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danytar · 3 days

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“Always” [ Prince!Aegon X Wife!Reader ]

Warnings: expletives, cussing, Unfaithful aegon,fondle breasts,vulgarity,sex,(m receiving), dark aegon,hedonistic, sm jealous ").

Summary: Your loving husband returns to your room in the middle of the night after his exciting adventures in the pleasure houses.

It is known that your husband had a bad reputation in the court even your marriage to him did not prevent him from continuing his bad hobbies It wasn't a very terrible marriage but also not that perfect.

You and your husband have learned to understand each other he was so kind and sweet to you and when it comes to sex he's an expert and never leave you unsatisfied.

But there was a problem.. your jealousy and your possession you wanted him all for yourself something he didn't know and you didn't show. At first It was okay and you didn't have a problem with his actions because no matter how many women he sleeps with, he will always come back to you. he loved you but this was not enough to stop him.

Even though he told you hundreds of times that he loves you and all those whores mean nothing to him, you still insist that he does not love you.. that you was not enough for him.

It was almost the midnight and you were in your chambers lying on your bed with a book in your hands reading in peace the air was cold and the room was a bit dark just the light of candles that are about to go out a little things made your day.

Your soft air was interrupted by the sound of the bedroom doorknob being turned. and there he was as usual a drunk and barely able to walk his clothes were dirty his silver locks were disheveled he smell reeked of sweat and cheap wine, not to mention the women ofc..

“you still awake? Were you waiting for me, my sweet love?”. He barely uttered his words he dragged himself towards your bed.

You put your book aside and sighed in frustration you looked at him with a disappointed look and a slight frown on your lips. “The brothel again?”.

He looked sheepish, his cheeks reddening, but he didn't seem all that remorseful. though, he had the sense to look away from you, his silence confirming that it was, indeed once again the brothel.

“Don't you feel ashamed of your actions? ”. You spoke to him in a serious tone this time because you were really fed up with his actions he was standing close to your bed but he looked at you and then said in a drunken tone:

“Why should I be ashamed? I did nothing wrong...” He laughed, but it was a nervous, shaky laugh.You could just hear him sigh through the silence following his reply.“I-” He pauses “It doesn't mean I dont love you-” He coughs, wiping the wine stained lips on his robes sleeve. “I cant help it... I just-”

“You have made us the laughing stock of the court”. you replied with a heavy sigh. He shrugs slightly, he's never had a problem with being laughed at before, he simply drank that feeling away too. “It doesnt matter... People laugh behind our backs anyway”.

He looks at you through heavy-ish eyes. He doesnt look at you like you are a mother scolding him, he looks at you like he is a boy getting rejected for the first time. It's a pathetic look, but he cant hold eye contact long enough for either of you to comment on it.

“Why are you here aegon? ”.

“What do you mean? Im here because I-” He sighs, his hands gripping the sheets as he pushes himself up into a sitting position. “Because I’m your husband!..”

“My husband changes his whores more than his clothes.”

He chuckles at that, finding your bluntness slightly humorous, not to mention it made him feel like he wasn't in such a hard spot. “...Thats not true”. He says, hoping you'll let it go at that.

When he tries to touch you, you move your hands away from him “Don't touch me or something”. you replied In a firm, almost broken voice.

He is visibly hurt by the rejection, but is too exhausted to even show the emotion to its fullest, he only slightly grimaced when you moved your hands away. He tries again, but doesnt say anything, begging you silently to forgive him for once or at least humour a kiss or something.

“You didn't even try to wash yourself off that shit.”

He sighs. “I...” He rubs his eyes, too tired to even say anything. For once in his life, he was at a loss for words. It was like he knew he was too dirty to even deserve a kiss, and yet his desire and desperation to be loved overpowered that.

You quickly grab your book and ignore his presence. Aegon sighs, he didnt want to be ignored, even in the state he was in. “Darling...” He tried to reach for the book, wanting to gain your attention when you didn't answer him, he placed his head on your shoulder and looked at the page you were reading.

He groans slightly, wanting to at least get your attention.“I missed you y/n ” He sighs “Im tired and drunk and-” He pauses as if searching for the right answer, settling on the most honest one. “Lonely”.

“Why didn’t you bring your whores with you? Maybe they would fill your loneliness.” after your comment he feels himself boil, the rage boiling inside him. “Oh come on, its not the same, and you know it! Theyre not you, and they dont fill the void either, you know that...”

“Don't fool me aegon-” You push the sheets off and get out of bed when he saw you doing that he growls “Damn it, you know what Im talking about!”.

He is too tired to properly have this argument and he was trying desperately to get you to understand him. The silence was getting to him and he was starting to get angry and frustrated because he felt himself not being understood. “All I wanted was your company, and the first thing you ask me is about some brothel?!”

“I'm tired of your behavior! you're.... you're...” You paused for a moment to find the right word.

“I’m what?" He snaps, the anger finally boiling out of him. “What am I? Tell me!”

“A WHORE ”.

He scowls, the words stinging him like fire. "Shut your mouth!" He tries to sit up, but the alcohol makes him dizzy as he falls back. "Youre as much of a whore as I am, you know that right?!". He approaches you and grabs your arm tightly Even if he was a drunk, he is still stronger than you.

“You dare talk back to me! maybe I should put you in your place again wife”. He growled into your ear when you try to look at him he slaps you hard. You are surprised by the sudden slap. This is the first time he has raised his hand on you like that.

You do not let the slap go unnoticed, but return it to him harder which causes him to stumble backwards. He growls in pain when you returned his slap with a greater amount of force, his jaw slightly dropping with surprise.

He takes a step backwards, but only because of the sharp pain that shoots across his cheek. He rubs his cheek for a bit, trying to soothe the sting. His eyes turn to you again, and you can still see the anger in his eyes. This was new.

His hand moves from your arm to your face and he grabs your cheek, his thumb feeling over the spot where he had struck you.

He narrows his eyes as he watches you, his thumb rubbing the mark he had left there. He is still filled with the rage of jealousy and bitterness, but he is also filled with sadness. He leans down, bringing his face only an inch from yours.

When you tried to evade his grip, he held you in place and pressed his lips firmly on yours, whether you liked it or not. The suddenness of his action caused you to stiffen, and in the moment of stiffness, you didnt immediately respond to his kiss.

He could feel every tensed muscle in your body and he relished in the feeling. It was as if you had been a puppet for him to control like they way he wanted to. It was a feeling of pure power, and he loved it.

He was still holding your face, keeping you in place when he wrapped his hands around your wrists, he gently guided them to his neck, wanting you to feel the power he had over you. He pressed his mouth on yours again, pushing his body into yours as his grip on you tightened.

He was feeling completely overwhelmed with power as he started to rip into your dresses. It felt good to finally show you who was truly in-charge. It wasnt your body nor your choice. It was his. He owned you. He tore off your dress, before taking you roughly to the bed.

He began to forcefully remove his clothes as he said “I know what my greedy wife wants.. she wants my cock only for herself ”.

“You know what I want, so why do you keep giving my rights to other women?”. He laughed and lay on top of you "I like to make you jealous." He said before he started nibbling and sucking your neck to your thighs.

"They're nothing...nothing like my wife's sweet pussy”. You mumbled and parted your legs he placed wet kisses on your thighs, reaching your sweet spot which he loves the most.Your breath hitched when you felt his tongue on you.

You tangled your fingers in his hair and let him give you his services. Even if he is clumsy and makes you angry, he has his own ways of making you feel good.

After several rounds, you felt a terrible pain between your legs maybe the most Sweetest pain you have ever felt. Your head was on his chest while his arms were gently caressing your ass.

It was a moment of bliss and calm between the two of you.You were listening to his heartbeat and feeling his chest rising and falling slowly. He broke the silence by saying: “I will never see them again.”

“What? ”. You lifted your head from his chest to look at him. He gently stroked your cheek with his other hand and looked at you “The pleasure houses.. I won't go again, I promise.. I realized how foolish I was.. I love you I don't want to lose you for the sake of random whores ”.

you looks at him with all the love you have.. “I love you too aegon”. He lifted his head to place a small kiss on your lips.

“Will you love me always? ”

“Always my love”.

He smilies.. “Can I pass out now?”. you chuckled and nodded he immediately closed his eyes and fell into a deep sleep. You kept your head on his chest, your fingers drawing random circles on it. You stayed like that for a short while until you passed out with him..

♡ – 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 : @darylandbethfanforever9 @hisfavegiri @callsignwidow @xitsemm @saltytidalwavetyphoon @khaleesihel @credulouskhaleesi @lovelykhaleesiii

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communistkenobi · 22 hours

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Hi, genuine good faith question if you'd like! How is TOS racist? It was my understanding that the OG Series was like, huge for equality in media?

I’m speaking primarily about the content of TOS itself, not its historical impact - I understand it had various historic firsts in terms of having characters of colour in respectable roles, which I’m not dismissing. My experience with the discourse on here surrounding the show is that people front-load these character representations as emblematic of the show’s progressive politics. Which, if we want to go that route, TOS was contemporary to the US civil rights movement, which provides us with a handy measuring stick to see how TOS actually grapples with race, not just the presence of characters of colour themselves. I'm going to be kind of defensive in this explanation, not towards you specifically, but because I have had this conversation with people online many, many, many times, and so any defensiveness on my part is in anticipation of arguments I know will come up as a result of making the basic claim that a show made in America in the 1960s is racist. I'm also going to be copy + pasting from an older post I've made on the subject since it's been a while now since I've watched TOS so some of the details are fuzzy.

Like okay, the premise of TOS is that the Enterprise, as an ambassador of Starfleet/the Federation, is seeking out new alien life to study. The Prime Directive prohibits the Enterprise crew from interfering with the development of any alien culture or people while they do this, so the research they collect needs to be done in an unobtrusive way. I think this is the first point at which people balk at the argument that TOS is racist or has a colonial conception of the world - the Enterprise’s mission is premised on non-interference, and I think when people hear ‘colonial’ as a descriptor they (understandably, obviously) assume it is describing active conquest, genocide, and dispossession. Even setting aside all the times where Kirk does directly interfere with the “development” of a people or culture (usually because they’ve “stagnated” culturally, because a culture "without conflict" cannot evolve or “develop” beyond its current presumed capacity - he is pretty explicitly imposing his own values onto another culture in order to force them to change in a particular way), or the times when the Enterprise is actually looking to extract resources from a given planet or people, I’m not exactly making this claim, or rather, that’s not the only thing I’m describing when calling TOS racist/colonial.

The show's presentation of scientific discovery and inquiry is anthropological - the “object” of analysis is alien/foreign culture, meaning that when the Enterprise crew comes into contact with a new being or person, this person is always read first and foremost through the level of (the Enterprise’s understanding of) culture. Their behaviour, beliefs, dress, way of speaking, appearance, and so on are always reflective of their culture as a whole, and more importantly, that their racial or phenotypic characteristics define the boundaries of their culture. Put another way, culture is interpreted, navigated, and bound racially - the show presents aliens as a Species, but these species are racially homogeneous, flattening race to a natural, biological difference that is always physically apparent and presented through the lens of scientific objectivity, as "species" is a unit of biological taxonomy. Basically species is a shorthand for race. This is the standard of most sci-fi/fantasy genre work, so this is not a sin unique to Star Trek.

Because of this however, Kirk and Co are never really interacting with individuals, they are interacting with components of a (foreign, exotic, fundamentally different) culture, the same way we understand that a biologist can generalize about a species using the example of an individual 'specimen'. And when the Enterprise interacts with these cultures, they very frequently measure them using a universalized scale of development - they have a teleological (which is to say, evolutionary) view of culture, ie, that all cultures go from savage to rational, primitive to advanced, economically simple to economically complex (ie, to capitalist modes of production). And the metrics they are judging these cultures by are fundamentally Western ones, always emphasising to the audience that the final destination of all cultures (that are worthy of advancing beyond their current limited/“primitive” stages) is a culture identical to the Federation, a culture that can itself engage in this anthropological mission to catalogue all life as fitting within a universal set of practices and racial similarities they call “culture.”

This is a western, colonial understanding of culture - racially and spatially homogeneous people comprise the organs of a social totality, ie, a society, which can then be analysed as an “object,” as a “phenomenon,” by the scientists in order to extract information from them to produce and advance state (ie Federation) knowledge. The Enterprise crew are allowed to be individuals, are allowed to be subjects with a capacity for reason, contradiction, emotion, compassion, and even moments of savagery or violence, without those things being assigned to their “race” or “culture” as a whole, but the people they interact with are only components of a whole which are “discovered” by the Enterprise as opportunities to expand and refine the Federation’s body of knowledge.

Spock is actually a good example of what I'm talking about, because he is an exception to this rule - unlike the others in the crew, his behaviour is always read as a symptom of his innate Vulcan-ness, where his human and Vulcan halves war for dominance in his mind and character. Bones (the doctor, one of the main cast) constantly comments on Spock's inability to feel things, that he is callous and unsympathetic, ruled by Vulcan logic to such an extreme that his rationality is a form of irrationality, as his Vulcan blood prohibits him from tempering logic with human emotion and intuition. Now you can argue that Bones is a stand-in for the racists of the world, that Spock proves Bones wrong in that he is able to feel but merely keeps it under wraps, that Vulcans are not biologically incapable of emotion but merely live in a socially repressive culture, but this still engages in the racial logic of the show - Vulcans are a racially-bound species with a single monolithic culture, and Spock's ability to express and feel 'human emotions' is the metric by which he is granted human subjectivity and sympathy.

And on the flip side you have the Klingons - a “race” that is uniformly savage, backward, violent, and dangerous. In the episode Day of the Dove, where Klingons board the Enterprise along with an alien cloud that makes everyone suddenly aggressive and racist (this show is insane lol), the Enterprise crew begins acting violent and racist, but the Klingons don’t change. They aren’t more violent than before (because they already were fundamentally violent and racist), and they don’t become less violent when the cloud eventually leaves (because they are never able to emerge from their violence and savagery as a social condition or external imposition - they simply are that way). Klingons are racially, behaviourally, psychologically, and culturally homogeneous, universally violent and immune to reason, and their racial characteristics are both physical manifestations of this universal violence as well as the origin of it. The writers and creators of TOS are explicitly invoking the orientalist idea of the “Mongolian horde,” representing both the American fear of Soviet global takeover as well as blatantly racist fears about “Asiatics” (a word used in the show, particularly in The Omega Glory where a fear of racialised communist takeover is made explicit) dominating the world.

This is colonial thinking! Like, fundamentally, at its core, this is colonial white supremacist thinking. Now this is not because TOS invents these tropes or is the origin of them, it is not individually responsible for these racial and colonial logics - these conceptions are endemic to Western thought, and I am not expecting a television show to navigate its way outside of this current colonial paradigm of scientific knowledge. I’m also not expecting an average person watching this to pick out all the intricacies of this and link it to the colonial history of Europe or the colonial history of western philosophy/thought. But this base premise of Star Trek is why the show is fundamentally colonial - even if it was the case that the crew never intervened in any alien conflict, never extracted any material resources from other people, this would still be colonial logic and colonial thinking. The show has a fundamentally colonial imagination when it comes to exploration, discovery, and culture.

I think a good place to end is the opening sequence. The show's first line is always "Space! The final frontier." I do not think the word frontier is meant metaphorically or poetically - I think the show is being honest about its conception of space as an infinitely vast, infinitely exotic frontier from which a globally Western civilisation (which the Enterprise is an emblem of) can extract resources, be they material or epistemic

#tos.txt #< have more posts in there also

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vivwritesfics · 2 days

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Shine A Light Into The Wreckage

Chapter Four - Not-Bob

Bob Floyd was many things. He was an instructor at Top Gun, a lover of Tolkien books and a huge fan of coffee. But Bob was also clumsy. That was how he bumped into the table, knocking her drink onto her notebook. He felt bad about it. Bad enough to come back time and time again, in the hopes that she would be there. And, every time, she is. Each time looking a little worse for wear. It doesn't take Bob long to realise he has to save her.

Warnings: Abusive relationship! Abusive hair pulling! Abusive choking! Forceful sex! Domestic abuse! Seriously don't read if you're affect by stuff like this! Talks of stalking (but in a non serious manner) (Specifically this chapter has 0 warnings, it's just cute)

Series Masterlist

"You officially dress like a grandpa."

On the two other times they had met, she had been at the café before him, almost like she was waiting for him. This time, though, Bob was there first. He had her hazelnut latte with oat milk and a black coffee in front of him.

When she took off her bag and sat opposite him, Bob pushed the hazelnut latte towards her. "You know," she began as she settled into her seat. "I come here to write. You're making it really hard, Bobby," she said, wearing a smile. "But thank you."

Bob gave it a second. "You owe me a name," he said, one hand around his coffee shop mug.

"You're a terrible stalker." She shook her head, grin widening as she took another sip. It was perfect, her exact order. But then she gave him her name.

Bob repeated it back to her, letting it roll off the tongue. "It's nice," he said. "Nicer than Bob."

"Shut up," she said quickly. But it wasn’t malicious in any way. "If you don't like it, why does everybody call you Bob?"

Bob brought his coffee to his lips. "It's my Callsign," he said as he took in a too big sip, burning his mouth in the process. But Bob ignored the sensation as he looked at her.

She looked up at him, eyebrows raised. "What's a Callsign?"

"It's pretty much a nickname that's used for identification. There's probably loads of Roberts on a carrier at any one time but I'm the only Bob," he said and adjusted his glasses, a nervous habit.

She folded her arms over her chest, holding her elbows as she looked at him. "Well, I like Bob," she said, reaching for her coffee. "It's... nice." She couldn't tell him it was cute, even if that was what she meant.

Bob looked around at the café. On the two previous occasions they had met, she had been alone. Even now she was sitting with Bob. Not friends, not her boyfriend. She was alone, aside from Bob.

"What do you do for fun around here?" Bob asked as he leaned forward.

She let out a laugh, but only a weak one. "What do I do for fun? What do you do for fun, Mr Pilot Guy?"

"I go to The Hard Deck," Bob answered.

He stared at her as he waited for her to answer. But, for the first time since they had met, he had left her without anything to say.

Her eyes met his as she fiddled with her cream, cuffed sleeve of her sweater. "Is it... do you guys really have fun in there?" She asked him.

Bob's brows furrowed behind his glasses. "I thought you said you'd been there."

"I have!" She said quickly. "But, you know, it wasn’t all that fun," the last part she said quietly.

That look crossed her face again, the one she wore when he had asked about the book. As much Bob wanted to reach across and touch her hand, he didn’t. "You could come with us, if you'd like. I'd make sure Hangman behaves."

"Yeah," she responded quietly. "I might take you up on that."

She quickly changed the subject, making things light and fun once again. She asked him about Montana, she had so many questions about Montana. Bob answered all of them. He told her about his grandparents farm, about the little house at the bottom of the property. When he was eighteen he had promised his Grandma that he would fix it up, but he hadn't gotten around to it yet. But he had certainly meant to.

She checked the time on her phone periodically, comparing it to the sky. Watching for when it got dark, Bob figured. He had hoped that, once again, he'd get to walk her home.

But, when the sky turned orange, she stood and slung her bag over her shoulder. "I've got to go," she said with a smile. "Thanks for the coffee, Bob."

He stood up with her, bumping the table as he did so. "Do you want me to walk you home? I'm more than happy to," he said, but she shook her head.

"It's okay," she replied and looked at the sky as it turned orange. "It's not dark yet."

But, still, Bob wasn't quite ready to say goodbye. "It's on my way home. It really wouldn't be a-"

"I said no, Bob," she said suddenly, firmly. "Drop it."

Bob just watched her as she walked out of the cafe, shoving her hands into her pockets as she walked down the street. As soon as he couldn't see her, he walked out of the cafe and climbed into his truck. He watched her in his rearview mirror, at least until she turned the corner.

Bob couldn’t help but sigh as he drove off, heading in the other direction to his apartment. He hadn't meant to lie about where he lived and, while it felt harmless at the time, Bob regretted it.

When she disappeared, he let out a sigh and began driving back to his house, back to Frodo. Did she like cats, he found himself wondering. Would she like Frodo if she met him? Frodo would like her. He'd attached himself to the few women that had come into his little house.

***

On the Monday, Bob volunteered for the coffee run yet again. He was already patting his wallet as he began walking out to his truck.

But a hand on his shoulder stopped him. "I'll get it, Baby Bob," said Jake. He gave Bob no time to respond as he climbed into his own car.

"Wait!" Bob called as he watched the car disappear. "Hangman!"

Jake wasn't getting the coffee out of the goodness of his heart. He wasn't doing it to pay Bob back for all of the times he had paid for coffee. He wasn't doing it to give Bob time to prepare for his next lesson at Top Gun.

When Bob was gone for all of those hours on Saturday, he and Natasha had been discussing all sorts of theories. After going in circles, they narrowed in on the cute barista with the pink hair.

Jake parked up outside of the cafe. He climbed out of the car and strode in with the confidence of a saltwater crocodile (a notoriously confident animal).

He didn't spot the cute barista with the pink hair right away. His eyes scanned behind the counter as he stepped up to it. He rang the bell, waiting for someone to serve him.

The cute barista with the pink hair came around the corner. "Hey there," she said with a charming smile.

Jake didn't know what Bob's type was, didn't know that his type was sitting on one of the tables behind him, writing in her newly acquired notebook.

Jake wore his award winning, charming smile as he looked at her name tag. "Hello," he squinted at her name tag, "Mariana," he said, drumming his fingers against the counter top. "Can I get three black coffees?"

Immediately she turned to make coffee. "Do you like a man in uniform, Mariana?" He asked.

"Sure, hun," she said and placed the first coffee in a cup holder on the counter in front of him.

"Yeah," Jake muttered as he rocked on the balls of his feet. "Yeah, one of my fellow aviators has been coming in here a lot," he said. "You haven't seen him, have you? These geeky glasses, Callsign Bob?"

Mariana wore a contemplative expression as she placed the other two coffees in the cup holder.

"Yeah," she finally said, nodding. "Yeah. A hazelnut oat latte and either a black coffee or a tea," she said, looking past Jake. But her eyes quickly went back to him as she rang him up.

He pulled the money from his wallet. "So, Bob hasn't been flirting with you?" He asked with his brows furrowed.

Mariana couldn't stop the laugh from leaving her lips. "I wish," she said to him. "Hasn't he gotten a girlfriend? He always gets his drinks and then sits on one of the back tables with a girl in a knit sweater."

Jake picked up his coffees, thanked her and walked out of the cafe. He climbed into his car and looked back towards the café. Girl in a sweater. He was looking for a girl in a knit sweater.

Of the three people sitting in the café, none of them were wearing a knit sweater.

Jake let out a sigh as he drove away.

She had noticed him the moment he had walked into the cafe. His khaki uniform was the same as what Bob was wearing when they first met, when he threw the coffee over her. She couldn't help but hope it was him, until she looked at his face.

She was crushed with disappointment.

When Not-Bob started talking to the barista, she tried not to listen in. It wasn't her business what this navy man was talking about. He wasn't Bob, so why should she care? Even if it was Bob, she shouldn't be caring if he was flirting with Mariana.

But then Not-Bob mentioned Bob's name, and she couldn't stop herself from listening in. The questions that Not-Bob directed at Mariana, she couldn't help but think that they should have been directed at her.

She sipped her hazelnut oat latte, pen still against the paper as she listened. When Mariana told Not-Bob about her sweater, she grinned, holding back a laugh. Oh yeah, they were definitely talking about her.

Not-Bob thanked Mariana and walked out of the café. She watched him sit in his car for a moment before he drove away.

When he was gone, she closed her notebook and tucked her pen into the binder rings. Slipping her notebook back into her bag she stood up and left the cafe, making her way back to her office.

As she sat at her desk, she stared at the phone. All she wanted was for it to ring, just for something to do. Her notebook, the one that Bob had bought for her, was in front of her, open once again, but she didn't write in it, not with how her boss was staring at her from the office.

The phone finally rang and she directed the call to the salesman. At the sight of her finally doing her job, her boss looked away and she began writing in the notebook.

If she had been clever, she would have gotten Bob to give her his number. God knows she would have spent all day texting him if she had his number.

But then, if she did have his number, how long until Ken found out? How long until Ken broke this phone, just like the last phone she had?

She knew she had to get Bob's phone number, but she wanted to put it off. When Ken found out about Bob, there was no telling what he would do. There was no way she would ever see Bob after, and she enjoyed his company far too much for that.

She would go to The Hard Deck. Ken be damned, she'd go. It was all planned out in her head, what she would do and how she would do it.

All through the work day she imagined how that night would go. Drinking with him, meeting his friends. It sounded like a perfect night, better than any night she had spent with Ken in a long time.

But the more she thought about it, the more anxiety settled in her stomach.

Her boss cleared her throat and she picked up the phone, one she hadn't noticed was ringing.

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jalwyn21 · 2 days

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I have to ask genuinely...what tf is wrong with Taylor Swift? I'm not talking about some armchair diagnosis but rather just genuinely how does someone like that even exist? This level of maliciousness towards anyone who's ever looked at her wrong and just holding on to grudges from a decade ago. Even if someone else is still mentioning her, if she truly is all about karmic justice, then why keep bringing it up? If karma is indeed the guy on the Chiefs and a relaxing thought, then why is she still so bitter? And how could anyone make an entire album aesthetic based off of mental illness? Her using Joe's mental health against him aside, how could anyone actually think that this is a good idea? I can't even bring myself to watch any videos or listen to the full album because the idea of her using mental illness like this and using historical figures like Sylvia Plath, Emily Dickinson and Virginia Woolf who actually dealt with serious mental health issues (that too at a time where people with mental illnesses were literally tortured) and likening herself to them. I'll bet you anything that the majority of Swifties creaming themselves over how alike Clara Bow and TS supposedly look had never even heard of Clara Bow before and still don't know anything about her beyond what they think are similarities between her and TS. How idiotic yet hateful can one person be? And how can so many people not only adore her so senselessly but follow her example and defend every single thing she does?

She gets away with so much just cause she is a woman. If a man would do half the things she does, he'd be labelled toxic and abusive and controlling and be canceled immediately.

#free joe alwyn #jalwyn #q&a #nonnie #joe alwyn #anti taylor swift #joealwyn #toxic swifties #shit swifties say #toxic taylor swift #free joe alwyn from psycho swifties

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deeply-unserious-fellow · 13 hours

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I've made. S o m a n y. Attempts at analyzing Vox's relationship with the fuckin Angel & Val bullshit. So many. But they always come out sounding like fucking word salad. So instead, I'm going to try making a bulleted list of all the different pieces of evidence I've gathered, and then simply not draw a conclusion because I don't fUCKING KNOW-

Vox does not like Angel

Vox seemed excited at the prospect of Angel quitting(despite knowing he physically can't?)

Like his eyes *literally* lit up he was so excited(the same way Velvette's did when she was yelling about wrist ruffles & Carmilla's did during Whatever It Takes)

Saying "Angel quit?" could've been him joking, but between his expression, tone of voice, and the context surrounding the line, I don't think that's the case?

That line is weird as fuck man...

There are two reasons Vox doesn't like Angel: Val constantly freaking the fuck out over minor Angel-related things & he's probably jelous of how much space Angel takes up in Val's brain

Vox does not seem to care for Angel's well being, probably viewing him as nothing more then a cash cow

I say "seem" and "probably" because it IS significantly more likely that Vox doesn't give a shit, but we haven't seen Angel & Vox interacting one on one yet, so there's still a chance I could be wrong and Vox does care in some capacity? Again significantly more likely he doesn't I'm just trying to cover all my bases here

Which speaking of- we don't know how Angel feels about Vox at all? Like aside from Vox's cameo in Poison(Angel's pseudo-dream sequence), we don't actually get Angel's perspective on Vox. Ever.

Like I'd assume Angel doesn't LIKE him just by virtue of his relationship with Val but there's no real way to tell?

Vox(seemingly) hasn't done anything to deal with Val's weird issues with Angel

He probably can't get rid of Angel entirely because of the loss in profits

But he also hasn't attempted to limit Angel's ability to leave the studio or anything, and he hasn't done anything to Val that might discourage his irrational behavior

He's actually pretty hands off when it comes to all of the other Vees' shit just like. In general. The only time we see him interfering is when Val is destroying Velvette's stuff

Vox doesn't seem to give a shit that Angel moved out of the studio

Like he isn't even happy about it just true neutrality-

He only STARTS caring when Val starts threatening to shoot up a building about it(read: when his image is now on the line)

The look Vox gives Angel in Poison just kind of proves he. Doesn't like Angel. And is kissing(but appearently not dating???) Valentino.

The fact that the blood drips, which are usually on the left side of his mouth, are coming off of the right instead during this scene FEELS important but that's another topic entirely so I won't go into it here

Also, as stated before, Poison is a pseudo-dream sequence, so this scene might be less about how Vox views Angel and more about how Angel views Vox

But if that's the case, I cannot for the life of me decipher what the fuck Angel feels about Vox from this one shot so it's pretty much useless for now 💀💀💀

Alright that's it. I tried my best to be impartial and just write down what we know about the characters while also pointing out any gaps in information we might have, but if you think I'm being too generous or too harsh with any of these bullets and feel the need to tell me, PLEASE be nice about it and also use tone indicators. I don't wanna sound like a whiney baby or whatever the fuck but I genuinely cannot handle feeling like a stranger is yelling at me rn and tone indicators help me a LOT in that department.

#this is still fucking nonsense but this topic appearently destroys my brain cells so like #this is probably the closest I'll be able to get to successfully putting my thoughts on the subject down #I hate it here I hATE IT HERE #hazbin hotel #hazbin vox #hazbin hotel vox #vox hazbin hotel #angel dust #hazbin angel dust #hazbin valentino #hazbin hotel valentino #valentino hazbin hotel #gal overanalyzes random shit

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shunnedmorlock · 3 days

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Hi! What are your opinions on each of the greens ?

Have a good day/night!

Otto: I think he gets a bad rap, not in absolute terms but relatively to the people like Viserys and Daemon. If you hate Otto for pushing Alicent to marry Viserys, you should hate Viserys much, much more. Otto is "merely" complicit in what happened. There was no one Vissy could've said no to more effectively than Otto. It just goes to a double standard you see a lot with these farcical black-green debates where people change their opinions on whether it's ok to judge people by in-universe standards depending on what "team" they're a part of. He has a habit of telling unfortunate truths that get him in trouble, but most of the things he says are just, like, objectively true, but people don't want to hear it. Daemon is actually a danger to the realm and his brother, Rhaenyra does actually have to give the scions of great houses a hearing, Daemon did actually groom Rhaenyra to claim the throne, Alicent's children do pose an inherent threat to Rhaenyra by their mere existence.

From a Doylist perspective, like many other things, I think episode 9 really butchered Otto's character. All of a sudden the guy who has been working hand in hand with his daughter for the past few episodes didn't tell her about the plot to seat her son on the throne??? And now the guy who got fired by Aegon for being too slow and measured in his war planning is pushing to kill Rhaenyra immediately? And he wants to send the Kingsguard to do clandestine assassin work? And he's reluctant to ban child fighting pits for like no reason? I'm sorry, you don't have to be a feminist to not like that!

Alicent: I have talked about her at length. Nixonian Queen. I kneel. The war will make her worse, and I enjoy it. One of the characters I think on-balance the show improved.

Criston: Not a good guy by any means, but dismissing him as just a resentful incel is just boring. It's very clear he was, at best, conflicted about his tryst with Rhaenyra to begin with - he liked her, they had a lot of chemistry, but he does genuinely believe in his vows. The marriage thing is obviously silly and naive, but from his perspective it's him trying to do right by her (and also preserve himself and his soul), which puts him a step above many other Westerosi men who canonically often feel no obligations to the women they sleep with outside of marriage or the children created. There is a real difference in values between him and Rhaenyra that goes beyond him hating women, even if his values aren't strictly speaking good. I'm sorry, but the fact that a Westerosi man is as sexually repressed as an average Westerosi woman is genuinely a point in his favor! I sincerely hope he and Alicent make each other worse. Substantially improved by the show.

Aegon: This is going to be controversial, but baffling/over-the-top/ill-thought-out decisions like Dyana and the child fighting pits aside, I much prefer this version of Aegon to F&B. I don't care that he's kind of pathetic, that's fun, that's drama, that gives room for character development and growth into the king he ends up becoming. It's clear the writers do want Aegon to be kind of sympathetic, but it seems they didn't consider what stuff like Dyana would do to that, which to me indicates they meant the focus of that scene to be Alicent and her behavior, not Aegon. Which is stupid. One of the worse victims of inconsistent characterization, switching between vaguely sympathetic drunken frat bro to outright sex criminal every episode, or even in the same episode.

Helaena: I like what they've done with her. It's more interesting for her to be a doomed neurodivergent prophetess than just a little dumb, even though she hasn't done a ton so far. Similarly, in an RP I was a part of, Jaehaera was depicted as not simple, just autistic and it was much more interesting.

Aemond: BORING! Don't care about this guy, sorry. Maybe I'll like him more when he is pathetically down-bad for Alys Rivers, but right now he's just like budget Daemon to me, who I also find boring. He was more interesting as a bullied teen.

Larys: He's a tough guy to adapt because his motivations are kind of nonsensical behind a vague idea of getting back at Rhaenyra (?) for dishonoring his brother (??) by putting his children in line for the throne (???). The foot thing is kind of gross and I do wish they'd have given him an actual motivation but whatever. The actor's good and I do like him and Alicent on balance. Improved by the adaptation.

Tyland: We love our little bureaucrat don't we folks? Hope he gets more screen time later on.

Jasper Wylde: FUCK YOU SHOWRUNNERS WHY IS THE GUY WHO HAS HAD ONE LINE THIS ENTIRE SEASON PART OF THE COUP BUT NOT ALICENT FUCKING HIGHTOWER??????

#hotd #asoiaf #alicent hightower #otto hightower #aegon ii targaryen

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crossdressingdeath · 1 year

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I really hope that TSatS features Nico and Will having so many issues around being complicit in Octavian's death, and Nico in addition having so many issues around killing Bryce. On Octavian's end these are children complicit in a gruesome death; necessary or no, that sort of thing's going to stick with them! Especially since as far as we see they never tell anyone about it (Nico might have told Dionysus during their therapy sessions, but as far as I can remember that's not confirmed), which means the only people they can discuss the whole thing with is each other. ...Or I guess Michael Kahale—assuming he's still alive post-ToA, since that's not actually confirmed—but I feel like the understanding between him and them is probably that they Do Not Acknowledge It, assuming they ever see each other at all. Anyway. I'm sure being able to share the weight of what they were part of between the two of them would help, but... well, sharing the burden of being a teenager traumatized by your part in a brutal death with another teenager traumatized by their part in said brutal death is only going to do so much. And I feel like more specifically the fact that Will is a healer would make the whole situation so much worse for him; knowingly standing by and letting someone die knowing he could easily save them would be hard for any hero, but for someone who's dedicated to healing people? Yeesh.

And of course on top of that... Bryce's death is a really cool and dramatic scene that goes way harder than I'd expect a children's book to go, but it's also absolutely horrific. Partially because Nico turns him into a ghost with zero sign of hesitation and that is so much, but I feel like for Nico partially because he doesn't remember it. Like, the fact that he has no memory of killing Bryce gets glossed over in BoO, but he turned a guy into a ghost with no hesitation or mercy and he doesn't remember. He was really angry at Bryce for threatening Reyna, and the next thing he knew the guy was dead (and he'd been knocked out for three days). He has no idea how he did it or even what he was thinking at the time! He was either out of control of his own actions or he wanted to kill Bryce, and he has no way of finding out which. That would be a terrifying thought: either he's a willing murderer (while him killing Bryce was to save Reyna and Hedge and I fully agree with it, it was absolutely murder in a way Octavian's death isn't, Bryce was completely powerless and begging for mercy by the end there) or his powers can hijack his body and push him into doing things that he would never do of his own free will, and he'll probably never know which. Which does beg the question of if anything could set him off like that again, which I feel like is something that would weigh on Nico. I'd love to see him admit that he's actually really scared that something will push him over the edge again and either he'll lose control of his powers and kill someone else or (possibly worse) discover that he was in control when he killed Bryce and did it because he wanted to. Now, I don't think Nico could turn someone into a ghost just like that, my theory is that it was only possible in Bryce's case because Bryce was threatening someone he loved using a closely held secret (which Nico understandably took rather personally) and, more importantly, he was halfway faded out of the living world already; I doubt he could've done it if he hadn't been mostly full of darkness already or if he hadn't been overwhelmed with protective fury at the threat to his dear friend. But whether or not Nico knows that is unclear; I can see him being terrified at the very thought that it's possible that he could snap and kill someone again.

Basically given how TSatS seems like it's going to be largely about All The Trauma, it would feel like a huge failure on Rick's part to not go into how being responsible for Octavian's death absolutely would've fucked Will and Nico up, and also how directly killing Bryce absolutely would've fucked Nico up. If I'm remembering right, setting aside Luke's death—Percy and Annabeth supplied the weapon he stabbed himself with, but I wouldn't call them complicit in it the way Will, Nico and Michael are complicit in Octavian's death since it was entirely Luke's decision in the end—Will and Nico (and Michael Kahale but he's not important currently assuming he's even still alive) are the only protagonists knowingly and willingly complicit in another demigod's death, and Nico is the only protagonist to actively kill another demigod! I can accept them not talking about it in ToA, since "Hey, we're super fucked up from the deaths we caused/played a part in and we don't know what to do about that because we're kind of sort of murderers before the age of eighteen and that's really not the sort of thing you just tell people" isn't something to drop on Will's suddenly-sixteen-and-mortal godly father without warning during a serious crisis situation and I can't see anyone they might have told about it off-page spilling the beans without permission either and when it happened Apollo was already in deep shit and so probably not paying a lot of attention to what his kid was doing, so our POV character wouldn't know about it and wouldn't find out (I know he's aware that Octavian's dead, but unless I'm forgetting something—which is. entirely possible, I should reread ToA—he doesn't know the part Will and Nico played in it). But if it doesn't come up at all in the book told entirely from their perspectives, I'm... honestly gonna be pretty pissed!

#tsats #heroes of olympus #nico di angelo #will solace #if there isn't a moment in tsats where one of them snaps and just goes 'we are MURDERERS!'#(preferably in response to the other or both of them having moral qualms about something)#and they're both suddenly forced to contend with this thing that they've been trying SO hard to bury #then what is even the POINT #...actually if it doesn't happen i might have to write it because my GOD the angst potential #like you KNOW that even aside from bryce they both consider their part in octavian's death murder #(i don't know if it would count legally but they definitely THINK of it as murder. nico explicitly refers to it as such in boo)#(i guess it's possible will doesn't but i'm pretty certain he does even if he does seem to understand why they had to do it)#and who can they tell about that? how do they even BEGIN to raise that topic?#how do you tell your friends that you knowingly and willingly killed someone even indirectly?#ESPECIALLY given the greek demigods generally seem to frown on killing even enemy demigods #or at least it's not the Generally Done Thing #oh god i'm having so many emotions about the boys thinking they're murderers for their part in octavian's death #send help

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jinstronaut · 23 days

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this is also why i stopped using my tracked tag for a while tbh

#and i might do it again bc its just #a reminder that no one rly cares abt what i do / who i am etc #which might sound over dramatic idk how else to describe it tho its just hollow #it feels very much like a Chore and a Task and if i dont reblog things fast enough from my tag #people get very angry and/or upset with me even tho theres just #so much content and i have 0 time so everything gets queued no matter what #like this whole experience feels like a chore lmao #and it never ever used to #but now theres so much animosity if i dont behave / interact with things Properly #or whatever the make believe rules are idk #this dash can just be so negative like have we all truly descended into madness during this hiatus #bc like i get it ive been up and down and all around too but ive never been straight up MEAN to anyone in this community #and i never want to either so this entire situation thats been bubbling for months just feels like shit #bc what the fuck changed and how do we get back to where we were #i never ever ever ever felt this way before like idk the middle of last year #but ever since like last fall its just been idk. Bad #once again im sorry if ive ever done anything to upset anyone but my silence / absence doesnt mean i dont care #ive just been Incredibly busy due to some real life changes that are out of my control #i might not have energy to answer everything but i do Read everything and it does make me smile #and i save messages that are kind in my heart so i can be reminded of the root of what this blog is supposed to be #a space for something im very passionate about and previously had nowhere else to express said passion #so like idk if we all like the same things why does this weird feeling of competition linger over us lmao #why do all ccs have to fight???? each other???? when we all love and do the same things????#i have nothing against anyone personally but what i Do take issue with is the way that ive been doing this since 2021 and im fully just #ignored and shoved aside by so many people for reasons i fully dont know or understand #so yeah idk this is a novel i just woke up from a spontaneous nap bc im so exhausted i can only stay awake for 3 hours at a time #but yeah anyways idk !#be nice its so easy !#tbd

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hetagrammy · 11 months

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My trip to Ireland got me thinking more about the relationship between Seán and Molly, or at least the differences between them as characters. Like I think they love each other deeply, they've been together since birth. The problem is that for as alike as they can look and act on the surface, twins are still going to have separate personalities. They're both survivors, but they have very different approaches to that survival.

Seán is the negotiator. He's able to talk without giving too much of himself away, the funny friend who you suddenly realize you know nothing about. He's willing to acquiesce to certain ceremonies in order to maintain some semblance of self-governance. He believes he is able to protect core aspects of his identity by playing along, and at the end of the day that's what's important.

Meanwhile, Molly is the defiant one. In comparison to Seán, she wears her heart on her sleeve. She is incapable of bluffing. She lacks the subtlety Seán has. She refuses to give anything up because she already views it as an erosion of her identity. It is all or it is nothing. She won't convert, she refuses to acquiesce, she won't stop rebelling. What's important is that she stays whole.

They're both driven, but their methods of pursuing that drive inherently harms the other. Molly rebels and the warfare ravages Seán. Seán allies with the Ascendancy and Molly is punished for refusing to get with the program. They love and want what is best for the other, and neither of them particularly enjoyed being part of the empire. They both love to drink and dance and be merry. However, for most of their history, they just haven't been able to figure out how to survive together. And that's where the breach between them lies.

#hetalia #my thoughts #hws northern ireland #hws ireland #nyo!ireland #british isles siblings #ireland twins #i just have so many feelings about them #the uk fam as a whole interests me so much (aside from me liking the history)#because they all have these kinds of hang ups #alwyn loves arthur and abides by a lot but does have his resentments #molly adores alasdair as her elder brother but there were times where he failed to protect her like he should have #arthur relies on sean and builds him up but much of that comes at sean having to give up things or at molly's expense #arthur feels he's doing molly a favor even as he's looking after his own interests while she (rightfully) chafes at the control #they are a family unit that is focused on preservation and the power of the unit #but at the same time frequently placed in situations (by each other or their governments) where they have to step on each other to do this

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nostalgia-tblr · 7 months

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#the sylki-versus-the-grandmaster fic that i started in february has just passed 5000 words HOW THE FUCK????#this is the 'oh it's too fucked up to actually finish' thing that i add a bit to whenever things are getting too wholesome elsewhere #and it's not even THAT fucked up aside from the erm constant threat of death and the very-very-dubcon stuff #i started out with the thought 'actually i don't think sylvie would do at all well on sakaar she's too blunt and no good at flattery'#don't ask me how this logically leads to increasingly disturbing frostmaster dubcon it just does okay #but it seems like this might be something i could actually finish now which is maybe good as it's had a title for several months already #(“Love Is A Danger Of A Different Kind” if you were wondering which you probably weren't especially)#it's not effed-up enough to be posted Anon but it might be effed-up enough that nobody's going to want to click on it if posted #or maybe i should just tell myself that last part in case it's actually terrible and i just haven't realised that yet #but that cannot be as the first line is “So why haven’t you two fucked yet?” which is definitely a 100% solid classic opener right there!!!#i think the grandmaster might be the actual worst person from the thor movies he has no sympathetic story he's just a massive bastard #that's why i keep putting him in things. last year's sylki dubcon fic would have floundered without him!#i wouldn't say grandmaster/loki is something i 'ship' as such - it's more something i stare at in horrified fascination #so anywho i just wanted to share my shock that it's somehow got to that many words #i have no idea how long the finished fic would/will be other than 'longer than it perhaps should be'

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wickedghxst · 9 months

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okay i Have to have some sort of out of wack hormones or something.

#was reading up on hrt changes and like. um. aside from the obvious breast growth my fat already goes to where it “redistributes’’ to.#like my overall body shape is already pretty feminine. especially my face. wtf does “cheek tissue gets thicker’’ even mean.#i am honest to god starting to wonder if implants would be my best option. no risk of massive weight gain. body stays relatively the same.#i am wondering if the effects on my like. brain chemistry or whatever are worth any possible physical changes i don’t like though.#i always hear so many stories how it’s been like an overall positive mood lifter for girls. & i Can Not keep being such a cunt.#although i kinda doubt hrt is the answer for that. pretty sure i need entirely different meds to fix Those issues 🥴#idk man. overall i’m just kinda worried it’ll make changes i Won’t like. i’m pretty happy with how i look.#it’s only really two things that cause me discomfort. & i know how i am so if there’s any drastic physical changes i know there’d be issues.

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chantlight · 1 year

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I keep saying I'm gonna polish up thoughts about this specific group in the Silent Plains, and I haven't. So I'm gonna post preliminary rambling instead. All of this is subject to finessing in the future.

So vague thoughts I've had for a long time but never refined are that there is a group of non-Dalish elves — never went to the Dales, are not part of that diaspora — who have been living in the Silent Plains for nigh on a thousand years now. Y'know sometime around Andraste's campaigns or a bit after her death. The Plains are not the most hospitable place, having been permanently tainted by the Battle of the Silent Plains, but they use that to their advantage. No one knows the Silent Plains like they do. Few are willing to brave the desert and fewer still survive. Thus they have kept their freedom, as well as guarded many places that would have been lost to time otherwise.

They have, at times, allied with the Grey Wardens and thus fought alongside their neighbors, but they do not appear in any of the Warden treaties and are frequently lumped in with the Dalish. In fact, very little is known about them, with some claiming they're bands of escaped slaves from the Imperium. Others think they're actually spirits or that they don't exist at all. The few who live on the edges of the Plains and know a thing or two might say they are Dalish but not from the Dales — from the Green Dales between the Free Marches and Antiva. Now they do have a close relationship with Dalish clans in Nevarra + the Free Marches who come near them, and of course they are always a friend to slaves escaping the Imperium, but as you might guess by some taking them for mere folk tales, their isolation has made them mysterious figures. They and perhaps the Dalish clans they have befriended are the only ones who know their history. They are proud and will correct those who mistake them for what they are not, but they've little interest in treating with the Imperium or Nevarra or Hasmal or anyone else for that matter.

They have a rather sizable mage population with even those who aren't mages still exhibiting incredible sensitivity to the Beyond. The Veil is thin in the Silent Plains. To thin they say you can breathe through it. They've a knowledge of the Beyond and its inhabitants few others can fathom. A closeness, too. The ability to draw from its well and the guidance of its people has often helped them find the resources to survive. They don't ascribe to Circle methods of classifying magic, but a Circle mage might marvel at their affinity for the spirit, creation, and arcane trees.

More flashy, though, is their affinity for sand and illusions. The best can conjure mirages so real you'd swear the rest of your life you tasted those dates — provided you survived the dry sand you were actually shoveling down your gullet. Or they can summon a sandstorm so fierce it blots out the sun for a week. There is one cliff where the sand flows backward, up the precipice, and another place where a wall of solid glass stands almost forty feet high with darkspawn weapons lodged inside. Both are feats of magic woven by heroes of their past. Magical glassworks are a specialty of theirs, in fact, just on a smaller scale.

#META / HC: WORLD.#RE: NEVARRA.#I guess this goes in the Nevarra tag #it doesn't go in the others #they don't use aravels or keep halla either #doubtful halla would even survive there #it's tricky because it isn't a normal desert #it was permanently tainted by the First Blight so shit Does Not Grow There aside from the silent plains rose aka felicidus aria #which is where the magic comes in to make the conditions livable #honestly they're probably blight resistant af too. as close to immune as someone can get #but yes we're looking more at animal hide tents and then like . . .#I'm trynna think what animals you could get to survive in a place that's straight up fucking cursed #goats; sheep; camels; cows; horses such as that would be options for a normal desert #we're probably looking at very particular strains of goats and sheep that are uniquely adapted #and fuck it they can have fantasy camels. if halla are fantasy deer they can have fantasy camels #these animals would be their primary source of food and drink tbh #using magic to make things grow will only get them so far so they're probably just managing enough to feed their livestock #but I will say that felicidus aria is edible because I can and also that we have a type of thyme and a type of date #maybe a type of like ephedra alata y'know stuff like that #deserts are not the barren wastelands so many think!! they are teeming with plants and animals!!#just not the Silent Plains because again [gestures] tainted and cursed

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scuopsie · 2 years

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Does anyone else feel… bored? Not even necessary on tumblr. But in mbb verse or kpop in general.

Like… monsta x are on tour and i feel like we have so little content (especially here on tumblr)? Which doesn’t make sense.

#this is more of a rant than a complaint #and definitely not a complaint at update accounts. thats not what this is about #like sure we’re getting fancams every stop but thats not all concerts were about #i mean… I remember from my previous experiences when my ults would tour aside from getting the usual fancams #we’d be getting so many interaction vids going viral #and ments #ments were so huge…. they were usually different at every concert and after every shown we had to wait for them to get translated #(ofc this isnt the case here bc mx are touring the us and they either speak eng or they have a live translator)#but i feel like im barely seeing anything new every stop #idk if they’re not happening or they are but just not going viral #like… sure there are a lot of clips on twt but i fucking hate consuming shit there #and no one reposts stuff on tumblr anymore #Ame is inactive and im clearly not doing it #and i know these clips arent something update accs usually repost #like does anyone else remember having 3-4 different angles of an interaction or an incident that everyone would talk abt for days?#like i cant tell if im growing out of mx/kpop or is it just genuinely not as fun as it used to be #i dont even make sense to me so if anyone else feels remotely the same please come forward im going insane ldfkkdkd #niki screaming into the void #another thing #weren’t a lot of these old hilarious vlives that we talk abt to this day from tour eras?#like them just doing group vlives in their hotel rooms and doing/saying dumb shit?#what a situation bro? prank call? minhyuk and jooheon’s secret bonding experience?#im pretty sure all of this happened in hotel rooms #AND SO MANY MORE

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lightningfilledsaber · 2 years

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bro I fucking hate my gut reaction to be sad and miss the people who hurt me. like, yeah, they were my best friend for years, but not only did they do the exact thing my previous best friend did to me knowing how much that hurt me and fucked me up, but very little of it was actually healthy or even like. nice. it sucked. the last entire fucking year of our “friendship” I was literally in a constant state of anxiety and panic because of their shitty behavior and their girlfriend’s shitty behavior that they fucking enabled. I don’t miss them!!!!! I literally don’t!!! the week after I cut them off I FINALLY relaxed!!!! it was like my entire body had finally uncurled from a fist!!!!! I was no longer suicidal, I was no longer crying every other day, and I finally felt SAFE and secure IN MY OWN APARTMENT. before, I was constantly on edge, paranoid, and ACTIVELY suicidal. I was in a constant state of freeze and fawn as a fear response. I’m not FIXED, by any means, I’m still struggling with shit, but it’s been literal YEARS since I’ve been this peaceful. holy fuck.

#i can recognize that my bpd was making my situation much worse but i was CONSTANTLY being open and communicating to them #and never fucking once did i get that same respect in return #i was treated like a literal fucking chauffer and the only time they fucking spoke to me was to either gush about their gf #who was actively being a huge fucking asshole to me #or bitch about their mommy and daddy and oh how hard it is to have health issues they were actively ignoring #when. lol. at the time they were covered medically by both parents and i had not had health insurance in like? two ish years? lol.#there were so many other fucking things but like that was the biggest thing that stuck with me aside from the emotional manipulation L M A O #and their fucking gf CONSTANTLY comparing me to her abusive father???? out of nowhere???? would just randomly fucking #literally compare me to him when i would say i liked a thing or even if she just observekd something about me like what the actual fuck???#literally on 5 seperate occasions she did this #girl you would throw a fucking fit if i had done anything even vaguely resembling that to you why the fuck did you feel the need to do that #dont project your fucking daddy issues onto me especially when you're literally two fucking years older than me get a fucking grip #anyway i think sometimes my brain is missing the FP version my bpd created of them in my head #because i miss aspects of them that RARELY if ever toward the end occured. like yknow. giving a shit about me. being there for me #or yknow not literally emotionally manipulating me for your own benefit/amusement lol #i sometimes wonder if theyll ever recognize thats exactly what they were doing whether they want to admit it to themself or not but like.#i dont care??? i realized it. so i dont really give a fuck if they ever do because?? what does that do for me?? lol??#but ive also realized that even if they hadnt been toxic as hell to me that it wouldve ended anyway because both of them despite being older #refused to grow the fuck up and mature or even like. learn. lol. they were so content to just stay the same meanwhile #i had actual responsibilities so i didnt really get the luxury of continuing to pretend to be a child lol #they just liked the attention and the benefits they got from me being an actual adult. they could use me to continue being children #theres not even anything wrong with not wanting to grow up like. if i didnt literally have to i probably wouldnt have either but.#idk you dont have to literally take advantage of the people in your life who HAVE to mature so that you can keep being a kid #sometimes. coping mechanisms. are bad.#anyway rant over dont mind me i had coffee with an expresso shot and havent slept after my 12hr shift #so that's partially what's fueling this post ngl #still all entirely true though dont misunderstand me on that one #mud rambles #for blacklisting purposes ->#rant

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bagofshinyrocks · 5 months

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Government name vs Military callsign

Prompt: What scares them worse? Addressing them by their full government name, or addressing them by their military callsign?

Featuring: Task Force 141 (CoD: MW2) - John Price, Simon "Ghost" Riley, Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, Johnny "Soap" MacTavish (separately) x GN!Reader

Word Count: 0.9k

Warnings: none

John Price

Government name.

Calling him Captain or Skipper just ends with him sauntering to where ever you are and ask (in an obnoxiously self-satisfied voice) what you wanted. Like a cat pretending it can’t hear the urgency in your tone when you say to get off the counter.

“If you want me to ‘shake a leg’, call my name, luvie.”

Now if you holler “Jonathan Price”, he’ll drop something. Either the newspaper in his hands, or his heart into his stomach. He sure as hell moves his ass with a purpose, and he’s peering into the room with an apology on his lips.

“Yes, luv? What’s wrong, poppet?”

“Lift the other end of the couch, would you?”

He does, and you shimmy it further back in the room. “Anything else I can do, love o’ my life?” He’s hovering, and gently coaxing you into his arms. Gauging how mad you were at him. You curled into him and kissed his chin. Then stepped away with a pat to his chest.

“No, sweetheart, just wanted you to shake a leg is all.”

When he remembers your previous conversation, he groans and tells you to fuck off.

Simon Riley

Military callsign.

When you two are alone, and he’s already given you permission to call him Simon, don’t call him Ghost. When you say that word, he assumes one of his mates are at the door or on the phone, and goes from Simon to Ghost. Stalks into the room with narrowed eyes, only to find you in the kitchen. By yourself.

“Ghost, you want a sandwich too? Turkey and cheese.”

“Fuck you callin’ me that for?”

Once he sees you’re alone, he swoops in and wraps around you like a hoodie. A firm kiss to your ear, then your cheek, then spun you around. Back pressed to the counter top. Settles his face right close to yours.

“We playin’ games now?” You didn’t want to upset him, so you pressed a kiss to his nose. His grumpy look faded a bit.

“Sorry, baby.” Arms wrapped carefully around his shoulders. And your fingers scratch his scalp. Another kiss to his nose. “I’m sorry for playing games with you. Simon Riley.”

Hearing his name on your lips finally cracked, and he gave you a smile. A little scar on the upper lip. You gave it a kiss, and then pressed a kiss to his lips.

A quick surge forward, and you only just had time to shove aside the things behind you before you found yourself on the countertop.

Kyle Garrick

Government name.

He doesn’t mind being called Gaz, and you’ll use Kyle and Gaz interchangeably. Doesn’t even mind if you use “Kyle” or “honey” in front of his squadmates. Though “Kylie” he does have some displeasure with.

“I’ll have you know, Soap is still calling me Kylie, you asshole.”

Call him ‘Garrick’, and he knows that you are pretending to be mad at him. He slinks over and rubs his face against your cheek. He’s too cute for you to stay mad.

If you shout “Kyle Garrick”, he comes running. He could have sworn that he put his clothes in the hamper. And did the dishes. And taken out the recycling. Damn, what was it that he forgot?

“Kyle Ga-”

“Yes, dear!” Shit, he didn’t mean to ‘yes, dear’ you. “Yes, my dear, I’m right here.”

You pause your laundry folding and summon him with a crook of your finger. Once he’s close enough, you tap your lip with the same finger. “I need a kiss.”

He blinked once. Then twice. “God damn you.” He squishes your face in his hands and gave you a quick, firm kiss. “Don’t stress me out like that. Thought you were mad.”

“Give me another kiss, or I will be.”

He rapid fire kissed your mouth, chin, and cheeks, then gave you a smack on the ass before returning to the living room.

“In my own fucking home,” he muttered.

John MacTavish

Military callsign.

He’s got some thick skin. And he’s had his name shouted angrily many a time. He would all but skip into the room with a big smile on his face. The only people who shouted that name (and wore out the scare-factor on it) were his family members. Shouting “John MacTavish” meant you loved him. You were also mad at him, but you loved him. That was more important. Even with your scowl and the gross pile of garbage he kept forgetting to take out. You loved him.

Now shouting his callsign reminded him of his superior officers.

“SOAP!”

Shit shit shit. He put down his beer and ran from the garage to the backyard. Leg brace over his sweats, low cut muscle shirt that you also wolf-whistle at when he wears. You were only weeding the garden boxes.

“JOHNNY!”

“I’m here, bonnie,” he hollered, rounding the corner. You were sitting in the dirt, a tidy pile of weeds and dead plant bits next to you.

“C’mere, c’mere.”

He leaned down next to you, hand on your shoulder and good knee on the ground. “Wassit?”

You pointed to the leaf in your hand. “A caterpillar, Johnny. An itsy-bitsy caterpillar.”

He sighed heavily and kissed your shoulder. “Bonnie, I thought something was wrong.”

“Hm?” You spared him a glance. “What are you talking about, bubba?”

“You called me Soap.”

“Did I? Didn’t mean to spook you, loverboy.” You gave him an apologetic kiss on the lips. “Just wanted you to see the caterpillar before he wiggled off.”

Posted: 2023 Dec 10

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