#bucky barnes fic
nora babe i’m gonna need that roommate!bucky blurb asap. your giving bud so many ideas and wheewwww i can’t wait but i keep going back to roommate!bucky
— about time ; bucky barnes
abstract: bucky finally offers to help you cum.
pairing: roommate!bucky x f!reader
word count: 1,051 words
warnings: roommate to lovers, unprotected sex, mild sexting, masturbation, use of toy, praise kink, lots of dirty talk, size kink, oral (f. receiving), soft dom bucky — 18+ ONLY • MINORS DNI
When you saw that your new roommate was going to be someone named James, you didn’t expect that to be a six foot five man with looks that could kill and a heart of gold.
And a metal arm.
No, you thought you’d get a guy who loved video games and computer science.
Not a man who worked out, shirtless, in the living room as you nursed your hangovers with coffee, orange juice, and greasy breakfast foods which he prepared for you.
You also didn’t expect to have so many goddamn wet dreams about him.
Waking up feeling rested and chipper only because of the orgasm that woke you up.
There were worse roommates.
And tonight was one of those nights. The nights where you couldn’t sleep, tossing and turning, restless and fucking horny.
Your vibrator would have to do.
You just hoped that Bucky was already asleep when the low buzzing started, slightly muffled by sheets and pillows as you closed your eyes and let your imagination drift.
Drift to him.
Wondering how he would fuck. How he would eat you out and the things he would say to you.
The faint vibrations then snapped you out of your near orgasm haze.
It was your phone, your screen lighting up as you grabbed it and nearly choked on your own saliva as you read the text.
The text from Bucky.
Use me instead, Sweets.
Was all it read.
This has to be some sick joke. A way of him messing with you. You were sure that he would poke fun at you in the morning.
Your phone buzzed again.
Don’t make me beg.
Oh God. Oh God oh God oh God.
Maybe you were asleep. You’d somehow figured out how to shift and you were just living in a simulation.
Don’t make me punish you either.
You audibly groaned at the last text. A shiver running down your spine and then there was a faint knock at your door.
“Come in,” your voice was hoarse, watching the door creak open and then Bucky stepped in.
Shirtless and wearing a pair of grey boxers.
That’s when you realized you were practically naked — only a large shirt covering you under the covers.
“I can’t have you usin’ that poor toy anymore, Sweets.” He smirks, shutting the door and leaning against it.
You gulp in anticipation, tossing the toy to the end of the bed and sitting up.
“Atta girl,” he chuckled. “Not gonna need that anymore.”
He took a cautious seat on the edge of your bed, cocking his head as he looked you up and down.
“S’that my shirt?” He asks, smirk tugging on the edge of his lips.
You shrug, “s’mine now.”
His eyebrows raise in amusement, licking and then tugging his bottom lip between his teeth.
“I think I want it back.” His voice was just above a whisper now, darkened eyes watching the gears turning in your head.
“Fine,” you whisper back before grabbing the fabric and tugging it up and over your head revealing the rest of you to Bucky.
He groaned, closing his eyes and dropping his head as he let out a “fuck.”
The tension was palpable and thick, your heart beating fast before your lips collided with his.
It was everything he needed before you were on your back and he was between your thighs.
“Tell me what you were thinkin’ ‘bout, Sweets,” he purrs, kissing each thigh before you feel him flatten his tongue against your core.
Your fingers tangle in his hair, tugging at the roots as you moan pathetically, “you.”
He moans against your cunt, sending sweet vibrations through your body as you try to compose your thoughts.
“Was thinkin’ of you,” you’re almost panting. “Like this.”
You knew you were feeding his ego, but he was too good at eating you out that you didn’t care. You’d get on your knees for him.
Bucky’s lips wrapped around your clit, sucking and flicking the sensitive bud before he added his fingers to the mix.
Two thick, sleek and cold finger curled knuckle deep inside of you as he watched the way you shuddered.
“I know you’re close,” he breathes. “Don’t hold back for me, Sweets. Give in, give and make a mess for me.”
If Bucky talked you through every orgasm from here on out you could die happy.
He wasn’t done yet, wiping his mouth before standing tall and dropping his pants to reveal himself.
“Bucky!” You whisper yelled as he raised an eyebrow. “Are you—“ you stopped yourself out of embarrassment.
Then he smirked, “‘m gonna fit, darling. Don’t worry, I warmed you up. Gonna slide right in, get settled nice ‘n deep, okay?”
He way he whispered the words only caused a new wave of arousal to run through you before he was lining himself with your entrance.
“Hey,” his voice was soft. “Eyes on me, Sweets. Just look at me.” He smiled before pushing in a leaving you feeling full and satisfied.
He was right. He had warmed you up and while it was slightly foreign and mildly uncomfortable, he had filled you up soon after.
Bucky’s thrusts were slow and deep, savouring the way you felt around him.
“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this,” he groans.
Two strong forearms have you caged and locked in, but it’s exactly where you wanted to be now and forever.
“To have you under me like this, takin’ me like the good little girl that you are.” His pelvis bumps your oversensitive clit.
“It’s gotten really fuckin’ hard hidin’ my boners ‘round you too. Not with the way you have to reach up and grab practically everythin’,” he chuckles while fucking you.
“I always think ‘bout you…late at night with my hand jerkin’ myself off.” You’re clawing at his back, trying to get him closer to you.
“And now?” He looks down at you, “I get to see my pretty girl cum over my cock before stuffin’ you full.”
He snaps his hips, harsher and harsher before you’re crying in ecstasy and Bucky’s hips stutter and still inside of you.
The silence that fills the room next is comfortable, Bucky’s warm arms around you as he kisses your shoulders and face.
“About damn time.”
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summer days and sundresses
pairing: bucky barnes x reader
request: “maybe Bucky’s kryptonite are sundresses. He can’t control his reaction since he has feelings for the reader but never voiced them. It makes him act when he see’s others reactions and leads to pent up sexual tension sex because the both have been dancing around each other not admitting their feelings. SMUT and fluff please!” - @msunravelled
word count: 2.5k
warnings: smut, unprotected sex, fingering, handjob, swearing, semi-public sex, definite sundress kink, exhibitionism kinda, minors DNI
“Morning, Buck.” Steve and Natasha chorused as Bucky walked into the kitchen. He gave them a sleepy smile before making a bowl of cereal.
He joined the both of them at the island. “So, you have any plans today?” Steve asked, looking towards Bucky. He shook his head, still barely awake. “Come on, Barnes. It’s our day off. You should go out and do something. Maybe you could finally ask out you-know-who.” Natasha said, smirking at Bucky.
Bucky instantly straightened up in his seat and glanced around the room to make sure you were nowhere to be seen. The pair couldn’t help but giggle at his wide-eyed expression.
“She could hear you.” Bucky hissed. Bucky wasn’t normally super paranoid or jumpy, everything was different with you. Everyone knew Bucky was head over heels for you, well everyone except you.
“Why don’t you ask her out? You’ve liked her for two years. I guarantee she likes you too, but she won’t be single forever.” Steve explained.
The only thing that scared Bucky more than confessing his feelings was seeing you with another man.
The chemistry between the two of you was undeniable. You both had come so close to finally confessing, but it never happened. The team had been rooting for you both to finally get together.
They noticed the giddy smiles on your faces when you were alone together. They noticed how your eyes always found each other from across the room. They noticed how you both danced around your feelings for two years.
Then, you walked in.
Bucky was fucking mesmerized. He froze in his seat as his eyes trailed over your floral sundress. “Good morning guys.” You said, with a kind smile.
“Wow,” Bucky mumbled under his breath. He noticed how his heart sped up as he laid eyes on you. The dress ended right below your ass and fit you perfectly.
“You look amazing. This dress is gorgeous. Wouldn’t you say so Barnes?” Natasha started with a genuine compliment, but was always acting as a wingwoman.
Bucky choked on his cup of coffee, and he felt his face become eight different shades of red. “What? Do you not like it?” You asked. You had picked the dress out specifically hoping Bucky would like it, and you were really worried that it had the opposite effect.
“No no no. It’s great, it really is.” He rambled, having to mentally remind himself to look at your eyes and nothing else.
Bucky was reminded of why he had never asked you out: you made Bucky nervous, really nervous.
All he wanted to do was tell you how pretty you were and kiss you. Every time he tried to ask you out, he would say the wrong thing. Two years of pining had really gotten to him. There was no pressure towards the beginning, but now he wanted it all to be perfect.
You and Bucky knew how to perfectly press each other’s buttons. No one knew whether or not you both did it on purpose.
“I’m going to go out with some friends. I’ll see you all later.” You said, smiling as you left the compound.
“What the fuck am I going to do?” Bucky muttered under his breath. He ran his fingers through his hair, tugging on the strands. The stool squeaked against the floor as Bucky forcefully stood off and marched towards his room.
“Have fun with your cold shower, Barnes.” Natasha joked, unable to keep the smirk off her face. Bucky’s response was simple: his middle finger flying up as he walked away.
Somehow everyday it got harder for Bucky to keep his feelings a secret. Sometimes that was because all he wanted to do was pull you into his arms and tell you how much you meant to him. Sometimes it was because he wanted to pin you against the wall and make you scream his name. At this moment, it was the latter.
After a very long shower, Bucky knew he needed a distraction.
He headed out the side doors of the compound and walked over to the outside gym, where there were various weights and training equipment.
When a car pulled up in the driveway, it naturally took Bucky’s attention. He quickly noticed you in the passenger seat, and then he noticed a guy in the drivers seat. He felt his fists clench at his side as he watched the man’s gaze.
This mystery guy was having a hard time not letting his eyes roll down your chest. Finally, after what felt like years to Bucky, you got out of the car and the mysterious man drove away.
You quickly noticed Bucky outside. He was the only one around and he was shirtless, so it’s no surprise he caught your attention.
“Hey, James.” You said, giggling as you walked up to him. Bucky groaned and tried to hide his smile. He placed down his weights and took a sip of his water. “I told you not to call me that.” He said, leaning back against the cold, concrete walls of the compound.
Bucky hated when everyone called him James, but something in him almost found it cute when you did it. He couldn’t let you or anyone else know that though.
He could hear his heartbeat in his ears as you walked closer to him. “That’s a really pretty dress.” Bucky said, surprised that he actually said it out loud.
You gave him a small appreciate smile. Neither of you knew what to say. Bucky’s mind raced as he tried to come up with something to say.
“So how was your date?” He asked, the words once again coming out of his mouth before he thought them through. He wanted to hit himself in the face. He knew it made him sound jealous, but it just slipped out.
He waited, anxiously, for your reaction. You just stood there with your eyebrows furrowed, until you finally realized what he meant. “That wasn’t a date, Bucky.” You assured him. He breathed a sigh of relief.
“Why do you seem so relieved that it wasn’t a date?” You asked, a small smirk forming on your face. For the first time, you were taking a step towards confessing your feelings, or getting Bucky to confess his.
Bucky's eyes went wide. Part of him thought he misheard you.
He couldn’t come up with a single coherent thought, so he stood there in silence.
It forced you to make the next move.
You took a few more steps towards him, so you were only inches apart. You placed your hands on each of his shoulders. You were reminded that he was shirtless, as the heat radiated off his chest. “Were you relieved that it wasn’t a date?” You asked, cocking your head to the side.
The close proximity gave Bucky the perfect view down the front of your dress. He forced himself to look into your eyes and tried to ignore how close you were to him. He shut his eyes for a second, trying to stop the effect your dress was having on him.
“You have no fucking idea.” He said, quickly before pulling you into a kiss. You kissed him back instantly, letting your hands caress his chest as his arms wrapped around your waist.
He loved the feeling of your body pressed up against his. It felt perfect.
He quickly spun you around and pinned you against the wall. He ran his hands up and down your sides, wanting to touch you everywhere. He’d dreamed about what it would be like to hold you. It was passing all his expectations.
Your mouths met in a quick and passionate kiss. The kiss was rushed. You both had wanted each other for too long.
His tongue grazed over your bottom lip. You whimpered as he tugged on your bottom lip with his teeth.
“This dress has been driving me crazy.” He mumbled against your lips. His hands slipped under your dress and he grasped at your ass. “I hoped you would like it.” You said, smirking.
You pulled away to gasp for air, resting your head against the building. He peppered kisses down your collarbone, stopping once he got to the top of your dress. He left wet kisses all over your chest.
You noticed how his eyes had darkened with lust. He quickly looked around, making sure the two of you were alone. “Hey, I have an idea.” He whispered, cupping your face. You could tell from his expression that it was going to be a naughty idea.
“I wanna take you right here, sweetheart.” He told you, placing kisses in the palm of your hand. You felt like your face was on fire. You quickly looked around the empty yard.
No one was around, but anyone could come outside at any moment.
“Are you turned on?” He asked, as you squirmed under his gaze. You felt even more embarrassed as he figured you out. “But it’s so risky,” you complained.
He pulled you into another quick kiss. “I know that excites you. I can see it in your eyes, sweetheart.” He said, cupping your ass through your dress.
“Fuck me, Barnes.” You said, simply. As soon as you gave him permission, his hands were up your dress. He cursed under his breath when he felt how wet you were.
It was sinful. He should have been ashamed by how turned on he was already. He couldn’t help it. He had been dreaming of this moment for years.
His hand slipped under your lace panties. “You alright there, James?” You teased, feeling his erection pressed against your leg.
“You’re fucking dripping.” He mumbled, a quiet moan falling from his lips. You continued to smirk. You moved your hand under your dress and guided his fingers through your folds. “You gonna finger fuck me or are you just teasing?” You questioned.
The question brought him back into reality, and he curled his fingers inside of you. You whimpered and leaned your head back against the wall. “Not so cocky now, huh?” He said, proceeding to push his fingers in and out of you.
You jutted your hips against his hand. “That’s what I thought.” He said, chuckling. You made no effort to hide the moans that effortlessly fell from your lips.
He pushed his thumb up against your clit and drew tight circles. You squealed. His hand clasped over your mouth, while applying more pressure to your clit. “Gotta stay quiet,” he told you. You nodded your head.
You bit down on your lip, trying to hold back your moans. “You look so fuckin’ sexy when you do that.” Bucky said, meeting your lips in a kiss. You could feel his very prominent erection, still pressed up against your thigh.
You palmed him through his gym shorts, which weren’t leaving much to the imagination. “Oh, baby. What are you doing?” He moaned out.
“We can both feel good, just keep going.” You told him. He nodded, returning his attention to you. He added another finger, causing you to gasp. You gripped his cock through his shorts.
He noticed that you were already pulsing around his fingers. “Are you close?” He mumbled, breathlessly. You nodded, biting down on your lip. He moved his fingers faster. You leaned your forehead against his shoulder, you were panting as you slipped your hand into his shorts.
You tried to focus on making him feel good, but all you could think about was how close you were. You wrapped your hand around his cock, earning a groan from him.
“I’m really…almost,” you moaned, squeezing your eyes shut. You came on his fingers, calling out his name. “There you go, sweetheart.” He said, coaxing you down from your orgasm.
He moved your hand out of his shorts. “I want you to finish too.” You told him. He shook his head. “Please just let me fuck you up against this wall.” His words came out as a beg.
You could tell how much he needed you. You pulled his cock out of his boxers, rubbing your thumb over his tip. He cursed under his breath, pushing his hips into your hand.
You heard a loud ripping sound, and then saw Bucky put your ripped panties in his pocket. “I need you.” He mumbled, lining himself up. You were almost drooling as you looked down at his cock.
He slowly pushed his tip into you, not wanting to hurt you. “Please go faster,” you begged him.
You were literally begging for his cock, and he couldn’t resist. His pushed himself inside of you, until he bottomed out. You mouth fell open as you tried to adjust to his size. “You feel so good around me.” He praised, pressing a kiss to your ear lobe.
He grabbed ahold of your hips before thrusting into you again. You held back a moan and tugged on his hair.
You grabbed his hands and moved them away from your hips. You moved his hands to the back of your thighs before grabbing his shoulders and jumping up.
He realized what you were doing and caught you. “Look at you so desperate to get fucked against this wall.” He teased, wrapping your legs around his waist.
He began effortlessly thrusting in and out of you. All you could do was moan as he fucked you into oblivion.
“You feel so good.” You mumbled, connecting Bucky’s lips in a kiss. His mouth muffled your moans, which was good because neither of you were trying to alert the rest of the compound to your current activity.
His lips slotted against yours. He softly bit down on your lip, earning another moan from you.
“Do you know how fucking wonderful this dress is? Is that why you wore it? Did you know I wouldn’t be able to resist you?” He whispered in your ear. His dirty words made you whimper.
When you didn’t respond, he attached his lips behind your ear. He softly sucked on the skin, surprised when you let out a loud moan. “Is that your sweet spot?” He asked, repeating the motion.
You buried your face in his neck, trying to muffle the sounds coming from you. “I love making you feel good.” He told you, speeding up his pace.
The sound of his wet thrusts were only turning you on more. “I’m gonna cum, sweetheart.” He mumbled, pressing a quick kiss to your lips. “Me too,” you mumbled.
You could feel his thrusts start getting sloppier. You pushed your hips forward to meet his. Bucky let out a low grunt as he came inside of you. His thrusts were messy as he pulled your lips into a kiss.
It wasn’t long before you were cumming. You both gasped for air, trying to recover. You wiped his hair away from his sweaty forehead.
“I am so fucking crazy about you.” He said, grabbing the back of your neck and kissing you. “I’m pretty crazy about you too.” You said, with a giant smile on your face.
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And they could Never Tear us Apart - 1
Summary: Canon!AU Bucky doesn’t trust anyone but himself. But after you show up on his doorstep with a shoebox full of old HYDRA files, he finds himself in a very difficult situation: trust a spy or gamble with people’s lives.
Word Count: 1,947
Warnings: Language, Super Mild Violence
A/N: Here we go! This fic follows FATWS. I hope you enjoy this new fic, I will probably take a small tag list for this series but I plan to post every monday so you can follow @redgillan-shares and turn on notification. Happy reading!
Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist
Bucky paced the base with hasty steps, groaning under his breath while he waited for Sam to emerge from the locker room. He couldn’t stop thinking about Walker’s interview on Good Morning America.
“Even though I never met him, he feels like a brother.”
He’d gone on a walk then, tearing off posters of John Walker as the new Captain America before he remembered that Sam was at the military base near New York and decided to pester him about the shield instead.
“Does he know I’m here?” Bucky snapped, though the young lieutenant standing next to him didn’t flinch.
Torres kept his eyes trained on the sheet of paper he was reading, his unzipped backpack hanging off one shoulder. “He shouldn’t be long, sir.”
“Great,” Bucky mumbled to himself.
He took an immediate dislike to Torres. There was no logical reason for Bucky to be so cold to him but he couldn’t help it. Torres reminded him of the person he used to be; young, charming, friendly, easy-going... just your regular go-to guy.
Now he didn’t know who he was anymore.
Bucky was jerked out of his thoughts by the sound of a door banging open against a wall, followed by the sound of booted feet tramping across the open base. The sounds caught everyone’s attention, even Torres finally looked up from his paperwork.
They both frowned as they watched you flounce toward the only person in the room who wasn’t looking at you.
You looked absolutely dishevelled, as if you’d gotten dressed in a hurry; oversized black cargo pants, an askew tank top that revealed a white sports bra, and one boot. Still you carried yourself with confidence and authority despite the very obvious limp.
“What the hell is that?” you barked, shoving a crumpled piece of paper against the man’s chest. He had seen you but pretended not to. Instead he took his time to acknowledge your presence. You straightened your spine and lifted your head. You looked ready to explode.
“New orders,” he said. “Effective immediately.”
“He has no authority over me.”
“He’s Captain America. Now, suit up. They’re waiting for you.”
You looked down at the tactical Kevlar suit in your clenched fist and scoffed. “Tell Walker I’m not going to follow him around in a skin tight suit. I’m out.” You threw the suit in his face and stormed back to the locker room, still limping.
“I’m not his secretary, tell him yourself,” the man shouted to your retreating back
“I don’t care.”
The door closed behind you with a bang that echoed through the base. The room was silent for a moment before everyone went back to work. Torres let out a sound halfway between a whistle and a sigh and Bucky glared at him.
“’Don’t think I’d like to be on the receiving end of that,” Torres said with a friendly smile. “I’m thinking either water or fire sign, uh?” The deadpan look on Bucky’s face was enough to make Torres uncomfortable. “Yeah, never mind. I’ll go get Sam.”
“Yeah, you do that.”
Bucky muttered a quiet thank you in German before hanging up and pocketing his phone. After Baltimore, he knew that tracking down the people responsible for the new super soldier serum would require Zemo’s help.
Now that the correctional facility had agreed to let them talk to Zemo, he needed a plan to break him out of prison. Planning wasn’t his forte. He had vague memories of HYDRA higher-ups giving him orders and telling him about escape routes.
He had less than twenty four hours to come up with a plan that wouldn’t blow up in his face. On top of that, his actions would definitely put a strain on his relationship with Wakanda.
It was a necessary evil, a means to an end. Zemo wasn’t just obsessed with HYDRA, he also had connections with very shady people.
Bucky started climbing the steps to his apartment when something caught his eye. You were sitting on the floor with your knees pulled up to your chest, your arms wrapped around a shoe box. Reflexively, he looked around but there weren’t a lot of people in the street at –he glanced at his watch- 3:47 in the morning.
“Shit,” he mumbled to himself.
You looked up when you heard footsteps coming up the stairs, a bright streetlight illuminating your features. You looked guarded and apprehensive as he stepped out of the shadows. Bucky frowned under your scrutiny.
He paused on the landing, keys in hand, ready to use them as a weapon if needed. He stared at you; your eyes were swollen and bloodshot, dried tear tracks streaking your cheeks.
You wiped your nose with your sleeve and looked away.
“I’ve seen you before,” he said. “At the base. You were yelling at someone. You only had one shoe on.”
“Sounds like me.”
You sniffed and got to your feet as he approached. He jutted his chin toward the box cradled against your chest, wordlessly asking for elaboration. You swallowed hard and opened the lid, showing him the logo on the manila folder.
A fucking red skull with six fucking tentacles.
Bucky gave you an exasperated look and sighed, moving past you to open his front door. You followed after him and closed the door behind you. He removed his jacket and tossed it haphazardly over an armchair.
“What’s your name?”
He threw you another exasperated look as he grabbed a bottle of beer out of the fridge. He uncapped the bottle using his vibranium hand and took a swig. A little harmless show of strength. He watched you fight the urge to roll your eyes.
“Well, Classified, you can speak freely here,” he said, leaning against the fridge. “Though I’m sure you already know that.”
“I know you destroyed the listening devices,” you confirmed. “Those were expensive by the way.”
“I’ll write you a check.”
You snorted, though you tried to hide it.
He eyed you up and down, trying to figure you out. You didn’t look threatening, but maybe that was the point. Not a lot of men came home at the crack of dawn to find a pretty girl on their doorstep. The tears were a nice touch, added sympathy and vulnerability.
He wondered how many knives you were hiding under your jacket.
You took a cautious step in his direction, your eyes never leaving his, and set the shoe box down on the kitchen counter. He watched you take a step back, your expression neutral and your body language unthreatening.
Without taking his eyes off you, he sent the lid crashing to the floor and reached inside the box. He pulled out three hefty Manila folders, slapping them on the counter.
“There’s more,” you said quietly, wrapping your arms around yourself.
He glared at you, then pulled the box closer. Inside there were three VHS tapes, no labels, no protection cases. He took one an examined it.
“What is it?” When you didn’t answer, he raised his eyes to you. “What’s on ‘em?”
You tightened your arms around yourself and took a hasty step back, almost tripping over your own feet. You made a sound, something between a sob and gasp, and collapsed into the armchair.
It took you a few minutes to pull yourself together; you were so tired, so emotionally drained. You rubbed your hands over your eyes and massaged your temple distractedly. The throbbing pain behind your eyes was unbearable. You wanted to sink into the armchair and fall asleep.
Unfortunately, that wasn’t an option.
“Those are videos of HYDRA turning you into the Winter Soldier,” you finally said, your voice so quiet he almost didn’t hear you. You glanced sideways at him, unable to meet his eye but still trying to gauge his reaction.
“Where did you find ‘em?”
“I can’t tell you.”
The silence that followed only lasted a second before Bucky stomped over to where you were sitting and grasped your arm painfully, forcing you to your feet.
You recoiled and tried to pry your arm free but he tightened his grip and shoved you against the wall. He invaded your personal space, his nose almost touching yours. You hit your head on the wall trying to put some distance between you.
“Don’t play games with me, Classified,” he snarled, his nostrils flaring.
“I’m not,” you replied assuredly, locking eyes with him. His gaze was intense and probing, you tried not to show your discomfort.
“No?” he asked condescendingly. “Then answer me this. What’s a special agent doing at my apartment in the middle of the night with her little box of horrors?”
“I thought you deserved to destroy these tapes yourself.”
Your words left him speechless. He loosened his grip on your arm but did not let go. You pushed him away and put some distance between you. It was easier to think now that you could no longer feel his breath on your skin.
You stood in the middle of his living room, your arms wrapped protectively around yourself.
God, you wanted to cry. Not because he had hurt you; you were an agent, a sore arm was nothing, but because watching these videos had made you physically sick.
You had watched hours’ worth of footage of him being tortured, manipulated, brainwashed into an emotionless killing machine. It would remain forever etched in your memory.
You refused to cry in front of Bucky Barnes, though. It was embarrassing enough that he could tell you had been crying.
“What I saw-” You cleared your throat to get rid of the lump that had formed. “What I saw was so barbaric, so cruel,” you trailed off, aggressively wiping your nose with the back of your hand. You turned to him, your eyes shining with unshed tears, and pointed to your ear. “I can still hear your screams in my head... like... like a distorted noise playing on a loop.”
Bucky looked down at the floor, his expression guarded, slightly hostile, though when he finally met your gaze, his eyes were softer this time.
“If it were me on those tapes, I would like to destroy them myself,” you spoke in a gentle but firm tone. “That’s why I came here. I understand why you’re angry, I would be too. I wasn’t thinking clearly, I’m sorry. We don’t know each other and you... you have a lot on your plate.”
He sagged back against the wall, physically and emotionally exhausted. He processed your words in silence, his eyes assessing your expression, gauging you. He exhaled loudly and ran a hand through his hair.
“No harm done, Classified.”
You snorted. “Yeah, I don’t like that nickname.”
You exchanged tight-lipped smiles and a curt nod before you took a step toward the front door. Bucky saw you pause. You looked over your shoulder, your bottom lip caught between your teeth. He could see the conflict raging behind your eyes.
You crossed the room, stopped directly in front of him, and reached up to touch his cheek. He held your gaze, his eyes dark, intense. He was suddenly taken aback by your features; your eyes were so expressive, your lips so oddly tempting. Your eyes were sad and afraid, like they held a terrible secret.
Those videos had messed you up real good. It was written all over your face. You had heard and seen him being torn apart and put back together like a jigsaw puzzle; forcing together pieces that don’t fit because they have to go somewhere.
You ran the pad of your thumb over his bristled cheek. “You’re alive.”
You were gone before he could blink.
Part 2 (sept 27th)
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a/n: i dont have much to say other than that it's 1 am and i needed to get this out of my system. chapter 4 of play the game is underway, i promise. also, there will be a pov switch in this fic!
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. = POV change!
wc: 4.1k words
[ neighbor!bucky barnes x fem!reader ]
Every Friday night, without fail, you saw the light filter into your apartment.
Notice how you said night?
Yeah, it was almost two in the morning, by the way.
And why was there light coming through the chiffon curtains you had hanging on the rod above your window?
(Great choice on your part, by the way.)
Well, because of your neighbor.
You've seen him a few times, actually. Usually on the street outside your buildings, or just out and about. Never spoke to him, though. He was quiet, kept to himself. Didn't seem very friendly or willing to exchange a greeting if he ever saw you.
But you never took it personally. Maybe he was having a bad day. Every time you saw him.
But that's besides the point. The point right now is that you can see the lights blaring in your room. From the apartment across from yours.
Should it even be possible for light to travel that far? I mean, we don't even live in the same building. You think to yourself as you watch the colors dance in the dark.
You debate getting up and yelling out your window to tell him to shut that shit off or to invest in some blackout curtains. You were tired of sacrificing your sleep every week.
But then you decided against it, because you quite frankly could not be bothered to get up from the warmth of your bed. You'd tough it out for the night, but the next time you saw him, you'd have a few words for him.
The next morning, it was almost ten when you woke up. You didn't have your shift at the coffee shop you worked at until three, so you took your time in making your way out of bed.
You noticed the curtains of your neighbor's apartment were still open, but you could see his figure moving across the room. He was clearly on the phone with someone, and he didn't look too happy. You wondered what could have him so angry at such an early time of the morning. He seemed like a person who could use someone to talk to, someone who he could vent to.
But before you let your thoughts get ahead of you, you turn away from the window, heading back into your kitchen to eat breakfast and get ready for the long day ahead of you.
"Hi, what can I get started for you today?" You ask as brightly as you can muster at the moment. You were halfway through your shift, another three hours until close.
"Uh, just a large black coffee." The gruff voice says, and it takes you a second until you look up and look closely.
It was him.
"O-okay, that'll be $3.27." You say, and he hands you a five dollar note before grumbling,
"Keep the change."
"Thanks, and your name?"
He gives you a look that's asking, 'what the fuck do you need my name for?'
"For the order." You try and salvage your dignity, because it feels like the stare shrunk you to a speck of dust.
That's all he all but growls before turning back to find a seat.
As your coworker takes over the cash register, you grab the biggest cup and fill it with his desired coffee.
You try to not think about it too much, but the anxiety you feel rising up inside you and just calling his name to give him his coffee feels absolutely ridiculous.
"Are you just gonna stare at the cup or give it to the customer?" The voice of your coworker, Jenna, rings in your ears and you look up at her, snapping out of the trance you were in.
"Sorry, I'm just a little out of it today, I guess."
"Everything alright?" She asks, and you nod.
"I'm fine, it's just... that's my neighbor." You nod your head towards where James is sat, in the corner by the window as he watches the raindrops run down the expanse of the glass.
"The one who doesn't let you sleep?"
"Yeah, but I don't think he'd take it too kindly if I tell him about that. He seems to have a lot on his own plate anyways," You explain, and she just nods.
"Well, that sucks, but you still need ta' give the guy his coffee." Jenna smiles and walks back to what she was doing before.
You gently slide out from your spot behind the counter and walk to his table.
"Here's your coffee, James. Enjoy, and- uh, let me know if you'd like anything else." You tell him while placing the steaming cup in front of him.
He murmurs a thank you that you barely catch, but you don't quite have the time to sit and wait for more of a reaction.
For the next several hours, James sits right where he was. He doesn't do anything in particular, either. He just watches outside, as the rain continues to pelt down on New York City, and as people come and go from where they were.
Eventually, about an hour left until close, you offer another cup of coffee.
"Do you want a refill? On the house." You ask gently, waiting to see if you'll get brushed off again.
"Uh... are you allowed to do stuff like that?" He asks, and you're a bit taken aback at the sudden concern.
"I don't think you should worry yourself too much, James. Free coffee's free coffee." You smile lightly, and grab the cup before filling it up without his confirmation. You could tell he wanted to say yes but didn't want to seem rude.
"You didn't have to..." He grumbles, and you simply shake your head.
"I know, but you've been here a while, and what kind of employee would I be if I let a customer sit here without any sustenance?" Your lips ply into a tiny smirk, trying to get him to loosen up a bit.
He seems so guarded, defensive. Like any moment, he's ready to run if need be, you inspect to yourself.
"You'd just be a regular employee, Y/N." He says, but the way he says your name makes a shiver run down your spine; and you can't tell if it's a good or bad one.
You unconsciously look down at your name tag, pinned to your black apron that's branded with the café's logo.
"Well, I felt like being nice. I hope you can deal." Your voice comes out short, but he knows you mean no harm.
As you walk back to the counter, you see a small smile playing on his lips, but he doesn't allow it to manifest on his face. You take that as a small victory for your last hour of work.
The girl who works at this café is annoying.
But she's got a nice smile. And she's nice to me, Bucky thinks to himself.
He sips on the new coffee you'd just poured for him, without his consent, he thinks bitterly.
But it was a nice gesture.
Why can't you just take a nice gesture?
Because your brain's been scrambled eggs for 70 years. You don't know what to think about anything these days.
He watches you fiddle with the espresso maker, cleaning it with a rag, which you then dip into a bucket.
You look extremely familiar to him, but he can't exactly pin where he's seen you before.
Bucky closes his eyes for a moment, trying to recall where he'd seen you, but for a moment, he comes up with nothing.
Ever since he's been living back in the real world, he hasn't been outside too much.
He goes on the occasional walk, or goes to the tower to see Steve and Sam.
But other than that, he spends a lot of time in his Brooklyn apartment. He watches movies that Steve suggests, or he invites Steve and Sam over to have beer and watch TV with him.
He hates how lonely it gets, though.
Bucky wishes that he had someone.
Someone who could understand.
And don't get him wrong, he loves Sam and Steve. They fill in the gaps in his days, and they make them better.
Sometimes, thinking about having something to do that day is what makes it. He likes having something to do, something to plan for for when his friends come over.
But it feels like a teeny, tiny part of his life is missing. A person shaped-hole in his heart.
But Bucky doesn't spend too long thinking about it, or it'll send him into a spiral about failure and how he needs to 'push himself to get out there more.'
Or that's what his therapist says.
"Hey, we're about to close, and we usually throw the pastries out at the end of the day. Do you wanna take these home, by any chance?" Your voice rings in his ears, snapping him out of the impending slippery slope of his lack of love life.
He hesitates to answer for a second, looking at the brown paper bag pinched between your fingers.
Bucky can tell you were nervous when you spoke to him. He knew he made you uneasy, and it killed him inside.
He hated that. He just wanted to have a normal conversation with someone. But everyone seems to know who he is.
Who he was.
"Uh, what is it?" He croaks, unsure of what to say at your gesture.
"It's a few cookies and a chocolate croissant."
"Sure, I'll take 'em." Bucky simply answers, watching as you hand the bag over with a soft smile and watches you walk back.
You sweep up the floor and put up all the chairs, except for the one Bucky's sitting on. You leave his table alone, and bid farewell to your coworker who was scheduled to close with you.
Bucky doesn't know what drives him to do it, but he gets up after he sees you walk out the door, and follows you home.
Damn, if you like a girl, you usually ask for her number or somethin'. Not follow her home to make sure she's safe, you idiot. Bucky's inner voice speaks and sometimes, he wishes it would just shut up because he knows he has no game nowadays, but this is all he knows to do.
He realizes the way you're walking is familiar, and not at all of the way he was supposed to be going. That made him feel a little better, less like a creep. He's about half a block behind you, and when you turn onto the same street he lives on, he's really confused.
Did you know he was behind you? Are you trying to play a trick on him?
But before Bucky can speak up or say something, you walk right past his building, and into the one right next to it.
All of a sudden, images of you right on the street in front of your buildings flash through his head. He's seen you because you're his neighbor. Bucky's seen you right there, getting ready to start your run through the neighborhood, or probably on your way to work, now that he's seen where you work.
But he feels like there's somewhere else he's seen you; somewhere familiar.
He shakes his head, wondering why he's so caught up in you. He thought you were beautiful, but he feels a pull to you that he's never felt with anyone else before.
Bucky's hands move to unlock his door, sliding the key in and twisting the lock open.
He enters, staring at his dark apartment. It's moments like this, when he spends a long day alone, that he wishes there was someone.
Someone to come home to, to hug, to kiss, to share dinner with.
Some to fall asleep with at night. Someone to keep the terrors of the dark away.
But there was no one.
And then his mind thought back to you. Your hair, your face, your warm hands that touched his while you passed him the brown paper bag of treats.
Bucky wishes he was man enough to ask you out. Not even that, just to talk to you. Have a normal conversation, to get to know you.
But that wasn't in the cards for him anytime soon, he thinks.
For now, he focuses on taking things one at a time. And right now, all he wanted was a nice, warm shower and to get at least three hours of sleep tonight.
He's in his room, forgoing the lights for now, before he looks out his window.
For a moment, he believes his eyes are playing tricks on him.
There's absolutely no way that you are standing right there, right outside his window.
Well, in your own apartment, of course.
And there's absolutely no way in hell that Bucky is watching you undress right now.
As soon as you pull off your top, Bucky turns around before he could get more than a peek of your black lace bra, and he feels a burn in the pit of his stomach.
He can't tell if it's shame, guilt, or arousal.
You couldn't stop thinking about James all day.
After yesterday, you wondered why you couldn't shake this feeling about him.
He'd made it quite clear that he's not a people person. Or maybe he just wasn't a you person.
But again, you tried to not take things too personally these days.
Sometimes, you wondered, though, as you looked through your bedroom window to his some nights.
You imagined what it would be like, watching one of those movies with him at night. Making dinner with him. Having coffee in the mornings before work, wondering what he did for a living.
You chastise yourself for your thoughts, thinking that you were crazy for these ideas you were coming up with out of nowhere.
As you pull off your clothes to get ready for bed, you feel the same emptiness fill your heart when your head hits the pillow, and another day has gone by where you're all alone.
The next day, your shift was at ten in the morning so you were up early.
You took your time in rolling out of bed. The warmth of your duvet was holding you down, and you couldn't help take a peek out your window.
You see that the room facing yours is finally housing a body in the bed. In all the time you'd been living across him, you've only seen him on the floor.
You feel a warm flutter at that. Whatever reason led him to actually sleep in the bed last night was, you hope you played a role in it.
You make your way to the café, and although walking in the rain wasn't ideal, you made it, somehow.
You clock in and head to the register, ready to take the millions of orders that come in through the day.
"Hi- oh! Welcome back. What can I get you?" Your tone of voice made it clear you were surprised, but was trying to not let it show.
"Uhm, just the same as yesterday, and... Can I get a chocolate croissant?" Bucky's gruff voice tells you.
You ring him up, wondering if you should say something about him being your neighbor. Although, he didn't seem too keen on looking you in the eye right now, and you wonder if you did something to make him uncomfortable yet again.
He seems to have this issue quite often.
Little do you know, this time, it isn't because of you or anything you did.
Well, nothing you did on purpose.
Nothing you were aware of at the time.
Anyways, you tell James to go take a seat and that you'd be right out with his order.
"Here you go, James," you place the plate and mug on the table, and this time, when you hear him say something, you turn around with furrowed brows.
"Sorry, I didn't catch what you said." You apologize, waiting for him to repeat himself.
"I- nevermind, it was stupid anyways. You probably have to get back to work." He mumbles while looking back down at his pastry.
"James, whatever it is, you can tell me." You offer with a kind smile. "I can come sit with you during my break, if you don't mind?" A hopeful smile crosses your face.
"Uh, I- yes, yeah, that would be nice." He struggles for a moment, but finally nods his head in confirmation along with his words.
"Alright, James. I get off in an hour for my break." You simply tell him with a soft grin, and you can practically feel his eyes burning into you as you walk away.
The blush creeping up your cheeks also stays there until the remainder of your shift.
As you plop in the chair across from James, you inspect him for a moment.
He was attractive, you'll admit.
Okay, he was more than attractive.
"So, James, where are you from?" You ask, your own cup of coffee in front of you on the table.
"Well, I'm Brooklyn born 'nd raised. Never was a time I didn't live here. You?" His lip twitches, looking out the window fondly.
"That's nice. I moved here when I was nine, so I guess I've been here a while. But no matter where I go, there's nowhere like home." You smile.
"There really isn't, huh? This place is irreplaceable." He gives you a crack of another smile, and you find yourself yearning for more from him. Just a tooth, something.
"Well, do you live around here?" You ask, deciding to play coy. You wanted to see what he'd say.
"Uh, yeah, actually. Over on DeKalb and Clinton." He clears his throat, the hint of a smile on his face melting right off.
"Huh, that's so funny. I live on those streets too." You grin, waiting to see his reaction.
"O-Oh really?" James doesn't really know what to say without giving away that he knows where you fucking live.
"Yeah, isn't that funny? Which building?" You're pressing, and you know he knows, but you're having your fun right now.
"T-the uhm... I live in the Washington." He's now making zero eye contact with you, and you're close to breaking.
"What a coincidence! I live in the Oakley!" You're in a fit of giggles when his face drops, you just can't help it anymore.
"James, can I tell you something?" You ask in a coquettish manner.
"Yeah, I suppose you'll tell me even if I say no." He gives a tight smile as a joke.
"I don't wanna sound like a creep, but I knew you lived in the Washington."
"Oh," James releases a breath of relief, "thank God. I knew you lived in the Oakley, but I didn't wanna sound like a stalker either." He says.
You laugh, sliding a hand on top of his resting on the table.
"Y'know, you do this really annoying thing where you leave your movies running on full brightness on your TV, and I can see it through my windows at night." You laugh at the incredulity of the situation.
"Oh... I never even thought of that. I'm sorry, Y/N." He looks genuinely remorseful, and now you feel bad for any bad thought you've had about the man that lives across from you.
"It's alright. No big deal." Your smile does a good job of convincing Bucky that you truly weren't bothered by his actions, but he still felt bad.
"Y'know, maybe I could make it up to you?" He asks, and you feel a blush moving up your chest. "Like, maybe over dinner?" His voice is timid, you can tell by the way he tilts his head down while speaking.
"James," you slide your hand into his this time, your smaller one resting in his large metal one. "I'd love to go out with you sometime."
Before he could react, you stood up from the chair.
"My break's over, but I get off at 3." You lean down and pull a pen from your apron, scribbling your number onto a napkin. "Here."
You walk away before he could say anything, but there's something about him this time that you notice.
He's blushing, too. And he's smiling. A bright, white, blinding smile.
You think of that smile throughout your whole shift, until you see he's still waiting for you when it's time to go.
"So, do you like Chinese or Italian better?" He asks with a crooked smile.
six months later
You and Bucky are laid across your bed, the TV blaring a movie that neither of you are paying attention to. Your head is resting on his shoulder, leg thrown over both of his, and his hand running through your hair.
"You wanna know somethin' doll?" Bucky asks, and you feel his chest rumble under your head.
"Yeah, everything okay?" You ask while leaning up on your elbow to get a good look at him, trying to gauge his mood.
"Everything's okay, just remembered something." He laughs, his hand moving to hold your jaw in it. You shivered at the touch, but smiled fondly at the action.
"When I first saw you at the coffee shop, that first day when you gave the free coffee and pastries... I followed you home."
Your brows furrow and it's clear that you were confused as to why.
"I wanted to make sure you got home safe, and then it turned out that you lived right next to me. So I went up to my apartment and wondered what I'd done right in a past life to have you live right next to me, and then I saw you lived right across from me." His face was tipped upwards, like he was replaying that night in his head.
"You followed me home just to make sure I was safe?" You asked in disbelief that he did something so nice for you, when at the time you thought he hated you.
"Of course, sweetheart. It was dark out and there 're some real jerks out there, y'know." One corner of his mouth lifts up in a soft smirk. "Didn't want anything to happen to ya."
You lean down and press a kiss to the corner of his mouth, appreciating his gesture.
"I really thought you didn't like me back then, so this is a nice little secret you've been hiding from me." You giggle when he pulls you back in for a real kiss.
"Yeah, well, I don't think I could'a hated you if I tried, baby. You're too sweet. And at the time, I was still getting used to being out in the open without being a national security threat." You both laugh lightly, dropping your head down.
A moment passes where you bask in his words, letting them soak in. And then a thought hits you, and you can't help but become more curious. Now you need to know the answer.
"Hey, can I ask you something?"
"Sure, hon." Now Bucky's brows are pulled together, and you reach up and smooth out the wrinkle with your thumb.
"Did you ever... see me doing anything in here? Like, I usually keep the curtains open, and even if they're closed, they're pretty see-through..." You trail off, giving him time to craft his response.
You have a feeling you know the answer, considering how he turns red like a tomato in an instant as words leave your lips.
"I... there was this one time, but I swear, I wasn't trying to peep on you or anything, it was the same day I followed you and I just so happened to look into your window, and you were getting undressed, but I swear, I turned away as soon as I saw what you were doing, baby-" He was rambling, trying to save himself from sounding like a complete creep after all he's just told you.
"Did you like it?" You ask, innocently, but he knew what you were trying to do.
"I-I- You were getting undressed, sweetheart, of course I liked it... are you kidding me?" Bucky's grasping for the words, trying to make you understand.
"Well... we could always recreate it, but maybe in the same apartment this time?" You cock your head to the side, your doe eyes stirring a feeling in his abdomen.
"I think that's an excellent idea, honey." Bucky's hands grasp your waist as you slide on top of his lap. "After all, I am a hands on learner."
fin. i hope you enjoyed!
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What Has Been, What Can Never Be Masterlist (coming soon)
Summary: Steve Rogers had returned to the past, hoping to move on from the chaos of the future. Leaving the woman that had loved him as someone more than just the persona of Captain America and his best friend that has always been with him until the end of the line.
But as he had come to settle in this new life back in his own time, regret was somehow coming to follow. When he decides to return to the present, things have changed and you, the woman that had always promised to be there for him was now happy with his best friend as the two of you moved on with your lives without Steve Rogers in it.
Characters: Bucky Barnes x Witch!Reader; Ex!Steve Rogers x Witch!Reader; Steve Rogers x Peggy Carter. Sam Wilson. Helmut Zemo. Sharon Carter.
Series Warnings: Post-Endgame. Post-TFAWS. Angst. Smut. No Closure to a Breakup. Profanities. Talks about Death, PTSD, Anxiety, Alcohol Consumption. Other specific warning to be added per chapters.
A/N: Shout out to @secretsthathauntus for giving me this idea. Hope to be able to make justice to this one. Thank you so much~
For The Ones That We Lost
For The Ones That We Gained
For The Ones That Has Regrets
For The Ones That Never Recovered
For The Ones That Finally Moved On
For The Ones That We Cherish
For The Ones That Come to Realize
For The Ones That Never Lives
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𝐚𝐬 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐞
summary: your boyfriend was always there for you even though it was not from the start, as long as you’ve had him.
warnings: fluff (in extreme amount), not that much angst, smuut, grinding, oral, face riding, unprotected sex, drunk state (no drinking though) —not sure if this makes it dubcon—, mentions of masturbation for both parties, some voyeurism, creampie, size kink, usage of pet name. (kitten, angel, baby, dollface), chubby!bucky, bucky is also retired if that makes sense, a bit body insecure bucky, engagement, minors dni | 18+
a/n: i just wanted that can makes us smile, hope to see some feedbacks (reblogs/comments)
You were almost going to fall down when you opened the door, but two strong hands held you before you could make it to the floor. You didn’t even remember putting the key in the keyhole, so the door must be surprisingly opened.
“Wow! You are stable as a fish in a vodka bottle.” He sighed as he tried to make you stand on your feet. He helped you to make your way onto the couch, getting your bag from your hands and taking off your heels.
“Did you enjoy your party at least?” You shook your head, trying not to vomit on the beautiful rug you bought on sale.
“‘missed ya.” You said those words without vomiting. Eyes still closed, because if you opened them you knew you would vomit.
“Yeah, you’ve sent me at least twenty texts about missing me, and what you were going to do with me when you get back. After that it was just a combination of random letters.” You chuckled yourself as your fingers rubbed your temples.
“I’ve made you some coffee, you need to at least sober up a bit. Don’t fall asleep before I get back.” You nodded, shaking your hands and signalling him that he needs to be quick.
You tried to sit up, abruptly. Before falling back again. You’ve heard your boyfriend’s gentle chuckle as he put his hand on your back to support you. “Here you go. It’s not too hot, I know you don’t like it like that.”
“What would I do without you?” You mumbled as you raised the mug to your lips.
“Well, considering we were roommates before we started dating. You would still be on the debt and have the chance to lose your place.” You chuckled to him.
“Yeah, and who would watch me masturbate? Long time before deciding to join.” You blurted it out, the start of your relationship.
“You knew I watched you.” He said, his cheeks getting the colour of soft pink. This detail of your relationship was not something he was proud of.
“Sure did. I put on several shows just for you.” You said as you gave him the mug back. “My one and only fan.” You winked at him, and he shook his head.
He softly smiled, leant in to kiss your temple. “Yeah, I’m just glad you didn’t give my old body a heart attack.” He said as he helped you to raise yourself. “Let’s get you in something more comfortable.”
“Are you going to let me wear something from you? You never do.” You giggled when you tripped on your own foot. He held you again before you fall. Holding your shoulders as he walked you towards your room.
“It’s because you own every top I have, kitten.” He said as he opened a drawer from your comforter. Shaking the red Henley in his hand. “Such as this one.” He said while walking over to you.
He raised his hands in the air, making you copy his gesture. “Let’s take this top off, it’s a bit tight for you to sleep in.” He explained as he took off your top, and helped you wear his Henley. “That’s a good girl. Now I’m going to take off your pants, alright?”
You nodded, staying still as he unzips the zipper and pulls it down from your legs. “Hold on to me honey. You’re not great with balance.” You did as he said, holding on to his shoulder as he took it off one leg at a time.
“Time for your bra?”
“Now you’re a pro of taking it off. You’ve been struggling at the first times, remember.” You added as he dipped his hands inside from your shirt. You giggled when the cold metal made contact with your skin.
“I don’t like this, it prevents the easy access.” He shrugged as he tossed the material off from your body to the ground.
“You always have access when you want to touch me. Like rightnow. ” You slurred the last part. Slumbering on your bed, and soon Bucky followed you.
“I know, I wouldn’t control myself, you’re my addiction.”
“So if I asked you to just kiss me, would you do it? Even though I’m drunk as fuck.”
He opened his mouth to say something, but all his thoughts stopped when he saw you making puppy eyes. He groaned as he leant down to kiss you.
Unlike him, a retired super soldier, you could be fast when he gets lost in the kiss. So in mere seconds you were straddling him, hands going to the back of his back.
“I missed you, you didn’t come to the party. You need to make up for it.” You cut him short, grinding on his semi hard cock.
“You know I don’t like the big parties. Also it was one of your girls only party, who are not my biggest fans.”
“Like their partners are so perfect.”
“They think I don’t deserve you.”
“Since when you care about what other people think. If you do care that much, I think I’m the luckiest gal in the world since I have you right here between my legs.” You both laughed at your joke. His flesh hand snaked behind your back and pulling you in for a soft kiss on the lips.
“I love you, but you’re not lucky as me. You’re gorgeous.”
“You’re drunk.” You said, rolling your eyes as you gave him one more kiss.
“I didn’t drink, you on the other hand, drank for the both of us.” He chuckled, placing his hands on the both sides of your face. His metal thumb brushing along your cheekbone.
“So I did. What the hell, I made it home. I made it to you. And I love you so much that I couldn’t stop myself from thinking all the thing I want you do to me, when I get back.”
“Yeah, you even sent me some links too.”
“Did you watch them?”
“Of course. You know I like it when you send me those, my angel is not innocent after all.” His hand went your waist, holding you while you were softly grinding yourself to him. “I also like seeing you on top.” He admitted, raising his hips a bit more to feel you better. You moaned at the feeling. Smiling when you realised that he turned you into a bitch in heat. You were always needy of him.
You started grinding your hips a bit faster. Pressing yourself on his now hard cock. He placed his other hand on your hips, gently holding you, because how could he deny you when you needed him that badly. “Shit! Bucky you feel so good.” You let it out under your breath.
“I want you to fuck me, please! Please!” Your hands went to his pyjama buttons, taking out his cock and you clumsily slide your underwear to the side. You needed to feel him. You gave his cock few strokes before sitting on it.
“Fuck!” He moaned when he felt your slit around his cock. You were so wet that it was a miracle he didn’t slide inside you yet.
“You see what you do to me? You’ve made me all wet and needy. I didn’t even took my underwear off.” You mumbled. “I need you inside me, Bucky. Please, I need it so bad.”
He leant over you, standing on his elbows to kiss you. You both moaned into the kiss, when you aligned his cock with your entrance as his hands found and ripped your underwear.
You whimpered on his parted lips when he was seated inside of you. You threw your head back with the pleasure, as he placed open mouthed kisses along your neck. Teeth nibbling and biting around the sensitive spot of yours.
“Use me, I want you to fuck yourself on my cock.” He said, thrusting his hips inside of you. You took it as a sign to move. You both were moaning, hands can’t decide to where to hold on.
“You feel so good Bucky! I found heaven!” You said, hands going his large tshirt, trying to take it off. He tried to stop you, afraid.
Even though you’ve caught many glimpses of each other while you were naked, he was still hesitant about showing you his body.
“Please! Let me see you.” You whispered, kissing his rosy cheeks. “I love you Bucky. You’re the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen.” You mumbled. Slowly taking off his top, smiling when your hands found his chest.
Your fingers played with his chest hair. Before you could say anything he slammed his lips on yours again, making you wrap your arms around his neck. “My beautiful girl.” He whispered on your lips. Pulling you close to him. His hands went to your butt, harshly squeezing it.
You moaned on his lips. As he placed a slap on your butt. “Naughty girl. You couldn’t spend three hours without my cock filling you!” You nodded, feeling proud of your hunger.
“Fuck! You’re so big!” You mumbled, feeling your walls clench around him tighter as the sweet pleasure inside of you was building.
“Yeah?” He asked, hands inside your his Henley. Playing with your erected nipples, taking one of it between his warm lips.
“I’m gonna cum. Can I cum? Please?”
“Cum all around me kitten.” He leant on your other nipple, sucking on the soft flesh when your orgasm hit you.
You came all around his cock, your body feeling tired since the caffeine of the coffee left your body.
He pulled out, slowly with a pop sound. “You’re always hard to last long when you’re drunk.” He chuckled as he kissed along your body, lifting his shirt to place kisses on your stomach.
“Sit on my face, kitten.” You smiled, doing as he wanted. You felt yourself getting wet when you felt his stubble brushing along your clit.
He licked a thick strap along your slit. Making you cry again. He moaned when he felt your taste around his tongue. He lazily draw circles around your entrance before going back to suck your swollen clit. “Mmhm! Bucky!” You moaned, hand going to his long hair.
“I love your taste, kitten. I can spend hours if I have to, but you...” He said as he licked his metal finger before shoving it inside of you. You yelped under him. “will come for me.” He rutted his hips on the sheets, diving back to suck on your clit as he slowly fingered you.
He pulled out his fingers, licking and sucking them clean before he got on his knees again. “Mmhm Bucky.” You giggle, seeing his cock almost turned into purple, that was your effect on him.
You knew you were close to cumming, you always loved how good he was with his tongue. The pressure on your belly was increasing at each stroke of his tongue. You were uncontrollably moving your hips on his tongue. “I—I” You mumbled, couldn’t stop your moaning.
“I know kitten, go on.” You came down. Chest panting rapidly. You threw yourself next to him, he climbed on top of you. Peppering kisses starting from your thighs to your collarbones.
He aligned his cock to your tired entrance. Rubbing it in circles. “My good kitten.” He explained as he pushed into you again. You could almost hear him move between your slick walls.
He started slowly moving inside of you, raising your knee to your chest. “Baby you feel so good.” You gasped when he hit your sweet spot with the new angle.
“Yes!” He moaned when he bottomed out, hands holding yours. He placed them above your head before he fastened. He was going fast and rough, your walls pulsating around him. “Fuck! So good! That’s my good kitten, taking me in!”
The sex was filthy and messy but you didn’t care. You didn’t care the fact that half of your clothes were still on you, you didn’t care you forgot to shave. You didn’t care your make up was still on your face.
You didn’t care any of it, all you cared about was your boyfriend between your legs.
He leant down, biting down your shoulder to trying to control himself. It was a hard for him considering how much of a mess he turned you into.
“I love you.” You whispered on his lips. “I’m in love with you Bucky Barnes.” You added before kissing him again, leaning your forehead on his.
“Fuck!” His hips stuttered inside of you, he was close on the edge. You telling him that you loved him still did the trick.
His fingers went to your clit. He pinched and swirled the little bulb, making you cry under him. “Bucky!”
“Come for me, kitten. One more, you can do it.” He said, caressing your cheek.
“Bucky cum inside me, please?”
“Yeah, you’d like don’t you? Want me to fill you to the brim?” He stayed inside of you for one second, pulling the top so he could kiss your breasts. Sucking and biting your swollen nipples from his early attack. “You’d like me to get you stuffed, right? You don’t need to say it, ‘can feel how you squeeze me.”
“Yes! I want all of that! Please Bucky, fill me up, please.” You wrapped your other leg around his waist. “Please, I want to feel all of you.”
“Fuck!” He said as he emptied all of him inside of you. Pulling out with a hiss.
You smiled when you wrapped your arm around his torso. “Thank you, Bucky.” You plated a kiss on his exposed chest. He chuckled, petting your head.
“Are you thanking me for fucking you?”
“I swear there is not one single day which you don’t surprise me.” He said as he fixed his boxers, moving towards the bathroom. “Stay awake for a few minutes, kitten.”
Before you could ask him why, he came back with a box of make up removal tissues. “Told ya these were handy.” He said as he sat down, cleaning your make up. “‘Shouldn’t sleep with that.”
You could feel your tears building up. Smiling at the care he showed you. “You’re an angel Bucky Barnes.” You murmured as you wrapped your arms around his big torso, kissing his chest.
“I’m just trying to be worthy of the hottest, nicest person I’ve ever met.” He admitted, kissing your temple. “Now get some sleep, tomorrow would be a long day.”
“Ugh!” You turned around in the bed. The light going right through your eyes, because you both forgot to close them.
Your arm reached out where your boyfriend was supposed to be, but instead you found lukewarm sheets. You huffed when you raised your head, smiling at the scent of toasted bread reaching at your room.
You lazily got out from bed, smiling at the familiar ache between your legs and the light breeze coming from not wearing any underwear. You made it to your kitchen, smiling at the sight of your boyfriend cooking, not wearing any t-shirt but just his boxers. You loved that sight.
You wrapped your arms around his naked torso, placing a kiss on his shoulder. “mornin’” You mumbled to his skin, feeling his body shake with his chuckle.
“How are you?” He asked, his voice had a little bit worry.
“A bit tired. Not the end of the world, yet.”
He smiled at your answer, turning around your arms and kissing your cheek. “‘m glad. Why don’t you get to the table, I’m almost finished here.”
You nodded, hearing your phone buzz. You switched your direction and headed towards the noise. “Bucky, have you seen my phone?”
“Nope! Could be in your purse though.” You nodded, checking the coat rack where your purse was hung. When you reached to check your phone you noticed it was Sam calling you.
“Hey! What’s up?” You murmured.
“Hey dollface! Just wanted to check up on you, Bucky didn’t answer my texts.”
“Oh he’s in the kitchen making breakfast.”
“Oh! Really so it’s like you said yes, I’ve told him there was nothing to worry about—“
“Hey baby, who’s calling?” Bucky walked towards you and you mouthed the word Sam. You saw the worry in his face as he walked towards you, but you stopped him by raising your hand in the air. Taking a step back.
“Yes to what? I was really drunk last night, don’t remember anything about him asking me something.”
“It was uhm— if you’d like to come to visit me and Sarah in Louisiana, since it’s been so long from the last time you’ve seen us.”
“Oh, uhm sure, I’ll talk with Sarah and the details. ‘ll see you later.”
“What did he say?”
“He mumbled something about Louisiana. I guess we’re heading there.” You said after putting your phone back in your purse.
“Oh, yeah. Y—You’ve been working a lot, a—and I thought that you deserved a little br—break.” You noticed the small bulge in the pocket if his jacket.
“Nothing.” You frowned again, hand dipping inside the pocket to find a small box.
“B—bucky? What’s this?”
“It’s—“ He walked over you, getting on his one knee, gently taking the box from your hands.
“I know how you feel about marriage, but I wanted you to also know how I feel about us—this relationship. You’ve made it possible for me to see a different side of me I haven’t seen in decades. I want to have you, by my side as long as you have me.”
“Ask me.” You managed to say it without breaking into tears, voice still cracked but he was in no position better.
He chuckled, opening the box to show you the elegant ring with a small emerald that was in the shape of a heart. “Will you marry me, kitten?”
“Yes!” You said as you threw yourself all over him. Connecting your lips with his. “Yes! I’ll of course marry you! Yes!” You said between kisses.
“I wanted to do this in a better setting, not in my boxers and not you only wearing my Henley and panties. I didn’t want to do it in a situation that you’re drunk too but—“ He tried to explain as he put the ring. Kissing your lips.
“ain’t no better time than present right?” He chuckled, tears falling down on his cheeks as he kissed you again.
You wrapped your arms around his neck, giving him a longing messy kiss. You didn’t care that he was sitting under you, only in his boxers. You didn’t care that you didn’t even wear panties during your proposal.
You started grinding on him slowly, as he took of your Henley and threw it across the room. Pulling you down to his lips, kissing you again as you took off his boxers.
You didn’t care your first sex as an engaged couple happened on your cold floor, and it was messy and rushed.
You didn’t care about any of it, as long as you have had him.
And you’ve had him.
248 notes · View notes
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Word Count: 1,750
Warning(s): Excessive of use of fuck in all its forms bc idk I think it’s my signature by now, Implied Smut, Profanity / Language
A/N: For that one anon, you know you are (bc I don’t lmfao). My other works if you like this one: Masterlist, Jealous sex with Bucky, Beefy!Bucky gets a little jealous
+ I know I’ve been leading ya’ll on in a few of my last posts but oh well you guys need a smut detox anyway!! + Do these count as drabbles guys?? Lemme know
Summary: Bucky lets his insecurities get to him when he sees one of Tony’s friends flirting with you, all he needs is a little reminder.
+ My gifs never really correspond with the fic content I just like to look at Sebastian Stan
Bucky is working on himself.
He’s a lot better than before, not such a short fuse, harder to anger, more understanding. But still, when it comes to you it takes very little to rile him up, and right now, he’s fucking riled up.
He didn’t even want to be here, that’s first. But he is, dressed dapper and all because you had convinced him his attendance was important, that the other team members were counting on him, that this was a team effort, and that you’d accompany him as a plus one of course.
He’s about two seconds from telling them they can go to hell. Them and all their participation points and teamwork bullshit. He’s Tony’s friend, which already puts him on Bucky’s bad side, but for the last half - hour he’s had to watch him flirt with you nonstop. Flashing his stupid, rich, playboy smile like it’s a black card, keeping you at the bar when you should be with Bucky.
“- isn’t that right, buddy?” Steve asks, clapping Bucky on the back. The attention at the small rounded table turns to Bucky briefly, spectators of Steve, who’d been listening to his lively stories and jokes.
“Yeah, it was wild. I thought we’d never get out of there.” Bucky offers, hoping it’ll satiate the table’s desire to see him socialize. It does, or they want to get back to ogling Steve so they laugh and turn their attention back to the wild adventures of Captain America. Bucky takes a sip from his drink.
Bucky watches from across the spacious ballroom floor, as your suitor leans back into his barstool draping his arm across the back of yours, flashing that fucking smile at you again. He’s confident and flirtatious, it’s in the way he signals the bartender over, the way he looks at you when you look away, the smug look that crosses his face when you laugh.
Bucky wants to think that you’re just being polite. He knows that you probably are, because that’s you. At these events, you’re the better half of him, filling in for his introversion by putting yourself out there on his behalf so that at the end of the night the talk is less ‘that Bucky character is so odd’ and more ‘Y/N, his girlfriend is such a sweetheart’.
He doesn’t want to, wishes he could write it off as soon as the thought even comes to mind but you look like you’re having fun. What if you’re enjoying the attention? What if you’re starting to see the appeal of a smooth millionaire compared to your worse for wear boyfriend? He’s nowhere near perfect, and sometimes it’s hard to convince himself that he’s worth it - worth anything. If he lets shit like this get to him, pretty boys in way more expensive suits, he’d start questioning every guy that looks at you for more than two seconds, and you don’t deserve that.
It’s nothing like you, he can’t even imagine it, but it’s burgeoning on the back of his mind. Every second that passes makes him angrier, sadder, more confused, and then he sees him lean in, The room stops as he watches him lean over, and whisper in your ear, with a smirk.
It makes him sick to his stomach, makes his skin crawl, and makes him feel a bit murderous. He stays there for what seems like forever to Bucky, but in reality is nothing more than 5 seconds and when he finally backs away, out of your space where he should’ve always been, you’re… smiling?
Snickering, bringing your hand to your mouth to hide your smile. It makes him explode and he makes the glass in his hand explode. Squeezing too hard, completely out of his mind in anger, he crushes the glass in his flesh hand making what little drink left spill and the shards of the glass that didn’t fall embed themselves in his palm.
The commotion makes heads turn, all attention on Bucky. He’s used to staring but it’s your stare, wide and concerned from across the room that makes him feel under a microscope.
“I’m fine, mind your damn business, all of you.” Bucky murmurs before briskly rushing out of the room.
Right after Bucky disappears you question Steve about what happened, and turn up right outside of his car, where Bucky’s been stewing miserably, with a first aid kit to treat any cuts.
You knock on the passengers’ side window, making Bucky sit up from his reclined position to roll down the window. “What’s up?” he offers, parading as nonchalant, with his heart beating wildly in his chest.
“What’s up?” You mock. Let me in!”
“I’m fine, it was just a little accident, you don’t have to worry about me. I know you’re busy.”
You squint in the dark to see Bucky’s hands, crimson red dripping all down his fingers. ‘FINE? Bucky, you’re bleeding! Open the freaking door.”
He sighs lowly, before unlocking the door and reaching over to close the door. Before your butt can even fully hit the seat, you’re taking his hand over the console as softly as you can.
“Jesus baby, look at you.” He watches you as you examine the damage. Your brows furrowed in concentration, turning his hand oh so gently.
“There are only a few pieces, I can get them if you let me. Just let me, okay?” You ask, without waiting for an answer. The next few minutes are quiet, you working diligently picking out the shards of glass, disinfecting, and wrapping his hand while Bucky watches in awe trying to work through and simultaneously ignore the flurry of thoughts in his head.
Finishing wrapping, you bring his hand to your lips and kiss him there softly. “You scared me.”
“Hm, didn’t think you’d have time to be worried about me.” He lets the snarky comment slip and shuts his eyes tightly when he realizes what he’s done.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothin’, that was stupid.”
“No, what’s that supposed to mean James?” You push.
He winced slightly at the formal name - calling. “Your little boyfriend back there, isn’t he gonna be missing you?”
You let go of his hand and turn to him in your seat. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me.” He hates that he’s acting this way, but he can’t get himself to stop because now he’s thinking about all the things golden boy has that he doesn’t and it makes his chest start to ache.
“Is that why you broke that glass? Is that what that thing was before when you wouldn’t open the door?”
Bucky pretends he doesn’t hear you, starts to fiddle around to look occupied. The air freshener hanging from the mirror, readjusting himself in the chair, ghosting his fingers over the stick shift.
‘I’m talking to you. Is tha-”
“It doesn’t matter. I don’t wanna talk about this shit.”
“Apparently you do. You bring up Jackson as if we-”
“Jackson.” Bucky laughs crudely. “Of course...” Even his name was perfect.
“What is your problem?” You question wildly confused at your boyfriends behavior. He was fine the last time you spoke, and not much had happened since you separated.
“My problem? It’s-” Bucky stops when he realizes he’s searching for words that he can’t say. It’s you, and Jackson but it’s mostly him. But he can’t map where it’s actually you and Jackson and where it’s him, and his insecurities turning in on themselves. “It’s nothing, I’m just in a mood.” He dismisses.
You take a deep breath. “Can you talk to me, please?” You take his dressed hand over the console again, stroking lightly as to calm him. “This isn’t just a mood.” You add, knowingly.
As the softness of your voice settles and he feels the tingly feeling of you caressing his fingers, he calms down and when he looks over at you patiently waiting for him to speak he realizes how much of a dick he is.
You couldn’t cheat on him if you wanted to, your soul was too pure, and for some reason you were in love with his dumbass.
“That Jackson guy, he’s been flirting with you all night.”
“Flirting? He was not flirting with me, I promise you that.”
“He was. I watched him. Flashing that goddamn smile at you and - and you, giggling at all his stupid little rich jokes.”
You snort, “Rich jokes? Jackson?”
“Why do you keep saying his name like that?” Bucky snatches his hand away from you.
“Like what? How am I saying it?”
“Nothing, said I didn’t want to about this.”
“Jackson is married, Buck. He’s not rich and he wasn’t flirting with me.”
“He’s Tony’s friend. That says enough.”
“He’s one of Tony’s interns. We met a while ago at a concert and kind of had the night of our lives and it was funny crossing paths again. He and his husband just got back from their honeymoon.”
You stifle your smirk, “Yes baby, his husband. High school sweethearts so they decided to tie the knot since Jackson has pretty much a secured job when he’s finished with the internship.”
His husband. Bucky flexes his hand hoping he’ll feel a sting of pain to distract himself. He had a fucking husband and you guys are just old friends, just as Bucky suspected. Just like he should’ve known.
“Do you want to talk for real now?” You ask, putting your hand under your chin, with your elbow on the console.
“No it’s stupid now. I just - it’s dumb forget it.”
“It’s not stupid. Nothing you feel is ever stupid.”
“I don’t like seeing him and you together. The way he touched you, the way he talked to you, fucking looked at you. I don’t like it. I’ll never like it, when it’s not me.”
You pull a Bucky forward by the lapel on his suit jacket. “Am I yours?”
Bucky’s eyes search yours, his eyes flittering down to your lips, the ones he fantasizes about, says things that drive him off the edge he constantly stands at with you. “I’m talking to you, am I?”
“You know you are.” His hand wraps around your back.
“Do you know it?” You whisper against his ear, the tickle of your breath making his jeans tighten.
“Just needed a reminder, doll.”
“Maybe I need one too.”
His large hand is pressing harder into your back. “Don’t tempt me.”
“Don’t make me beg.”
“… Get your ass in that backseat.”
240 notes · View notes
summary: When a mission with Sam goes wrong, and you're left bruised and battered, Bucky is there to piece you back together.
pairing: bucky barnes x reader
word count: ~4.3k
warnings: blood and injuries, recovery themes, medical procedures, sam wilson being the best, angst, fluff, happy ending
Bucky stood impatiently in the hangar of the compound, his arms hanging down by his sides, his fingers twitching anxiously. Steve and Natasha stood on either side of him, tracking the motion of the quinjet. Sam had sent an unstable transmission through his ear piece, and Steve was barely able to understand it. The mission you and Sam had been sent had been completed, gaining intel about an illegal weapons deal from a missionary group over the border of Canada.
The transmission that was sent was full of static, and Steve couldn’t understand what Sam was saying. The only thing he could read out was the pure panic in his voice, which had worried Bucky to no end. Millions of thoughts swirled in his head, unable to focus on anything. The three had been watching a movie when the transmissions came in, and as soon as he heard the franticness of Sam’s voice, he was unable to focus on anything else.
“How’re they looking?” Natasha asked, peering over Steve’s shoulder to look at the tablet in his hands. She looked down at the screen, watching the ragged movements of the aircraft.
“They’re approaching, but it might be a rough landing for them.” Bucky’s head whipped towards Steve, his eyes wide and frantic. The sound of the quinjet’s engines filled the air, and Bucky looked up, seeing one of the aircraft’s engines damaged, almost completely blown out. Parts of the quinjet fell onto the landing pad with a loud clunk echoing throughout the hangar, pieces rolling around.
The jet shook side to side as it hovered over the landing pad, and just as it was about to touch the ground, it suddenly jerked off to the side. Steve placed the tablet on a nearby table, watching as the quinjet crashed off to the side. A small explosion erupted at the damaged engine, gasoline dripping onto the white floor. Steve shouted for medical and fire, and Bucky raced forward, Natasha following him. The ramp extended out, and smoke filtered out.
Faint staggering steps were heard as a team of SHIELD agents ran up with fire extinguishers, and Dr. Cho ran up with a gurney, her lab coat flowing as she ran. Then, out of the smoke, Sam staggered out of the damaged quinjet, his face and arms all bloodied and bruised. In his arms laid you, head lolling against his shoulder, suit tainted with blood, face painted with bruises. You were barely conscious, blood pooling out of the cuts on your face and your nose. He wore a solemn look on his face and his eyes met Bucky’s.
Sam stepped forward, placing your limp body on the gurney, your head lolling aimlessly against the soft pillow. Dr. Cho shouted, grabbed the edge of the stretcher, pushing it down the hallway, with the help of her assistants. Sam winced, groaning loudly as he put pressure on his ankle. Steve quickly went to his side, and Bucky seemed to be frozen in place as he watched Dr. Cho raced you to the medical bay.
“What happened? We got the information about the weapons, what happened to Y/n?” Natasha asked, worry etching into her features, and she casted a side glance to Bucky, who kept his gaze on the bay doors.
“I-I don’t know. We were in the control room of the warehouse, there was no one in sight. Y/n downloaded all the files and sent them to Stark, and once we were on our way out, they just came out of nowhere. Ten or fifteen of them, armed with knives and clubs, I tried to usher them away, but they got the hold on her… she tried to take them on, but there were more of them than us.” Sam said, his eyes dropping to the floor. Natasha ushered a medic to their position, and a woman in a lab coat came with a medical kit, tending to Sam’s injuries.
“I was able to launch Redwing out and take out at least seven of them, she was fighting with everything she had. Once I was able to daze them, I grabbed her and ran to the jet and tried flying out of there, but they shot a missile at us. It didn’t do a great deal of damage, but it made the flight rough. I didn’t realize how many injuries she sustained. I-I couldn't… I couldn’t be by her side, and now she’s-”his gaze focused onto the scattered parts of the quinjet that laid on the floor, his hands shaking.
“Hey, this is Y/n we’re talking about. The same woman who smiled when her nose got broken on that mission in Bonn, remember? She’ll come out of this with a smile on her face, you know that.” Natasha said, and Bucky swallowed thickly. “Dr. Cho is with her, you know, the best we have. You did everything you could.” she said, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder.
Steve sighed, crossing his arms as he looked over to his best friend, and he walked over to him. He placed a hand on Bucky’s shoulder. “It’s not his fault,” Steve said in a low voice. Bucky nodded, swallowing and fidgeting with his hands.
“No, I know, I know. I don’t blame him. It’s just… she looked so lifeless when he carried her. And I don’t know-”
“Stop.” Steve said, shooting him a pointed glare. “She will be fine, you know that. She’s survived much worse.” Bucky frantically nodded his head, repeating it in his head like a mantra.
She’ll be fine. She’ll be fine. She will be fine.
Sam winced as the medic pressed an antiseptic wipe against a cut of his face, clenching and unclenching his fist. He caught Steve in the corner of his eye, patting Bucky on the shoulder before the soldier walked down the hall, to the medical bay. Sam took a deep breath in as Steve walked over to him and Natasha.
“He’s pissed at me, isn’t he?” Sam breathed out, looking over at Steve.
“No,” Sam looked skeptical at him. “You know him. He’s overthinking.” The medic rubbed ointment on blisters, cleaned and bandaged open cuts, wrapped his bruised and swollen wrist in a wrap, and spread ointment over purple bruises.
“Take it easy for a few days. No strenuous work or training until the swelling goes down in your wrist.” she said, packing up her medical supplies. “Helen will hopefully be out in a few hours on an update on Agent Y/l/n.” she said with a soft smile, before leaving the hangar. Sam nodded, wincing as he flexed his fingers. Natasha and Steve stood by each other as he stood up, taking one last look at the destroyed quinjet.
The lobby of the medical bay was eerily quiet, save from heavy breathing of Bucky. Sam trudged in, his eyes sagging with exhaustion. Steve and Natasha followed, taking a seat cross from Bucky while Sam sat next to him.
“Thank you for protecting her.” Bucky said, looking over at Sam. The man nodded, gently patting his shoulder. “I… I don’t blame you, by the way.”
Sam smiled, nudging him playfully. “I know, man. You know, she was my friend before she met you, I wasn’t going to leave her. We don’t leave our own behind. Especially not someone like her.”
Bucky smiled and nodded, feeling somewhat better that Sam had been looking out for you.
“How long has it been? Steve asked, breaking the silence that lasted only a few moments.
Bucky glanced at the clock on the wall, biting his lip nervously. “About two hours.” he said, voice thick with emotion. Steve nodded, and Natasha sighed, leaning her head against Steve’s shoulder.
Waiting seemed like an eternity, the only sounds being the ticking from the clock and Bucky’s constant sighing. Bucky anxiously scratched at his fingers, drawing red, irritated lines along the sides of his fingers. Steve had placed his cheek on the top of Natasha’s head, taking her hand in his, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles.
After what felt like hours, Dr. Cho stepped out of the room, her hair that was one in a neat ponytail, now messy with strands poking out. Bucky sat up straight, nudging Sam, who had dozed off.
“How is she?” Sam asked, and Steve and Natasha perked up, the lines of Steve’s jacket embedded on her cheek. She sat up, running her hands through her messy hair, looking over at Dr. Cho.
“She sustained quite a few serious injuries, she had a stab wound in her shoulder which has been stitched and cleaned up, a severe concussion, three cracked ribs, a fractured wrist and a strain in her ankle, but that should be healed in a few days. She has quite a few injuries that I would like to monitor over the next few days, like her wrist and ribs, and the concussion.” Dr. Cho said, sighing as she read over the medical chart in her hand.
“There is a possibility of amnesia with the concussion, but when she was brought in, she was conscious, and knew of her surroundings. But it’s still a possibility. After the cast comes off on her wrist, I would recommend physical therapy. Other than that, I would say she’ll be okay.” Dr. Cho finished, and Bucky felt somewhat relieved.
“How long do you think she’ll be in the medical bay for?” Natasha asked.
“I would like to keep her here for the next few days, monitoring her head and ribs, but if everything looks good, she should be good to be in her own room. Although I am putting her on bed rest for the next two weeks, and after that I would highly recommend that she stays away from training and doing missions.” she said, looking over to Bucky. “You can see her if you’d like. We just put her under sedation, so she’ll be asleep for the rest of the night.” she said softly, and nodded at them before retreating down the hall.
Bucky stood up and made his way into the room, holding his breath when he laid eyes on you. You seemed fragile, laying in a light gown with a thin blanket splayed over your bruised form. Bruises and cuts littered your face and arms, and he could see the braced wrap that covered your left arm, and the white bandage that covered your shoulder.
Bucky sat down in the chair next to your bed, and gathered your uninjured hand in his, pressing a kiss to your knuckles. He held on tightly to your hand while you slept, leaning his body over the edge of the bed. He laid his forehead on your arm, and he closed his eyes.
He didn’t remember drifting off into a dreamless sleep, but the feeling on fingers shakily combing through his hair roused him from his sleep. Bucky lifted his head up groggily, meeting your tired eyes. “Hi, sleepyhead.”
“Hi,” he said, before frowning. He blinked his eyes rapidly, clearing the sleepiness from his eyes. You gave him a tired smile, and he shot up faster than you’d ever seen, hovering over you, unsure of what to do. “You’re awake! Oh, god you’re awake… do you need anything? Does anything hurt? Do I need to get Dr. Cho? Oh, I should tell Sam-”
“N-no, I’m fine.” you whispered, closing your eyes. “Just calm down a bit, okay?” you giggled, grabbing his hand with your uninjured hand. You tugged, and Bucky sat down, bringing the chair as close as he could to your bedside.
“How are you feeling?” Bucky asked, and you turned your head to look at him.
“A little sore, but okay. My head hurts a little.” Bucky nodded, holding your hand in his, squeezing lightly. The door squeaked open, and Bucky turned around to see Sam poke his head in, a small stuffed falcon in his hand.
“Looks like you have a visitor.” Bucky whispered, and Sam stepped into the room, slowly making his way over to the other side of your bed. You smiled up at him as he took a seat next to your bed.
“Hi, Sammy.” you said, and Sam smiled, carefully taking your injured hand in his. You saw his eyes fill with tears, and he struggled to say something. You heard Bucky get up and walk to the doorway, giving the two of you privacy.
“Hey, missy.” he said in a tight voice. He cleared his throat, bringing the plush animal up off his lap, onto the bed. You smiled at him, gently encasing his hand with yours. “I’m so sorry-”
“Sammy, stop.” you said, urging him to look up at you. “It’s not your fault, okay? I don’t blame you, so please don’t put this on yourself. You were the one that grabbed me so we could escape. You triaged me the best you could, and survived because of you.” he looked at you, and you squeezed his hand gently. “It’s not your fault, okay?”
Sam nodded, leaning forward, gingerly hugging your frail body. You hugged him back, pressing your face into his shoulder. He held the back of your head and kissed your temple before pulling back. He wiped his face and held the stuffed falcon in his hands.
“For me?” you asked with a smile, and Sam laughed lightly, nodding his head. He handed you the stuffed toy, and you held it gingerly in your hand, fingers dancing over the brown wings and black beaded eyes.
“I’m happy that you’re okay, missy. I don’t know what I would do if I lost you.” Sam said, taking your hand and pressing a kiss to the back of your hand.
You hugged the stuffed toy close to your chest, and you urged Sam to come closer. With all the strength you had, you leaned forward and tenderly kissed him on the cheek. You smiled at him and looked at your falcon again, toying with the fluffy feathers.
“I’m glad you’re okay too, Sammy. But if I catch you blaming yourself, I will be very upset with you, you hear me? Very upset.” you said, looking at him with the best stern face you could muster. But a tired smile broke through your faux stern expression.
“Yes, ma’am.” Sam saluted you. He could see exhaustion evident in your eyes, and he leaned forward, tucking the blanket around you. “Get some rest.” he whispered, and you nodded, relaxing into the pillows as sleep overtook you.
As Dr. Cho promised, you were released from the medical bay within the next few days, with two bottles of pain medication and plenty of wraps and braces to change. She had offered to place your braced wrist in a sling, noticing how you held it close to your chest, and you obliged. Bucky walked next to you, one hand on your elbow, the other on the small of your back, gently guiding you to the residential wing of the compound.
“You okay?” Bucky asked, noticing how you were biting your lip. You nodded, stretching out your sore ankle. You took a deep breath in, leaning into his side to take the sudden pressure off your ankle. “You know, I could always just carry you.” You chuckled, leaning your cheek onto his shoulder.
“I know, but my legs are so stiff from laying down all week. It’s just a little sore.” you said, continuing your trek from the medbay to your shared room. You knew doing the little things in your daily routine were going to be a little rough at first, but you could get through it. After all, there were worse injuries you had come out of.
Bucky opened the door and held it open, and you walked through, making a line for the comfy bed you craved, rather than the lumpy medical bed you had been lying on all week. Sitting down on the edge of the bed, you exhaled deeply, closing your eyes.
Bucky closed the curtains, seeing as it was almost completely dark outside, and he quickly moved around the room, turning the lights on. He gently closed the door, kicking off his shoes before making his way back to you, kneeling down to your eye level. You opened your eyes, softly smiling at you, and Bucky leaned forward, kissing your forehead.
“Why don’t I get you into a bath and some fresh clothes, and then settle down for the night, hm? That sound okay?” Bucky asked gently, tucking your hair behind your ear. You nodded, allowing him to help you up, guiding you to the bathroom. He sat you on the closed toilet seat and leaned over the edge of the tub, turning on the warm water.
Turning back around to you, Bucky leaned down and carefully removed your clothes, taking the sling off your arm with care, and placing the cover that Dr. Cho had given you hours ago. You frowned, turning your hand around.
“It looks like a clear oven mitt.” you said, and Bucky chuckled, sealing it at your elbow. He turned off the water and grabbed your hand, helping you ease into the tub. You closed your eyes, feeling the warm water soothe your bruised body.
“It’s not too hot, is it?” Bucky asked, and you shook your head.
“It feels nice.” you said. Bucky smiled and sat down on the edge of the tub. He leaned over and grabbed a cup, dipping it into the water. He watched it fill to the brim, and shielded your eyes with his hand, pouring the water down your hair. He poured a quarter-sized amount of shampoo in his palm and rubbed his fingers together, massaging your scalp. Your eyes fluttered shut, Bucky’s fingers working magic against your head.
Bucky rinsed out your hair, clearing out the suds of shampoo with water, and he repeated the same motion again, this time with your conditioner. While he let the conditioner sit in your hair, he grabbed the loofa from the wall and gently picked up your arm, tenderly moving the sponge up and down your arm.
You watched him, smiling when you saw the concentration in his furrowed brows. Hegently dipped your arm back into the water, and cupped the backs of your knees, washing them as well. “You treat me too good.” you whispered.
Bucky looked up at you, and he shook his head. “You deserve every bit of this treatment, sweetheart. All the time.” Bucky smiled at you as he rinsed out your hair. He unplugged the tub, and slowly the water drained out of the tub. He grabbed a towel and helped you up, and he wrapped you in the towel, leading you out of the bathroom.
Rummaging through drawers, he pulled out an old t-shirt that he had seen you wear countless times, and a soft pair of shorts, helping you into them. Bucky carefully pulled off the cover of your brace and placed it on the desk, grabbing one of the bottles of pain medication Dr. Cho had prescribed you.
Bucky placed the small white pill in the palm of your hand, and as you threw it back in your mouth, he brought a glass of water to your lips. Squeezing your eyes shut, you swallowed the pill back with water, wincing at the feel of the medicine against your tongue.
“Let’s get you to bed, yeah?” Bucky murmured, and you nodded. You felt an ounce of guilt pass through you, and you looked up at him. Bucky caught your eyes as you laid down back against the soft sheets. “You okay, baby?”
You nodded. “You don’t have to do any of this for me,” Bucky sat down on the edge of the bed, leaning down to place a soft kiss on your lips.
“Yes, I do. I love doing this, okay? You’re not burdening me, or taking up any of my time. I would rather wait months and see you get better than not help you, and watch you suffer silently. I love you, honey. And I’m willing to wait however long it takes for you to get better. I’m with you through it all. Okay?” Bucky said, tenderly cradling your face in his hands.
“Okay,” you whispered, and you felt the drowsiness of the pain medication start to kick in. Bucky draped the sheets over your body, and he quickly made his way across to his side, turning off the lights before crawling in the bed with you.
“We’re gonna get through this together, okay? Together.” Bucky whispered as he pulled you into his arms, so that your head was resting on top of his chest. You nodded before closing your eyes, letting yourself fall into a dreamless sleep.
Over the course of the next couple of weeks, Bucky stayed true to his word, staying by your side through everything.
When you would wake up, tears streaming down your face from the sudden pain in your arm, Bucky would be there, wiping away your tears, pressing a cool ice pack to your fractured wrist. When you had trouble cutting up your dinner, feeling everyone’s concerned eyes on you, Bucky would help you without hesitation. Or when it was time for your physical therapy appointment, he was there next to you, a comforting hand on your shoulder, when you tensed up during your hand stretches.
But most of all, he was there when you felt your walls crumble, feeling useless and helpless. Not being able to do the smallest task because of your hand, Bucky was there to wipe your tears away, to hold and comfort you, to press soft and loving kisses to your forehead and cheeks.
Sam always did his best to cheer you up, and sometimes it worked. Him intimidating one of the characters from the movies you’d watch, activating Redwing and having him follow Bucky around always brought a smile to your face. And most of all, when he noticed you were in an off-mood, and Bucky was out with Steve on a briefing meeting with Tony, he made you his famous beignets, coated with powdered sugar. He showed them to you, and your mood instantly lightened up.
One morning, on a rare occasion, you awoke before Bucky. You looked over at his sleeping form, and pressed a light kiss to his cheek before padding down the hall, and into the kitchen. Pushing yourself on the balls of your feet, you reached and grabbed Bucky’s mug, one that was grey with a quote from his favorite book, The Hobbit. You filled the filter with grounds and brewed coffee for him, while rummaging through the fridge for a muffin.
You knew, on the occasion, that Bucky loved quiet mornings, and he would usually be drinking his coffee with a muffin to go with it. So, you looked through the fridge before your eyes landed on the blueberry muffin he had bought a week earlier.
You pulled it out and closed the door, moving your attention back to the coffee that was almost ready. Studying for a moment, you looked down at your arm that was still in a sling, and came to a decision. Grabbing the mug with your free hand, you held the muffin by the wrapper in your injured hand’s hold, you held onto the pastry in a vice-like grip, fear of dropping it.
You made your way back to your room, feeling your hand start to cramp up from holding the muffin. You pushed open the door with your foot, and placed it on the desk near the door, looking up to see Bucky still asleep. You placed the muffin next to the mug, stretching out your hand.
The bedsheets rustled, and Bucky turned on his back, a hand coming up to wipe his face. Smiling to yourself, you grabbed the handle of the mug and walked over to his side, and you placed the mug on his nightstand, going back to the muffin.
“Good morning, sleepyhead.” you whispered, leaning down to press a kiss on his forehead as he blinked his eyes open. Bucky smiled tiredly at you and sat up, stretching his arms above his head.
“Morning, doll,” his voice came out rough. He leaned forward and pressed a sleepy kiss to your jaw, nudging his nose into your cheek.
“I made you coffee.” you said, grabbing the mug shakily. Bucky grasped the handle and smiled at you, taking a sip of the dark coffee. “And I brought you a muffin.” You smiled at him.
“Thank you, sweetheart.” Bucky said, placing the mug back on the nightstand. He pulled you into his lap, arms circling around your lower back. “What’s all this for?” he asked, tilting his head. You shrugged, playing with the lapels of his Henley that he wore, fingers circling around the buttons.
“I dunno… I just wanted to do something nice for you. Just as a thank you for the last few months, being patient with me.” you said, ducking your head in embarrassment. Bucky curled his finger and hooked it under your chin, gently bringing you to meet his eye.
“You don’t have to make me coffee, or bring me pastries to thank me. Being here with you, being able to hold you at night, and to sit next to you at dinner, or having you in my lap when we’re watching a movie, that’s enough for me. You’re enough for me.” Bucky said, and you felt tears well in your eyes. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.” you whispered, pressing your lips to his. Bucky cradled the back of your head as your lips molded against each other, fitting like a puzzle piece. Bucky pulled away, keeping you firmly in his lap as he reached for the muffin, tearing off a piece and offering it to you. You smiled and took it, biting into the soft pastry.
Looking at Bucky as he ate his muffin and drank his coffee, you felt an undying devotion to him, knowing that through the thick and thin of life, he would be there through it all. Through the happy moments to the rough patches, you had him. And that was more than enough for you.
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ooh ohh!! may you please write a blurb about Plum being a complete mommy's girl and Bucky loving Reader and Plum's connection, but also wishing he had that with Plum!! can be slightly angsty but mostly fluff plz 🥺
AWH I ALWAYS IMAGINED PLUM BEING A DADDY’S GIRL 🥺 Plum is aged up a bit in this
“I don’t think she likes me very much,” Bucky sulked silently. He was watching you rock her back and forth in her arms as she slept.
“What would make you say that?” You frown at his words, “You’re her dad. She adores you, Buck,”
“But she doesn’t let me hold her when she cries, she doesn’t want me to help her when she’s sick. Only you, she won’t let me read her her favorite story. What’s wrong with me?”
“Baby,” you move Plum into his arms and she murmurs softly in her sleep, cuddling right into him “There are just some things mama does better. Ever notice notice how she doesn’t let me cut her pancakes? Or let me brush her teeth? She only likes it when you’re the one singing and dancing with her to her favorite kidz bop cd,”
“I don’t know… I just expected her to be a papa’s girl,” Bucky kisses the forehead of his gorgeous daughter, “I just don’t like it when she cries because of me,”
“She’s a mama and papa’s girl, Buck,” you run your hand over his head, “She cries because she’s an emotional character but we both handle it well. She loves you no matter what,”
Bucky wanted to believe your words but he’s seen how Plum is with you and he just feels it’s not like that with him. He’s glad you and her are the way that you two are, he just feels like he’s missing out sometimes.
“I feel like I’m a terrible dad somehow,” he huffed, not wanting tears to come to his eyes. Bucky always wanted to make sure he was the best dad he could be and he wasn’t feeling that, “I’ll be better. I just gotta find out what I’m doing wrong”
He was truly convinced something was wrong with his parenting, when he doesn’t realize your daughter adores him to the ends of the universe and back.
“She’s another you,” Bucky stared down at Plum and adores the way her brown cheeks shine and the way her mouth slightly hangs open as she sleeps, “I want to be the best dad I can for her. M-maybe she doesn’t have a strong connection with me because I-I don’t look like her,”
“Oh please,” you whisper yell and slap his shoulder, “You think she cares about that? She doesn’t know either. She knows you’re her dad! And nothing is gonna change that. I just happened to be the one carrying her for a good nine months so the connection is internal. My body created housed a soul. Connections are always different between parents,”
You miss his cheeks and you can tell your words mean something to him and helps relieve his stress for a minute.
“Doesn’t mean she doesn’t love you. Doesn’t mean she’s not a papa’s girl. She’s our baby Bucky she’s gonna act different for each of us. That’s just the facts,”
“You’re right,” he kissed Plum’s head one more time and looks at you. He’s so blessed to have you two.
“But watch, I’m gonna win her heart fully and she’s gonna be team dad!,”
“One thing you need to realize is you already won her heart, baby”
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Barnes' miscommunication | Bucky Barnes x Avenger!reader
Summary: Bucky was an idiot, and he tend to push away things he loved, and that included you. When he hurt you, he didn’t realise his apology would be too late. He didn’t know about your past with hydra, which made the situation, worse.
W/c: 5.2k (holy shit that's alot)
Warning(s): ANGST, weapons, harm (not on you), reader abilities, hydra, swearing!
A/N: A lot to write, I couldn’t find a good way to summarise this fic… you’ll just have to read it. There are -- read more-breaks for the story because it is so long.
Any likes, comments and reblogs are always appreciated! Enjoy <33
You were never one to talk; even before you were kidnapped by Hydra, you still didn't really speak. You were quiet and reserved; being an ex-hydra assassin just solidified your personality. There was a lot to know about you, but you never really shared anything about yourself when it came to it. Everyone knew you as Y/n Stark, 'the daughter of Tony and Pepper Stark' and the girl kidnapped when she was five, found by the avengers later in life.
You worked through a lot of things. The therapy Tony and Pepper signed you into helped with the nightmares, but that was about it. But even still, you weren't entirely there; if people didn't know you, your first impression was always coming off as rude and inconsiderate. And you supposed that after all your years working for Hydra, you probably were. You were very much closed off until you met Bucky Barnes.
Bucky Barnes, an ex-hydra assassin, was welcomed into the team just over a year and a half ago. Your dad agreed to the idea because he thought it might be nice for you to have someone else. One who had something in common with you other, both Natasha and Wanda.
Meeting Bucky was all to be expected; you both got along well, but never once had you shared something about your personal life. You were closed off, and although you and Bucky were civil. He, too, was the same. It was like two peas in a pod.
Over time, it became a love-hate relationship; you'd try your best to be on good terms with Bucky, but over time it felt like he had something against you. You and Bucky were at constant war with each other, and you didn't know what you did for him to hate you so much, or so you thought. You thought that maybe if you tried to tell him that you were an ex-hydra yourself, that may be the pair of you could bond a bit more. But your attempts to do so turned out in failure.
A simple smile would turn into Bucky turning his head away. A good morning, Bucky would walk away. There were definitely good days where he would talk to you, but it wouldn't last long. You guys just didn't really click anymore, and it had been over a year and a half since he had arrived.
Then, not too long ago, Bucky started playing pranks around the compound with Sam. It was their thing. One day when you were about to go on a mission with Nat and Steve, Bucky had accidentally hidden all of your mission weapons, thinking they were Nat's. So you, too, joined in on the fun; two could play at that game, Ex-hydra assassin vs Ex-hydra assassin.
Slowly, you began pranking him back, shaving cream in his boots, salt in his tea or replacing his daggers with dummy knives, just to name a few.
Bucky knew it was you, and he was finding this game pretty fun. There was never a malicious intent behind the minor pranks the both of you played on each other. This quickly became your thing with him and was the reason you two became close again. Spending more time together than usual, you'd spend nights watching films with him, playing board games or even chatting until the earlier hours of the morning. He'd find it weird that you'd be the only one up sometimes, but he never questions it.
It was odd; you were slowly but surely falling in love with Bucky Barnes. You didn't know why or how it happened, but that love for him was there. He made you feel something you had been missing for most of your life.
Bucky, too developed a love for you. He, too, didn't know where it began or how it happened, but he knew that after all his years of not having anyone, he wanted you. Now I suppose when you put two and two together, it's not hard to know that you and Bucky had a thing for each other; the whole team knew it. Your dad knew it too. However, it never went anywhere; You were just as awkward as each other.
Leading to a few nights ago.
There were three hydra missions scheduled in the week; you and Bucky had been assigned to one of the three. When he came back from his mission that day, he was drained and distraught. You went to welcome him home, but he walked right past you and up to his room.
Steve said something about Bucky seeing where they had tortured him for decades, the memories had got to him, and you understood. Steve thought you might be the best to comfort him, but Bucky still had no idea that you had worked for Hydra before, but you never shy away from the fact that you did. If someone asked, you would tell them. Which still confuses you, the fact that it never came up over the year you've known him. You thought surely someone would say something to him if you hadn't.
The only genuine person who ever understood your pain was Wanda. Both you and she were hydra experiments at the same time. You, her and Pietro. Escaping together because of Ultron, and that's how your dad found you. When Pietro died, it was like you were losing a brother. So you stuck by Wanda; she promised to protect you as you would in return. She was the only one to actually understand what you were going through.
Before the hydra mission, he promised that he'd have dinner with you. Something the pair of you had been doing for quite a while now. So here you were, keeping that promise. You stood outside Bucky's door, softly knocking. You had his dinner that you made in your hand, waiting for him to answer. When Bucky didn't answer, you carefully opened the door just a tiny bit to see him sitting at the end of his bed, gripping the sheets tight in his hand.
His little run-in at the Hydra base triggered something in him. It got under his skin, and he was furious. But you knew that; you sensed it as soon as you walked in the door, and little did he know, you could see what had happened. A soft frown appeared on your face as you walked closer, sitting just a bit away from him at the edge of his bed. "Buck? I made dinner," You called; he didn't answer, just sat there breathing heavily.
"Y/n go away," he warned.
Head tilted, you weren't having any of it. Out of anyone besides Wanda, you knew just how bad Hydra could get, and you didn't want him to be alone. "Bucky, I'm not going anywhere, you promised me dinner, and I made it especially for you." You softly spoke, taking a seat next to him.
He turned to you, looking you up and down. Laying a supporting hand on his back, you leaned down a bit to see his face. "You need someone; Steve told me what happened, and he thought I may be the best to--" you couldn't even finish your sentence before he snapped.
"Best to what, y/n? Understand me? NON of you understand me…" he growled. Sitting back a bit, you were stunned; you didn't know where this was coming from. "Bucky… I do understand. I've been trying to tell you for so long that I was-"
"NO y/n, you don't understand anything, you don't understand me, nobody does!" He yelled at you. You weren't scared; you were sad. You had never done anything for him to be this way to you, yet, here he was.
It hurt you to see him like this. "Bucky, please… I just."
"Get out! GET OUT OF MY ROOM; I hate you." Bucky turned, the words seething through his teeth. Your bottom lip quivered as you stood looking directly at him.
"You don't mean that.."
"I really thought that we were okay… I thought that-"
Bucky stood in front of you, your head looking up at him, "I SAID GET OUT Y/N." he pointed to the door.
A tear shed your face, setting the food down on the bed. You held in your whimpers, "W-well, at least eat. I made it just for you." You almost whispered to him. He watched as you walked away; he didn't realise what he had done. Shutting the door on the way out, you cried back to your quarters. Wanda caught you just in time, that sisterly sense she had when you were down. She sat with you all night while you told her what Bucky had said. You felt so stupid.
In the morning,
Bucky had awoken on his floor; getting up, he noticed the food sitting on his bed. Bucky couldn't remember much last night, only that he came home from the mission, and that was about it. He smiled upon seeing the wrapped food; you had written a note on it. The message you had stuck on it before you walked into his room last night because you thought he may have been in the showers.
"Because I know you like sushi, enjoy! :)"
Slipping on a shirt, Bucky collected the plate of food in his arm with a big smile on his face. Walking out and down the hall to your room, just as he was about to knock on the door. Wanda came storming down from the corridor.
"You son of a bitch!", she yelled slapping Bucky's face. The sushi you made, Bucky slipped from his hands, falling onto the floor in between Wanda and him. His mouth agape, he looked stunned. "If you are looking for Y/n, she's gone on her mission." she huffed out. Wanda gave him a nasty look before walking off. He turned quickly, running off to find Wanda. "Wanda? Wanda-" he stopped when he saw her in the kitchen.
"What do you want, Barnes!"
“I want to understand why you slapped me… What did I do? d-did something happen last night?" he asked. Wanda snapped her head in his direction, "Did you do something? Of course, you did!" She yelled. Bucky came closer to her, "I did? I seriously don't remember." he raised his hands up in defence. "I don't…" he hesitantly repeated.
"Well, this might help you!" Wanda brought her hands up, filling Bucky's mind with the memories of last night. It only took a few seconds for Bucky to fall onto his ass. He was speechless; he put his head into his hands. Wanda kneeled down, "What has she ever done to you?" she questions.
"Nothing Wanda… nothing… I don't even remember anything past coming home." He sighed. "I don't give a shit if you don't remember. Make it up to y/n! She loves you, for God sake, and this is how you treat her!" Wanda ranted mindlessly. "S-she loves me?" Bucky looked up and questioned.
Wanda gave him a shit-eating look, "Of course she loves you; everyone knows this!" She sighed, getting up. His face brightened, "I love her too, Wanda!" He spoke. He hadn't said this to anyone until this very moment, but he did love you. This was the reason; it was his fault for your rocky relationship with him. He was scared to love you, thinking you wouldn't love him in return.
Wanda turned around, shocked, "Then why tell the girl you love that you hated her." Bucky didn't know; he tried so hard to remember, "I got worked up over the mission yesterday, I set myself on auto-pilot. I'll make it up to her, I promise." He got up, trying to think about how to make it up to you.
"Bucky. I'm not in a forgiving mood right now. But just know, she has been through a lot, and you're the only one in this building which still doesn't know that. The best thing you can do is listen to her." She spoke before angrily taking her bowl of grapes with her out into the living room where Vision was.
Before the mission,
"Alright, it is a short but stealthy mission. Y/n, Steve, Nat and Clint, you'll be navigating this one." Fury spoke.
"There is intel that there could be valuable information on Hydra hard drives. We need you to extract them and burn any remaining evidence." He spoke again, everyone agreed, looking through the files. Nat had rested a firm hand on yours, "are you sure you're up for this?" She asked. You simply smiled, confirming her question with a nod.
Everyone in the room with you knew your history with Hydra; that's how you became an esteemed Avenger. Telling everyone your story led to you using your skills to help people around the world. It wasn't uncommon for them to occasionally ask if you were okay or wanted to stay behind if it ever came to a hydra mission.
Now hours later, you were on your way back to the compound. Pretty much feeling like shit. You were numb, and there was no energy left in you. Of course, you didn't let your team see it, but you were exhausted. You just wanted to take a nice shower, eat and sleep for days.
The quinjet landed, and everyone was dis-embarking the jet.
Being the last one out, you slowly made your way into the compound. Not wanting to see anyone, you made yourself a tiny portal to your room that you walked through; you couldn't care. You stood in the middle of your room, not knowing what to do with yourself. Sliding slowly against the end of your bed. Still, with your daggers and weapons attached to your mission suit. You curled up, hiding your face into your knees.
Bucky had run out from his room as soon as he heard the quinjet landing. He came into the bay, looking around for you, but all he could see was Steve, Nat and Clint. Steve smiled upon seeing his best friend, "Hey Jerk, how was your day?" Steve asked, giving him a pat on the shoulder.
"Uh… not great… where's y/n?" Bucky asked, running his hand through his hair. Nat, Clint and Steve all turned their head to look at each other before looking at Bucky. "In her room, catching an early night." Steve smiled, "Steve… I screwed up!" Bucky panicked.
Clint and Nat were putting away their things while Steve stayed with Bucky. "Buck… I don't know what to say." Steve lightly spoke. "Give y/n some time. But not today." Nat spoke before walking out the doors with Clint. Bucky looked back at Steve, "What's with everyone telling me not to bother her today? Wanda, Sam… even Tony has said the same thing."
"This mission was draining for her," Steve advised his friend before giving him another reassuring pat on the back. "If you really want to know, without bother y/n. Just ask Tony. I'm sure he'll tell you." Steve smiled, walking off.
Tony was focused on his tech while Bruce was working at his computer, Bucky had walked in, and without looking up, Tony spoke. "What did you do to my daughter, Barnes?" He questioned. Bucky stood there feeling guilty. "I'm sorry, Tony… I really am. The mission got to me, and I took it out on her." Tony looked up from his laptop, "have you apologised to her?" Bucky shook his head. "Good. Like I said earlier, let her cool down." He spoke before going back to working on his tech.
Bucky stood there trying to say something, "Is there something else, Barnes?"
"That's what I wanted to ask you about." this made Tony sigh. A hand running down his chin, Tony gives Bruce a look. Walking over, he patted the surface of Bucky's back, "Come… sit", he spoke, taking a seat at one of the lab tables. "By what she tells me, you don't know that she was an ex-hydra assassin, correct?" Bucky's face was confused. He was taken aback. "Well, I'm taking that as a yes."
"You know I'm surprised that you've never come across her..." Tony continued. Bucky was wide-eyed; oh, he knew he was such an idiot. "If my time calculation is right, you would've been there the same time as her." looking directly at Bucky, "You're going to have to ask her yourself about her past. Seeing as I know about last night and the fact that you love my daughter." he let out a slight smirk. "I advise that you do one hell of a job to make sure she knows you love her." He spoke. Bucky nodded, and there Tony was, telling you bits of your story.
"I've spent almost two years not knowing she was a part of Hydra? God, I'm so stupid." he sighed, "Tony, I really am sorry." Bucky looked at him. "Don't tell me that; tell her that, bud."
He thought back to all of the times you were with him, all the times you tried to tell him. So when you said you understood him, you really were telling him the truth. Although he couldn't remember the conversation between you two last night, he knew from what Wanda had shown him.
Getting into the shower, you stood underneath the running water for quite a while.
Your thoughts floating in your head, this mission had torn you to pieces, physically and mentally. It had drained you, and all you needed was to regain your health. Cleaning yourself off and washing your hair, you spent a few minutes more under the running water. Thinking about the mission and about Bucky. Bucky was on your mind; you confided in him. He was like your best friend, so you didn't know how to feel when he did this. You tried the entire night to understand his feelings, but you weren't genuinely processing it.
Bucky was walking back to the main quarters when he heard your angered scream, "BUCKY FUCKING BARNES," looking at yourself in the mirrors. Your hair was a mix of pink and green. You furiously went into your showering, grabbing the shampoo and conditioner bottle, checking the contents; it was dye.
Bucky ran up the stairs, coming out into the halls where Sam was standing just a bit away from your room. Then it clicked; Sam turned to Bucky, "I thought you took it out of her shower." Bucky mentally face-palmed himself. "I forgot! I forgot!" Nat and Wanda were coming out of their rooms; they looked at each other with an 'oh fuck look'. Bucky turned to Wanda and Nat, who looked like they were going to kill him. "I'm sorry!" He panicked.
You were a mix of furious and sad; you paced around your room with tears streaming uncontrollably down your face. You dried your hair, slipping into a comfy jumper, some tights, and your combat boots. You pulled the hood over your head, grabbing your daggers. All you saw was red. Today all you needed was a nice shower, to have some food, put your mission gear away and then head to bed. But this was it, that was the cherry on top; you let the emotions run free.
You came out of your room to see Wanda, Nat, Sam, Clint and Vision standing there. "Where's Barnes!" You yelled at them. "H-here." Bucky came out from the staircase; your eyes snapped in his direction. Sam stood in front of your path, "y/n… y/n it was me. I'm-" you were still fuming; you had used your abilities to throw him out of your path. Clint came in sight, and you did the same thing to him.
Storming towards Bucky, your dagger was in your hand. Bucky stood there, not really know what to do. You kicked his chest in with much force that he went flying onto the ground. Groaning, you stalked closers, kneeling onto his chest, and he let you. You pulled the dagger to his throat. When you aggressively took the hoodie off to reveal your face, he could see you were crying. "You think this is fucking funny, Barnes?" You yelled at him, "I have done nothing but be nice to you!" You continued yelling at him.
Nat came in from behind you, but Bucky shook his head, "It's okay, Nat, let her." He groaned as you pushed into his chest. Still, with a dagger to his throat, he looked into your eyes as your cried. "I… I get it… I get that you hate me! I get it!" You cried out in anger. Everyone didn't really know what to do or how to react. They all just stood there watching.
"Y/n… please sweet. You're hurting him." Wanda spoke, your face dropped a bit, turning to Wanda, your eyes darkened, you couldn't get it out of your head. She saw it; she saw this look once before. This just made you a hundred times more dangerous, and you knew she wouldn't get in your way.
Turning back to Barnes, he was looking at you. "A-all I wanted was to come home, have a fucking shower and go to sleep." Your anger is apparent to him. The angrier you got, your hair began to strip of pink and green, turning into a jet black colour.
"I've called Tony," Clint reassured.
Bucky lifted his hand, he tried to caress your face, but you quickly swatted it away, "y/n… I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you…" he furrowed his brows, trying to bring back the y/n he loved. Your whimpers heard from him, "what did I do! What did I do for you not to like me." You yelled into his face. "I don't hate you Y/n… I promise you, I lo-" he stopped when you pushed the dagger further into his neck. You were too angry to let him speak; you couldn't.
Steve and Tony running up the stairs, Bucky briefly looked at Steve.
A black glow emitting from your other hand, and your eyes darkened more. Tony looked at Wanda and nodded. With a flick of her hands, she sent the dagger flying from your hands. Looking at Wanda, your eyes widened. Before you could do anything else, you were pulled off Bucky by the waist. "Hey… hey honey." You looked back to see your dad, a frown set upon your face as you dropped your hands; you gave in once you saw your dad.
Steve was helping Bucky up while everyone just stood there as you cried into your dad's arms, whimpering into his chest. He brought you into a tight hug caressing your back. Bruce came from behind, sedating you with an injection. Your eyed dilated slightly as you looked at your dad with pleas before falling limp into his arms.
Everyone watched, your hair turning back into its original colour. Bucky felt guilty, nor did he know that you had any abilities. Tony looks at Bucky shaking his head in disappointment before picking you up, carrying your sleeping body back to your room. "Friday, get Pepper over here," Tony spoke. "Right away, Tony."
"So everyone saw that?" Sam asked, "Y/n has powers?"
"Yes, she does, and it's none of your business." Wanda shook her head, walking off with Nat. Bucky was catching his breath as Steve held onto him. "I fucked up, Steve… I really did." He felt so bad. Steve looked at him with sympathy. "C'mon, Bud, let's get you back to your room. We can discuss this tomorrow." He spoke. Bucky looked at his best friend, "But I need her to know that I'm sorry… Steve, I need to tell her that I love her." He was almost in tears. "And you will tomorrow. The dose Bruce gave her will last until morning." Steve said.
Bucky sighed, nodding in defeat as he made his way to his bed. "Just trying and get some sleep, Buck." Steve closed the door behind him. Bucky laid on his bed, looking up at the ceiling all night, trying to think of how to tell you he was sorry.
"They were eventually going to find out how bad she could get..." Tony spoke, running his hand down his face, "I told you and Fury not to put her on that mission, Tony." Pepper quietly yelled at him. They both turned your way, watching as you slept softly under your sheets. "She said she was okay; I trust her, Pep. Who am I if I am not to trust our own daughter's words?" Tony sighed. Pepper's arms folded, she took a seat right next to you, caressing the hair out of your face. "Is Bucky okay?" Pepper asked; Tony rolled his eyes. "He's okay; Steve said he keeps going on about apologising."
"Are you going to let him apologise?" Pepper asked Tony.
"Mh… I'm thinking about it."
"Yes, okay… I'm not one to stop metal arm from apologising." Tony replied.
"Don't call him that," Pepper spoke, giving your forehead a kiss. "Okay... sorry," he whined before doing the same, pulling your duvets up to keep you warm…
Groaning, your eyes flutter open. You didn't move; you just stared at the ceiling. You remembered everything last night, and you felt guilty for what you had done to Bucky. Laying amongst your pillows, you continued to stare at the ceiling.
It was maybe about 45 minutes later when a soft knock on your door lured you from your daze. Bucky knocking on the door didn't bother you. You just continued your stare into the void.
On the outside of the door were Bucky and Tony. Tony stared at Bucky, whispering. "Go in, Manchurian Candidate. We don't have all day." Tony spoke, opening the door, pushing Bucky in before closing the door behind him. You were awake and unbothered by his presence.
He walked towards your bed, taking a seat next to you. "I made you your favourite." He lightly smiled; you softly turned your head to look at him then to the plate of food. Bucky indeed made your favourite food, but you had no words. You didn't say anything but turned back to stare at the ceiling. Bucky placed the plate on your bedside table. Lying right next to you, he sighed.
"Y/n… I'm really sorry about last night and the night before. It wasn't my intention to hurt you. I just wasn't in the right headspace, and I took it out on you" He quietly spoke. "I'm really sorry..."
"I know there have been multiple times you've tried to tell me that you were kidnapped by Hydra… and I'm sorry it took me until now to know." He turned to you as you tensed. He was exploring your features, the ones he had grown to love since the day he first met you.
"And I-" Bucky went to speak, but you cut him off, "Do you hate me?" You quietly asked, still with your eyes to the ceiling. Bucky shook his head, "I could never hate you y/n." "Then why say it?" You asked him again. "Because I was an idiot. I was angry, but I didn't mean any of it. I was so caught up in the mission that I took it out on you." he looked down at his hands.
"It was like I lost myself when I got back to the compound. But that is no excuse for what I did to you, and for that, I will spend however long it takes to make it up to you." You turned to look at him, and he was already looking at you. Sympathy in his eyes, you knew he was genuinely sorry.
"I never meant to hurt you last night, Buck. I'm really sorry, I feel horrible." He smiled lightly at you, "You don't need to be sorry. I understand how you felt, and I'm an idiot. I never wanted to hurt you."
And like any other conversation of yours, the pair of you started fighting again.
"But you did-"
"I know I did-"
"What did I do, Bucky? Where did I go wrong?"
"Nowhere… you didn't do anything."
"But then why-" you were thinking out loud, and you didn't mean to; the words were just slipping out.
"Because I love you, okay? I love you y/n! And I am so angry with myself that waited this long to tell-"
"I love you too..." You cut in. "I know you do," you spoke again.
"You know?" Bucky questioned. You nodded, "I have been able to read your mind since the day you step foot inside this compound, Bucky. I've loved you even before you started liking me." you sent him a small smile.
He went to speak but quickly shut his mouth, taking the advice that Tony gave him about listening to you. "And when you told me you hated me, I couldn't read your mind. I couldn't tell myself that you were lying and that you said it out of the moment." A tear fell down your face. Bucky rested his hand on your cheek, lightly caressing away the tears. "I've spent months trying to tell you so you knew you could talk to me. Because I understood. I wanted you to know that we had something in common. I wanted you to know that I loved you. But you never gave me that chance."
"All the times you would turn away from me, or ignore me or even go as far as to telling the team that you didn't want to go on missions with me."
"I tried because I thought you hated me…. Until that day, when you came home, and I had made you tacos. That was the first time I heard your mind again; I had heard you say that you loved me."
Bucky smiled; he remembered that day. Thinking back to it now, he knew he never said it, but he felt it because it was true. "So you knew what I've been thinking this whole time?" He quietly asked; you nodded softly.
"So, how about now?" He asked.
You furrowed your brows and then heard it, I love you, Y/n.
A small smile paved your face, "yeah... I heard that." he leaned in, placing a soft kiss on your lips which you returned.
He thought again, I'm so sorry for everything… I can't lose you, not when I've barely had you. I'm trying my best, for you and for me.
Your eyes opened back up, you stared into his eyes. "I forgive you, Bucky. Just please don't hurt me again." You whispered.
Bucky gave you a nod, kissing your forehead. "I will never hurt you again."
With the soft blink of your eyes, you believed him. You opened up your blanket, inviting him in. He took his shoes off and slide in next to you, pulling you into his arms. You smiled as he held you close to him. "Y/n?" Bucky whispered. You looked up to him humming in response.
"If it's not too much to ask, could you show me your past?" He asked; you thought about it for a second before gently nodding. Bringing your hand up, placing your hand softly on his forehead. Cuddled up together, you confided in him once and, going back to show him what you'd been trying to tell him from the very start.
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All mistakes are my own, please do not repost, copy or translate my fics; all writing is my own. Thank you for all the support! Enjoy :))
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old friends. bucky barnes
word count: 1.7k
warnings: swearing, angst, mention of killing, guns, knives, lots of sarcasm and anger all the good stuff
requested: heey love! just saw that your requests are open and I thought I could request a Bucky oneshot because I am really in love with your writing. so, here's the idea: the reader is a skilled assassin herself but is more like an antihero. somehow she encounters the avengers, like Sam or Steve maybe, which is how she gets to know Bucky. They start to evolve feelings for each other blabla until one day buck looses control and beats her up like really really bad cause she doesn't wanna fight him back. I'd love to leave the ending and details up to you!
a/n: i have a couple other parts already written for this and while this particular part doesn't completely fulfil the request, it is the start of something along those lines so hang in there! this is just the beginning!
you held your gun at arms length, eyes darting around the hallway as you scoped out your surroundings. your feet padded along the concrete hallway, your body clad in a skintight leather suit that was chafing your thighs like crazy. your bottom lip was caught between your teeth, turning another corner to find it empty like all the rest. you let out a humph, your eyebrows knitting for a second as you lowered your gun.
"what the hell?" you muttered under your breath. you tucked your gun back into the holster before continuing down the hallway until you reached a dead end and a single door. your hand hovered over your gun as you pushed the door. you rattled the door handle but it didn't budge. you took a few steps back before running at the door and slamming your shoulder into it with a thud.
suddenly the door cracked open and you went flying inside the room, stumbling over your own feet. your hand quickly grabbed your gun as you tried to regain yourself. your eyes travelled up, the same time you lifted your gun and in front of you stood a round of familiar faces. your eyes practically rolled to the back of your head as you straightened yourself out.
"oh god," you let out an audible groan. "what the hell are you guys doing here?"
"we could ask you the same thing," sam quipped back. you sent him a glare out the corner of your eye before redirecting your attention to steve who stood at the forefront of the team of avengers.
"god, you cock blocks always ruin my fun," your hand remained glued to the gun you held out aiming at steve, who was eyeing you up with caution.
"i wouldn't call disrupting a military organised rescue mission fun," sam couldn't help himself. you got on every one of his last nerves and you loved it.
you shrugged. "well that's why we could never be friends, bird man," you rolled your eyes back over to when he cleared his throat to intervene.
"enough," you sneered at the way he lowered his voice. "if you don't turn around and leave, we have no choice but to take you in— you know that."
"or maybe i could just go ahead and kill all of you," your smile dropped from your lips, watching steves frown deepen because he knew what kind of threat you were. "then you wouldn't have to do anything."
"c'mon, y/n," tony spoke up. you glanced at him for the first time since you barged in. the man you probably hated most out of them all. you didn't give him more than a glance.
"none of you have any idea who's dirty work you're doing here," you fought back, your grip growing tighter on the handle of your gun. your teeth gritted. "always blindly following orders, hm?"
"and what about you?" natasha couldn't hold her tongue any longer. you cocked an eyebrow, pursing your lips as the red head spoke up. "how long were you under dreykov's thumb for?"
you clenched your jaw, you took a few angry steps closer before swinging your arm so the gun faced natasha now. "you are a traitor and a coward, and you have no idea what you're talking about," you spat hastily. she didn't flinch, her arms remained folded across her chest, staring down the barrel of the gun.
"alright— enough!" steve intervened again, slapping the gun out of natasha's face. she huffed and turned away from you. "will you put that gun away for christ sake, nobody's killing anyone today."
you gritted your teeth, breathing through your nose to steady yourself. you had once gotten along with the avengers until they turned their back on you. and seeing them again was bringing back old feelings.
"you always did take her side in a fight," you dropped your gun down for a second, backing towards the door but you were halted. your back collided into another person, you turned around and saw a man staring down at you, blocking your way out. he had long, dark hair covering most of his face but the pair of piercing blue eyes was what caught your attention first. you took a step back as he towered over you, your gun slipping for a split second but you recovered quickly and tightened your grip.
"hang on—" your eyebrows knitted together as you came to a sudden realisation. "how the hell did you get your hands on the winter soldier?" your eyes trailed up and down him, his expression staying the same until you uttered the name. his jaw tightened as he glanced down at his feet for a second.
he shook his head, meeting your eyes again before he spoke. “that's not my name."
"oh really?" you teased, eyebrow twitching upwards. "we've met before, if you want me to jog your memory?” you followed his gaze as he tried to avoid your piercing stare. he shook his head a little softer this time. you gritted your teeth. "you tried to kill me."
he faltered for a split second but quickly tried to disguise it. he sniffed, shaking his head again. "i had no control—"
"oh, well that makes all the trauma you inflicted ok then—"
"y/n!" steve growled, cutting you short as his patience began to wear thin with you. it always did, you knew how to push every one of their buttons.
"cut it out, kid. you made your point," tony mumbled, his eyes struggling to meet yours. you shook your head.
"i can't believe i ever associated with you cranks."
"she was an avenger?" a voice you didn't recognise spoke for the first time, you frowned. it was young, girl-ish and wearing spandex.
"no," you narrowed your eyes at him and he seemed to shrink back away from you. you glanced at tony again. "you're recruiting kids now? that must be sitting nicely on your conscience, tony."
"i'm not a kid," the spandex clad kid in the corner tried lowering his voice to disguise himself but he'd already given himself away.
"have fun dealing with that weight when he gets killed, alright?" you teased a little too darkly.
"you never did know when to stop talking," clint chimed in for the first time.
"how's the wife and kids, barton? haven't paid them a visit in a while— 'they still living out in—"
he took a step forward, his hand moving to grab an arrow, his bow swinging up to face you but it was natasha who held out her hand to stop him.
"always so dramatic," you rolled your eyes, turning away from the gang and back to where the winter soldier stood blocking your exit. you look him up and down again. "steve, you wanna tell your guard dog to move out of my way or do i have to make him?"
"you can't leave, you're involved," steve was short, he was trying not to lose his temper with you. you made it incredibly hard for anyone to be nice to you.
"also, you just told us you came here to deliberately sabotage this mission," sam added. "we can’t just let you leave to finish off what you started."
you eyed them both up irritably. realistically you had no way of leaving if they were going to try and stop you. you were greatly outnumbered.
you humphed. "what're you gonna do with me anyhow? guarantee you'll be sick of me in a couple hours and you'll have wished you let me go right now."
"it's not up to us," tony shook his head. "you've got a lot of people looking to hold you accountable for some pretty serious shit."
you shook your head, chewing on your bottom lip. "assholes," you murmured, more to yourself than to them directly. you narrowed your eyes at him, eyebrows furrowing at the tone tony was taking with you. "if i remember correctly, you've all done some pretty serious shit in the past but i don't see that catching up with any of you."
"it's not the same—" tony shook his head but you cut him off.
"no because you have money, a shit tonne of it, so you can make it go away," you humphed, eyes dragging away from tony. "i don't see natasha being held accountable— and trust me—if you think i'm bad—“
"will you shut it," natasha snapped, her fists clenching at her side.
you let out a soft smirk, seeing her breathing heavy out the corner of you eye. "full house," you mumbled under your breath, amused that you got a rise out of every one of them in a matter of minutes. "you're all so easy."
"you're coming with us," steve ignored your comment, nodding to bucky. he picked up his shield and walked passed you without even a glance in your direction.
"fat chance," you scoffed, but before you could reach for your gun again, you were swiftly disarmed by the winter soldier. he tucked your gun away and made to grab your wrists, only for you to smack his hands away. you shook your right arm downwards, letting your backup knife fall from your sleeve and into your palm. you lifted it to his neck, the blade pressed up against his skin. "try to touch me again and i swear to god i'll kill you."
he didn't seem to flinch. he picked up on the slight tremble in your grip that might have gone unnoticed by anyone else. bucky gave you a second before catching you off guard and slapping the knife away from his throat, his hand catching your wrist before prying it out of your grip.
you huffed. "you're making the wrong call following them," you teased as he spun you around, yanking your hands behind your back and restraining your wrists with a zip tie. "trust me, you'll regret it. and i think you have enough regret to last you a lifetime, and then some.”
he turned back round to face him, his breath fanning your face he had leaned in so close to you. "why would i trust anything you say?"
you shrugged, your lips dipping down for a second. "that’s fair— you probably shouldn't."
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Some dangerous men get a hold of your address and Bucky comes to save your ass. What happens the next day?
Warnings: Cussing (obviously), implied smut, outright smut, fluff, god save the queen (also this is my first time writing any smut so just know that lol)
18+ Only, Minors DNI
Bucky woke up and turned so he could see you asleep on the pillow beside him. You took his breath away. It was raining outside, and the gentle light coming in from the windows lit your delicate features, making you look so innocent and sweet. You were snoring faintly and it made him smile. Even your imperfections were perfect. He would be damned if he let anyone hurt you. He kissed your forehead as lightly as he could and then snuck out of bed to get ready for the day. His legs were stiff and sore as he walked slowly to the bathroom. He turned the shower on and turned slightly, catching a glimpse of his back in the mirror.
“Holy shit,” he whispered. There were red lines criss-crossing all over his back, a couple places had scabs where you had drawn blood. He turned and checked his chest only to find it littered with hickeys and some faint lipstick stains. Memories of screams, grasping hands, and desperate moans flashed through his mind and a slow smile graced his face. Last night had been…beautiful. He stepped under the warm water and hissed, the scratches stinging a little when they got wet. But his back, hips, and leg muscles needed the heat to help relax. After washing off and jacking off, he stepped out and dried off. When he came out of his bathroom, you weren’t in the bed anymore and his breath caught. His first thought was of the Dover Boys and how the hell they could have gotten in here to take you without him hearing anything. The rattle of pans in the kitchen grounded him and he sighed in relief. You were still here.
He slipped on a pair of boxers and gym shorts and then stepped out to find you. He followed the sounds of light music and singing to the kitchen where you were making eggs and toast for the two of them. His mouth fell slightly open when he rounded the corner. You were standing there, wearing nothing but a pair of his boxers and an apron. He was quite certain that you were going to be the death of him, and no death could be sweeter.
One of your recent favorite songs was playing, and Bucky loved it too.
“Sylvia?” he called, joining in with Mickey as he walked to stand beside you at the stove.
Your head popped up and you gave him a large, joyful smile. “Yes, Mickey?” you sang.
He picked up a wooden spoon and used it as a microphone. “How do you call your lover boy?”
You used the spatula that was in your hand. “C’mere, lover boy!” you sang with all the sexy gravelly voice you could muster.
“And if he doesn’t answer?” He flipped the stove off and grabbed you by the hand to pull you in.
“Oh, lover boy?” you answered sweetly, wrapping one arm around his waist and holding your spatula microphone with the other.
“And if he STILL doesn’t answer?” Bucky bit his lip, knowing his favorite part was coming next.
You crooned, “I simply say, ‘Baby, oooohhh baby! My sweet baby, you’re the one!’”
Bucky took your microphones and set them down, taking you by the other hand and danced with you around the kitchen, the two of you singing together. The song faded out and you looped both arms around his neck. You pulled him down to kiss you, taking charge and swirling your tongue around his mouth. You loved the way you could still taste his cinnamon toothpaste. You broke the kiss with a pop and shivered, his hands coming to rest on your sides so his thumbs could brush back and forth over the exposed sides of your breasts. “I’ve got breakfast and coffee ready for us. Then, I’d like to help you deal with…the boys…today.” You looked at him with a serious face. “I don’t take kindly to someone threatening me at my own home. Can I be part of today, please?”
“Anything for you, my love.” He said. “How many hickeys do you have this morning?”
You winked at him. “One too few, I think. Could I get another one right here?” you asked, pointing to where your neck met your collar bone. “I think it would look really pretty there to show off at our meeting.” Without hesitation, he nestled his face right where you had pointed. You sighed and leaned your head back to give him more room to work. You tangled your fingers in his hair; that earned you a good slap on the ass.
He stood back up to admire his handiwork. Satisfied, he lead you to the kitchen so you could eat.
.. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ..
You sat in Bucky’s chair behind his desk, cleaning your favorite pistol and waiting for the Dover’s to show up. Steve had set up a meeting between them and Bucky, but didn’t tell them what it was about. He just said that it was a good opportunity they would want to be a part of. He was waiting out front and Bucky…well, he was pacing back and forth, getting more and more angry. Not at you, never truly at you. Even yesterday he wasn’t mad at you, he was scared and mad at the situation.
“Mr. Barnes, darling, please sit down or come stand beside me. You’re going to wear tracks on my very expensive rug.” You were tense, and he could tell by the name you used. He walked behind you and started to rub your shoulders. You knew he was trying to be helpful, but it was also a good use of his nervous energy.
“Boss,” crackled the radio on the desk. “They’re here.”
You looked up at Bucky, a bit tense but also secure in your safety here. You nodded.
“Strip them of weapons and bring them up,” he commanded.
Less than five minutes later, two gentlemen walked into the office followed by a very angry Steve. “They had weapons. I specifically told them to not bring anything and what do these fuckin idiots do? They brought these!” he shouted, dumping a pile of hand guns, knives, and a taser onto the floor behind the desk. You cocked an eyebrow at the assortment and looked back up at the boys. “Thank you, Steve. Please step just outside the door in case we need you.” You focused your eyes on the desk in front of you and began snapping your own weapon back together. “You want to walk me through that thought process, boys?”
They just stared at you. “Mr. Barnes, they’re all yours.” You said without looking up.
Bucky walked around and sat on the front of the desk, giving you a nice view of his ass and strong back. You knew you had carved into that back last night and the thought of those marks made you crave him.
You put the last piece into place and slammed a magazine into it, cocked the gun to put a bullet in the chamber, and set it back down with a loud thump. Bucky was asking them if they knew why they had been asked to visit, asked them if they knew why he had killed their cousin, the usual small talk. But you didn’t want to wait for him to do something, you were madder than hell.
“Honestly, I don’t give a fuck who we shot,” you interrupted. Bucky stood and walked to the side of the desk, holding out his hand to you. You took it and stood as well, allowing him to guide you to the front of the desk with him. He leaned against the desk and pulled your ass flush against him, rutting against you while the Dover boys stared wide-eyed. “Do you understand what this show means?” They shook their heads at you, their eyes glued to where your skirt was beginning to ride up with the friction. “You’re leaving here in a body bag. You think you can use our men to get my address? You think you can attempt to put me in harm’s way without consequences?” By now Bucky had lost control of himself. He unzipped his pants and pulled the back of your skirt up the rest of the way, burying himself in you. It wasn’t an accident you had “forgotten” to pack underwear for today. “You think you can see him touch me like this without losing your eyes? This is going to be the last thing you see. You think you can hear him whisper love words in my ear? No, you’ll lose your voice so you can never repeat them. You’ll lose your ears so it’s the last memory of sound you have. You made a big mistake gentlemen. He might be the king of this city, the head of this mafia, but I’m his queen and everyone knows you respect his queen or pay in blood.” You let Bucky go a few more moments, enjoying the sensation, the audience, and the adrenaline. “Kneel.” You commanded. The two men were crying but couldn’t seem to look away. Bucky buried his face in the crook of your neck to muffle his whimpers. You had driven him beyond the point of return, he was so far gone for you. Your demanding voice sent shivers down his spine and he had to slow down so he didn’t cum too early. “I said kneel!” you shouted.
They sank to their knees and started to beg for their lives. You whipped your pistol up and shot them both between the eyes before Bucky registered what was going on, blood splattering everywhere. You moaned and came, dragging him along with you.
When the two of you had cleaned yourselves up with the washrag and baby wipes you kept in his drawer for such an occasion, you opened the door and ushered in the clean-up crew. Bucky was slumped in his chair, still dazed. “You wanna go home, honey?” you asked softly.
He looked up at you with tears in his eyes. “I love you so much, Y/n. I mean it. Will you move in with me? We can have your stuff in my house by the end of the day.” He grabbed your hands and guided you to sit on his lap. “I know you wanna get married, let’s go ring shopping tomorrow. Can we move you in today though? I love you and I don’t want to live another day without you.” He kissed your hands and sniffled.
“Oh, baby, I love you so much, of course I’ll move in with you!” You kissed him all over his lips, nose, cheeks, forehead, everywhere you could reach.
“Steve, will you bring my car to the front?” Bucky called. “And call the Francos, the Tanner boy, and a few other trusted guys. We’re gonna move my darlin’ to my house today.” He wrapped an arm around your back and one under your knees and picked you up. “I’m gonna hold you all the way to the house, and then carry you over the threshold. There ain’t a doubt in my mind you were made for me, babydoll. You drive me insane, you know that?”
You giggled and looped your arms around his neck. “I kinda had my suspicions during our meeting today.” You were looking forward to what the rest of life would bring with your Mr. Barnes. The two of you became the most dangerous couple in all of New York. Everyone knew to respect the king, but God help whoever disrespected the Queen.
.. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. ..
Thank you for reading! If you wanna see more of what I've written, my masterlist is the top pinned post on my blog. If you would like to be added to my tag list, let me know, and if you have thoughts, questions, concerns, comments, or requests feel free to shoot me an ask! Love y'all!
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The Falcon and the Winter Soldier Season Two: Agent Avery
Summary: During an intense interrogation, your existence is made obsolete when half the population is turned to dust. What felt like a mere five minutes was in fact— five years. ￼￼With the knowledge that Hydra was once again rising with intentions more sinister then the last, you do the job you were originally sent out to do. Protect Sargent James Buchanan Barnes at whatever means necessary. Kicking off right after the events of season one.
Prologue: “Cut off one head…” During an intense interrogation, your existence is made obsolete when half the population is turned to dust. What felt like a mere five minutes was in fact— five years. Setting out on an undercover op to observe the newly pardoned Super Soldiers post blip.
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📜 fluff 7 with bucky?
Bucky Barnes x gn!reader
Word count: 225
A/N: I hope you like this <3
Bucky and Sam have been bickering for about an hour already and frankly, you’re sick of it already. Those two kids trapped in a grown men bodies just don’t know when to shut the fuck up. And that’s not all - you would’ve forgiven them if it would be a good point for arguing and not the fact if sorcerers exist or not.
“Could you two possibly, maybe, just shut up already?!” you snap, finally saying something after bearing with them for quite some time. Sam stops in mid-sentence, both looking at you like you just disturbed a funeral.
“Were in the middle of something if you can’t see,” Sam replies, making you roll your eyes.
“Yeah, in the middle of a dumb debate. Stop talking, please, you’re both giving me a headache!”
“No buts Bucky, or you’ll be banned from kissing me for a week and you know I mean what I say,” you state, dedicating him one of those serious looks you know he fears.
“Wait, no, we’ll stop just don’t take kissing away from me, please,” he responds, starting to pout and looking at you with those puppy eyes. A child, as you already said before.
Sam laughs but shuts up the second your head turns to him. Turns out that being the parent of the group does has its perks.
Celebration now closed :)
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What Has Been, What Can Never Be I
Summary: Steve Rogers had returned to the past, hoping to move on from the chaos of the future. Leaving the woman that had loved him as someone more than just the persona of Captain America and his best friend that has always been with him until the end of the line.
But as he had come to settle in this new life back in his own time, regret was somehow coming to follow. When he decides to return to the present, things have changed and you, the woman that had always promised to be there for him was now happy with his best friend as the two of you moved on with your lives without Steve Rogers in it.
Characters: Bucky Barnes x Witch!Reader; Ex!Steve Rogers x Witch!Reader; Steve Rogers x Peggy Carter. Sam Wilson. Helmut Zemo. Sharon Carter.
Warnings: None For this Chapter
MASTERLIST || Join the Taglist || Requests Are Open
I: For The Ones That We Lost
Life has been different from what you had always thought it would be. But the sight of how your life had now become post-Steve Rogers was something to behold. You had always believed you would end up withering away in your own despair as Steve chose his past life over you. Choosing Peggy over you. But somehow here you were, a beaming smile on your lips as you helped Sarah with preparing food for everyone.
You had once lost your family at the hands of Tony Stark, vowed to kill him as retaliation, and eventually finding a family in the Avengers. A love you never thought you were still allowed to have, a family that you could somehow call as you own, as imperfect as it was.
"Are you heading back home?" Sarah had inquired.
With everything that had happened with the Flag Smashers, you had only thought it was best to get a few days off to rest--something you never really had been allowed to do since being dusted, to fighting Thanos, to everything else in between.
"Maybe." You shrugged, not really sure where Home was anymore.
With Tony long gone, as well as Nat and Steve, there wasn't really anyone you could come home to. Sokovia was no longer a home for you as much as it wasn't a home to Wanda.
You had remembered Zemo's offer in his castle and a small part of you wanted to take him up on that offer. Stay in your country for a while before you were back to work with Sam and Bucky if you were needed to be.
"Sam said you're looking for a place, ever thought about a place here? I know someone that can help you out with a place."
What you have never known of since the death of Tony Stark, was the trust fund he had place under your name as well as Wanda's, was it something he had always thought of to repay the sins of his past or was it just something he did after everything they've all been through. Being the father to you when you had lost your own. With the money, you wanted to start a new life, pursue higher education, or even just start a small little bakery or cafe like you had always dream of having with your family when they were still alive.
"I'll take you up on that offer, Sarah." You smiled at the older woman, appreciating all the hospitality she had given you and even Bucky since your arrival to their home. How easy she had treated you like a part of the family, unafraid of the powers that courses through your finger tips.
Maybe Louisiana is the place you could get your start. After everything you had lost, it was time for you to get back up on your feet and start rebuilding your life.
"Hope I'm not interrupting anything."
Turning to the owner of the voice, a smile rested on your lips at the sight of Bucky. Two cakes in his hands. A signature dessert he would bring whenever he comes to visit.
"Not much, James." You assured, letting go of the plates you were stacking to give the man a warm hug.
What many people don't know was their shared sentiments. They had lost so much in their life due to HYDRA's control, lost the freedom they once had, and lost someone that had always promised to be there when they need him the most. He had lost a best friend, and you had lost the only man you had ever loved.
It still hurts, you know as much, but for Bucky you know how much he was hurting more than you could even imagine. But slowly, the pain wasn't so painful like it used to be. They've got each other now, they got Sam, they got Sarah, and they got Sharon and even Zemo too (as much as Bucky would hate to admit it).
"How's the trip?" You inquired knowing how hard it was to travel all the way from Brooklyn to Louisiana.
"Got stopped by a couple of Metal Detectors in the airport." He points out and you broke into an carefree giggle.
A hand resting so freely on his vibranium arm. You had often teased him about it, how it's gonna be a problem he's gonna have to face on a daily basis especially when going to the airport.
"Please tell me you didn't scare the airport security." You teased.
"I did no such thing, Doll." He smirked hands resting on the small of your back. "But they did get the spooks when they saw the metal arm."
You nodded understanding, having been with him on one flight and seeing first-hand everything he had to go through and you tried your best to ease him fearing it would bring him back to a dark place.
"Let's get the show on the road, Love Birds." Sam's voice broke you two from your conversation and like being burned had you two pulling apart quicker.
The blush somehow found their way on both of your faces as the knowing look was shared between the Wilson Siblings.
"Can you help me with getting the plates and utensils out, Y/N?" Sarah finally offered knowing no one was going to save either of you from the awkward situation.
"Right." You had somehow found yourself taking all of the plates and utensil with you. You magic helping you out in the process.
"So you and Y/N?" Sam had inquired as soon as you and Sarah had left the kitchen leaving the two men to their own conversation.
"Sam." The warning tone was evident--but still ignored by the man.
The last thing Bucky would ever want is to take advantage of Steve's girl. But then again, you were no longer his girl. Peggy was his girl and you were just--someone he had left behind.
He could still remember the moment were you had talked to Steve's older self. A smile might had been on your lips, telling him how happy you were for him, for staying where he would be his happiest, but no one, not even Sam knew what you did after. The pained sobs that broke from your lips when you had thought no one was looking.
It was a pain Bucky was all too familiar with. He had known Steve would have stayed back in the past, but what he had never accounted for was keeping it a secret from you. Leaving you to hope and break your heart in the process.
"Take good care of her for me, Buck."
He had kept his promise to Steve. He had been there for you even when you didn't need his presence. Even when you had shoved him away time and time again in the earlier days of life after Steve, Stark, and Natasha.
You had lost three of the most important figures in your life, and he had wanted to make sure that he could be there for you, help in his own little way. Making you believe that there was still someone out there that cares for you. He cared, more than he would try to admit.
But then, things just evolved from his unspoken responsibility. He wasn't just taking care of you. He genuinely cared for you. One of the few peoples that had understood how he was still paying for the sins of his past. One that stood by him when everyone else turned their back on him.
His feelings were something he tried his best to hide. He wasn't better just yet. He wanted to be better before he could even think of whatever Sam was insinuating.
"You can scowl all you want but that definitely isn't just a friendly hug you two were in." Sam smirked patting him on the back before dragging him out of the porch.
"She's just a friend." Bucky muttered, hoping it was enough that even he could believe it.
"And I'm not Captain America." Sam snorts sitting him right down on the table--right in front of you, blush from whatever Sarah was telling you.
"What were you ladies talking about?" Sam had inquired knowing fully well it has something to do with Bucky and you.
"We were talking about a place I could buy." You intervened. "It's either here or Brooklyn." You continued.
It was enough for Sam to change the subject of whatever was going on between Bucky and you as he explain a few good places you could either rent or buy.
In the conversation, Bucky just couldn't help himself as he just looks at you. It took him a while to understand why the Punk had gone for you.
You were just a darling to be around. Rough around the edges--for a very good reason, but you just had this look in you. The doe eye that would make even the stone cold killer break even for just a second; it was him, he was the stone cold killer. You spoke your mind, but always placed everyone else's happiness before your own. You always downplay your abilities only for you to take down anyone you could ever come across with just a flick of your wrist.
Yeah. He might be in love--faster than he ever thought possible.
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𝐖𝐞’𝐥𝐥 𝐌𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐀𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧 | 𝐁𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐲 𝐁𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐬
𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐕𝐈𝐈𝐈- 𝐈’𝐥𝐥 𝐍𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐒𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐀𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧
Chapter VII | Series Masterlist
Word Count: 2.7k
Warnings: DEATH, dead body mention (nothing graphic). Major depression and grief. I’m sorry (I’d elaborate more but spoilers). I will say that this chapter goes deep into the feelings of grief, so if that is a sensitive topic for you, this is your warning.
A/N: Remember a few weeks ago when I said that one of my own works made me cry? Well… this chapter may or may not be what broke me. I’m sorry.
Some days taking care of Rebecca were good, some weren’t. It was odd how familiar the entire thing felt- helping her bathe, feeding her when she wasn’t able to feed herself, petting her hair until she fell asleep, it all reminded you of when she was a baby. Not much had changed, only now she could form coherent sentences. That is, if she had enough energy to do so.
When she did talk, she told you everything about her life, even more than she did when you were just a friend to her. She talked about her college days, about Rose- she really did love her, and it killed you that you never got to meet her- and she’d talk about her parents. There were so many people who loved Rebecca, so many people who made her who she was. It hurt like hell knowing you weren’t one of them until now, but more than anything, you wished that every single one of them were still here so you could meet them and thank them. Thank them for making her who she was, for taking care of your baby girl. Rebecca was raised by strangers to you, but they did a pretty damn good job doing it. You couldn’t help but wonder how different she would’ve turned out had you or Bucky never gone missing.
Rebecca gently shut her eyes, signaling that you could relax for a few hours while she slept. If it’d been any other person, you’d be off the clock. You’d be tired and worn out. But this was your baby. You would go to the ends of the earth and beyond to make sure she was healthy. After kissing her forehead gently- something you did every time she fell asleep as a baby- you made your way out to the living room, where Bucky was sat waiting for you.
“How’s our little girl doing?” he asked. You plopped next to him, his arm instinctively wrapping around you as you cuddled into his side. Over the time the two of you had spent together, Bucky remembered more and more about you. First, he remembered your wedding. Then the day you met, the many nights he’d knock on your door in the middle of the night just to kiss you, and nearly all of your pregnancy. The memory that hurt the most was saying goodbye to you, right before he left for the last time.
Oh, how he wished things were different. He wished he could turn back time, fake being sick and never go to war in the first place. He’d live out his days with you, taking care of Rebecca until he took his last breath, hopefully with his two best girls by his side. His aura was so full of love and warmth every time he was around the two of you, he always felt warm and fuzzy every time he looked back and thought about the 40s. He liked those days. But that was a completely different life. The one he was living now, though he was trying to get that warm and fuzzy feeling back, didn’t feel the same. He still loved you, he knew that for a fact. But he couldn’t help but feel like this wasn’t the life he was meant to live.
“She’s still running a fever.” You said, “But don’t worry, she’s still our happy girl.”
Bucky kissed the top of your head. He didn’t want to imagine what was likely about to happen. He couldn’t avoid it, as much as he wanted to. But he told himself that no matter how bad it got, no matter how hurt he felt, he would help you through it. You were the one to carry her for nine months, feel her kick from inside of you, nurse her and sing her to sleep as a baby. You were the one who managed to find her after all this, and now you were the one taking care of her again. You were in for a world of hurt, and though you were denying it and remaining positive, Bucky couldn’t avoid the truth.
Allowing yourself to relax for the first time all day, you listened as Bucky talked about his latest mission with Sam. To your objections, Bucky continued fighting. You were upset by his decision to keep putting himself in danger, but after hearing why he wanted to continue, there was no talking him out of it. He felt as though he owed the world something- something good. He’d spent decades hurting others- becoming an Avenger was his way of repaying his debts and clearing his guilty conscience.
You felt your eyes get heavy and your mind start to wander. Slowly, Bucky’s words began to fade, and you took in a deep sigh. You hardly got to relax like this anymore, with all the worrying, fighting, and working. The couch was too comfortable, Bucky’s body was just warm enough, and you dozed off. Bucky couldn’t even be upset, he knew how hard you worked and that you deserved to rest. Plus, you looked adorable as you slept, he couldn’t take his eyes off of you.
Bucky often found himself wondering how you still chose to be with him. After everything, you still saw him as who he used to be and who he had the potential of becoming. You didn’t see the monster HYDRA made him. You didn’t see the man who’d killed hundreds of people. You still chose to be his life partner, seeing him as your downstairs neighbor from Brooklyn who you fell in love with. Tracing your jawline with his finger, Bucky couldn’t help but think about how strong you were compared to him. Taking care of Rebecca, helping him remember his old life, adjusting almost immediately to a new life and continuing to be wonderful and kind- you could handle anything, and you did it all without him. That, above everything, made him fall deeper in love with you.
Gently, Bucky picked you up bridal style and moved you to your new bedroom. Since moving into Rebecca’s house to take care of her, Bucky let you have the only other bedroom while he slept on the floor in the living room. He still considered himself your husband, he was still very much in love with you- but he didn’t want you to be there when his nightmares came. They were worse than they were before. Now that he was remembering his life with you, he was also remembering all the years in between the 40s and now. All the people he’d hurt, all the lives he’d taken. You always told him that you had no problem with him sleeping next to you, but he knew it was for your own good. He didn’t feel deserving of a bed, and would much rather take the floor, in a room where you couldn’t hear or feel him wake up.
Three hours had gone by. Three peaceful hours. Bucky had managed to get a few minutes of shuteye, and you were particularly comfortable in the spot Bucky had tucked you in. Your alarm went off to check on Becca, one you set every three hours in the night, just to check if she needed anything. Bucky heard the familiar alarm from the bedroom, followed by the door opening and your footsteps heading over to Rebecca’s room.
This life you led with Bucky, it had a funny way of working. The minute things started to feel perfect, something just had to be taken away.
Bucky’s eyelids started to get heavy again, the idea of getting a few more minutes of sleep in creeping into his mind. Then he heard you wail from the bedroom, and he was immediately on his feet, any feeling of tiredness gone the second he heard your distress.
He ran as quickly as he could to the main bedroom, eyes fixated on you crying in front of Rebecca’s bed. Rebecca looked exactly as she did when she fell asleep. She hadn’t moved a single muscle.
Rebecca was gone. His biggest fear, the inevitable, had become a reality.
“No, no, no,” you kept repeating, a sob emitting from the back of your throat. This was the deepest, most guttural pain you’d ever felt. Like someone had stabbed you in your heart and ripped it out with their bare hand. You knew this would happen. You knew it had to happen, Rebecca was in her seventies, but you wanted so badly for it to never happen. That she would live forever, or at least until after you and Bucky were gone. Not now. Not like this.
You heard Bucky crying with you. He was holding you while you cried and screamed into his chest, painfully listening and holding onto you.
Your baby, the old woman who you were able to identify from a mile away as your daughter, was gone. Your heart ached as it shattered in your chest, leaving broken pieces that were beyond repair. That baby who you’d worked so hard for, who you loved with every ounce of you and more, who lived an entire life that you were so proud of. Gone overnight.
When the coroner came, you felt nothing but numbness. You watched as they took Rebecca off of her bed and onto the stretcher, though Bucky could tell it would’ve been better if you looked away. You had to lie through your tears, saying you and Bucky were her caretakers. Not her parents- that was Edward and Marjorie, and they were long gone. Only you and Bucky knew the complicated truth, and you wanted to scream it out to the world, but it would only make things worse.
Though your heart still ached every day you were without her, and you found yourself randomly crying throughout your days, you found a little more comfort every day. It wasn’t the same kind of comfort you once knew, and you knew it was likely you’d never feel the same way again, but little things added up. You found support through Bucky, Steve, Sam, Natasha, and everyone else at the Compound. They made it clear to you and Bucky that you always had a home with them. And though you weren’t ready to step back into Rebecca’s home just yet, you knew you had a room at the Compound waiting for you.
The room was just as bare as it was when you left it, not a single indication that anyone had ever lived here or put any effort into decorating it. You ended up exactly where you started, confused and lonely in a bare room. Only now, you had one of the people you’d been yearning for. And while having Bucky was great, he didn’t fill the void that Rebecca had left behind.
Bucky approached you slowly, watching you reach into your pocket for the folded up picture of Rebecca’s first birthday. She’d given it to you shortly after you told her the truth, claiming you needed it more than she did.
“You hungry?” Bucky asked, wrapping his arms around you from behind, “We can go somewhere if you want.”
He was trying his best. He didn’t know what he could do or say to make you feel better. He didn’t know what anyone else could do or say to make him feel better. He lost his daughter, too. Bucky felt the numbness. The void. The heartache. And he wanted more than anything to make it go away; if not for him, then for you.
“How do people move on?” you asked, placing the picture in front of you on the mantle and looking at it. You looked so happy. So did Bucky. Rebecca’s first birthday was a day you’d always remember- one of your last happy memories before things went south. More than anything, you wanted to go back. To hold your baby one more time, to live in that ignorant bliss. “After a loss like this? You see it in the news, people losing their children. I would think ‘If that ever happened to me,’” you shook your head, at a loss for words as you looked at the ground, “and now here I am.”
Bucky held you a little tighter as you tried to hold back the tears. You didn’t know you were capable of producing so many until now. But with the quiver of your lip, and the tears blurring your vision, you had no choice but to break. Turning around to face Bucky, you buried your head in his chest. “I just want my life back, James. I want things to be the way they used to. Before everything.”
Bucky’s heart was already broken the minute he saw Rebecca, but hearing your words and how hurt and hopeless you sounded, it only made the damage worse. Both of you had produced enough tears to fill an ocean, and you knew that pain would stay as long as both of you were still alive.
“I don’t know what I can say to make you feel better, I’m just as lost as you are.” Bucky admitted, his voice nearly a whisper, “But I love you. And I love her. Nothing will ever change that.” He pressed a soft kiss on your forehead.
“I’m not hungry.”
“I’m just tired.” You found yourself saying that a lot. To avoid talking to anyone or hearing the overwhelming amount of condolences you were receiving, you slept. It seemed like all you ever did was sleep nowadays.
“Okay. I’ll let you rest.” Bucky said, pulling away before you stopped him.
“Can you stay? Please?” You had a hint of desperation in your eyes.
Bucky always seemed to be unable to say no to you. Even back then, the very idea of upsetting you took a toll on him, so he always bent over backwards to make sure your needs were met. On your first date when he stole an apple for you- he was perfectly capable of buying one for you himself, but he wanted to see you smile. When you were pregnant, all the times he’d make his way to the convenience store at an ungodly hour because you were craving Peppermint Patties- he was on a first-name basis with the owner and he was about as involved in your pregnancy as Bucky was with how often he bought the candies from him. And now. Your heart was in pieces. You’d just experienced the biggest heartbreak imaginable, a heartbreak no person should ever go through. And you were asking him to stay with you. To lay in the same bed as you. He had to oblige, because if it made you feel just an ounce better, it was worth it.
He laid in bed next to you, stiff on the mattress that was a little too soft for comfort. No matter, he could ignore it for now.
You wrapped your arm around Bucky, holding onto him in a spooning position that made your heart feel slightly better.
The idea of peace seemed far away. Maybe it would never come at all. Right now, despite holding onto your husband and feeling the bond you two created decades ago grow stronger, you felt as though you would never feel truly happy again. There was still a pain that would never leave. But there was an understanding between you and Bucky that things would always be different now, and that you’d have to help each other through all the low moments.
But you knew you would help each other. You were all Bucky had, and he was all you had now. So you held onto him tight, fearing that if you let go, he would just be another thing you would lose in this new, harsh reality.
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The Eleventh Hour
Summary: After their anniversary dinner is crashed, Bucky reluctantly leaves home for the mission. Leaving YN alone in their shared home. Impatient and desperate to get back to her.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Word count: 3478
AN: Here’s part 2 of Clockwork, as requested. It probably does not live up to expectations and for that I apologize😂. Thank you so much for reading, hope you enjoy! GIF is not my own credit to original creator.
Read Clockwork here!
Pick up… come on, Barnes. Pick up.
YN bit down on her lip, fingers tapping against her phone. Fast tempo, irregular beats. Thrumming over the dial tone. She huffed as she was sent to voicemail again, poor attempts to tamp down a rising surge of panic.
Bucky had warned her, in all fairness, that he probably wouldn’t have his phone on him for the majority of his time away. And of course, YN’s logical senses told her it wasn’t the best idea for a phone call while under fire. But she still worried.
When he did happen to have his phone, he reached her voicemail. The one time over four whole days she could’ve talked with him and she missed it.
It was disconcerting, how unreachable he was. YN didn’t care for it at all. But Bucky couldn’t let her know where they were going- some stupid rule Steve put into place preventing knowledge from seeping out into unwanted groups. YN took that to mean Steve didn’t trust her, he didn’t know her, and he didn’t like her.
Bucky insisted that Steve had always enforced that protocol, it was a safe guard. It didn’t help ease the worry any. YN still paced back and forth every night, clueless as to where Bucky was or if he was in imminent danger. It was infuriating.
She also didn’t like how quiet the house had been since he was away. YN logged a lot of hours at the hospital, a near constant drum of activity. She was never alone at their house, Bucky was almost always there.
When she came home, the house always felt alive with energy. Buzzing with some kind of noise. Maybe Bucky’s music playing over the speaker, or a TV show he had forgotten to turn off, soft humming as he worked, streams of expletives as he attempted to repair the kitchen sink.
But now… it was silent. It wasn’t even a comforting silence. A quiet, stifling static filling the empty walls. Four days of nauseating worry mingling with static unease created an ache behind YN’s sternum she couldn’t quite rid herself of.
The main reactant to her anxiety was Bucky’s well-being. He had left so unhappily. He never said it outright, but she could tell that he despised Steve for enlisting his help. Again. It was evident throughout his body. The tension in his broad shoulders, the reluctant anger in his eyes. A light flush of heated emotion creeping from under his shirt, from his chest to his neck.
Now as she sat, staring into the kitchen wall, fretting with the skin of her thumb, every anxiety seemed to crash into her chest at once. YN knew how much work he put into himself when they started dating. How long it took for Bucky to invite her to his apartment, the weeks it took to actually go out in public on a date. The methodical glances he would make at every exit in a building wherever they went.
She hated to think about the ‘what if’s’. The havoc wreaked upon his mind as he reentered a battlefield. How all his progress could come crashing down. It didn’t help she couldn’t reach him on the phone. YN kept telling herself she would’ve felt better if she could have checked up on him, at least once. Because in reality, Bucky left their home and he could never return. Mentally or physically.
The thought petrified her.
YN didn’t know what she would do if Bucky never came back. He was usually the voice of reason in the household, managing to talk her off of several proverbial ledges. Creating such a warm atmosphere around her, chasing away cold fingertips. Threatening to snatch one, or both, back into a dark room of their subconscious. Without his stability, she felt she would crash and burn.
“Fuck!” YN hissed, glancing down to her nails. A small drop of blood slipped from her thumb, the skin rubbed raw. Irritated and red. Stinging at the exposure. The sharp pain was enough to force her back into reality. “Pull yourself together.”
Bucky was a grown man. He was capable of handling things. He would do what he had to do in order to survive. He would come home.
She wasn’t helping anyone by staring off into her kitchen wall, worrying and simmering in fear. Crumbling under the intense pressure of anxious thoughts. YN huffed, shoving away from the table. Standing up to gaze around the kitchen.
She just needed to be distracted.
Bucky slumped back into his jump seat, digging through his duffel bag in frustration. He knew he had thrown that stupid phone in there somewhere- right before they left for Australia. He had called YN before they took off, then thrown the device into his bag. It had to be there.
“I know you’ve been… off the grid for a while, Barnes, but I didn’t know you turned into a wild animal during your time.” Tony snipped, his lip raising as he observed the man, grunting and unceremoniously shoveling through a well used duffel bag. Bucky scowled in the billionaire’s direction, eyes filled with fury.
“Mind your business, Stark.” He growled, only fueling the electric tension between them. Tony rolled his eyes, spreading his arms wide.
“This whole place is my business. In case you didn’t notice, this aircraft was purchased with Stark money.” Tony’s grin was deprecating, haughty.
Bucky huffed, zipping his bag up. Fingers digging through the pockets on the outside. Cold glass meeting his warm fingertips, fishing the phone from It’s pocket. Gotcha.
“I didn’t ask to be here.” Bucky clarified, turning the device on. He stared down at the glowing screen, waiting impatiently for his lock screen to show up.
He had waited too long, about four days too long, to talk to her again. He was becoming desperate to hear her voice, even more so to feel her skin against his. Irritation bubbling in his veins that he wasn’t with her. Wasn’t able to kiss her so long he ran out of breath, turned red in the face. Bucky swore that as soon as he got home, he wasn’t letting her out of his sight, or bed, for days.
He was looking forward to nothing but warm sheets and a soft embrace. Quiet conversations under moonlit stars. Making an actual meal and enjoying it with someone who didn’t talk espionage strategy. Or maybe even a full night’s sleep.
If there was one thing the mission did for him, was put his progress into perspective. Bucky hadn’t even realized how far he had made it. How much help YN had been in the process. He had become so spoiled with YN, sleeping all night, eating three times a day, having the energy to shower and carry a conversation with her.
But that energy was running lower every day he was away from her. Away from the comfort and safety of home.
“Yikes… someone is grouchy.” Tony commented under his breath, eyes cutting over from Bucky to the trio of people making their way up the loading ramp.
Steve led the group, walking in front of Sam and Peter. Originally, the kid wasn’t a part of the plan and neither was Tony. But when Sam suggested they have Peter use his abilities to help out, Tony began shutting the mission down.
Bucky had been all for it- he could go back home, forget it ever happened. Change his phone number again. Everything would be fine.
Until Peter Parker came up with the fabulous idea of Mr. Stark supervising. He would be on a probation type of mission, just so he could see that the kid was capable of handling bigger things than helping little old ladies cross the street.
And the mission was back on.
Bucky instantly craved violence.
“Hey, Captain Handsome, what’s got Frosty’s panties in a twist?” Tony shouted at Steve, making sure everyone became involved in the now argument between the two men.
Bucky rolled his eyes, unlocking his phone. A few messages from YN, a couple missed calls. Relief settled over his chest. Thanking every deity he was aware of that he would be home in a few hours. Away from the testosterone filled jet housing the biggest ego’s he had ever witnessed.
“Do you ever close your mouth?” Bucky muttered, keeping his eyes glued to the messages he had missed.
“Why don’t you come over here and make me, like you did my mother-“
“Alright!” Steve shouted, spinning around to face the arguing pair. He sighed, pressing his fingers into his temples. “You’ve been at this all week. Knock it off until we land.”
“No promises.” Tony griped, stalking past the group toward the pilot’s deck. Bucky scoffed, buckling himself into his seat.
Steve frowned, eyebrows marching together as his mouth twisted. Bucky’s attitude had been the same ever since they left his house. Ornery and cantankerous, snarling at everyone he had come in contact with so far. Snapping at Steve, arguing with Tony and Sam.
The only time it had changed was when Peter asked about his new life one night. Bucky gave a short answer, much more civil with the kid than he was with anyone else, though he still scowled as he gave his response.
Steve couldn’t believe any of the events that had happened. He had fully expected to stumble upon Bucky holed up in a dingy apartment somewhere, barely holding onto life. He found the opposite. Th e blonde was beginning to experience whiplash from the mood swings and life changes his friend was making.
He hadn’t expected a anyone to be living with Bucky, much less the woman he found. YN had been nothing but kind. Ensuring the two strangers were cared for and comfortable. While Bucky did everything he could while her back was turned to ensure the opposite.
The silent anger that radiated off the man was astounding. The Bucky he knew had no issues voicing his temperament. Steve didn’t know how to handle to building rage- apparent in every aspect of the brunette’s body language.
“We’re headed home now, crabby ass, could you act like an adult for that long?” Steve griped, glaring at Bucky.
Bucky’s lip curled over, a mocking expression shot at his friend. Peter carefully stepped around the icy pair, taking his seat beside Sam.
“Hold on to your ass, Spiderboy, it’s about to get real weird.” Sam warned, quietly clipping his buckle into place.
“Don’t tell me how to act, I didn’t want to be here in the first place.” Bucky grumbled, fingers twisting into the harness straps. A visceral, audible groan slipped from Steve’s mouth.
“We know.” Steve hissed, kicking at Bucky’s shin. The brunette growled, kicking back childishly. He grit his teeth before he continued. “You’ve mentioned it a few times.”
Bucky shook his head, a low chuckle rising from his chest. His body felt too warm, jacket too restrictive over his broad shoulders. His nose burned, indignant anger boiling through his body. Threatening to take control.
“Listen, man- I’m sorry I interrupted your date night but you’ve-“
“I was gonna propose.” Bucky spat, nostrils flaring at his friend. Steve’s mouth hung open, brows marching together. Staring down the barrel of an angry veteran. “I had this whole thing planned out, it took me months to- ,” Bucky’s voice wavered, struggling to cap his anger before it got out of hand. “I was hidden for a reason.”
Steve’s brain stopped, unable to process anything further. Bucky huffed, exhaling harshly. Angrily shoving himself back further into his seat, crossing his arms over his chest. Sam sucked in a deep breath, sharing a small glance with Peter, who didn’t really understand what was happening.
A ton of bricks was dumped on his chest. Crushing him flat. Bucky had changed. He had made a life without anyone from his past, including Steve. The blonde’s nose stung, eyes watering as he realized his friend fully intended on keeping him out of the loop. Abandoned. Bucky could’ve started a family and if Steve hadn’t gone looking for him, he never would’ve known.
“You could’ve chosen anyone else.” Bucky declared, staring Steve directly in the eyes. A deep, permeating scowl on his lips. “There’s a thousand agents at Shield, Romanoff, Barton… why did you have to hunt me down after I told you I wanted out?”
Steve sighed, holding tight to the straps across his body as the jet took off. His knuckles ached at the pressure, muscles tensing as he stared at his friend. He was no stranger to Bucky’s explosive temper, the fuse lit ever since he regained consciousness from the Soldier. A continuous rage boiling under the surface. Fueled by eighty years of pent up fear and anger.
But Steve had it too. His chest burned, vexation boiling under his skin. Throat constricting, threatening to collapse with white hot rage.
“You’re the best we’ve got, Buck. The best I know.” Steve explained, unclipping his restraint as the jet leveled out. “I thought that maybe you would’ve wanted some sort of revenge on Hydra. At least once.”
It was a stretch of his true intentions, both men knew the truth. Steve was worried about his friend. He wanted him back again. Now that he knew Bucky was alive and the Winter Soldier was gone, Steve wanted what he always had. His best friend.
“If I wanted that, I would’ve stayed.” Bucky reiterated, leaning forward as far as he could. “But I didn’t-“
“I know!” Steve interrupted, the words echoing around the jet. Bucky’s mouth closed, eyes boring into Steve’s skull. “You got out- you left… What happened to the end of the line, Buck? Because you were gonna get married to someone, and you didn’t want me to know?”
As soon as the words left, Steve knew how bad they sounded. How selfish. But he couldn’t stop them. His chest was too tight, lungs expanding too large, heart pumping too fast. Senses overloaded, his vision blurred.
Steve was still that skinny kid from Brooklyn, no matter the century. No matter the circumstance. All he ever needed was Bucky, the one person who stuck by his side. Who was always there for him.
“I’m tired, Steve.” Bucky exhaled the words, years weighing heavy on his shoulders. Anger melting from his body, replaced with worn down exhaustion as he watched Steve’s eyes. The pain and fear of abandonment obvious, clear to the man who had seen it all. “All I’ve ever done is fight. In back alleys for you, the war, for Hydra, and everything that followed… I just wanted something… I wanted something for myself. And I found it, found her. And I don’t want to put YN through this. She doesn’t deserve it.” Bucky removed his own seat restraints, leaning forward. Resting elbows on his knees. Fingers twisting anxiously. “The best revenge I can have is to make a good life with YN.”
Steve felt his heart deflate. He had taken Bucky out of a comfortable environment, selfishly. Just to see his friend again. To have his Bucky back. But he wasn’t the same person… Bucky would never be the same guy he knew in the twenties.
“That… it’s a good plan.” He decided, watching the lines on Bucky’s face shifting. A hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. Steve returned it, melancholy settling into his gut.
“I’ve had some things put into perspective over the past year, really knocked some sense into my skull.” Bucky laughed quietly, eyes drifting down to his hands. “You should try it sometime, running away I mean. Really helps clear your mind.”
Steve chuckled, meeting Bucky’s grin with one of his own. The tension eased between the pair of super soldiers, the pressure of the cabin dropping from atmospheric heights. Bucky was still pissed, angry that Steve had pulled him away from his new life. He would be for a while, until he cooled off. When he was at home, holding his girl.
“Don’t just take off again, alright, Buck?” Steve’s voice was quiet. Pleading. Bucky pursed his lips, watching his friend’s blue eyes morph into a certain sadness. A familiar sadness. Fear tinging the edges, staining them with worry.
“I guess I could try to make an effort to include you.” Bucky gruffed, clearly unhappy with having to share his new life. Steve grinned even wider, finally forcing the old grouch to budge. If all he had to do was show puppy dog eyes he would’ve done it a lot sooner. Who knew Sargent Barnes had gone so soft?
“I’m never leaving your house, by the way. You have a very comfortable couch.” Sam interrupted, unbuckling his safety belt. Bucky squinted at him, shifting uneasily as he remembered where he was. Suddenly, he felt too exposed. The pressure of their eyes collapsing his lungs. Vulnerable, defenses raising again.
“You had the guest bedroom- you didn’t even sleep on the couch.” He retorted, watching the man unlace his boots and kick them off. Sam shrugged, opening his mouth to respond.
“Can I sleep on your couch?” Peter’s head popped up between them. Wide brown eyes full of hopeful excitement. Bucky frowned, realizing the kid wormed his way onto the team by using those same eyes.
“No one is coming to my house or sleeping on the couch. You’re all forgetting the address.” He demanded, unbuckling himself from the seat. Sharp snickering erupted from the two grown men. Bucky ignored them, stripped his jacket off and tossing it on top of his bag before walking toward the back end of the jet.
“Where are you going, now?” Steve asked, wiping a hand through his damp hair. Sam pulled a couple towels from the overhead compartment, tossing one to the blonde before throwing one over Peter’s head.
“Cargo bay.” Bucky snipped, quickly ducking away before anymore questions could be voiced. He didn’t know how much longer he could stand being around the group of men. He was exhausted, physically and emotionally, eager to hear a familiar voice. Something to soothe the ache in his soul.
A quiet grunt fell from her lips as YN bent down over the clothes hamper, snagging a pair of jeans left crumpled on the bathroom floor. Shoving them into her basket and continuing on her trek toward the machine.
Bucky typically carried out the chores around their home, insisting that he would take care of them. He told her over and over that she had enough on her plate at the hospital. But on her days off, she could be found right there beside him, doing laundry or washing dishes.
Plopping her basket down on the tile floor, YN began sorting. Humming along quietly to the playlist she had going. Mind drifting to Bucky, for the seventh time that day, wondering if he would be home soon. If he was okay.
‘Promise me you won’t make him kill again.’
She shivered, hoping that Sam held up his end of the bargain. YN didn’t know how she would react if Bucky walked through the front door. Sapphire eyes cracked and glassy, his mind fractured again. She might buy a plane ticket to New York just to kick Steve Rogers in the pants.
Because YN was angry. She had spent the last week stewing in emotions, several in fact. But the one that occurred more frequently was white hot anger at the Steve and Sam for roping Bucky back into the hero scene. They had more than enough manpower, why would they need Bucky back after all that time?
Especially Steve- his best friend, who knew exactly what Bucky had been through. Seen it up close, too personal. But as far as YN knew, from what Bucky had told her, Steve always found him. For better or worse, one revolved around the other. She only wished it had been better circumstances this time around.
YN blinked, realizing she had been staring down into the pile of clothes. She exhaled sharply, shaking her head as she went back to her task at hand. Her hands digging through pants pockets as she tossed them over to the machine.
Bucky had a bad habit of leaving items in his pockets. YN had discovered that information the hard way- washing a load of laundry with a tube of chapstick in his pocket once. Ruining several of their clothing items, red stains that refused to come out marring the fabric no matter how frantically Bucky scrubbed.
As predicted, Bucky’s pockets were all harboring treasure. Loose change in one, chapstick, bolts (must’ve been from one of his projects in the garage), a lighter, and…
Her fingers brushed against thin metal, something hard on an end. With furrowed brows, YN slipped the mystery item from his pants pocket, holding it in her palm.
Oh… oh… she probably wasn’t supposed to find this.
Her breath caught in her throat as she stared into her hand. The glimmering diamond reflecting the soft sunset lighting. Small, fractured rainbows dancing beneath it against her skin. YN’s throat went dry as her thoughts solidified, brain finally catching up to her body.
“Holy shit…” she muttered, dropping the pair of sweatpants to her feet. Fingers tracing over the metal circle in her palm.
She recognized the pants, too. They were the ones he wore at their anniversary dinner. Bucky had been planning that entire evening, she should’ve known he was up to something when he insisted she stay upstairs instead of helping.
The Bucky Barnes she knew was not big on spontaneity. He had been planning that night for a long time if the ring was involved. Knowing that information, YN’s heart sank even further when she remembered she had forgotten their anniversary. Forgotten about the dinner he poured so much effort into.
Sometimes, she really hated her brain.
YN slipped the ring onto her finger, wiggling her hand in the light. Admiring the sight, though the feeling she would have to get used to. Guilt settling around the eager anticipation in her chest. She should have never forgotten the date, maybe looked at a calendar when she was at work or something.
And on top of forgetting, she found his surprise. Now he would know she found it- she was terrible at lying to him. YN smacked her forehead in frustration, disappointment running through her veins. She was going to crush him, she ruined his plan.
Just as she was gazing down into the diamond again, YN’s phone began buzzing. She jumped, nearly out of her skin, heart rate exploding into an unreasonably fast beat. Her hand smacked into her chest as she took a steadying breath.
Bucky was calling.
She couldn’t act normal yet, she just found the ring! But he couldn’t go to voicemail again, YN wanted to hear his voice more than anything she had ever felt. She took another deep breath, steeling her nerves before she slid her finger across the screen. Clearing her throat before speaking.
Bucky lifted an eyebrow upon hearing the pitch in YN’s voice. She was up to something. As much as he adored her, the woman would never be the worlds greatest super spy. She couldn’t hide her trouble making, not to him at least.
“Whats going on?” He asked, listening carefully. YN’s eyes shifted nervously to her left hand, eyes tracing the shimmering rock on her finger.
Her mouth opened, ready to spill it all but she managed to stop herself just in time. She couldn’t ruin this for him. YN knew him better than that- Bucky would want things done right. He had a plan and he would want to stick to it. As much as he had given her, she could solidify his plan. She could play along.
“Nothin’, just… doing some chores.” YN responded nonchalantly, tucking her tongue into her cheek. He was a trained assassin, he would be able to hear her tone. She was busted for sure.
“Okay…” Bucky replied, dragging the word out. Eyes narrowed suspiciously. “I’m just calling to let you know we’re stateside. Should be home in a few hours.”
“Then I’ll wait up for you. Have you eaten?” YN questioned, the words rushed out, grateful to have the subject switch. She wasn’t a good liar to begin with, but when it came to him- she was done for.
“Don’t worry about that, sweetheart.” Bucky insisted, shoving his hand into his pocket. Wincing as he thought about the last time she made him dinner. Bucky still sends apology notes to the fire department. “You’re probably exhausted. Don’t worry about waiting up or anything. I’ll be there when you wake up.”
“I’ll take that as a no, then. So I will be making a late dinner and I’ll be waiting when you get here. No arguing.”
Bucky chuckled, peeking over his shoulder for eavesdroppers before responding. He didn’t trust any of his teammates not to listen in, just so they would have ammunition to tease him with later.
“We’ll do it your way, then.” He relented, sighing as he heard a slight crackling noise over the phone. “We’re gonna get cut off soon, don’t have very good reception on these jets. So I will see you when I get home, okay? I love you.”
“Love you, stay safe.” YN replied, turning her phone back off as he hung up. A tense exhale leaving her chest. She did it. Glancing back down to the new jewelry adorning her finger. “That’s enough of you, for now, troublemaker.”
She slipped the ring off her finger, immediately going to their bedroom. YN put the jewelry down on Bucky’s dresser. He would know sooner or later, anyways. Sparing one last, giddy glance at it before she left, YN couldn’t stop the butterflies that stormed her chest. Or the grin that plastered itself onto her lips.
Mrs. Barnes… yeah, that sounded nice.
“YN?” Bucky shouted, slamming the door closed with a boot. He dropped his duffel bag beside the wall, a metallic clang of weaponry following. Pattering footsteps sounded off from above his head. YN‘s face popped out from around the corner of the stairs, grinning at him. “There you are.”
She bounded down the steps, two or three at a time. He forced himself not to leap forward to steady her but before he could blink, she was right in front of him. Pulling his body to hers. Arms tight around his waist. Instinctively, Bucky’s hands found her figure, resting in their usual place: one on her neck, the other between her shoulder blades. Cradling her warm skin against him.
Bucky inhaled deeply, burying his face in her neck further. YN giggled, pulling back to look at his face. He frowned playfully, giving an annoyed whine that she had cut their embrace short.
“You have a beard.” Her hands came up, resting on his cheeks. Fingertips running over the hair carefully. Bucky smiled, pressing a kiss to her forehead.
“I didn’t really have a razor. Or time.” He responded, allowing his touch to drift lower. Resting innocently on her hips. YN hummed, thumb traveling up to trace the cut on his eyebrow tenderly.
Bucky stood as still as he could, allowing her the time to give him a once over. Looking for any more damage. He hated that she felt the need to search- hated that she had to. YN cared so much, and for him at that, it made Bucky’s heart ache. He didn’t even have to wonder what the last four days had meant for her. Here, in their home. Alone, confused, worried sick.
Watching her careful eyes trail down to his chest, gentle fingers massaging over aching muscles for injury, Bucky tried his hardest not to hate his friends for their interference. Though it was hard not to, knowing they tracked him down and then knowingly kidnapped him from his home. What he wanted to do was punch them both so hard he didn’t have to dig a grave but he couldn’t do that. Not if he was going to be New Bucky.
New Bucky wasn’t as wary or paranoid, not until he was set off, anyways. He wasn’t explosive. New Bucky was patient, learning to take a moment to consider. To breathe. He was a glass half full guy. He had to be. For the sweet little thing standing before him, giving him all the attention she had. Giving him everything she had.
He could be that for her.
“This was a one time thing,” Bucky murmured, catching her searching hands. He tugged her closer again, pressing his lips to her forehead gently. “I swear.”
“Bucky, honey… It’s alright.” YN assured him, her eyes framed by long lashes. Skin reflecting the golden light, streaming through the windows. Her doe like expression only making his gut churn faster, guilt rolling into a lead ball. Threatening to send him through the floor. “It’s your job-“
“But It’s not my job.” He insisted, a harsh tug on her hands made him wince. Realizing too late he had forgotten his strength again. An apology in the form of smooth circles over her knuckles. Careful movement. “Not anymore. I chose this life. The life where I get to live with a wonderful woman in a house, where I don’t have to look over my shoulder. Somewhere that allows a complete do over. And I found it here with you… I don’t ever wanna leave this… leave you.”
YN smiled brightly, unable to force her lips into any other configuration. Her fingers brushed through his hair, cradling his face. Bucky hummed contentedly, swaying her gently.
“Is this your proposal?
Bucky’s eyes snapped open, head tilting back and eyes narrowing as he looked at her down his nose. YN only did the opposite, eyes wide and innocent. Head tilted to the left. Bucky had to steel himself against the infamous puppy eyes, not allowing her to win by default this time around.
“You found the ring.” Bucky assumed, sighing heavily. YN felt a sting of guilt in her chest, constricting against her lungs and heart.
“I didn’t mean to ruin your surprise… I was doing laundry.” She admitted. Bucky clicked his tongue, a playful, look of disapproval in his blue eyes. They softened soon after seeing how distraught she truly was, fingers gently pushing her hair back to kiss her forehead.
“How many times do I have to tell you to leave the chores to me?” He demanded, fingertips digging into her sides. Tickling her fiercely. YN shrieked, laughter pouring from her mouth as he continued his attack. Finally, he relented, swinging her close to his chest, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “You didn’t ruin anything, sweetheart. I like it better this way, anyways. Besides, you snoop too much for your own good.”
“I wasn’t snooping!” YN protested, her fists smacking his chest. Bucky made a noncommittal noise, lifting an eyebrow in disagreement. “I wasn’t! You should clean your pockets out before you leave pants lying around if you don’t want me to look through them.”
“So… you were snooping?
“Shut up, Barnes.”
He laughed, a real belly laugh. Deep, harmonious notes echoing around them. YN grinned, pleased that she had been the cause of the beautiful sound. Bucky’s laugh faded out, leaving the residual smile on his lips as he studied her face. Eyes lingering over her features, the mirth in the blue tones even more joyous than the smile.
A somber shadow cast over his face for a quiet moment, fingers brushing over Yn’s skin softly. He cupped her chin, tilting her head back so all attention was focused on him. Thumbs brushing gently over her cheekbones.
“It was only a proposal if you say yes. Otherwise it was just a really embarrassing ramble that should be forgotten immediately.” He confirmed, giving a sharp nod. YN snorted, breaking the settling seriousness. Of course he would think she would say no, it was Bucky Barnes she was dating.
“Hold that thought! Wait right here,” Bucky quickly retracted his hands, making sure she stayed in her spot. Then, he sprinted up the stairs, thunderous footsteps shaking the banister. “I wanna do this right!”
“It’s on your dresser!” YN shouted after him, laughing as she heard him searching the bedroom. The broad grin on her lips made her cheeks ache, even when she bit down on her lip. She couldn’t tamp down the excitement bubbling in her chest.
“I’ve got it- I’ve got it!” Bucky declared, stumbling down the stairs before skidding to a stop in front of her. He wore a giant triumphant grin, blue eyes bright and shimmering with delight. He appeared so much younger, lighter. She couldn’t even begin to fathom the happiness he felt in that moment. “Okay. I’ve got it.”
Bucky took a deep breath, slowly exhaling as he stared at her. Her grin only fueling his own. His metallic fingers made a quiet clinking noise as he twisted the ring nervously between them. Biting down on his lip, Bucky sank to one knee, stomach erupting into butterflies all thumping into his chest, disrupting the beat of his heart.
“YN, you wanna marry me?”
YN laughed, meeting his eyes. Big, blue, gazing up at her like she hung the stars that reflected in the sapphire hues. He could’ve asked her to jump off the roof and with that look, she would’ve done it in a heartbeat. No questions asked.
“Yeah… I do, I really do.” She nodded, a nervous chuckle capping the end of her words. Bucky let out a loud whoop, leaping up to his feet, tackling her into a hug. Lifting her from her feet, spinning the pair around joyfully. “You didn’t think I’d say no, did you?”
“No comment.” Bucky replied, hoisting her up higher. YN’s hands fell to Bucky’s face, cupping his cheeks and squishing. “Alright, enough of that Mrs. Barnes.”
“Not yet I’m not.” YN teased, shimmying her hips to adjust her seat against his chest. Bucky increased his grip as they wobbled unsteadily. Fingers digging into her thighs. He surged forward, pressing a dizzying kiss against her mouth. Distracted by the feel of her fingers running along the nape of his neck. His feet began moving them toward the staircase instinctively, desperate to feel at ease. To feel at home. “Hey- I made you dinner.”
“I’ll eat it cold.” He clutched her tightly against his chest as he began jogging up the stairs. Taking them two at a time. YN laughed, nails digging into the thin cloth of his t shirt. Bucky reveled in the melodious sound, grinning as they reached the top. He could feel the ring indenting against his back, something he never thought he would feel. Never even considered until her. Now he could only pray he could hold it close until his dying breath.
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Synopsis: You are a shapeshifting mutant that has an alter-ego of a cat. Bucky is a quiet man. Cats like quiet places. Probably a good match.
Themes: Fluff, slight angst
Warnings: Mentions of trauma, Bucky's past, death
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!reader
A/N: I'm treading chapter by chapter lmao uni life is so hectic I can barely find time to check my tumblr but thank you for those who like my stories still! Btw, this is another chapter, I hope y'all like it! As always if you like the story please leave a like, an ask, a reply, or a reblog! TIA! ❤️
You groaned and cleared your throat. The first rays of the sun slithered through the small space inbetween the curtains, the light seeping warmly into your skin. It was a good sensation, as always. You opened your eyes and blinked, your vision focusing in and out. Taking a deep breath, the lull rising of your chest caused you to feel the heavy limb draped on your tummy. It made you smile.
Pivoting your head to the side, you saw Bucky's sleeping face. Small puffs of warm breath escaped his parted lips, fanning across your temples and forehead. You smiled wider. He looked peaceful, like an angel. You were almost tempted to wake him up to see his blue eyes. You had been used to seeing it by now the moment you wake up in mornings and before you sleep at night.
It had been about two months since you both had a mutual understanding. You knew from the get go you wanted to be with him, as he wanted to be with you, too. Everything was smooth sailing with him, and the team was happier to know about the unspoken thing between you and Bucky. You remember so well of Sam's incessant teasing and Nat's as well. Both of you weren't able to escape them for like a week, if it wasn't for Steve admonishing them, you knew they wouldn't stop.
Only a few minutes later, you felt Bucky stir from beside you. You heard him hum under his breath, felt how his metal arm hugged you tighter and pull you closer to his body, and how he murmured as soon as his nose buried on your hair. All those years you've lived—wandering and searching about, the only other time you had felt serenity was in his arms. And you never wanted it end.
“Mornin',” came his groggy voice. It tugged on your chest in the best way, “beautiful, as always.”
You chuckled and shook your head, “Are you trying to charm me early in the morning, Barnes?”
“I could be,” he teased, his lips making contact on your temple. “I know you like it.”
Your chuckle turned into a laugh and Bucky gladly listened to your laughter, his heart filled with the best kind of warmth. “You're a total charmer.”
He hummed once again before planting a deep kiss on your lips, slowly draping his body over yours. Bucky placed both his elbows on either side of your head, fingers tenderly caressing your scalp. You were almost out of breath when he broke the kiss.
“How 'bout we take a morning walk? Sun's up,” he smiled, “thought you might like getting sunlight and all that.”
You reciprocated his smile, “I like that.”
“What are you doing?”
Bucky asked, his eyeballs darting down to the side, watching the graceful movements of your hand. He felt the warmth of the golden light graze his temple. “What are those?”
“Flowers,” your fingers pushed through the locks of his hair and a flower materialized on top of the shell of his ear, “symbolizes the beautiful thing that is your mind.”
Bucky had been sitting with you for almost half an hour since you both decided to take an early morning walk. No one was awake yet and everything around you was peaceful. The sun has shone quite boldly already and you took it to your advantage to create a flower crown on Bucky's head.
You noticed how Bucky quieten after what you said, you know too well by now what's inside his head.
“That wasn't you, Bucky.” You sighed, “Whatever they made you do, wasn't you. It wasn't your fault. And it will never be.”
“But I still did it...” his voice was low, “didn't I?”
You took a deep breath and exhaled, looking straight to his eyes right after. Even though you had completely healed his mind, the memories of his past still clung to him. It refused to let him go because he was the one who shackled himself into its claws. He can't let it go.
“Yes, you did.” You blinked and turned your head to one side, “Though you had a choice not to, you still did. You pulled the trigger. You pushed the knife through a person's flesh. You took lives. But you have to remember, you didn't do it because you wanted to. But because it was the only thing you could've done at the moment,”
“You didn't know who you were, Buck. You didn't even know who Bucky was. Who James Buchanan Barnes was. They took him away from you for all those years and used you to their advantage. You never felt like a person, a human being. Only a machine of destruction and death.” Bucky listened intently to your every word, as though it was his lifeline. “You may have a moral consciousness inside you, but that meant useless since you have lost your self-identity. Maybe for you at that moment, killing every hit was the only thing that gave you sense of purpose or a sense of semblance to yourself. You grappled so hard to remember who you were since Steve wasn't around to remind you that biggest and most important piece of you.”
Bucky was still silent, digesting what you had said. Maybe, maybe he was the worst. Maybe it was true he never deserved a second chance in life. But there you were infront of him, looking and staring at him with all the care in your eyes. And he thought maybe, since you saw the light in him—he could believe there was something good in himself, too. That maybe he isn't so bad, after all.
“No one can undo the past, not even me, Buck.” You smiled at him, touching his hand—both flesh and metal, “But we can move on. Do better. Be better. We owe that one to ourselves. To the self you have lost for almost a century.”
He nodded, the tears accumulating on the sides of his eyes. “You always know what to say.”
“A perk of being an old maid.”
He chuckled, curling his hand into yours. “Still beautiful, though. You're the wisest person I've ever known.”
“And you're the most beautiful and interesting human I've had the honor to ever come across,” you grinned, caressing the flowers on his head, “I'm lucky to be here with you.”
The day went on and you and Bucky were stuck doing the same usual thing whenever there wasn't any spare missions for either both of you. For Bucky it wasn't just another day, though. Each day he could spend with you was a date. Even if it's just you two prepping coffee, or making omelette, or watching the same TV shows over and over again. It wasn't just familiarity that made him head over heels for you. He knew he had found a safe place in you, and as selfish as it may sound, he wanted you all for himself.
Bucky plopped the pillow into its rightful place and fixed the sheets when you told him you were to go to the adjoining bathroom. You had been feeling the insisting ache within the region of your chest for almost a week now, and you had to excuse yourself from Bucky to hopefully discern it wasn't what you thought it was.
As soon as you closed the door, you spread your arms and opened your palms, a faint light illuminating the corners of the bathroom. You created a barrier around you, so Bucky couldn't hear the noise if ever there would be.
You stared at your face in the mirror, though with the barrier present, your reflection was clear. Breathing hard, you pushed your opened palm on your chest—your form changing. The orbs of your eyes shone a gold light, and you saw the streaks of the same light piercieng out of your chest.
You felt how your heart sank. It was happening again.
No. Not now. Not when you finally found something worth holding on to, a person who has been the rest and calm you were longing for billions of years. You had warned yourself. And yet you didn't listen.
But you knew better. You had to go. You knew what was to happen if you don't. And not only Bucky would have to pay the consequences if you were to be selfish for love.
Love. What a word. You love him. You never thought a day would come and you would actually adore someone in your pitiful existence. The sensation was unlike any other you'd experienced. You had felt rage, loathing, and mercy. Nothing prepared you for something so human yet an unparalleled force you never saw coming.
The light from your eyes died and so did the one from your chest. For now. It'll only grow even more evident as days would go by. Until the day you'd dissolve into nothing but a globe of light—reuniting with nature once again to keep balance.
A knock took you out of your trance, making you face the closed door.
“Babe?” came Bucky's voice, “is everything all right?”
You immediately took down the barrier you created minutes ago and finger combed your hair. You faked a smile but more for yourself.
“Yes,” you replied, reaching to open the door, revealing a worried Bucky, “I'm fine. Everything's fine. Let's sleep?”
He snaked his hand around the small of your back and pulled you to his chest. Bucky closed the bathroom door for you and walked you with him afterwards, with you falling beneath him on the mattress.
“Good night,” he murmured, dragging the sheets to cover both your bodies.
The look on his face clenched at your heart. But you did your best to smile back at him.
@austynparksandpizza @hersilencedscreams @winterwhore @nickangel13 @lucymfer @ajeff855
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You are safe with me · Bucky Barnes x reader
A/N So this one was requested by @caritobbg, I really hope you like it dear! Enjoy my sweet sugar cubes!!!
TW: anxiety attack/astrophobia, mild language
It was a normal day in the tower, everyone was minding their own business. You were walking down to the lab as Tony asked you to check up on some prototipes.
As you were walking down a hallway, you were too focused on your phone to notice the person that was walking in the hall too until you bumped into them, making you look up from your phone only to be met with a pair of blue eyes staring down at you.
A sheepish smile appeared on your lips as you noticed you had just bumped into none other than Bucky Barnes himself, but what made the situation more awkward was that he was holding you tightly, the moment you bumped into him, Bucky held you from the waist in an almost instinctive movement and the fact that you just realized the position you two were in made your cheeks paint with a fade shade of pink.
"I'm sorry, Bucky. I should have paid attention to where I was walking."
He cleared his throat, letting go of your waist as you took a step backwards, as he was now aware of the situation you both were in.
"Yeah, no problem, (y/n)."
He sent you a small smile, making butterflies fly in your stomach wildly. The two of you smiled at each other, before continuing your journeys through the hallway.
This was how your relationship with Bucky was. A friendship that was supposed to be more, but neither of you gave the first step. The feelings were obvious, perhaps too obvious to your liking but there was nothing you could do regarding what your heart screamed at you about Bucky Barnes.
Two days later, you were in the kitchen, making yourself a nice cup of tea when suddenly, Clint entered the place too. He seemed to have just been training as he was wearing his usual sports clothes and he was sweating heavily.
He said, barely glancing at you. You hummed in acknowledgement as he walked past you and towards the fridge. Taking only a moment glancing inside it before he took out a coke.
You didn't pay attention to him as you continued to sip on your tea but it took only a second before you turned to look at Clint as he suddenly spit the coke out.
"What the fuck is this?!"
He exclaimed, you eyed him curiously, not sure as to what he means but before you were able to ask, you heard someone laughing from the kitchen's doorway. Turning to look at the source of the sound, you saw Sam leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed over his chest as he laughed at Clint's reaction.
"Why did you replace my coke with soy sauce?!"
Asked Clint, clutching the bottle in his hand as he was now angry at Sam for another of his pranks.
"Why did you substitute the cream filling of my oreos with toothpaste?!"
Asked Sam, mirroring Clint's tone as he stepped further in the kitchen.
"Hey, don't put that on me! You made me think my phone was broken when in fact it was just transparent glue!"
Agued Clint, they were going to start bickering back and forth and before Sam could say something back, you said.
"Stop! Both of you! You two behave like children, for god's sake."
And with that, you left the kitchen still carrying your cup of tea with you.
Clint and Sam looked at each other for a whole minute before the both of them smirked to each other. As if thinking the same thing.
"You know, I think we should give dear (y/n) a tiny scare."
"Sam, I was thinking exactly the same."
It's been two weeks since you found Clint and Sam in the kitchen and now, you were heading towards your room to retrieve some technology you left there last night.
Suddenly, your phone started ringing. You looked down at it only to notice it was Bruce who was calling you.
"Hey Bruce, do you need anything?"
You asked through the device as you stopped walking
"(y/n), hay. Could you come to the theatre please? There are some new sound devices I'd like to try and... well you'd help me a lot down here."
You sighed slightly before answering.
"Okay, fine. I'll be there in a minute."
And with that, you hang up. Now heading towards the small theatre the tower had. You actually didn't know why there was some kind of movie room in the tower but you put the question aside as you stepped out of the elevator and walked towards the room Bruce asked you to assist him.
Entering the place, you noticed a huge screen at the end of the room and you also noticed it was completely and utterly dark.
You asked, walking further into the theatre. However, as you were approximately six feet from the entrance, the doors closed shut, making a loud thud echo around the room. You jumped at the sudden noise before turning around, looking at the now closed doors.
You pulled at them to open but they were locked from outside, or that's what you guessed. Suddenly, the big screen at the end of the room flicked on.
Checking your phone, you cursed under your breath when you saw you had no-signal. But what made your blood run cold was the sudden voice that spoke from the screen.
'Jupiter is the largest planet in the Solar System...'
Oh no. Oh no, no, no... you thought as your eyes got glued to the screen. You felt the panic rising within your chest, sweat started to form on your forehead, cold sweat that made a shiver run down your spine.
Your breathing got ragged, it quickened. You wanted to run, shut your eyes, not hear a thing yet you were rooted to your spot. You were frozen in fear as you saw images of planets and stars.
Tears rolled down your cheeks but you weren't capable of turning around, weren't capable of keeping the panic at bay. Your phone slipped from your fingers as more fear crawled at you. The oxygen you were breathing didn't seem to register in your mind as you felt like suffocating. As if something was pressing your lungs together and the oxygen didn't get further than your nose.
And in that moment, the only thing that you felt despite the panic, despite the tears and rapid breaths, was that you felt hopeless.
Bucky was walking down a hallway towards the lab as he wanted to see you. He finally found the courage to confess and he wasn't going to waste another second so, with long strides, he walked to the lab where he knew you spent most of your time.
However, curiosity washed over him as he saw that you weren't in the lab as you used to at this hour of the day. So, Bucky decided that maybe you had gone to your room. Turning around, he began his trek around the tower to go to your bedroom.
As he was passing the kitchen, he noticed Clint and Sam laughing at something Bucky didn't pay attention to. Until your name came to the conversation.
"(y/n)'s been there for a couple of minutes, mate. Maybe we should go and tell her it was all a prank."
Said Clint as he was holding a beer in his hand. Sam waved at him dismissively and said
"Nah, let's wait a little longer."
Bucky made himself noticed by the two men in the kitchen before he asked with urgency in his voice.
"Where 's (y/n)?"
Clint and Sam looked at each other before the latter answered.
"In the theatre."
The simple response was followed by the both men bursting out laughing, leaving the Winter's Soldier more confused than ever.
"She's... how do I put it... studying."
Said Clint with a smirk dancing on his lips before he took a sip from his beer. Bucky knitted his eyebrows together at the confusing words of his colleague.
"What do you mean by studying?"
Sam snorted and said nonchalantly as he glanced at his wrist watch.
"Oh you know, physics, mathematics... astronomy."
Bucky said as he raised his voice when he heard the word 'astronomy'
"You remember that day when (y/n) said something between the lines of 'I hate space'? Well we did a simple, innocent prank to her in the theatre. Nothing to worry about."
Panic rose in Bucky's chest at Clint's explanation it took him just a second to make his body move from his rooted place on the kitchen's floor. He sprinted towards the emergency stairs of the tower, thinking that the lift was just too slow to get to you in time.
As he was running down the stairs, your words of a conversation you had with him echoed in his mind.
I have an anxiety disorder... It's called astrophobia. I'm practically scared of everything regarding space... I just... I hate space.
Bucky arrived at the theatre of the tower, despite his breathless state he ran towards the door. He tried to pull them open but they were locked.
He said under his breath as he needed to get you out of there as soon as possible. Bucky knew how bad a panic attack can be and he didn't want you to suffer that kind of anxiety, that feeling of hopelessness.
With a deep breath, he kicked open the theatre's door before entering the dark room. The screen was still displaying images of space and stars but Bucky gave it no attention as he was fully focused on finding you.
He called while walking down the aisles of the theatre but when he was at the middle of the stairs, his eyes widened slightly as he saw your figure on the floor, limp and pale.
Fear pumped into his veins as he sprinted down the remaining stairs until he arrived next to your body.
Bucky kneeled beside you, he turned you around so you were now lying on your back. Your hair was sprawled on the floor while your face looked ghostly pale.
"(y/n)? (y/n), wake up. Wake up, doll."
He tucked a piece of your (h/c) hair behind your ear, before his hand came to your cheeks. Bucky noticed your flesh was wet with your tears. Tears of fear and panic and there was nothing he wished but to have been there for you.
He realised you had reached your breaking-point regarding stress that was too much, causing you to faint. He couldn't bear to think how stressful it must have been for you the moment the images started to appear on the large screen.
Bucky sat you down, leaning you against his chest as his arms held your shoulders from behind. He pressed a kiss on your forehead deciding to take you back to your room, not wanting you to wake up in the gloomy and dark theatre. To make you panic once more, to make you experience such awful emotions all of a sudden.
With little effort, Bucky slipped his other arm under your knees before he stood up from the floor with you lying limply in his arms. He walked out of the room with long strides, this time deciding to take the lift back up to your bedroom.
Meanwhile, in the kitchen, Clint has just finished his beer when suddenly, the lift ringed making him as well as Sam turned to look in its direction only to see Bucky walking swiftly carrying you in his strong arms effortlessly.
The pranksters looked shocked at the sight, guilty even but Bucky didn't even spare them a glance as he walked past them as Clint and Sam watched as he carried you away and towards your bedroom.
Your eyes opened slowly only to notice you were in your room. Confusion washed over you for a few seconds until memories of what had happened at the theatre came back to your mind making you gasp slightly as you sat down on the bed.
"Hey, it's alright, (y/n). It's over."
You turned to look at the source of the voice only to notice Bucky standing next to your window. He walked towards you and sat on the bed too, in front of you.
Tears filled your eyes as you recalled the panic and fear you felt in the dark room. But the dark fog that was your thought was chased away when you felt Bucky's rough hand against your cheeks as his thumb wiped away a tear you didn't even notice it escaped your eye.
You whispered to him, making him smile at you, a small smile that made butterflies appear in your stomach.
"It's okay, love. You are safe with me."
Bucky said before he engulfed you in his strong arms. You nuzzled your face in his chest as you breathed in his calming and masculine scent.
You let your panic fade away as he cradled you firmly yet with delicacy, as if you were a porcelain doll which you were. You were his precious angel, the only person he had held strong feelings for. The one he needed to protect and love.
"You scared me down there, (y/n/n)."
His words made you lift your head, looking straight into his blue eyes that seemed to hold the world in them. You didn't say anything back, you just cherished the intimate moment with him.
"I love you, (y/n)."
You felt how your heart nearly jumped from your ribcage at his confession of love and you could only smile up at him.
"I love you too, Bucky."
This time, it was his time to smile as he pressed his forehead into yours, gazing into your (e/c) eyes before he leaned slightly, you also leaned to him ever so slowly so as to make the moment more magical, longer if possible.
His lips met yours in a sweet kiss, it was returned by you instantly as your lips moved in sync with his but you couldn't help the warm feeling that sprawled from your chest to the rest of your body.
You felt loved, cared for, wanted, needed, but most importantly, you felt protected. You felt this thanks to none other than Bucky Barnes himself.
A/N Thanks for reading my sweet sugar cubes!! Stay safe and remember that you are loved and appreciated :)
Want to be add to my taglist? You just have to ask me and I'll gladly tag you :D
Taglist: @starryeddie @the-uncoordinated-house-cat @demented-potions-master
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lost and found - the epilogue
set in the lost and found universe - catch up on the rest of the series here!
the last part of the series
hi hi !! i can't believe this series finally got over lol i still remember writing the first part
thank you so much for all the support on the story, i am eternally grateful <333
i have two headcanons scheduled to go out in the next couple of weeks, so stay tuned for that!
the car stopped in front of the shop.
bucky eyed the front door nervously.
‘bucky,’ you said, rubbing the pad of your thumb along his cheekbone, ‘what’s the worst that can happen?’
‘i don’t know.’
‘look, you need the company. you can’t just sit at home, all alone, watching the television.’
‘i read too!’
‘it’s not enough,’ you said. ‘don’t you feel alone?’
‘no,’ he said in a small voice, looking down at his lap.
‘well, what do you want me to do?’
‘i want you to come in with me and choose a dog to bring home!’
he rubbed his temples. ‘what if the dog doesn’t like me?’
you chuckled. ‘the dog is gonna love you.’
‘you don’t know that.’
he narrowed his eyes at you. ‘fine.’
the two of you headed back inside the shop. with you regaining your degree and starting work as a professor at a nearby college, bucky was left all alone at home. he was doing an online course from a community college so he could get a job soon, too, but he was still alone. and no matter how much he said it didn’t bother him, you knew it did.
and that’s what brought you to the decision of adopting a pet. back when bucky and you were dating, he had loved dogs. surely one couldn’t stop loving dogs, for whatever reason.
the door made a chiming noise as you pushed it open. bucky looked around the shop from where he was standing in the doorframe.
‘hi, there!’ the woman at the counter said.
‘hey, we’re the barnes? we called ahead,’ you said, pulling bucky into the shop.
‘right, of course. feel free to take a look around,’ she smiled.
you gave bucky an excited grin, and he tried his best to return some of your enthusiasm.
you walked over to the golden retriever that seemed pretty excited to see you. he was trying to get his snout out through the bars of the kennel cage, and when you crouched down, he seemed to be going ballistic over trying to lick your hand.
‘hey, boy,’ you said, caressing his snout, and getting your fingers licked in the process, ‘what’s your name?’ you fiddled around for a name tag on him.
bucky kept his distance. it wasn’t that he didn’t like dogs, it was just that they could be a little unpredictable, and they had so much energy. it scared him a little bit.
but he stared at you, and he felt a small smile grow on his face. he would never be able to get used to the fact that even though you had been put through hell and back in the distant past, you still were happy almost everyday, about the littlest things even.
as he softly laughed to himself, he felt a little bit of pressure on his shin. when he looked down, he noticed a white entity.
it seemed to be curling and twisting around him. a cat. what was a cat doing in a rescue shelter for dogs?
the cat stopped rubbing herself against his shin, and started pawing at his knee, almost as though she wanted to be held by him.
bucky stood there for a minute, in confusion, looking around the shop to check if anyone was watching. then, gingerly, he picked the cat up.
she meowed softly, and jumped onto his shoulder. bucky froze a little bit, but he didn’t take the cat off.
he could hear her purring.
‘buck— what?’ you said, laughing a little. ‘is that a cat i see there?’
‘uh,’ he craned his neck the best he could, ‘maybe.’
‘wow. i didn’t know cats were here.’
‘dear lord,’ the woman he had seen previously at the counter said, bustling towards them. ‘that’s alpine. i’m sorry about her. she causes a lot of trouble here.’
the woman proceeded to the take the cat, alpine, off of bucky’s shoulders. bucky found himself missing the light weight.
you stood up and walked towards the woman. ‘i didn’t know there were cats up for adoption here too.’
‘oh, no, there aren’t. but she’d always been lingering outside, and didn’t seem to want to leave, so we took her in.’
‘oh,’ bucky said. there was a strange, alien instinct in him that made him want to ask for the cat so he could cuddle with her again. her fur was very, very, soft. ‘is she up for adoption?’
you gave bucky an amused look.
‘with the influx of new animals coming in every day, we wouldn’t be opposed to the idea of her getting a new home.’
bucky turned to look at you.
the woman smiled knowingly, and started walking away from the two of you. ‘i’ll come back in a minute.’ she then suddenly stopped in her tracks, placed alpine in bucky’s hands, and walked away again.
bucky’s mouth moved to a lazy smile as he played with cat.
‘what are you doing?’ you said, a laugh lingering in your words.
‘we could get a cat,’ he said. ‘what’s the difference?’
‘i didn’t know you liked cats.’
‘i like this one,’ he said. he then redirecting his attention to you. when you narrowed your eyes at him, he said, ‘oh, come on. you’re the one who said i should fix my loneliness or whatever.’
‘i— i did. i just didn’t know the fix would be a cat.’
bucky looked at you, his eyes glimmering with hope. ‘please. look at her. she’s adorable.’ the cat looked up at you, almost as though she could understand what the two of you were talking about. her pupils dilated until there was nothing but a thin blue rim, and a relatively wide black circle. ‘how can you say no to this face?’
‘for the record, i do know what you’re doing.’
bucky held the cat up, and moved her paws around. he started talking in a high pitched voice, ‘please, please, please?’
‘how dare you,’ you said, amused. ‘i can’t believe you would use a cat to lure me into your trap.’
‘well,’ bucky said, lifting alpine so she could rest on his shoulders, ‘i am. whatcha gonna do about it, y/l/n?’
‘evil. sheer evil.’ bucky smirked.
you walked back to the dog — lucky. ‘i kinda wanted to take this guy home.’
‘you can take ‘em both,’ the woman said. she had appeared suddenly. when she registered the look of surprise on your faces, she clarified, ‘it’s just a suggestion. we don’t really have a limit on how many animals you can take home.’
you looked over at bucky. he shrugged. ‘anything you want, doll.’
you grinned. ‘alright, then.’ lucky must have understood your conversation, because he let out a little howl and started pacing around restlessly in excitement.
‘he likes you,’ the woman noted.
🕰 🧺 ☁️ 🐇 🗡
~ a few weeks later ~
‘i’m home,’ you called out. it was late afternoon, and you expected bucky to be sitting in the living room, on the couch, watching television.
you walked into the kitchen, because what if he’s making dinner early? empty.
you walked into the laundry room. nothing. slowly, you walked up to the bedroom.
pushing open the door gently, you saw bucky sleeping on the bed, his mouth slightly parted. alpine was cuddled on his chest, and lucky was sleeping next to him, tongue slightly peeking out.
at the sound of your footstep, lucky sat up.
you tried to shush him, but bucky’s eyes opened up rapidly at the shuffling beside him. consequently, alpine woke up too, and hopped off of his chest.
‘hey,’ you said. ‘what are you guys, uh, doing?’
‘jesus christ,’ bucky said, as he wiped the corners of his mouth. he must have drooled a little in his sleep. ‘what time is it?’
‘um, five in the evening.’
‘i promise i didn’t mean to sleep for that long.’
‘how does something like that happen?’ you chuckle, sitting beside him.
‘well, you see,’ he began, ‘i was going to take a small nap after lunch, and as i was waking up, alpine sat on my chest. i sure as hell couldn’t take her off, because she was sleeping, and then—’
‘—and then you fell asleep waiting.’
‘wow. good for you, barnes.’
he laughed, and then released a small sigh. ‘i like this.’
‘you like what?’
‘the normal-ness. i never get used to it, ironically.’
you chuckled, and leant forward to place a small kiss on his nose. ‘boop,’ you whispered, as you lowered your mouth towards his.
he kissed you. ‘boop indeed.’
thank you so much for reading! feedback is so, so appreciated! <3 please do not repost my work on any platform. reblogs are fine!
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