehyung’s felt like a comforting fire amid winter.

You couldn’t help the bright smile creep on your face as you kissed Jin back with even more need, hoping he could feel your happiness through your actions. Jin matched your smile, teeth clashing for a moment, relieved that this wasn’t a mistake or a dream.

The two of you broke apart, panting heavily as you caught your breath.

You let your forehead drop against his, closing your eyes. The emotions dancing around in your chest were overwhelming. So many thoughts ran through your head but the one prevailing emotion, that outshined the rest, was euphoria. Nothing could compare to Jin’s kiss except for the familiar elation that you felt when you had your first kiss with Taehyung but that didn’t matter anymore. This was the last time you were going to compare Jin and Taehyung together, the only two men that have captured your heart.

You would sort out your emotions more clearly later, all you wanted right now was to focus on the fast but comforting tempo of Jin’s heartbeat as you cuddled into his chest.

~

It took almost a full year after your first kiss with Jin to make things official. You still had a lot of healing to do and he was ever so patient with you. That fateful kiss helped you realize Jin could be the new happiness, the new light in your life. You had to thank Taehyung for that.

Without his blessing, you were sure you would have never moved on. It brought a bittersweet smile to your face every time you thought about him but as Jin said about a year ago there is nothing wrong in still loving him. You still loved Taehyung, you always would. He owned a part of your heart forever. Loving Jin allowed you to grow, to blossom into something different but still you.

“Babe? Are you almost done in there? We have to leave in the next ten minutes if we don’t want to be late.”

You looked back at Jin through the mirror you faced as you got ready. Tonight was date night and the two of you were traveling outside the city to a drive-in movie theater, where you hoped to see stars in the night sky. You were ecstatic. “Just give me another minute, I am almost done,” you beamed, drying the last section of wet hair, “I refuse to get a cold.”

Jin chuckled, turning away and heading back to the kitchen. You finished drying your hair and stopped to study your reflection in the steamy mirror. The dark circles you thought would be a permanent feature on your face had disappeared, the color in your cheeks was back to their naturally rosy state, the smile on your face was genuine. You looked happy.

Taking a deep breath you turned to head out with Jin when something in the mirror caught your eye. In the still steamy mirror, in the bottom corner, a small shape was drawn. A heart.

You teared up, glancing around the empty bathroom, “I love you too,” you whispered. With one last sweet smile, you finally turned and left the bathroom, calling after Jin.

Taehyung watched from the bathroom as you and Jin wrapped your arms around each other, heading out with soft smiles. A bittersweet feeling ached in his chest. He fulfilled his purpose, his goal ever since you recognized his touch for the first time two and a half years ago. The bright smile was on your face and you were happy. You still loved him and he still loved you, and you knew it still after he couldn’t form the words to say it.

All Taehyung had to do was to wait for the sweet oblivion to take him as you moved on from him. He was ready; happy that you would always love him and remember him. He was ready to fade away, content to live in your loving memory.

~please give me that sweet good feedback, i’d really appreciate it~

#bts taehyung x reader #bts seokjin x reader #btsghostie #btsghostiebingo #taehyung x reader #seokjin x reader #bts fanfic #bts ghost au #kth #ksj #bts oneshot #bts angst

[bangtanloverboys]

i’d be home with you // knj

summary - death is inevitable, it’s something you cannot escape. it only hurts more when it you die too young.

pairing - ghost!namjoon x female! reader

genre - angst, hurt/comfort; ghost au

word count - 7.7k

warnings - peer pressure, drugs, alcohol consumption, anxiety attack, major character deaths (duh), police, accidental deaths, crying, vomiting, drinking as a coping mechanism, communicating with the dead, psychics, moving on, acceptance of death 

author’s note - this is for the final tile in my bingo ‘ghost au’. this really hurt me writing it and im sad, but i hope you guys like it

Namjoon had a lot of regrets, despite living a fairly cautious lifestyle. But since he died all he had left was regretting stuff he didn’t get to do sooner. Dying at 23 via accidental overdose? Hell of a way to die when he was someone who struggled to even tell a waiter that they gave him the wrong order, but that’s how he met his end. 

There were so many things he didn’t get to experience: getting his Masters, graduating college, finding the love of his life, having children with said love of his life, growing old, retiring, spending time with grandkids if he had any. But all of that was cut short by just one single party and one single decision.

His brother, Seokjin, dragged him along to one of his dumb frat parties. All Namjoon wanted to do that evening was just study for his anthropology final that was coming up the following weekend but in his brother’s terms he needed to quote-unquote “Take a chill pill”. He dragged him over to some random townhouse a couple miles away from the university, handed him a cup of alcohol and abandoned him. 

Namjoon didn’t drink, just didn’t think it was all that appealing to him. He sat silently in the corner of the room, keeping himself flush to the wall. He pretended to sip the plastic cup that was in his hand, trying not to draw any attention to himself whatsoever. It wasn’t until he was approached by a young brown haired man that his fate was sealed. 

“‘Sup man, you look like you need a bit of fun.” The man said, a small smirk on his lips as he raised a small baggie of white pills. 

“I- uh, I’m good. Thanks.” Namjoon quickly panicked, turning him down and quickly started looking around for his brother. This wasn’t his scene. He just wanted to go home now.

“Nah, come on man! You look like you need a bit of destressing, just take a couple. On the house.” He watched in abject horror as the guy opened the maggie and poured some into his hand. He took Namjoon’s free hand and put the pills in his palm. “Go on! Feels great.” He winked at him as he leaned against a wall, waiting for him to take the drugs. 

Despite only the stranger’s gaze on him, he felt like everyone at the party was staring at him. Waiting for him to take the pills. His heart was pounding, he should give them back and just walk home. With or without Seokjin. Instead he found himself slowly lifting the pills to his mouth, throwing them in and taking a swig of the cup in his hand to wash it down. The alcohol was bitter on his tongue and they clumped together as they went down his esophagus. 

“Yeaah man!” With a heart shaped smile, the man slapped him on the shoulder, “Enjoy it man. See me if you need anymore later.” And with that, he disappeared into the crowd.

Namjoon just stood there, head pounding as the lights bleared his vision and he swear he could feel the floors vibrate beneath his feet with the base of the stereo. Despite him not even moving, he felt like he was spinning and hanging upside down. Was it getting hot in here? Why did his limbs feel cold? He pushed himself from the wall, pushing his way through the sea of people between him and the way out. 

“Heyyy!! Joonie! Get over here!” The voice of his brother called out to him, he turned to see the man himself walk over to him and pull him out of the crowd. “I see you were gettin’ jiggy, eh? Finally letting loose?”

“Jin, I-I don’t feel so good. I need-”

“Oh quit it Namjoon!” Seokjin scoffed at him. “Just take another drink and chillax!” He took the cup in his hand and brought it to Namjoon’s lips, forcing him to gulp down more of the burning liquid. 

With that, his brother walked away. He felt himself get sucked back into the crowd of dancers, pushing and pulling him in all directions. His heartbeat was in his head, the base of the music was in his stomach. His chest was tight and he felt like he couldn’t breathe. All he knew at this point was the people he was surrounded by. Dancing, screaming, singing. It was loud and hot and nauseating. Yet despite the heat of the bodies around him, he felt cold. All he knew was what was in that crowd of people: sweat, heat, and constant movement.

After that the world just seemed to turn black.

He woke up the next early morning to sirens; red and blue lights flashing outside the windows. That should’ve been his first clue. His second clue should’ve been the lack of a hangover he should be having. Namjoon walked down the hallway he was in and into the living room where a couple he didn’t know were talking to police, alongside a few other party goers were all sitting on the couch. 

“H-hey what’s going on?” He asked as he approached them, but he was ignored. “Um, hello?” He waved his hand, trying to catch their attention. He felt his chest tighten, what was going on? Why were they ignoring him? When he heard an officer call out for a Mr. Kim, he almost cried from relief, “That’s me!”

But the officer walked right past him and out onto the porch, where a young man sat with a blanket laid over his shoulders. “Mr. Kim, I’m sorry to bug you at this time but we need a statement.” The man said to him. The young man nodded and stood up to face the officer. To Namjoon’s horror it was Seokjin, his eyes red and puffy. He’d never seen his brother look so distraught. “Are you alright for me to ask you a few questions?”

“Yeah,” his voice croaked out. 

“Did Namjoon, or anyone else in your family, have a history of drug abuse?” The question threw him for a loop.

“No!” He yelled at the officer. “I have never-”

“No, he-” Jin cut him off with a sniffle. “He’s never used drugs before, I dragged him out to this party. And-and it’s my fault he’s dead.” 

Namjoon’s entire world seemed to collapse in on itself. “What?! I’m not dead! I’m right here! Seokjin! Seokjin, look at me!” He cried out as he tried to push past the threshold of the door but some invisible force kept him in. “Seokjinnie, please! Hyung!” He screamed as he watched the officer place a hand on his shoulder as his older brother sobbed. 

He looked ahead of them and saw a white van labeled ‘CORNOR’ just shut its doors, only giving him a split second to see the tell-tale black body bag inside before the other door shut.

At that moment, another officer walked out the front door. Walking right through him. He watched as the man visibly shuddered before talking to the officer about giving Seokjin more time before asking questions. The air left his lungs, not that he had any in there to begin with. He clutched his chest and ran. He ran through the walls of the town house towards the back door, only for the same thing to happen at the front door happen again. An invisible barrier holding him in. 

He needed to be in an enclosed space. Glancing around, he saw an open closet tucked beneath the small staircase to the master bedroom. Namjoon burst into another run and slammed the door of the closet shut and let out an ungodly scream; crying out for his mother, brother, someone, anyone to hear him and tell him it was going to be okay. The only person came was an officer to investigate the slam but no one else came. No one saw him. 

He died August 28th, 1994. He was 23 years old. Cause of death was drug induced heart attack. The pills the stranger gave him were part of a bad batch or laced with something else, at least that’s what the owner’s of the house mentioned when he listened in on their conversations. At first he felt bad about it, but he couldn’t leave the townhouse so what else could he do? Watch paint dry?

After a while the frat guys who lived in the house moved out, not feeling comfortable with knowing that a guy died in their hallway on their watch. Namjoon didn’t hold any ill will towards them. It wasn’t their fault. Hell, he was such a forgiving person, he wasn’t even that mad at the guy who gave him the drugs. So he didn’t know exactly why he was stuck here, in a small townhouse. But there he was. And he tried his best to deal with it. 

While it certainly did suck the first few months of just trying to deal with people walking through him and not being able to be heard; being dead wasn’t so bad when Namjoon thought about it. It did get a bit lonely sometimes, not being able to talk to anyone outside of his own half conversations with the tenants that moved into the townhouse.

Sometimes the tenants of the house figured out that the place was haunted; sometimes they’d bring in psychics, who were definitely fake as no matter how much he tried to tell them he was a nice ghost they always spouted some bullshit of a vengeful spirit. Sometimes they’d bring in their own ghost equipment and start talking, but soon as he got a word out they freaked and left. The place was constantly on and off the market until you. 

You were a plucky university student who finally found a place that had low enough rent and was close enough to your school that you didn’t need a roommate. Despite Jungkook’s and Taehyung’s begging, you wanted a place to yourself and finding a 2 bedroom townhouse with rent that cheap? It was a steal! With the help of your two friends plus your older brother Yoongi, you were able to get all your stuff moved in within the day!

You didn’t understand why the place never had steady tenants; sure there was a history of noises and cold spots, but it was an old house built in the 70s. Of course it’s gonna have some old stuff that needs fixing. 

Namjoon watched in silence as the four of you went in and out of the house. A few times you did walk near him and visibly shiver, your friends even mentioned the cold spots to you, but you waved it off as if it was nothing. “Just the heater, I’ll talk to the landlord. See if he can do anything about it.” Now he wasn’t an engineer or anything, but he’s seen the heater and there’s nothing wrong with it, it was definitely him you were feeling. But he just had hopes that whoever the landlord hired would say the same to you. 

He was quickly able to get a quick gage on your friends; the brown haired one being Jungkook, he could easily tell he was the youngest of the group by how the rest of you babied him. The blue haired one was Taehyung, but there was something about him that was familiar almost. He reminded him of his brother, how handsome he was. Lastly the dark haired man was Yoongi, at first he wasn’t sure about your relationship to him, seeing how he was the oldest out of all of you, but he quickly came to realize you were siblings by the way you teased each other. He found a lot of joy watching the four of you bicker and talk as you all set up certain aspects of your new place.

“Are you sure you don’t want a roommate?” Jungkook whined as he brought in the last of the boxes. “I swear, I’ll do all the laundry and chores just pleaaasee?”

“Sorry, Jungkookie.” You laughed at your friend. “But the lease is signed and I got everything I want planned out already. You can go room with Taehyung!”

“But he gets paint all over my shit though!” He groaned as he set the last box down on the counter. 

“Hey, if she says she’s okay for her own place I believe her.” Yoongi said as he left your room. “Your bed is all set up by the way.” He pressed a kiss to the crown of your head. 

“Thank you, Yoongle.” You smile at your older brother, happy he was able to get your bed together before it was too late in the day. “Now I just gotta find my sheets and I’ll be able to sleep in bed.” You chuckled.

“Which are right here,” You turn to see Taehyung holding a bag full of your blankets and pillows. “Want me to bring them over to your room?” He tossed his head in the direction of where you claimed your bedroom would be.

“Please and thank you!” You gave him a wide smile as he made his way down towards your room to drop them. 

“You sure you don’t want me to spend the night tonight?” Yoongi asked, “First nights are scary, believe me.”

“I’ll be fine! Don’t worry!”

And you were. You thought you’d have a bit of difficulty adjusting to being alone, but for some reason you didn’t really feel alone? If that made any sense. You’d think after living with your brother the past few years you’d instantly notice being alone. Physically you knew you were but at the same time, deep down you knew you weren’t. Whatever this feeling was, you didn’t mind it. Hell, the weird feeling comforted you. Helped you prove to your brother that you didn’t need any extra help. 

Namjoon was kinda baffled at how willfully ignorant you were. It’s been a few weeks since you’ve moved in and he notices you do tend to lose stuff and don’t really question it when he suddenly places it where you can easily find it again. He likes watching you get ready and organizing your place. (Of course, when he sees that you’re getting dressed or getting ready for bed he’ll give you your privacy.) Sometimes he’ll kinda give some ghosty help and straighten up some of the crooked frames you hung up. Being the friendly ghost roommate he is. 

You called the landlord not too long ago and he said that a lot of the past tenants had complained about it not working or it always being cold in the house so he told you he was just going to replace it. You were excited! Brand new heater! And with the nights starting to get colder, you’re really going to need it. 

It was on a Tuesday when the landlord came to change the heater, which was strange. Namjoon watched as you let the landlord in to work as you left for your early morning class, now the few times he’s seen the landlord and stuff being fixed is few. Normally he’ll have a professional come over and work on it, that’s what happened a few years ago when he accidentally shoved a spoon down the kitchen drain and the tenant called his services. 

He watched with curiosity as the landlord dragged in the brand new heater, box in all, as well as his tool box and got to work. Something in the back of Namjoon’s mind didn’t feel right, so he kept an eye on the man as he installed the heater himself. Again, he wasn’t an electrician and knew nothing of installing heaters, but he knew that he was doing it wrong. He was pushing and slamming against it, trying to get it to fit on the pipes. Namjoon anxiously ran his fingers through his hair, debating on trying to fuck with him and push the heater off. But before he could even do anything, you came home and the landlord dusted off his hands and closed the door to the heater. 

You were so happy that it was finished, thanking the landlord profusely for getting you a new one and installing it. While it was gonna take a bit off of your deposit, and you were internally cringing at that, you knew it was a well needed thing to be done. Soon as he left, you turned on the heat, as it was a cool November day and your professor didn’t bother turning on the heat in her class at all. With the heat on, you grabbed some blankets and snuggled up to watch Netflix the rest of the day, not bothering to work on your essay that was due in a few days. 

As the day slowly came to a close, you realized you were getting a small headache. You didn’t really think much of it, just popped an aleve and drank some water. Usual things that helped cure your headaches, but it didn’t seem to let up. You glanced at the time, it was about 7:30. “Might as well hit the hay early.” You yawned, stretching out and made your way to your room. You did stumble around a bit, damn did you not notice how tired you were? Not bothering to change out of your day clothes, you just crawled right into bed and fell asleep. 

“Not good, this is very not good.” Namjoon was rightfully freaking out. The heater was not properly installed at all and as he couldn’t breathe, he knew that whatever was happening to you was not good. He scoured all over the house, looking for some sort of alarm he could set off, wake you up, get you out of the house. As it turns out, the fire alarm was busted. The landlord was too cheap to fix it and not bother telling you. He constantly went back and forth checking on your to make sure your chest was still rising and falling as he frantically tried to do anything to wake you up. 

Nothing worked though. He hadn’t felt this frustrated since he first died and everyone was walking through him. He wanted to scream, but nothing worked. He couldn’t do much but watch you. Wait for you to wake up and realize something was wrong. Wait for you to die. Which ever happened first and he hoped it was the former. But no matter how much he hoped and prayed to whatever god there was out there, it was fruitless. 

It was 1:36 am when you stopped breathing.

Namjoon lets out a choked out sob, he can’t believe it. He should’ve done something. He should’ve pushed the heater over while the landlord was still here. He should’ve done something to turn it off before you started suffering from the carbon monoxide that was pouring through your vents. He buried his head in his hands and he just cried. Cried for you, for your family. You had so much life ahead. 

“Mmhmm, what’s going on?”

He stilled, he looked up and saw you on the floor, holding your head. He quickly glanced between you and your body and quickly jumped into action. 

“Hey, it’s okay.” He got on his knees to help you to your feet, thankfully in your confusion you let him help you up and quickly escorted you away from your room. He wasn’t sure how you were going to react to the fact you had died, much less seeing your own dead body right in front of you. “Just follow me, you’re going to be okay.” He said as he brought you over to the couch and sat you down. 

“Hmm, who are you? Where am I?” You were still very dazed, he wasn’t sure if that was just a side effect of the poisoning or just general confusion of death. Did different deaths affect ghosts differently? Or was it random to each person? 

“My name is Namjoon, we’re in your house.” He answered as he knelt in front of you.

Your eyes slowly started focusing on him and when your vision cleared to see the stranger in your house, you rightfully screamed. “Who the fuck are you!? What are you doing in my house?!” You shouted scrambling to get away from him. “Get out before I call the police!!”

“Hey hey hey, wait!” He called out after you as you got to your feet and ran back to your room. “Don’t go in there! Wait! Y/N!”

Soon as you crossed the threshold of the room you screamed again. Because there you were, in bed. Not moving. Not breathing. You fell to your knees and screamed again; in horror, confusion, fear. You felt a hand on your shoulder and you just leaned into it, collapsing into the arms of a complete stranger. 

Namjoon held you as you sobbed into him, fists tight around the shirt he died in. He tried his best to be a soothing presence for you, rubbing circles into your back and not letting you go until several hours had passed. A normal human being probably would’ve passed out from exhaustion by now, but you weren’t human anymore. You were a ghost. 

By the time you had stopped crying the sun was starting to rise, you let Namjoon help you to your feet and back to the living room. You both sat down on the couch in silence, besides a couple of sniffles from you. 

“Are. . are you the Grim Reaper?” You asked, your voice groggy from crying. 

“Hm? Oh no, I uh, I’m a ghost. Like you actually.” He replied with a nervous chuckle. “I died here.”

“I figured,” you wiped your nose on the back of your hand. “Landlord said someone died back in ’94, I just thought it was some. . .some old guy. Old age. Didn’t think he’d be-you’d be close to my age.”

“How old are you?” He asked, trying to make light conversation and distract you. 

“Uh, I turned 21 last month.” You gave him a tight smile. Then the two of you fell into silence.

“I’m 23, by the way.” God, it’s been so long since he’s had an actual conversation with someone that he completely forgot how to talk to people. 

“But wouldn’t you be-”

“Nah I don’t really count the years afterward much. I don’t age and can’t leave the house, what’s the point in counting the years.” He scratched the back of his neck. 

“Can’t leave? What do you mean?” You looked at him, confused. 

“Uh. . . you saw Beetlejuice right?” You nodded. “Kinda like that? Only instead of being teleported to some other sand dimension, you just get. . .blocked.”

“I guess there’s also no ‘Handbook for the Recently Deceased’ either.” You let out a soft chuckle.

“Yeah, that would’ve been very helpful.” He gave you a small, dimpled smile. Then the silence fell over you again, the only noise was the shudder of the heater as it shut off, then there was complete silence.

“How long?” You keep your gaze focused on your lap, pulling on your fingers. 

“Hmm?”

“How long. . .are we going to be here?” Your body was still in the other room, how long until someone notices you were missing school? How long would it take your brother to know that you weren’t contacting him? You could go days without talking with him. . .

“Here? I don’t know. . . as for someone to notice. . .that all depends on the people around you. I died when there was just a frat party, so it was noticed immediately. . .”

You furrowed your brows at that, it sounded familiar. . .why did that sound familiar? You knew for a fact you didn’t research the one death in this house, but at the same time you feel like you’ve been told a story like that before. . . 

It was Jungkook who found you a day and a half later. 

“Y/N? Hello?” He was banging on the door, looking in between the windows. Namjoon held you close as you started to cry, you didn’t want Jungkook to see this. He shouldn’t have to see this. He must’ve found the hide-a-key because moments later he was in, you clung tighter onto Namjoon as your best friend of 10 years looked past you. 

“Y/N?” He called out as he walked in, you turned your head into Namjoon’s chest as your friend made his way towards your room. You squeezed your eyes shut as you heard him talk. “Hey you okay? Haven’t seen you at school. . . Y/N? Y/N? Hey wake up-” He must’ve realized because next thing you know he’s running out of the house, right through you and Namjoon, he stumbles outside and onto the small patch of grass that is your lawn. 

You pull yourself away from Namjoon’s grip, throwing yourself to the open door where you see Jungkook throwing up whatever's in his stomach and crying. You wanted to burst out of the house and just hold him, tell him you were okay, tell him you loved him one last time. But you couldn’t, all you could do was stand there and watch as he pulled out his phone and dialed the emergency number.

Soon enough there was a fire track, an ambulance, and several police cars lining the street. Namjoon tried to pull you away so you didn’t have to see what was going on, but you refused. You needed to see, you had to know what was going on. What was going to happen. BUt all those thoughts were thrown out the door when you saw your brother frantically pull up and run towards the house, pushing past officers trying to keep him away from the scene.

“Y/N?!” he screamed as the officers continued to hold him back. “Where’s my sister!? Is she okay?! Y/N!!” 

“Yoongi! Yoongi I’m right here!” You screamed, banging against the force that confined you to the townhouse. Not caring if first responders walked right through you, you didn’t care. You just wanted your brother. 

“Yoongi,” You saw Jungkook walk over to him, tears still falling from his face. You watched as the realization fell on his face. You were gone. 

“No. No no no no no NO!” He clawed hysterically at the officers, begging and screaming at them to let him go. They only did as he fell to his knees, Jungkook right next to him and pulled him in close. Both of them crying their hearts out for you as people watched from beyond the police tape. 

With the way your heater was improperly placed, it was an easy open and shut case. Carbon monoxide poisoning. Manslaughter. Your landlord was arrested and charged, plead guilty. He’ll get 3 years in prison. But that does little to resolve you or your family's grief. 

It takes a while before your family has access to your house again, all the carbon monoxide cleared out from the space. The new landlady gives Yoongi a month to clear out your stuff. You watch there as your mom, dad, Yoongi, Jungkook, and Taehyung all stop by and help try and organize boxes. No tears are spared through the entire time, from them and your family. 

Namjoon feels a bit awkward, staying off in the corner as you sit next to your mom as she folds all your clothes and puts them into boxes. He listens to your family as they tell stories about you, reminiscing on memories. He keeps a close eye on your though, despite him dying before, he never saw his family mourn. He’s unsure how you might deal with seeing them cry and divide up your stuff. 

You only start to lose it when Yoongi finds the pink stuffed elephant he’d given you many years ago, hiding away amongst your pillows. When he pulls out the stuffed animal that was hidden away, you watched as he ran his thumb over the furry creature. He brought it close to his chest and let out a choked out sob. Unsure how much more you were able to take, you let out a scream.

Namjoon quickly ran over to the bedroom where you were on the floor, screaming and crying as Yoongi stood there crying, completely unaware of what was going on before him. “Hey hey, it’s okay. It’s okay.” He tried to calm you, but you weren’t having it.

“No! It’s not okay, Namjoon! I’m dead! Maybe you’d have time to accept things the way they were but I can’t!” You shouted, pushing him away from you. You let out another twisted scream that turned into a sob, shaking Namjoon to his very core. The amount of power and energy you put into that wail shook the bookcase behind you, a few of the books falling from their shelves. The man just sat there across from you as you curled into a ball and just cried, and cried, and cried. Not sure what else to say. What do you say to a girl who was wrongfully killed in her sleep? There’s nothing. 

So caught up in your emotions and trying to keep you calm, neither of you see Yoongi notice stare at the bookcase and the fallen books. 

The next few times your family and friends come to pack things up, Namjoon stays with you in the closet. Saying something about giving them space and you need space as well. At first you protest against it, not wanting to be confined to an even smaller space. But after watching your father tear up as he packed away your photos, you agreed. You couldn’t take much longer. 

Several days had passed and all that was left in your townhouse was just the furniture. Your parents and brother arguing over who could keep what. There’s still a few boxes of your things scattered around the house, you wish you could steal a book or something to keep yourself occupied at least but you’d know they’d notice and find it right away. 

Lightning cracks against the sky as rain pours down. To pass the time, Namjoon was telling you stories about the other tenants that had lived here; the frat boys, the families, the stoners, etc. You were in the middle of telling him a story about how you and Jungkook met Taehyung, how he at 17 years old stuck a bug up his nose on a dare when the front door slammed open. Lightning flashed behind the figure, giving you a quick outline of your brother with a bottle in his hand.

“Oh on, no no no.” You stood up to walk over to Yoongi but he just walked right through you. Soaked from the rain, he probably didn’t even feel the cold spot that was you. 

“What is it? What’s wrong?” Namjoon asked as your brother dropped his bag on the floor, taking another swig of the whiskey in his hand. 

“Yoongi, he-he doesn’t like drinking. . .he only does when. . .” Your voice trailed off. Hurt is evident in your eyes as he places the alcohol on the ground and shuffles around in his backpack. Pulling out a black box and frantically tore it open, pulling out a small speaker and wires. 

“Come on, turn on you. . stupid fuckin’ thing.” He slurred as he pushed several buttons on the speaker until it blarred to life, a loud buzzing noise filling the living room. “Y/N? Are you there?”

Your eyes felt like they were going to bulge out of your head. Never in your life did you think your brother would go to such lengths as to buy a spirit box?! You looked to Namjoon, unsure of what to do. He’s told you a couple times people figured out the place was haunted and they’d try to communicate with him, but this was different. He was looking for you. He only gestured for you to speak. 

“Yoongi?” Soon as the words left your mouth, a robotic voice left the speakers and you swear he jumped ten feet in the air. 

“Is-is it really you?” He clung to the speaker, bringing it closer to his face. 

“It’s me,” you said. “I’m here.” The robotic voice followed after your’s. Yoongi let out a small cry, relieved you were here. You tried to say more but all that came out was garbled and mixed up. “Namjoon! What do I do?!”

“Calm down, small phrases.” Namjoon said, the spirit box picked up on his voice, repeating him as well. 

“Y/N, are we alone?” Your brother stilled, looking around the room. 

“No, someone else.” You said, sticking to the advice of small words and phrases. 

“Who?”

“Namjoon, friend.” The man introduced himself. “Died here too.”

“This is. . .this is great? I think? Y/N, I- I don’t know what to say. I’m sorry.” His eyes welded up with tears as he spoke.

“It’s. . okay.” You slowly made your way over to your brother, you placed your hand right over his cheek. “I love you.”

You weren’t sure if he felt your presence or not but needless to say he shut off the machine and burst into tears, you cried as he cried. He sat down on the couch, taking a few more swigs of his bottle of whiskey. His cries eventually evolved into snores as he passed out. You could feel Namjoon’s eyes on you as you attempted to brush the hair from his eyes. 

“I’m glad he didn’t do anything too stupid,” you sighed as you stood. “Or dangerous.”

“I’m sorry this happened, Y/N.” Namjoon said, as you made your way back over to him. Both of you just stand there, staring at your sleeping brother. 

“Not your fault,” you responded. “Just, god, I hope someone takes care of him. . .”

“You have a very loving and caring family, Y/N. He’ll be okay,” he wrapped an arm over your shoulder and pulled you into him. As time passed, you’ve gotten somewhat closer. You can’t help but be friendly with him as he’s the only other person you have, being stuck in a 2 bedroom, 1 and a half bath townhouse for the rest of eternity.

When Yoongi woke up the next morning he was grumpy, per usual of him drinking. He didn’t touch the spirit box though. Didn’t even look at it. He just shoved it in his backpack and left, leaving the whiskey behind. You’re glad he left it behind, but at the same time neither of you don’t know what to do with it. 

Namjoon tried to teach you to harness some of your energy to move stuff, him having several years under his belt. He’s able to move things around with little to no struggle, seeing how he was able to move your stuff around before. You however, struggle to move it even a centimeter. But he tells you not to worry, saying it did take him several years to master. 

About a week after your brother came by there’s a small crowd of people outside the door. Before you can even warn Namjoon, the door opens up and reveals him, Jungkook, Taehyung, a short blond man you don’t recognize, and-

“Seokin?!” Namjoon almost instantaneously recognized his brother, only he looked. . .older.

“You know him?” You almost had eyes as wide as he does, staring at him as he moves with the group of people into the kitchen. 

“Yeah, he’s-he’s my brother.” He feels tears start to well up, stinging as he blinks them back. 

“Your. . that would make you-”

“Taehyung, what am I doing here? You haven’t told me anything.” The eldest man complained as he settled into a chair.

“Dad, I told you just. . .just listen. Please.” Your blue haired friend sighed, giving his dad’s hand a quick squeeze. 

You can only stare at Namjoon who in turn only stares at Taehyung and his father. That’s why his story sounded familiar. You vaguely remember hearing your friend’s dad say something about having a brother that died young. An accident. At a house. Your house. 

The group of people settled around the table, only one left standing was the blond stranger who kept his eyes closed as he took a few deep breaths. His face was scrunched up every so slightly, like he was feeling for something.

“Oh no,” Namjoon groaned. “They brought a psychic.”

“I feel. . .” He started.

“Watch he’s going to say vengeful or something like that,” your ghostly friend crossed his arms with a huff.

“Oh I feel a lot of different things,” he giggled as he opened his eyes, pressing a hand to his cheek. “Mainly confusion but. . .there’s some relief and happiness mainly surrounding you sir.” The psychic pointed to Seokjin, who looked even more confused. 

“Are they here?” Yoongi asked him as he settled down in his seat.

“Yes, your sister and your brother are in the room.” he said with a smile. 

“I’m sorry, what?” Seokjin raised a brow in disbelief. “No, Taehyung. I’m not going to deal with some phony who is going to just make shit up about my brother” He started to get up from his seat. 

“Dad, wait!” Taehyung called after him.

“Pink! He likes the color pink!”

“Does the color pink mean anything to you?” The psychic said, stilling Seokjin. 

“Pink was his favorite color, but to anyone who asked him what his favorite color was it was orange.” Namjoon just spouted off the fact about his brother. The psychic didn’t repeat the statement verbatim, but got the point across nonetheless. 

“Mr. Kim, please just listen to what Jimin has to say. True me.” Your brother pleaded with him. Seokjin walked back to the table and took his seat once again. You could see his eyes were watering, like his brother he was blinking back tears. 

“Continue.” He gave a small nod to the blond man, now known as Jimin, who smiled back in return. 

“Now, we’re here to talk to Y/N and Namjoon, correct. That’s their names.” The table all nodded in response. “Okay, they’re here. They’re a bit confused so I’ll repeat my briefing. Hello, my name is Park Jimin. I’m a psychic medium. I can’t exactly see or hear you, but I can feel your energy and emotions. So please be gentle.” He gave a small laugh as he settled himself in your kitchen chair and closed his eyes. “Your family has questions, I’m here to help translate your answers for you. Family, if you please.”

“If Y/N is really here. . . what’s something only she and I would know?” Jungkook said, you had a feeling he was suspicious of this as well, just more quiet about it, possibly not wanting to insult Yoongi or Jimin. 

You felt your cheeks burn as a memory popped in your head, immediately knowing exactly what proof he needed. “He uh, stole my first kiss when I was 13 underneath the monkey bars.” You let out a small chuckle at the memory.

Almost instantaneously, Jimin burst out in a giggle. “Oh my gosh, I’m getting monkey bars?” He kept his eyes closed as he brought his hands to his cheeks. You were keeping your eyes focused on the psychic, but out of the corner of your eyes you saw Jungkook stiffen. “Oh my face is red. You stole her first kiss.” He opened his eyes, a huge smile on his face. 

“I’m sorry what?” Yoongi immediately turned to the younger boy, eyeing him suspiciously. 

“Shush, it’s her.” He dismissed your brother as he leaned forward on the table, soaking in every word that Jimin said. 

“Dad, do you want to say something?” Taehyung looked to his father who kept his arms crossed and his face stern. Glancing between him and Namjoon as he stood right next to him, you finally were able to see somewhat of a resemblance between them. The same messy dark hair, same stern eyebrows, you could only imagine what Mr. Kim looked like when he was Namjoon’s age. 

“. . . Who was it. . .” His voice cracked as he spoke. 

Namjoon paused, he hadn’t thought of the stranger in many years. . .did they never find him? All he recalls of him was a heart shaped smile and brown hair. He can’t recall much else about him, looking very much normal. Like the rest of the party. 

“Hmm,” He watched as Jimin’s face scrunched up a bit. “He doesn’t know, all he remembers is the smile and his hair color.” He brought his hand to his mouth, gesturing to it. “It was a very specific shape too, I see it in my mind perfectly. I wanna say. . . heart shaped?”

Soon as the words left his mouth, Seokjin broke out into a sob. Namjoon watched as his son, his nephew, rumbed comforting circles on his back. 

“Hoseok, fucking Jung Hoseok.” He choked out, hiding his face from the rest of the table. 

Namjoon reached out to his brother, placing a hand on his shoulder. Trying to let him know that it’s okay, he’s not mad. It’s okay. 

“Seokjin,” Jimin started. “Your brother doesn’t harbor any ill will towards him. He forgave him a long time ago.” He finished with a smile. 

“But it’s my fault he’s dead.” He managed to get out. “I brought him to the party, I gave him alcohol. I was the one complaining to Hoseok about him needing to chill out. I caused my brother’s death!”

Namjoon froze at this information. He looked to you, who seemed equally stunned. The whole table seemed to be stunned into silence. 

“I thought it was him for a while, but no one saw him give Namjoon the drugs. I had no evidence. Hoseok’s dad was chief of police so even if I did it would’ve been swept under the rug.” Seokjin finished as he wiped his tears away. The entire table stayed quiet, waiting. 

Namjoon closed his eyes and took a deep breath, despite the action doing nothing, it calmed him down. “It’s alright, Jinnie. I forgive you.” He focused all his energy onto his hand that was placed on his brother’s shoulder, giving it a squeeze. “You need to forgive yourself.” He must’ve felt it because he started staring at his shoulder.

“He forgives you, Mr. Kim.” Jimin repeated softly. “But he thinks you need to forgive yourself. You can’t change the past. He learned that a long time ago. It’s time to let go.”

Eyes not leaving his shoulder, he nodded. “Okay. Okay Joonie.” He let out in a soft voice. 

Jimin conducts the meeting for a little while longer, your respective families letting you know that you are always in their thoughts and how much they love you. You and Namjoon stayed near each other the whole time, giving each other the support you needed as you all reminisced on memories. 

As the meeting  started to come to a close, the blond psychic said something. “Now, this is not usually conventional for me but I feel like it’s necessary.” 

“What do you mean?” Yoongi asked, looking at the man with concern. 

“Both Namjoon and Y/N need to move on. It’s clear to me they have no unfinished business, so the reason they’re still here isn’t that.” He explained. “Sometimes when people die young they just get stuck behind, it’s not common but it happens.”

“So this will be our last goodbye?” Jungkook’s big doe eyes started to well with tears again.

“Yes, it will be.” He nodded. “Please say your final words.”

“Y/N,” Yoongi started, you watched as your brother’s lip trembled, trying to find the right words to say to you. “There’s so much I want to say but I can’t get it out. . I-I love you. You’ll always be my baby sister.”

Next up was Jungkook, who was keeping his eyes squeezed shut. “I wish. . .I wish I could’ve done more for you. I miss you and- and I’ll never forget you.”

“Namjoonie. . .” Seokjin began. “It seems like I just got you back and now I’m losing you again.” He let out a weak laugh. “I love you. You’re always in my thoughts.”

Finally was Taehyung, who just sat there with his lips pursed in thought. “Uncle Namjoon. . . I’m glad I at least got to meet you. . .kinda.” He smiled lightly. “Thank you for being there for Y/N. Please watch over her, she’s kind of a mess sometimes.” He laughed, causing the table to erupt in chuckles. 

“Hey, I’m not that much of a mess!” You countered.

“Yes, you are.” Namjoon asserted as Taehyung finished his thought.

“Y/N, I’m. . . I’m gonna miss you. I’ll always be your bug.” He concluded. The table turned their attention back towards Jimin, who was wiping away tears. 

“They’re not saying anything but it’s clear that they love you,” he said with a smile as he dabbed his under eyes with a handkerchief. “Now, Namjoon and Y/N. Please stand behind me and put your hands on my shoulders.” You followed his instructions, placing your hands on his shoulders, causing him to shiver. “Ooh cold. Now, join hands everyone.” He held out his hands for Yoongi and Taehyung to take. They did and the rest followed suit. 

They all sat there in silence, eyes closed. You and Namjoon looked to each other, neither of you knew what was going to happen next. He’s tried for years to move on physically saying he’s moving on or had no more unfinished business, meditating. Nothing worked. Maybe he was stuck and needed a real and proper psychic’s help?

Suddenly warmth covered you and Namjoon. It’s been years since he’d felt warmth like this. He let out a sigh as the feeling enveloped him. He looked over to you and you had a relaxed smile on your face, content with everything. The sadness he was so used to seeing on your face was now replaced with a look of peace. If he was to look in the mirror, he was sure he’d look the same. 

There was no light that neither of you could recall going into. You both just watched your world melt away into the next.

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