#but i dont fucking understand what i did wrong

[renranram]

could you make a fic where jschlatt slowly realizes hes hopelessly in love with reader :D

Confusing

sfw + fluff

hopelessly in love schlatt with top student fem!reader

a/n: hahahahaha hi guys

this started ever since both of them became classmates in highschool, schlatt’s not a really huge fan of y/n, she's the star of the school for fucks sake, great grades, always in events, a model student, while he's just there

he felt like he didn't belong to be in the same class as her, he felt like he wasn't worth it to be her classmate, he felt shitty, that's where he started to avoid you

every time you try to initiate a conversation, a discussion for group projects, or just small chats in general, he'd run away, it made you get confused, making you think he dislikes you

you try to brush it off everytime, thinking he's just flustered or going through something, but he kept on doing it, so you finally gave up

it's been months since you two properly talked, schlatt was confused, why did she suddenly stop? he thinks, and slowly but slowly he was the one who started chasing after her, again

the man was even confused about his actions, unaware why he was the one chasing her, he didn't understand but the man would give out gifts in her locker

and you, of course, was confused by his sudden change, you thought it was weird so you brushed it off

schlatt himself was hurt, but it got worse, the boy glances at you, talking to another male classmate, giggling as you had your arm around his shoulder, making jokes and giggles

he felt genuinely hurt, jealous, upset and annoyed, but of course he didn't understand why he was feeling this way, it shook him

that's where he realized what he was really feeling, love, he fucking loves you holy shit, this… that's the explanation why he's been seeing you in his dreams, jealous whenever you're with someone, afraid when you're near, it all suddenly makes sense to him

while you… you were confused, flabbergasted by the gifts as you decided you want some sort of closure or an explanation of his sudden avoidance and now this

so there were you two, standing in the rooftop as schaltt pants, trying to calm himself from running all the way here

“ jay.. let.. let me just cut straight to the chase “ you mumble as you sigh, “ why? “ you ask, staring at him with confusion and longing

“ huh? “ schlatt asks, “ why what? “ repeats

“ why did you suddenly started avoiding me? then started pulling out this act after… like months? “ you ask, pulling out a crocheted bear, a gift coming from him

“ … “ he pauses, he didn't want to confess so suddenly, he just finally realized his feelings and now you're confronting him?

“ i just- i just dont understand… do you hate me or something like that? “ you continue, “ you're just so confusing “

“ y/n- “

“ do you hate me about something? did i do something wrong? i dont remember doing anything bad to you “ you continue with your rant as schlatt clenches his fist

he takes a deep breath as he pulls you for a sudden kiss, grabbing you by your cheeks, your lips touching eachother

your eyes widened, as you slowly melt into his touch as you slowly kisses him back, having to tiptoe just to properly reach his height

the two of you smack your lips together for a few seconds before schlatt pulls away, gasping, “ im so fucking sorry “ he mumbles, chuckling awkwardly

“ it's just.. fuck.. i.. like.. no i fucking love you okay? it's just… i realized it too late, i mean just fucking look at you, you're in our school's every poster, you win tons of shit, you have great grades, you're everything and i feel so… unworthy just to be near you.. “ he confesses

“ i thought i hated you, i thought i dislike you but it was the fucking opposite “ he chuckles, looking away as he scratches the back of his head

“ jay.. “ you mumble, “ fuck.. i really thought i did something wrong to you “ you pull him for a hug, “ i.. i uh.. love you too schlatt.. “

#chuckle sammy #chuckle sandwich #jschlatt #schlatt #sleep deprived podcast #jschlatt x reader #schlatt fanfic #schlatt x reader #jschlatt x you #schlatt x y/n #schlatt x you #jschlatt x y/n #jschlatt fanfic

[sunnnfish]

I think this chapter is sooo funny bc once again they’re having the same feeling!!! (Wanting to continue this pseudo dating thing) but they’re approaching it in different ways!!! Hirano feels the need to communicate to Kagiura about it bc they’ve suffered from so much miscommunication in the past, and Kagiura knows that after that whole convo about “moving on”, hiranos going to talk to him about it bc he doesn’t want to hurt/prolong this hurt, and he’s right! But his conclusion is wrong, I think it’s at this point where Kagiura realizes he’s making assumptions! And assuming that he’ll always be rejected that every bit of progress made will have to be made with sweat, blood, and tears is already selling himself short! It’s why at the end of the chapter we see Kagiura acting like he did in the beginning, like what he’s experiencing is too good to be true and he has to talk to someone about it who can level with him about how he’s supposed to interpret it, “how much hope can I have?” Or something, also I love the fact that this conflict doesn’t just ride on Hirano not experiencing romantic feelings but also Kagiura not being completely truthful about what he’s feeling, I think it was mentioned in the hide n seek chapter about this and something about Kagiura wanting Hirano to find out for himself which is so funny considering Kagiuras feelings only reached the point of no return bc of niibashi’s help 😭 idk these situations are always interesting bc Hirano points out contradictions in kagiuras behavior and Kagiura slowly leaves breadcrumbs as to what it means, so that way Kagiura will have his feelings understood not in an intellectual sense but bc he feels the same thing! Anyway KagiHira 5ever I hope they never stop being insane

ITS SO FUNNY!!!! ITS SO SO FUNNYYYY!!!! hahahahhaah. but god youre so right. they want the same damn thing all the time but they keep going about it in different ways or keep misunderstanding each other. like Yeah they were both thinking about the whole moving on thing... but kagiura completely misunderstood hirano. because he will always think its too good to be true. hes bringing up the moving on thing because hes going to reject me. its on some level a kind of self-loathing that ive been really really normal about lately. even though theyre trying the trial pseudo dating thing he doesnt 100% believe that hirano is actually trying. he thinks he has to keep begging hirano to look at him but little does he know hiranos never taken his eyes off him.

and so they both approach this Moving On conversation with selfishness. kagi selfishly begs hirano to keep trying. and he knows hes selfish and so full of desire and he kind of hates himself for it. but hirano also comes in selfishly--i dont want you to move on yet. let me keep trying. i want to understand you so desperately. and then yeah it kind of lightens up as kagi realizes what the fuck he just said and he has to be thinking about that How much hope am i allowed to have. and thank god he has niibashi to talk to about it UNLIKE HIRANO TAIGA. TALK TO SOMEONE YOU BITCH. SOMEONE WHOS NOT MIYANO. BECAUSE MIYANO IS INSANE. sorry. like you said kagi only realized the depth of his feelings after talking to niibashi. before that he was perfectly content with their relationship. hirano just really really needs to talk to somebody. even in a roundabout way. and i do hope its sasaki. sigh. anyways. also the thing about kagi hiding his feelings Yeah 1000%. and hirano pointing out the contradictions. aaauuuuhhggggg kagihira 6ever peace and love on planet kagihira

#hirano to kagiura #sunnfish.ask #anonymous #thank you for the lovely ask anon.... i love you....

[geometricgiovanni]

have you thought that maybe, i don't know, stalking his socials and making what i presume are hurtful comments on their blog, isn't the best idea??

be butt-hurt all you want over the fact she broke up with you randomly, cry in the couch and eat ice-cream in your. . . interesting house, but doing that isn't getting you any closer to why he decided to leave, only getting you farther.

you CAN ask them, but i doubt he wants to see your ass, so suck it up?? maybe think of the fact that maybe she had enough, i would've to tbh. you said you have had arguments with them, and which that is normal in a relationship, but with it ending with Unplez saying "go fuck yourself" which seems NORMAL, means you probs weren't good at the whole talking thing, and talking is pretty important.

also your house is disgusting, work on that, maybe get your pet to eat it all i dont know.

so maybe i don't know, become a better guy?? if i was literally a dickhead i would say, go ask one of his friends to ask why she broke up with you but i doubt anyone would want to talk to you so yeah! go kidnap more people or something, since it seems you have not one good coping mechanism.

your a cool guy tho!!1 like ur blog, pink square

WHAT THE FUCK DUDE ?! WHAT DID I DO TO YOU ??? QUIT ACTING LIKE YOU KNOW ME, FREAK !

SERIOUSLY, YOU ALL SERIOUSLY DO NOT UNDERSTAND HOW UNPLEASANT ACTED AS WELL AS I DO -- IF YOU DID, YOU'D UNDERSTAND MY POINT OF VIEW !

I DON'T WANT TO CALL HIM "UNSTABLE", BUT I DON'T KNOW HOW ELSE TO DESCRIBE IT ! HER GOOD MOOD COULD SHIFT IN MERE MOMENTS, AND I WOULD NEVER FIGURE OUT WHAT CAUSED IT !

HE GOT DEFENSIVE -- NOT JUST ANGRY, DEFENSIVE. HE MADE EXCUSES FOR EVERY LITTLE THING HE DID, AND IF HE COULDN'T COME UP WITH ANYTHING, HE ACCUSED ME OF FEELING A CERTAIN WAY ABOUT HIM...

"Is that all you fucking do? Watch and laugh!? Everything I do is one big fucking joke, is that it!?"

SHE STARTED AND ENDED EVERY ARGUMENT, AND ONLY HAD A PROBLEM WITH WHAT I WAS DOING IF IT INCONVENIENCED HER IN SOME WAY !

AND QUIT COMMENTING ON MY HOUSE ! SO LONG AS I CAN MOVE FROM THE DOOR TO THE LOUNGE, THERE'S HONESTLY NOTHING WRONG !

#geometric asks #plz the roasting paragraphs are SO FUNNY #AND THEN FINISHING IT OFF WITH A COMPLIMENT IM CACKLING #“u actually suck as a person and nobody likes u. luv ya!!!!!”

[penelopecolinb]

it seems like some of you don't really understand the social implications in regency england for an unpopular debutante when her good friend who also happens to be one of the most eligible bachelors of the ton declares that she's not worthy of courting in her own damn garden after being seen taking multiple liberties with her.

it has nothing to do with the fact that he doesn't return her feelings. it has everything to do with how absolutely careless he was with her. even if he didnt realise he was leading her on, that's what he did. he made things harder for a woman who already had so little by her side. he used to be one of the reasons she could stand being part of the ton, but in that moment he instantly became just like one of her bullies. and obviously that breaks her until she becomes what we saw in the sneak peek for s3.

people will see how her friends treat her and think it's fine to mock her to her face. she is the embarrassment, the laughingstock and it was fine when she thought she had the bridgertons by her side. but now she knows what colin really thinks of her. he validated all the bullies she had, when she was mocked for her looks or her shyness. that is such a painful betrayal, especially when not TWO FUCKING SECONDS ago he claimed that she was special to him!!!!!!!

is that not worthy of grovelling?????? cuz i fucking think it is.

#idc what ANYONE says #colin is going to have to fucking grovel for it #some of ya'll just really dont understand the nuance of regency england society expectations #i cant believe some of you guys think he did nothing wrong and he has nothing to apologise for #he's gonna lose his confidence this season? good #he deserves to know what he almost lost #penelope featherington #polin #bridgerton s3 #bridgerton season 3

[powerpolyculeshowdown]

I don't know what happened because the posts I've seen about it have been vague, but apparently some poll runner posted pro-life stuff???? and one post also mentioned guns idk i have no context for what's going on at all but I've seen a few mods make a post about their beliefs in response so just to be clear i am very strongly pro-choice as well as anti-gun.

i dont post politics and that won't change but apparently this needs to be said????

if you're pro-life and/or pro-guns feel free to unfollow. terfs and radfems and bigotry in general aren't welcome either.

#i still dont know which poll people are talking about #yes everyone is entitled to their own opinion but some opinions are wrong hope this helps #in other scenarios im open to discuss things with people who genuinely want to understand but i wont do that in my poll blog #what the fuck did i wake up to? #mod talks #id like to find out who it is so i can unfollow if im following them #but ive yet to see anyone mention the blog by name

[anotherpapercut]

just fully started crying bc I missed 4 points on my punnet squares on a biology test and I legitimately have no fucking idea what I did wrong. so things are going well

#i got like a 93% and the class average was like 77% so i just need to be grateful #but i just dont fucking understand what i did wrong #the comments say 'it looks like it got shifted over' but it looks completely fine to me??

[fellhellion]

i don't personally agree with the perspective that "miguel NEEDS to partially correct about canon events, otherwise he's a villain" because like. setting aside the issue of possibly naturalising the irl choices writers made (e.g. fridging gwen) through the concept of 'canon events', to me defining miguel's morality comes down to two questions:

What is Miguel's intent when pursuing his goal? <- it's unambigiously heroic. he desires to save people. and -

Can I plausibly understand how he has come to the belief system (and therefore goal) he has? Yes. I can understand why, when viewing the things he did (universal patterns of suffering between spidermen & the trauma of that dimension collapse), he came to the conclusion he did.

Keep in mind the other bits of information we and the characters are working with are:

Anomalies seem to affect the world they're in (Vulture appears to affect the Guggenheim's structure w glitches)

They're also in danger of dying if they don't have a stabaliser like the watch

But say for the sake of argument Miguel is completely wrong about breaking canon and doing so would not endanger anyone and the alt dimension collapsed for reasons utterly out of Miguel's knowledge or control. That still doesn't negate the heroic intent he operated by nor his desire to save people.

What "How much or little is Miguel correct?" affects is how tragic it makes Miguel's guilt and the moral concessions he feels that guilt about. Whether you would argue for it being needlessly tragic or bleak is another conversation entirely but how correct he is about what damage canon events cause doesn't actually change the fact he operated on sincerely good and heroic intentions.. And I think atsv already sets up that last point in an understandable manner.

#long post #tunes talks spiderverse #she came. she never shut up about miguel. she posted fdshfkshdfjsd #the reason i outline the knowledge of what seems to be the unquestionable consequences of anomalies in alt worlds #is so you can understand why miguel occum razor's miles changing canon as the reason theres a black hole under pav's world #we've already been shown it's possible for anomalies to affect the stability of a world (this seems to be a quiet change from itsv) and #spot firing up a baby collider and using his powers didnt open up a black hole under 1610 new york (as far as we know) #so if youre already predisposed to believing fucking w canon will cause harm i can understand WHY even if i think hes not correct #miguel and spider society assumes miles' action causes that unravelling. ESP when taken in conjunction w miguel believing his own world #jumping caused an unravelling and he applies that same fearful reasoning to whats happening here #i dont think hes correct but i understand WHY he came to conclusion he did esp when u keep in mind the kind of doublebind #miguel is IN already when it comes to being terrified hes got it wrong all over again but also being terrified of the stakes HE LITERALLY #THINKS HE EXPERIENCED (and he DID experience that trauma. even if it turns out it happened for a reason that wasnt his fault or even #related to him being in that dimension at all)

[acesammy]

i know i complain about this stats class every day but i swear to god i get points docked for the most asinine things every fucking time

#my response to the question: These variables are categorical bc [explains why]... therefore it is reasonable to use Chi-squared methods #the feedback on my response: 1/2 .. chi-squared methods can be used if both variables are categorical #uh.. WHY did i get points docked????? what the FUCK #and every. god. damn. time. i have shit like this #like on the last homework i got points docked for not explaining the population.. when i literally had a sentence going 'the population is: #i do NOT understand how to make it more clear #and dont get me wrong i am Struggling in this class generally speaking as well #but it sure doesnt help when every time i check the homework i get fucking angry bc the feedback makes No Fucking Sense #lea speaks

[hazardsoflove]

thinking about social worker percy again

#ppl who seriously believe hes gonna be a marine biologist. do you even fundamentally understand percy as a character #like yeah hes the son of poseidon he can talk to sea creatures but guys. thats not enough to make someone passionate abt something #and guys. the amount of math and science that goes into that??? i love percy and hes boy stupid but he is also not doing all that #*not stupid <3 #teacher percy is like. its fine but i dont agree with it i dont think he would have the patience or want to do something like that #but social work. with the way he grew up (and we love sally we know she was with gabe to protect him) and what he saw at the hands of the #gods not bothering to give a shit abt their kids and how he still felt unwanted by his dad and how he turned down godhood and instead asked #for the gods to give a shit abt their kids and stop making them feel so unwanted bc he knows how that feels and it fucking sucks #and i know damn well percy never wants to see another kid experience what he did. and hes great with kids ; #*(estelle for example obviously but he was also good with nico who had it worse than him) #and i know in my soul that this is what he would do #and everyone else is wrong bc i know him better than anyone else #r.txt

[llumimoon]

everytime i go out driving with my mom i consider crashing the car and killing the both of us lol

#cal rambles #call me henry oak the way i go i to a blind rage around her a la henry with barry #sorry for. not having +15 years of driving experience and not fucking knowing about shit you never taught me bc URE TEACHING ME HOW TO DRIVE #she will say. the vaugest or sometimes straight up WRONG directions and then be mad that i dont understand what the fuck shes saying in .01s #she'll be like how did you not know that !!! IDK MAYBE BC YOU DIDNT FUCKING TELL ME AND U WERE LOOKING AT UR FUCKING PHONE #girl. i would rather die #sorry for prioritizing safety over going fast and doing shit without thinking !!!!!!!! #she doesn't even answer my questions on the off chance that i have them. like. okay.

[altruistic-meme]

do i dare write the post looking at and trying to explain Queen Kristina's behavior? probably. i swear im trying to be less annoying about it but also like. i do what I want.

#also like *gestures vaguely at the person who used 'she had her son change schools after he got into a fight #so that he would have more supervision and structure WITHOUT CONSULTING THE 16 YEAR OLD CHILD HOW FUCKING DARE SHE' as an argument #like do i condone and agree with her actions? no. not necessarily. but i do UNDERSTAND why she did most of what she did #was she wrong a lot of the time? yes. were there other things she could have done? absolutely #still understand why she did what she did tho #anyway the real debate is do i feel like dealing with the people who are going to ignore me saying that i dont condone her actions #and continue to just say that shes an iredeemable cartoon villain? not really but also like #i havent gotten a chance to rewatch and really think about characters and their actions and stiff for a while #i wanna analyze it again!! i wanna just chill for a while!! #also that person vagued about me. IN the yr tag. which i clearly used. istg they could not have been older that 14. #anywho #i probably will do that this weekend #im off work on friday so i may just do a full rewatch and whip out my yr book #i mean i will do that anyway. whether or not i actually post about it is an entirely other question #young royals #shh ac

[ei-mugi]

one time i was talking to my american online friends about stuff and i was like "haha yeah people always say i look ambiguously european but cant place what i am specifically" and they were like "i dont think europeans have a look though." what do you mean. you dont believe different ethnic features exist...?

#just was reminded of it lol #one i no longer talk to used to insist that i was british because of my not-british accent and would not believe me when i said #no... i dont live there #id told them i was aussie. they didnt believe me though. like they thought i inexplicably had a brtisih accent despite never #having been there ever #another i said i didnt get a SSCoE for HS but a diploma. thats not what diplomas are here but they kept insisting i was wrong #like i have the certificate....its not a diploma.......... thats not what it says. #but they were like just call it a diploma : / its basically a diploma #i know AU isnt that different to the US but at least we are usually a little less annoying #i did see that asshat who was like 'uhhhh climate change means you dont have snow? not for us australians a-durrrrr X D' or w/e #what a twat. even from a purely selfish perspective we still also have climate change. its very noticeable. come on #anyway for a full decade i basically never met anyone online who wasnt USamerican.................... #so. i do have some amount of frustration. #they got mad at me for saying bikkie or pressie as slang even tho theyre super easy to figure out from context. also it doesnt matter #'STOP using slang you KNOW us americans WONT UNDERSTAND' #we were talking about christmas!?!? pressie is straightforward!?!? even if not...why are you so indignant #on a more awful note i knew one sheila (white) who was like very vocally/performatively into blm #but then one time when i mentioned aboriginal australians she was like 'what...ive never heard of those before...' #youve known me for years even if you never looked at anything in your life ever id definitely mentioned them before #pretty fucking important. both for my country and when caring about indigenous/first nations peoples. oldest surviving culture on earth #but she was like how was i supposed to know about them : / #because i thoguht you cared about these issues!?!?!??!? also just generally ohhh my god #how could you be vaguely aware of AU history as being similar to your own and then say you didnt know we had indigenous peoples #like. what do i even say #do you think... only america has indigenous peoples?????? #its fine not to know a foreign countrys history in depth but just...the absolute basics....about an issue you claim to care about... #sigh. ok this is too long. i feel that last one is justified to complain about tho

[fantasticgothicpeachsludge]

Is it just me or does it feel like a lot of the lis fandom doesn’t understand that teenagers can’t consent to “relationships” with grown fucking adults

#it’s also extremely disturbing and concerning because yall ARE adults #STOP SAYING RACHEL CHEATED ON CHLOE #I DONT CARE IF RACHEL WAS 18 FRANK WAS STILL TOO FUCKING OLD FOR HER #AND KNEW HER WHEN SHE WAS 16 #IT WAS PREDATORY AND WRONG #AND CHOLE PROBABLY REALIZED THAT WHEN SHE GOT OLDER #if she got older- #she may have been the age of consent but that doesn’t change the fact that it was predatory and wrong #again ​just because she says in her notes that she’s happy or whatever or that she looked happy in the picture frank had of her doesn’t #change anything #a teenager thinking that they’re happy and in love or just having fun doesn’t mean they aren’t being taken advantage of #most kids don’t realize anything is wrong until things /start/ getting scary or someone finds out and explains /or/ they get older #RACHEL WAS A TEENAGER WHO WAS BEING TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF #JUST BECAUSE SHE DIDNT REALIZE IT DOESN’T CHANGE THAT FACT #she literally was just to young to understand what was happening and how wrong it was #and even if she did she probably thought it was “different” for her #life is strange #rachel amber #lis before the storm

[malewifebillcage]

today is not a good day

#i am so done with this semester you have no idea #i dont even know why i am still in college i feel like i should just drop out #no matter how hard i study for an exam i cant get so much as a fucking C on any of them #i worked my ass off for this exam and i thought for sure i could get a high B but i didnt even come close #i dont understand i did well enough on my last two exams but i fucked this one up so bad and it doesnt make any sense #theres just no use in me even trying anymore ill never get better than a D on any of my exams #its like these classes are setting me up to fail #im so lost i dont know what is going wrong in my head but it just isnt working #and i hate this #sorry to vent on main but i am so done i am so tired of being stupid i want to go back to when i wasnt failing everything #im so genuinely lost because i thought i knew this material so well so what the fuck happened #to delete later

[nobody-expects-the-inquisitorius]

.

#that didn’t help. it made things worse. #high school failed me. my mother failed me. i failed myself and i’m still fucking failing myself #and i don’t have the willpower to do anything about it #i can’t focus i never have been able to i got through gcse on intelligence alonr i didtn have to work for it #and lockdown ruined me #i keep questioning whether my mothers right and i did choose the wrong degree #“you need to be on top of your game!” What if i dont want to. what if i just want to be me for once in my fucking life. #and i cant tell anyone #because nobody understands #could i have told him before he died? #maybe. maybe out of all of them he was the only one i could trust #because he never lied to me #he told me straight that he failed his a levels and STILL got into a good job because he knew how to work ppl #i dont know how to work people. i don’t know how to work myself #i trust people. i tell them whats worrying me and they use that against me #they make it my fault #maybe theyre right. maybe it is #so i lock myself away with my writing and ignore the issues until they get bigger and bigger and they crush me #idk how i’m going to face going back to uni #Zjust this constant stream of regrets #i just want someone to tell me i dont have to be perfect #and mean it #i dont have to be what they want me to be #ive always been isolated. it’s coming up to a decade since i started high school #And its just fotten worse

[borderlinegerard]

i am the poisoned blood running through my tired veins

#my posts #personal #ITS SO MOT FUCKINH FAIR. #since he hates me now i dont care if he sees this and im pretty sure i fucking blocked the reat of them so idontfucking care #i hate all kf them so much and i dont fucking care how bad they hurt. i hurt too #for some INSANE REASON i was the only oke that had to apologize. why did they never apologize . #they know they hurt me. He knkws he hurt me. #when j say this they think im selfish. they can think what they want. #byt jts fucking crazy to act like im the only one tjat did anything wronh #i fucking admitted i was wrong. but it wasnt enough. notjing is ever enough for them! #if He ever tries to text me again im not responding. it was stupid of me to respons. #i wonder what he would say if he knew that i chose ro respond by chance of a coin flip #if it had landed on tails i wouldnt be making this post. #he cares more than i do. i dont have the luxury of caring. #he says “i led him on” but if he wanted skme speicodx kind of love fucking say skmething #i didnt knkw i was supposed to be differenr. if he had said that from the dtart i never would have agreed. #i didnt want to change for him. #he shouldve been different and he shouldve been better #i shouldve been too. but atleast i can admit ghat #what the fuck do you mean when you say you understand why j do what you do and uou get it so deeply #but then you still leave. does rhat mean you understand how much you hurt me that first time #it barely hurts anymore. but i cried four times last nigjt #now i dont feel it and now i dont care. youll never knkw little i can let myself care #ill distract myself until i forget all about you because i csnt let myself feel any of this #i dont care if im not changjng the way you begged me to. thats not an option rigjtnmow #im still fighting to stay alive. i dont know that you understand what thats like #you say you get it. i tjink you just say that #you loved me and i dont like that. i warned you and you dwatted my warning away #how is that all my fault. #how is all of this my fault.