#but honestly youre allowed to not watch grian

[theminecraftbee]

“And you don’t go touching the railgun, you hear? But you do occasionally take a lap around it so if someone tries to clean up lag again, it’ll look used,” Doc is saying, pacing around the small pile of a mattress, several sweatshirts, and a single scratchy blanket that Ren’s been staying on the past few days.

“Mhm,” Ren says.

“The bees take care of themselves, man, but you’ll refill the bee water anyway so they stick around. And the plants! If it doesn’t rain, you’ve gotta water my plants,” Doc says.

“Have it written down,” Ren says.

“And you don’t touch the elevator. If you break the elevator I will break your neck.”

“Dude, you made the button spam-proof. I don’t think I could—”

“You don’t break it.”

“Okay, okay! Don’t worry man. I’m really just here to eat ice cream and watch the Princess Diaries while you’re gone. This dog is taking a break,” Ren says, gesturing to the television he has set up in front of the bad mattress Doc had pulled out from somewhere. “I’m here to recover and relax, man, not to break your redstone.”

Doc squints at Ren.

“Besides, what are the odds you’re gone for more than a few hours? Didn’t Grian just want you to come help with some weird little thing?” Ren adds.

Doc sighs, shoulders dropping a little from where they’d been curled-back and tense. “I mean, yeah, I guess. You know I get caught up. If it’s interesting I could be out for more than a day, and I mean, you’re fine now, but—”

Ren swallows.

“Yeah, no tiny crown here. I’m all good, dude.”

“All good,” Doc says, and they smile weakly at each other.

“Have fun showing Grian what a real scientist can do! The place won’t break while you’re gone, promise,” Ren says.

“Yeah, yeah,” Doc says. “And if it does you know who will pay for it.”

“Geez, I get it! Am I at least allowed to touch the oven? I want to make some pies.”

“I can’t believe you can still eat those things, man. Yeah, sure, go for it.”

“I’ll have them waiting when you get back,” Ren promises. Doc flies off. It feels strange, like there’s more that should be said. Maybe that’s why Doc was panicking, even when he’ll probably be gone a day at most.

Ren shrugs and goes to get the ice cream out of the freezer. He’ll check in on Doc if he hasn’t heard anything after he finishes both Princess Diaries movies. Honestly, he won’t break anything, they were living together just last season…

(Later, he’ll turn over in his head just how much that interaction had been preparing for a longer goodbye, and wonder how much they’d both known, somewhere in their heads, what was about to happen. That’s later, though. Then, Ren’s still caught in his own head, admit it or not. Then, it’s not like Ren really knew what Doc had been called over for at all.)

#hermitcraft #docm77 #rendog #a bee fic #as of writing this the crossover episodes are not out yet #let’s have a fun day with that one everyone

[stiffyck]

You're a braver person than I am for talking about the Disney bit with Scar. I'm always afraid to bring up when I feel like a bit has gone too far for my comfort bc like. I KNOW that they know each others boundaries and "if it makes it into the video, it's allowed," as Grian constantly reminds people. But it's an awkward feeling when your comfort level is less than theirs, so you have to deal with it. I'm just always afraid to bring it up because even if I keep it in my own space, I'm afraid people will come at me with all of the arguments I already know. We're allowed to dislike things as long as we keep it out of Hermits spaces!

Personally, I haven't been put off by the Disney bit, but there IS a hermit who has taken his own bit too far for me, and I just had to stop watching him because he's just annoying to me now. I'm missing out on a huge chunk of story by not watching him, but that's what the recap is for!

Yea it does suck and I made sure to mention in my own post that hey! This is a ME thing. I'm not gonna go comment on the hermits videos or anything.

Yea I think some bits do get taken a bit too far for my liking but i can just not watch that person then.

I love watching scar and I love catching his streams and honestly I think it's really fun listening to him rant about Disney and star wars even tho I have no clue what he's on about. It leaves a bit of a sour taste in my mouth whenever a hermit just instantly leaves or says some comment about it sjfjrjgks

Honestly tho I might just stop watching streams if I feel like It gets me too much.

Also I've seen people being upset over mumbo this season and how like. "Rude" he's being? And I think people are definitely allowed to be upset by that or feel uncomfortable, but commenting on his or other hermits videos about this? No. Just come complain here guys djfkdkgkekg

So yeah. My stance is: You can be uncomfortable or upset about a silly bit the hermits are doing as long as you're not trying to police the hermits on what they can joke about with their friends! We don't know them personally and they're not just friends on camera but also OFF camera. They talk and they communicate. At least I think. And hope EJGKRKGKWMG

#asks

[applestruda]

hi hello im a big armor and design nerd, and was wondering if you’ve ever shared your thought process behind the boatem knights’ designs? they are all very cool and I love them

I haven't! I will say there are varying levels of thought process behind the designs, such things usually depending on how familiar i am with the hermit. I WILL ALSO SAY THAT IM NO ARMOR EXPERT IN THE SLIGHTEST! my designs are purely for fun, they're probably not completely functional or accurate.

the designs for reference

Impulse: i was generally sort of thinking that base wise, he was building this big industrial factory. while this doesn't directly transfer into a fantasy knight's design, i was thinking about how just like, tanky, his base is. like big industrial buildings equaled larger plates of armor and more overall protection in my head (im pretty sure, besides pearl, he's the most armored knight). then theres just smaller things, such as a purple collar to match his actual s8 skin and the bowtie, as well as a little decorative "i" . I also have longer trailing pieces of fabric to mimic the long coat he was wearing

Grian: he's sort of the opposite from impulse. for him i was trying to think of light armor that could still allow for flight. its why he has a lot more padded areas. (now ofc im sure his armor is still heavy and flight would be hard but hey this is fantasy im not suuupper pressed) there's a little less thoughts behind the rest of the design as it's mostly just a play on his base skin of red sweater and grey pants.

Pearl: she's probably the second most tanky knight, and honestly there's not too much of a reason for it. her armor is a lot more curved, i guess would be the word, bc to me it sort of made crescent shapes. also i dont think i necessarily had this in mind, but the scalemail segment of her armor is fun to me considering her being a moth hybrid in bkau.

Scar: in s8 scar very much sort of gave me steampunky vibes with his big swaggons, so instead of going with the usual metal armor like the rest of the knights, i figured that leather would maybe match his vibes a little more. on top of that, scar is definitely more of a ranger than a like, traditional knight in bkau, so the light weight armor was also meant to lend to that. the rest is ofc based on his s8 tycoon skin.

Mumbo: he doesn't have all that much behind his design, besides the fact that its meant to match his base suit skin a little. i think at the time i was designing him, i hadn't really watched anything of mumbo's, so i didnt quite know any specific paths to go with him. though being honest, as of now i wouldnt change much either.

anyways those are some general thoughts for the knights. there was probably more thoughts in my head when i initially designed them but i dont remember everything. hope this all made sense :]

#struda responds #boatem knights au #long post #this was verryyy rambley #oops

[roxie-roo]

Day 5: Interviews

@majickth it's finally here! Enjoy ! <3

__________________________________________________

[ The following is a transcript of notes taken from the online journal of GRIAN ████. Certain words have been removed per request, but the remaining text is otherwise unaltered. ]

I've finally managed to sit down and interview a few of the survivors of The Watchers. It's thrilling that they want to talk to me. I'm excited to see what knowledge they'll bring to my investigation, and the insight they can provide. Hopefully, and we're crossing fingers pretty tight here, it'll bring me closer to the answers I want.

I'll update when the interviews are done!

[Transcript of James Tek interview, conducted by GRIAN ████. The following is prohibited from being viewed by the public.]

G: Can you please state your name for the records?

J: Uh,, James- James Tek. Everyone calls me Jimmy..

G: How did you first come across the Watchers?

J: Honestly, it wasn't my choice.. a friend of mine got involved with them... I was in a rough patch, mentally.. it meant a lot that a friend was reaching out, with intentions to help... He introduced me to someone, Exae,, he said they'd be able to help me. If I just gave in.

G: Gave in to what?

J: To Them...

G: The Watchers?

J: .. yeah.. We were marked. Branded... Like that mark you have on your wrist.. Except more scarred over.

G: My wha-... oh... right- uh- continue.

J: It was how we proved that we "gave in" to them. We were lead away from everyone else.. weren't allowed to talk to anyone else... It was terrifying, I was alone-... scared... People tried to contact us, friends, family, our phones were destroyed so we couldn't talk to them. My friend, though? He couldn't see it like that... he thought they were helping. He was blinded by their promises. Until- of course.. that fateful day we escaped. The sacrifice, some guy I didn't know, was murdered. In cold blood... Hah... I guess that snapped him out of it. He helped me and this other guy, Martyn, get out of there... and for our efforts, Martyn got stabbed, and... poor Taurtis got blinded. Literally..

G: -.... did you say his name was Taurtis? The friend you knew?

J: Yeah.. Why- do you know him?

G: Th the name just sounded familiar, that's all- Thank you, Jimmy, that'll be all-

[End of transcript.]

[ The following is a transcript of notes taken from the online journal of GRIAN ████. Certain words have been removed per request, but the remaining text is otherwise unaltered. ]

Holy shit... I knew Taurtis was blind, I didn't think this was what happened to him. I know he's still alive and shit, but gods....

Am I in too deep with this?

[Transcript of Martyn Littlewood interview, conducted by GRIAN ████. The following is prohibited from being viewed by the public.]

"Can you please state your name for the records?"

"Martyn Littlewood, frequent visitor of the Hollow. It's almost like having a vacation home.. if vacation homes were in creepy small towns."

"How did you first come across the Watchers?"

"Like I said, I'm not from the Hollow.. But a good friend of mine lived here, so I figured I'd come see him while I was down here. Pix ran the radio station here, Hermit's Hollow Recap.."

"The radio station that burned down?"

"An act of retaliation, I think.."

"For what?"

"Not being a good enough sacrifice. Yeesh.. that sounds harsh now that I say it, huh."

"A tad, yes... tell me more about the sacrifice thing?"

"Well- see the branding here? Yeah- his was... well- less like a branding, more like a birth mark? And- and it glowed, kinda, when he was in the circle! It was freaky as hell.. But, the Watcher Spirit- or whatever they said, I tuned them out, was taking too long to possess him? So they killed him. Right then and there. He tried to fight back, tried to tell them this wasn't fair, but they killed him.... I- I watched my friend get killed.... wow-.. that's.. that's really fucked up, isn't it.."

"Very... I'm so sorry to hear about that.."

"Eh.. But- some guy, Taurtis I think, told us to run. I mean- a lot of good running did me, I got stabbed. Annoying, right? But hey- we got out of there with our lives... even if that poor Taurtis guy got his eyes gouged out- like proper gouged, it was gross, something out of a horror movie-.... sorry, you alright there? You look a bit green 'round the gills."

"I- I'm fine.. that's.. enough questions for now.. Thank you, Martyn.."

[End of transcript.]

[ The following is a transcript of notes taken from the online journal of GRIAN ████. Certain words have been removed per request, but the remaining text is otherwise unaltered. ]

I learned something rather interesting, not just about the Watchers, but in the ways that people handle trauma and being questioned about it.

While both clearly were effected by what had happened, Jimmy was more bitter and angry, making biting comments while I asked questions. Meanwhile, Martyn was more lighthearted, and tended to use dark humor to deflect his actual feelings about the events that transpired.

In the end, these interviews at the very least gave me more information about the Watchers, and allowed me to gain a bit more insight into how they have effected people who have managed to escape. This gives me at least a little hope about possibly finding these missing people.

It also presents me with a problem. Jimmy pointed out to me that I now bare the mark of the Watcher's Vessel. I've heard about what happens to these folks and it doesn't sound like fun.

Pixl Riffs, the owner of the HHR station, was.. as Martyn had said, murdered in cold blood. But that was because he "wasn't a good sacrifice". What happens if you are a good sacrifice?

Do I even want to know?

.....

Wish me luck in trying to get this off.

... I'm gonna call Taurtis.. just to check in on him.

[End of transcript.]

#roxie's writing #hermits hollow au #sorry it took so long Magick <:[ #but it's here!

[hybbart]

Besides the ranchers who would you say are some of your favs to draw? Also are there any other pairings/ships your particularly invested in?

I love drawing Pearl and Scott, even though Scott can be hard to draw sometimes, and I really liked drawing Stress the one time I have but I don't watch her enough to end up drawing her casually. I also love drawing Zed cause I allowed him to be my one self indulgent design and made him into a cutesy faun boy with bright colours!

As for ships (and assuming you mean mcyt)... well if you mean romantic, honestly there's ones I tolerate but I wouldn't say I ship them. Like I tolerate desert duo, joel/lizzie, xbralis, dogwood(? Is that what its called?), and homwreckers if they show up, but I rarely if ever seek them out. Its more of a 'I don't dislike it enough to filter it out' situation.

Also obviously I'm not really a multishipper, I barely can like even one ship. I'm very much the sort of person that where there's a love triangle my answer to it is usually 'neither' rather than 'both' or even 'pick', if you get what I mean.

I joke that my crack ship is doc/zed but I dunno if I'd say I actually ship it.

If we're talking familial and platonic ships I got plenty, like grian, pearl, and jimmy, seablings, soup group, or cleo and scott. Boat boys and ZIT especially. I also really love Grian and Impulse, they deserve more love their dynamic is so adorable and silly. Tango and Pearl, too. Tango has a very specific godfather type dynamic with the younger hermits (pearl, gem, mumbo, and grian in particular) that always makes me happy.

#ask

[quaranmine]

Hi yeah its me again, sorry for the spam, not my fault you made cool and inspiring stuff. This time actually, i couldnt help myself and have made a short crackpodfic of an alternative universe which is basically 'AU where Mumbo is frolicking in the wild and Grian doesnt exist cause itd be too sad for him to do so, so hes gone.' Its stupid, ist badly written (literally my first ever creative writing work other than a 300 word school asignment) but like idk. if you dont want to or cant read it (cause its so bad and burns your eyes out) you can just not read it xd idc honestly but decided to maybe give you the choice of reading it or not. Excuse my weird and unusual ways of writing dialougue and monolouges This is part 1 of 3

Jellie meowed cutely, demanding for food most likely just as a familar figure walked into his cabin. —Oh Hello Cub! It's wonderful to see you again! How was the trail, you're earlier than usual, no? — Scar exclaimed happily, looking at the sweaty man now standing before him. The air was hot, the many glass windows of the watchtower could make a great greenhouse. The open windows allowed for a warm flow of the early summer's air to pass by and refresh the mostly closed space. —Hey hey. Yeah the traffic was better than usual, but there was more sand in on the trail today. I think it could be the Sahara desert dust that was supposed to get carried in with the wind. — Cub said, taking his backpack off and pulling out a rag to wipe his head off. No matter how many times he hikes through this trail it never gets much easier. — Oh, Cub. The Sahara desert was blowing on Europe! And also it's the 80s and this specific situation you're referencing is gonna happen in late March of the year 2024! That's at least 35 years into the future! —Oh yup I forgot. Sorki bout that —Cub, you silly silly man! — Scar said in a singsong tone. Both of them started laughing and looked straight into the readers eyes, smiling.  Hi reader they both thought and went back to laughing looking at each other. — Actually, Scar, while hiking I heard some tourists talking about some newfound cryptid roaming these parts, what's up with that? – Eh nothing special, some bikers saw a 'humanoid lanky bugman' or something. — The man said — I've seen it all over, people come, they see a black bear or a deer in the shadow and think it's a newfound species. But honestly! I gotta give credit to the bikers relating said encounter cause the guys were better than most at storytelling! The missing food cans, rustling in the bushes all around them, the feeling of being watched.. Truly creepy stuff! And then — Scar took in a breath, talking so much in one long exhale left him almost dizzy —the moment when they saw it fully...They described it as 'particularly lanky with black fur' and something about purple-pinkish fingertips as well as residue on its paleish naked face with a weirdly shaped snout. 'Like a Walrus' they said! A crazy comparison for a bear, but you know, human mind can do wonders! — Scar clapped at the last statement and closed his eyes smiling charmingly at his companion who was now drinking the rest of his water.. After a while, comfortable silence filled the watchtower as both of the men enjoyed eachothers company. Jellie was now purring against scars leg and promptly jumped on his lap demanding more pets as Cub had finally spoken up — Any new paintings done in the meantime? I don't recognise these two, are they new or recycled? — He asked, curiosity clear in his voice, lookin at the, indeed, two new paintings decorating the cabin. One of them depicting a landscape with a sunset. From where Cub was sitting, he could watch the same, now hidden under an overcast, mountains and trees. The other painting was of a group of three tufted titmice sitting on a branch. Cub took out his American bird field guy and read a couple of paragraphs to scar on what kind of bird has he drawn exactly. It's weird that he saw these birds cause apparently they don't live in that part of the US! Crazy.

HELPPPPP this is completely insane the best way, thank you. Love that Grian doesn't exist here because it'd be too sad for him. Love the fever-dream quality to the writing. In all the best ways you're taking me back to the crack fics I'd read on ff.net in 2013, it's great. Love the breaking the fourth wall abou the Sahara dust and the (assuming) European birds. You've got a certain hint of Douglas Adams flavoring happening with the switching to an "above" perspective for a moment to give a wry little fourth-wall comment.

Mumbo Jumbo, new forest cryptid. I can see it. If Hermitcraft!Mumbo eats redstone, do you think forest cryptid!Mumbo would eat like...rocks??? dlfjskfljslkfs

#i was ignoring this on purpose i promise i just wanted to sit down to read + respond #this was very funny thank you #hc_firewatch_au #quara asks #ngl your writing here reminds me a bit of my first chapter draft of my hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy au #wherein (former) ceo mumbo of boatem says something about 'work from home being the future' #before essentially remembering none of them work from home because. well. it's boatem.

[choco-bloop]

HC Girls Headcanons <3 (because honestly the five of them r a fun BroTP)

There has probably been at least one halloween event where they just showed up in Ghostbusters outfits and began playing the song all while trying not to burst into laughter from the sheer ridiculousness of it

They share like 5 braincells but 90% of the time 3 go to Stress, one goes to False and the last is shared between Cleo, Gem and Pearl

Can and will beat anyone's asses if asked, although how varies from PVP (False, Gem, Pearl), to Attempted PVP that ends in a lecture (Stress), or straight up sarcasm right in your face (Cleo)

After Pearl's secret Santa to Cleo they now just occasionally dress up as each other to prank everyone else, the main targets are Scar and Grian. Usually it's Gem, Pearl and Cleo going around causing the chaos. Stress just watches because it's funny and False doesn't want to because she's had more than enough of that with her twin

Speaking of twins, the girls know that False has a sibling but that's about all she'll tell them. Gem knows its E!False while Cleo only knows whoever the sibling is is on Empires

Stress has tried getting the other three into Vault hunters but the one time they did try it ended in them all hiding behind False when they found an elite. (Cleo had been sitting next a spawner the entire time watching it unfold because the mobs wouldn't attack her)

Girls nights weekly! AKA where they gossip about the others and share funny moments that happened. (Note: prior to the whole False rift stuff the two Falses alternated between who went each time and updated the other)

Stress is the one who makes the food for these Girls' nights and the deserts too. Pearl specifically only knows how to make soup and nothing else (even then her soup is not to be trusted). Cleo and False are banned from the kitchen (Cleo has absolutely no cooking skills and False would rather use a sword than a knife). Gem is only allowed to enter to do the garnishing, no cooking for her either

#headcanons #hermitcraft #falsesymmetry #geminitay #pearlescentmoon #zombiecleo #stressmonster101

[wren-kitchens]

old feelings, new love

I just liked the idea lmao

“tango?” jimmy asks.

“mm?” tango looks up.

“can you feel that?”

tango frowns. “feel what?”

“it feels like.. achy here.” jimmy puts his hand on his chest. “I don’t know why.”

“yeah, i kinda can. maybe I pulled a muscle when I was building?” tango suggests.

“yeah, maybe.” jimmy nods.

they’re sitting on the grass outside their newly-built ranch. they’re watching the happenings across the valley. etho, joel, scar and grian are all on top of the pillager outpost. from the looks of things, they’re trying to use the pillagers as a defence mechanism, but it’s not going well. grian has an arrow in his eye.

but for some reason, jimmy keeps glancing down at tango. he doesn’t really know why, but he likes looking at him.

tango shifts slightly, leaning closer to jimmy, and the weird aching feeling gets worse. or, he supposes, better. it’s not a bad feeling, after all.

“woah, yeah, I think I sprained a muscle.” tango says when jimmy moves closer to him in turn. “that’s weird. I didn’t think you could sprain a muscle in your chest.”

“maybe it’s if you’re doing heavy lifting?” jimmy suggests. “i know i’ve felt this before but I can’t remember where.”

“probably.” tango says. “I did spend quite a while building.” he points out. “heavy lifting sounds about right.”

“you should probably rest then.” jimmy says. “sleep in tomorrow morning.”

“I don’t think that’ll be too hard.” tango grins.

jimmy laughs. “well, you never know with this server. someone could get a screaming goat right outside the ranch.”

“at least we could get horns then.” tango points out.

“ooh, actually that’s a good idea.” jimmy says. “why don’t we just get some goats and breed them? tomorrow, of course.”

“that could work.” tango agrees.

they let their conversation lapse into comfortable silence as they watch the other side of the valley. they’ve added a water stream and now there are at least five pillagers climbing up it. instead of doing anything, grian and joel are just watching them.

jimmy looks down at tango again, almost studying his face. he’s handsome, there’s no denying that. the corners of his mouth twitch upwards as he watches the group on the pillager outpost flailing around. it’s weirdly cute.

“you know, apparently scar hasn’t realised he’s soulbound to grian.” tango says.

jimmy is glad for the excuse to look at tango. “hasn’t he? have they not been taking damage or something?”

“no, they have.” tango chuckles. “scar just hasn’t noticed.”

“i’d laugh, but it sounds like something i’d do.” jimmy jokes. “honestly, if we hadn’t found out so early on, I probably wouldn’t realise for ages.”

“i’m still sorry about that.” tango looks up at him. “I know you always die first.”

“what?” jimmy has to take a second to realise what tango means. “oh! tango, you don’t need apologise for that! it wasn’t even your fault.”

“I know, I know.” tango says. “doesn’t stop me feeling bad about it.”

jimmy puts a wing around tango in what he hopes is a comforting way. tango smiles and leans into him.

“your wings are soft.” tango says, rubbing his cheek against them.

“you feeling better?” jimmy smiles. there’s a weird feeling in his stomach— it’s familiar for some reason, but he can’t think what it reminds him of.

“of course i am.” tango says.

jimmy laughs as tango snuggles into him. “you’re fluffy!” he defends. “i’m allowed to hug you.”

jimmy puts his arm around tango. “i’m not complaining.” he says.

tango’s face flushes. jimmy supposes he must be warm with his wings around him.

they sit in comfortable silence for a little while. the pillager outpost has been abandoned by the looks of it, and the group has split back off into the soulbounds. apparently, scar still doesn’t know.

jimmy turns to the side to look at their ranch. the inside of the ranch is cooler than the outside, with slight draughts if you get too close to a wall, and there’s a distinct creaking sound coming from the tower above. jimmy doesn’t care. it’s home.

home.

that word is familiar. he doesn’t know how, but it has something to do with the feelings in his chest and stomach. they’re linked, in some way, and he has a very strong sense that he should be able to remember why.

he feels something around his waist and he looks down to see that tango has wrapped his tail around him. jimmy smiles, pulling tango closer to him.

“you comfy?” jimmy teases.

tango mumbles something that sounds like, “mhm.”

“aww, are you tired?” jimmy laughs.

tango nods. “can I sleep on you? you’re soft.”

both the aching in his chest and the weird feeling in his stomach intensify. “uhm- yeah.” jimmy says, flustered. “yeah, of course.”

“you sure?” tango asks. “it’s fine if not— I can sleep inside.”

“you can.” jimmy says. why is his heart beating so fast?

tango gives him a smile and rests his head on jimmy’s shoulder, closing his eyes. it doesn’t take long for his breaths to start slowing, and he soon drops off.

jimmy starts to stroke tango’s hair, watching joel building across the ravine. from the looks of things, he’s building a ship. away from the ravine with water in it. he isn’t entirely sure how to react.

he keeps falling off, and each time he does, he takes damage a second after the initial fall. one time when this happens, he grabs the communicator from his inventory and sends,

<smallishbeans> ETHO

<smallishbeans> STOP IT

a second later:

<etho> stop taking damage then

<smallishbeans> you’re gonna kill us i’m on one heart

<etho> eat

joel shoves his communicator back into his pocket and takes out steak, eating it in a very exasperated way.

“hi tim!” grian says, appearing in front of him.

jimmy starts, then remembers tango. “shh! he’s sleeping.” he gestures to the sleeping man on his side, like it wasn’t already obvious.

“that is adorable.” grian notes, but he speaks quieter. “so are you two dating?”

“what?!” jimmy’s voice comes out as a squeak. he clears his throat. “no, of course not. why would you even think that?”

grian gives him a withering look. “take a wild guess.”

“okay, fair, but still.” jimmy says. “we’re not dating.”

“would you like to be dating?” grian grins.

“no!” jimmy exclaims.

“okay, okay.” grian raises his hands in surrender. “i’m just asking cause this is how you acted around scott in third life.”

and oh. scott. of course.

how could he have forgotten? the aching isn’t a pulled muscle, and the weird feeling in his stomach isn’t the result of raw meat. he’d felt these things before, ages ago, with scott.

he likes tango.

“oh.” jimmy says. it’s all he can think to say. “oh no.”

“oh yes!” grian says happily. “timmy’s got a crush!” he says, singsong.

“keep it down!” jimmy says desperately.

“dude, tango is literally sleeping on you. with his tail wrapped around you.” grian says. “I think he likes you too.”

“well I don’t know, do i?” jimmy says. “i’ve never really talked to him before. I don’t know if he’s just cuddly.”

grian blinks at him. “you were here for last life, right?”

“I died, remember?” jimmy says, extending a wing. “canary and all that.”

“okay, well long story short, that’s not platonic.” grian says. “good luck, I only came here to scare you.” and he walks off.

jimmy watches him leave, then looks back down at tango, who is still fast asleep. he hesitates, then leans down slightly and kisses his forehead.

no one has to know.

#endings /neg #would you believe this took me two days #im embarrassed honestly #team rancher #ranch duo #rancher duo #double life ficlet #double life smp

[whumpy-wyrms]

are u in any fandoms? what are ur interests besides whump? u don’t have to answer i’m just curious!!

someone’s asking me about my interests i can’t NOT answer

this got a bit long tho so i’m putting it under the read more for people who don’t care/are only here for the whump

OKOK. so i’m kinda in the starkid/nerdy prudes must die fandom rn but i know for a fact if i finished adventure time and started watching fiona and cake, that would quite literally become my entire personality for the next 3 months because simon and prismo (and marceline and princess bubblegum and all my other favorite characters) make me insane. but i haven’t done that because well. i’ve gotta write tllr yknow..

anyway, my absolute most favorite pieces of media of all time are undertale and deltarune guys. i cant put in words how much those games mean to me holy shit. as i’m writing this i’m sitting next to my jevil and sans and spamton plushie and they are saying hi. anywayyy yeah i was in the deltarune fandom for a bit it was fun. spamton is silly fucked up creature. jevil is my all time favorite tho

AND THE MAGNUS ARCHIVES… my favorite thing ever fr. y’all. LISTEN TO TMA SERIOUSLY YOU’LL PROBABLY LIKE IT!! it’s a horror podcast and it’s seriously the best fuckinf thing ever it’s so amazing seriously. it’s a bit hard to get into at first because season 1 is less story driven BUT HOLY SHIT. AHHHH ITS SO FUCKING GOOD. jon is one of my favorite blorbos ever and so is michael because he’s a silly distortion guy. just trust me and listen to TMA it will actually change your life.

also i love the amazing world of gumball so fucking much. i wasn’t allowed to watch cartoon network as a kid (idk why??) so i first watched tawog last year and holy shit holy shit it’s my favorite thing ever. rob. ROB!!!! ROB IS MY ALL TIME FAVORITE CHARACTER. SO IS MR SMALL. AHHHH!!!! anyway i love tawog i’ve drawn a lot of fanart and even wrote a 60k word fanfiction (about what happens after The Inquisition because that ending fucked me up) that i’ve Never and will probably never show anyone because it’s probably Not that good. but it was sooo Important to me back then. tawog just means so much to me it :))) it changed me as a person. nobody’s a nobody and everybody is weird like you and me.

i also really like hollow knight! i haven’t played it in a while but i was at 111% completion on one of my playthroughs (CURSE YOU PANTHEON 4). i’m also super fucking excited for silksong obviously and i will say this now: WHEN SILKSONG FINALLY RELEASES… i will probably go on hiatus here LMAO. sorry but guys. SILKSONG…. honestly same for new deltarune chapters. the second chapters 3, 4, and 5 release it is sooo over for me. i probably won’t post much here for a few months during that. but that’s fine!! i’ll never abandon tllr but sometimes some things are more important to my silly little brain :3

gravity falls quite literally changed my life in 2018. like i can’t even explain it, but it’s how i was introduced to online fandoms and fanart in general. dipper LITERALLY made me trans (not literally but pretty much). it’s how i started watching other amazing cartoons and series i love, it’s literally what made me get into drawing art and writing and stuff. it’s what made me start making ocs. it literally made me an artist guys. which is how i started writing. without gravity falls and it’s effect it had on me, this account might have never existed?? i’m being super dramatic but wowww. i was so autistic about that silly cartoon

minecraft i love. i’ve been playing minecraft for over a decade and won’t stop because it’s like, probably a special interest of mine? i’ve watch minecraft youtubers forever too, hermitcraft and the life series are my favorite. i’m a huge grian fan too, been watching him since the evo days. anyway if u play minecraft and wanna play with me sometime, feel free to ask!!! :D i love making new friends and playing video games with people!!! let’s make a world together!!!

also i like terraria and stardew valley, and animal crossing new horizons but i haven’t played that in a few years. hmm other games i like are oneshot game, NITW, omori, celeste, cuphead, fnaf (although i’ve only played the first 5 games and am super super behind on the lore), ori, dead cells, untitled goose game (this is for u anon), and probably more i’m forgetting! feel free to recommend me some video games and we can even play together :3

other series i love are the umbrella academy. soooo autistic about this show it’s fucking AMAZING!!!!!! klaus is my favorite character. anyway i also like what we do in the shadows. it made me super autistic about vampires (before i watched this show i kinda thought vampires were cringe IDK WHY I’M SORRYY). the netflix show lucifer made me insane a few years ago and is what probably indirectly inspired me to give Dew wings. i also like our flag means death, breaking bad, moon knight, and camp here in there (another podcast i HIGHLY HIGHLY recommend, will wood made the soundtrack!)

i LOVEEE FINAL SPACE!! avocato has been my pfp on this account forever and now i feel like i can’t ever change it (i don’t want to). final space is seriously amazing!!! but it was cancelled and basically got fucked over by the networks- infinity train style. idk, stuff happened and it was removed from hbo max so there’s not really anywhere to watch it (legally) except for netflix international iirc? but it’s getting removed from that too i think. super fucking sad :( it ended on a huge cliffhanger too BUT there is a graphic novel being made!!!! super excited about that!

other cartoons i like are over the garden wall (dressed up as wirt for halloween last year), the owl house, adventure time, regular show, steven universe, infinity train, bojack horseman, rick and morty, mlp, the midnight gospel, and so much more i’m forgetting. OH anime i like are death note, demon slayer (haven’t caught up yet on the latest seasons tho), and MOB PSYCHO 100!! vampire in the garden on netflix is really amazing as well.

this is sooo long but now i gotta talk about my favorite music artists. WILL WOOD (AND THE TAPEWORMS) IS MY FAVORITEEE. I ALSO LOVEEE JHARIAH!!! AND HARLEY POE!!!!! top three of all time. i also like toby fox obviously, and glass beach (LITERALLY GOING TO SEE THEM IN MARCH AND I AM SOOO EXCITED!!!), mcr, shayfer james, weezer, mitski, lemon demon, set it off, tally hall, gerard way, and probably more i’m forgetting. i also like musicals!! (i was in the spongebob musical earlier this year for school! i was larry the lobster :))

so guys. GUYSSS. IF YOU LIKE MUSICALS, GO WATCH NERDY PRUDES MUST DIE!!!! OR JUST WATCH THE ENTIRE HATCHETFEILD TRILOGY!!! WHILE UR AT IT, WATCH ALL THE STARKID MUSICALS ACTUALLY!!! this is my current hyperfixation. the lords in black are amazing, npmd is amazing. i love everything about it. go watch it seriously, it’s fucking awesome and the soundtrack is AMAZING!!!

i think this is it. this got super long but i’m super passionate about my interests so yeah. this is pretty much everything. one very important thing (literally my special interest) that i didn’t mention are my other ocs. i have wayyy more ocs that are completely separate from the tllr ones. i don’t wanna post about them here though, cuz they’re not whump related and i want to keep my main account separate from this account. but they’re my favorite blorbos in existence so…

if u WANT to know about my other ocs, u can feel free to dm me for the username of my other fandom/oc account. that’s where i post other stuff that i don’t post here, like my fanart and my other oc stuff. i don’t post writing or anything like that there, so ur not missing out on that.

anyway those are most of my main interests! things i didn’t mention that im also really interested in are reptiles (snakes specifically), and animals in general. i have two leopard geckos named Lars and Alphys and i reallyyyy want a pet snake but my family hates snakes :(( anyway i’m rambling

thanks for the ask!!

#ask

[literaphobe]

a lot of mcc'c audience (but not the majority) doesnt agree that the enjoyment of the event comes from watching passionate competitive players do well and win. If I decide to watch someones vod and the first thing they say is "we didnt practice at all LOL" then I dont want to watch because it seems like they dont care about the event. Illumina is an incredible player but I once watched sot from his perspective and holy shit it was so boring mainly because everyone in the team was so quiet, almost no comunication, no strategy nothing no chemistry, like, I'm sure they were having fun and wanted to team but there was zero excitment.

The problem is that the few people who are competitive/practice and strategize, win a lot (dream and sapnap are the best two examples, purpled might be up there soon) but everyone else (and their audiences) cries about it saying "oh the same people win everytime, its boring!!" but like, if your streamer cared and practiced and got better, they would win, simple as that.

So, imo, mcc tries to please the annoying crybabies by adding non-competitive people on the event-> less likely to have cool interesting moments-> less likely to care about mcc gameplay/skill-> even when they win, its boring

Just to clarify, you're allowed to not like competitiveness, Im not very competitive myself, but if, as a player you say "I'm here to have fun and if I win then cool", you have no right to cry about other teams doing well. If I have the skills that sapnap has, I'll be happier winning against fruitberries than winning against grian (GRIAN IS FINE, I'M just saying skillwise he is not an s-tier, and he doesnt have to be). I'd much rather lose to tryhards than win an event where I was the only one who tried.

To me it comes down to passion and genuine interest in minecraft skill, if mcc adds less cracked players, it shouldnt be a championship- it should just be an event.

Also, there are issues with team creation, there sooo many cool ideas and then scott comes up with a random reason as to why some people cannot team and honestly its frustrating, I'd rather you please your audience by giving them a team/duo that they ask for than banning memorising the builds at buildmart, you know? Some rules are kinda dumb.

Tldr, people who claim they play just for fun(and their viewers) show negativity to people who play competitively when those people win, and that is just annoying

honestly. like… the truth is. mcc has become much more competitive. the unfortunate thing is that some people don’t wanna admit it? to the point where there are people who don’t try and then get upset when they don’t win. like. its a different case for players who are put there specifically to nerf and get fucked bc of underpowered teams, tina’s a good example. as much as i wish she wouldn’t sit out mccs on purpose, i completely get where she’s coming from. it feels hella embarrassing to fall so far behind, to feel like a heavy weight dragging your team down. and tina deserves better than that!!

also yeah… i mean to be honest. sapnap doesn’t even practice for mcc, he’s just good. dream is a mix between doesn’t practice vs practices heavily and strategizes actively with teammates. but yeah. team balancing just needs to be fair? op teams are a fun interesting idea and honestly i hope theres an op mcc one day just to see crazy team ups but honestly i think i just miss seeing him play maybe i dont care about anything else idk

#ask #mcc reddit

[thatreallyminecraftsmygender]

On the one hand, I'm really irritated by Grian stealing center stage again, distracting everyone from literally everyone else, but on the other hand... Actually I can't think of anything positive about this. Everyone is having fun I guess?

I'm going to come at this from the angle of hermits as content creators

I think grian/charles is just the sort of person who is Good at captivating and maintaining an audience, as both a content creator and among the hermits - people tend to orient themselves around what he's doing.

Whatever he does, people are going to pay attention, so I think that creating storylines that included lots of different hermits is a good thing for him to do

I can understand why that might be frustrating to see - especially if you think other hermits deserve more attention - but ultimately there's pretty much nothing people like grian and mumbo could do that wouldn't have disproportion audience and wouldn't, in someway, incentivies the other hermits to pay attention. Paying attention to then as content creators makes sense, because they have a Lot of away over a Large audience. People can choose to not participate (zedaph comes to mind for the last few arcs) but it is a smart to participate, it's content that comes with eyes to watch.

Attention is a 2 way street, sure grian does things that garner attention, but other people have to decide to look and stay and join in. Which the hermits and audience often do.

It can be hard to watch if you think someone is trying to overshadow someone's hard work, especially if that person often gets overshadowed, but the fact of the matter is, grian has a big shadow no matter what he does. He's going to draw attention to things, he's going to become a central character, even if he tried to take a back seat.

I think the way he spins stories is really well done, especially because he tries to involve as many other people as possible because the more people participating the more smaller channels will get more views. It can be frustrating if you don't like the plotlines or you don't like grians content, or it's not what you want to see from the hermits, but I think framing it as grian deliberately taking center stage isnt helpful

So it might be easier to see this upcoming hermitcraft plotline, as less grian trying to steal attention but grian already having attention and trying to channel it productively. He will have power no matter what he does, hes just trying to make interesting plotlines with lots of hermits involved.

The way I've avoided these sentiments festering is just, not watching grian. Honestly, he makes great things but he's not for me and I've found it much easier to feel okay now that I watch a different circle of hermits. There are people who don't involve themselves with his stuff directly. Zedaph, xB, hypno, tfc, etho, ECT ECT they may get a bit involved later down the line but there will be people who aren't that interested, and you can seek solace in them. That's what I did with Zedaph during demise and now look at me!

If you wanna talk more anon feel free to message me and we can chat, it's hard to explain in a monologue rather than a dialogue

#honestly i think grian and tango actually have verh similar roles jn hermitcraft. #tango mentioned recently thst a lot of the things he does are specifically so other hermits have thinfs tk make content abkut and with #grian does the same. #he judt prefers to stsy more involved #if there isna whole server event and grian or mumbo js involved theyre going to be center stage they just have the biggest ahdiences #and grian is a story teller #the stories he tells sre going to get attention #its less a delibrate act ajd more aj outcome of youtube #its fine to be upset i found it hard during demise to see people pay attention to people i thought wete deliberately overshadwoing #but honestly youre allowed to not watch grian #i dont watch him. hes not for me i think he does amazing stuff but hes not my cup of tea anymore #and im really excited tos ee where this goes! this will be a fun plotline hopefully! #meta #negative #ask z #long #its a sentiment people share with you i knoe they do #and kts really understandable #but maybe this perspective will help it feel less acidic when you think about it #grian

[theminecraftbee]

You dont have to do this, but you have teased a game of truth and dare for a while and i would really like to read it. You can make a lot of things very funny and a bit of laughs would be great before the next mental breakdown! Not that i mind the breakdown and the creeping sense of dread that has been slowly taking over boatem

"Alright," Grian says. "If we're doing this - and unfortunately I think we've finally reached the point we're doing this - we need to set rules. We may be playing Truth or Dare like schoolchildren, but we aren't animals."

There's a long, very loud pause as everyone takes that in.

"Technically," Pearl starts.

"We aren't animals," Grian says very definitively.

"I mean, he is right," Mumbo says. "If we're being technical, I'm pretty sure that whatever we are probably isn't an animal, in the strictest sense of that word. So he is right. Probably."

The five members of Boatem float through the void, or are one with the void. Eh, details. There's Truth or Dare to be played! Scar watches them argue, fascinated. He looks over at Grian and then looks back to Mumbo and Pearl. "You know, I'm beginning to get the sense I know why we have never managed to get to the part where we actually play yet," he says. "And like, guys, it's definitely been weeks, at least. Or months."

"Possibly years," Grian says.

"If it's been more than a year, I think I'm legally allowed to kill all of you the moment that won't make me start crying," Mumbo says.

"Oh god, we're doomed. Killing things makes him laugh, not cry," Pearl says.

"RULES," Grian says, somehow managing to emphasize the word as though it has three syllables instead of one. "How is it that I keep on being the voice of reason? The only reason I was agreeing to play this is because I want to make Scar do something really stupid!"

"Hey!"

"Would you pick truth?"

"No, that's the coward option, but -"

"My point stands."

Scar huffs, but doesn't argue.

"Alright then! Rules!" repeats Grian. "They're simple! If you can't do a dare, you can take the truth, or vis versa, but then you have to do whatever you're given. After your turn, you give whoever you want the next truth and/or dare, but you can't just retaliate against whoever made you do something, that's boring. If you lie, Mumbo gets to kill you, and if you chicken out, Mumbo also gets to kill you. Any questions?"

"Yeah. How do we lose?" Impulse asks.

"That's the neat part: the game never ends," Grian says.

"Oh, fun," Impulse says.

"I like this idea," Mumbo says darkly.

"Er, not that I don't want to play infinite truth or dare, that does sound delightful," Pearl says, "but what if, uh, after you've done at least three rounds yourself, you can choose to end the game instead of asking another question?"

Scar feels such relief as he shakily nods. Yes. Good rule. Pearl is his new favorite. Pearl is definitely his new favorite.

"Fine," Grian says, pouting. "But that means we can't target someone! They'll just end the game!"

"It's a good rule we're keeping it alright how do we decide who goes first?" Scar says, very quickly, determined to prevent Grian from talking anyone out of changing that rule before he could presumably make Scar's life hell. Why him, huh? Mumbo's right there! Mumbo's even got a funnier name, and reacts all silly to pranks! He's like, just as fun to mess with as Scar is!

Honestly, Grian, bullying behavior.

"I'll go first!" Impulse says cheerfully.

"Why do you get to go first?" Mumbo asks suspiciously.

"I mean, were you going to dare me?"

"...no."

"Was anyone else?"

"You honestly just feel like a bad first -"

"There we go!" Impulse says, smiling. "Any objections?"

It seems, for a moment, that Grian may try to object. However, it seems that even Grian finally wants to actually play. Technically, this isn't the first time they've had this rules conversation. It isn't even the second. Heck, it isn't even the third. It's, uh, more like the fifth? The first time they'd tried to play truth or dare was way back before they even realized anything was more wrong than the apocalypse, in fact! Man. Those had been wild times. They'd just normally descended into in-fighting before this point, or descended into pointless arguments about what a "valid dare" would be, given that none of them could easily do anything back then. But now all of them can move! So...

"Alright then. Scar. Truth or dare?"

"Oh come on!" Scar says loudly.

"Well?" Impulse says. "This is one more round Grian can't get you, you know."

"Fine. Dare."

"Lick Grian," Impulse says promptly.

Everyone stares for a moment. Pearl is the first one to speak. "Is that... the best you can...?"

"I mean, yeah," Impulse says. "What did you think I was going to say? We're in the void, I can't do half of my fun ideas! Unless you want me to dare him to lick Pancake instead?"

"That's worse, that's worse, just come lick me," Grian says.

Scar stares at Grian, shrugs, approaches him, and licks his face in a long stripe. It tastes like face. Actually, like weird face. Like the platonic ideal of a face, more than a real face. Not that Scar's licked that many faces, that's not a thing he goes around doing, he licks diamonds! Not faces! Those are different, and man, is he glad he's not talking out loud right now.

Grian rubs furiously at where Scar licked him. "You know, technically you didn't lick me."

"I know! So you don't have to worry about it," Scar says, as Grian continues to furiously wipe his face.

"Ugh," Grian says.

"Anyway! Truth or dare, Grian!"

"Oh, come on, now I can't go for you!"

"It's your rules."

"Truth."

Scar blinks several times. He looks at Grian sideways. "Who are you and what have you done with Grian?"

"You're going to dare me something really stupid so I'm choosing truth to head it off at the pass," Grian explains.

"Still. Anyway. Uhhhh. What kind of bird are you?"

"Don't know. Scar, I've told you I don't know. Also, wait, if we were being technical earlier, am I even a bird anymore?" Grian clearly stops to think about it. His wings flutter uselessly behind him, as though some subconscious thought in Grian requires he move them whenever he's thinking about them. This, of course, had been Scar's real goal. Grian literally always does that when talking about his wings. Scar's just got to get him talking a little more.... "I mean, I still think of myself as a bird. Or, a bird-person, at least."

"A birson," Scar says. 'Yes, we're aware."

"I... a... yeah, okay, sure. But, like, we've established our current general non-person-ness." Grian flutters his wings a little more. Mumbo hasn't noticed yet. Just a little more. "So, you know, my wings here, they're probably just -"

He stretches his wings. They smack Mumbo in the face.

"GRIAN!" Mumbo says.

"...SCAR," Grian says in turn.

"I didn't do anything," Scar says, lying entirely, as Grian, now flustered, tries to get his wings back in control. It really is fascinating, Scar thinks - technically, he knows, if they all squint, Grian doesn't have wings! Or, he has wings? Or, uh, he has the void-y perception of wings? The point is that, technically, Grian isn't Grian-shaped anymore. And yet, even his most annoying instincts are still all right there, ripe for Scar to use against him! It's hilarious!

Grian, meanwhile, is clearly fed up. "Fine then. Mumbo. Truth or Dare, if you're so annoyed!"

"Why, I think I'll take dare!"

"I dare you to shut up about my wings!"

"That's stupid. Why are we only coming up with stupid dares?"

"Well? Are you gonna?"

"I'd rather lick them."

"No one else is licking me!"

The two of them begin to argue about the dare. Scar turns to Impulse. "Hey, Impulse, do you think that counts as Mumbo refusing the dare? You know, if Mumbo cheats, does that mean Mumbo has to kill Mumbo? Since Grian said Mumbo's doing the killing in our rules."

"I really don't know," Impulse says, as Grian very purposefully smacks Mumbo with another wing as Mumbo lunges at him. "I think Mumbo's doing his best to kill Grian, though."

"Maybe we should stop him," says Pearl, sounding entirely disinterested.

"Nah, they'll get over it," Impulse advises. "They haven't actually killed each other yet."

"No, I mean, so we can keep playing. I don't care if Mumbo manages to succeed in, uh. Pulling enough feathers to never complain again? It was unclear. But I want to keep playing, I haven't had a turn yet! We'd barely gotten going!"

"Ohhh. Yeah, you have a point," Scar says. "Empty threats, or even completely full threats, are totally fine. So are fights. But we've barely gotten anywhere in this game yet, have we?"

Grian is now saying something incomprehensible about Mumbo and legs. Scar has no idea what they're talking about, but Mumbo seems deathly offended. Scar is briefly touched by the age of Mumbo and Grian's friendship. They clearly don't only have inside jokes by now, but inside insults. Only the absolute closest of friends can collect things like that.

"It really was a lame dare to end on," Scar says. "And a super lame dare to be fighting about. Those two are horribly irresponsible, really. Uh. Who's going to break them up?"

"Not it," Impulse and Pearl say simultaneously.

"Dangit! I should have said not it," Scar says. He turns to Grian and Mumbo, who have taken advantage of their full range of movement to -

- to -

Scar. Scar isn't sure what they're doing. This isn't just because Grian and Mumbo fights are incomprehensible. It's because they're - so, okay. Scar knows where they are. Scar knows, in general, the outline of their shapes, the way the vague impression of great, terrible, black wings must be Grian, and the way the thing seemingly coiled out of vines, or perhaps wires, must be Mumbo, except they also aren't there? It's like with them arguing like this, whatever perception filter they had on simply had decided to stop working, and had left them...

Well.

Scar thinks the horrors from beyond must get in a lot of fights, is all he's saying.

It's not that he doesn't know, intellectually, that they're all like that. It's more that this is the first time in a while that, instead of joking about it, or accidentally looking at it for themselves, Grian and Mumbo seem to have just. Well. Scar presumes they don't know, that they've given up pretending mortality. It's the sort of thing that both of them had been panicking about earlier. And Scar presumes they don't know, because it's terrifying, skirting on that edge where he has to actually think about the fact that they're all -

- that -

- what do you call an absence of space -

- the void had always felt like a thing that dissolved -

- focus. He shudders. Okay. Have Pearl and Impulse noticed? Probably? Impulse was... and Pearl had been the first to mostly... okay. Okay! He can do this. He just -

- he's -

- he's not a thing that's alive. Okay. Cool. Or, is it that the void is a thing that's alive, but he's only a piece of it? Or. No. Doesn't matter. How is he going to break them up? How? Grian and Mumbo, when they play-fight like this (and it is, for all of its current viciousness, still play-fighting), are the worst to try to get between, because neither of them have moderation. Scar knows! He got his beautiful custom tree blown up for his troubles, because Grian and Mumbo don't know moderation! And that had been silly early-game things, back when the season was bright and normal and they weren't all, you know, well.

"Scar," Impulse says, behind the distant roaring in Scar's ears. "Scar, are you - oh. Oh."

Luckily, Scar doesn't know moderation either.

BOYS, BOYS, YOU'RE BOTH BEAUTIFUL HORRIFIC ABOMINATIONS FROM THE DEPTHS OF HELL! THERE'S NO NEED TO FIGHT ABOUT IT, he says, and for the first time it registers that he does not hear his voice but he hears his voice but his voice is simply present. He supposes it makes sense. There is no air for their voices to travel in. But now, now it is obvious, because Scar does not move his lips, and does not shout, and yet his voice sticks to the forefront of the world, heard in perfect clarity, not heard, no clarity, just known.

Huh.

They turn not turn they are looking at him, Scar knows suddenly, and he would feel hunted, but suddenly he knows he is nothing-void-predator as well, and isn't that... interesting. For a moment - just one - Scar stops bothering with pretense and lets himself feel that, and...

He knows the others are afraid, perhaps. In that moment, Scar decides he is not. He is still afraid of many things. Of never going home. Of finding no one there. Of the fact this is all his fault. But of this? This is... something else.

He is being looked at. He is being perceived by emptiness. But Scar's used to being the center of attention, so he simply perceives them right back. He can feel the moment Grian realizes what's happening, and he can feel the dread in Mumbo, and, hm. That's not quite what he was going for. But it did break them up, and that was the goal.

WE'RE SO CLOSE TO ACTUALLY FINISHING A GAME OF TRUTH OR DARE. OR, WELL, NOT PARTICULARLY CLOSE, I GUESS, BUT WE'VE STARTED FOR ONCE! THIS IS A SILLY REASON TO GIVE UP ON IT.

"Scar," says Grian, and, huh. Okay, Scar's the only one who has the voice thing down. Well, now he just feels rude. "Scar, given - is now the time to be worried about -"

ABSOLUTELY, Scar says.

Mumbo laughs, a little high and hysterical, and its halfway to being the thing Scar has done with his voice. Scar shakes it off.

"Besides," Scar says, "I think you're scaring yourselves? And that wasn't even the dare! I mean, this isn't talking about Grian's wings, I guess, but -"

"Okay," says Grian, and he's managed to go back to pretending to be Grian again, or thinking of himself as Grian, or however that works. "Cool. That was weird. I hate that. It's your turn, Mumbo."

"Right," says Mumbo, who has gone back to being Mumbo shaped. Scar sits back, pleased with himself. "In that case. Scar."

"What!" Scar says. "After that!"

"Come on," Pearl says, "Impulse and I haven't gone yet!"

"Told you that I could go first," Impulse says cheerfully. "I give it even odds the game ends before I get to go, because everyone here knows I have no shame."

"I won't allow that," Pearl says.

"...was that a threat?" Impulse asks.

"Absolutely," Pearl says.

"...huh," Impulse says. "Neat."

"I'm still going for Scar," Mumbo says. "Truth or dare."

"I regret being the reason this game continued," Scar complains. "You all are playing to gang up on me!"

"Yeah. Gang up on me instead," Pearl says.

"I wonder about everyone's priorities," Grian says, and Scar agrees, even though he gets the sense they are talking about two very different kinds of priorities.

The game continues.

#answered #hermitcraft #a bee fic #the continued adventures of the boatem road trip #unreality #existential horror #although scar takes it... better... than most #so make of that whatever you will #anyway i went 'time to get back in a writing groove. i know. i will write a short and silly road trip drabble' #and instead it ended up being - checks app - 2529 words #SORRY ANON THAT THIS IS LIKE A NOVEL I GUESS #anyway this one is weird and is also me getting back in the saddle #also yeah we're lagging behind canon now. i DID warn you #and this isn't the whole game of truth or dare so we may get some aftermath later #sorry the dares are dumb. my only other options were perhaps not pg-13 #so i went 'you know discretion is the better part of valor maybe not'

[martuzzio]

The idea of Ren joining the Amputees-Only club sounds so bittersweet... cuz before he knew they were having fun, but also knew that they were allowed to have a bond like that. He never expected to join them.

I can honestly imagine in his first few meetings there's a few times where Ren just cries, poor guy...

Rendog's first Amputee's Only Club Meeting (written under the cut because this one is longer than normal)

Despite what the universe seems to think, Doc is a pretty easygoing guy. Yes, he does look scary as hell and yes, he was a mob boss at one point, but that doesn’t mean he’s a violent person. Well, he’s violent when he needs to be, but that doesn’t mean he enjoys it. In reality, his favorite moments are all from quiet parts of his normal, boring, daily life as a hermit.

In these everyday moments, Doc likes to process things. He likes to sit in the greenhouse and watch the bio bees work alongside the robot bees. He likes to brush his fingers on the plants and let his half-robotic brain process the data into something that resembles touch. He likes to listen to Grian and Etho chat as they work.

He observes small moments like these because that’s all he really does. He takes in data and processes it. He uses the processed information to judge his surroundings and react accordingly. Sometimes this means that he uses his data to laugh at his friends who make dumb jokes. But sometimes he uses the data to run, hide, or fight back. When all you do is process data to keep yourself alive, it becomes very hard to ignore incoming information.

This is how Doc eventually locates Ren. He wasn’t planning on finding where his longtime friend wheeled off to, much less go searching for him, but Doc unfortunately decided to take a more leisurely route to the bridge and his camera eye caught the slight movement anyway. Doc has to give it to him; the man knows how to hide. The werewolf is in a lesser-used community room, curled into a dusty couch that’s been shoved into the corner. The chrome wheels of his temporary mobility aid reflect off of the window overlooking deep space. Ren has his left leg drawn up to this chest. His stump of a right leg rests on the couch cushion, shunned. Ren’s obviously hid because he doesn’t want to be found, but unluckily for him, Doc was specifically altered to notice things.

Ren’s flinch when Doc claps his hand on his shoulder is almost unnoticeable. Ren looks like he’s either been crying or had a bad allergic reaction to the dust. Doc assumes the former.

“Cub was working on your new parts earlier today. They look pretty sick,” he ventures.

Ren looks like he has the entire universe on his shoulders. “That’s wonderful,” he mumbles. He opens his mouth as if to say more, but instead sighs and slides his eyes shut.

Doc plops down on the couch and slings his arm over the back of the rest. The action makes Ren recoil again, this time more visibly, and Doc pointedly ignores it. Instead, he says, “As much as I want you to come see what Cub is making, you will go to him when you feel like it. There is nothing you need to do right now besides heal.”

Ren barks out a wet laugh. “Bro, I appreciate you so much, but how can stumps heal?”

Doc’s cybernetic hand twitches in sympathy. “You know what I mean, man, and we both know it.” Doc replies. He looks down at the sliver of space between his leg and Ren’s and chews his words. Ren shifts his gaze to Doc’s arm, then to gaze directly at the creeper’s face.

Doc feels uncomfortable in a way he’s never felt before. All of the other amputee hermits were already amputees when they joined the crew. They had time to heal, be angry, and let go in their own ways. He did, too. But now, with Ren sitting next to him, suffering through the same kind of anguish Doc felt when he first woke up from being operated on, Doc suddenly doesn’t know how to act. How do you comfort someone who literally lost a third of their body? As much as Doc knows what that feels like and as much as he wants to help his friend, he might not be able to. He might not ever be able to.

It’s the single most heartbreaking thing that Doc’s realized in a long, long time.

This revelation causes the duo to sit in silence for a long while. Then, Doc gets an idea. His eye shifts to look at his friend. Ren narrows his eyes tiredly but waits anyway.

“The Amputees-Only Club meeting is in a few minutes.” Doc murmurs. Ren is silent, but he plows on. “I think you should come,” he pleads. “I think everyone would be very happy to see you.”

Ren’s throat clicks as he swallows. “I’m sure they would.”

“I would be very happy to see you.”

Ren’s eyelids squeeze together. “I know you would.”

“Then let’s go,” Doc insists as he pushes himself to his feet. He turns around and smiles as much as he can at his friend, still curled up on the couch. Ren gazes exhaustedly back. “I think it would be a good idea.” He wishes his smile weren’t so frightening.

Ren moves to rub his eyes with his hands but remembers he’s missing one of his arms a little too late. The resulting crumpled expression immediately burns into Doc’s deep storage memory. “I don’t know, Doc.” The werewolf manages after a long moment. “I appreciate you trying to help, but…”

Doc understands. Of course he does. When he first joined the hermits, the idea of a weekly club meeting exclusively for amputees sounded farfetched at best and belittling at worst. Hell, he didn’t even think there were enough amputees on the team to warrant a club. Imagine his surprise when three other people showed up to his first session, all excited he was there to hang out with them.

With this in mind, all he can do is repeat, “I think it would be a good idea.”

Ren stares up at him, and in that moment, he looks as old as Xisuma. But then he gently closes his eyes, inhales slowly and shallowly, and motions for Doc to drag his mobility aid closer. Doc complies immediately.

The journey to the meeting room, like every other journey on the Hermit Craft, is long. It’s made even longer because of Ren’s inexperience with his aid, but Doc doesn’t dare to offer his help. They eventually end up in front of the elevator that Doc remotely called beforehand with his brain chip. When the doors open, Doc lets Ren wheel in first.

Ren is silent in the elevator. Doc tries to catch his expression, but his friend’s unruly hair blocks his vision. “We’re playing cards tonight.” He mentions.

“That’s what you do at every Amputee-Only Club meeting.”

Doc shifts his eye back to the elevator door. “…Correct.”

Ren doesn’t reply.

When the duo finally reaches the Club meeting room, Doc pauses outside for a moment instead of directing his brain to open the door like normal. He glances down at Ren again and murmurs, “if you don’t want to go back, or to your room or something, that’s—”

“It’s fine,” Ren interrupts. He sounds defeated. “We walked all the way here, so we may as well go.”

Doc activates the door without another thought.

The door slides open and reveals the club room. It’s small, smaller than the average community space on the Hermit Craft, but it feels warm. The soft yellow color painted on the walls matches pleasantly with the yellow of the couch cushions. Joe definitely was the one to orchestrate that. There’s a small kitchenette in the corner that’s set up to have nice views of outer space. Various game tables fill the rest of the room, a few surrounded by five chairs. Doc wonders if Ren will notice the new chair addition. Maybe he already had.

The most interesting part of the space, though, is the people within it. TFC is bundled up on the couch, snoring pleasantly and covered in at least ten blankets. His usual plate of cookies is already half eaten. Iskall is standing at the kitchen counter, fiddling with a teacup filled with a mysterious bright pink liquid. His outfit has a few suspicious-looking singe marks at the hem. Finally, Scar is sat at the poker table in the middle of the room, crossed legs resting on an adjacent chair. He’s sorting through a pile of yellow and orange chips. To Doc’s continued wonder, the stack of bright blue cards resting near Scar’s elbow have miraculously not been knocked onto the floor yet.

When the doors open, Scar and Iskall look over. Ren immediately shifts at Doc’s elbow. Doc waits a moment to let Ren speak if he wants to, but when his shorter friend remains silent, he clears his throat in a grinding noise and announces, unnecessarily, “We’re here.”

Scar is so excited that his eyes have turned into little slivers of green. “Ren, I’m so happy you decided to tag along!” He kicks one of the chairs out from the table and clonks his foot on it for emphasis. The blue cards wobble on the edge of the table but still refuse to fall. “Sit down! Iskall can get you something to drink. Have you ever played poker?” He leans forward with the question. “It’s difficult, but I think it’s fun!”

“Uh, I haven’t.” Ren replies awkwardly, still at the door alongside Doc. “I’ve never even heard of it before.”

“Yeah, I would be surprised if you knew about it. It’s one of those old-timey games from TFC’s era.” Iskall says from across the room. He is now by the couch and is gently patting TFC’s fluffy hair to wake him. “Don’t worry that you don’t know. We’ll teach you.”

Ren tries and fails to make a pointed noise of interest, but he still seems intrigued. Doc feels the knot in his chest loosen a little. He rolls his shoulders to relieve some tension and moves to sit down. By the time he turns his head to look back, Ren is already wheeling forward to join him but looks lost as to where he should sit.

“Howdy, Ren. Sit next to me so I can teach you, but I’ll only teach if you’re willing to listen.” TFC, now awake, grumbles good-naturedly as he heaves himself off the couch. With his large frame still wrapped in a dozen blankets, he looks like a huge bear compared to Iskall. Which is impressive, Doc thinks, since Iskall is nowhere near frail. TFC’s metal prosthetic clonks on the floor as he walks over to the poker table. As he sits down across from Scar, he says, “There’s no point in just sitting there and gawking at us. Grab a seat.” He uses his leg to nudge the chair to his left.

Ren blinks and maneuvers his aid to let him sit down next to the astronaut. TFC procures a blanket from his pile and offers one to him. Ren, after slowly settling in his chair, accepts the pink fuzzy blanket. Doc accepts a purple one.

TFC lances over to Ren as he saves the blue cards from the edge of the table. “Poker’s good fun. You’ll get it in no time.” He snorts and flicks his gaze to Scar, who is busy stacking the chips into a pyramid. “This one always makes sure we have a great, long game.”

Scar looks up and winces minutely in a false apology. “Sorry about that.”

TFC chuckles. “Boy, I’ve never had better games than when I play with you.”

Scar’s grin almost sparkles. TFC and Doc grin back and Iskall hides his laugh in his shoulder.

“Anyway, ready for your first game with us amputees?” TFC brings the conversation back to Ren, who suddenly looks a lot more uncomfortable.

“I,” he begins, his eyes flicking to TFC, then Doc, before looking down. “I, well, uh…”

The table is silent. Iskall is staring at the table with his hands in his lap. TFC sighs and begins shuffling the cards. Doc, as much as he wants to clear the air somehow, can’t seem to find a way to do so. Scar just looks sad. He looks right at Ren, almost through him.

Ren stares back, eyes wide.

“You don’t want to be here.” Scar says quietly, finally. It’s not a question. Ren’s choked response makes the ex-convex smile slightly. “You can say so, Ren. You’re not going to hurt our feelings. None of us want to be here. But, as much as we may want to, we can’t change what happened to us.” He falls silent again as he looks at a particularly twisted scar on the back of his left hand. He rubs at it harshly with the pad of his thumb before Iskall stops him. “This might be selfish,” Scar continues, softly, “but I’m happy that I at least don’t have to sit in here alone.”

For a long moment, the table is silent. Then, with a rush of noise, Ren makes a sound like he’s dying. In a certain way, Doc thinks, he is.

“I don’t want to be here,” Ren confesses as his open mouth contorts and tears roll down his face. “I don’t want to be here.”

All Doc can do is wrap his arms around everyone else, encasing Ren and his other amputee friends in his embrace, and wish he could do more.

#hermitcraft #space outlaws stories #rendog #docm77 #tinfoilchef #goodtimeswithscar #iskall85

[lnterjection]

About the whole Hermit Tommy AUs

So as someone who watches both DSMP and Hermitcraft I’ve been seeing a lot of the whole Hermit Tommy concept where Tommy ends up on Hermitcraft in one way or another and gets Therapy TM or whatever. What’s really funny to me is that realistically, while the Hermits would try to not be jerks, especially around him, I highly doubt they would go all mother bear or whatever like a lot of people assume. 

Y’all forget that the Hermits kinda (jokingly, of course) act like jerks sometimes too, just in a different way than people on the DSMP. Just because you’re not allowed to grief, steal, or kill without permission doesn’t mean there aren’t other ways to be a bad person, and I’d argue the Hermits get really creative with it. Like if you consider the lore implications of a lot of those Turf War bets some of them are really unsettling. For example, the whole Bdubs being Etho’s employee and the power imbalance it creates, combined with the way Etho seems to gleefully take advantage of that with what could be argued is very demeaning and threatening behavior is like, bad. And considering how abusers are often victims themselves in the past, and how it echoes Beef’s previous treatment of Etho, it doesn’t bode very well. And let’s not forget the time Scar and Grian literally did HUMAN ORGAN TRAFFICKING for Cleo’s Head Hunt. Not even just that, they literally bred up a whole society of people just to kill them all for a single organ like they’re cattle or something. Like lore wise these are not good people. 

So like they all care about each other, but the really, really closed off attitude they have towards outsiders (again, just going by roleplay and lore, we can assume story Hermitcraft follows the same rules as actual Hermitcraft) means that I don’t think Tommy would last very long on the server, especially with his stealing and griefing tendencies, unless he learns to adapt super quickly. For example, Hermitcraft has a “no children” policy, I believe (adapted sometime after Mumbo joined, of course), and in order to be whitelisted you have to have the approval of every active member. No exceptions. So if Tommy shows up out of nowhere, even if he begs to not be sent back off to DSMP. to avoid any trouble from both Tommy and Dream the Hermits would most likely ship him off to some other world and say something like “not our problem, please keep us out of your drama, we very much would like to continue living our Hermit existences in peace.”

Sooooo cue Tommy getting passed around various SMPs like a hot potato because no one wants to be the cruel server to send him back to Dream, but none of them want to deal with Dream either because let’s be real here, why would you fuck with Dream for the sake of some teenager who steals all your stuff, most people are not that nice, so Dream goes on this wild goose chase through various servers to try and find Tommy while Tommy keeps trying to get him off his trail by convincing members of various servers to let him in and hide for a bit. He goes from HC to Vault Hunters to X-life to Legacy to Truly Bedrock and gradually learns about relationships and worlds and just things outside DSMP in the process. Which honestly has the potential for a really good character arc. 

#where was I going with this again #hermit!tommy au #hermit tommy au #tommyinnit #hermitcraft #dream smp #hc x dsmp

[theres-an-impulstor-among-us]

3rd life Villain!Impulse perhaps? Reasoning because he's been so nice to all factions and appears very harmless...until he kills Tango in the firing squad scenario. Do with that as you will :3

honestly i think the villain 3rd Life AUs are some of my best writing. also i’m pretty sure i’m gonna end up writing everyone as a villain at some point lol (villains so far: Scar, Etho, Tango, Grian, Ren, Martyn, now Impulse. Joel too if you count that fic where he kills Jimmy)

…

A feeling of dread hangs over Impulse as he makes his way up to Tango’s base. Getting a private message from his best friend, simply saying “we need to talk”, has highly unsettled him. He has absolutely no idea what Tango could want to talk to him about.”

As he gets to the hill Tango calls home, he spots Tango himself standing at the top, arms folded, clearly watching him. A shiver running down his spine, Impulse slowly climbs up the hill. Tango watches him all the way.

Finally, he gets to the top. Keeping an eye on the sun, which must be about an hour away from setting, he gives his friend a wave. “Hi, Tango. What’s… What’s going on?”

Tango’s looking at him with a narrow-eyed expression of distrust. “I know your game, Impulse.”

“Huh?” Impulse blinks. That’s not what he was expecting. “What?”

“Your little game of pretending to be allies with everyone so nobody will ever turn against you. Etho, Dogwarts, the crastle folk. You’ve got them all wrapped round your little finger.”

Impulse frowns. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Tango rolls his eyes. “Uh huh, ‘course you don’t. You change the sheet music for everyone, don’t you? Everyone believes they’re the only one getting your support. Well, not me. I know what you’re up to and I’m gonna make sure you stop getting away with it, starting today.”

As Tango turns to start walking away, Impulse grabs his wrist, stopping him from leaving. “Please don’t, Tango,” he says calmly.

Tango scoffs. “Let go of me, Impulse. I’m gonna expose you whether you like it or not.”

Impulse hangs on to Tango’s wrist. “I’m giving you one last chance to back down. You’re red; if something happens to you, you won’t come back.”

“You’re not gonna stop me,” Tango retorts. “I know you. Your niceness has always been your biggest weakness, and in this case, it’s gonna be your downfall.”

“You’ve misjudged me.”

Impulse abruptly seizes Tango’s lapels and roughly swings him closer to the edge of the cliff, holding him dangerously close to the precipice. “I‘ll do anything to survive,” Impulse says coldly. “Anything.”

Tango’s eyes widen with shock. “Impulse-!”

But Impulse shoves him off the top of the cliff.

He waits for a few seconds, listening to Tango’s screams get quieter and quieter, until they’re abruptly cut off.

Tango fell from a high place

Taking a deep breath, Impulse takes off running. He doesn’t know if there’s anyone nearby but he can’t risk it. If anyone sees him here, he’s done for. Absolutely done for.

The chat is filling up with confused and concerned messages but it doesn’t matter now. Tango is gone forever. Nobody ever needs to know what happened.

Impulse dashes back towards the wool castle but as he passes Tango’s still-gushing lava minigame, he bumps into Etho, who’s running the other way.

“Impulse!” Etho breathes. “Gosh, you scared me. What happened?”

Despite internally panicking quite hard, Impulse manages to stammer, “I-I dunno, I was just going to Tango’s base to talk to him when I saw the message. I thought he might have been somewhere around here but I couldn’t find any dropped items or anything. He must’ve been somewhere else when he died.”

“Tango doesn’t just fall from a high place like that,” Etho says. “He’s careful. Impulse, I’m worried that someone might have murdered him.”

“What?!” Impulse gasps. “Who would do that?!”

“I don’t know for sure, but my prime suspect is the crastle alliance. Bdubs had it out for Tango for some reason so I’m sure he knows something.”

“Oh no…” Impulse stares at his friend with wide, innocent eyes. “Bdubs wouldn’t have taken TWO of Tango’s lives… would he?”

Etho slowly shakes his head. “I don’t know. I thought I knew our friends really well but lately, I…” He sighs quietly. “Let’s just say I wouldn’t put it past him. But it’s getting late; I’ll go talk to him tomorrow.”

He turns back towards the castle. “You coming?”

“I‘ll be there later. I’m just gonna go check on my villagers.”

“Gotcha. And Impulse…”

Impulse pauses as Etho glances back at him. “Thanks for being the only person on this server I can really trust.”

Impulse smiles back. “No problem.”

…

Under the cover of darkness, Impulse makes his way to the crastle. He can see Cleo up on the roof, aiming a crossbow at him, but thankfully, she lowers it when he gets close enough for her to see who he is.

Cleo and Bdubs let Impulse into the crastle. “What’s going on, Impulse?” Bdubs demands. “Nobody seems to know what happened to Tango!”

“Nobody’s owning up to knowing, anyway,” Cleo adds. “I don’t suppose you do?”

Impulse shakes his head. “I’ve no idea. But I’ve heard rumours going round the server and I thought I should come to you directly to let you know.”

“Let us know what?” Bdubs says.

“That Etho suspects you guys had something to do with Tango’s death.”

“What?!”

Bdubs and Cleo exchange a shocked look.

“Why would he think that?!” Bdubs snaps. “He has no evidence!”

“That’s why I thought I should come over and warn you,” says Impulse. “He’s gonna come over here tomorrow to confront you about it.”

“Oh gawsh…” Bdubs groans. “Thanks for telling us.”

“Oh, but this is just to give you some warning to prepare. You can’t let Etho know I told you, okay? Otherwise he might not tell me other stuff that concerns you guys.”

“Don’t worry, we won’t,” Cleo says. “If we’re your secret girlfriend, does that mean Etho’s your… uh… spouse?”

“I don’t really have a singular “spouse”,” responds Impulse, making air quotes over the word “spouse”. “More like the rest of the server is my “spouse” and I can’t let them know that I favour you over them.”

“Riiiight, gotcha. Guess you’d better head home before your “spouse” misses you.”

Impulse nods. “Yeah, I gotta go back to Etho. See you guys later.”

As he leaves the crastle and starts to head for home, he spots a figure watching him from next to one of Bdubs’s tall spruce trees. When the figure comes forward, Impulse recognises the person as Joel.

“Hi,” he says, giving a friendly smile. Joel isn’t one of his official allies at the moment but that doesn’t mean he can’t be nice to him. “What’s up?”

“I heard Tango died,” Joel says, eyes sparking with interest. “Do you know what happened?”

“No, I don’t. I just saw it in chat.”

“I think you’re lying.”

Impulse blinks. “What?”

Joel grins as he senses he’s caught Impulse off guard. “I said I think you’re lying. I think you’re manipulating everyone into believing you’re their friend when in actuality, you don’t care about any of them. And I think you killed Tango when he confronted you about it. Am I wrong?”

Impulse stares at him, unable to say anything in his defence.

In the ensuing pause, Joel takes a sudden step towards Impulse, who backs up a few steps, his hand automatically flying to the hilt of his sword. But he pauses. He has to be extremely careful here; Bdubs and Cleo may be watching him. If they see him put a single foot wrong here, it’s over. He has to let Joel make the first move.

“Would you kill me?” says Joel challengingly. “Would you kill me as callously as you killed Tango?”

Impulse carefully turns his back to the crastle and narrows his eyes. “Come and find out. Or would you rather die stupidly and pointlessly because you forgot about FIRE DAMAGE?”

That does it. Impulse knew exactly how to rile Joel up and it works. Eyes flashing red, Joel growls and lashes out with his fist.

Impulse allows himself to be hit in the chin, narrowly avoiding biting his tongue. Joel’s second blow, this time to the stomach, winds him and causes him to drop to his knees, vulnerable. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Joel drawing his sword. This is it; this is the moment. Either his position on the server will elevate… or he will simply die.

He holds his breath and squeezes his eyes shut.

“GET AWAY FROM HIM!”

An arrow flies out of nowhere and buries itself in Joel’s chest, causing him to stagger back a step. A split second later, a second arrow hits Joel in the neck, and that’s all it takes.

SmallishBeans was shot by BdoubleO100

Impulse stares at the ground where Joel had landed, a second before he died. He can’t believe his plan worked so well.

“Impulse, are you okay?” Bdubs appears at Impulse’s side, discarding his crossbow. “What happened?”

“He… He was gonna kill me,” Impulse chokes out. This isn’t entirely an act; Joel’s unexpected hit to his stomach has completely snatched the wind from his sails.

“Why? Why did he wanna kill you?”

“Did he really need a reason?” Cleo says. “He was red and Impulse is green. Nuff said.”

“Wh-Whatever it was, you guys saved my life.” Impulse gives them a smile. “Thanks. If Etho or anyone else asks what happened, you guys spotted me getting attacked by Joel on my way back from checking on my villagers. Okay?”

“Ooh, good story,” Bdubs says approvingly. “But are you sure you’re okay? You’re not hurt, are you?”

“No, no, I’m fine. Thanks to you guys. I should probably head home, though.”

Bdubs pats him on the shoulder. “Yeah, go get some rest. Thanks again for… um… coming past and not visiting.”

Impulse nods, knowing exactly what Bdubs means. “No worries.”

…

“Joel just attacked you?” Etho frowns. “Why would he do that?”

“He doesn’t need a reason,” responds Impulse, recalling what Cleo said earlier. “He was red. I guess he just saw an easy target and couldn’t resist.”

“So he attacked you on your way back from the villagers, huh. And you’re okay, right? You’re not hurt.”

“No, I’m fine,” says Impulse. “A little shaken and tired from everything that’s happened, though.”

“Oh yeah, you should get some sleep.” Etho smiles at his friend. “See you tomorrow.”

“Night, Etho.”

As Impulse gets into bed in his room, he can’t help a small smile. He took a big risk today but it has really paid off. Getting rid of two red lifers in one day is enough of an accomplishment in of itself, but doing it without arousing suspicion on himself AND managing to turn Etho and Bdubs further against each other? That’s something he can be proud of.

All he needs to do now is make sure he’s in the right place at the right time for Etho’s confrontation with Bdubs tomorrow and perhaps he can be there for another red life death. Bdubs may be one of his strongest allies but if Impulse sees a chance to get another player out of the game, well…

He’s going to take it.

#3rd life smp #3rdlifesmp #impulsesv #etho #ethoslab #bdubs #bdoubleo100 #zombiecleo #smallishbeans #tangotek #vaunna’s requests

[hermitcraftheadcanons]

Hermitopia AU Conclusion

The last ask has been answered, the masterposts are complete, and (although art, writing, and Discord discussion are still accepted and encouraged) it is finally time to officially wrap up the Hermitopia AU! Because this was such a massive event - and no small thing to moderate - there will be a pause in blog activity for a day or so before the inbox will open for regular headcanons again. I apologize in advance for the wait!

In the mean time, I would just like to say: I am so, so thankful to everyone who participated in the AU. Your ideas and your creativity have made this blog a better place, whether you sent in one headcanon or dozens, and I am constantly in awe of the energy and enthusiasm of this community. Thank you, all of you, for making this universe we’ve created as vast and as interesting as it turned out to be.

Below are a collection of my own ideas, for those of you who like a satisfying (but still not entirely closed-ended) ending. These events take place as many days, months, or years into the future as you need them to make your own ideas work, and none of them are set in stone. You can take all of them, some of them, or none of them as truth if you want to...but either way, it has been an honour to build on a project like this one alongside you all.

And with that...the Hermitopia AU concludes! Finished, or barely begun, like so many good projects are. Have a great day everyone, and happy headcanoning!

- Mod Shade

"People of Hermitopia."

The man on the screen shifts, running a nervous hand across his bald head and squaring his shoulders. The broadcast quality is unstable, but it's more than enough for every citizen in the city to recognize who's speaking.

"This is your Concorp Branch Director, Cub. As I'm sure you are aware, I am the head of Project VEX in this city. You all know the VEX initiative as groundbreaking, life-saving, a shining success and a step towards a new era for humanity...and some of you may even see me as a hero for creating it.”

He closes his eyes, a brief look of pained remorse crossing his face. For a moment, he looks utterly defeated, almost small in the face of his impromptu audience of thousands...but finally, he fixes the camera with a steady gaze once more and begins the great unravelling.

“Maybe it was all those things, in the beginning. Maybe *I* was, once. But today, after far too long, I have some confessions to make...."

~

- For years, Cub had been desperately scrambling to hold the tatters of his life’s work together. Project VEX had started so well, and he had poured so much of himself into it, that when the failed experiments and rebellions became more and more frequent he was unable to accept a change of course. He covered up the project’s failings to maintain funding and public image, but mostly to maintain his own image to himself - that he was still the hero he’d set out to be and create at the project’s start. However, his denial was wearing on him heavily, and eventually he had a breakdown and decided to go public rather than keep drowning the city in lies.

- This breakdown was prompted by xB, who after his own moral breakthrough, confronted Cub and urged him to stop withholding knowledge and truth. xB also informed Cub of his own unknown truth - that the unintended power of his presence was the thing that was keeping the experiments successful when Cub was around. This was the final straw in breaking through Cub’s denial

- Along with Cub’s broadcasted speech, files were released to the media containing proof against most if not all of Concorp’s falsehoods. Many names were cleared of crimes that had been pinned on them, including Beef, Impulse, Doc, Cleo, and the majority of the other Unrestrained and Unaffiliated former VEX trainees that the company had tried to cast away

- Understandably, it took a very long time for the chaos to die down and all that information to be processed by society and the justice system. It may be years before the community can see some of their heroes in the proper light again, but at least they are now free to begin rebuilding their reputation without being labeled as villains and traitors.

- Those who actually did commit villainous acts are given a fair trial, with consideration for their motives and the new Concorp information as extra evidence

- The VEX program is withdrawn by Cub’s superiors and put under a strict review. It is reborn after a massive restructuring, with a new director, new limitations on what experiments can and cannot be attempted, and a greatly extended screening and training program to reduce the chances of graduates becoming villains. The new project will produce far fewer heroes with much subtler powers at first...but if that is the cost for the safety and stability of the city, then most people would agree that it is a small price to pay.

- Cub is not permitted to work on the new Project VEX in a management role, ever again. It’s a harsh blow for him, to have to watch his dream from the sidelines...but he knows he gave up the right to guide it when he abused the control that it gave him. At least his superiors allowed him something to do while he awaits trial: he is present (although guarded) at every new VEX trainee’s first experiment, lending his power to increase their chances of success.

- Mayor Scar resigned willingly. Nobody had enough evidence to accuse him of anything, and he didn’t plan on giving them a reason to look by trying to stay in office. Instead he chose to make his exit from both Concorp and government matters complete, at last. Or so he thinks. Who knows? Maybe he’ll learn what most of the people he’s helped to manipulate have already found out: that connections and old grudges don’t easily lose their grip.

- Scar is replaced by TFC, voted in by almost unanimous community support and funded by donations from all the people he’s saved over the years

- The greater Convex company offers a choice to the survivors of the old program: Come to work under their new, more honorable system, or take a generously large settlement and be free to build new lives

- Team ZIT declines the job offer, pooling their payment and using it to buy a shiny new base together for their independent hero venture. There are still a handful of real villains to fight, after all, and there are bound to be more once people start successfully copying Concorp technology. Now that Impulse is back at their side, they wouldn’t give up their roles saving the community for anything - but they’re done with being used by some guy behind a desk. From now on, justice and bravery will be their only guides!

- ...justice, bravery, and TFC, that is. He isn’t their boss by any means, but the more experienced hero does drop by often between his mayoral duties to make sure the youngsters stay out of trouble and in one piece.

- The nHo, according to all official records, took their settlements and split up, leaving Hermitopia far behind. However, Team ZIT suspects that the vigilante life hasn’t left them so easily. They’d be the last ones to report the odd sighting of a whipping vine or a distant masked figure, though - unregulated as they are, the nHo’s shady methods for a good cause prove useful from time to time. (And their base has really good tea. Okay, maybe it’s a little bit more than “the occasional sighting”...)

- Ren settles back into his meadow cabin, but after that massive release of info and a long, LONG period of processing, he now has Iskall, Stress, and Cleo as regular visitors. Every morning he wakes up and forgets for a moment that it’s real, that they’re really alive and with him again...but they are, and he is happier than he ever thought he would be again.

- Jevin and Mumbo visit the cabin occasionally. It took a while for Mumbo to get his memory back, but he now remembers all of his friendship with Iskall and Grian, and they come together for fun and shenanigans regularly with the rest of the cabin crew.

- Grian still spends his time looking for his clones, but honestly, he doesn’t mind. The adventure always did hold more meaning than the conclusion for him, and now, he has friends to help out!

- False disappears into thin air to wait out the fallout of Concorp’s information release. She snags herself a quiet job and a small apartment on the outskirts of town, fully intending to return to her mercenary work just as soon as the dust has settled...next week, maybe. Or the week after that. Or maybe, once the garden has been fully planted. She’s really enjoying having time for stuff like that now...but she’ll get back to work, really, she will! Soon.

- Joe and Cleo tearfully reunite through xB, and Joe becomes another frequent visitor to the cabin. Cleo also visits Joe’s base in the time exclusion zone, but she really prefers the cabin. Time skips are disorienting, and they make her want to sneeze.

- Keralis and Void come to an agreement. Xisuma isn’t entirely clear on what that agreement is - something to do with an allowance of cookies from Biffa’s bakery in exchange for not killing anyone - but he’s more than happy to be less sore and tired all the time.

Hermitopia is making progress. Real progress, this time - not just the breaking of humanity’s limitations, but breaking them with true heroic care, with the good of everyone in mind. There are some hurts that will never fully heal, mistakes that can be learned from but not undone, and yet...now there is a path, a way forward. It won’t be easy, but a kind and gentle future waits for them, welcome and well deserved. They will figure it out, together.

And together, they will step forward, into the new world that each of them has helped to create.

#hermitopia au #announcement #sort of #I know this is long; and not all of it is my best work; but I hope you'll find some of it worthy of canon #or at least inspiring to your own personal version of events #both hermitopia masterposts will be added to the masterpost of AUs in the normal pinned post #you'll still be able to access them #most importantly; I hope this event was fun for all of you #that's all there is to it; really. that's the point. :) #again; thank you