#but I laughed so hard when she said that

[malenjoyer]

HI MALENJOYER I JS WANNA SAY I HAVE THE SAME ADAM WEST BATMAN FIGURE U GOT IN UR IG STORY!! (we are meant to be together)

You have to get the other three to complete the pact!!! (JK)

Very nice!! I wanted the Adam west one for a while but I got a duplicate of the Batman on the right here 😡

#I laughed so hard bc my friend brought the blindbox from Japan… she doesn’t know I’m crazy and got like… 6 #when it first came out at least.. I gave away Tim to my friend because they’re a Tim fan. I have babs in a box😟😣 sorry babs… #one day I may love batgirl as much as I love oracle.. but I must say it will be a hard battle #my bad for the flash.. it’s night time ok #are you the same anon that said ily before..

[queen0fm0nsterz]

Reading my fave thin man and lady fic. Kicking my feet a lot because tbh. Sometimes a sad man really is just a weird woman's science project in a way that is so homoerotic

#carols.txt #when i tell you i've been re-reading this single one shot religiously every single month for almost three years I mean it #《straight》 ship so good we call it queerbaiting #LMAOOOOOO #call it yaoyuri the way these old people r tragic and doomed by the narrative or whatever #listen as a bi person on the aroace spectrum whatever this fic was trying to convey really strikes a cord #while its not the same as my own this characterization of them is so intriguing. im so hooked on it #^^ one thing i think this person really nailed was thin man's immaturity (stemming from his emotions oftentime being too big to control) -> #and the desire of attention that comes with said immaturity while also having the lady be both cold (normal) and intrigued in a way that -> #that really fits her character. curiosity is one of the many facets that make up her character that don't get explored much and i think its #done so well here for like no reason💀 THIS AUTHOR COOKED TOO HARD YOU GUYS #like ofc she wouldnt send him away. shes studying him under a microscope. even though hes annoying as hell #thin man is plagued by sassy man syndrome in this which is really fucking funny cus it lasts a total of 3 seconds before she finds him out #PLUS THE TALK ABOUT THE TOWER AND THE WORLD... AUGHHH #i need this author to give me their brain NOW #AUGHHHHHAAGGGHEEHH #everyone needs to start doing thinlady the way this person was doing it #this is the biblically accurate old people (in case my theory abt baby lady having been in the pale city is wrong) #live laugh love. its my birthday. spoiling myself a bit. goddamn.

[junkosblunt]

Junko: "The most despair I have ever felt in my life was killing my sister."

Mukuro, in the afterlife: "JUNKO LOVES ME MORE! SUCK IT, YASUKE!"

no because i know mukuro’s weird ass was lowkey thrilled when junko murdered yasuke because it was one less person to steal junko’s attention away from her 💀

#😭😭😭 #like remember how excited she was to go back to junko’s room after everything was said and done and tried to make her laugh dndnxn #homegirl probably wanted izuru dead so bad lmfao #i have a whole thing about mukuro’s subconscious bitterness towards people who get junko’s attention and affection who aren’t her #because she believes that if anyone in the world deserves attention and affection from junko it’s her. like she’s earned it. #and in her mind she probably rationalizes that nobody else deserves junko’s affection because they don’t truly understand her #not the way mukuro does and she’s worked so hard to be someone junko loves and needs #it kills her to watch junko focus on other ppl when she’s right there practically begging to be acknowledged & shown love and appreciation #and it isn’t possessiveness. it’s bitterness. bitterness and hurt. #ofc most of this is festering beneath the surface in her subconscious more than it’s entering her stream of conscious thought #she wants to be the center of junko’s world like junko is the center of hers so badly it’s genuinely heartbreaking #but yes this a correct take lmao #mukuro ikusaba #junko enoshima #danganronpa #asked and answered

[princessamericachavez]

father and son

#911 fox #bless aisha's lives #also please i was laughing so damn hard when she realized #she spent all the live talking about 'oliver's episode' and then it hit them that monday is 6x10 and not 6x11 #also love how she said 6x11 is 'enlightening' hahaha #also also MY HEART Ryan Guzman actual professional actor turning tomato red whenever he's on an IG live #boy u do this for a living what???

[hella1975]

sometimes i think about the fact my grandparents literally overnight just cut us off and im like. how did u even do that. does it torment you

#eeaao's 'how did you let me go so easily' moment. like i dont let myself even THINK about this too often #bc i immediately beat myself back with the 'if it's hard for you then imagine how hard it is for mum. her PARENTS cut her off' #but like. idk. my nan i couldn't give less of a shit about which is something i always find so interesting #bc even as a child with NO basis for it or any understanding of her behaviour both past and present i still wasn't Comfortable around her #like children are smart actually. i just Knew her vibes were off and i Knew my mum was weird when she was around #like i truly dont think i ever loved my nan even when she was a very frequent part of my life #but my grandad? i ADORED him. id see him multiple times a week and he's the kindest man ive ever met #and hannah what i told you about my mum saying certain people have magnetic auras THAT WAS ABOUT HIM #like i cant actually put into words what it was about him but people just wanted to know him and spend time with him #but he was weak and let my nan walk all over him and when push came to shove he chose her and now ive not spoken to him in 3 years #& i KNOW he loved me. he thought the world of me like it's a bitter unspoken thing between me & my sister that we KNOW i was his favourite #he used to buy me egg butties at agricultural shows when my mum said no and specifically ask for two eggs #he used to sit and eat his soup with me when he came over to do work at the house #he used to play with me. he used to smile all the time. i can so clearly hear the way he'd go ''iya [my name]' with his proper rural accent #or how he'd tell anyone who would listen 'she's tough as old boots that one' #and i could make him laugh like NO ONE else could and he'd light up and go 'give over' and he genuinely enjoyed my company #i KNOW HE DID. and i havent spoken to him in 3 years. he'll be dead soon #and i cant talk to my mum about it bc it's her DAD it is so much worse for her and i cant talk to my sister about it #bc she wasn't close with him like i was and she just shuts the conversation down and those are the only two people #who know my grandad and know what he meant to me so im just here like. he literally stopped speaking to me overnight #i stopped hearing from him i stopped meeting up with him im so so angry with him the love is still there i dont know where to put it now #why couldnt he stay. why did he pick her when she's a loveless void of inhumanity. why werent we enough #hella goes home #my grandparents on my dad's side are also not in the picture funnily enough but idgaf about them. she got that grandparentless swag

[mymitochondriaforpresident]

The way I had to use every ounce of willpower in my soul to keep my face neutral when a patient I just saw told me they’ll be moving to Sweden in two days so no, they will not be making a follow-up appointment in our outpatient clinic. 🇺🇸🚫

#MAJSJSJSDJJDJDDJ #LITERALLY #I WAS TRYING SO HARD NOT TO LAUGH #and when i handed her paperwork i go ‘tell the Swedes I said hey.’ #discharge plan? SCANDANAVIA #and i WILL be adding in the dots in my patient note #you best believe #🇸🇪 #and the nurse was like does she need discharge instructions in swedish #and i go nah a lot of them speak english there #and she goes how the heck did you know that #the fear in my eyes lol #as i tried to lie #☠️☠️☠️ #young royals #wilmon #👩🏽‍⚕️💜

[sage-nebula]

I've decided to make my own post because I am not an idiot, but full disclosure that this post is 50% based on thoughts I was having while I was driving home from the auto repair shop yesterday and 50% a response to a post I saw just now that conflated "redemption arcs" (things fictional characters go through in fictional stories) with "community support" (things real life people offer to other real life people in real life) and how this relates to "fixing people" (making someone who mistreats or abuses themself or others not mistreat or abuse themself or others anymore).

Read my words very carefully.

In fiction, it is more than okay to like whatever type of toxic or fantastical relationship you want. If you like to read stories about toxic, codependent people who are absolutely horrible to one another and will never, ever change, you read those stories. If you like to read stories about a tortured man who just needs The Right Person to teach him to be better, and then he is, sometimes exclusively only to them though, then you read those stories. Sometimes you want to read stories where the main character says "I can fix him" and fails spectacularly, and sometimes you want to read stories where the main character says "I can fix him" and succeeds spectacularly, and either way, you read whatever stories you want, whatever makes you happy, I'm sure it's somewhere in this vast Archive that we call Our Own.

However, in real life?

First of all, "arcs" aren't things real life people have. An arc is something that has a beginning, a middle, and an end. Real life people don't have those, because our stories don't end until we die. Unlike a character, whose life presumably continues even after their story ends (except in circumstances where they die at the end but you know what I mean), we have to keep living day by day, with all the rises and falls that come with it. Now, this does not mean that a person cannot change, or that a person can't get better and learn from their mistakes; but it DOES mean that we can't have a "redemption arc" where we complete a checklist of story beats and then suddenly we're a better person who has experienced the necessary growth to be forgiven. First off, no amount of growth or change ever requires any victims to forgive. And second, that's just not how life works. That's not how change works. Change and growth are baby steps taken each day, and sometimes you go backwards, and you get angry with yourself, but then you pick yourself up and you try again the next day, and the next, and the next. It's an ongoing journey that does not end until you die. That's life.

But second and more importantly, the real idea that I think the original post was trying to get at, but missing the mark on was . . . okay.

So, the original OP of the post (and the person who replied to OP) got angry at the idea that the strawman they had invented (the person who had theoretically said "you can't fix him!") would deny support to someone who needs that help to grow and change as a person. The person who had replied in support of OP added that the strawman clearly believed in punitive justice over rehabilitative justice as well. On the surface, I can see where they are coming from. After all, on the whole humans are a social species and do need support networks in order to not only thrive, but survive. People such as drug addicts need support and assistance in order to get into better places in their lives, and the prison system has been proven to be far less effective at preventing repeated offenses than rehabilitative programs. This is all true.

However.

The reason why "you can't fix them" is still true, and needs to be said and understood particularly by those who are susceptible to falling into abusive relationships (e.g. people who have been abused before, particularly in childhood or adolescence) is because of free will. Specifically, the free will that each of us has, but specifically the other person. Person A can want so, so, so badly to "fix" Person B so that they stop being an abusive alcoholic 75% of the time. But if Person B doesn't actually want to stop being an abusive alcoholic (even if they say they do during the 25% of the time they aren't smacking Person A around), and refuses to put in the work that it takes to become sober and be a better person, then guess what? Nothing Person A does will ever make them be a sober, non-abusive partner. They will be unable to fix Person B. It doesn't matter how much time, energy, money, or commitment they pour into that person. It doesn't matter how much they genuinely, honestly, earnestly love them. Because unless Person B wants to change, and will put the work into doing so, then they will not change, and Person A, for their own health, safety, and sanity, needs to exit that relationship.

Now, does that mean that if, ten years down the line, Person B decides they are ready to put in the work to get their alcoholism under control, no one should help them? Of course not! They should absolutely be put in touch with sober counselors, support groups, medical professionals, friends and family who can help them. Person A could potentially forgive them, if Person A chooses. But that willingness to change and put in the work has to come from within Person B first.

I've been in the position where I've seen people in awful situations just tanking their lives, people I loved and cared about, people I begged to just listen to me and get help, only for them to not . . . and ultimately I had to accept that I couldn't fix them. I could be there to offer support when they were ready to fix themselves, but the core work that needed to be done had to come from within themselves. I couldn't provide that. Not because I was inadequate, not because I didn't love them, but because I couldn't force them to do anything they didn't want, or weren't ready, to do.

So at the end of the day, "you can't fix them" isn't about not giving support. It's about recognizing your limitations as a human being. It's about knowing that:

You cannot force someone to do something they do not want to do.

You cannot force someone to do something they are not ready to do.

Not being able to help or save someone is not a moral failing of yours.

Not being able to help or save someone does not mean you do not love or care about them.

Providing support should never come at risk of your own health and safety, physical or otherwise.

When you love someone, it can be really hard to accept this. You think, "I know I can make them want to try. I know I can inspire them to want to change. I know they love me, so if I just love them a little harder, they will want to change." Nine times out of ten, though, that is just not true. And if someone is abusing you, it is not worth the literal risk to your life to keep trying. You are worth more than that. You are more than just someone else's band-aid.

Keep yourselves safe in 2024.

#not an abuse scenario but: my mom died of covid-19 #it's relevant to this discussion bc she was a trump-supporting republican who refused to get vaccinated #bc the far-right propaganda shows she watched told her the vaccine ''wasn't a real vaccine'' #and i know this bc when i literally BEGGED MY PARENTS to get the vaccine my mother LAUGHED IN MY FACE and TOLD ME ''it's not a real vaccine #so anyway both my parents got it. my father almost died from it #my mom seemed like she was doing much better . . . except she CONTINUED to smoke heavily while both having covid #and recovering from covid #and once again i said hey don't you think you should not smoke cigarettes while recovering from a serious respiratory disease #and once again she laughed at me #anyway 2 months later her heart gave out in her sleep and she died #bc her body couldn't handle the stress of the cigarettes + alcohol (she was also an alcoholic) after covid had done its thing to her #she was only 56yo #so this was a case where i wanted to fix my mother. i tried so hard. and i've similarly tried to fix my father (who is still alive) #but i can't! my dad almost died and my mom DID die and my dad STILL won't get the vaccine #I HAVE BEGGED THIS MAN. WHO IS NOW 73. TO GET VACCINATED. AND HE STILL WILL NOT. #you can't fix people!!! you can't!!! you can offer them support if they want to fix themselves #you can help them fix themselves but you can't fix them. you just can't. no matter how much you love them #and in abuse cases it can be really fucking dangerous to keep trying. #anyway. that's my TED talk. thanks for attending or w/e it is they say

[thecowboykatsuki-anon]

#I took a little nap in my bathtub after dragging all my blankets in there #and my roommate came in to check on me and she said it took everything in her not to wake me when she realized where I was #she had to leave she was laughing so hard #my tummy is sore now but I definitely think I’m done with the worst of it #I’ll be brave about it now #also she just sent me the pic she took of me in the bathtub and it’s so funny I might post it

[girlcrushau]

#me? about to use tumblr as a diary again? in 2024? unfortunately:/ #but here have a waterfall i saw on a hike last week as payment #i am sO tired and exhausted emotionally after dating #there's this guy that i fr thought was going to last and be around for a long time. we spent like every moment together that we could for 2 #months straight and if we werent physicaly together we were texting or calling or on ft . just every part of our day had the other in it #not once did i ever feel unwanted undesired or uncared for. not once did i feel that i wasnt sure of his intentions. i felt safer with him #in those 2 months than i ever did with any one else i could think to compare to. #until one day he just didnt think it important to communicate any more. after 3 days of nearly nothing .. hardly any talking . i asked if #he was ok if we were ok. what was going on in his head. he said some ive just been with my buddies and family and havent been on my phone #and just. immediately thats heartbreak yanno. thats :// thats what they say when theres a new girl. but there'd never been a reason to think #there was another girl so i was like ok we're gonna trust bc this dude has been So good in every way. so i said imy but i understand. enjoy #your time with your buddies and with your fam -- i cant wait to hear about it (and hold you) #and i havent heard from him in the 3 weeks since. just randomly #so last night #i send the dreaded 'i miss you' text. #i dont expect to hear back and i accept the hurt that will come with that and the confusion that i've felt settles deeper into my heart #until this afternoon i hop on ig and see a hard launch that was posted an hour after my text was sent #that shit kinda hurt different. but also sent me into a bit of a delirious state where all i could do is laugh bc are you for fucking real #did she see my message? i know it. bc i know him and i know that he wouldnt hide anything from the person he's giving his heart #and his softness to. i can almost imagine how he showed her and promised her theres nothing to worry about #and there really isnt anything to worry about because he genuinely is the type to give his all to the relationship he's in #which feels silly to say after what happened w us. like no there wasnt a title ever #it sucks to call it a situationship because a month ago we were laughing in bed together about how we could never bc we were all in. #just the timing of the hard launch makes me giggle. did my text push them to have a conversation about what they are. was she really the #reason that he went away on me. #im trying not to blame myself . trying not to think about the phone calls i didnt answer. about what i could have done differently. trying #not to think about where we would be if i didnt let my anxieties hold me back. if i wasnt scared about what he'd think of the parts of me #that i keep hidden just a little bit longer than the rest. #and at the same time im trying not to put him on a pedestal. but that pedestal is just where i wholeheartedly believe he belongs #he set the bar for me. he set the standard. i was never too much. i was never too little. he made me feel perfect just as i am

[vimbry]

me and the work girlies having socialist convos at the end of the day

#funny as hell like. we finished our workload about half an hour early #because they've hired so many of us temps. who are improving at the job each day #that there's just been less to spread around #yet bc work culture is dumb our manager suddenly told everyone to push the carts we'd already sorted #into a square in the middle of the floor? which we've never done before #and the permanent staff had no idea why either. they were also confused but resigned #I passed one and said ''hey so is this just because we have 20 minutes of the shift left'' #and she just laughed and shrugged and was like idk ask him lmaooo #definition of busywork #so we're all just standing around for 10 minutes until the manager starts calling people over to move... other stuff idk. #and I'm walking to join them when this small group of coworkers behind me goes HEY #you don't need to go. look he's got enough people and he's not looking stay heeere #so we just end up swapping stories about the managers giving us tips to process the conveyer faster #even tho we uhhh work SO hard already. :) #and one woman went ''I was thinking. ummm. I could go faster. but you gonna pay me more??? so I worked slower ❤️'' #nothing but respect for us grunts here tho vs the management. I've never known a single person in the 3 weeks I've been here #to not come and help someone who looks busy on the opposite conveyer when theirs is slow #turns out people are naturally nice and helpful when you don't take advantage and try and make them work harder #bosses will never learn this <3

[noisolpxe]

getting they/them'd at build-a-bear yesterday was so funny i keep thinking about it

#the person checking us out had their pronouns (he/they/she) on their nametag but the person who they/them'd me didnt LMFAO #★ #ik its bc people short circuit when they see someone who presents masc with long hair but it never fails to be a lil funny to me #like ive also been called ma'am or miss or been she/her'd by ppl and then i speak or take down my mask and theyre like WAIT IM SO SORRY!! #and im always like. its fine its honestly funny and amusing ur view of gender is so narrow u see me & assume bc my hair i must be nonbinary #its funny in the way of if i think too hard about it i'll be sad so i just have to laugh about it #ik my dad went thru the same thing when he had long hair despite being a broad shouldered 6'4'' man #he said it happened esp in the bathroom dudes would think they were in the women's bc they'd see him from behind djdjdhjf

[faggotwalkwithme]

dude 2days french class is so funny.

#shut up mars #its our last class for the semester #and we did like a blind auction using fake euros #and one of my classmates got like a box but when she opened it #it was just empty with ONE PLAIN BISCUIT #AND A STICKY NOTE THAT SAID 'I LOVE YOU' #AND NOBODY WAS ADMITTING TO BEING THE ONE WHO GAVE THE GIFT #THEN AT THE VERY END THERE WAS ONE LEFT AND IT WAS WRAPPED USING A4 PAPER REALLY SHITTILY #AND IT WAS LIKE TWO PACKETS OF BISCUITS #THE SAME FUCKING BISCUITS #AND WE ASKED IF IT WAS FROM MY TEACHER AND HE WAS LAUGHING SO HARD HE WAS CRYING #HE GOT THE BISCUITS #THEN AFTER WE ASKED HOW MUCH IT COSTED #AND HE JUST LAUGHED HE DIDNT SAY ANYTING #THEN LATER THE GIRL THAT WON THE PACKETS OF BISCUITS ASKED WHETHER OR NOT HE MADE THEM #AND HE JUST LIED HE SAID HE DID BUT HE CLEARLY DIDN'T BCS THEY WERE WRAPPED IN LIKE PLASTIC PACKAGING #HES SO FUCKING FUNNY IM GONNA CRY

[lunaetis]

the moment william moriarty said " catch me if you can, mr holmes. " i have died and ascended to heaven. pupper is now ghost pupper. thank you for coming to my ted talk.

#.ooc #.mobile #.hina watches m.oriarty the patriot #[ i WENT ' FUCK ' AND SQUEAKED SO LOUD MY FRIEND WAS LAUGHING HER ASS OFF #BUT SRSLY WHEN A JAPANESE VA #SAID THAT LINE IN PERFECT ENGLISH #I AM FUCKING DEAD #MY FRIEND WAS LAUGHING SO HARD SHE ENJOYS ME SIMPING FOR MORIARTY & MORAN I S2G ]

[hella1975]

yes im trying not to be so mean yes im working on my temper but under no section of my Healing Contract does it mention that these things must apply to my sister. in fact if you read the fine print it says im actively allowed to make her miserable. for my mental health

#she's so mean all the time like constantly telling me im stupid and shit #which probably didn't hit as hard before this econ degree but now every time she does it im just kinda like :/ #and i laugh it off obvs bc am i fuck about to look put out by it #so she genuinely doesnt have any reason to stop bc ive not set any boundaries or communicated or yk. done anything correctly #i instead just let it frustrate the fuck out of me until one day im in a bad enough mood that i'll give as bad as she does #which i HATE bc as tough shit as she thinks she is i always think being mean - specifically the primary school way she does it - #is SO embarassing as a conflict method like girl 'you're stupid' is really the best you can come up with? bffr 😭 #like when i say IM mean and SHE'S mean im talking about very different things #im mean less often than her but when i do it it's effective bc i literally catalogue people's insecurities and use them against them #like some fucking anime villian like it's actually uncomfortable to watch and i hate myself every time #whereas her way is effective bc it's all dumb comments ANYONE could make but she says them repeatedly until she wears you down #and of the two methods they're both shit but at least my way isn't cringe LMAO #so if i ever get so frustrated i revert to her method i just get v annoyed with myself like IM better than this she might not be but i am #and we've just been moving things in the garden with mum which is a flashpoint anyway #and me and my sister were just GOING at each other and it was all jokes until i said something she didn't like #and she was like 'what's your problem? it's fine when we're joking but you always take it too far' girl. #like i cannot accurately explain on here how ridiculous that statement is coming from HER #and if id said something actually horrible id get it but the convo was literally just #her: mum can i wear your watch for the chem ball coming up? #me: why do you need a watch for that? #her: ive got a dumb tan line on my wrist that i want to cover #me: i really dont think anyone is going to be looking at your wrists #THAT WAS IT LMFAO??? YOU HYPOCRITICAL LITTLE BITCH #ironically i had a field day with it like her saying that was the worst thing she could have done #latched onto it like a bloodhound fr my eyes must have lit up #i was like 'dont be such a baby' which is basically a fucking trigger word in our house #thought she was gonna hit me with a spade <3 peace and love on planet earth #godddddd i cant wait for her to go back to uni i HATE sharing a room i cannot escape her she's literally here as i type #i hope she knows im slagging her off to my niche online micro-community #hella goes home

[ccomilk]

i love my coworker but sometimes i am very suddenly reminded that she is a rich white private highschooler who still hasn’t left that bubble yet

#coffee talks #we’ll be having a great time and then she’ll just say the darndest thing #also she keeps kind of implying that i’m too kindhearted bc i’m not suspicious of certain customers???? #as if i’m naive?? love you queen but i’m just trying not to profile people #like she tells me to watch out when visibly poor or drugged people come in #or like. groups of teenagers laughing #but then says she trusts private school boys not to steal bc ‘they have enough money’ #which. is so ironic when she implies i’m naive about people #it’s just. sigh #usually she’s fine but it’s just Some Things that pop out and give me pause #but she’s still just in highschool so it’s hard to really get someone out of that bubble #and there was just. a certain comment she made about a group of indigenous boys that came in today #she said it wasn’t bc of that but i don’t think she really understands that the context of who she’s saying it about changes the impact

[sunflowervolum-6]

Why did my dads rivals son just follow me??

#i didn't realize he was HIM #he posted his dad and i was like OHMYGOD #i showed it to my mom and she laughed so hard😭😭😭 #she just said omg dont tell this to your dad while laughing #im so telling him when he gets home tho #what is my life