#but i don't know how

[batbusiness-schooldropout]

Jason: I'm back from the dead and I've come to beat your ass!

Tim: You leave me no choice. I'll have to use my ultimate weapon

Jason: Fat lot of good that'll do you! I can't wait to hear your bones break

Tim: 🥺please don't break my bones Jason! 🥺 I just wanted to be helpful 🥺 I just wanted a family in the same country as me🥺

Jason: I know what you're doing

Tim: 🥺Is it working 🥺

Jason: .......yes you sick son of a bitch

#i tried to type in uwu #but i don't know how #batfam #just siblings being siblings #tim drake #jason todd #red robin #red hood

[teaboot]

I want to find a way to explain what I remember learning language was like, but the hard part is that before words the way I remember thinking didn't *use* words, but what is the name of a thing which clearly and concisely communicates a specific concept from one mind to another through visual media? Fucking words. So fuck me I guess

Anyhow "Tomorrow" as a word was a fucking mind bender with very memorable confusion so I'm starting there

#I love the concept of communicating incommunicable things #Like synesthesia #And mental states #And the sense of self #And I wanna PAINT EVERYTHING #But I don't know how

[sophsicle]

you know what i think needs to be, like, a thing? telling the people around you how to take care of you. i know. i know. revolutionary thought here. but it's just. i want ppl to tell me like "hey. these are the words that make me feel good when people say them" or "these are the things that make me feel good when people do them" or "when i'm feeling shitty i want space. or i want touch. or i want a bottle of wine. or i want to cry about it. or i want to laugh about it." i just feel like we live in this world that demands that we magically know the answers to these things. and if we don't it's because we don't really care. but i don't think that's true. i only know as much of you as you're willing to tell me. so tell me how to love you so i can do it properly.

#this might be an anxiety thing #but like i will just sit there and be like #i want to help #i want to reach out #but i don't know HOW #and i just need you to tell me like #tell me what you need #so that i can be helpful #soph rambles

[bomberqueen17]

disturbing

I was writing a post and at the end I was adding tags, as I do, and I typed the singular first person pronoun, I, and a list of tags popped up as suggestions that took me the fuck out. It was so disturbing I took a screenshot.

[image ID: a list of suggested tags, screenshotted. It's titled "popular" and the list is "I want to [star emoji]ve" "i wanna lose weight" "i sell content" "i love him"]

I wanna star-emoji-ve???? Well there's some pro-ana shit for you.

I don't know if the kids these days remember this but back in Livejournal around the era of strikethrough (the '07-'09 time period is where I remember noticing it) there was a movement to censor pro-self-harm blogs, that were support groups mostly supporting one another in more and more extreme anorexic/self-destructive/eating-disordered behaviors.

This is absolutely that. And they were like "it's self-expression" and everyone else in the world was like "it is actually a toxic encouragement of self-harm" because they were like, concretely instructing one another and recruiting vulnerable people to join them in ways to literally starve to death, they were support groups for killing yourself more or less, and so those tags would occasionally get banned or delisted or removed from search or whatever, but remember this was very early in the history of such things, and there was no algorithm. But people did use the browsing of blogs' "interests" to find one another, it was a feature of how Livejournal worked, and there wasn't a lot of moderation but the deactivation or delisting of those self-harm-encouraging tags were a hotly-contested bit of debate.

And so they got more creative, and found other ways to find one another, and people starved to death or otherwise irreparably damaged their bodies and their mental health and so on. I cannot emphasize enough, this was not fiction. These were not fictional stories depicting fictional scenarios that weren't happening, these were real people posting stories and encouragement and photographs of their real selves, showing off how much damage to themselves they were doing, concretely encouraging one another to do the same. This was not fiction.

But they kept finding new ways to talk about it so it couldn't be censored.

And then LJ deleted blogs for posting about fiction instead, and we all kind of forgot about it and moved on.

Highly displeased to find that it's all alive and well on Tumblr, to the point that it's the number one suggestion when I type the fucking first-person pronoun into the tag field, and I can't opt out of seeing that. COOL.

#someone told me to report this to tumblr #but i don't know how #so i'm posting about it instead #it's not like a blog i can link to #it's their fucking automated suggestions i can't opt out of #if i type it now it doesn't come up #because i have no idea what criteria they use for this #it's clearly contextual in some way #what are they analyzing idk #what about my blog led their shitty algo to decide i'm into that #idk but it's upsetting as fuck #and here we are worrying about fictional depictions of shit omg

[maranull]

i would be so insufferable if i ever got the patience to learn how to draw

#personal #so many characters i want to draw #but i don't know how #nor do i really have the time and patience to learn #but if i did! #i'd be nice (for me) #mmhm

[wheredidalltheusersgo]

Guys is it bad that I'm kinda starting to hate the only fanfic I've ever written?

I'm sorry, Gator Geoff. It's not you, it's me.

#The Stranded and the Scaly #total drama #td fanfic #I need to start loving that fic again #but I don't know how

[odxball]

i made an internsona💥 idk why but i'm kinda nervous posting this help

template by @emo-hermit

when i find the patient template i totally wanna show off my rhythm doctor oc hehe :D

personality + other random ramblings below the cut

their ecg halo thing changes when startled/shocked (it goes from ---^v--- to ---^v^v^v--- idk if that's a good representation)

actually works two jobs: one at msh and another at middlesea market (aka a grocery store that i just made up to reflect my irl job at a grocery store)

hates edega's guts. still secretly cries when he scolds her

always carries at least one stress ball in his pocket or bag, regardless of how stressed he actually is

frequently offers to make snacks to bring for ada and ian

chill and relaxed when defibrillating patients, a nervous wreck when doing literally anything else

wanders around msh aimlessly when not tasked with anything

#rhythm doctor #intern sona #i wanna interact with the rhythm doctor community more #but i don't know how #and i'm too scared #aaaaaagh everyone's so cool i wanna talk to them

[wanderingmind867]

I'm a super insecure person. It's why I always repost and reblog my posts. My brain can't seem to just let me be whenever my posts get no attention. If my posts don't get at least a little bit of attention, I feel the urge to repost them and reblog them. I don't know if I was always like this (I think the longer I use social media the worse my insecurity might get, but I can't prove that).

#insecure #insecurity #neurotic #autism #asd #Also I should probably tell my dad about this account one day #But I don't know how #It's like with the aegosexual thing #how do you bring that up to someone!? #But that's a topic for another post #neurodivergent #autistic #adhd #actually autistic #audhd #insecurities

[rubenesque-as-fuck]

Haven't heard from D in almost two months. Going around the apartment and putting all the stuff that reminds me of him into a box to hide away.

#dating nonsense #mostly just stuff like custom dice and diorama that he made for me #just hurts to look at #it's been almost two years since I saw him in person it's time to fucking let it go #need to snap myself the fuck out of it #but i don't know how #so I'm trying i guess #now severely regretting an october romance because it really ruins the vibe for the best month if it goes sideways later #anyway haha I'm deathly afraid I'm gonna be alone forever and ever it's so cool and fun #desperately wanna be touched but at the same time incredibly picky about who I can let into my immediate personal space at this point #these are not helpful traits to have #life of faye #stoned sad ramblings

[daisychainsandbowties]

bea is sleeping at last - eight

get rec'd gayboy 😔😔  i don't know what i expected

"i was just a kid who grew up strong enough/ to pick this armour up/ and suddenly it fit/ God"

newbea watching the one-two punch of Mary & Shannon. burning up at the sight of it, like an object slipping into a decaying orbit towards some immense object. towards love.

knowing that it would be hers, someday. this weight that Mary carries. Beatrice knows it like she knows the reach of her left hook; the anticipation of a blow. the inevitability of loss.

God. fitting. ill-fitting.

"i want to break these bones 'til they're better/ i want to break them right and feel alive/ you were wrong, you were wrong, you were wrong/ my healing needed more than time"

yeah, maybe she needed to fall off that motorbike. maybe she needed to break to come back together properly, wrapped in the love (hoodie) of those who love her.

"show me how to lay my sword down/ for long enough to let you through/ here i am, pry me open"

"here's a map, here's a shovel/ here's my achilles' heel/ i'm all in, palms out/ i'm at your mercy now and i'm ready to begin."

ava. a girl, a church. a girl, a roof overhead; a house you can't be thrown from. a house that won't collapse in on itself.

a girl like a star. a thing that burns and burns and dies, sudden, explosive. the aftermath of its death

and bea, standing as an occlusion in that bright cloud. alone again. 😔

#when i open my mouth/ i wanna tell you #but i don't know how #STOP em as if Atlas 1 & 2 aren't EMblazoned on my brain #saturn is one i have on my avatrice playlist. plus neptune #casper song recs #pvp with em #but it's just me getting my ass kicked

[swampndn]

Well. I'm overwhelmed. It's day 1 of the semester, and I haven't even gone to my first class yet. So. This is promising.

#I KNOW I NEED TO REST AND SHIT #but I don't know how #grad school is awful #All I know how to do is cry about it and play Animal Crossing

[wandering-einheri]

The more I work the more I feel like I'm about to hit my breaking point

#maybe if i just have more caffeine that'll fix me right? #maybe if i go for a hike i'll feel better #maybe if i go to the shooting range i'll feel better #maybe if I go to the gym that'll make my brain quiet #but at the end of the day I still come home to a dark cold house #and sleep alone #I want to love #to have a wife and maybe a family one day #but I don't know how

[mkstrigidae]

The Immortals

By Honorificabilitudinitatibus

Chapter 1: The Hunted

Unwillingly thrust into a realm full of beauty and danger, filled with beings who aren't supposed to exist, Sansa is exhausted, terrified, and desperate to return home. But with the secret of her heritage- heritage she hadn't even known about- revealed, these immortals aren't about to let her leave. Not when she holds something they want. Something valuable. Something in her very blood.

-

“Can’t we get the police involved?” Bran pleaded. “Get someone else to help find her?”

“I wish we could.” She told him, reaching out to squeeze his brother’s hand.

“Well why the hell can’t we?” Rickon snarled, his fists clenched so tight around his mug that Robb was amazed the cheap ceramic hadn’t shattered yet.

“Because, right now, Sansa isn’t in this world.” Brienne wearily admitted.

#my writing #new fic #kind of? #i wrote it a while ago #but now i'm finally comfortable enough to just fully post the bizarre fic nonsense my stressed brain came up with in december of 2020 #got fic #asoiaf fic #asoiaf fanfiction #got fanfiction #jonsa fanfiction #warning: there is a LOT of blood involved #i need to learn how to make actual fan edits so i can make lil title cards for my stories #but i don't know how #or where to source pics from that are allowable for use #oof ya

[drowninnoodles]

Hey uh, I don't normally do this, but can you reblog it? I want to get as many tips as possible :)

So uh, do any of you know how to start writing a story and creating it for a comic, for example? I wanted to make a game, but I don't think I could, that's why I thought about comics. But uh, I don't know how to start, so if anyone has any ideas, please feel free to write me, I would be very grateful for any help. :)

#I want to create my own universe and world #but I don't know how #I don't know if I'm creative enough #I'm just happy to read tips on what to do #I have a lot of ideas in my head but I can't put them into one story #please reblog #or write in the comment #or whatever #creating story #making comics #tips for artist #i don't know how to tag this

[nevertrulyset]

Have you ever wanted to cry, more than you've ever wanted to cry in your life, but your body just won't let you cry, so you go on and on, day after day, not having the satisfaction of feeling those tears leave the ducts? Do you only get sadder and sadder? Angrier and angrier? Did you finally get those tears out? Or did the universe decide to let you be happy and fulfilled without the need for a good cry?

#personal journey #i don't know how much longer i can hang on #I'm sorry if my posts lately are driving you away #i just have no one irl right now #i guess that's my fault #and i guess i could just try to talk to someone #but i don't know how #and I'm not comfortable enough with the people i'm around every day #i can't trust most of them #i keep thinking about that spot where i could 'fall' a pretty long way...

[killerandhealerqueen]

Do you ever get frustrated because you have an au that you want to write but you don’t know how?  Like the idea is good and you know the story could be good but you just don’t know how to fucking write it?  Yeah...that’s me with my Hades and Persephone au

#sass talks #hades and persephone au #i want to write this au so fucking bad #but i don't know HOW #and that infuriates me to no end #like i know i can change the myth around to fit the story how i want #but i'm also afraid that people are gonna be mad that it's not EXACTLY like the myth (you know how some people are) #ugh #i'll figure it out #somehow