#bucky barnes breakup

[georgiapeach30513]

Keys in Your Ignition, Part 16

Summary:  You talk to Bucky, and figure out where you belong

Pairings:  Bucky Barnes X Reader, Curtis X Reader, Hayden X Reader

Rating: 😭😭

Warnings:  language, talks about the MC, angry Curtis, unwanted kissing, 18+ ONLY

Word Count:  2.2K

Previous

Series Masterlist

*Dividers by @firefly-graphics​

“You sure you’re ready for this?” Curtis lingers at the doorway of your room in Steve and Tulip’s apartment, while you finish tying your shoes.

“I’ve got to do this. And there’s no perfect time, so why not now?”

He nods his head, looking around your room, there were very few touches of yourself here, the room looking generic and barely lived in, “How often do you stay in here?” you shrug, standing up, you grab a very specific hoodie, smelling it before pulling it over your head. “You refusing to answer because you don’t know, or are you refusing to answer because you know you just don’t want to admit you’re always upstairs?”

“Um…we should go before it gets too late.”

“Doll, how often are you in my brother’s apartment?” he gets another shrug, but this time a giggle. “What?”

“He has a spare room.”

“And where do you sleep?”

“Stop asking me stupid questions, and lets go.”

“Wait,” standing solid in the doorway, he refuses to let you pass him, “Don’t hurt him. I know that I’m always worried about you, but don’t hurt him. My brother is a good kid, and I can’t have you going between him and Bucky.”

“That’s not what I’m doing. I’m…I can’t move forward with Hayden until I know, you know?” he tilts his head to the side, not understanding what it is you’re saying. “If I want to fully move forward with Hayden, I have to fully close the door with JB. Him and I both deserve that. Hayden deserves that, too. He deserves the world, and I can’t give him that right now.”

“Fine. If you break my brother’s heart, I’m just going to…”

“I’m not fucking you.”

Curtis stares at you unblinking, before dragging your body to the door, “You had to say that. I can tell by the way he looks at you, that he’s thought about it,” playfully you smack at his arm with a laugh. “Oh, come on, you know Hayden has thought about it, and so have you. It’s healthy to wonder what sex would feel like with someone you feel attracted to. So don’t feel bad that you’ve thought about my brother naked.”

“Ugh! Shut up,” for once, you’re actually excited that it’s the truck you’re driving, instead of the bike, it was a cold December day. “This is not appropriate talk about your brother, Curtis!”

“Just tell me you’re hopelessly…”

“Shh! It’s bad enough you caught us making out, I’m not telling you more,” you walk past him, pointing at the front door, and waiting for him to join.

“That was making out? Oh, sheesh, you’ve got a lot to learn.”

“It was our first date!”

“Hey,” he stops you from fully going out into the hallway, pulling you back into him, “I’ve never seen you smile so big than when you’re around him,” you try to shush him again, but he walks past you in the hallway, “I know, he adds to your happiness, he doesn’t take away. Let’s get this over with. I’ll kill everyone in that club if this goes bad. Doll, you know what you’re walking into. This isn’t what you’ve been living with? You’re going back into the belly of the beast.”

“I know. Just let me breathe, okay?” he nods his head, opening the truck door for you to get in. Starting a slow count of your inhales and exhales. You could do this.  You had to do this.

Curtis looks at you as he puts the car into park. Your eyes roaming over the bikes, and noticing that not only is Bucky’s here, but so is Ari’s.

“You don’t have to do this,” Curtis says softly, but you’re already opening the door. Waiting on him to join you before you walk into the club. Walking into the haze of smoke, the smell of beer and cheap whores, and right at the front is Ari.

He pushes aside his woman for the evening to walk up to you, his arms held out wide for a hug, and he looks you up and down with a smile. Extending a hand out to Curtis, “He let you off his leash?”

“Curtis isn’t my keeper. I chose to come here, just like I can choose to leave.”

“Easy, Doll. I’m not here for an argument. You look good. You look happy,” he steps back from you, never offering another touch, and you smile at him with a bashful nod. “Why would you come back to a dump like this then? Didn’t you want to get out? Your prince got you away from here, and now you’re crawling back.”

“Where’s JB?” Ari clears his throat looking to the rooms. “Curtis isn’t my prince. He is my friend.”

“I didn’t mean it like that. I’m sorry. Seriously. You look good, kid. Whatever you’re doing, keep doing it. Stay away from here. And away from those rooms. I wouldn’t go in there if I were you.”

Your face falls when you look back to the rooms. Taking one step in that direction before stopping, “He’s…he’s not been the same.”

“I don’t control his happiness.”

“I know that, but,” he gives a tug to your arm when you move towards the rooms to see him, and you stop, “Doll, just go back wherever you’ve been. Leave this place, and never come back.”

You pull his hand off of you, and jog off to Bucky’s room, shocked to see him sitting on the floor, taking a long drag from a blunt, “JB?”

“Doll?” he tries to get up, but stumbles before he gets to you. Righting himself, before engulfing you in a hug, “I knew you’d come back to me, baby. I knew you’d work things out, and come back. I,” hearing his bathroom door open, he winces.

“Bucky, I don’t have any clean clothes to wear.”

“Just get something of mine, dammit,” the blonde girl looks confused looking at you, but chooses not to comment. Grabbing up a shirt of his and scurrying out of his bedroom. “That’s not what it looked like.”

“Looked like Courtney. The girl who was stealing from the bar. Glad to see she had consequences,” you look around his room, and it’s a disgusting mess. Your breathing starts to pick up, and you look towards the floor. “I was taking  punishment for something she did, and she ends up in your bed. And it’s not even the fact that it’s your bed, you’re free to do what you want. It’s the fact that it’s her!”

“Like you weren’t in Curtis’,” you take a step back from him, unsure if this was even worth it. “Doll, don’t worry about them. This is about me and you.”

“No, this is about them. All of them. And no, I wasn’t with Curtis like that. God, y’all are all the same. It’s always about who I’m laying under. I haven’t been with anyone. Not like that. I…I was dealing with my shit, and…and y-y-you’re just doing shit. You thought that…that I was going to come back and run right into your arms? I-I-I can’t be here,” your body trembles with anger and just hurt.  Turning to leave, but he pulls at your arm, and you sling him away.

“What are you talking about? Doll calm down,” he tries to touch your arms again, but this time you push him back. “Doll, stop.”

“I’m not staying here!”

“You mean with me? You’re not staying here with me?”

“And you won’t leave with me. We’re two different people,” he shakes his head no at you, pulling you closer. “I’m not staying.”

“No, you came back to me. Doll, please, don’t do this. That stupid slut is no one.”

“There’s always going to be some stupid slut. I can’t stay here, and I won’t. Get off of me,” he pulls you closer, pressing his lips against yours, and it feels cold. An almost desperation on his part, but you hate it. There was no warmth, and you try pushing him off of you. “Bucky, stop! Stop!”

“Don’t leave me,” he gasps for air, moving his lips to your neck. “You’re always going to come back.”

“Bucky! Please, stop. I’m not in love with you anymore. Stop!” his kisses press harder, and you know with him and this place, you were never going to get a choice. It was always going to be someone making up your mind for you. “Stop!”

Curtis slings the door open, and pulls Bucky’s arms off of you, and pushes you behind him. His large hand runs down your face, wiping away your tears, and asking if you’re okay.

“I knew it. You took her away from here, so you could get your hands all over her! This is why you’ve got me so fucked up. One bed to the next. One bike to the other.”

“She doesn’t owe you a fucking explanation. But we’re not together, and if we were, it would serve you right. You don’t get to tell her what she’s going to do.”

“She wouldn’t listen anyway. Why did you come back? To rub it in my face that you’ve moved on again? I fucking screwed you up in the head? You were the one that screwed me up! You don’t get to come around here making me promises, and…”

“I never made you a promise. I came to apologize. You’re the one that mistook this visit. I wanted to clear the air, Bucky. I wanted you to step up for me then. I needed you to step up for me, and you just fucking used me. Did I ever mean anything to you? I’m always going to be your excuse, huh? It’s always someone else’s fucking fault!” he flinches towards you, but Curtis pushes him to the ground.

“Sober up. Doll, are you ready?”

“Bucky, I’m sorry. I can’t stay here. I won’t be an old lady. And you won’t leave. There is no us. I’m not doing this now, or ever. I got better for me. You wallowed in self pity. I won’t watch you drag yourself down further. Do better. Goodbye, Bucky.”

When the door closes, he throws a beer bottle at the door, letting out a scream, and Curtis holds tighter to you, “Curtis, I’m cold,” Curtis drags you into the truck, and doesn’t stop until he gets to the apartment building and watches you run to Hayden’s arms. You needed your warmth. Your comfort.

Hayden opens the door, looking confused, but pulls you in tight, looking at Curtis questioningly. “Haydes, I’m cold.”

“Let’s get some tea,” Curtis follows the two of you in, but you walk directly to his bedroom, pulling him in with you. “Doll face, what’s wrong?”

“I just,” you know sex is not the answer, and Hayden means more to you, than a way to forget. “I just want you to hold me until I fall asleep.”

Hayden stays with you, until you’re curled up into a ball fast asleep. Staying a moment, before walking back out to the living room, “You’re still here?” his feet shuffle around. Looking back at his bedroom door, he turns back to Curtis. “Who hurt her?”

“She’ll have to tell you.”

“It looks like — like she had a breakup. Was she…Curtis was there someone else?” Curtis shakes his head no, and taps on the couch beside him. “No, you tell me that nothing happened.”

“Nothing happened. She went back to the MC, and she officially left. Told everyone she wasn’t coming back,” Hayden sinks onto the couch, still not believing Curtis. “It’s more complicated than that. But unless your name was Everett, she didn’t talk to them for nearly eight months. There wasn’t another man. Just a past. And she shut the door to the MC for good,” Curtis stares blankly at the tv that neither of them want to turn, and he thinks about his role in the club. There was a reason he never had a steady woman. He wasn’t like them. He would not disrespect women the way that those men did. Even the ones that claim to be in love.

He wondered how many times you had told Bucky to quit. How hard you had tried to push him away, and just what was running in your head during it. He might never know how you were terrified that the moment with Bucky would push Hayden away. That the only thought running in your mind was how your vision of a future changed, and Bucky wasn’t part of it. Or just how much it hurt to fully lose your first love, and a life you thought you you would be stuck in, be gone in an instant. You wouldn’t be back, and Bucky didn’t want to join you. He wanted you to join him.

“Curtis, she scares me,” Hayden whispers looking back at the door.

“Why?”

“I’m falling fast. And I don’t want to lose her or what we’ve had. And I know I walked into a mess, but I don’t care. She is worth it. If she’ll have me.”

“Kid, I think you’re going to be okay. Just take things slow. She needs time to learn you, and know your boundaries as a couple. You speed things up, and she’s likely to pull away. Keep it sweet. Keep being her comfort. She stopped saying she was cold when she was around you. I don’t think she realized that it wasn’t a literal cold feeling, she needed her warmth. She needed you. Hey, where are you going?”

Curtis looks at Hayden when he goes to stand up, “Going to bring her some warmth. You can sleep in the guest room. She won’t be going anywhere.”

“Hayden, easy on her.”

“I know.”

Next

Masterlist

Taglist:  @tis-thedamn-season​ @marveloustaylortot​ @pono-pura-vida​ @sstan-hoe​ @peaches1958​ @kaybaby2494 @flannellover67​ @infatuatedjanes​ @redbloodedgurl​ @thedarknessilove​ @whimsyplaty92​ @tryingtosurvivestuff​ @superforgottensoul​  

#keys in your igntion #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x fem!reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes breakup #ex!bucky barnes #biker au #harvard hottie #hayden everett x reader #hayden everett #hayden everett x y/n #hayden everett x you

[nataliasquote]

This Is Me Trying | n romanoff

Summary: Inspired by ‘this is me trying’ by Taylor Swift

Warnings: angst, break up, slight toxic relationship, alcoholism, glass smashing, no happy ending sorry

wc: 2.3k

note: happy TTPD countdown day :) thought it would be a good idea to post a Taylor fic before all I think and talk about for the next few days is TTPD 🤍

-⧗-

Some relationships are simply not meant to be. No matter how hard you force it, or swear that it will get better, the foundations were cracked from the beginning and no amount of work will ever truly fix them.

And as Natasha stood in the pouring rain, the wilting bouquet of flowers hanging limply by her side as you shut the door in her face, her resolve threatened to crumple like the cellophane in her palm.

She was convinced you were the love of her life. Days with you used to feel breathless and electric, a stark contrast to the strained atmosphere between the two of you now.

Natasha had tried everything. She gave her notice in at work, not just retreating to desk work but quitting all together, just for you. It was what you wanted, you’d made that clear. Your nerves couldn’t handle Natasha in that field for a day longer.

But that wasn’t enough; nothing ever would be. No matter what Natasha did, you were never going to work out. She quit her life for you, and somehow the rift expanded at twice the rate. Constant arguments and fights inevitably lead to an explosion of words that led to you storming out, the slam of the door rattling the windows in their frames.

You walked out that day and took a piece of her heart with you, leaving a broken redhead on her knees in the echoing apartment. Natasha began her free fall, not having work to consume every moment she had anymore.

How did Shield’s top agent drop so far behind that she was passed out on the couch mid afternoon, a bottle of vodka just out of reach of her fingers as her arm hung off the couch. Her hair was greasy, scraped back into a messy ponytail and her skin was blotchy as a result of her neglect.

When she wasn’t asleep, she watched her phone with her knees pulled up to her chest. It sat on the other side of the couch, the screen blank, and she almost bore holes into the glass from how hard she stared. Just willing a message to come through. A reply to the fifteen texts she’d sent you. One for every day you’d been gone, pouring what was left of her heart into an apology and promising to do better.

She thought she was the problem, her clouded judgment not allowing her to see that you weren’t all that innocent either. She never blamed you for being paranoid, working as a nurse in the busiest ER in the state had your nerves frayed anyway. Nevermind always being scared that you’d see your girlfriend on one of those gurneys, her name being added to a list of patients you’d lost under your care.

Fear made you cold and you took it out on Natasha. Did she deserve it? Absolutely not, but your words were out before you could stop them. The hot headedness between you both always clashed and on the nights you couldn’t solve it with heavy make up sex, at least one of you would be yelling whilst the other sat with their head in their hands.

Natasha didn’t know what she was doing when it came to love, you were her first and by the looks of it, her last. She was too hard on herself, and it hurt you to listen to the way she berated herself after a failed mission. But whenever her mind was set, there was no changing it. Harsh or soft, your words did nothing to change her destructive mindset and it was beginning to get to you. You wanted your home to be light, a place filled with love that you could return to after a horrible day. But instead it was dependent on how Natasha felt and whether you were going to be walking on eggshells that night or not.

But there was only so much creeping around you could do before your patience snapped. You didn’t mean to shout but it all happened so fast and suddenly there was glass everywhere and the last thing you knew you had grabbed your scarf and fled. Hands shaking on the wheel as you pulled up to a red light, pressing decline as Natasha’s name flashed up on your phone for the third time.

Twenty missed calls. Fifteen texts. Natasha was close to smashing her phone against the wall too. Her nose ran as she sat there, chin on her arm. Ears barely even registering the sound of the doorknob twisting or keys rattling in the door. She just wanted that message to appear, or even a phone call.

What she’d do to hear your voice again.

Heavy but tentative footsteps sounded down the hall before they stopped in the doorway of the living room. Natasha only looked up when a cough caught her attention, and the brunette in the doorway was certainly not who she was expecting to see.

“Y/n has gone to stay with her brother,” the woman began, her arms folded, unimpressed with the state of her friend. “Bucky told me everything that happened. Oh, and you look like shit.”

“Thanks, ‘Ria,” Natasha grumbled sarcastically, her voice low and monotonous. Maria walked over and grabbed her arm, surprisingly met with very little resistance as she pulled the redhead up off the couch and shoved her in the direction of the bathroom.

“I’m gonna clean up in here, you need to shower, and then we’ll talk.” Natasha went to protest but abruptly shut her mouth at Maria’s raised brow. “I’m moving past the fact that you haven’t called in about three months, so go, sort yourself out Nat. This isn’t like you.”

As the redhead trudged off to the bathroom, Maria collected up the empty bottles, shaking her head at the amount she found. How the same woman who had set records in Shield’s history and had the most prolific skill set she knew, had now drank herself into such a mess, Maria had no idea. Bucky hadn’t said much on your state but she doubted you were thriving either.

Once the living room was straightened out and all the bottles hidden away, Natasha emerged from the bathroom looking slightly better. She relayed the details from two weeks ago and Maria’s face fell at how Natasha barely kept it together. Her chapped lips trembled and her nails itched at the scars across her hands as she spoke, eyes looking everywhere but her friend.

“I still love her and it’s fucking terrifying,” Natasha cried, sinking her head into her hands as she hunched over her knees. “I’m not cut out for this love stuff, but I want it with her and now I’ve lost her. She won’t call, text, nothing, I’ve never felt so lost. I don’t even know what to do!”

“Nat, just breathe for a second or you’re gonna have a panic attack,” Maria interjected, leaning forward in her chair slightly ready to assist if needed. But Natasha just slumped back against the misshapen cushion and sighed heavily, zoning out on a bottle of whisky beside the tv.

“I’m trying, Maria. I’m really trying but she doesn’t want anything to do with me. What am I doing wrong?”

Maria shook her head and moved onto the end of Natasha’s couch. “You’re not doing anything wrong Nat, I promise. Ok, so the drinking was a shitty move, but at least you’re trying.” Her words seemingly fell on deaf ears but Natasha had heard her. And they resonated hard.

At least I’m trying… right?

“When was the last time you left the house?”

“I can’t,” Natasha croaked, her teeth chewing on her lip again. “I can’t go anywhere because all I see is her. It’s really fucking hard when every tiny thing is a reminder of her and what I’ve lost. Even the films, for god’s sake! I can’t even numb myself with tv because she’s somehow always there!” She gestured at the blank tv screen and came face to face with her disheveled reflection staring back from the black screen. “I’m sorry I missed your birthday, I tried-“

“It’s okay, birthdays happen every year. You’ll be there for the next one.” She gave Natasha a warm smile, and for the first time in weeks, Natasha felt her lips curl up slightly too. “I’m going to order takeout, and then you and I are going to watch a Bond film, no protesting. Give her time.” Maria spotted the phone on the table in front of her. “I’m also confiscating this or you’ll drive yourself insane.”

Natasha was too tired to protest, so she nodded blindly and let Maria drag her around. She didn’t admit it, but letting her mind drift away from Y/n for an evening was refreshing. Maybe she could do this. If she tried hard enough, life could be good again. She could work through it, toughen it out like she used to do.

After all, this was her trying…

But the same couldn’t be said for Natasha a week later. She’d woken up late and anxious, after a nightmare involving Y/n had shaken her to the core. She waited out the day with sweating palms but as the clock struck seven she couldn’t wait any longer. The weather was horrendous and heavy raindrops ricocheted off her windscreen as she drove to the grocery store, her eyes hazy in the streetlights.

Grabbing the first bouquet of flowers she saw, Natasha walked down the alcohol aisle to get to the checkout. But her eyes fell on a familiar bottle of brown liquid and she froze, almost dropping the flowers onto the floor.

The first bottle of whisky you’d ever bought her as a gift, the same one that was on the tv stand, now stared back at her on the shelf, the reduced sticker glaring bright. Without a second thought, Natasha grabbed it off the shelf and scanned it at the self service, her chest heaving as she fumbled with coins to pay.

The rain hadn’t eased up and her thin hoodie did nothing to stop the water from soaking into her skin. Her purchases lay abandoned on the passenger seat, the place you normally sat, as she weaved through the streets towards your brother’s house. She knew the way for emergencies and a single thanksgiving dinner.

But she didn’t get out of the car straight away, like she’d envisioned. The engine cut off and she sat in the dark vehicle, eyes trained on the front door like she willed you to come out and greet her. All the courage had suddenly fled from her body and she felt like curling up on herself like a scared child.

With a grunt, she grabbed the flowers, leaving the bottle discarded on the seat, and crunched across the stone driveway to the front porch, knuckles confidently knocking on the damp wooden door. Faint rustling could be heard and Natasha thought as though her heart would fall out of her chest and drop onto the ‘Welcome’ mat like a cat’s peace offering of a mangled bird.

The door opened. Natasha’s legs almost gave way when she finally saw your face, paler and a little thinner than it was before. She watched you take her appearance in, the soaked bouquet of flowers slightly crushed from their journey. Her mouth opened and closed, no words offering themselves up for her to use.

“I, um-“

“What are you doing here, Natasha?” You asked, voice cold. She wasn’t used to you talking like this to her, even if that’s how the last month of your relationship had been. She remembered the happier times and clung on to them for dear life.

“I just…” she trailed off, feeling so ridiculously hopeless. Maybe she didn’t quite know what to say, now that she was actually here. “I miss you- us. Look, I just wanted you to know that I’m trying, I really am, and I can do better. I want to make it up to you, please Y/n.” She held out the bouquet, feeling more like a teenage boy getting rejected by his crush.

Y/n’s conflict was so evident in her eyes, but she could feel her brother’s presence only meters away and she knew what he’d say if he invited Natasha inside.

It was too soon, and as much as she wanted nothing more than to run into her redhead’s arms, the smash of a plate still echoed in her mind and she couldn’t go through that again. Not yet anyway…

“I can’t, Nat, I’m sorry. I know you’re trying, I am too, but I can’t do this again.” Natasha’s eyes threatened to fill up with tears as she gulped. “Not yet. I’ll call you when I’m ready and we can talk. I’m really sorry.”

You didn’t mean it, but you had to shut the door before she saw your tears fall. It barely fell into the lock before you sank to the ground, shoulder against the door as tears streamed down your face. Seeing her face hit you harder than ever before and you wanted to run into her arms, feel her and smell her around you as you promised everything was going to be alright.

But it wasn’t.

And as Natasha trudged back to her car and leaned against the locked door and the rain beat down on her fragile body, she let out the most heart wrenching sob. The flowers dropped onto the soaking asphalt as she pulled her arms tightly around her body, trying to mirror the comfort that your hugs used to provide. She didn’t even care that she’d probably get sick from the rain, nothing mattered anymore.

Nothing mattered but you, and your name fell from her lips as she cried, tears mixing with the raindrops. She didn’t know you were crying out for her in Bucky’s arms only meters away, wanting another chance.

You wanted to try again, all for her.

#natasha romanoff #marvel #fanfic #natasha romanoff x reader #black widow #natasha romanoff fluff #natasha romanoff angst #natasha romanoff oneshot #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff fanfic #natasha romonova #marvel fic #angst #wlw #breakup #natasha romanoff x female #natasha romanoff x female reader #scarlett johansson #maria hill #bucky barnes

[mrs-bucky-barnes106]

Nothing New

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[summer-may]

Broken.

Stucky × reader.

It was late, and dark clouds gathered outside. The rumblings of clouds and lightning put a heavy weight on your heart. Everything was making you uncomfortable, the noise of lighting, the tick of the clock, the beat of your heart, everything. You didn't know if it was because you were getting sick or the fact that your boyfriends were being distant towards you.

It was a gradual process, the shared glances between them when you three were together, the whispers, the lack of physical affection, and the absence of communication when they were on a mission. The thought that maybe something was wrong never crossed your mind. You like a lovestruck fool thought maybe they were planning a surprise for you.

But they were getting ready to surprise you. You just didn't know it was a surprise that would destroy you and leave you in pieces.

As you were getting ready for the dinner you three had planned at your apartment, you put the tint on your lips at looked at your eyes, the dark circles you had tried to hide were still a little visible. You frowned, but let it go to check on the apple pie, which was in the oven, ready to eat, just being kept warm.

Apple pie, the desert three of you loved. It had been a while since you had made it for all of you.

The uneasiness increased as the seconds passed. The door opened, and both your boys appeared in the kitchen. Their jackets probably strung on the hook in the foyer and shoes beside the door.

The light in their eyes, whenever they say you, wasn't the same. The urgency with which they would rush towards you was now a slow drag of limbs. The way their hand held you was also different, more aloof. They even smelled different, if that was possible. You had later realized they had stopped wearing the cologne you had given them on your anniversary.

You sat down, and the round table that felt cozy and comfortable now felt huge and uncomfortable. The seats were way too far, the chairs hard and stiff, your hands were on your lap, and the dinner was done in silence, with the conversation being something spoken like between colleagues. Impersonal and boring.

The pie was placed, and the air shifted. It constricted, now suddenly it was hard to breathe. The glances, the hard swallows, the holding of hands, and the preparation of the telling you were almost done.

"Sweetheart, I- we have something to say," Steve spoke, his voice sweet and low, as if talking to an injured animal and trying to help it, while making sure they don't spook it.

You, stupid you. Felt the pressure and the seriousness and still thought it might have been something related to a job that they might have to leave for or a mission or something.

Why would it cross your mind that they were trying to break up with you. They had promised, and you believed them, loved them, respected them to hold them to their words of you three being together for life.

He parted his lips, that you had kissed a thousand times, and uttered the words, "We think it's - I mean- we feel that we don't click any more," he looked at Bucky, who continued looking at the table, "honey- I just, feel like we don't have that spark anymore, like the three of us don't feel right."

Your head felt fuzzy, the impending migraine knocking on the doors, and your food trying to crawl its way back out.

"I-I don't," you swallowed and felt your breath stuttering, "you guys are breaking up with me?"

"Yes." Both muttered, finally looking at you.

The finality and assurance both of them spoke with was the shock your body needed. The bile rose in your throat and you got up so fast that the chair fell down with a loud thud, making both of them jump a little in their seats and look at you with concern in their eyes but before they could say anything you ran to the bathroom and emptied all the contents of your stomach.

You felt tears leaking from your eyes, it felt as if your actual heart was going to come out of your mouth at any moment and their presence behind you, their hands rubbing your back, cooing and sympathizing, didn't make you feel warm and safe, but made you uncomfortable, reminding you that this was just them being kind and cordial, and not because they loved you.

As that thought entered your mind, you felt yourself go and let out a sob so loud you surprised yourself.

You pushed Steve's, or was it Bucky's hand away. Now you couldn't stand to feel them touch you. You still loved them. The knowledge that they didn't love you made you physically recoil at their touch. It made you feel worthless, unloved, and discarded by them.

Minutes passed, or was it hours? To you, honestly, it felt like years.

You took deep breaths, your knees up to your chest, back pressed to the bathtub and face hiding between your knees. You didn't want to look at them, but you knew you needed answers or you were going to overthink yourself to death.

"Why?" Your voice didn't feel like yours anymore, hoarse from all the crying, "why did you stop loving me?" You looked at them sitting on the floor in front of you.

Bucky and Steve looked like they were shot, their face grimacing and body wound up so tight that one would think they were being tortured. Maybe one way they were, getting questioned by a mess of a girl, who was so close to breaking down again, you thought.

"I- I don't know," Bucky whispered, eyes screwed shut, his knuckles turning white with how tight his fist was.

You let out a dry chuckle, your voice echoing disbelief and anger, which you were glad to feel. "I find that very hard to believe, James. Can't tell me that you expect me to believe that, do you?"

You knew that hearing James had an effect on him. On both of them. His nostrils flared, and his chest moved with a big breath, but now you really didn't find it in yourself to sympathize. This hurt he felt was nothing compared to the fucking knives lodged into your chest.

He knew you didn't want to be bullshitted, so they braced themselves for the emotionally draining night they were going to have ahead.

"I genuinely don't know, it wasn't one day, like the comfort and warmth I felt while seeing you started dwindling down, slowly," Steve rubbed his hand on his face taking a deep breath and continued, "I-I also felt jealous when Bucky and you would spend time together alone, and it turned to anger that was misplaced and disgusting." He stopped his voice shaky, eyes brimming with tears.

You felt your heart drop into your stomach, your fingers clenching your knees till their were indents in your skin. You looked towards Bucky to say his piece.

Bucky really did look like he was going to fall down and wail at that point. His eyes were red, and tears were free falling at this point. "I do love you, doll, I really do," his voice not above a whisper and tortured, "but I don't know when I stopped being in love with you."

"I tried, I really did try, to try and get back that feeling, because you are along with steve one the best thing that has ever happened to me," he came forward to touch hands on your knees, and you let him. At this point, you were exhausted, this build up was coming up to months now, and this climax was not the one you were expecting.

You also remember, the time a couple of weeks back were Bucky was very, very touchy and romantic. Letters, flowers, romantic dinners, you name it was an every day occurrence from Bucky and you like a fool had been oblivious to the fact that maybe this influx of emotions was the result of something else and not just plain, mind numbing love.

You looked at Steve, you both holding eye contact till his lowered and his lip being on the verge of bleeding with how hard he was biting on it.

"So what? You both held a meeting and decided it was time to end this trio and dump me?"

"I felt like my jealousy and anger was coming on too strong and talked to him, and realized he was on the same wavelength," he rubbed his eyes, his hands shaking. Huh, it was probably the first time you had seen him trembling, "we tried, baby, we really did. But then I realized it was probably better if we let you go instead of being tied to absolute asshole like us."

The anger was returning with full force, for which you felt so grateful, you pushed Bucky's hand holding onto yours like a lifeline away and stood up and left the bathroom, and started pacing around the bedroom.

"You guys are so great, huh?" You spat, pointing towards their general direction. "You get together with me because you love me, and then break up with me because you love me!"

"But it's true, and I am so fucking sorry!" Bucky yelled, wiping his tears. Steve was stroking his arm to calm him down.

Suddenly, seeing both of them now being the comfort for each other, with no need or want for you, was enough to finally pierce through your brain that it was definitely over.

You stepped back slowly and sat down on the couch, uttering with exhaustion, "Okay. I understand, I need you guys to leave."

"Baby-"

"Darlin-"

Both of them knew you, how much you mean what you say, and knowing that, they didn't want to be more cruel than they already had been. With tears streaming down their face, they both left and also left the keys on the kitchen table. When they closed the door, they heard the sob that broke their fucking hearts.

"I'm going to need you guys to stop calling me that. Please stop. Because now it just fucking hurts." You interrupted them.

"Do you think we did the right thing, Steve?"

"No. But it was necessary."

"I'll never forgive us for breaking her heart and ours, too."

"I know, but i'd rather hate myself for the rest of my life than lose her forever. At least this way, she'll still be here, and we can love her from afar."

reblogging and comments are highly recommended!

#steve rogers x bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #steve rogers x reader #stucky x reader #poly stucky #stucky #Steve rogers #bucky barnes #avengers #captain America #winter soldier #my works #steve × reader #bucky × reader #steve rogers fanfiction #bucky barnes fanfiction #angst #breakup!au #breakup

[fsbc-librarian]

hi! i was wondering if you can help me find this fic 😭 steve and bucky have this friends with benefits type relationship and then bucky calls it off and stops going to meet for drinks and steve’s confused about that and at one point bucky explains how he only really showed up for steve. i remember bucky is a plumber bc it’s the family business and he’s living at home bc his mom has alzheimer’s or dementia and steve’s really good with her. bucky is also really close to sams sister sarah and that’s how he knows steve and steve gets mad at tony for not inviting bucky to his birthday party. bucky also dates brock briefly and brock is really jealous of steve and brock makes a big scene at bucky birthday party at a bar or something. omg i hope all this made sense, i remember reading this fic and i can’t for the life of me find it again 💀

Oh! This is one of my favourites!

If This Is As Far As We Go

BeauRadley

Steve's perfectly happy with his and Bucky's friends-with-benefits arrangement until Bucky abruptly ends it. And Steve's fine. Honestly, he's totally fine.

#stucky #fsbc #fsbc library #bucky barnes #steve rogers #fanfiction #fanfic #fic rec #breakup

[sjsmith56]

Decisions and Consequences - Chapter 12, Finding Jade

Summary: Jade enlists Dr. Strange and Wanda into helping her change her brain so that the remaining cult members leave her alone. When Bucky learns what she has done they argue. Both of them overreact but Bucky takes it further by leaving. Bruce and Kathy reach an understanding.

Length: 5.4K

Characters: Bucky Barnes, Jade, Dr. Strange, Wanda, Steve Rogers, Ma, Ben.

Warnings: 18+ content, sexual content not suitable for readers under the age of 18, religious imagery, intense argument with angry and emotional context, several broken hearts, despair, idiots in love.

Author’s notes: This is a breakup chapter. Although there are parts that are loving and tender, it is also the point where two strong personalities, Bucky and Jade, collide strongly as she asserts her right to control her abilities, while he disagrees with how she did it. Bucky doesn’t just hurt her but he also hurts Ben. They are idiots in love and both overreact. On the plus side, Bruce and Kathy (Ma) reach an understanding.

<<Chapter 11

🔥

The success of the test was celebrated that evening with a bonfire, beer, scotch, and s'mores.  People were giddy that there was now a possible solution to the Others.  It had been destructive but if they could clear out the drier areas of the country then adapt the process to areas with more water it was possible to see the end of the occupation.  Bucky sat on the ground, his back against a large boulder that he and Steve had carried in, with Jade curled up in between his legs.  Ben sat cross legged on top of the boulder above them.  Jade wore a sweater with Bucky's jean jacket over it but his body warmth also kept her warm as she nestled herself into him.  Every so often they would kiss softly and people around them would smile at the couple.  That they were crazy about each other was obvious, even to Stamets, who had stayed to enjoy the company of these unique people.  He asked Strange if they were newlyweds and was surprised they had only known each other a couple of months.  Just before 9 pm Wanda sent a thought message to Jade that she was heading to the garage.  Jade answered back and a few minutes later kissed Bucky and excused herself to go to the washroom.  His hand lingered in hers as she rose and she turned to look at him as she left the party.  Quickly she made her way to the garage where Wanda and Strange were already waiting.  Before she could say anything Strange looked severely at her.

"You know we won't be able to reverse this if you change your mind," he said.  "I'm just the show but Wanda will be making serious changes to your brain to remove your gift."

"I know," said Jade.  "As long as they can sense me they will find me.  If it's not me they will latch on to the next false prophet.  We have to break their faith so that they are never taken in again by a dangerous con man.  I'm willing to give up my gift as I never wanted it in the first place."

"Are you sure you can live without it?" asked Wanda.  "It's been part of you since you were a child.  Even if you didn't actively use it was always there, guiding you, alerting you, comforting you."

"I have to," said Jade.  "I'm tired of it.  I'm tired of hearing other peoples' voices in my head and hearing their darkest thoughts.  It weighs me down.  Can you do it?  Can you make it look like God is taking his wrath out on me for daring to be a false idol?"

Strange looked at Wanda and she nodded.  "Yes, when do you want to do it?"

"Tomorrow, Saturday, provision run," said Jade.  "Probably the last one for this Bunker if the Avengers take their show on the road.

Before she left Wanda placed her hands on Jade's face and head, seeing where her gift originated and where she could safely sever connections that would render her gift useless.  When she was finished Jade went back to the common area and back out to the party, lowering herself close to Bucky again, receiving his welcoming kiss and leaning her head on his shoulder.  She apologized for being late saying she heard Cherry nicker in the garage and went to check on her.

"How much longer are we going to stay out here?" she whispered.  "I want you."

He kissed her softly.  "Soon," he whispered back.  "I want you, too."

About ten minutes later he whispered it was time and they both got up and said their good nights to everyone.  Ben asked if he could sleep on Peter's couch again to which they readily agreed.  As soon as they got inside the suite they ran to the bedroom and stripped down in a frenzy.  Jade finished first and tackled Bucky onto the bed, straddling him before he could pull his jeans completely off. 

"Pretty slow for a super soldier," she said, looking at him.

"Maybe I let you win," he replied.  "I might have planned to have you sit on me exactly like you're doing right now."

He pulled her down so her face was close to his and kissed her, pressing his lips hard against hers.  Then he rolled over so he was on top.  Stepping off the bed he finished pulling his jeans and briefs off while keeping his eyes firmly locked on hers.  He laid on top of her again and looked softly at her, running his fingers through her fine hair and kissing her again, his lips open to hers.  Grinding himself into her he switched his lips onto her neck running them over her skin as her breathing changed every time he made a pass.  Her hands were all over his back and bottom.  Then she breathed heavily into his ear and he felt himself rise sharply, a small yelp coming from her as she felt him poke her.  Smiling he moved down between her legs, opening them and kissing her pussy before exploring her with his tongue.  She writhed under him, and her small sighs grew louder as he found those special places that were pure pleasure to her. 

"Bucky," she groaned. 

He guided himself into her and pressed into her as far as he could before starting his rhythmic motion.  Her body was in motion as well, matching his tempo and pressure.  With her legs wrapped around him her gasps were loud and expressive. 

"Touch yourself," he gasped.  "I want to see you."

As if she was in a daze she ran her hands through her hair, watching him through half-lidded eyes.  Slowly she ran her fingertips over her face and down her neck.  Then she touched her breasts, gently at first, cupping them and massaging them, then roughly as her own arousal took control.  Bucky gasped loudly when she played with her nipples.  Then she moved one hand down her abdomen to find her clitoris and Bucky suddenly grabbed that hand and held it above her head with his prosthetic hand.  She moved her other hand to it so he could hold them both down and he lowered his weight onto her thrusting hard as he ground into her pubic bone.  Suddenly her gasps turned into cries and she struggled against his hand as her body writhed with the pleasure coursing through her.  Releasing her he kept thrusting for another minute before coming with his own cries of pleasure that Jade rewarded with kisses on his face and neck.  Their lips met in a gratified union of touch and taste. 

"I love you," he whispered. 

"I love you, too," she whispered back. 

Excusing himself Bucky went to the bathroom.  When he returned Jade was lying on her side and he curled up behind her, her back pressed against his chest, while his arms enclosed her.  He spoke to her but her voice, when she responded, was heavy with drowsiness so he let her fall asleep in his arms and he decided to put off his proposal once again. 

The next morning she was already in the shower when he awakened and she came out wrapped in a towel.  She smiled broadly at him and leaned forward to kiss him good morning.  When he tried to pull her back into bed she danced away from his hand.

"Provision run," she said.  "Likely the last one before you Avengers take off to save the world."

"I should go," he said, starting to rise.

"No, stay in bed," she said.  "I'll be okay.  I've got Peter, Steve, Clint, Scott, and Maria.  Peter is going to drive because they need you here."

"The kid?" laughed Bucky.  "I'm surprised Steve will let him.  Be careful.  The Others are still out there."

"I think they're doing a test on another nest this morning," said Jade.  "If they do they'll need you to pilot the quinjet.  Word is some military will be there."

She bent over and kissed him firmly, then left after he swatted her bottom lightly.  As soon as she left the bedroom her face changed and she hoped she was convincing enough for Bucky to believe it was just another day.  When she woke up she had thought she would tell him her plan but decided against it, thinking he would try to talk her out of it.  In the common room, spread all over the couches were the boxes of materials to be bartered.  One full box was of precious gemstones and geodes that she hoped would bring lots of buyers. 

Almost three hours later they made it to Albuquerque and the market.  Peter had driven well, even when signs of Others on the move had been spotted in the distance.  It was possible that the test the previous day had shaken the aliens.  Still, none had attacked them and that was always good.  As they approached the entrance to the city Steve had radioed in their code, the elevated track had risen and Peter proved his nerves and skills were as good as Steve and Bucky's, driving exactly one car length behind Steve at 50 mph on the course to the entrance.  As the small convoy made its way to its spot for the market Jade noticed some cult followers had spotted her in the car.   Peter pulled into his spot and went around to the trunk opening the boxes.  Jade stood on the other side of the trunk while Scott stood guard.  The lineup of people had already formed and the offers flew.  People were surprised to see the gemstones and geodes.  It was as Ma had speculated.  After so much time buying only necessities people were ready for something pretty.  The gemstones were almost gone when Scott stepped forward.

"It's mostly cult followers watching you," he said.  "Do you want to get in the car."

"No," said Jade.  "I have something in mind that will keep them from bothering me again."

"Wanda, Dr. Strange," said Jade.  "It's time."

"We're ready," said Wanda.  "Last chance to stop this, Jade.  There's no going back."

"I'm not changing my mind," she replied.  "Do it."

Jade stepped forward into the crowd.  Hands came out of nowhere to touch her and people were praising her as the prophet and the messiah.  Scott and Peter watched and one of them had the presence of mind to call to Steve, afraid the crowd was going to get out of control.   Suddenly a loud voice boomed.

"Thou shalt have no other Gods before me," boomed the voice.

A bright orb, brighter than the sun appeared above the crowd.  The cult followers were startled.

"Mother of greatness," one of them yelled.  "Tell God we worship him through you."

"I am the Lord thy God, this woman is an imposter," boomed the voice and the orb focused a red beam of light just on Jade.  "She shall be punished for portraying herself as a prophet."

Jade began to shake as she felt Wanda change her brain so her powers were dissolved.  Wanda told her to make it look good.  As she began to fall and writhe on the ground Steve started to go to her but Wanda restrained him and told him in his mind that Jade had wanted this.  Finally the red beam of light ceased and the orb returned to its natural golden form.

"Children of Adam, you are free from the influence of this woman and her kind.  Go forth and live a life of goodness, truth and honesty.  Beware of anyone who says they speak for me for they are false.  I have passed judgment on this false prophet and will do the same to others like her.  I have spoken."

The orb disappeared and the faithful stood there looking at each other.  At first they started to disperse then some became angry and wanted to take it out on Jade.  Steve waded in and reminded them that God had commanded them to live a life of goodness, truth and honesty.  He had already judged Jade, they didn't have the right to do the same.   They dispersed and he went to Jade.

"What did you just do?" he asked, concerned.

"I set them free from my father's influence," she said,  "and I gave up my gift so they can never find me again."

"Did Bucky know about this?" he asked. 

"Only Wanda and Dr. Strange," she said, feeling a little lightheaded.  "It was my decision and mine only.  Not even Ma knew.  I'm free of all of it."

"Get in the car and stay there until we finish here," said Steve, not unkindly.  "Bucky is not going to be happy with this," he said to Peter and Scott. 

When they arrived back at the bunker three hours later they found out the second test had gone like the first one and the military had asked for a copy of the recording so they could start planning their own attacks, especially in the areas in and around military bases.  The mood was jubilant among those who had stayed at the bunker but when they saw the faces of those who made the provision run they knew something had happened.

"What's going on?" asked Bucky.  "What happened in Albuquerque?"

Those on the provision run looked at Jade.

"I made a decision," she said.  "I set up a display at the market to show the Children of Adam followers the truth.  I had God punish me for being a false prophet by giving up my gift.  I'm normal now."

"What do you mean a display?" asked Bucky, his face reddening and his voice rising.  "Would someone tell me what exactly happened?"

Dr. Strange cleared his throat.  "I put on a little show portraying the man upstairs while Wanda changed Jade's brain to neutralize her abilities," he said, looking Bucky in the eyes.  "Before you get angry, this is what she wanted, Bucky.  She made the decision.  We just implemented it."

"Jade, why?" asked Bucky.  "Why would you do this and not tell me?"

"Because you wouldn't let me," answered Jade.  "You would talk me out of it."

"You're damn right I would," he replied.  "You know how I feel about mind manipulation and you just let them change you, without asking me first?"

"Guys," said Steve diplomatically.  "Maybe you need to take this to your quarters, away from everybody.  Please."

Bucky glared at him then grabbed Jade's hand and pulled her away from everyone.  He pulled her to their suite and closed the door before saying anything.  He turned to her and his eyes flashed with anger.

"Why would you do that?" Bucky yelled at her.  "You never even talked to me about it.  Just went ahead and did it!"

"It's my body, my mind," she yelled back.  "You don't own me, you know."

"I know that," he said sarcastically.  "But you never once mentioned any of this.  You never told me anything."

"I did tell you!" she yelled.  "When I got back after the first test.  I never wanted this gift, especially when the followers wouldn't leave me alone.  Your answer was to ask me to go to the city.  Some help that was."

She was sitting on the couch, her arms folded in front of her body, defensive in look and tone.  Bucky sat next to her and tried to take her hand but she wasn't having it.  He stood up and in a fit of anger spoke.

"You can be a pretty selfish bitch sometimes," he said with venom, then his face softened.  "I'm sorry, that was unacceptable.  I take it back."

She angrily shook her head.  "No, you meant it," she said.  "You know what?  The queen told me you would leave.  She obviously knew you better than I do so maybe you should leave.  I don't want to talk to you right now.  I'll talk to you later."

Standing up she went into the bedroom, slamming the door.  He paced back and forth wondering if he should go in there then left to find Steve.  In the bedroom Jade fully expected Bucky to come in after her and when he didn't she wondered if she had overreacted.  Arguing without her abilities was weird.  She had no real way of reading people without the edge her abilities had given her.  For the first time since she did it she second guessed her decision to give up her gift.  Maybe she should talk to her mother.  Standing up she left the bedroom, then the suite to find Ma.

"Bucky, it's just an argument," said Steve, alone now in the common room.  "Your parents had them.  You say stupid things then you kiss and make up.  Go back and apologize."

"No, she told me to leave, I'm leaving," he replied.  "We'll have to go to New York now anyways to test this process there, so I'm just going now."

"How are you getting there?"  asked Steve.  "The quinjet is still being used for missions.  The cars are still needed here."

"The motorcycle," said Bucky.  "Sheriff Peters says they are still there for us.  I'm going to take him up on his offer and take the Norton.  I know how to fix it if it has problems.  There's enough gas for it to go a long ways and I can be in New York in a few days.  Say goodbye to everyone for me.  I'll see you at Avengers HQ when you get there."

Bucky got up, went to the suite and saw the bedroom door was open.  He found his back pack and rolled up some clothes into it.  His jean jacket was on the chair and he almost packed it but instead he left it as it would make his back pack too bulky.  Steve would make sure the rest of his stuff made it to New York.  He looked at the bed and, for a moment, almost changed his mind.  Then he stepped out and saw Ben.

"Where are you going, Bucky?" asked the boy, his eyes fearful.  "You're leaving, aren't you?

"Sorry, kid," said Bucky.  "Your mom and I, we didn't work out.  She told me to leave.  I have to go to New York for the Avengers so I'm just going a few days early to clear my head."

Ben nodded his head.  "She'll miss you, so will I."

"Come here, Ben," said Bucky, gently, pulling the boy into a hug.  "You're a great kid and I'm going to miss you.  I would like to come back but your mom and I aren't seeing eye to eye right now.  We need some time apart.  You take good care of her and Ma, okay?"

Ben nodded but couldn't look at Bucky.  With a pained expression on his face Bucky hugged him again and kissed him on the top of his head before leaving.  He went to the armoury and took a handgun, some clips, and a rifle that he could attach to the back pack.  When he returned to the common room Strange was there and he asked for a portal to the cult compound in Albuquerque.  Dr. Strange looked at Steve and he nodded reluctantly.  The portal opened, Bucky walked through and the portal closed.

Jade was sitting on the bed, crying into her mother's shoulder.  "Did I make a mistake not asking for his input?" she sniffed.  "He was mad, Ma.  Called me a selfish bitch, then took it back."

"It was an argument," said Ma.  "People say things in the heat of the moment and regret it after.  Did you accept his retraction?"

"No, I told him to leave," she replied.  "Ma, you don't think...."

In a panic Jade ran to the suite and found Ben, sitting on the couch crying.  "Why did you tell him to leave, Mom?" sobbed her son.  "He's gone.  Packed some clothes and left.  He's going to New York."

"Oh shit," whispered Jade.  "I didn't mean for him to leave for good, just to leave the room.  I have to find him."

She ran out to the common room and asked Steve where Bucky was.  "He took a portal to Albuquerque," he replied.  "Then taking one of the motorcycles from there and riding to New York."

"Send me there," she cried.  "I have to stop him, tell him it was a mistake.  Please."

"He left 20 minutes ago," replied Steve.  "He's already on the highway by now.  Dr. Strange left as well so there's no way to bring up a portal.  I'm sorry."

He stood up to hug her when he saw her bury her face in her hands.  Her whole body shook in a paroxysm of crying so overwhelming that he lifted her in his arms and took her to her bedroom.  Ma was there and said she would take over, thanking Steve. 

My lover's gone

his boots no longer by my door

he left at dawn

and as I slept I felt him go

My Lover's Gone by Dido

It had been two weeks since Bucky left and two days since everyone but Bruce left via quinjet for Avengers HQ in New York.  Before he left early that morning, Steve brought Buddy to Jade on a leash.

"It's going to be really hectic for us for a while," he said regretfully.  "Would you take Buddy and keep him?  I think he will be happier here than in the city."

She had taken the leash then had emotionally hugged Steve.  "Look after Bucky," she said.  "I didn't want him to leave, not the way he did.  I still love him."

Steve had nodded then had hugged Ma and Ben.  His goodbye to Bruce had also been emotional, as they had been friends for a long time.  They had hugged for a while, saying quiet words between them, until Steve pulled away and left.

"They asked me if I wanted to stay and continue my research in a nice quiet isolated place," Bruce told Jade later that day at lunch.  "It's exactly what I want.  I only need one vehicle so if you want to use the other, it's yours, I guess.  Stay here as long as you want."

"Thanks Bruce," said Jade.  "We'll stay for a while but it's a bit too isolated for us.  Are you okay if we forage for gemstones and make some money so we can buy our own place?  We'll take the horses as well, if I can talk that outfitter into lending us his trailer again."

Bruce nodded.  He could tell she was still hurting after the break up.  Now that networks and the internet were coming online again since the tactics to destroy the Others had already proved adaptable in wet locations he had some contact from Steve.  He reported that Bucky hadn't yet arrived at HQ.  For a 109 year old man he acted like a teenager sometimes, impulsive, inflexible, and emotional.  It was a shame, really, as they were a good couple until they weren't.

For a couple of days, Ma and Jade went out on the horses every day foraging for gemstones.  Buddy would follow them, exploring as they searched for treasure.  Everyday they came back with a saddle bag each full of good pieces they could work on.  On the third day Ma was going to call it quits when she saw a little glint of something.  Getting off of Apple, the chestnut mare, she went down on her knees and brushed away the debris from where she saw the glint of gold.  It was a nugget, a big gold nugget.  Putting her hand on it to lift it out revealed it was heavier than she thought and she realized there was more to it than what showed on the surface.  Using her hands she pulled away the dirt and realized she had discovered something big, really big.  She pressed her comms piece.

"Hey Bruce," she called.  "Are you busy at the moment?  Do you think you can come out with a vehicle to my comms GPS coordinates?  Bring a shovel."

Half an hour later Bruce had arrived, dug up the rest of the nugget, mostly gold, partly quartz and needing both of them to lift it into the car's trunk.  They looked some more where they had found it but there was no quartz vein nearby.  It was just stuck out there by itself.

"That's a hell of a nugget," said Bruce.  "I wonder if it landed there after the queen or a nest exploded.  I don't know what the going price of gold is but that's worth a fortune."

"Is it mine, or is this Avenger land?" asked Ma.  "I mean, everything else we found before this we kept as ours, although we used what we made from it to pay for food and stuff.  But this.  Bruce, I could buy a property with just this."

He let out a big breath.  "Yeah, you could," he said, looking away.  "I'd miss you, Kathy.  But you have to do what's right for your family."

He wasn't looking at her but she looked at him with a new eye.  "You never called me Kathy before," she replied, then a light turned on in her head.  "Bruce, do you like me?"

Nervously, he looked down and ran a hand through his hair.  "Well, you've grown on me," he said.  "Hell, I don't even how to do this anymore."

"I would stay, Bruce," she said gently, "but Jade and Ben need a normal place to live, with real windows, and a garden, a place that's theirs.  This place belongs to the Avengers.  It's where we took shelter."

"If I can arrange a portal from Strange would you visit?" he asked.  "You, mostly, but all of you if you want."

"Yeah, I would visit," she said finally.  "It's been a long time for me as well."

Awkwardly Bruce leaned forward and hugged her, then just as awkwardly stepped back. 

"I'll drive this back," he said.  "We can drive to town together in the morning and see how much this thing is worth, if you want the company."

She watched him as he drove carefully back to the Bunker then mounted Apple.  The man was full of surprises but she did like him.   As she rode back she saw Jade and Ben on Cherry and Butch.  They came over to her and asked how the hunt had been.

"Well, I found a boyfriend and a big gold nugget," she said.  "Right now, I'm not sure which one pleases me more."

"Who's the boyfriend?" asked Ben.  "There's only Bruce out here ... Ma, are you in love with Bruce?"

"At my age?" she said.  "I don't know if I would call it love but definitely like."

"You're only 55," said Jade.  "Still young enough, Ma.  The nugget, how big."

"I had to call Bruce to come and dig it up and it took both of us to lift it into the trunk," said Ma.  "I think it's enough to buy a property."

The next morning Ma, Bruce and Ben took the long drive to the assay office in Albuquerque.  It was a large specimen and there was enough gold for Ma to talk to a realtor.  Since paper money wasn't in circulation yet the assayers office wrote and had notarized a promissory note.  They asked where it had been found and Ma truthfully told them she hadn't thought to mark down the GPS coordinates.  Bruce did say it was found where one of the queens had been destroyed and the man speculated they had blown it off of a rich quartz vein.  The word would soon go out to gold hunters to search the sites of destroyed nests for the valuable metal.

On the way back Bruce drove into the outfitters yard and was just as disgusted as the others at the state of the slaughterhouse.  He asked to borrow the horse trailer and at first the owner tried to price gouge them.  Ma fixed a steely stare at him.

"You're the man who set up the Avengers so the Children of Adam could kidnap my daughter, aren't you?" she demanded.

He averted his eyes and mumbled an apology.  "You know they carved her arm up, cut the brachial artery," she said angrily.  "She could have died because of you."

"Fine, I'm sorry," he said.  "Take the damn trailer.  Keep it, in fact.  Now that things are starting to get back to normal no one wants horse meat anymore.  I don't need it."

Bruce leaned forward so his face was close to the owner's face.  "You know what I turn into when I get angry, right?"  he said softly but dangerously.  Ma flashed an image of The Hulk in the man's mind.  "If I were you I would release all these wild horses so that I didn't get more angry than I already feel." 

The man backed up, fear on his face.  "Come on, Bruce," said Ma.  "Let's hook up the trailer and get the hell out of this horrible place."

On the drive back Ma looked at Bruce as he drove.  "I could kiss you right now," she said. 

He looked at her, pulled over and stopped the car, then leaned over and kissed Ma firmly.  "I've wanted to do that for a while," he said.  "That felt good.  The kiss, I mean."

She smiled.  "Bruce, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship," said Ma.

"Kathy, I think so, too," he said smiling.

"Um, you two know I'm sitting here in the back seat, right?" asked Ben, who had just witnessed everything.

"Jesus, kid," said Bruce, holding his chest.  "You scared me.  I forgot you were there.  Well, now you know that I like your grandma."

"Fine with me," he said.  "You guys going to have sex?"

Ma laughed while Bruce looked like he was ready to have a stroke.  "No comment, kid," he said, smiling at Ma.

Two days later the realtor phoned.  Both Ma and Bruce looked at the phone while it rang since it hadn't the whole time either of them had been there.  Bruce answered it and handed it to Ma.  The realtor asked if she was interested in seeing a place near Santa Fe that met all of her criteria.  He would even charter a helicopter to pick her up.  That afternoon the four of them piled into the helicopter, which thrilled Ben immensely, and landed on a homestead owned by an older couple who successfully rode out the Other's occupation of the surrounding land.  It had solar panels for power, a gas powered generator for the air conditioner, a deep well and cistern, was far enough away from the highway for privacy but close enough to Santa Fe that they didn't feel isolated.  There was room for the horses, with a large shed that could shelter them.  Three bedrooms on the main floor with room to put a fourth bedroom in the attic, if she wished.  There was also a garden and a pergola for shade.  The phone was working and once the internet came back up in that area they could easily hook up as the federal government was giving grants to get people connected again.  Ma made an offer, it was accepted and the couple said they could be out in a week as they were going to live with their daughter who had also survived the occupation but now needed help with her three kids.  The promissory note was produced as proof of payment and a lawyer provided by the realtor took care of creating a new promissory note with the balance of the gold on it. 

That night they had the last bonfire with just the four of them.  Ben and Jade went to bed around 10 pm leaving Ma and Bruce behind.  Early in the morning Ben went to Ma's room and entered the code.  She wasn't there and he returned to his suite, telling his mother that Ma wasn't in her room.  Jade smiled and told him it was alright.  In a week they would move and start on the next part of their life, just the three of them.  He crawled into bed with her just like he used to when he was little and she told him stories of his dad until they both fell asleep again.

>>Chapter 13

Series Masterlist

If you liked this chapter please like, comment or reblog.

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #buckybarnes original female character #steve rogers #sam wilson #alien invasion #idiots in love #breakup

[multiverse-sparkles]

Your kiss is burning to my skin — S. Rogers and B. Barnes.

summary: steve and bucky break up with you to focus on their relationship. at first, you took the breakup hard. then you took it worse.

pairings: steve x reader x bucky, stucky x reader.

warnings: angst, language, mentions of violence, poly.

chapter one

“it has nothing to do with you, doll.” bucky reiterates, tone mellowing into a small hesitant whisper as he sees you flinch at the endearment. “i mean you were wonderful and so lovely; always understanding us, being the pillar for support and providing us, always with positive reinforcements.” steve squeezes his hand as his form of support, as if willing bucky to take strenght from him to continue his words as he stutters.

the tender moment was not missed by your gaze that were intent on the supersoldiers who sat at the sofa infront of you. the parallels already evident; steve and bucky, leaning to eachother for comfort, sitting in one sofa. the only distance in the room were with you and them; sat in the lone one seater, listening with bated breath to their reasons on why they were breaking your heart.

you could guess several other scenarios happening when you returned from the three week mission requiring radio silence; a breakup was not one of them.

you were happy. the last time you saw either of them, you three went on a romantic date followed by a passionate night spent in eachother's loving arms. the next day was a tearful exchange of goodbye's and unwillingness to part; bucky had almost begged to be included, knowing what the mission entailed. steve inteded to be more diplomatic and barter with tony who refused to budge on his stance.

so with a heavy heart, you departed to cold and frigid terrorist base along with natasha and sam, throwing yourself into your duties in order to come home soonest. even with the support and extensive planning aswell as research, it still took a considerable amount of time.

but not enough for a drastic change of heart— or so you thought.

the steely and determined gaze to steve, the way bucky could look at you in the eyes despite shifting in his seat; they were fucking serious. and intent on expressing their disatisfaction with your current arrangement. one that was implicitly expressed as you trek to your floor, and sat you down after an almost hostile welcome.

“this hurts us more than you.” bucky exhales, looking at steve.

“i doubt it.” the first words you spoke amid all these crazy tirade sounded weak, from disuse and the emotions welling up in your throat. “but please, by all means, don't let me interrupt. why now?”

“we have been talking and spending time with eachother.. unconsciously, we thought about... how we missed it when it was just us.”

you flinch. again. in the field you were almost fearless, and not even a flying knife can make you swerve— you'd catch the weapon whizing to the air with precise movements. turns out, words indeed cut deeper.

but all the more of the implication that it had been them first; and the way it sounded, you were an unwelcomed participant into the special connection they shared.

“but this is not to say we don't value you.” steve intones. “we do. you have to know that. you're special in your own way, but bucky and i have something deeper than just flesh.”

you bite your tongue to refrain from lashing out. as a coping mechanism, you entertain the anger for his fucking audacity. letting the rage simmer under the blank farce you currently wear.

“we just hope, we can focus on eachother more.” steve elaborates, tensing the slightest at your emotionless response. to be frank, both men were ready for a fight, for you to scream and be hysterical. but you were surprisingly calm and collected. which made both uneasy.

“we just want to fall inlove again, without worrying about, others.” he refers you as others now. “could be permanent, could be a thought in passing.” bucky says. “the only thing we're certain about is a break.” he evasively looks away.

“i guess what bucky and i are trying to say is that, we want more from eachother, and there are certain deeper connections that we can't sustain in a three-way relationship.” steve informs you.

“i respect that.” you run your clammy hands on your tactical gear, they couldn't wait until you were dressed and atleast fed before shoving flowery words on your throat. “but if you're breaking up with me, say it bluntly; tell me honestly, tell it in words i understand- you were a good lay but it's actually eachother we love.” you enunciate the word slowly, “and don't delude me with kind words, when i know you're going to dangle the very statements you spewed over my head, most likely in days when you're fucked up or too lonely for eachother. i will not be tripped into your bed ever again.”

you despised the words as soon as they left your mouth; the statements only providing to fuel your deepest insecurity. and it was unfair to both of them, you knew it was.

steve and bucky looked visibly wretched by your words, yet you ignore it, telling yourself to get used to not caring about either of them.

“doll”

“darling”

“don't fucking call me that.” you hiss, both men still in their seat. “we're done.” gathering whatever was left of your dignity, you trudge to the doors and out of their lives.

the door closed behind you, your own apartment looking stale as opposed to the home you have built with steve and bucky; you barely stayed here anyways, but kept it for storage reasons. it still had stark's touch, feeling more like a hotel penthouse, appearing cold and detatched.

you slide down against the door weakly, losing the false bravado infront of your ex lovers. as if a child, you hug your knees to your chest, sobbing into it unbashedly.

three years all down the drain. and they talked about it as if it were a skin deep connection, downplaying every single moment; in tenderness, in affection, in tears and the joy.

you didn't lie down with them in their bed as an extension, as a woman that can be tossed in passing.

you didn't hold them gently in your arms, and provided the warmth the world has chosen to keep from them just to be a stranger.

you didn't whisper words of comfort in their ears, in the middle of the night when the nightmares became too much to handle, just to be someone shallow and unimportant in their lives.

most importantly, you didn't love them to be hurt like this.

the pain cuts deep in your heart, like a throbbing wound, one you feel physically; one that leaves you gasping for breath, a hand held above your heart, feeling as if you could die. your chest tight, your throat welling up, you struggle to remain above ground, eyes darting around the room to keep in the moment- fuck, you were having a panic attack.

you despised when that happens. hated the sheer fact that you would allow yourself to be vulnerable when there were things that needed to be done; people that need saving, reports to be made, meetings to attend. you led a remotely chaotic life and the only thing that truly anchored you in here, to the now, turned their backs to you.

they no longer want you.

you swallowed heavily, arms instinctively hugging yourself, eyes squinting in an an attempt at concentration; color, you looked at your surroundings, dizzily naming the grey of your couch, the ivory white lamp, the silver and gold of the chandelier. your forehead was beaded with perspiration, breath coming out in shorts despite your attempts at distracting yourself.

“agent y/n, your blood pressure is fluctuating; your heart rate is abnormal which can cause the brain and other ogans to become oxygen deprived. i concluded a physical scan and deduced your emotional distress," FRIDAY “i'm at liberty to ask if i should call captain rogers and sergeant barnes, as they are—”

“no!” you managed to shout between strangled breaths, patting your chest methodolically hoping whatever it was, seemingly dislodged into your airways be cleared.

“agent y/n, in accordance to the tower's protoccol, i am hardwired to inform your immediate contacts of your current state of distress.” her posh voice inserts. and despite yourself, you groan.

“i'm peachy, fri.” you lean your head back to the door, closing your eyes and focusing on your breathing. slowly, you were able to calm down enough, “it's probably the best time to change those emergency contacts, aswell. while you're at it, remove the captain and sergeant's access to this floor; both physically and even in information.”

“ofcourse, agent y/n. please state your official badge number and code.” when you answer her, FRIDAY appears to repeat your command before doing what was asked.

“i also elected the sensible decision of reinstating agent romanov as your primary emergency contact. that being said, ms. romanov is on the way to your floor.” FRIDAY disappears before you can scold her, which made you truly contemplate wether she was conscious and, in all actuality sensitive to human emotions.

perhaps, she does have an inkling of human relationships and intense emotions, but that was no longer your concern; considering you have a black widow shaped problem coming your way. and natasha romanov was nothing, if not immensely stubborn and perpetually perceptive. you were several times screwed over.

however, as she appeared in your doorway, the waterworks resumed ten times over, and you were sobbing pathetically in the red head's arms, lamenting your broken heart.

you couldn't remember for how long you've stayed immobile in your room, but it had been several days; perhaps a week or two that you cried your heart out, barely consuming meals unless for sustenance. that in itself seemed like a chore for your aching muscle, your tired and weary bones protesting with every single movements.

this morning though... this morning, it was sunny and bright. you'd opened the curtains with much effort, peering into the bustling city; the skyline providing you with displaced warmth. a few years ago, you'd only ever dreamt about being in new york; and you've lived it. becoming an avenger was also a dream you've worked hard in achieving, and here you are, fighting alongside the heroic and brave on normal tuesdays.

should you allow yourself to wither away in a dark room, heart terribly battered and bruised when the world was set for conquering? well, perhaps it would be insensitive to use the c word; cringing to yourself upon the remembrance of several otherplanetary creatures wreaking havoc on your home planet, like it were a free for all.

you enjoyed the warmth of the sun on your skin for a few moments, allowing yourself to finally, breathe. you bask in the first time upon weeks that you thought positively for a change; so wreaked from questioning every single thing wrong about you.

for the first time in many days, you took the longest shower in history, setting the temperature just a touch scalding. you cleaned your room, changed the sheets, and donned yourself in a decent jeans and a t-shirt combo. grabbing your purse, and stuffing your phone, wallet and keys along with you, you departed from your room.

on the way to the garage, you texted both wanda and natasha; who have been at your side with the outmost vigor, crying and cursing both the supersoldiers as you wept from your broken heart.

you: mall and galiani's at the grove? :)

wands: yes!! meet you there <3

natty: otw in my sensible shoes.

you smiled softly, thankful for your friends. it may have spread like wildfire among your colleagues in the tower, and the magic six may have taken sides and pointed fingers; but amongst all the drama, you were glad that you had people to count on.

it may take a while for you to feel like yourself again... but you were willing to make it work.

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes x fem!reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky x you #bucky barnes #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x female reader #steve rogers x fem!reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers #stucky x reader #stucky x y/n #stucky x you #stucky

[holylulusworld]

A different kind of Valentine

Summary: Your fiancé breaks your heart on Valentine’s Day out of all days.

Pairing: former!(any male character) x fem!Reader, Mafia!Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Warnings: angst, break-up, mentions/implied cheating, making out with a stranger, language, drinking, tipsy reader, a little fluff

Promises shouldn’t be broken.

Promises are meant to be kept. Right?

Love should be strong and unbreakable. If you swear to someone that you love and adore them, you cannot take it back so easily.

How could your fiancé take the words he whispered lovingly not months ago back?

“I can’t do this anymore,” he replied coolly when you asked why his suitcases were standing in the hallways. You believed he must go on yet another business trip.

That he wants to leave you never crossed your mind.

How foolish of you to believe that he wants to stay and keep his promises.

Shell-shocked you watched him grab your hand to slide his grandmother’s ring off of your finger.

You couldn’t think, speak, or even whimper. All you saw was the man you loved turn his back on you.

He stuffed the ring into his pocket, murmuring someone else’s name under his breath. You knew the name. Once in a while, he mentioned his assistant.

Of course, he had to turn your breakup into a cliché. He had to bang his secretary and leave you for a younger model.

If not for the tears running down your face, and the heaviness in your heart, you’d laugh at the fucked-up situation. It felt like you ended up in a bad rom-com slash comedy movie. The only difference was people weren’t laughing at the bad joke your life turned into.

“You can’t be serious,” oh, you finally found your voice. “Why are you doing this? Did you get bored? Is it the wedding? We could’ve talked things out.”

“That’s not it.” He grunted in your direction.

“Is she prettier? Better in bed,” you got angrier and louder. “Does she like it up her ass? Is it that?” You threw the next best things at him, making a scene. “What is it? Huh? Is her cunt squeezing your tighter?”

“You’re just not it!” He bit back and threw his hands up in surrender. “Can you not do this right now? How about you don’t throw a tantrum? People break up all the time!”

“Five years and that’s all I get?” You yelled. “I deserve better than a lame excuse! I want to know what happened to us!”

“I love her because I don’t love you anymore!” He yelled back, making you flinch at his outburst. “It’s not only that the sex is better. She’s all I ever wanted in a woman. You got too comfortable and want to cuddle on the sofa instead of going out and blowing me off behind a bar.”

“What?” You huffed. “I was the one trying to drag you off the couch! You only ever went out with your buddies.” He ignored your tears, and that your voice cracked. “I guess this never mattered. You had to fulfill the cliché. So, go ahead. We will see if she can make you happy.”

You stormed toward the door, blindly grabbing your keys and phone. It was impossible to stand there, staring at the gifts you placed on the coffee table in the living room.

“If you are still here when I come back, I’ll stab you right in the face,” you looked over your shoulder at the man who used to be your moon and stars. “If you touch my shit, you are a dead man. I will find you and your whore and turn you into dog food.”

“Another one,” you slammed the glass down onto the bar counter. “Make it a double.” You placed fifty bucks onto the empty glass. “No, give me the bottle. I think I’ll drink it at home.”

“We don’t sell the bottle for you to take it home,” the bartender gruffly replied.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” You glared at the burly guy. “I can drink the whole bottle at the bar, but I can’t pay for it and take it home?” Quirking a brow, you look at the man.

“House rules.”

“Fuck this,” you grabbed the fifty bucks and stuffed the money into your bra. “I’ll get more at the next liquor store. Fuck you, and all of you.”

“All of us?” The bartender asked with amusement.

Storming out of the bar you huffed again. “Fuck Valentine’s Day.” You muttered and walked away, almost running a guy over.

You glared at him and bared your teeth.

“Assholes with a ding-dong between their legs. You are all the same. Useless and worthless…”

“Hey, watch your step, doll,” the guy snickered when you threw your clutch at him. “Ouch, what do you think you are doing?” The man caught your clutch just in time.

“Fuck you too!” You poked two fingers into his chest. “You are no better than the bartender and my lovely fiancé. All of you are useless and have a limp dick. No man is worth my time.”

You snatched the clutch out of the man’s hands. “Language, lady,” he said, his voice now dangerously low. “If you don’t watch your tongue, someone might teach you some manners.”

“Oh, and you are that kind of man,” you slapped him across the face with your clutch. “Who do you think you are?” Usually, you wouldn’t attack a stranger in the dead of the night, but you were a little tipsy, and still mad because of the events of the day. “Threatening a woman.”

“Sweet cheeks,” he said while rubbing his face. It was still red from the slap, and he considered his next step. “I wouldn’t dare to raise my hand against you.” The man stepped closer to grab your clutch. “I said—” He grabbed you by your throat and slammed you against the wall, “I’ll teach you a lesson.”

“I’ll scream,” you began to race. Maybe you messed with the wrong guy. “Get off me.”

“Yeah, you will scream,” he smirked darkly and leaned closer to whisper in your ear. “I’ll make you scream my name, doll. So, what will it be? Do you want me to make you scream, or do you want me to make you whimper my name?”

“That’s not a choice!” You complained. “I have had enough of selfish men believing they can toy with me and my heart. I’ll cut yours out if you dare to touch me.”

“A cocky one,” he dropped his hand from your throat and pressed his hand against the wall, right next to your head. “Tell me, doll. Who hurt such a sweet girl?” He looked you up and down, hungrily roaming your body with his eyes.

“He—” You looked away and blinked a few times. “You’re not my therapist, and I’m not your problem.”

“You made it my problem when you attacked me because a douchebag hurt you. So, again. Who hurt you, doll?”

God, he smelled so good, and his lips tenderly pressed against your earlobe. You didn’t know what got into you, but you grasped for the stranger, taking him by supposed when you pressed your lips to his.

His hands grabbed your face, gently cradling it while he allowed you to dominate the kiss. “Doll,” he murmured against your lips. “You’re a little drunk, huh?”

“Make me forget about him,” you pleaded and fisted his jacket. “Here and now. Come on. Don’t be all talk.”

“I’d love to make you scream my name.” He pecked your lips twice. “I love me a crazy girl hitting me at first sight but, I won’t take advantage of you. You’re hurt, drunk, and a little lost. Let me take you home.”

“I don’t even know your name,” you gasped and stepped back. “I just kissed a stranger and asked him to fuck me. What’s wrong with me?”

“Nothing is wrong with you, doll,” his features softened. “It’s alright. I’m a nice guy.” He smirked and laughed as you stepped back again. “My name is Bucky, okay. I’ll take you home if you want me to. Or I could call a cab for you.”

“Y/N,” you murmured your name, embarrassed about your actions. “Sorry. I didn’t want to attack you…or kiss you…or ask you to fuck me.”

“Y/N,” Bucky hummed. “A very nice name.” He said. “For an even nicer woman.” Holding out his hand Bucky waited for you to take it. “I won’t bite, promised.”

“Maybe I like it when you bite me,” you challenged him.

“Let’s stick to getting the alcohol out of your system,” Bucky wrapped his arm around your shoulders when you didn’t take his hand. “Doll, you shouldn’t stay here. We started on the wrong foot, but I’m not a bad guy.”

“What the shit!” You exclaimed loudly while you looked around your apartment. “That bastard had the guts to unpack the gifts I got him before leaving our home to bang that bitch.”

“Hmm…that him?” Bucky lifted one of your picture frames. “He looks like a douchebag. I was right.”

“Why did you come with me again?” You glanced over your shoulder at the stranger in your home. “I’m good. Really.”

“I won’t leave a pretty dame in need alone on Valentine’s Day,” Bucky said. “Not after that man left you for some other woman.”

“I’m fine,” you lied. “Just…mad.” You shrugged. “I had the whole day planned; you know. Dinner at our favorite restaurant, the perfect gift, and naughty underwear to…” You shook your head.

“His loss,” Bucky shrugged while looking at one of the gift bags on the table. “It should’ve been him making big plans for Valentine’s Day. If you love your lady, you spoil her.”

“He found someone prettier and sexier,” you sniffled. “He told me so. The man I loved fell in love with his secretary because he doesn’t love me anymore.”

“Again, his loss,” he stepped closer to look inside the gift bag, taking the lingerie out. “Red lace, huh?”

“He liked red…” You snatched the underwear out of Bucky’s hands. “I wanted to turn him on. It’s been a while since he was interested in doing more than sleep in our bedroom.”

“I’d say white suits you more,” Bucky threw the lingerie over his shoulder. “How about you change into your favorite outfit, and I invite you for dinner. No strings attached, doll.”

“You want to take me out?” You questioned.

“Please let me take you out,” he stepped closer to grab your hand. “You deserve to spend this day with someone who cares.”

“You don’t even know me.”

“Yet,” he said. “Let me get to know you, please.”

You nodded and agreed to go out for dinner with Bucky. It was a risk, but one you were willing to take.

Valentine reloaded

Tags in reblog.

#bucky barnes #mafia au #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x female reader #A different kind of Valentine

[gutsby]

Daryl Dixon

Dead Ringer

Weeks of separation and sexual frustration come to a head when Daryl pays you a visit in the middle of the night. Whether it's the product of your own sex-deprived subconscious or reality, you can't be sure—and couldn't care less. Daryl wants to fulfill the fantasy any way he can.

Easy Street

You steal a cop car and almost run Daryl over en route to the Sanctuary. You can’t decide if you want to fight him, fuck him, or bring him back to Negan. Lucky for you, Daryl is game for all three.

Nighthawk

You decide to bring Spencer to the neighborhood Halloween bash to take your mind off your breakup with Daryl. Your ex isn't so easily convinced of your intentions and decides there's no better place than his motorcycle to show you just how much he misses you.

Cherry Pie

You know virtually nothing about sex, and Daryl’s done it all. Together, you take on an impromptu anatomy lesson, and you learn that Daryl has a lot more to teach you than what’s covered in the textbooks.

Walker Bait

An unforeseen foray into a sex shop leaves you and Daryl trapped between a plastic cock and a hard place as a herd of walkers closes in. Angry sex ensues.

Grow a Uterus and We’ll Talk

Daryl has a bad case of baby fever, to put it lightly. You’re practically terrified of children. Rick lends you his kid for the night, and together, you come to learn that parenthood might not be the worst thing in the world. Even easier than baking muffins, one might say.

Honey Trap

You’ve been tasked with two simple jobs: infiltrate Alexandria’s community and bring intel back to your boss by any means necessary. When your entry point into the group takes the form of a familiar blue-eyed archer, you expect this to be your easiest gig yet—that is, until your prey decides to hunt you back.

Pregnant Pause

Babymaking is a bit trickier than anticipated, and months have passed with no sign of pregnancy. When your period finally doesn’t show up on time, you and Daryl act fast and head straight for the pharmacy—and get a little caught up along the way.

Mr. Dixon

Your efforts to seduce the DILF next door have all failed spectacularly, so you decide a wet hot car wash in front of his house is in order. Mr. Dixon is less than impressed with your antics and plans to teach you a lesson in good manners and ‘neighborliness.’

I’m a Good Girl, Officer!

Apparently flashing your tits to truckers on the freeway is frowned upon in small towns like yours. When three familiar King County cops take charge of the case, you learn they punish bad girls a little differently.

Playing Dangerous

Working undercover in a seedy part of town, homicide detective Daryl sees you in your skimpy club attire and mistakes you for a hooker. A wrongful arrest makes for a funny way to foreplay, but you’re still game.

Fake It Til You Make It (Or Drown)

Daryl finds out you faked an orgasm. Instead of getting mad, he decides to get even.

Best Served Cold

Since your fiancé can’t seem to keep his hands off of Lori, you decide Daryl is the perfect way to make him pay. Revenge sex has never felt so good.

Bucky Barnes

Wedded Bliss (Mob!Bucky)

The marriage was arranged, and the sex is deranged. Bucky is so obsessed with your pussy that he almost forgets he’s meant to be faking this whole thing—and hating it, like sworn enemies are supposed to do.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

Joel Miller

Waiting Game (dbf!Joel)

Joel has mastered the art of self-control in all areas except one: not fucking his friend’s daughter. A cross-country road trip home from college takes a hard turn when he’s forced to share a motel room with you.

Part 1 | Part 2

Homemade: While your dad’s watching a movie downstairs, you and his best friend decide to make one of your own. (part of the Waiting Game 'verse, just not a direct sequel/prequel to anything idk what to call it!!)

Cabin Fever (Dark!Joel x Dark!Reader) [DEAD DOVE]

Joel saves your life, but help comes at a price.

Finders Keepers (bfd!Joel)

Something about the sun in Cabo San Lucas and your best friend’s father’s sweaty body makes you a horny mess. When you find an old shirt of his lying around, you can’t resist. When Mr. Miller finds you humping a pillow and moaning his name, neither can he.

Coming Soon:

Bite the Bullet

Back at the prison, new recruits have been showering you with gifts. One of these presents doesn’t sit quite right with Daryl, and he decides it’s time to let the men know just how he feels—and who you belong to.

Atlantic City

A very drunk Daryl meets a stripper in Jersey and wastes no time putting a ring on her finger. With the late, great Elvis Presley presiding, the two get hitched in a slipshod ceremony a couple weeks before the world descends into chaos. This marriage may be short-lived, but damn if the honeymoon won’t be one to remember.

Quiet on Set (Norman Reedus x Reader)

Filming a sex scene is no easy feat, especially when it’s with your least favorite costar in the Walking Dead franchise. Push comes to shove and a fake fuck turns to a hatefuck real quick—no cameras needed.

Requests are open!

[navybrat817]

Reconnect AU

Pairing: Best Friend!Bucky Barnes x Reader

AU Summary: Bucky Barnes is your best friend. You're also in love with him. After his recent breakup, the two of you get a chance to reconnect during a weeklong vacation together. Is it long enough to get your happy ending?

AU Warnings: Light angst, friends reconnecting, unrequited feelings (or so you think), slight feels (it's me), "There was only one bed!", smut with feels, Bucky Barnes (yep, he's a warning), more to be added.

A/N: Welcome to my best friend!Bucky AU with Dreamboat and Butterfly. I hope you enjoy it. Please heed the warnings before each post and I will update as time allows. Banner and moodboard by yours truly. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!

🦋 - Where We Left Off

🦋 - When We First Met

🦋 - Waiting a Little Longer

🦋 - We'll Always be Friends

🦋 - Where Did the Time Go?

🦋 - We Don't Talk Anymore

🦋 - Wish, Hope, Dream

Love and thanks for reading! 💙

Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ Ko-Fi

#navybrat writes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes x female!reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #best friend!bucky barnes #best friend!bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes au #reconnect au #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan x female reader #sebastian stan x female!reader #sebastian stan x you #sebastian stan #dreamboat and butterfly

[buckyispunk]

Aloha

Aloha part one ~ Bucky Barnes x f!Reader (no use of Y/N), read part two here!

masterlist

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (no use of Y/N)

Summary: You arrive at a Hawaiian resort for your ex's wedding and a man named Bucky buys you a drink. You proceed to spend the next day with him, getting to know him and his friends.

A/N: New series! There will probably be five or so parts, with much more smut, angst, and fluff to come :) let me know if you'd like to be added to the tag list for this series!

Warnings: unwanted touching (not by Bucky), dom!bucky, unprotected PiV sex, creampie, spitting, choking, orgasm delay/denial, oral (f receiving), fingering, drinking, Bucky's got a filthy mouth

Word Count: 11k

Fucking Brock. You sit on the couch staring at the little cardstock rectangle in disbelief.

Join us in celebrating Brock and Marisssa’s special day! surrounded by hibiscus flowers and a tropical design. The flowery invitation theme makes sense when you read that the wedding is in Hawaii. 

You hadn’t seen Brock in years. Three, to be exact. It had been in the soup aisle of the grocery store.

You had been reaching for a can of tomato paste to make spaghetti to eat alone in your little apartment. You looked a mess, having stopped at the store on your way home from a long day of work. You heard him call your name - his nonchalant, egotistical voice recognizable anywhere. 

“Oh my god, how’ve you been? It’s been too long!” He had said, as if he had made any attempts to reach out to you - or had any desire to - since you had broken up. 

“Oh,” you turned around to face him, “fine, you?”

“I’m doing great! Just here to buy some soup for my girlfriend, she’s been under the weather lately.”

Not even a minute into conversation and he’d mentiioned his new girlfriend. You had just broken up two months before. You tried your best to keep the look of shock and sadness from your face. How had he moved on so quick? Did your almost four year relationship meant so little to him? 

You managed to give a small noncommittal smile and nod. He wasn’t paying enough attention to you to notice anyway, grabbing a couple of cans of chicken noodle soup and turning back the way he came. 

“We should get together and catch up sometime!” he had shouted over his shoulder as he walked away.

That was the last time you had seen him. It wasn’t like the two of you were on bad terms or anything. The break up had been civil - civil as a breakup can be, anyway. You and Brock had begun dating in your freshman year of college. One day, in the middle of you and Brock’s senior year, he sat you down and said he needed to talk to you. He said that you were great and he’d always have a special place in his heart for you, but he just couldn’t picture himself with you for the rest of his life - so there’s no point in wasting anymore time, as he had put it. To be honest, you didn’t disagree.

You had been unhappy towards the end of the relationship. You could tell that Brock was distancing himself and the two of you got in little fights almost every day. You knew it wasn’t going to work out, but it had still left a huge hole in your heart. Brock was a big part of your life every day for four years, then all of a sudden he was just gone. A big piece of you was missing and you had to rebuild it yourself. Turns out Brock rebuilt that piece with another girl. If he ever had a piece that needed rebuilding in the first place, that is. 

You really had wanted to stay friends with him after the breakup, or at least remain civil with him. He had never reached out after that day in the grocery store and you had no desire to reach out to him - you had healed yourself and decided you were better off without him. 

You sit on the couch running your fingers over the rough material, rereading the words over and over again, trying to make sense of it all. You really don’t care that Brock is getting married, it’s not like you want him back or anything. But, at the same time, you weren’t necessarily chomping at the bit to go watch him and his fiancee celebrate their special day. 

A vacation did sound nice, though. You’d always wanted to go to Hawaii. Plus, you figured some of you and Brock’s friends from college would be in attendance. The two of you had been in the same friend group when he asked you out. You lost touch with the friend group after the break up. You would see some of them in passing or in classes and share small talk, but you had stopped getting invitations to hang out with them. You weren’t one to hold a grudge, though, and it would be nice to see them again. 

You mull it over for a little while before deciding that it would be a good move on your part to go, show Brock that you were still on good terms with him and that him getting married doesn’t bother you. You could take a break from work and get some much-needed sun and relaxation. You RSVP and check no, you will not be bringing a plus one.  

The months leading up to the wedding follow the same, monotonous routine. Work, eat, sleep, repeat. Occasionally your coworkers would drag you out to the bar after work and you would go - desperate to feel some sort of belonging. Despite your efforts over the years, you had never gotten close with any of the girls at work. You got along with them okay, but you wouldn’t exactly call them your friends. Acquaintances was a more fitting term.

You do, however, have one best friend. The only issue is that she lives almost a thousand miles away. You had moved to New York for school and she had stayed back home in Illinois. You stay in contact with her and your family. Most days, talking to them makes you more homesick than anything else. You’d considered moving back more than once, but had ultimately decided against it each time - you’re scared to look like a failure. You don’t want to come running back home at the first signs of struggle. You want to prove to everyone back home that you can make it in the big city by yourself. 

As the days go by, you find yourself looking forward to the special day. Not because of the wedding, but because you’re ready to escape the numb hell that your life has become. The wedding is on a Friday. You’re flying in on Monday and leaving Sunday morning. Six nights at the tropical resort Brock and Marissa have picked. 

It’s the Sunday night before you leave. Your bags are packed and waiting by the door. Sleep comes easy, knowing that by this time tomorrow you’ll be drinking cocktailas at a pool-side bar, free from work stress and city traffic. Away from the city where you feel lonely among millions of people.

Usually when the ear-piercing, dread instilling sound of your alarm rings, you hit the snooze button and pull the covers tighter in attempt to hang on to your last moments of comfort and peace - or as close as you can get to that, these days. Today, however, is different. When you hear the all-too familiar noise coming from your phone, it leaves you with a feeling of excitement rather than depression. 

You sit up, smile on your face, and get ready for the day. After showering and putting on your comfiest plane clothes, you grab your bags and head outside. You hail a taxi and can’t even bring yourself to be upset when he doesn’t offer to help you with your luggage. You smile the whole way to the airport.

I repeat, flight DL4567 is delayed by two hours. Boarding will begin at 12:10.

The universe has found a way to put you in a bad mood again. You’re certain whatever higher power there is had sent this sudden thunderstorm just for you. You look at your phone to check the time - 9:45. You had been sitting here for an hour already. The hard chair is starting to get uncomfortable, so you decide to get your second cup of coffee for the morning. You stand and grab your luggage, making your way to the end of the Starbucks line. You order your go-to drink and some breakfast.

Once you get your coffee and food you find a little table to sit at and pull out your book. You find yourself enthralled in your book and the time flies. A voice over the loudspeaker breaks you out of your trance. 

Flight DL4567 now boarding. 

You snap your book shut and clean up your table. You grab your bags and head back to your gate. After waiting in line for a little while, you finally take your seat on the plane. You put in your earbuds and watch the grey clouds outside - thankful you got a window seat. By the time the plane starts moving, you’re smiling again and counting down the time until your arrival. 

You spend the first five hours of your flight reading and watching TV - you’re pleasantly surprised to see that they have your favorite show. Sometime after they serve lunch, you fall asleep. When you wake up, there’s only two hours left until arrival. 

You watch the fluffy clouds outside your window and find that time passes quickly when you think about all the things you want to do in Hawaii. You also find that the time passes impossibly slow when you let your mind drift to New York and all your responsibilities. How is it that you haven’t even landed in Hawaii yet and you’re already dreading returning back home?

You see the beaches and the luscious green that fill the ground beneath you. You take in all the sights as best you can as you get closer and closer to the ground, preparing for landing. Your ears hurt slightly from the pressure change, but you’ve got other things on your mind.

After waiting some more to get your luggage, you finally manage to get on a shuttle and you’re on your way to the resort. You watch the mountains in the distance and the palm trees on the drive. You’re listening to your playlist through your earbuds and this is the happiest you’ve felt in a while. You could get used to this, you think. 

Your jaw drops when you pull up to the hotel. The huge building is right on the beach. Sure, that’s what it had said online, but the real thing it’s even more staggering in person than it had been in the pictures. The sun beats down on you as soon as you step out of the shuttle, but there’s a nice breeze that makes it enjoyable. A worker hands you your bags from the back of the bus and you thank him. You roll them inside the resort, eyes widening even more when you see the inside of the place. You can’t wait to get your bags in your room and explore. 

The receptionist is nice as can be and tells you to enjoy your stay as she hands you your key cards - like you’ll be needing more than one. You wheel your luggage into the elevator and press the number five. You’re astonished by the view when you step into your room. Your balcony faces the beach and you can see mountains in the distance. The evening sun is still shining bright and there’s not a cloud in the sky. 

It’s just after seven o’clock by the time you’re done changing. You head down to the main floor and set off to explore. There’s a spa, an indoor and outdoor bar, a pool, a hot tub, a gym, and a restaurant. You decide to hit the outdoor bar and enjoy the last of the daylight. 

You slide into a barstool. The warmth of the sun and the refreshing sea-side breeze, along with a couple cocktails, quickly put you into a relaxed headspace. You’d been looking forward to this for so long and it’s definitely all you’d imagined it would be. 

The resort is pretty full, but not to the point where it gets on your nerves. The bar is occupied by a group of girls who look a little younger than you and some married couples.

You’re just finishing your second drink when something catches your attention - a loud, boisterous laugh coming from the other end of the bar. You lean forward to see a group of guys you hadn’t noticed before. The laugh comes from a man with chocolatey, smooth skin. He’s sitting with a gigantic blond man who is currently looking down at the bartop and shaking his head, a half smile on his face. The last man, though, is what makes you do a double take. 

He’s got dark, fluffy hair. Though his stubble tries to hide it, you notice his sharp jawline. His shoulders are broad and his biceps stretch the sleeve of his t-shirt. He’s smiling, pearly white teeth on display. You find that you’re still watching him as he brings a bottle of beer to his lips and takes a swig. 

You’re only snapped out of your trance when he looks in your direction. You quickly divert your eyes, but you aren’t quick enough. He catches your gaze for the briefest of seconds. You might be imagining things, but you swear you see the corner of his mouth curl up into a smile before he looks back to his friends - still laughing and yelling about something.

The sun has finally set and you decide on having one more of the fun, tropical drinks before heading up to your room. 

You prepare to flag down the bartender, surprised when you find him already stopping in front of you, one of the cocktails you’d been drinking in hand. 

“Courtesy of the gentleman at the other end of the bar.”

You quickly thank the bartender and look back to the other end of the bar where the group of guys had been sitting. They’re the only men sitting at that end of the bar.

The brunette is already looking at you. He gives you a million dollar smile and shoots you a wink before he turns, following his friends back into the hotel.

You sit in shock for a solid minute, replaying the wink over and over in your mind. Sure you’ve got a solid buzz and you haven’t been laid in a long time, but even if that wasn’t the case, you’re sure it would’ve been just as sexy. You’re only slightly ashamed of the small amount of wetness you feel in your panties.

You down the free drink and head back into the hotel. On your way to the elevator, you notice the man that’s been occupying your thoughts for the last 30 or so minutes standing at the reception desk. His hair is wet and his clothes are soaking through. 

You quickly make your way to the elevator and repeatedly press the up arrow. You’re not sure where the sudden embarrassment is coming from, but your cheeks are red and you don’t want him to see you right now. 

Unfortunately for you, you hear footsteps behind you and turn to find the same piercing blue eyes you had met across the bar staring back at you. 

“Friends stole all the towels out of my room,” he tells you, holding up a stack of fresh ones.

Well that explains why he was at the reception desk, also why he’s soaking wet. 

“Oh,” you manage a small chuckle as you look down at your feet. 

You can’t help but feel embarrassed when he’s looking at you so intently, like you’re the only thing on his mind right now. It doesn’t help that he’s one of the most handsome men you’ve ever seen and he’s talking to you of all people. 

You force yourself to meet his eyes again, “Thank you, um, for the drink earlier,” you manage in a somewhat steady voice. 

 “Course, doll,” another smile. 

The elevator doors finally open and he extends his arm, “After you.”

He follows you into the elevator and presses the number five. 

“What floor are you on?” he turns, waiting for your response.

“Same as you, apparently,” you smile up at him. 

You weren’t close enough to tell before, but he’s tall. At least six feet. 

“I’m Bucky, by the way. Sorry ‘bout leaving before I could introduce myself earlier, but my friends were being a pain in the ass - pardon my language.”

You tell him your own name and he holds out his hand. You put your hand in his and expect him to shake it, but what he does next surprises you.

He gently raises your hand to his mouth and presses a soft kiss to your knuckles.

“Pleasure to meet you,” he rolls your name off his tongue, still holding your hand.

You try your best not to make it obvious that you’re swooning over this man. Heat returns to your core at the feeling of his rough hand engulfing yours. 

The elevator bell dings, letting you know you’ve reached your floor. Bucky carefully drops your hand as the doors open. The two of you step out of the elevator and he stops.

“I’ll be seeing you around,” he says, holding eye contact with you.

“I hope so,” your buzz encourages you. 

You smile at each other and when he turns to head to his room, you do the same. 

“Goodnight, doll,” he shouts over his shoulder before disappearing into his room.

You can’t keep the smile off of your face the rest of the night. You’re in fucking Hawaii. A man straight out of your fantasies had bought you a drink, and he plans on seeing you around. You know it’s too soon to be thinking this, but maybe you’ll find a more unconventional way to relieve stress this week. 

After you wake up and get dressed for the day, you head down to get breakfast from the buffet. You load your plate and find a table. You’re in the middle of chewing a bite of waffle when you see Brock. Him and a woman, you assume it’s Marissa, are grabbing plates and getting into the breakfast line. 

Brock doesn’t notice you until after him and the woman have gotten their own food. You watch him as he scans the room for a table, his eyes eventually landing on you. 

He calls out your name and leans down to tell the woman something. 

“So glad you’re here! Are these seats taken?” he asks, not waiting for a response as he sits down, leaving the woman to follow. 

“Go ahead,” you say. You’re somewhat glad to have some company, even if it’s a little awkward.

“This is my fiancée, Marissa.”

“So nice to meet you,” she offers her hand and you shake it. 

Breakfast is filled with awkward conversation. You and Brock catch up a little bit, telling each other what you’re up to these days. After a few minutes, Brock pulls out his phone and doesn’t put it away for the rest of the meal. You talk to Marissa about the wedding planning and do your best to seem interested as she talks about flower arrangements for ten minutes. 

Eventually, conversation lulls and you take the opportunity to get up. 

“So nice catching up with you, Brock. And nice to meet you Marissa!” you say, heading to your room.

You decide on heading to the pool today and change into your bikini. It’s a black set that shows off your body without being too skimpy. You throw some clothes over it and grab your book before stepping out of your room. 

Before you reach the elevator, you hear your name being called. You turn and see Bucky standing by his door.

“Where are you headed to?” 

“I’m gonna go lay by the pool for a bit, wanna join me?” you answer, not sure where your courage is coming from.

Bucky grins as he responds, “Nothing else I’d rather do.”

You feel your face heat up.

“Lemme put some trunks on and I’ll meet you down there?”

“Sounds great, Bucky,” you nod at him before slipping into the elevator.

Once at the pool, you grab two towels. By some miracle, you manage to find two empty lounge chairs together. You set your things down and lay the towels over the chairs. You strip out of your clothes, leaving you clad in only the bikini, and apply sunscreen before laying down. You put your earbuds in and close your eyes and bask in the sun. 

Maybe it's the sunshine, maybe it’s the fresh ocean air, or maybe it’s something else entirely, but you’re feeling the happiest you’ve been in a long time. You notice that instead of your usual RBF, you've been smiling almost constantly since your arrival.

When you open your eyes, you see Bucky standing a few feet away from you, steel blue eyes raking up and down your body. 

“Oh, Bucky,” you pause your music, blush returning to your cheeks, “how long have you been standing there?”

“Shit,” he says your name, realizing he’d been caught staring, “I swear I just got here like ten seconds ago. I’m so sorry. Feel free to revoke my invitation because I was being a creep,” he grimaces, expecting you to be mad at him.

The way he looked at you was different than the way most men would look at you in a bikini, though. It wasn’t gross or pervy. It looked like he was genuinely just appreciating your body, rather than plotting how to get you into his bed. And he didn't make any disgusting comments or cat call you like other guys have in the past. Besides, you'd be lying if you said you didn’t get a boost of confidence from the way he looked at you.  

“Hmm,” you put your finger on your chin, pretending to mull it over, “I’ll let you sit down, but only if you buy me another drink first.”

That familiar grin spreads across his face again. 

“You got yourself a deal. You want another one of those gross cocktails you were drinking last night?”

“Um, excuse you, Mr. I’m too manly to drink cocktails, but I’ll have you know those were delicious.”

He chuckles and promises to be back shortly before walking toward the bar. 

You play your music and wait for him to return. After a couple minutes, he returns holding a colorful, fruit filled cocktail and a beer bottle.

Bucky takes his seat next to you, beer bottle in hand. He lets out a sigh of relief as he lays back in his chair. 

“So, not to be rude, but is Bucky your real name?”

“My full name is James Buchanan Barnes, if you must know. All my friends and family call me Bucky.” 

You nod and take a sip of your drink. 

“Man, it’s hot,” Bucky takes a drink from his bottle before setting it down and reaching down to grab the bottom of his shirt. You find it’s your turn to stare as he pulls it over his head, exposing tan skin and rippling muscle. Bucky gives you a cocky smirk when he notices you staring with your drink frozen midair, on its way to your mouth. 

You quickly avert your eyes and feel the familiar dusting of pink return to your cheeks. 

“Like what you see, doll?”

You simply shake your head at his teasing and smile, flustered as can be.

“So what do you do for work, Bucky?”

“Well I was in the army until a couple years ago. Now I’m a mechanic, I got my own shop with my buddies.” 

You make a mental note to thank the army for mandating PT as you watch a drop of sweat roll down Bucky’s washboard abs.  

“Is that who you’re here with?”

“Yeah. Me and Steve have known each other since we were little, actually. We met Sam when we joined up and after we all got out we opened up shop together,” a reminiscent smile plays upon his lips. “Those two knuckleheads are basically family. We decided to take a trip to celebrate the shop’s one year anniversary.”

“Speaking of family, do you have any?”

“My, uh,” his brows furrow, “my dad died when I was little, but I have a mom and a sister who’s a little younger than me. About your age, probably.” 

His expression returns to normal in a split second, “Enough about me. Do you have family?”

“Yeah, but I moved away for college and never went back home.”

“Where’s home?”

“Ohio. I live in New York now.”

Bucky seems almost excited at this bit of information. 

“Is that so?” he raises an eyebrow. “I live in Brooklyn.”

“Me too,” you share a smile.

Needing a break from the sweltering sun, you stand and grab your drink. 

“I'm getting in the pool, care to join?”

Bucky wordlessly stands and follows you to the pool, smiling. You walk down the steps, drink in hand. Bucky, however, stops at the edge of the pool and watches you. 

“You coming in or what?”

“In a minute, doll.”

Surprisingly, the pool isn’t that crowded. It’s huge, so the people that are in the pool are able to spread out and stay out of each other’s way. 

It’s only once you’re standing in the pool, water up to your bikini top, that Bucky decides to enter. 

Via cannonball. 

You register what he’s about to do as he jumps in the air and wraps his hands around his knees and you yell at him, Barnes don’t you dare! but it’s too late. Next thing you know, you’re drenched. Your hair and face are soaked and there’s pool water in your drink.

Bucky emerges from under the water, smirk dancing across his lips. His expression falters for a second when he notices your angry expression, but you can’t keep the smile from your face when he shakes his hair out like a wet dog. 

“You ruined my drink.”

“I’ll buy you another,” he says, taking the drink out of your hands and setting it on the edge of the pool. 

He walks closer and closer to you until you’re just inches apart. He tentatively moves his hands under the water until they’re resting on your bare hips. His grip is soft, barely there. He’s giving you a chance to reject his touch, but all you do is gently move into his hands. 

His grip becomes more firm and his eyes light up with a glint of mischief. Before you know what hit you, you’re being lifted out of the water, Bucky’s muscles flexing as he raises you up. Before you have a chance to stop him - as if you’d stand any chance against his nearly super human physique - he launches you back into the water. 

When you emerge from the water, you see Bucky nearly doubled over laughing at the angry expression on your face. You really do try your best to be mad at him, but his shimmering smile and the crinkles in the corners of his eyes makes it hard. 

“What. The. Hell,” you make your way back to him and move to smack his chest. Bucky has quick reflexes, though, and you find that your hand is trapped between one of his own and his muscular pec. 

“That was revenge for the way you’ve been staring at me all morning when I’m unable to do anything about it.”

You try to ignore the butterflies in your stomach at his flirty words in an effort to keep up your mad facade.

“What if I drowned Bucky?” you deadpan.

“Wouldn’t let that happen,” he says matter-of-factly. 

“Well, you’re still a jerk.”

“A jerk who’s talking to the prettiest girl in this resort,” he counters with a shit-eating grin.

Bucky drops his hand and, instead of moving yours away, you wrap both your arms around the back of his neck. 

“Not for much longer if you pull another stunt like that, Barnes.”

“Sorry, doll,” the amused grin he’s still sporting makes you doubt his apology.

His hands return to your hips and he pulls you closer. He’s a fair bit taller than you and you have to tilt your head up to look at him. The sun is reflected in his ocean blue eyes and water drips down his face, getting caught in the scruff spanning his jaw. 

Bucky leans down and lifts one of his hands to gently grab your chin between two long fingers. He softly directs you toward his own face. You can’t stop your eyes from flicking down to his pink, pillowy lips. You close the rest of the distance on your own. 

Bucky is quick to kiss you back after your lips meet his. He caresses your lips with his own and he moves his hand to the back of your neck, pressing you against him harder. He swipes his tongue across your lips and you part them for him. You let out a small moan into his mouth and he gently takes your bottom lip between his teeth.

He pulls away, letting your lip free. You feel a throb in between your legs when he gives your neck a quick squeeze before letting his hand fall back to his own person. 

“Fuck, doll. Don’t make me throw you into the water again.” He waits until he thinks you’re not looking before reaching down to adjust his swim trunks.

“You started it,” you reply as you make your way to the steps and climb out of the pool. “I need another drink,” you make sure to sway your hips as you walk back toward the bar, not needing to look back to know he’s watching. 

You lean against the bar and are waiting to be helped when you suddenly feel a hand on your hip. You turn around and expect to see Bucky, only to be met with the sight of a man you’ve never seen before.

“Can I help you?” you remove the man’s hand from you.

“Nice bikini, baby. Lemme buy you a drink,” the slur in his words and his unsteady stance letting you know that he’s certainly not sober.

“No, thanks,” you turn back to the bar, making it clear you’re not interested. 

The man either doesn’t get the hint or decides to keep trying anyway, because you feel both his hands land on your hips this time. He steps closer to you, his chest pressed up against your back.

Just as you’re preparing to throw an elbow into the man’s ribs, you feel his hands being ripped off of you. You turn around to see the man falling to the ground, Bucky standing over him. 

“Get up,” Bucky demands, looking down.

The man, surprisingly, manages to get back on his feet and gives Bucky a death glare. Before he has a chance to give Bucky a piece of his mind, as you’re sure he was about to, Bucky grabs him by the collar of his shirt and leans into the man’s ear. He says something too quiet for you to hear and emphasizes it by using his grip on the man’s shirt to shake him. A few people around you are starting to stare.

The man’s face goes slack and he nods in response to whatever Bucky had said. Bucky shoves the man away and he nearly falls to the ground again. Bucky stares him down as he turns and walks away. Once he’s sure the man isn’t coming back, he returns his attention to you. Thankfully, everyone’s attention seems to be back to whatever they were doing before the commotion.

“You okay, doll? I’m sorry about that.”

“It’s not your fault, Bucky,” you give him a half smile to let him know you’re okay, just sick of men thinking they have a right to touch you. “I’m okay.”

“You still want another drink? Told you I’d buy it,” he goes to flag down the bartender. 

You gently rest your hand on his bicep and he looks at you “Thank you, Buck,” you hope your genuine expression conveys that you’re not just thanking him for the drink.

He gives you a curt nod, “Don’t mention it. Just trying to be a gentleman.”

A few minutes later, armed with another round of drinks, you and Bucky are making your way back to the lounge chairs.

“So where are your friends today?” you inquire.

“Finally got those punks outta my hair for a little while. They went to hike up some mountain. Or maybe it was a volcano, I really don’t know.”

“You didn’t want to go with them?”

“I-uh,” he rubs a hand across the back of his neck, “let’s just say heights aren’t really my thing,” an adorable redness spreads across his face.

You nod, deciding to spare him any further embarrassment from teasing. The two of you sit down on the sides of your chairs, facing each other. 

“So why are you here?”

You figured the question would arise eventually, but you had been dreading telling him the reason. It just sounds embarrassing to admit that you’re attending your ex’s wedding. 

“I’m actually here for a wedding.”

“Oh yeah? Who’s getting married? Not you, I hope,” Bucky chuckles at his own joke but stops when you don’t so much as crack a smile. His face drops and he stares at you for a second before you notice his expression.

“No. God- no. I’m not engaged, Bucky. Very much single. It’s my ex’s wedding.”

His eyebrows shoot up, “Oh, wow,” you can tell he’s unsure how to respond.

“I’ve hardly talked to him since the breakup a few years ago. We’re on good terms, though. Actually ate breakfast with him and his fiancee this morning.”

“Well that’s good, I guess. That you’re on good terms, I mean. Why did you choose to come? Sorry if I’m being nosy, you dont have to answer.” “No, it’s fine. It’s a little weird, I get it. For the most part, it was a good excuse to take a vacation and hopefully see some old friends. It’s not like I still have feelings for Brock or anything, so I really couldn’t care less that he’s getting married. His fiancee seems nice enough. And things went okay this morning, so I’m hopeful that things won’t be too awkward at the wedding. Plus there’ll be an open bar at the reception,” you crack a smile.

Bucky listens and nods along. “Well I hope everything goes okay. I’m certainly not complaining that you’re here,” he gives you a soft smile.

Sunbathing next to Bucky and sharing laughter-filled conversation leaves you with such a serene feeling that you physically feel lighter and your mind feels clearer. You decide in that moment that this vacation was definitely worth it, you can feel your mental health improving by the hour.

At one point, you doze off and are woken to Bucky’s hand gently shaking your shoulder. You open your eyes and see him leaning over you, radiant smile on his face. 

“Probably shouldn’t stay out here too long or you’ll burn to a crisp.”

You sit up and nod, “Good point.”

You and Bucky get dressed and gather your things before depositing your towels in the proper bin and heading inside the hotel. Once you and Bucky reach your floor, you stand and shuffle your feet, unsure of what to do next. Bucky sets a hand on your arm and you look up at him. 

“My friends and I are going out to dinner tonight and, I’m sorry if this seems weird, but would you want to come with us? You don’t have to say yes, just thought I’d throw it out there,” he has a nervous look on his face and he chews on his lip while he waits for an answer.

You couldn’t be more thrilled at the fact that he still wants to spend more time with you, even though you’d been together a large chunk of the day already. You want to say yes, both because you have no other plans and because you’d love to spend more time with the man in front of you, but you don’t want to seem overly eager. 

“Yeah, I’d like that. Only if you’re sure your friends won’t mind, that is.”

Bucky looks almost relieved and gives you a boyish grin. “Nah, Steve and Sam will be fine. I’m sure you guys will get along great.”

“Okay, Buck, looking forward to it.”

“Can’t wait, doll. I’ll meet you here at seven.”

Bucky seems to hesitate for a moment, but then leans down and places a soft kiss on your lips, which you happily return. He pulls back and heads off to his room.

“See you tonight, sweetheart.”

You decide you have a bit of time before you need to start getting ready for dinner, so you grab your book and sit out on the balcony. You find that you have a hard time focusing on the words in front of you, though. The ocean waves and palm trees blowing in the breeze paired with the distant sounds of laughter and music coming from below makes for a pleasant distraction. Before you know it, it’s 6:45 and you scramble to get back inside and start getting dressed. 

It isn’t until you’re searching through your clothes that you realize you don’t know where you’re going for dinner or how to dress. You only packed three dresses, a sundress, the dress you’re wearing to the wedding, and the one you decide on for tonight.

The black dress comes down to your knees with a slit up the thigh. It’s tight and shows off your curves. The back is open, with straps crossing in the center of your shoulder blades. The cut in the front is low enough that it shows off your cleavage while maintaining a classy enough appearance. 

You decide to dress it up with heels - also black. They’re only a couple inches tall, so you can still walk in them somewhat comfortably. You’re thankful that you packed a decent selection of jewelry and throw on some silver earrings and a necklace.

You take a quick look at yourself in the mirror and can’t help but smile - damn you look good. You grab your clutch and open your door. You nearly walk into Bucky as you step into the hallway. 

Bucky is wearing tight grey dress pants with a snug-fitting short sleeve black button up. The first few buttons of his shirt are undone, giving you a peek of the toned chest hiding beneath. He’s paired the outfit with a black belt and matching shoes. He speaks before you have a chance to compliment him.

“Doll,” he looks you up and down, eyes wide, “wow. You look gorgeous.”

You feel yourself flush as you thank him. 

“You look really good too, Buck. Where’s Steve and Sam?”

“I told them to wait downstairs for us. Wanted to prepare you for them. They can be a bit,” he pauses, searching for the right word, “much, sometimes. I told them to be on their best behavior tonight. They just have a way of embarrassing people, Sam especially. I’m sure they’ll be teasing me nonstop, so just ignore anything they say.”

You chuckle lightly, “Don’t worry, I’m sure they’ll be fine.”

You and Bucky step into the elevator and take turns sneaking glaces at each other. Just before you reach the ground floor, Bucky leans over you, effectively trapping you between him and the elevator wall. Even in your heels, he has to lean down to be eye level with you. “I mean it, doll, you look stunning,” his eyes search yours, “Can I kiss you?”

You respond by closing the distance between the two of you. He reaches up and places a hand on the back of your head, holding you to him. The feel of his soft lips on yours makes you forget where you are. All too soon, the elevator door is opening and before you and Bucky have a chance to break away from each other, you hear a whistle.

“Damn, Barnes! Moving quick!” 

Bucky quickly steps away from you but stays in front of you, shielding you while you take a second to collect yourself. 

“Shut it, Sam,” Bucky says sternly. You don’t miss the red that creeps up the back of his neck. Nor do you miss how his tight pants do wonders for his ass.

After a second you step out from behind Bucky and extend a hand to the man, deciding to play it off.

“So you must be Sam,” you introduce yourself as he shakes your hand.

“Nice to meet you,” Steve responds when you shake his hand.

Steve and Sam lead the way out of the resort and you trail behind with Bucky. 

“We heard about this place some locals recommended that’s supposed to be really good. We’re gonna take a taxi there. That okay with you?”

“Sounds great,” you smile up at him.

The four of you wait in front of the resort for the taxi. 

“So,” Steve says your name, “you really spent all day with Bucky and he hasn’t made a fool of himself yet?”

“Whoa whoa whoa, I never said that. He’s lucky I’m even here right not after he threw me into the pool earlier. Although he did almost get into a fist fight defending me, so I guess it cancels out.”

Sam gives Bucky a grin, “Attaboy.”

“When me and Buck were younger, I used to get myself into all kinds of trouble and Bucky would have to end up kicking some dude’s ass for me almost daily,” Steve reminisces.

Bucky huffs and nods his head, “Punk dragged me into all kinds of trouble. Believe it or not, he wasn’t always this big. Needed to help him out or he woulda ended up bleeding out in an alley somewhere in Brooklyn.”

Steve’s cheeks heat up, but you have trouble picturing the man in front of you as anything other than he is now - huge and intimidating. 

After a couple minutes of getting to know Steve and Sam a little bit, the taxi arrives. It’s a five seater car, Steve sits in the front with the driver and you, Bucky, and Sam climb into the back. Bucky sits in between you and Sam. The car is plenty roomy enough, but Bucky makes sure to sit close enough that his thigh is pressed up against yours. The drive is short and Steve pays the driver when you arrive. Everyone gets out of the car. Bucky offers you his elbow and you link your arm in his. He leads the four of you into the building.

“Hi, we have a reservation for Barnes.”

The hostess leads you out back to the outdoor seating and your jaw drops. The palm tree surrounded patio is right on the beach and you have a perfect view of the sun setting on the water. Fairy lights and tiki torches give the place a soft glow. A live band plays soft Hawaiian music on a stage. 

Once you reach your table, the hostess sets down menus and silverware, before heading back inside. Bucky unlinks his arm from yours and he pulls out a chair for you. Before you sit, you turn to him.

“Bucky, this place is beautiful.”

“Glad you like it, darling.”

You sit and Bucky takes the seat next to you. By the time you snap out of your awestruck trance, Sam and Steve are both holding menus and arguing about something. You go to pick up a menu and notice Bucky’s eyes trained on you. He gives you a smile before looking down at his own menu. 

The waitress comes to take drink orders and the three men all order whiskey. You decide to get something other than a fruity cocktail.

“I’ll have the same,” you say when the server looks to you. 

You notice the way all three of their eyebrows jump at your choice. The waitress leaves and Bucky gently sets a hand just above your knee. He turns to look at you, as if asking for permission and you give him a reassuring smile. Conversation flows and when the waitress returns with the drinks, Sam and Steve immediately take a sip of theirs. Bucky’s eyes fall on you as you raise the glass to your lips. You keep eye contact with him as you take a drink, holding a straight face. You see of flash of something dark flash in his eyes and he moves his hand higher up your thigh and gives it a firm squeeze. 

You continue to read the menu and decide on seafood - you have to, you’re in Hawaii - and so does everyone else at the table. It is the restaurant’s specialty, after all. By the time the waitress comes to take your order, the four of you are all getting along great.

“So you guys all work on cars, huh?” 

“And bikes,” Sam nods at you.

“Do you guys all have motorcycles?” you glance around the table.

“Yeah, we do,” Bucky confirms.

You can easily picture him leather-clad, thick thighs straddling a Harley and his hand resting on the throttle. The thought makes you clench your thighs together and, based on the way Bucky’s thumb begins to rub circles into your thigh and he smirks at you, you assume he notices. 

“So what do you have planned for the rest of the week?” Steve questions you, oblivious to Bucky’s hand on you underneath the table.

“Well I’m going snorkeling tomorrow. I also want to hit the beach, maybe take a surf lesson. Horseback riding and hiking sounds fun too, though. What all have you guys done?”

“Well,” Sam starts, “we just got in yesterday, so we haven’t really done much yet.”

“Oh, so you guys got here the same day I did, then. When are you guys leaving?”

“Saturday, how about you?” Bucky answers you. 

“Sunday morning.”

“I’m sure you’ll be sick of Bucky by then,” Sam chortles.

Thinking about spending the rest of the week with Bucky puts a smile on your face and you hope he wants to spend more time with you, too. Eventually, the food comes and you all dig in. It’s so delicious that you’re not even mad about how expensive it was. Bucky lets out a groan of delight as he takes his first bite. 

“This is so good, doll. You want to try?” 

You nod and he raises his fork to your lips. He feeds you a bite of his food and you agree, it is delicious. You pull your attention away from Bucky just in time to see Sam whispering something into Steve’s ear, to which Steve chortles and nods.

“What are you guys talking about?” Bucky returns his attention to his friends.

“Nothing, man,” Steve dismisses him.

Bucky shoots them a warning look but drops it. 

The rest of the meal is filled with stories from their time in the army and Steve informs you that Bucky was a sergeant. You’re thankful that they don’t pressure you with too many questions about your boring life back in the city. The conversation flows easy and after a couple more rounds of drinks, the four of you are laughing so hard that you’re drawing attention from other tables. When everyone finishes eating, you excuse yourself to the bathroom and find your waitress. You give her your credit card, insisting that she charges the bill to your card.

You’d been having a great time with Bucky and his friends so far and you wanted to thank them for inviting you to have dinner with them. They had been so welcoming to you and have made your trip less lonely, even if only for one night. You return to the table.

When the waitress comes back to your table, she returns your credit card to you and the three men share a confused look.

Bucky cocks his head at you, “Did you pay for yourself already, doll? I was going to.”

“She actually covered the whole table,” the server informs them before leaving.

“Wait, what? You paid for us all?” Steve asks in disbelief.

Sam looks to you, waiting for an answer. Bucky just looks at you, brows furrowed. 

“Yeah. I just wanted to thank you guys for being so inviting. I enjoyed hanging out with you all tonight,” you look down at the table, feeling almost as if you’d done something wrong. 

Sam says your name, “That was really unnecessary, but thank you. We enjoyed your company. We get sick of each other, it was nice to have you join us. I really appreciate it.”

“Yeah,” Steve concurs, “I’m glad you could come. You really didn’t have to do that, but thank you, sincerely.”

“It’s not a big deal, guys. It was no problem.”

You turn to look at Bucky. He’s still in the same position - eyes trained on you and brows furrowed. You worry you’ve done something wrong and gently reach between the two of you and take his hand in yours. He gives your hand a reassuring squeeze and finally speaks. 

“Thank you,” you can tell there’s more he wants to say, though. Your group stands and heads to the front to wait for another taxi. After you step out the front doors, Bucky softly grabs your arm, holding you back. Steve and Sam continue walking. 

“Thank you for paying, I really appreciate the gesture. But I invited you tonight because I enjoy spending time with you and I wanted you to meet my friends. You shouldn’t have had to pay for your own dinner tonight, let alone everyone else’s. I do appreciate it, though, and I know Steve and Sam did too,” he gives you a sincere look and you sheepishly look down at the ground. He lifts his hand to cup your face and tilts it up to him, forcing you to make eye contact. “But all that being said, don’t you dare try and pull that again,” he says in a more authoritative tone.

You feel a wetness forming in your panties at the soft yet demanding tone he uses. You’re too shocked at the sudden dominance that you can’t bring yourself to do anything but nod up at him. 

“Good girl,” he praises in a low voice.

“You guys coming or what?” you hear Sam’s voice call.

You hadn’t even realized that taxi had arrived. Bucky leans down and presses a kiss to your lips before leading you to the car with a hand on the small of your back. Bucky sits inbetween you and Sam again and rests a hand on your thigh, dangerously close to slipping underneath the hem of your dress that had ridden halfway up your thighs. All you can focus on the whole car ride back to the resort is the feel of Bucky’s calloused hands on your leg and the pulsing at the apex of your thighs.

After what feels like hours, the cars pulls to a stop in front of the resort and you step out of car, followed by Bucky, who places his hand back on you immediately after he gets out. Steve and Sam make conversation, Bucky occasionally making a noncommittal grunt in response. After the elevator brings all of you to the fifth floor, Steve and Sam say goodnight and thank you again for dinner. You don’t miss the way Bucky’s hand tightens around your hip when they mention you paying for dinner. You say goodnight to them and they look at Bucky, probably expecting him to say goodnight and follow them back to their rooms. 

You’re not quite sure what you expect Bucky to do, but all you know is that the tension is thicker than Bucky’s biceps that are currently straining against his shirt sleeves.

“I’ll catch up with you guys in a little bit,” he tells his friends without taking his eyes off you.

“Okayyy,” Steve drags out the word as him and Sam turn and walk away, muttering and laughing to themselves.

Once you and Bucky are alone in the hall, he gently backs you up against the wall. He leaves one hand on your hips and tangles the other in your hair. He pulls you into a kiss that you fervently reciprocate. You’re sure that your panties are soaked at this point. You clench your thighs together, desperate for some friction. Bucky spreads your legs with his knee and slots his thigh against your center, forcing your dress to rise up. You moan into his mouth at the relief and buck your hips into him, your drenched underwear are dragging across his pants and you’re sure they’ll leave a dark spot from your arousal. 

Bucky pulls away from the kiss, but pushes his thigh harder against you. He leans down to whisper in your ear. “Dirty fuckin’ girl,” his voice is filled with lust, “Rutting up against my thigh in the middle of the hallway, skirt up so anyone can see how soaked your panties are for me.”

You whimper into Bucky’s ear. It turns you on to hear such filthy things coming from his usually polite mouth.

“Please, Bucky,” you beg, desparate for release.

“Please what, babydoll? Tell me what you need,” he demands.

He presses his bulge into your stomach and you can’t string together a sentence.

“I know, honey. You just wanna come, huh?” he looks down at you with a pitying expression and you nod your head so hard you get dizzy, too fuzzy-headed to care how desperate you look. He chuckles at you, “Say it. Tell me you need me to take care of you.”

“Please, Bucky! Make me come, take care of me. Just do something, please!” you sound absolutely wrecked and the groan Bucky lets out while he rocks his hips into you lets you know he gets off on it. 

“Fuck. Unlock your door, princess,” he tells you, pulling away and waiting by your door.

You’re surprised at how quickly you manage to dig you key card out of your purse and open the door in your aroused state. As soon as the door is open, Bucky grabs you and spins you around to face him.

“Jump,” he orders.

You drop throw your purse onto the table and wrap your arms around Bucky’s neck before jumping. He catches you by the backs of your thighs and effortlessly carries you to the bed, peppering kisses along your face and neck the whole way.

He throws you onto the bed and pulls off your shoes, placing a kiss to each of your shins. He then flips you onto your stomach and unties your dress. The way he manhandles you so easily sends a fresh gush of arousal to your core. He helps you shimmy out of your dress as he kicks off his shoes. You’re left in only your panties and he takes in the sight of your practically naked body and groans. He uses one hand to undo his belt and uses the other to reach down and palm your breast. 

“Goddamn, babydoll. No bra?” 

You don’t have the mental capacity to explain that you wouldn’t have been able to wear one with the open back dress, settling instead for reaching up and pulling him down by his collar until he’s straddling your hips. He leans back and unbuttons his shirt, exposing his broad chest and defined abs one button at a time, throwing it to the floor when he’s done. He has a dark trail of hair leading down into his dress pants where you can see the large outline of his hardened cock. He leans down atop of you, veiny forearms resting on either side of your head. 

He snakes a hand down between the two of you and dips his fingers in the waistband. “Can I take these off, babydoll?”

You nod and reach to his neck, trying to pull him down for a kiss. Much to your dismay, he doesn’t budge. 

“Need words, honey.”

“Yes Bucky, please.”

“Good girl,” he rewards you by leaning down and pressing his lips to yours.

His hand makes its way beneath your panties and he runs a finger through your abundant wetness, dragging it up to your clit. He uses your slick to rub circles into the sensitive bud. He pulls away from the kiss and you try to chase his mouth. He stops you by holding your head to the mattress with a hand on your jaw. He squeezes your cheeks until your mouth opens. He looks down at you and spits directly into your mouth.

“Swallow for me, baby.”

You follow his order without a second thought. Once you swallow, he brings his hand down to your neck. He rewards you by bringing a finger to your entrance and slowly pushing into your tight hole. 

“Fuck, doll. I wanna be in this perfect little pussy. Do you want that? Want me to fill you up with my big cock? Wanna feel me deep inside you?”

“Yes, Bucky! Fu- I want it so-fuck so bad.”

He quickly adds a second finger and begins pumping them inside you at a brutal pace. His hand on your throat tightens ever so slightly and he watches your face to gauge your reaction. When your eyes roll back into your head and your pussy clamps down on his fingers, he grins and tightens his grip a little more.

The lack of blood flow to your head makes you feel fuzzy in the best way. You feel yourself getting close to your orgasm. Bucky keeps his pace as he fucks you on his fingers and keeps a careful eye on you, watching for the telltale signals of your climax. When he sees you squeeze your eyes shut and feels your pussy clench, he pulls his hand out altogether. 

You look up at Bucky and loosens his grip on your neck, but keeps his hand resting there. You buck your hips up, your orgasm fading away rapidly. Bucky uses one hand to pin your hips to the bed.

“Bucky, no,” you whine, “I was so close.”

“I know, doll,” he gives you a mischievous smirk. “You were a bad girl earlier when you paid for dinner. You’re supposed to let me treat you. Let me take care of you. You wouldn’t let me take care of you then, so I’m not sure I should take care of you now.”

“Bucky please,” you beg, “Won’t do it again, promise. Just-nngh just take care of me please. Need you to make me come,” you hope your pleading is enough to convince him.

Bucky lets out a deep groan and smashes his lips against yours. He makes his way down your torso, stopping to pay special attention to your nipples. He ever so softly bites down on your nipple and you thread your fingers through his hair. He continues to trail kisses down your stomach. When he reaches your panties, he places wet kisses against the soaked fabric. You try to buck up into his mouth, but his hand is still pinning you down.

Finally, he reaches into the waistband of your panties and you raise your hips, allowing him to pull them down your legs and throw them on the floor with your dress. You get another glimpse of the rock-hard bulge in his dress pants and you know that can’t be comfortable for him, but his attention is all on you right now. He makes himself comfortable between your legs and uses his hands to spread your pussy apart, getting a good look at it.

“Fucking perfect. Prettiest damn pussy I’ve ever seen, baby.”

As soon as the words are out of his mouth, his lips are on you. He sucks your clit into his mouth and flicks at it with his tongue. You grab onto his hair with one hand and grab the sheets with the other. The screams you let out are almost pornographic. He alternates between licking your arousal up from where it’s seeping out of your hole and giving your sensitive clit attention. In an embarrassingly short amount of time, you feel yourself returning to the edge of the orgasm you’d just been denied. 

He laps at your core and uses both hands to hold your hips down onto the bed. When your heavy breathing and the movement of your hips give away your oncoming orgasm, he pulls away again. 

“NOO,” you practically scream, on the verge of tears. “Bucky,” you sob. 

“That one was for giving me a hard on at dinner when you downed that whiskey.”

Before you have a chance to complain anymore, he places one last kiss on your clit and stands from the bed. You watch as he undoes his pants and they pool at his ankles. You can see a wet spot on his boxers where he’d been leaking precum. He drops those too and you’re met with the sight of him. His cock bobs up against his stomach.

He’s thick and long, with a patch of dark curly hair at his base. The tip is pink and shiny with his arousal. Your mouth waters at the sight and you want nothing more than to lick it off, but he crawls back onto the bed before you can make any move to do so. He hovers over you and you can feel the weight of his cock resting on your lower stomach. 

“You want this, honey? Want to come all over my cock? Want me to fuck you so hard you can’t walk in the morning?” he ruts against your stomach, waiting for a response.

“Please, Bucky. ‘S all I want. Ah- fuck. Need it so bad. I need to come.”

“I got you, sweet girl,” he gives you a reassuring look as he grabs his base and guides himself to your drenched core.

He pushes his fat tip into you, watching your face for any signs of pain. You’re so wet and aroused that he almost slides right in. You try to push your hips down, desparate to feel him deeper. He’s quick to pin you down again. 

“Greedy girl.”

He eases himself into you at his own pace until his hips are flush against yours. You feel his pubic hair rubbing at your clit and begin to claw at his back, needing him to move.

“Fuck me, Bucky. Ah- god damn it,” you look up at him with pleading eyes, “Need you to move, baby.”

For the first time tonight, he listens to one of your demands. He slowly pulls all the way out, letting you feel every inch of his cock before he slams back in so hard it pushes you up the mattress. He braces himself with one arm on the bed and holds your hip with his other hand and sets a brutal pace. He thrusts deep and hard, tip pounding against your cervix with every punishing thrust. He moves the hand on your hip to rub at your clit.

“I’m not gonna last long baby. Fuck- be ah- be a good girl and come for me.”

You’re not far off and when he hits that spongy spot inside of you, you let out a scream. 

“Fuck, right there!” you pant.

He rubs at your clit and thrusts into your g-spot. You feel yourself hurdling toward your orgasm for the third time tonight. Except this time, when you clamp down around Bucky’s cock, he redoubles his efforts instead of stopping. You see stars when you reach your peak and you drag your nails down Bucky’s back. 

“Such a good girl for me, fuck. Where-ah where do you want me baby?”

“Inside, Bucky, please,” you want to know what it feels like to be full of his cum. “I’m on the pill.”

“Fuck, doll. So fucking good for me. My girl’s so good.”

You don’t miss the way he calls you his girl. And you certainly don’t mind it.

Bucky’s thrusts become shallow and his pace falters. He slams into you one last time and buries himself as deep as he can before shooting hot ropes of his seed into you. Once he empties his balls into you, he leans down, bracing himself on his forearms so as not to crush you. He slots his lips against yours and the two of you share breaths as you come down from your highs.

Once the two of you have caught your breath, he slowly pulls out of you. He places a kiss on your forehead and walks to the bathroom. You eye the dimples in his buttcheeks as he walks away. He returns shortly with a wet cloth and kneels between your thighs. He gingerly cleans his mess, aware of how sensitive you are. 

When he finishes, he throws the cloth onto the floor and climbs up the bed to join you. You climb under the sheets and fold them over on the other side, offering Bucky the space. He happily lays down next to you and pulls you into his chest.

“You’re beautiful, doll. I hope you enjoyed that as much as I did.”

“It was so good, Buck,” you manage to respond in your exhausted state. 

“I’m sure you’d enjoy it more if I didn’t have to punish you, too,” you can’t see his face, but you know he has a cocky smirk on his face.

“You’ll have to show me, then.”

“Oh, believe me, sweet girl, I plan to.”

You fall asleep against Bucky’s strong chest, his hand scratching soothingly at your back.

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[buckrecs]

ur account is my absolute go to!!! any chance u could rec biker!bucky fics 🥺🥺🥺

Biker!Bucky

masterlist | req masterlist

ONESHOT

Wanted by @jadedvibes

You consider ending things with Bucky after seeing a girl come on to him, but it's not that easy, and you get a hard reminder about who he really wants in the clubhouse bathroom.

Best Friends? Nah. by @wicked-mind

Classic best friends don’t realize feelings for each other until someone points it out.

Business as Usual by @world-of-aus

Not My Babe by @avecra

After a nasty break up to a nearly two year relationship, you find yourself dragged to a bar by your best friend, though a familiar blue-eyed biker makes the best of your crappy situation.

rough around the edges by @wndalovebot

Let Me Love You Old School by @mysecretlittlelibrary

Bucky meets you at a diner and plans to sweep you completely off your feet.

The Bogeyman and Other Monstrosities by @pellucid-constellations

As the local biker club president, Bucky Barnes had a reputation for being tougher than nails and feared by many—he’d never be caught dead at a halloween street fair. Too bad his best girl always got what she wanted.

Waiting Game by @buckychrist

You knew being associated with one of the most notorious and dangerous biker gangs in the city was bad, let alone scandalously dating their kingpin in secret, but you never thought you’d have to face those consequences. Until now.

Home by @all1e23

Bucky runs into his ex at a winter carnival the MC is helping host, but she didn’t come alone.

Whatever It Takes by @sgtjbuccky

Bucky Barnes knows the way to drive you up the wall in frustration, fed up with it, you show him that you know how to play just the same.

deny me by @drewbarymore

In which you feel like Bucky’s ashamed of you.

Drunk, Dumped and Empty by @green-eyeddragonfanfiction

After a nasty breakup, you go out drinking. After an absolute creep hits on you, you’re saved from a concussion by a mysterious, kind man, who reveals himself to be Bucky Barnes. The bar you’re in is a bit suspect, but you never expected him to be head of a biker gang.

yayo by @sergeantxrogers

“I need you safe. I need you here, and I need you safe, and I need, God please, I need you to let me in, baby, just let me in and I promise I’ll make it all better,” his broken voice pleaded through the door.

Drabble by @fandoms-writings

Biker!Bucky x tattooed!reader

hot and cold by @bucksfucks

you & bucky had never gotten along, but when your ex-boyfriend ransom turns up at the same bar you’re at, bucky goes to every length to protect you.

How To Get Away With Murder by @empyreanwritings

Bucky was always good at helping you clean up your messes, which is why he doesn't bat an eye when you show up on his doorstep covered in your abusive boyfriend's blood.

Hush by @buckysknifecollection

Bucky finds a stray kitten but he doesn’t know anything about cats. A friendly librarian helps him out.

little favors by @onceuponastory

Since Bucky saved her from her shitty boss, Y/N hasn’t seen him again. For a while, she gets closer and closer to giving up hope. Until he comes back. And this time, he’s asking for her help.

SERIES

Swallow by @all1e23

Since he was fifteen years old, Bucky Barnes has only been sure of two things; the club should be the most essential thing in his life, and he’d burn it all down for you.

Delicate Edges by @wkemeup

Your family’s beloved flower shop was not the only thing you inherited when your parents passed. Trapped under a mountain of debt to the Hydra club, you bear the cost of your father’s desperate bargain. It’s only in moments when the charming Bucky Barnes walks into your shop that you can forget the cruelty of the biker clubs of this town. But a war is brewing. The border is crumbling. You're trapped in the middle. And Bucky will stop at nothing to keep you safe.

For The Best by @metalbuckaroo

Bucky is tired of waiting for you to realize what you're doing. He does the only thing he can think of to break the cycle.

White Horses by @whitewolfbumble

Kicked out of school and exiling yourself in a town time forgot, one little incident lands the sights of the locally infamous Avengers biker gang square on you. Wild horses run faster and there was no chance to turn back now.

Howlin’ For You by @invisibleanonymousmonsters

When Y/N gets an unreal deal on her first home, she wonders why her neighbor scared away all the other buyers. Despite being cautious, she wonders why the town has given Bucky Barnes a bad name.

Brotherhood & Bullets by @rookthorne

The 107th motorcycle club has been the protector of their collective hometown for many, many years - shouldering all the bloodshed and loss that came with it. Little did you know, you'd become the President's own twisted version of an angel on his shoulder; the tips of your angelic wings tinged red by your own demons.

Stars & Stripes, Studs & Spikes by @buckyismybicycle

The crew has always been tight, but you and Bucky are best of friends. When Bucky sees Brock's mark on you, he nearly loses it and wants to end Brock for good. But, there's something more important - keeping you safe.

call me baby by @cherryrogers

Returning to Brooklyn for the summer after a year of travelling from city to city, you hadn’t expected to find your best friend, Peggy Carter, hopelessly in love with a biker, and when she decided to introduce you to the rest of his club, you hadn’t expected to fall for one either — that was until you met one with pretty eyes and a habit of calling you baby.

Masterlist by @angrythingstarlight

Masterlist by @metalbuckaroo

#bucky barnes fic rec #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x f!reader #bucky barnes smut #winter soldier x reader #bucky barnes series #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes angst #biker!bucky #bucky barnes modern au #biker!bucky x reader #bff!bucky #best friend!bucky #bucky x florist!reader #neighbor!bucky

[anonymityisfunwriter]

get him back!

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader Summary: You established that he's a bad idea. You know that. You know there's a million and one reasons to stay away from him. And you will - probably. But first, you have to get him back.

bad idea right? | get him back! | love is embarrassing Anon's 1K Celebration

you watch him or maybe you're just glaring at him. you know that he knows he’s pissing you off. you also know you have no real claim to your ex boyfriend. you weren’t sure what the rules were for bed buddies.

you knew one thing for sure.

you were going to get bucky barnes back.

“you’re staring.”

your head jerks over to natasha. “what?”

she rolls her eyes and slides you a shot, “you’re staring.”

you toss back the shot with a wince as bucky grins down at the random girl he just started flirting with. it sounds like an even better idea now. you’re going to get him back. you’re just not sure how.

“i assume it’s not going well.”

you were never going to admit that to your biggest supporter, your best friend. who was also the biggest critic of your love life, or just the biggest critic of your relationship with bucky. “it’s fine.”

“i told you it was a bad idea. exes are exes for a reason.”

you really hate her 'i told you so' tone.

you already knew that. you knew that there was a logical reason he was an ex. there were actually a lot of reasons why he was an ex.

his habit of arguing with you about everything.

his temper.

his massive… ego.

did that stop you from ending up in his bed? no.

did your month long exes with benefits affair stop him from flirting with that girl across the bar when you were standing right there? also no.

he was just so much fun. and really sweet - at least most of the time. and it really is unfair how pretty he is. and when he said something wrong, he’d kiss you until you forgot your own name, let alone what he did to piss you off.

you’re torn between wanting him back in your bed or maybe setting his bed on fire.

but you’re going to get him back. one way or another.

tonight, alcohol making your head swim with bad ideas. you’ll start by making him jealous. two could play at that game. and you could play it so much better than he could.

you leave natasha without another word and you sidle up to the booth your friends occupied, slinging an arm over sam’s shoulder, “hey, sam?”

he quirks an eyebrow and huffs a laugh, “yeah?”

you stroke his arm up and down, “how would you feel about pissing bucky off?”

“sounds promising.”

your smirk grows into a wicked grin. “perfect.”

“two questions.” sam stops you in your tracks. “how drunk are you? and what are the chances that i get my teeth knocked in at the end of this?”

“not that drunk. and about 50/50,” you admit, reaching out to playfully stroke his cheek, “but we’ll stop before we do anything that’ll make him mess up your pretty face.”

sam’s hand catches yours, keeping it pressed against his cheek. he teasingly grins, “has anyone told you how big of a fucking flirt you are?”

“all the time.”

he kisses the back of your hand with a sly grin, “then, let’s do it.”

you lace your fingers with sam’s, pulling him to the dance floor. not close enough to bucky that it's obvious, but just enough that there's no way he'll miss you dancing with his beloved frenemy.

you wrap your arms around sam's neck, pulling him close enough that you can feel his whiskey breath dust your face. “call me crazy, but couldn’t you just talk to him?”

“we aren’t very good at that.”

just last week, you tried that. you poured your little heart out, but just as you were about to hit send, you heard natasha’s disapproving tone echoing through your head.

the last time, the fight that led to your breakup, you told him how he hurt you and he brushed you off. yet another reason he was an ex.

did he try to make up for it? yes. were you being stubborn? also yes.

“no shit.” sam grips your waist, lowering his hand just enough to teeter out of the friendly territory. “he’s looking… this is okay, right?”

“you’re perfect, sam.”

sam snorts at you, “flirt.”

“is he still looking?”

sam presses you closer to him for another moment. “he just looked away, but he looks pissed. i’m pretty sure he’s gonna to kick my ass.”

it’s childish. you won’t try to deny it. and as twisted as it sounds, you have no reservations about breaking his heart - so long as you’re the one to stitch it up.

you press yourself into sam a little more, “he’s going to love me and hate me at the same time.”

sam loosens his grip on you, quirking an eyebrow, “so you’ll play games with each other and just pretend that sleeping with each other for the past month means nothing?”

“that shithead told you?”

“oh please," sam scoffs. "you two were so obvious. even steve figured it out.”

“the asshole didn’t tell me that you all knew,” you grumble.

“did you tell him that wanda and natasha know?”

no, you didn’t mention that little tidbit of information to him either, but sam clearly knows that so you don't bother to respond to him.

“i didn’t think so.”

sam spins you around halfway, stopping when your back is pressed against his chest. he drapes an arm around you and whispers in your ear, “and i say this will all the love and respect in the world, but you’re literally doing all this to fuck with him. it’s pretty obvious.”

“maybe i just wanted an excuse to dance with you,” you tease.

“fuck off,” he laughs, turning you back to face him. “i’m serious, though, you two could solve 90 percent of your problems if you just talked to each other.”

“or maybe i can fix him.”

“how about you start with some honesty? see where that gets you.”

you shake your head, groaning at the advice. “i love you, sam.”

“love you too. enough to risk getting the beat down of a lifetime,” he points out. "by the way, he ditched the girl. he's sulking at the bar by himself now."

“i’ll talk to him," you promise. "only so he doesn’t kill you. the rest of your advice was bullshit.”

sam playfully rolls his eyes, “of course. i’d expect nothing less from the two of you.”

"thanks for the dance, sam."

"anytime."

and with that, you part ways. you head outside into the cold night. you don’t need to look to know that he’s storming after you.

“what the hell do you think you're doing?” he demands, immediately invading your personal space.

you angrily clutch the lapels of his jacket, pulling him in towards you, “getting you back.”

Bucky Barnes Masterlist AnonymityIsFun Masterlist

As always, let me know what you think! Reblogs and comments are always appreciated! 💛

Taglist: @marianita195 @meli18gonzalez @ludicbouquetfromearth @matchat3a @famousbreadcherryblossomsstuff @valoraxx @blue786sworld @buckyandgeraltsupremacy @geminigengar @ansaturn @ecolle @lexhalstead3 @ybflkmj @mediocre-daydreams @shanye1112 @thegirlnextdoorssister @toomanyfanficsbruh @moonlightreader649 @breathtaking-cynthia @mirikusashes@beans-and-toast @niyahcoca @katiechikin @elxvrr @antiheroxsblog @infamouslyclumsy @krissydclayton93 @buckysbarne @deadheadwbedhead @qualitygiantshoepsychic @whitexwolfxx310 @getosprettyboy @matchat3a @weallhaveadestiny @mostlymarvelgirl @honeydew3064

#anonymityisfunwriter #anonymityisfun #anon's 1k celebration #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #reader insert #x reader #marvel fanfiction #bucky x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky angst #bucky x female reader #james buchanan barnes #bucky #bucky fic #bucky fluff #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes au #bucky x you #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x fem!reader #bucky barnes x avenger!reader #get him back

[last-herondale]

Almost

Bucky Barnes x FemReader!

Angst, heartbreak, longing, unrequited love

Hello! It’s been a while, but here is my Bucky fic that I promised from my poll!

The night air was cool and crisp against your skin. The wind was blowing slightly, not enough to be uncomfortable, but enough to cause stray pieces of your hair to swirl into the night as you leaned on the balcony of the Avenger’s tower. You could hear the music from the party inside, its rhythmic beat softly booming from within. It was Steve’s birthday party and it was a lively event that you, Nat, Sam, Bucky, and surprisingly Tony, had spent weeks planning. The guardians had flown in for the occasion, as well as Carol and Thor, who had Loki in tow with him. The night started off simple enough with a nice dinner at a fancy restaurant. It was just Steve, Bucky, Nat, Sam, and yourself at dinner while Tony was busy finishing the party preparations with Bruce.

You had wondered if dinner would be awkward at all. It had been 10 months since Bucky and Nat had broken up, and it had been a strenuous ordeal for the whole team. Nat had broken it off with Bucky, for personal reasons she had told you in confidence. You knew they had had problems during their relationship, problems mostly stemming from their mutual inability to be there for each other emotionally. It was a tough reality to face, for both of them. You often felt like the bridge between the two of them, being the one that both parties were able to confide in. It was hard to be impartial to either side.

On one hand, Natasha was your best friend. She had been ever since you joined the team. She had been dating Bucky when you first joined the team, and your friendship only seemed to strengthen once they broke up. You loved Nat, and treasured her friendship more than anything in the world. You were very surprised when she told you that she started seeing Bruce Banner a few months ago. Even though Bruce seemed like the opposite of Bucky, in all accounts she seemed very happy with him. And you were happy that she was happy…

But on the other hand, there was Bucky. He had been devastated by the breakup. He had wanted nothing more than to drown away his sorrows in booze and fill his nights with endless distractions. You had been very surprised when he had called you one night, asking if you wanted to hang out with him and Steve. Nat had been out with Banner that night, and the tower felt lonelier than usual, so you agreed.

The three of you had spent the night drinking and playing darts. It had been a fun night of laughter and jokes. You were almost glad to see Bucky as he once was, happy and carefree, but as the night wore on, and Steve tapped out around 4 am, it was just the two of you left at the bar. The two of you just sat at the bar, sipping the last of your drinks when you asked him how he was doing.

His facade had slipped away, the smile he had forced all night was gone, and instead he put his head down and let out violent sobs of anguish. “I miss her, god, she was…everything.”

It broke your heart to see him so miserable. You never knew he was in such a poor state. It had been 7 months since they had broken up at that point, and as far as you or Nat knew, he hadn’t seemed like he was upset about it. Why he decided to be so open in front of you… you couldn’t understand. But you comforted him, as best as you could. You stayed with him all night, agreed to take a walk with him and let him vent to you until the sun came up. When he finally passed out on your couch at the avengers tower, he woke up hours later and left without a word.

You thought that was the end of it. That it was just one drunk night that had him so emotional, but then he called again. And again. And again. Hanging out with Bucky started to become a normal part of your routine. Half of the time it was always with Steve, the three of you hanging out. But then Bucky would want to hang out with just you. Mostly you both would talk, sometimes drink, sometimes watch a movie or even sing some karaoke once the liquor started to hit. It was…nice.

You had made sure it was okay with Nat, of course. Asking her if she was bothered by you hanging out with her ex, but Nat seemed undisturbed.

“It seems like he needs a friend, and I know I haven’t been around for you a lot lately either. I’m okay with this, really. Whatever it is— and whatever it becomes.”

Despite your many assurances that nothing was going to happen between you and Bucky, Nat just brushed it off and teased you further about it. She was in a really good place with Banner and she seemed genuinely thrilled with the idea of you and Bucky becoming an item.

The idea had crossed your mind a time or two. Mostly when you were very intoxicated and alone with Bucky. It was hard not to be drawn in by the beauty of him. You’ve caught yourself staring at his arms when he was throwing darts more times than you’d care to admit, and whenever he would throw his arm around you in a fit of laughter, you couldn’t help but feel your stomach flutter.

Getting to know him on a deeper level made the idea of not wanting him even harder to deny. He was still very much hung up on Nat, that was clear, but whenever he let himself be vulnerable and he talked about his past and the things that haunted him, you couldn’t help but feel connected to him in a way that you hadn’t felt with others. Everything about him seemed to be drawing you in. It was a maddening cycle trying to stop yourself from catching feelings, but it was one you fought for the longest time.

Until tonight. The party had been the biggest eye opener to you since you started being friends with Bucky. Dinner was not an awkward affair, much to your surprise. Nat and Bucky were cordial with each other at the dinner table, even sharing a few laughs as you sat between them.

“How have you been James?” Nat asked. Bucky gave her a small smile. “I’ve been alright. I heard about you and Banner, congrats by the way.” Banner had proposed to Nat a few weeks ago. To your surprise Bucky had taken it rather well.

“Thank you, we are very happy,” Nat beamed. She gave you a quick glance and smiled. “Have you seen anyone Buck?” You opened your mouth to protest to Nat, but Bucky just laughed.

“I have been talking to someone for a little while now.”

You felt your heart drop to your stomach. This was the first you had heard of this. You kept a steady grin on your face as he continued talking. You thought you saw Nat flash you a Quick Look, but it was so fast you could have thought you had imagined it.

“Well, that’s awesome. I’m happy for you Buck,” Natasha smiled.

“Yeah, we’ve only been on a few dates but so far it’s been going well.”

The rest of the dinner felt like a strange blur. You remember sitting there, you remember eating, and you remember getting into the car to head back to the tower where the surprise party was, but any other detail of the night faded away into nothing.

Why did it bother you so much? You had no right to lay claim to all of Bucky’s attention. The two of you were friends, and nothing more. You had set that boundary yourself, for yourself to stop yourself from getting hurt. But then again, you had never gotten as close to anyone as you had with Bucky. There had been people in the past, those you thought had the potential to hold your heart, but nothing ever worked out with them.

When the party returned to the tower, an uneasiness settled deep into your stomach as people began to arrive. You tried your best to distract yourself with trivial tasks such as handing out drinks, messing with decorations, or just following Sam around and letting him talk your ear off. But as the party grew, so did the uneasy feeling in your stomach.

Who was this girl? Would she be here tonight? Would you be able to handle it if she was?

As these thoughts were swirling around your head, you decided that maybe it was time to talk to Nat about your feelings. You searched around wildly for any sign of her or Banner but came up empty. You saw Bucky momentarily, he was talking with Steve and your eyes met for a single moment but you quickly looked away. You needed air.

So, that’s when you stepped out of the party and had been hiding ever since. You sent a text to Nat to meet you outside whenever she could. You stood there a bit, swirling the drink in your hand and enjoying the breeze on your flushed cheeks. You heard the sliding door open and you turned expecting to see Nat.

“I need to talk to— oh, hey,” you caught yourself and pitched your voice higher as Bucky closed the door behind him.

“Hey, doll,” He said, his usual playful tone was a bit strained, “Everything okay?”

“Yeah,” you replied quickly, a bit too quickly, “I, uh, just needed some air.”

You moved a bit from your spot as he came to stand beside you. The smell of his cologne hit your nose as he sidled up next to you on the balcony, the leather of his jacket brushing against your arm momentarily. Your chest felt like it was contracting, being so close to him. As if the proximity alone was enough to unravel your whole being.

“How are you enjoying the party?” You choke out, refusing to look him in the eye, focusing instead on the city skyline below.

“It’s fine,” he began cautiously. It seemed, “It would be better if you would talk to me though.”

Your back stiffened at his words. You said nothing and yet he continued. “You’ve hardly said a word since dinner and we both know that isn’t normal. You didn’t even laugh when Sam made fun of Banner’s bowtie in the car.”

“Yes I did,” you said weakly.

“If you’re gonna lie to me, can you at least look me in the eyes?”

It was the brokenness in Bucky’s voice that made you turn to face him finally. His eyes were searching yours, trying to read every detail from your face. You bit your lip to keep it from trembling.

“Please, just tell me what’s wrong,” he begged quietly.

You opened your mouth, wanting to answer him, wanting to take away his discomfort at this moment, but the aching of your heart prevented words from coming out.

A choked out noise came from your lips just as the sliding door opened.

“—and I told him, I said—- oh hey!” Scott Lang said in a slur of words, having some unfamiliar guy in tow behind him.

“This are my buddies! Barnes and—“

“Leave Lang. Now.” Bucky said with icy venom.

You didn’t have to look to know that Bucky’s cold tone was enough to do the job as the door slammed shut again.

You wished you could follow Scott out of the situation, but you couldn’t. You took a deep breath, summoned your courage, and downed your drink in one fell swoop.

You shut your eyes right and clenched your jaw a moment as the liquor burned down your throat.

“I’m in love with you.”

The silence that followed there after was deafening. You opened your eyes and looked at Bucky. His expression was soft, his eyes a bit wide with the information, but there wasn’t any hint of anger or disgust.

“I…” he began, “I don’t deserve that.”

His eyes finally looked away from you, as if it was his turn to be embarrassed. His turn to feel ashamed.

“Look, you’ve been everything to me lately. You’ve put up with me when other people wouldn’t— when other people haven’t. You’ve cared for me, truly cared… and it’s lit a fire in my soul again. A fire I thought would forever be extinguished when Nat—- when we broke up.”

His eyes flickered towards you for a moment here and there. You held a steady gaze out towards the balcony, letting his words sink in as you felt your heart shudder at each word.

“I owe you more than I could ever pay back, and that’s why I know— I know I don’t deserve you.”

Suddenly your felt his bare fingers under your chin, his hand gently tilting you gaze to him. Tears fell down silently and touched his hand.

“Listen to me, okay, please,” he begged, his voice catching slightly, “I love you. Okay? I love you, I do. But you deserve more than me. You deserve someone whole, someone who has all the love you give them in turn equally back to you, and then some. I want what’s best for you, and I know deep down that I am not that.”

You did everything in your power to not turn into a whimpering mess, you held his gaze, ignoring the tears. You took a ragged breath and moved your chin enough for him to drop his hand.

“Tell me about her.”

Bucky sighed and put his hands in his pocket.

“She’s nice. Has her own issues, but she’s more like me. Broken like me.”

You nodded, wiping at your face in vain. The tears kept coming, even if you didn’t feel sad. Even though you were pissed.

“I’m happy for you,” you said as happily as possible. You took a step towards the door but he moved in front of you, gently placing his hands on your shoulders.

“Wait, please.”

You didn’t fight him. You met his gaze in defiance and you swore you could have seen a smile creep on his lips.

“There she is,” he murmured.

You couldn’t help but smile a bit at him. Even though a million emotions were running through your mind at the moment, the idea staying mad with him never stuck for long. Even now.

“I need you to know how much I care about you. I need you to understand that. If you hate me for it afterward then I can live with it,” you opened your mouth to tell him you could never hate him but he kept going as if to purposefully stop you.

“I would still be in a very dark place if it wasn’t for you. I value your life significantly more than mine. I would die for you, I would kill for you. You are everything to me and more and I am so honored to be loved by you. I treasure you, I adore you, but I am no good for you. Please understand that. You deserve so much more than I have to offer. And I would hate myself if I broke your heart. And I would. I already have. And I hate myself.”

Suprisingling the tears stopped. You looked at Bucky and studied his face. He was sincere. He was broken, that you already knew. He had more ghosts than anyone else could ever imagine, and past that haunted him daily. But he was Bucky. And he was kind and he was gentle, and he was fierce and loyal.

And you loved him.

That feeling would not easily go away, no matter how much Bucky might wish for it to. But you decided then that you would hold onto that feeling for now. Even though he warned you, had told you he did not want anything further. It would be harsh. It would be devastating. It would be soul crushing.

But it would be yours.

“I think I need some time.”

That was all you said further. His hands dropped from your shoulders and you walked back into the fray of the party. You could feel his eyes on you as you walked through the lobby. People were dancing and drinking and laughing and having a blast. You walked past them all, not paying them any mind. Nat found you, tried to talk to you but you just brushed her off as you found the elevator.

You held yourself straight. Composed. Even when the door to the elevator closed and you were alone. Even when you walked down your corridor and found your way into your dark apartment. It wasn’t until you changed from your party clothes into your sleepwear, curled up in your bed, alone in the dark, that you began to cry.

#reader x marvel #marvel fanfic club #fan fic author #fic writing #james bucky barnes #marvel #bucky x reader #winter soldier #james bucky buchanan barnes #marvel bucky barnes #unrequited love #fem reader

[wlntrsldler]

marvel masterlist

bucky barnes:

series

DOPPELGÄNGER: Bucky has only been in love once and it was before he was put in ice and way before he became the Winter Soldier. What happens when Bucky meets Y/N, the exact look alike of the girl he used to love? (Social Media AU) (WIP) DISCONTINUED

ROSES: Bucky tells Y/N he’s the Winter Soldier. The next day, he’s taken by the government and that’s the last Y/N sees of him... until they cross paths again. But what if Bucky doesn’t remember her? (COMPLETED)

TO BE SO LONELY: When Bucky and Y/N signed up for this online penpal system, they never expected to grow attached to the other person behind the screen. (COMPLETED)

FALLING: Bucky has been distant lately. Y/N doesn’t know why. (COMPLETED)

THE BREAKUP CHRONICLES: A collection of imagines that can be read independently or as a whole fic about Y/N and Bucky’s relationship post-breakup. DISCONTINUED

one shots

NOT MY TYPE AT ALL: Y/N isn’t Bucky’s type but honestly, he doesn’t care about that anymore. (Not My Type At All by Jacob Whitesides)

SLOW DANCING IN A BURNING ROOM: Y/N knew that Bucky had to leave someday but that didn’t mean that she was ready when the day came. (Slow Dancing In A Burning Room by John Mayer)

CLOSE TO YOU: Requested! Bucky loves Y/N, he didn’t mean to snap at her. (Close To You by Rihanna)

LAST KISS: 1940’s Bucky tells Y/N that he got his orders. (Last Kiss by Taylor Swift)

KISS ME SLOWLY: Bucky keeps running away from Y/N. He doesn’t want to get attached. (Kiss Me Slowly by Parachute)

FALLING LIKE THE STARS: Bucky and Y/N fall in love but he’s sent off to fight the war. (Falling Like the Stars by James Arthur)

HARD PLACE: Bucky and Y/N can’t stop fighting and it’s getting too much. (Hard Place by H.E.R)

F&MU**: Bucky and Y/N hate each other… but they can’t stop letting their anger out through sex. (F&MU by Kehlani) 18+!

MAY I ASK: Y/N and Bucky see each other for the first time since the breakup. Y/N confronts Bucky on why he ended things. (May I Ask by Luke Chiang)

I WILL BE FOUND:  Bucky finally found the place where he belongs when he met Y/N but at times, he wished that he could somehow take the life he used to have and magically fit it into the life he had now. (I Will Be Found by John Mayer)

10 AM: REQUESTED! Bucky is hopelessly in love with Y/N. He stops himself from saying anything to her because he’s afraid of getting hurt again, not knowing how much more he can take in his lifetime. (10AM by Keaton Henson)

FLAWLESS**: Bucky and Y/N are friends with benefits. They found a new thing to play with in the bedroom. The Winter Soldier. (Flawless by The Neighbourhood)

CHERIE: Bucky doesn’t understand why Y/N is always so happy. He never thought he would be one of the people who got entranced by her until he was. (Cherry by Harry Styles)

TEE SHIRT:  Bucky and Y/N walk into a music shop and she hears the song her and her ex used to love playing in the background. (Tee Shirt by Birdy)

I’M LONELY: lex’s writing challenge! enemies to lovers; “Will you wait for me?” (i’m lonely by luz)

LOUD: Every time Y/N is afraid, she plays her music too loudly but this time, Bucky is there to comfort her.

BUBBLES: Short Bucky imagine about bubbles.

DOCTOR ME UP: Y/N is Bucky’s doctor when he wakes up in Wakanda. 

WHITE DRESS: Bucky loves her, so so much, especially as she walks down the aisle in her white dress. 

SHAWARMAS: Bucky has a crush on Y/N, the cashier from the Shawarma place. 

NO CLUE: Y/N and Bucky hate each other. Nobody knows why. Whenever someone asks, the pair just say, “I have my reasons.” Some think that something happened between them when Bucky was in hiding. Some think that Bucky did something to Y/N when he was the Winter Soldier. Some think that there’s no actual reason- they simply hate each other.

RITUALS: You died on a mission and all Bucky has left is the voicemail you left him before you got on the Quinjet. 

FAMILIARITY: Love is a foreign concept to Bucky. 

peter parker:

JEALOUS: Where Peter tells Y/N that he’s Spiderman and things go down. (Jealous by Labrinth)

#bucky barnes #captain america #winter soldier #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes imagine #frances writes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x yn #marvel #marvel imagines #marvel oneshot #peter parker

[subwaysurf45]

The Art of Sleep

Summary: Bucky Barnes was known to be reackless with his health, especially  when it comes to his sleep. Doing the bare minimum as a girlfriend you knew you had to make sure he was sleeping for midterms. Bucky couldn’t disagree more. 

Words: 5k

Warning: Angst, a little fluff, Bucky being an asshole for a while, edging breakups, insomnia, stress of midterms. 

Masterlist

It was pretty late and you were sitting alone in your bed, an empty bowl of popcorn beside you as the credits of your favourite movie rolled. You wiped your tears , gets me everytime and found your phone that was sitting, plugged in, on the small nightstand you found on the edge of someone’s yard, they had been trying to throw it out. 

You took your phone over to your bathroom, looking through the few notifications to see if Bucky had texted you. You two definitely had your cheesy goodmorning or goodnight texts regularly but since it was nearing midterms you wanted to make sure Bucky was getting enough sleep and actually going to bed - he had a habit of staying up really late. You could tell when he was lying about getting some rest, the bags under his eyes betrayed him as he pleaded to you he didn’t sleep at his desk last night. 

It was always a problem but it became a real issue last semester when he dozed off on a date. You had left to go to the washroom before leaving and ended up taking longer than needed as you went into a stall without toilet paper. You texted him to come in and help but he never responded, so you waited until everyone left before quickly scurrying to the next stall. 

When you walked out his chin was tucked into his chest and he was sleeping, he looked homeless with his stubble, messy hair, deflated face, and just a sad look in his eyes. It physically pained you in many ways as you became his human crutch, getting him to the car and having to drive his stick-shift because he was way too tired to operate a vehicle. 

YOU: hey honey, just thinking about you and wanted to say goodnight, I hope you get some good sleep 

The toothbrush vibrated in your hand as you brushed your teeth, phone still in your hand as you waited for a text back. Not in the sense that you wanted the immediate reassurance or that you expected for him to be waiting hand and foot for you, you just wanted to know if he was nearing sleep. He’d be honest in his texts, sometimes saying he was nowhere near ready to head to bed and there was nothing you could do to force him.

After brushing for a while and getting no response you tried again, deep down you were a little worried. Being optimistic was extremely hard because of past patterns, you’d be the dumbest person alive to think that he was sleeping and would see your text in the morning. No, that’s not Bucky. 

YOU: hey baby, me again, just want to make sure you’re all good - I’m heading to bed soon and just want to know if you’re in bed, your desk, the library, out getting food. Let me know!

Beginning to grow was the icky feeling, as you tried to think of something positive you could feel your gut telling you a different story. Still in your bathroom you looked in the mirror, looking at yourself as you took a deep breath in and out. 

“Don’t be a crazy girlfriend,” you whispered, “don’t be crazy, be logical,” your hands fiddled with the loose tank top you wore to bed, “he’s probably just sitting at his desk dialed in, like always.” you nodded at your reflection and glanced at the time, there was a pattern with his sleep habits and right now he should be in his room, but he would have answered if he was at his desk. 

As you tried not to be crazy you pulled out your phone again and called Bucky, getting to voicemail and not even bothering to leave a message. The next best option was to call Bucky’s roommate, Steve, it was the least crazy option than a hunt down mission. 

“Hello?” Steve’s voice cut in after the third ring. 

You sighed, “hey, Steve - look I know it’s late so I’ll cut to the chase,” you sat on the edge of your bed, “is there anyway you could see if Bucky’s in his room, he hasn’t been sleeping lately and I just want to know if he’s getting enough sleep or if he’s sleeping at his desk because that causes this massive knot on his shoulder which then-” 

“Yeah, I’ll go check,” Steve grunted as he most likely stood up. You waited with your hand over your mouth, aware of your rambling now. “He’s not there.” 

That pit in your stomach began to grow, “do you know where he is?”

“He’s normally calling his mom right now,” Steve said, “we’ve been having internet issues off and on but he doesn’t miss his call with his mom, you know how he is with his Ma.” Steve paused, “even if it wasn’t skype, he'd be phoning her right now.” 

“I’ll call his mom,” you offered, “that won’t make me seem crazy right?” 

Steve paused for a second, “I mean…” you could hear him scratch his head, “in this particular situation- no -you’re no crazy because he’s been a zombie these last few days, like, no sleep or food or anything,” Steve took a moment again, “it’s kinda sad to see your best friend slip away for one month each semester, he’s lost weight and just looks like a shell of himself. I’m just rambling, I’ll let you call his mother, let me know when you find him.” 

“I’ll take him back to my apartment, go to bed and I’ll text you so you can see in the morning,” you and Steve said goodbyes before hanging up, leaving you to wonder where he was. 

Calling Winnie made you look desperate, you knew that, but the fact that Steve didn’t know where Bucky currently is is a massive problem. With his altered state you knew he shouldn’t be driving but that could be where he is for all you know. 

Winnie picked up faster than Steve, “hello?” she sounded more urgent, “what’s going on?” 

You were confused for a second, “hey, Winnie,” you smiled so she could hear your happiness, “I was just wondering if Bucky skyped you earlier today?” 

“N-no,” her voice shook, “I’ve been trying to call him but he’s not answering at all, I was about to call you to see where he was - can you find him?” 

“Not yet,” you dropped your head into your hand, “I’m really worried and Steve doesn’t even know where he is, he’s never this silent.” 

“No he’s not,” Winnie quickly replied, “this isn’t good, this mother instinct or whatever it’s called is not looking too good. If I was closer I’d be breaking into every library trying to find him. Last week he was telling me about these papers and practice quizzes he needed to do.” 

“Yeah he told me about those too,” you sighed as you looked into your washroom, staring off into space. “It’s just that he normally responds, especially to a phone call.” 

“I know,” Winnie seemed distraught, “he’s not doing too well right now, he always gets in his head around this time. He-” she took a shaky breath, “he’s my little boy and he’s losing his mind over midterms and tests and I just want to give him a hug, it’s hard to listen and see him cry to you every week or couple of days, I can’t give him a hug.” 

“I know,” you nodded to yourself, “I’ll find him, alright?” 

“Keep me updated, please,” she pleaded. 

After you hung up the only place you knew you had to go was the library. The issue was there were multiple libraries, with different private rooms, and different floors. It would take all night to find him if you checked everywhere, you knew his favourite libraries but they had their perks and their cons. 

As you walked onto campus you saw a few kids walking around, leaving the facilities and heading home for the night. The moment you walked into the library you were met with the most deafening silence you’ve ever experienced, no one even looked up as you walked around. You checked desks and study rooms, interpreting groups or people just wanting a more secluded space. 

The few people who looked up gave you dirty looks, not understanding why you were aimlessly walking around and not finding a spot to begin studying. Being as quiet as possible, you looked around, even going into the men’s washrooms in case Bucky fell asleep on the toilet; nothing could be ruled out. 

It was no luck, you began your walk to another library. As you walked you texted Steve and Winnie, keeping them updated. You looked around Bucky’s contact information to see if you could get his location on your phone but he had that turned off, one of Winnie’s rules, but you also wanted to see if he was active on any social media recently. 

Instagram had nothing, so did his Snapchat, his messages didn’t have his location so you were at a loss. Finally you opened TikTok, maybe there was a location setting on there he forgot to turn off, you scrolled for a while to see if he had commented on anything or reposted something. Nothing, it was like he had vanished. 

Before closing the app you reached your school’s cringy TikTok page, they had just posted something and you decided to watch. You were just walking and Bucky had half a brain to know not to sleep in an alleyway, you needed something to keep you motivated. The video was about studying for midterms and the library having different perks. 

“You’re kidding me,” you watched the video again, having to listen to these annoying student body members speak. Looking closely you saw kids sleeping around the library as they recorded, they were in the background. “If he’s sleeping…” you trailed off as you watched. 

That stupid mustard colour windbreak stuck out like a sore thumb. 

Bucky was curled in the corner of a bookcase with his windbreaker being used as a blanket, his bag was his pillow as he peacefully slept while these kids showed off the white noise speakers used in this section of the library. No wonder he fell asleep, white noise knocks that grandpa out like nothing else. 

“Bucky, I swear…” you clenched your jaw and opened the library door, you knew exactly where he was. As you reached the third story and into the white noise area you saw the jacket. Very slowly, you approached him and kneeled down, seeing his peaceful face as he curled up into himself. “Bucky-Bear, wake up,” you whispered and jostled him around, “wake up.” 

“I’m almost done with the question…” he muttered and your heart broke, “...just…” 

“Honey,” you shook him a little harder, making him actually open his eyes. He looked around for a while before locking eyes with you, “hi,” you smiled, “it’s home time now, okay?” 

“Home time?” He was like a toddler when he was overtiered or just waking up, it seemed he was both right now. “I can’t, I have another-” he broke off into a yawn before leaning into your side, feeling your warmth as you rubbed both shoulders. 

“We’re going to my place,” you threw his arm around you and helped him stand, “this is getting out of control.” 

The walk to your place was silent, Bucky stayed silent as you grumbled about having to be his human crutch again. He knew you had been on him recently about getting a good sleep and here he was, sleeping in the library with his backpack as his pillow. Every so often he’d look down at you and see your stern face, just trying to get him home. 

“I’m sorry,” he offered as you both waited in the elevator. 

“Your mother was worried sick,” you said as the doors opened, “so was I, so was Steve- and Steve doesn’t worry about anything and yet he was worried about you,” you lugged Bucky out and towards your door. 

“I’m sorry,” was all he could say again. 

“Well I don’t think you are,” Bucky stood on his own as you unlocked the door, “I think you don’t care at all, you’re just saying sorry because you feel it’s appropriate for this situation,” you spoke harshly and Bucky looked offended, “because if you really were sorry, this wouldn’t be happening, this isn’t the first time,” you opened the door for him, “and if you really were sorry this wouldn’t happen again- we both know that’s dumb to even think that, right?” 

Blowing right past him and into your apartment left him stunned, Bucky slowly walked in. He was still waking up and not at all ready for an argument. He didn’t even know what day it was and here you were scrambling around the kitchen trying to get him some food, he just stood there. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. 

You scoffed, “I’m fucking sick of hearing that,” you turned around to face him, “you’re not actually sorry at all, at all.” you worked on the sandwich and Bucky slowly sat down, walking on eggshells around you. After pressing the bread together you almost threw the plate in front of him, but you slid it, “call your mom, you missed her skype call.”

“What day is it?” he asked but you walked right past him, “y/n?” 

“Look at your phone,” you called over your shoulder, “and while you’re at it, check all the missed calls you got, all the texts, and the worried messages from the people who love you and hate to see you like this,” you placed your hand on the doorknob, “the only reason I’m offering my bed is because I have a feeling you haven’t slept on a real bed in many nights, if that wasn’t the case you’d be on the couch.” 

“Yeah,” Bucky nodded, “I’ll be there in a second.” 

You could hear talking on the other side of the door, it was obvious Bucky had called his mom because of his little to no talking. The only thing he was saying was apologies, getting cut off and most likely berated for how reckless he was. You laid on your bed and reflected on how bad he was getting, sunken eyes and unkempt facial hair; he was not the kid you met at the bar with his stupid smirk. He was a completely different person, it happened every midterm and exam season. 

On the edge of sleep the door creaked open, Bucky was slowly making his way to the bed as he took off his clothes and stayed in his boxers. The bed dipped and you felt him get comfortable, you had rolled onto your side by now, curled up and trying to fall asleep. 

From his little twitches you knew he was awake, his breathing was steady but not deep enough for him to be asleep. He was on his back and you knew he normally slept on his stomach, he wasn’t even trying to make it seem like he was trying to get some shut eye for you. Waiting for him to do something, nothing happened. 

“Hey,” his voice caused your heart to jump, “I’ll be up and out early in the morning.” 

“What if I want you to stay for a day?” your finger began to play with one another, you were nervous to talk to your own boyfriend. 

“I-” he sighed, “I won’t really be here, I’ll be thinking about my work tomorrow and that’s not fair to you.” 

“A lot isn’t fair right now,” you quickly jabbed back. 

“Alright,” he sighed, annoyed, rolling so his back was to you, “I’m going to sleep.” 

“Good.” 

After a moment had passed Bucky ripped the sheets off of him and stood up, making his way to the door. You quickly sat up as well, letting the sheets pool at your waist, “where the hell do you think you’re going?” 

“I’m sleeping on the couch,” he threw open the door and slammed it shut, leaving you alone. 

“The hell you are,” you muttered and stood up, reaching for the door and whipping it open. You saw him already making his bed with a throw pillow and blanket you always had resting on the back of the couch, “you’re really going to get petty now?” you walked over to the couch with crossed arms, “you’re a fucking child.” 

“Maybe I am,” Bucky said as he slipped under the faux fur blanket, “but I’m not sleeping in your bed when I can feel you wanting to rip my head off.”

“I don’t want to rip your head off,” you threw your arms out to the side, letting them slap against your thighs, “you’re too sleep deprived, malnourished, fucking stupid to see what I actually want to do to your head is twist it on right!” you could see his confusion, “I want to make you think straight and see how you’re slowly decomposing right in front of me- during that study session you just took out of, how much did you actually obtain?” 

All Bucky did was sit up and clench his jaw, balling up the blanket in his fists. 

“Nothing,” you filled in the blank for him, “fucking nothing for what?!” you leaned forward, “you’re not actually learning anything, this doesn’t work and I hate to see you like this all the time it feels like-” you run your hands down your face, “I have to worry about myself and take care of myself while I also take care of you because you seem to put no effort into actually taking care of yourself- when was your last shower? Last proper meal? Last piece of fruit you ate? Huh?” 

Bucky was getting increasingly more angry, the redness crawling up his neck as the veins began to push against his skin. You could tell he had an arsenal of things to say to you, things to get under your skin and say just to hurt you but he held back, just staring at you. As you stared at him you could feel the anger like a radiator, you were surprised steam wasn’t blowing out of his ears. 

“I don’t need you to babysit me,” he snapped. 

“Then who will?” you cocked your head, “who’s gonna make sure you eat and sleep and shower, huh?” 

“Me,” Bucky stood up from the couch, “on my own terms.” 

“Your own terms is your fancy way of saying never, and you know that,” you crossed your arms, letting couch divide you, “this isn’t good for you, I know deep down you agree with what I’m saying.” Bucky just rolled his eyes, “I can’t be there for you all the time to make sure you’re okay-”

“Then don’t be there!” he screamed, “then don’t fucking be there and dump my ass, why haven’t you thought of that?!” You coward into yourself, feeling repulsed at what he was saying, “if you really, really hate how I handle myself then fucking leave me- I don’t need you to take care of me-”

“-Bucky-”

“In fact,” he paused for a moment, thinking about the words that were sitting on the end of his tongue, ready to leap out and stab you in the heart. “I don’t fucking need you at all.” 

“Get out,” you felt your eyes water, “get the fuck out,” you pointed to the door, “and fuck you for somehow making me the bad guy for just trying to make sure you were okay- being a good girlfriend and making sure the guy she loves-” he began to walk to your bedroom, you followed, “-is taking care of himself.” 

Bucky began putting on his clothes, not listening to anything you were saying. You kept talking, following him to your front door, trying to plead with him to stay as you also told him your point of view. Right before he was about to leave he turned around, “you’re a fucking leach, you know that right?” 

He slammed the door in your face, leaving you crying at your front door. Wondering if you had left him in the library…no, you couldn’t think about that now.

********

Waking up the next morning left you feeling almost more tired, you laid on your back and took in what had just happened last night. What it meant for your relationship, the things he said to hurt you. Am I a leach? Am I too clingy? Was I really overstepping? 

These answers could only come from Bucky because your biased opinion made you think you did nothing wrong, but if he stormed out like that then you must have done something to provoke him. Seeing if Bucky had sent you anything, you opened your phone to see a reminder sitting at the bottom: Bucky had a midterm today. 

YOU: Hey love, I know things got crazy last night but I just wanted to wish you good luck on your midterm, I know you’ll do great!

After a moment you watched to see if he’d respond right away, a bad habit that you were beginning to form. A moment passed and there was no answer, the midterm was later in the afternoon so he might be sleeping in. Part of you found that more comforting, the delayed viewing from Bucky made you reach out less nerve wracking. 

YOU: if you need a ride there or back from your midterm let me know, I was hoping to talk today about what happened but I don’t want that to affect anything today, just forget about it right now and ace that midterm!

Bucky never responded but you didn’t expect him to. You knew he was fully captivated by his midterm and you were not about to throw him off, testing for him caused a lot of anxiety and the last thing you wanted was to throw a wrench into his worries 

Not having a midterm today, you took the time to study at the library. You were planning on staying there for a while, having some snacks and lots of water to support your big study day. In your little corner spot you began to work tirelessly on your notes, while also keeping your eye on the time for when Bucky was done his midterm. 

Time did escape you for a while, your noise cancelling headphones keeping you in the zone. The only reason you saw Bucky’s text was when they appeared on your computer screen, they had gone to your phone but you weren’t paying attention to that at all. 

BUCKY: Hey, love, done my midterm and I’d really like it if you picked me up. I think a conversation would also be great, I just want to apologize. 

You couldn’t help the pout that formed on your lips. Though you wanted to hear him out and really lay it into him that his words hurt you could just tell he was feeling remorse, Bucky was never the type of guy to come after you; he just slipped up sometimes. 

Thankfully your studying schedule had given you a break right when you needed to leave, so you packed everything up and headed over to the gymnasium to pick Bucky up. This midterm overlapped with other degrees so they needed a large space for everyone to write, lots of kids were already heading out while you waited in your car. 

You leaned forward to try to get a good picture of him as he walked out of the building but he was taking a long time, instead of leaning you got out and rested against the hood of your car. Kids were leaving and walking right past you, Bucky had texted you he was done a few minutes ago and it didn’t make sense he was taking this long to leave. 

Once you saw the door open again you saw Bucky walk down the steps, a soft gasp left your lips when your eyes flew to the flowers in his hands. He was halfway down the steps when you finally made eye contact with him, only then did you see his bloodshot eyes. 

“Oh,” you cooed and ran up to him, accepting his bone crushing hug as he sobbed into your shoulder. “Bucky,” you sighed and brushed his hair back, you could feel the flowers press against the back of your head as he held you as tight as possible. 

“I’m such an ass and an idiot,” he cried, “I can’t bealive I said those things- I don’t know who I was last night but holy fuck I’m so sorry,” his fists balled up your sweater. 

Quickly, you led him to your car, helping him into the passenger seat. The two of you sat there for a while, Bucky just held both your hands in his own as he cried. His apologies came out strangled, like the sorrow was choking him.

“What hurt you the most?” he looked up and tear tracks were painting his face, “I need to know how badly I hurt you.” 

You sighed and looked out the windshield, “you called me a leach, Bucky.” 

His jaw was so clenched you could hear his teeth crack, “fuck,” he gritted out, “baby-” he scratched his stubble, “y/n, you have no idea how much I didn’t mean that at all. I don’t think you are a leach or too clingy or anything but perfect,” he looked over at you, “I just wanted to say something to make you go away even though you were right, I did need you to pull me out and I-...” he sighed and squeezed both your hands, “I get if you want time to yourself or you want to break up because of what I said- baby, I totally get it because what I said was just plain rude-”

“-Bucky,” you reached up and cupped his cheek. 

“Let me finish, baby,” he sighed, “you were so right and I’m still not fully back from where I was, I do need you and the fact that I had people worrying about me showed how far off the deep end I was. You were the only one who called me out,” Bucky took a moment, “and because of that I resented you for that moment, but I know now that what you did was the best thing that happened for me. If you want to stay with me or not.” 

You shook your head and took the flowers that were on his lap, “are these for me?” 

Bucky nodded, a new wave of tears forming, “I bought them on the way here because I just- I couldn’t think straight.” 

You stared at the flowers and occasionally looked up at Bucky. His eyes were swimming with sorrow as he waited for you to say something, maybe he wouldn’t get better and would keep doing this to himself. Or maybe he did see this as a wake up call, he’d never looked this upset before. 

“I forgive you,” you whispered. 

The dam had opened up. In an instant Bucky was sobbing uncontrollably, thanking you. He leaned over the center console as he promised to never do that again, holding you tight to his body because he was afraid to let you slip again. You could feel his relief as he dug his nose into your neck and breathed in your scent, something that always made him calm. Your nails raked up his back and into his hair, trying to get him to calm down and stop apologizing. 

When you had somehow lugged him into his room he collapsed onto the bed as he brought you down with him. You rolled him on his stomach and began to work the knots, you felt during the hug, with your fingers. It took him a moment to realize what you were doing but soon he was groaning as you worked through all the stress kinks in his back and shoulders. 

After a while you rolled down beside him, letting him wrap himself around you. You could feel his steady heartbeat and breathing, his hands spread wide on your body to feel as much as you as possible. 

“I’m so tired,” he slurred. 

“You’re getting a minimum of twelve hours,” you whispered, “and I’m not fighting you on that.” 

“I’m never fighting with you again,” he scooched closer, “you’re always right and I’m always too zombified to understand anything.” You just giggled and leaned into him more, intertwining your legs with his as well. There wasn’t a body part that wasn’t touching Bucky. “My mom says hi by the way,” he kissed your forehead. 

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah,” he made you look up at him, “she says you’re the best thing that happened to me, I thought you’d want to know because I fully agree.” You hummed as you fell asleep, the warmth and the love was the perfect drug to knock you out. As you edged towards sleep you heard a deep rumble from Bucky’s chest. “Fuck,” he whispered, “I’m never getting that close to loosing you again.”

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