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#but also trying to shove it away/shove it down
rafeandonlyrafe · 1 day
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bound and bruised
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words: 1.5k
warnings: 18+ only, NONCON!!!!, r*pe, male receiving oral, choking, p in v sex, unwilling sex, kidnapping, blacking out, loss of virginity, dead dove do not eat (PLEASE heed the warnings)
“stop fucking screaming.” rafe grunts out as you look up at him with tear stained cheeks.
“my knees!” you sob out. only moments ago rafe had shoved you down, bruising and scraping your knees against the rough flooring. you're sure they're going to be bruised by tomorrow.
“i don't care, bitch.” rafe says, gently slapping you on the cheek, more of a pat to get your attention back on him.
“you're being so mean.” you try to stand up, but rafes rough hand on your shoulder pushes you back down.
“stop trying to get away. you know you can't outrun me so you might as well just do as i say.”
“and what is it you want me to do?” you cross your arms as you glare up at rafe.
“easy.” he huffs out. “you're going to suck my dick.”
“your- your what?” you squeal, eyes widening when rafe reaches to his shorts, swiftly undoing the zipper and button, pulling the two sides of the flap open, but not pushing them down his hips yet.
“you heard me.” rafe smirks down at you, at the look on your face, one of confusion, verging on terror. “now im gonna take my dick out. and you're going to lick it.”
you try one more time to stand up, to flee and get away, but rafe is too strong, easily keeping you on your knees with one hand while the other frees himself from the confines of his clothes, kicking his shorts off before the underwear are also tugged down.
your eyes widen when you come face to face with rafes cock, hard and standing away from his body, much bigger than you could have imagined, but it fits his tall frame.
“i don't want to do this, rafe.” you whine. you've never sucked dick before, and you certainly don't want your first time to be with a guy you barely talk to.
“too bad. now lick it, it's for your own good.”
“what does that mean?” you question, but rafe doesn't respond, moving his hand to grip the hair at the back of your head as he pushes you forward.
your nose bumps his cock as you try to swivel your head out of the way, replaying rafes words in your head. 
you stick your tongue out, taking a cautious lick against his length. you make a face, spitting onto the ground. “this is gross, rafe!”
“you have about five seconds to start licking before i just shove my whole cock down your throat. go.”
you know rafes threat isn't an idle one, so you push away the oddly salty taste as you begin to lick, focusing just on the mid shaft, ignoring the pulsing head of his cock for as long as you can.
“put it in your mouth, come on. you gotta get it real wet.” rafe encourages you.
“for what?”
“suck me first and then you'll find out.” rafe says, guiding your head to the head of his cock.
you part your lips, placing them around the head of his cock, feeling the weight against your tongue as you suck slightly, not sure what you're supposed to be doing.
“shit- that's good. just be careful for your teeth. if you bite me, you'll regret it.”
you have no plans of biting rafe as your tongue flicks over his slit, finding the taste slightly more bearable now that you've gotten used to it.
“that's it, good girl.” rafe says, even though the only reason you take more of his cock in your mouth is his hand pushing your head down.
“cover it in spit baby, you'll be grateful when i fuck you.”
your eyes widen and you try to pull off. no way you're letting rafe fuck you and losing your virginity like this.
“oh, no you don't.” rafe warns, pushing his hips forward to bury his cock down your throat as you gag aggressively around him, more tears pooling down your cheeks.
rafe pulls you off after a moment as you sputter, coughing aggressively to get the tickle out of your throat.
“get up. im gonna fuck you now.”
“no!” you squeal. you really should know better by now. should just lay back and let rafe do whatever he wishes, but you still fight him and try to get away.
rafe tugs you up by your hair, your scalp burning as he pushes you against the daybed, warm from the sun shining down on it, comfortable and soft in sharp contrast to how rafe is treating you.
“now let's see if you got my dick wet enough for this not to hurt.” rafe makes quick and easy work of your clothing, flipping the bottom of your dress up and literally tearing away your underwear as you cry out, skin burning from the fabric.
“it'll be better for you if you relax.” rafe says, spreading your legs open for him, looking down at both your holes as your ass spreads for him, but even he isn't going to take it that far as his cock presses against your pussy.
you're not wet in the slightest, and despite the spit, it still burns as rafe pushes inside as you cry out, gripping onto the daybed, grabbing a pillow and tossing it back at rafe, who easily swats it away.
“don't piss me off or i wont give you any time to adjust.” he warns.
you manage to relax slightly, enough for rafe to push all the way inside as he sits for a moment with his cock buried in your cunt, the virginity you were planning on losing on your wedding night now ripped away from you.
“shit, you're fucking tight.” rafe moans. “next time i fuck you ill get you wet too. i bet if i lick your pussy you'll get soaked for me.”,
“you're not gonna fuck me again.” you growl out.
“i will. i own you now. your pussy is mine, baby.” rafe makes his point by pulling out then pushing his cock in with a hard, punishing thrust.
your defiant words are lost on your tongue as he moves, thrusting into you with a tight hold on your hips, keeping your ass in the air.
rafes moans and growls are loud and unafraid of the neighbors hearing, like him fucking a girl on his back patio is a regular enough occurance for them to not look.
you try to keep breathing, try to keep your cunt relaxed as his cock pushes in and out, your wetness slowly increasing from the stimulation.
“you like this, huh?” rafe smirks, hands moving to grip your ass, leaving red marks from his fingers as he squeezes at your plump flesh.
“it-it feels good.” you admit with shame, red flaring over your cheeks. no point in lying when rafe can literally feel the way your body is responding.
“and i haven't even touched your clit yet.” rafe chuckles. “you'll gush, baby.”
despite his words, rafe makes no movement for your clit. right now isn't about your pleasure as he pulls your body back onto his cock to meet his already hard thrusts.
“don't… don't cum inside of me. please.” you plead out, chest rubbing against the daybed as he moves you, nipples hard even through the multiple layers of fabric and padded bra.
“where should i cum then?”
“anywhere. my ass, my mouth-”
“ill go for mouth. but get on birth control because im gonna flood your pussy next time.” rafe continues thrusting until you feel his cock swell inside of you.
he pulls out suddenly, flipping you over onto your back. you only have a second to take a quick breath before rafe is kneeling over you, shoving his cock between your lips as his hand strokes his base.
the second your lips close around his head, he's cumming, filling your mouth with the salty taste as you swallow it down, somehow seeming more pleasing than trying to spit it all out.
“that's a good girl.” rafe pats your cheek before turning to splay out next to you on the day bed as your chest heaves, pussy feeling stretched and sensitive.
“you wanna cum?” rafe asks. “i can rub your clit.”
“i don't want you to touch me ever again.” you say, adrenaline wearing off as tears form in your eyes once again.
“i wish you wouldn't say that type of thing, baby.” rafe frowns, reaching over to wrap his strong hand around your neck. your body flails as you try to hold onto the last bit of oxygen, but ultimately you give out, vision going black.
you wake up much later. you're not sure how long, but it's been multiple hours, your throat is dry from lack of water and rafe choking you until you blacked out.
“see what happens if you misbehave?” rafe asks as your head snaps to look at him, not even realizing he was in the room.
you look down at your wrist, handcuff wrapped around it, connected to a chain, which is secured to the very bed you're sitting on.
“now.” rafe smiles wickedly, moving to the edge of the bed. “about touching your clit…”
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macabr3-barbi3 · 3 days
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dream a little dream (of me) - chapter 3
https://archiveofourown.org/works/54459367/chapters/140496796
Chapter 1 Chapter 2
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You were bound to break a term of the deal eventually, right?
we've hit chapter 3! I got a huge influx of people interested and loving this story and I finally got the inspiration and drive to bang the next chapter out for everyone 🤭 there's going to be more coming, I do as the brain commands lol
A big shoutout to @fraugwinska for being like my number 1 hype person on this fic, you are a godsend 💕
And for those who asked to be tagged when the new chapter went up! @spottypug @dennsfz @bishiglomper @ivebeenthearchersstuff
Same tags as chapter 1/2 plus a couple new ones: Dream Sex, Dreamsharing, Vaginal Sex, Cunnilingus, Rough Sex, Dreamwalking, blowjobs, 'punishment' wink wink, minor injuries, let me know if I missed anything lol
I love comments and feedback, I would love to know what you think ❤️ enjoy!
The shock on Husk’s face at seeing you inside Alastor’s room when the door flies open a few days after the camping trip is matched only by yours- the horror you’re sure is written in your expression at the pool of blood accumulating under Alastor’s body where Angel Dust is supporting him with an arm around his waist, a smoking gash across his middle.
“The fuck are you doing in here?”
“What the fuck happened?”
You speak at the same time, voices overlapping as Husk shoves the door to the room further open to make room for Angel to drag Alastor inside. He’s also coated in blood down one side, likely having been supporting Alastor’s weight from the other side to drag him up the stairs.
Alastor’s eyes are clenched shut, smile more like a grimace as he snarls at Angel Dust trying to get his feet underneath himself. “I do not need any assistance, spider, release me-”
“Sure, Smiles, tell me all about it. Ya can’t even fuckin’ stand up without ya gangly ass legs collapsin’, how else were we supposed to get ya here?” Angel has also just noticed your presence in the room as you rush over, pleased smirk taking over his features. “I fuckin’ told you there was somethin’ goin’ on with them, Husk!”
“Shut the hell up, Angel,” Husk mutters, grabbing Alastor by the ankles and helping the other demon get him to the bed, despite Alastor fighting like a wild cat the whole time. You follow closely, hovering anxiously next to the mattress. They drop him unceremoniously, causing him to hiss in pain before the wound starts gushing again. “You,” Husk says, fluffy finger pointed in your face. “You stay here with him. Make sure he doesn’t fuckin’ bleed out or anything. Angel, you go tell Charlie and Vaggie what happened. I’ll get the med kit.”
“Wait, Husk” you say as he and Angel both step away, and there’s a hard grip on your wrist from Alastor when you start to follow them. “Just one sec,” you tell the demon- a great idea, with how known he was for his patience and understanding- and pull out of his grasp, hurrying after the other two. You catch Husk at the door, Angel taking off to find Charlie. “What happened to him?”
“Got into it with Vox, what else? Those fuckin’ overlord meetings are just trouble waitin’ to happen if you ask me, never would’ve caught my ass at one of them.” He runs a frustrated hand down his face. “We couldn’t get much out of his besides that, figured it would be best to get him to his room before anyone else saw him stumblin’ around the lobby.”
“Fuck.” You glance over at him, splayed across the mattress, an arm over his eyes. “Can’t he heal on his own? I thought regeneration was all the rage down here.”
“He’s been fucked since that battle with Adam- angelic steel right to the chest, did something to his body and he doesn’t heal as quick anymore. Some stitches should get him right for at least a little while.” A dark eye watches you from Husk’s peripheral. “I don’t know what you’re doing gettin’ all buddy-buddy with him but you watch yourself. We’re not all fuckin’ stupid- somethin’s up, we saw the goddamn vampire bite on your neck after camping-”
“Are there vampires in Hell?”
“Not the goddamn point. The point is be careful and don’t fuck anyone else over in the process of whatever the hell you two’re doing.” He points back into the bedroom. “Now go stand guard or whatever you do until I can stitch him up.” Husk is off then, jogging in the opposite direction that Angel had gone. You leave the door unlocked and cracked so he can get back in when he returns and go back to Alastor’s side in the bed.
His face is sweaty, eyes still clenched shut in pain, but one of his ears perks back up when he hears you come closer. “Pay no mind to those idiots,” he mutters. “I will be perfectly fine in a matter of hours. Do not let them back in.” He waves a hand lazily, the door slamming shut with a bang.
“Yeah the smoking hole in your chest gives me a lot of confidence to that. I’m not going to stop them from helping you.” You hesitate only a second before reaching out to his shirt buttons. “Let me- you’ll need this off for Husk to stitch you up.” He’s uncharacteristically quiet as you undo the buttons and slide the shirt sideways as carefully as possible to clear some space for the cat to work. You brush against his ribs and there’s a sharp inhale, Alastor’s nostrils flaring and claws digging into the sheets.
There’s a knock at the door and when you move to go open it there’s again a hand wrapped around your wrist. “Stay,” Alastor says, looking like it pains him to say it. A strip of shadow darts across the room to open the door in your stead, Husk coming back through the frame and raising an eyebrow at the sight of you still seated beside the demon.
“Charlie and Vaggie know what happened and will check on you tomorrow. Angel went to shower. Let’s get this fuckin’ over with.” He settles on the other side of you, and Alastor releases his grip on your hand to clench them into the bedsheets as Husk starts to drag the needle through his skin.
A good bit of swear words and a loosely wrapped bandage later, Alastor is patched up and passed out on his mattress. “Where did you learn to do stitches?”
“I don’t know, not really. Winged it. Just knew he wouldn’ want anyone else to see him like he is now. Vulnerable; weak. Benefit to him to have me under his thumb, I can’t run my fuckin’ mouth or use it against him.” He eyes you. “I assume you have no problem stayin’ to monitor him? With the stitches he should be good to go by mornin’ but you’ll want to watch him through the night.”
You could revive your old sleep habits and keep awake through one evening. “Yeah, I can stay. And Husk, it’s really not what you’re thinking-”
“Don’t care. Not my business. Make sure he doesn’t die- who fuckin’ knows what happens to my soul if that happens.” Husk gathers his materials and leaves the room, making sure to close and lock the door behind him.
You wander the room for a while trying to find a way to entertain yourself. He only has a couple books in the room- ones you’ve already read before- and despite your interest in the bayou dimension you don’t want to wander too far away from him. Eventually you pick a book and drag the armchair over to the bed, settling in and keeping an eye on the movements of his chest. He seems to be doing well, despite being weak and injured, no blood yet seeping through the bandages on his chest.
You do so well for a while without getting tired before the siren song of sleep starts to pull at your eyelids. You combat it as best you can- you pace the room, do push ups and jumping jacks, try counting backwards from one thousand. It doesn’t help, and you find yourself curled up in the armchair next to the bed, eyes drifting shut and not opening again.
When the world of Alastor’s dreams comes to fruition, you’re once again just in his bedroom, the only difference being a slightly darker tone to the light. His eyebrows raise when he sees you. “Well! Fancy meeting you here, darling.”
“I’m sorry, I was trying to stay awake out there to keep an eye on you-”
He waves you down. “No worries, dear. I told you before the stitches that I would be fine, that remains true. I cannot fault you for falling asleep on duty when you’ve not been accustomed to staying awake during the evenings any longer.”
A sigh of relief. “Thank goodness. I was-”
“Ah ah ah,” he interrupts, and with a shifting shadow he stands before you, trailing a finger down your throat. “That is not to say that I’m not upset with you for something else.” He circles you, eyes lidded and smile teasing. “Need I remind you again of the terms of our deal?”
“What?” Something slips around your wrist, almost like the feeling of Alastor’s fingers but softer, and you glance down to see one of his shadows. His meaning dawns on you. “Wait, Alastor, I didn’t- I’m not here on purpose, I-”
“Ahhh but that wasn’t a condition, was it? It is only allowed with my permission , dear, and I must say I can’t recall giving that to you!” Another shadow wraps itself around your thighs, buckling your legs and bringing you to your knees; he runs a hand gently along the top of your head, tipping your head up to meet his gaze. “I’m afraid discipline is in order.” With a wave of his finger Alastor’s armchair is behind him, settling into it as his tentacles make themselves at home across your body, holding you in place where you now sit on your knees, Alastor’s hand still cupped under your chin. “I think a spanking will do.”
Your body jerks where you’re held. “I’m not a child.”
“This may seem a bit tame,” he admits, expression pensive, “but sometimes the classics can be rather effective! Here’s the plan-” The tentacles shift, bending you at the waist so your chin rests nearly on Alastor’s knee. “You’ve done rather well so far so I won’t be cruel . I think ten strikes should be sufficient. You’ll count them aloud, and should you miss one we will start over. How does that sound fair?”
“Alastor-”
The first strike is over your clothing, Alastor cocking his head when you try to move away from the faint sting of it. “Surely you know how to count, dearest.” Your clothes seem to melt off your body, goosebumps erupting on your skin at the chill in the air. When you don’t respond he sighs, his smile almost condescending. “Oh well; I suppose it can’t be helped. We begin again.”
The tentacle strikes again, a sharp snap that has you hissing through your teeth. Not knowing what else you can do, you decide to just submit- how bad can ten simple swats with a tentacle really hurt? “One,” you mutter, and Alastor’s eyes light up now that you’re willing to play his game.
He cups his hand around the back of your head, and you tilt into his palm. “Perfect. Good girl. Go ahead.”
A gentle whoosh through the air, and another blow to the soft skin of your ass. “T- two,” you say, gritting your teeth against the vague ache. It’s not terribly painful; it’s more the humiliation of it than anything else, but not being able to see it coming contributes to the sting. “Fuck!” Another that you didn’t anticipate. “Three.”
Alastor uses the light pressure of his hand to tilt your head to meet his eyes. “Perhaps I’m just old fashioned,” he says softly, “but I don’t believe ‘fuck’ is a number. Start again.”
You feel the sting of frustrated tears. “Alastor, please.”
He brushes them away with a claw. “Come now, darling, no need for that. You can count to ten, can’t you? Why, it’s easy as can be and then we can be done with this business.”
So he makes you start again- and now for a third time when you can’t stop the whine in your throat from distorting the ‘eight’ into a broken groan. The spanks hadn’t been really painful before but as the punishment continued and the same spots were struck over and over you had become sore, and every new blow stung and ached like nothing else.
And yet- maybe its the position, or the utter helplessness of what’s happening with Alastor in control but there’s that familiar burn in your core, slick arousal from your cunt slipping down your thighs and out of sight of the demon before you.
Your eyes had drifted closed at some point, neck eventually losing the strength to hold itself up and pressing into the fabric of Alastor’s trousers. When he makes a curious humming noise you let your lashes flutter back open. His eyes are dark, pupils blown and his smile dangerous as he looks down at you with lidded eyes. “You know, if you’re having such trouble counting I may have a better use for that lovely mouth of yours, darling.” A brief respite from the tentacles, at least, as he repositions you with his hands to bring your face to the erection that’s grown in his lap. “This isn’t my punishment, after all; I don’t see why I should have to suffer now. How’s this- I’ll count for you, and you keep your mouth otherwise occupied, hm?”
You don’t bother trying to speak, instead just nodding in his gentle hold. He smiles, a little softer then, another quietly uttered “good girl” before he’s undoing his pants and pulling his cock out, presenting it to you and slowly guiding it into your waiting mouth.
He’s not demanding about it, lets you take your time in getting your lips wrapped around the head, fingers brushing delicately through your hair. The position isn’t perfect, and not having use of your hands is a bit of a nuisance but you can move your head enough to take some of his length into the warm, wet cavern of your mouth. You swipe your tongue along what you can reach of the underside of him and he hisses above you, pulling you back with a soft fisting of your hair until you can only reach the tip.
“We’ll continue now, my dear. Be mindful of your teeth, please.” And he slides back in with a simultaneous strike of one of the tentacles. “One.”
Somehow the childish punishment is easier to take with Alastor’s cock in your mouth. You still jerk in the hold of the tentacles when you’re hit, but your whimpers and cries of pain are muffled, the vibrations of it serving a greater purpose now in bringing Alastor pleasure. You make it to seven before a particular hard spank jolts you forward, prick shoving harder into your mouth and hitting the back of your throat. The constriction that happens when you inadvertently gag a bit makes a harsh moan tumble out of Alastor’s mouth, his fingers tightening their grip in your hair. “Fuck-”
You pull off enough to speak, lips brushing the tip as you do. “Thought ‘fuck’ wasn’t a number.”
“Wretched, delightful thing,” he murmurs, brushing his thumb against your cheek. “You raise a valid point, but I think we’ve drawn this out long enough- you’ve learned your lesson?” A nod from you, lips once again covering him and tongue swirling around the head. “Lovely,” he sighs. “Then we’ll make this last bit quick.”
He shifts forward in the armchair, enough that he’s now fully inside of your mouth and each lazy thrust of his hips bumps the back of your throat. He gives himself time to savor the feeling of you sucking and licking at him, throat constricting each time he bottoms out, in between swats from the tentacles. “Eight. Nine. Ten.” Your hands are released from their restraints, and rather than bringing them to your throbbing clit like you desperately want to, cunt drenched and ready for something more, you instead bring them to Alastor’s lap, repositioning yourself to better choke on his length. You let your teary eyes drift up to his face, his eyes lidded where he stares down at you, smile tight and tense. “Wonderfully done, sweetheart. I need only a moment more- may I?” He fists his hands in your hair on either side of your head and you let your mouth go slack, allowing him to thrust in and back out at his own leisure.
You can feel under your hands the flexing of the muscles in his forearm and wish that he would take off his goddamn shirt- get undressed in one of these dreams, just something so you weren’t the only one exposed and vulnerable.
“Magic in dreams doesn’t count, I rather think; it seems that you can do it as well.”
You think about what Alastor had said while camping- how your pants had simply vanished with a thought, the mere desire. You’d never really tried much with your dream powers. You just showed up and tried not to be spotted whenever you were in one, or got the information you were looking for and left. It hadn’t occurred to you until Alastor had said something that you might be able to do more , to use the power for something else.
So while Alastor grows more desperate in his race to completion, fucking your mouth with renewed fervor, you concentrate on the buttons of his shirt. You don’t want to alert him to what you’re trying to do- he’d probably take offense to the fact that you aren’t as wholly engrossed in letting him use your mouth as he likes, might even start the whole punishment over again after he came. So you let your vocal chords do as they please while he ruts into the hole you’ve provided for him, soft moans and whimpers to distract him a bit.
The top button twists, and slowly, silently, pulls itself from the hole it was fastened into. A slight shift of your eyes and the second one follows.
The mere possibilities of what you could do with this information makes you moan, long and low and vibrating hard around Alastor’s cock. Already close, the sensation makes him buck his hips hard, spewing curses as he spends himself in the warm and wet heat of your mouth. You’ve hardly had a chance to swallow- the taste and feeling not awful but just a little strange- before he’s yanking you up from the floor, pulling you into his lap and crushing his lips to yours. His hands come to rest on your thighs, traveling slowly upwards until he meets the welts that his tentacles have left on your skin. You hiss into his mouth at the sting of it, and he kisses you gently while massaging the sensitive skin. You distract yourself with popping another button on his shirt, a motion that goes unnoticed by Alastor in favor of switching between kissing you and watching your face while he touches you.
The rush of it eventually slows and stops, content to just sit there together for a bit with him unaware of the 6 buttons you had managed to get undone. Unlike the other times you’ve met in his dreams you aren’t simply shoved out this time- Alastor wakes up slowly and groggily, like anyone else would, and you open your eyes at the same time. He spots you in the armchair and moves to the side, clearing up a space beside him. “Come over here, dear,” he says, and you’re helpless to disobey. 
Sitting up in the armchair you become aware of two things- that the welts and likely bruises from the tentacles had carried over into real life, as did the slick arousal and throbbing need in your cunt, suddenly desperate to be filled with Alastor- not just in a dream but here, now.
You stand from the chair and to the demon’s surprise, slip your bottoms and panties off before climbing into the bed and settling yourself against his side. He turns to face you, face twisting in slight pain when the wound on his chest shifts, but he trails his fingers down the slope of your neck, over the curve of your hip, finally dipping between your legs and feeling how wet you’ve become from allowing him to be in control of you. “We may have to find a new punishment for you, dearest, if this is how you react to this method.”
“Please, Alastor,” you say, reaching a hand down to his lap and pleased to find that while he’s been spent in the dream, his erection here in the real world is eager to go again. You slip your fingers under the band of his trousers, circle them around his cock with a light squeeze. “Please, I need it- not in the dream but here, real . Please?”
His breath catches in his throat, hot exhale against your face. “I- I am injured, darling, I cannot perform as I do in my mind-”
“You don’t have to.” You’re already shifting, getting up on your knees and settling over his lap, slotting his hard, hot length against your dripping folds. “I’ll do it- you don’t have to do anything. I- I just need to cum, please?”
He cups your face in his hand like he had in the dream. “How could I possibly deny you anything?” He assists you in positioning yourself on his cock, a soft “careful, dear” as you start to sink down.
Jesus fuck. The dreams had done nothing to prepare you for the feeling in real life as you’re speared on his cock, your body making room for him with the delicious slide down until you’re seated in his lap completely. You’re full of him in every sense; your cunt stuffed, mind racing with thoughts of Alastor, vision blocked by anything but the sight of his eyes wide as he watches you take him in, his claws digging into the skin of your hips. It’s so, so much better than it is in the dreams- it’s tangible , a real memory that you can hold onto from your mind, not remnants of something in Alastor’s head. This was yours. Something he’s giving you because you asked for it, begged him for it and he obliged.
You raise up on your knees, already shaky from the slow descent, and make it halfway before Alastor shifts his hips and hits the bundle of nerves inside you. You bite back the moan that wants to escape, glaring at him halfheartedly. “I said I would do it.”
“You’re certainly taking your time, darling. Just thought I could offer some assistance.” He gives you a positively lecherous smile. “I suppose if you won’t allow me to move this should suffice.” He lets one hand slide off your hip to rub at your clit with his thumb, the other tightening its grip on you.
“I’ll- I’ll allow it,” you choke out, a little miffed that the subtle shift of his hips was enough to get him right where you needed him. You ride him gently, mindful of his injury, and the pleasure crests, so close to breaking you that your legs are cramping. “God, Alastor, please-”
“What do you need, beautiful?” You have only a moment to process the word before he’s moving, an arm wrapping around your middle and turning the pair of you over, rutting his cock into you with a speed and pressure that makes you dizzy. His smile is dazed looking down at you, watching your cunt swallow him and reveling in the wet noises that emerge from where you’re joined. “You’re so close, darling, I can feel it- your pleasure is mine. Every time you reach that peak, when you cum on my cock, it will only ever be me. ”
He shifts again, brings his knees up closer to get deeper inside of you. “Fuck, Alastor, my god-”
“I like the sound of that,” he purrs, bending down to trail his tongue up your throat. “I want to be everything to you. Would you allow me that privilege? To claim you, to own you in every way that you’d let me, in any dimension.”
Your head whips back and forth on the pillow, the edge so close your vision is dark. “Please, please, please,” you’re mumbling, “Alastor please, I’m gonna-”
The tension snaps before you can finish your sentence, a wailing cry falling from your lips as you clench and shake and cum under him, around him. It’s so different from when it happens in Alastor’s dreams- it echoes in every part of your body, your head spinning and fingers tightening in his shirt so hard that you fear you’ll rip the fabric. His name spills from you in waves with your release, and his eyes are dark as his thrusts intensify, chasing his orgasm with the resolve of a man possessed.
“Yours, all yours,” you mumble against his lips when his face comes close enough to catch his mouth. “All of me.”
He snarls and his hips stutter, snapping hard against yours. “So much- so much better,” he gasps through the tightening of your pussy on his length. “So perfect- mine -” With a harsh growl he spends himself a second time for the night, into the wet silken grip of your body. He thrusts gently through the wave of it before he collapses in a heap against you, breathing heavily into your ear.
“You’re so- lovely,” he mumbles. “Giving, for a demon. One would think that you would simply take- I would, were it me with your powers. But you’re just…” He trails off, head against your shoulder and breath slow. 
You bring a hand up to trail down his back. “I meant it,” you whisper, swallowing your nerves. “If you- if you would have me, I would be yours. For as long as you want. Forever.”
He remains silent.
Fuck. You hope you haven’t overstepped some boundary. “Alastor?” He doesn’t move, or show any indication that he’s heard you. “Hey, are you okay?” You push at his shoulder with no response, so you double down and push harder, tumbling him off of you.
“Mother fucker.” The bandages wrapped around his chest are stained with red, more than when you had begun- the demon had torn his stitches open when he flipped the pair of you around to take control back, after you specifically told him you would handle your orgasms yourself. “Idiot,” you hiss at his slacken face, but you still brush his hair back from his sweaty forehead before pulling your bottoms back on and rushing down the hall to find Husk, ignoring the sting of the welts on your rear the whole way.
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poguesprincess · 19 hours
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please more teasing bff!jj i’m so down bad for him. wanna give him a lap dance and watch his face get all red🤩
luckily for you teasing bff!jj (or any jj) is my brand! i kinda strayed away from the ask a bit but hopefully the point still stands.. here you go sweetheart <3
♱ ‧₊˚ jj maybank is your best friend.
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you remind yourself this as you stare at him from across the crowded room. what he’s brought you to doesn’t necessarily constitute as a party, but it’s certainly too large of a crowd to be considered a small gathering. whatever it is, there’s some faint music, drinks, chatter.
he was your best friend, and maybe it was the 2 or 3 odd beers you’d had already, but he looked, for a lack of better words, yummy. like one of your usual boytoys you’d seduce on a night like this. still slightly upset with him from whatever bickering argument the two of you shared in the car before, it also beckoned you to have some fun with him. rile him up. again, the drinks were talking.
which is why you slam down the half empty bottle in your hand on the counter, its contents splashing over your fingers and onto those of whatever boy had been talking your ear off the majority of the night, storming off and away from him without a word. jj catches a glimpse of you, and his focus drifts away from his own conversation. he’s your best friend. you try to remember this.
but, the closer you get, the more it slips your mind, and the more the drinks whisper how good he looks.
“i want to dance.”
“what happened to princess over there?” he points to the boy you were with before, and you not that you now have two men very clearly still annoyed with you.
“not good enough.” his face is full of protest, but he lets you lead him outside anyways, where the music is louder, the crowd is fuller, the consequences are duller. the two of you dance, but it isn’t enough. slipping from under his arm, you hold his hand in yours, back facing him, and your hips sway faster. jj maybank was an easy boy. a boy like other boys. you knew how to get back at him.
he’s hardly paying attention to you until he realizes the gap between you two is closing, his face pinking up at the proximity. jj never really knew how to deal with having a really, really hot best friend. he tried his best to ignore it. but it didn’t change the fact that he was painstakingly attracted to you, and that the girl he’d sworn himself off of was now slowly grinding her ass onto his crotch. chill, he told himself. just chill.
“the fuck are you doing?” are you trying to get me to fuck you?
“dancing?” you bring his hand down and rest it on your hip, encouraging him to take the lead (you knew he couldn’t). you could feel how tense he was, blue eyes boring down between the space where your hips roll against him. you can hear him utter a small fuck, hands shaky as he tries to keep his cool. you turn, and it takes everything in you not to laugh in his red hot face.
“jesus, maybank, is this how you get every time a girl tries to dance with you?” he’s sputtering, too focused on trying to seem normal— collected, in the public space, feet fumbling as he tries to hide his nervousness with his dancing. you’ve never seen him like this before. the thread snaps when you bend over slightly, hands on your knees, and you feel his strong arm grip yours painfully, practically dragging you as he makes his way back to his truck. you struggle to contain your laughter. he’s still red in the face when you turn to look at him, still spilling over his words as he tries to curse you out.
“think you’re funny, huh. real comedian over here.”
“oh, jay, you should see your face!” you’re doubled over at this point, clutching to his bicep, and he’s desperately trying to shove you into the car. “just get in!” he’s frantic, and you assume it’s because he’s embarrassed, but you can’t see the imprint of his hard cock in his jeans if you’re too busy giggling in his truck, rather than in his arms.
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rjchocobi · 13 hours
Text
﹙🍃 𓂃 satan's right-hand man — lee haechan ! ﹚
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♡ . . . synopsis ; you've known lee donghyuck your whole life, admired him from afar for half as long and yet, why does it take a cross-major project to get you to properly interact?
♡ . . . pairing ; computer science major! haechan × multimedia major! reader
♡ . . . genre ; non-idol au, college au (? very inaccurate portrayal of the education system haha). a few curses flying here and there.
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“I don't think I can do it. There's way too many people around.”
You follow the tan-skinned target dressed in baggy jeans and a varsity jacket as he walks past your table, out of the cafeteria billowing murmurs of conversation. His brown hair flops down on his eyes, wired earphones making him oblivious to the world.
Or, in this case, you and your friend's schemes.
“Y/n, just breathe,” Gyuri chuckles, typing away on her laptop. “Most people here are too occupied with their own shit to care about yours.”
“Astounding analogy, truly,” you deadpan at the Literature major who shrugs, leaning back on the chair. The crop top you'd worn was sticking to your sweating back, uncomfortably so. “And sure, nobody would be curious as to why I'm walking up to the newly appointed captain of the soccer team. The last time someone asked him out, they went viral!”
“Hey, you're asking him out for an entirely different reason. Unless, you have a thing for bratty jocks with pretty faces?”
You couldn't stop the roll of your eyes. She was right, until you account for his soft brown eyes, tech nerd tendencies that came off as way too appealing than they had any business being and a presence that everyone heard yet missed when he wasn't around.
Oh god, you really were hopeless.
Gyuri pipes up next, looking away from the screen before her, “Also, it takes about five minutes to make it to the front gate. So, unless you have any other place in mind to ask him before the first game tomorrow, you should be running.”
The world screeches to a halt. Your eyes flicker to the wall clock, as you stand up immediately. “Shit, there's no way I'll make it to him before his usual bus leaves in these shoes!”
“Should I be concerned that you know his bus route?” Gyuri raises an inquisitive brow.
You muster your deadliest glare, grabbing for things and shoving them in your bag. “Don't make it sound creepy, weirdo. I used to take the same bus before we moved.”
“Eh, tomato to-mah-to,” Gyuri cocks her head. “Now, chop chop. You have precisely two minutes on the clock.”
Taking a deep breath, you try (and fail, evidently) to settle your stomach which had been dancing the tango on a loop for the whole day. “I'll see you later. And thanks for the coffee!”
Gyuri throws you double thumbs up. Whether in acceptance or encouragement, you don't have the time to figure out.
When you manage to stumble through the crowd going the opposite way, past the gates of your college campus and to the nearest bus stop, it's been nearly ten minutes. With your heart pounding against your throat, you scan the listing on your phone, “Let's see... Cheongpa 2GA, Cheongpa...”
“It got cancelled today. There was a big crash by the Hangang road.”
Your head shoots up at the distantly familiar voice, so fast that you're surprised you dodge a whiplash. He stands leaning against the pole upholding the overhead shade, a small smile on his face.
Inhaling sharply, you nod and speak after having reinstalled basic social skills. “Right. Uh, are there any other buses going the same way?”
“Not if you want to reach home past ten,” he muses. “I'll catch the next ride to the subway and take the train.”
The need to know why he was telling you this registered a little too late.
"Shouldn't you be looking for the Bogwang side buses, though?” he asks.
You nearly trip on the transition curb, going to stand beside him. “I'm visiting family in Cheongpa. Anyway, it's kind of weird that you know where I live, isn't it?”
He's still staring you down as he says, “Not as weird as you and your friend memorizing my schedules or tracking my hourly whereabouts.”
For the second time in the span of five minutes, you look up at him, finding the corners of his warm gaze crinkling with mirth. You feel your mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. “I—”
One syllable doesn't make it out your mouth before he's humming in approval. About what, you're none the wiser. “Yeah, you guys are not as quiet as you may think.”
Humiliation burns red across the apples of your cheeks and creeps up your neck. If Lee Donghyuck had managed to overhear, how many other within earshot knew all about your business?
You settled for an indignant response. “Hey, it's rude to eavesdrop.”
Donghyuck chuckles, an airy sound but still low; lower than the pitches you know his laughter reached. “Or I just have really great hearing. So, what is it you wanted to ask me so badly?”
You catch up on the teasing lilt. “What if I say it's a love confession?”
Your flippant reply has him lose his cool for half a second yet you still consider it a win. He shoves his phone back in his pocket, “Doubt it. Setting aside the massive stroking my ego will receive, you don't seem like the type to lose your mind over asking someone out.”
“Touché,” You mumble, your next words put on hold due to the people near your surging forward as the next bus arrived.
Donghyuck walks forward, so at ease you think he had taken and discarded your conversation in the matter of seconds. Before your heart could drop to the depths of hell, he looks over in confusion. “You’re not coming?”
You follow him wordlessly, hanging around the back of the bus. Donghyuck stands near you, chuckling when he sees you're unable to hold onto the handlebars above.
“Too high for you?”
“Shut up before I stomp on your feet. I can assure you it hurts like a bitch,” you threaten and he thinks you look about as menacing as a kitten.
“Enlighten me then, Y/n. What made you stalk me on a Tuesday?” he asks instead, moving a little closer as the bus lurches forward.
Ignoring the zoo of butterflies in your gut, you sigh. “Remember the project that's supposed to be thirty percent of the semester's final grade? Well, my assignment goes way off my area of expertise."
He hums in acknowledgement, full lips parting in an 'o' of realization as he catches on. "And what do you expect me to do?"
Ever the overthinker, you translate that to him wanting nothing to do with this. You drop your head, eyes trained on the yellow wedges you'd put on for the day. It had given you nothing but blisters. That's what trying new things, going out of comfort zones get you—a reality check.
You voice is too small for your liking, "I was thinking of making a videogame. Nothing fancy, just the barebones of an interactive interface. I thought if I get a computer major on board, we could both submit the project and present different aspects of the process."
The split second of silence before he speaks is gut-wrenching. “Killing two birds with one stone. It's a smart idea.”
You glance up to see a leisurely grin on his face. Is it weird that the loosest definition of a compliment from him is throwing you into a spiral? Probably.
“So? Will you work on it with me?” you ask, all too eager.
He pretends to think it over, hand on his chin and everything. Then, “Say 'please' first.”
For a second, you're rendered speechless. “What?"
“What?” He blinks owlishly, parroting you. “If a cute girl asks nicely, maybe I'll agree.”
Your jaw slackens. “Lee Donghyuck, you are a menace to society.”
“Because I ask for my fair share? I see how it is.” He pouts mockingly, running a hand through his fluffy hair.
“You get to present the project, too! That's a fifty-fifty bargain unless you have a better idea for partner-work that assures you an easy A,” you cross your arms over your chest. You may be a hopeless case of anxiety and lackluster connections but you're not that desperate. And who does he think he is, anyway?
Donghyuck chuckles, head bobbing. “Not nearly enough. If I'm doing this, I want you to do two things for me.”
You nearly rethink your decision for even asking him in the first place. But acting like his personal errand girl is not worse than showing up to class with a half-assed project. “Nothing that entails me publicly making a fool out of myself more than I already do.”
He holds his hands up in surrender. “I won't ask for anything like that. Who do you take me for?”
You eye him up and down. “Right now? Satan's right-hand man.”
Donghyuck smirks, poking his tongue onto the inside of his cheek. “Alright, then. Satan's right-hand man says you must first ask him politely and second... go out on a date with him.”
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hoonieshoney · 2 days
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Y/n telling hee that her dad wants to actually meet him but he gets horny in the middle of dinner and drags y/n to the bathroom in secret 🥰
Thank you for the fantastic idea nonnie! [lemme give your brain a smooch 😗] ❤️ I think this is definitely canon in the “I Beg, Save Me” universe. This would take place after, and it’s Heeseungs first time having dinner with readers family (he’s already met them, but this would be his first time in a one on one intimate setting with her parents)
Remember, this fic is dark content based so keep that in mind for this drabble! He’s a manipulative asshole, but we love him lol If you haven’t read it, READ HERE
Let me also take the time to dedicate this small drabble to my fellow writer @rinbowaman , wrote this special just for you, my love ❤️😏
MDNI 18+🛑DarkishContentWarning🛑SMUT🛑
Not proofread, just a small smutty drabble, enjoy ducklings
Sitting at the dinner table, Heeseung can’t help but admire how adorable you look in this setting. A cute cardigan, a long skirt, your pretty barefaced skin glowing, his sweet innocent girl. Laughing with your parents, serving him his dinner plate, refilling his water glass, it was clear your parents raised you with old fashioned gender roles..and he fucking loved it.
Only making his cock throb uncontrollably at the thought of you being his obedient little housewife.
While you are in the middle of talking about the next church food drive you suddenly feel a warm hand on your upper thigh.
“You okay, dear?” Your mom asks seeing your panicked expression.
“Yeah, just a small tummy ache,” you lie. Heeseung smirks and continues to rub his hand on your thigh inching closer and closer to your heat.
“What are you doing?” You whisper to him while your parents are distracted.
“Go to the bathroom and wait for me.”
You furrow your eyebrows, “Heeseung..I can’t do-“
“That wasn’t a fucking question, angel. Just do it.” He gives you a warning look, keeping his voice low so your parents wouldn’t hear.
You nod and excuse yourself quietly. You wait a few minutes before the bathroom door opens.
“Why did you-“
He shuts you up with a forceful kiss slipping his tongue into your mouth. Gripping your hips harshly he lifts you up and slams you down on the bathroom counter sink causing you to gasp at the sudden force.
“Shh, angel. Can’t let your parents hear what I’m about to do to their sweet daughter.” He smirks while lifting your long skirt.
“Fuck angel..you soaked right through these cute little panties, is that all for me?”
You whine feeling his fingers press on your dampened crotch.
“Aw angel, what’s wrong? Can’t tell daddy what you want?”
He watches your body shudder and your eyes widen, oh, my sweet innocent girl has a daddy kink.
Slipping the wet fabric down your legs he grabs your throat and forces your nose against his staring deep into your watery eyes.
“When daddy asks you something you answer, angel.”
“S-sorry..”
“Sorry what, angel?” He smiles, perfect teeth on display and a hint of darkness twinkles in his eyes.
“Sorry..daddy..”
He hums, “good girl.”
Unzipping his jeans he releases his aching cock from its restraints and spreads his precum around the swollen tip.
“We don’t have a lot of time, angel, so I can’t prep you, but daddy knows you’ll be a good girl and take it, right?”
“Y-yes daddy…”
He smirks and starts to ease himself inside of you. Your body shudders as you try to move away from the painful intrusion, but he keeps a firm grip on your waist as he stretches you around his cock.
Tears start to fall from your doe eyes and a small pained whine escapes your lips. He moves his hand from your throat and slaps it against your mouth to silence you. As much as he loves to hear your sounds, he can’t risk getting caught by your parents.
He stops after two inches, your tightness becomes too much around him. You were squeezing him too tight, trying to push him out. He’s not going anywhere. He steadies himself again and shoves past the resistance you’re giving him and you squeal behind his hand. He was too big to take without proper prep, he didn’t care, he needed to cum.
You whine as he gets deeper inside of you and the tears stream down your cheeks, only making him smirk. You close your eyes as he snaps his hips to yours, jerking your body harshly against the bathroom mirror.
“You feel so good around me angel, you look so pretty fucked out like this for daddy..”
He grunts feeling you clench tighter around him at his words, dirty fucking girl.
He rutted into you faster, hitting that spot inside of you, “open your eyes and look at me angel..”
You open your wet eyes and look into his dark ones. Sweat adorned his hairline, his eyes hooded, a sinister smirk on his perfect lips. He was so devilishly handsome..
“I want you to look at me when you cum on daddy’s cock.”
You mewl against his hand and let the heat crash over you. Clamping down on his cock, you arch into him and cum. Your vision gets spotty while your head lulled against the mirror “Good girl.”
He didn’t give you anytime to breathe as he fucked into faster having your legs shake uncontrollably around him. He murmured out a string of curses before stilling and letting his cum shoot inside of you painting your womb in white and warmth.
He stays inside for a minute before removing his hand from your mouth and pecking your parted lips. He pulls out watching the creamy mixed mess leak onto the bathroom counter.
“Bad girl wasting daddy’s gift like that..better go tell your parents bye angel. Daddy’s going to have to teach you a lesson for being ungrateful..”
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barnesafterglow · 2 days
Text
night shift
summary: your growing fame becomes too much for bucky
pairing: actor!bucky barnes x singer!reader
word count: 2k
warnings: fame au, dual pov, unreliable narrators, idk how the grammys work (clearly), angst angst angst, steve is a good friend, bucky is Going Thru It, if you think this is joe + taylor coded you're prob right, directly inspired by night shift by lucy dacus
a/n: yearly fic, dedicated to new lovers
masterlist - i no longer have a tag list but you can follow @theafterglowlibrary to get updates! 🤍
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You shoved him off of you, heart racing, breaths coming fast. You had said Bucky’s name, had whispered it in your most intimate moment, and now you needed to leave.
You said nothing else, gathering up your clothes and pulling them on as quickly as you could.
“Wha-”
The door slammed behind you, cold winter winds whipping around you as you realized you’d left your jacket on the hook by the door. It was your favorite, but one you were okay sacrificing as long as you didn’t have to face your embarrassment anymore.
Huffing a breath you could see in front of your face, you called an Uber - at least you had remembered your phone - and paced anxiously a block away from his building, hoping and praying he wouldn’t follow you out.
The entire ride home your mind spiraled until you turned off your phone, terrified this would make headlines already and, let’s be honest, no one would be surprised if it did. You hated that was the life you lived. As if your breakup with Bucky hadn’t already been tabloid fodder for weeks now, the public speculating every detail and warping every comment and photo posted. You had taken to keeping off social media altogether in the time since, trying to disguise your outings as much as possible and take back alleys to recordings and friends’ houses.
Your biggest supporter through all of this, surprisingly, had been Steve - Bucky’s best friend. He hadn’t been your friend first, sure, but he had become like a brother to you nonetheless, and he knew the situation better than anyone. You knew he still talked to Bucky just the same and, while that stung a little, you couldn’t fault him for being there for his childhood best friend too.
Which is how you ended up outside his apartment the very next morning, clad in your typical-as-of-late attire of a hoodie and a hat and sunglasses. It was also how you came face to face with Bucky for the first time since that fateful night.
“I didn’t come to sit here and watch you stare at your feet, James.” You stood from his couch, starting to seethe with pent up anger from your gradually failing relationship, all to end up here. What did he want? To absolve his guilt and shake hands and everything would be fine?
No. You had been the victim of his petty remarks and anxious jealousy for so long. You wouldn’t let him think he deserved your time when he didn’t respect the person you had become. 
Your anger flashed back to the week before, the last time you had been seen out in public together as he was breaking up with you at your favorite coffee shop, where he had paid for your drink and you gave him a hesitant kiss, even though you knew it was inevitably coming. He had led you to a table in the corner and proceeded to tell you that he was sorry but he couldn’t do this anymore, it was too much for him - you were too much for him. Okay. That’s all you said was “okay” before you pushed out of the chair and walked around the city until the sun went down.
By the time you got home that night, the headlines were already speculating your breakup, though neither of you had yet to shed a single tear.
-
Bucky blinked as you shuffled on Steve’s doorstep, eyes wide and contemplating the quickest escape. He didn’t blame you.
He had admittedly not handled your breakup the best; in fact, he regretted it almost immediately at the stricken look on your face, clearly not expecting it. He didn’t blame you for that, either, seeing as it had slipped out in a moment of panic.
You had gained a lot of fame over the course of your relationship, even more than him, and he didn’t quite know how to cope with it. And so the words had poured out, unable to be taken back, and here you were, weeks later, still at odds.
He thought every night of how to make it up to you. Public displays weren’t your thing and you had blocked his number the night of your big fight, so that was out of the question, and he didn’t fancy showing up to your house only to have the door slammed in his face either.
But now, now maybe that you were here on the most neutral ground you could stand on, maybe he could keep his foot out of his mouth and apologize. Words stirred in his hindsight, unable to string together a coherent sentence as your face morphed through the stages of grief in record time. Then, just as he was about to speak, Steve placed a hand on his shoulder and gently guided him back into the house. Relief flooded your face as you drifted out of his sight, and he realized this probably wasn’t going to be as easy to take back as he thought.
“Buck,” Steve said as the two of them turned around the corner. “You need to leave.”
Bucky felt his face do something awful, a mixture of confusion and guilt, but he decided to keep his mouth shut. He simply nodded and kept his head down as he shrugged on his jacket and passed by you in the doorway.
He could hear the soft sound of your sobs as the front door clicked shut.
-
Songwriting could be as easy as breathing and as hard as climbing a mountain. Right now, the words flooded out of you like a tap of water.
And so did the tears, staining your notebook paper and smearing ink, but still in your heart you knew you would never forget these lyrics - these words that so painstakingly came from your soul and laid it bare.
As you finished the last verse, you took a deep breath, sucked up the tears, and called Natasha. 
-
“Steve, I need to talk to her,” Bucky whined over a beer in a rundown bar in Brooklyn.
“No, you don’t.”
“I can fix it, I know I can.”
“I don’t think you can, Buck.” Steve ran a hand through his hair, a deep sigh leaving his lips. “She’s trying to move on. Don’t ruin that for her.”
“But-”
“No.”
Bucky mimicked Steve’s sigh and leaned back in his chair. It had been increasingly hard to justify his decision to end things with you. He didn’t know what he was thinking and he regretted every moment of it since then. 
“Do you think she misses me?” Bucky looked so hopeful, but he could see the sorrow in Steve’s eyes.
“I don’t know.”
-
The Grammys, the fucking Grammys, and you were performing. You were nominated for a couple, and the Academy had asked you to sing - preferably a new song - in honor of that.
Natasha wrapped you in a hug, twirled you around, and announced you were going out to celebrate. You hesitantly said yes, knowing the press would be everywhere and there was always the possibility of seeing Bucky.
But fuck him. This was your moment.
Which is how you ended up at your favorite dive bar in Brooklyn. Your first mistake.
It was your favorite because Bucky had taken you there so many times. But you couldn’t think of another place you would celebrate than the place where so much inspiration and so many lyrics had come from.
You didn’t scan the room as you walked in with your hand clutching Nat’s, the rest of your small circle of friends following close behind. Your second mistake.
Walking straight to the bar, you didn’t notice Bucky in the far corner, watching your every move. It wasn’t until you were a few drinks in, feeling the celebration kick in, that you spotted him.
At first, you intended to ignore him. This was your time, your night, your moment. He didn’t get the spoil that.
That is, until you went to the bathroom and he trailed you into the dimly lit hallway.
“Baby,” he whispered, his voice a harsh rasp of beer and no sleep. “I’ve missed you.”
Your heart stopped beating in your chest.
You weren’t prepared to see him tonight, not that you ever were these days. But tonight of all nights, the one that should have been carefree and fun and a glittery memory for years to come, was smeared with anger and heartbreak as you spun to face him.
“What the fuck,” you snapped as his fingers grazed your bare arm. Immediately you felt bad, seeing the hurt on his face, and your expression softened. “Sorry.”
“I-it’s okay.” The catch in his voice broke your heart, your own watery eyes matching his. For just a moment.
It took you too long to come to your senses - this was the man who had shattered your heart without a second thought - but he was already so close to you. His body only inches from your own, his hot breath fanning your face, and goddamnit you missed him. You missed him so much that your heart broke all over again.
Your mind cycled through a thousand different thoughts all at once: get away, come closer, touch me, keep your hands off. You couldn’t decide what you wanted in the moment.
You were so, so angry, and yet you couldn’t stop yourself from reaching out to him. His hands settled on your waist as the lights overhead flickered. Your hand pressed gently to his cheek, completely of its own volition. Suddenly, you were tracing the planes of the face you had once known so well. He looked older now, like your time apart had aged him, yet his was still as handsome as the day you had first laid eyes on him.
His eyes locked with yours, and neither of you said a word - not him to ask, not you to stop him - as he leaned in to kiss you.
-
It should have felt like a victory - it did feel like a victory - but there was something else there. Something dark and twisted and Bucky couldn’t figure out if it was coming from you or him.
The kiss could have lasted moments or a lifetime, he didn’t really know. All he knew was one second you were holding him close to you and the next you were shoving him off.
“Fuck fuck fuck,” your voice came out in a whisper, like you didn’t want to draw attention from the steadily growing crowd of the bar. He supposed you didn’t.
“I’m sorry. I don’t know what came over me.” You nodded at his words, your fingers pressed to your lips like you could still feel him there. “I’ll just go.”
You nodded again, your eyes vacant, and he made his way back to the main room of the bar. He looked back in time to see you slump against the wall, and he knew that you were thinking of a way to erase any trace of him on you.
-
The stage lights came on, you strummed your guitar and started to sing.
The first time I tasted somebody else’s spit, I had a coughing fit.
You let the lyrics you poured your heart into spill out across the stage. Still, somehow - in the crowd of hundreds of faces - you spotted Bucky.
This time, it didn’t make your heart clench. Didn’t make you shed a tear or run away.
No. This time, it empowered you. Let him hear the lyrics he inspired. Let him feel that pain of your words and feel the hole in your heart where he had broken it. Where you were now healing.
-
Bucky watched as you sang, and you were mesmerizing. He could feel the echoes of hurt in your words, the hole in your heart he had put there. He knew, despite the last time he saw you, that there was no making up. There was no fixing what was well beyond broken. No chance for him.
In five years I hope the songs feel like covers,
Dedicated to new lovers.
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strawburry01 · 2 days
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Enjoy the Silence
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Summary: (college) Aaron and Y/N at a halloween party where someone gets a little drunk. Still a little conflicted angsty. Don't need to have read the other stuff leading up to this but it helps!
Word Count: 3k
AN: Guys, why do things keep happening to me? I sprained my ankle so bad running after this exchange student I met like, two nights ago, and he just laughed! SMH. Forgive me for how terribly this may read near the end- I'm just trying to get something out. I'll edit it later (maybe) (probably not) (oopsies!)
It had been about half a year of you and Aaron studying tirelessly in the library, but it wasn’t for nothing. Both of you were getting the highest scores on the exams in class and had, by the grace of god, made it onto the Dean’s list last year. It left both of you more determined than ever, but also more inseparable than ever. At this point you were both either at the library, class, or at each other’s place, much to the dismay of your roommates who would like some peace and quiet some nights. Luckily for them, this was one of the nights you were both out of the house, as it was Halloween. Well, the Friday before Halloween. Nobody really wanted to party on a Monday night.
Aaron and you had fought about matching costumes for a while because you refused to dress as Sandra from Grease because you thought she was such a pushover and gave up all her morals for Danny, even thought it would’ve made for a really good costume. He eventually gave up and just admitted he wanted to wear his leather jacket and didn’t care what you dressed as.
Well that is until you met him at his house in a matching leather jacket. He shut the door on your face before you could open your mouth.
“We are NOT showing up to a costume party MATCHING,” he shouted from the other side of the door.
“Aaron you said you wanted to match though!” you shouted back, trying to hide back your laughs.
“You know what I meant Y/N and it wasn’t this!”. 
“Oh come on you kill joy everyone is going to be so jealous of how cute we look!” you laughed as you shoved your fists in your pockets, thinking you looked damn good. You heard him shuffle around on the other side of the door before finally opening it with a dramatic sigh and eye roll.
“You kill me,” he sighed as he started down the porch, letting you catch up to him. You smiled as you stepped into pace besides him. You were heading to one of his friend’s party’s for the night. Aaron insisted it would be fun, but he’d brought it up enough you were getting a little suspicious. Aaron started talking about his roommates' failed cooking attempts as you lit a cigarette between your lips. 
“You’re smoking?” he asked, stopping his story and turning to you as you puffed out a cloud of smoke. You turned away trying to hide it from him.
“So what? You worried about me?” you hummed, trying to diffuse his anger as you ashed the cigarette end. He rolled his eyes and focused back onto the sidewalk.
“That’s bad for you y’know?” he stated matter-of-factly.
“I do know Aaron,” you responded in the same tone as you tapped his shoulder with your free hand. He always hated when you started smoking. It was a cycle you’d gotten yourself into at the beginning of this year starting every few weeks and then quitting whenever Aaron would start stealing and hiding your packs. You smushed your cigarette into the ground once you were finished right outside the house. Aaron had put on some sunglasses to add to his costume which you giggled at. 
“Stop it, you know I look good,” he said as he threw his arm around your shoulders lazily leaning onto you as you both stood in front of the door. You laughed more and patted his chest as you snaked an arm behind his waist to steady him. His friend whips open the door and the noise of the party booms onto the porch. 
“Aaron! Y/N!” he shouted, the scent of alcohol already emanating off of him, “you made it!”. Aaron hugged his friend and started talking as you nodded your hello and slipped into the thumping house, letting the two catch up. It was already packed somehow even though it had just begun, that’s what they’d get for inviting a bunch of nerds. There were several black cats of varying authenticity, a few Gene Simmon’s look-alikes, a smattering of half-assed Jedi, and a fair amount of suspect Spidermen and other superheros. You smiled peacefully to yourself, despite the chaos around you, taking in the moment and what all led to you even getting invited to such an event. You slipped a hand into the cooler to grab a beer and cracked it open to start sipping on it as you watched the crowd. You’d always been a bit of a wallflower, while Aaron was the chatty one. Sure enough, he was still chatting with his friend, just as energetic as he was before. Your old lab partner Jen spotted you at the party and danced her way through the crowed until she was by you.
“Ohmygod Y/N, so great to see you!” she shouted over the speaker. You stifle a smile seeing how out of it she was.
“Jen, how are you?” you asked, trying to be sincere, swishing your drink. She nodded enthusiastically.
“I’m so great Y/N. Who do you know here?!” she said back. 
“Uhm, I’m here with Aaron,” you admitted bashfully. Sure enough Jen responded with raised eyebrows and a shoulder nudge.
“You guys are still talking? That’s going gooood?” she said, leaning closer and waggling her eyebrows. You playfully scoffed and pushed her away.
“You know it’s not like that Jen, we’re just…friends,” you said, glancing behind  her at Aaron still gesticulating a story to his friend. She moved her head to block your view.
“Sure and is that why you guys are wearing matching costumes?” she accused. You rolled your eyes and sipped the beer.
“It wasn’t on purpose,” you said under your breath. 
“You’re blushing!” Jen giggled obnoxiously as she shook you by the shoulders, to which you swatted her away and tried to shush her even though he was across the room. She aww-ed at your shyness and eventually calmed down. “Okay okay, but still-” she said, “you two are cute together,”.
“Thanks,” you mutter under your breath, looking around the room for Aaron again only to see he had finally moved away from his friend. Where did he go? 
“Hello Jen,” he suddenly chirped, appearing besides you, double fisting two red Solo cups. “Ah cheers,” he said quickly clinking his cups to your beer. 
“Hello Aaron!” she smiles back with a toothy grin, “Ugh you two look so good,” she said looking at both of you. Aaron smiled and looked down at his own outfit before looking at you and nodding, confirming her compliment.
“Thank you Jen, you look good too,” he said back, eyes glancing over her and her fairy costume. 
“You’re too sweet Aaron,” she said, “Okay okay okay I’ll leave you two alone, say bye before you leave!!!” she said in an airy tone grabbing both of your forearms before wandering back into the crowd. Aaron silently took a sip of one of his drinks and smacked his lips before looking back down at you.
“She’s- something!” he remarked. You nodded and matched him with your own sip. 
“She’s nice, just a bit of a party animal,” you agreed, “like someone else I know” you chuckled, elbowing Aaron.
“Pfft as if, I just like talking to people. Unlike soooome,” he retorted, elbowing you back.
“Let me catch up to you then I’ll get social” you jokingly grumbled, taking another sip. He snorted.
The party continued and Aaron and you split again. Sure enough, you do warm up to chat with your classmates and friends as you keep another beer in hand. You feel a buzz starting as you laugh loudly at someone’s joke as you attempt to land a ping pong ball into a solo cup across the table. You miss and loudly shout ‘SHIT!’, only to quickly feel a body pressed against your back, a hand holding onto your hip.
“Let me try for a redemption shot,” Aaron laughed, reverberating in your ear as someone hands him a ping pong ball. He completely misses and you both burst out laughing, and you take the opportunity to lean back on his chest, only to have his grip tighten on your hip. “I didn’t say I was going to be good,” he defended himself as you watched the opposing team try to make their shots. You reach behind yourself and pat his cheek.
“Sure you are,” you tease back, feeling his warm cheek under your hand before you go to grab another fumbled ball. It’s crazy how bad hand eye coordination gets when you’re drunk. You weren’t complaining though. Having Aaron this close was…nice, but you would never really admit it. The game continues and you two end up losing, but just barely. Aaron happily finishes the drinks as you insist you can’t handle any more, mostly because you’ve seen how long it’d been sitting out. Aaron’s fraternity brother tendencies came out whenever he was trying to impress people with these games. 
You expect him to step away once the game is done, but instead he stays right where he is, moving his arms up they’re wrapped around your shoulders, keeping you close. He sets his head on your shoulder blade and sighs.
“You alright?” you ask, tilting your head to look at him. You felt him nod onto your shoulder.
“I’m doing just swell Y/N,” he says, knowing he doesn’t need to shout, which makes a chill run up your spine. He tightens his grip for a second before changing his mind, “can we go to the couch actually,” he mumbles to you. You obliged and started to weave your way through the partygoers back to the living room where you know there’s a few couches. Aaron doesn’t let go, despite stumbling a few times into your back. You throw some coats left on a couch onto the arms of it and sit down, Aaron finally releasing his hold. He flops down, laying his head on your lap, leaving his legs dangling off the end of the couch. He grumbles and groans as he throws his sunglasses off into the void of people dancing. “Y/N…I’m getting the spins,” he groans as he rubs the heels of his hands into his eyes. Oh shit, Aaron’s actually drunk.
You can’t help but gently place a hand on his hair and run your fingers through it.
“Poor Aaron drank too much?” you asked in a sing songy voice.
“Don’t baby talk me,” he whined as he lowered his hands and kept his eyes firmly shut, “can’t you just make me feel better,”.
“What would make you feel better?” you ask, raising your eyebrows to yourself. His eyes flashed open and he opened his mouth to say something, but instead of words he shoots up and promptly throws up over the side of the couch onto the ground. Yeah, good thing you didn’t drink that shit. 
You make him lay down on the couch as you tie up your hair and start trying to clean up the mess. Aaron’s friend finds you trying and grabs your attention.
“Y/N, yeah? Don’t worry about it-” he said, not seeming stressed, “I got this if you just uh, promise to get him home,” he said, tilting his chin in the direction of the still groaning Aaron. You nodded dutifully, you would much rather take this deal. After a few minutes of convincing you’re able to coax Aaron to his feet, leading him out before he can throw up on the floor again.
He does throw up again in the lawn and you try to pat his back to make him feel better, although you’ve never really seen him get sick from drinking so you’re not sure if you’re helping or harming. The two of you are able to make it back to his house, in only twice the normal time due to his drunken ramblings requiring perfect stillness in the middle of the street. 
“Y/N, you know I love you right?” he says bluntly the moment you pull the key to his house out of his jacket pocket. You froze. You know he doesn’t mean it like that, unless he does. You can’t really trust him with how half-shut his eyes are right now.
“I uh, love you too Aaron,” you say, forcing a bit of a smile into the corner of your mouth as you open the door to the dark house. Dammit, he’s not shuffling back into his room without a tumble or waking up the whole house. “We’re getting you to bed okay?” you say to him, as you hold an arm around his waist to steady him.
“Can you spend the night? I love you,” he said through his mumbles as the two of you stepped into the house. He leans his head down so he’s just speaking into your hair. 
“Aaron I don’t know I-” you try to interject.
“But I love youuuu and you never spend the night,” he whines like a teenager as you kicked open the bottom of his door to try and avoid a clatter. You sigh as you navigate him to his bed and let him fall onto it.
“Take off your shoes ya drunk,” you say as you cross your arms and flick on the lights. He hisses at the bright lights, but does kick off his boots before trying to get under the blankets. He eventually opens his eyes again and looks at you.
“Please spend the night Y/N,” he says softly, opening the blankets, “I just want you here,”. You’d spent the night before with him, but usually just on the couch after falling asleep on his shoulder during a movie. Did he actually mean this? Or was he just that drunk? “Please?”.
You can’t say no to this guy’s face. You sighed  and kicked off your own shoes and hit the lights before crawling into the area under the blanket. You can hear Aaron trying to form a sentence but he just mumbles words as he pulls you closer by the small of your back. You give in and rest your head on his chest, hearing just how fast his heart is beating, glad it isn’t just your own. 
“Y/N?” he finally gets out, breaking the silence of just the two of your breaths. 
“Yes Aaron?”
“Don’t leave me,”.
“I won’t,”.
You feel him slowly rubbing your back before eventually falling into a loud snore. He’s lucky he was handsome, otherwise you’d be smothering him with a pillow. Eventually you’re able to fall asleep into the darkness, trying to not overthink things.
You wake up to sunlight hitting you directly in the eyes through the window across the room. You groaned and turned to try and hide your face, remembering at the same time you were in a bed that was not your own. You groaned as you realize Aaron isn’t in bed anymore with you. Shit. You sit up in the bed, rubbing your head groggily. As if on command, Aaron swings the door open with two cups of coffee. His face brightens as he sees you’re awake.
“Good morning Y/N,” he says, his morning voice making your stomach do a flip. Well, either that or the residual alcohol. 
“How are you feeling?” you ask him, as you gratefully take the cup. 
“Not the best, I can’t lie,” he admits as he sits at the foot of the bed. You wished he’d just come back under the covers though, “I don’t really remember coming back home,” he says as he takes a sip of the coffee.
“Do you remember any of last night?” you asked. He shrugs, still facing the door.
“I remember doing really bad at beer pong with you,” he offered, rubbing the back of his head, “was I embarrassing? Oh Christ what did I say-”.
“Nothing! You just threw up on the floor, and then I uh- took you home,” you nodded, agreeing to yourself on this story.
“Mmm,” he hummed, before silence took over the room again. He didn’t ask what you were doing in his bed. He didn’t admit that he did remember some of the drunken haze. It wasn’t lying that he didn’t remember the walk home- he really didn’t- but he did remember you unlocking the door. And he vaguely remembered admitting he loved you.
For now though, the silence was welcome. The two of you sipped your coffee. 
“We didn’t fuck right?” he asked, only to be met with a pillow to the cheek.
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ne0n-fantasies · 2 days
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I absolutely love orcs and I was wondering if I could request off bf with like a tall super strong afab reader who fights a lot and wins ik it’s super vague😅 sorry you could go in any direction you want with it I just want to see more orc x strong tall reader not little tiny human yk ahh I’m so awkward at requests 💔 I love your work though🫶
I love this idea sm!! I had a lot of fun writing it, I hope you like it :)
Trying to do at least one request a day, sorry to everyone if I take a bit to get to yours!!
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Orc x Strong & tall AFAB!Reader
In which an orc develops feelings for a human warrior
The first time you had fought against him and won, it had been in front of his clan. He hadn't heard the end of it, and so, challenged you to a rematch.
That's where you were now. You, with a smug grin on your face, looking down at him as he gave three taps on your arm. You won again. There were cheers around you, and his friends were heard laughing.
Normally, he would have been pissed. Would have challenged you again right away. But instead, as you let go and he got up to brush himself off, he looked flustered. Embarrassed, yes, but also a bit in awe.
"..you are mighty, for a human." He says, ruffling your hair before lightly shoving you, making you laugh.
"Perhaps you are weak for an orc," you tease, making him huff in annoyance. Still, there was a twinkle of amusement in his eyes. His friends laugh at your playful banter.
You had been staying with this particular clan for awhile, after being seperated from your own human party. Orcs, you found, were not nearly as aggressive as the stories told- at least, not unless provoked. Sure, much of their society was based on strength and battle, but they were an honourable people.
The orc before you, Mauzk, bowed his head to you. A subtle gesture, but one that meant the world- it was a sign of respect, typically reserved for higher ranking warriors or chieftains. With a soft smile, you returned the motion. You thought you saw his cheeks flush, but he turned away before you could be sure.
The next couple of days, he avoided you, making you wonder if you had done something wrong. However, when you asked his fellow clan members, they laughed and told you that no, you hadn't done anything. So, you decided to confront him about it.
"Mauzk?" You peaked your head into his tent. He grunted in acknowledgement, focused on sharpening the blade of his axe.
"Reader." He tried making his tone sound disinterested, but he seemed a little nervous. You huff, crossing your arms.
"I assume," you began, "that there's a reason you've been avoiding me?"
Mauzk scoffs, continuing to sharpen his blade- refusing to look up.
"I've not been avoiding you."
Rolling your eyes, you walk over, grabbing the axe from his hands. He looks at you with a mixture of annoyance and hesitance.
"Yes, you have!" A sigh leaves you as he crosses his arms and averts his gaze. "What is going on with you? You're acting like a schoolboy with a crush!"
He cheeks flush a dark green. Oh. Pausing, you stare at him- putting the pieces together in your mind. Then, you grin.
"You like me, don't you?" You already knew the answer. His silence said it all. You could tell he was embarrassed, though, and a bit nervous of your reaction.
Sitting down beside him, you cross your legs, looking at him with a wide smile.
"So... how about a rematch?"
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sunnitheapollokid · 16 hours
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hiii, feel free to ignore this if you want. if not, can i please req a daughter of oizys!shy! reader x leo valdez. a scenario where leo tries to get the reader out of their shell?
thank you sm :))
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☁️ ┊ ೃ࿔₊• DANCE WITH ME BABY!
↳ leo valdez x reader, daughter of oizys blurb / oneshot <3
☀️ sunni’s notes : THANK U FOR THIS REQUEST ARTIST!! y’all. literally all the requests i get are all so CREATIVE?? like the artists are creative. let them COOOOK. i absolute love this req (i love all the reqs tbh, but this one?? literally so good) and i’m tryna not to LET YOU DOWN. because my ass is shy, but more extroverted so I’LL TRY AND WRITE PROPERLY. pray for me y’all. anywhoooo, happy reading bebis!!! >0< *. (also some changes to layout,, how we like??)
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‎ (NAME), DAUGHTER OF OIZYS was always known to be reserved. always got her nose in a book of hers, or a drowsy tea that sent her napping for hours on end. she spent most of her time with her brother, if she isn't doing any of those activites.
that was until, a drenched son of hepheastus landed on the shore of camp half-blood. (name) didn't think too much of it, especially after they we're sent on the quest to release some godly figure. nobody would tell her how attached she'd get to the fireboy after he'd come back.
leo marched his way towards the sleppy gods' cabin, "(nickname)!! the stoll brothers are— wh— what the hell's going on in here?" the cabin was covered in stacks of books, only a small space of what you would call a path was found in the middle. "deep cleaning." clovis replied, his head in his pillow.
"she's over there." he yawned, (name) smiled at leo's direction. "you we're saying?" she asked, a stack of books in her hands.
leo chuckled, walking towards and trying to be careful enough not to knock any of the stacks down.
"the stoll brothers are having a party! we should go!" he raised the pamphlet in his hand. "..do you know who you're talking to?" she shoved the piece of paper away to get a look at his pouting expression.
"pleaaaase (name)! i won't ever ask you for anything else ever again!"
"leo, you said that about the last party." "and what would've happened if you weren't there to pat my back when i threw up?!"
she giggled, "mm.. i'll think about it." she bit her lip. leo nodded, "gotcha."
ೃ࿔₊•
‎ "I CAN'T BELIEVE you got me into this." leo winked in her direction, "you'll love it!" he took her arm as he led both of them in the hermes' cabin. "will i though-?" she was cut off by the music and lights inside. which surprisingly, there was a lot of space in the cabin for these campers.
she cursed under her breath, leo immediately greeted by others and his own siblings. "hey guys!" he beamed, his hand still around the wrist of the oizys' daughter.
"hi leo! (name)!" their voices echoed. (name) had only flashed them a smile, "come on let's get a drink." leo spoke, but more so, yelled, because of the noise.
(name) nodded, following after her curly-haired boyfriend to the beverages table. there was a wide row of selections, but the two picked up the same tropical fruit punch.
leo kissed her cheek out of the blue, but (name) was used to it, not giving much of a reaction. "thanks for coming out for me love." she smiled, her sleepy eyes matching the faint grin. "as much as i hate this, i'd go anywhere with you."
louder music played, travis being the dj, a circle had formed in the middle of the cabin. multiple campers stepped up to dance, showing their own skills.
there we're cheers echoing across the cabin as each camper danced inside that said circle.
"(nickname), don't you dance?!" leo yelled, his arm around her waist as he bopped his head to the beat.
her eyes widened, "no, no, no, no-" leo put their cups down, grabbing two of her hands with his own and running backwards with a smile to (name) as they made their way inside the circle.
the lights dawned over them, leo twirled her. the campers sent another set of cheers as the couple danced, (name)'s fear had simply disappeared when they swayed and spun to the music.
"hey, why are you laughing? you're not suppose to be laughing!" leo teased, "it's just," she laughed again, "you're a bad dancer." she bluntly replied.
leo taken back, eyes widened but was quickly replaced with a mirrored laugh. "yeah, maybe i"m just too good that i have to hide it with bad dance moves." he did his signature wink, continuing to dance.
(name) chuckled softly, "whatever helps you sleep at night baby."
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little italy
request: yes by @madsmadeit
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warnings: my bad writing…?
summary: chris’ chef skills are put on blast.
also: chris😛
also^2: i coulda sworn i posted this seven years ago but ok bro😭sorry it’s late
fit check
reader
chris
chris sturniolo x fem!reader
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“chris…?” you hummed, peaking into the dimly lit kitchen to see your boyfriend by the stove.
he turns around with a pot full of noodles in his hand as he gives you a small smile. you waltzed into the kitchen and set the grocery bags down, pulling out the salad and breadsticks you’d just picked up at the grocery store.
“so you told me to not order from little italy because you wanted to cook the spaghetti for noodle night?” you hummed, grabbing a cookie sheet so you could cook the breadsticks.
“mhmm, and don’t tell donatello this,” he hummed, referencing the owner of y’all’s favorite italian restaurant, “but i think this spaghetti is gonna top his.”
“oh wow, you’re pretty brave for that baby. you know donatello and his family make the best italian in boston.” you giggled, sliding the cookie sheet into the oven.
“you’ve also never, ever made spaghetti chris… why so confident today?” you asked, grabbing the bag of lettuce to make caesar salad.
“well, i wanted to make my princess a special little meal, seeing as it is our one year anniversary of the invention of noodle night,” chris said, grabbing two plates and putting even servings of noodles on them.
“noodle night” as the two of you called it was a designated night during the week that you’d enjoy various noodles and noodle dishes.
“aww baby, you remembered,” you said, tossing the salad and popping it into the fridge.
after the breadsticks were done and chris plated up the spaghetti and meat sauce, you two sat at the small kitchen table of your home.
“bon appetite angiolo,” chris smiled, watching as you looked down at the plate in front of you.
the spaghetti noodles themselves looked to be fine, if not a little pale. the meat sauce was very dark maroon, it’s usual redness that came from little italy nowhere to be found.
you smiled up at your adorable boyfriend as you grabbed your fork and spoon.
“i’m very excited to try it chris, it looks delicious.” you said, lying straight through your teeth.
as soon as you took a bite, you immediately had to try and not make a face.
how does meat sauce taste bitter? how are the noodles gummy? loads of questions ran through your head but the number one question was…
“how do i tell my boyfriend that this is the worst noodle night ever?”
you put your hand in front of your mouth as you chewed up the pasta, a small “mmm” leaving your mouth as you did.
as soon as you forced it down your throat and took a sip of water your eyes met chris’.
he had yet to take a bite of his own dinner because he was so intent on making sure you liked it first.
“‘s delicious chris..” you hummed, watching as he smiled and took a bite himself.
before he could even finish chewing, he immediately spat it out into his napkin.
“my god, that’s the grossest thing i’ve ever eaten…” he said, wiping his tongue off and gulping down some water.
“why didn’t you tell me it was gross?” he asked, immediately deflating.
“baby….” you hummed, grabbing his hand across the table.
“you worked so hard and i didn’t want to tell you that your work was fruitless.” you said, rubbing your thumb against the top of his hand.
“i am never ever being in charge of noodle night again,” he pouted, shoving his plate away from him.
“baby, that was our whole thing remember… noodle night is when we don’t stress about cooking and just enjoy each other and an easy dinner.” you hummed, smiling at him as he perked up.
“you’re right angel,” he said, standing up and taking the two plates with him.
“you call little italy? i’ll get the movie set up?” he said, already walking into the living room.
“sounds like a plan,” you said, walking to go grab your phone and deliver fresh pasta from donatello.
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heartthumpnovel · 2 days
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Heart Thump: Chapter 7
“Growing Pains”
Word count: 9437
Just got this wrapped up before I leave for a week! This is gonna be insight to how Jason is dealing with the new big changes in his life (I am not sorry). This chapter was very fun to write because it has my favorite character in it; Oliver :> By they way, since it seems people are getting interested in this story, I've seen people do tag lists for each chapter. Let me know if you're interested in that!
cw: Cursing/Swears
Last chapter: Seeking Answers
Next chapter: It Came From Outer Space
---
 Atlas Gang Group Chat November 9th @  3:00 pm
Jason: Just got out of the doctors office.
Jason: Won’t be dying anytime soon, but, It seems like I did get electrocuted at some point on the golf course. 
Ellie: FR??? Are you going to be okay?? 
Natasha: HOW?? OH MY GOD JASON HUN I AM SO SORRY!! I SHOULD OF GOT YOU TO THE HOSPITAL!!!! D’:
Motor: Shit dude. F.
Jason: Now don’t get too upset @Motor.
Jason: But to make this clear, @Natasha you have nothing to be sorry about. It wasn’t obvious and I had a bit too many drinks. I am still not sure what shocked me but I have those lighting scars on my back…
Ellie: Like Lichtenberg Figures? At Least those are the coolest scars to possibly have right? 
Jason: @Ellie I guess... I am just lucky I managed to live through it.
Motor:  bro you realize you don’t have to @ everyone you’re trying to talk to right??? It’s literally just the four of us here.
Jason: It’s called being efficient @Motor.
Motor: I don’t wanna hear pinging coming for you every five seconds. IT'S CALLED BEING ANNOYING.
Natasha: uh hey are we just gonna ignore the fact Jason nearly died from electrocution or??
Jason: Awh @Natasha It’s quite alright! The doctor said that I had little to no damage and the shock passed right through me. He did say that it was a risk considering my heart condition but, I am overall unharmed. However, he did write me up for two weeks of rest just to be on the safe side.
Natasha: Consider the call in done. Imma also gonna look into that golf course to see if there’s any loose wiring problems and give them hell!! >:(
Ellie: YEAH GIRL GET THEM!!!!
Ellie: And here I thought golf courses couldn’t get any worse. 
Ellie: But uh Jason, wasn’t there anything else the doctor … found out about your condition or?
Jason: No. Just pain medication and rest.
Motor: yeah no big deal..no BIIGG deal at all. >:3
Natasha: :/ ????
Jason: Shut it @motor. 
Natasha: Uhhhh
Ellie: Don’t worry about it Nat. :’D 
The phone screen went dark as Jason pressed the side button on his phone and shoved it deep into his pants pocket. He didn’t need the stress that Motor was giving him for nearly spilling the beans on the whole giant fiasco. It felt like the entire thing was one stupid joke away from giving away the big secret. He laid back in the bus seat and stared down at the small paper bag filled with the prescription antibiotic cream and tylenol that was settled in his lap. 
Thinking back on the doctor appointment, Jason wished he could have told his doctor everything that was happening to him. Maybe he could have gotten more than just stuff to treat the surprise scars on his back. But, the troubles that would have come from telling his doctor would have been extremely bad. His doctor could have thought that he was either having a mental breakdown, ran out of the room screaming if Jason were to prove the claim, and may have probably called the government to take him away to be then experimented on for the rest of his life. Yeah, there’s no way he was going to take those chances.
However, Jason was told that his heartbeat was now more noticeable and beating faster than usual. Not enough to be at the regular rate but a definite improvement than before the incident.  
“Huh, cure me a little bit and in exchange turn me into a freak of nature… Not really a fair trade is it?” Jason quietly mumbled to himself as he placed a hand on his chest. Looking outside the bus window to check for his stop, his mind began to wander as he witnessed the rain outside fall into the streets of Seattle. Sure, he does believe now that he was right in the middle of this weird phenomenon but it still felt so unreal. A monkey’s paw’s finger must have curled as he always wanted to be a few more inches taller, feel more happiness and have a clean bill of health. At this cost however? 
Definitely not worth it.
While listening to the bus’s public radio talk about this newly discovered meteor that was currently in orbit of the solar system, The bus slowed and pulled up to the bus stop where Jason needed to get off. He rose from his seat and stepped off the bus as quickly as he could. He just wanted to get home. Before he could make his walk back to his townhouse, Jason couldn’t help to notice the inky spot on the road that was across the bus stop. His memory started to jog and wondered how that lady with the crushed minivan was doing. 
Wait, had he seen that minivan before? Consequently, he could feel a slight pain emerge from his foot and once he put two and two together; He remembered. 
During that fateful night, he remembered getting the boot from a ride-share car. Jason couldn’t recall for the life of him why he was removed from the car or how he even was able to summon one in the first place. However, his drunk/electrocuted brain was thinking of Natasha for some reason and with the knowledge Jason gained about what happens when she enters his thoughts… 
He could only recall pieces of the night. Losing one of his nice dress shoes, stumbling in the streets, buildings slowly shrinking around him, and the moment his foot accidentally stepped on a hunk of metal that blared loudly as it was crushed beneath his weight. 
The pain in his foot stung worse and Jason immediately started speed walking down the street. He needed to get home ASAP before he unexpectedly grew again and caused more damage. If only he could repay that woman for her van and make it up to anyone else who was a victim of his carelessness. Though that would be very expensive, and he would have to admit that he was the giant freak that did it. Perhaps these one-time sins from when he didn’t know better could serve as a lesson to Jason to not let himself get carried away. 
That fast paced walking turned into a sprint as he had no faith in his wandering imagination. Thinking back on the bus ride, he realized that could have ended badly as well and Jason mentally scolded himself for putting people in danger. The few people he ran past stared at him and Jason for once didn’t care what they thought. He needed to put himself away at home where he could focus on NOT focusing on those lovingly destructive thoughts. 
He stumbled onto the stairs on his front door and shoved a hand into his pocket, fumbling on grabbing his keys. His two feet tapping anxiously on his welcome mat, and Jason using his other hand to search for the keys as well. Wait- where was his prescription bag!? His gaze darted below him and his head snapped to the bottom of the porch stairs. Jason spotted his nearly spilled out shopping bag on the sidewalk and just as fast as he sprinted there, he quickly shuffled his way down the stairs and nabbed his bag with a swift snatch. Muttering a few quiet ‘oh come ons’ before he managed to shove his key into the front door.
The front door swung open and slammed closed. Jason laid on the other side of the front door, trying to catch what little breath he had. It took the man a couple of deep breaths to find his bearings as his shoulders dropped. Though he did snap back to reality when he felt a comforting presence press on his calf. “Meow.” Jason looked down to see that his orange companion, Oliver, was already complaining about waiting for his dinner. The lovable dope had his tail raised and was rubbing his face into Jason’s pant leg, getting fur stuck on the fabric. “Awh is the little pumpkin hungry?~'' Jason cooed as he bent down and picked up Oliver by the sides to hoist the cat to be cradled into one of his arms, “Sorry I’m late, Daddy’s dealing with reality shattering stuff lately.” Jason walked into his cozy living room and dropped the prescription bag off at the coffee table while his orange fur-baby was meowing complaints. As he made his way to the kitchen, Oliver kept staring at Jason with his one eye and began to purr loudly as he lay comfortably in Jason’s scrawny arm. 
What a strange little creature.
Oliver didn’t stay in Jason’s arm for too long as he jumped off when he saw his food bowl come into view. A cat has his priorities after all. Going through the cabinets Jason started to tell his thoughts to his cat, just like any cat owner would even if the cat had no idea what the heck their owner was talking about. It wasn’t like Oliver could snitch on him or anything. 
“I honestly don’t know what’s happening to me Oliver,” Jason said as he peaked through the cabinets, “I’ve become a ticking time bomb overnight and now I am a threat to society without even meaning to be…” Jason grunted when he didn’t see the cat food in the usual place. 
“Wha- oh goodness I thought I just bought you a palette recently..” Jason spoke as he pushed some cans of soup aside and he tried to rack his brain on where in his house the cat food could be. It was about a week ago he went grocery shopping, and consequently that night had also been board game night with his friends from work. He did pick up some extra snacks for that night and Motor, while annoying he can be, actually offered to help Jason with the heavy groceries. 
He felt his blood run cold. Jason arched his neck up to the high cabinets in his kitchen. While it probably was a stupid idea for a short man like Jason to rent a home which felt like it was specifically made for tall people, it was a really good deal at the time considering he was living in Seattle. Besides, he had managed to live with it this long and had no problems since he had a step stool on hand. Though he had to admit, Motor putting the heavy cat food stack on a high shelf was seriously infuriating. 
Jason sighed and turned to find that step stool buried deep in the pantry. However, his feet stopped half way through the turn as he had a small thought sprout in his mind. What if instead of spending more precious time digging through his pantry to get the step-stool, Jason could just simply put that new side effect to good use. Jason shook his head for a moment, “Oh heavens no-” He mumbled as he took a step towards the pantry, “That’s ridiculous, I wouldn’t want to risk it…” He cleared his throat as he reached his hand over to the pantry door. The hand halted before it could grab the handle and Jason took another glance at the high up cabinet. It had never looked so close yet out of reach… 
“I mean,” Jason spoke towards Oliver, “Just maybe a little bit couldn’t hurt… Now I know about what the cause is..” “Meow.” “Yeah, it could end up being safer than throwing my back out! Smart boy, Oliver.” “Meow.” It has been decided, then. 
He made his way back to below the high up cabinet and stretched out his arms as if he was going to be entered in a weight lifting competition. A long concentrated deep breath came from him as he closed his eyes. Feeling a bit anxious from this but, if he only thought of her for a moment then it should only be a few inches right? “Alright Oliver, keep your distance.” Jason said as pushed up his glasses and wondered what he should specifically think about. Obviously nothing too intense, probably? He actually wasn’t sure when the point of no return was. His hands came together and made them hold each other. Maybe just the thought of holding her wonderfully soft palms might do the trick-- 
BANG
CRASH
“HISSSS! ROWWEEERRRR!”
CLANK
“AGGH! BOLLOCKS!!”
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[Image Description: Jason grew too tall and ended up slamming his head on the ceiling. This caused him to fall back onto the kitchen island and he got smacked by a pan and is in pain.]
In one brief moment, the kitchen descended into chaos. The height that Jason had desired was passed up very quickly and his head punched itself through the ceiling, causing a huge crack to form. Debris fell and blinded Jason for a moment- causing him to stumble backwards onto the kitchen island. In a different time, it was nice to have a really good cast iron steel set of pots and pans. At the moment however, the back of Jason’s head didn’t appreciate it as he tumbled into them. His back was sprawled across the counter and all he could do was hold the back of his head, seizing in pain.
“Oooowww-” The now 10 foot tall Jason moaned, “How... have I not gotten brain damage?…” He opened his eyes to a horrifying sight, not at his ceiling being caved in nor his expensive cooking equipment being scattered everywhere; but the sight of his poor fluffed up baby boy huddling in the corner and hiding his scared face behind his puffed up tail.
“Oh… oh no pumpkin I’m so sorry...” Jason cooed, feeling like an absolutely disgusting human being, “I-I didn’t mean to scare you, It’s still me Oliver…” Jason managed to flop himself over so he could lay on this stomach comfortably. He reached out a large hand to Oliver, who at first backed up from the offered hand. The man’s heart dropped from seeing this and expected Oliver to sprint towards the bedroom to hide from the big scary monster that invaded his home. 
Instead, Oliver slowly raised his head from his tail and stared at the hand with his good eye. His nose reached over to Jason’s huge fingers and gave them a couple of small sniffs. From this new perspective Jason gained, Oliver could have been mistaken as a kitten on how small he looked. This almost made Jason’s heart soar with glee as he’d never got the chance to meet Oliver when he was a baby cat, but what really brought him glee was when Oliver rubbed his fuzzy head into Jason’s palm and let himself be wrapped by his owner’s large fingers for scratches. Tears of happiness covered Jason’s knocked askew glasses.
Forgiveness was granted. 
----
After giving Oliver double the serving that he usually had for dinner, Jason crawled through his own home to get to the bathroom. The hallways of the townhouse had become more like service tunnels as he had to duck throughout the home. While he was careful to not smack his head on any light fixtures, his feet were having a hard time adjusting to the new walkway. The pain in the back of his skull was still stinging slightly from the incident so he used his free hand to massage it while the other large hand traced the walls and grabbed onto the door frame that entered the bathroom.  
“Ugh, the new pain meds are comin’ in handy today..” Jason mumbled before he looked up at the mirror, “AH!!-- Oh… oh.” 
He yelped for a brief moment before realizing that the bathroom mirror had only reflected himself. However, he almost didn’t realize it was him due to the fact he was now completely covering the doorway and he was crouching to be able to get inside the bathroom. 
Watching his reflection, Jason's emotions morphed from surprise to a tinge of sadness. It dawned on him why his coworkers had initially been apprehensive around him. With a resigned sigh, he maneuvered into the bathroom, barely leaving any space to spare. He chuckled at the thought that he had once considered this compact bathroom relatively spacious for townhouse living. Without further ado, he removed his glasses to splash water on his face.
“...Wha- Wait what!? Are you kidding me!? Noooo,” Jason spoke out of disbelief as his glasses suddenly shrunk right as they left his face, “How the hell?...” 
Try as he might, he couldn’t put them back on his face as they just simply wouldn’t fit. Jason couldn’t exactly get himself to fit the glasses either as the pain in the back of his head made it near impossible to concentrate. 
“Oh, that’s just great…” Jason said sarcastically as he placed his glasses on the bathroom counter, “That’s how it’s going to be then.” He rubbed the arch of his nose before gingerly turning the faucet on. Splashing cool water on his face did make him feel a little bit more grounded despite the weirdness. He patted his face dry with a teal bath towel before eyeing his sweater vest and polo. 
“I guess I’m not expecting visitors or going out like this…” He mumbled to himself as he grabbed the bottom of his polo and started to pull it over his head, “But I’ll leave the trousers on for now- Ugh!” Jason grunted as he was having a bit of trouble trying to get his upper wear over his shoulders. His elbows had hit the ceiling and the lack of space made it hard to yank the polo combo off. Undeterred, Jason persisted, shifting and shimmying until he successfully removed the polo shirt. 
Jason held onto the clothing and was rather stunned as he saw that it too, had shrunk back down to his normal clothing size. This brought on more questions from Jason; Why did his clothing shrink back to normal when he took them off? Does anything in his pockets change size too? How is his clothing growing along with him and not getting ripped to shreds?
Jason shivered, perhaps he should just be grateful that he gets to remain fully clothed as the alternative would be a whole new set of problems to deal with. 
He tossed his clothes into the hamper to put an end to those thoughts and looked back at the mirror. His large hands nearly eclipsed the bathroom counter as he gingerly placed his palms on it. His eyes traced the scrawny ribs and various fresh bruises that marked the kitchen incident. An uncanny feeling was raised from within as it felt like a crime against nature itself for a body type like his to be able to fill an entire room.  
Spotting the end of the lighting scar on his shoulder, Jason reached out his fingers to touch it and turned a little bit to get a better look at the wound. The appearance of this scar shocked him as he hadn't felt pain from it till days after the incident. His muscles tensed up from touching the scarring and he pulled away to just stare at it. While getting a Lichtenberg figure from a lightning strike wasn’t uncommon, what was strange about this scar was that the entry point looked shaped like a cartoon heart. Probably a silly coincidence or a mocking branding. 
Coming to terms with his condition felt impossible, it wasn’t like anyone else in the whole world that could relate to him. He could no longer stare at the freak in the mirror and hung his head low, thoughts wondering if this meant he could never truly find happiness in a relationship. While he didn’t want to be in a relationship, now it was as if he no longer had any say in the matter. Tightness built up in his chest; what did this all even mean and why him? Perhaps he was being selfish for falling hard for someone who could be fired and have her life ruined if he’d dared to act on his feelings. 
“Meow.”
“Oliver? Oh bloody hell I left the door open didn’t I?”
“Meow!”
His eyes squinted to try to make out the fluffy orange blob that passed under his legs and was rubbing his ankle dramatically. The flick of Oliver’s tail made Jason’s frown curl into an appreciative grin. Oliver’s paw twitched a little bit from the unexpected puddle on the floor, Jason looked back up in the mirror and realized his face was completely wet with tears. 
“I-I’m sorry for crying like a big baby Oliver, That’s very unbecoming of me…”
“Meowwwwww.”
Jason reached down gingerly to hoist the fluffy noise box off of the tile and into his arms. Oliver squirmed a little as Jason tried to find a comfortable position for his fuzzy son due to his arms being much longer. It only took a few seconds to adjust and Oliver was once again cradled like a newborn comfortably. 
“Oh my gosh Pumpkin you’re so tiny~”
Jason sniffled as he used one finger to lightly pet Oliver’s fluffy tummy as he turned away from the mirror. Truthfully, It was awkward trying to shuffle out of the bathroom with a bundle that demanded attention. The kitty’s insistence was a little bit annoying, but the annoyance was overpowered by how Oliver wields his cuteness to his advantage. 
While it took a minute to navigate his home, he managed to get to his living room. Thankfully the ceiling was raised considerably, so he didn’t need to stress his back anymore. Getting to his usually comfy leather couch, Jason ever so carefully lowered himself down. The squeals from the wooden legs made him flinch and held onto Oliver for support. When he managed to sit completely down onto the couch, he sighed in relief that it didn't give way. Looking around his living room, he started to notice the fragile photographs that adorned the walls, the expensive television across from him, and plenty of breakable items that are precious to him. More things he could quite easily destroy without meaning to. 
He’d let go of Oliver and the orange fluff cloud pranced onto the low coffee table, sitting down regally with his tail covering his front paws. “Well,” Jason said, leaning down to his right and attempting to make himself comfortable on his ‘new’ loveseat sized couch, “I think it’s about time to reorganize the place, just to be on the safe side.”
The couch creaked in protest, as Jason laid his back to toe cushion and his neck cradled haphazardly on the arm rest. His long legs found it uncomfortable to curl up on the couch, so they stretched out over the opposite armrest, and the soles of his feet rested on the floor. Finally, he had managed to find some comfort in this new body of his.
He took a deep breath and- SNAP
Oliver leaped off the coffee table in response to the loud noise, caused by the couch's plywood giving way under the weight it was never meant to bear. Although it startled Jason for a moment, his body sank back onto the broken couch with a disappointed sigh. What else was new?
------
A Ravine [ Dream II ]
She was farther than ever before;
Across the Ravine.
Upon looking down, 
He couldn’t comprehend the unseen.
Before he could plead,
His chest burned.
No fear, no regrets
He took the leap.
The blue moon loomed
Claws dragged his ankles down,
Before he could cross;
Abyss cemented his doom.
Down he fell into the ravine;
Knowing he will never be seen.
Darkness consumed all,Lost forever within the Ravine.
------
It wasn’t a recent development for Ellie’s hatred of college level essays about the unclean parts about mental health. Though she didn’t like writing essays in general, she really had to double her effort from having to research grotesque subject matter. While it was necessary for her future career, damn if it wasn’t a mood killer. The blank document’s cursor flickers in mockery at Ellie as he sat on top of her bed sheets. Curled up with a nice warm cup of matcha on the side and held a firm grip on the sticker covered laptop on her lap. Sadly, she couldn’t use her love birds as an excuse to procrastinate as they were in the middle of their mid day cuddle nap. Ellie rubbed her nose in frustration, her mind pulling out blanks for an introduction for a tricky subject such as this.
After another embarrassing date going south, she wasn’t in the mood to chat up potential bachelorettes either. This left her with just herself, and the doomed assignment. 
Usually when she found herself stuck on inspiration for stuff like this, she’d head over to her best friend that was conveniently next door for guidance since he’d always had a knack for essay writing. Unfortunately, he wasn’t available and hasn’t been for a week. Ellie missed the days where they’d open their bedroom windows to chat nonchalantly about their weekend or gossip about their coworkers. It was one of the reasons why they rented these townhouses as they could stay in touch and get those sweet discounts on the places. However, every time Ellie peaked through her bedroom window to check to see if Jason was there, his curtains had remained closed. Ellie did think about heading over there herself to check if he was okay, though her deep rooted fear held her from going. It wasn’t like she was scared of Jason necessarily. What monster would be afraid of their best friend suffering from an unknown sickness? On the other hand, her sleep had been tormented with imagery of being unknowingly squashed under a heel and feeling like a helpless bug in an uncaring universe.
This part of herself she knew, long before this mess. A deep sinking feeling of panic brewed when she passed by unthinkably tall buildings and passed on Motor’s movie night ideas. If she could diagnose herself, she'd guess it was a classic case of megalophobia. That fear was usually unfounded and didn’t affect her life day to day usually so she wasn’t that upset about it. Until now. While she did manage to push through it during their experiments in the forest for her friend’s sake, she did have to binge through videos of kitten fostering videos to cope through the tears.
Ellie noticed that she was gripping the sides of her laptop and biting her tongue as her stress boiled over. Her laptop was pushed onto her bed and she rose from her sheets with a determination filled with obligation. She rushed to her drawers and got dressed into her usual autumn weekend outfit.
Her heart couldn’t take the communication break down anymore. Ellie needed to make sure Jason was alright and the thought of abandoning her friend when he needed her most made her feel like a disgusting coward. 
Ellie snatched her keys and rushed by her chirping lovebirds as she made her way to the front door. Once she shuffled down the front steps, her gaze turned to Jason’s front door. At first she couldn’t find the strength to move her feet, the mere thought of what could be happening in there made her blood run cold. Though it was too late to bail now. 
With one last look at her front door, Ellie sighed and her heavy feet walked up to the front door of Jason’s home and she knocked her fist on the door. Ellie’s shoulders jumped when she heard a dramatic thud coming from within the home. Her concern only grew from there as the noise was followed with a few scraping noises and then silence. 
“Uh, Hey man are y-” Ellie said before the front door suddenly swung open, revealing a normal sized, but uncommonly disheveled Jason with a deceitfully wide grin. 
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[Image Description: A very concerned Ellie staring at Jason, who has opened his front door and is leaning on the door frame with a wide guilty grin.]
“Heeeeey Ellie,” Jason said, with fake cheerfulness, “It’s so nice to see you! Man alive, how long has it been?” “Uh, about a week…” Ellie said, trying to peek her head behind Jason, “Wanted to check in on… things.”
Jason shoved his head in the way of Ellie’s eye line while he kept that telling grin on his face. “OH! Things have been just swell! ” Jason paltered.
And as if the universe itself took offense, a shelf crashed to the floor. 
Ellie peered further over Jason’s shoulder and decided to push him aside despite Jason’s protest. To no one’s surprise; everything wasn’t swell in Jason’s abode. Bits of the ceiling fluttered onto the carpet and the cardboard boxes that had been hastily taped up. Once Ellie looked up, she could see multiple sized dents in the ceiling with a few expensive looking holes.
“Jason…” Elllie gasped, turning to look at Jason who at this point was hiding his face with his fingers. “I know…” Jason groaned, “the landlord is going to bloody kill me.”
Ellie gestured her hands towards the disaster in his house, “You did all of this in a week!?” Her voice raised, more so out of concern than disbelief. Jason kept his head low and moved past her into his ruined living room in shame as he laid a hand on one of the boxes. “Getting used to this disease has been harder than I anticipated…” Jason confessed, “I’ve been putting everything breakable away and haven’t left the house for days.” At this point he had completely dropped the act, his face darkened in shame. 
“Oh gods…” Ellie said as she reached a hand out to Jason’s shoulder to comfort him. Though right before she could, she heard a familiar yowl come from the couch. Her attention was shattered and she cooed at Oliver, who was trying to take a needed nap and was rudely woken up by the commotion. Ellie bee-lined towards the couch and scooped up the orange fluff ball into her arms. 
“Right, that’s why you came over,” Jason said with snark as he approached the two. 
“Nooo, I did come over to see how you were doing,” Ellie said as she bounced Oliver like a newborn, “But I mean, come on look at him!” She hoisted Oliver up in her arms and the look in his eye showed that there was truly a void of nothing behind it. 
Jason couldn’t wallow forever and acquiesced with a chuckle. He petted the top of Oliver’s head and kept his eyes on his little furry friend as he spoke to Ellie. “He somehow still loves me after all of this mess, ” Jason said, “Though I’m not sure how long I can control myself to keep him safe.” 
An awkward silence filled the room after that. Ellie sighed as she looked at her dissonant friend and she gave herself a moment to ponder the situation. She took note of the crater’s in the ceiling and the clearly evident eye bags below Jason’s eyes. “How much sleep are you getting?” Ellie asked as she set Oliver free. The cat pranced out of Ellie’s arm and onto the back of the broken couch. Jason sighed as he put a hand on his forehead in foggy thought. “None,” Jason complained, “I’ve been having a lot of dreadful nightmares and I’m afraid I’ll wake up to find myself homeless.” 
Ellie anxiously tapped the broken remains of his couch and took a deep breath. She gave a comforting gaze to Jason despite her own comfort. “Why don’t you come over to my place?” Ellie suggested, “We can try to do research on this thing, just like what we used to do in college.” She put a firm hand on Jason’s shoulder as he recoiled in shock. Before his stuttering could refuse, his head shook vehemently and he tried to pull away. “Wh-what!?” Jason exclaimed, “N-no! No, that's a terrible idea! Do you want me to get you in trouble with the landlord too!?” Ellie thought to argue that. “Look around, You’ve been isolated for way too long and it’s gonna drive you nuts!” Ellie said as she gestured her hand to the disastrous state of Jason’s living room, “Besides, I know that you’re gonna be extra careful if the house isn’t yours, you’re too considerate.” Jason folded his arms. It was very rare that he was unsure of his friend’s judgment, though at the moment, his doubts were plenty. “It’s dangerous,” Jason said, “I’m not keeping myself locked in my house for no reason Ellie.” He pushed Ellie’s hand away grimly and stared at the floor longingly. 
Well, Ellie didn’t care for that one bit. She took it upon herself to scoop up Oliver, who chipped in surprise,  from the couch and marched towards the door. “In that case, I’m sure Oliver would love to study with me to find out how to cure your stubborn butt.” Ellie said while she headed straight towards the front door with a sly grin on her face. “Wait- WAIT ELLIE,” Jason called after her and clumsily followed her trail like a helpless puppy, “You can’t just take my cat! Hey- ELLIE! HOLD JUST A SECOND-!!” 
------
If one were forced to think of one word to describe Ellie’s living room, it could very well be ‘serene’. The place definitely looked lived in, but it was a very clean mess of psychology textbooks on the handed-down oak coffee table, that had been gifted to her by her mothers. Pots were placed around the room that cradled many different types of plant life, and in one corner, Ellie's cassette collection laid haphazardly near her vintage boombox. Despite the apparent disorganization, she never had trouble locating any mix-tape in that pile. Music selection was not a frequent problem, though, as her two very vocal love birds' cage occupied a central position in the living room.
Jason had been sitting quite uncomfortably on her bequeathed bargain couch, though not due to the lack of support from the couch, but because he was essentially held hostage there. His traitorous kitty decided he wanted to spend time with auntie Ellie after being catnapped. He crossed his arms pouting, trying to ignore the smug look she had on her face as she entered the kitchen. “Whatcha want to drink?” Ellie asked.
“Earl grey,” Jason said, “Also you’re evil.” “I know,” Ellie playfully replied as she disappeared through the doorway. 
As much as he wanted to right then, Jason couldn’t seethe forever and eventually released the breath he was holding. He knew she was just trying to help but he was more scared than angry at her insistence. His gaze checked around the room for anything potentially breakable and expensive. By the end of the first week of being a circus freak, he’d picked up a new awareness of how fragile things can be and how much of a hassle it would be to replace them. Jason stood up from the couch, not wanting to dwell on how much money he was already losing, and made his way over to the pair of love birds. 
“Ah! Hello Mango and Papaya,” Jason greeted them as he leaned over to the cage,  “Oliver is in the guest room right now so you two can stretch your wings, yeah?” Mango squealed in agreement as the door to the cage was opened and she hopped excitedly onto Jason’s hand. Papaya decided to stay cautious and only peaked her head out to check on Mango’s well-being. Mango had always been the more approachable one out of the couple. Jason’s thumb scratched the love bird’s neck and ruffled her head feathers. She leaned her head towards his hand in merriment, as her closed eyes smiled in bliss. For a minute, Jason completely forgot that he was forced to be there against his will. He showered the bird in affection until their wholesome interaction was cut short. 
Despite the desperate neck stretches and opening her beak to show authority, Jason didn’t realize that Paypapa wasn’t going to let her soulmate be taken by some human tart. She thought to rectify this slight and confronted Jason with a hard bite on the fingertip. “Owch! Okay fine I’ll put her down, god-” Jason stammered as he let both birds onto the top of their cage. He rubbed the small bite mark on his finger as he saw his aggressor frantically groom Mango. Despite the pain of being chomped on, Jason chuckled after the fact. “My apologies,” Jason said, “I almost forgot you’re a bonded pair.” While he was not a bird expert, it was obvious that Papaya was just trying to protect her sweet girlfriend.  How romantic.
Only for a moment Jason got lost in thought, unaware of his surroundings as his mind was swooned by the very idea of soulmates and his longing desire to have one for himself. To be honest, he did feel a tad jealous these birds have a better love life than he ever will. The train of thought crashed as he heard a loud gasp, tea being spilled and the feeling of the ceiling pushing down on his head. 
“Oh gods, J-JASON!” Ellie stuttered, trying to regain her composure from nearly suffering from a heart attack by the sight of a giant suddenly appearing in her house.  Panic flooded onto Jason’s face as he realized he wasn’t as careful as he thought he was. “I-I’m sorry!” Jason begged as he tried to crouch down, trying to make him seem smaller in vain, “I’ll try not to break anything on the way out.” Before he could start crawling towards the front door in a fit of panic, Ellie rushed to set the un-spilled mug of earl gray onto her coffee table and approached him. “Wait!” Ellie said, with her phobia and compassion at war with each other, “You don’t have to go! It’s fine, I swear!”  
Jason halted and looked at her in disbelief. While he wasn’t the best at reading people like Ellie was, even he could tell that Ellie was terrified of him and was just trying to be polite. “I know you’re scared of me,” Jason said bluntly, “My feelings aren’t hurt, I’ll just take my leave.” 
A harsh tug on the bottom of his t-shirt stopped him from turning around. He looked over to see that Ellie is gripping the fabric as if she was able to actually keep the man the size of a Honda from escaping. Though that sad desperate look in her eyes may as well have bolted him to the floor.
"No! I might be scared, but I'm even more terrified for your well-being!" Ellie argued, “No matter what horrifying thing you turn into; Giant, cockroach, hell, a giant cockroach! I’m still not going to abandon you!” Jason sighed heavily and before he could even begin to formulate an argument, Ellie cuffed her full hands together. “Please let me help you,” she pleaded, “you don’t have to deal with this alone.”
Jason felt this stomach tie up in knots. He’d already felt guilty for being a terrible house guest, but he couldn’t just say no to her insistence. Jason stared at the floor in shame as he admitted defeat. “Fine,” Jason said, “I’ll stay.” 
Ellie smiled, releasing her shaking hands and turned to pick up the spilled tea mug off of the floor. “We’ll figure it out,” Ellie said, “Besides, what kind of a cat dad leaves their precious baby behind?~” Jason groaned, “Don’t push it.”
----
This impromptu study session really did bring back those college freshman memories when Ellie and Jason had to cram for exams. However, the tension wasn’t being built by a demanding deadline. Ellie felt the stress when she peaked over her laptop and saw the gargantuan man sitting next to her couch trying to gently sip the tiny mug in his massive hands. His fingers fidgeted around the mug's handle uncomfortably. He also kept hesitantly pulling the cup towards his lips but, whenever it got near his mouth, he pulled away reluctantly. Watching this constant backpedaling was starting to be unbearable to watch. “Dude, I can make you tea in a mixing bowl,” Ellie commented, glancing over to see Jason’s grimacing face being offended by the mere suggestion.
“What? No,” Jason said as he tried to ‘properly’ hold his mug, “I don’t need to feel anymore out of place than I already am.” He uncomfortably shifted as he glanced down at his remarkably large hands that nearly enveloped the little mug. Ellie rolled her eyes, sharing that same gaze to his mug. “Getting accommodated doesn’t make you weird,” Ellie said, taking a sip herself before turning her attention back to her internet browser, which had several open Wikipedia tabs. They’d been looking at a variety of human body size disorders that could fit the bill. None of them helped in the slightest, since it seemed like Jason’s condition was anything but normal for a human. Ellie started to mass-close all of those useless tabs as Jason sighed in defeat and sat the mug onto the coffee table gingerly. 
“I don’t even know why we’re bothering trying to search this… thing on the internet,” Jason said, folding his arms, “It’s not like some other poor sod could be going through the same deal, and if we do find something, it’d be some weirdo’s fantasy writing.”
Ellie thought for a moment before snapping her fingers. “Myths! We can look at legends around the globe for answers,” Ellie said excitedly as she started to type search terms in the browser bar. “Why myths?,” Jason asked, “Shouldn’t we be looking for, you know, factual evidence?” “There’s a nugget of truth in a lot of cultural tales,” Ellie explained as she pulled up more web pages filled with different stories concerning giants, “Maybe one of them is actually true.” “You’re sounding an awful lot like Motor,” Jason said as he pushed himself a tad closer to Ellie and arched his neck so he could get a look at the kind of ridiculous stuff she was searching for. The listings had notable large figures such as the treacherous Gogmagog to the vastness of the Daidarabotchi, though many of these listings seemed to pull up gods or malevolent creatures. Jason was sure he was definitely not either of those things.
Probably.
While Ellie may have been on the right track, Jason couldn’t see how any of these beings and monsters had any relation to him. Though it was getting hard to read her laptop screen as she kept tabbing through websites at top speed. While this made Ellie great at procrastinating and getting away with it in her college classes, Jason wanted to research too.
A brief flicker of recognition flashed registered in Jason’s brain as he spotted golden fur for a split second through Ellie’s browsing. Quickly Jason leaned over her and without thinking, slammed his hand next to hers. “Hold on! Can you… Ellie?” Jason attempted to ask before he realized that Ellie’s body froze suddenly. The only thing that was moving was her shivering hand. It felt like her entire soul left her chest and seeing a huge hand that could have weighed more than a brick nearly missed hitting her frail fingers. Ellie’s neck craned slowly tilted her head upwards hesitantly to be met with Jason’s wide chest. Ellie was rendered speechless and Jason eventually picked up on that. He lurked away from her, sputtering apologizes as he proceeded to sit on his hands. “I’m so sorry I-I didn’t think about- I’ll keep myself right here,” Jason nervously trembled as he watched Ellie let go of a sigh of relief she herself didn’t realize she was holding.
“Warn me next time will ya? Geeze,” Ellie said as she tried to regain her composure and sense of safety, “could’ve lost my writing hand.” Compulsively, Ellie rubbed her wrist as she kept her eyes off of Jason for the time being. For now, she pushed down that icky feeling of distress and flicked through some of the back pages silently to see what Jason nearly broke her hand for.
“...It’s uh- … the golden dog I think,” Jason muttered with his gaze glued to the floor, “It looked familiar.” After a quiet moment that felt like ages, Ellie finally spoke up again after taking a swig of her tea.
“The Golden Beast,” Ellie began to read out loud, “A phenomenon seen around the world of a large golden canine that is very elusive, but it is said to be a symbol of great change and good harvest.”
Jason waited for a moment to listen intently to Ellie’s lecture, but nothing else came. “... and?” Jason asked, though he got his answer when Ellie shrugged with a disappointed look. “That’s it, not much information written down here,” Ellie responded as she went ahead to search for the term elsewhere on the internet. Both of them would be lying if they said they weren’t disappointed, especially Jason. 
“I swear I’ve seen something that looked similar but,” He commented as he easily finished off his tea with a single sip, “I just can’t seem to recall anything.” He sat the mug down and watched Ellie peruse through a few websites, but in the end didn’t seem to find much else about the mysterious beast. 
“Another brick wall… bummer,” Ellie said as she stretched her arms outward, making sure her wrists weren’t getting sore. Her bones cracked as she rolled her shoulder, she had attempted to loosen up and let go of the pent up anxiety she had plenty of. In her peripheral vision she could see Jason reaching his head to the side to look hopelessly at Ellie’s laptop without having to get too close to her. 
“There really is nothing that can help me is there?” Jason said as he slumped, “Figures.” The two of them sat in silence for a while, unsure of what they could possibly do next or even find a trail to follow for the answers to their building questions. Ellie even half-mindly scrolled through news sites for anything unusual happenings. Though other than a couple of strange meteoroids being found around the globe, it was all mostly just news of politicians lying, groan worthy e-celebrity drama and a heartwarming story of a local pit bull named Twinkles saving a bus full of deaf school children from falling into the Vancouver River.
Ellie took a deep breath, “Jason I’m sorry I can’t…” Before Ellie could properly apologize to him, she noticed that Jason had a few visitors perched on the top of his head that were tugging tufts of his hair. Though he didn’t seem to notice it himself until he saw the despair disappear from Ellie’s face and she started to chuckle. She couldn’t keep a straight face for even a second. 
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[Image Description: Mango and Papaya are playing in Jason’s hair and Ellie is just sitting there. LAUGHING. ]
“Hey, what are you two doing!?” Jason exclaimed, trying to gently shoo away the uninvited guests. The birds of course, did not even acknowledge Jason’s attempts to evict them. Papaya just tugged at tufts of his hair to see if she could make a nest and Mango naively rolled around in the strange grass they discovered. If he had just been a little more stern, he could have negotiated with Mango and Papaya to retreat. However, Jason’s hesitant hands and soft voice made it clear that he wasn’t going to risk being slightly rough with Ellie’s pets.
“Uh- a little help please?” Jason asked as he turned his awkward gaze back to Ellie. She stood up from the couch, and from there, she had to hold on a second to take in how large her friend had become. Her mind could still barely comprehend a giant human being real and be sitting in her house. However, that pleading look in his eyes that paired with his helplessness from the invasion of her birds made one thing very clear: Despite her skin crawling, he was still a harmless dork. “They probably think you’re a tree,” Ellie giggled, feeling confident enough to wave him down closer to her. The giant hesitated, unsure if he really wanted to loom over her like a beastly ogre and give her heart’s well being a run for its money. That thought ended quickly though as Papaya started to nip at the brim of Jason’s glasses. “Oh good grief,” Jason mumbled, rolling his eyes and leaned down towards Ellie’s direction. His shadow engulfed Ellie as he eclipsed the ceiling light to draw closer. The heart in her chest might have exploded in fear when he bowed his head at her. Though upon seeing the little trouble maker’s untroubled play in his hair, Ellie’s shaking ceased. Perhaps, there wasn’t anything for her to worry about after all. Ellie reached her hands out to coerce her babies onto her shoulder and pushed aside tufts of hair to get to them. Though she froze when she felt a huge sigh brush against her legs. “I don’t know what to do,” Jason groaned, “no one in the world is going to know how to help me, never mind fix me.” His fingers halfheartedly fiddled with his socks, not really giving Ellie’s fiddling with his hair much mind. Ellie frowned, placing her birds onto her shoulder and gave the crown of Jason’s head a few pats. “Thanks,” Jason said. “No problem…” Ellie responded, though she did pause for a moment to contemplate a suggestion that Jason probably wasn’t going to like very much.  “You know, ” Ellie continued, “there is someone who knows a lot about giants and he already knows about this curse.” “No way,” Jason objected, raising his head up to look Ellie in the face. She stepped back in a panic, trying to not be in the path of his drastic head swing. “Wait- hear me out,” Ellie pleaded, “Motor might be a bit… eccentric, but he might be our only available expert on how to handle yourself when you’re like- big.”
“He’s not a professional Ellie, he's a nerd,” Jason said, folding his arms indignant, “all he’d be able to teach me would be how to level a hospital.” Jason kept coming up with complaints while he watched her carry her birds back to their cage. Though most of those unwarranted complaints went through one ear and out the other. “And he’s just not all that bright honestly, how could I trust that ido… ” Jason’s rant was cut short by the daggers Ellie was staring at him, “My bad.” He learned to shut his mouth and sat there with gripped hands on his knees. “I know you two aren’t always on the best of terms,” Ellie said, “but he wants to help you and might be your only option for insight.”
The very idea of Jason having to grovel to Motor for help was already humiliating enough, but reaching out to him about this life threatening disease? Jason would almost rather stay indoors for the rest of his life. Realistically however, it would be only a matter of time before he hurts someone or destroys his house. Unfortunately it would seem like getting help from Motor was going to be his only option even if it was going to be an agonizing experience. 
“Augh, Alright then if I don’t have a choice,” Jason said with a defeated sigh, “can’t help to feel that this is going to be a big mistake.”
Ellie closed the bird cage behind her, “Come on man,” she said as she walked back to Jason with a smile on her face, “What’s the worst thing that can happen?”
“Something terrible I reckon,” Jason responded, his fingers gripping his knees with another long sigh, “Also uh, can you help me shrink back to normal please?”
-----
Nothing happens in Stanley, Idaho. Well, that’s how one particular citizen would like to keep it. 
This unassuming older woman stepped out of her lifted jeep with little effort and made her way inside the tea shop. A subtle exchange of knowing nods were exchanged between her and the front store worker as she walked past the meticulously put together display of various tea leaves. Upon reaching the elevator in the back of the shop, she proceeded to press the following buttons: Lobby, 1, 9, 8, 7, and pound. The elevator closed, and took her below the ground floor, which shouldn’t be possible for a two-story building. 
As the elevator took its sweet time, she glanced down at her Hamilton military watch and gripped onto her steaming hot americano in her other hand. Seeing the watch read ‘5:00am’ made her groan with distaste. It was way too early for her to be up at her age. Duty calls, however, and she begrudgingly accepted.
After waiting for what felt like an eternity for the elevator to stop on the correct floor, she stepped out and was greeted by a long metal corridor that was barricaded with several security doors. Unperturbed, the woman walked up to each door, the same song and dance she always put up with to get to her damn office. Fingers to the hand scanners, eyes to the headache inducing retina scanners, and the most embarrassing of all, sticking her tongue out to a DNA analysis to let her through the final door. She had wondered if the engineers thought that last trial was some kind of bad joke. 
Nevertheless, She slogged into the massive intelligence operation room that was filled with the panicked voices of government workers. They have all been responding to all sorts of calls for assistance to deal with found anomalies and confused 911 operators. However, the older woman was used to this chaos, and promptly walked past all of the pesky underlings trying to ask her questions. Even if she wanted to answer their queries, she had no idea what was going on or what she was called in for during her vacation. 
Once she got to her office, she took off her windbreaker coat and wearily donned her standard issue FAIRA director’s coat. Before she headed to her desk, her hand shuffled through her windbreaker coat’s pocket and pulled out an opened box of cigarettes. Today was going to be difficult, why else would her superiors spring a surprise call-in on her? It didn’t take long for her to sit down at her desk and log her passwords into the computer with the help of her countless post it notes. The video call did not take its time either, ringing the moment her desktop loaded. She rolled her eyes and answered. 
“Witch reporting in, receiving you loud and clear Eagle,” the director spoke before she heard the ear-grating voice come from the other end. 
“EEEY BLAIR! How’s it goin’ grandma?”
“Sir, we have discussed this, we need to use our code names, also do not refer to me as grandma ever again.”
“OOOOH YEEEAAAH… I forgot.”
“Of course, sir. Anyway, was there any godforsaken reason why I was pulled from my vacation?”
“Calm down grandma! This is your crop and you gotta be the cream of it, ya hear?”
“Just get to the point.” “Aye soooo, we got a situation brewin’ up in the lil’ Washington, oooh yeah. You gotta take care of this ASAP. Ya see, they found these shiny rocks fallin’ out of the sky and it looks like your ring, if you catch my drift.”
“Right, so why isn’t NASA leading this operation?” “HMmmmmm uh, remember those budget cuts?” “I see.” “And while I love my guys in camo, they ain’t got the brain cells like your eggheads do, ooohh nooo.” “Fine, I’ll dispatch my team in the pacific northwest immediately-” “Oh no sister! You’re goin’ to pack your bags too!” “What!? Why?” “Cuz I noticed yer always sitting on your ass in that chair for years and I think you’re forgettin’ what it’s like to be one of your men, grandma.”
“My way of running things does not hold any relevance to the situation and for the last time; stop calling me grandma. I have a codename, Eagle, use it. ”
“It does more than you think chica, with somethin’ this big, I don’t think you should skimp on it. Plus, it’s the big Eagle’s orders so ya got no choice ya hear me?” She groaned, “…Understood sir.”
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reineyday · 1 year
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imagining a billy & max role reversal au where billy is max's feral little brother who only loves one (1) person and it is his older sister who stepped in when no one else would
#rei rambles#stranger things#billy hargrove#max mayfield#like im thinking she didnt know at first but since billy's younger it's harder for him to hide it#when max gets confirmation in front of her one day--neil shoving him against the wall by his neck#for hanging with the wrong sorts of people--max steps in right away and ends up taking the beating.#they run away but eventually get caught and this is why neil moves them out to hawkins.#at first all they did was argue and yell at each other even as they were running away but billy saw that she not only cared#but unlike his mother she wasnt going to leave. in fact she was leaving her *own* mother for *billy*.#(the plan was to try to get the both of them to max's dad but they never got there.)#their road trip to hawkins is fraught but also has this tense sort of understanding of respect#and there exists a ride-or-die vibe to them that didnt exist before.#(btw max has a camaro bc she needed a car and took billy as some sort of parent-mandated bonding trip and billy chose the car.)#by the time all the upside down stuff happens billy's gotten to the point where he'd step in front of his dad's fists for max if he had to#like he used to do for his mother before she left. because he's starting to trust that max wont leave.#(also yes this is an au where the party is all teenagers and steve & co are the kids lol. el escapes as a teen and she's MUCH angrier.)#anyways this all leads to max with a baseball bat with nails in it in a junkyard and her tiny brother trying to get in between her and#a demodog lol. they yell at each other about it. billy is also the type to step in front of her when he doesnt trust someone and growl.#max is exasperated and annoyed and always berates him for it bc seriously she doesnt need protecting ESPECIALLY from tiny shitheads#but she's secretly a little fond about it too. just a little.#at one point they have a fight bc billy's like 'youre not my MOTHER you cant REPLACE HER' and max is like#'GOOD I DONT WANT TO BE YOUR MOM IM YOUR FUCKING SISTER' but billy will admit years and years later that she raised him.#she also clocks billy pulling steve's pigtails right away in the junkyard haha.#btw i imagine she's actually just borrowing the nail bat from lucas. mike is the one that shoots guns.#jonathan is the one that gets lost in the upside down with will trying to find him.#steve and nancy still date and break up but it's less angsty and more funny bc they're middle schoolers lol.#max to steve (secretly rooting for billt's crush): and she wouldnt stop talking about jonathan?? dump her ass!#also steve grows up less of a shithead too bc he ends up sideways involvwd through nancy through mike when nance gets nosy and finds a#superpowered teenager hiding in her basement. this somehow ends with dustin adopting steve haha.
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theamazingannie · 5 months
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Fun thing about cleaning my room is I’ll find something I was using like a week ago buried deep under my bed in a pile of old receipts and candy wrappers and then also find something I haven’t seen in MONTHS like right there sitting exposed on the floor
#don’t understand this#Im so close to getting this room the most organized that it’s been since I moved in a year ago#but i gotta clean the junk out from underneath my bed and somehow that’s worse than everything else I’ve done#all motivation i had last week as disappeared this week#but i got a new shelf set up to put stuff that was laying around the floor on#i got my books all neatly lined up on the bookshelf I’ve had for months but had only put random junk on instead#got my earrings all sorted and put away except the ones missing their twin#which are set aside until they are matched#finally hung up my whiteboard calendar and got the dates down#not that I have anything going on I really need a calendar for lmao#but It’s magnetic so i departed it with some magnets and now I actually have some decoration in here aside from my eras poster#all my clothes are organized and anything I don’t wear is put in bins for me to shove against the wall#until they can hopefully one day be put in storage#for me to have when I hopefully one day move out and actually have use for party clothes#after a whole year of being in this room it actually feels lived in rather than just a storage room with a futon#It’s still half a storage room but it’s also now half me#unfortunately my shelf is cheap and the hooks can’t bare the weight of my jackets even with gorilla tape#so this weekend I gotta try to figure out what to do about that#need something stronger to support the weight#or maybe just more gorilla tape lol#anyways not that anyone is reading this but it is 3am and I can’t sleep so I decided to clean#but i think I’m just gonna read#or maybe play the sims#or maybe continúe to sit ln the floor mindlessly scrolling through tumblr
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is this actually that uncommon? I don’t even unpack just the DAY I return from somewhere, but it’s literally the first thing I do. I do nothing else until I’m unpacked, I have everything organized back in it’s proper place in the house within an hour of getting home lol.. I thought this was typical??? What’s the cultural norm?
#same with groceries or anything else I;m bringing home from outside -  i put it away or d o soemthing with it immediately#I just don't like looming tasks in the background taking up my mental space like 'oh i still have to do that later' etc.#I can't relax until everything is taken care of. If i try to relax or rest when I just got home from a trip there's just always the nagging#sense that I'm going to have to get up and do something else LATER (put the stuff away) so why not just do it now#It's the whole principle of 'be more uncomfortable in the present in order to help yourself in the future'#Samme thing with covid like. Follow the social distancting tules and wear masks and do everything extremely dillignently NOW no matter how#annoying or inconvenient it is at the MOMENT because the future pay off will save you more discomfort later (more vairants coming out - long#er lockdowsn because of wider spread - you or your family getting sick - etc.)#I am ALWAYS willing to inconvenence myself and ''suffer'' temporarily in the present if it will help my future self or get me a larger#benefit down the line. etc. etc. But to me that just seems like.. literally the only rational thing to do#what's more important? my temporary emotional satisfaction or my long term wellbeing ? always the long term#it might feel good to just come home and flop onto the floor and shove the suitcases aside but is that like hour or so of rest worth#the annoyance later when you realize you've still got to put everyhting up and now you REALLY don't feel like it and etc. etc. ?#just save your future self the trouble and get it out of the way#But again I just thought it's like... everyone would also do that??? If not then when do you unpack? days later???#Kind of like how in childhood I still had a lot of issues (hadn't developed cognitive empathy really at all - no affective empathy - don't u#nderstand social cues well or people at all - etc.. which is a recipe for frustration when Living In A Society since people are always#doing things you don't understand and you struggle to communicate properly or be understood like everyone's just speaking a different langua#ge than you) and worse anger problems and there were a few times I would come home from shcool or something and just freak out and#knock my shelves in my room over and break things or etc - and it's like OKAY that feels fine in the moment but.. consider the aftermath!#now I have to spend like a whole fucking hour cleaning my room and putting everyhting back together and etc. etc. and it's like a negative#feeling on top of a negative feeling. not only am I still kind of mad but now I have EXTRA work to do when I just want to go to sleep#So in a more minor way it's the same thing like.. If I feel shitty from traveling I don't want to DOUBLE the shitty by having extra stuff to#do later and some task looming over my head. I want to get all the bad out of the way first so I can just have uninterrupted peace later lol#if that makes sense? idk lol#The one exception is once recently I had been somewhere and got legit heat exhaustion and was throwing up by the time I got home so#I didn't unpack everything then. But after cooling off and having pedilyte and stuff I still shakily unpacked before I went to bed lol
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'cause i need to hear the rest of the wild uncle story, you may get more questions... 👀
18 & 26
18. Ever cheated on a test?
Nope! I was way too scared. One time I wanted to write the formulas on a tiny piece of paper and bring it to a math test but I was too afraid of getting caught.
26. Have you ever won a contest?
Nope! Not once! My sister has won tickets to two concerts, a comedy show, engagement photography, and a piece of creepy Saint art at a church raffle. I have never won anything. But I did buy a lottery ticket and maybe I'll win 60 million who knows!
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