#but I can't see my child hurt like that again

[villainousauthor]

Part one

Hero is sitting on the hardwood floors of the living room, as they pass another block to their baby.

She takes it with a giggle, stacking it atop the other ones. Hero can't help but grin at how much this activity is entertaining her, and them as well.

"She's getting good with those blocks."

Hero jumps at the sudden sound of Villain's voice behind them. They must have snuck in through the balcony again. Villain comes and sits next to Hero with an annoying grin.

"You need to stop sneaking up on me like that! And you need to stop breaking in." Hero exclaims, shoving Villain's shoulder.

Instead of immediately responding, Villain feigns hurt.

"Ow! Not in front of the kid, what are you teaching her about hitting?" Villain teases with a snicker before answering seriousness. "You can't come out and fight with me anymore -"

"I have an infant to take care of."

"-I understand why, but that just means I have to come annoy you here now." Villain finishes like Hero didn't interrupt. Hero rolls their eyes at this. They've been coming regularly now for the past few months, never knocking, just letting themselves in. So irritating.

The baby crawls across the floor to where both Hero and Villain sit, having forgotten about her blocks. For a moment, Hero thinks their child is crawling to them until she makes a beeline for Villain. Not surprising, Villain has quickly become a favorite for the young child.

'Betrayed by my own kin.' Hero thinks quietly, shaking their head.

Hero can't pretend they haven't been of help, though, with how they seem to so naturally know how to care for the baby. Hero still wonders how they know so much about child care, but Villain won't divulge. At the very least, the extra pair of hands has taken some burden off Hero's shoulders.

They watch as Villain reaches for her, another one of those rare genuine smiles on their face they only ever seem to show while here. Hero tries to ignore how it makes their heart beat faster.

"You're getting so good at crawling." Villain coos, picking the baby up gently. "At least someone is happy to see me here." Villain says humorously.

"I bet it's the only time anyone is happy to see you." Hero replies, though their tone isn't as serious, and they scoot closer to Villain.

"Heh, probably." Villlain shakes their head, still smiling, though as they hold the baby.

Hero feels the same questions burning in the back of their mind again, curiosity eating them up from the inside. They know Villain is unlikely to answer and will dodge the question again like always, but Hero can't help but ask.

"Are you a parent, Villain?" Hero's voice is quiet as they ask, soft as they bring up the subject. They've never asked so directly before, and for a split moment, they think they see a flash of sadness on Villain's face.

Before they can respond, though, the baby makes a noise, spitting up directly on Villain's shirt. Hero immediately comes and takes the infant into their arms.

"I'm so sorry!" Hero's voice is apologetic, as they look to make sure their baby is okay. Villain is unphased, though, as they smirk.

"Don't worry about it." They look to how she immediately smiles up with those chubby baby cheeks and dimples at both of them. "She thinks that's funny. You're raising a little mini villain, Hero." Villain's voice is full of amusement. Hero rolls their eyes as they stand.

"I can wash that for you if want, I think I have a spare shirt in about your size." They offer, still feeling bad. They set the baby in her play pin as they lead Villain through the house to their bedroom. Hero paws through their dresser until they find the shirt.

Turning around, they find Villain is already removing their own shirt, and Hero tries not to pay attention to the curve and contour of their toned body. Flushing red, Hero thrusts the shirt in their direction, averting their gaze.

Villain takes it, chuckling at their reaction.

"You really don't have to apologize. You have an adorable kid." Villain's voice is softer than normal.

Smiling gently, Hero nods. This is something they both can agree on. "Yeah, she is."

"I have no idea where she gets it from." Villain continues, teasing in their tone evident. Hero pushes their shoulder in retaliation.

"I happen to be adorable as hell."

Villain takes Hero's hand and pulls them close. "You're just hot. There's a difference." Their voice is low and rumbling.

Stomach fluttering, Hero can't help the heat rising up their neck. This has also been happening frequently, Villain's teasing and flirtatious comments. Hero can't tell if they actually mean it or are trying to get a reaction.

Hero doesn't know how to respond, always replying to their teasing words with flustered laughter or deadpan replies. When they don't respond, Villain continues speaking.

"I'll come back later to return your shirt." Their voice still has that playful air, but they look a little dejected. They turn to presumably climb back out the balcony like a maniac.

Before they can think otherwise, Hero grabs them by the elbow, their skin soft and warm under theirs.

"Wait- you don't have to leave." Their voice is still sounding flustered as they speak in a rush. "You should stay. If you want.."

Villain's resulting smile has their heart quickening. "I couldn't say no to spending more time with my favorite ankle bitter. Or to annoying you some more." Their voice is light and joking as they head out of the bedroom, back towards the living room.

"Have you ever thought about having any more?" Villain asks suddenly, as Hero follows after.

They haven't really thought about this. The kid they have now is already a handful, but the mental image of a big family is an endearing one.

"I haven't really thought about it," Hero says, picking their infant up from her pen. "Why do you ask?"

Villain leans in close, offering a finger to the baby. They smile as she grabs it, before looking up to Hero's eyes. Their gaze is full of warmth and amusement, and something else that gives Hero butterflies. Villain's voice is warm and flirtatious when they speak.

"We could have some cute babies."

#hero x villain #prompts #dialogue prompt #original writing #hero #hero prompt #villain #villain prompt #villain x hero #superhero #writing prompts #writeblr #writers on tumblr

[lover-of-mine]

Okay, but I kinda wanna talk about the panic attack conversation with new context, because here's the thing, the wording of that conversation is very on purpose. And Buck is calling Eddie out in a very specific way because what Buck is saying is actually "if you love me you're not going to do that to her" but like, everything about that conversation is crazy. Buck is checking in in a way I feel he's very entitled to considering that he gets Chris if something happens to Eddie, so if Eddie is seeing cardiologists, something might be wrong and I think Eddie gave up the right to privacy about his health when he signed his will, but like, does Buck assume the problem is the shooting because he is still anxious about it? And like, Buck is assuming things are fine with Ana, we have no reason to believe things aren't fine with Taylor, but you don't talk about a relationship you want to be in as just fine, and Buck is talking about loving someone who doesn't love him enough to be all the way in and he's talking about Abby, but is he? The will reveal was a love confession. But halfway done. It was a shield. Eddie hiding behind Chris. "My kid loves her" "Is that enough?". Is Buck saying your kid loves me. You offered him to me. What does it mean? Is that all it takes? If that's all it takes then why aren't you all the way in with me? Why does all I get is a maybe under a condition I can't live with? "Somehow we became a ready made family and I don't know if I'm ready for that" Buck has been taking care of Chris since he found out Chris existed. Someone assumed Eddie, Chris and Buck were a family months into them knowing each other. Is Buck seeing that as Eddie being scared of any type of family? Is Buck seeing that as Eddie being scared of his place in Chris' life? Does he think Eddie would freak out if it was him? That's pretty much the only situation where we see Buck seem genuinely mad at Eddie. Eddie confessed his love hiding behind his child, now he's having all these feelings about someone assuming Ana's place in their life. Is Buck feeling as rejected there because he has no way of knowing if Eddie wouldn't react like that if someone assumed that about them? Because the will is a love confession but is one that Buck can't accept. In his head that is conditional. And the price is something he will never be willing to pay. "If you don't want to hurt Ana, you owe it to her to be honest" "come on, Eddie, if you're not gonna be honest with Frank, at least be honest with me", "look, man, you don't need to pretend with me" was Buck begging for clarification? Was Buck asking if he's allowed to want this? Has Buck been daring Eddie to say it again because he doesn't know if he read what happened right since Eddie didn't mention it again and he can't risk being wrong? Is the miscommunication of this situation even deeper than we imagined? Did Eddie assume Buck rejected what he offered while Buck assumed Eddie didn't love him enough to offer everything? Does Eddie understand that while he offered everything, he put a condition to it that Buck will never take because Buck needs him too much to even consider? Does Eddie understand that he offered Buck everything he ever wanted and put it just out of his reach in a place Buck would never dare to reach for anyway, because he thinks the only way he gets there is if Eddie dies and Eddie dying means he's not actually getting everything he wanted? I wrote in a fic once "I can't ask for more of you, Eddie" "everything is already yours", but do they even realize that that's what's going on? That they are imagining obstacles that could be solved if they were just honest with each other the way they keep begging the other to be? Do they even understand that the only thing between them is the way they keep assuming things and acting on that assumption instead of just asking for clarification? "You don't need to decide right now" does Buck think that Eddie not telling him again means he made a decision already? Are they just looking at each other thinking they can't reach for it????????

Are they just trapped in the moment that gun went off watching the other fall away and helpless to do anything about it??????

#im gonna go crazy #911 #thoughts thoughts thoughts #buddie #buddie thoughts

[luceafarul-de-dimineata]

Expanding on my previous post, I think having to take care of child of the enemy would be such a wonderful deconstruction of Leviathan's character.

Leviathan's main motivation for everything he does is to protect the future of Hell, to protect the children and avange the ones that were lost in the experiments. He eliminates anything that might be dangerous for Hell because if there's even a 1% chance of someone suffering he would blame himself for it. He wants to go find the seed of the fruir of knowledge even though he knows it's a dangerous journey, just because it might save his subjects.

Also, Leviathan (as far as we know) has the most personal reason to hate angels. He's seen them at their cruelest and they've always been a traumatic force in his life. While the other kings got to have more peaceful childhoods (again, we don't know if they were abused, I'm just going off what we know) Leviathan never had that priveledge. Even before the war he was abused by them, and now, in his adulthood, he still can't move on because he sees his subjects being killed and tortured by the same people that abused him.

I think that out of all the characters, Leviathan would be the most... interesting father. Don't get me wrong, he won't be bad, but the sort of abuse that Leviathan had to go through changes you in ways you might never expect. He loves kids, the main reason he fights this war is to make sure the children in Hell get a childhood that isn't characterised primarly by war and death. But if he had to deal with a child 1 on 1 for long stretches of time...

He'll probably be extremely overprotective of them, going by the same rule of 1% change of danger = death. The way most parenting works, especially from people that were abused in their childhoods, is that of trying to protect the child from the trauma they experienced. I doupt Leviathan would even let angels look at his kid, or anyone that he percieves as dangerous for that matter.

We also see in the Orias event that Leviathan can be very nice to the people he likes, and I think that it would be the same for his kid. It would be something like

Leviathan strangling MC: I need to kill you, MC, for your life is bringing certain doom amoungst my people

Levi's kid: Dad, can you help me with my algebra?

Leviathan dropping MC to the ground: Yes, sweetheart, what is it? Do you want us to repeat your multiplications table?

Tl;dr of this post is - stop saying Leviathan would be a shit dad. He'll be overprotective of his kid, but he'll never in a million years hurt a child

#whb #what in hell is bad #whb leviathan #I can't believe that my first character analysis is on one of my least favorite characters #and one of my least favorite tropes #let's just throw a kid into the mix #I just think that childhood is the most important thing to Levi's character #lamenting that he never had a childhood #hating the people that took away his childhood #and doing everything in his power to protect other people's childhoods from being like his #if only mc was an actual character in the game and I could enjoy the main story

[nauticalnova]

heyy I saw your requests were open! Can i requset the typical crewel father figure stuff? If not that's totally okay! Lots of fluff with a gn!reader or a AFAB reader :3

Note : This did turn into a lil bit of angst, as in it made me cry while writing it. I'm sorry. It will happen again. A little cw for Crewel being judgy about everyone and everything. Enjoy!

☆ He's in full denial

☆ Doesn't want kids, never has, never will.

☆ At the same time though, he's parental towards you

☆ He still claims that he's only doing his part as a teacher (ignore the designer jacket he's draping over your shoulders)

☆ I think it'll take a long long time for him to warm up to being an actual figure for you.

☆ Maybe he'll do the whole push and pull thing, where he'll get really close with you, head pats, telling you he's proud of you, only to be kinda cold the next day. (I can't resist angst I'm sorry ;-;)

☆ He's of course been seen as a father figure by students before, but this is the first time he's seen a student as anything more.

☆ Not to say that he doesn't care for his students; no, he's quite close with a lot of them.

☆ Usually though, that's where the relationship went. He guides them, nurtures them, and wants to see them succeed.

☆ Parenthood is something entirely different. He understands this, he knows that it's an entirely different challenge all together.

☆ Parenting is to put the child before yourself, to care so much that it almost hurts, to have your very being tied to this child, helpless and alone without the proper guidance and knowing you have to be the one to guide them. (I'm getting carried away omg)

☆ Anyway, all that aside he'll start accepting that he sees you as a child probably after Azul's overblot.

☆ Seeing students in danger isn't exactly uncommon in a magic academy, so he's used to wrangling precarious pups to deal with any and all situations. He's learned to be calm and level headed in situations as required.

☆ That 'calm in a crisis' behavior doesn't last when you're involved though.

☆ After seeing you go through way, way too much, yet again, the reality of the situation finally clicks in.

☆ You're a kid, fully alone, no parent to call, no adult to help, nothing in a unfamiliar, terrifying situation.

☆ He decides to do the mature thing (unlike some people crowley) and thinks about how he actually views you instead of running away from his feelings for the 200th time.

☆ And now you have a dad that bitches about your possible love interests.

☆ He's supportive about your decisions, to be fair. He doesn't beat the boys away with sticks and stuff like that.

☆ That doesn't stop him from being judgy.

☆ "Hm...interesting choice"

☆ Literally mean girls you into good decisions

☆ Does have a tendency to be a little mean about fashion

☆ "Are you sure about...that? No no, it looks fine... As long as you like it"

☆ (oh n o I'm turning him into my mom)

☆ Overall, he's a good parent. He understands what needs a child has, and meets them fairly well.

☆ He's fairy loose with his parenting. You're allowed a lot of freedom, because he trusts that you can take care of yourself, and know when to come to him.

☆ This does mean he expects a lot from you. There's a level of maturity he expects, and he'll be disappointed if you don't meet that.

☆ He does learn to let up after a while though. He might know a lot about what parenting entails, but of course, theory and practice are two different things.

☆ Gift giving? Gift giving. Any hobby you have is 100% supplemented by him.

☆ And if that hobby is fashion? Yeah, there are a few days where the two of you don't see the sun.

☆ In the end, both of you are adjusting a lot. It takes a little while for him to figure out what you need, and what he has to do, but in the end, he does his best. And that's what counts, more than anything.

#twst x reader #platonic twst x reader #divus crewel x reader #platonic crewel x reader

[47-protons]

i need to kill the creature in my brain i think

#gripping it and shaking it and slamming it to the ground #sometimes it is small and little. like a hamster or perhaps a domesticated rat. it is managable #i can hold it and cuddle it close to my chest and go hey. Hey. you're okay. promise. you've misinterpreted something #and here is what is actually happening. #and other times. it is just a giant hulking mass of dark fuzzy goop and if it touches you you lose time and everything is fuzzy and muted #and you are beating it off with a broom or a stick or your bare hands or a childhood book you grabbed off the shelf #and it's larger than the room you're in and it's all encompasing and it's so so so so so fucking Mean to you. #and i can't ever kill it. but sometimes if i take a nap. or cry it out. it at least gets smaller. maybe down to a Particularly irate #large dog. and then from there. when we have both calmed down. i can see that this dog just has a thorn or a sticker in its paw or something #and i can help it. and we can both calm down. and we are both so so so tired. and it will go back to being a hamster. and i can hold it. #and this cycle will always repeat #you pick out the hurt and you look at it and you go Well. seeing it helps. and i at least Know now. what hurt me so bad #but it doesn't necessarily stop you from stepping in the sticker patch again y'know?? #especially when sometimes i think my parents will toss whole sticker bushes at me and not realize it #and i feel lowkey like i'm sitting in the middle of the elementary school baseball diamond again. surrounded by stickers and goatheads. #none of this makes sense but i am Very bad with emotion words. i have sad and happy and a few other specific ones #but for the most part beyond that?? every feeling i feel is not Words it is Situations And The Feelings Attached To It #loving my dog is like being taken to an ice cream shop on your birthday as a young child #loving my best friend is like standing in the grass with your shoes wet from the dew watching the sunrise and the specific rose-pink #that the clouds turn in mid-august.

[imissthefire]

the forging bonds supports omfg 🥺

#soren #my dear boy #seeing him interacting with himself when he was at his lowest after he's had time to heal and recover from all he went through... my heart #child!soren #really just needs support and someone who can listen even tho he can't say a word... soren and ike taking care of him... uncle ranulf #everything about it #i'm weak over this you don't even know #brave!soren #has grows SO incredibly much and the fact others have remarked on it (ranulf) and that he's being more patient and more tolerant #like yeah he's still got his acerbic and not-quite-approachable personality but he's not just running from everything or pushing it all down #i know i already mentioned ike but omfg seeing his ''feed soren'' instinct pop back out and how reliving that must be so emotionally intense #he's seeing the man he's watched grow and heal so much at his weakest again? knowing he won't forget it this time? FUCK! #i've seen tonnes of people saying how he and soren are basically coparenting him and i love that sm because yeah.gif the little guy needs it #like their b support in por when soren mentions how he never had a parent to help shape who he was or how he never was shown that affection #they know that even if this soren goes back to his world one day that he will go back knowing what it feels like to be loved and cared for #and b!soren basically telling c!soren that he's going to be okay eventually? CRYING IN THE CLUB #sure he didn't say that verbatim but yk. it's gotta hurt a lot to see himself in this position again i don't blame him for being cold to him #fuck! #i could go on #but i will call it here bc i will write an essay nobody asked for #maybe i will anyway in another post #or mayb consider actually posting my writing and put together a lil fic if i'm feeling bold 👀 #either way #gabe rambles #fe #feh #fe heroes #cyl 7 #fe9/10 #nqp

[clamorybus]

my sib is breaking up with their shitty 50 year old bf!! 🤟

#he's not abusive as far as im aware he's just a massive dick #like he goaded them into buying him $180 worth of vitamins and refused to pay then back #even though he has rich fucking parents who still gives him money regularly #and he has a bunch of expensive guitars he can sell if need be #like he has 15 electric guitars #a couple of which arw worth over $1000 #so if he was really hurting he wouldn't bum for cash from their 24 year old partner whom he knows #works a low paying job and has constant car troubles they have to pay for #because again he has rich parents who regularly take him on vacation and have vacation homes!!!!! #mickey.txt #also he makes my sib do his laundry for him which!!! #yeah he does have a sensitivity to perfumes so he can't go to the laundromat without passing out #but he also sees his rich parents regularly enough that he could do laundry at their place!!! #not make his child bride do it!!!!! #sorry i just hate him #i never even met him in person and i hate his guts

[monstrumpuella]

#lore olympus #lo persephone #lo demeter #oh my gosh #its like nothing has changed #how long must Demeter and Persephone fight over this? #then again #i can see where she's going with this #demeter has no idea how much Persephone has changed when she left for Olympus #or maybe it was before the act of wrath that Persephone began to change and Demeter didn't want to see much less acknowledge it #but now it has #Persephone has grown she is no longer a child and has made choices for herself on how she wants to live and who to love #Demeter has good misguided intentions if anything all she wants is to protect her baby #but she can't Demeter has to let Persephone live her life even if it ends up hurting herself in the process #thats just how it is

[jewishvitya]

A pro-Palestine Jew on tiktok asked those of us who were raised pro-Israel, what got us to change our minds on Palestine. I made a video to answer (with my voice, not my face), and a few people watched it and found some value in it. I'm putting this here too. I communicate through text better than voice.

So I feel repetitive for saying this at this point, but I grew up in the West Bank settlements. I wrote this post to give an example of the extent to which Palestinians are dehumanized there.

Where I live now, I meet Palestinians in day to day life. Israeli Arab citizens living their lives. In the West Bank, it was nothing like that. Over there, I only saw them through the electric fence, and the hostility between us and Palestinians was tangible.

When you're a child being brought into the situation, you don't experience the context, you don't experience the history, you don't know why they're hostile to you. You just feel "these people hate me, they don't want me to exist." And that bubble was my reality. So when I was taught in school that everything we did was in self defense, that our military is special and uniquely ethical because it's the only defensive military in the world - that made sense to me. It slotted neatly into the reality I knew.

One of the first things to burst the bubble for me was when I spoke to an old Israeli man and he was talking about his trauma from battle. I don't remember what he said, but it hit me wrong. It conflicted with the history as I understood it. So I was a bit desperate to make it make sense again, and I said, "But everything we did was in self defense, right?"

He kinda looked at me, couldn't understand at all why I was upset, and he went, "We destroyed whole villages. Of course we did. It was war, that's what you do."

And that casual "of course" stuck with me. I had to look into it more.

I couldn't look at more accurate history, and not at accounts by Palestinians, I was too primed against these sources to trust them. The community I grew up in had an anti-intellectual element to it where scholars weren't trusted about things like this.

So what really solidified this for me, was seeing Palestinian culture.

Because part of the story that Israel tells us to justify everything, is that Palestinians are not a distinct group of people, they're just Arabs. They belong to the nations around us. They insist on being here because they want to deny us a homeland. The Palestinian identity exists to hurt us. This, because the idea of displacing them and taking over their lands doesn't sound like stealing, if this was never theirs and they're only pretending because they want to deprive us.

But then foods, dances, clothing, embroidery, the Palestinian dialect. These things are history. They don't pop into existence just because you hate Jews and they're trying to move here. How gorgeous is the Palestinian thobe? How stunning is tatreez in general? And when I saw specific patterns belonging to different regions of Palestine?

All of these painted for me a rich shared life of a group of people, and countered the narrative that the Palestininian identity was fabricated to hurt us. It taught me that, whatever we call them, whatever they call themselves, they have a history in this land, they have a right to it, they have a connection to it that we can't override with our own.

I started having conversations with leftist friends. Confronting the fact that the borders of the occupied territories are arbitrary and every Israeli city was taken from them. In one of those conversations, I was encouraged to rethink how I imagine peace.

This also goes back to schooling. Because they drilled into us, we're the ones who want peace, they're the ones who keep fighting, they're just so dedicated to death and killing and they won't leave us alone.

In high school, we had a stadium event with a speaker who was telling us about a person who defected from Hamas, converted to Christianity and became a Shin Bet agent. Pretty sure you can read this in the book "Son of Hamas." A lot of my friends read the book, I didn't read it, I only know what I was told in that lecture. I guess they couldn't risk us missing out on the indoctrination if we chose not to read it.

One of the things they told us was how he thought, we've been fighting with them for so long, Israelis must have a culture around the glorification of violence. And he looked for that in music. He looked for songs about war. And for a while he just couldn't find any, but when he did, he translated it more fully, and he found out the song was about an end to wars. And this, according to the story as I was told it, was one of the things that convinced him. If you know know the current trending Israeli "war anthem," you know this flimsy reasoning doesn't work.

Back then, my friend encouraged me to think more critically about how we as Israelis envision peace, as the absence of resistance. And how self-centered it is. They can be suffering under our occupation, but as long as it doesn't reach us, that's called peace. So of course we want it and they don't.

Unless we're willing to work to change the situation entirely, our calls for peace are just "please stop fighting back against the harm we cause you."

In this video, Shlomo Yitzchak shares how he changed his mind. His story is much more interesting than mine, and he's much more eloquent telling it. He mentions how he was taught to fear Palestinians. An automatic thought, "If I go with you, you'll kill me." I was taught this too. I was taught that, if I'm in a taxi, I should be looking at the driver's name. And if that name is Arab, I should watch the road and the route he's taking, to be prepared in case he wants to take me somewhere to kill me. Just a random person trying to work. For years it stayed a habit, I'd automatically look at the driver's name. Even after knowing that I want to align myself with liberation, justice, and equality. It was a process of unlearning.

On October, not long after the current escalation of violence, I had to take a taxi again. A Jewish driver stopped and told me he'll take me, "so an Arab doesn't get you." Israeli Jews are so comfortable saying things like this to each other. My neighbors discussed a Palestinian employee, with one saying "We should tell him not to come anymore, that we want to hire a Jew." The second answered, "No, he'll say it's discrimination," like it would be so ridiculous of him. And the first just shrugged, "So we don't have to tell him why." They didn't go through with it, but they were so casual about this conversation.

In the Torah, we're told to treat those who are foreign to us well, because we know what it's like to be the foreigner. Fighting back against oppression is the natural human thing to do. We know it because we lived it. And as soon as I looked at things from this angle, it wasn't really a choice of what to support.

#riki babbles #I had this in my drafts for ages and I was like 'not the time' but a friend encouraged me to share so here it is #palestine

[stromblessed]

Mizu, femininity, and fallen sparrows

In my last post about Mizu and Akemi, I feel like I came across as overly critical of Mizu given that Mizu is a woman who - in her own words - has to live as a man in order to go down the path of revenge.

If she is ever discovered to be female by the wrong person, she will not only be unable to complete her quest, but there's a good chance that she'll be arrested or killed.

So it makes complete sense for Mizu to distance herself as much as possible from any behavior that she feels like would make someone question her sex.

I felt so indignant toward Mizu on my first couple watchthroughs for this moment. Why couldn't Mizu bribe the woman and her child's way into the city too? If Mizu is presenting as a man, couldn't she claim to be the woman's escort?

However, this moment makes things pretty clear. Mizu knows all too well the plight of women in her society. She knows it so well that she cannot risk ever finding herself back in their position again. She helps in what little way she can - without drawing attention to herself.

Mizu is not a hero and she is not one to make of herself a martyr - she will not set herself on fire to keep others warm. There's room to argue that Mizu shouldn't prioritize her quest over people's lives, but given the collateral damage Mizu can live with in almost every episode of season 1, Mizu is simply not operating under that kind of morality at this point. ("You don't know what I've done to reach you," Mizu tells Fowler.)

And while I still feel like Mizu has an obvious and established blind spot when it comes to Akemi because of their differences in station, such that Mizu's judgment of Akemi and actions in episode 5 are the result of prejudice rather than the result of Mizu's caution, I also want to establish that Mizu is just as caged as Akemi is, despite her technically having more freedom while living as a man.

Mizu can hide her mixed race identity some of the time, and she can hide her sex almost all of the time, but being able to operate outside of her society's strict rules for women does not mean she cannot see their plight.

It does not mean she doesn't hurt for them.

Back to Mizu and collateral damage, remember that sparrow?

While Mizu is breaking into Boss Hamata's manse, she gets startled by a bird and kills it on reflex. She then cradles it in her hands - much more tenderly than we've seen Mizu treat almost anything up to this point in the season:

She then puts it in its nest, with its unhatched eggs. Almost like she's trying to make the death look natural. Or like an accident.

You see where I'm going with this.

When Mizu kills Kinuyo, Mizu lingers in the moment, holding the body tenderly:

And btw a lot of stuff about this show hit me hard, but this remains the biggest gut punch of them all for me, Mizu holding that poor girl's body close, GOD

When Mizu arranges the "scene of the crime," Kinuyo's body is delicate, birdlike. And Mizu is so shaken afterward that she gets sloppy. She's horrified at this kill to the point that she can't bring herself to take another innocent life - the boy who rats her out.

MIZU'S ONE MOMENT OF SOFTNESS AND MERCY, COMING ON THE HEELS OF HER NEEDING TO KILL A GIRL TO SPARE HER THE WORST FATE THAT THIS RIGID SOCIETY HAS TO OFFER WOMEN, AND TO SPARE A BROTHEL FULL OF INNOCENT WOMEN WHO ARE THE CASTOFFS OF SOCIETY, NEARLY RESULTS IN ALL OF THEIR DEATHS

No wonder Mizu is as stoic and cold as she is.

And no wonder Mizu has no patience for Akemi whatsoever right before the terrible reveal and the fight breaks out:

Speaking of Akemi - guess who else is compared to a bird!

The plumage is more colorful, a bit flashier. But a bird is a bird.

And, uh

Yeah.

I like to think that Mizu killing the sparrow is not only foreshadowing for what she must do to Kinuyo, but is also a representation of the choice she makes on Akemi's behalf. She decides to cage the bird because she believes the bird is "better off." Better off caged than... dead.

But because Mizu doesn't know Akemi or her situation, she of course doesn't realize that the bird is fated to die if it is caged and sent back home.

Mizu is clearly not happy, or pleased, or satisfied by allowing Akemi to be dragged back to her father:

But softness and mercy haven't gotten Mizu anywhere good, recently.

There is so much tragedy layered into Mizu's character, and it includes the things she has to witness and the choices she makes - or believes she has to make - involving women, when she herself can skirt around a lot of what her society throws at women. Although, I do believe that it comes at the cost of a part of Mizu's soul.

After all, I'm gonna be haunted for the rest of this show by Mizu's very first prayer in episode 1:

"LET" her die. Because as Ringo points out, she doesn't "know how" to die.

Kind of like another bird in this show:

#blue eye samurai #mizu #akemi #kinuyo #bes #women are birds okay they are BIRDS #the let me die line is so SCARY AND SAD like a part of Mizu wants death but she cant? she doesnt know how?? excuse you show??? #when all these other delicate birds are dying all around her #akemis character gets more and more gutwrenching upon subsequent rewatches because whenever she says her life is in danger #NO ONE BELIEVES HER - certainly not other women #because shes rich and pampered and that means shes safe and is worrying about nothing right? right????? #and it turns out that all of akemis instincts were right and she was in danger the ENTIRE TIME #also I need to make a post just for kinuyo because I am sad

[mirohlayo]

LITTLE SPOON

( Lando is always the big spoon, so you decided to reverse the roles. )

warning : fluff and fluff and fluff

note : lando who says he never tried to be the little spoon in the chicken shop date video gave me this absolutely cute idea 🥹

word count : 1.3k

It was a pretty busy and stressful day for Lando. Free practice on the Australian circuit was very intense. Despite the fact that these tests went rather well, the fact remains that the curly-haired driver had only been waiting for one thing since this morning: to rest with his girlfriend in his arms.

This day exhausted Lando to the point where he couldn't think of anything other than throwing himself on you and cuddling you until you fell asleep, in each other's arms. The only thing he needs now is to see your pretty face and snuggle up to you.

So, while you were lying on the large double bed that reigned in your hotel room, you absentmindedly watched the television hanging on the wall opposite. You stayed almost all day in the paddock, and more particularly in the garage to support your boyfriend. But the fatigue was much more present and Lando encouraged you to rest at the hotel.

You waited patiently for your lover, because you too knew that he desired your presence just as much as you desired his. And in a fairly short space of time, you see your favorite driver suddenly appear in front of you, leaning against the door frame.

He can't help but smile at the sight of you. He missed seeing your pretty face, and your magnificent smile that you currently wear on your lips. You're just adorable and Lando only wants to cover your face with thousands of kisses.

“Hey baby” He approaches the bed, to place a soft kiss on your forehead. “How did the free practice sessions go?” You ask him curiously, but instead of receiving an answer he places another kiss on your cheek. "I don't want to talk about that. My beautiful girl is here just for me so I want to focus all my attention on her".

He smiles at you like a child, before changing into more comfortable clothes. He then comes back to you again, and without further delay he jumps into bed to take you in his arms. However, you intercept his gesture and step back, leaving him with his arms wide open, empty without the presence of your body.

He frowns, somewhat hurt by your gesture. You give him a comforting smile, before opening your arms too. “Now it’s your turn to be the little spoon.” You nod for him to come and snuggle against your body, but he continues to display a perplexed expression.

"No, I've always been the big spoon. I've never been the little spoon so why should I be now?" He tries to convince you to keep your usual roles, namely you in his arms while he comes to hold you tightly against his chest.

You widen your eyes, surprised. "What? You've never tried to be the little spoon before?" You ask quite surprised. He shakes his head no. "I've always played the role of the big spoon. I prefer it." It's your turn to frown now. "Well it's the perfect time to switch roles. I'm going to be the big spoon and you the little one, okay?"

Lando remains skeptical for a moment, preoccupied with the idea of being the little spoon. He loves having you safe and warm in his arms, being able to hold you a little tighter every minute against him, being able to admire your face as you relax in his embrace. If he becomes the little spoon, he won't be able to do that.

Finally, he shakes his head and leans back, crossing his arms. "No. If I was the little spoon I wouldn't be able to have you in my arms, and I don't like that." You have the impression of seeing him pout and this vision makes you smile stupidly. However, you roll your eyes, exhausted by his perhaps a little too dramatic reactions.

"Baby, if you don't try to be the little spoon you'll never know what it's like to be one. I assure you the feeling is so good, you should really try." You try to make your softest eyes at him to convince him to change his mind. “You could at least do that for your girlfriend right?” You look at him begging.

He stares at you with narrowed eyes, still somewhat skeptical. But your puppy dog face and your desire to hold him are too much for him. He can't resist his girl's desires, because after all, you're the priority and he can never say no to the person he loves most in the world.

He sighs before letting go. “Okay, I can try being the little spoon.” You jump with joy and excitement as he rolls his eyes exaggeratedly. You lay back down on the mattress and open your arms again, now forcing him to come into your embrace.

He smiles mischievously at you before finally collapsing into your arms, trying to snuggle as close to your body as he can. Your arms come around and hug him tightly against your body, while he nestles his head in the crook of your neck. His curls tickle the skin of your neck, while you let out some giggle.

After finally finding the most comfortable position, you feel your boyfriend relax in your arms, randomly placing a few kisses in the crook of your neck or on your shoulders. You play with his hair, wrapping a few curls around your finger or lightly pulling on it to make it bounce.

He lets out a small groan of pleasure, nestling a little closer against you, as you gently caress his back. You lower your head to admire him. He really seems like a helpless child, who just needs love and comfort. It's just adorable.

You giggle, which makes him raise his head to look into yours with his beautiful gaze. "What ?" He asks, completely lost. You hold back another laugh. "Nothing. You're just really adorable and cute, baby" He blushes violently at your words, as he nuzzles his head against your neck again to hide his pink cheeks. "C'mon, you don't need to hide. You know I like it when you blush"

He groans again before lifting his head to return his gaze to your face. You place a kiss on his cheek, while his eyes narrow, a sign that he is smiling. “So, do you prefer to be the little spoon or the big spoon ?” You finally ask. He pauses, taking time to think.

"Hmm... The big one. I like feeling you safe and warm in my arms. And what's more, I can admire the beauty of my baby" You raised your eyebrows slightly. “So you don’t like being the little spoon?” "That's not what I said" He said in defense, before diving his head back against your neck.

You end up falling asleep in each other's arms, Lando comfortably ensconced in your embrace as he smiles at the touch of your hand stroking his back and the other coming to play with his hair.

However, what you won't know is that he secretly admits that he loves being the little spoon. To feel your arms around him, to smell your sweet perfume, to feel your gentle caresses and your hands in his hair, to simply feel loved and safe in your arms. He'll never admit it but he loves this feeling more than anything in the world.

So after this day, this change of role, you will find him becoming the little spoon much more often than you thought. He will no longer be able to stop himself from coming to snuggle up against you, from nestling his head in the crook of your neck and leaving hundreds of kisses there, because after all there is no doubt about it : he secretly prefers be the little spoon.

#f1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #lando norris x reader #lando norris imagine #lando norris x y/n #lando norris x you #ln4 imagine #lando norris fluff

[the-acid-pear]

Had a huge fight w my grandma and what hurts is not as much what she says but how she refuses to acknowledge what she did was wrong. I'm so tired of that behavior. I'm so fucking tired.

#luly talks #my jaw HURTS #IT HURTS *BAD* #its so frustrating its so angering its 💥 #qnd you can see them in real time pushing you away and what you fucking do as you fight with teeth and nail to make them change #and they refuse #and what's CAN ONE FUCKING DO!!!!!!!!!! #WHAT CAN ONE DO PLEASE TELL ME SO PLEASE CAUSE I DONT KNOW ANYMORE #WHY AM I FORCED TIME AND TIME AGAIN TO BE PUT BETWEEN THE WALL AND THE SWORD WHAT CAN I FUCKKNHBG DOOOO !!!!!!!! #LIE???? I CANNOT LIE. AND I TELL THEM THE TRUTH AND THEY DONT LISTEN. I TELL THEM THAT THEY ARE HURTING ME AND THEY DONT LISTEN #AND ONE CANT STAY THEN. IF YOU WANT TO HURT ME I CANNOT STAY AND BE HURT. I CANNOT. ITS SO UNFAIR #IM SO ANGRY IM SO TIRED WHAT CAN I EVEN DO ABOUT THIS ANYMORE WHAT CAN YOU SAY TO SOMEONE THAT WONT LISTEN #you will cry you will scream you will do anything and they will just look at you like you aren't their kind #like you are a child throwing a tantrum #i can't do this shit anymore i dont know what to do it's too much man

[ladysharmaa]

My miracle

Anthony Bridgerton x reader

summary: Anthony’s wife is in labor and it’s not looking good

warnings: mentions of death

“Where is she?” the loud voice of Anthony was heard in the entire mansion. The door he opened slammed into the wall but he couldn’t care less as he saw some servants running his way to take off his coat. “Tell me where my wife is!”

“My apologies, my Lord.” the poor man trembled under the Lord’s menacingly glare, that were just a cover for the worry and fear that was running though his veins. “The Viscountess is in your chambers. The midwife and your mother are already present with her. Shall I inform your brothers to come and wait with you until the child is born?”

Anthony didn’t bother to respond. He quickly climbed the stairs, two steps at once, seeing with wide eyes as the maids ran to his room with towels in their hands. He doesn't even settle for knocking, immediatly opening the bedroom door. None of his mother's stories could have prepared him for the sight that lay ahead.

His darling wife was drenched in sweat, dressed in her nightdown. One hand was on her round belly protectively while the other was in his mother’s hands, who was whispering words of comfort. Her jaw was clenched in pain and it was only then that he noticed the midwife between the Viscountess legs. 

“You!” Y/n screamed accusingly, managing to point a finger at Anthony with hatred. “You did this to me! You will never ever put your hands on me again!”

“I-” Anthony was at loss of words. He knew that his wife was in pain, and looking like she was ready to kill, so he just nodded his head in agreement. He took slow hesitant steps towards the bed, hoping to comfort her without dying. “I’ll never touch you again, my love. How are you feeling?”

“How do you think I’m feeling? I’m pushing your child that inherited your big head out of my lady parts! So tell me, my dear husband, how am I feeling?”

“Like you are giving birth?”

“Anthony...” his mother whispered while shaking her head in dispair. “You should leave the room. Your brothers must be coming to keep you company. We shall call you when the child is born.” 

“I’m not leaving my wife.” was the only thing he said with firmity, holding Y/n’s hand and kissing her soft skin gently.

She turned to him, a change in her demeanor, eyes full of tears of terror. “I’m scared, Anthony. It hurts.”

“I know it hurts. It’s okay, love. You will be alright and then we will have our child with us.” he whispered. A feeling of guilt washed through him. How could he have made his wife suffer through childbirth? “You are the bravest person I know. So so much braver than me and everyone else. I’m so proud of you.”

"I can't do this. It hurts too much. Make it stop, Anthony, please." Y/n cried.

It was only then that Anthony saw the look in his mother. She was worried, exchanging looks with the midwife. And as much as the Viscount would like to also show his anguish, his first priority was to comfort Y/n. "It's going to be okay, my love. Just a little longer, you're being so strong."

But she no longer had the strength to respond. It was getting harder and harder to keep her eyes open and she just wanted to sleep to escape the pain. Between her legs, an increasingly larger pool of blood was forming. Anthony's eyes were wide and there was enormous pressure in his chest. It felt like I was running out of oxygen, and it only got worse when Y/n finally gave in to unconsciousness.

"What's happening?" he whispered, looking in alarm first at Violet. Afterwards, he turned to the midwife furiously. "What's wrong with her? Help her! Do something!"

"Anthony, you need to leave." Violet advised, trying to remain calm for everyone's sake. Anthony was becoming more and more desperate, tears falling from his eyes as he grabbed his wife's hand tighter and brought it to his lips.

"I'm not going anywhere!"

"Viscount Bridgerton, the baby is in pain. You won't want to see what I'm going to do. I promise I'll try to save both of them." the midwife said, taking a small knife and flying it over Y/n's stomach.

"If you need to choose, save my wife's life." Anthony begged, now more desperate as his mother called his brothers to take him out of the room.

"Anthony..."

"No, mother, you save my wife's life!" Benedict and Collin grabbed the man by the arms and began to carry him outside, despite Anthony's struggle. "You hear me! My wife is going to survive! Let me go! Mother, save Y/n!" he shouted before the door closed in his face. 

The last thing he saw was the woman making the cut on Y/n's stomach, who woke up with a jolt. She then let out a scream that would torment Anthony for the rest of his life.

With a cry of anger mixed with sadness, Anthony broke free from his brothers' grip and put his hands to his face. He didn't want to think about the possibility of losing the love of his life. He simply couldn't take it.

"Wow, Anthony, calm down." Collin whispered when Anthony, in a rage, threw a punch against the wall. "The Viscountess is a fighter. If anyone is capable of overcoming this, it's her."

"You don't tell me to calm down, Collin. Not when my wife is in that room fighting for her life over something I did." he cried, jaw shaking and eyes red that only showed the immense pain he was in. He sat on the floor, leaning his head back and looking at the ceiling. "I need her to live."

"And she will live, brother. I will bring a drink, and we will wait together for news." Benedict said, rushing to bring the alcohol when Y/n's screams became louder.

On one hand, each scream was like a stab in the heart of Anthony, who was increasingly pale and looked like he was going to vomit at any moment. On the other, it was the only way to know she was alive.

Moments passed. The Viscount didn't know if it had been seconds, minutes or hours. Things seemed to be getting mixed up in his mind. Nothing made sense, not when the love of his life was in the next room in pain and he was away from her. He had to protect her, it was his obligation as a husband. And he failed.

And then came the moment when Anthony's heart stopped. A baby's cry was heard, and he allowed himself to smile a little. He had a son or daughter. A mini version of his wife. And then he burst into tears when Y/n stopped screaming and everything became too silent.

It was uncontrollable. He cried without being able to stop, making it even difficult to breathe in. Anthony refused to believe that he would have to raise this child without Y/n. Without her affection, her kindness, her love. He didn't want to open his eyes and realize that all this wasn't a nightmare, but reality.

Benedict and Collin didn't know what to do. But one thing was certain, they would be there to help Anthony with whatever he needed and never let that child forget the wonderful mother he had. Then, Violet left the room holding a pile of blankets that held the baby.

"You have a daughter, Anthony."

He just cried more. His body was shaking and he couldn't even look at his mother and the baby. "Y/n... Is she...?" He took Violet's silence as a yes. "Oh god..."

"Enter the room, Anthony. She is waiting for you."

Anthony had never stood up so quickly in his life. He quickly opened the door, stopping momentarily when he saw the amount of blood on the sheets, but the most important thing was Y/n's half-open eyes. She was alive and looking around the room in confusion.

"Anthony? Where is my baby?" her voice was hoarse and extremely weak.

The man fell to his knees at the edge of her bed, and lowered his head to rest on her chest. A feeling of relief spread throughout his body when he felt the rising and falling movement of her chest, indicating that she was breathing and that it wasn't just his imagination.

"I love you so much." he cried, feeling her hands start stroking his hair. "I'm sorry. You were so brave and strong. I'm so proud of you, my love."

"Where is my baby?" Y/n didn't want to seem like she didn't appreciate Anthony's words because that was a lie. He was the most important person in her life. But at that moment, Y/n just wanted to know where her baby was.

"She's right here, dear." Violet reassured with a smile, announcing her presence.

Very carefully, she passed the child into the arms of her son's wife, her smile widening as the little family was finally together again. The new parents had a gentle smile as they looked at their creation, a new love emerging for this fragile human being.

Anthony kissed Y/n's temple. "We have a daughter."

"She is beautiful."

"She takes after her mother." Anthony quickly said, never feeling so much love as he did in that moment. 

He was extremely proud of Y/n admiring her strength and courage. Now, he was going to protect his two girls until the end of his life. Nothing was more important than his family.

#anthony bridgerton #anthony bridgerton x reader #anthony bridgerton x y/n #anthony bridgerton x you #Bridgerton #benedict bridgerton #benedict bridgerton x reader #bridgerton x reader #bridgerton x female reader #anthony bridgerton x female reader #bridgerton x y/n #collin bridgerton x reader #bridgerton imagine #anthony bridgerton x wife reader

[ladadiida]

𝐩𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 | 𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐣𝐢 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 (𝐬𝐧𝐞𝐚𝐤 𝐩𝐞𝐞𝐤)

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 as much as you wanted to stay by his side, you couldn't bear the thought of watching him fall in love with other women while you're stuck at the kitchen washing dishes and measuring ingredients. so you dreamt of leaving, of traveling to different islands to share your lovely songs and tunes; but the more your desire to leave grows, the more sanji finds himself drowning in your warmth. or, you and sanji over the years, wherein five times you tried to leave him and the one time you finally did, despite his refusal to let you go.

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬 musician reader, 5 + 1 things, pining, unrequited love, not actually unrequited love, angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, angst with a happy ending

𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 i swear i cannot escape a brainrot whenever i watch a new show. this automatically wrote itself, i don't even remember how i came up with this idea. anyway, i'm surprised there aren't many sanji fics that involves the unrequited love trope, seeing that it suits him. or maybe that's just me. this is only a SNEAK PEEK though.

𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭 full version now published here!

You accepted it years ago.

You accepted the fact that you somehow fell in love with Sanji Vinsmoke along your weird journey of working in a sea restaurant full of former pirates and making music while at it. How the pesky feelings grew and wrapped themselves around your aching heart, you didn't know. Maybe it was when he learned to cook your favorite food and gave it to you afterwards, or the way his crystal blue eyes reminded you of snowflakes every winter.

Or maybe it was when he pulled your hair out of jealousy the moment he learned that Zeff would be taking in another child in his care, but brushed it and even braided it after the latter cleared the misunderstanding. Maybe it was when he supported you in your dreams and told you they weren't silly, maybe it was when he fought off drunk men that were trying to hit on you. Or maybe it was the way his voice would drop an octave lower whenever he asks you for a favor. The list could go on and on and you still wouldn't know the reason why. It doesn't matter anyway. You tripped, you fell, and now you're pining.

Drying off the last of the plates, you washed your own hands after and patted them dry on your skirt. You were the last one to leave the kitchen, the other staff already back in their quarters after a long, exhausting day of cooking. You fixed the signature blue bandana tied in your hair then went on your way towards the upper deck.

You weren't blessed with a talent in cooking, so you offered to do chores instead. Washing the dishes, cleaning the restaurant, and doing the laundry were few of the things you do in the Baratie. You can't say that you enjoy it, but you were beyond grateful that Zeff gave you a chance despite his opposition to let a woman work inside his restaurant.

As you were about to go to the newly laundered clothes you hung on a thin wire earlier that morning, you heard two voices speaking. You also smelled cigarette smoke wafting through the air, and you only knew one person who could be smoking at this hour. Your breath hitched in anticipation.

"You bringing a woman to your bed again, Sanji?" The other person asked playfully, but there was a hint of disbelief in his voice. You carefully took a peek so you won't accidentally reveal yourself and be accused of eavesdropping. Two people came into view with their backs facing you.

"Now, what are you talking about, Patty? I am a gentleman. I only had a nice chat with the lovely lady and escorted her back to her ship." Sanji interjected, a cigarette hanging on his lips.

Patty huffed. "I didn't know that chatting included kiss marks on jawlines."

This caused Sanji to laugh and say, "Not my fault she was charmed by my food."

"The boss man ain't gonna like it when he finds out about this."

"He's not gonna find out." Sanji assured him, wiping off the said kiss mark on his jaw. You stared at him as he did so, and you pitied the woman who planted that kiss, knowing she was just one of the many beautiful ladies Sanji had flirted with before. However, a tinge of pain in your chest said otherwise, taunting you that it was not pity you're feeling, but foul jealousy.

"Why don't you look for more decent women, eh? How about 'little lass' for a change?" Patty suddenly suggested.

It was like someone had hit your stomach with one of the metal pans in the kitchen with the way it lurched in surprise and nervousness. Your heartbeat started to quicken the longer you waited for his response, making your grip on your skirt tighter. In moments like these, you allowed yourself to hope, to wish that he saw something in you and that he finds you beautiful and lovely enough to be the person standing by his side.

But his answer made all that hope crumble down into nothing but dust.

"I don't see her that way." Sanji said after a long stretch of silence, taking a long drag from the cigarette then releasing the smoke in a single breath.

Ah.

You blinked repeatedly, trying to keep the tears from forming. It's always been like this, so why can't you get used to it? Taking a deep breath, you gulped away the knot forming in your throat and decided to leave. You can grab the clothes later.

"You're too kind for him." Someone behind you spoke, making you jump and tense up. Turning around, you saw Zeff looking at you with an unreadable emotion in his eyes and his hands on his hips, almost like he knew your secret. Of course he does. He always sees everything.

You stumbled on your words. "Sir?"

"That boy is always up to something." He began, switching his attention to Sanji. "One minute he's stubbornly immature in the kitchen, and the next he'll be a thirsty man staring at women like they're liquid booze."

Clearing your throat, you forced a smile.

"Well, he can be a lot sometimes." You agreed, remembering the days when the two of you would fight over irrelevant matters. Then you chuckled and continued, "But he's kind. He's gentle, and lovely, like a freshly made poem you keep repeating in your head. But then he's also confusing, hot-headed, and reckless. He's like the sea, isn't he? Calm yet wrapped with mystery, dangerous yet beautiful..."

You trailed off, an unbearable heat rising up your cheeks and neck once you slowly began to realize that you just ranted out your feelings to the head chef. You glanced at him with wide eyes, preparing to see a disgusted look on his face; however, Zeff didn't appear to be repulsed by your little speech. In fact, the corners of his lips were slightly quirked up.

"But I cannot swim. If I were to drown, he wouldn't save me." You quickly added, hoping to shut down the topic.

He sighed. "You will meet someone who deserves you as much as you deserve them, little lass." He simply said. He then laid his hand out, and on his palm was a little box poorly tied with a ribbon. "Here, for you."

Altnough you were a bit confused at the random gift, you accepted it and cradled the box to your chest. "I'll be okay, Zeff." You insisted, grinning cheekily. "When I become famous, I'll sing my songs here in Baratie, and people would flood the restaurant to hear my singing. And to eat your food too, of course."

The head chef nodded, relief flooding his expression. "I look forward to that." He said while awkwardly returning your smile.

That night, when you were sure that everyone in the Baratie was asleep, you opened the loose floorboard on the floors of your bedroom and grabbed the wooden box you kept hidden for a long time now. You opened the lid and began counting the Berry you saved for the past few months.

Tomorrow was the perfect day to leave.

You just can't stay here. Yes, you had a roof over your head, delicious food to eat everyday, and clean clothes to wear but you were so miserable. This wasn't the life you wanted. You wish to go out there, sing your heart out, and fall in love with someone who actually loves you back.

A knock on your door made you freeze. You held your breath as the person on the other side continued to knock a few more times. "You awake?"

Pain surged through your veins, your chest twisting in agony. Sanji.

"You didn't come down for dinner. I guess you're too tired, hmm?" He said, his muffled voice gentle, and the sound almost prompted you to stand up and open the door for him. But you dug your fingernails in your palms and resisted, because you can't just let this opportunity pass by.

You heard a brief clinking sound before Sanji spoke again, "Sweet dreams, ange."

Once his footsteps faded away, you cautiously moved towards your door and opened it as quietly as you can. There, on the floor, was a small plate with a slice of your favorite dessert: angel's food cake, topped with fresh cream and strawberries.

You bent down and saw a note beside the plate. And when you got to read the contents of the note, you burst into tears and sobs that wracked down your entire body.

Happy Birthday

— S.

You ate the cake with tears silently falling down your cheeks, and that was the first time you failed to leave Sanji Vinsmoke.

again, this is only a sneak peek of the actual fic, i'm currently halfway in completing it. please let me know if you want to read it, because i might publish it next week. if not, i'll just drown in sorrow and self-pity.

#opla #opla x reader #opla x y/n #one piece #one piece live action #opla sanji #one piece sanji #sanji #vinsmoke sanji #sanji live action #sanji x reader #sanji x you #sanji x y/n #opla sanji x reader #angst #one piece sanji x reader #ਏਓ ladadiida

[dumb-fictionkin-sideblog]

suicide tw

I am usually against anyone contemplating suicide but also the more I think about me and how I interact with others, the more I can't help but realize that it is impossible for me not to be toxic in one way or another (if not worse), and it would take a lot less time and effort to just kill myself. I also wouldn't be inevitably hurting people during the process of getting better.

#sunny #i just think it would honestly make more sense and be more productive #1) i can't hurt anyone else if i'm dead #2) the people i've hurt in the past get to never have the risk of being hurt by me again #(+ they get to have the relief and happiness that my death would bring them in the first place) #3) the only people who would miss me would be one friend and my mom and honestly? i have been the worst child ever to my mom #she would probably be happier in the long run. and that friend *would* forget me and move on pretty quickly #because they have lots of friends themselves and i'm not as important to them as they are to me #4) the fear of fucking up my future will be gone. and i don't have to *care* about my future at all #all the anxiety i get from thinking of even planning my future will simply Not Be There Anymore #5) i can't be a creep if i'm dead! see multiple mental breakdowns about someone whom i haven't talked to in nearly a year #(+ the embarrassment of telling someone 'you're a great friend' in a moment of weakness even though i know that i am nothing to them) #(that'll be gone too!) #6) people *can* talk badly about me in ways i'd normally eventually know about it #(always a plus.) #7) generally who tf cares if i'm still alive or not by the end of the year. my class might even get their graduation with no exam! #yk that whole deal of 'if a student dies in the middle of the year the whole class graduates automatically' #that would be very cool actually. especially for one of my classmates who's really struggling #and finally 8) i know like 3 people anyway. my death would have exactly no impact on anything #so judging from the pros and cons. why not ! #vent #jesus i'm gonna have to tag this #suicide tw #tw suicidal thoughts #suicidal ideation tw #tw suicidal ideation #tw death #and eveything else blah blah blah

[yawnderu]

Lorelei — Simon ''Ghost'' Riley x Reader | Part I

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Synopsis: Aware of the way his lifestyle doesn't align with your dream life and unwilling to quit his life as a soldier, Simon breaks things off with you. It isn't until a year later that he sees you again, a tiny carbon copy of him held in your arms.

''So you're just goin' to sit there and tell me that isn't my daughter.'' Simon says bluntly, tone even yet carrying a snark hidden that you came to listen so many times after working with him— never once directed at you until now.

''It's really none of your business, Ghost.'' You don't even spare a glance at him, simply looking at your little girl, fingers gently running through her short hair. She looks exactly like Simon, though that will never take away your love for her.

''You're not denyin' it.'' He hesitantly sits down next to you, secretly afraid you'll bite his head off. The glare you shoot his way is enough confirmation that you would if you could. You sigh softly, the air leaving your lungs before being sucked back in, not wanting to argue in front of your little girl despite her not understanding words yet.

''Well, what's it to you? Why do you need to know?'' I can't handle you leaving me again.

''Don't be like that.'' His tone is soft, almost pleading. It has been over a year since he broke up with you, yet that doesn't make the loss any easier, not now that he knows he has a daughter, no matter how much you tried to hide it from him.

''Why didn't you tell me?'' He asks gently, feeling like he's walking on eggshells. It's the first time ever he feels that way with you, and he doesn't blame you in the slightest. It takes a few seconds of you thinking before you answer.

''I was terrified of you choosing to walk away from her... to be a deadbeat. I didn't want to have that image of you, because that would have hurt more than the break up.'' Your voice is more calm, though for all the wrong reasons. The familiar tingling all over your nose is back, eyes stinging as you try to hold back tears, too prideful to cry in front of him again.

''That's what you think o' me?'' He replies in nothing but pure disbelief and slight disgust. He would never walk away from his child, no matter how much that would destroy all the walls he has been building for years, stones upon stones carefully piled on top of each other, so strong nothing could ever break through— until you came along.

''I was fucking scared, okay?'' You look away and wipe your eyes with one hand, the other one carefully supporting the neck of the baby on your lap. Simon sighs, his bare hand hesitantly reaching down to trace the features of the tiny girl, being careful with her as if she would break if he applied any pressure. He notices your eyes glued to his hand, eyebrows furrowed. He's about to move his hand away until you adjust the little girl so he can touch her face without the awkward angle.

''Give me one more chance. Please— please, let me be a father to her.'' Simon never begged for anything, not even when he was tortured for months to no end, drugged, beaten like a dog, yet here he is; begging his ex for a chance to keep the girl in his life. You don't reply.

''I'll do everything I can. What I should've done. I want to be here, please.'' He was so damn ready to get on his knees and beg if that's what it took for you to let him be involved in her life. He's not asking you to be together— he knows he doesn't deserve that chance.

''She's looking at you like she knows you.'' Your response is ominous to say the least. You want to deny him, to tell him he doesn't even deserve to be able to touch the little girl you birthed alone, that he doesn't deserve the chance at a family after he destroyed 4 years of a relationship because of the very same thing, but... your little girl is looking up at him with pure admiration and curiosity in her big brown eyes, her tiny hand struggling to hold one of his fingers. Growing up with a single parent yourself, you know she deserves better, and you're willing to put your pride and pain aside to make sure she gets the world.

''Okay.'' You reply after taking a deep breath, holding it into your lungs for what feels like forever, choosing to ignore the strong arms wrapping around you, bringing all three of you close. It feels... right.

[NEXT]

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