#but I like the idea of feysand and nessian babies growing together

[myfriendscallmeraba]

When nyx is little and nessian has a daughter no one can take him away from her. He deems it his duty to always be by her side. Everytime they have to leave the house of wind Feyre and Rhys need to drag him away. But for a 10 year old Nyx is surprisingly resilient. He has always liked playing with the shadows and darkness but now he decides to use them. So Nyx uses them to disappear and every time Rhys starts worrying while Feyre just laughs. Nyx is always found next to the baby.

#I know nessian won’t have kids for a while #but I like the idea of feysand and nessian babies growing together #like imagine precious Nyx always next to the best #hugging her #playing with her #adorable😭 #nyx archeron #feysand #nessian #acosf #rhysand #nesta archeron #feyre archeron #cassian #nessian baby #acotar headcanon #headcanons #acotar

[feysandfeels]

Which TS songs remind you of the different couples in SJM’s books???

Boy do I ??

You are a blessed soul for asking me this, and know that I adore you. 

There is now a part II to this.

Feysand:

Begin Again: “I've been spending the last eight months Thinking all love ever does Is break and burn, and end But on a Wednesday in a cafe I watched it begin again” Baby Feyre finding that love is not toxic, that love is supportive, that love can be wonderful. “You said you never met one girl who had As many James Taylor records as you But I do” but think of is as “he said he never met a girl who wasn’t afraid of his power, but i do”. Also also “Walked in expecting you'd be late But you got here early and you stand and wave I walk to you” because Feyre’s used to T*mlin’s mediocre ass but Rhys surprised her by being a decent human and treating her with respect, which makes her realize that she was starved for respect and that T*mlin was not giving her what every decent human being should get from the get go from their partner.

Ivy: Feyre slowly falling in love with Rhys, thinking about Rhys in the Spring Court between Night Court visits Also throughout ACOMAF how she battles with her ever growing feelings for the Lord of the Night, while feeling guilty about T*mlin, because they *just broke up*: “Oh, goddamn My pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand Taking mine, but it's been promised to another Oh, I can't Stop you putting roots in my dreamland My house of stone, your ivy grows And now I'm covered in you” and “I wish to know The fatal flaw that makes you long to be Magnificently cursed He's in the room Your opal eyes are all I wish to see He wants what's only yours”.

End game: I can practically see Rhys singing this in the shower thinking about Feyre, when she decided to work with him and him thinking like “YES THIS HAS TO BE A SIGN”. His reputation precedes him and in rumours he’s knee deep, him and Feyre would be a big conversation, he has enemies, he has heard about her and she has heard about him. He thinks “she’s so dope that he might overdose”. She’s been calling his bluff on all his usual tricks so here’s the truth from his red lips!!!!!

Dress: “Even in my worst times, you could see the best in me Flashback to my mistakes My rebounds, my earthquakes Even in my worst lies, you saw the truth in me And I woke up just in time Now I wake up by your side My one and only, my lifeline”. Need I say more? I think not your honor. 

Call it what you want: “I said you don’t need to save me, but would you run away with me?” That’s Feyre’s whole arc, I rest my case.

Nessian: the happiness I feel about the fact that these two are together is just enough to make me smile on a Monday

False God - The song literally opens up saying “We were crazy to think Crazy to think that this could work Remember how I said I'd die for you” HELLOOOO?? NESTA THINKING ABOUT THAT SCENE IN ACOWAR?? but also feeling that she’s unworthy of Cassian and that there is no way in hell that he will love her with all that she is.

Don’t Blame Me - The power of this song lies in the I unapologetic- powerful-full on I give myself to you and I will do it over and over again energy it has. And this is the energy that Nesta has for Cassian (even when homegirl really tries to pretend otherwise lol boo you tried). The “through your love I found salvation” religious aspect of Don’t blame me is Nesta, because through Cassian’s love and presence she found the perspective she needed on herself. Also this book was a religious experience for me. Jesus fuck.

Sparks Fly: From Cassian to Nesta, with love. First of all Cassian would be a diehard swiftie (all of the bat boys for that matter, merch a the concert, what will we do if we get invited to the rep room?? fans. Az woud be like the quiet yet “no, speak one ill word of Taylor and that’s your end, she did nothing wrong she was framed and I have evidence”). Second of all “The way you move is like a full on rainstorm And I'm a house of cards You're the kind of reckless that should send me running But I kinda know that I won't get far” That’s him alright, that’s him knowing that Nesta is a force to be reckoned with and he wants nothing nothing but to be in that storm and live within the force of nature that she is. Thirdly “My mind forgets to remind me, your a bad idea You touch me once and it's really something You find I'm even better than you, imagined I would be I'm on my guard for the rest of the world But with you I know its no good And I could wait patiently But I really wish you would” 

Elucien: This is an Elucien blog. 

Lover - In all honesty wanted to give this song to Feysand, because they are my main otp and this song is the highest of the high from Taylor, but I can’t deny the fact that this song screams Elucien. “With every guitar string scar on my hand” I think is a beautiful parallel for Elain and gardening, “My heart’s been borrowed, and yours has been blue” this speaks of Gr*yson and Jesminda, “I loved you three summers now but I want them all” that’s Lucien speaking ma’am. “Have I known you 20 seconds or 20 years?”, both of them about the bond. “And you'll save all your dirtiest jokes for me and at every table, I'll save you a seat, lover” we all know Lucien has a mind for dirty jokes and sass and Elain would always save him the sit next to her because he is the one who truly saw her and, in his distance, was the presence she needed while she figured it all out. Finally, The fact that the song has very clear wedding tones I think fits the headcanon, that more than a mating ceremony, Elucien would have a wedding, because it feels like something Elain would feel more comfortable with. 

Treacherous -“I can't decide if it's a choice Getting swept away I hear the sound of my own voice Asking you to stay”..... mmmmmm is this or isn’t it Elain getting closer to Lucien, but still wondering if it’s the bond or her, yet nonetheless surrendering to the fact that she wants him to stay. “This slope is treacherous This path is reckless This slope is treacherous And I, I, I like it” Elain doesn’t want an easy love, to simple do as the bond suggests she wants something that has twigs and branches and where she needs to question herself and truly ask what she wants out of life and this relationship. Also the softness of the melody juxtaposed with the vulnerability, brings a soft rawness that is Elain. 

King of my heart: Neither of them expected to feel like they could love with all the hope and unapologetic free falling feel characteristic of first loves, yet here we are. They rule their kingdom inside the room because they are discovering their feelings for each other away from prying eyes and people that have expectations on how they should work with the mating bond and all that. “Late in the night, the city's asleep Your love is a secret I'm hoping, dreaming, dying to keep Change my priorities The taste of your lips is my idea of luxury” Again, with the love away from everyone, feeling their world shift around what they are starting to feel for one another. “Is the end of all the endings? My broken bones are mending With all these nights we're spending” did we say healing arc through love and support an “not expecting anything to come off this, but I just want to see you well” à la sjm?? I THINK WE DID.

Emorie: I’m working with crumbs here, delicious crumbs that will make a delicious emorie cake, but crumbs nonetheless.. I need more and I need it now.

I think he knows - My girl Emerie crushing hard hard haaaaaaaaard on Mor.

Cruel Summer - “I don't wanna keep secrets just to keep you And I snuck in through the garden gate Every night that summer just to seal my fate (oh) And I screamed for whatever it's worth "I love you, " ain't that the worst thing you ever heard” this is prime PRIME PRIME ANGST, we will get from these two.  

Gwynriel: this is an edit because I'm not a hoe for these two (yet...trust me once I see Az heal this is the tag where you will find me) and I did not know which songs might fit them and then when I posted it I was like WAIT WAIT I KNOW.

Gold rush - Gwyn talking herself out of her crush on Az after finding out about the whole necklace and being like “I don’t want a gold rush”.

Daylight - Az is a Taylor hoe first, spymaster second. She just makes him feel things. But in all seriousness “Like daylight It's golden like daylight You gotta step into the daylight and let it go Just let it go, let it goI wanna be defined by the things that I love Not the things I hate Not the things that I'm afraid of, I'm afraid of Not the things that haunt me in the middle of the night I, I just think that You are what you love” this is Az healing and being in better place where he can reflect on how he used to relate to love and romantic relationships, he now understands that love is not black and white but golden. He stepped into this notion of love and through it he found a beautiful relationship with Gwyn, he wants to be defined by the love he feels for her and the love he feels for his family, not by the things that haunted him, not by his mistakes, not by his trauma. He is golden, he is daylight, shadows and all he is daylight. 

Az + Elain: As a romantic end game they are not my ship, but I do stand by my pre-acosf position that these two would be really good friends

Out of the woods -  Where we stand after acosf I say that it is not far fetched that they might hook up and then realize that it’s not for them and that experience helps them access a new part of their healing: “They lost each other, but they found themselves”. The anxiety that this song mirrors is the anxiety of them knowing something doesn’t quite *fit* right, that they are both in turbulent times emotionally and this relationship is not giving them the peace they thought it would. They are paper airplanes, because they know that it’s not the right call for where they are in their own journeys if they want to heal properly and that neither will get what they truly want from the other one. The monsters who turned out to be trees, they are in the woods in this relationship, they were built to fall apart.. are all images that speak of the dynamic we could see of them, they try it doesn’t work and then after, when they are in better places mentally they will look back and be like “we dodge a bullet there didn’t we”.

Bonus: His necklace hanging around her neck, the image is clear there and so is the commentary. 

Az + Mor: formerly known as Moriel, the ship that used to reign my heart

Breath - This song is entirely from Az’s perspective once he and Mor talk about, well, everything. This is not how he had planned it, this is not how he wanted this to go, but “people are people and sometimes it doesn’t work out, but it’s killing me to see you go after all this time” referencing letting go of the romantic feelings he had for her. They were a crutch for him and now he has to face life and the things that torment him about it, without the protection and comfort his crush on her offered him. “And we know it's never simple, Never easy Never a clean break, no one here to save me You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand,” regardless of what you all want to think, they do love and know each other but shift in their dynamic will mean an adjustment for both of them... it’s not a clean break. “Never wanted this, never wanna see you hurt Every little bump in the road I tried to swerve”, also Idc about what you all think, Az never never never wanted to hurt Mor, if he knew his behavior was in someway affecting her he would have done something, and I think from the aftermath of him going after Eris on ACOWAR we can see that... also this might allude to him actually knowing that Mor is a lesbian and he has tried to make sure she feels safe around him and knows that he has her back agains the whole world if need be, regardless of her lack of romantic feelings for him. 

Feyl*n: honestly who knew there would be so many songs that would fit these two. Such bops for a crappy dude like T*mlin.

Exile - “I never learned to read your mind (never learned to read my mind) I couldn't turn things around (you never turned things around) 'Cause you never gave a warning sign (I gave so many signs)” He never even tried to learn to read her mind, he never turned things around and she gave so so many signs. The way he looks at Rhys like he’s his understudy, but no sugar he’s the principal actor and you got fired.

Getaway car - and I oop. Because that is essentially what they were both to each other. Feyre needed someone to give her security and financial stability, T*mlin needed someone to break the curse: “It was the best of times the worst of crimes”.

Bad blood - LOOOOOL. They used to be mad love and now they have bad blood.

Tell me why -  Imma just leave a collection of quotes here that well allude to them through the first act of ACOMAF: “I took a chance, I took a shot And you might think I'm bulletproof but I'm not You took a swing, I took it hard And down here from the ground, I see who you are” Feyre seeing T*mlin for the abusive person that he is, from the ground.. where his behavior put her. Also “I'm sick and tired of your reasons I got no one to believe in You tell me that you want me, then push me around And I need you like a heartbeat But you know you got a mean streak Makes me run for cover when you're around Here's to you and your temper Yes, I remember what you said last night And I know that you see what you're doing to me Tell me why” The if he loved me, why did he do it and the “it’s not a question of if he loved you but how” conversation she has with Rhys.

I could go on and on forever placing all T-Swift songs around acotar characters, but I think this is getting longer than we all anticipated.. or did we? we all know I am not ✨concise✨. Anywho, thanks for sticking around.

Besos!!

BOOOONUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSS:

Obviously, Invisible String is for all my mated/soon to be mated boos, and I think Peace is a song that can apply to both Feysand and Nessian from Rhys’ and Nesta’s perspectives respectively. 

#Feysandfeelsasks #Taylor Swift #Sarah J Maas #SJM #ACOTAR #ACOMAF #ACOWAR #ACOSF #Feysand #Nessian #Elucien #Emorie #not to toot my own horn but I think the Daylight one with Gwynriel is amazing #I will pat myself on the back. #Gwynriel #Moriel #and when I tag moriel i mean friendship moriel

[rufousnmacska]

This started as a late night-waiting for my laundry to get done-reading too many acosf posts on tumblr brain storm that I sent to @propshophannah and @itach-i and they helped expand on it.

Here’s what I wish the next two books were about** —

Acotar 5 is a spies/enemies to lovers book featuring Mor. It’s mostly set while she is doing whatever she was doing in Vallahan during acosf. On the surface she’s there to make an alliance. But really, she’s spying and gathering all the info she can about Koschei. To do this she pretends a friendship with Vallahan’s spymaster. That their spymaster is a beautiful, mysterious female is not a problem. Until Mor realizes the flirting has become serious and is no longer a game. Maybe they succumb to the attraction, but it’s “just sex.” While Mor tries to navigate her growing feelings for the female, she’s trying to gather intel on koschei, the real villain behind almost everything she and her friends have endured. Maybe the spymaster is the king’s daughter and as she grows closer to Mor and realizes how dangerous koschei is (and her father for wanting to ally with him) she goes against her training, her kingdom, and family and helps Mor find what she needs. That’s when Mor knows she can trust her and admits her feelings. It ends with Mor returning to the Night Court with her intel, and her girlfriend helping to get allies against koschei on the continent. During the book, when she’s traveling back and forth to the NC and realizing she loves this female, she gains the confidence to address the thing with Cassian and Az and there’s some resolution to it.

Maybe we get a novella in between. I honestly don’t know what it could be about. Az gets therapy so he’s in a place to be in a relationship with someone? Or we get some backstory to actually make koschei a multidimensional villain? Or an Eris/Lucien story and that sets up where they are at the start of book 6?

Acotar 6 is a multi-POV book like KoA where they go up against koschei. Feysand and the baby stay home (their dumbass death pact makes their direct involvement impossible), maybe Amren too (solely because she annoyed me in acosf lol.) So we’ve got: Nesta, Cassian, idk maybe some Illyrians and a unit of Valkyrie (with Gwyn and Emerie, who now officially wield two of Nesta’s made blades while she has the sword and dread trove), Mor who meets up with her girlfriend, Jurian, Vassa, Lucien, Elain, and Az. Maybe Eris, who is now high lord of Autumn after he helps his mom kill Beron. Lucien’s real parentage has come out and he’s now heir to Day. Maybe some other high lords, Drakon and Miryam... idk. Whoever wants to go lol. There’s lots of angst and love pentagram drama. During the journey to find koschei’s heart and kill him we get resolution to the various remaining ships. (I don’t care who ends up together as long as everyone ends in a good place.) With his newly awakened Day powers, Lucien frees Vassa, the others are all battling koschei’s armies, and Elain and Nesta join forces again to kill the big villain. Nesta uses the dread trove and by some unexplained magic destroys it so it’ll never be used again.

Everyone survives (sjm doesn’t have it in her to kill off a main character) and returns home. Mor’s girlfriend has been shunned by her family and moves to the NC. She and Az become friends and share spy secrets. Nessian is nessian - they bicker and have loud sex and go back to training armies. And most importantly, all that Rhys as high king bullshit is never mentioned again since there are no cauldron made weapons left for him to use on other courts.

The end.

*I know none of this will happen. But I think it’d be a nice way to go. And I realize this idea blows up the Mor-Emerie ship. I’m not against it! I’m just trash for a good enemies to lovers story.

#acosf #acosf spoiler #acotar series #nessian #feysand #Mor x an unnamed vallahan princess/spy #I’m not tagging other ships because y’all are losing it #Mor #lucien vanserra #azriel #gwyn berdara #Vassa #elain archeron #jurian #emerie #eris vanserra #nesta archeron #Cassian #amren #a court of silver flames #acotar theory #that will never happen

[mizzmaymayy]

ACOSF Post-Read Thoughts

One week later I have finally finished ACOSF and am ready to share my thoughts!

Before you start reading the book I advise this:

If you are an elucien shipper and/or love Lucien (like me) DO NOT expect to get much out of that... I’m sorry :( nothing is confirmed but there’s just not a lot. Also, stating my bias towards Lucien now since he is my baby.

Overall: I will say this book was so good to read. I found myself growing in self love and acceptance through this book. It completely surpassed my expectations for Nessian smut lol and I'm so very happy that nesta and Cassian are finally together.. mated for all eternity and for all to see.. LETS HAVE A WEDDING! and the friends Nesta has found.. I cry.. so happy for my mad girl. 

Small things I really enjoyed about this book:

How Cassian would have like “seasonal allergies” at the spring court lol its just so relatable

THE BALL SCENE OMGOMGOMGOGM MY FAVE SCENE FOR SURE. I love the politics in that scene and the aesthetics UGH... LOL and then when Cassian says MOVE. 

when nesta pictures both Azriel and Cassian on her.. 🥵

Things I really did not like about this book:

The lack of information from other character’s lives 😩 like we barely get any Mor, Lucien, Tamlin.. I just like need to know about them!!! but we get more characters 😩 and even though I do really like the new characters and am really interested in their future roles.. I just can’t not think about the OGs

The way the mating bond is presented/discussed bw Cassian and Nesta... like how come Lucien knew Elain was him mate the moment she is made but it takes Cassian to know until they kiss? Idk I just wish it would’ve been discussed earlier or unraveled better... We got it too good with Feysand

I do not like the idea of Rhysand being high king.. I just want the courts to be happy and work together.. an internal war would be so damaging I really don’t think it’d be worth it. It would do a lot of damage before going into an international war.. But I also know that he would be an amazing king but like just let him be happy with his people and court like he said 😫

Post-read thoughts:

I’m still a little upset we got this info about Lucien being Helion’s son and there was even a time when they were both in Velaris but no headway into that at all.

Idk im kinda really annoyed with Azriel atm.... that lust scene made me want to throw up.... and how come after 500 years he finally gets over Mor and then starts to like Elain.... and then now that he can have Elain immediately goes to Gwyn... ugh I just don’t like it. I wouldn’t like to be given a necklace that was meant for someone else... and what that necklace meant.. the scene that happened there... so like is she gonna wear it and azriel is then gonna think of Elain!? GWYN DESERVES BETTER.

I’m like 99% convinced Mor and Eris are mates or that if Eris even simply layed a finger on her all those many years ago she would’ve had to be Autumn Court property, and he knew no one deserved to be shackled to his father... I think Eris thinks his court deserves better than his father and is working towards that

So also, Nesta changed her and Feyre’s anatomy but not Elain’s.... and there had to be that talk where Gwyn said her anatomy was different and flexible.. (?so does that she can have an Illyrian baby?) 

Ugh I just think Az deserves better than someone else’s mate....

Like I know there’s talk about Elain getting the bond severed but even that would be painful... I just hate how we jump to the conclusion like oh Elain doesn’t like to be around him so we must sever the mating bond... like I think Elain also needs to do self care too.. like can’t they at least talk about stuff before this happens??? This could be so damaging to both of them. I think the reason Sarah has that scene in previous books where Feyre and Rhys talk about mating bonds and that they can be severed is to lay some rules down.. maybe it will relate more to Eris and Mor. Not that I want their bond to be severed either.. I think with growth they could both eventually be friends...

To add, I don't think Elain is meant for the Night Court.. In one of Cassian’s POV he like mentions how Elain doesn't really fit in with the Night Court when she is wearing the black dress... and when Nesta visits the Spring Court she talks about how Elain would love this place and it would be perfect for her... so idk. Maybe Lucien will get to take over Spring Court or the Day court and she will finally get a place she loves and belongs in. 

I know people are shipping Vassa and Lucien but can you tell me one thing they have in common or why they're meant to be that isn't the fact that they both have red hair/fire? Since we do we pair ppl off based off their physical appearance... 

Also, I think Vassa and Jurian are a thing... Lucien said they are always at each other’s throats and then he had like a pained look.. I think its a look of jealousy.. like that he wishes he had someone like that too. like they have each other- his friends, and he again feels alone.

I’ve been reading some theories about Elain being a villain and idk.. though I agree she is being hella shady.

Who will the next book be about? Thoughts for the next book/books

I’ve heard ppl say Sarah said she’ll write about Mor before someone else.. but I’m kinda thinking Elain is next..

I think that within the next books we are gonna get a lot of Autumn Court- which im super excited for- and get a lot more of Eris and Lucien and all the history with Jesminda, Lucien’s parentage, all the backward traditions  like the Blood Feud.. whatever the eff that is. But I know Lucien wouldn’t do any of that.. he’s so sweet to Elain.. I also know Lucien would watch Elain love someone else if meant she was happy..

I also feel like the Wild Hunt is gonna come back somehow...

Anywhoo, thats a wrap on my thoughts. tell me what you think!!!

#a court of silver flames #acosf #elucien

[thebluemartini]

Far From the Shallow - Chapter 7 [Nessian Fic]

TITLE: Far From the Shallow SYNOPSIS: Post-ACOFAS. As part of a deal with Feyre, Nesta has agreed to live with Cassian in the Illyrian Mountains. However, shortly after her arrival, she receives the startling news that she’s pregnant from one of her one-night stands. While she tries to quickly get a grip on her life, Cassian’s determined to make her see that she’s not facing this alone.

FIC LENGTH: Multi-chapter (Total Chapter Estimate: 14)

PREVIOUS CHAPTERS: Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5 / Chapter 6 TAGGING: @trash-for-nessian @dreaming-of-bohemian-nights @queenofillea1 @nestaarcheronwillkillme @my-fan-side @strangeenemy @maastrash @cageddovepoetry @bybooksanddreams @lilbat90 @ritamordio19 @mastercommandercaptain @feysand-dot-acotar @archeron-queen @welcometothespeaknowworldtour @empress-ofbloodshed @there-is-warmth-in-winter @mybbyfeyre @saltydreamcollector @justlikethecheshirecat @mis-lil-red @supebowlere @monstrousloves-explodinggalaxies @everything-that-i-love

*This chapter is also posted on AO3 and FF ________________________________________________________________

CHAPTER 7: February

As Cassian flew back from Velaris to his cabin, his body seemed to sing at the fact that he was getting closer and closer to Nesta. A couple of weeks ago, he felt something snap between them, and he knew it must have been the mating bond. And since then, it felt as if there was some kind of tether between them that was always wanting to pull them together. His body seemed to be in a state of unrest when he wasn’t near her.

But when they were together, he only found some contentment...because there was the fact that he always detected another male’s scent on her.

He knew that scent was coming from the baby she had created with another male, and it sent his blood pulsing with jealousy, leaving him feeling a little on edge when he was around her.

As far as he knew, Nesta knew nothing about this bond between them.

When he felt the bond snap into place, he nearly fell off of her bed in shock. But Nesta had no reaction as she continued to relish in the feeling of her baby kicking inside her stomach. And over the course of the few weeks since then, she made no mention of feeling anything different between them nor sensing the snap.

So Cassian said nothing to her...and still had said nothing about it to her.

Because how do you tell someone who feels that she’s lost control of every aspect of her life that something outside of themselves determined she should be bonded to him for life?

He certainly didn’t want her to feel forced to be with him.

 After being alive for over 500 years, the bond felt so strange and foreign. To be experiencing this after all this time…

He had thought that the potential for a powerful, strong and loving mating bond was a myth, considering he had seen so many poor matches over the centuries. But then Rhys and Feyre’s bond was superior to any relationship he had ever seen.

And he longed to experience such a love.

Knowing Nesta was his mate brought him both excitement and trepidation. He knew he was falling for her - had been falling for her for a long time. He already loved her as an ally, a confidant and a friend, but knew those feelings were on the brink of going deeper.

But he had no idea if she was close to feeling the same way. Hell, he didn’t even know if she even considered him a friend. And the mating bond wouldn’t matter if she didn’t feel anything for him. He would never allow her to accept the bond unless she reciprocated his feelings.

So he resolved to wait to tell her until he knew she cared for him.

(If that ever happened.)

Once he landed, he strode across the snow and through the door of his cabin, eager to find Nesta to discuss his morning visit with Rhys. After shaking the snow out of his hair upon entering the cabin, he headed in the direction of Nesta’s room when he didn’t see her in the living room.

But something felt off...he was not able to sense her presence.

She wasn’t in the cabin.

He tried to remind himself that were plenty of instances where he had come home to find Nesta was out somewhere. She was rather fond of walking and exploring.

But now the mating bond had made Cassian overprotective, he couldn’t help but feel extremely frustrated that he didn’t know where she was.

That frustration didn’t last long, however. As he stood in her room pondering where she could be, he heard the front door of the cabin open and close, and his heart seemed to pump with excitement at the nearness of his mate.

He stalked over to the living room and found her hanging up her coat and removing her boots.

“Where have you been?” he asked more roughly than he intended. The bond made him more edgy than normal.

“There’s no need to be such a possessive brute,” Nesta reprimanded him. “I was visiting the healer,” she revealed as she walked past him, heading toward her room.

Cassian followed after her. “You visited the healer? You should’ve told me. I could’ve gone with you.”

“I am perfectly capable of going to see the healer on my own,” Nesta said with a bit of sharpness to her voice. “Just as I have done the past few times.”

Cassian signed. “I know, but we’re getting closer to the baby’s birth. You shouldn’t be -”

“Being possessive and controlling does not look good on you, Cassian,” Nesta interrupted him as she turned around to face him and crossed her arms above her pregnant stomach.

“I don’t mean to sound that way. I -”

Nesta frowned as she interrupted him again. “Usually after such a comment, you would say something ridiculous like ‘Then tell me what does look good on me, sweetheart? Would nothing be more suitable?’ and you didn’t. What’s going on with you? What’s wrong?”

Cassian opened his mouth to speak but paused as he stared back at Nesta. She had evidently been trying to bait him back into acting like his usual self, like making comments that would typically make her roll her eyes. She had used it as a test to see if he was acting normally, and she admitted it. The old Nesta - the Nesta of a few months ago - would have never said nor admitted such a thing.

In the couple of weeks since he felt the snap of the bond - which occurred during a week where they had also expressed some of their deeper feelings to one another - their relationship had begun to feel more at ease. They certainly still bickered and tossed insults at one another, but now it was more out of fun rather than spite.

Cassian ran a hand through his long hair. “I’m sorry. Nothing’s wrong. I’m just more worried about the baby the closer we get to the birth.”

He truly was concerned and growing extra cautious about Nesta and the baby, but the bond perhaps amplified those worries.

“Please stop worrying. I am fine and the healer said that as far as she can tell, the baby is also fine,” Nesta said as she went over to the side of her bed and began pulling back the covers. “How was your meeting?”

“Good,” he answered, keeping it short upon the realization that Nesta was trying to get ready for an afternoon nap.

“Good?” she questioned as she turned her head back at him, giving him an unimpressed look. “That’s it?”

“I can tell you more after your nap.”

“Tell me now,” she calmly requested as she sat in her bed with her back leaning against the headboard.

“We don’t need to right now,” he replied. “You need to rest.”

“Cassian,” she said with exasperation as she patted the spot on the bed next to her, gesturing for him to lay beside her. “Tell me.”

“Are you inviting me to into your bed?” he asked charmingly with a devilish grin as he sat next to her.

“There’s the Cassian I know,” she remarked with a smirk.

“And find completely irresistible,” Cassian finished for her as his eyes glimmered with amusement.

Nesta huffed, but the smirk didn’t leave her face. “So the meeting…?” she began.

Cassian nodded. “Rhys wants me to visit with some of the other camps. He’s heard some camps have been having meetings with each other, so we need to make sure it’s not the beginning of some civil war.”

“Hmm,” Nesta said as she stared thoughtfully at the wall and slid her body down so her head was propped against her pillow.

“What are you thoughts on this?” Cassian inquired.

“Should you really be imposing yourself on the other camps?” she wondered. “They’d be forced to host you, plus you run the risk of them poisoning you again.”

“Do you have another suggestion?”

Nesta remained silent for a moment before answering. “Invite the camp leaders here. All of them.”

“Hmm.” Cassian rubbed his hand against his chin as he contemplated her suggestion. “Maybe for something like a dinner party?”

Nesta nodded. “You can talk to them all at once.”

“And possibly gauge their alliances.” Cassian remarked thoughtfully.

“And you could cook for them too,” Nesta added with a devious smile. “They’d love that.”

Cassian chuckled, knowing the idea of a male - let alone a bastard - cooking for them would drive them mad. “Indeed.”

“Plus, I’d actually be able to watch your back if you met with them here,” Nesta added with a smug grin.  “I think we’re getting close to the point where I probably shouldn’t be flying around too much.”

She started to rub her stomach as she closed her eyes. A genuine smile graced her face as she did so. As he stared at her, he thought about how he probably would be at a loss without her if he had to visit the other camps without her.

Plus, he would likely lose his mind with anxiety over wondering how Nesta was doing.

“I’ll consider it and discuss with Rhys,” he answered. Later, he would have to use his magical parchment to get a quick message to him. “But whatever we choose to do, will you help me write my letters to the camps?”

“Well, you certainly can’t be trusted to write a quality letter on your own,” she answered with her eyes still closed. “You’d be at a loss without me.”

“That’s true,” Cassian revealed softly and genuinely. Nesta’s eyes fluttered open to look up at him in surprise.

He loved this. These moments where they casually talked to each other, came up with ideas together, joked around with each other, and had honest moments together. These days, it felt so easy-going and natural. He wished he could lay beside her all day and talk like this.

...as well as stare into her mesmerizing eyes like this.

Cassian simply reached down and swept a stray strand of hair out of her face, letting his fingers linger on the side of her face as he stared back at her.

“We’ll talk more after your nap,” he announced quietly. A content smile came across Nesta’s face. “I’ll have dinner ready for you when you wake up.”

When she closed her eyes again, he removed his hand and got up off the bed.

 _______________________________________________________________

Three Weeks Later

When Nesta was stirred awake by a fluttery movement in her stomach, she couldn’t help but recall when she felt the baby kick for the first time last month.

It completely took her by surprise. The feeling of something within her - moving - was a strange sensation.

And yet, it was one that instantly brought her so much joy. Because the baby finally felt real to her. Her baby.

Without even thinking about it, she had instantly smiled and giggled with glee from the feeling. Despite the anxiety, the stress and the fear of becoming a parent, she was overcome with the realization that she hadn’t been alone these past several months. Her baby was with her as she was forced to go to the Illyrian Mountains and tried to find purpose in her life again.

This baby had made her want to live again.

Her elation from feeling the kick was so strong that she longed to share it. And when she had looked up, she found Cassian staring back at her and instantly took his hand to press it against her belly so he could feel the kicking too.

And he laughed boisterously with her, enlivening her even more.

It was the first time in a long time she had felt so tremendously happy. After feeling like an outsider and feeling so alone for so long, to have someone there to share her excitement made the moment all the more euphoric.

Especially after the emotionally intimate moment they had just shared, revealing their misconceptions, pains, and sufferings because of the war and because of the other.

Since that day, her relationship with Cassian had felt deeper and stronger than ever before. Being around him made her feel at ease. And over the past few weeks, they had organized a dinner gathering together for the Illyrian camp leaders, mailing out the letters to invite them about two weeks ago.

Her and Cassian operated as a team in the planning it. He always sought her opinion and considered her ideas, making her feel important and valued.

It was so unlike how her father and Tomas made her feel. When her father lost their family’s fortune, she felt discarded and unworthy of love. With Tomas, he made it clear that all she would be good for was pleasuring him whenever he wanted.

But Cassian made her feel like his equal, always asking for her help or opinion.

The dinner gathering was set to be tomorrow evening, and he asked her to be there.

(As if she wouldn’t demand to be there.)

But to be invited made her feel wanted.

It had been a long time since she felt that way.

As she laid in her bed, the baby gave another kick. Suddenly craving a midnight snack, she decided to get up off the bed and head to the kitchen, carrying her lamp for light as she went.

As she grabbed a piece of fruit from the kitchen and started eating it, she heard some kind of talking and groaning.

Feeling alarmed, she dropped her unfinished apple on the table and walked out of the kitchen. Following the sound, she ended up at the bottom of the staircase and realized the noise was coming from Cassian’s bedroom.

Slowly, she began making her way up the stairs. As she went, she suddenly started hearing cries and shouts of “No!” over and over again. They made her want to run up the remaining steps, but with her large belly, that was impossible.

She moved as quick as she was able and when she reached the top, she rushed to Cassian’s bedroom. When she pushed the door open, she found Cassian writhing on the bed, still shouting, with his cries growing louder and louder.

“Cassian!” Nesta exclaimed as she went to his bedside and put down her lamp on his night stand, but he didn’t seem to hear her.

“CASSIAN!” she shouted again as she crawled into his bed, reaching her hand out to grasp his upper arm and shake him.

But he was so large and muscular, she had to use two hands as she leaned over him and shook him. “CASSIAN, WAKE UP!”

His cries died on his lips as he opened his eyes to find her looking over him. He took a few deep, heavy breaths before answering. “Nesta?”

Nesta nodded and put her hand against his cheek. “Whatever you saw, it was just a nightmare.”

He hadn’t lied to her when he told her months ago, after hearing her scream his name during a nightmare, that he had nightmares about the war too.

Cassian brought up his hand to cover hers on his cheek and squeezed. Probably checking to make sure she was real.

She understood the need to make sure the world around you was real. That you were no longer in the midst of the war, the pain, the suffering, or the warped memories.

She watched him as he gradually remembered where he was.

“You came up the stairs?” he asked groggily. “You’re over six months pregnant! You could’ve fallen!” he stated, clearly aghast. 

“Stop acting like I can’t walk around while I’m pregnant,” she reprimanded him. “Besides, someone’s shouts was disturbing my sleep. I had to put an end to it,” she added in a lighter tone.

A soft smile appeared on Cassian’s face, and he squeezed Nesta’s hand again. “I’m sorry,” he whispered as he released her hand.

“You don’t need to be,” she answered softly as she laid down beside him and removed her hand from his cheek. “What were you dreaming about?”

He sighed. “The day when so many of my men died from that blast of light from the Cauldron,” he stated solemnly. “Except this time, I was forced to watch as the blast killed each of them, one by one. It was...horrifying.”

She couldn’t comfort him by telling him the dream wasn’t real. The events were indeed real. And with the meeting with some of the Illyrian camp leaders happening tomorrow, it was not a complete surprise he was having a nightmare about the death of his men.

In her own nightmares and sufferings resulting from the war, she was not alone. Just as he had said...but to actually witness it...the realization sunk deeper within her.

And she didn’t want him to feel alone either. Comforting him in the only way she could think to, she laid her head upon his shoulder and hesitantly rested her hand across his chest. At the motion, Cassian lifted up his hand to wrap it around her shoulders, bringing her closer.

 “I’m sorry,” she breathed, still feeling awful for being the one who called him away from the Cauldron’s blast, leaving him to deal with this guilt.

“As I’ve told you before, you don’t need to be,” he murmured before gently placing a kiss on her forehead. “Thanks for being here.”

There was a stirring within her stomach. “I think the baby wants you to know it’s here too,” she said with a slight smile before picking up Cassian’s free hand and leading it to her stomach.

While he pressed his hand against her belly, he beamed. “Thank you, baby Archeron.”

“Are you all right?” Nesta asked him, being familiar with the difficulties of recovering from a terrible reminder of the events of the war.

Cassian rubbed her stomach. “I will be,” he said after his chest heaved with a sigh. “Distract me. Tell me, do you think the baby will be a boy or a girl?”

Nesta took a moment to think. “A girl.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. I just...have this feeling.”

“I think it’s a boy,” Cassian piped in.

“Why?”

“Just a feeling,” he said with a smirk.

Nesta rolled her eyes. “Well, I guess we’ll find out who’s right in a couple of months.”

“We should probably go shopping soon to buy clothes and toys for the baby,” he offered.

“As long as it’s a shop nowhere near Feyre’s art studio,” Nesta sternly said.

“Understood.” Cassian nodded. “Any ideas for a name yet?”

“In a book I was reading the other day, a character was named Cordelia. I rather liked that name. For a boy...maybe Theo?”

“Hmm.”

“Do you have any better ideas?” she asked him sarcastically.

“Well I still stand by Cassian for a boy, and then Cassandra if it’s a girl.”

Nesta rolled her eyes. “I am not naming this baby after you. I already have too many cocky Cassians in my life.”

“You mean you have just the right amount of Cassians in your life,” Cassian corrected her.

After a pause, she spoke. “I have just the right amount,” she was willing to admit as she looked up at him.

And he was staring right back at her, giving her the infamous look. That look that the shopkeeper in Velaris pointed out. That one that he sported during their sleigh ride at the Solstice fair. The look that sent her heart racing with desire yet terrified her all at the same time.

And that urge to close the distance bubbled up again.

But she gave into her fear. “Goodnight, Cassian,” she said as she abruptly sat up with the intention of heading back to her room.

“Nesta,” Cassian suddenly pleaded as she shifted her legs to hang off the side of the bed. “Please stay...and keep the nightmares away.”

His words made her stop.

Most people considered her to be a living nightmare.

Was he implying that her presence would stop the nightmares from coming for the rest of the night?

That was something she could not deny him.

Ever so slowly she turned around and returned to her former spot on the bed, nuzzled at Cassian’s side. He wrapped his arm tightly around her again. “Thank you, Nes.”

And they fell asleep peacefully beside each other, remaining embraced until dawn.

________________________________________________________________

“Nes, are you ready?” Cassian exclaimed loudly as he went between the kitchen and the living room to place dishes of food on the table set for eleven. He had temporarily cleared out the living room couch to make space for his dinner gathering with the Illyrian camp leaders.

“Almost,” Nesta called back.

Cassian looked up at the clock that hung in his living room above the fireplace. It was almost time for the camp leaders to arrive.

“I’ll be outside to greet them,” he hollered back.

Illyrian protocol required him to be outside his residence before fellow Illyrians arrived, or else it would be a sign of disrespect and offense. Stepping outside the door, he walked across the wooden platform and stepped down onto the snowy ground to stand and wait.

His body was tense with anxiousness over the meeting. Over the past few weeks, he and Nesta had gone over ideas and topics to discuss to improve life for Illyrians females and children. While he passionately believed in the reforms, he was nervous over how the Illyrian leaders would react…

Well, he certainly knew they would not react well to them, but he just wasn’t sure how badly they would react to them and what he would have to do to convince them to make the changes…

He heard the crunch of boots against the ground, causing him to abruptly lift his head. Devlon was approaching.

When he reached him, Cassian held out his hand to shake in greeting. “Good evening, Devlon,” Cassian forced himself to say kindly.

Devlon simply nodded in greeting as he returned the handshake. “I suppose a congratulations are in order,” he remarked sarcastically as he eyed Cassian suspiciously. “I saw your witch walking around the camp recently. It appears you’re going to be a father soon.”

“Indeed,” Cassian said seriously without even thinking about it.

But as soon as the word slipped out, he realized his mistake. And yet...ever since his poor choice of words with Mor, he had started wondering about his relationship to Nesta’s child. Wasn’t he taking on the role of a father for this child? He’d been determined to help Nesta through this pregnancy and intended to help her raise the child if she needed it. He didn’t want her to feel like she was alone in this...and if there was no other male figure in the child or Nesta’s life, wouldn’t it be only natural that he’d be seen as the father figure?

The thought of another male stepping in to be a father to Nesta’s child sent his heart pounding with jealousy, on top of territoriality the bond brought him.

But...he knew he should really ask Nesta to see how she views his relationship with her child.

“But Nesta is the one you should be congratulating,” Cassian added to Devlon, despite knowing that he wouldn’t listen to his suggestion of offering good wishes to a female. “You may head to the table inside.”

Devlon gave him a curt nod before stepping up on the platform and going inside the cabin. Cassian’s eyes followed him, but his body froze when he saw him walking past Nesta, who evidently had been leaning against the doorway.

Nesta and Devlon shared a cold look with each other, even as she curtsied (with slight difficulty due to her stomach) out of respect to his status. After he passed her by, Nesta turned her gaze to Cassian.

Cassian couldn’t breathe.

Nesta was wearing the elegant black dress he requested she try on and buy when they were in Velaris...and she looked more stunning in the dress than he remembered. Perhaps it was because she had her hair up and twisted in a special braid atop her head this time or the way she had done her makeup or the way the silky dress accentuated her larger breasts.

Nesta brought her hand up to her stomach and smiled.

Or perhaps the stunning beauty was because Nesta was glowing.

Ever since the baby first kicked, she’d been glowing with joy, and now she was looking back at him with happiness shining in her eyes.

“You look…” Cassian paused. “You look...so beautiful,” he managed to get out in his state of awe.

“Thank you,” Nesta replied with a slight blush as she returned to leaning against the doorway. It suddenly dawned on him what he had just said to Devlon, which meant...she probably heard him say it.

“Did you overhear…?” Cassian trailed off as he grimaced.

Nesta nodded.

“I hope...you aren’t upset that I said that,” he stated tentatively.

“I’m not,” she replied coolly.

Cassian let out a deep breath he didn’t realize he was holding.

But the fact that she wasn’t upset...he couldn’t help but wonder if this meant something.

The sight of her in that dress fueled his desire to kiss her. But did she share that desire? Last night, she had cuddled next to him and slept beside him. And now she was blushing as he gave her compliments, telling him it was fine that he allowed Devlon to think he was the father of her child, and she was staring back at him with a look that wasn’t a glare. Was he too blinded by his own care for her that he thought she seemed to be looking at him with admiration?

He stepped up the platform and walked toward her. Her eyes widened a bit as he approached, and she straightened her body. “I came to ask you if you needed help with anything else?” she asked.

Cassian grabbed hold of both of her hands in his. “Your presence is enough,” he whispered.

For a moment they stared into each other’s eyes, but suddenly Nesta pulled away from him and removed her hands from his grasp. “Someone’s coming,” she explained.

Flustered from the loss of touching her, Cassian clumsily turned around to find Orion from camp Dunclare strolling toward them. Upon realizing it was him, both Cassian and Nesta straightened themselves. Nesta crossed her arms across her chest.

Cassian grinned with amusement when he noticed Orion eye Nesta warily while cautiously approaching them.

“I see you managed to get yourself up off the ground,” Nesta coldly stated when Orion stood before them. “But I suppose dogs like you have a knack for getting up when there’s hope of getting scraps from the table.”

Orion narrowed his eyes at her, while Cassian beamed with pride at her.

“And what might those scraps be?” Orion asked her, trying to play the fool.

“The power you hope to reclaim by being with your fellow camp leaders,” Nesta answered sternly. “But I trust you remember my words to you the last time we met and will think before you dare to bite.” Nesta made a show of tapping her fingers while her arms remained crossed above her pregnant belly.

They may have not yet discovered how Nesta could activate her powers, but that didn’t stop her from reminding him of what she was potentially capable of doing again.

“You certainly know how to leave a lasting impression, Nesta Archeron,” he whispered roughly. “You’re very fortunate to have such a wicked creature as your bodyguard, Cassian,” he added without even looking as Cassian. His eyes never left Nesta’s arms.

“I am very lucky to have her at my side,” Cassian remarked sincerely as his eyes flitted to meet Nesta’s gaze.

Nesta’s current facial expression was one he could not yet figure out and one he did not yet have a name for. It was new to him.

“And in your bed, evidently,” Orion added in a disgruntled tone with a glance to Nesta’s stomach.

Cassian narrowed his eyes at him, frustrated with the implication that Nesta was his whore. Before he could even think of a response, Nesta threw him a look that told him to keep silent.

“Allow me to lead you inside,” Nesta told Orion, gesturing for him to follow her as she walked inside the cabin.

From a distance, Orion followed her inside, while Cassian turned around, prepared to greet another war-lord.

 _______________________________________________________________

The room was quiet.

It appeared everyone had chosen to seethe in silence as Cassian, Nesta, and the camp leaders sat around the table.

Upon learning that Cassian prepared and cooked their meal and set the table, the leaders wanted nothing to do with the meal. The imbeciles were still so caught up in their male-dominated ways and certainly didn’t take Cassian’s first topic of discussion lightly.

“I’d like to establish a monthly council meeting between all of the camp leaders to discuss grievances, reforms, and solutions,” Cassian announced. “And my first request is that you each select a female from your camp to also serve on the council.”

They immediately all cried out in protest and outrage:

“This is ridiculous!”

“What would they know about this?”

“They shouldn’t have a say. They don’t need a say!”

“And what female will you pick? Your whore right there?”

Up until that moment, Cassian managed to remain calm. But that comment set him off, sending him to his feet in rage. He slammed his palms on the ends of the table.

“Her name is Nesta,” Cassian said in a deathly quiet tone. “She is not a whore, and I certainly do not own her. If you ever refer to as a whore again, I will blast you into pieces with my siphons. Is that understood?”

He received a stiff and stern nod from each of them. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Nesta to his right with a stoic look on her face as she stared at them all.

Cassian sat back down in his chair at the end of the table. As soon as he did so, he felt Nesta grab hold of his hand under the table and give it a squeeze.

 “As for the female council member, I’ve decided to let you all pick one for me,” Cassian explained more calmly. 

Cassian originally wanted Nesta to be on the council with him, but she declined, citing the fact that she wasn’t Illyrian and how that would be even more offensive to them. Instead, she recommended that he ask the other leaders pick one for him to let them have more power as an act of goodwill.

He still wished it could be Nesta though, but she insisted she would continue to help him without being on the council.

“Before you go making changes, Cassian…” Andor of the Emberhale camp spoke up, still not giving Cassian respect in referring to him by his title. “There is still a score to settle.”

Cassian and Nesta turned to look at him. “And what score is that?” Cassian inquired.

“Many of our camps...” Andor began as he gestured to rest of the leaders. “...are still bitter and resentful of the fact that you lost so many of our men in the last war. They demand atonement.”

The other leaders mumbled with agreement.

“And how would they like me to atone for this?” Cassian asked carefully, not sure where this was going.

“All of us leaders here are challenging you to a special Blood Rite. The same Blood Rite rules apply, except for this one, you will be the only trying to reach the top of Ramiel by the end of the seven days. The others in the Rite will be relatives of the Illyrians who died, and their intention will be to kill you.”

Cassian’s heart started pounding fast. “So, if I make it to the top of Ramiel by the end of week, then what?”

“You will have atoned for the deaths of our people, and the camps will accept you as the General Commander and will be more inclined to obey you.”

“More inclined?” Cassian asked incredulously. Their offer didn’t even guarantee anything.

“If you don’t follow through with this Rite, a war will certainly break out, demanding you be replaced as our General Commander since you have not looked out for the interests of the camps.”

Anger raged through his body. “But we are part of the Night Court. We -”

His voice was drowned out by the words of affirmation among the other leaders about what Andor had said.

Nesta released Cassian’s hand.

“So, what you’re saying is I have no choice but to undergo this special Blood Rite?”

“You also have the option of stepping away from your position,” Vitus from camp Erwood piped in. “And avoid all of this.”

Cassian took a deep breath and resisted the urge to snarl from frustration. He turned his face toward Nesta, looking to her for answers as to what he should do. “Nesta…”

She returned his gaze. “You should go through with the Rite,” she stated, then quickly shifted her eyes to look down at the table.

The quickness and lack of emotion in her response startled him and burned him. His chances of surviving the Rite were not high. He may have survived it once, but he had the help of his friends and didn’t have pissed-off Illyrians deliberately out to kill him then.

Several months ago, he remembered musing to himself that he wished to do the Blood Rite again to break the tension among the camps. If he were asked to do this back then, he would have boldly accepted the challenge without any hesitation. That was when he had no one to look out for and care for.

But now…

He stared at Nesta, dazzling in her silky, black dress, and his eyes drifted from her face down to her stomach.

And yet, Nesta’s reply made it seem like she didn’t care if he was around to look after them and take care of them.

Well, if she didn’t need him…

“I will go through with the Rite,” he sternly announced.

Andor smiled at him. “The Rite will commence in a week’s time.” ________________________________________________________________

A/N: And "in a week's time," it'll be March! :) Prepare yourself for March - it'll be a doozy! (It's currently set to get 3 chapters.) Thank you (as always) for all of the support! I love reading all of your comments! <3 ---> CHAPTER 8

#nesta #cassian #nesta cassian #nessian #nesta archeron #a court of thorns and roses #acotar #a court of mist and fury #acomaf #a court of wings and ruin #acowar #a court of frost and starlight #acofas #fanfiction #far from the shallow

[ma-lemons]

my thoughts on some acotar characters

Hello. I’d like to discuss Elain, Lucien, and Nesta. First thing to know about me. My OTP (besides Feysand since I think is a given) is Elucien. I haven’t read ACOFAS yet.

Elain

I like Elain. People think because you’re nice, or you’re sweet, you’re automatically weak. But Elain killed Hybern and I’m so happy about that. I can never relate to heroines because they are so badass and tough, and the nice characters usually dies or is portrayed as very naive. Either way, I think Elain needs character development, but I don’t think she needs to become “tougher” or more like Nesta. Elain is struggling mentally, so while I do ship Elucien, right now, what she needs is someone to get her out of her little funk. A friend. Someone to open up to, so she can slowly find her purpose. Maybe that’ll be Lucien. Maybe that’ll be Feyre or Azriel. Maybe someone completely different. Another thing I think people ignore is that Elain was part of Feyre’s abuse too. While Feyre was out hunting, Elain didn’t lift a finger, just like Nesta. She has just as much blame in this situation like Nesta does. Maybe she wasn’t as cold to Feyre, but both sisters let their baby sister provide for them instead of doing anything to help. And it makes me so mad that Feyre hasn’t confronted them about it. I think Elain has a lot of room for improvement before falling in love, and I hope SJM will provide it for her. That being said, her falling in love may help her character development, but I’d like to see some non-romantic development.

Lucien

I love Lucien. He is my favorite character in this series, and I can’t really put my finger on it as to why. I just love him. That being said, Lucien needs a purpose, just like Elain. The poor guy lost his best friend (Tamlin still kinda sucks, sorry), his love, his whole family (not that we care, besides his mom). He really has no one, and the Inner Circle either treats him like crap or ignores him fully. Sometimes I wonder why SJM even put him in the series. He wasn’t in ACOWAR for five minutes and when he was sent to find Vassa, he didn’t even find her, Feyre’s DAD did (also wth that was so random, but I enjoyed it). As an Elucien shipper, I feel like these two could help each other love again, but SJM doesn’t really give Lucien a lot of room to grow. His personality went from sassy and witty to... kind of despondent, bummed... and with him trying to figure Elain out, it’s like he’s a lost puppy. I just want to know what Lucien’s plan is!! And someone please let him have a happy family ending, for goodness sakes. Someone give him a hug, please. For me. (Also I know lucien has many flaws that need to be fixed, especially his undying loyalty to tamlin when feyre was in trouble, I feel like his judgement gets clouded often.)

Nesta

Oh boy. *breathes* okay. Here we go.

Nesta. Oh, Nesta. I really wish I could say I like you, but really I don’t. I really don’t. And before you say “Oh, you hate Nesta because she’s cold, and powerful, and doesn’t take crap from people” NO. No, I love that about Nesta. She is refreshing and amazing and so strong. But I hate how she treats Cassian and ESPECIALLY FEYRE. I can’t ship Nessian until Nesta stops treating Cassian like garbage. I haven’t read ACOFAS yet, but I heard that Nesta slept around with guys, and I for one didn’t really care, but then I remembered she kissed Cassian? Did... what happened to that? Its not the fact that she was sleeping around it’s the fact that I saw no purpose in that kiss if she is this closed off. I just wanna know why. Was this a tease for what is to come? In ACOWAR, you could feel her worry and concern for him, and then, she ignores him again. I just can’t ship something that seems so toxic. Not yet. The idea of Nessian is cute, but in reality, neither Nesta nor Cassian are ready to be together, in my opinion. Nesta is in a lot of denial and is very, very stubborn. I’m not quite sure what she wants, because it’s all surface level. She wasn’t Elain to be safe, but what else? What are her desires? Her wishes? I don’t know anything about Nesta besides the fact that she is cold!!! Now. Onto Feyre. God. Nesta makes me so mad. Your dad didn’t provide for the family. Okay, yes that stinks. Your little sister hunts for y’all. The LEAST you can do is treat her like a human being. Why did she only protect Elain? Is Feyre not the youngest? Why did she never even hug her, tell her it was okay, HELP her? I really can’t like a character like this, she just upsets me a lot, for multiple reasons. I can’t wait for the day she apologizes and Feyre yells at her, gets all her anger out. Nesta needs to be slapped. (okay maybe I’m a bit overboard). I think Nesta needs to learn to prioritize and see things from other people’s point of view. She has her good moments, but sometimes I think everyone glorifies her too much for the little good things she does. That being said, she has a lot of good qualities that I think really show how she could be a good leader.

Let me write this bigger for people who don’t understand. Nesta doesn’t owe Cassian anything. That’s why I don’t particularly ship them becuase theres so many mixed signals going on here. If Nessian wasn’t a really big ship, I don’t think I’d mind Nesta’s animosity towards Cassian. Clearly if it’s to be canon, it’ll needto be developed, but i can’t actively ship it because of the way she treats him. Nesta doesn’t NEED Cassian. I’m only stating this because most of the fandom seems to like this ship. Nesta doesn’t need to be nice to Cassian at all, but for she could sure stop acting like she’s ready to kill everyone around her with her bare hands. Don’t mistake my dislike for her as me hating her because Nessian isn’t canon yet. That isn’t it. Feyre and Cassian have both done so many things for Nesta and she literally acts like she is incapable of at least thanking them.

Overall, there’s a lot of things I don’t like about this series and a lot of things I like. There will be more books, so I’m only hoping Sarah can create good romances as well as develop all her characters. I have many different thoughts on ships, which I could write about later on if I have time. I’m practically begging for Elain development because I just want to see her flourish!

#a court of frost and starlight #acotar #a court of thorns and roses #elain archeron #lucien vanserra #nesta archeron #books #sarah j maas #acotar series