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#but ESPECIALLY with the one that is the LEAST likely to crave human affection
punkpandapatrixk · 3 months
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Full Cold Moon in Cancer ♦︎ Moon Magick Pick A Card
Happy New Year~!🍀It’s January already but, gosh, aren’t we all still preparing for the spring equinox this year🍓That’s when the real new year begins, aenergetically~🎍
The Full Cold Moon on 26th December carried a theme surrounding Home and Hearth. It touches on our IC (Imum Coeli) and 4th House in our natal chart. The IC tells us who we are when no one’s watching, and after we become super clear about that, it helps us realise what kinds of company are legitimately good for our sense of belonging in this mortal world.
Your IC can literally shed light unto the reasons you feel alone and separated from the people around. The Full Cold Moon in Cancer—ruler of the 4th House—invites us to take a look at our sense of familyship whilst being incarnate on Earth.
People on this Planet have been struggling with an immense sense of loneliness since the introduction of social media; isn’t that strange? How is it that the more people we’re able to connect with the more miserable we feel on the inside? Well, isn’t it clear that social media has helped us become more aware of what’s truly FAKE when it comes to human connections?💍
Our IC deeply craves real familial connections. Moving forward, wouldn’t you rather entertain soul-based friendships that really care about your wellbeing as a Human being? This Cold Full Moon in Cancer, you’re invited to once again die to everything and everyone that doesn’t make you feel seen, heard, respected, or wanted👻
Fake connections, whether online or offline, can go fuck ‘emselves🥢
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☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
Pile 1 – The Choice to be Free Has Always Been Yours to Make
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i d e n t i t y – Knight of Pentacles
Others may think you are mad, but you of all people know there is method to your madness. More than everybody else gives you credit for, you’re actually somebody who’s very strategizing. You are careful with your plans and you think very many things through before you execute your plan. Others simply do not understand this mechanism in your brain because you’re quite unique, quite unorthodox even. This Full Cold Moon, you are invited to ponder if the source of your misery is actually other people’s beliefs about you rather than your actual incapability.
Just because you’re following a strange path of your own doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong. Weirdos throughout history have changed societies for the better. We should all be thankful to weirdos—and especially, WITCHES. Did you know that WAY TOO MANY of our advances in science and medicine were actually done by witches? They burnt and hanged the witches and took credit for all of their hard work. Tsk tsk tsk… I raise my cup to all y’all witches who’s working to blast open new pathways for the rest of Mankind🍸Keep doing you. Keep going because spring will surprise you with loads of delights~🍬
s e r e n i t y – Queen of Pentacles Rx
You’re a helpful soul, that much is apparent. But you’ve got to learn some discernment so that you don’t get taken advantage of very easily. What the Queen of Pentacles in reverse is trying to show you is that, unfortunately, too many people in this world don’t even deserve to be helped. Not by you, at least. Unless you’re getting paid for rehabbing messed up people, let them deal with their own mess and grow up from it. Ultimately the Queen of Pentacles Rx is cautioning you against letting messed up people in your inner circle because these types of people are gonna bring their mess into your Life.
You get to decide, with your skilled discernment, who’s worth helping, fighting for; who’s worth keeping because they give you just as much affection. If, in order to keep serenity in your world you must look like a stingy bitch, let it be. Be selective with who you give your time and money to. Make sure you aren’t sucked dry of spiritual aenergy yourself. Your Higher Self and team of Spirit Guides are saying, this whole winter you’ve got shit to manifest—big, big shit. Preserve your precious aenergy so you can manifest real, long-lasting results~!🌳
f a m i l y – 8 of Cups Rx
Having said all of that, this card is saying: don’t easily walk away from things and endeavours that you know from deep within your heart matter. I think you’re so dreamy and floaty that you could have a hard time being realistic when it comes to the physical manifestation of your real desires. You could think, since they’re unrealistic, you might as well give up and choose to focus on other more pragmatic pursuits. If you must leave, leave the people and environments that don’t support your heart’s desires—don’t leave the desires and end up becoming very unhappy with yourself! After all, with your already methodical mind, you actually have all the power in you to bridge your dreams to Reality.
That’s why, honey, the freedom to be free has always been in your mind. Now you’ve just got to make the right decision—what kind of freedom is real freedom to you? The freedom to choose to kowtow to societal expectations or the freedom to walk your own path no matter how lonely (at first)?
‘If you end up with a boring miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it.’ – Frank Zappa
full moon self-care🔻🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘
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☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
Pile 2 – Art and Romanticism Have Always Been an Important Part of Your Heart
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i d e n t i t y – 9 of Cups
You have many dreams, but if there’s one thing, you’ve always dreamt to be independent, doing your dreamy things in your dreamy space. I think you’re the kind of person who’d be considered a quiet eccentric. You have many interests and hobbies, and you’re quite sensitive about having your me-time uninterrupted. I think you could erupt if someone walks in on your serious activity and startle you or if someone in your family tells you to go and do something in the middle of your reading. That kinda vibe. You’re quite a loner, actually. You’re super weird tho XD Do you maybe identify as an autistic kid, fam?
Anyway, please know that this Full Cold Moon is inviting you to ponder more deeply about your place amongst Humans. I have a feeling you don’t really like Humans or at least, you find human interactions absolutely exhausting, for the most part. If you know this blog, you know already how much I prize individuality and being alone if it means peace of mind and faster manifestations LOL BUTT!! In this reading, I’m getting that many of you may want to ponder yet again how you interact with people, especially those closest to you because sometimes, there really are people who care about your wellbeing more than you realise.
s e r e n i t y – 10 of Cups Rx
Many of you choosing this Pile probably haven’t got a nice family background. Of course, there are a million scenarios for each person but for the most part, I sense that you’ve felt familial connections to be emotionally unsatisfying. That’s why you seek emotional fulfilment in this multitude of hobbies and interests. Clearly you’re a very intelligent person, that much I’d like to iterate. And so, this reading seeks to validate your feelings about your eccentricity.
Art and all those dramatic things have always been integral to your sense of identity. I really think you should indulge, as long as whatever dramatic things you enjoy aren’t detrimental to your mental or physical wellbeing. If you happen to be the type that’s already doing detrimental things in your pursuit of an emotional high, this card is suggesting you pause breathe and eat before you go after another round of pursuing that high.
f a m i l y – Page of Cups Rx
When you’re pausing, you can cry. Accepting our emotions and acknowledging that they make us Human usually comes with a sense of grieving for all the ways we’ve thought ourselves as being in the wrong. There’s not a thing fundamentally wrong with you, it’s the people around you that have made you feel like you can’t communicate with them with striking vulnerability. And if these experiences have caused you to bear a lot of dark thoughts or negative emotions, I’d like you to know it happens to the best of us.
You could literally turn your pains into art, if anything. If you’ve chosen this Pile as your main pile, know that the pain you’ve experienced through human connections could be turned into art and that your Art has the capacity to heal those who come into contact with its backstory. And this, totally will have a significant place on the world stage because, as you can see, human interactions in recent years have gotten weirder and weirder in some capacity. So many people are hurting from getting disappointed by the…government and celebrities? LOL
full moon self-care🔻🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘
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☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
Pile 3 – Princess Kaguya, Is That You?
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i d e n t i t y – 2 of Cups Rx
At the core of your being, you’ve always been different in that your heart is a lot purer, your morality is criminally significantly higher, you’re compassionate and can empathise with people on a level that’s beyond the comprehension of most others. The way you’ve experienced this Human Reality is incomparable to what most others have known. Basically, you’re an alien! And that’s an incredibly modest thing to say about you.
What you genuinely wish to see manifest in this world is vastly more high-vibrational than most people would even care to think about. I hope you accept that you are genuinely such a good person when you’re in your best element. What’s really difficult to maintain is your faith in people, for the most part, because you haven’t really met anyone who’s capable of giving their heart to you as deeply as you’ve given yours. This whole experience has broken your spirit and faith in a lot of things.
s e r e n i t y – 9 of Pentacles
And thus, you’ve carved out a Life of your own, quite separate from most people you’ve ever known. I’m sure you’ve burnt a lot of bridges up until just recently, and I sense, many of you simply know there’s still a few more to burn going forward. This is your confirmation that you’ve done the right thing. In this Human world, too many people buy into the idea that to be good is to be social; but you’ve experienced firsthand that that’s often not the case. You know firsthand that many people’s demons get activated by some weird connections to other people’s demons. And you don’t like that.
So you made a decision to walk away from most aspects of social life and worked your butt off to polish your skills. Some of you have spent many years studying; some of you have spent very many months working on a glow-up; some of you have deepened your spiritual prowess and connected to higher realms; basically, you’ve died and become a ghost… Springtime will bring you the resurrection you deserve, bitch!🎍
f a m i l y – King of Cups
About your Soul Fam though, I feel that travel is highly indicated for you. Some of you, you could be meeting a Soul Fam member during travels, but for the majority of you, this aenergy is giving the idea that you’re literally meant to travel the world or live abroad, perhaps even for the rest of your lives. Highly advanced souls can often have a narrative in which they’re expected to die on a land different from the one they were born into. So, if you’ve been thinking of moving to a different country or state, this is your confirmation that it is indeed part of your soul scenario.
Thanks to modern travel, it’s so easy for highly advanced souls to connect with their true Family members from different countries and that’s something we’re glad about LOL If you’ve ever wondered whether you’re going to die alone and sad, that’s totally not the case. If anything, you have so many Soul Fam members who are going to be just as highly spiritual, profoundly dreamy and vastly empathetic as you are. You’re going to be very glad when the time comes for Soul Families to reunite in the upcoming couple of years~ YAY~!
full moon self-care🔻🌒🌓🌔🌕🌖🌗🌘
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☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
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gatorbites-imagines · 18 days
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I love reading your work, could you do the Moonboys + Khonshu (if possible) with a touch starved s/o? 💜🩵💙
Moonboys and Khonshu x touch starved male reader
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I miss the moonboys. I still hope they make another season,,,
I believe in softer Khonshu, I’m ignoring how hed really be in canon.
Marc Spector
I imagine Marc is just as touch starved as you are, he just doesn’t like to be open about it. He doesn’t like to be vulnerable like that, which in the end just makes him more touch starved.
So, when you start cuddling him more, holding his hand, always being near him and touching him in some way. Then he would tense in the beginning, but soon he would start melting into the touch.
It starts small, like him letting you grab his hand, and Marc intertwining your fingers. Or when you guys are sitting on the couch watching a movie and you lay your head on his shoulder, Marc would rest his head against yours.
Little by little he would start opening up, the more your relationship develops, and trust is built. I don’t think he would say it with words, but Marc would start to be more physically affectionate in different ways.
He never turns away any of your searches for touch, part of him melting little by little, until he feels all gummy and vulnerable on the inside, and Marc just finds himself curled up and holding you, feeling at peace.
Steven Grant
Like Marc, Steven would also be touch starved. Maybe not to the same extent as Marc, since Steven is aware of himself and his feelings to a deeper degree. He gets stimulation from other places, so its not that gut deep yearning the others have, but it’s still present.
So, when you start leaning on him, always touching him, or hanging onto him, Steven doesn’t mind. He especially loves it when you hug him from behind when he’s doing something, be it reading his books or when he’s puttering around the kitchen.
He almost melts if one of your touch searching behaviors is kissing him, be it his lips, his cheeks, his forehead or his hands, or pretty much anywhere. Steven just loves it so much it almost makes his heart burst.
Steven would also be the only one to go out of his way to verbally tell you he doesn’t mind you being touch starved, or how much you crave touch in some way. Just to make sure you are aware that he doesn’t mind, and you don’t need to hide it from him.
Jake Lockley
Do I even need to say it? touch starved. But hes the type of touch starved where he feels pain when you touch him, at least in the beginning. As the one that took most of the physical abuse for the system, Jake has a different relationship with touch.
So, in the beginning when he notices how touch starved you are and how you always want to be touching them in some way, he might go out of his way to switch with Marc or Steven.
As your relationship develops though, Jake slowly warms up, much slower than Marc. Its always small touches, like hooking your pinkies together when walking, or him brushing his hand through your hair.
He would be tense when you need hugs, but after some time Jake would allow it because he loves you. And by extension, Jake would start feeling better when it comes to human touch.
Hed never be as affectionate as Marc or Steven, at least for a very long time, but he goes out of his way to reassure you in the ways you need, to make sure you get your needs met and don’t feel neglected.
Khonshu
Unlike the moonboys I don’t think Khonshu is touch starved. As a god I don’t even think he really craves physical affection the same way we do. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t like it, but the craving isn’t as big for him.
When it comes to you being touch starved, I think Khonshu would just go along with it and let you cuddle into him, or lean on him, or whatever else you need to do.
He would love to run his hand through your hair though, his deep voice making a comment every now and then, comparing you to a cat or some other affectionate cute animal.
Khonshu wouldn’t go out of his way to tell you in words that he understands you are touch starved and that he doesn’t mind. He just shows you it doesn’t bother him, by holding you when you need it, or cuddling you to his chest when you have that yearning for touch.
And since very few people can see him, then he is always able to be near you and touching you. No one is gonna see the bird skulled giant following you around with his hand on your shoulder anyways, so why not.
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leathfaic · 1 year
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gaz and ghost's relationship is super interesting, we don't really get anything on it except for the fact that they seem to know each other (there are cutscenes they're both in in warzone and gaz pulls ghost up as they escape the prison).
and i think in the beginning that's about it. ghost being ghost he knows the man, works with him and isn't super pissed off because kyle is a competent sergeant. like most his relationships with lower rank.
gaz probably thinks the lieutenant a little eccentric with the whole mask and redacted everything bit he has going on but in the end the results of his work are what matters and they are frighteningly good.
he probably tells soap the little he knows about ghost before they get sent out to al mazrah, tells him the man is cold, scarily efficient and a bit weird but values good work. maybe even tells soap that he's not sure if the friendly approach is the best here, just keep it tactical and professional.
that alone is enough to make soap double down on it of course.
but when ghost and soap get together that's when things start to go sour between them. both have their reasons both rational and emotional. gaz is worried for his best friend, doesn't want him to get hurt in a relationship with someone as emotionally stunted as he thinks ghost is. he doesn't really think ghost deserves someone like his brilliant loving friend. and frankly free time at base is limited and he used to spend all of it joined at the hip with soap who is now dedicating a meaningful portion of that time to ghost too. especially in the early days of the relationship it takes a toll on him.
ghost for his part notices the animosity, is scared for that new and wonderful thing he has with soap because he knows gaz has a significant influence on soap. and especially at the beginning he really craves all of johnny's attention and affection. doesn't like the way soap is physically affectionate towards gaz as well and insists on spending time with him alone sometimes. he has yet to learn to trust in this new relationship. and trust really is an issue with him.
and soap? soap is probably just done with them both.
sits them down together and explains that he loves both of them and refuses to lose out on either relationship because they both decided to be idiots about it.
they don't have to like each other but he demands them to at least keep acting professional for his sake. but also if they both want more time with him they'll have to suck it up and spend time with each other too.
in a rare moment of agreeing with each other both gaz and ghost find that they'd both much rather brawl it out, but johnny is not having that, it would get so much worse if one thought they'd "won" this whole thing. so he gently reminds them that he's a human being not a toy being fought over and neither of them can really say something because rationally they know they are being assholes right then.
soap's dictated peace starts of super tense, two men tolerating each other like two big cats that are forced to close. and in the middle soap who acts like nothing is wrong, who's the sole reason that they are both so tense and at the same time keep grinning and bearing it.
in the field its worse, because that's where rank really comes into play which is not healthy in their dynamic. especially once gaz starts dating price and they get into a weird rank deadlock. but neither of them is willing to escalate. because that would make soap sad and that's the one thing they can agree on not to let happen.
so they keep tolerating each other. keep working together. keep helping each other in the field thinking "fucking hell can't look soap in the eyes if something happened to this idiot."
eventually it shifts from not making soap sad to making soap happy. ghost brings takeout from a quick trip outside base and brings some for gaz too because hanging out with him makes soap happy. gaz plans something fun for the weekend and to make soap happy makes sure it's something ghost can also come to without feeling too uncomfortable.
and soap loves it so much both his beat friend and his partner can't help but share his happiness. it's infectious.
so they get to know each other and slowly come round realise that the only threat to their relationship with soap is their relationship with each other. thus it progresses back to its neutral starting point and then steadily becomes more. they spend too much time with each other not to become friends. not that they would admit it. yet they laugh at each others jokes and sometimes even find themselves accidentally hanging out without soap.
both of them are so offended when they find themselves realising it, how the fuck could that even happen? and then soap waltzes in. who's been even happier ever since they started behaving themselves normal around each other again. soap who's love is too strong for them to stay enemies about it so instead they just accept that they never really had a chance to do anything about it but become friends.
some manly huffing noises are made and then they get on with it because soap decided its movie night.
price adamantly keeps out of it, even once things with gaz start happening. won't even talk about it except with soap when they both need to blow off some steam. i could probably (and might) write an equally long piece how that affects them all.
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confusedraven1 · 7 months
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Hi!
I read your post about the Good Omens 2 kiss. The kiss, which wasn’t a romantic gesture per se, but Crowley’s desperate attempt to make Aziraphale stay, make him understand what Crowley himself only allowed himself to realize after Maggie and Nina talked to him.
That in mind, do you think there will be a second kiss in s3? Given that it wasn’t a romantic gesture, is there the need again for such desperate actions like kissing?
Tbh I’m always quite confused when it comes to Aziraphale & Crowley and the need/ the desire of displaying physical affection. I know there is love, friendship and thousand of years between them, but when it comes to human things like kissing, hugging etc. I’m not sure if they ever want/ need that as a way to show affection.
I don’t believe that the season 2 kiss was just a means to an end, and therefore needs no repetition, but a part of me fears that this one heart breaking kiss is all we will get.
Sorry for this mazy message. I think I just want to know if you believe that there will be second kiss, and this time a happy one please.😭
hello! thank you and congrats, you’re the first person to ever ask me a question on here! 🥳
obviously i’m not 100% certain, and i fully trust neil and everyone else working on the show to do what makes sense for the characters and their growth, but i personally hope we get another kiss!
true, they don’t need to have anything physical between them to express their love for one another—we’ve seen it over and over and over again throughout history, even before history! they do not need to kiss or hug or even hold hands for us to know they’re in love. it’s very frustrating when people say that, especially after the s2 finale and after neil has expressed it time and time again that this is a love story.
[tl;dr: although aziraphale and crowley don’t need to show affection physically to know their own feelings and each other’s, i think the way the story and character arcs are going makes a second kiss seem very likely]
physical affection is a very human thing, something that the angels and demons don’t crave or need.
BUT. they also don’t need, and generally don’t crave, food and drink, yeah? throughout both seasons, aziraphale and crowley are the only ones from both heaven or hell (that i remember) that are seen eating and drinking.
aziraphale eats because it brings him pleasure. he indulges his cravings and relishes in the joy he gets from them, a very human thing. the only time we see him go overboard with it is the first time he eats: when crowley offers him the ox ribs. aziraphale doesn’t get full because his body doesn’t need the sustenance, so he just keeps eating, not knowing how to stop and making a mess. over time, he learns temperance in earthly desires and refrains from overindulging. he allows himself to enjoy more and more of humanity and what they create simply because he enjoys it. he finds pleasure in food and drink and theatre and magic and books and music and so many things that would never have existed if humans didn’t also indulge in their pleasures.
conversely, we only ever see crowley drinking, never eating. it’s possible that he’s tried human food before, but he usually sticks to alcohol and coffee (and that one time with laudanum), beverages that alter your state of mind at least a little bit. he doesn’t seem to get pleasure from them, though. it’s like he either drinks to be social with aziraphale, to drown his sorrows/give himself a boost of energy, or out of habit/appear more “human” to blend in. crowley doesn’t let himself indulge, finding joy in his few earthly possessions (his plants and his car, things he takes care of but also has some control over), being near aziraphale, and just generally being a mild nuisance to humanity.
in season 1, although aziraphale clearly likes crowley and being around him, we don’t see him “indulge” physically with him. in season 2, that completely changes. they’re both free from heaven and hell, and so punishment from fraternizing, so aziraphale begins to explore what indulging in pleasure is like with the one being he can’t imagine ever parting from—through small touches, dancing, even just looking at him. aziraphale is so fucking ready to allow himself this one pleasure he’s denied himself since the creation of the universe: to openly love crowley in any form he can.
in season 2, crowley is still a little…stuck (he’s living in his car. not ideal for him or bentley. or the plants). he’s so used to not allowing himself to indulge and is probably a little frightened over this sudden freedom he has, so he almost lives vicariously through others: following aziraphale around with his own projects/duties and trying to get maggie and nina to fall in love. it isn’t until nina tells him that he and aziraphale look to be “together” that he realizes, “wait, does he like me, too? we look like a couple??” he keeps it in the back of his mind, sees gabriel and beelzebub go off together, gets that pep talk from nina and maggie, and thinks, “fuck it, we can do that, too, cause we want to and not just out of self preservation.” he’s about to communicate what he wants and allow himself the pleasure he’s been keeping at arms length or more for thousands of years.
SO, i think, keeping in mind everything we’ve already been shown about aziraphale and crowley, and their personal relationships with themselves and pleasure, it’s highly likely that another, hopefully more passionate and romantic kiss will happen in season 3. obviously a lot will have to happen before then, but aziraphale knows what he wants and has so much practice in discovering new pleasure and enjoying it that i think he wants to have some degree of physical relationship with crowley. he didn’t forgive him for the kiss, or act like he didn’t like it, because he didn’t want it (he would’ve probably pushed him away if that were the case); he was upset and hurt and angry that was how it was done. crowley has much less practice and the kiss is the first time crowley let himself indulge, but it’s devastatingly overshadowed by his desperation and frustration with aziraphale.
just like aziraphale couldn’t stop himself from eating the entire ox, crowley couldn’t stop himself from kissing aziraphale, no matter how messy it got.
anyway, i love the idea of crowley learning to indulge in the things he wants to and finding pleasure on his own and then aziraphale helping him even further 😊
(aka they should kiss and fuck about it)
(and if they decide it’s not for them, then that’s good too 💜)
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sunhated-a · 3 months
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Okay I got more questions…. (hope I’m not annoying you in any way. I’m the same guy who asked the nihilists question.)
This is more directed to muzans canon backstory.
So a observation, since one of narcissisms root causes is also being emotionally neglected as a child, i think that muzan was never giving enough emotional attention by his parents or anyone really.
But did he ever think about his past and know that he was abused in someway? Or did he just surpass everything about his times as a human that aren’t useful? Or did he just ignore it since it was a long time ago and he thinks it doesn’t really matter at this point?.. or does he not care about it?
Hello anon, I'm glad to see you back! And please, don't worry about annoying me with questions like these, I adore them. They are a huge reason why I made this blog so feel free to come and ask anything whenever.
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NOW! To answer your question. For canon Muzan? I absolutely think you're onto something there. I don't know about diagnosing him with Narcissism as a personality disorder. NPD is a very complicated and extremely misunderstood disorder that should be approached with empathy and care. However! He does display some of the traits of what we colloquially call narcissism.
I think Muzan deludes himself into thinking that perfection is his own escape from his past. The way it reminds him of weakness, but the way that he forcibly makes his demons dependent on him does indicate a need to be needed, and his demands to be worshiped by them definitely comes across as someone who deeply craves attention, love and respect. To be seen as perfect in their eyes and nothing less. The way that lack of control over a situation or one of his demons will lead him into a rage, to the point that he is exacting and utterly merciless.
It all leads me to believe that he is deeply affected by his human life.
I went back to the extended flashback scene that we were given in the anime recently. And while Muzan did live in lavish conditions (especially for the time) and was surrounded by servants, we never actually saw any of his family members. We never really saw a scene between himself and his mother or father, or his siblings, or much of a relationship between him any anyone really. So it's not too much of a reach to say that he did suffer from emotional neglect, or some sort of abandonment. Which would explain his resentful and hateful feelings towards much of the world.
Now why he seemed to face this abandonment-- if at all-- is still up in the air. Maybe his parents just weren't sure how long he'd be alive for, maybe they didn't want to get attached, maybe they sucked, maybe they're dead. It could be a lot of factors there.
I think that while canon Muzan remembers his past with stunning clarity, he engages with it with the same cold logic he does with everything else. If he has some resentment towards his family, he doesn't seem to show it. Didn't even mention them whenever he narrated his own story.
I, however, think Muzan's past affects him deeply still. He just doesn't show it. Or at the very least, in an outward way. He's far too fixated on his future to really think back on his past, and the person that he once was. Maybe he isn't even aware of how neglect and abandonment has affected him because he shows a lack of introspection throughout the series, especially when it comes to his relationships to others.
But we do see him display a deep fear of abandonment at the end of the manga, which I won't get into detail to avoid specific spoilers, but if you know you know.
But it lends credence to the idea that Muzan never had any substantial relationships.
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wickedsrest-rp · 26 days
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Name: Victoria "Vic" Larsson Species: Vampire Occupation: Stay at Home Mom / Window Painter Age: 310 Years Old (Looks about 30) Played By: Julie Face Claim: Alicia Vikander
"Sooner or later, everyone sits down to the banquet of consequences."
Some people weren’t meant to be parents.  In 2024, if Vic had been a fool who tried therapy, that’s what one of the quacks would have said.  They would patronize her about childhood, telling her that father’s constant, persistent dismissal of her wasn’t her fault.  Maybe they would ask that she try and grant him grace.  After all, plague-ridden Sweden in 1714 wasn’t peaceful for anyone, especially a man with a dead wife and a stubborn daughter who refused to conform.
But that would’ve been bullshit. 
She didn’t remember when her desperation for his affection flipped to apathy, but before long, she was married off. Never did Victoria think that ego and pompousness could be so entrenched in one disgusting human, but she was learning quickly that life had its way of surprising her.  Victoria hated feeling like she belonged to someone, and some childish piece of her assumed that feeling might go away once she was out of her father’s grip.  It didn’t.
But marriage did have a perk. One that exuded a brightness so strong that Victoria couldn’t deny, not even to a quack 2024 therapist, that she would have picked a marriage to her husband over anyone else.  Because where her husband was a deep, dark boil on the ass of humanity, his sister was the opposite: a constant light, inching its way deeper into Victoria’s heart the longer they spent together. There was always a reason to smile around Lyra, and what started as an innocent fascination turned into an intense entanglement.  Victoria had never felt this way about another person, nor had those feelings ever been reciprocated.  
She should have expected life ripping her away.  But she stupidly got herself caught up in the flurry of it all- the way Lyra made her feel electric with just a touch, or how a simple walk together could make her feel on top of the world… Everything made sense, until it didn’t.  There was no warning before it happened- Lyra never grew cold, nor did she give any indication she wanted what they were doing to stop.  Maybe that’s why her betrayal cut so deep.
Victoria never knew the circumstances that led to her execution.  There was no trial, no chance to plead her case.  No chance to question what was happening..  But there, inches away from death, Victoria was grateful to be done with life and all the bullshit that came with it.
But life loved to play tricks on Victoria. Most of the people who came to watch her die left quickly, satisfied that she was gone.  As soon as Victoria was sure she was leaving this life behind, there was a sudden, sharp pain in her neck, and someone urging her to drink, and she was ushered into another form of entrapment.  
Victoria held a deep resentment for her sire, despite her guidance and adept training.  She was just another being determined to hold her down, and from the beginning, she was the enemy.  Her sire, instead, seemed amused by Victoria’s unwillingness to conform, but this would be her downfall. After years of calculated planning, Victoria got rid of her swiftly and violently, venturing alone after that.
Being a vampire wasn’t easy. From the moment she turned, she had a deep sense that vampires were the truest evil in the world.  The thoughts running through her mind, the fantasies of murdering people in cold blood, the cravings-... it was all too much.  It wasn’t long after gaining control that she decided she needed to destroy anyone who shared her …condition.  The best way to do this, of course, was betrayal.  A victim herself, Vic knew the best ways to destroy vampires: lure them, gain their trust, and turn them to slayers when they least expect it.  There was no counting how many vampires she’d betrayed, unless you counted the sum of money she’d acquired doing so. 
Victoria, now strictly referred to as Vic, found her way to Wicked’s Rest ten years ago, thanks to a tip from a hunter. Normally after that amount of time, she’d find new horizons, but Wicked’s Rest  was a goldmine for her.  She never planned to stick around for so long. It just happened.  It was easy, after a while, to let her guard down.  What started out as a few acquaintances with neighbors or patrons from the bar she worked at quickly developed into friendships that caused her to question everything she believed about the world for centuries.  Soon, Vic was a total wreck, and she’d stopped trying to destroy vampires altogether. 
But the most undeniable turning point in Vic’s journey came one unexpected night when a pair of old friends (hunters she met when she’d first arrived in town) knocked on her door in desperation.  When she reminisced about that night, it was a blur. She could barely remember all that transpired: A bounty on their heads they couldn’t escape from.  No family or friends to care for their baby… And then suddenly, Vic hailed as the solution.  Her first answer was no, of course.  There were numerous ways it could’ve gone wrong, numerous ways to lose control. 
Vic knew more than anyone that some people weren’t meant to be parents.  Least of all her, with her apathy and impatience and general disdain for society.  But before she could realize what she was doing, Vic agreed to take the baby in.  
If living in Wicked’s Rest made Vic go soft, motherhood practically melted her, at least in regards to guilt about her past actions.  Now, Vic was determined to right her wrongs.  Her main efforts went into joining the neighborhood watch, misleading anyone who might have gotten even a whiff of vampire activity. She was still leery about being around other vampires, especially letting a now three-year-old Rosie anywhere in their vicinity, but for the first time in her unlife, she began to feel like she was where she belonged.
Character Facts:
Personality: Scrupulous, resourceful, patient, cynical, vengeful, calculating
She still holds a small job to keep up appearances, but most of Vic's acquired (and quite large) net worth is from her former years trading insider information about fellow vampires and their whereabouts and secrets to hunters
Vic has a deep love of painting, and she spends most of her spare time perfecting the craft. Most of her paintings are of her memories of the flower garden that was planted by her mother back in Sweden.
Vic has a bracelet from her time as a double agent that, when activated, hides her vampire status from slayers for 5 hours. It’s getting old and has the tendency to malfunction, and she’s desperate to find someone who might be able to fix it or secure her a new one soon.
Vic bought her Rottweiler, Winnifred, about 5 years ago, both to act as a guard dog and a threat to those who dare try to speak to her.  No one warned her that Winnie would be the friendliest dog on the planet.
Vic is proud that her adopted 3 year old daughter, Rosie, is bilingual, loves the minions, and has impressive color theory for someone her age.  Vic WILL gloat about her parenting skills whenever the opportunity arises.
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leffee · 4 months
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Foxy headcanons that are sooo self-serving and completely opposite to how most people potray him and I guess opposite to his "canon" personality (also he's an animatronic here but one that can do human stuff like eating because I said so):
a classic, but of course he has a tail. Long as hell, this thing drags behind him if he doesn't keep it upright. Basically, his tail is as long as he is tall or so. Another headcanon that is obviously not true, but the reason he has no tail in the first game (or any other for that matter) is that he had one, but you saw how torn and worn he is? Well, just like he has holes in his suit, his tail simply fell off due to whatever reason he's like that
speaking of height, he is the shortest of the gang as he should be. Like at least a head shorter. Freddy, Bonnie and Chica on the other hand are all the same height (I have no problem with them being different heights, that's just personally how I always imagined it)
his on stage persona is in complete opposite to his actual personality. That also counts for his entire pirate act along with his pirate talk and accent, that only exists for the performance, as soon as he's finished he talks completely normally (though due to the force of habit sometimes he unconciously sneaks in some pirate talk when he doesn't need to)
so basically his personality is shy and unsure of himself, but can be quite mischevious and playful if he's around someone he knows well, so namely and mainly his fellow animatronic
aside from his pirate stories and occasional other pirate-themed activities, he's available for pets when he's not performing. It's not an official attraction xd it's just something that happens. He's also most fluffy from the animatronics at Freddy's, especially his tail and the top of his head
looong ears, honestly almost as long as Bonnie's, they're a bit wider tthough. By default they stay upright, but they can be droopy too and then they just kinda dangle
really enjoys pizza, will happily eat any left-overs from the guests, could not care less if the slice is already bit, he's eating it. Some kids seeing that, even bring him pieces themselves
loves all his friends dearly. Bonnie is his fellowe introvert, so they often relax together, sometimes just laying next to each other not exchanging words at all, but can also talk for hours. Freddy is his captain, and Foxy is really relieved that they have a sort of leader figure. It's so calming that there is someone, who is not him, that keeps and eye on everyone and everything. Chica, oh boy, she's really affectionate and he, though shy, craves affection, so they can be all over one another. In a way, he's most comfortable with her. He's her little fox, child, brother, and her husband all at once
I am cringe but I am free. This should suffice for now but I have more
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lolahauri · 2 months
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˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ Nothing But Trouble
Ship: Housewife!Nina Hopkins x Businessman!Jeff The Killer
Type: Smut, Ship Fic, One-Shot, F/M, Fluff Ending.
Contains: height difference (6'3/5'2), size kink, edging, overstim, multiple o's, spanking, hair pulling, dirty talk, praise & degrading, breeding, oral (m receiving), finger fucking, p in v sex, dacryphilia.
Words: 4.1k
Requested?: Yes.
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“Ughhh…” Nina groaned out of boredom as she laid on the couch, listening to the clock tick away. It was becoming painfully repetitive. But she’d finished her housework and errands hours ago, there was nothing left to do but wait for her husband to return home. And even though she already knew he wouldn’t be in the mood for her clinginess today, that wouldn’t stop her from pouncing on him the second he stepped past the front door. 
She was feeling especially needy today as well. It’d been nearly 4 weeks since they’d last been intimate in any form. For some that’d be normal, but for Nina, it was torturous. She was used to them being able to have sex at least once a day, followed by a night of cuddling and kisses. That was until Jeff got promoted at the office 6 months ago. Since then, the affection and love-making had slowly dwindled in frequency, until it became nonexistent as of now. And any attempt on Nina’s part to initiate resulted in him pushing her away and saying he’s too stressed, and needs to focus on the companies current project.
Nina had a plan though. The sexual frustration had been building up far too long for her liking, and her own fingers were no longer providing her the relief she craved so bad. So tonight, she was going to do whatever it takes to get her husbands attention.
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bzz bzz. 
Nina immediately perked up at the sound of her alarm. It was 4:50, Jeff should be home in about 10 minutes. That gave her just enough time to get her first little surprise ready. 
She quickly jumped off the couch and jogged down the hallway to their shared room. She felt the heat already beginning to spread through her stomach, from both excitement, and the thought of her fantasies she was hoping to come true tonight. While walking through the room to her vanity, she had already begun taking her long, wavy hair out of the signature high pony she’d usually kept it in. The shiny black waves cascaded down her back like a waterfall, and perfectly framed her face. 
“Hehe…” she giggled to herself a bit while picking up her striped makeup bag, pulling out some items she knew Jeff loved. Cherry vanilla perfume, black eyeshadow for a smoky eye, and a lip tint that suspiciously resembled human blood. Quickly she began the smokey eye with her right hand, and swiped on some lip tint on with her left. Butterflies started swarming her lower stomach, there was only about five minutes left before Jeff was due to pull in the driveway, and her mind was quickly filling with sexually charged images while she finished her makeup and spritzed the perfume on. 
Her favorite little fantasy she’d been dwelling on all day was the thought of him bending her over his desk, completely dominating her from behind. Longing to feel his big, strong arms wrap around her petite frame, brutally fucking his throbbing cock in and out of her. Nina squeezed her thighs together tightly, hoping to find some sort of relief from the aching arousal spreading through her already wet pussy. It was really starting to get unbearable, but there’s no time to get herself off now. It’s already 5:00pm, Jeff would be home any sec- 
She heard a car door slam outside. He was right on time. 
“Aw, shit, shit shit!” Nina got up as fast as she could, discarding her hoodie as she ran down the hall, revealing a spaghetti-strap black sundress underneath. It was flowy and loose at the bottom, but hugged her curves and cupped her tits perfectly at the top. Sundress season was Jeff’s favorite season. So this combined with the perfume and sexy makeup should surely stop him in his tracks.
The arousal and anxiety were infecting every inch of her body now. Each of his heavy footsteps down the walkway and across the porch sent a shock through her nervous system. Finally the doorknob started turning. She made a last minute adjustment to her dress and stood in front of the door, nervous laughter threatening to spill as it creaked opened. 
Jeff opened the door and went to make the first step inside, his towering frame and cold aura were already dominating the energy of the room. Man, he looked sexy too. She never got tired of the way his dress shirt clung to every muscle on his arms and torso, making him look much more buff than he actually was. She also loved that his pants were just a bit too tight in the crotch, leaving a slight bulge visible. God, how she wanted him to take her right then and there. But she had take it slow for now.
“Hiii, honeyyy~!” Nina drew out the end of her words, greeting him in her usually cheery voice, while simultaneously tackling him into a tight hug. “How was work, babe? I missed you sooo much!” She giggled and looked up at him, praying he would notice her appearance change and have some sort of reaction to it.
“It was fine. I need to go finish this PowerPoint, let me know when dinners ready.” Jeff sighed, his voice monotonous and husky, clearly uninterested. He glanced down at her briefly, before slowly removing himself from her grip and walking away, not acknowledging her outfit or makeup in the slightest. She watched him walk to his office, which rested just a couple feet away at the front of the hallway. A disappointed look covered her face for a split second, but she quickly brushed the troubles away and stuck to her plan.
“Okay… next idea then.” Nina whispered to herself as she walked to the kitchen. Tonight she was making baked spaghetti and meatballs with garlic toast, just like his mom used to make. Surely that would soften him up a bit. 
The meal was easy enough to make, and pretty quick. Which gave her more time to daydream as it cooked in the oven. Her fantasies had now shifted to the thought of blowing him under the desk. She could see it so clearly. Him sitting there, working on his laptop, trying to not get distracted by his cock-drunk wife licking and sucking every inch of him. She imagined how she’d wrap her small hand around it, stroking up and down at a torturously slow pace just to tease him. She imagined cupping his full, taunt balls in her hand. Playing with them just the way he liked while she swirled her tongue around his tip, which was already leaking precum at the sight of her lewd actions. She imagined - 
Ding!
Nina was quickly snapped out of her daydream as she heard the ovens timer go off. She sighed and took the dish out, setting it on the stove as she went to make a second costume change. Tiptoeing past Jeff’s office door, she pondered on what she’d wear. Until it hit her, she knew just the sexy little outfit she needed to grab his attention.
She was standing in front of the closet now, stripped completely naked as she searched for the garments she needed. “Ha! Perfect!” She whisper-yelled out loud, the excitement sparking in her yet again as the tossed the clothes on the bed, making sure it’d look nice put together. Finally she started putting on the outfit, trying to stay quiet as possible as she giggled to herself. 
The nerves were building up again, her heart was pounding while she plated Jeff’s dinner. At first they were nerves of fear, fear of being rejected. But the more she thought about the situation, the nerves turned to electric shocks of excitement. It felt like they were playing a game almost, she’d never experienced this sort of chase before. Usually men, Jeff included, were immune to her seductive ways, eagerly giving in the second she wanted sex. She was actually kind of enjoying this though, she felt like a predator animal hunting it’s prey. 
She took the plate and began walking to his office, gently knocking on the door “Honeyyy, dinners ready!” drawing out her words again and shouting in her usual hyper manner. 
“Come in.” Jeff yelled back, still maintaining the annoyed tone he’d been sporting for months. Nina walked though the door confidently, setting his plate down next to his laptop. 
“I made your favorite, baby~” She spoke in a flirty voice while leaning over his desk, accentuating her ample cleavage. 
“Thanks, hone-” He looked up and was cut off immediately, not by her though, but by himself becoming distracted. He eyed her for a second, taking in the outfit. She wore a low cut, cropped tank top and black booty shorts. The shirt being just showy enough that he could spot the edges of her red lacy bra underneath, it pushed her tits up perfectly. As he looked lower he discovered something even more eye-catching, thong strings matching the color of her bra were pulled above the waistband of her low-rise shorts. 
His gaze continued to travel further south, soaking in the sight of her pale, plump thighs being beautifully put on display. He couldn’t deny the fact that he desperately wanted her right now. He wanted to take her in every position she asked. He wanted to hear her cry out his name between moans and whimpers. He wanted fill her to the brim with his cum, and watch it pour out of her sweet, sweet pussy. He wanted her in every way.
But there was no time for that. He cleared his throat, forcing himself to focus back on his work. “Uhm, thanks...” he said as plainly as he could, not wanting to encourage her teasing, he had a project to finish after all. But even if he tried to hide it, Nina knew exactly what he was thinking. And she’d already come this far, there’s no way she give up now. She demanded his attention and she was going to get it no matter what. 
“Sooo, Jeffy, how's your project goin’?” She kept her playful, oblivious act going and she walk around the desk, sitting on the edge. The positioning of her lower-half did not go unnoticed by Jeff. He watched from the corner of his eye, her shorts tightening around her hips and ass as she sat down, followed by her legs crossing over one and other, showing them off even more. Fuck, this was getting hard to ignore… 
But yet, he did. He ignored the way the crotch of his pants also seemed to get tighter. He ignored the primal urge to fuck her senseless and breed her. He ignored the growing sexual frustration. “Hun, I’m busy. This is a big project, and i’m on a strict time crunch.” His voice was stern. He was trying his best to not lose both his focus, and composure.
“I know, i just wanted to check in with you, that’s all.” Nina’s voice was becoming sickeningly sweet, she knew exactly what she was doing, and he knew that too. 
Jeff huffed in annoyance, “Fine. It’s going fine, i’m halfway finished. Now please leave, i need to focus.”
“Aw, c’mon Jeffy, can’t we spend just a little time together?” She moved a bit closer, teasingly running her foot up and down his leg. 
“No, get out.” His voiced was raised a bit this time, shoving her foot off of him.
Bingo. She knows she’s getting to him now, it’s finally time to drop the innocent act. “Pleasee~” she whined, “i know you want it too, baby.” 
“Nina, stop. Get. Out.” oh, he’s pissed.
“Mm-mm” She shook her head and continued testing his patience as far as she could, slowly spreading her legs open, serving as a clear invitation. 
“Listen to me, Nina -”
Her voice dropped lower, letting a more combative, dominating tone take over “Why don’t you make me listen, hm? Show me who’s boss, Jeff.” saying his name with a hiss, she let a bratty smile take over her face, maintaining eye contact with him.
“You know what, fuck it.” he thought to himself.
Jeff swiftly shoved her down to her knees as he stood up, his strong build completely towering over her now. His voice was low and husky “Open your mouth.” 
This is exactly what Nina wanted, but being a pain in the ass is just too fun, she wanted to really get him going. The more angry he is, the rougher the sex. “Nope.”
“Open your fucking mouth, Nina. I’m not telling you again.” He’d already unbuckled his belt, she watched intently as he pulled his pants and boxers down just enough to let his cock spring free. 
“Holy shit” her jaw dropped, almost hypnotized by the sight. Suddenly aware of her own body now, she felt the aching pressure of arousal spread over her again. Her pussy was wet and throbbing, clenching around nothing. 
Without warning, Jeff shoved his cock through her parted lips, his tip hitting the back of her throat, which gagged her and forced her face to be pressed right against his pelvis. He let out a relieved groan, it’d been so long since he felt this. He gave Nina a moment to adjust before beginning to slide in and out, fucking her throat with a level of desperation he’d never felt before. One of his large hands was holding the back of her head, forcing her to take it all in. 
Picking up speed, he closed his eyes and let the pleasure fully take over him, fucking her mouth with perfect rhythm. He was hyperaware of every little sensation, melting into the feeling of her soft tongue sliding up and down his entire length, coating it in her saliva. 
Nina was trying hard not to gag. She started distracting herself by sliding a hand down the front of her shorts, teasing her clit through the thin fabric of her panties while Jeff’s cock was fully down her throat. She squeezed her thighs together, quickly becoming overwhelmed. Moving her panties to the side, she swiped two fingers over her aching clit and moaned immediately, sending a light vibration over his cock, pushing him closer to the edge, and causing a moan to come from his own mouth. 
It created a perfect cycle. Nina would continue toying with her pussy, moaning from both the heavenly pleasure, and her husbands noises. Leading Jeff to feel the vibrations against his shaft, and continue the pattern. 
She was quickly reaching her breaking point though, feeling an intense pressure build up in her stomach as her movements became shaky and irregular. “Mmph!” letting out a loud, gargled moan as she continued to choke on Jeff’s length, Nina felt the erupting pleasure of an orgasm spread through her, soaking her fingers in her own juices as she began to tremble from the overstimulation.
Jeff instantly took notice of this, looking down through half-lidded eyes, he shamelessly admired the pornographic sight being showcased just for him. He thrusted a few more times, watching closely as his cock slid with ease through his wife’s soft, plump lips. They’d only just begun, and she was already looking dazed and fucked-out, this’ll be fun. He let out a final sigh and removed himself completely, seeing a string of spit connect his tip to Nina’s mouth. She was nearly drooling at this point.
“Get up, you don’t think were done yet, do you?” His voice took a mocking tone and he reached down and lifted her off her knees and onto the desk, pushing everything to the side. “We’re just getting started sweetheart.”
Before Nina could even get a word in, he started stripping her, lower-half first, then her shirt and bra, leaving her completely vulnerable and on display for him. She shivered when she felt the cool air hit her soaking wet pussy. “Mm.. Jeff…” She whined, embarrassed about how long he was staring. 
“Don’t worry babe, i’ll give you what you want, kay? She nodded, giving him the go ahead to slip two fingers into her. Her breathe immediately hitched upon the sudden entry. He slowly began sliding the two digits in and out, watching her reactions the entire time. “How’s that feel, huh? This good enough for you, or do you want more?”
She looked up at him, wanting to tell him to speed up, but all that came out were pathetic whimpers and whines. “Use your words, doll.” his tone was dripping with sarcasm as he continued the painfully slow pace, occasionally swiping his thumb across her abused clit just to see her flinch and whine.
“Please- ah fuck,” her legs trembled at the sensation of his thumb again “please, go... go faster.” 
“Only because you asked nicely.” Nina wanted to argue back, but she quickly lost her train of thought when he began to pick up speed. His fingers were long, much longer than hers at least, filling and stretching her out in a way she couldn’t do for herself. Her head was almost spinning now, only get worse when Jeff curved his fingers upwards, finding that spongy spot on the top of her pussy and starting to abuse it relentlessly. Moans flowed past her lips like water, any attempt at speaking turned to gibberish as she became completely enveloped in pleasure, slowly being built towards her climax yet again.
“God, you’re such a little slut, i haven’t even put my cock in you and you’re already fucked out of your mind.” That was the last straw for her, hearing his words brought her to her second orgasm of the night, coating his fingers in clear fluid. Jeff didn’t stop though, he added a third digit to her tight hole, keeping pace while circling her clit. The overstimulation built up fast, sending electricity through her body as she squirmed and whimpered.
“Hah- holy fuck,” her body was shaking violently, she honestly didn’t want to stop, but it was getting overwhelming to a painful degree, “Mmm, Jeff! Ah- stop,  ‘s too much.”
He chuckled a bit and slowed down to a stop, watching as she attempted to calm down from the high and catch her breathe. After a few moments, she managed to regain awareness and ground herself back into her body. That didn’t last long though, for as soon as she opened her eyes, Nina was greeted by the sight of Jeff stroking his cock, looking right into her eyes as he did it.
Her eyes widened, glancing back and forth between his face and his manhood. She once again felt the painful throbbing on her clit, her body was exhausted, but her mind was racing with more dirty thoughts. How is it even possible for her to still be so horny? Nina’s thoughts were cut off by Jeff’s gruff voice. 
“Like what you see, doll?” continuing to stroke his cock slowly, throwing his head back a bit and groaning out loud. He was clearly enjoying himself. “Don’t be shy, tell me what you want.” He stated, now making eye contact again.
That only embarrassed her more, though. She looked away from his piercing gaze, a pink hue dusting her cheeks as she felt her face grow hot. He wasn’t going to let her shy away though, she was bold enough to interrupt him in the first place, she can be bold enough to tell him what she needs.
“Hey, look at me.” Jeff grabbed her face, squeezing her cheeks harshly as he forcefully lifted her head. He moved a bit closer, grazing the tip of his cock against her core. Both of them let out a pleased exhale as he continued to slide his length between her folds, bumping against her clit after every forward motion. “Tell. Me. What. You. Want.” He demanded between thrusts. 
Nina could barely keep her eyes open though, let alone form a coherent sentence. Her moans turned into high-pitched little whimpers, she was so needy for him it was pitiful. The way he slid his long cock between her lips was euphoric, but she needed more. She needed to be filled and fucked. She needed to be stuffed with his cum to the point it ran down her legs.
“Mmfph.. Please, Jeff.” she was moaning and crying after every syllable, grabbing onto his strong forearms as a way to stabilize herself. “God, please please please just fuck me, i need it so bad pleaseee.” He never got tired of hearing her cute cries and begs.
“Alright, i guess you earned it.” he smirked before quickly flipping her onto her stomach, face pressed against the desk. He stroked himself a few more times, loving the way her heart-shaped ass was being presented, before pushing himself into her tight hole. He’d barely gotten the first inch in and Nina was already a mess. All she could think about right now is how good it felt to have him stretching her out again. 
She nearly screamed out as Jeff suddenly snapped his hips forward, fully bottoming out inside her. They were both breathing heavily now, easily being worked up to their climax. He was determined to keep going though, he was practically edging himself already as he began to pound into her fast and rough, leaning forward just a bit to grab a fistful of her hair, pulling on it roughly. 
Nina was dizzy with lust, completely drunk on sex, and the way he was pulling her hair and slapping her ass wasn’t helping. She felt an especially forceful slap on her butt, soon followed by him grabbing it, kneading the flesh of her soft ass cheek. Her moans escalated in volume the longer this went on. He was hitting that sweet spot with every thrust in now, making her weak in the knees. Every fuck, grab, and hair pull brought her closer and closer to the edge, threatening to give her her third orgasm of the night. 
“You’re takin’ my cock so well, baby.” Jeff was huffing between words, so worked up, but not willing to break the rhythm he’d set. The room was being filled to the brim with lewd sounds now. Every second was occupied by Nina’s moans, Jeff’s grunting, and the sound his pelvis aggressively slapping against her ass. If heaven existed, this was it for them. 
Jeff moved his hand from Nina’s hair, slipping it underneath her body and finding her clit. She immediately cried out from the sensation, he was showing no mercy to her. “Come on, babe. Cum on this fucking cock.” he whispered to her while his two digits rubbed back and forth across her sensitive bud. 
Tears were spilling from her eyes as she came undone, screaming his name along with some other obscenities. The way her pussy was squeezing and clenching on his cock had Jeff building up to his own high. His thrusts were becoming sloppy and off beat. “Ah fuck, you want me to cum in you? Want me to fill you up good, put a baby in you?” 
Nina swiftly nodded, tears still running down her cheeks, smudging the makeup around her eyes. “Yes! Yes, please!” 
“Oh fuck-” He hips stuttered as he finally reached his peak, shooting his hot load deep inside her, painting her walls white with his cum. They were both gasping for breathe as he pounded into her a couple more time, making sure to stuff every inch of her. 
“Shit…” Jeff hissed, the cold air hitting his cock as he pulled out. Nina was still huffing and panting, she now felt their mixed liquids running down her leg, making a beautiful mess. He was enjoying the view of it all too, secretly hoping the sperm would take, and get her pregnant with his baby.  
After a few minutes of resting he picked her up, carrying her to the bathroom to clean up. Jeff ran a bath for her as Nina cleaned herself off with a warm towel. He turned to her, finally speaking up. “So, uhm, are you alright? I wasn't too rough was i?”
“Mm-mm.” She shook her head smiled up at him. "I love it when you're rough."
“Look, uhm… i’m sorry i’ve been so absent lately. I’ve just been stressed with work, it has nothing to do with you, you know that right?” Jeff looked nervous, i mean he wouldn’t blame her if she was mad, he would be too. He hoped that it wasn’t took late to fix things.
Nina put her hand on his shoulder, giving him a reassuring smile. “I know, Jeffy, it’s okay.”
“No, it’s not, i should be giving you more attention when i’m home.” He put his hand over hers and smiled back, “i’ll tell you what, i’m gonna call in sick tomorrow. Then we can spend all day doing whatever you want, how’s that sound?”
She gasped excitedly, jumping into his arms and squealing with happiness. “Really?! You’d do that for me?!” 
He laughed and embraced her, bringing her into a bear hug, “I’d do anything for you.”
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r0-boat · 1 year
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Thank you @smallestapplin for helping me write this one!
Maxie tries to refuse drinking from you for the longest time, he’s above his instincts! But he’s not the best at taking care of himself, his workaholic nature coming back to but him in the ass. You found him slumped over his desk, weak from lack of feeding.
It was the first time he fed from you, drinking you blood like it was the finest ambrosia. Now he tries to make it as romantic as possible, wanting these feedings to be as intimate as he can make it.
Now that he has a taste he can't deny that he craves it, it's because he feels close to you , and hunger all rolled into one. He constantly thinks about when's the next time you're going to let him have a taste. He's tries not to and honestly he hates himself for doing it. the only blood he'll ever drink from a person is yours ( well and people who threaten your life)
He hates that he can't go out during the day with you, wanting to take you on nice walks during nice sunny days. But this gave him an idea, now taking you on walks while he’s covered and carrying an umbrella just in case.
He loves finding a nice shaded tree to have picnics under. It’s nice to have a break from work and team magma.
You can’t do it all the time, but you at least stop by to make sure he eats.
Maxie feeds most of the time, off synthetic blood packets, but he can’t bring himself to pass up a chance to drink from you.
So it’s your only weapon against him, to make him take at least a break.
You have a messed up sleep schedule because of him, if you every want to spend time with him you need to be more of an night owl, but he’s usually working, so you need a sweet spot of late night owl and early bird.
He knows that humans need sunlight to be healthy. so when you do see him during the daytime he has shades. And an umbrella to keep himself out of the sun
Black out curtains are a must and stay pinned to the walls around the window, not only to keep sunlight out, but also because he doesn’t want anyone seeing him being soft with you.
With most affection, Maxie is still a private person. Maybe even more so because he's worried that his instincts would take over and he would hurt you. Especially if you first met him.
Speaking of, he likes to slow dance with you in private. Maxie will turn on some classical music, offering his cold hand for your warm one to grab, so he can twirl you around your home.
As a vampire he doesn’t really sleep, at least not for very long. But he enjoys resting with you as you sleep next to him, he really does, but he also hates not doing something.
You’ve walked into his office many times, blanket wrapped around you as you pout “you left me.” Before you flop in his lap.
Maxie sighs at this, but he won’t say anything, just letting you get comfortable before going back to writing.
The most you get is “you’re going to wake up with a sore neck, dear.” But you don’t listen, falling asleep with your head leaning against his chest, and waking up stiff.
He will have an arm around you, rocking you to sleep while he does his work. once you fully go limp he'll press kisses on the top of your head and smile before carrying you off to your shared bedroom.
He adores you, he wants you in his life for the rest of eternity, but he will never force you to turn. He will let you ask him, he will never ask you to be a vampire.
His heart will hurt if you choose either or, he thinks his vampiric side although granting him strength and immortality is a curse nonetheless and he could never be the one to turn you but humans have short lifespan. He'll miss you for Millennia even if he has you in his arms for just a blink.
But if you do wish to be one, he will make it as soothing as possible.
If not, he respect your decision, and it won’t be obvious how much it affects him until you’re on your death bed, and unaged Maxie at your bedside, refusing to leave.
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profoundbondfanfic · 1 year
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Another batch of our favorite aro/ace/demi fics!
Part 7
We're the New Romantics by almaasi [Teen, 8K, Aro!Cas]
“He’s so pretentious.” “Who is?” “Castiel.” Dean sneered as he said the name. “Look at him. He only brought one bag, and it’s tiny. And orange.” “Maybe he doesn’t like carrying a lot of stuff,” Charlie said, shouldering her own rainbow-coloured weekender bag, leading Dean out of the crowd and towards the picnic benches. “Gifted-and-Talented Summer Camp is only four days. A change of clothes and a toothbrush, that’s all most people need.” “What about when he sleeps? Doesn’t he at least need a pair of jammies? And that freaking nose ring. Seriously, he looks like a bull. I wonder if anyone’s ever told him.”
The Graveyard Shift by PurgatoryJar & riseofthefallenone [Explicit, 620K, Demi!Cas]
Dean’s favourite coffee shop, The Graveyard Shift, is only open after the sun goes down. Which is perfect for him, because that’s exactly when he craves coffee the most while doing the overnight at the fire hall. The coffee shop’s owner is pretty perfect too, but it’s kind of a bummer that Dean never gets to see Cas during the day. In a world where the supernatural live more or less in peace with the rest of humanity, it’s a little impolite to ask Cas just what he really is - or what his dark past entails.
hold me (just for tonight) by kitmistry [Teen, 1,5K, Ace!Cas]
Parties are always fun, and they come with the best tips.
Moonflower by K_K_TiBal [Teen, 18K, Ace!Cas]
Castiel is not a very good witch. He's just not. He struggles with potions, illusions, divination - everything that makes a witch respectable, and his familiar - Dean - definitely deserves better than him. When Dean falls under a curse that seems to affect his shape-shifting abilities, Castiel and Dean begin to run out of money, and Castiel decides the best thing they can do is go after a rare Moonflower to help get themselves back on their feet. The journey could be dangerous, especially considering Castiel's less-than-ideal abilities and Dean's curse, but with a little luck, it will all be worth it in the end.
Easy by mnwood [General, 911, Aro!Dean]
When Cas comes back from the Empty, it takes Dean some time to adjust.
Coming to Terms by Unforth [Explicit, 169K, Aro!Dean]
Naomi Novak has laid out her son's entire life. Castiel Novak-Shurley must get a great education, focus on business, ignore frivolous things, attend Harvard Business School, become an investment banker at International Angel Deposit Bank, maintain his virtue, marry a proper beta or omega, and make lots of alpha babies. Even when fitting her expectations was difficult for him, Castiel has done his best to comply. Until now. His mother is arranging a marriage for him - he doesn't know to whom, but he knows it's happening, and soon - and before he ties the knot (figuratively and literally) Castiel wants to have an experience all his own: he wants to bottom for an alpha. Nervous, terrified, Castiel goes to Palmeton’s red light district and hires Jensen, a gorgeous young alpha prostitute who smells like fresh-cut grass and sunshine and lemonade. With Jensen, Castiel finds the courage to ask for what he wants. Being knotted is amazing. Castiel’s not an omega, but…but being with Jensen - who's real name turns out to be Dean - is everything Castiel has dreamed of. And now he has to figure out: how is he supposed to go the rest of his life without experiencing that again?
First and Only by almaasi [Explicit, 35K, Aro&Demi!Cas]
Single bachelor Dean bets he can have sex more times within a calendar year than his happily-married brother. But when Castiel – Dean’s roommate, best friend, and total virgin – asks Dean to be his First, Dean’s plan to bed numerous strangers goes up in smoke. Over the weeks, then the months, Cas becomes his go-to guy. His “fuck buddy”, if you will. But that doesn’t sound right. It doesn’t feel right. Dean was Cas’ First, but now he wants to be Cas’ Only. Now he’s gotta figure out how the heck to court a guy he’s successfully wooed a hundred times already.
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(Trails of Cold Steel) Musse and Duvalie jealous HC's
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Musse doesn't get jealous easily.
She knows her S/O loves her, and is aware of her own teasing to all of her friends. It wouldn't make much sense or be fair if she got pouty for S/O hanging with other people.
Especially all the spicy comments she makes about Rean.
But Musse is still human, and she does crave the affection from her S/O.
So, Musse will just hang around S/O a bit more than usual if she's desiring their attention, before stealing them for a day or so for a date.
(Musse) "Oh, S/O. Do you think you could spend a bit of time for little ol' me?~...Joking aside, would you like to get lunch together? It's been a bit since we have."
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Hell hath no fury like a jealous Duvie.
Duvalie is already pretty tsundere, so when she gets jealous, her temper goes up significantly higher.
She's too proud to say it in front of anyone else other than her S/O, but she starts to feel a bit insecure, if maybe she wasn't the one to give them enough attention.
But those feelings quickly disappear when her S/O finally makes the time to take Duvalie out, alleviating her worries.
The strangest part about her jealousy, is that she won't make any snarky remarks, she'll actually be honest. At least when they're completely alone with no one to hear them.
(Duvalie) "Hey um...thanks for always dealing with me, S/O. I'm sorry if I'm always giving you a headache...T-This conversation doesn't leave this room, do you got that?!"
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olderthannetfic · 1 year
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I mean i can try-- god knows I've wondered which fucking wires crossed in my brain many many times myself-- but i can't promise I'll come to anh interesting conclusions.
I honestly think I had some kind of predisposition to like vore because i can't remember a time where I started liking it, only realizing that I did, long long LONG before i had any concept of what that meant. For me, personally, the vore part is a big part but it all very much falls under the endosoma umbrella-- the general fascination with the inside of the body, and implied fascination with being inside the body of someone else.
I kinda think that stems at least to some degree from my craving for physical affection? Big big big on physical touch, me; and my mother joked that when I was a toddler I would burrow into a hug as if I were trying to crawl inside the person holding me. It tracks.
So I was all of 5 or whatever and already deeply clingy and showing the beginning signs of an anxiety disorder. And then I got to see the magic school bus for lunch fir the first time and Huh why are fireworks going off behind my eyes
Istg I watched that movie so much as I kid it was absurd. I couldn't explain why it stuck to me so much, I didn't have the vocabulary or the comprehension, I was just Fascinated. I would dream of different scenarios that could have changed the direction the movie went, I dove face first into researching the human digestive system because maybe that's what I was so curious about and i was homeschooled so it was as simple as asking my mom what they were talking about. My sister, rwo years younger than me, had started a 'game' around that time that was essentially stories around the campfire where one of us would come up with an idea and the other would continue it and we'd tell stories that way-- and we had I think three of those that were various characters from our favorite movies eating each other. We still didn't know what we were doing, of course; it was just hilarious to us. Very 'throw blorbo in a situation' behavior, especially because neither of us had any interest in the fatal aspect-- i can't really speak for her, but for me, it was always about being inside another person. Being cradled. Being contained. Being protected.
The budding anxiety disorder definitely had an effect, and only got stronger as ~shit happened~ and a budding anxiety disorder blossomed into c-ptsd 🙃 I spent most of my childhood feeling utterly and completely unsafe, insecure in the most fundamental ways. And the idea of being eaten and held and hidden appealed r e a l l y powerfully.
An interesting angle to pin on this is I'm some level of demisexual-- and vore wasn't a very kinky kink for me for a long long time. It's much more so now, now that I'm older and a bit more in touch with my own brand of sensuality/sexuality, but I would have considered it a platonic-to-sex-neutral kink by name only from about the time of the epiphany to around... eh. 20ish? Maybe as late as 21, 22 even. And even now it is Still much more about the feeling of protection, of safety, of being wanted and held and cradled and intimately known that appeals the most to me. If i want to get off to it I look up object vore fics and videos of people swallowing real-ass things, vasefillers and marbles and cameras, because I still very much have an Endosoma Thing and a fierce oral fixation. But Vore vore? That's mostly a self comforting thing. Not always. I can definitely be turned on by a good vore fic and I am frequently turned on by good vore videos because the visual of internals is Big for me, but its usually a sexless thing? Usually. There are exceptions.
If it's a character I'm already attracted to that's it I'm a goner and I would like them to hurry the fuck up and eat me already. I'm very strongly 'prey-oriented' and would much prefer to Be Eaten than to Eat-- but I could go either way, depending. I'll run into a bit of art of a character inside a cup of boba (totally not referencing something that happened the other day aha) that the artist clearly meant innocently and lose my shit on discord to the fistful of friends who know the intricacies of my crossed wires fjdjdkdk the vore fixation and the oral fixation absolutely 100% bounce off each other and make each other worse, I can tell you that much.
Does any of that answer your questions, fellow anon?
(I wish I could send asks from the sideblog, I genuinely wouldn't mind attaching at least that name to this in the name of research and answering questions-- it's science if you write it down, no? But my main is mostly sfw, alas.)
--
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stheresya · 5 months
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What do you think Elizaveta was like pre fold or during the time she was trapped in the fold?
it's difficult to say considering the only pre-fold content we have of her is The Lives of Saints, a book that does not go in-depth into its saint life and its narratives are known to be slightly fabricated for religious purposes. but assuming some of the elements in her tale had basis on actual events and leaving aside all the religious propaganda, here's what we roughly get: a peasant girl had a special ability with bees. one day her village was attacked by raiders. she saved them all. they repaid her heroism by tearing her apart in a field of roses. this little summary makes me assume there are two elizavetas: the elizaveta that always was and the elizaveta that she became after the attack.
elizaveta is one with the bees, thus she has always been deeply connected with plants, especially roses -- she's the patron saint of gardeners, after all. and this connection probably influenced how her senses are affected by the world around her. there's this line in aleksander's pov: "He remembered how Elizaveta had craved sensation—the taste of wine, the touch of skin, the feel of soft earth beneath her feet." (The Monk, Ch. 26, RoW) this tells me that elizaveta liked to indulge her senses, that she was often seeking things that were pleasing to the eyes, the ears, the nose, the tongue, the stomach, the mind and the skin. this may be the one thing that remained unchanged throughout her life because i think that craving to simply feel alive is probably a consequence of her power. it kinda reminds me of dyonisus who was a deity of vegetation and also greatly associated with pleasure. now imagine someone like that being trapped for 400 hundred years in a place that denied her of her senses? it's no wonder she went a little mad.
but of course we have to talk about what she became after she was "murdered". in true anti-grisha hate crime fashion her murder is quite horrific. she was killed in the village that she had saved, bound and torn apart while her own people (who were only alive thanks to her) did nothing to object. this definitely made her resent humanity as a whole. we know for a fact that she was very close to the darkling before the fold and they probably met shortly after this incident. i think he provided her a safe haven and a purpose to fight for, and he was also the only one who was as unique as herself back then. imagine an unique person with immense power rescues you from certain death, helps you get stronger and gives your life purpose? at the very least you'll spend the rest of your life in gratitude to that person. so it's no wonder that she grew to worship the darkling. their power and uniqueness made her think of themselves not only as superior to the otkazat'sya but also other grisha. i'm not sure when when her views on power became so twisted, if she began to think like that shortly after her "death" or while she was trapped in the fold. because it's curious that elizaveta is so unwaveringly loyal to aleksander despite their goals being different, and we can't even argue that that loyalty is due to his great power and his uniqueness because she spent centuries alongside two people who were as powerful and as unique as herself and she hated them. maybe she truly loved sasha even as he was.
of the 3 saints trapped in the fold, i'd say liza was affected the most. their place was in a constant state of un-life. they were isolated from the world, there was no food, no smell, no hunger, no wind, no temperature. everything was monochromatic. they were alive but not really alive. they couldn't even sleep to get some momentary relief. these circumstances would take a great toll on anyone, but specially on someone who's so deeply connected to nature and soil life such as liza. the one thing that kept her going was hope that she would be joining aleksander someday and they would rule ravka together, in the meantime she occasionally used her powers to toy with her worshipers a little bit and pretended to debate her "roommates" on the best course of action to get out of the fold while hiding her real intentions.
TL;DR: elizaveta was a nature girl who liked to enjoy herself, but having an unique power, being part of persecuted group, and being in prison for centuries in a constant state of un-life without the ability to shut out her conscious for one second probably messed her up.
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eldritch-spouse · 1 year
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Finally it’s here!
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Meet Magnus, the shady yandere maecenas and Patches good friend
He is raven aarakocra, who works as a monster doctor in The Clergy Eye
He was born in well-known family of doctors, consisting of a monster mother, a human father, and three monster sisters. Being the youngest and most gifted child in the family, he was once the pride of his family was considered a worthy successor to his mother.
But after his father passed away, he began to think about the meaning of life and death, which led him to the path of studying magic, black in particular. After the years of researches, he decided to put knowledge into practice in the morgue of family's hospital. Unfortunately, he was interrupted during the ritual, which forever affected his appearance and reputation. He was expelled from his family and stripped of his medical license, so that wherever he went, he was only known as a disgrace to a noble name.
Therefore, he spent some time in underground hospitals, doing illegal and unethical operations, practicing his dark knowledge. After a while he met Patches and they became close friend out of common interests, which lead Magnus to The Clergy, the place where he can settle down and practice his craft with impunity
Fun facts
He is a obsessive yandere. Because of his noble origin, pride won’t let his confess to you, but he will always watch you from afar
Since he’s a half human, he is more attracted to humans, like Bregory
He treats Patches like little brother, despite Patches being much older and powerful that him
He’s pansexual
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. He’s actually a big fan of apples, especially apple cider. Also can get drunk on fermented apples
Despite liking humans and being half one, he won’t mind human dishes
Big fan of cultures and art. He’s perfect date is taking you to theater or fancy restaurant
He ain’t actually work in The Clergy, he only rent a place
He is the least dangerous monster out there. If he get to like you, he may let you hide from the staff
Krulu put him to watch over Vinnel, in case jester’s condition became worse
Besides Patches, nobody in The Clergy respect Magnus or take him seriously
Godd, it’s really take me long to create him. Hope u like it
[YOOO!! See, I said you'd get it done! Awesome stuff, he's pretty cute. <:3]
One has to wonder how he met Patches, and for how long! Granted, you did say Patches is much older compared to him, so I guess The Clergy is already well established by the time they encounter each other? I like to think Magnus saw him completely fuck up some sort of undead experiment. It's also hilarious that he treats Patches like a little brother, I suppose he exudes that hopeless sort of energy.
I feel sorry for Magnus having to deal with Vinnel, because the jester is mean to newbies, and he doesn't trust Magnus enough to let him have that much information about his condition, it's an extremely touchy subject. Vinnel can and will hurt Magnus if he's poked too much. Bird boy over here will have to prove himself to the clown.
I love the fact that he's bullied. And it makes sense, he's not staying there permanently, so he's not part of the core team, he's a fence sitter. And the one who's likely to take it the worst is Belo, who demands everyone always fully devote themselves to his lord. To him, Magnus is being disrespectful (even if Krulu agrees to keeping a distance).
Nebul might want to get to know him better, and Gallon as well- Having cultured coworkers of sorts is something they both crave.
Anyhow, good job! I love the doofus.
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uneducated-author · 10 months
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Hi! Your recent post about gods existing in BSD caught my attention and I felt sending this as an ask would work best for conciseness. In response to your tags, Arahabaki is actually just a singularity and not a god. [https://www.tumblr.com/originalaccountname/711614312754692096/sorry-to-bother-you-but-ive-been-getting-into-bsd?source=share] [https://www.tumblr.com/originalartblog/713410888979316736?source=share]
Also, as for other gods, I'm of the belief that Lovecraft is a god (y'know like eldritch gods) that's just able to take a human form. This is supported in that Dazai's ability doesn't nullify Lovecraft's because it isn't an ability, it's just him. This is also further supported by another theory but since there's the possibility it doesn't turn out to be the case, I won't mention it— but I will say that there is another person with god-like origins that Dazai has made contact with that his ability didn't nullify.
Lastly, there is Atsushi whose ability may be Baiho (or at least similar), the White Tiger God in Chinese mythology (called Byakko in Japan). The White Tiger that is Atsushi's ability has been repeatedly shown to be of its own sapience which is notably different from abilities like Kyouka's Demon Snow and more along the lines of Twain's Tom Sawyer & Huckleberry Finn. (Like the times he talks to and reconciles with the Tiger)
With the movie Dead Apple, Atsushi's ability is shown to be very special and there was also the major plot point of what occurs during season two where it was explicitly stated that Atsushi's ability specifically was the key to finding the book. Heck, him being hunted by the Port Mafia in season one was because of the Guild trying to get their hands on him.
To add, his ability working phenomenally in tandem with Akutagawa's is a potential allusion to Byakko's mythology. I'll be quoting it's wikipedia for this. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_Tiger_(mythology)
“As with the other three Symbols, there are seven astrological "Mansions" (positions of the Moon) within the White Tiger.” Beast Beneath the Moonlight
“In Chinese art, the white tiger often appears with the dragon. The white tiger symbolizes power and army.” Akutagawa is that dragon, which is obvious in the meaning behind his surname Ryuunosuke. The first character in his name 龍 (ryuu) means dragon because the real life author was born in the year of the dragon during the month of the dragon and the hour he was believed to be born was the hour of the dragon. His name, Ryuunosuke, literally translates to "son of the dragon". [http://yabai.com/p/4517] Whether Atsushi is like, Byakko incarnate or it's just his ability or something else, or even he straight up isn't actually a god— we don't have anything that confirms or denies it yet. Also I am sorry for rambling in your ask box, the topic of gods in BSD is something I'm rather passionate about.
First of all, this is sp incredibly interesting and I am fascinating at how my semi serious post has now given way to an actual craving for Lore (I'm trying to hunt down an edition of 15).
The whole Lovecraft thing definitely confused me and doubly so because I definitely thought (hoped) that since he's immune to Dazai he would play a larger role in the plot. I am curious though, as to whether Dazai coming into contact with Lovecraft would have any impact on his physical abilities, like limiting his speed or agility. (I suppose I am thinking a little of BNHA here. Eraserhead can't erase mutant quirks, but presumably could erase like, effects of a mutant quirk e.g: spitting acid or so) But he spends most of the fight bragging about Chuuya to Steinbeck so we don't really get to see how the two abilities would interact. It's interesting especially because Dazai CAN nullify Chuuya in corruption and Atsushi in his fully tiger state (which is a physical transformation) but has ZERO affect on Lovecraft's tentacle form.
(I'm desperately trying to think of the 'god like origin' character because I can't think of other BSD characters that Dazai's ability didn't affect... is it like Sigma or something, because he was created from the book?)
I was aware of Atsushi as Byakko, though I genuinely interpreted the 'consciousness' of the ability as moreso Atsushi's introspection, a visual way to show his personal healing and acceptance, though it's really interesting to know I was wrong! When I have time I'll have to rewatch those scenes with a fresh perspective. I was super into the Shinto belief as a kid, and it was actually how my friend persuaded me to get into BSD, and I'm loving the series so far. However, I'm honestly more familiar with the Qinglong and Baihu as the dragon of the East and tiger of the West.
(I had a very funny moment watching Dead Apple where I was insistent to my friend that 'Atsushi will definitely have to match off against the dragon, there's a lot of mythological basis' only to be proven completely wrong, though with the amazing Chuuya fight scene I couldn't be disappointed)
But I had completely missed the connection between Akutagawa and the dragon! That definitely adds a really interesting level to the dynamic between the two as members opposing forces with the matched goal.
Thank you so so so much for explaining this all in such an interesting way, it really made my day! I super appreciated it!
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mejomonster · 2 months
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Huai Dao: chapter 5. An Yuning has 2 fathers. Chief Mo and Professor An
1 oh i wonder if thats a particular trait template priest thought would be fun to use again (Chief Zhao and Professor Shen as makeshift parents of SID)
2 i always very much appreciate when people of different sexualities are sprinkled in novels. Priest did that in the stories ive read so far. In Modu it was especially nice because well how to say it - in some danmei (and bl and gl and queer novels period) there is the decision to avoid How sexuality and experiencing it in our own Biased society affects our personality and relationship To society.
Think 2Gether thai bl (where sexuality barely factors in regard to value of politics or rights or fears) versus thai bl like Not Me (political activism is tied to human rights the leads have intimate concern with and loved ones friends family lovers affected by) or The Eclipse (where lgbt cafes and mentors are santuaries and the default in the conservative school is to Closet out of fear of danger/punishment/isolation and how the queer kids are more likely to overlap with the schools protestors in part because their identity already makes it Critical they improve their world since they lose more by closeting and remain at risk if the status quo goes unchanged).
Well in modu, luo wenzhou's sexuality actually influences superiors views of him, he lives in a world where his sexuality prevents him from easy dating like Tao Ran or trying to start a family when he does crave that, makes supervisors view him differently and requires he rely on his status as a person with family connections to avoid consequences of discrimination, means how he understands fei dus sexuality and his own biases about fei du being bisexual not gay like him but Also them both being Playboys and therefore luo wenzhou able to empathize with why someone might handle their life that way. Its all shaped by luo wenzhou being gay in a society Like ours. The politics of his existence being treated certain ways by society and therefore Shaping him are present. Its both acknowledged he has a sexuality (gay rather than With an Exception like some old school bl) and also that it influences his relationship to the world (being gay Does affect him socially politically and in relating to other people like straight colleagues vs queer ones) in a way NOT all romance bl care to touch on. Which i understand - romance is an escape or you want it to be an escape sometimes, want to have a story where someone gay isnt treated differently by straight people and isnt isolated by their difference in experience and straight people magically fully relate with zero difficulty or adjustment or consideration to How it is different (including things like universes with gay marriage already and gay majorities in story unlike real life so the straight characters have no commentary to even make regarding a difference in experiejce because discrimination does not exist in this escapism romance or its not something u want to focus on).
Well i like when stories do mention it though, for my preference in enjoying stories, most of the time. Because my life just wasnt like a straight persons. I had fears admitting my first crush, ignorance in figuring out what i even felt, terror at who found out what i figured out about myself, accepting if what i felt could be embraced and why and how much, realizing what id have to do to help myself and people like me to be safe... things some straight people just did not experience (some did! Many kinds of relationship types and people), at least not straight cis people who fit the Hallmark expectation of Ideal romance in how it should work. I dont relate to a character who just never has considered even a little some yhings ive had to be aware of freuqently and navigate. So i appreciate when a story does touch on it, even if its not the focus.
Shout out to In The Dark for this btw. I mean im only 1/6 through the story. But while its mentioned some sexualities realistically how they might actyally get brought up in a workplace, the writing also mentioned overweight women as beautiful. Which i have not run into happening before in like Any other danmei i read or bl i watched (except Maybe not me with Gram flirting with his ex). Also shout out to In The Dark and Huai Dao for having some characters from out of country (fuck it Modu too) which isnt like hyper important, but it does create a sense that these stories take place in a realistic kind of world. Where people do travel, where lives may be lived in more than one area, where you often run into people from other areas eventually who dont have the same one to one frame of the world.
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