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normal-thoughts-official · 4 years

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Autistic Magnus headcanons

ok so i got this big submission on autistic magnus which i absolutely love and i ended up breaking it down into parts so i would remember to address it all so uh, here we go. this is long lmao

submission made by @hasenfu

oof this got long lol

before i forget: i always saw Magnus as autistic. (or rather there was a post how Alec is obv autistic but Magnus could be, too?? address that?!?!) so i thought about it and… i guess he’s had longer to adapt and do smaller fidgets, unnoticeable, more healthy -if he allows himself to do such- and other things idk. i took a break of the show+fandom shortly after and never came back to the thought much.

it was mostly being hyposensitive to pressure, which is why he has those tight vests or flowy shirts with heavy necklaces and his array of rings. (definitely a hug person and should own a weighted blanket)

but also, opposed to this, being hypersensitive to touch, so all his shirts and his bedsheets are silk. (weighted blanket can go on top or be a spell)

that truly makes so much sense to me tbh like i’ve always envisioned magnus that way as well, especially the hyposensitive to pressure part. especially considering that at the point of show canon he’s so touch starved? like he’s been keeping away from most people and kinda trying to hide and i think that only added to that. i definitely agree with what you said about the vests/corsets:

you might have a full inbox once this is done lol # idk who figured this out first but one of Magnus/Raphael found out about vests, maybe Magnus wore corsets first (yes even as cis/amab demiman/gnc cis man, people wore corsets because fashion) and then opted for vests. or Raphael wore them first because Business Man and Important Stuff and told Magnus to stop wearing flowy shit with a million necklaces and just wear tight clothing like Proper Human Beings. amazing word count is full again.

(also don’t worry i’m well aware that cis men used to wear corsets lmao i even have an old post about it lying somewhere. not that i envision magnus as a cis man but anyway) and also want to add: tight pants. like the pants he wears are always slim fit and i think that has a lot to do with that too? just feeling grounded by the pressure, like he’s more steady in his steps. especially when he’s wearing the silky shirts and etc because those have barely any pressure (esp the open shirts and stuff. i mean obviously like you said the necklaces help make up for that, but like. it’s not enough imho)

but also just like, nothing is as good as the good olde hugs tbh. i mean obviously the clothes are good and help him function and not have meltdowns or feel overwhelmed (because he’s had a lot of time to prevent having meltdowns, and tbh probably uses unhealthy tactics to avoid that) and he isn’t comfortable with just anyone touching him (we know that very well. also invasion of space not safe invasion of space not safe invasion of space not safe-) but the people he trusts? somehow they always feel right

i love magnus and the immortal squad being into cuddle piles, particularly magnus&raphael (who’s also hyposensitive to pressure, plus he’s a latino immigrant so he’s used to quite a lot of casual touching, but once he got to the US that was suddenly Not Allowed anymore and god that must have fucked him up so much, the cultural shock mixed in with the hyposensitivity and then he lost his whole support network on top of that. like he feels absolutely smothered by the lack of pressure all the time and it makes his skin prickle and he wants to just. scratch it off just to get some relief from the constant feeling of deprivation. and magnus of course feels a similar way, since from what i looked up quickly indonesian people are also used to overcrowded spaces and casual touching, plus again, touch starved)

like they’re both. kind of just functioning with this constant feeling of emptiness all around them, and they can’t really afford to be as touchy as they’d like because they’d be looked down on because of that, especially as downworlders, moc, etc. but when they’re in magnus’ loft and they’re alone? cuddling all the time. constant cuddling. not a single second goes by cuddleless. legs entangled, weight blanket over them, they might switch positions a lot because they might get fidgety - especially magnus, i feel like he needs to stim and etc a lot more than Raphael does - so at one second they’re lying down, the next they’re sitting, raphael is on top of magnus, magnus is on top of raphael, they’re side by side, only their legs are intertwined, raphael is lying across magnus….. it just keeps going and after like years of doing this they just do it effortlessly?

one of my exes called this “dynamic cuddling” cuz yeah he was a huge cuddler but also kinda fidgety and so was i and most of his other partners (i Cannot lie in the same position for a long time which is why im usually not big on cuddling, and also prefer to be the big spoon) and i definitely see it for them. just, every time one of them (again, usually magnus) moves the other moves along and they’re just adjusting to a new position together, instead of the awkward “person A starts to move so person B waits and then they do a little adjustment afterwards” thing. ragnor in particular is appalled (especially since you know, british, so used to No casual touching whatsoever, also he clearly gets overwhelmed easily considering how isolated he lives, oh look at me casually throwing in autistic ragnor lmao i need to calm tf down) at how easily they do it but that’s just years of practice, knowing each other very well, and having very similar sensory issues for you

the one downside is that since they’re too similar they both want to like, be the little spoon diahdsiah so that’s why weighted blanket is a must, even if obviously they switch - magnus is perfect for raphael because he’s bigger and taller so he can envelop him pretty easily and cover like His Whole Back and just really crowd him in the best possible way? obviously that means that raphael being small is not as good for magnus but he can be in like fetal position and hug his knees and have raphael spoon him that way, and there’s the added Compression (?) of that. plus raphael always runs his hands over magnus’ arms particularly and that adds to the good pressure and feeling. he also definitely likes playing with magnus’ hair, which magnus is delighted by (btw it’s a huge sign of closeness in indonesian culture). the scalp is sensitive, okay. it’s perfect

with alec it’s perfect for magnus because i see alec as the opposite, he does not like a lot of pressure and particularly having things on his back (he needs to be able to Move) so he likes being the big spoon. also he’s one of the few ppl who’s taller than magnus and can envelop him perfectly, just like magnus does raphael

also going briefly back to the vests thing, i really like the idea that it was raphael’s suggestion for some reason? i mean i kind of hc that magnus has had a huge influence on raphael’s style, but i also like it as the other way around. i especially like raphael helping magnus out with Autistic Problems™ because like you said magnus has had a lot of time to learn how to cope and hide his traits in order to be taken seriously, but he’s definitely foregone his own comfort in that proccess, and probably has a few coping mechanisms that aren’t really healthy. whereas raphael has a different perspective and grew up with a supportive family when it comes to that (i particularly hc rosa as being a great support in that sense, not letting anyone give him shit, giving him hugs when he needed, keeping people away when he didn’t want to be touched, speaking for him when he went nonverbal, etc) so he has a lot of better mechanisms. and i really dig him teaching those to magnus and helping him find better alternatives. like magnus knows about vests, has used corsets in that way before, why tf didn’t he think of that? because he’s used to ignoring his own needs :) but raphael helps him find good vests that make him feel, like, perfectly hugged and grounded and it’s Very Good. they probably share a lot during the time when raphael lives with him, since magnus can just magically adjust them anyway

plus other things such as not caring if magnus stims, and whatnot

i also think that he sometimes uses magic to handle the hyposensitivity problem, cause i mean, why not? especially when he’s in the flowy open shirts and whatnot, cuz again, like, the necklaces are good and they help a lot but they are Not Good Enough. but magic can make him feel more pressure and help him out with that, he can spell himself to have this kind of… constriction? that he likes. plus his magic kind of takes care of him on its own so i can definitely see it like, enhancing his sensitivity when he needs it, running over his arms and torso to keep him grounded, and whatnot. very useful, especially because he can do that unnoticed

that’s only what i had to say on hyposensitivity to pressure dear lord someone help me daiojdsoadjasodjadijaidoaj

onto hypersensitivity to textures! again strongly agree. i kind of headcanon that all of magnus’ clothes are lined with silk underneath because they always look just a little stuffy when they aren’t silky and again it’s clearly his favorite texture - for his sheets, his shirts, just everything he can is silky. i know he can probably magick them up but i like to think he has a tailor tbh, maybe some other old warlock who never really wanted to give up that work? idk it sounds more authentic and even connected to his roots this way so i like to headcanon that. anyway yeah silk everywhere and all the way. pretty much every other texture other than that and the People He Likes is kinda overwhelming for him, imo. which can be a Huge Problem and is probably connected to why he hates people he doesn’t like getting into his personal space - he’s perfected the personal space distancing so he’s kept away from the Bad Textures and anyone getting into it uninvited is definitely unwelcome and perceived as a threat to his safety and wellbeing - and effectively is

same goes for jewelry, like, he pretty much only wears silver stuff? i think it’s his preferred texture as well, which is why we don’t see him wearing a lot of different things. that might also be related to the thing you said about colors:

maybe being hypersensitive to colours/visual influence but this might be a jab at smol book!magnus with his neon leggings and crop tops. but all his surroundings are either dark: dark red, dark blue, or black, or medium brown (wood) or smallll golden accents. nothing harsh.

like golden can be too much visually and non-metal textures aren’t really welcome. this is also related to the pressure thing - metal is great for weight, whereas every other accessory material is Not - but texture also plays a good part

(also ur so valid for wanting to jab @ book magnus tbh lmao i don’t acknowledge that bitch)

but i could see him hyperfocusing on translations. oof idk i haven’t interacted with canon in months or maybe years. i’ve mostly thought about his stims. like also the scratching on paper, his tai chi exercises, making/drinking tea, brewing potions.

i also dig that? i think most of what we’ve seen in Genius Magnus Bane is related to that in some capacity - being his hyperfocus/hyperfixation/special interest. like the portal thing? definitely a result of him hyperfixating. and he just goes on and on, which is why he isn’t particularly known for like, One Area He Expertises On (okay i do realize this is more ADHD than autism but look he’s been alive for centuries okay his special interests are gonna pile up) but rather a lot of very specific things that he knows a lot about and that end up broaching a thousand different and wildly unrelated topics

and whenever he’s working on a magical thing, it’s just- hyperfocus all the way, baby. sometimes when he needs a distraction or is feeling overwhelmed he just goes straight to brewing because it’s guaranteed hyperfocus and like, silence in his head, you know? and he can just get away from whatever’s overwhelming/upsetting him for a while. not always healthy to do, but. still a thing that he does. translating, brewing potions, summoning things, even tracking - it immediately takes his undivided attention and suddenly he looks up and realizes that ah yes, he is in a place and has surroundings, and has a name lmao. even if it’s something like tracking which is really quick, while he’s at it he doesn’t think about absolutely anything else. then he kind of has to blink after a few seconds and remember why he was doing it in the first place lmao

this is probably deeply intertwined with his magic - like it is related to how he interacts and perceives the world, so when he’s using it, he’s effectively channeling all of his attention into one of his senses, and directing it to a single specific purpose. it’s like inhaling deeply. everything else shuts down and he’s just focused and directed into this action, and then that mixes up with autism/ADHD and you’ve got guaranteed hyperfocus. it can be both good and bad, but it’s definitely grounding and something that helps him cope with a lot of things - like, sensorial overload? just feeling overwhelmed in general? too angry or tired? needing a distraction. magic time! even if it’s just making a small ball of light, it definitely helps him focus a lot

which of course leads up to stimming! which you already mentioned up there and also in here

(obv he stimmt with his rings and ear piece thingy all the time because it cool. i don’t think he’d disturb the necklaces because they make up for not wearing a vest so playing with them would do not enough good to make up for the loss of pressure)

again completely agree with the necklace thing, he’s never really seen playing with those, but the earpieces/earlobes/rings? hoo boy. all the damn time, definitely a good way to stim. plus yeah, magic like i just said, but not only in the sense of hyperfocusing on purpose, but also that he just stims magically? like keeps making sparks with his fingers, or making and reshaping a ball like we’ve seen him do in that scene where him and alec fight in s2, some light hand twisting that comes mostly in the form of an almost imperceptible rub of his fingers together, did i mention random sparks? or just having like, invisible tendons of magic running over his arms, focusing on how they feel and making them keep twisting over him like a snake or something? dadiahias idk if i can describe that very well but you know what i mean, it’s just wrapped around his arm and moving and he’s stimming that way, focusing on its motions (plus again good pressure!) and whatnot

i also think he clicks his tongue to make up for rarely ever verbally stimming, but sometimes he can verbally stim with like specific spells that feel good on the tongue when he’s alone - it takes him centuries to ever allow himself to do that one in front of anyone, even if it’s pretty innocuous

I’m very interested in reading more on your posts and how Magnus is ADHD in things that don’t overlap with either ASD or (c-?)PTSD!

doijadoadsoaj and now that i’ve written this huge ass disconnected manifesto on a bunch of shit i realize that that was your question all along. great great great. this is fine

if you’re interested in ADHD magnus as a whole i definitely recommend reading @thesorrowoflizards‘s fantastic ADHD Magnus Manifesto which already features a lot of my headcanons anyway daoisjdaojdsaoi also i have both an adhd magnus tag and a general meta as well as a magnus meta tag (shut up i like keeping things organized okay) so you can read more stuff ive written on/that includes the subject if you want. but anyway! let me scramble up some particular headcanons out of my little peanut brain

ok i guess i can start with what i said about him having like, a lot of expertise on a bunch of unrelated topics that ends up on him having a curriculum that’s like. invented the portal, fluent in 14th century albanian, specialist in rattlesnake venom, healing magic, and endocrinology, knows how to build one (1) highly specific model of plane, PHD in the javanese herbal flora and a master’s in wormholes… and it just keeps going lmao

i kind of envision magnus having the type of adhd where his hyperfixations last a long time and are usually related to like, Solving A Problem or Figuring Out Something - take the portal for example. he set his mind to it, right, he wants to create teleportion! and he’s gonna hyperfocus on that and learn everything there is to learn until he figures out how to do that, and then he blinks and 10 years have passed and he’s just, like, been doing that. but now that it’s done, great! onto the next topic! and it begins again daoids

i mean over time he probably got better at managing hyperfixations and still like functioning, especially because you know, as high warlock he can’t go around getting distracted and immersed in whatever the fuck he finds fitting, but that’s definitely his natural state, so to speak. he’s naturaly curious and he likes to create and alter the world around him, so he’s drawn to sciences and inventions, but pretty much everything inside that is fair game. also languages! they are useful, especially but not just for a warlock, and uncover so much about a culture and their worldview. i can definitely see him hyperfixating on translations and languages and getting absolutely immersed in those, not stopping studying until he’s absolutely fluent, even if only in a specific dialect from a specific time lmao. it’s not like it’s a problem because as a warlock he reads a lot of ancient texts. and understanding the language means understanding the exact workings of whatever spell he’s using, so again, very useful!

also like, this is 100% projection, but jesus, time blindness. like i’m time blind as all fuck i’m the time blindest bitch i know it’s incredible, and i hc magnus as having a huge problem with that. and as an immortal, it only gets trickier. was this yesterday? was it in the 18th century? who knows! certainly not him. and after a while of immortality your notion of time is bound to get thwarped, in the same way that a year seemed like a long time when i was a kid and seems like nothing to current me - the more you live, the shorter any length of time seems to last. so he’s going to be like “this was two weeks ago” when in reality it was in the 30s. it might get him some pretty bad shocks, too, like for instance when one of his cats dies of old age - they already live so little, and the more time passes, the less that seems to be to magnus. and he might even feel guilty over that, like, i didn’t even enjoy that cat’s life, it felt to me like i found them yesterday, and now they’re gone, what kind of person am i

that’s not true of course, he’s always taken care of his cats wonderfully, but it might feel that way for him sometimes, feel like he barely registered they were there and it all passed so quickly even if that’s not really what happened

and sometimes panicking, like, how long has it been since i met (mortal)? are they close to dying? how much time do we have? how long did i spend worrying about the portal instead of being with them? and just spiralling into anxiety because he can’t trust his own perception of time and it’s like, suddenly, he doesn’t know

not gonna think about magnus waking up in the middle of the night before alec becomes immortal worried that it’s been longer than he thinks, that he thinks it’s been a few years but it’s actually been decades, and what if he turns around and finds that alec is greying and dying and he’s going to lose him without even noticing? is this going to slip through his fingers before he notices, because magnus will never forgive himself if it does. haha yeah definitely not gonna think about that, nope. i’m fine

but also just stupider things with time blindness, like being like “oh wow, did that restaurant i liked close? has it really been this long since i’ve last been here?” “hm. it says here that this has been a residential building for the last 30 years.” “has it???”

getting centuries mixed up, even if he has very obvious cues to figure out where something took place (like clothing and whatnot) but sometimes he doesn’t think of doing that and just spits out however long it feels like it has been (because like idk about other people but for me time blindness comes with a very clear sense of certainty? like i’ll be like i am absolutely, completely sure that this was a week ago. but then i look and it was two months ago or last year or when i was a kid) and it’s just wildly wrong

over time he learns to always do actual calculations in his head instead of trusting his gut so as to avoid embarrassment and even scorn - oh look i’m making myself sad again god damn it - and he becomes very quick at calculating and figuring it out from cues, like “ah this clothing is from the victorian era, this material wasn’t invented before (x year), i met this person on that year…. so it’s year x”. he kind of has annotations on that so he can keep up. he doesn’t know the years and dates because of his own memories, but from like, a history-studying standpoint lmao it’s a little wack but he manages

every once in a while tho, especially when he’s with alec or his friends, he slips up, and it’s funny. especially because alec has like. an annoyingly good memory, especially with dates, so he can say the exact date that they had a specific conversation without even thinking. so magnus will be like “alexander remember last week when you made me soto ayam?” and alec will give him that shit eating grin and be like “the last time i made you soto ayam was 3 months and 12 days ago” and magnus is just like UGGGHHH and alec makes fun of him for it lmao

but hey at least they can make up for each other’s weaknesses when it comes to that duahsda but it’s frustrating because it’s one thing that alec is effortlessly good at while magnus is very bad at, and there aren’t a lot of these - especially since magnus has had so much time and so many interests, he’s way more likely to know his way and be good with something than alec, who’s been raised in a military society where interests of any kind weren’t welcome. so it’s frustrating and by god is alec smug about it

and okay i think that’s big enough for now doaijdsaodaj i apologize for the huge incoherent ramble and also for taking so long to reply, i’m just Like This. i hope you liked my answer anyway doauhdaihdsa and thank you again for this wonderful submission, few things make me happier than getting lengthy headcanons shared with me :)

#submission #ask #hasenfu #sh #shadowhunters #magnus bane #meta #magnus bane meta #autistic magnus bane #adhd magnus bane #autistic raphael santiago #one (1) very brief mention of autistic alec #okay now it's two but tbh more if you squint #raphael santiago #brotp: i'll do whatever it takes to protect them #brief malec

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