Tumgik
#but I'm probably the only one who finds this funny so
drvscarlett · 20 hours
Text
Let Him Cook Pt4
Series Part 1, 2, 3, 4
Taglist: @bookstore-of-dreams @barcelonaloverf1life @ririyulife @minseok-smaus @mehrmonga @sltwins @charlesgirl16 @six-call @spideybv28 @casperlikej @weekendlusting @janeholt3 @evie-119 @leilanixx @randomgirlnumber-13 @itsjustkhaos
Tumblr media
Y/NCooks just posted a photo.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Y/NCooks Finally some vitamin seaaaaaaaaaaaaa
User1 Oh she is living the life!
Friend1 Say hi to the boyfriend for me
YNCooks he says hi Friend1 enjoy lovebirds!!!
User2 She is so hot and her boyfriend is equally hot. Power couple!
User3 Something about that back and that filter seems kinda familiar.
User4 OMG right? Its like I know it from somewhere but I can't pinpoint it. User5 I thought I was the only one but it seems like its really familiar.
User6 Its giving a pinterest vibes! She is everything I aspire to be.
User7 Are you still the one in-charge of cooking Y/N?
Y/NCooks Yuppp. But don't worry because he lifts the grocery and pays for the food, its an equal relationship User8 The boyfriend seems like a catch
User9 God when will it be me?
Charles_Leclerc just posted a photo.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Charles_Leclerc good food and good company
User1 Who is that??? Who is that hand?????
User2 Charles is finally breaking his single streak, a sad day for all the Charles girlies
PierreGasly Oh so that's why your boat was missing Charles_Leclerc I'm not discussing it here PierreGasly We just want to know, who is the lucky lady User3 Ohmygod Pierre just found out just like we all did
User4 That blue filter is back
User5 Just when we thought he forgot about it
User6 why is everyone and their partners softlaunching in a yacht
User7 who else is in a yacht? User6 There's this homecook and masterchef winner named Y/N that is softlaunching their partner on a yacht User7 Oh bestie that back looks familiar, don't you think User9 User9 SUSPICIOUS!!! User9 Nah, I highly doubt Charles can bag a chef. I mean the man couldn't cook pasta and its just pasta User7 you are probably right, im just delulu
"This is getting mildly annoying"Charles pouted "Usually they are quick to connect the pieces"
"All in due time honey"
It was actually a funny thing for you since fans find it highly impossible that Charles could bag a chef as his partner. You wouldn't tell Charles but you admit that his cooking skills is not a major selling point to a lot of chefs out there.
Ever since MasterChef ended, you two have been open about going public. The relationship has been kept in wraps for over 3 years so Charles is feeling pretty confident that it has already been a tested by time. But more than that, Charles opened up how he wanted to go public so that he'll be able to showcase his support.
"I can't wait for them to figure it out just so I can tell the world that I am the luckiest guy in the world for having you as my partner" he clings to you as a loopy smile appears on his face.
"And I can't wait to showcase the world how you have been drastically improving with your cooking skills" you smile "You can be my sous chef when you are off season"
"I'm not really sure if you are being sarcastic but I'll take this as a win and I'm considering myself masterchef approved"
The Gordon incident
There were 5 missed calls from Charles which made you slightly worried. You were unable to answer the call since you were driving home. You immediately rushed to the apartment and you saw a weird scenario. Charles was spread out on the floor, face down and seems to be in pain.
"What happened to you?"you asked as you set down your bag at the counter.
"Leave me be, I am a disgrace. I have fallen from heaven." Charles moped.
"Seriously honey, what's going on. You are scaring me"
Charles only lifted his phone for you to look at. You looked at it and it was a screenshot from Twitter with a quote tweet from Gordon about the pasta incident.
"Charles, you can't bag a chef if your cooking is as disastrous as that. Call me when you have the time-Oh my god. Gordon did not just say that" you burst out laughing.
"Laugh in my misery, go ahead and laugh."
You have to contain your giggles but then you cannot seem to help yourself. Charles continued to mope at the floor how no one will believe that you are his girlfriend now.
"It was just one time that I wasn't able to cook pasta properly, one time"
"Yes honey but the internet is forever"
After a while, Charles got up and you were slightly confused when he started bringing out the pots and pans out of the cupboard. He took out some of the pasta and then he grabbed his apron.
"You are going to teach me and we won't stop till I get a good pasta redemption" Charles said with full determination.
There was a bright idea that suddenly popped in your head, "I think I can do something better than that"
You started to type in your phone and after a while your phone started ringing. A familiar face on the screen and Charles almost fainted after hearing the accent.
"YOU GOT GORDON ON SPEED DIAL TO TEACH ME?"
Dinner with the drivers
The Australian Grand Prix was the first time that you actually met Charles' friends and former teammates. Charles arranged for an exclusive dinner with the grid drivers of 2025 in your restaurant.
"How did you get a reservation here Charles? I have been trying to get one for my parents, they love the Chef here and supported her during the masterchef days"Oscar asked.
"I know someone" Charles was trying his best to suppress his grin and elaborate further.
"Make sure to tell me later, I would love to bring my parents here. Cheers mate"
Dinner went on progressively well. There were variation of cuisines available and it catered to their specific Even Lewis loved that the vegan option was vast and Nando even agrees that if this is how much food options vegan has then he can go Vegan.
It was now tiMe for dessert and some drivers opted for a coffee while some thinks they deserve for a cheat day.
"Is this Ferrari's new strategy to shaving weight?"Max joked "Make the other drivers eat more so the car will be unbalanced"
"Fred is getting more creative with his strategy eh. Last year with my appendix and this year with Charles' food"Carlos agreed
The whole table erupted with the antics but Pierre is dying with curiosity already. Charles kept on mentioning how tonight is a really important night for him to announce something. He can't forget this dinner since its all that Charles has been talking about ever since they arrived in Australia.
"But in all honesty, you said you have something to tell us Charles" Pierre wondered "I'm dying to know"
Charles excused himself for a second and all the drivers on the table watched as he went to the kitchen. You were still in your chef's jacket when Charles spotted you.
"Is it time already? Do I look okay?"
"You look more than gorgeous mon amour"Charles replied, giving you a soft kiss to the cheeks.
The two of you walked out of the kitchen with hands interlaced with one another. The table suddenly fell quiet as they saw the two of you approaching the table. Charles has the most smug grin on his face.
"Everyone, I would like you to introduce the talented and amazing Chef for tonight Y/N" Charles lifted your intertwined hands "And she's also my girlfriend"
The drivers were all silent and shocked as they pieced out everything together. Then the flurry of questions started.
"Did you try Charles' pasta?" "Were you poisoned to say yes to him?" "How on earth did Charles get a MasterChef winner" "Can you teach me how you made the appetizer with the pea and corn"
It was so funny and you two were in a long night for explaining. But as you sat down bext to Charles, you felt at ease. You know that you can handle anything together.
The accidental reveal
Charles_Leclerc just posted a photo.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Charles_Leclerc We’ll do everything together to get as many of those trophies in the years to come
User1 Charles is a future WDC
User2 those trophies needs a little bit of polishing, don't you think?
User3 The dust that they have been collecting
User4 Leave the man alone, he's away from home 24/7
User5 is it just me or did you guys see the MasterChef trophy at the back
User6 isn't that the australian trophy, maybe its the p2 from last year User7 nooo! User5 is right, it has the logo
User8 SIR THAT TROPHY IN THE BACK ISN'T YOURS
landonorris lol since when did you have time to do a sidequest with masterchef while we race User10 LANDO! maxverstappen1 surprised he can hold himself till the end. CarlosSainz55 surprised he can cook Charles_Leclerc uninvited for dinner landonorris NOW WAIT A SECOND
Charles_Leclerc and Y/NCooks posted a photo.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Charles_Leclerc spot the game difference is getting difficult.
User1 Man really said fuck it!
User2 I can't believe this crossover
User3 If someone told me this happened a year ago, I would have laughed at you User4 There is no way Charles_Leclerc Why not, I have lots of redeeming qualities
User5 So you mean to say Charles Leclerc is the boyfriend she has been talking about in MasterChef. How did we not piece this out together?
User6 The adopted by the italian family. The cake after Charles P3 in Jeddah. The long distance relationship. THE LECLERC BROTHERS AS HER CLOSEST FRIENDS. HOW DID WE NOT SEE IT User7 I think its because we think Charles can't bag Y/N Charles_Leclerc you all underestimated me
User8 My new favorite trope, the woman who loves to cook for Gordon and the man who loves to get grilled by Gordon
User9 IM LAUGHING! Remember that tweet Charles_Leclerc I'll have you know that I have improved!
User12 Where can I get Y/N, she is so beautiful and talented
Charles_Leclerc sorry out of stock!!!!
User10 Im laughing at how Charles is fighting everyone in the comment section. He really said, he has time
Y/NCooks posted a photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Y/NCooks the first two was taken two weeks into dating. We preferred staying indoors and the comforts of the house so we could have our privacy. Charles burned the fries and that's a photo of him insisting it was crispy not burnt // fast forward to two weeks ago when he insisted on cooking pasta and making pizza, it was pretty good. The pasta was actually al dente and the pizza was made from scratch.
Thank you honey for growing with me for the past 3 years. I love you all the way from Melbourne to Monaco (or whichever country you are in rn)
User1 This is so wholesome, I ship them together
User2 CHARLES CREMATED THE FRIES
User3 3 YEARS???? THAT MADE ME EVEN MORE SURPRISED
Gordongram FINALLY. The boyfriend is revealed. Hope I can taste some of your cooking Charles_Leclerc
Charles_Leclerc please have mercy on me Y/NCooks He cooks as much as he can so he can cook for you as a thanks for your tutorial lessons User5 GORDON TAUGHT CHARLES???? WHATTTT
User6 God I have seen what you have done for others
User7 I'm looking back at every post of Y/N about the boyfriend. I think I'm sleeping at the highway
User8 same, they are so lovely with each other
User9 Couple goals!
Charles_Leclerc I love you so much. But I thought you deleted that first date photo
Y/NCooks the internet is forever honeyyyyy User10 I love them so much
landonorris so now the cat is out of the bag, can you teach me how to cook now?
yukitsunoda0511 me tooooo! maxverstappen1 i wanna learn too Charles_Leclerc you're cooking maxverstappen1 ??? maxverstappen1 if you can cook, anyone can cook Charles_Leclerc you are always cooking during the races, let me have this maxverstappen1 no :)) landonorris I JUST WANT COOKING LESSONS!
315 notes · View notes
cheriladycl01 · 3 days
Text
The Bottle - Carlos Sainz x Reader
Plot: You'd always believed in soulmates, in your culture an old tradition was that a person would send out a letter in a glass bottle for their soulmate with clue's requesting the person who found it comes to find them.
Tumblr media
Carlos walked along the long stretch of sand with his cousin. It was summer and they were vacationing in Mallorca in the family property.
They'd gone for a morning jog keeping up with his fitness plan for over the summer break ready for the second stint of his F1 season.
"What's that?" Carlos mumbles looking down at the glass bottle buried half in and half out of the season. He reaches down to pick it up but his cousin smacks his hand away.
"It could be broken and hurt you!" he exclaims looking at Carlos in shock as to why he would be so silly.
"It's not broken look, there's a note inside I'm intrigued!" he says pulling it out the sand and popping the cork off the top that was keeping the paper dry.
He pulls the paper out looking and reading the note on it.
Dear Soulmate, If you picked this up, it's because something called you too. In my culture when we do this and someone picks it up it means their our soulmate. I now have to give you clues and if you're intrigued enough you'll come find me. My name is Y/N and I'm 21 years old. Clue 1: I'm from country known for it's monarchy! Clue 2: I have a degree in fashion design from a top university Clue 3: 2021 Clue 4. I work under Mr McQueen Clue 5. 36 Clue 6. Enbankment Yours Sincerely, Your Soulmate.
"No way!" Carlos laughs re-reading it! He stuffs it in his pocket, knowing to take it home and look more into it.
"What was it!" his cousin asks looking over.
"Nothing!" he exclaims not wanting his cousin to think he was crazy, but Carlos had a strong belief in fate. This meant that of course he would come and find you.
You had actually sent that bottle out years ago on your 21st birthday in Australia, you were now 24 and thriving in your career as a fashion designer in Alexander McQueen.
You'd forgotten about the bottle since you'd done it, for a few months after you hoped someone would have found it but it slowly become one of those things you just forgot about.
For Carlos, he returned home with the note in his jacket pocket and he set it down on his desk.
He couldn't help but giggle re-reading over the clues and note. As a famous F1 driver he found the working under McQueen funny, but that didn't lead him too much.
But his best chance would be to join Lando for the week before the British Grand Prix, as he knew that you'd be in the UK. According to clue 1.
"Lando, please take this seriously this is a real person I want to find her!" he exclaims shoving the photocopied version of the original letter as he didn't want to destroy it.
"Okay, right so you've determined she's a uni student from the UK. There's like over 150 universities here so it's going to be impossible especially if we don't know what year she graduated" Lando sighs looking down the clues.
"Well, what about Clue 3, 2021, you recon that's when she graduated?" he asks and Lando puts a finger on his chin, thinking for a moment.
"It could be, but that would mean she also would have sent it out in 2021, how did this survive for four years at sea!" Lando exclaims looking over at Carlos who has his head tilted in shock.
"What do you mean?" he asks.
"Well, the youngest you can graduate is 21 in the UK, so if she did it in 2021, at age 21 she would now be 24?" Lando admits.
"And it says top UK, university that's either Oxford or Cambridge. And only Cambridge have a specific one called Fashion Design" Lando explains after some research making some deductions.
"Take me there!" Carlos says suddenly.
"To Cambridge... no mate! Look there's other clues. She's got a fashion degree, is in the UK and works under Mr McQueen, she probably is a designer in London HQ of Alexander McQueen which would explain Embankment!" Lando deducts and Carlos just has a shocked look on his face the whole time.
"What is Enbankment?" he asks.
"It's an underground station, I bet that's the station she uses to get home, to Apartment 36 perhaps?" Lando asks.
"Fuck onlyfans, if F1 fails become a god damn detective!" Carlos says pulling him into big hug before letting go and pulling shoes and a coat.
"Where are you going?" Lando shouts after him.
"The McQueen HQ building!" Carlos shouts back.
"Do you even know where it is?" he asks making Carlos pause.
"No, but I'll find it!" he shouts back before running out the door.
He tries to find his way around the underground system of London before googling the HQ and where it was. He eventually got there into the reception checking to see it was 4pm, not the end of office work day so maybe he would catch you.
"Hi there, really sorry. Looking for a Y/N?" he asks and the older lady looks over at him with a frown.
"Business?" she says in a posh British accent.
"Erm..." he couldn't think of anything to say.
"She's a friend of mine from Uni, from Cambridge" he smiles and she looks over him.
"Well, you just missed her, she left for the day about 10 minutes ago!" she offers and he sighs.
"Enbankment!" he says before running out the building. He runs down to the underground and he starts to look around all the people on the platform.
You were stood there, leaning against the underground wall and reading your book.
Carlos eyes were darting around the platform, he could make deductive reasoning. He was looking for a 24 year old fashionista and when his eyes met yours, it was like something in him just knew that it was you.
You looked at him with your head cocked to the side in confusion as to why this man was looking like that as you. However, as the tube pulled into the station your gaze wavered as you made your way on.
Carlos was in awe that he wasn't moving until someone ran past him to try catch the door. He realized you were gone and must be on the train, so he did the same getting on as the doors were closing into separate compartment.
He waited and at every stop he'd poke his head out to see if you got off. At one particularly busy stop, some people get off and a bunch of people push on before he can poke his head out, he gravitates back towards the front and sees your hair in the little bow walk away and towards the exit.
He pushes through and jumps out the doors just as they are about to close. He runs up the only stairs that are there seeing you at the top swiping a rail card onto the scanner and being let out of the gates.
He runs foreward swiping his own card.
"Hello, sir... can we take a minute of your time to talk about Climate Change!" a protester stops him, with a smile on his face where he looks behind her to see you stepping out into the sun lit street.
"I'm really sorry! No! I'm late to meet someone!" he explains before pushing past and running through the gate swiping the Oyster Card he owned from when he worked with McLaren.
He runs out onto the street where you did letting his eyes adjust to the light as he looks around for you. His eyes catch the long dress you were wearing, it was colourful and red, a colour he considered his since working for Ferrari.
He saw you walking into a building block and started to run towards the traffic lights and presses the button straight away. He waits for the green man before running across apologising to anybody he bumped into. He finds the entrance seeing security there and panics.
God they'd think he was crazy if he asked them to let him in. But then again. He was Carlos Sainz!
"Hey, I was hoping i could look round the building. I'm thinking of letting a place!" he smiles his puppy smile at the two guards on the gate who turn to him with stoic expressions before noticing who it is.
"Yeah sure! That's fine! Can we get a picture with you? Me and my son are huge fans!" he exclaims making Carlos nod. After he walks into the building looking around for a map of where rooms were.
36 - thats what he was looking for.
17th floor, he got into the lift and pressed the number shooting up. He fixed his hair in the lift getting nervous to meet you, this complete stranger.
Why was he even doing this?
He exists the elevator and walks down the corridor to your apartment and stands outside. He waits for what feels like forever before he knocks on the door.
He waits and then there you are in front of him.
"Hi" he breathes out looking over your gorgeous features.
"Can I help you?" you ask looking over him. You could sort of remember his face, but from where you didn't know right now.
"Erm, I!" he starts.
"Wait your the guy i saw in the tube, did you ... follow me here?" you ask stepping out the apartment shutting the door behind you so he couldn't get in if he was a crazy person.
"Yes. But, your Y/N, you should be 24 right now. You went to Cambridge and studied Fashion design and live in a country with a famous monarchy. You work for a Mr McQueen which actually means Alexander McQueen where you use the tube to get to work each day and live at apartment 36" Carlos breathes out all in one breath, you cock your head to the side in curiosity wondering why they were such specific facts until he pulls out a sheet of paper that you never thought you'd see again.
"No!" you laugh putting a hand over your mouth.
"Where did you find this!" you ask looking up at the man in awe.
"A beach in Mallorca" he offers scratching the back of his neck trying to work out what you were thinking right now.
"I chucked this off a boat in Australia on my 21st birthday" you gasp in shock at how far it had come.
"My family has a holiday home in Mallorca and it was on the beach where I run everyday!" he smiles nodding.
"And you actually came to find me?" you laugh in shock thinking it was a silly thing your mum would always tell you was how your family did things. Its how she found your dad, how you nan found your grandad and how your aunt found your uncle.
"Well, I did find it. I was curious!" he grins, looking at you and you look around the corridor before you bite your lip.
"Did you maybe want to talk about all this craziness over dinner?" you ask looking up at him.
"I'd love that!" he smiles, holding a hand out for you.
"I cant believe you found me!" you smile, placing a kiss on his cheek making them turn a little pink.
"Mmmm I did find you! All from the Bottle."
Taglist:
@littlesatanicassholebitch @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @stupidandunnecessary @clayra-g @daemyratwst @honey-belden @moonypixel @lauralarsen @vader-is-hot @ironcowboycopnickel @itsjustkhaos @the-untamed-soul @beebo86 @happylittlereader @ziejustme @lou-larcher5 @thewulf @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @chillyleclerc @chanthereader @annoyingmoonballoon @summissss @evieepepi08 @havaneseoger08 @celesteblack08 @gulphulp @fandom1ruined2me @celebstories @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhh @georgeparisole @dakotatankbig @youcannotcancelquidditch @zzonsbeek @tallbrownhairsarcastic @mellowarcadefun @ourteenagetragedy @otako5811 @countingstacksandpanicattacks @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @hopexcroc @mirrorball-6 @spilled-coffee-cup @mehrmonga @bigsimperika @blueberry64857959 @eiraethh @lilypadlover @curseofhecate @alliwantisadonut @the-fem1n1ne-urge @21stcenturytaegi @dark-night-sky-99 @spideybv28 @i-wish-this-was-me @tallrock35 @butterfly-lover @barnestatic @landossainz @darleneslane @barcelonaloverf1life @r0nnsblog @ilove-tswizzle @kapsylia @laneyspaulding19 @lazybot @malynn @cassielikereading @viennakarma @teamnovalak @landosgirlxoxo @marie0v @jlb20416 @yourbane @teamnovalak @nikfigueiredo @fionaschicken @0picels0 @seomako @urdad-hot @formula1mount @tinydeskwriter @butterfly-lover @ironmaiden1313
266 notes · View notes
mystellenia · 17 hours
Text
giving ellie a hoodie full of kisses ୨ৎ
Tumblr media
summary: you paint a hoodie with kisses for ellie, and the gesture flusters her.
content: nothing much, just ellie being shy
notes: answer to this req!! i'm trying a new format of posts. sometimes i see people do not quite hcs but also not quite a normal, paragraph-formatted fic. its like this in between of bullet points????? idk let me know if yall like it
(wc 0.6 k)
Tumblr media
after spending an hour on painting your lips and pressing them to the cloth of the hoodie you'd gotten for ellie, you sat back and examined your work
you had to admit: the hoodie looked beautiful. but! you did not!!!! your lips were stained red from the paint, your back hurt from hunching over to kiss the hoodie, and you'd probably ingested about an ounce of red40!!! (i know red 40 is in food but let me be silly)
after washing the paint that had gotten on your skin off in the sink, you ironed the sweatshirt to seal the paint in (don't ask me how that works bc idk i just saw it on tiktok like 10 mins ago)
and now we wait for ellie to come home!!
when she finally comes in, she throws her keys on the table near the door and toes her dusty, disintegrating, been-to-bethlehem-and-back converse, bc have you seen them. one day she's gonna take a step and they're gonna turn into a cloud of dust i swear
anyway you're sitting on the couch with your phone in your lap, the painted sweatshirt folded into a square with the kisses hidden inside. she walks towards you and gives you a lil kissy kiss on the forehead like hiiii
you get all smiley because you're excited for her to see the sweatshirt and she gets all suspish.... like what's so funny....
sooooooo.... you tell her you made her something and unfold the hoodie and hold it up to your body so she can see the full thing. and she would soooo get all beet red, like, "...you made this for me?"
and you're like "yes of course do you like it queen" then she gets over the like flusteredness (????(actually i revoke my ???? bc i just made that a word)) and gets so happi like yayyy!!!!
then she looks all confused at your lips and is like "is that why your lips look so severely chapped and red?"
and you get mad so you take away kiss privileges so she does the only reasonable thing which is putting you in a headlock to force kiss you
would definitely immediately put it on and go look in the mirror at her with it on. she'll start geeking and thank you and all that jazz
she would wear that shit 24/7. sleeping working showering shitting ANYWHERE best believe she has that hoodie on. and you tell her its been like 2 weeks of her wearing it nonstop so she needs to wash it but she refuses bc she doesn't want the kisses to start fading. u wash it anyway bc its dirty and she cold shoulders you for about 30 mins before she sees some dumb reel she just has to show you (me fr).
i feel like she's a hot sleeper--like she gets too hot at night to wear the hoodie but she still wants it so she'll just hold it as a baby blanket of sorts and Whatnot.
wait very unrelated but does anyone have a baby blanket that they've had for so long its like basically just threads thats so funny
but overall she loves it. she likes to kiss the kiss prints you made on the sweatshirt bc it's "like kissing you."
there was one time she couldn't find it for like 2 days (because you'd washed it since she never does) and she tried to act all nonchalant and unaffected like she wasn't about to start tweaking and like twitching
then you gave it to her all calm because it was literally just in the wash and she was like "what😨😨😨 where did you find it😨😨😨" and you just tell her it was in the wash and shes like "oh that makes sense"
Tumblr media
pls im so sorry. before i say anything i would like to formally apologize to the anon who submitted the ask for this bc this is so shit. you ask me for a product and this is how i repay you!! shame on me. please dilly dally on over to my asks and ask me something else so i can actually, i don't know, do a good job!! this ask was cute tho u ate with that
@picklesarenice69
i hate this i hate this i hate this! wow i hate this format so much this is the first and last time i will be doing this!!! i’m only posting this bc its been like a week since i last posted and the citizens will soon revolt, which the city's defenses cannot afford!! we're about to run out of wheat like times are getting tough. maybe i should just try just headcanons 🤔
can you tell i was fighting demons to not make this my normal vocab and format. like just look at this sentence and how it progresses: "when she finally comes in, she throws her keys on the table near the door and toes her dusty, disintegrating, been-to-bethlehem-and-back converse, bc have you seen them." the way that sentence progresses is just the silly demons taking over and also my coping mechanism for grimacing at how much i hate this format
like i just couldnt take myself seriously. "yes of course do you like it queen" HELLO??? WHY DID I TYPE THAT but i will not be fixing and/or deleting it bc its making me giggle
dont get me wrong some of you ladies chew it up but i am made for unreasonably long and time consuming fics!!! i’m getting heated too bc not only is this so short and quick to do but it also takes less focus and brain power and ofc i had to make things hard for myself and hate it!!! i’m soooooooooooo silly
edit: wait i would like to clarify that i just hate this because perhaps i’m not used to it. if you guys like this maybe i'll do more bc i follow the clout always 💯
146 notes · View notes
hotvintagepoll · 2 days
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Propaganda
Chelo Alonso (Sign of Rome Morgan the Pirate La ragazza sotto il lenzuolo)— She was an international star, and she was so hot she had to turn down marrying a prince, and became so famous for being hot that Fidel Castro sent Che Guevara to beg her to go back to Cuba. She was also called the Cuban H-Bomb. She makes me light-headed.
Monica Vitti (L’Avventura, La Notte, Modesty Blaise)— I've been hearing from my dad and uncle about how gorgeous she was since before I even knew I was into women and I can now confirm this mythical status. Also the variety of vibes in her filmography is impressive. She worked with Antonioni, Ettore Scola, Buñuel and other big name directors and also did spy romps and biker girl adventure movies and such. There are many images of her with Alain Delon that have the power to make bisexuals lose their minds I think.
This is round 2 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.
[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]
Chelo Alonso:
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
"forgive me sending in more pictures of her but i CANNOT be normal about here asdhgkljhahgjkhgkajshgajghshgjl"
Tumblr media
Monica Vitti:
Tumblr media
I have a soft spot for her because she's not only a very good actor, she's also absolutely gorgeous, stunning, a total babe, funny (*the* most acclaimed comedy actress of her age on the same level of Alberto Sordi and Marcello Mastroianni) AND her voice is super sexy. I know she's not well known outside of Italy so she probably won't get very far, but I submit her so she can at least be known! Check her out she deserves it! I tried to find the USA/UK titles of her films, but in any case she's on imdb.
what can I say but those freckles and those eyes!
Tumblr media
She's one of the most beautiful women I've ever seen, she had such a unique face. She was also a very bright and fun woman, I've watched a particular interview of hers where she talks about comedy and what it means to her and I was mesmerized, she spoke in such a charming and intelligent way. Sadly it's in Italian and I'm pretty sure there are no English subs for it (or for any interviews of hers). She's one of the most famous and beloved Italian movie stars in Italy, she had many leading roles in the 60s and she worked with actor Marcello Mastroianni and director Michelangelo Antonioni, who are both internationally famous.
Tumblr media
99 notes · View notes
tiyoin · 2 days
Note
Now I'm thinking about twisted anxiety reader being able to sing really well. I feel like there could be some very interesting/funny moments (4 us not reader).
Reader probably only sings in a reclusive area like a forest around the dorm
I wanna say that the forest already has haunting rumors about it ,and when someone (jade or rook) hears reader singing they think that the "ghost" is up and active again. So students start doing a "test of courage" type thing.
I put Jade or Rook being the one to hear reader cuz they're really the only ones that would really be in that area without a reason.
I also know they're intelligent enough to know it's not a ghost ,but start the rumor anyways cuz they want to know who's singing. And it becomes this big thing the school trying to figure out.
Cut to reader losing her mind cuz she like "wow, I didn't know people thought it was that bad. How am I supposed to live, laugh, love ever again??"
When in reality they were just memorized by reader's singing. And they really want to find out who it is.
Bonus points if they film it and sent it to the group chat you posted about earlier. And reader just has to be like 🧍‍♀️ "whattt???? No way!! 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ a random voice in the woods 😱😱"
I'm sorry for sending 2 long asks back 2 back ,but twisted anxiety just gets my head going.
Also if you don't like being sent stuff like this just tell me and I won't send any more. I don't want to over step at all. These are just like head cannons I give to reader ,cuz I just love making things worse for her. Can't let her know what peace is
YOU
hOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET IN MY HEAD 🫵
i’m going to give you the fattest smooch alive you don’t understand. AND I LOVE IT WHEN I GET LONG ASKS!!! so please! ask away i don’t mind, i actually get really flattered that people want to share with me their long, detailed thoughts !! i was actually nervous people wouldn’t like my long responses 😖
no cause that’s ALWAYS one troupe i ALWAYS go back to.
i was thinking about making them a singer, REALLY I WAS- but i had second thoughts cause i thought people wouldn’t like it / maybe people would think its too… y-nie or im trying to make twisted anxiety reader too much, ya know
BUT OH MY GOD I LOVE YOU MEAH MWAH (also dw i got your other ask and fully plan on answering it, this one was just at the top of my inbox 🫶🫶)
but oh my god,,,, HEAR ME OUT;
twisted anxiety reader getting pent up because they. have. no. outlet.
none.
maybe they played a sport in their old world, but no longer can’t because seriously?? going up against beastmen, mermen, fae and just,,, men?! absolutely not.
they can’t do anything fun in ramshackle because of the ghosts can and will find a way to stick their noses into your business. also hello??? no privacy at ramshackle👎👎
honestly, twisted anxiety reader doesn’t have any friends so they can’t blow off steam that way either. and going to the gym is out of the question because 1. anxiety 2.gym bros- and working out at home is… different.
so there has to be a way to let off steam… good thing twisted anxiety reader dilly dallied in everything!!
they want to sing but aren’t confident enough to join the pop music club, and the walls to ramshackle are paper thin.
there’s absolutely no where you can go.
and yet… every time you glance at the forest. you can’t help but wonder…🤔
AND IVE ALWAYS IMAGINED READER SINGING
“everything stays” from adventure time
“love all mine” by mitski
“rises the moon” by liana flores
“sky fall” by adele
“memory” from cats
“listen” by beyoncé
“hopelessly devoted” by olivia newton-john
oh my god i have to make a separate post for this before i completely rot and accidentally write a whole chapter because i’ve been WAITING to write about this and i’d feel bad about making this SUPER LONG
but i can’t imagine rook going for a sunset “hike” (…sure, let’s go with that) and hearing you. belting your little heart to “hopelessly devoted” HAGFJAIWOFOSOWOFOAPEIFOZOQFOXOD
Tumblr media
ROOK IS AWE STRUCK
such passion! such devotion! how marvelously beautiful! rook is stunned.
of course after you finish singing he can hear you moan and groan about trivial things but- rook hunt was not a hunt if he didn’t appreciate the gift the forest provided.
and yet, the carful hunter made a careless mistake. cursing silently, he glared at the twig his boots stepped on before he snapped his head up to the clearing up ahead.
ah, you fled.
to say rook was… upset was an understatement. yes he was able to marvel in your voice, but he lost the privilege to listen to more, to observe from afar.
the strange songs you sang and possibly wrote (what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him) are gone with the wind and the high step of your foot as you vanished into thin air.
rook could easily hunt you down, but he stopped himself after a slight muscle twitch. non non! he was the enjoyer of beauty! not the hunter! yes he hunted beauty but it would go against his very being to trap it instead of let it fly free and continue its song.
so let this be your little secret, okay.
jade would def walk into you singing ‘everything stays’
OR OR ROOK N JADE BOTH TAG TEAMING READER IN THE CHAT SAYING HOW THEY WISH TO MEET THIS BEAUTIFUL VOICED GOREST ‘NYMPH’ SO THEY CAN HEAR MORE OF THEIR SONGS
readers just like;
😟
“time to find a new location☝️”
*there’s no where those two won’t be able to find you fyi*
TWISTED ANXIETY READER WILL NEVER KNOW PEACE‼️‼️ NOT AS LONG AS IM HERE‼️‼️
please send more headcanons i love reading them 🙇🏻🙇🏻
babes this is me n u rn:
Tumblr media
40 notes · View notes
ladytessa74 · 2 hours
Note
hi tessa!! in reference to this post
CAN WE BE FRIENDS PLS?
okay for questions:
since you don't watch OG 911, how did you stumble upon lone star?
if you could write one episode of season 5, what would it include?
what's your favorite pastime/hobby outside of fandom?
i was about to ask you what your favorite season is, then i remembered you live in the land where its warm all year around haha
what's your favorite food? do you like to cook?
i know you said you're hoping to get a dog in the future, ARE YOU A DOG PERSON? plus, do you have a certain breed in mind or just gonna wing it? lol
okay this is probably way more than you wanted lol but notice how i didnt say the thing!
Rachel you 'didn't say the thing' so loud that you may as well have SAID IT. ok so you are in jail now and who says there's no thought police?? i am the thought police.
👮🏽‍♀️
since you don't watch OG 911, how did you stumble upon lone star?
Actually I followed some people over from the old guard fandom! I was very taken with Joe and Nicky, my favorite immortal grandpas.
I loved that fandom and it has so many talented writers but I think they had a lot of problems with racism? Given Joe / Yusuf is a Middle Eastern man and Nicky is Italian. And people were very defensive. I was very late to this fandom so I didn't see any of the racism myself, but I only saw people being (maybe rightfully so) defensive and though I agreed with everything they were saying (I am a WOC myself, very VERY familiar with casual and non casual racism), I had a lot of negative/angry posts on my dash, so I can't say I felt very welcome and trailed off after a while
Tumblr media
Then suddenly came across TK & Carlos kissing on my dash. At first I didn't take any notice, I just thought they were very cute. Then I think I saw a video of the proposal + few more gifs and i was immediately like 😭😭😭😭 This was at the end of season 3. Then I went back and watched from the beginning and it was so good and I was hooked!
Tumblr media
if you could write one episode of season 5, what would it include?
ONLY ONE??!! Listen I want the writers to make How I linger completely from top to bottom, however many episodes it takes! This was my basic wishlist for S5 for Carlos' father's death arc, so it could be spread over 2-3 episodes. TIM. CALL ME. IT'S NOT TOO LATE.
Other than that, I want to write Halloween episode 🥺 TK & Carlos will host a Halloween party in their apartment. They will bicker about costumes and finally decide to go as each other, no matter now nauseatingly cute it is! Lou II gets a spiderman costume 🤭 Carlos refuses to put it on him, so TK does it, but Lou II gets free and wreaks havoc on the apartment, leaping into punch bowls, running into peoples' clothes and eating things that make him sick so now they have to go find a vet in the middle of the night. They stumble on some emergency in the street, maybe a lost kid. Kid reunited, Lou II fine, guests gone. TK & Carlos have sex for 48 hours straight.
Paul hates Halloween and won't talk about it. Everyone walks on eggshells around him. They say 'costume party' as Carlos won't let anyone say 'Halloween' lest it upset his friend. Everyone thinks it has to do with a major trauma from his childhood. In the end it's revealed that when he was taken trick or treating as a child, he came across a very realistic witch and screamed and punched her in the knee and it was actually his English teacher.
what's your favorite pastime/hobby outside of fandom?
Oh, writing? 👀 I'm working on an original fiction book 👀 I think it's a big risk because it's supposed to be humorous but I'll try anyway! I hope it's funny. I'm still writing it.
And also I have taken up crochet again recently 🥰
i was about to ask you what your favorite season is, then i remembered you live in the land where its warm all year around haha
LA?!?@ It's cold here during the winters! The nights dip to 55 😔 And it's been raining recently 😔
ok don't slap me rachel 🤭
My favorite season is fall! Also summer for the fruits 🥰 especially mangoes 🥭🥭🥭🥭🥭🥭
what's your favorite food? do you like to cook?
I love cooking. I love Indian food the most, closely followed by Mexican, Italian.
i know you said you're hoping to get a dog in the future, ARE YOU A DOG PERSON? plus, do you have a certain breed in mind or just gonna wing it? lol
I AM. I love dogs so much. 🐶 I'm going to get a Bernedoodle! A Buttercup doggie 🤭 I'm on this waitlist, so I'm not sure exactly when, but soon. Sooon!!
22 notes · View notes
thelreads · 3 days
Note
I've been taking notes on the spypocalypse so I can keep my thoughts in order and actually I ended up noticing something:
First, a lot of other slice of life sitcoms don't have character development because they need to keep the characters the same for the format. But as a result the characters can end up feeling stale because they don't develop and thus the creators fall back constantly on the same jokes. But what I like about spy x family is that the characters are slowly growing, even if that means sacrificing the jokes. Like, Endo is letting Anya slowly get better at studying and Yor slowly get better at cooking, so even though we still have jokes about how Anya is not the best at school or that Loid is a better cook than Yor, we also get to move past it so the jokes don't become old.
Second, in other manga that have serious and funny moments, I find that there isn't often a lot of crossover, character-development wise. Like, in SxF, Fiona running off to the mountains to train in tennis is a gag... And then it saves her life during the mole arc. Likewise, there's gags about Yuri being indestructible because of Yor, and then during the Yuri v. Twilight showdown he is actually really able to keep getting up.
So that probably means that the next time Twilight and Yuri go up against each other, we'll see a return of Yor-fu.
And last thing: even though there haven't been a lot of chapters that let us see it, I think Yor is definitely getting a lot more feelings for Loid. When she first moved in, Yor didn't even know if she and Loid would be sleeping in the same room. She was a bit bashful around him, but it was really only when she was super drunk that she went tomato-face mode (when Yuri told her to kiss Loid, when Loid tried to honey trap her, and then later the welcome home kiss). However, when they went to the murder ski lodge, even though she was completely sober and Anya and Bond were *right there*, she went super blushing flustered mode at the idea of sleeping in the same room as Loid. Ah, yeah, it's all coming together.
Ok for real last thing: also I think the reason why Sigmund's tutoring worked better than Yuri or Loid's is because those two focus on one thing and get through it. They're both determinators who have no problem with snapping into focus on one thing at a time. Meanwhile Anya's mind has a tendency to wander. However, look at how Sigmund deals with it: when Anya turns Yuri's "whole enchilada" into the "swole Chihuahua", Yuri tells her to forget it and go back to focusing on the grammar. But when Anya takes Sigmund's "eureka" and turns it into "eucalyptus", Sigmund encourages her ("oh, you know so much about koalas! You'll ace your biology test!" And she may not have gotten a Stella star for it, but given that her only bolt was from math, she at least passed her bio quiz). Sigmund works with her wandering train of thought while gently pushing her back to the task at hand. Anya is a force of nature who conquers all in her way; Twilight and Yuri don't stand a chance trying to fight against her head on, but Grandpa Siggy knows how to work with the Lord of Storms.
Grandpa's are great, I'm gonna be so sad when it turns out Sigmund is a founding member of the Apple Project.
Oh, I like that slow development. It's so subtle and gradual you don't really notice it until something major happens and it all clicks together.
Yor is definitely getting more feelings. Yeah, she was not as embarrassed at first because she didn't really liked Twilight the way she does now. He was a handsome man and she was bashful, but now that she does like him like that, now that she's getting aware of her own feelings, oh now the fun begins...
And Sigmund there was definitely the right choice to teach Anya, and he does manage to get in her head because he has a lot of experience on the subject, he was a teacher for years, he understands the human brain because of his work as a researcher. Also because he knows how to handle test subjects from project apple after all.
20 notes · View notes
wyvernquill · 1 year
Text
Today I offer you the following headcanon/scenario: Hob dislikes Shakespeare and criticises him, but not because he's jealous of Dream walking off with him in 1589... no, it's because he genuinely thinks the man was a talentless hack.
Let me elaborate.
Hob does like Shakespeare's plays, and grudgingly admits they're the work of a "half-decent playwright", judging from the 1789 scene. He does appreciate the craftsmanship.
The only trouble: Hob is of the opinion that it's not technically Will's work at all. It's His Stranger who had... well, some hand, at least, in the creation of those masterpieces, and Hob hates that Shakespeare gets the sole credit.
(Now, to be clear, I do think that all Dream did was lend Shakespeare support and inspiration and the power to put his own dreams and imaginations into words. It's absolutely still William Shakespeare's work at the core, and Dream's involvement is hardly much more than in any other story ever written - but Hob doesn't know exactly how this works, does he?)
Imagine his frustration. Imagine people praising Shakespeare as a genius in front of him, and Hob bursting to say "actually, he was total shite until he sold his soul or something to the maybe-devil in exchange for talent". He thinks he's the only human in the world who knows The Truth About Will Shaxberd, and it drives him mad that any attempt to explain it would make him sound like some conspiracy nut.
It's the sort of thing that could drive a man to irrationally hate a playwright and his ill-gotten gains, it really could.
(Which is highly hypocritical of him, seeing as he himself enjoys the boon of that very same maybe-devil - well, his sister’s, actually, not that Hob knows that - but it's aBOUT THE PRINCIPLE OF THE THING-)
And that's how Hob ends up as his university's #1 Shakespeare Hater.
.
And perhaps, Dream eventually explains to him who he is and how his boons work, and Hob suddenly realises he has to revise his entire spiteful opinion of William Shakespeare, who may have had a certain spark of talent of his own, after all...
And then, groping desperately for some reason to cling on to his increasingly irrational dislike of the man, Hob recalls how Will stole his date back in 1589, and breathes a sigh of relief at the realisation that he can carry on hating Shakespeare just as much as before, only now for a different reason.
(Not that saying "I hate Shakespeare because he stole my boyfriend" will make him sound any less like a nutter than insisting his talent came from magical intervention... but, well, it's a step in the right direction, isn’t it.)
719 notes · View notes
multishipper-baby · 8 days
Text
Baby fever so bad I've been thinking about the ideal number of kids for characters. What is wrong with me.
#no main tag#anyway. I think for freddy it would depend. he's the anxious type- so having just one kid would be a lot for him#I'd imagine his decision of having another baby would be impacted a lot by how the first kid went#if everything was mostly alright he'd be all for it- if shit went sideways he would forever dread having a second one#fred doesn't like children. so... he probably wouldn't have any if not tied to freddy. and even then would insist on only one#chica... I think she'd like two. I've heard headcanons that she has younger siblings#and I see her as the type to want to want that for her children too#although I also imagine she would want to have her kids later in life... mid 30s maybe#fox I also see as someone who wouldn't really want kids- especially since I headcanon him as trans#he doesn't want to be pregnant and he doesn't want to dedicate years of his life raising a child#when he already spent most of his childhood having to take care of meg since they didn't have any parents#maybe if his partner wanted to adopt. and they adopted a slightly older child instead of a baby. but that's a big maybe#bonnie... I'm not too sure honestly. I feel like he values his freedom and would want to enjoy his youth#but I don't think he'd be against having a kid or two (maybe even three)#also I find the idea of him having lots of kids funny because. bunny lol#so idk about him#golden meanwhile I fully believe would want a big family. he felt so alone growing up and he's so starved for love#so he dreams of having his own family with lots of kids living in a big house and being very happy <3#I think he'd be happy with up to five kids lmao. although he understands if his partner would rather have less#he'd definitely want at least two though. he always thought having a sibling would've made his childhood less lonely and sad#so he wants that for his own babies :')#I was going to say more characters but now I'm embarrassed lol goodnight
4 notes · View notes
lepakonpaska · 4 months
Text
caution, gay joy and rambling in the tags ⚠️
3 notes · View notes
moe-broey · 1 year
Text
Screaming crying throwing up curled up on yhe floor sobbing weeping ect ect I miss them SO much (PNGs with voice lines that live in my phone that I can look at any time)
#FINALLY picked up engage again and collected all the dlc emblems (from both waves)#saved veronica for last bc i knew she'd be the one i'd be the most autistic about#i love her she's SO funny. chronic baby disease. insisting we're working for her actually.#completely out of touch with her own emotions (FELT).#bloodlust.#she really does have the funniest combination of traits and i love that for her#but MAN..... her map and her EXISTING as a 3d model ON A CONSOLE GAME.....#getting this TINY glimpse into what askr/embla would look like in a 3d space........ (feel like the map is more modeled after askr?)#i feel so fucking rabid about it. frothing at the mouth. i am SO normal (LYING THROUGH CLENCHED TEETH)#i'm just imagining a perfect world where we also have emblem alfonse and sharena in a bracelet together.#i KNOW sharena would get shafted but indulge me. do not separate them first of all.#and second i just think it would be insanely interesting actually???? like. how is alfonse coping.#i think becoming a jewelry ghost would be on the top ten list of worst things to happen to him specifically#i think he'd put his all into serving whoever has him as now this is his responsibility. he is just as closed off as ever though#if not worse having to go through centuries of losing anyone he'd accidentally make any connection with#sharena is probably the only reason he's somewhat sane. she grounds him.#and also sharena???? ohhh i think there is SO much potential there!! she is always SO eager to hopefully befriend --#anyone who finds their bracelet.#i think being trapped in a bracelet has had the opposite effect on her. her desire for outside connection#and friendship only gets stronger. i think the loneliness stings more.#and i think having them together like. HUGE potential to put them side by side and see how they really do parallel each other#same issues different ways of coping. different reactions. i think their engage skill would reflect this. somehow.#also i think they'd both look soooo cute in the engage artstyle 😭😭😭😭#what the fuck ever. explode 💥💥💥
8 notes · View notes
Text
a coworker recently complimented me by saying I’m calm under pressure, which
a) thanks, but also b) lol. lmao, even
5 notes · View notes
bluehairperson · 2 years
Note
hi,, Valerius for the character bingo, pls?
(you're one of my favorite artists btw!!)
Aw, THANK YOU 😭💙💙
Tumblr media
MY BOY 😭💙 I love him dearly.
#the pathetic excuse of a man that has been consuming my every thought for over a year#wish I could kiss him on the forehead as if he were a cat#I get that the devs probably only thought of him as a mini villain and comic relief Which he's absolutely great as btw#but yeah he has SO MUCH potential it's really a shame he doesn't get more attention both in canon and by the fans#they wanted a funny character and accidentally ended up with an extremely layered and interesting individual who has one of the absolute#coolest looking arcana patrons key scenes and character themes but like ok go off#the scene in nadia's route when we find him in his half demon form in the catacombs of the hierophant's realm surrounded by skeletons#wearing elaborate and rich clothing is literally one of the coolest visuals I've ever read in my life and I just have to be ok with the#fact that it's only two lines of text and not a full illustration... ok#the fact that he has seen his lover being turned to fucking ash and had to lead a whole ass city almost by himself for three years while#having to mourn alone alchoholism and making deals with the devil like OK SURE TOTALLY NOT EXTREMELY FASCINATING CHARACTER KEYS#also where was my boy in Lucio's route??? where is my canon pre plague content with them?? devs please respond#I'm outside of your houses banging at the door please open I just want to talk#lately some of my friends told me they started to get interested in him solely because of my drawings and that makes me very happy#please like my boy he's so cool#asks
19 notes · View notes
palepinkycat · 2 years
Note
🍻 for Lenka &/or anyone else you’d like to share for? c:
Thanks so much for the ask @mimabeann ^^ I've already answered this for Lenka so I'm gonna go with the Cold Stare & Sharp Cheekbones family
🍻: What's your OC's favourite comfort ritual? How do they calm themselves down after a rough day?
Tumblr media
Oktavian
I only have those silly expression meme art of them sorry :")
He really needs some self care tips 🙃 He gets bonus points for trying but he hardly ever has time to focus solely on himself. He likes to lay on his bed (or the floor when he's really desperate lol) and watch the city lights flicker - or a candle flame in Dragon Age AU - but he's not really used to peaceful moments like this and the silence often makes him feel homesick. Sometimes he'll write letters to his siblings, even though Titus is the only one who writes back or share a glass of wine with Aedan. He usually goes for the second option, they'll have a deep conversation or just sit around, talk about nothing. He's Oktavian's best friend and the only person around which he can truly be himself - he can talk about his worries and emotions without feeling guilty about burdening him with his problems. Aside from all this, Oktavian and Veronica love taking long rides out of town, singing along to the radio, though they don't really do that often anymore. They usually listen to Queen, it's Oktavians favourite band.
Tumblr media
Titus
He and Veronica used to train ballet as children and while Vera hated every moment of it, Titus fell in love with dancing at the very first sight. He doesn't have time for ballet classes anymore, his mother made sure of that, but he still loves dancing, it helps him relieve stress. If he's had a really bad day, he'll read the letters he got from Oktavian or write some extremely honest/emotional letters himself though he usually ends up burning them, he doesn't want to worry his brother needlessly.
Tumblr media
Veronica
Bold of you to assume she can simply calm down. She'll most likely act as if nothing happened and lock up in her room/chamber though she's not very good at hiding her emotions so sooner or later someone will notice it.
If it's Aedan, he'll probably give her some time and space to sort it out herself but there's 50% chance he'll stay, they'll share a cigarette and have a conversation. They'll vent about Villem and Tevinter politics, talk about the past, Vera will tell Aedan he should quit smoking, he'll laugh it off, probably crack some depressing jokes about how miserable the two of them are. They'll stay on Veronica's balcony to watch the stars in silence. They might hold hands
If it's Oktavian, he won't leave her alone until she tells him what upset her. He usually suspects what happened but he'd prefer to know it from her than act on false assumptions. He'll stay with her for as long as she needs, he'll bring some food and read her a book if she feels like it. He's done that ever since they were kids, he has a very soothing voice and Vera loves listening to it. He'll also try to cheer her up with his dad/big brother jokes.
And if it's Titus, he'll burst into Veronica's room without asking, bring tons of snacks and watch Sabrina the Teenage Witch with her (it's her favourite show but shh). Indigo and Nunno will probably join them. When it comes to DA AU they'll most likely play cards until Titus one of them falls asleep on Vera's bed.
6 notes · View notes
nymfaia · 10 months
Text
more timeline fun, ft. My Ship + their bb. ft. @nossumusmanus since this ship + the ship's respective verse is fairly intertwined w/ quintus living at this point, lol
alta gets pregnant around the time of Pagl'than. either before or after. she is barely a few weeks along when Endwalker happens, and is Very Thoroughly Ill in Garlemald - something she thinks is a result of the corpses and the sheer horror of what has been done to Varis and the Tempered soldiers. It's early spring by the end of MSQ, and the snow is melting, exposing corpses that had not been able to rot in the cold, the sickened aether from the Tower making her feel nauseous and ill to her bones.
It is after their first excursion into the Tower that it truly rears it's head, and she is caught outside of camp kicking snow over the rations she failed to stomach. Jullus finds her crying and upset at herself for not keeping things together. After some encouragement, she bundles her uncertainty and despair back in, knowing she had a world to save.
(she's also sick in Thavnair, but - as she was sick from using the Aetheryte to travel there - she assumes it's just that, along with exhaustion and nerves.)
After the end of the main MSQ, Alta is quarantined in Sharlay for multiple, multiple weeks. She's still sick and she needs physical therapy and time to heal from her wounds. I think someone in Sharlay probably tried to tell her what state she was in, but she was convinced her injuries and her light aether corruption from Shadowbringers would cause the pregnancy to be a fluke. Out of fear of being known and having been cooped up for too long, she swiftly left after that to go aid the realm. By the time she leaves, she's just shy of three months along.
She visits Thavnair first, subsisting almost exclusively on mint lassi to keep her from getting too sick on the palace's tiles. Vrtra pegs her and her coalescing aether almost immediately and does his best to respect her hostility, and Alta flees to the undersea vault with her former Scion allies before the greatwyrm can truly guilt her about it. (Unfortunately for her, Y'shtola's aether sight knows it just as well. Fortunately for her, she says little and less beyond a veiled tease that the Warrior of Light entirely does not get.)
As soon as she ties up that loose end, Alta returns back to Garlemald. Her illness has gotten better, but is still off and on depending on what she's doing. A few days into the stay, she learns about Quintus' lover and their state, and both her and Jullus make an attempt to gather supplies from a deserted medical clinic. They bring back a mobile ultrasound machine, medicines, and vitamins, stopping by Tertium for a rest. They find a retired nurse there who is able to show Alta that she was still with child - and closer now to four than three months along. With Jullus, she traverses back to Camp Broken Glass to retrieve Quintus and Nerva and returns back to Terncliff that same evening.
Alta is in Terncliff for less than one moon. She dances around telling him the truth, and finally does one evening when she thinks he's fallen asleep beside her, whispering the news in his ears as if testing words on for size. By the time he fully awakens in the late morning, she's already long gone - but he knows what he heard was not a mere dream.
She doesn't return to Garlemald, but Thavnair. The tear betwixt realms is explored, the first two of the Fiends felled, and Zero returned to the Source upon their collapse. Still desperate to avoid Gaius and what response he may give her, she travels back to Ilsebard.
She teams up with Jullus and Quintus to go through the tower for supplies, and the three of them run into Nerva Galvus - or nearly do. Removing Quintus from the palace was like pulling teeth, but both her and Jullus finally were able to convince him it wouldn't end well if they stayed. They resolve to return after sharing the news with the Alliance - and, after some needling and reminders of you swore, Alta admits she's about in the same boat as Nerva (and sheepishly apologies for being a bit spicy in Endwalker and beyond.)
Alta has gone from begrudgingly eating rations and a half to starving even after two, and feels guilty that she's sapping resources from Garlemald and it's people. Using magic has become a drain on her she hadn't expected, and her stamina for traveling has lessened. After they enter the palace for a final confrontation, putting what was left of Varis to rest in a funeral pyre, she returns to Terncliff. Her state is becoming obvious to those who knew her previously. (Tataru would be happy to see Alta gaining weight again, after how thin she had become during her trip to the First. Alta firmly does not tell the receptionist-turned-tailor. Half the realm would know by sunset, and she is stubborn in keeping those who know to a bare minimum. She is nigh five months and beginning to get quite tired of people asking questions.)
It's the first time she's fully explained what all went on in Garlemald in her visits. She couldn't stomach telling Gaius the truth before, but now she feels as if it's unavoidable. He knew things had been dire, but had no idea that Zenos had treated his father so similarly to Varro and his children.
He was not there for his children. He was not there to protect Varis. There had to be something he could do to repent to his homeland, if only to close that chapter wholly and soundly behind him. Gaius decides he needs to return, if only to visit the grave of his homeland one time before it begins anew.
So he and Severa take off, leaving Allie in Alta's care and Alta in Valdeaulin's. A week of feeling bored and thoroughly harassing Valdeaulin later, Alta takes Allie on a small trip abroad, just the two of them. Allie learns of her present state: Alta, going without her facepaint, flies mostly under the radar as the two act as tourists in Kugane. They return to Terncliff about ten days later and Alta has a linkpearl call almost as soon as the airship lands; the disbanded Scions prepared to go into the Thirteenth, but were informed of issues in Garlemald with voidsent.
Alta leaves Allie in Valdeaulin's care and returns to Garlemald once more. Alongside Gaius once again, the pieces begin to fall into place for those she is affiliated with - her closeness to him as they move about the camp, his challenging gaze when she volunteers overmuch, the meals they share side-by-side - it is painfully obvious what they had gotten themselves into. Alta travels into Lapis Manalis alongside three Scions and Zero, acting as a sub-healer. The third Fiend is eradicated, and they return to the Camp with many, many liters of ceruleum.
(She is instructed to stay in the vehicle and stay warm as they load their loot, and her absolute silence on the ride back has Alisaie being a little sassy about 'the savior of the world, pouting over not being allowed to help'. She is about six months along, and, despite her apology to Quintus for being uncouth and short-tempered, she is still both of those things. It has been years since she has been disallowed to act - doing so now feels like a curse instead of a nicety.)
Alta is taken back to Terncliff with Gaius, who is still in disbelief that she's still forging ahead despite not being able to button her coat any longer. She lurks about the town for nigh on a full moon, tending to the flower field her and Valdeaulin have been growing since her first visit to Terncliff after the end of the world; and, for a moment, she's enjoying the break... before the Scions call on her once more.
The fourth fiend is in need of being dispatched. So she does as they ask, as she always has, and isn't given a reprieve to return home before they make further progress: they've figured out how to get to the Thirteenth's moon, and she's needed.
First to aid in the Aetherfont, and then to travel betwixt the stars.
While she is tired and irritable at the beginning of their adventure to the island of Haam, the surplus of positive aether is a boon after months of feeling drained. Her spells are cast with ease, her mana well feels as if it is bottomless, and for the first time since visiting Elpis, she feels as if she is hale and whole. She carries the energy through to the Thirteenth's moon, and, while relying on her shards from beyond the rift, she is able to take down the Knight in Black.
After a short stint in Thavnair to rest, she does return, one final time, to Terncliff. Despite the small town's slow pace of living and it's lack of true adventure, Alta finally decides she needs a rest. She calls the Scions and their affiliates to inform them of her hiatus and then clicks off her linkpearl for the longest, quietest stretch of relaxation she has had in over five years. She is seven moons and a handful of suns, having traversed two realms and taken down more enemies than the 'disbandment' of the Scions had promised her. She loves them all dearly, but she is tired.
Gaius still has his own linkpearl connection with Estinien open, and is kept abreast of their machinations as Alta stays willfully ignorant. He knows the biggest battle is yet to reach them - to tear down the last bastion of evil in the Thirteenth - and he hopes it is at bay for long enough for the Warrior of Light to have a peaceful last few weeks.
When they come to be, it is to her surprise - not his - that Moogle mail carriers are inundated with gifts and well wishing cards. She thought she had been quiet about it. She thought no one had found out, outside of Jullus, and Quintus, and Nerva, and Alisaie, and Y'shtola and Vrtra and - ....
1 note · View note
maniculum · 6 months
Text
Medieval Scorpions Effortpost
So yesterday I reblogged this post featuring an 11th-century depiction of the Apocalypse Locusts from Revelations, noting the following incongruity as another medieval scorpion issue:
Tumblr media
The artist, as you can see, has interpreted "tails like scorpions" as meaning "glue cheerful-looking snakes to their butts".
Anyway, it occurred to me that the medieval scorpion thing might not be as widely known as I think it is, and that Tumblr would probably enjoy knowing about it if it isn't known already. So, finding myself unable to focus on the research I'm supposed to be doing, I decided to write about this instead. I'll just go ahead and put a cut here.
As we can see in the image above, at least one artist out there thought a "scorpion" was a type of snake. Which makes it difficult to draw "tails like scorpions", because a snake's tail is not that distinctive or menacing (maybe rattlesnakes, but they don't have those outside the Americas). So they interpreted "tails like scorpions" as "the tail looks like a whole snake complete with head".
Let me tell you. This is not a problem unique to this illustration.
See, people throughout medieval Europe were aware of scorpions. As just alluded to, they are mentioned in the Bible, and if the people producing manuscripts in medieval Europe knew one thing, it was Stuff In Bible. They're also in the Zodiac, which medieval Europe had inherited through classical sources. However, let's take a look at this map:
Tumblr media
That's Wikipedia's map of the native range of the Scorpiones order, i.e., all scorpion species. You may notice something -- the range just stops at a certain northern latitude. Pretty much all of northern Europe is scorpion-free. If you lived in the north half of Europe, odds were good you had never seen a scorpion in your life. But if you were literate or educated at all, or you knew they were a thing, because you'd almost certainly run across them being mentioned in texts from farther south. And those texts wouldn't bother to explain what a scorpion was, of course -- everyone knows scorpions, right? When was the last time you stopped to explain What Is Spiders?
So medieval writers and artists in northern Europe were kind of stuck. There was all this scorpion imagery and metaphor in the texts they liked to work from, but they didn't really know what a scorpion was. Writers could kind of work around it (there's a lot of "oh, it's a venomous creature, moving on"), but sometimes they felt the need to break it down better. For this, of course, they'd have to refer to a bestiary -- but due to Bestiary Telephone and the persistent need of bestiary authors to turn animals into allegories, one of the only visual details you got on scorpions was that they... had a beautiful face, which they used to distract people in order to sting them.
And look. I'm not here to yuck anyone's yum, but I would say that a scorpion's face has significant aesthetic appeal only for a fairly small segment of the population. I'm sure you could get an entomologist to rhapsodize about it a bit, but your average person on the street will not be entranced by the face of a scorpion. So this did not help the medieval Europeans in figuring out how to depict scorpions. There was also some semantic confusion -- see, in some languages (such as Old and Middle English), "worm" could be a general term for very small animals of any kind. But it also could mean "serpent".* So there were some, like our artist at the top of the post, who were pretty sure a scorpion was a snake. This was probably helped along by the fact that "venomous" was one of the only things everyone knew about them, and hey, snakes are venomous. Also, Pliny the Elder had floated the idea that there were scorpions in Africa that could fly, and at least one author (13th-century monk Bartholomaeus Anglicus) therefore suggested that they had feathers. I don't see that last one coming up much, I just share it because it's funny to me.
*English eventually resolved this by borrowing the Latin vermin for very small animals, using the specialized spelling wyrm for big impressive mythical-type serpents, and sticking with the more specific snake for normal serpents.
Some authors, like the anonymous author of the Ancrene Wisse, therefore suggested that a scorpion was a snake with a woman's face and a stinging tail. (Everyone seemed to be on the same page with regards to the fact that the sting was in the tail, which is in fact probably the most recognizable aspect of scorpions, so good job there.) However, while authors could avoid this problem, visual artists could not. And if you were illustrating a bestiary or a calendar, including a scorpion was not optional. So they had to take a shot at what this thing looked like.
And so, after this way-too-long explanation, the thing you're probably here for: inaccurate medieval drawings of scorpions. (There are of course accurate medieval drawings of scorpions, from artists who lived in the southern part of Europe and/or visited places where scorpions lived; I'm just not showing you those.) And if you find yourself wondering, "how sure are you that that's meant to be a scorpion?" -- all of these are either from bestiaries or from calendars that include zodiac illustrations.
Tumblr media
11th-century England, MS Arundel 60. (Be honest, without the rest of this post, if I had asked you to guess what animal this was supposed to be, would you have ever guessed “scorpion”?)
Tumblr media
12th-century Germany, "Psalter of Henry the Lion". (Looks a bit undercooked. Kind of fetal.)
Tumblr media
12th-century France, Peter Lombard's Sententiae. (Very colorful, itsy bitsy claws, what is happening with that tail?)
Tumblr media
12th-century England, "The Shaftesbury Psalter". (So a scorpion is some sort of wyvern with a face like a duck, correct?)
Tumblr media
13th-century France, Thomas de Cantimpré's Liber de natura rerum. (I’d give them credit for the silhouette not being that far off, but there’s a certain bestiary style where all the animals kind of look like that. Also note how few of these have claws.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, "The Bodley Bestiary". (Mischievous flying squirrel impales local man’s hand, local man fails to notice.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, Harley MS 3244. (A scorpion is definitely either a mouse or a fish. Either way it has six legs.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, Harley MS 3244. (Wait, no, it’s a baby theropod, and it has two legs. (Yes, this is the same manuscript, that’s not an error, this artist did four scorpions and no two are the same.))
Tumblr media
13th-century England, Harley MS 3244. (Actually it’s a lizard with tiny ears and it has four legs.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, Harley MS 3244. (Now that we’re at the big fancy illustration, I think I’ve got it — it’s like that last one, but two legs, longer ears, and a less goofy face. Also I’ve decided it’s not pink anymore, I think that was the main problem.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, MS Kk.4.25. (A scorpion is a flat crocodile with a bear’s head.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, "The Huth Psalter". (Wyvern but baby! Does not seem to be enjoying biting its own tail.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, MS Royal 1 D X. (This triangular-headed gentlecreature gets the award for “closest guess at correct limb configuration”. If two of those were claws, I might actually believe this artist had seen a scorpion before, or at least a picture of one.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, "The Westminster Psalter". (A scorpion is the offspring of a wyvern and a fawn.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, "The Rutland Psalter". (Too many legs! Pull back! Pull back!)
Tumblr media
13th or 14th-century France, Bestiaire d'amour rimé. (This is very similar to the fawn-wyvern, but putting it in an actual Scene makes it even more obvious that you’re just guessing.)
Tumblr media
14th-century Netherlands, Jacob van Maerlant's Der Naturen Bloeme. (More top-down six-legged guys that look too furry to be arthropods.)
Tumblr media
14th-century Germany, MS Additional 22413. (That is clearly a turtle.)
Tumblr media
14th-century France, Matfres Eymengau de Beziers's Breviari d'amor. (Who came up with that head shape and what was their deal?)
Tumblr media
15th-century England, "Bestiary of Ann Walsh". (Screw it, a scorpion is a big lizard that glares at you for trying to make me draw things I don’t know about.)
I've spent way too much time on this now. End of post, thank you to anyone who got all the way down here.
6K notes · View notes