#but eh you know how this goes | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lovesickeros · 5 months

Text

☆ even the gods bleed [ pt 4 ]

{☆} characters arlecchino, furina, lyney {☆} notes cult au, imposter au, multi-chapter, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings blood {☆} word count 3.7k {☆} previous [ 1 ] [ 2 ] [ 3 ]

Fontaine was bathed in darkness, not even the moon daring to illuminate where the common man fears to walk. The streets were bleak and empty save for the constant, rhythmic ticking and clanking of machines marching on endlessly, dauntlessly wading where even the bravest dared not to venture. Not even the sharp click of the Gardes boots followed the occasional hisses of steam as they walked the barren streets.

It was haunting, and it'd been like that for days now. It showed little signs of stalling in the slightest, too. Every inch of Fontaine was practically crawling with Gardemeks– like a swarm of rats skittering about.

Arlecchino had secluded herself in the Hotel Bouffes d'ete for days at this point, waiting– biding her time. Her nails clicked against the wood as she tapped at the table in a stilted rhythm, the subtle click of the clock mixing into the clanking outside, weaving in and out of earshot as the patrols slipped by. She reached forward after a moment of thought, reaching for the white king.

She leaned back against the chaise, tilting her head just enough to catch a glimpse of a patrol of Gardemeks as they vanished behind the rows and rows of buildings. It wasn't enough to keep her attention for long, however, her features twisting in disinterest as she glanced back to the chessboard– and the letter neatly resting beside it. The seal was unmistakable and a sobering sight, demanding her attention– the soft hues of blue etched into the shape of a dragon stared back at her in a way that almost unsettled her.

She had already parsed through it's contents hundreds of times, but she was met with only vague, flowing script that only served to irritate her more then anything– it filled the page top to bottom yet managed to say nothing at all. Her hand reached out again, but instead of reaching for the letter she plucked the black rook from the board, setting it down with a soft click.

Arlecchino had all the time in the world to sit back and observe her prey, but all that time would be useless if she lacked the information to act.

And he was quite tight fisted about it, evidentially. None of her inquiries or attempts to decipher any potential codes in the letter left her empty handed. She could not act without even knowing the reason for his summons– it was almost worded like a personal affair rather then one would expect for a foreign diplomat. In truth, she'd expected a scalding report on her operatives, but it lacked any mention of anything of the sort.

She was no stranger to people masking hostility behind pretty words and compliments, not that it was ever unwarranted per se– the Fatui did not create connections through honesty and genuine kindness. They have strong armed more then their fair share of people into cooperation to the point distrust is all the Fatui are met with outside of Snezhnaya. Every word was meant to conceal the deceit, every action meant to conceal the price later paid.

So she had been..skeptical of the letter, to put it lightly. She doubted the Iudex of all people would offer a hand to the Fatui without a price attached– a trap, perhaps, meant to lure in the most powerful piece left on the board. Her eyes narrowed, reaching for a white rook and moving it to the right.

Or he was hiding something. Something that he simply couldn't risk getting out to anyone, not even the Divine themself. A tempting prize, whatever it was.

..A dangerous prize, too.

She'd considered burning the letter and forgetting it all together– the risk was great, and she couldn't risk getting caught up by whoever else the Iudex may have on his side of the board. But she could hardly pass up the challenge and the prize that he fought so hard to keep from prying eyes and ears. Even her agents came back empty handed each time. She lazily picked up a black rook, sliding the white pawn aside.

"Lyney," Arlecchino drawled, crossing one leg over the other and turning her gaze to the door as it slowly creaked open. The pale visage of Lyney stepped through, though his siblings were noticeably absent. The weariness that weighed down on his shoulders was apparent in the slightest furrow of his brows and the subtle creak of leather as he clenched his fists behind his back. "Father." He choked out, the title dragged out by the sharp inhale and shaky exhale.

He looked out of breath, she noted.

The silence that lingered after the small exchange was punctuated only by the click of another chess piece being moved. She sets aside the black rook, letting it sit among the dozen other pieces that had been wiped off the board. She can see the conviction glinting beneath the fog of exhaustion, but if he would utilize it was another matter all together.

He had seemed to make his choice quickly, at the very least.

"Our contacts and operatives within the Fortress of Meropide have gone silent– all we have is their final confirmed missive.." His voice is confident, but it is rigid as the words spill from his lips. He takes a sharp step forward, unfolding his arms from behind his back and opening his hands– the small, water stained and messily folded note catches her eye, plucking it from his palms with a half hearted interest. "They believe the Duke left the Fortress of Meropide..and that he may be coming to the Court of Fontaine."

Her eyes narrow dangerously, nearly crumpling the thin paper in her hands– yet just as quickly, she collects herself.

But she cannot get rid of the bitter taste on her tongue, lingering as she sets down the note and slides it to the side, her lips pursed into a thin line.

So the Iudex had shown one of his pieces..she tightly grasps a black rook, tipping over the white rook, letting it roll against the board.

If the Duke was involved, things were much more complicated then she expected– he would be a problem, she was certain. She couldn't blame the lamb for fearing the wolf, either. Whether her agents had been killed or captured by the man mattered little. He had his ways, and he was a force that could instill fear in even them.

Which meant the possibility that her operation was already compromised was far too real.

What had the Iudex so concerned he had gone through the trouble of bringing in the Duke and herself? The Fatui was one thing, but to specifically request one of it's Harbingers..

The Prophecy? The thought had her clenching her fist, but..no. If it were to rear it's head now, the Iudex could simply not afford to waste time on his contacts deciphering his nonsensical script– If the prophecy were to be the issue, there time would be limited to mere minutes in the worst of cases. Which meant it was worth biding his time in order to ensure absolute secrecy.

So if not the prophecy, then what?

Her next moves were..limited. She was already walking on eggshells considering her position and the reputations of the Fatui– especially with a Harbinger in the midst. If they caught wind of her operations, they'd weed out her operatives and be on guards for any snakes that lingered in their garden.

She reached for the chessboard again, picking up one of the white rooks from the board with a scowl. The sharp click as she sets down the white rook and sets aside the black pawn draws a shaky inhale from Lyney as she moves another black pawn, the dull click of the pieces drowning out the distant clinking of machines.

..A draw, perhaps.

The pieces were all falling into place– the players of this game were slowly being revealed. Whether she could secure her victory..she was unsure.

She wasn't even sure who her opponent was. Only that the Iudex himself was but another piece in their game.

Arlecchino reached for the board again, yet this time she hesitated. Perhaps she could still swipe the win from beneath them, if she played her cards right.

She would simply have to capture the king– or, if need be, let it end on a draw. Either way, she would not concede. She could not afford to concede. Down to the last piece, she would drag out this match until she was in a position to force their hand into the outcome she desired.

She stood slowly, picking up the king piece and observing it for only the briefest of moments before she set it down on the table, taking measured steps around the table and across the room. She was hunting a much more dangerous quarry today– it would be no simple runaway traitor this time.

"Do you remember the directive?" She inquired coldly, her hand lingering on the door for that long, tense moment. "..Yes, Father." Lyney faltered, taking a hesitant step back and bowing at the waist. "Then do not stray."

All that was left was the silence and click of the door shutting behind her as she disappeared down the hall, her boots clicking harshly against the floorboards. The rest of the agents knew better then to linger in her path as she stepped down into the lobby, adjusting the cuffs of her sleeves. She barely even acknowledged the Fatui agent standing at the ready by the heavyset doors, their gloves hands held out with her cloak held loosely in their palms. She quickly snagged it from them, tugging it over her board shoulders and clasping it around her throat.

With a quick tug, she brought the hood up over her head to conceal her sharp features, lifting her hand and placing a neatly folded note within their waiting hands. She had only one chance to make the right moves and secure her victory– no matter the cost.

Each piece had it's purpose.

Oft, that purpose was a bloody and horrible end– but for the grand goal of the Fatui built on the backs of the dead, it was an honor.

She didn't bother speaking a word as she dismissed them with a wave of her hand, pushing open the heavyset doors and stepping out into the barren, damp streets. The rhythmic clink and whir of Gardemeks was still distant– she needed to move. Her boots clicked and splashed in the rain soaked stone of the streets as she slithered between the buildings, ducking through the openings in the patrols.

It was almost too easy.

She tilted her head back, taking in the towering Palais Mermonia with a scowl, her hands clenched into fists. The final moves were being played– the king was within her reach, yet she felt no more confident then when she began.

The air carried a sense of unease, thick and heavy, filling her lungs until she felt her breath still in her chest– listening to the empty, bleak night that seemed so..quiet.

She'd done her fair share of research, had more then her fair share of her agents try to peer into the Iudex's office or the Archon's supposedly hidden chambers, but every attempt was a failure. She had to give them credit, they were quite elusive when they wished to be. Though now she only thought about it bitterly– this was all a risky gamble, in the end, and only time would tell if it paid off.

With minimal effort, she'd managed to pull herself to the flat, tiled roof, eyeing the massive tower peaking out of the center cautiously. At least here the wandering patrols down below weren't likely to notice her..she could hear them passing by the spot she'd been in only a few minutes ago, just beneath her. She pulled the hood further over her face, peering through the sheer darkness of the night for any oddities, but it was almost impossible to see in the dark.

Her boots clicked softly against the tiles as she approached the tower jutting out from the Palais, her hand gliding along the smooth stone, pressing against odd indents or crevices. If it was for the Archon's chambers, she doubted they made it very difficult– she'd only met the woman once, but she doubted the Iudex make it all that complex just from a brief glance. And it surprised her little when one of the stones sunk into the wall, gears whirring as the walls split open to reveal a stairwell straight into an inky black hall. Only the barest hint of light peaked under the door at the bottom, but it's occupants must have heard her, considering it went out not a moment later.

She cautiously stepped down into the small crevice, her breath visible in the bitter cold air– her shoulders tensed at the subtle sound of muffled footsteps behind the door, her vision flaring with a molten heat between her shoulder blades as she reached for the worn handle of the door. The heat of her vision was enough to just barely heat the metal, her vision flaring like a quickly building inferno.

Arlecchino was prepared for a fight, if it came down to it.

The door creaked as she pressed against it, shoving it open with a grunt of effort and surveying the room with narrowed eyes and a biting remark on the tip of her tongue– the lavish opulence was expected, she supposed, but the lack of the towering figure of the Iudex was not.

Yet before she could get a word in or even take in her surroundings properly, the light flickered back on and she had to squeeze her eyes shut with a hiss at the sudden brightness. She could hear the door being shoved closed behind her, the hurried footsteps retreating just as quickly as her eyes adjusted to the light.

..This was a joke, wasn't it? It had to be.

She'd expected the Iudex, perhaps even the Duke if she'd been unlucky, not the Hydro Archon. She had half the mind to test her worth as an Archon then and there, her temper flaring like an uncontrollable blaze, barely kept at bay. It took all her self control to force herself to smile politely at the woman rather then snarl.

"Miss Furina," She sneered beneath her hood, x shaped pupils locked onto the startled, trembling Archon with thinly veiled contempt. "What a..pleasant surprise. You'll have to forgive my manners, I assumed I was meeting with the Iudex." She observed her body language carefully– the way her eyes darted about like a frightened rabbit seeking escape, the slightest tremble of her lips..

Arlecchino opened her mouth to offer another scathing remark, but her jaw audibly clicked shut as her entire body seemed to lock up. Even her vision went cold against her back, a chilling feeling creeping up her spine as someone, or something, crept up behind her. Their footsteps were almost silent, the slight rustling of their clothes the only thing she could hear over her heart pounding against her ribcage.

Arlecchino had always prided herself on being on the other end of that sensation– she was the monster, and her target was the prey frozen like a deer between the hunters crosshair.

It was a chilling feeling to have the dynamic shifted on it's head.

She couldn't even swallow, her jaw clenched so hard she could hear it creak as she tried to reason with her quickly splintering mind– a futile effort, her joints locking up almost painfully. Black spots were quickly swallowing her vision from the lack of air in her lungs, the sound of shuffling behind her barely audible over the ringing in her ears.

For a moment – a moment too long to have only lasted the seconds that it did, yet so quick it gave her whiplash – she thought she would hit the floor dead before she could even glimpse her assailant.

And then it was gone. She came crashing back into reality with a startled inhale, her lungs burning and her knees nearly buckling under her. The instinct to lash out and kill whoever had done it was intense, yet she couldn't bring herself to move even a finger– it would be so easy to twist around and ignite them with searing flames, but her feet were rooted in place.

She almost didn't notice the surprisingly gentle hands unclasping her cloak, tugging it off her shoulders, if not for the sheer intensity of the presence still lingering behind her. Her mind was still fractured, struggling to right itself after the ordeal, and it had her seething.

"..Are you certain you held back enough?" Furina croaked, the normally soft lilt raspy and almost hoarse. "Not– not that I doubt your capability, most Divine!"

Arlecchino felt her nails dig harshly into her palms, heat swelling beneath her skin– Divine? Had she lost her mind? The Divine was..

The Divine was upon their throne where they belonged. She'd seen them!

"Hm. Well, maybe? Sorry, I didn't think it'd affect you too." Their voice was sickeningly soft as they stepped around her like she wasn't even there, focusing their attention on the Archon who seemed more then delighted about it. "What gave you that impression, most Divine? Aha, I..was completely unaffected, as you can see! Perfectly fine."

Furina let out a small squeak when they pinched her cheek, but the almost affectionate smile that tugged at their lips revealed the lack of malice behind the action.

"You're a bad liar, Furina. You might want to sit down..please?" They didn't take her protests for an answer, gently pushing her to sit on the bed before abruptly turning to face Arlecchino once more, a forced smile on their lips. "Oh, good, you're..uh, not dead. That's good. I thought I fried your brain. Sorry?"

..Had she hit her head on the way here? The Divine should still be on their throne, yet she couldn't shake the weight of their stare– it felt tangible. She felt like she was standing face to face with the stars– galaxies and constellations bearing down upon her.

She grit her teeth and clenched her hands until she felt the sting of her nails against her palms, grounding herself in the pain through the sheer overwhelming nature of their existence.

"You.." She croaks, reaching out with a shaky hand and grabbing them by the collar of their shirt, lifting them up until their feet left the floor– she pays no mind to the startled protests of the Archon. Arlecchino would crush her like a bug before she even got the chance to intervene and they both knew it. "You shouldn't exist– you aren't them, and yet you..you're the imposter, aren't you?" Her grip tightens yet they face her without an ounce of fear, meeting her unyielding glare with a pondering look.

Arlecchino wanted to make them bleed just to see if she could, the urge to sink her teeth into skin welling up in her chest to the point she visibly snarled, her mask of politeness long . "You're the imposter." Her expression falls for a moment before she schools it into one of apathy, setting them back down and holding them there for a moment, finally releasing them after a tense moment. "Or you were supposed to be."

Hers brows furrow– she wants to demand answers, to throttle them for damning them to being nothing more then dolls for the supposed Divine to break at their whim, but none of the words come to her.

"..Why now? The current Divine has been in power for years, yet you descend now?" Her shoulders tensed, lips pursed into a thin line– it's impossible to ignore the truth that lay before her. The Divine is a fraud and this..imposter is the true Divine. How many years had they been in power, now? How many years were they waiting? Why did they wait? Was the suffering of Teyvat not enough? Was the blood that painted the steps of their stolen throne not enough?

She'd personally been on the wrong end of the Divine's wrath– she wonders..had they watched? Had they seen the cruel hand of their imposter and turned their back on Teyvat?

"I.." They hesitated. It made her seethe, her hands clenching into fists at her sides– her vision flickered, flames swelling within it's casing just to be smothered by the presence of the Divine. But once that spark had been lit, she refused to let it go out. "I didn't know."

The answer does not satisfy her. There is an itch beneath her skin that she cannot scratch, a fire that burns in her chest so hot it scorches even herself.

"And what about now? Are you content to cower like prey in the safety of the Palais Mermonia?" She snapped, taking a step forward, her brows furrowed and her glare intense– she can see the slightest bit of worry in their eyes. She revels in it. "Will you let them use your acolytes like pawns? How many more need to be broken on the steps to your throne before you act?"

Again, her vision flares and dims– it refuses to be used against the Divine that created it.

"Have you no answer?"

The room is silent. They do not speak and neither does she.

Even the world itself seems to quiet in the face of her accusations, fury boiling to the surface so hot it incinerated all it touched.

"I will kill them myself."

Their words are quiet, but they are not soft– there is a vindictive, searing anger that explodes out like dying stars within their eyes. The sight of constellations replaced by a void that would not be . The smell of ichor grows stronger– to the point she feels almost lightheaded.

"..I am aware that I have failed in preventing this, but I had no choice in the matter. Still," They muse, their voice like the tolling of bells. A solemn melody that stills the swelling fury burning in her chest, if only for a moment. "I will rectify it– I will tear down their throne of lies and let not even the earth tarnish itself by burying their corpse among it's soil."

They pause for a moment, holding out their hand– scarred and bandaged by the weapons of the devout, yet still they take upon the burden of dirtying their hands to save those who did not save them.

"Do you trust me, Arlecchino?"

Did she?

"Will you help me?"

She exhales heavily, meeting the starry iris' of the Divine with a scowl still tugging at her lips. Arlecchino trusted no one but herself.

"..Yes."

#sagau #genshin sagau #self aware genshin #genshin impact sagau #self aware genshin impact #fic tag #imposter au #genshin cult au #genshin impact cult au #arlecchino #lyney #furina #you do NOT wanna know what i got put thru writing this fic #trying 2 find out where arle was in the few times we DO see her and going down a rabbit hole of fuck fontaine and its layout actually!#I spent like 3 hours looking it up and checking in game it gives me a migraine thinking abt it. ew #anyway trying to write a really smart character is surprisingly difficult when ur as dumb as rocks #also used an actual chess match for this and gave myself an even worse migraine trying 2 make sure i didnt repeat moves or smth #furina doesnt get a spotlight yet just imagine her sitting in the corner trembling like a wet kitten you found on the side of the road #arlecchino goes thru a crisis more at 11 #shes a tired single dad shes isnt getting paid enough for this okay #hands u a fic over half the length of the other THREE PARTS #ehe :]#is arle actually on ur side??? is she gonna double cross u???? who knows!!!!!#shes unpredictable she might stab u for funsies #anyway im gonna go nap in a ditch now this took SO LONGGGGG OH MY G-D #also just think acolytes who arent buddy buddy w reader and even resent them is so tasty #bc how r they supposed 2 know reader was a human vibing 5 minutes before their got eebied 2 teyvat..#reader gotta roll up their sleeves and get 2 WORK sometimes murder IS okay #they gotta fix some shit around here and that means committing several crimes all at once. sometimes more #a group can be g-d (just got here) their dragon (neuvi) their cat (archon) their dog (wrio) and their wolf (arle)

367 notes · View notes

tswwwit · 2 years

Text

And here's Bill vs Bill, aka the Pinnacle of Billmei vs Billge's Faceoff, part three. Not the finale, but that's coming very soon!

I am now going to go lie down and take a nap.

-------------------

“You’re not gonna get what you want,” Bill says.

“Thanks.” Dipper had guessed that part five minutes ago. He rubs at the bridge of his nose. “Really great to know.”

He stares across the bare dirt in front of him. The sigils are scrawled on with a stick - he didn’t have anything else on hand - and he wasn’t expecting company.

Company he’s currently trying to ignore.

“I had to say something! You’re terrible at this.” From the side of the clearing, Bill snorts. “You need all the help you can get.”

Commentary from Bill never fails to be unhelpful. For the first time in a while, Dipper finds himself genuinely, unflirtingly irritated by it. Tension has been building in his shoulders for the last day and a half and they’re starting to ache.

Bill Cipher lounges on a stump nearby. Seated in a way that couldn’t possibly be comfortable for a normal human, but has the appropriate level of drama for a demon.

He’s spent most of the last half-hour mocking Dipper’s futile scribblings in the dirt. An unwelcome interloper, in multiple senses.

Ditching this Bill to go experiment in the forest has been a total loss. All Bills are smart, and for all that this one knew so little about their situation - still doesn’t - he’s somehow latched onto being able to locate Dipper, easy as anything.

“Do you mind?” Dipper reels on him.

“Often, as you know!” Bill shrugs that off with a grin. “C’mon, you need me for this!” He adds a slow, unsubtle wink. “Besides, all our other stuff worked out!”

Dipper makes a disgusted sound, and hears Bill start to chuckle.

The one good thing about interacting with demons? Is that Dipper doesn’t have to pretend to be nice.

Even though Bill doesn’t have the entire picture, he’s clever, and he can make inferences. All of Dipper’s reactions have shown him that this human’s not servile. It’s just enough to accept it as par for the course.

He knows that Dipper knows he’s a demon - but not that Dipper knows about demons, and how they do… stuff. As far as this Bill’s aware, the non-flirtatious insults are just how they interact. That Dipper, of course, wouldn’t know that some other ones have… implications.

There’s no reason they would be flirty, anyway. He thinks they’re just -

Buddies.

God, Dipper hopes his Bill won’t learn about that part. It adds another layer to the joke, and not one that works in Dipper’s favor.

Dipper breathes in, then out. Trying to relax, though his back and shoulders aren’t cooperating.

He looks back at the interdimensional asshole and asks. “Why are you here?”

“What, did you think I wouldn’t show up?” Bill rests a hand on his chest, a near-perfect picture of surprised innocence. “Like you’d get rid of me that easy..”

Dipper tries not to grit his teeth. He stomps deliberately on the ground as he turns away.

“C’mon,” Bill’s voice is coy and almost cloyingly sweet, in a way that makes Dipper want to spit. “All this dimensional stuff you’re looking at. All that curiosity,” A tinge of something else enters his tone. There’s a soft pat, probably in his lap. “I got all the knowledge, right here! Why not enjoy it?”

Dipper picks up the stupid stick he was using to draw his stupid improvised signs into the dirt. He scrapes down a few more, simply out of spite.

He looks like a six-year old playing at being a magician, not a real one - but it’s better than letting Bill win.

For the second time ever, Dipper Pines has the dubious honor of being the focus of a Bill Cipher’s intense interest.

It’s mostly because of his world-conquering plots, of course. Somewhat because Bill’s learned that this dimension comes with… extras, he guesses. Not that he’s getting any use of them. And partly because…

Okay, Dipper’s not sure what the rest is, but Other Bill has a way of leading down tangents that Dipper would, in any other instance, pursue. He’s had to not argue a surprising number of times.

Dipper won’t let this guy drag him into some coquettish debate over…. leyline geometry, or anything else. Even if it’s tempting. Dipper’s dug in his metaphorical heels, because being led down that road can’t end well.

Maybe Dipper’s home dimension has something in the air, or… ether or whatever. An ephemeral thing that turns a Bill extra weird, because this doesn’t seem like it’s ‘universal’.

The alternative would be that this is kind of multiversal, and that would mean -

Dipper grimaces.

Demons are dangerous. Bill’s the worst of them.

Luck…. wouldn’t always run in Dipper’s favor, he thinks.

For the sake of his remaining sanity, he’s decided not to think too hard about it.

“If you want results, you should be working with my information, not whatever crapshoot you have going on in your noggin.” Bill adds, rather pointedly pointing to the papers he tossed on the ground. They’re spread out in a loose pile, even when he could have neatly stacked them. “Take my word for it!”

Dipper doesn’t have a good response. He shrugs instead.

The wind blows gently through the clearing, and Bill makes a face as some of the pages get caught. He raises an eyebrow. Jerks his head towards them, with a smirk.

And fuck that.

There’s no way Dipper’s going to rifle through that mess, much less chase after it. He has some dignity, and this Bill would just love watching him scrabble through the dirt for scraps of information. Dipper refuses to entertain him. Hell, he wouldn’t do that even for his own Bill.

And second -

That information is absolutely, 100%, a poison pill. A trick.

A little over thirty years ago, Bill Cipher - a Bill Cipher - nearly led Stanford Pines into ruining an entire dimension. The only reason he got caught was because Ford, in pure academic diligence - noticed something very, very subtly out of place.

Ford might be oblivious to personal interactions - but he’s downright incredible when it comes to scholarship. Even then Bill nearly tricked him into a cascade failure of literally disastrous proportions.

So yeah, Dipper’s smart. And maybe he is getting pretty okay at the dimensional stuff. But he’s barely getting into this field.

He knows way better than to think any Pines is going to get that lucky, twice.

It’s pretty clear he’s already used up his own.

Behind him, Dipper hears Bill starting to ramble on about something. This time with a tinge of annoyance in his tone.

Out of the corner of his eye Dipper can see the pages caught on some bushes. Wherever the rest are, he doesn’t care anymore.

And in front of him, Dipper sees his own futile scribblings leading… precisely nowhere.

No matter how perfectly the circle is drawn, or how his sigil handwriting is second to nobody’s, it’s basically as good as Ford’s -

He just…

Doesn’t know what he’s doing.

The only person who really, truly knows exactly what to do is out of reach.

There’s a copy around, sure. Right down to the intelligence, personality, and name. Even the face is downright familiar, though the expressions it wears are strange.

Dipper swallows. His mouth feels dry.

There’s so much information to learn, infinite piles of it, offered up on a silver platter.

And none that he can trust.

“What’s with the face?” Bill sounds cheerful, though Dipper can hear the tension behind it. Other Bill isn’t getting his way, and it’s annoying him. “Frustrated? Struggling?” He claps a hand on Dipper’s shoulder, and his voice turns that syrup-smooth tone that Dipper hates - “Between you and me, we could-”

“No world-conquering.” Dipper shrugs away from the touch on his shoulder. That’s it. He’s done. “Ever.”

“Whoa, whoa, who said anything about that? I-”

“Save it for the suckers, Bill.” Dipper turns on him, backing up a step - but not far. “I never bought it in the first place.”

Other Bill looks at him with… mild confusion. But that’s only what shows on his face. By the way his head tilts, and his shoulders set - Dipper can tell he’s thinking, fast.

This Bill knows he’s been caught at something - and he’s equally sure he can talk his way out of it.

Dipper can’t work his way around Bill’s magical trickery. Even if he could, that’d take years, maybe decades of study. And all the while, he’d have to be lucky enough to avoid the many, many landmines that Other Bill would place in his way.

That’s not going to happen. Probability isn’t on Dipper’s side, he’s never going to learn enough to stop whatever this demon is planning.

But he does know Bill.

His thoughts. His motives. His emotions, too. Even when he tries to hide them, Dipper can almost always find out what he’s really feeling. This might be a different version, but Dipper still understands this creature right down to -

Well, not his bones - the few Bill has are at best non-euclidean - but Dipper gets the majority of what’s underneath his exoskeleton.

So, fuck it. Last resort.

Dipper just… asks.

“Where is he?”

“Where’s who?” Other Bill cocks his head to one side. His face flickers into an expression of not-quite concern. “You’re-”

“No.” Dipper cuts through the air with his arm. Frustration is tight in his chest. “I said I’m done playing.”

“Yeesh, you’re testy today.” Other Bill taps his foot on the ground, shaking his head. “Figures, what with all the sleep you’re not having.”

And god, comments on that have always been annoying, even from Real Bill.

“Nice try. Sure, you’re a Bill,” Dipper stomps forward. Jabbing a finger into Other Bill’s chest, and giving him his second-worst glare. “But you’re not my Bill. And I’m tired of pretending that you’ve,” He makes finger quotes. “‘Fooled’ me.”

Bill blinks at that, for a full two seconds. ”Who says I’m-”

“That won’t get either of us anywhere.” Dipper interrupts. He runs a hand through his hair. Being angry isn’t going to work, so he tamps it down. He has to make this convincing. “We should… get you back to your place.”

Other Bill watches Dipper for a long, lingering moment.Then he lets out a long, low whistle. Shaking his head again, he takes Dipper by the shoulders. “Aaand it’s naptime for Pine Tree!” Bill strides forward, pushing Dipper along. “Boy, have you been working too hard! All this dimension stuff has really gone to your head if you’re coming up with something that crazy.”

Now Dipper digs his literal heels into the ground - something Other Bill wasn’t expecting, apparently - and manages to tear himself out of Bill’s grip. He folds his arms over himself, backing up a few steps.

Bill huffs out a sigh. “Seriously?”

“Yeah.” Dipper folds his arms over his chest. “Seriously.”

“C’mon, we’ve known each other for years!” Other Bill spreads his arms wide. Deep concern furrows his brow, his voice softens. “You’re overthinking, kid. Maybe all this study isn’t good for you.” He beckons towards himself. “Let’s just get you-”

Dipper scoffs. It comes out almost like a laugh. Other Bill straightens up, a brief flicker of annoyance on his face.

Bill’s bullshit isn’t going to work. Not this time. Not on Dipper.

“If you were my Bill, you would know better.” Dipper lifts his chin. “If you were my Bill, you wouldn’t suggest that, or act like that, or…” He shakes his head. Other Bill barely did any research, and now he’s surprised he’s fucking up? “You’re really bad at this.”

A muscle in Other Bill’s jaw twitches. The rest of his face maintains the same, gentle concern. “You’re making a mistake, kid.” He sounds too calm - “If you were sane, you’d-”

“Oh, I’m not.” Dipper jabs a thumb into his chest. Almost proudly. “That’s how I know.”

Hell, Dipper gave up total sanity a long time ago. Once he realized what he’d gotten into. Once he realized he liked it.

“Huh.” Curiosity, apparently, overrides a Bill’s need to keep up a ruse, because he’s starting to smirk. “Never let it be said I don’t like insanity!” He tilts his head. “Enlighten me!”

Welp. He asked for it.

The smart thing to do would be to play nice. To work with this Bill, as much as is possible - to be flattering, and convincing, and massage that ego until he did want to cooperate, instead of obfuscate. It could even be easy.

But fuck this guy.

“Okay, so we’ll forget how you’re fucking up basic rules of this dimension, your obvious lack of knowledge,” Dipper starts. He rolls a hand in the air, in the way Bill does when he’s lecturing, and watches Other Bill’s eye twitch. “And how your acting sucks-”

Other Bill folds his arms over his chest. He starts tapping his fingers, in a slow, rhythmic beat. “More proof that you’re delusional, but sure!” He shrugs. “Why not!”

“You might have pulled it off in another world, but there’s too many details in this one.” Dipper admits. This dimension is pretty weird, if you think about it. He rubs the back of his neck, suddenly awkward. “We’re, uh…. Kinda out there.”

“A lotta suppostions, and zero facts.” Other Bill waves them away casually. “That’s hardly evidence.”

Dipper shrugs, almost casually. “No,” He says, very slowly. “I guess it isn’t.”

Other Bill starts to grin.

And Dipper shoves his left hand right in front of this smug asshole’s face. His palm - and its mark - on full display. “But this is.”

Other Bill violently recoils, letting out a sharp, startled swear in that strange language -

Then instantly realizes he’s blown his cover. He grimaces, hissing something else vulgar. Other Bill rubs at his eye, ducking his head.

Holy symbols don’t affect Bill, but that threw him right the hell off. A minor victory at best - yet oh, is it sweet.

Dipper waggles his hand in Other Bill’s view, and watches him turn away in disgust. “Well?”

Other Bill clapped a hand over his eye; now he draws it slowly down his face. “What. The hell. Is wrong with that guy? I thought the body was bad, but nah, that was just the beginning!” He shudders, shoulders rising. “There’s an entire conspiracy of awful.”

“Answer the question.” Dipper insists. The jig is up, the ruse is gone. Other Bill can’t lie his way out of this now. “Where is he?”

“Eesh, put it away already.” Other BIll flaps a hand at him. After a moment, Dipper reluctantly lowers his arm, while Other Bill sticks out his tongue. “Trust me - if you knew what that mark really meant, you wouldn’t be champing at the bit trying to find the other guy.” This… asshole.

He thinks Bill never told Dipper -

And okay, he didn’t, Stan had to point it out first -

But it’s like he thinks Dipper’s an idiot. That he doesn’t know exactly what he signed up for. That nobody would ever want to be -

Dipper takes a step forward, fists clenched tight by his sides. “Where’s my husband?”

Other Bill just. Looks at him. For a long moment, face blank and staring.

After a while, he slowly shakes his head. “I dunno what kinda demiurge got their tendrils into this particular space-time weave,“ Other Bill says carefully. Almost consideringly. “But boy, do they have a sick sense of humor. It’s almost impressive!”

“Oh, I get it.” Dipper ignores the distraction and folds his arms. This will get to him. “You don’t actually know. Do you?”

“Ha ha, very funny. Of course I know! We’ve been talking theory for days and you still haven’t guessed?” Other Bill waves his arm over the forest, vaguely skyward. “You see any big magical storms going on? Or any nice convenient rifts? No! Not even one! Things are still,” He curls up his lip as he makes finger quotes. “‘In balance.’”

And that kinda tracks. With what Dipper knows.

Passing into another dimension is difficult for a long, long list of reasons. At the core, it’s because they’re… mostly incompatible with each other.

The very fabric of reality keeps the planes apart, and healthy. Literally a skin between realms, since having different rules in place is like having a separate immune system. They can’t mix unless something is already compatible - or unless something’s gone terribly wrong.

But. Theoretically.

If you knew how. And if had the magical capital to pay the tolls - You could trade out an equal measure of mass, or magic. As long as it was similar enough, it might get overlooked.

And Bill Cipher’s a huge weight in the fabric of existence, simply out of sheer magical heft. Even if his realm is the Mindscape, he’s still linked to this dimension. If a nearby place suddenly had two Bills - or no Bills - there would be some major ripples in the fabric. Causing strange phenomena. Further anomalies.

But that didn’t happen. There was only one big surge, until everything sort of….

Evened out.

“So.” Dipper shuts his eyes, feeling suddenly exhausted. “He’s at your place.”

His Bill wasn’t randomly transported into the beyond. He hasn’t even gone all that far.

Somewhere out in the infinite multiverse - There was a triangular gap that he could slot right into.

“I guess you’re not totally slow.” Other Bill grins. Weirdly, he sounds pleased. “Yeah, it’s the ol’ switcheroo. Usually a decent time!” He heaves a heavy, dramatic sigh. “But I guarantee that guy’s having a way better day than I am.”

One mystery solved. Bill’s location. Relatively nearby, as these things go -

Dipper looks up, suddenly intent. “Bring him back.”

Other Bill raises an eyebrow.

“Just…” Dipper fumbles, he tries to wave vaguely in a dimension-adjacent direction, which ends up being everywhere. “I mean, we’ll reverse it, right? It-”

“Oh yeah? With what?” Other Bill snorts, and sets his hands on his hips. “I’m not sitting on infinite power and influence right now, kid.” He shrugs. “Even with that it takes a lot of finagling. No dice.”

Dipper leanis his head back.

Shit.

“But there’s good news!” Bill sounds surprisingly cheerful, and Dipper glances over - “Ripping a hole between realms is a hell of a lot easier with a native. And I don’t qualify, on several counts.” He tilts his head thoughtfully, starting to smirk. “You could really come in handy.”

Dipper simply stares.

Double shit.

“Hey, you’ve already worked with a Bill. A real messed up one.” Other Bill makes a face, glancing at Dipper’s left hand. “You wanna dick with dimensions, then you got a way better opportunity, right here.”

Dipper breathes in, then out. Right.

He… kind of figured it would come to this.

“Go fuck yourself.”

Other Bill gives him a surprised look. Dipper flips him off.

He’s had a lot of bad ideas in his life, but this is clearly the worst deal he’s ever been offered.

“What?” Other Bill has almost mastered the innocent look. “Don’t you wanna see your dear hubby again?” He tuts softly, resting a hand on his chest. “Poor guy might even,” He hesitates. Dipper thinks he’s trying not to gag. “‘Miss’ you!”

“Nice try.” Dipper waves it off, ignoring the slight pang in his chest. Asshole. Manipulative jerk. “But I know you didn’t leave your dimension just to sightsee.”

Other Bill’s face sours. Possibly the first genuine expression Dipper’s seen; it weirdly makes him look more like the real Bill -

“So. no.” Dipper looks away. Clearing his throat, once. “Not a chance.” He lifts his chin. “If you hate it here, that’s your problem.”

This demon might not have enough leverage, or magic, in this realm to pull it off - but he did say ‘Right now’.

Other Bill makes a low sound in his throat, so. Yeah, Dipper’s right. Again.

For this to happen in the first place. This strange and bullshit switch -

Someone had to start it.

“What was wrong with your place?” Dipper asks, because - okay, it’s dumb, but Bill loves talking. And hell, he’s always curious. “Too much competition?”

“Pfft, hardly! Kinda the opposite.” Other Bill flicks his fingers dismissively, then examines his nails. Starting to smile again, that ego bloating with pride. “I did that dimension already, y’know? All conquering, no contest.” He shrugs. “Can’t blame a guy for wanting a little novelty.”

Greedy jerk. One wasn’t enough for him. A second, like he’s obviously trying for - Dipper rubs at his eyes.

How many is ever going to be enough? Will there ever be? If his world’s Bill Cipher seems messed up, it’s only because all of them are.

“I’m your only chance, Pine Tree.” Other Bill has mastered the convincing tone. It’s almost a shame he’s wasting it on the wrong person. “How about you-”

Dipper flips him off. Both hands this time.

With a huff, Other Bill folds his arms. “Fine. Be like that.” He turns slightly away, looking disgruntled. “You’re a stubborn little mortal.”

“I didn’t help my husband take over the world.” Dipper mimics his stance. Turning away a bit himself. “I’m not lifting a finger to help you.”

God, he’s exhausted.

And damn it, now he’s going to have to get Ford to help. It’s going to be ten times more difficult, and way slower. Half of that will be convincing him that yeah, actually, they should try to get Bill back. Throw in whatever this Bill pulls in the Mindscape, and Dipper can already tell this is going to be a huge pain.

“Y’know, if there’s any upside to all of this,” Other Bill starts, slow. Dipper feels himself tense. “It’s that the other guy might make a recovery.”

“I-” Dipper hesitates.

This is a trick. Manipulation, Bill’s all about that - He grits his teeth. “There’s nothing wrong with him.”

“Oh, how cute. You’re fully delusional!” Other Bill’s tone turns syrup-sickly sweet. It makes Dipper grimace. “Guess other me pulled a great scam on ya! But I gotta tell you…” A slow, serious shake of the head. “He’s sick.”

That’s obviously not -

True?

Dipper meets Bill's eye and finds nothing but smug sincerity.

“Being back at my place will be great for him! All the power and influence and stuff you could ever want!” Other Bill spreads his arms at some invisible grandeur. “He’s spent too long in this body, being powerless. You think that’s good for a demon?” A raised eyebrow. “Even the slightest bit healthy?“

And… okay, Bill does spend a lot of time in reality - but he has the Mindscape - Dipper didn’t take that away, that - that has to -

“No wonder he came down with something! Without other people to manipulate, he had to let it out somewhere!” Bill shakes his head pityingly. “In all this time, the only trick he managed to pull - “ The smirk turns mocking - “Was convincing himself he wanted you.”

Sincere, still, though - maybe it’s just out of spite, that’s a major part of any Bill’s makeup - But. the way he says it -

Dipper doesn’t know what to say, he tucks an arm over his stomach.

For the first time in a while, he really, really wishes he knew less about Bills.

“Yep, I figure a few days of actual autonomy will get his angles straight.” Other Bill sets his fists on his hips, nodding to himself. “No gross body, no boring reality, and most of all - “ He snorts. “No ball and chain.”

Dipper stands up straight, indignant. “I-”

“Sure, you’ve got an okay brain, I guess.” A sharp, dismissive wave. Dipper feels his face heat up - was he looking? “But your guy’s spent about forty-eight hours getting a taste of real freedom.” A shrug, fingers waving away some invisible stink from Dipper’s hand. “Trust me. He’s already wondering why that seemed like a good idea.”

“He wouldn’t.” Dipper stands firm. No, fuck that. The marriage was Bill’s idea in the first place. “He-”

Dipper stops himself before he says something stupid, shutting his mouth with a click.

He can’t talk about the… other part.

That thing is true, too. Even though it sounds improbable. Impossible, in fact. It’s too weird, even for a Bill, and definitely too sane. No version of Bill should ever, or would ever do it.

Other Bill will only think it’s bullshit, and mock him for thinking there was a chance.

Dipper lets his arm drop. His fists clench.

He knows better.

“Oh, please. And people call me arrogant!” Other Bill stalks forward. “He's already forgotten you, kid. Think about it!"

Dipper doesn't back up - he won't give in, now or ever - but he holds back a flinch. Other Bill is right in his face, now.

"What's better - Infinite power, freedom, and control over a slice of the multiverse -” He hisses. Teeth bared white in his smile. “Or one mouthy little brat.”

Dipper meets that single, strange, and glowing eye. Not backing up, even an inch. He watches Other Bill’s sneer turn into a glare.

They’re so close that Dipper can feel the heat of that illusionary body, worn like an ill fitting suit by this… jackass.

Who’s also a complete, absolute idiot.

“If your place was so great, you wouldn’t have ditched it.” Dipper states, watching Other Bill blink in surprise. Dipper sets his jaw. “So yeah. I think I know what he’d pick.”

No snappy response - Other Bill’s caught off his footing.

For once, shoving a Bill with all his strength actually makes him back up a step. Dipper straightens his back, suddenly proud.

“This universe already has a Bill Cipher. Yeah, maybe he hasn’t taken this plane over. Yet.” Or ever, but that’s a minor detail. “But he's a better actor. And smarter. And more vicious, and clever, and…” Saying all of this out loud feels strange. Sheer irritation carries Dipper onward, though he stumbles getting it out. “And funnier, and way cooler than you.”

Other Bill glares at him, but stays silent. The corner of his mouth twitches.

“In every way that counts, he’s better than you.” He stabs a finger into Other Bill’s chest with each word, back tense and face hot with anger. Stepping forward even as a part of him recognizes this might not be great - “You’re just some dull-witted, myopic knockoff.”

There’s a long silence.

Dipper heaves out a breath, trying to calm down. This was. - He shakes his head, disgusted.

“Alright.” Bill nods slowly, almost thoughtful. He lifts his hands in the air with a simple shrug. “I see how it is.”

A sudden crack sends Dipper reeling.

He hits the bare ground on his side, breath forced out of his chest.

When his vision comes back, Dipper stares numbly forward.

He's on the ground? His left eye doesn't want to stay open, and - and strangely, his ear is ringing, and moments later the pain blooms in his cheek and jaw. Sharp and throbbing all at once - a splitting headache follows it up a moment later, and Dipper groans. The light hurts his eyes - the one that’s cooperating anyway - so he shuts it.

There’s a muffled sound, and Dipper feels a hard impact on his side, a voice hissing, “-et up.”

This time Dipper rolls onto his back, breath escaping in a huff. Above him, BIll’s standing and smirking, one hand extended downward. Dipper reaches up to take it.

And the crushing grip, tight around his wrist, sends pain down his arm and the sharp, sick reminder that. Oh. Right.

This isn’t his Bill

“You,” Other BIll says, grip tightening - Dipper groans, teeth clenched - “Have been spoiled rotten.”

He hauls Dipper up. High up -

Bill raises him until his feet barely skim the ground. Suspended like this, his whole arm aches, shoulder wrenched upwards -

“Funny thing, though.” Other Bill muses, cupping Dipper’s chin in his other palm. “Maybe I can’t coax you-” His thumb digs, hard, into Dipper’s cheek, and a burst of pain sends Dipper’s vision swimming again. “But one good swat and you’re way less mouthy!”

Dipper can’t pull away, he can’t even find his feet. Grabbing Bill’s arm makes his grip tighten into something sickening, he thinks he feels a crack - kicking out only puts more tension on his already aching arm, twisting it in the socket.

“Still feisty, huh?” Other Bill tuts softly. Then smirks. He tilts Dipper’s head back. “Now that I know how to handle ya, that's no big deal.”

Bill’s body is unnaturally strong, and he wasn’t pulling the blow. Through a kind of haze, Dipper’s faintly glad Bill went for a slap over a punch. He’s hurting, it’s hard to concentrate - but he doesn’t think his jaw is broken.

More than anything, Dipper wants to glare, but he can’t lower his chin. He can’t tense his jaw to speak, either. Bill’s thumb burns into his cheek like a brand, a point of stabbing pressure.

“Aw, what’s the matter?” Other Bill shakes Dipper’s face roughly, like a dog worrying a bone. “Not got much to say anymore?”

“Ghnnn.” Not… much of a protest. Best he did was bare his teeth, and the throbbing in his head is twice as bad now - Dipper shuts his mouth before he can make a stupider sound.

Weirdly, this Bill starts grinning even harder.

“Boy, you got some fire in you, Pine Tree. And y’know what?” Bill tilts his head to one side. He chuckles, grinning wider. “I almost see why he didn’t try to snuff it out!”

Other Bill swings him lightly, side to side, before giving him a toss.

Dipper hits the ground again, hard. He props himself up, only to find one wrist won’t support his weight and swears. Sitting up turns from a simple move into an awkward scuffle.

The whole time, Other Bill watches him, with a smirk on his face. Like he’s admiring his work.

Frustration surges in Dipper’s chest.

Pushing this guy into the Mindscape has moved from a ‘soon’ priority to a ‘now.’

There’ll be a chance. Once he stops being grabby. It has to be when he’s not holding on, or Dipper will get dragged along for the trip - and it’s not like things would get better after that.

Dipper takes a slow, shaking breath. “You’re not-”

Other Bill backhands Dipper with an idle smack. “Ah ah ah!” He wags a finger. “I’ve heard enough from you.”

Dipper’s elbow hits the ground, his vision swims. That slap wasn’t as hard as the previous, probably. Just in the same-ish place, resonating with pain like a bell. Normally he’d have a followup, but nothing comes to him.

Damn it, he’s been through fights, more than a few at this point - but this one is messing with him.

“Despite everything, you could still be useful.” Bill says, low soothing. He kneels in front of Dipper, one elbow on his upraised knee. “Once I get this dimension under my thumb, it’s back to business!”

Dipper wipes at his mouth with the back of his hand. It comes away streaked with red.

“Work with me here! We could get the whole shebang started,” Other Bill continues, eye bright. “When I’m back in power, things are gonna be great.”

He holds out a hand.

Dipper stares at it.

“Infinite power. No more bullshit rules.” Leaning in, Other Bill smiles, white and wild. “Help me out, and I’ll even be generous!” He waggles his fingers. “When I control reality - you can have anything you want.”

Dipper looks up at… this Bill.

At a stranger, puppeting a familiar face.

It’s a face that Dipper knows so well.

Knowing when it’s happy. When it’s upset. When it’s about to burst out laughing, or starting to sulk. When it’s a different monster behind that mask - when it doesn’t have that hidden contempt behind it - it’s even handsome.

The distance between them is so close, and his husband’s still a million miles away.

Other Bill makes a low sound in his throat. Maybe he saw something in Dipper’s own face, because he slowly rises up.

“Anything,” Other Bills hisses out the words through gritted teeth. “Except that.”

Dipper grunts as Bill grabs him by his hair. He tries to jerk away, but he already has a headache, this just makes things worse.

“He’s outta here, kid. Vanished. Kaput!” Other Bill yanks him forward, and Dipper smacks a palm on the ground before the hold in his hair is the only thing supporting him. “He’s gone.”

Though Other Bill turns his head upwards - Dipper shuts his eyes.

“Face it, Pine Tree.” The low words ring in Dipper’s ear’s, and there’s hot breath on his face - “You’re stuck with me.”

Dipper’s been injured before - bruised, some burns, a broken bone - but it wasn’t like this. He knew Bill was strong, but it wasn’t supposed to hurt so bad.

He feels his head get shaken again. The grip is too tight - Dipper’s eyes are stinging, and frustration burns so hot in his chest that it feels almost physical.

The second this asshole lets go, he’s out of here. It doesn’t matter how long it takes, or how much Dipper has to work, he’s going to get rid of this jerk, and get his own jerk back. Even if it takes years. Even if it takes decades.

Anger surges inside him, and he struggles. When Dipper looks up at that horrible, smug laughter, he almost sees red in the corner of his eye.

Only…

Other Bill stops cackling.

He glances over to Dipper’s right and quirks an eyebrow up.

EIther that’s some complicated ruse, reading Dipper’s emotional state, maybe even what he’s seeing -

Or - now Other Bill lets him drop, stalking away, eye narrowed - it’s not.

Dipper glances over, and his own eyebrows shoot up.

Okay.

That's different.

Living in Gravity Falls shows you a lot of weird stuff, if you’re the kind of person who really wants to see it. Not many people get into the gritty details, or do a lot of research.

Dipper and Ford are probably the only two people who ever really got into it, and Ford’s not here all that often. That leaves Dipper to be the resident Gravity Falls expert.

This is one even he hasn’t seen before.

The glow isn’t a figment of his imagination, it’s real.

Real, and weird.

There’s a long, bright eggshell-crack in the middle of the air, glowing in shades of white-yellow… Something. That one color that Dipper has only seen in the Mindscape. The one Bill thinks is ‘pretty’.

This thing is the source of the red light, radiating an eerie hellish aura, as the cracks start to grow and spread.

Judging by the way Other Bill looks at it, eye alight with pure avarice - rubbing his hands together, too -

“Ha! Now there’s what I was looking for!” Other Bill strides forward, grinning wide.

Dipper grimaces.

Well. There’s his freaking ‘wound in the skin of reality’, apparently.

Just great.

“A rift.” Other Bill purrs. He clenches his fist, grinning wide and triumphant. He starts laughing, loud and wild, lifting his arms - “Finally, a good surprise!”

And around him, the earth shifts, and changes.

Several rocks totter away on unsteady, newly-formed legs. A bird darts overhead and sprouts several more wings - and a the head of a deer - before it burst into flames with a squawk.

Dipper feels his blood run cold.

Shit.

The skin of a dimension keeps its internal rules in place. When there’s a break in that, things get shifting, and strange, it isn’t meant to work like this. Just like Bill in the Mindscape - in a place where he isn’t restricted -

When nothing enforces ‘you can’t’ - he has enough power to stand up and ask ‘why not?’

“It’s about time.” Other Bill’s laughter turns into a cackle. He stands in front of that new break in the universe, shoulders squared. “I can’t wait to get started!”

Proud, and full of his own power.

All of it.

“Welp, guess I don’t need you anymore!” Other Bill shrugs, tilting his head with a coy grin. “Credit where it’s due - it wasn’t boring, Pine Tree!” He waves, and winks. “I’ll at least give ya that!”

Dipper watches as he paces forward - then pause. Other Bill lifts a finger in the air.

“But then again…” Other Bill hums for a moment. Dipper feels a tendril of dread seep into him.

Then Other Bill curls his finger towards himself, and Dipper gets dragged over the dirt by an invisible force.

“When it comes to you, eh.” Other Bill waggles a hand, and winks. “Maybe I’ll-”

The world goes ‘zmm’ for a moment with a taste of oranges, and a smell like earwax. The air wibbles like it’s under intense heat, only with a paisley pattern.

Other Bill starts. He turns back towards the rift, somewhat surprised. "What."

And Dipper skids to a stop, bracing himself on the ground. He clutches at the bare dirt like it’s a lifeline, heart pounding in his chest.

He can’t tell what’s going on. He doesn’t know what to do. But whatever’s stopping Other Bill from acting, he could practically kiss it, he’s so grateful.

And a hand bursts out of the rift, cracking it further open.

The motion sends not-real splinters of unreality shattering to the forest floor, bubbling up into nothingness. Dipper stares as it pats around for a moment, until it finds another part of the crack, and pushes.

It’s a weird hand. A strange hand, black and formlessly weird.

Instantly recognizable.

The hat pops out next. Then a top corner emerges, with a single eye shut as he strains.

Other Bill smacks himself over the eye, muttering. “You have got to be kidding me.”

Dipper feels his heart surge, and he starts to smile.

Bill Cipher always comes back.

His Bill is there, Dipper can feel the bond bright inside him, like a light. Showing exactly who it is, and where he is, right down in his soul. Not distant anymore, not gone anywhere, Bill’s right there.

Bill swears, and shoves, and pushes against that interdimensional wound until his bottom angles follow him out, popping fully into reality -

And he instantly flops to the ground. Surface first, with a resonating ‘thud’. There’s some muffled swearing. Bill’s legs flail in the air.

“Blegh.” Bill shakes himself. “Stupid friggin’-” He shoves himself up off the ground, muttering in a distinctly grumpy manner. “Lousy hack built the worst goddamn-”

Other Bill coughs into his fist, turning away and looking distinctly uncomfortable. A bad look for one Bill must bruise both their egos.

“Whoo! Now that was a trip,” Bill says, finally over himself. He starts dusting off his sides. He glances back at the rift, rolling in its socket. “Not as dramatic an entrance as I’d like, but eh,” He shrugs and floats in the air, lower eyelid lifted and arms raised. “Hey, Gravity Falls! Good to be back!”

Doing the impossible is in Bill’s purview, and usually Dipper tries to figure it out. There’s always questions when it comes to his demon. Always the urge to make it seem reasonable.

This time, Dipper has no questions, at all. Bill can do whatever the hell he likes.

“And boy, lemme tell ya,” Bill continues, brushing his hat off. He plops it down to float over his top corner, fists resting on his sides. “You would not believe the day I’ve had.”

Other Bill clears his throat, and steps forward, halfway blocking Dipper’s view. The jerk.

“Huh.” Bill folds his arms over himself, leaning forward, eye narrow. “You.”

“Well, well, well,” Other Bill says. There’s a smile on his face, with no humor behind it. “If it isn’t Bill! Nice to see ya!”

“Bill.” Bill floats closer, looking him over. His fingers drum on his other arm. “Real nice to meet ya.” A clear and blatant lie.

There’s a long, awkward silence.

“So….” Other Bill trails off, clearly searching for a topic. Once he alights on one, he grins. “How was the vacation?” A wink. “ Thought you might need one, considering…” He waves over… everything. “Your place.”

“Oh, ‘vacation’, he says.” Bill makes the finger quotes, flaring bright gold. “Sure, I've had a good look around your digs.” He sets his fists on his sides. “And lemme tell ya, I was not impressed.”

Other Bill snorts - though his back straightens in offense “C’mon, it’s pre-conquered! Free reign over a whole plane!” He spreads his arms wide with a smile. “Compared to this craphole, what’s not to like?”

“Oh, of course! Why didn’t I think of that?” Bill smacks his top corner, low and sarcastic. “Except that taking things over is seventy percent of the fun!” Bill glows brighter, slightly tinged with red. “You plopped your pre-chewed gum of a dimension in my palm outta friggin’ nowhere!”

Other Bill draws himself up self-importantly. “Like what you’ve got is-”

“Ah, cram it. I didn’t come back for this.” Bill shoves him to one side, dismissive, and floats right past him. Other Bill stays upright, but his shoes leave a streak in the dirt. He sputters, indignant. Bill glares, pointing two fingers at him. “I’ll deal with you later.”

As that single, strange eye finally alights on him, Dipper scrambles to get to his feet.

He wants to see Bill again. He wants to grab this stupid triangle and shake him, and yell at him, try and crush those metal angles like a tin can in his arms, even though it’s impossible -

“Hey there, sapling!” Bill spreads his noodly black arms wide, lower eyelid raised, and glowing. “How’re you-”

Only when Dipper moves to prop himself onto his feet, he forgets about his wrist.

It fails within the first push - Dipper swears - and he thumps back down into the dirt.

Across the clearing, Bill’s slit pupil narrows to a thin line. His arms drop.

Great. Instead of leaping up, and being cool and dramatic, Dipper looked dumb.

He lets his head drop onto the ground. Even the rest of his face feels hot now.

Shit, he should -

“Hm.” It’s a low, displeased sound.

Then Dipper hears Other Bill speak up -

“Oh no. No no no no, and no. C’mon, you’re smarter than this.” Other Bill sounds almost… scolding? “Believe it or not, I got an understanding of your particular damage.” His voice holds a sneer. “You gotta know how messed up you are!”

Okay, what?

Dipper rolls onto his side, pushing himself into a sitting position. He has to see this.

His Bill’s gone fully red now. Growing, and - actually, he keeps growing, eye black and full of golden symbols. He cracks nonexistent knuckles. One hand, then the other.

“Oh come on! This is bullshit!” Other Bill looks up at him with disgust, head tilting back as Bill grows. Some confusion flickers over his face. He glances over, waves an arm at Dipper. “He’s just a-”

One enormous hand draws its index finger back, and flicks.

Watching Other Bill sail over - then through - some of the treeline makes Dipper feel the best he has in at least two days.

By the distant, but loud cracking of branches - Dipper winces at a particularly loud one - That Bill… might not be out of commission. But it’ll be a long, long walk to get back to the rift he wanted.

“Welp!” Bill shrinks down again, brushing off his hands. Golden again, and bright. “That’s a problem for later.” He casts a glare at the arc Other Bill made through the branches, and sets his hands on his sides. “Jeez, what a prick.”

Bill floats over, and Dipper glances up at the irritated, eerie shape in front of him “As for you, kid. -”

Bill’s triangular form starts to wobble and shift. Weirdly bright, and oddly silent. Dipper shuts his eyes against the light. When he looks again, it’s at -

A recognizable face. With a bright grin on said face, charming and pleased.

“Bet you’re glad to see a familiar look. Huh?” Bill - in a human shape, the one he’s always in - winks. “Get it?” He waits for a beat - then rolls his eye, and holds out an arm towards Dipper. “Alright, get up already.”

Dipper just… stares at him for a moment.

He did know Bill could shapeshift. Size and color and some varieties of geometry he’s seen, but he wasn’t aware it could be this… thorough. Though he supposes Bill hasn’t really had much reason; he’s not typically out of shape.

Bill’s grin falls by a fraction. “Sure, don’t break out the party crackers and champagne or anything. Totally wasn’t a pain in the angles getting that mess sorted.” He jerks a thumb in the rift’s direction. He waits a bit, then pushes the smile back on his face. “Aw, you’re too stunned to react! C’mere!”

Dipper gets hauled up, Bill holding him under his arms. He shuts his eyes, and clenches his jaw tight. Bill’s grip isn’t hard - if anything it’s less so than usual - but Dipper’s wrist really didn’t like being moved again.

“What, did you think I wouldn’t show up?” Bill’s grin widens. He’d probably be preening if he wasn’t holding Dipper up like he just won a carnival prize - though his gaze keeps darting over Dipper. “Like you’d get rid of me that easy.”

Dipper doesn’t have a response ready. He… should probably think of one.

Nothing comes to mind, though. Mostly there’s headache and faceache and just… ache, with relief and surprise fighting for the steering wheel. Wit’s so far in the backseat it might as well be in the trunk.

Bill’s grin continues falling by degrees; it falters. Glancing over Dipper, up and down, turning him slightly side to side

“C’mon, sapling, speak up.” Dipper gets jostled, just a quick couple bounces. Now Bill’s face is strange, and serious. He even pauses, and Dipper dimly realizes he hasn’t seen this expression before - “I hate it when you won’t talk.”

True enough. His Bill hates not getting a response, the attention hogging, narcissistic -

Dipper breathes in, shakily, and sighs. He looks at his stupid demon, exasperated. “Put me down, Bill.”

The grin blooms again, even brighter this time. “Ha! I don’t think so!” Dipper watches Bill’s posture change as relief rises off him like steam. He pulls Dipper closer, pressing an overly-dramatic smooch on his jaw. “You already had your vacation from me, Pine Tree. I’ll do whatever I want!”

It’s ridiculous, and - and maybe a little sentimental, but Dipper feels heat rise to his face. Like warmth spreads out from where Bill’s touching him.

Dipper blinks rapidly, and clears his throat. “Let me down?” He tugs at Bill's arm, just gently.

“Alright, alright,” Bill, surprisingly, relents without much fight. He sets Dipper on his feet, smile fading somewhat. “Let’s have a look at ya, anyway.”

“I’m fine.” Dipper lets his forehead drop against Bill’s shoulder. It’s solid and warm. Tension is dropping out of his shoulders, which is probably why they’re shaking.

Dipper’s been in worse shape - and in better - but things are a hell of a lot finer than even three minutes ago.

“Right,” Bill says, very dry. Dipper gets pushed slightly away, a knuckle tilts his chin upwards. “‘Cause this just screams fine, like a horrorshow!” Bill’s eye darts over his face - frowning now, lips drawn tight. “Where else did he get ya?”

Weird question. "Nothing serious.” Dipper tries tucking his arm by his side, but that only makes Bill's face turn down more. “It’s cool.”

"It's only 'cool', for a guy who's lost all sense of thermoregulation." Bill tugs Dipper’s arm up by the elbow, glaring at his wrist. Admittedly, it is swelling a little. “You’re real crap at lying.”

Dipper watches as Bill taps a warm finger on the reddening skin, and sucks in a sharp breath. Bill’s lip twitches. He lets the arm down carefully, only to grasp Dipper’s sides.

“Don’t bother covering stuff up, ‘cause for once I’m not messing with you.” Bill says, flat this time. "Own up to the rest, already." And at Dipper’s look of confusion - Bill tugs him closer, strangely serious. ”He wouldn’t have started with the face.”

Dipper swallows, and nods.

Sure, he knows Bill - but Bill definitely knows himself, so that’s. Deeply unnerving, on multiple levels.

But also, thankfully, wrong.

Bill’s running his hands up and down, squeezing like he’s checking for a soft spot on some produce. Not finding much - though there’s a spot on Dipper’s ribs he hadn’t noticed himself. For some reason Bill’s only more insistent after that -

“Hey.” Dipper taps Bill on the cheek. He offers a half-smile, the best he can manage. It startles Bill enough that his inspection slows. “I missed you.”

Maybe Bill has a follow up to that. Maybe he’s going to insult, or - something, but fuck it, Dipper did miss him, and -

He wraps his arms around his husband. One can’t join in properly, but Dipper thumps Bill between the shoulders, and hugs on tight.

Let him try to get away from this.

Possessive arms clamp around him in response. A comforting bear trap that Dipper intentionally set off, even if it isn’t nearly as squishing as usual. Like Bill isn’t certain how much to hold him, even though he’s had plenty of experience.

Dipper relaxes into it anyway.

When Bill shapeshifted, he must have used the body template he’s used to wearing. Even now, Dipper can feel his heart, steady and comforting, beating somewhat faster than the usual second-and-a-half pace.

Then Bill sighs. “Well, whatever. You’re pretty intact! All limbs accounted for and everything!” A firm kiss gets planted on Dipper’s forehead. Then another on his temple, before Bill basically shoves Dipper’s face against his neck. Adding a couple thumps of his own on Dipper’s back. “Not too shabby, all things considered.”

Bill finally squeezes Dipper’s waist with one arm. His other hand cups the back of Dipper's head, fingers carding through Dipper’s hair, once, then twice.

Every time Bill wants to hug Dipper close, he throws in human-abnormal pressure. Not painful, just to one side of uncomfortable; like he’ll never, ever let Dipper escape his grasp.

Dipper matches it as well as he can. He kind of gets it now.

With the sounds of the forest, and Bill here, and holding him, it’s almost like things are normal. Quiet and still, while he feels the warmth of Bill's body his arms, and the bright red glow of the air -

Dipper jerks his head up.

Staring at the still-extant crack in reality.

Thankfully it doesn’t seem to have grown since, but if he looks too close it kinda hurts his eyes. And part of his brain.

“Uh.” Dipper taps Bill a few times on the shoulder. There's a sigh against his scalp, as Bill hums something quietly. Dipper taps a little harder. “Bill?”

“What?” The word is slightly muffled by Dipper’s hair.

Dipper nudges him. “Should I be worried about that?”

“Hm?” It takes Bill a moment - he tilts his head, following Dipper’s gaze - then smirks. He snorts, like Dipper pointed out a big scary bug in the bathroom. “Pfft, oh, that.”

True to form, a ten-foot eggshell crack in the flesh of the universe doesn’t seem like a big deal to him. Dipper leans back and meets his eye skeptically.

“That’s barely a papercut, not a genuine fistula. Nothing important..” Bill waves over the rift, other arm staying tight on Dipper’s waist. “We got bigger fish to fry!”

Dipper hesitates. “Uh.” He darts a look at the rift, then back again. “Really?”

“Oh, definitely! That Bill and I have some unfinished business,” Bill’s eye glows red, and his grin shows an absurd amount of teeth. “We’ve gotta have a little chat.”

#Bill vs Bill #Okay now what to say in the tags #Without spoiling anything in the post hmmmm except okay there's a little violence guys #Okay first of all yes the thing gets further elaborated on in the next part #Second I wonder how many people googled that word and went 'ew'#And third this entire concept was so big brained because #While Bill would look at pretty much any other demon or monster or abomination and go 'eh he can handle it'#If there's one being in the multiverse Bill isn't going to underestimate it's himself #And Bill knows to the Exact Degree how nasty he can get #He had a whole two days to stew in that knowledge #With only the information that Dipper was still alive which is arguably not all that helpful #Dipper's usually got the runaway imagination but Bill's isn't any less powerful in terms of imagery and creativity #I've already started writing the fourth and final part and hopefully that'll go over well #Hopefully this part goes over well and you liked it!#Other/Weirdmaggedon Bill is not very happy about this turn of events as you can imagine #Things aren't just going to get nasty they're gonna get PERSONAL #Our Bill would shell out huge amounts of cash or favors to hear some of those things Dipper said #I hope you enjoy this silly fic and thank you for reading #Just one more part left though it'll be a big one!#I even have a fun epilogue idea that I may never get to but we'll see how things go

196 notes · View notes